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skzhua · 1 year

Text

listen carefully ('your eyes' series)

♡ "Do you trust me?"

pairing: bang chan x reader.

genre: fluff, a glimpse of angst, idiots-to-lovers.

word count: 8,659

warnings: swearing, drinking, slight angst, chan and reader are so oblivious (mostly reader).

summary: your first mistake was to major in music in college. your second mistake was to change classes and end up in bang chan's. your third was to accept his help to pass the class. your last mistake was to push him away.

a/n: not gonna lie, this one took me forever and i don't like it much, though i think it's still very cute. 2 scenarios done out of 8!

SERIES MASTERLIST

You looked back and forth from your schedule to the classroom in front of you. When you applied for a music major, you did not expect that this would involve sound testing classes. You wanted to sing and write lyrics, not do any of this producing shit. Plus, the course was scheduled from 8am to 10:30am. There was no way you would be doing whatever this is every single Monday morning for an entire semester.

With an elongated groan, you walked in the classroom and found a place in the back. You weren't even going to listen, so you plugged your earphones in and put down your head on your desk. You slept throughout the whole 30 minutes of course introduction and woke up when another student poked your sides. You immediately walked up to the teacher and asked if there was a possibility for you to switch classes. To your luck, one spot was still available in her afternoon course and you just so happened to have the rest of the day off.

In the meantime, you took it upon yourself to explore the area alone. You stumbled across a small coffee shop, so you decided you deserved to be caffeinated for your first day. After ordering a chai latte, you went on with your self tour of the campus. Taking a turn in a hallway, you collided against another student, falling on the ground in the process.

"Shit, I'm so sorry." you heard as you rubbed your sides.

Looking up, a hand was already extended to you to help you up. "Yeah, sorry too." you grunted, still in pain.

The man helped you gather your things on the ground and gasped at the sight of your lyrics book, that had opened during the fall. "Are those poems?"

"Sort of." you answered shyly.

“Can I take a look?”

You acquiesced, a bit reluctant. He scanned through the pages and nodded as he read. Pausing for some parts, he was very expressive from what you had written. You nervously waited for him to finish.

“It’s pretty good! It could be made into a song, you know?”

“That’s the goal.” you laughed out.

“Are you in music, too?” he gasped, excited.

“Yes, I just transferred here.”

He smiled widely. “Welcome, then.” Smiling back at him, you felt intimidated by the interaction. An attractive man speaking to you on your first day? What could be any better? “I have to go to class. I’ll see you around then.”

He left with a wink and you were a blushing mess by then. Your gaze lingered on his back as he walked further from you.

"Y/N?" Looking for the source of the voice, you spotted your dorm mate, Dahye with a girl walking next to her. "May I present you Byeol." she smiled as she introduced her friend. The latter looked unbothered as she waved briefly before going back on her phone. "So? How's the first day?"

You shrugged since you really didn't have much to say. "Fine, I suppose."

"I see you met Chan." Dahye wiggled her eyebrows. "The brightest music senior student."

"So that's his name, uh." you muttered to yourself. "I bumped into him, that's all."

"Oh, well. I'll see you tonight! We are running late."

And so were you. Checking the time, you had a brief three minutes remaining before the class started. You didn't even know where the course was given. As you rushed through the hallways, you finally found an auditorium where the same woman from the morning class was standing. Bashfully, you walked in the room and sat at the first spot you saw, excusing yourself for bothering.

This went on essentially exactly like the morning class. The teacher introduced the course plan and answered some of the questions. The topics were interesting. However, you had no clue on how you would be using the material in your future career. Throughout your life, you had always worked alongside your father for the music you made. He was a music producer himself, meaning you did not need to worry of this part of the song making process.

After the professor dismissed the students, you were slowly putting back your books in your bag when you saw a shadow stop at your desk. Smiling as his dimples showed, Chan and another man were standing right in front of you.

"It makes sense you're a music major." he chuckled. "This is my friend, Jisung."

You bowed slightly to the man who copied your move before stepping away a bit. What was it with people and introductions today?

"I'm surprised to see you here, I thought you were in your last year of college." you said, getting up from your seat.

"Ah." he laughed shyly. "It's a complementary class, I've actually done it already, but the teacher asked me to help out her other students, like this guy over here." he nodded towards Jisung. "I won't be here every class, though. I'm part of the music club so I have to deal with that as well. And I work part-time at the library."

The man was truly an exemplary student, being so dedicated to school. It both impressed and scared you. He kept on explaining what he does for the campus and mentioned a few people. He was very social and comfortable to converse with, it made you feel at ease. He also suggested to give you a tour of the place himself. You felt uneasy from being shown such kindness, but you gladly accepted his offer. Anyway, you'd had to make some friends at some point and befriending this social guy might be of a good help. Eventually, Jisung left the two of you to go home. Chan stayed with you as you tried to find your way back to your dorm.

"Do you need help with that too?" he joked, but you were sincerely lost.

"Please?" you pouted, making him chuckle.

"Alright, what's your dorm address?"

As you searched for it on your phone, a girl came up to Chan from behind. She back hugged him as she started to talk with him in a very casual manner. Chan ruffled her hair as he hugged her back, asking her about her day. Having found your dorm number, you stood still to wait until he was done with his small talk. He soon realized you were still there, so he introduced you to the girl.

"Sora, this is Y/N. She's in my sound art practices class. Y/N, this is my best friend, Sora."

"Hi! Happy to meet you!" she smiled at you warmly. She was the first person aside from Dahye and Chan to be more civil with introductions.

"Likewise." you smiled back before turning your attention back on Chan. "I can go find my dorm alone if you two want to hang out."

"No, no. I'll show you, don't worry." he said and gave a sad look to Sora. "Do you mind going without me for today? I'll join you later."

"Yeah, sure." she answered, but hesitation could still be heard in her tone. "Do you want Minho and I to order for you?"

"It's fine, thanks. Later?" he said, kissing the top of her head and she nodded before leaving.

"Maybe you should go? She looks disappointed." you pointed out while starting to head towards your dorm.

"She's fine. Her and Minho can be awkward when left alone together, that's all." he shrugged.

You didn't insist any more and walked next to him and he asked you a few questions about yourself. His presence was warm and you were almost disappointed when you had finally reached your dorm.

"Thank you for walking me home."

"No worries." Chan chuckled. "Again, welcome to the school. I'll see you next week, then?"

"Yeah, next week."

He watched you go inside before leaving. It was no surprise that you were alone since Dahye would always come late. For the time being, you pulled out your books and planned out your schedule. You added your new workplace you'd be starting to work at to your weekends. The small convenience store on the other side of the street was a perfect job while still being in your studies. It paid surprisingly good and the shifts were very flexible.

Dahye almost broke the door when she came inside, her heavy school bag dragged behind her. It was close to 10pm and you wondered what she was doing out so late.

"If Byeol makes me watch the three To All The Boys I've Loved Before again, I'm killing myself." she grunted before sitting on her bed.

"She doesn't seem like the kind to be into romcoms."

She gave you a look as she huffed. "It's her entire life, I swear. Like, I get the hype, but to this extent? No thanks."

You shrugged your shoulders as you went back to your agenda. In all honesty, you were the romantic kind as well. The only difference was that you had very high standards in relationships, resulting to you still being single. You had never dated someone in long term because you would sense it if the connection was off.

"I got some ramens at the store on my way here. Want to share?" Dahye prompted, holding two bowls of instant noodles.

So far, you had two friends in your list: Dahye and Jeongin. The boy worked at the convenience store with you and was still in his first year, but it was his second term. The thing you absolutely adored about Jeongin was how aware he was of all the drama happening. And by everything, I mean everything.

"That girl went out with Minho." he pointed to the girl Dahye introduced you as Byeol who was behind you in the cafeteria. "It's so weird seeing them eat together."

"Maybe they fixed things between them." you shrugged your shoulders.

"I doubt it. Look at how Minho looks at her."

You glanced briefly at the group and saw that, indeed, Minho had daggers in his eyes. "You're very invested in this." you laughed.

"Oh shit." Jeongin muttered, suddenly trying to hide behind you.

"What is it?"

He pointed somewhere and you met eyes with a girl walking alongside Chan and Sora. She was visibly uncomfortable and sticking closely to Sora. The latter was as clingy to Chan.

"Who's this?" you asked.

"Youngmi. She lives in the same building as me and she is the embodiment of ethereal, if you want my opinion."

You exploded in laughter as you started to tease the young man who couldn't help but pout as his face turned red. "Looks like Innie has a little crush."

"Say it any louder please." he joked. "I don't know, I saw her a few times and she gets all flustered when she sees someone she doesn't know. It's cute."

Eyes still on the trio, Chan caught you staring and sent you a wave as he smiled. He tugged Sora's side, arguing for a bit, before he dragged the two girls with him. Soon enough, they were standing in front of you and Jeongin. By then, Jeongin had frozen completely as Youngmi said a small "hey" to him. Freshmen love...

"Do you mind if we join?" Chan said, already in the motion of sitting down.

"Go ahead." you gestured the seats.

While he positioned himself on the chair happily, Sora seemed unsure in following her friend's actions. Nonetheless, she sat down and started to eat in silence as Jeongin and Chan exchanged in a calm conversation. You noticed she glanced at you a couple of times, but you ignored her. She also seemed to drift her eyes towards Minho's table, almost as if she was looking for help. The girl had always been nice to you. Although you wouldn't consider her as a friend, she had grown distant to you for the past weeks and you had a good idea as to why. You weren't blind, you saw how infatuated she was with Chan and you were not planning on ruining what was going on between them. However, consciously or not, she was visibly starting to see you as a threat.

"I talked with Mrs. Ko." Chan suddenly addressed to you.

"About?" you said while taking a spoonful of your soup.

"About you."

You choked on your food, coughing loudly in the process as your throat started to burn. Jeongin patted your back in a soothing way as an attempt to relieve your pain. Sora, on the other hand, was quick to pull out a napkin to clean the small mess you had made.

"What do you mean, me? What did I do?" you asked once you had recovered from choking.

Chan laughed nervously. "She asked me if I'd be interested in tutoring you."

At this, you exploded in laughter, Sora too. You weren't sure on why she was doing so, but you were laughing because you didn't think a tutor was necessary, even less it being Chan.

"What's funny?" he turned to the youngest pair at the table.

Jeongin shrugged. "I mean, do you even have time to tutor? You barely have any time for the guys and I."

"It would be during the class period." You groaned at his words, throwing your head back in frustration. "She said you're going to fail if you keep going like this."

"Come on, Chan. We're barely halfway through the term. I can manage myself."

"Not sure about that. You have halfway left that you can use to actually get better instead of barely passing."

You looked at Sora in search of any help, but she shrugged her shoulders and went back to her conversation with Youngmi.

"I'll think about it..."

"Think about it?" Dahye yelled out making you block your ears for how loud she was being. "Why would you think about it? You've got the hot senior offering personal tutoring sessions and you say no? Are you dumb or are you dumb?"

You sighed loudly and let yourself fall on your bed. "I don't need tutoring, alright?"

"Sure, you don't." she rolled her eyes and went to grab her bag.

"You're going somewhere?" you lifted your head up.

"Yeah, to the coffee shop. Do you want to tag along?"

"I would but I have a shift starting soon."

She waved you goodbye and you were left alone in the room. Taking this as a good time to revise your notes for your upcoming exam while waiting for your shift to start, you pulled out your lecture book and flipped through the pages. Your eyes were reading, but your brain couldn't seem to actually understand what was written. You tried with the next chapter, but the results were the same. Time was passing quickly so you brought the book with you to the convenience store.

When you walked in, Jeongin was already there on his phone, yawning out of boredom. The store was empty so you assumed it was a slow evening. You punched in and joined the boy at the counter. You dropped the manuel in front of you and Jeongin's expression went surprised as he saw the thickness of your book.

"What the hell do you study in this?"

"Sound stuff." you breathed out as you opened it, going back to the chapter you were previously analyzing.

"Isn't it the class that Chan said he could help you with?"

"Precisely." you hummed, not taking your eyes off the page.

He stopped questioning and went back to his game. The shift continued like this, in silence, with a couple of customers coming in once in a while. Still, there was barely anyone so the both of you eventually grew bored of studying and playing. Jeongin brought two stools from the back of the store so you could sit instead of standing up for the remaining two hours you had left.

"Do you have an exam soon?" he asked.

"Just a small quiz that is not worth much. I'd say I'm more worried about the final exam. I don't mind not getting A marks, but from what I read, I don't understand shit. Maybe Chan was right after all..." you admitted shamelessly.

He laughed at your words. "I knew you would say that sooner or later." You gave him a look, which only made him laugh more. "It's okay asking for help. And I swear Chan is a good teacher, he helped me with statistics once."

"I'll see. I might not ask him, though, Have you seen Sora the other day? I could swear she wanted to decapitate me just because Chan said one word to me."

"That's Sora for you. She's just protective of him. I don't talk to her much other than about Youngmi so I can't say how she is really." he shrugged and went to the slushie machine to make himself one.

"Ah, right. Your little crush on Youngmi." you chuckled. "How is that going for you?"

"You'd be surprised. I actually talked with her. She was having a hard time so I comforted her." he said proudly before slurping on his drink.

"I am impressed." you clapped your hands silently. "I bet she needs someone like you around."

The conversation was interrupted when Chan walked in the store, accompanied by Minho. They were seemingly disagreeing on something as Minho was rambling on with incoherent words. He stopped when he noticed that Chan was no longer listening, but was staring right at you instead.

"Hey." he coughed, once he realized he had been looking for a little too long. "I didn't know you work here."

"Yeah, been here since the beginning of school pretty much."

He made an 'o' shape with his mouth as he nodded before walking through the aisles. Minho walked behind him and started his rant again.

"This is a good time to ask him about the tutoring." Jeongin shot at you.

Your eyes widened to him. "Are you crazy? I said I'm not asking him."

"Why? Because you're scared of Sora?" he joked, but your face remained serious. "Oh shit, you are."

"I don't want her to think I'm stealing her man, that's all."

"So you're stealing Chan?"

You huffed. "No, of course not."

"He's not her man, anyway. Plus, he's the one who offered. Just tell him."

"No."

"Yes."

"Jeongin..."

"Tell him."

"Tell who what?"

You jumped at the sudden voice, almost letting out a yell until you noticed the two older men putting their purchases on the counter. Chan's look switched between Jeongin and you, waiting for you to answer.

"Yeah, Y/N. Tell who what?" Jeongin snickered as he leaned back, arms crossed and a proud look on his face.

You sent him a glare, but answered nonetheless. "Ask you about this tutoring thing..." you mumbled barely loud enough to be heard.

From Chan's grin, though, he had clearly heard you perfectly. "So you made up your mind?"

"It's not like I have a choice, really. I've been over the same five pages for hours and still don't understand shit."

While you continued your chat with him, Jeongin scanned their articles and made Minho pay as they were in a discussion of their own. Chan talked about how the tutoring would work, how you didn't have to pay for anything since the teacher was already doing so, how he wasn't going to give you homework other than some tests here and there to make sure you were following along.

"I won't remember all of this tomorrow." you laughed.

Chan immediately reached for his phone and put it in front if you. "Give me your number."

You raised an eyebrow, suspicious. "You're very straightforward."

"No, dummy." he chuckled. "So I can send you the information and plan out a lesson."

"Ah." you cough embarrassingly. "Right."

They left the store after you typed in your phone number in his phone. Unconsciously, Chan was still staring at your contact information, a silly smile that reached his ears on his face.

"Dude." Minho nudged his arm. "It won't disappear on its own." he mocked his friend.

Chan grumbled some curses to him and put back his phone in his pocket. They went back to his place for their usual hangout of the week and Changbin, his roommate, had already prepared a game while waiting for them to come back. At the coffee table, Minho sat next to Sora and Chan went to the dining room to pull out their groceries. Changbin's friend, Chunhwa, had been invited and helped the man to bring the food to everyone.

"Where is Jisung?" Minho asked, taking a sip of the soup Chunhwa had placed in front of him.

"He's probably comforting Hwayoung again." Changbin shrugged as he took the spot next to Chunhwa.

"If he keeps doing this, he'll end up in a deep depression." Sora commented and everyone around agreed.

"You're one to say that." Minho joked as the girl hit him, but Chan didn't get it.

Was she helping out her crush to get over someone too? If so, why didn't she tell him about it? Yes, Chan was that oblivious. Being too busy mothering his younger friends and with school, the least of his worries was romance. He did think of it from time to time, but he's always seen it as something for later.

"Alright, I'm blue this time!" Changbin announced as he picked up a pawn in the said-colour.

"I wanted blue." Chunhwa pouted and the man was quick to give it up for her.

"I'll be green, then." he sighed.

Sora and Chan exchanged knowing looks as the girl picked their usual colours, red and white. They started their game while eating and sharing laughs. Unlike others, the group preferred spending quality time instead of drinking until they blacked out. They would party, of course, but not as often as other college students. As the board game went on, Chan clapped his hands together and turned to talk with Sora.

"I talked with Y/N."

"And?" she said with a frown, moving her pawn on the board.

"She accepted my offer. I told you she would." he grinned.

Her reaction wasn't much what he had expected from his friend. Instead of joy, she looked sad, hurt almost.

"That's great." she forced a smile.

"Yeah, I'll text her the details later. It'll probably be once or twice a week. Depends on her level, honestly."

"Right." she nodded slowly her head. "Sorry, I have a headache. Minho, do you mind helping me get some medecine?"

Minho stood up immediately, reaching a hand to help her get up. "No, of course."

Chan frowned. "Are you alright? I can help if you want and-"

"No." she interrupted. "I'm okay, really. Thanks." she gave him that same sad smile before Minho led her out of the room.

Silence remained while it was Chunhwa's turn to play. She and Changbin were giving each other looks, something Chan couldn't exactly make out. Seeing that they were in their own world and that they had to wait for Sora to be back to continue on with their game, Chan took his phone out as he grew bored. The moment he opened it, your contact information was displayed on his screen, once again. For some reason, he instinctively clicked to open the message app.

Chan: Hey, it's Chan! I hope you gave me the right number, haha.

Y/N: Hey! Yeah it's me, haha. I didn't expect you to reach out so soon.

Chan: Me neither, to be honest. I thought about our arrangement and it can be twice a week if you'd like that instead of just during class period.

Y/N: Hmm, I'll have to check my schedule but yeah, it should be fine.

Chan: Great! I won't bother you for much longer now.

Y/N: You're not bothering, I swear. :)

Chan: Good. :) I'll let you know when we can start.

Y/N: All good. Good night!

Chan: Night. :)

"I'll go home, if you don't mind." Sora announced as she entered the room, Minho following behind.

"This early?" Chan said, putting his phone away.

"Sorry, I don't feel so well." she smiled, guilt seen on her face.

Chan stood up and joined her at the front door. "Let me walk you to your dorm, at least."

She shook her head. "Minho's coming with me already. Thank you."

"Alright." he said unsurely, hugging her tight. "Let me know if you need anything."

"Always. Good night Chan. Bye, guys!" she waved at the remaining pair before her and Minho took off.

Chan was still frowning at her weird behaviour, but he shrugged it off. Maybe she had a bad day. The weirdest part was how she stuck to Minho since they never were this close with each other. It might have changed without his knowledge. He went to help Changbin out with cleaning up and wash the dishes, Chunhwa tagging along.

"Do you mind if she stays the night?" Changbin asked.

"No, it's alright." Chan replied as he gathered his things to head to bed.

Locking himself in his room, he let out a long sigh before snuggling himself under his covers. Opening his phone, he saw your name lit up. He smiled immediately.

Y/N: Can't sleep. I thought this meme would make you smile when you wake up.

As the lessons kept going, you grew fond of Chan. He was nothing but respectful to you and was treating you like a princess, almost. He would always bring snacks, take breaks after some time to make sure you are not too tired, and he was insanely funny. He had started to be more attentive to your needs recently, and you could not help but hope he might like you as much as you liked him. But this was not possible, right?

You scrunched your nose as you listened to Chan explaining the material for a third time. You were amazed at how patient he had been with you. Your eighth lesson together and, yet, you still had no clue about anything in this course. Frankly speaking, you wanted to drop out, but Chan had insisted you continue with some speech about determination and shit. The coffee shop his friend, Seungmin, worked at was a cozy spot for your sessions. However, you had learnt Dahye's crush was the barista and she would almost always be there, trying to get his attention. It was close to sad to watch.

"I'm sorry, I really don't get it." you grunted, rubbing your face with your hands.

"Hey, it's fine. I know it can be hard to comprehend properly." he tried to reassure you while patting your back.

"You don't get it. If I want to make my own music, I should be able to understand, right? I suck." you grunted dramatically.

"Woah, there. How about I show you some concrete examples instead? I think it'd be easier for you." he suggested but you were still confused.

"Examples? We have the teacher's already."

"Yeah, uh, I could make you listen some of my tracks." he laughed out shyly.

"Your own tracks?" you exclaimed in surprised, eyes wide open. "Well, thinking about it, it makes sense you make your own music. Still, I didn't know."

"Yeah, I don't go around telling people." he added, blushing again. "I could show you right now, actually. Do you have something planned after this?"

You opened your agenda and scanned through your schedule. Your empty schedule. "No, the rest of my day is clear."

"Can I invite you over? My music stuff is in my room."

While the idea seemed appealing, you weren't convinced it was safe. Chan was a handsome man, and although you had grown closer with him, he could still be a fuckboy for all you know. The main reason, though, was that Sora would probably hear about it and you didn't want to hurt the girl by going over to her friend's apartment. Still, it was in the context of a class you were very much failing. At this point, you would take anything if it meant it would make you pass.

"Okay."

His own dorm wasn't far from yours. The walk to there was quick and you were standing in his kitchen before you knew it. It was neat for a boys apartment. Some exercise machines were installed, unsurprisingly since him and Changbin were visibly working out. There were a few takeout bags on the table as they would rarely cook themselves, but otherwise, it was one of the cleanest places you had seen.

"Do you want something to drink?" he asked, opening his refrigerator to serve himself a glass of water.

"Not for now, thanks." you smiled.

Chan led you to his room that was as clean as the rest of the dorm. He had made himself a work space for his music. On his desk, there were two monitors standing with a mixing console. He had placed a piano keyboard in the corner and a few different headphones were laying around the table. Right next to the desk was a microphone along with its isolation shield. He had a very good setup, you were almost jealous of it.

"This is amazing." you breathed out. "This stuff is brand new!"

"I saved a lot for it." he said, sitting down on his chair. He pulled his other one towards you. "Sit down, I wanna show you something."

You did as told and he started to look into his files, scrolling through them attentively. He spotted one and clicked on it. He waited a moment before playing it to give you time to put his headphones on. Once he started it, the track's intro started out beautifully. It had a soft melody, but it slowly turned into a more upbeat sound. The beat build up, until it dropped and you would lie if you said you didn't feel goosebumps at that moment. When it ended, you took the headphones off and stared at him in shock.

"You've got some freaking talent. I'm speechless, really."

"Thank you." he mumbled and blushed. "I'll play it again and I want you to pay attention to the different notes and sounds. Cover one ear only, I'll explain as it plays. Listen carefully."

Replaying it, he pointed out sounds and paused to explain. He did this for the next 40 minutes or so and, surprisingly enough, you had finally understood the material. It shocked you how easily you got it only from a few tracks made by Chan himself. His talent was undeniable and, if anything, it only made him more attractive to you.

"What is this one?" you said as you moved the cursor to a specific file.

"No not this-" Too late, you had already started to play it on his speakers. "... one." he finished his sentence in a whisper.

The ballad was powerful, and his lyrics were more relatable than you'd like them to be. So far, he had put only instrumental tracks. Needless to say you were dumbfounded by his voice. You were deep into the song, until Chan took the mouse from you and paused it.

"Hey!" you pouted.

"It's a pretty personal one." he justified, avoiding your eyes.

"Yeah, the lyrics are rough. I think it's beautiful. Sorry that I listened to it when you didn't want me to." you apologized sincerely.

"You think it's beautiful? I think it's a bit much."

"Not at all!" you argued. "I love it, really."

"Thank you."

An awkward silence filled the room, small tension building up. To wash it away, Chan clicked on a new file. It was a ballad, but it was much softer this time. He stood up from his chair and extended a hand to you. You looked at it suspisciously.

"What?"

"May I have this dance?" he said in a funny tone.

"Cringe." you huffed.

"Come on, you deserve a little break."

"And I dance like shit." you deadpanned at him.

"Do you trust me?"

You found it ridiculous, and cheesy. Without protesting, you still took his hand and he held you by the waist, swaying from side to side. You were uneasy at first, but grew more comfortable as he continued to guide your moves along the music. At some point, you hadn't realized how close your bodies were getting until you could feel his fast heartbeat with your head against his chest. You looked up at him and he already had his eyes on you. While this felt wrong, it was a feeling of safety. Before you could speak, the music changed to another one of his tracks, a more funny beat this time. You detached yourself from him and tried to find something to say quickly to ignore the moment you just shared.

"You make a lot of different genres." was all you could find to say.

It seemed to work as Chan started to tell you about his experimenting to find what style he liked better and which one fitted him the best. Eventually, the conversation drifted to a casual talk, learning more about each other. After listening to more of his songs, he had offered you to stay for dinner, but you refused. He had already made you go through a rollercoaster of emotions, you didn't know what was going to happen if you stayed any longer.

"You have everything?" he asked as he led you to his front door.

"Yeah, I think so. Thank you for today, it feels great to finally understand this stupid class."

He laughed before bring you into a hug. "Good. Tell me how the exam goes?"

"Of course."

When you were about to turn the doorknob, the door opened on its own. There she was, Sora, standing in the entrance with her eyes locked on you. You immediately felt like you got caught in the middle of a crime, although you had done nothing.

"Y/N." she said in a warm tone, making you feel bad how sweet she was still to you even though you knew how it must hurt her to see you with Chan.

"Hi, Sora. I was just leaving." You turned to Chan to give him one last smile. "See you, Chan!"

You didn't let him answer and left the place immediately. You were grateful for his help with the class. But now, you were stuck with guilt, longing, and a crush on a man who was already taken by a wonderful girl. You were fucked.

Ding.

"Anyway, so I came home and-"

Ding.

"For fuck's sake, Y/N. Just answer him." Jeongin whined.

"No." you said firmly. "So, as I was saying, I had just gotten home and-"

Ding.

You shut your eyes at the annoying notification sound. You had stopped your lessons with him unexpectedly when you realized you could be ruining a lifelong friendship. Plus, it would surprise you if he reciprocated even a tiny bit of your feelings. You told him you didn't need his help anymore and that you would rather focus on your other classes for now. He was understanding, of course, but you had stopped replying to his daily memes. He asked you if something was wrong, but you didn't answer. You had skipped the next sound art class to avoid him and had not left your room much since.

"Answer him." Jeongin whined again, louder this time.

"No!"

"He's my friend too, you know? I can just tell him how you're scared of your feelings." he threatened.

"You wouldn't."

"Watch me." he challenged you.

Ding.

You groaned and checked your phone and saw that, this time, it was a reminder that your shift was ending earlier for you to go do your exam. "I need to go. Cover for me?"

"Yeah, yeah." Jeongin rolled his eyes.

"And you better not talk to Chan."

"No promise." he grinned and you sent him a glare before taking off to head to class.

You bumped into a depressed looking Jisung when you walked in. He greeted you poorly, eyebags under his eyes and lazy movement. You would have asked if he was okay if it wasn't your final exam. Having studied like never before (and thanks to Chan's help, but we do not mention him at the moment), you felt quite ready, though your stress level was at its peak.

The questionnaire was filled with practice exercices and multiple choices. The teacher played sounds through the speakers for you to identify and describe them. You were baffled at how good you were doing, so good that you were among the first people to finish. Jisung was done not so long after you, so you walked out together, telling each other how you did on the exam.

"By the way, I wanted to make sure you are doing okay. You don't look so good to me, no offense."

He looked at his feet. "Yeah, I'm alright. Just..." He hesitated a little since you weren't close to him much, but at this point he didn't care. "Hwayoung and I fought and there is Chan's party tonight. I know she's going but I'm not sure if I want to face her yet."

"You should go."

His face lit up at your words. "You think so?"

"Yeah, I do. You two are practically inseparable from what I see. I think it'll be a shame to not try to fix things up."

"You have a point..." he said and thought for a second. "Alright, I'll go. Are you coming, too?"

While his situation was very different from yours, it did have some similarities. You had briefly seen a message from Chan, inviting you to his party, but you didn't want to face him. Dahye had begged you to come, saying she would want at least a friend around since Byeol would most likely not be going. So when you thought about it for a moment, it might be a good moment for you to talk things out with Chan.

"I guess I can stop by."

When you arrived home, Dahye was nowhere to be seen. You noticed a note on your desk and she wrote that she went to Seungmin's to get prepared. Looks like you were going to get ready alone. Rummaging through your clothes, you picked out a nice short-sleeved shirt with a skirt to match with it. You didn't put on much makeup, nor did you do anything extravagant with your hair.

Jeongin: Dude, Jisung told me you are coming tonight?

Y/N: Yes, sir.

Jeongin: Youngmi is going and I was planning to confess. I need your emotional support.

Y/N: If you'll be my emotional support to talk with Chan, then yes I'll help you.

Jeongin: Deal! But for real, Jisung convinces you to come in two seconds and not me? Offended...

You could only laugh at the texts. You grabbed your belongings and walked out of your dorm, heading to Chan's. After a small ten-minute walk, you were standing in front of his door, nervous. You had not even thought of letting him know you were coming, you just showed up. Anyhow, you knocked on the door and waited for someone to let you in. Some time after, Changbin happily welcomed you in, showing you where the snacks, the drinks and the bathroom were. After thanking him for his kindness, you parted ways with him to join Jeongin. To your surprise, he was already talking with Youngmi and they seemed to be doing just fine. Jisung was there too, but he kept looking at his phone every once in a while, seemingly waiting for a text.

"Am I late?" you asked and Jisung shook his head.

"We pretty much all came in advance. Minho, Hyunjin, Byeol, Hyunjoo and Felix are missing." he shrugged and took a sip of his drink.

The room was already filled with some people from your classes, and others you had never seen before. You scanned the room as you tried to spot Chan, but your eyes stopped on Sora instead. She was setting the food on the table alone, so you decided to go see her, trying to make your way through the crowd. Once you reached her, you realized she wasn't alone. Chan was giggling with her about something as he was setting bowls of chips on the table. It took them a few seconds to notice you and greet you sweetly.

"HI! Y/N, um, wow. You made it! I mean, I didn't expect you to be here. I should, uh-" Chan rambled on cutely.

He was interrupted when Sora kicked his rib with her elbow before smiling at you. "Good to see you."

"You too. I hope I'm not interrupting."

"Of course not!" they both hurried to deny.

"I should go greet the others. Talk to you later?" Chan set his eyes on you, and left.

You were now alone with Sora as she went on with preparing the snacks. You offered to help, but she didn't let you. You weren't sure what to say exactly which caused a small silence to grow. Luckily, she was more talkative than you were.

"I really didn't expect you here. Chan had kind of given up after you ignored him."

Her words hurt you more than you'd ever admit, but she was right. "It wasn't intentional. I mean, I did purposely ignore him but I had reasons."

She shook her head to shush you. "I'm not asking you to tell me why, you must have had good reasons. I just..." she trailed off before taking a deep breath. "He told me about how you almost kissed and I'm just letting you know that Chan is not someone to play around with. I don't know why he likes you so much while barely noticing me, but I'm warning you. You don't know him like I do and I know Chan is going to prioritize who he loves first. I don't want this thing going on with you two to be hurting anyone."

Frankly, you did not know how to answer. You were lost on why she was telling you all of this. You only registered the parts where she said he liked you, that she liked him, and that she didn't want things to be hurting anyone.

"I came here to fix things with him." you said after thinking of your words. "I don't know the history between you two, and visibly you are closer than anyone here. If I hurt you in any way, I'm so sorry. I just wanted to pass my class, that's it."

"No, I-"

"It's okay, Sora. You two clearly have something going on. I know for a fact Chan doesn't like me like that and he's way better off with you."

You didn't even let her speak again, and left the party immediately. You felt your mind getting fuzzier and you couldn't think straight about this whole situation, you just wanted out. Among the pack of people, you kept on bumping into one person to another, apologizing constantly. You ended up bumping into Chan, to your luck. You didn't want to talk with him anymore, so you hurried to walk out, but he was quick to recognize you and stop you by grabbing you by the arm.

"You're leaving already?" he asked worriedly.

"I'm not in the mood for a party that much." you made an excuse up on the spot.

"Do you want me to walk you home?"

"Gosh, Chan. Stop acting like you care so much." you snapped at him, which made him let go of your arm. "Sora's waiting for you in the kitchen if you are wondering."

On that note, you left him standing alone, baffled and confused, and you head back home as tears built up in your eyes.

Dahye had invited you and Byeol for a little trip to the beach not even two days after the end of the semester. Before going back home for the summer and to avoid any possible interaction with Chan, you had gladly accepted. You were going to stay there for a couple of days only, but long enough to be enjoying the nice weather and the water.

While you were laying on the sand to enjoy the natural light, Byeol pulled out her phone to show you her messages with her boyfriend, Hyunjin. He was being a dramatic lover, telling her to not stay out in the sun for too long, to eat properly and to send him lots of pictures because he missed her. You were more than happy for her, but your heart stung. Chan had tried to reach out, obviously. This time, you had the courage to mute his contact and completely ignore him. You didn't have the strength to block him just yet. Maybe you were still hoping for something to happen with him.

"He said he'll paint the pictures of the sea that I sent him." Byeol commented, all smiley, as she put her phone away.

"That's adorable." Dahye said in a dreamy tone. "Although I would probably cringe if Seungmin pulled one like this on me."

The girls exchanged laughs and continued to chitchat about their romantic moments. Your mind wasn't fully there and you had issues concentrating properly. Eventually, the girls noticed and called your name to snap you out of your thoughts.

"Is it about Chan?" Dahye dared to ask, and Byeol gave her a look.

"Kind of? I should stop thinking about it. He's got Sora so everything is fine." you forced a smiled, but it didn't convince your friends.

"You should have talked to him. He fought with her that night." Dahye said, putting her hand on your shoulder. "And he thought of knocking at our dorm, but he chickened out."

You looked at her blankly and blinked slowly. "You didn't tell me this."

"It's not my place to do so. I'm sure he tried to tell you, but you've been quite ignorant towards him." she shrugged and from seeing your reaction, she knew she had to do something about it. "Look, just enjoy our time here for now and worry about this later, okay? Chan can wait a couple of days."

You nodded, agreeing that you were here to relax and enjoy, and not to fall into self-pity for the rest of your summer. Decisively, you repositioned yourself comfortably on your towel and did nothing but let yourself go with the sea breeze.

That night, Byeol and Dahye went to some fancy restaurant together close to the hotel you were staying at. You would have come too, but you wanted to go explore the neighbourhood instead. So after they left, you brought your camera with you to take some pictures around. It came to your mind that you could develop them and make a nice framed collage to hang in your room as a memory. With everything in your bag, you left the hotel and started your evening with walking in a park nearby. The trees were decorated with lights as well as the path. You snapped some photos, but upon seeing so many couples, you decided to change scenery.

A couple of streets away was an old-fashioned part of the town. There were many local shops opened and you took the time to stop at some of them, notably a small bakery. The woman was so sweet that she gifted you some cupcakes, not forgetting to compliment you on how beautiful she thought you were. Thanking her, you took the cupcakes from her and walked out of the store.

"She's not wrong, you know?"

You froze at the voice, sounding too much like a man you had grown to love over the past months. Uncertain if it was your mind tricking you, you turned around to come face to face with the one and only Chan. There he was in one of his many black attires and he had seemingly just stepped out of the bakery as well.

"If I didn't know you, I'd say you're stalking me." you joked once you had collected yourself.

"I would never." he huffed. "But I did ask some help from Dahye to have some time with you."

It was your turn to scoff. "You're unbelievable."

"I know, babygirl." he smirked and you would have punched in the air right then from how the butterflies he sent you made you internally squeal. "Mind if I take this stroll with you?"

"I do mind." you refused while you were actually dying to go on a romantic walk with him.

"I thought you trusted me enough." he acted offended and you let out a laugh, still not believing he was right in front of you. "Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Trust me?"

Lacking a response, you stuttered out incoherent words. Wanting to hide from embarrassment, you shut your eyes and turned on your wheels to go on with your walk. Chan was, however, determined to not let you get away again, so he ran to catch up on you.

"So..." he started, but you were still refusing to glance at him. "I think we should talk."

"How's Sora?" you asked nonchalantly.

"Y/N, can you not bring her up for once? She told me what you two talked about at the party. Wasn't she clear enough when she said I like you?"

Stopping on your tracks, you finally dared to look at him and you regretted it immediately. His eyes reflected nothing but despair, sadness and lust.

"She was trying to-" you started but he cut you off quickly.

"Everything she said was true. Except for the part that we would hurt each other." he took your hand in his and you wanted so bad to squeeze it back, but you couldn't find the strength to do so. "The first time I read your lyrics, I knew you would become someone dear to me. You're as passionate about music as I am, you are easy to talk to, although I would debate on that with how you had ghosted me. I guess what I'm trying to say is I don't want you to push me away anymore, because I like you a lot."

"What about So-"

He laughed as to to interrupt you again. You were stubborn, for sure. "She's been involved with Minho for some time, she's got nothing to do with all of this."

He hesiated, but took a step forward to put his hand on your cheek. You had never seen him blush so hard and it was one heck of a cute sight. He brought your face closer and you leaned into his touch, foreheads now grazing against each other.

"I'm sorry." you finally spoke in a soft tone.

"Don't be sorry, just don't run away again."

"I won't."

That's all Chan wanted to hear. After containing himself since the moment he saw you in the bakery, he gave in and kissed you passionately. It had so much emotion and feelings into it. You could feel his sincerity only through his touch and it was enough for you to cry, but out of joy this time. He rubbed his thumb on your cheek to dry your tears off and pulled you closer to him. The scene could not have been more perfect. You were kissing your goddamn crush in the middle of a cute lively neighbourhood in the evening with the smell of cupcakes surrounding you. You eventually detached from each other, but still remained close.

"I assume this means you like me too?" Chan chuckled.

"Very much so, yes." you smiled.

"Can I take you out on a date?" he asked shyly and you sent him a smirk.

"This stroll you wanted earlier can be it."

He smiled like a child at your words and laid a kiss on the top of your head. "Sounds good to me."

#stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids series #stray kids scenarios #stray kids college au #stray kids bang chan #bang chan x reader #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fluff #bang chan scenarios #bang chan fanfic #bang chan fluff #bang chan college au #stray kids your eyes

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justrandomayatolover · 9 months

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Relationship hcs or something w/ Eula, Kazuha and Ganyu

Includes: gn!reader, some sort of sweet talking ig? talk about insecurities (Kazuha's part), I literally have no idea what it is exactly pls help

Here's part 2 and part 3:D

Eula:

Eula seems like a type that needs understanding in relationship without a word since she's not good at talking about her feelings

So instead she just looks at you, for example to help her patch some wound she has with reaching, to help her out

At first she simply looks you in the eyes with her stern glare

That's slowly drives off to the ground, softening so only you can see

There probably won't be a time where she will experess her love to you in words that aren't "I'm grateful" or something along the lines

So instead she does it by swearing to herself she will protect you above anyone or anything else

Or maybe deciding that she will bake you something and finish training earlier so she can do this

At first she was very confused why she felt the need to be close to you so you had to slowly explain to her how love works

Kazuha:

To me Kazuha will probably always be the more open with words in the relationship

In his opinion love is like two souls dancing next to eachother, longing to be close and dance together

His love would be very unconditional and eternal

Everytime he writes a poem his mind automatically somehow connects it to you, it can be through your eyes, hair, smile or little details such as freckles, moles or scars that make you so stunning to him, that he can't help but be amazed everytime he sees you

Everytime he writes letters to you, he always, and I mean always, adds some petal or leaf in your favourite colour and add a verse or two about how said petal or leaf reminds him of some sort of spot you two were at together

The moment he found out that you're insecure about something on your body, he wrote a whole list of reasons he loves that part of yours and then read it out to you (kissing it if it's kissable[like scar somewhere])

Ganyu:

Ganyu would be very awkward at first but it would slowly would die out, not fully tho

She's definitely sleep talking and that's where she's expressing her real emotions to you

How she treasures you dearly and every night hopes this day wouldn't end just so she could be close to you as long as she can since she's immortal

At first she wanted to ask Cloud Retainer for some advice how to tell you about her feelings but then got scared that Cloud Retainer would want her to take you to her so you can listen about her past

So she decided to keep it to herself

Until one day you found her asleep next to Yiyan Temple and got both confused and worried about why she was there

That was first time you heard her sleep talking, at first about work, then about Keqing and Ningguang, then about Qingxin and Morax and finally you

Next day when you asked her about it she got all nervous and ended up rushing to do something she had still many time to finish

And slowly from that she got more open

What do I call it tf, I will probably do more with other characters

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact hcs #genshin x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin impact headcanons #genshin hcs #eula x reader #kazuha x reader #ganyu x reader #eula x you #kazuha x you #ganyu x you

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moldygreenblue · 4 months

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Sometimes I forget that 'Cats (1998)' trailer appeared on Barney's Great Adventure as one of the previews

Having finally watched Cats (2019), it's not as bad as everyone made it out to be when it first came out. Like it is very not a good film, but there's a charm to it that I can't help but like (some parts have more charm than others; Skimbleshank's number is a good example of it). But honestly speaking, I wouldn't watch it again.

Or at least, the not whole movie in its entirely. I feel maybe if I watched it as a bunch of disjointed music videos with a theme being an adaptation of T.S. Eliot poems, I enjoy it a lot more (with edits that omits the interruptions; The Rum Tum Tugger number really could have done without the Rebel Wilson's interruptions).

And having watch Cats (2019), and knowing I have Cats (1998) and being obsess with Cats in my younger years (mainly pre-teen years) and still on occasional listen to the songs of any production I can get access to (chores, excising, trying to drone out stuff by putting in my headphones, etc), I realize that I haven't watched the movie in a few years. And I figure, "Hey! Why not watch the movie you watched so many times when younger that annoyed the hell out of your family?"

And I re-watched it. I honestly forgotten how much I enjoy it! Got to love the obvious edits in parts of songs especially so (I know that some cut parts were release/found, and I hope someone managed to edit them back in in an ultimate fan edition).

Having re-watched it, and maybe it's because Cats (2019) omitted this part out due to the restructuring of having Victoria as the protagonist + audience stand in, something finally occurred to me that never did crossed my mind before.

Why is 'The Man Over There' in the junkyard in first place?

(Note: I know this applies to other/all productions, but since I watched the 1998 movie, it's the one with 100% focus)

This legit had me going down a spiral of over-thinking, and an answer (of a wild mass guessing kind), which will be under the cut for this post got a bit longer than I expected:

So, during the pyramid section of Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats, a boot drops from a nearby house or apartment/flat [near/over the junkyard] to interrupt them. The cats don't stop their singing. Sure, they pause, but they go back to the singing in seconds. And also steal away the boot (they don't want anyone tripping over it).

It's only after they finish the number does Asparagus notices that "there's a man over there". We now have a random human stumbling on a bunch of cats singing and dancing so late at night (how late, very late for Jemima to eventually sing 'Daylight' and let us know it's almost dawn near the end of the musical).

And on a similar note that I swear is related to to the topic at hand, Asparagus is the cat to notice the man first before everyone else. I don't want to say he ratted the man's flabbergasted look of 'wtf is going on what is a jellicle cat'. But I'm 100% certain Asparagus is smirking as the rest of the scene unfolds. That to me, personally feels as if he knew what likely going to happen next (re: the man is now stuck with them for the rest of the night).

So, back to the topic. Why is 'The Man Over There' in the junkyard in first place? Why did the man came to the junkyard of all nights?

Because 'The Man Over There' (who Asparagus knows and/or recognizes), dropped the boot into the junkyard in the first place.

Stay with me. This make sense when you overthink all the details.

The Man Over There lives near/over the junkyard. He has a window over it. It's not the prettiest sight to look at, but he's not cursing its existence. It's not causing trouble.

Until now, on this particular night. On this particular night, a colony of cats are suddenly meowing and screeching together. The cats in their congregation, wakes the Man up. And the Man is not happy. He is grumpy for getting waken before his alarm could do it, and he thinks he can get a bit more shut-eye if he can gets the cats to stop their 'singing'. And what does the Man does? Throw one of his boots.

There is silence for about five seconds, before the 'singing' starts up again. The Man was not expecting that outcome. He thought they would scattered and leave. Now being fully awake and realizing he needs his boot back (it's a good boot, and it wasn't cheap), the Man decides to go to the junkyard to get it back.

In the junkyard, the Man is rightfully freaking the hell out. He is now hearing the cats sing. Like, actually singing that he can understand. He sees them dancing (are they dancing like they appear in the musical or are they dancing like actual cats on hind legs, I don't know). He is rightfully freaking out, and confused as fuck because he truly has no idea what is going on, in terms of his situation AND due to his sudden ability to understand the singing cats.

As the Man is freaking the fuck out, Asparagus sees the human. Very shocking to see a human in the junkyard of all nights! And the human here is one Asparagus knows! Or rather, seen more frequently than he likes. The Man is a familiar face Asparagus has the odd luck of running into in many places in London, though the Man never seems to notice Asparagus.

And Asparagus quickly connects the dots regarding the boot from earlier ('Oh, so it's HIM who dropped the boot? Well, he's going to get a night he will NEVER forget.') and rats the Man out.

And to be honest, the fact that the Man did in fact, stay for the whole ball, is something I feel is fanfic material and shock there isn't a single fanfic from the past to now that explores this.

#moldy watching movies #cats #cats musical #cats the musical #cats 1998 #wild mass guessing #*checks to see when i used that tag before* oh! okay that makes sense it was during pre-p5 release. fun days

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barriss · 9 months

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ao3 stats game

The gorgeous @lokinightfury tagged me for a thing, because she's amazing, so here I am doing the thing!

Rules: Give us the links to your wonderful words with the most hits, most kudos, most comments, most bookmarks, most words, and least words.

Most Hits: Evidently, my magnum opus, The Only One (Enjonine, Les Mis) WHICH I AM STILL WORKING ON, I SWEAR! I actually worked on it quite recently, so if anyone is still interested, I promise I will finish it!

Most Kudos: Surprisingly, Max's Annual Uncanny Hootenanny (Hellcheer, Stranger Things) which is a more recent thing I made. Very proud of it, glad people enjoyed it.

Most Comments: We have a tie between Max's Annual Uncanny Hootenanny and Munson's Not Your Mummy's Creepy Crawly Costume Party (both Hellcheer, Stranger Things).

Most Bookmarks: This is actually a shocker, but it's Sway My Way (Love is like a good pair of underwear) (NeuYako, Majin Tantei Nougami Neuro). This was just a random smutfic I wrote for this manga I was into waaaay back in the day.

Most Words: Unsurprisingly, it's The Only One again, sitting at about 64k. The next chapter is already at over 12k, and there's still quite a bit left to write.

Least Words: Not counting a stupid poem I wrote for Enjonine, which I can't really consider fic, the winner is Follow your inner moonlight (Don't hide the madness) (Rei/Jadeite, Sailor Moon), which is part of my Senshi/Shittenou series I wrote a long time ago.

I don't really know who to tag, so feel free to give this a go!

And thanks again for tagging me, Jenny! Love you!

#tumblr games #enjonine #hellcheer #neuyako #Rei x Jadeite #Mars x Jadeite

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glamorizingchaos · 2 years

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Summer Rains Part 5:

Beauty In The Rain

Javier Peña x F!Reader

Word Count: 6.7k

Rating: M (To be safe 18+)

Warnings: Angst, swearing, pining, smoking, kissing, groping, implications of sex, pregnancy mention, genuine human emotions, probably OOC for Javier... whoops. No beta, just yeeted into the void. any typos. Let me know if I have missed any!

Summary: Javier finally decides what he wants his future to be and Chucho wins Grandpa of the year. Reference for the necklace that is mentioned. The Poem included in the epilogue is by Raymond Garfield Dandridge. Who's poem brought me peace when life was not.

A/N: This is a really bittersweet moment. I again apologize for how long it has taken me to finish this story. Life was overwhelming and I was trying to push myself into writing smut because I know it's popular. So I hit a wall because I was trying to force something out of myself that I didn't really want to write and personally didn't add much to the story. So I took the pressure off of myself. There is no smut in here just implications and allusions to it. It is not something I am just yet comfortable writing, but maybe someday. I also spent WAY TOO LONG obsessing over the timeline and trying to get everything to make sense. I am fairly certain some new grey hairs appeared on my head because of it. I gave up. I did my best. I am not perfect and this is a hobby. I have loved every second of writing this ending and I hope you like it too. Thank you so much for sticking with me and for your patience as I lose my marbles again and again. I have so many people I want to thank and dedicate this to. So many people who without them, I probably never would have posted this story or continued writing it. I hope they know who they are and how much they have meant to me. If you have ever left a like, a comment, a reblog, or sent me a message please know how much that means to me. I hope you never hit a red light and that your pillow is always cold at night. You are angels and the world is so much better with you in it. If you got this far you are a gem. I hope to write more on this blog in the future but I am done trying to force myself into a schedule. I want this to be a fun creative outlet not another obligation for me. Thank you for reading and without further ado, our two idiots need a happy ending.

Masterlist Previous Part

Likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated! I’d love to hear feedback!

The card slips from your fingers and falls to the counter, forgotten.

The next morning you wake to the sun shining through a sliver in your curtains. Weird… usually I get waken up by a hungry infant demanding a boob. As soon as the thought crosses your mind you glance over at the crib to the right of the bed. It’s empty. Your nose scrunches in confusion but then the light banging of pots and pans echoing from the kitchen catches your attention.

You slip on your slippers and slowly pad your way to the kitchen. Your limbs still heavy with sleep. You find Chucho dressed and ready in his Sunday best for church as he makes breakfast. Sofia sitting in the high chair babbling away with her grandpa. He softly whistles an old ballad to her as he warms up a bottle. You mumble a greeting to Chucho and he tosses a cheery good morning back. You sweep your hand across Sofia’s forehead pushing the soft brown curls out of the way as you lean down to kiss her.

“Why didn’t you wake me?” You question Chucho as you make your way over to the cabinet to make yourself some tea.

“You were tired and there are bottles out here. I wanted you to rest.” Chucho replies simply with a light pat on your cheek. As if it was the most obvious thing in the world. I mean why else did you pump if not for this reason? Plus he was right, you were exhausted. Sofia had a rough night again. Gotta love sleep regression. Your guess was all the change in her routines. She needed normalcy and stability, and honestly? So did you.

Once the bottle was ready for Sofia, Chucho swoops the baby girl up in his arms to feed her. A soft smile blooms across your face at how sweet Chucho is with Sofia. He has a way with her. She rarely cries when he is around and he has quickly become her favorite person. Your baby girl has Chucho completely wrapped around her finger. This is all you ever wanted for your daughter, Sunday morning breakfasts and a family that is bursting with love. Lost in thought, the creak of a floorboard draws your attention to the doorway. Javier had paused before entering the kitchen, the bags under his eyes were dark and he still had yesterday’s clothes on. Your eyes meet his weary dark orbs, and his frown deepens as he looks back, almost studying you. You shifted under his gaze like a bug under a microscope.

A wave of annoyance begins to build in the pit of your stomach. Javier has no right to judge you when you did nothing wrong in the first place. You straighten your back and cool your expression into one of annoyed indifference. He quickly looks away from you as if your gaze burned him. He makes his way into the room and pats his dad on the shoulder in greeting as he swipes a mug for his coffee.

“You look awful mijo.” Chucho was never one to pull a punch.

“Gee, thanks Pop.” Javier’s voice was devoid of any emotion as he slumped on the counter with his chin pressed to his chest. Javier really did look a mess and he looked pale. You felt the familiar pinprick of tears start to burn your eyes, everything that led you both down this path started with your lie. You want to be furious at him; to yell, scream, smash something, but you can’t move. You are frozen as the quiet guilt rages a war in your brain. You blink and try to will away the traitorous tears threatening to spill and notice Chucho staring at you with a wary gaze. You quickly excuse yourself mumbling about taking a shower. Anything to escape, to give you time to think.

Chucho inhales deeply as he watches you practically sprint out of the kitchen. He turns to his son, brooding and quietly sipping his coffee with his eyes closed. Chucho looks down at Sofia’s milk-drunk, blissed-out expression and slowly walks over to set her down in the pack n’ play set up in the corner of the kitchen. It used to be in the living room but Sofia got fussy when she couldn’t see Chucho cook.

“You know one day you are gonna push people too far and they won’t keep coming back for more.” Chucho stares counting Sofia’s soft breaths as he addresses Javier.

Javier slowly opens his eyes as his jaw rocks. “I know.”

Chucho turns and points down the hall towards where you are, “That woman is at her breaking point. And look at you! Pale and smelling like a chimney. I cannot sit here and watch the two of you destroy each other. Either figure out what you want and fight for it or just stop and let her go.” Chucho’s tone was severe as he verbally lashed his son.

“Pops I-” Javier’s throat was dry and his voice cracked pitifully.

“No. I am taking Sofia to Church. You-” He stabs his pointer finger into Javier’s chest “Are going to talk to her. You are letting your happiness slip away from you. No one is taking it away.” Chucho reaches into his pocket and presses the small black card you left on the counter into Javier’s free hand. “If this is enough to sway you then you are far stupider than I thought you were.”

The card feels cold in Javier’s hand. His dark eyes stare unblinkingly at it. Not even looking up when Chucho leaves the room with Sofia in tow. He turns the thin piece of paper over and over between his fingers. How could he have let something so small, so meaningless burrow under his skin? He knows his father is right. He has to stop letting this fear and insecurity control him and make him lash out at you. He needs to make a choice and he needs to make it now.

“Oh, did Chucho leave?” Your voice, soft and missing its usual melodic tone, tears Javier’s eyes away from the card. There you are standing in the hallway hair still damp from your shower but loosely braided to the side. You have your favorite navy blue linen overalls on, the ones you like to wear to clean around the house. You are a vision of domestic bliss. But he can see the weariness in your eyes. The hollowness that lingers in them now.

Javier clears his throat roughly, shoving the card into his pocket. He has no idea how long he has been standing staring at it. “Uh yeah, he took Sofia to church with him.”

“Oh. Okay.” Your voice is void of emotion or any of your usual lightness. Javier feels stiff and awkward like his limbs are full of sand and he doesn’t know how to be around you anymore.

You turn to walk away from him and Javier starts panicking. Is it too late? Has he pushed you too far?

Before he can talk himself out of it, Javier blurts out the one question he should have asked the day you arrived in Texas. “Can we talk for a second?”

The silence was deafening. You stopped mid-step towards your bedroom and did a half-turn back to him. Your brows furrowed as you studied the man before you. The Javier that stood before you now was not the same Javier you left behind in Colombia. So many things have changed, for both of you. The wrinkles around his eyes have grown more prominent and the gray in his hair is more noticeable. He still stands with his hands on his hips and hunched shoulders, always carrying the weight of the world on his back. But it was something in his eyes, those piercing eyes that once glowed like embers lost that spark and fire, that once spoke to you. Javier’s dark orbs transfixed you, their darkness overwhelming but there was a sadness to them now. A haunting darkness in them that goes deeper than you knew.

“Sure” You held his stare for a moment, trying to maintain a calm demeanor. His eyes widened as if he assumed you’d refuse his request.

Javier quickly shook the surprise from his face and schooled his expression back to its normal frown. He motioned towards the porch and opened the front door for you. You slowly lowered yourself into the nearest rocking chair as Javier leaned on the railing across from you. The crack of the front door shutting echo across the ranch. Javier cleared his throat as he flexed his hands on the railing and stared at a crack in the porch floor. He would kill for a cigarette. Or a bottle of whiskey.

“So, um, what did you want to talk about Javier?” You never used to call him Javier so much. Only when you pretended to be angry at him or when you were teasing him. It used to be fun, hearing you huff it out between laughs or moan it in his ear. Now his name on your lips is a reminder of the mess everything has turned into. Of all the mistakes he’s made. Of the lies, he’s told. All the reasons you left him. All the reasons that he hates himself. No wonder you left and maybe you should again. Maybe that is what’s best.

–

“Javier?” You calling his name a second time caught his attention and his eyes finally met yours briefly before looking away again.

“Right. Yeah. I wanted to discuss your plans.” Javier’s hand scrubbed the back of his neck as he avoided your gaze.

“My plans?” You schooled your face into the picture of neutrality.

Javier huffed in frustration, “Yes. Your plans. Shit, you know what I am trying to say here.”

A cold fire lit behind your eyes, a predator eying their prey as they narrowed. “No Javier I don’t. I don’t know what I am doing here. I thought I did, for a moment I thought I knew what you wanted. Now? I am lost. You want to know my plan? I don’t have one. Not since you showed up in Miami and turned my whole life upside down.” You released a heavy breath trying to calm that fire that sparked in your veins.

Javier’s eyes flashed with anger and he set his jaw before he continued pressing, “I know that everything has not been the easiest lately, that I have not been the easiest to deal with-”

You scoff and wrap your arms around yourself. “Because everything was always so perfect between us.”

That struck a chord with Javier. He made mistakes. Tons of them even; but he always did what he thought would protect you. To keep you hidden from his world, from him, and the darkness that followed. He nearly growled his response, “I did what I had to do to keep you away from all that shit. To protect you.”

“Protecting me? Is that what lying to me about sleeping with your informants, all while you were fucking me is? Pretty sure that is exactly the opposite of protection Peña.”

Javier’s eyes turned cold and his next words cut you like a knife, “Well, I didn’t fucking leave without a damn word and hide a child from you.”

“You didn’t exactly give me any reason to stay. I was just a casual fuck to you and we both know if I hadn’t left, you would have.” You internally curse yourself for the tears brimming your eyes. You hate that after everything he still has this power over you, over your emotions.

Javier's whole body goes stiff, his voice is quiet barely audible above the sound of the ranch. “Is that really what you think of me?”

You lock eyes with his. Your anger quickly begins to dissipate the minute you see the pain in his eyes. “I-” You start but stop yourself.

Javier shakes his head as if he can shake the heartbreak away, “No. I don’t want to fight with you. This isn’t coming out right. I didn’t mean to..” But his voice trails off. He is desperately trying to find the words to tell you all the feelings and emotions that have been storming around in his head since the day you left.

It is a minute before either of you speaks. “I didn’t sleep with my informant that night. The one before you left.”

“What?” Your voice is barely a whisper over the frantic beating of your heart thumping in your ears.

“I hadn’t slept with any of them for a while. People just assumed and I never corrected them. I-I didn’t want to. I couldn’t admit to them or myself that you meant more to me than I let on. That you still do. I am sorry that I fucked up so much back then. That I pushed you away and made you feel that I would rather you run away than tell me you were pregnant. I am so sorry.” The tears in Javier’s eyes were clear as day.

“Javier” You slide out of the chair and stood behind him. Before thinking you reached your hand out and touched his shoulder. “No. I am sorry. What I did was unforgivable. I knew how much you did to protect me and I left like that knowing it would scare you. But in that moment, all I wanted was for you to hurt as much as I did. I was stupid and angry. What I did was selfish and cowardly, even if I thought I was protecting Sofia. I should have stayed and fought for this. How can you ever forgive me?”

“I did the moment I saw you with Sofia.” Javier’s hands find their way to your cheeks and he wipes away the tears streaming down them.

“Where do we go from here?” Your hand finds its way to his cheek as you look at Javier.

He rests his forehead on yours, “I don’t know.” He slowly leans in and brushes his lips against yours. Giving you every opportunity to push him away. But you don’t. Your arms wrap around his neck and pull him as close to you as possible, needing the grounding force of his body against yours.

Javier’s hands move to your neck, your waist, your hair, and back to your face. His scent surrounds you. He pours every ounce of emotion within him into this kiss. He pulls you flush against his chest and a whimper falls from your mouth. It only urges him on and he deepens the kiss, sliding his tongue against your bottom lip. Begging you to let him in, to let him taste you again.

You immediately give in to him. To the feelings coursing between the two of you. You reach up and pull his hair and a deep growl reverberates from Javier’s chest. His hands slide their way to your hips, then to your ass and he squeezes. It’s as if he thinks if he lets go of you, this would have all been a dream. His movements are hurried and needy. He is desperate for more of you.

You finally pull away to breathe but Javier just continues kissing down your jaw to your neck. He finds your ear lobe and sucks it into his mouth and pulls. Scraping his teeth on the delicate flesh. “Let’s go inside.” He whispers into your ear but you are jello in his arms. Hardly able to think straight. He slowly starts walking you backwards into the house. As you cross the threshold into the front hall your hands grip his jacket, trying desperately to tear it off him. Javier drags his mouth away from your neck long enough to rip his jacket and shirt off before descending onto your lips again.

This time as he crashes his lips to yours he grabs a handful of your ass and yanks you into him, his leg falling between yours. You let out a sharp gasp which he takes quick advantage of and pushes his tongue into your mouth. It's clumsy and frantic how the two of you grip each other. Trying to get as close as humanly possible. Your back slams into the nearest wall as you reach for the belt loops in Javi’s jeans and drag him impossibly close to you. As he is pressed against you Javi lets a deep groan loose as he drags his teeth down your throat, nibbling and sucking on the sensitive skin, leaving marks as he goes.

You are drowning in him. The sensation of his body pressed against yours, his hands digging into your ass, your thighs, tugging on your hair. The feeling of his lips on yours after so long without him. It's all too overwhelming, this is all you have been thinking about since the day he burst back into your life. Javier pulls away from your neck and brings his hands to the sides of your face.

“Wait, wait… Is this okay?” His voice is gravelly and lower than usual. His deep brown eyes are burning into yours. You want to laugh. Of course, this is more than okay, this is all you crave anymore. Javier. He consumes every waking thought and he invades your dreams. He is the biggest nuisance and he is everything you have wanted.

“No.” The minute the word leaves your mouth Javier shifts to move away from you but you stop him by grabbing his belt and pulling him back in. “No this is not okay. This is perfect.”

The two of you fall back into a familiar dance; your bodies fitting together perfectly, like two harmonies coming together in perfect time. Javier knows exactly which strings to pluck to make you sing, he has every curve, dimple, scar, and stretch mark memorized. As you lay back trying to regulate your heartbeat, you find Javier tracing the new marks on your stomach; gifts from the beautiful daughter you both brought into this world. He lightly runs his fingertips up and down, side to side. Silently adding them to his memory of you. He every so often presses soft kisses on your hairline. After a few silent moments, his eyes finally meet yours, a small smile decorating his face. You reach up and trace the lines at the corners of his eyes. You both have changed so much but at this moment, here, it suddenly feels like no time has passed between the two of you. You are back at his apartment in Colombia with a cool breeze blowing through the window carrying the smell of the Arepa shop down the street.

Javier’s hand paused in its path, “I know we have so much yet to figure out-”

“Please let's not do this now.” You begged him not wanting to ruin this perfect moment.

“Will you ever just let me finish a sentence?” Javier sits up to look down at your face, a playful glint in his chocolate eyes.

You lean up and place a chaste peck on his lips, “Nope.” and try to turn away from him.

“You are gonna want me to finish this one.” Javier takes the chance to playfully pinch your sides and laughs as you yelp and try to squirm away from him. “I know we have a lot to talk about and figure out. But I want you to know that I am all in. I want to build a life with you and our daughter, I want a house and a dog and the fucking white picket fence. I want it all. But I want it with you. I love you. Te Amo mi alma. Tienes todo mi corazón y siempre lo tendrás.”

You stared wide-eyed up at him, completely frozen in place. Javier starts to panic. He pushed you for more than what you were ready for. He said too much too fast. Javier Peña, ever the fucking moron. Why can’t he ever keep his fucking mouth shut? Should he take it back? No that would be so much worse. Javier was so lost in the spiral of self-doubt and intrusive thoughts that he didn’t even notice the tears beginning to overflow out of your eyes or the way that your hand was squeezing his. When you reached up and held his cheeks in your hands he was finally able to silence his thoughts.

“You are everything I have ever wanted and I promise you I will work every day to show you how much I love you and to make up for all the time we lost because I was stupid and scared. You, Javier Peña, are the most frustrating man on the planet. You are stubborn and pig-headed and you make me want to scream half the time. But you are also the most generous, kind-hearted, and selfless man I have ever met. You gave me a daughter and I cannot thank you enough for that gift. I love you with my whole heart and I cannot wait to build a future with you.”

“You scared me there for a second Hermosa. I thought I had lost you there.” Javier quickly wipes a traitorous tear than escaped his eye. “And you have nothing to make up for mi amor.”

“Yes. I do. I am not going anywhere. I am all in.”

Javier leans down and places another soft kiss along your hairline before sitting up and stretching his arms above his head. He slowly stands as you lean your head back and close your eyes, taking in the moment. You hear him rifling through his pants on the floor by the bed, his belt buckle jingling and then softly thumping on the ground.

“Dammit” Javier huffs under his breath and snatches his briefs from the scattered pile of clothes around the floor.

“What's wrong?” You keep your eyes closed starting to feel the tug of sleep starting to drag you under.

“My cigarettes are in my jacket pocket. I’ll be right back.”

Javier closes the door lightly, knowing that you are starting to fall asleep and not wanting to disturb you. He follows the trail of clothes from his bedroom to the hallway until he finds his jacket tossed on top of Sofia’s stroller. He begins digging through the pockets for his pack of cigarettes.

“¿Buscas estos?” Javier turns and sees Chucho leaning in the doorway, the red carton of cigarettes dangling in his hand. “Las cosas salieron bien, ya veo?”

Chucho smirked as he gestured to the random pieces of clothing and shoes tossed around the hallway leading to Javier’s room. Javier cleared his throat awkwardly and snatched the cigarettes out of his dad’s hand. He slides one out and Chucho pulls a lighter out from his back pocket and tosses it to Javier. The cigarette glowed a vibrant orange as Javier lit it and took a long drag before tossing the lighter back to Chucho.

“Uh, sí. Sí, lo hicieron.” Javier returned his father’s smirk with a goofy grin. “Realmente bien. ¿Dónde está Sofía?”

“Dormido. Ni siquiera llegó a comulgar antes de desmayarse.” Chucho turned to walk back into the living room as Javier let the cigarette dangle from his mouth and started collecting the miscellaneous clothing strewn about.

“Recuerda usar protección esta vez. No tenemos lugar para más sorpresas.” Chucho called from the living room. Javier rolled his eyes and made his way back to his room. Back to where you were waiting for him.

Things weren’t perfect. They never would be; you two aren’t exactly saints. But the sight that lay before him in his room reminded him that doesn’t matter. You were curled up in a ball in the middle of his bed with blankets scattered around and halfway on the floor and he could hear your soft snores fill the air. He pulled the blankets around you and contorted himself to fit next to you. He leaned back on the headboard and stared down at your sleeping form silently through the haze and smoke. He could hear Chucho as he moved about in the kitchen. The clangs of pots and pans combined with the soft rhythm of your slow breaths and soft snores. For the first time in a very long time, Javier felt completely at peace. He knew that he would rather fight with you than live another day without you. He knew in that moment that Sofia was the greatest gift to have ever happened to him; that you gave him that gift. He knew that from this day on he will fight, claw, and bleed for the two of you. His little family. Los Amores de su Vida.

2 years later

“This stupid fucking thing” with a deep sigh of exasperation Javier rips the bow tie out from the collar of his dress shirt and tosses it on the floor.

“Why the hell did you even buy the fucking thing. You barely button your shirt most days.” Steve hands Javier a glass of whiskey. “Drink and chill the hell out.”

Javier downs the amber liquid in one go, shoving the glass back into Steve’s waiting hand. “Forgive me for trying to look respectable on my fucking wedding day pendejo.” Javier swiftly unbuttoned the top two buttons and slid on his suit jacket. He stood adjusting and readjusting in the mirror for what felt like an eternity. Everything had to be perfect. You deserved perfect and he will make it happen if it kills him.

Chucho popped his head through the door, “Es hora Mijo.” Javier took a deep, shaky breath and turned to face his father. Chucho smiled and grabbed his son by the sides of his face and pressed his forehead against Javier’s, closing his eyes for a moment, “Estoy tan orgulloso de ti.” Chucho Leaned back and Javier could see tears brimming in his father’s eyes.

“Gracias Papá.” Javier smiled back at Chucho as he smoothed his sweaty palms on his pants.

Chucho glanced at Steve, “Well then, let’s get this show on the road. Vamos.”

Your knuckles were completely white from the death grip you had your bouquet under. Connie had just made her way down the aisle with Sofia as the flower girl, awkwardly toddling in front of her. If her performance at the rehearsal told you anything, she dumped the entire basket of petals immediately over her head. But you don’t care about any of that. You only care that you are marrying the love of your life and the father of your child. The past few months haven’t been easy, you are marrying Javier Peña after all, the man is a well-documented hot head, and frankly, you are no better. The two of you have fought tooth and nail to be together and to build a life, a future.

Of course, nothing ever came easy for the two of you. Soon after you two made up, Javier decided to finally tell you he had to go back to Colombia. Oh, you were angry, for sure. Javier had to sleep in Sofia’s room for a couple of days before you had calmed down enough to talk to him. No matter how angry you were that he didn’t tell you, you knew Javier. He would never be able to rest until the Cali cartel was finished. He never got over being sent home for working with Los Pepes. He had unfinished business and even though you hated the idea, he went to Colombia while you and Sofia stayed in Texas. It was hard. He called. You sent care packages with drawings of Sofia and pictures. It didn’t change the milestones he missed. He did get leave for her first birthday, but it was never going to be long enough.

When you finally heard the familiar crackle of Javier’s truck on the gravel driveway you felt like your heart was going to burst out of your chest. Like you were finally able to take a full breath of air for the first time since the day he left. You had been in the kitchen all morning with Chucho making a welcome lunch. You were covered in flour and didn’t even take your apron off before sprinting outside. You flung the porch door open just as Javier was racing up the stops and launched yourself into his arms, nearly toppling him to the ground. There were tears and kisses and whispers of “I love yous” and “I missed yous” and “you are not leaving again.”

The two of you eventually, begrudgingly, untangled yourselves and Chucho brought a just woken up Sofia to the door. Javier immediately swooped her into his arms and rocked her against his chest. He was able to keep his cool with you but the minute his baby girl was finally in his arms again, he lost all composure and tears began to fall from his eyes. Javier took Sofia into the yard so he could try and get her to walk for him. You plopped down on the porch steps watching them play and babble back and forth. You could watch them for hours.

“Sofia, okay baby girl, walk to Mama. Go find Mama.” Javier walked behind her ready to catch her if she tumbled backward. Though she was walking on her own now, she was still unsteady and fell often and fell hard.

“C’mon baby girl. Come to mommy!” You reached out your arms as Sofia giggled and wobbled her way towards you with Javier in tow. Her stumpy little legs stopped right in front of your lap and you reached for her hands to steady her. As you grabbed her hands, she was holding something in them. She’s been hoarding rocks lately and you reach to grab it only to find that this rock wasn’t in fact a rock at all. It was a small box. “Javier, what is this?”

Javier was kneeling in front of you with his hand on Sofia’s back, “Something I should have done a long time ago.”

Now here you are almost 6 months later and you are waiting to walk down the aisle in front of all of your friends and family.

“Are you ready Mija?” Chucho grabbed your hand and placed it in the crook of his arm.

“More than ready.”

The whole day was a blur. It was full of tears and laughter and pure joy. Now as you sit with Javier on the porch swing gazing at the stars with your head in his lap as he runs his fingers down your back you feel completely at peace, at home.

“I know we said no gifts.” Javier paused his movements as you sat up.

“Javier, you promised.”

“I know but, I couldn’t help myself.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a long slender, black velvet box. “Open it.”

“This is not fair. I don’t have anything for you!” You opened the lid and the tears were almost immediate. Javier may be the grumpiest man alive but he is also the sweetest. Javier bought you a beautiful silver necklace with three gemstones in a line. “Oh Javier, it's beautiful.”

“It's each of our birthstones. Mine, yours, and Sofia’s. I just, I don’t know, thought it would be nice. To have something of our family for you to wear”

“That's so sweet Javi.” You trace the stones with your fingertips, “It’s just that, uhm…”

“What? What’s wrong? Is it the setting? We can change it. We can return it if you don’t like it Hermosa. What is it?” Javier immediately went into fixer mode. He always took it upon himself to fix any problem you had, even the imaginary ones.

“NO. No. Javier, I love it! It’s just that, well, we are going to need to add a stone, that's all.” You looked up at Javier trying to hold back your smile and the tears. Jesus Christ, you didn’t know you had any more tears left.

Javier’s eyebrows scrunched together as he tried to figure out just exactly what you said. He looked at the necklace then back at you and it dawned on him. “What? Wait. Are you serious?” He reached for your hands as a jubilant smile flickered across his face.

“Yes. I found out last month.” He couldn’t contain his excitement as dragged you into his arms and kissed your head, your cheek, your nose, your neck. You couldn’t help but giggle at his excitement. “I wanted it to be a surprise.”

“But…but you were drinking? You had champagne and…and cocktails at dinner.” Javier’s words were rushed. His hands were rubbing up and down your arms, it seemed to be soothing him more than it was you.

“Connie had the bartender make mocktails and give me sparkling cider.” You reached up and wiped the tears off of his cheek.

“We are having a baby?” Javier’s wide dark mahogany eyes pierced yours. The tears already threatening to overflow.

You wrapped your arms around his neck as he pulled you into his lap, “We are having a baby.”

Epilogue

Texas thunderstorms are a loud boisterous beast. The rumble of thunder shook the whole house and the cracks of lightning lit up the entire yard. The rain had been nonstop for the last couple of days. So much so that construction on yours Javier’s new home was put on hold until the weather subsided.

It was no worry though, Chucho loved having the house full of laughter and the thump of tiny little feet running around. Sofia definitely gives her Abuelo a run for his money, at just 4 and a half she is feisty as all hell and ALWAYS wants the last word. She has Chucho wrapped around her finger, and she knows it. Mateo is the opposite. He is the most soft-spoken and sensitive 2-year-old. Always trying to play peacemaker.

The rain drops beat against the kitchen window as you gather the marshmallows and steaming mugs of hot chocolate onto a tray. A new addition to the Peña family tradition of playing card games while it rains, hot cocoa, and playing out on the porch so you can sit and listen to the rain. Just like you did with your mom.

You balance the tray on your hip as you awkwardly try to open the screen door to the porch.

“Ay Mija, let me do that!” Chucho pulls Matteo off his lap and sets the book they were reading down. He grabs the tray from you and shoos you away. “Go on. Go, sit down.”

“Thank you, Chucho. I thought the third time would be easier but this one is doing jumping jacks on my kidneys I swear.” You lower yourself onto the porch swing, rubbing your belly absent-mindedly when you turn to Mateo and lift him onto your lap. “Are Papa and Sofia still yelling at each other?” You tickle his sides and his giggle erupts into the air. Mateo lays his head on your chest as you quietly hum and rub his back.

Javier and Sofia are competitive. She knows exactly how to rile him up. They have been playing go fish for an hour, and he has lost four times. You can’t help but laugh at the ridiculous sight of your husband arguing with your toddler about counting cards as if she is a card shark in a casino.

“Here Mateo, pero ten cuidado. It's hot.” Chucho hands Matteo a small mug he got for his birthday. Steve and Connie got it for him, or “Unca Steve” and “Auntie Wonnie” as Mateo calls them. It had brightly colored jellyfish on it and it was from the Florida Aquarium. Steve took Matteo there when he was a baby and he was obsessed with the jellyfish and has been ever since. When we told Steve and Connie that I was pregnant with Mateo, Steve campaigned hard for Steve Jr. He about tackled Javier to the ground in the hospital room when we told him Mateo’s middle name was Esteban.

“Are you two done fighting over there? Your hot chocolate’s gonna get cold.” You took a marshmallow and pelted it at Javier’s head.

“Ay! Hermosa, quit it!” Javier gathered the cards and Sofia ran up to Chucho for her cup. You laughed to yourself as she convinced him to give her extra marshmallows on the side because “it's always good to have a snack with your drink.”

Javier plopped down beside you and Mateo on the swing chewing away on his Nicorette gum. He went cold turkey in preparation for Mateo and hasn’t had one since. He slid his arm around your shoulders rubbing the back of your neck and he playfully tries to steal marshmallows out of Mateo’s mug.

Sofia, after shoving all the marshmallows in her mouth at once, crawls up into Javier’s lap to sip on her drink. Chucho finished divvying out the rest of the mugs to you and Javier before sitting down himself. A silence fell over the Peña household as the pattering of the rain and the rumble of thunder in the distance created a beautiful song.

This blissful moment reminds you of a poem that your mother would read to you at night during loud crashing thunderstorms.

The clouds are shedding tears of joy, They fall with rhythmic beat Upon the earth, and soon destroy Dust dunes and waves of heat.

Each falling drop enforcement bears To river, lake and rill, And sweet refreshment gladly shares With wooded dell and hill.

Every flower, bud and leaf, Each blossom, branch and tree Distills the rain, 'tis my belief, To feed the honey bee.

I pity every wretch I find Who, frowning in disdain, Is deaf and dumb and also blind To beauty in the rain.

Rain causes destruction. Rain causes chaos. It is loud and booming. But rain also creates beauty. Rain creates stillness. It is also soft and peaceful. To find the beauty in the rain you have to look deeper beyond the noise and chaos. Only then will you discover the beauty in the rain.

You and Javier have been through so much together. Colombia was a difficult time and then everything that happened after. It nearly destroyed you both. You fought and yelled and screamed. You hurt each other. But you did not give up on each other. Together you tried to find the beauty beyond the chaos of your lives. You forgave each other. You worked together to create the beautiful life you now live. It is not always easy. But you both show up every day for each other.

The airy, fresh scent of petrichor filled your nose as the rain droplets thrummed away on the roof of the porch. Javier leaned over and kissed your head as his free hand fell to your protruding stomach. The scene around you was beautiful and a treasure hard-won. A teary smile spreads across your face as you bask in the outpour of love that fills the porch and this home. This moment, this life, this family, Chucho, your children, Javier. They are your beauty in the rain. They are what makes the chaos and strife worth it. They cleanse away the dust and hurt of the past to make life beautiful and vibrant and full of laughter, light, and love. You have spent your whole life searching and now find comfort in the fact you have finally found your very own beauty in the rain.

Masterlist

Spanish Translations:

Mijo - My son

Mija - My daughter

Te amo - I love you

Tienes todo mi corazón y siempre lo tendrás - You have all my heart and always will

Hermosa - Beautiful

Mi Amor - My love

¿Buscas estos? - Looking for these?

Las cosas salieronien ya veo? - Things went well I see?

Sí. Sí, lo hicieron - Uh, yes. Yes, they did.

Realmente bien. ¿Dónde está Sofía? - Really well. Where is Sofia?

Dormido. Ni siquiera llegó a comulgar antes de desmayarse - Asleep. She didn't even get to communion before she passed out

Recuerda usar protección esta vez. No tenemos lugar para más sorpresas - Remember to use protection this time. We have no room for more surprises

Llos amores de su vida. - The loves of his life

Vamos - C’mon

Pero ten Cuidado - but be careful

Please let me know if any of the Spanish translations or usage is incorrect!!

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#javier pena x f!reader #javier pena x reader #javier peña x f!reader #Javier peña x reader #Javier Pena x female reader #Javier peña x female reader #angst #tw pregnancy mention #Pedro Pascal character fanfic #narcos fanfic #Javier Pena fanfic #Javier Peña fanfic #narcos

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cat-126 · 2 years

Text

>Hard to Love* ੈ✩‧₊˚

ʚĭɞೃ; Part 4: House visit

Summary: Y/N is in their Junior year taking sciences, and has been elected as the Class Procter for the current year, as Class Procter she must fullfill certain objectives, but what happens when she runs into someone who claims to know her from her past?

Warnings: Swearing

Story Notes: ignore the oct1 in yn tweet mitske jm so tited

♡> prev here next <♡

"I'm so tired..." Hutao, she was always late to class and this was the first thing she would say as soon as she arrived. The rest of the group had already arrived and were talking amongst theirselves but quickly went onto teasing Hutao on her tardiness. The class was filled with chatter but quickly dispersed as Mr.Zhongli started his lesson.

"Ehm, class as you may remember last lesson, I arranged you in pairs for your upcoming assignment, I suggest you start working on it now because it is worth 25% of your grade."

"25%?! On just a poem!?"

Childe and his stupid big mouth.

Mr.Zhongli sighed deeply and looked at Childe with a deadpan face, "Yes, Mr.Ajax 25%.. and it is not just a poem, there is more behind it..the stotic woman silently in her aching heart expresses his deep love for.."

Thanks Childe, now Mr.Zhongli is going to explain the poem to us for the 10th time this week.

Y/N and Scaramouche were now in pairs sitting in silence staring down at their tables, there was a awkward silence. "So.." Y/N looked up to Scaramouche tapping his finger on the table while his head was on his hand. "..." 'What the hell do I say..?'

"Do you have your laptop?"

"Uh..no its getting repaired"

"I'll take mine out, one sec"

You took your laptop out of your bag, sliding it out of her light pink colored foam laptop case. "Hah, you still like pink?" "Ofcourse..? who cannot its a good color!" you looked at his with one of your eyebrows raised, "What are you 5 years old?" He looked at Y/N with a smirk , head still on his hand., "Haha very funny Scara." you spoke with a flat tone and looked back at your laptop to turn it on.

-♡

Scaramouche POV >< :

With eyebrows slightly raised he thought, 'Scara?.. so she does remember me..I wonder why she acts as if she doesn't but I wont ply..'

Y/N quickly typed in her password and opened a word document, she took a second to think and labeled it, "Y/N and Scara assignment."

"Do you atleast have the book?"

"Hm? Oh yeah" quickly searching through his bag he pulled out the book and handed it.

"Have you read the poem yet?" Y/N spoke as she looked down at the page.

"...Yeah but, I didn't pay attention to that garbage."

"Hah, don't let Mr.Zhongli hear you" Y/N spoke while looking up with a smile, then looked down to focus on the words.

Y/N and Scaramouche took turns typing in points they understood from the poem, it was a lazy attempt to seem busy but atleast it worked for now.

While Y/N was typing, Scaramouche tapped her shoulder and said, "We won't be able to finish the beggining draft in a week if we're only gonna be able to work in class" Y/N looked up at Scaramouche, "We can meet up at my place? Plus its the weekend tomorrow, you should be free ,right?" 'I could go but, mom might not allow..'

"Hmm.. how about my place instead?"

Scaramouche took a second to think, "Can't, I have to take care of my sister." 'oh'

"Well, i'll talk to my parents about it.."

"You know you're gonna need a way to contact me to tell me about it, whats your number?"

"Right! one sec" Y/N ripped a random piece of paper, wrote her number and handed it back.

"Hm, tell me what they say, bye" he packed up his things and went back to his table. 'How will I convince them'

School was finally over and the weekend was here, you were about to flop down on your bed, hoping to relax a bit after school and talking with your parents but, you were interupted by a ding! sound.

"Ughhh!" 'Just when the weekend came...'

Standing infront of his door, your run the bell. Ding Dong! 'Why am I so nervous..' As soon as you rung the bell, a loud voice was heard from inside.

"KUNIKUZUSHI!! Get down here this instant!!"

"AUGH! IM COMING ONE SECOND!!"

'What..'

All of the sudden the door bust open, It was a woman? She had dark purple hair and seemed as if she was getting ready to go somewhere.

"Ah, Hello, you must be Kunis' friend, please come inside" She had a sweet voice and gestured you to come inside.

Slightly nodding your head with a smile you greeted her, "Hello Aunty" and went inside. She responded to you with a friendly smile and told you that she would go get "Kunikuzushi".

You were awkwardly standing inside, infront of the door not sure what to do with your shoes, or yourself. You didnt sit anywhere, not wanting to seem rude. His house was really nice. The place had a cozy, warm feeling to it and seemed quite comfortable. There were a few antiques here and there but not too many to the point it would seem tacky, just the right amount.

You were pulled out of your thoughts about his abode by bickering, and babbles. You ignored them because it wasn't any of your business. Suddenly, you heard feet hitting the floor.

"NOOO!!" A small baby with little pigtails and a pink dress, quickly ran from behind the corner and hid under the table. "KANA GET BA-aackk heere...." Then Scaramouche emerged from the corner but quickly stopped as soon as he saw you. He was wearing a black hoodie and baggy jeans and was looking at you with pure embarassment.

"Oh..ehm.. give me a second.." "Oh, its okay..take your time" he quitely, nervously went to pick up the whiny baby and went back. '...What do i do?'

A voice quickly pulled you out of your thoughts, "Hey ehm,I was uh busy sorry, you can come sit here." He patted the table and awkwardly looked down, scratching his cheek. "Haha, yeah I could tell you were busy it's okay, uhm where do I put my shoes?" "J-Just put them right there" You placed your shoes aside and put your things on the table as you sat down.

"Wait, let me go get my laptop" Really?

Here you were again, sitting in silence..and awkwardness. Suddenly you felt a tap on your knee, you looked down and saw a small black cat with a purple collar meow at you.

'He has a cat!?!' It was safe to that you adored cats, maybe even obsessed over them.

Smiling like a idiot, you were a bit afraid to touch the cat incase it would bite you but, it seemed friendly by the way it was rubbing it's cheek on your knee. As soon as you scratched it's head, it started purring. 'Cute'

You heard a cough, "Mewo, that's her name" You looked up at him with a smile, he was carrying his laptop and a pencil pouch, "Oh, that name sounds familiar... she's cute" When you looked back down the cat had ran away, how selfish...

He sat down, putting his things on the tabke while turning his laptop, "C'mon let's get sta-"

"Awh! Kuni is this your friend?" It was a woman, a different one, she had floral pink hair and also seemed as if she was going somewhere. You waved at her with a smile, you were about to greet her but were cut of by a gasp.

"Awh honey aren't you Y/N!?, It's been soo so long how are you?" She spoke very happily and gave you a light squeeze on your cheek.

'I can't say no to her, that would seem rude..'

"Hah, yes Aunty, I'm good!"

"Please, if you need anything! Do tell Kuni, I and Baal won't be avalible today, sorry hun"

"Oh? It's okay, really i'll manage!"

"Well, study hard you two!" She waved and went behind the corner.

"Even after so many years.. she babies you too much.."

"Jealous much?" You gave him a teasing smile and laughed it off.

Baal and Yae had left a while ago, leaving Kana in the care of you two.

"What the fuck?" You both couldn't understand ANYTHING, the poem was all over the place. "This chick needs to get her feelings straight, god damn" Scaramouche seemed genuinelly angry and dissapointed at the fictional woman.

After taking another look at the sentence you both were stuck at you said, "I think it's about her not being able to accept her feelings for him because shes scared of what he thinks about her.." He looked at you in disbelief, "Okay shakespeare" and started snickring a bit. "Wooww, thanks"

While working you both kept jokingly teasing each other on the smallest things, sometimes about how you held your pencil or how he looked at the book like a idiot trying to decipher the text.

As you were studying the text, someone shook your arm, It was the baby. She had a light pink night suit and held a stuffie in her arm. Her eyes were slightly swollen and red from how sleepy she was.

"Hiii!" Even though she was on the verge of sleeping , she still had a wide smile on her face.

'She's adorable!'

Looking down at her with a soft smile you spoke, "Awee hii!, whats your n-"

"Kana, why are you awake, you know its your nap time" Scaramouche had his head on his hand as he started down at Kana.

"But, I.. I wanna talk to your friend.." She looked down while fidgeting with the hem of your shirt.

You looked at her with a empathetic face and lightly ruffled her hair, "Awh c'mon Scara let her stay she's so cute!" Kana looked up at him with a false pout, pleading him to let her stay as she clung to your clothes. "Look how sad she is.." You looked at him with a fake dissapointed face while holding Kana close to you.

"Seriously Y/N..? Fine..but you better not touch anything Kana."

Kana was jumping happily, "YAAAY! ,Okaay I won't touch anyyyytthingggg! PINKIE PROMISE!" she ran up to Scaramouche holding her pinky out.

"Im not 3 years old"

"Pleaseee?!"

He reluctantly held out his pinky and linked it with hers, he had a slight smile on his face which he was trying to hide. Suddenly he looked back when he heard a small click!

"Y/N..delete that."

"Whyy? it's so cute look!" You showed him the picture, Kana was smiling with stars in her eyes as she held out her pinky while Scaramouch held out his with a reluctant smile.

"It's not cute."

"I'm gonna have to show this to your mom"

"Oh you wouldn't.." He grabbed the table and squinted his eyes while staring at you.

You copied his pose,"Oh I would.." Your faces were close but still had a gap between.

"Oh excuse us!"

Oh. It was Miko and Baal...

"Kuni I thought it was a study session ..not a date" Miko looked at him with a teasing smile while Baal had her hand on her hip. The both of you stood up from your seat in a panic.

"MOM. IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK!!"

"Y-YES AUNTY WE WERE JUST..HOW DO I EXPLAIN IT?!" You held Scaramouches shoulders and shook them.

"STOP SHAKING ME DAMMIT AND SHUT UP, WE...we were just uhh"

"Hahaha, you two don't need to panic i'm just joking, I know you weren't about to kis-"

"Don't. Just don't even say it." Scaramouche had his head in his hand, looking down, while you were trying to cover your flushed cheeks from being embarassed.

"Ha anyways, Y/N dear would you like anything to drink? I can tell you haven't had anything even after I told someone to make sure you have atleast something.." Baal spoke as she turned her head towards Scaramouche, who was still dying of embarassment. "Let me get you something, anything"

"No Aunty, it's okay don't troub-"

"I insist." She didn't look scary but, right now..she for sure did..

"Ah uhm.. anything really..." You could hear Scaramouche let out a small giggle at your nerviousness, to which you reaponded by staring at him with a deadpan face.

"Hm...Tea it is! Give me a minute dear, i'll be right back"

"Oh, thankyou Aunty, do you need any help?"

"Ha, you're too sweet, you're our guest so please sit, Kuni you come here and help me this is your punishment for not treating her with proper hospitality..tch tch"

You looked at Scaramouche with a teasing smile and whispered "Sucks to suck" to which he told you to, "Fuck off"

The table you two were sitting on was right beside the kitchen, you could see Baal and Scaramouche make tea while Kana showed you random drawings she made.

"Y/N!! look I drew Kuni!!" It was a angry stickman outside in a garden ,the sun she drew had sunglasses and a smile. It looked wonky but it was oddly cute.

"Awe cute! you're such an artist aren't you?" you motivated her with a smile, she really was just adorable.

You looked up to see what was happening in the kitchen. He was helping his mom make tea and put some cookies on a delicate plate. It didn't seem as if he was being forced, he seemed ..quite content actually. He was always serious so it felt nice to see him brighter than usual. And honestly, he looked pretty good today..

'he isn't THAT bad I suppose..' a smile crept on your face, luckly no one noticed it. Phew!

TagList: @beriiov

Comment that you wanna be added if you want to be put in the tag list! ^^

A/N: bro its fucjing 3:41 AM im at my aunts house IN A WHOLE DIFF ASS CITY. im so fucjing tired i swear to my fucking god i swear on my fucking life, my dignity, my money, my parents, everythung that if this post gets shadowbannes you will never hear from me ever fucjing again I will kill myself. LOL anyays hope u enoy ??!11?!1!11

#genshin fanfic #genshin imagines #genshin impact fluff #genshin scenarios #genshin smau #genshin drabbles #scaramouche smau #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche #cymil ♡

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madaboutmunson · 2 years

Text

The Eddie Munson Tape Dates - Dio - Holy Diver

Warnings: Drug use, lasers, swearing, kisses

You rip another piece of paper from your notebook, screw it up and throw it in the waste paper basket next to your desk.

Eddie looks up at you from his side of the dual desk set-up in your room, "You need some help, babe? Is it the poetry assignment?"

You nod and start tapping the end of your pencil against your forehead again, glaring at the fresh blank piece of lined paper.

You peer over on Eddie's side of the desk. He has at least four different poems written out. He covers them over with his arm and shoos you away. You sigh and fall back in your chair, slumping down in it.

Why was it so difficult? You just needed to write a poem. It wasn't even a specific theme. It could be anything, any style. So, you think to yourself, that is probably part of the problem. The assignment was too vague.

Eddie is still scribbling away opposite you. You peer over again, "Is that number five?" You say jealously.

"You know, you can have one of mine if you like?" He raises his eyebrows at you from under his curls, his mouth turning up into a smile because he already knows your answer. After all, it's always the same when it comes to homework.

"I can't do that, Eddie. I'll know it's not my work, and so will they!" You complain as you throw your notepad and pencil into the bin.

"It can't be that bad, babe. We listen to music all the time. It's just like lyrics, you know. A story that rhymes." Eddie reaches into the bin retrieving your notepad, pencil and one of the screwed-up pieces of paper.

He unravels the paper ball to read its contents. It has a list of scribbled-out words, most describing things around you in your room. Book. Pen. Window. Paper. Finally, Eddie's name in tiny bubble lettering, with a heart dotting the 'i'.

You look at him, hopefully.

"Well", he starts, "It looks to me like you've hit a wall. Your inspiration is lost. Maybe you could write something about me? You always write me such nice things in those origami dragons, babe." He encourages

"Are you actually losing your mind? You want me to write something about you, for school?? No, babe. That's... well... it's private." As quickly as you reject his answer, you start contemplating it just so you might have something written. It's not like you didn't have a notebook half full of it already, anyway. You wait a few seconds before pretending to look for something, when really you were checking that the Eddie notebook was still in the secret drawer compartment, along with its other personal things and Eddie memorabilia.

"Maybe do a bit of other work and come back to it", Eddie suggests kindly with an encouraging smile as you snap the drawer shut.

You resist the unconstructive urge to let him know you've already done that...three times already...you just nod and start searching the room and out the window for inspiration, which is currently manifesting as a very bland list of nouns on your paper, until Eddie finishes his own homework.

It was tough to harbour any resentment towards him when he was doing so well. Your own parents and Wayne had obviously observed that you and Eddie were virtually inseparable but had set one rule. They would not intervene or complain about who stayed where or how much time you spent together, as long as grades didn't slip. What they hadn't anticipated was grades actually improving.

Eddie often attributed his scholarly improvements to this rule and your encouragement. Maybe in the beginning, yes, but now? This was all Eddie. He was, as you had suspected all along, extremely bright. He was pushing to the top of his class subjects in which he was just getting by. The ones he was failing, he was averaging. The praise from these successes only fueled Eddie's motivation. He was well on his way to graduating, and it was all his own hard work.

You hid a smile of pride as you looked at him again. A glance that turned to a stare because this was another favourite Eddie of yours. Eddie in the creative zone.

Whether it was him noodling on his guitar, creating encounters for the Hellfire club's next session, drawing out the set for the latest school production, or simply his homework, they all brought this Eddie out.

His widened eyes focused on the paper, his arm moving quickly from one side of the pad to the other, the frantic scratching of a pencil or pen, one spare sitting behind his ear, poking out through his curls. The frantic writing caused his mane of hair to sway gently as he worked. One side of his mouth slightly curled upwards to indicate his pleasure in being on a roll. Particularly intense moments of focus could be detected when the tip of his tongue would appear and press down hard on his top lip for a while.

A soft rasp emerges from the animated portrait, "I sure hope you are staring at me for inspiration, sweetheart." You see the smile on his face widen, but he doesn't look up and continues to work for a few seconds more before punctuating his work with a forceful full stop and slamming his pencil down.

"Aaaaand done," he says, leaning backwards on the back two legs of the chair, stretching his arms up behind his head, his t-shirt riding up a little as he does.

"Perv!" He laughs, pursing his lips at you in mock annoyance.

"Come on, let's see what you've got on that pad", he beckons you over to his lap, and honestly, it's a welcome distraction from this pit of incompetence.

He reads over the pad, "Ok, well, you've listed a lot of objects here, babe" he sighs, "Whilst I appreciate the "So pretty" comment written here, it's not really helping you link lamp and compass together, is it now?" He looks up at you. You can tell he is flattered. He's never quite got over being called pretty or beautiful. He could deal with hot, smokin', gorgeous, handsome, but some of the more delicate adjectives just made him crumble.

And he did. Crumble, that is. When you sat down, he'd tried to be helpful tutor Eddie, encouraging and finding you little inlets back into the task, but that complement, had sucker punched teacher Eddie right out of the window.

He throws the pad onto the desk, his arm tightens around you, and he looks up at you adoringly, then slightly squints his eyes a little, and he says softly, "You know what you need...you need to open. Your. mind." With each of those last three words, he gently taps his finger on the tip of your nose, "Let that inspiration flood in, babe."

Eddie reaches into his vest pocket, hanging on the back of his chair, pulling out two tapes and fanning them in his hands at you.

Your eyes flit between the two, "It's gotta be Dio. We had Sabbath last time", you say, tapping the case gently.

"Your wish is my command, My Lady," he says tenderly, lifting his chin up towards you, trying and succeeding to capture your gaze with his own.

The quality control department between your brain and mouth goes out to lunch, leaving no one at the controls, "I've missed you this week, Eddie. Like, so very, very much", you say, gently stroking his hair and side of his face, until your hand is in range. Then, without breaking eye contact, he kisses your palm.

"And I you, my sweet. It's only one more week. I promise. Besides, I'm here right now, aren't I?" He says, wrapping his other arm around you also.

You nod and link your arms behind his neck, "You sure are, live and in the flesh, not just the other end of a telephone line" you smile at him and kiss him gently, "I love you, Eddie Munson."

He smiles at you, "I know", he says, as his smile transforms into a roguish smirk.

"Eddie, you know I don't like that," you whine at him and then suddenly look to the window shaking your fist, and shout ", Fuckin' star wars!"

He gives you a dramatic performance of shock and incredilousness, " You're just gonna condemn a whole trilogy, like that? "

"Yeah, yeah, I am!" You say defiantly, furrowing your brow sweetly.

He rolls his eyes at you, "Fine!!" Then, he moves his hands from around your waist and grabs your face, repeatedly planting kisses on it, followed by an "I love you", each in a different accent or tone.

It is only when a particular 'I love you' comes in a questioning tone, do you decide it's enough, "Alright, that'll do it", you announce, getting up from his lap.

He stands up with you, "I just need to make a quick call, and then we'll get going, ok?" He looks you over, "Make sure you are wearing something comfortable, alright...dress for variable temperatures."

After selecting Jeans, a cami and a sweater, you head downstairs to an interesting sight.

Eddie is rolling at the table, your Dad is at the stereo dancing to Steppenwolf, and your Mom has her coat on and keys in her hand.

Eddie walks over to your Dad and puts a joint behind his ear, "Take it easy with that, Pops", he says, laughing and joins in with a bit of a dance.

" 'ow do lass," your Dad says in his thick Yorkshire accent as he spots you looking very confused.

"Greetings, weirdos. Can anyone direct me back to the reality I was just in, please?" Then, you say, confused, "Has everyone decided to swap roles...or.....?"

"Sunbeam was saying about your creativity being blocked, darling, and when he said where you were going, I just mentioned that it can be more fun with a bit of...er...herbal assistance. Like when your Dad and I used to go. Of course, then, it wasn't all fancy like it is now. It was just art films," your Mom says before quickly hurrying into the kitchen and throwing some juice boxes and candy bars into a fabric cross-body bag before walking over to you and draping the strap around you.

"What? The-" you start before Eddie walks over and links his arm in yours.

"We're ready, Mama. Thanks so much for playing Taxi," he says gratefully to your Mom.

"No trouble at all; it was very responsible of you to ask, dear," your Mom says, getting in the driver's seat whilst you and Eddie pile in the back.

"So where exactly are we going?" You nudge Eddie excitedly.

"We are going to open your mind, babe," he says, buckling in himself, then you and draping his arm around you.

Your Mom looks back at Eddie in the rearview mirror as you set off. "Let's not overindulge, though, shall we? This is a trust exercise too. Is that clear?" She eyes both of you seriously.

You both nod solemnly in response to the unusually stern tone from your Mom.

"I do not want Wayne thinking us irresponsible. We're proving fun can be had within safety parameters, right?" She looks back at you both again, "I'll have enough to deal with your father later", she laughs.

The road winds round and round, and looking out of the window, Hawkins gets smaller and smaller. This route seems familiar to you, and you think about it for a few minutes, "The planetarium!!" You shout out, making everyone else in the car jump.

"Je-sus!" Eddie exclaims, clutching his chest, "Yes, fuck, the planetarium. Geez"

You let out a squeal of excitement. Your Mom smiles at you in the rearview mirror.

"Wait, what does the planetarium do with art films?"

You ask enthusiastically.

"Moonbeam, you're almost there. Don't you want a nice surprise?" You Mom says gently, in an attempt to calm you down.

"I guess," you say in an almost disgusted tone. Making Eddie and your Mom laugh at your inability to not try and solve the mystery before you get there.

You pull up round the back of the domed building with the night sky as a blanket twinkling around it.

Eddie grabs his lunchbox and knocks a rhythmic pattern on the door. You recognise it but can't quite place it.

The door opens, and you see a clean-cut-looking guy with a short cropped hairstyle, clean-shaven, wearing a pale button-down and blue jeans, "Eddie, my man!" He says, instigating a choreographed handshake with Eddie, then looks over at you.

"Oh...Eddie," the man says, his eyes welling up a little as he looks between the two of you, "I just knew it...I really did...I knew it when you were out on the ice."

"Wait! Bob??!! Is that you?" You say absolutely astounded. This guy hardly looked anything like Bob from the arena. Your eyes scan him over quickly, and looking at his kind, smiling, tear-filled eyes, the two of them merge in your mind, "Wow, you look so...so..." You start searching for the right words.

"Different?" Bob offers, and you nod.

"Well, you know that night after the ice performance...which I didn't get a chance to tell you, was beautifully timed to the music, by the way...I thought to myself, I want that for me. How can Bob make that happen?" Bob grabs Eddie by the shoulder, pulling him over to him in a side embrace, "This guy let me talk his ear off a bunch of times during deliveries, and you know I...well, I met someone...I say met...I've seen her around...she's so beautiful...I doubt she remembers me from school, but who knows, right? So I made some changes, but none that change who I am as a person, just a few that might make someone like her look my way, maybe."

You smile broadly at Bob, "I'm sure it's gonna happen for you, Bob. Someone with as much love to give as you, she'd be a fool not to really."

Bob grins, "You know I recall saying something not too dissimilar to someone a couple of months back. Thank you for your good wishes. I'll keep you in the loop" he winks and points a finger gun at you, "Anyway...shall we?" Bob steps back and gestures for you and Eddie to enter. Eddie passes a significantly smaller bag to Bob than the last time you saw this interaction.

You turn back and wave goodbye to your Mom as you head inside. Bob gives you a little tour, pointing out the smoking room, the toilets, and the snack machines before you all finally arrive in the main room.

"I've reserved you some seats over there." He waves to a set of seats near the centre of the room next to the aisle. The reservation markers are two big pink paper love hearts. You smile as Eddie pinches the bridge of his nose, saying, "Thank you, Bob. I'm sure we could have found them easily enough with a letter and number and the fact no one else is here."

Bob looks Eddie dead in the eyes, "Oh, I know you could have. I just like making it special, you know?" Bob smiles back, and it's apparent that Bob actually enjoys winding up Eddie in the sweetest ways possible, though.

"So do you wanna take it for a spin, see how you feel and then go for a smoke? Or smoke first and get your minds blown by carefully coded and intricately woven laser beams?" Bob claps his hands together excitedly.

"Well, it's up to you, babe. I'm happy either way," Eddie says, holding your hand.

"Because I don't know what is going to happen, I'd like a test run first, please, Bob," you say, the excitement building in your stomach.

"Alrighty lovely, I'll get right on it," Bob says, disappearing behind a curtained off desk.

Eddie escorts you to your seat as the lights go down, and as he tries to sit down immediately jumps out of his seat and grabs at something wedged in it. Eddie, freshly awash with dread, shuts his eyes, gingerly grabs for it, and reopens one of his eyes a little.

He pulls an unamused face, holding the object aloft, shouting at Bob, "Really?". Eddie drops into his seat with a playful thud, examining the obstruction. It's a plushy of Saturn holding a tag saying, "You're out of this World!"

He smiles at it and hands it over to you, "I believe this was planted for you, on my behalf", he says happily.

"Thank you, Bob!!" You shout over to him. You see a thumbs-up poke out from the side of the curtain.

The lights go down again, and you hear a faint hum. You look over at Eddie; he is already leaning his head back, looking at the ceiling. You feel slightly confused, but copy him and cling to the little planet in your lap.

The first note of 'For What It's Worth' by Buffalo Springfield rings out, and as it does, a flash of yellow light appears above you like a singular expanding star. On the next string pluck, another, and this repeats, but they move around the ceiling, appearing in different spaces.

Then a hexagon appears on the screen but then seems to spin around in the air. Its vibrant colours and smooth movement make you feel like you could reach out and touch it.

"Whoa" is all you can quietly muster.

You feel Eddie move closer to you. You turn your eyes towards him for a moment and realise he's watching both the ceiling and your reactions intermittently.

Bob creates more shapes, textures, and motion as the song progresses using the lasers. Things that looked like nebula or sound waves moving around the ceiling in the darkness.

"Oh, Rainbow in the Dark", you whisper, not taking your eyes away from the light show.

"That's the one, babe", Eddie whispers back.

As the song comes to a close, the images become more layered. It's a feast for the eyes.

The lights come up a little but are not fully on. Bob pokes his head out from the curtain, "Well? What do you think."

You stand up from your seat, giving an enthusiastic round of applause, "How did you do that? Is it like a movie"

"Hmm, not really," Bob says, waving you over.

You rush over to see behind the scenes and find Bob at a desk, just a mass of dials and buttons.

"Holy shit", you exclaim, "what is all this?"

"These are all the things that control the laser, its direction, what it passes through, filters, mirrors, and knowing how those all work together, you can make shapes and movement", Bob explains it like it's the simplest thing on the planet.

"Wow, so it's not like a slide projector, then?" You venture

"Oh no, I'm creating this stuff in real-time. Wanna take it for a spin?" You look over the massive amount of controls and feel well and truly daunted.

"You know, something's are just better left to the professionals", you smile back at him.

"Besides, " Eddie adds, "We aren't just on a date tonight, Sir Bob. We're on a mission. One of creativity and inspiration. Not one where you hire a new laserist" Eddie raises a bag of pre-rolls, shakes it and sticks his tongue out.

Bob chuckles, "But of course, to the smoking room, tout suite!"

As you enter, the big fluorescent overhead lights of the room are almost unbearable after sitting in the dim lights for so long. Bob busies himself, switching on many Lava lamps of all different shapes and sizes dotted around the room. You notice how cosy it is: giant soft pillows, bean bags, crocheted cushion covers, and big blankets.

"Do you bring people back here often, Bob?" You say, looking around at the stack of books on the coffee table.

"Oh no," he laughs, "This room just gets me in the right mindset, you know?". You nod.

Eddie has already made himself at home, lighting up and reclining in a bean bag that looks like it's almost trying to swallow him whole because of how he threw himself into it.

You spend the next 45 minutes or so hanging out and smoking with Bob and Eddie.

Bob is asking you questions about how you met and what the other tape dates were like.

In exchange, Bob explains how Rick used to deliver to him, but then Eddie took over.

"Well, you see, Bob", a slightly heavy-lidded Eddie starts, "Rick appreciated your custom, but every time he showed up, you were crying, and he, like, couldn't deal with it. So when he sent me, I just, like, you know, I asked why he was upset, and we got to talking, just like hit it off."

Bob smiles gently over at Eddie, "Indeed, and I'm so glad that happened because otherwise, I wouldn't be where I am now, you know? You ever think about that how one small change in your past could have blown you off course completely?!!" Bob expresses curiously.

" Yeah, like if my hair had behaved, I might not have met Y/N", Eddie giggles grabbing one of his curls, "Thanks, hair!"

"Yeah, but it goes even further back than that...if I hadn't eaten a spinach puff, I wouldn't have been looking in the mirror," You say, running your tongue over your teeth.

"And if those two people hadn't fallen in love, neither of you would have been at the wedding," Bob adds.

"It makes you think about how much of anything is actually in our control, you know?" Eddie says profoundly, "like, are we just G.I. Joe's for the gods

"G.I. Joe's??" Bob sounds offended, "Not me. I'm a superman for sure. What about you?"

They both look at you, waiting patiently, "A strawberry shortcake doll? "

Bob nods, "Yeah, that absolutely makes sense. I could see that"

Eddie laughs so hard that no sound comes from his mouth, "A strawberry shortcake doll? Why?" He eventually manages to ask.

"Why not? I'd always smell fantastic, and I'd have a companion. What's not to want?" You say with a scoff.

Eddie fights his way out of the bean bag to get over to you, "You already have those things, babe."

"Oh yeah, well, you know what, bad guys would see Superman and G.I. Joe coming from miles away. They'd never suspect Strawberry Shortcake and my little stealth cat Custard, never."

Eddie sits himself on your lap and rubs the tip of his nose side to side against your own, "So very, very true." He pulls away slightly, examining your face, "You know Bob, I think we're ready for round two."

You all make your way back into the main room. Bob returns to his desk, and you and Eddie go back to your seats. You happily watch different displays for different songs, amazed at each one, the slow, soft, heavy sensations moving over your person, how your head swims into the universe of lights above you.

It suddenly feels like it isn't enough, as if your seat prevented you from the entire experience or something. You get up from it and go sit in the aisle. You take off your sweater as a makeshift pillow and lie back on the floor.

Your eyes and neck are no longer straining to see, and the music reverberations pulse through the floor and right through you. You outstretch your hand towards the ceiling and, for a moment, feel like an intrinsic part between the music and the lights, but something isn't quite right.

"Oh shit! There you are. I thought you felt I'll or something, babe. He immediately takes off his vest and jacket. His jacket behind his own head, his vest he props behind you as if your sweater couldn't possibly be doing a good enough job.

The sensation of his skin next to yours and the scents that waft around you as your head hits the jacket make you smile. That's all that was missing. Just Eddie.

You slink your hand into his and continue to watch the show together. Occasional moments of complete awe, some uncontrollable giggles, and some of the softest, gentlest touches you've ever exchanged.

This was perfect. He was perfect. What exactly were you waiting for?

You glance over at him and then quickly back at the ceiling,

"Eddie?" You say, elongating the end 'e' of his name.

"Mmm hmm," he hums, still watching the action on the ceiling.

"I wanted to ask you something," you say, wiggling over to him a bit more and squeezing his hand a little.

"Ok," he says neutrally, eyes dancing around the dome of the false night sky above you as the light my fire comes to an end.

"Well, I was wondering...." You begin before you are interrupted by him tapping your arm.

"Is this question urgent because if not, the ceiling requires your attention, babe?" he says, pointing upwards.

"No...no...it's not urgent," you say quietly and give your full attention to the ceiling.

"Look, look," he says in a quietened excitement as a new song starts.

On one side of the ceiling is a light blue star-type shape, and on the right, another but a sunset orange colour.

You watch as the stars move around through different forms, and though sharing the same space, they never collide.

A golden rectangle appears, the blue star on its left side and the yellow on its right.

The stars finally collide and circle around one another like wisps. Their spiral goes around and around and increases speed until it explodes into a flower.

The stars return, tiny at first, closer together this time, but they grow from stars to circles. From circles to a crescent moon and a blazing sun.

They move towards one another again, this time overlapping until the moon fits snuggly in the sun. New circular waves ripple out from them and pulse out into the darkness around them.

You smile and tilt your head slightly onto Eddie's shoulder before the pictures in front of you disappear, and the lights go back up to dimmed once again.

Eddie turns on his side to you, "So, did you like that one too?" He asks softly.

You also turn on your side to him and bump noses because you misjudge the space between you, causing a little ripple of giggles.

"Yes, I very much did. That was so nice of Bob to put that together. That lady sure is in for a treat with Romance Bob on the case." You say, gesturing at the curtain.

Eddie gives you a big dimpled smile and taps you on the tip of your nose a few times, "See, that's where you are wrong", he adds in a sing-song voice, "Bob made it happen, sure, but he didn't choreograph that piece. I did. I wrote it. So in a way, you're the lucky lady."

"Well, I already knew that. You know, if I told someone at school about all these things, they'd never believe me. Never believe that the Satanic Cult Leader is more like a Big Softie Cult Leader" You grab for the little Saturn Plushie and give it to him. "You know what, Eddie, *You're* out of the world, out of this galaxy, out of this universe."

"Well, you both need to be out of this planetarium because I think your mom is parked outside, " Bob interrupts.

You grab your things quickly and give Bob a hug of thanks, "Truly amazing stuff, Bob, hope that woman is the one", you say as you both rush out of the building into the parking lot.

"Good night", you yell back at Bob as you both get into the back seat.

"Hey Mama, sorry about that hope you weren't waiting long." You offer as you get buckled in, Eddie gently squeezing the plush of Saturn in his hands, smiling happily out of the window.

"Not all moonbeam. Did you have a good time?" She asks. Her expression, which you can see in the mirror, clearly already knows the answer.

"Oh, yeah. It was so good. You'd love it. You and Dad should go. It's just so beautiful." You enthuse at her, your hands animated.

"Your Father is currently sleeping like a baby, so I don't think I'll be able to ask him when we get back, but I'll make a note of it. You sound excited enough about it all. Do you feel inspired, though?" She says, smiling happily.

"Yeah, do you think you've got a poem in you now?" Eddie asks, holding your hand and brushing his thumb along the side of it.

"I think this might be an evening that launched a thousand poems. I've already written part of one, but it's all up here," you say, tapping the side of your head.

"What's it about?" He asks, mildly impressed.

"Erm...I guess... everything?" You say, grinning lovingly at him.

"How are you gonna write a poem about everything?" He laughs his adorable dorky laugh.

"You'll see, My love. You'll see," you say, gently kissing him.

Laser show example if you wanna join in :) obviously big warning for flashing lights!!!!

youtube

#eddie munson #stranger things #eddiemunson #eddie stranger things #eddie the freak munson #stranger things fanfiction #fanfiction #eddie x reader #eddie munson fanfic #romance #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson / reader #madaboutmunson #theeddiemunsontapedates #fire au

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ablatheringblatherskite · 8 months

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4, 10, 20, 135? :)

AAAAAHHH YAYY, thank you so much for the ask, Teaspoon (can I call u that?? Or do u have a better nickname suggestion!)!! So sorry it took a bit, I was trying to PERFECT this answer LOL (the book recc part especially took me a bit HAHA)

4. A poetry book that reads like a story

I think I'm gonna have to say When We Were Very Young and Now We Are Six by A.A. Milne!! I absolutely adore those poem books aaaaaaaa, I left them in our other home and I miss it so muchhh. I'm not sure if the question means all poems are connected or each poem feels like a story on its own, to me they really feel like the latter. They're so cute and beautiful and charming and nostalgic and agghhhhh

here's some of my favorites, just to name two of many:

and

Wind On The Hill

No one can tell me, Nobody knows, Where the wind comes from, Where the wind goes.

It’s flying from somewhere As fast as it can, I couldn’t keep up with it, Not if I ran.

But if I stopped holding The string of my kite, It would blow with the wind For a day and a night.

And then when I found it, Wherever it blew, I should know that the wind, Had been going there too.

So then I could tell them Where the wind goes… But where the wind comes from Nobody knows.

10. A book that got you through something

Okay this is a toughie, but only because I can't remember any specific times. BUT BOOKS HAVE ALWAYS AND FOREVER WILL HELP ME GET THROUGH A LOT OF DIFFICULT THINGS!

BUT one book that I am sure has helped me through SOME difficult things is Inkheart by Cornelia Funke. That's honestly one of my main comfort books ever since I was like, ten years old. Some people consider it to be slow but I think that's why I love it 🥺. It really takes time to depict the more mundane, realistic moments in between the high-stakes, perilous ones in their adventure. It's really about the ENTIRE journey, and I really love that

20. A book that got you out of a reading slump

I think one book that ripped me FIERCELY out of a reading slump was Wings of Fire, book 6: Moon Rising. I absolutely LOVE the Wings of Fire series (it's no surprise that it's about dragons LOL. I... love dragons...), and I'll be honest after finishing the first quartet I was skeptical about continuing to the next part of the series just because it ended so well, but I was NOT DISAPPOINTED. Disclaimer: I have yet to find a copy of book seven... BUT CAN'T WAIT FOR WHEN I FINALLY DO 😭

135. Recommend any book you like!

oh GOSH THERE'S SO MANY TO CHOOSE FROM. UMMM. Alright I have two!

Okay so there's Inkheart by Cornelia Funke, a REALLY underrated book imo that I love so much, that I think you'd like if you like fantasy and adventure that takes place in the real world. I don't know if COZY is the right word for it but it'd really cozy to me even if they characters are often in danger lol, but I think the biggest reason I love it so much is because it's a real love letter to books and reading (and even writing as well!). It's about a book binder and his daughter, and the book binder has the ability to read characters from books to life. I read it when I was ten and have loved it ever since.

Then there's the Wings of Fire quartet by Tui T. Sutherland, which I ABSOLUTELY LOVE TO THIS DAY. If you love dragons and fantasy, then you'd probably like this!!! Yeah it's a children's book but who CARES. This book series is about five dragonets who have been told all their life that they are destined to stop the Sandwing queen war, and their journey as they try to do exactly that. The world-building is so cool, with the different type of dragons, and I love the five main characters so much and their relationship with each otherrrrr. Seriously one of my favorite series ever.

ANYWAY IM SORRY AGAIN FOR THE LATE RESPONSE!! I've been thinking about this ask for days I swear thank you so much for asking it 🥹

If you wanna ask me more book-related asks, fire away!!

#asks #offendedteaspoon #books

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nateriverswife · 9 months

Note

I would like to see your poems or messy writing, now.

I don't actually know what you mean by messy writing and I do not write poems, so I'll put what I can find in my whatsapp chat since there's a lot of stuff lmao (tell me if you want me to go thru my google docs from years ago)

RANDOM DIALOGUES

A: Are you okay?

B: Yes, I'm just... I don't know.

A: It's pretty normal to feel sad after a breakup.

B: But it's not even that. I'm not crying or something. I'm just... Tired... It's like the fact... It's like everyone... Chooses me, but like, then regrets it, and I don't know why. I always try to…

A: I chose you.

B: What…?

A: I chose you and I don't regret it. I could be with them right now, but I’d rather stay here with you.

B: I know you are telling me this to feel better, but...

A: It's the truth. After all we've been through, I would be kind of an asshole to leave you alone.

B: After the letter I wrote you?

A: Even after that. I wasn't even thinking about it, but I still have it. I can...

B: Do not try.

A: Okay, okay, you're kinda scary even for a child.

B: I'm not a child. Next year I'll be 17.

A: Yeah, I know. You've grown so quickly, and—

B: You got old pretty quickly too.

A: Oh, shut up! You ruin all my speeches.

B: Do you want me to do it again? I can cry if you want.

A: What do you want, B?

B: I need to know what is happening with C.

A: What are you talking about?

B: He has that look.

A: That look?

B: It's, like, that look, like he's scared but tries to hide it.

A: That's nonsense.

B: Nonsense? Are you kidding me? I've had that look for months. I know something is wrong, and I need to know.

A: Why do you talk to him, then?

B: He won't talk to him.

A: I respect his decision.

B: Well, good for you. Now, tell me.

A: It was for you. You have to say it.

A: C, say something!

C: I don’t take sides.

A: *looks at B* How is it so easy for him, like he can just say that…?

A: I needed you to think that someone was after you so you wouldn't battle them.

B: You are mad. I hate you.

A: Hm, unfortunate, but also a privilege... For you. I usually don't get along with people that hate me, ‘cause usually... They are dead.

B: …

B: *looks at the others* Do you guys hear what he’s saying or I'm just going insane?

A: Don't.

B: Why not?

A: I swear to God, if you call him over here, I'm gonna bite off your tongue.

B: C! Hey!

A: What did I tell you?!

B: That you will basically make out with me if I call your prince.

A: Look at those boys! They are looking at you.

B: They are not looking at me.

A: Oh, wow, didn't think I'd be attracting boys. That's cool.

B: They are looking at C.

A: What the hell?! Stuck your fingers in each others’ eyes, you perverts!

A: You failed your test.

B: Because you failed to teach me.

A: No...? Because you didn't show up to any of my lessons.

A: I don't trust him.

B: Because your father told you.

A: Because he showed up in my life and destroyed it.

B: Was your life really any better before?

A: When are you going to tell her, B?

B: When it’s the right time.

A: On her deathbed or… Yours?

A: You've been spending a lot of time with him lately.

B: To argue, yes. It's kinda part of my routine now.

A: And why do you argue?

B: I think you know why.

A: ...

B: ...

A: Oh, yeah, I think I do now.

A: What did she tell you?

B: Not to talk to her unless she talks to me first.

A: And?

B: That she would've preferred for me to commit a bigger crime this time and get the capital punishment... I guess, she wasn't very pleased to see me.

A: Do you hate because you think I'm insufferable or—

B: Yes.

A: I didn't finish.

B: I didn't tell you to stop.

A: Why are you so... Attached to me?!

B: Because you are the only positive thing of my past I have left before I became a bad person.

A: Do you think I did the right thing?

B: You cannot classify it like that. It would be right either way, because, on one side, you would save people and, on the other, you would be with your family... But I think you did a good thing.

A: I am not threatening you. I'm just saying what my intentions are in case you don't comply with what I want you to do.

B: That is threatening.

A: No, threats are empty. My intentions are very much real.

[Okay, the next one is the first draft of a dialogue I added then to Mazzaroth. I actually screamed WHAT IS THIS OMG LMAOO the difference between this and the final draft]

A: It accentuates your eyes.

B: My eyes?

A: Yeah, your eyes are big.

B: Oh, my dad's genes.

A: Your dad's genes?

B: My dad is chinese.

A: I thought your dad is dead.

[Another first draft of a dialogue I didn't put in Mazzaroth this time but it's funny to me. Especially Watari randomly saying that.]

Ethe: Can you not listen to L when he talks about me?

Watari: You know I cannot do that. I need to hear out everyone that comes to me.

Ethe: But he lies about me.

Watari: Don't you think he wouldn't have a reason to come to me if you two went along?

Ethe: ...

Watari: There is the bonfire today.

A: I need a hand.

B: Don't you have two?

RANDOM SENTENCES

"I don't want to lose you... Again. I just found you. You can't just walk away now."

"B, you knew C, right? How she was, her behaviour... Right? Good, because I'm ten times worse. So, either you are behind me or below me, meaning that I'll burn you alive in the melting station we have underground, okay?"

"You were a smart kid, B. What happened to you?"

"You don't need someone. You don't need me. You need a reason to believe that what you did was right."

"That's a sad story. You are going to prison nonetheless."

"I couldn't help but wonder if not being the first choice had been actually a blessing all along, because I distinctly remembered the murderer's gaze being laid upon me before them."

"Always writing? Why don't you give a hand... Are they trying to set each other on fire?"

#i also have an oc x death note fic of when i was 14/15 that i think was the funniest shit ever in some parts #the plot was all over the place #and the male MC had to deal with teen Mello and Near #like absurd #and he was quite stupid #but so funny - tell me if you want that too #thanks for the ask! and i hope you enjoyed them lmao #dn.inbox

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motownfiction · 1 year

Text

epic

Steph has to take one English literature class for her degree. Technically, she could have chosen from a number of classes in a number of subjects. But English literature seemed to scream at her. Take me, take me, Stephanie, take me. When she wasn’t sure why the course listing would be calling out to her with her full name, she knew she had to register. And here she is, now, reading epic poems from what feels like the ancient world.

Her professor swears it is not the ancient world. Medieval times weren’t that long ago, she says, if you think about it. But people say that about all sorts of bygone eras: the 50s, the 20s, the American Revolution, if you’re standing next to the wrong person for too long. People like to keep their favorite things current, Steph thinks. For her English professor, that means Medieval epic poems.

It knocks the wind right out of her, but in the middle of one class meeting, Steph understands why people keep reading this old stuff. It gets her. And if it gets her, who knows what it’s doing for other people who are out there reading it, too?

This week, the professor asks them to read Beowulf, which Steph pretended to read once in eleventh grade and then promptly forgot about it as soon as she took the unit test. And initially, that’s what she’s planning to do in this class: just skim the words and forget about them after she writes a so-so paper. That’s just not what happens.

Because as soon as Steph starts skimming, she realizes she needs to keep reading.

It’s like these old words are connecting her to some part of the world – some part of herself – that’s far away but still needs her. She can’t make it stop. Every time she wants to close the big heavy book and enjoy herself for an hour or two, she can’t. That stupid epic poem sucks her right back in. It’s like torture. Steph stopped thinking of herself as cool at the start of ninth grade, but she never thought of herself as a dork. She never thought of herself as someone who would read Beowulf, with all of its monsters and swords, and enjoy it. But here she is, curled up like a pretzel in her dorm room, reading the hell out of some ancient people’s songs.

One night as they’re getting ready to go to bed (in separate beds tonight, Steph says, so that she can finish her assignment before class in the late morning), Jill asks if Steph wants to be like Beowulf. To her own surprise, Steph says no.

“No,” she says again. “I think I want to be Grendel.”

Jill chuckles.

“Grendel?” she repeats. “Isn’t he, like, the monster?”

“Totally.”

“Why do you want to be him?”

Steph looks up at the ceiling in case the right words are there. In so many ways, they are. When she makes eye contact with Jill again, she knows exactly what to say.

“Come on. You know the monster always has more fun.”

Jill gives her that look that only Jill has ever been able to give her. Steph’s not sure how she would describe it – only that she’d need an epic poet to even begin.

“Damn straight,” Jill says. “You get some sleep, monster.”

Steph can’t be sure, but she’s pretty sure she falls asleep smiling.

(part of @nosebleedclub february challenge -- day ix!)

#drabble #writeblr #ch: steph armstrong #ch: jill edwards #year: 1986

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wordsofgravity · 1 year

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dear big bear,

when you left me, you took everything. (nearly. you let me keep your hoodie even though you wanted it back.) you’ve taken everything and left. and with you, you’ve taken my words. i’ve been trying to write this poem for 64 days, and now after all that time it’s not even going to be a poem. it’s going to be a stupid letter that is so deranged that some shithead fine artist could probably pass it as a postmodern poetic masterpiece and sell it as an nft. you’ve done it! for once something has rendered me such a mess that i can’t even format it into neat rows to make sense of. and i’ve tried to kill myself! twice! that’s really saying something! congrats.

incredible, how even after we - us - (what beautiful words!) - are finished, i’m still writing you letters all the time. i know you never read that last one i sent. about the fish that wrote a whole album. it’s okay. i just wish you had told me to stop. now you have all my words in a pile or a folder shoved somewhere under your bed and i can’t have them back. my words, my words, my words.

i dreamt that you came back to my flat for more of your things. you were here for hours, taking and taking and taking. you kept leaving and coming back. eventually you started taking the floorboards, and great chunks of the walls, until everything was just pipes. everything was just pipes. i was just balancing on pipes, and you were never really leaving, but never really staying either.

i only ever wake up crying when it’s the nice dreams. (insert footage of me battering thom yorke’s face in.) it’s the ones where my brain is still convinced that you’re a part of me. always just kind of there, as a fellow spectator of whatever dr suess gta shit i’m dreaming. not even a separate entity to me. i didn’t ever know that an empty space besides me could feel so cold. if i paid more attention in gcse physics i could probably put some really witty comparison to whatever fucking outer space phenomenon there is in here. instead i’ll say: my bed is too big. it goes on forever. i’m so terrified of sleeping that i’ve just sort of stopped doing it. i heart 8am! very cool.

you wanna know something? the day you left me, it felt like you left with me. like you took me with you and now i’m just some like, dry shedded snake skin that’s gonna disintegrate with the next breeze. i remember as you were leaving, it was raining horribly. we both said “pathetic fallacy” at the exact same time, and then did this awkward kind of laugh-sob also at the same time, and then we were very silent after that. once you’d left, i cried until i almost threw up and then i called mum and asked her to pick me up.

the next day, i swear to god it was the most beautiful day i had seen in months. possibly ever. i don’t even know what kind of symbolism that is to be honest. i’m not clever enough. or maybe i’m still too much in denial. i guess those are the same thing. or maybe just what it means to be human? (hm? so just… never clever enough then???) mum and i threw the petals i’d saved from all the flowers you bought me into the ocean, and they blew straight back and a dog came sniffing at them and it was way less cool than our movie moment the afternoon before. who cares. it all gets to be part of one big metaphor that even i don’t understand in my own non-poem.

do you think any of my future employers have a way of finding this? sometimes i worry. please hire me, i’m only 21 and still very, very stupid. i’m sure i’ll be less stupid by the time you’re reading this. maybe not. but less deranged? probably! (grins at you) (with teeth)

look, what i’m trying to say is that today was really hard. i think a lot of the time i forget that this decision you made for us is a forever decision, and that you’re not ever coming back. we might not even get to be friends again. the thought of that makes me panic. i’m trying to hold the progress i’ve made close, but it’s hard. it’s really hard. today was really fucking hard without you, big bear. i miss you so much. all the fucking time. when we were so, so happy and in love at the beginning, you got annoyed that we kept falling into saying clichéd things because there really was no other way to say such big things. i’m realising now it’s the same with this big huge massive pain. i feel lost without you. how else can i frame that? no matter how much i decorate it, that’s all there is. i miss you. and i’m lost. that’s all. that’s all.

yours no longer,

little bear

#unsent letters #wlw #lesbian #heartbreak #sapphic

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criminalmindzjunkie · 3 years

Text

The More Loving One

Masterlist

Summary: Professor Reid finds himself falling for a student.

A/N: This fic is based on this request. I changed a few things up, but I hope you like the finished product!

Long time, no see! It seems like forever since I got to sit down and just enjoy writing something. And enjoy this, I did. I approached this one a bit differently than I usually do, but I like how it turned out none the less. I hope you all enjoy my take on the Professor Reid arc. The first poem I use in this fic is titled The More Loving One by W.H. Auden, and the second is from a collection of Perry poetry.

Also, I recently hit 2k followers, which is absolutely unbelievable. I can’t even begin to explain how thankful I am for each and every one of you. This fic is my love letter to you. Thank you all so much.

Pairing: Professor!Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Content Warnings: a few swear words maybe?, teacher x student relationship, age gap, exhibitionism (sorta?), vaginal fingering, unprotected sex

Word Count: 4k

For as long as Spencer can remember, he’s always had a predilection for the finer things in life.

Spencer attributes the origin of his preferences to his upbringing. In his childhood, before his mother’s disease got the better of her, she exposed him to all sorts of literature. While he ventured to read all types of writings, he’d always been partial to tales of extravagance. A young Spencer Reid sought refuge in the profligacy of it all, as it was so starkly different from his own reality. Forced to bear the burden of household and a sick mother from an early age, Spencer’s own life left little room for reckless indulgence.

Now, as a single adult male, Spencer makes it a point to give himself up to the finer things as often as he can. Spencer isn’t a rich man, nor is he careless with what hard-earned money he does have. He simply likes to treat himself to the occasional five-star meal, and even more frequently, posh clothing and rare books. Walls lined with hundreds of antiquarian novels and a closet full of Comme Des Garçon cardigans are where the indulgence ends, however, and until recently Spencer was content with this.

But when she strolls into his life on the very first day of his teaching career, Spencer knows that his small luxuries will no longer be enough to keep him satisfied. The part of him that longs to have only the very best roars to life as he takes in every perfect inch of her. She stands before him, the embodiment of divinity and grace, looking like every fantasy he only dares to conjure up in the late hours of the night. A litany of cliches from every piece of romantic literature he’s ever read spring to the forefront of his mind in the instant that her eyes met his, but there is nothing stereotypical about the way her gaze banishes the air from his lungs. It is as jarring as it is intoxicating. He never wants to look away.

Unfortunately, she doesn’t feel the same. With a light flush of her cheeks, she turns away from him, and in an equally unfortunate turn of events, she proceeds to shuffle down the aisle and into the second row of seats to the right of the podium. The realization that washes over him feels like ice water in his veins.

She’s a student. Worse even – she’s his student.

Spencer wrenches his gaze from her as if he’s been burned, and the fiery shame of his embarrassment makes him tug at his collar. As he struggles to stave away the lingering heat in his chest and even more embarrassingly, the tightness in his trousers, Spencer chastises himself. His own carnal urges often go ignored, a fact that is glaringly obvious as he cowers behind his podium in an attempt to hide his arousal. He feels more than a little bit pathetic. No self-respecting thirty-five-year-old man gets hard just from gazing upon a beautiful young woman.

When Spencer pulls himself together enough to start his lecture, he positively forbids himself to look her way. It is hard to fight the urge, but every time he catches his eyes wandering to her, he reminds himself that she is an indulgence he simply cannot partake in. No matter how badly he wants to.

It doesn’t take long for her to notice him noticing her.

In the early days of the semester, she manages to convince herself that the stolen glances are but a figment of her overactive imagination. That, or an unhealthy dose of wishful thinking. But as the semester stretches on and the professor’s eyes linger more and more, wishful thinking gives way to a startling realization that she isn’t alone in her attraction. Professor Reid is, to her complete and utter astonishment, just as taken with her as she is with him.

This is all but confirmed when a slight brushing of the hands during an exchange of papers leaves them both with flushed cheeks and pounding hearts. Both of their heads snap up, two sets of eyes meeting in a prolonged stare that results in an understanding of sorts. It’s mutual, this thing blossoming between them. She can see her own hopes reflected in two velvet pools of brown – can see the longing, the desire that burns within them. Her heart soars, as she imagines his does, and she accepts the papers with a smile.

She also imagines that, if he could, he would tell her to wait for him. He would tell her that, for now, their relationship must stay strictly professional.

This doesn’t stop them from sating their cravings in other ways.

She makes it a point to stop by during office hours at least twice a week. Her visits always fall under the guise of her studies, but within minutes their hushed conversations stray from the professional and towards a more personal nature. She learns of Spencer’s mother and her condition, of his unusual job and his coworkers that were more like family. In return, she tells him about her upbringing in southern California, as well as her dreams of becoming a criminal psychologist. They never go as far as to discuss what will happen when the semester comes to a close. It is an unspoken agreement that the end of the semester will find them in each other’s arms. All they have to do is wait.

Spencer can’t voice his affections with words, but he more than makes up for this with his actions. Without fail, every Monday following the very first clandestine brushing of hands, lavish bouquets of flowers arrive at her workplace. Each bouquet is always paired with a notecard inscribed with a brief explanation of the meaning behind that week’s flower of choice. Cherry blossoms to pay homage to her beauty, plumeria to symbolize their new beginning, agrimony to convey his thankfulness that she is willing to wait for him.

Her favorite bouquet arrives four weeks before the end of the semester. As she steps through the doors of the bakery, a vase full of nine red roses sits atop the counter. The sight of them nearly takes her breath away. She pauses for a moment and runs her fingertips across the velveteen petals before plucking the notecard from its place.

This week, Spencer chooses to forgo the explanation in favor of a messily scrawled poem;

Looking up at the stars, I know quite well

that, for all they care, I can go to hell,

But on earth indifference is the least

we have to dread from man or beast.

How should we like it were stars to burn

with a passion for us we could not return?

If equal affection cannot be,

let the more loving one be me.

That evening, Spencer receives his first bouquet from her. On his desk sits an arrangement of pale pink ambrosia.

The meaning isn’t lost on him, but if it were, the note that sits next to the vase makes her intentions clear.

We never had to force love.

We were drowning in it from the moment we met.

Spencer is horribly frustrated.

A mere twenty feet away from where he stands, the notoriously garish and wholly unprofessional PhD program director is gesticulating wildly to the young woman that stands trapped between him and the hors d’oeuvre table. To find Professor Van Wesep in such a position is not uncommon, due to his penchant for trying to charm (terrorize) the prospective female doctoral candidates. The man is practically a walking harassment complaint waiting to happen. Spencer would abhor Van Wesep even if he weren’t the only thing standing in the way of him and his lover.

At long last, the semester has drawn to a close. The lonely nights spent longing to hold her in his arms are a thing of the past. By the time the sun rises again, Spencer will no longer have to wonder what her body will feel like pressed against his. He’ll be thoroughly acquainted with every inch of her, and she with him. The thought sends a thrilled chill down his spine.

The torturous foreplay they’ve been engaging in for the last four months would have surely broken a lesser man. Spencer would be lying if he said he wasn’t tempted on more than one occasion to have her during one of her frequent visits to his office. Some days, when her visits came later in the evenings, just as the sun began to dip low in the sky, her eyes would glisten in such a way that told Spencer her thoughts were none dissimilar to his own. That glimmer of lust had him holding on to his restraint by the skin of his teeth.

And here they were, on the last evening of the semester. Final grades had been submitted and were released hours prior. Spencer would have been content to skip this event altogether, in favor of more… recreational activities, but his lover insisted on attending.

Initially, Spencer assumed her insistence lay in her desire to mingle with her future peers and mentors. Her true intentions come to light when she breezes into the room clad in a pair of sleek, designer pumps. Her lips, painted fire engine red, curl up into a playful smile at the sight of a slack-jawed Spencer Reid. The devious glint in her eye twinkles sinfully in the light.

Tonight isn’t a social call at all. Tonight, she wants to play with him.

And play she has.

From the second she arrives all eyes are fixating on her celestial beauty. Peers and mentors alike trip over themselves in their haste to capture her attention, if only for a fleeting moment. She works the room flawlessly, leaving a trail of smitten men of all ages in her wake.

The most smitten is Spencer himself, because he’s the lone recipient of countless heated glances, as well as more than a few knowing smirks. She well aware of what she’s doing to him, and she takes pleasure in watching him squirm.

Spencer intervenes when Van Wesep makes the ill-advised decision to reach a hand up to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear. He barely has the time to withdraw his hand before Spencer is upon them.

“I apologize for the interruption,” Spencer casts a faux apologetic glance at his colleague, before settling his gaze on his target. “Ms. Y/L/N, may I speak to you for a moment?”

She looks positively gleeful. Perhaps Spencer should have intervened hours ago.

“Absolutely, Professor Reid.”

The honorific sends a jolt of heat straight to his groin. He definitely should have stolen her away earlier.

The two of them say their goodbyes to a confused Professor Van Wesep, whose imploring eyes follow them as they hurriedly slip from the party and down the hallway.

“Where are we going?”

Spencer leads her down a long corridor, far beyond earshot of the other guests. Pushing her into a dark corner, he positions her between himself and the cold wooden door of an unoccupied office. The only sounds that can be heard are the distant thrum of the music and the eager pants falling from his lover’s lips.

Spencer pulls her into a searing kiss, one hand tangling in her hair and the other finding purchase on her waist. He worries for a moment that he’s being too rough with her, that he should have taken a more careful approach to their first kiss, but she assuages those worries when she kisses him back with equal enthusiasm. Her hand reaches between them and clutches his tie, then she’s pulling him closer and whining wantonly against his lips. Spencer takes this as an invitation to slip his tongue inside and he finds himself letting out a low groan when he tastes a hint of strawberry.

Spencer pulls away to catch his breath. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.”

“Oh, I think I do, Professor,” she laughs, breathless. “Probably just as long as I’ve wanted to do this.”

Spencer jolts forward when her hand slides down to cup him over his trousers.

“Could’ve done that a lot earlier if you hadn’t insisted on teasing me for the entire night,” Spencer growls through gritted teeth. He’s more than a little proud of his ability to string together a sentence with her hand working him over with slow, steady strokes.

He trails a line of kisses across the underside of her jaw, before taking her earlobe and nipping it lightly with his canine. Spencer’s actions are rewarded with a full body shudder. He dips his tongue in the hollow at the base of her throat and her hands ball into fists against his dress shirt.

“Spencer, please.”

Spencer hums and pulls back to look at her. The hand in her hair lowers, and he trails a thumb across where her nipples are hard against the fabric of her dress.

“Yes, my love?”

Her eyes flutter against the weight of her arousal, and Spencer twitches in his pants. The sight of her with her hair disheveled and her lipstick smeared on account of him is a heavenly thing. He doesn’t know how he ever deprived himself of such a splendor.

“I want you. Right now.” She punctuates her words by pulling him down into a frenzied kiss. One of her hands tangles itself in the hair at the nape of his neck while the other busies with tugging his shirt out of his pants.

“Right now?” Spencer taunts, mouth against mouth. His hand trails down the side of her breast, caressing her rib cage and her hip before stopping at her upper thigh. Spencer’s fingertips toy with the tops of her lace thigh highs. “But anyone could walk by and see us.”

“I don’t care,” she argues, fumbling clumsily as she struggles to undo his belt buckle.

Spencer’s wandering hand dips below the hem of her dress to explore the silky-smooth skin of her inner thigh. She’s soft here, too, he thinks to himself as his hand travels up, up, up. He stops just short of where she wants him most and she lets out a despairing cry.

“You wouldn’t mind someone walking by and seeing you with your pretty legs spread wide for your professor?”

Spencer brings life to his words by lifting her leg up, hitching her thigh around his hip and pressing into her. The silk fabric of her dress rustles as he pushes it up and out of the way.

A breathy moan tumbles from her lips as he rocks against her, dragging his arousal up and down the front of her lace panties. The friction is maddening in that it provides only the smallest bit of relief. It’s not enough for Spencer, and judging by the way she desperately pushes down the fabric of his pants, it’s not enough for his partner, either.

“Need to get these off now,” she murmurs against Spencer’s mouth. An eager hand tugs at the elastic band of his underwear.

Spencer places his hand on hers, stilling her movements. “Not so fast, baby. Gotta make sure you’re ready for me first.”

Her fingers clamp down on Spencer’s wrist, guiding him to the sodden lace between her thighs.

“Don’t think that’s gonna be a problem,” she whimpers as Spencer’s fingers take appraisal of the drenched cloth. “In fact, I think four months of foreplay is sufficient enough. Wouldn’t you say?”

“Maybe so,” Spencer muses, voice muffled as he sucks at the skin of her neck. “But I’m not willing to chance hurting you our first time together. You’re entirely too precious to me.”

Spencer captures her lips in a kiss so sweet it has her sighing into his mouth. When he pulls away, he fixes her with a smile.

“You’re not particularly fond of these panties, are you?”

Her eyebrows pull together. “No, why?”

Spencer pulls at the flimsy fabric harshly and it gives way under the force of it. He reaches back to stuff the thong in his back pocket.

“That’s why.”

Spencer’s lips come down against hers at the same time his middle and index fingers drag across her slickness. His foresight pays off when his mouth muffles the sound of her cries. As confident he is that they won’t be found, a cry like that would certainly have drawn unwanted attention.

The swipe of his thumb across her crest paired with the gentle pressure of his fingers dipping into her heat is enough to make her legs buckle. Had it not been for Spencer pressing her against the wall, she surely would have fallen to the ground in a trembling heap.

“I could get lost in you for hours,” Spencer groans, curling his fingers inside her in such a way that makes her clutch desperately to his shirt.

“Spencer, oh my God,” she keens. “I need you, please.”

“You have me, my love,” Spencer whispers the promise against her parted lips. “You’ve had me since the first moment I laid eyes on you.”

Spencer speeds up the onslaught of his fingers until the telltale tightening of her heat warns him of her impending climax. He has to bite down on his lower lip to regain his own composure. The feeling of her tight and wet around his fingers is almost too good.

“Spencer, I’m getting close,” she whimpers.

Spencer continues until she’s on the cusp of tumbling over the edge, until one more pass of his fingers against her crest would surely seal the deal, and then he’s removing his hand and taking a step back.

“Spencer, what the fu-,” she pauses when he promptly shoves his pants and underwear just enough to free himself from their painful confines. “Oh.”

A dazed smile makes its way to her face as Spencer presses himself against her once more. He sweeps her up into a kiss comprised of pure, unadulterated desire, before pulling away and smirking deviously at her.

“Jump.”

It takes a moment for her pleasure fogged brain to make sense of the request, but as soon as it does, she complies without question.

Spencer’s hands grip her thighs firmly and in one swift thrust he sheaths himself into her fully – an indulgence so grand that all others dull in comparison. Now that he’s had the finest, felt it wrapped around him like warm velvet, he can’t imagine a world in which he must live without it.

“Spencer!”

Spencer swears he’s never heard a sweeter sound than her crying out his name as their bodies come together for the first time. It’s synonymous with a siren call, he thinks, because in that moment she could lure him to certain death and he knows he would go with a smile.

His lips seek purchase on the exposed skin of her chest as he buries himself in her paradise again and again. The sharp sting of her heels digging into his back with every thrust brings out a sort of primal urge in him, spurring him to rut up into her like a man possessed.

“You feel perfect,” Spencer groans out against the flushed skin of her neck. He presses a soft kiss to where her pulse bounds just beneath the skin before pulling away and locking eyes with her. “When I’m old and gray and can remember nothing else, I’ll remember this. I’ll remember how it felt to kiss you for the first time – how it felt to touch you. How it felt to worship you and make love to your body.”

Spencer’s voices catches, thick and overwhelmed with emotion.

“I’ll remember how it feels to love you.”

Her breath catches in her throat and sharp pang of panic burns hot in his chest. Had he misinterpreted her affections? Did she not burn for him in the same way? Perhaps the ambrosia meant nothing. Spencer’s movements falter, and for several torturous seconds he’s nearly paralyzed with fear.

She silences those fears with a kiss.

“Oh, Spencer,” she sighs as she presses her forehead against his. “I love you, too. More than you could ever comprehend.”

Spencer resumes moving in and out of her, but the frenzied feeling from before is replaced with something else now. Something softer, but no less passionate.

“Yeah?” he inquires, searching her eyes for any trace of insincerity. He finds none, and it’s a relief. Any hint of falseness in her claim would surely lead to a heartbreak he could never recover from.

“Yes.” The word trails off into a moan. “I love you, Spencer Reid. I don’t imagine I’ll ever stop.”

Spencer’s heart jolts and he whines pathetically against her mouth. “I’m counting on that.”

“I’m close, Spencer,” she pants, her breath hitting his face in warm puffs. “Don’t think I can last much longer.”

“Me, too.” Spencer nudges her nose with his own. “Reach between us and touch yourself, my love. I want us to cum together. Can you do that for me?”

She nods, and the hand that clung to his right shoulder dips in between them to rub tight circles against her crest. Spencer doubles his efforts when he sees her eyelids flutter closed, and the resulting tightening of her core leaves him panting hard.

“Spencer, I-” her breath catches in her throat as Spencer delivers a particularly strong thrust. Her head falls against his shoulder, her soft moans of his name like heaven to his ears.

“Cum with me, baby,” Spencer grunts out desperately. He needs it like he needs air to breath and water to drink. And once he has it, he knows he’ll need it again and again.

She gives it to him with a muffled cry of his name and he’s instantly swept away, drowning in the blissful way her body sings for him. His body follows her lead, shattering completely under her fingertips.

While he’s been through similar acts with previous partners, those instances always felt impersonal and clinical. The caresses and whispered words were all a means to an end, an end that usually left him feeling lonelier and emptier than when he started. But right now, as he feels the beat of her heart pressed against his own, he swears he couldn’t feel fuller - full of adoration, full of affection, full of love. It’s beautiful and overwhelming and everything Spencer didn’t know he was looking for.

A raucous round of applause erupts from the direction of the party, startling the two of them. Spencer feels her laugh against his neck.

“It’s almost as if they were applauding us for a job well done.”

Spencer presses a chaste kiss to the crown of her head.

“As they should. That was sensational.”

Spencer carefully pulls out and lowers her to the floor. He wastes no time in tilting her chin up and capturing her lips in a reverent kiss. Spencer hopes his lips convey his gratitude.

The two of them pull apart and set to making themselves presentable. Their efforts prove to be in vain when Spencer points out a dark purple love bite nestled into the crook of her neck. She counters this by taking note of the smudge of red lipstick on his collar.

“What an adulterous pair we make, Professor.”

Spencer rolls his eyes good-naturedly. “I’m not your professor anymore.” He bends down and places a kiss to her lips before taking her hand in his.

“I suppose you’re not,” she muses as they meander down the corridor. “Whatever shall we do now?”

As the two of them step out of the dark hallway and reenter the party, Spencer smiles to himself. Visions of wedding rings flit through his mind. Spencer supposes he’ll have to take a break from the posh clothing and rare books in favor of saving his money. He’ll buy only the finest ring for his future wife, after all.

“I have a few ideas.”

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peachbear88 · 3 years

Text

The Greatest Love Story

A/N: Inspired by this lovely image I saw. I'm making this into a high school angst AU that takes place in like the 1900's. For the record, I know Steve isn't a bad person but this is an AU and I need one of those... You know, guys for this story so.... Yeah! Sorry! BTW, the second poem is not written by me, it's written by Elizabeth Barrett Browning and I stole some quotes from Shakespeare.

Warnings: Angst, homophobia, swearing, character death.

Word Count: 3.2k

Pairing: Yelena Belova x Reader

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You scale the ancient wooden stairs of your small school. avoiding eye contact with anyone. The stares you receive from others are painfully obvious as you speed walk towards the library, seeking shelter from the judgmental glances from your peers.

"Hello dear," the kind librarian greets you as you walk past her towards your corner of the library.

You don't respond, quickly ducking behind the massive shelves, hoping to spend as much time as possible in your safe space before the classes start. Placing back your old books, you scan the shelves, until a particular title catches your eye.

"Love Poems by Women?" You murmur, flipping through the worn pages.

----------

A giant dusty book lands on the librarian's desk, making her look up.

"May I take this out?" You ask, your tone emotionless, cold yet tentative. The librarian smiles gently at you handing you back the book.

"Of course dear. Happy reading." You give her a small, thankful smile before dashing out of the library door. The halls are partially empty, save for the kids that skip class, hanging around in the hallways and dark alleys after school.

You duck your head, avoiding eye contact as you pass the group leaning against the lockers, most importantly, the hazel eyed beauty that could snap your neck in half, Yelena Belova.

"Hey!" Your head snaps up. Big mistake. You lock eyes with the famed blonde and you drop your head immediately, a faint blush creeping up your cheeks.

"Y-Yes?"

"Look at me when I'm talking to you." She snaps. You peek at her from the corner of your eye, her sleek dress pants catching your eye.

"Interesting outfit choice," you note before you can stop yourself.

"What did you say?" She demands and you gulp, backing away.

"N-nothing." She slowly steps towards you, backing you into the lockers.

"Get to class. And don't ever let me see you again идиот (idiot)." You hurry down the hall towards your classroom, tripping in the process as you repeatedly look over your shoulder, watching as Yelena turns back to her friend group.

---------

"She was cute," Natasha points out as Yelena reclaims her spot leaning against the lockers. "Why do you feel the need to tease her so relentlessly?" Yelena rolls her eyes, grabbing the flask of vodka back from her sister.

"She's annoying. I don't like her." Natasha smirks.

"Sure. Whatever you say."

---------

You let out a sigh of relief when the bell rings.

Your classmates flood out of the classroom, jostling each other aside in their rush to get home. You quickly sprint out the door, eager to get home, safe and sound when a hand grabs you by the arm and pulls you into a dark alley behind the school.

"Hello there girly..." A deep voice says. You gulp. The boy steps into the light to reveal Steve Rogers. One of those people that take pride in hurting others, a bully, your tormenter.

"W-what do you want?" He smirks, stepping closer to you.

"Well, a little birdie told me that someone had an encounter with a specific blonde this morning." You flinch when he grabs you by the throat, pinning you to the wall. "You wouldn't happen to be... I don't know, one of those dykes would you?" Your eyes widen and you shake your head vigorously as he laughs. "Oh man," he sputters, choking through his laughter. "Wait till the school gets ahold of this-"

He doesn't get to finish his sentence because a fist connects with his face, sending him reeling backwards.

"What the-" A strong hand wraps around his throat, pushing him backwards till his back connects with the wall.

"Listen to me you маленькое дерьмо (little shit), if you ever even think about coming near her again, I will sneak into your house at night, gut you like the fish you are and paint the school with them." Yelena warns in a surprisingly calm voice. Steve's eyes widen and he nods his head frantically until she lets go.

"Crazy bitch!" He spits, backing away quickly. You shuffle your feet, looking down at the ground as she watches him run.

"T-thank you." You mutter, not daring to look her in the eye. She sighs.

"This better not become a daily thing Y/L/N." You nod feebly. "Get out of here." You quickly pick your bag back up and sprint out of the alley, leaving Yelena by herself,

---------

"I'm home mom!"

"Welcome home sweetie!" Your mom pokes her head out of the living room.

"How's your book going?"

"As great as a woman writing a book can be." She chuckles forcibly. There's an awkward silence before she continues. "Your father came by today." She pauses as you swallow, feeling like something lodged itself in your throat.

"And what did he want?" She frowns at your tone.

"Sweetie, I know you don't like him but he's still your fa-"

"I don't have a dad," you growl, picking up your bag. "My dad died when he chose to abandon us." She watches as you climb up the stairs, sighing and rubbing her temple.

---------

You flop onto your bed, dropping the thick dusty buck onto the bed. You spend the rest of the afternoon reading through the poems until your mom calls you down for dinner.

It's an awkward dinner, quiet, only the sounds of dishes, chewing and utensils filling the room.

"I'm going to bed." You say after washing the dishes, not bothering to wait for a response.

That night, you lay in bed, staring at the ceiling of your room.

"Love poems by women." You mutter, an idea popping into your head. You quickly sit up, flicking on your lamp and pulling out the book and a pen.

----------

"Good morning dear," the librarian greets you like she does every morning.

"I'd like to return this book." You reply coldly, passing her the book once again. She smiles gently at you.

"I hope you enjoyed your reading." She says while passing you, returning the book to its original shelf.

-----------

"Hello hon, can I help you with anything?" The librarian asks the dirty-blonde haired girl.

"No, thank you." The girl sends the librarian a tight lipped smile before returning her attention to the shelves. A ripped leather cover catches her attention. Love Poems by Women. She smiles, pulling the book from the shelf. Flipping open to the title page, a neat cursive catches her eyes.

Love flows between beings Gift from the gods Curse from the demons The missing part of every person Destined to be opposites Love is flexible Yet some seek to objectify love Love is not for the weak willed. - Aristophanes

The blonde haired girl hums, pulling a pen from her jacket's pocket and discreetly writing in the book, right next to the poem.

------------

Terrible.

That's the only way to describe your day. You received your essay back, ecstatic to see that you had received an A. Steve on the other hand had absolutely flunked. Instead of dedicating his time to studying, he decided to beat you up as a way of taking out his frustration.

You ended up limping out of the women's toilet, your leg flaring up whenever you moved, tears threatening to fall from your eyes.

"Hi sweetcheeks," the librarian murmurs, her eyes trailing down your injured leg.

"'Ello." You quickly duck behind the shelves, pulling out the book you were looking for. Your brows scrunch together in confusion as you see a messier scrawl next to your handwriting.

Reality hits hard

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight For the ends of being and ideal grace. I love thee to the level of every day's Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I love thee purely, as they turn from praise. I love thee with the passion put to use In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith. I love thee with a love I seemed to lose With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death.

- Orpheus

You smile letting a light laugh slip from your lips. A sweet titter revealing the little girl underneath your cold, traumatized exterior.

Quickly, you grab your pen from your pocket and begin scribbling.

-----------

The air is knocked from your body as your back makes contact with the floor.

"Listen here dyke. I don't like you alright," Steve growls into your ear as Tony cracks his knuckles. "So here's what's going to happen: Everyday you're going to meet us here and," he pauses, cracking his neck. "Help us relive some stress." He smiles wickedly before punching you in the stomach, making you double over in pain.

Your eyes flutter shut as they deliver blow after blow 'till they finally stop. You tentatively open your eyes to see Yelena tackling Steve to the ground as Tony stares at them, eyes wide.

"I. Told. You. To. Leave. Her. Alone!" She screams, pummeling Steve with her fists. He groans, unmoving. You watch in terror as Tony picks up a trash can lid, sneaking up behind her as she punches Steve in the face.

"Watch out!" You scream, taking Tony as well yourself by surprise. She looks up to see you slamming into Tony sending him flying into the nearby wall of the alley.

He crumples, unconscious.

"Are you okay?" You mumble, limping towards Yelena, who's clutching a blood gash on her arm.

"'M fine,' she grits out. You shake your head, grabbing her wrist. She flinches but doesn't push you away.

"You're not okay. Let me help you." You plead. She stays silent and you quickly take her silence as a yes, leading her to the front steps of your home. You rummage through your back pack, finding a large wrap of bandages that you kept after your daily beating from Rogers and his friends.

She winces as you wrap her wound swiftly.

"Gentle!" She growls and you stare back at her defiantly.

"Well maybe if you would stop moving, it'd hurt less!" You retort and she shuts up, staring off into the distance. You dab the cut with a small bit of alcohol before wrapping the bandage all around her arm.

"Thank you." She whispers, giving you a small smile. Reaching out, she gently tucks a strand of hair behind your ear as you flinch back. You quickly, shovel the bandages and medicinal alcohol back into your pack, not noticing the hurt look on her face.

"No problem. The least I could do since you saved me." You reply bluntly, swinging the bag over your shoulder and slipping through the door.

"Wait-" She sighs as the door slams shut in front of her.

You exhale, leaning against the door as you try to catch your breath.

-----------

Yelena sighs exasperatedly, tugging at the collar of her dress shirt.

"What's wrong little sis?" Natasha smirks, plopping down next to her.

"I got hurt and Y/N patched me up." Natasha jumps up, eyes wide.

"You stained your new shirt?" She groans shaking Yelena violently. "God I'm going to kill you!" Yelena grabs her sister, stopping her.

"You're missing the point!"

"Oh yeah? And what's that?" Nat challenges, flopping back down on to the couch.

"She patched me up!" Nat's eyes widen.

"Oh. Oh." She inches closer to her sister, nudging her playfully, much to Yelena's dislike. "So are y'all like," she winks at her sister insinuatingly. "A thing?" Yelena scrunches her brows in confusion.

"A thing?" Nat rolls her eyes, sidling closer to her.

"Yes. A thing. An item? Lovers?" She shrugs, missing the way Yelena blushes.

"In her dreams," Yelena snorts, leaning back into the couch.

"If you say so..."

-----------

"Morning pumpkin!" The librarian chirps.

The blonde girl ignores her, breezing past her towards the the shelves at the very back, peeking over her shoulder quickly before pulling an old, leather bound book from the shelf.

She flips the leather cover aside to reveal the title page. Next to her messy, distorted scrawl was a neat, distinctive cursive once again.

Speak low if you speak love

- Aristophanes

She smiles gently, chuckling as she shakes her head.

"Shakespeare of all people," she whispers, her accent thickening. Pulling a forgotten pen from the shelves, she begins writing,

-----------

The highlight of your day became going to the library and reading the little messages scrawled in between the margins of the book by Orpheus. Like:

If music be the food of love, play on

Her passions are made of nothing but the finest part of pure love.

They made you smile on a daily basis, sometimes even eliciting a rare light laugh.

"Good morning sweetpea." The librarian greets you, not expecting a response. To her surprise and yours, you muster a small smile and a wave.

"Hello." You can feel the librarians shocked eyes following you as you round the bookshelf corner to find Steve, eyes wide, mouth open in shock as he stares down at something in his hands.

Your heart plummets. A book with a soft leather cover, yellowed pages. The book of poems.

You lunge for it but he step sides you swiftly, raising the book above his head.

"Speak low if you speak of love huh? I'm not surprised you know Shakespeare, you're such a nerd." He sneers, waving the book above his head.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about." You stutter, backing up. He grabs you by the collar of your shirt, lifting you into the air.

"Don't fuck with me!" He growls, dropping the book and kicking it to the side. "Who's Orpheus?"

"G-Greek hero. Musician." You stutter and he slaps you, hard. You can feel your cheek swelling under his fiery gaze.

"Don't even try me. Who. Is. Orpheus?"

"I don't know, I swear!" You mutter, wincing when you accidentally bite your cheek.

He drops you, watching as you scramble to your feet, backing away.

"This isn't over you little shit. I'll be back for you," he warns, giving your book one last kick for good measure before storming out of the library with Tony and Bucky on his heels.

You fall to your knees, silently sobbing as you crawl over too the book, dusting it off and hugging it to your chest.

Yelena sighs, her heart breaking as she watches you curl around the book protectively, lying on the floor.

-----------

"Where are you going?"

Yelena turns to find Nat, leaning against the school stairwell doorway, watching her.

"Just up to the roof. Need some fresh air," she lies, avoiding Nat's gaze. Nat lifts Yelena's chin up, staring into her eyes, boring into her very soul. Yelena squirms under her gaze until she finally lets go.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay." She smiles sadly at her little sister. "Just-" Her voice cracks as she pats her sister's shoulder. "Don't do anything stupid."

"Don't worry. I won't." She gives Nat a brief hug before hiking her pants up and starting up the stairs.

-----------

"Ah, well look who decided to join the party!" You look up from the ground to see Yelena, your eyes clouded with pain.

"No..." You croak but Steve pays no attention to you.

"Come to save your love Yelena?" He sneers, dropping you to the ground. "Or should I say... Orpheus?" Your eyes widen as you watch him advance towards her, pushing her closer to the edge of the roof.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She deadpans and Steve chuckles.

"Sure. If you won't admit, I'll just have to settle for destroying you from the inside out instead." He grabs her by the arm. "I haven't forgotten what you did to me." He points at a long thin scar along his jawline.

You watch as Tony sneaks up from behind Yelena, striking her with a metal bar. She crumples, falling to her knees.

"Hold her." Steve directs and Bucky dutifully grabs you by the arms. He holds Yelena's chin in between his thumb and forefinger, forcing her to look at him. "Now you watch as I destroy the one thing you love the most." Tony tosses his the metal bar and Steve prepares himself before swinging it like a baseball bat.

There's a sickening crunch followed by your scream as the bar makes contact with your ribs.

"Stop!" She struggles, her eyes never leaving your broken body as he hits you over and over again. "Please! Leave her alone!"

Steve smiles evilly, locking eyes with her before swinging the bat again. Another scream. Blood trickles down your face from your nose.

"Is that right? Did the famous Yelena Belova just beg me?" He smiles cruelly before pushing you down on your back, his foot on your chest. You scream as he increases the pressure, your broken ribs digging into your lungs.

Yelena screams, kicking Tony's legs out from under him before punching Steve in the jaw. She grabs the iron bar before it hits the ground, clobbering Bucky in the stomach before kicking Steve in the stomach.

"ты сука (you bitch)!" She steps on his face swiftly, taking satisfaction in the groan of pain he emits before turning to you, gently cradling your face.

"Wow... That was pretty badass," you mumble and she laughs, tearing up. You reach out, wiping the tears from her eyes. "Don't cry." She frowns.

"I'm not crying."

"You are too." You smile, wincing in pain. "I didn't know you knew Shakespeare."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let this happen." You frown, caressing her face, forcing her to look at you.

"Hey, hey. It's fine. Don't worry. I'll be fine." You attempt to smile reassuringly but it comes out as more of a grimace. "Listen, if I don't make it-"

"Don't say that! You can't leave me!"

"Shush, listen you thickheaded poet. If I don't make it, go back to the book." You instruct her. She frowns but you can her off. "Promise me."

"But-"

"Promise me."

"I promise..."

"Good." You smile at her, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead, your eyesight blurring. "Wait for me okay?" Your eyes flutter shut.

"No! No Y/N! Come back!" She shakes you roughly, sobbing when you don't respond.

----------

Yelena watches as your body is carted off under a white sheet. Nat stands to the side, watching as her sister stares off into the distance, all life drained from her body.

Go back to the book.

She stands, slowly trailing towards the library, her eyes bloodshot, cheeks caked with dry tears.

"Hi dear," the librarian greets her, discreetly wiping her eyes with a handkerchief. "What a shame. She was a lovely girl."

"She really was the best." Yelena agrees quietly, giving the librarian a small, comforting pat on the back before moving to the back of the library where she finds the book, lying on the floor.

Yelena,

I believe that we are the greatest love poem ever written. I love you always,

Y/N

A choked sob escapes her lips as she stares at the page. You knew. You knew the whole time and you didn't even say anything. A pair of soft arms wrap around Yelena's stomach as she lets go of the dam, her cries echoing throughout the library.

"I'm sorry..."

I'm sorry...

----------

Taglist: @username23345 @musicinourlips @gingerbreadcookieforlife @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @trikruismybitch @ima-gi--na-tion @nicole-rayleigh-hot @olsensnpm @peabrain112

#yelena belova x reader #yelena belova x you

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slightlymore · 4 years

Text

my soulmate loves wine

part of the ‘soulmates collection’

doyoung x fem reader

others: jaemin, jeno

genre: one-shot, soulmates au, enemies? to lovers, romance, smut, fluffy tones, phone chat (there are pics of the conversation)

warnings: tarot readings, alcohol, swearing, insults, explicit sex scenes (oral f and m, penetration, protected and unprotected - seriously, have unprotected sex only with people you trust. if you will have unprotected sex with strangers, i will manifest in the room and besides it being absolutely embrarrassing for you, i will also smack your heads together and call you stupid - bondage, rough, spanking, hair pulling, spit swallowing, slight breeding kink, use of 'slut', dom doyoung, sub doyoung, overstimulation f and m, edging f and m, dry humping, wet humping, mouth fucking, cum swallowing, slight exhibitionism, f solo, m solo, phone sex), doyoung has a big cock too lmao (in all of my own personal readings I always get that my soulmate has a big cock for no reason and I thought it was a funny detail)

words: 17K

tag list: @seostudios @doyochii @doodlingpizza @eboyhyunjunreblogs @mina-is-babie @sorrywonwoo @peterrogers15 @delphiskpoporacle @waffletaeng @wownajaemin @shimyshimykoko @doyoung-onli @chxb03 @strawberrymilkandcigarettes @hyucksie @neonun-au @cumtrov3rsy

_____

January 1st 2:23 am

And if he's not my soulmate, I'd rather wander alone than touching someone else's skin, I'd rather walk this earth with no hand to hold and lift me from the ground. And if I have to heal from it and accept the universe's imposed call, I'd rather suffer from my eternally open wounds. I'll fight the stars and let them burn me, I'll let them laugh at my weakest state and I'd gladly make them erase my memory of ever existing in all of the infinite lives if I have to follow Fate.

Doyoung felt the golden letters on the book cover in front of him and raised his eyes when he heard the crystal curtain move.

“I wouldn’t open it if I were you.”

A middle-aged woman was smiling at him, walking towards the table Doyoung and Jaemin were sat at.

The room became even darker but a certain comfort engulfed Doyoung when she smiled.

“I’ve never seen a book with a poem on the cover instead of a title.”

“A dear friend of mine made it.”

Her expression was calm and peaceful when she eyed the book and put her hand on it, pulling it towards herself.

“It’s beautiful,” Doyoung looked at the worn bordeaux leather. “What’s inside?”

“I’m glad you like it. And that’s-,” she leaned in mysteriously, “-a secret.”

As she spoke, a little candle lit up between them and the boys both flinched.

“Wow,” Jaemin whispered.

Doyoung blinked at the woman then chuckled once, laughing mostly at himself for being so jumpy for no reason. That place was made to look creepy but he reminded himself that it was only a facade.

“I’m here for a reading.” Her gaze was piercing and Doyoung realized that she hadn’t stopped looking at him since she entered the room.

“There’s a certain resistance on your part.” Doyoung tried not to snort. “Well…” I don’t believe in these sorts of things, he wanted to say, but Jaemin suddenly laughed, slamming his palm on the table and making a decent amount of colourful stones jingle on the glass table.

Doyoung sighed. “Sorry, my friend is very drunk.”

“You’re also drunk as fuck,” the other pointed his finger to the first’s face, poking him in the nose as he couldn’t keep his balance.

The woman smiled kindly as if unbothered to suddenly have two obnoxious young men trying to get a reading at two in the morning. “This is going to be a love reading. We’ll see what the Spirit wants to tell you about your soulmate.” “Actually, I’m here for a general one? Like, I don’t know-,” Doyoung tried to find his words and looked at Jaemin. “Money and sex?” the younger one suggested before they could have another laughter fit for no apparent reason. The woman kept the corner of her lips lifted as she retrieved a beautiful tarot deck. “Would you blow on this please?” Jaemin tried to open his eyes. “Blow? Of course. Doyoung is good at blowing.” Doyoung hit him with the shoulder. “Shut the fuck up. We’ll get kicked out if you continue,” he whispered amused. Or at least he tried to whisper. The boys kept giggling for a few more moments then got serious as they eyed the spread of cards in front of them.

The woman nodded and smiled.

Doyoung blinked at the lady then at the cards.

"There's mystery and magic attached to this connection. The universe wants this to be a surprise. You’ve been manifesting a lot, haven’t you?”

The young man felt suddenly very awake.

“Uhm, no.”

“It’s okay if you’re not honest with me. The Spirit can see your true feelings. It’s saying that if you needed a confirmation that this is real, then here it is.”

Doyoung stared at her nail, tapping at the card and wondered how many years of training she needed to be able to read people like that since he was sure that that piece of paper could not be able to tell her anything.

Relaxing on his chair he tried to put on the most neutral expression ever then nodded.

Okay, it meant. Go on.

“King of cups. Your soulmate is very in touch with their emotions. They’re going to teach you how to open up more since it’s difficult for you to express what you’re feeling.” Doyoung tightened his lips before he could wrongfully deny it. On his left, Jaemin was already sleeping with his head on the table.

_____

January 1st 2:23 pm

"Will we know right away that we're each other's soulmate?"

The Lady smiled and nodded at your widened and curious eyes.

"You have an intense soul connection. Also, you’ll know right away because sex-,” You gulped. “-is going to be the best you’ve ever had in your whole life. He’s a very fiery person and is quite domineering, I can tell it from the King of swords. He wants to dominate you in bed, maybe pull your hair? You love it. And he definitely loves your body, especially legs and chest. He worships you and he will put you on a pedestal.”

You felt your face warm up so you put your palms on your cheeks, trying hard to process all of that information.

The woman continued after a little giggle to herself. “He can come off a little cocky. He thinks he’s very good in bed thanks to his natural attributes but that’s just because he’s a little insecure. Maybe consider reassuring him that he’s making you feel good?”

Your mouth was dry and you automatically nodded.

“Wait, what do you mean with- uh-- with natural attributes?”

_____

Sometime in June

“Did you hear about the guy accused of stealing because it looked like he had something in his pocket while in reality, it was his 10 inches monster?” Jaemin asked before laughing like a supervillain, head thrown back on the couch cushions, splattering spit all over Doyoung who was sitting near him with furrowed eyebrows as he tried to find a good movie to watch.

“Yeah, it was me,” Doyoung replied with a monotone voice.

“Oh? Doyoung made a joke? I guess I might say that you’re-- cocky?”

Doyoung chuckled even if he tried not to.

“Okay, since you’re in a good mood-,” the other clapped his hands once. “No.” “You don’t even know what I wanted to ask you!” Jaemin whined. “I’m busy.” “You don’t do anything all day.” “I have to take care of my monster cock-” Jaemin slapped Doyoung’s mouth to cover it. “It hurts,” he mumbled.

“Listen. Next Sunday you’ll accompany me at the opening of a new winery. You don’t have to do anything besides be pretty and drink wine while I try to get between one of the associates’ legs.” “I knew it had to do with pussy.” “She invited me! It’s not like I can refuse. I’ve had a crush on her ever since I met her at that work meeting.” “You mean a few days ago?” “Love has no stages.” “Why do I have to come with you?” “I have two invitations. Drinking expensive wine for free? Hello? I’m doing you a favour," he spoke quickly and dramatically, clicking his fingers. “You need three invitations, for me and my co--ahi!” Doyoung giggled after Jaemin smacked him with a cushion.

_____

You had no idea you’d be having backseat sex that day and honestly, you felt highly unprepared.

Black ripped jeans and a leather jacket, the most basic outfit one guy could have on, yet you were salivating and for once it was not because of the pizza Jeno was handing you.

“Uhm, Houston?” he clicked his fingers in front of your face then looked into the direction you were looking.

“The guy on the right?” he asked without batting an eye. “How did you know?” you turned your head suddenly to face him and he put the slice of pizza inside of your open mouth. Then he rolled his eyes.

“He’s completely your type.” "I want to fuck him."

Jeno raised one eyebrow and you suddenly realized what you've just said.

"No. I meant-," "Hey! Guy with the rabbit mask!" Jeno suddenly yelled at the group of boys sitting on the grass in front of you. "What the fuck are you doing? Are you stupid?" you pulled his arm down. "My friend here said that she wants to f-," you slammed a hand on his mouth before he could finish. "I'm going to kill you," you whispered as Jeno started to giggle.

The Rabbit boy looked at you for a little while, tilting his head to the side, but then turned his back to you. He probably didn't hear anything and thought that you were all drunk.

“What the fuck was that?” you whispered.

Jeno sighed. “Y/N. You’re too shy. If you want to fuck a guy just go and do it."

You scoffed. “I’m too shy? I am not shy. I can fuck whoever I want.” “Yeah? Then fuck the Rabbit.”

You crossed your arms on your chest and put your tongue in your cheek.

“Can’t do it huh?” Jeno teased you. "I can. And I will." "I bet you can't." "I bet I will."

_____

“I’ll be honest with you. I’m here because of a bet.” The Rabbit had a gulp of beer as if girls with a Moon mask approached him with bet talk every day. Then he giggled.

“Sorry, your mask is ridiculous.”

You rolled your eyes even if he couldn’t see it.

Okay, he was a douche. Did you still want to fuck him though? Yes.

“What’s the bet about?” he inquired.

You straightened your lips in a tight line, the sound of your pulse almost audible in the silence of the parking lot.

“MyfriendsaidthatIwouldn’tbeabletofuckyoubecauseI’mshyandIwanttoprovetohimthatI’mnot.”

You spitted everything out thanks to the gigantic amounts of wine you had that night and found yourself panting a little when you were done. A little voice inside your head was screaming that it was dangerous and highly inappropriate for you to behave like that but you shrugged internally and hit it in the face.

“What?” the dude asked after a beat.

You sighed. “MyfriendsaidthatIw-” “Okay, okay,” he raised his palms, “hold up. Talk slowly? Your friend what?” “Myfriendsaid-” “Can you just talk slowly, please?”

“Nevermind,” you turned your back to him and walked away.

“Mooney, come back here.”

You stopped. “How did you just call me?”

The guy straightened his back and laughed under his mask. “If you want to fuck me, at least try and seduce me first.” “Aren’t you already under my spell if you’re so eager to keep going on with this conversation?” you found yourself saying. He shrugged. “I’m just bored. And don’t you want to win that bet? I guess you’re actually shy and your friend was right.” You scoffed. “I’m not gullible. You won’t make me do things only because you told me that I can’t.” “You’re here doing a thing only because your friend told you that you can’t. How is that not being gullible?” “It’s not being gullible if I’m here with that as an excuse when in reality I want to fuck you on the backseat, Rabbit.”

You couldn’t see his face but you knew he was smiling as he opened the car’s door and with a dramatic gesture he invited you in.

You walked in front of him slowly, asking yourself what the fuck you were actually doing, and he was quick to follow you inside.

It was dark and warm and you decided to lie to yourself that the trembling sigh that escaped your lips was because you’ve been feeling cold before and not because you felt the Rabbit’s hands on your waist. You let him pull you in his lap and his palms slowly brushed your goosebumpy thighs first, then your torso, hovering over your breasts before they could grab your mask and take it away. You were breathing through your mouth and you desperately needed to see his expression upon seeing your face. With trembling fingers, you pulled the little white rabbit down and his eyes made an appearance first forcing you to inhale sharply. Masks slipping on the side, you both took in the view of each other. He did not speak a word and you didn’t either.

“Do-,” you started unsurely, “do we know each other? Have we met before?”

He blinked at you and you could tell he was as confused as you were. “I don’t think so,” he whispered and you finally realized how close he was.

Like a switch, when you moved he moved as well and you roughly hit your mouths together, his hands cupping your ass and your fingers curling in his hair. It was so fast and almost painful the way you embraced each other that you wondered just how horny some wine could make you become. He grunted as you suddenly bit his neck and just that sound made your blood boil. You knew how and where to touch him and when his fingers got underneath your dress it seemed like he knew your weak spots as well. You let go of his neck and grabbed his head as your nipples disappeared inside his mouth. His lips were cold just like his touch and it made you shiver.

_____

Doyoung noticed you the exact moment you walked onto the lawn.

Your legs were bare and he wondered why Jaemin dragged him to such a weird party.

“Just buy whatever,” the younger said behind a black ominous mask while examining himself in the mirror.

Doyoung hummed pensively and grabbed the white Rabbit.

“I wanted that one too but since I’m going to see the associate lady tonight again, I thought that something less stupid would be better,” commented Jaemin.

“So you think this is stupid?”

“It goes well with your vibe. Buy it,” he wiggled his eyebrows and for once Doyoung just sighed and shrugged.

“Ah come on, why are you not in a good mood tonight? We’ll have free food and alcohol tonight then free food and wine tomorrow.”

“I really don’t feel like coming. It makes no sense to throw a party before a party. I can’t believe you tricked me into coming to two parties.”

It was Jaemin’s turn to shrug. “These people have been travelling through all of Europe and shit. It’s their version of an afterparty. Like a rave. But it’s before the actual party and it’s on grass, with masks on and at 5 pm. You have to come.” "So there's going to be classical music and tea?"

The cashier ringed their items quickly and Jaemin took out his wallet to pay. “Why do you even get invited to all of these events?” Doyoung went on and added a pack of mints too. Jaemin smirked. “She likes me a lot, huh? Can’t wait to taste that sweet juicy pussy.” The cashier cleared her throat and was quick to dismiss them with her rightfully dry “have a good day”. “I just think she’s trying to gather customers for her wine. Don’t get your hopes up.” “She’ll want to gift me her wine after I’ll make her boun-”

Doyoung was so ready to accept an evening of him wandering around a party full of strangers talking in god knows what languages while his friend got it wet that when you pressed yourself on his crotch, nibbling at his neck and exhaling so deeply, he felt lightheaded.

You were with another guy and Doyoung watched you sit down on the cushions behind his group of friends. Your nude legs got even nuder as your white dress shifted up exposing your thighs. A sudden urge to spread them invaded his mind and he had to do something with his hands instead.

“Hey, guy with the rabbit mask!”

Doyoung turned his head around right in time to see you smack the dude on the face.

“Did that guy just tell you that his friend wants to fuck you?” Jaemin inquired with a giggle. Doyoung wondered how Jaemin could hear something like that at such a distance.

“I guess?” he agreed though. “And I want to fuck her too,” he heard himself add.

Jaemin’s mask looked as shocked as his expression underneath it.

“Why are you so bold all of a sudden? No, I mean, yes! Fuck her.”

Doyoung shook his head to get rid of the imaginary fog. “I was joking. Why are you getting so worked up?”

But when Jaemin finally disappeared suddenly, presumably to drink some wine with his lady, Doyoung could physically feel your eyes on his back as he walked down the hill towards the parking lot.

Your steps were light and you’d stop when he’d stop, unsuccessfully hiding behind the tall bushes of roses.

As he unlocked his car with a high toned beep, he leaned on the side of it and waited for you to approach him. A giggle left his chest when he saw you trying to find him in the middle of all of those cars.

“I am here,” he announced and you jolted.

Turning around you eyed him and stopped in place then took a timid step, then another until only a few separated you from him.

“I’ll be honest with you. I’m here because of a bet.”

You looked airy just like the moon on your mask and he thought you were adorable swinging your body weight from one foot to another like that.

“Sorry, your mask is-,” adorable, “-ridiculous. What’s the bet about?”

“My friend said that I wouldn’t be able to fuck you because I’m shy and I want to prove to him that I’m not.”

You were so bold that Doyoung felt his air miss from his lungs.

You slurred your words on purpose and he tried hard to pretend that he didn’t understand just to hear you say that you wanted him to fuck you again.

“What?” he asked.

You sighed. “MyfriendsaidthatIw-” “Okay, okay,” he raised his palms, “hold up. Talk slowly? Your friend what?” “Myfriendsaid-” “Can you just talk slowly, please?” “Nevermind.”

Fuck.

“Mooney, come back here.”

The air rustled with energy and he completely missed everything besides “I want to fuck you on the backseat” part and he had no idea how you got into the car and how he got you on his legs.

But now there you were, soft in his arms.

And when you took away your mask his head got drilled by a thousand questions. Your eyes, mirroring his expression as you slid his mask down, told him that you were thinking the same thing. Like two magnets you collided in a heated kiss and your scent was so familiar that Doyoung sighed when you let his lips go to breathe.

_____

Finally, finally, finally, your mind was chanting as the Rabbit moulded your body with his hands.

Your mind became mush so quickly that it was honestly embarrassing when you realized that you were riding his hardened cock. His lips on your neck seemed amused and after a moment he took away his fingers from your body, leaning back and watching you from under heavy lids.

You bit your lower lip and stopped with a certain difficulty, the burning sensation between your legs already boiling inside your veins.

"Go on."

His voice was sultry and raspy and your body reacted to it as if under a spell.

Your fingers on his shoulders deepened their hold and you closed your eyes for a brief moment before opening them again.

"Come on. Go on. Doesn't it feel good?"

He cooed, dragging one single finger across your bust, between your breasts and down on your stomach. His eyes wouldn't let a single expression of yours escape them.

"It would feel better if you fucked me."

The light in his irises twinkled.

"But I like to see you like this," he said before leaning in and letting his breath caressing your ear. "Desperate."

His voice was like a hiss and your skin shivered with goosebumps. You felt his open mouth on your nude shoulder, slowly going towards your clavicle and you extended your neck up to welcome him.

"Go on," he ordered again and your hips snapped, rolling on him, feeling the way your panties got pulled up as he slid his hands under your dress and twirled the sides around his fingers. It was frustrating as intoxicating and soon enough the windows of his car became misty from your heavy breaths.

"I hate this," you whined and he chuckled. "I can see that."

Almost completely lost in your foggy mind you jolted at a sudden snap and you stopped your motions just to see him slide your panties from between your legs and throw them to the front.

With a single pull, he pushed your now raw pussy on his clothed cock while his hands spread your ass, guiding your movements.

"Fuck," you gasped, feeling the rough material on your sensitive skin and it didn't take you a lot to go over the edge with fingers curled inside his hair and mouths open against each other. He drank your shaking moans, then without giving you a second to remember where you were, his arms wrapped your torso and pushed you under his weight. Your feet stopped on the window as you yelped and you desperately wanted to call his name when you felt his tongue lap at your wetness. His fingers were tightly wrapped around your thighs and when you moaned a few times in a row, your back arching and your body squirming in his hold, he palmed your stomach and pressed you down again.

_____

You looked like every sex dream Doyoung has ever had.

Arms thrown around your head, chest rising and falling, your sweet whimpers and soft skin, it drove him crazy. Your thighs pressing on the side of his head felt like everything he has ever wanted but wasn’t aware of.

Mine mine mine all mine. A weird possession sentiment swept him away and when he looked up at your fucked up expression he felt like shivering. With a plop he let your clit go and kept pumping his fingers inside of you, curling them right where you wanted him to, kissing your navel, licking your under breasts, sucking the skin in until it probably hurt, then sucking on your nipples, and finally on your lower lip. He wanted to see your face when you’d cum all over his fingers and when you gasped, wrapping his torso with your arms and trying to hide your face into the crook of his neck, he grabbed your chin and made you look at him. Your eyelids fluttered as he heard you swear multiple times and as he felt you clench so deliciously that he couldn’t wait to feel it around his aching cock instead. He wanted to rest a bit, maybe put his head on your soft chest and listen to your heartbeats but you were a stranger and you were hooking up in his car. So he sat on his knees between your legs instead, panting as if he were the one who just came, and he let his eyes trail on your naked body, licking his lower lip when he reached your wet core. He would have wanted to smear all of that on himself but he reached his jacket instead and took a condom out.

“Why do boys always carry a condom with them? You never know when you’d end up fucking?”

“Actually, when we carry a condom we never fuck and when we don’t have it we have the opportunity to fuck.”

“Well, today you’re lucky,” you smirked and he loved the way you tried to hide away your embarrassment with banter.

“Do you still want to do this?” he palmed your knee.

“Yes,” you nodded. “You didn’t cum.”

“You don’t have to worry about that. Do you want it?”

Doyoung wondered what kind of expression he had on to make you light up so much.

You bit your lower lip and sat up suddenly, getting on your knees as well and turning around with a certain difficulty.

“Yes,” you said again and bent over.

Doyoung choked at the view and wondered what country he had saved in his previous life to deserve all of that.

_____

You dreamt about opening a winery probably since you tasted wine for the first time.

You loved it.

Sour, sweet, bitter, flowery, fruity, still and frizzy, you loved it all.

People thought you were crazy and no one supported you until you met your best friend in university.

“Are you kidding? I’d love to open a winery with you.”

The classroom was well lit and she looked like an angel against the sunny windows.

You looked at her with wide eyes. “Really?”

She hit your arm playfully. “Of course! I love wine and that sounds like a very cool idea.”

“Look, I’m actually very serious about this so if you’re saying this just to-,”

She took your hands and looked into your eyes. “Me too. We’ll do it. I promise.”

Now, years later you were looking around at the freshly painted venue and couldn’t believe your eyes.

You did it.

Tall ceilings and shelves full of your blood and sweat, you walked around slowly, one finger to gently tap on the various displayed bottles.

“Hey, hey, no touching. We’ve cleaned them up and they have to shine.”

Your friend appeared on your side and you smiled. Her dress was sleeveless and you made a face touching her arms.

“Have you been working out girl? What are these?”

She snapped her head down to look at herself. “I guess… uhm, it’s all of the exercises… uhm that I do.”

You took her sudden panic for embarrassment and cackled. “With the party guy?”

“Who?”

“Jaemin you said?” “Oh yeah! Yeah, we’re quite active, aha.”

“Well, to get those arms you might have done a lot of hardcore BDSM.” You laughed but your friend looked rather mortified.

“Aw, come on,” you gently elbowed her. “I also fucked the guy from yesterday,” you added to make her feel better. And she lit up so much at the news that she almost knocked over the bottles in front of you.

“And you tell me now? How did it go?” “Well, I guess. I don’t really want to think about it though. I don’t think I’m into hookups.”

_____

Doyoung didn't like hookups but when he stepped inside the winery's main hall and saw your legs again and the way your ass was wrapped in that short dress he desperately wanted to bury his cock in it.

"Not bad, huh?" Jaemin smiled at the waiter welcoming them with glasses of wine, before looking up at the nicely decorated venue.

"Yeah, not bad at all," Doyoung murmured as you turned around and he considered fucking your breasts too.

Then he cleared his throat as he took a glass of wine as well, feeling his neck warming up. He looked around as he sipped, suddenly conscious of people as if they could read his horny mind. At that moment, with his body acting up as if possessed, he wondered if the wine didn’t have some sort of aphrodisiac in it.

“Do you also feel a little funny?” Doyoung placed down the wine and reached for his tie to loosen it up.

Jaemin glanced over him and promptly looked down. “Uh-oh. Do we have an emergency?” he started to laugh and Doyoung closed his eyes briefly before opening them and turning around towards the buffet.

“Heh, did that girl do something to you? You were so upset when she left without saying anything.”

“It was just a hookup,” Doyoung murmured trying to understand what kind of food he was staring at.

“An amazing hookup if you get like this upon seeing her.”

“Not for her I guess.”

“So you are upset. Cupid worked hard last night,” he elbowed his friend.

“Give me a break. You’re also crushing on your lady.”

“Also? Kim Doyoung, are you crushing on the winery girl?”

He shook his head quickly putting a pastry in his mouth to have an excuse to not speak. Jaemin lightly hit him and Doyoung hit him back like kids in third grade when suddenly the lights became dimmer and you spoke into a mic.

_____

“Hey, have you seen Jeno?” you asked your friend after finishing your introductory discourse and let people finally get wasted as they wanted to. “Who?” “Jeno? The guy I’m always hanging out with? He should have been here by now but I don’t see him anywhere.”

Your friend made a perplexed face and you sighed. “You’re right. You’ve never met him before. You’re both my best friends so I always forget that you’ve never seen each other.”

“Well, I kinda know how he looks like, so if I see him then-,”

"So you stole my money,” a sudden voice at your back interrupted you and you turned around to lock eyes with none other than the Rabbit.

He was so good looking that you felt the urge to kiss him, yet his mocking face made you so irrationally mad that you felt like slapping him too.

You put your hands on your hips and raised your chin. "Proof?"

You were still panting last evening trying hard to stop shaking from your third orgasm in a row. The Rabbit did a lot of things to you and you wondered why you didn’t hook up with strangers more often if that was the outcome. His wallet was on the seat in front of you and for a split second, you smiled wondering if he carried a family photo in it. His back looked very broad as he stood outside the car and presumably tried to make himself pee with a half-hard penis but probably failing. A sudden voice startled you and Doyoung replied to it. You quickly pulled down your dress and eyed the ripped panties on the steering wheel. Shit. You tried to grab them but the dude talking to Doyoung took a few steps closer so you retreated. "Fucked her good just like you planned?" Your face scrunched in a pout and you suddenly found yourself very upset. Doyoung didn't reply anything but you weren't sure that he didn't make a face. It was a good night. You had fun and a good-looking dude made you cum. You fucked him good just like you planned too. Then why did you feel a little used? Maybe you weren’t acquainted with the hookup culture, or maybe deep down you hoped that the sudden attraction you felt for the Rabbit was magical, but suddenly you felt very weird and a wave of disgust invaded you.

He was definitely not your soulmate and you should just get out of there.

You opened the door slowly on your side, quietly looking over your shoulder to make sure that they wouldn’t hear you. Feet on the ground you eyed the wallet again and you opened it. Not to check his family photo as you previously wanted to, but to get all of his cash. You swallowed a chuckle and ran away up the hill back to the restaurant’s garden.

He scoffed. "You’re a terrible thief. I make you cum and you steal from me?"

"You look like a rich guy. You deserved it. Also, you ripped my panties."

"And you liked it."

You clenched your jaw. "It wasn't even good sex."

His jaw's muscles flinched too. "You probably couldn't walk properly."

"Yeah, because of the cramped car not because of your cock."

"I think you have a loss of memory all of a sudden. Do I have to remind you how my cock feels like?"

"Sure. Then I will be able to say to your face that it doesn’t feel good.”

_____

"Fuck, it feels so fucking good."

Dragging you by the wrist, Doyoung shoved you in the first room he found and pressed you against the cold wall.

"I can't believe I'm about to have sex in the rosés showroom," you spoke with a breathy voice and when Doyoung pressed his open lips on yours you realized that you didn’t even know his name.

One thing is hooking up with a dude in his car while drunk, another thing is choosing to fuck him consciously on the opening of your new business and completely sober.

Although, when he started to kiss your jaw and neck, his tongue slowly creeping out and tickling your nerves, your mind felt so hazy that you wondered if you somehow had something to drink already and couldn’t remember.

Didn’t you hate the guy just a few moments ago?

“Do you really have to wear these dresses and drive me insane?” he whispered on your lips as his hands pulled up the dress in question.

You wanted to reply with something smartass but honestly, you chose that dress with him in mind.

Somehow, while browsing your closet for the big day, your mind could not stop thinking about the Rabbit boy. Your mixed feelings towards him confused you and you'd go on weird tangents of complete hatred and high adoration thinking about his face between your legs.

Certain that he’d come to the opening too, you carefully wore each piece of clothing you had, looking at yourself in the mirror and imagining he was the one looking at you through your eyes. Would he like the split on your thigh? Or would he like the way the dress accentuated your breasts more? Without realizing your hands were on your bust going up slowly, gently kneading your soft skin, cupping your boobs and flicking your nipples. Then one moved on your stomach, then on your thigh and just like that you started to moan.

And you were moaning at that moment too as the Rabbit lightly caressed your clit with the tip of his cock. You pushed your hips towards him to get more and he pushed you back into the wall, one hand reaching for your mouth and slipping the thumb on your tongue. You twirled it around his digit and sucked, lightly choking when he reached farther and choking again when you finally felt his cock fill you up too.

“You have to be quiet, Y/N.”

Your name on his lips made you tremble.

He probably heard it during the welcoming discourse or read it on the pamphlets and the fact that he knew it and you didn’t know his one, made you feel vulnerable in a pleasant way.

Or maybe it was the way his hand gripped the softness of your thigh, keeping it up on his hip, or maybe his own hips pushing inside of you that made you feel like turning into mush.

“Will you be quiet for me or am I fucking you too good?” he took away his finger and you gasped for air, your whines getting louder.

“As I thought,” he mocked you. “It wasn’t even good sex, she said.”

You bit your lower lip and hid your face into the crook of his neck but he pulled you away, cupping your cheek. “You have to look at me. I want to see this pretty face when you cum.”

Your eyes fluttered as his cock basically decided to rearrange your guts and you dug your fingers into his shoulders with a teeth-gritted moan.

“Are you close, baby?” You nodded breathlessly, the sudden pet-name just making it impossible for you to not beg to make you cum.

“You want me to make you cum?”

You nodded again. “Gonna cum- so hard-,”

The Rabbit thrust a few times more into you and suddenly pulled out.

You gasped as if mortally offended but unable to move a muscle.

"I don't think so."

His smirk made you swallow your own spit and he held your waist when he took a step back after letting your leg down.

“Hey! Come on!”

Dragging you away just like before he made you walk towards the party hall. His iron grip made it impossible for you to just go away and finish yourself and honestly, it would have been quite pathetic.

You moved as if drunk, fingers visibly shaking and mind clouded in the middle of the crowd.

"Fuck, I'll make you pay for this."

He smiled at you and intertwined his fingers with yours before lifting both of your hands and placing a kiss on your knuckles.

"Yes darling, I've already paid last time," he replied as a few curious people looked your way and saw just a random couple chatting peacefully.

You took a deep breath and tried to smile unbothered, imitating Doyoung's relaxed expression.

"It was just a joke. Do you want those couple of bucks back?”

He tilted his head to the side. “No. Let’s say I had paid you for your services.”

You disregarded him and opened your clutch, retrieving a few dollars. With a quick hand, you shoved them halfway inside Doyoung's pants making sure others didn't stare.

"Thank you for today’s fuck too then, slut."

_____

To say that it was easy for Doyoung to stop feeling you around his cock and pretend he wasn’t about to lose his mind when he couldn’t cum either, would be the biggest lie of the universe. But your frustrated expression, trembling limbs and glossy eyes made it all worth it.

“Where have you been?”

Jaemin handed him a glass of white wine and Doyoung took it absentmindedly. When he brought it to his mouth and had a sip he almost spit it back inside.

“What the fuck is this?”

Jaemin chuckled. “The winery’s speciality.”

“This is disgusting.”

“I had a whole bottle of that yesterday so now I’m used to it.”

“Why is it so sour?”

Jaemin hit his shoulder lightly to bring his attention to something and when Doyoung raised his gaze he saw your furious aura staring at them from a few steps away.

“Maybe the lady behind the recipe is sour as well,” he joked. “I lied when I asked you where you’ve been. Saw you together just now. Did you not fuck her good enough?”

Doyoung smiled and took another sip of the wine, barely being able to not make a face for a second time. “I fucked her so good that now she’s mad.”

“From her expression, she doesn’t look very pleased with the experience. And in fact,” Jaemin added quickly, grabbing Doyoung’s arm since he got distracted by the red wine, “she’s probably seeking a better one.”

You were chuckling at some dude’s pick-up line and accepted to disappear with him out of Doyoung’s sight.

The sweet dessert wine he tasted felt as sour as the first one.

_____

“Is the person I’m thinking about my soulmate?” “You already know the answer to that.”

You bit your lower lip unsure.

“What do you want me to say?” the lady smiled. “Yes or no.” “Why don’t you have faith?”

You leaned back in your chair and let your gaze fall on the decorations on the tarot reader’s desk. The little obsidian stones reminded you of the dude’s eyes and it made you irrationally angry.

You wanted to make him jealous.

You wanted him to come up to you and grab your hand or something and make the boring-ass guy that approached you to leave.

But he didn’t.

If he really were your soulmate, wouldn’t you both feel it? Were you just going crazy? Were you lonely enough that you weighed your every desire on him?

“I saw him just twice and I don’t even know his name,” you sighed, talking almost to yourself.

You probably unconsciously pouted because the Lady smiled kindly at you. She was no therapist but she gladly accepted to talk to you again after your first encounter.

“Does he match the description the cards gave you?”

“Well, he does have a very big cock, yeah,” you started. “Uhm, yes, it was that type of meeting,” you explained quickly before she could judge but the woman didn’t look unfazed. In fact, she was quite pleased to hear that.

“You think that meeting your soulmate is just seeing them and everything falls into place. But it’s harder than that. You still have to want it and you still have to work for the union. So many people missed the opportunity to get with their soulmate because they didn’t work hard enough.”

“Well, shouldn’t this be meant to be or something? Even if I make mistakes?”

The Lady tilted the head to the side and for a split second you felt as if talking to a lost best friend. “We have a lot of choice in life. Everything is out there ready for you and you will get help but only if you have faith it will happen.”

_____

“You again?” he asked, fakely annoyed.

You’ve always brushed off your mom’s words.

“At least take your sweatpants out of your knee-high socks.” “It’s just the convenience store at the corner, mom. It’s not like I will meet my soulmate tonight at 10 pm.”

But you actually met him and it was terrible.

The packs of instant ramen in your hands trembled a little as the Rabbit dude passed one hand through his hair waiting for a normal human reaction from you.

“What are you doing here?”

“Buying groceries for dinner,” he explained then eyed your snacks. “You too, I see.”

You tried to not let his subtle mockery get to you. “Yeah but why in this store in particular?”

“You’re wondering if this is fate?” he giggled.

But actually, Doyoung was the first to wonder if it was fate.

He has never really thought of the Lady’s words in detail, nor he believed in any of it, but when he first saw you descending the hill with your moon costume as if you were the actual moon, his mind independently carved the thought of how nice it would be for you to be his soulmate.

“I live in this neighbourhood and I assume you do too since you’re dressed like this,” he let his eyes fall and he looked at your stained pyjama pants.

A wave of heat passed through your whole body and for the first time, it wasn’t pleasure.

Your real soulmate would have never said that.

Embarrassed, you cleared your throat.

“Well, see you around then.” Turning on your heels, you didn’t wait for him to greet you back.

“Did that guy make you cum?”

You stopped so suddenly that the first two packs of ramen fell to your feet. You grunted and tried to bend but it was impossible to grab them without making the others fall too. With the corner of your eye, you saw the rabbit boy’s hands retrieving your stuff and when he got up again you felt his skin on the back of your hands as he pulled the remaining packs from you and let them fall in his cart. “Thank you.”

“Answer my question.”

You gulped but put on a brave face.

“This is not a conversation to have in the condiments aisle.” “Then come to my apartment.”

The intensity in his voice made your heart beat faster and then you blinked at his back as he turned around the cart and made his way towards the register.

“Wait, my ramen!”

He didn’t acknowledge you and greeted the cashier good evening. You awkwardly stood beside him as they beeped all of his fancy groceries.

“Uhm-,” you extended your hands to get your ramen but they beeped that too without batting an eye and the rabbit bagged everything in a few seconds.

“I- I could have- why-?” you followed him. “Now I have to pay you back.” “You gave me enough money last time.”

You crossed your arms on your chest as Doyoung placed the bags inside his car's trunk.

“That was for-,” you started but stopped realizing that you were about to talk about sex on a busy street in front of your corner grocery store.

He smiled. “Yeah?”

“Give me my ramen now.”

“Get inside,” he indicated with his head and without missing a beat he got behind the wheel.

“Why do you even drive if you live in the neighbourhood?” You entered and sighed, trying to put on the seat belt. “The groceries are heavy.” “Do you even lift?” “I love lifting women but not groceries.” “You lift other women and I can’t get a guy to make me cum without you asking me questions about it?”

Doyoung looked at you with a little smile as you stopped at the red sign. “Does the thought of me with other women make you upset or am I imagining things?” “Does the thought of guys making me cum make you upset?” you retorted. “Yes.”

You choked on air and the movement of the car starting again made your body press back on the seat. You didn’t expect that.

“Then why did you make me leave with him?”

Your voice got tiny and you hoped he didn’t actually hear you because at the same moment you realized that it was a little embarrassing. But his sudden glance told you that he did. His gaze returned towards the street and his adam apple travelling up and down his throat told you that he didn’t know what to say.

“Why did you leave with him?” he eventually asked.

It was your turn to not speak.

Not in a million years you’d admit to a stranger you wanted to make him jealous. A stranger that put his dick in you twice, but a stranger nevertheless.

“We just talked a bit. I was bored.” “So I guess he didn’t make you cum.” “I don’t do hookups,” you said before realizing what you’ve just said. “I mean-,” you looked at him and he blinked back. Fuck. You told the hookups guy that you didn’t do hookups.

“I mean, without being attracted to the person a lot. And that dude was not attractive,” you tried to explain fighting the urge to hide your face away.

“Thank you. I’m also crazily attracted to you.”

The car’s air became a little heavier and you thought that if you touched it with a single finger it would buzz as if made of electricity.

The walk to the apartment complex was almost urgent. His hands didn't leave your body once when you reached the elevator as if he suddenly forgot what personal space was and when you got to his door he firstly slammed you against it, hands quick to get under your shirt.

"Hey," you eyed the elevator's lights behind his back as he started to kiss your neck. "Someone's coming." "Let them come." The skin he sucked in made your eyes flutter and you whined feeling his fingers so close to where you needed them but so far away. "No, seriously. I think they're going to stop here." Doyoung hummed unbothered but you felt his hand press the code behind your back. Right when the elevator doors opened and you made eye contact with a cute little old lady, the door behind you opened too and you yelped falling backwards. Doyoung was quicker though and he held your waist, pulling you back into the kiss and closing the door with his heel.

Shoes off and no time wasted, you were suddenly bent over some sort of furniture and your pants got pulled down.

A single silent gasp left your mouth when you felt Doyoung's lips on the back of your thighs and when his fingertips grated at your sides pulling your panties down to your knees you started to pant. His hot breath tickled your pussy and you shifted in his hold. Doyoung's hands grabbed your ass to keep you in place and slapped one of your cheeks when he licked up a stripe between them.

You whined once and put your head down and closed your eyes, fingers mindlessly grabbing whatever Doyoung kept on the cabinet. When he pushed his fingers inside, your back arched and his cologne fell to the side with the cap open. The sudden scent of it made you even wetter and Doyoung hummed appreciatively with his mouth full.

"It feels so good," you whined again, imperceptibly grinding on him, brain not understanding when you got so horny all of a sudden.

"Please please please make me cum this time," you begged, looking behind you and seeing his hands spreading you all out for him before his fingers could find spots inside of you that you weren't aware of having.

"I kinda wish you'd beg some more," you heard the note of amusement in his voice.

His hands didn't stop though and before you could form any words your whole body contracted and lifted itself on the tiptoes, knees buckling and head light. Doyoung's airy breath met your spine and he held you in his arms to prevent you from slipping on the ground, kissing your back up slowly until meeting the shoulders.

"Good girl," he brushed your ear with his lips and you remained with your eyes closed, breathing heavily and when he made you turn around, you felt your body weak as if it was made of jello. He pulled you towards himself and you heard his chuckle buzz inside of his chest. In a second he threw you on his shoulder and you let out a little cry, your limbs dangling around him.

"I didn't know you were this strong."

He walked a few steps and turned left inside a dark corridor. You tried to look around but you barely noticed anything before he gently placed you down to sit on the bed.

"You don't know a lot of things about me."

When you raised your head to meet his face you smiled tiredly.

"I don't even know your name."

He tilted his head to the side amused. "Doyoung."

"Doyoung," you repeated, feeling the sounds on your tongue.

It felt very right.

Then his eyes fell on your naked legs and you sucked the air in, suddenly rolling in his bed, one piece of blanket to cover you up.

Doyoung, still standing by the bed, put his hands on the hips and furrowed his eyebrows.

"I'm here with my pussy all out. That's so embarrassing,” you explained.

"Yeah. I've just seen it up close just one minute ago."

"I'm having post nut clarity," you added, voice muffled and only the top of your head poking out the impromptu burrito.

"Well, I'm not having any post nut clarity since I didn't nut, so to me, it's not embarrassing."

"Oh my God you're right!" you eyed his crotch and sat up.

"It's alright. I didn’t plan to do anything else anyway. Just wanted to cook you dinner actually since I’ve already eaten," he sat near you chuckling and took off his shoes. "My mom would hit me in the head if she knew I walked up to the bedroom with these-," but then he gasped softly as you placed a kiss to his nape. Your arms wrapped his torso in a back hug just as your legs did with his waist, draping them in his thighs. His hands automatically started to palm your knees as you made your way towards the base of his neck.

“I don’t have any condoms,” he whispered as to stop you.

Your fingers found the hem of his shirt very quickly and you lifted it, loving the way it ruffled his hair after you threw it somewhere on the floor. Having his bare back in front of you made you lose track for a moment and when you touched his chest you realized it was the first time that you actually saw him naked.

“We don’t need them for what I want to do to you,” you murmured.

He breathed in shakily. “Well, we’re responsible adults so you have to know that I also don’t do hookups so I’m completely clean but if you don’t want to--ah shit-,” he almost whined when you let your hand down his abs to palm his crotch slowly.

He turned so cute all of sudden that your tummy did backflips as you kissed his jawline.

“Are you saying that you want to fuck me raw?” you whispered amused.

His cock twitched under his pants and he bit his lower lip.

“Does the thought turn you on, Doyoung? Feeling me around you, soft and wet until you can’t take it anymore? Huh?” You cooed, pouting your lips as you pronounced his name, savouring it on your tongue.

His breathing increased and you wondered how he still kept it all together.

“Cumming inside of me? Having your warm cum spill out-,”

He turned around suddenly and you let him push you down on the bed but only for a moment. The kisses you started to litter on his neck made his hold weaker and he threw his head into the pillow as you got on top of him. You kissed his chest slowly, then went down until you could finally pass your tongue on that single vein under his navel’s skin.

"I'm so on edge that I might cum only with a single touch," he breathed out and you smiled on his stomach at his honest side, whining a little when he slid his fingers into your hair as if to urge you to go on quicker.

"You should have told me," you sat on his thighs and slowly fumbled with his belt.

He bit his lower lip and watched the little show you put on for him.

"Well, now you know and you still want to torture me like this."

You lifted one corner of your mouth as you finally unbuttoned his pants.

"I think you deserve it, don't you think?"

He shook his head. "Not one bit. I've been good to you."

"Oh really? Then why don't you show me again what a good boy you can be and beg me to finally touch you?"

"You really think you can use my ways with me?"

You opened your mouth to reply but every word died in your throat as he reached down and pulled out his cock, pumping it up himself, a single shaking sigh of relief coming out of his mouth. "Shit-," he closed his eyes and pushed his head back, exposing his neck as his adam apple went up and down. You couldn't take your eyes off him and the sounds he started to make hit you right between the legs. His tip poked out of his fist as he fucked himself and for the first time in your life you were dying to suck a cock.

"Doyoung-," you breathed out but his hisses made you gulp, feeling your mouth dry at the sudden spurts of cum on his lower stomach.

"Shit," his chest rose and fell heavily and his eyes looked black underneath his heavy lids. Without being able to take it anymore you bent down and licked his tip sending shots of electricity through all of his body.

"Ah- Y/N-,"

You sucked his cock clean and, letting it out with a lewd pop, you smirked.

"Now you're going to take it."

And he took it well, cupping your head as it bobbed up and down, not without the most sinful sounds you've ever heard a man emit. As he placed his other hand on your cheek, you slid your own fingers down your stomach and reached your aching clit.

"Ride me?" he caressed your face with his thumbs and you looked up, basking in his fucked up expression.

With a wet sound, you let his cock out, licking his tip once to break the string of saliva attached to it and moved upwards on his body.

His hands were quick to grab your sides and when you started to grind on him he inhaled shakily, eyes piercing the way his shaft slid through your lips. Then he grabbed your shirt and roughly pulled it up, making you discard it in a second.

One hand to guide your ass and one hand to grope at your breasts and you were almost cumming again. And when he reached behind you and you felt his cock poke at your entrance you lost strength in your arms and leaned down on his chest, your breasts squeezed and your skin rubbing on each other when he started to thrust into you.

His hips' movements were deep and sharp and when you raised your bust enough for your nipples to rub on his chest he squeezed your ass and spanked it once making you moan loudly and fall back on him. So near to your orgasm, you dug your fingers into his arms not worrying about the little marks your nails left on his skin.

And then he stopped with a grunt.

You whined and opened your eyes to see him smirk.

"Fuck you, not again," you whispered breathlessly. "Yeah, fuck me."

And you bit your lower lip, lifting yourself up by putting your palms on his chest and started to bounce on his cock. Doyoung started to breathe with his mouth and he let his hands rest on his sides enjoying the way you were so desperately trying to chase your high.

Your thighs were burning and your mind was clouded but you didn't stop and when you started to call his name, Doyoung finally grabbed your waist again, taking the lead and finally sending you over the edge.

You finally cried out and pushed your face into the crook of his neck biting down on his skin as he kept going, not giving you a moment to breathe.

And when you heard him choke against your ear too, a string of profanities lingering in his lips you felt his hot cum fill you up, but getting slowly fucked back in with his last thrusts.

You remained like that both breathless for some time, his hands gently cupping your face to look at you. His eyebrows furrowed and he quickly dried your wet eyes.

"Are you okay? Was that too much?"

The concern in his voice made your heart swell and you shook your head.

"I'm feeling very good," you smiled and his expression relaxed a bit.

As he pulled out you felt his semen slide on your thigh and pool where your stomaches we're meeting.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, Doyoung. I was just getting frustrated as always when I’m around you.”

His hands went up and down your back as if soothing your skin. “I love how my name sounds on your lips. It feels like I’ve somehow waited my whole life to hear it.”

You blinked a few times, the sudden sweet words so weird in his mouth that you raised your head to look at him.

He looked back as shocked as you.

"Wow, I feel so sticky," he changed the subject as you opened your lips to talk. You eyed the little buds of sweat on his forehead and imagined you looked as spent as him.

"Are you also having post nut clarity?" "Yes. Everything is clear." "What's clear?" "This was one of the best nuts of my life and I want to do it again."

_____

Unable to stand on your own legs without shaking you remained sprawled on Doyoung's bed for a while, eyes heavy with sleep.

"The groceries are still in the car," he said while zipping his pants.

He offered to take a shower together but your growling tummy interrupted him so now you were alone in the bathtub, lazily lathering up your skin and waiting for him to come back from the parking lot.

Relaxed from the good fuck and the hot water, you looked around curious, checking out his toiletries as if they could tell you more about this mysterious Doyoung guy.

Perhaps it was too soon but as you collected the soapy water to blow on it you felt like falling in love a little.

A little smile crept on your lips when you heard the entrance door open and close with a thud and you looked in the mirror to check on yourself before Doyoung could barge in. As if he didn't fuck you while you were looking crazy just moments before that.

"That was very quick-," you started but squealed and put your hands on your chest as a man entered the bathroom not looking like your Doyoung at all.

"Oh my God!" the guy jumped back a little before starting to laugh.

"Who are you?"

"You scared the shit out of me. Why are you here in the dim light?" the young man kept going without answering.

You blinked at him. "It's relaxing."

"I'm Jaemin. Doyoung's flatmate," he finally explained and you wondered why he looked at you as if knowing you. "And you must be the winery girl."

You tilted your head to the side. "Winery girl? Do you know me?"

"I kinda go out with your friend? The other winery girl?"

You widened your eyes. "You're the BDSM guy?"

For the first time since he entered the bathroom, Jaemin looked flustered.

"Exactly what did she tell you about us?" he scratched the back of his head.

You giggled. "My friend has been very happy lately. I know enough to make sure you're treating her well."

Jaemin's eyes lit up and you thought he was so cute to have a crush on your friend. Your mind suddenly thought of Doyoung and wondered if he might have a crush on you too.

"Think of the devil," you murmured as Doyoung appeared behind Jaemin with the groceries bags.

"You were thinking of me?" he smiled then suddenly realized the whole situation. "Why the hell are you looking at my naked girl?" he tried to tackle the other. Jaemin chuckled and took a few steps back in the corridor.

"Had no idea she was here, I swear!"

_____

My girl.

You were sitting timidly at the dinner table, wearing Doyoung's clothes and looking at Jaemin's back as he prepared the food. The water running in the bathroom and Doyoung's faint singing voice made you chuckle.

He said, my girl.

You put your hands to your cheeks.

"You really like him."

You jolted and raised your head to see Jaemin comforting eyes.

Batting your lashes you wondered what kind of expression you had on and with a little note of panic, you wondered if it was that easy for Doyoung to see it too.

"This is a secret between us," Jaemin started lowering his voice, "but I think he likes you too. You really look like his soulmate now that I think about it."

You were about to melt but his last words made you snap out of the dream.

"His soulmate?" you questioned, suddenly very interested.

Jaemin shook his head as if to not give him any importance but upon seeing your curious eyes he placed the lid on the pot and sat down in front of you.

"So it was new years," he started and you gulped. He then stopped to giggle, remembering the scene as if it played in front of himself. "We were drunk as fuck. We went to like three different parties and I was wasted. I don't know if you're familiar with the place but there's a tarot reader downtown. We were bored so we decided to go there."

Your head felt suddenly very light. "And what happened?" you asked with a faint voice.

"Oh, we made a fool out of ourselves for sure, but the woman was nice and did a reading for Doyoung. I don't remember much but I kinda remember the physical descriptions. And you scarily look like that a lot."

You swallowed again and you felt your mouth dry.

"And does Doyoung remember?"

"Remember what?"

You gasped when Doyoung appeared on your side, a towel around his neck as he used one end to dry the back of his head.

"I was telling Y/N about the soulmate thing, you know? When the lady told you that they'd be coming around summer?"

Doyoung's pupils trembled a little but then he turned around and headed towards the fridge.

"Ah yeah. I don't believe any of that though," he said and poured himself a glass of water.

You looked at his profile as he drank and then noticed Jaemin's pitiful expression.

"I got a reading on new year's too in the exact same place," you confessed and the silence afterwards felt heavy.

"And your soulmate was someone that looks like me?" Doyoung joked and Jaemin giggled awkwardly.

Your heart stung very painfully but you let out a dry chuckle too.

“I don’t believe in it either. But it was very fun,” you lied.

“I should have done a reading too,” Jaemin commented.

"I'm starving," Doyoung lifted the lid and his friend got closer to stir again.

Their voices talking about ingredients felt muffled as you tried hard to swallow your stupid tears.

_____

You had no idea why you believed the soulmates story.

Maybe you were lonely or just plain bored but the idea of having a designated person you could be with during your lifetime felt very comforting. Especially since the Lady told you to have faith.

Doyoung seemed to fit every category and you were so insanely attracted to him that it did not make sense for him to not be your soulmate. But do soulmates appear then disappear from your life, leaving behind nothing besides your memories of them?

Maybe you should have given him your number after you left his apartment that night, but reflecting about it with a cold mind, you did well to not seek him out given his reaction to the whole soulmates discourse.

He was definitely not your soulmate. It shouldn’t have been this hard.

Looking at your desk you sighed at the amount of work you had to do for the day and you imagined Doyoung walking through your door just like soulmates in movies would do. Then you shook your head trying to get those intrusive thoughts out of your head.

Enough.

But it was so difficult, especially as your eyes kept falling on his cologne, partially hidden behind your pens.

You grabbed it suddenly intending to throw it out.

"Oh sorry, I made this fall," you eyed the bottle of perfume on the cabinet by the entrance as you put on your shoes. With quick hands you grabbed it but before placing the cap on, you brought it to your face and smelled it again. "It's very nice." Doyoung, seeing you out, was leaning on the wall. "Do you like it?" You nodded. "You can keep it." You hesitated, wondering if he was joking or not. "Think of me," his eyebrows wiggled amused and if you wouldn't have been so exhausted you would have begged him to take you against the same cabinet again.

Now, eyes closed, you were thinking of him indeed as you smelled that cologne, a shy hand slowly creeping up your thigh.

No. You weren't about to masturbate at work but the temptation was so big that you jolted as if awoken from a dream when your phone rang.

You breathed in and out as if to calm down and picked it up.

"Y/N speaking."

"Hi, soulmate."

His voice made you physically shiver and your heart started to beat so fast inside your ears that you were afraid Doyoung could hear it too.

"How did you get my number?"

"I don't have your number. This is the winery's one and I googled it."

You bit your lower lip feeling stupid.

"Yeah, yeah, you're right. Sorry, I'm a little tired."

"Have you been working a lot lately?"

"Yes," you replied and it was true, but it wasn't work that clouded and exhausted your mind.

"You need a pause then. Do you want me to help you relax?"

His low and amused tone made your legs shift and you changed their position.

"What do you have in mind?"

"Are you alone?"

"Yes," you almost whispered.

"Then close your eyes for me."

You did timidly and the increase of your breath probably was a confirmation for him that you listened because he went on soon after.

"Now touch your neck slowly with your fingertips. Go down to your clavicle then gently cup your breasts."

"This is making me shiver," you breathed out.

"Good. I bet you're wearing a thin bralette and your perked nipples are poking through."

You sighed as you touched them and smiled at Doyoung's correct intuition.

"Yes," you replied.

"Can you play with them as I would if I were there?"

You whined and bit your lower lip trying to resist the urge.

"Doyoung-," this is a little inappropriate and honestly, kinda rude of you, especially since you went mia suddenly and now you want to pick up from where you left, you intended to say but didn’t manage to.

"Do it," he commanded and your hand flew to your breasts and started to play with your nipples as if it didn't belong to you anymore.

"Good girl. Does it feel good?"

"Yes," you whispered.

"Speak up love."

"I can't be loud."

"Oh really? Then, now slip one hand under your panties and rub your clit. I bet you're soaking wet and let's see if you'll be able to not be loud."

His voice sounded like a hypnotic melody and you didn't even question it when you found yourself with the fingers gently pressing on your clit in little circles. Your breath got quicker and heavier, the grip on the phone was even stronger.

"Doyoung-,"

"Yes, babe? Does it feel good?" he cooed.

"It feels so fucking good-,"

"Can you slip a finger in for me too, love?"

You nodded even if he couldn't see you and you did as he wished, the stretch so unsatisfying in comparison to Doyoung's girth to make you whine frustrated.

"I- I wished you fucked me instead-,"

"Okay then," he replied calmly and for a split second, you wondered if the whole phone sex thing was not something you weren’t good at to make him reply so dryly when the door to your office opened and Doyoung took his tongue out at you.

His sudden presence made you so flustered that you promptly pulled your fingers away as if he caught you doing it instead of being the one ordering you around.

"What are you doing here?" you put your phone down with a shaking hand.

He walked lazily towards your desk and put a paper bag on it. "Brought you your clothes."

You looked at them. "How did you get in? My secretary-,"

"Told him I was your boyfriend."

You felt the air stop inside your lungs at his words but you couldn't do much as Doyoung suddenly bent down with hands on the desk and took your still wet fingers into his mouth.

You gasped softly as he sucked on them slowly, letting his tongue collect every single drop of your wetness, his deep eyes flickering with amusement at your visible lust.

And you were so horny that you didn't even question it when he grabbed your wrists and made you stand. You took a step towards him but he pulled you by the waist and turned you around, pushing you towards the desk with his hips and pressing himself into your ass until you were bent over.

"You look amazing like this, just like a little slut waiting for my cock, ain't I right?"

You gasped for air as he pressed one palm on your spine and the other slowly raised your skirt.

"You keep dressing like this at work. No wonder your secretary was so upset to hear that I was your boyfriend. Do you want us to put on a little show for him? So he knows his place."

His fingers drawing lines up and down your clothed pussy prevented you from forming any words and when you felt your panties slip to the side and heard Doyoung's zip you inhaled aching to feel him inside.

But he didn't touch you where you wanted him to.

"Answer me," he slapped your ass and you curved your neck up with a hiss.

"If you finally fuck me good enough perhaps I'll be loud enough for him to hear me."

Another slap.

"Are you being a brat now? Should I not make you cum just like-,"

"Nonononono please please no please--" the string of begging erupted out of you way too easily and it was interrupted by Doyoung's dry laugh and hard cock finally slipping inside.

You exhaled deeply and he grunted, bottoming out until you felt his hip bones on your ass.

He remained still then he snapped.

"Fuck fuck Doyoung--ah!" you cried out.

"Louder."

Your voice would have increased in volume without him ordering that but it certainly added to the whole desk creaking and skin slapping symphony.

One of his hands was palming your ass while the other pulled you towards him by the waist, but then he changed his mind and grabbed your arms by the elbows, pulling your torso up and making you curve your spine.

You cried out his name again and stared at his reflection in the window in front of you. Eyebrows furrowed and a couple of strands of his hair fallen from the styled fringe made his gaze even deeper when you locked eyes.

Then he smiled wickedly and a shiver shook your body knowing that nothing good will come out of that. And soon enough he let go of your arms and held your bust instead while the other wrapped your throat. You gasped for air and he attached his teeth to your shoulder sucking deeply and slowly, so different to the pace of his quick hips.

Your desk phone rang and Doyoung held you harder as an indication to not even think about it. Not that you even cared about besides the way his cock was stretching you all out.

The string of your choked moans just increased their tempo until you shuddered in his arms with a cry, so hard and so suddenly that his hips stopped and he let go of your throat in a second, holding your body and breathing deeply with you until you didn't whine anymore.

A kiss on the cheek then on the neck and you turned your head around, searching for his lips.

Your phone rang again and he smiled.

"Answer."

"But you're still-,"

He grabbed the phone, placing it to your ear and you had nothing else to do than breathe heavily and greet with a shaking and hoarse voice.

You understood the first three words of the person talking on the other side before Doyoung pushed you on the desk again and started to thrust into you, this time seeking his own high.

You gritted your teeth and rotated your torso to be able to place your palm on his stomach and push your nail into his shirt.

The look in your eyes just made him even more amused.

“Yes, yes, no, could you please repeat that?”

And even if the voice on the other line kindly repeated itself, your eyes rolled inside of your head and your body moved back and forth on the desk making you not understand a single thing.

It was so highly unprofessional and inappropriate that it made your blood boil with pleasure. You hung up, making a mental note to call back and use the ‘line went dead’ excuse.

Doyoung didn’t like that independence a single bit and he made sure to show you as you suddenly found yourself standing, no cock to stretch you out anymore and his hands on your waist turning your around.

“On your knees.”

You slipped down in front of him with hands on his stomach then you let them fall on his soft suit pants.

The veins on his hand were popping when he grabbed his cock and lightly hit your lips with its tip. You let out your tongue and let it bounce on it, leaning in to be able to catch in between your lips.

Doyoung tutted and took half a step back making your suck on air.

“When and how I say so,” he murmured and got closer again.

His other hand grabbed your head and kept you in place, fully controlling the way he pushed his shaft between your lips, slowly smearing his precum on them.

“I really want to let my cum slide down your throat right now.”

You opened your mouth eagerly and he smiled wickedly.

It reached the back of your throat in one go and you gagged, pressing your nails into his thighs. Heavy on your tongue, you couldn’t move so it was Doyoung to slowly thrust his hips, increasing his movements until you started to drool.

“Fuck, you’re so good-,”

Short-breathed and fingers tightening in your hair you could feel him reaching his orgasm soon.

You lifted your gaze up and when he pulled out to make your breath you cupped his balls with one hand and took him inside of your mouth again.

He choked and started to grunt, meeting your movements with his erratic ones until he went suddenly still and you whined feeling his cum hit the back of your throat.

You swallowed quickly making him hiss as he thrust a couple of times more and he pulled out slowly, a string of saliva and his seed to connect your tongue to his tip.

“You’re amazing. You know that?” he whispered with a raspy voice. His fingers caressed your cheeks and lips as you looked up at him panting.

_____

“Do you want me to hit him with my car?”

Knowing him, it wasn’t a joke so you lightly hit his thigh. “Jeno!”

He chuckled.

Meeting your soulmate - it should have been electrical, like two magnets meeting each other.

The first moment you saw his shoulders, you knew it was him. Before you even saw his face and learned his name, you sighed in relief. Finally, you’ve found him and you were at home.

Then why was it so difficult to just be with Doyoung?

He fucked you good and kissed your lips. He made sure you were okay after fucking your throat and even massaged your feet as you tried to catch your breath on the couch inside your office.

“Can you please bring us, like, something to drink and some snacks?” Doyoung opened the door and talked to a very mortified secretary.

“Sure,” he suddenly got up and looked around as if not knowing which planet he was on.

“Why are you torturing that poor boy?” you rolled your eyes when Doyoung plopped back on the couch near him. “Now he’ll want to resign from the job and he was quite good at it.”

“I think he liked it. I know a post nut face when I see one and he definitely had some fun under that desk.”

The secretary entered the office and his lips were tight as he placed the tray with coffee on the little table in front of you.

“Thank you,” you smiled kindly at him.

“No sugar for you ma’am and one sugar for you sir,” he announced before leaving as quickly as he came in.

You leaned in and took your mug, sighing when you felt it’s warmth heat your skin.

“How did he know I take my coffee with one sugar?” Doyoung furrowed his eyebrows while doing the same.

You looked at him and shrugged. “I told you he’s good at his job.”

And you were thankful that the boy didn’t leave because now as you talked to Jeno in your office, weeks after you’ve seen Doyoung in there, you really needed someone to do your job.

“I’m just not even concentrating much. I think I caught feelings for him while he only saw this as-- fucking,” you threw your hands in the air once and sighed, sitting down at your desk.

Jeno hummed pensively. “Well, he strikes me as someone too romantic for that. People who just hookup don’t behave as he does. They just fuck and leave.”

You rubbed the bridge of your nose. “I just think he was being considerate. You can’t fuck someone’s mouth then leave them there like that.”

Jeno hummed again. “But he did call you my girl and he called himself your boyfriend.”

You looked up. “My girl as the girl that I fuck and my boyfriend only to make the secretary let him in.”

Your friend pursed his lips as if considering that side of events.

“How do you even know all of these details? I don’t remember telling you any of this before,” you chuckled.

Jeno cleared his voice. “You told me. Are you having a loss of memory too now?”

You sighed. “Maybe.”

The young boy cleared his voice again. “Anyway! Plan. Send him nudes.”

“What?” you exclaimed.

You could go around your sweet friend Jeno suggesting you to fuck Doyoung when he was the Rabbit boy but suggesting you to send the dude nudes?

Seeing his pink cheeks Jeno must have suddenly realized what he has just said too and regretted it.

“Trust me. He’s an air sign. They like sexting and mind fucking and all of that stuff. Now I have to go.”

You looked at him standing up. “Since when are you into astrology? Also, where are you going? We were supposed to have lunch together!”

“Sext him and send him a good coochie pic. Bye, love you,” he left like the wind and you leaned back in your chair perplexed.

_____

"Do you trust me?"

"Yeah," his voice was a whisper and it got engulfed by the jingle of handcuffs in your hands.

You were so beautiful and intoxicating that Doyoung found himself having difficulties breathing when you slowly started to crawl on the bed towards him.

“I’m glad you wore the lingerie I sent you,” he whispered, hands reaching towards you to feel the material under his fingertips. But you grabbed them with a sudden force and Doyoung groaned, finding himself pinned to the bed instead.

“No touching,” you purred.

The young man sighed, feeling his cock twitching on his lower stomach.

You eyed it and smiled like a cat. “You want me to touch you, babe?”

Doyoung nodded. “Please?”

You licked your lips and leaned down, your lips so close to his cock to make him audible whine. A little bit. A little bit more and he would feel-

And then he woke up shaking in his bed.

“Shit.” Doyoung closed his eyes again, rolling on his back with a certain difficulty.

His cock was so hard that it was almost painful and he felt short-breathed.

He looked at his ceiling again and he blinked twice when he realized by the hue of it that his phone lit up.

With a groan he extended his arm to the side and grabbed it, narrowing his eyes at the bright screen.

Then he choked and sat up.

“Fuck!” Doyoung exclaimed upon seeing his phone turn dark in his hands.

With a quick roll of the body, he put his palms on the ground looking for his charger. It took him some other swears and grunts to finally charge it but the phone remained black.

“What the fuck,” he sighed, hitting his head into the pillow.

_____

It was in the way you walked, the way your feet touched the floor.

Or maybe it was the way the air floated between your fingers when you moved your wrists as if grabbing something in Doyoung’s chest and pulling him towards you.

The line of your back extended up until your neck, the line of your jaw, your cheeks puffing up when you laughed and your eyes closing for a second. The sound of it making his heart beat faster and a little smile creeping on his lips although he was in a very bad mood that day.

The people you were talking to stopped looking at you and stared somewhere behind your back instead.

Mouth still open while explaining to them that blue and red looked disgusting together, you turned around to see what caught their attention and you met Doyoung’s face.

Your breath hitched and you had to swallow a few times before being able to speak.

“Hey,” you straightened your back as he approached you.

“It’s time for a lunch break,” he announced without batting an eye.

You blinked a few times, trying to process his presence there all of a sudden.

“You’re dismissed,” he spoke to the creative team and they obeyed him, walking away slowly and chuckling between themselves.

You waited for them to not eavesdrop and huffed before whispering. “Who do you think you are?”

“Your soulmate.”

He slipped his hand in yours and started to walk towards the exit. You let yourself be dragged amused for the first steps then stopped.

“My bag.”

Doyoung rolled his eyes and raised his other hand that was already holding it.

“Come on. I’m starving.”

“Where are we going?” you asked the back of his head as you were already descending the stairs. “Why are you here?”

“I’m annoyed,” he replied as if that was a sufficient explanation and opened the passenger seat’s door for you. "So I wanted to see you because it puts me in a good mood."

You looked at him for a few moments then sighed, trying to conceal your flustered emotions.

“Why are you annoyed? Because you realized that leaving me on read last night was stupid?” you put on your seatbelt.

When you raised your head Doyoung’s palms were on both sides of your face and his lips on yours. You exhaled softly, not expecting any of it so suddenly, then timidly you rested your hand on his knee. The luscious material of his suit was delicate under your fingertips so you absentmindedly started to draw little circles on it, imitating the pattern Doyoung’s tongue was making yours dance in. When he pulled away slightly you managed to look at his eyes. He placed another peck on your lips, then another. By the time he placed the third one you were giggling. The corners of his mouth raised too and you cupped his face and he flinched imperceptibly.

“I thought you wanted to slap me.”

“There are many reasons why I would want to slap you but not today.”

“Not today.”

“Be ready anytime.”

“You too,” he kissed your knuckles before putting his hands on the wheel. “But like on the butt.”

The engire roared as Doyoung turned the keys.

“My phone died,” he explained.

“Yeah, okay.”

“I swear.”

The engine roared again and you drove away from the winery's parking lot.

You sighed, crossing your arms on your chest.

“It’s okay. Only because you’re sweet.”

"Am I sweet?"

"You are."

"You're sweet too so I can't wait to eat you out again."

You rolled your eyes playfully. "Okay, you went there."

But he didn't do anything you'd expect him to do. Entering his apartment calmly, you both let the shoes at the entrance and you sighed to feel his soft living room rug under your bare feet.

No bending, no pushing and no hands to knead your flesh.

You tilted your head to the side amused as he placed your bag on the couch and ventured towards the kitchen.

"Is Jaemin home?" you inquired. Maybe that was the reason he didn't want to rearrange your guts that day.

Doyoung took away his jacket and slowly rolled up his sleeves. Your eyes followed his movements and although you weren't horny one bit before you saw him, now you would have been able to go on for multiple rounds with no rest in between upon seeing just his forearms. You took away your jacket too and expected him to do something already but he turned around and entered the kitchen instead.

"I'm making spaghetti."

You blinked at his profile as he retrieved a pan and a pot, filling the latter with water.

"Did you really bring me here for lunch?" you couldn't help but ask as you sat down at the table.

"Yeah. Why? Is that strange?"

You shrugged. "I don't know. You've always sought me for other things."

He faked an offended expression. "I fed you dinner last time."

You smiled. "But you also fucked me."

"You want me to fuck you after spaghetti?"

"Not necessarily. I like just hanging out with you, but only you like it as well."

As if sensing something in your tone, his amusement wore off when he finally started to cut the onions.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I like it?"

"I mean, we've never really openly discussed this," you gestured between you. "Hell, I fucked you three times before knowing your name."

"You've never asked for it."

"Yeah, well, my mouth was busy doing something else."

He smiled a little and let the onions fall into the hot pan, stirring a few times and opening the fridge to retrieve the tomato sauce.

"How do you want to discuss it?"

His voice got quieter and you had the hunch that he really didn't like having serious talks or emotional ones. Just like, well, just like your supposed soulmate. The thought made your stomach knot up.

"I know this might sound a little funny, but like, what are we?"

Doyoung added the tomato sauce and sprinkled salt, pepper and hot pepper flakes on it before stirring. His domestic look made your chest hurt in ways you've never experienced with him before and suddenly you were afraid to know what he had to say.

"I don't know, but we can be something starting now."

You sighed a little. "Like, friends with benefits?"

Doyoung's expression didn't change but his throat moved as he swallowed. The water started to boil and he put the spaghetti in, pushing them inside as they softened.

"You want us to be friends with benefits?"

No.

Yes.

But like no.

You wanted the friends, you wanted the benefits, but you wanted more.

Would you scare him away if you said that? Would he retreat just like he did when you mentioned the soulmates discourse?

"What about you?"

Dancing around each other like two assassins about to throw the first dagger you let the silence be the witness of it.

"I like you," he hit you first but it was no knife. It was light just like a kiss and your eyelids fluttered.

"Really?"

He let out a single soft chuckle. "Yeah. Why are you so surprised?"

You gulped and looked around not knowing what to say.

"It's just-- your whole soulmate discourse made it look like you wouldn't be romantically interested in me at all."

Doyoung didn’t speak for a moment as if trying to remember, then nodded.

"I don't believe in soulmates."

He placed the lid on the sauce and let it slowly cook.

"I believe in choices. And I'm choosing you I guess."

"Don't you think that maybe you're conditioned to choose me because I'm your soulmate?" you tried to joke but Doyoung didn't smile.

"And where would the fun be in that? My freedom? I think the universe might give you a path but you're free to follow it or not."

"Of course. But isn't it comforting to know that the universe is taking care of you that way?"

"Maybe. Perhaps we're actually soulmates and we've met like ones but now it's our duty to do something about it. I can decide not to see you anymore. What's the universe going to do about it?"

"Make me get into your way and annoy you?" you smiled and his lips curved too.

"What I'm trying to say is that I think we're making our soulmates. I decide that you're my soulmate and we mould ourselves to fit each other. No one is a perfect fit."

You didn't know what to say.

"I tried all of this time you know? I actively sought you out and maybe to you it was fate but we wouldn't be here if I didn't come to you. But you've just been waiting."

His words stung your heart and it felt like a scold.

"I just--it's not like I don't care. I also like you. A lot. I was just--hoping for it to be soulmate like, you know? Maybe that was childish of me."

"What did the Lady tell you? As your last words?"

"To have faith."

"Me too. But to me, faith is putting in the effort and believing in good results. Not waiting for stuff to happen."

"I guess you're right."

"Would you have let me go if you didn't think I was the soulmate you were looking for?"

You blinked a few times unable to speak.

Yeah.

You would have and the sudden realization felt so scary that your spine started to shiver.

He has been speaking without looking at you and at your silence, he turned his head towards you. When he noticed your glossy eyes he let the pan go and walked towards you.

"Why? No. Why are you crying?" he kneeled in front of you, talking with a soft voice and he placed his hands on your shoulders.

You shook your head shocked to see a few drops on your thighs and quickly patted your cheeks dry. Then you let out a timid laugh.

"I don't know what happened. I got emotional all of a sudden. It's fine."

Doyoung sighed and nibbled at his lower lip.

"What I'm trying to say is, even if someone came to me now and told me that you're not my soulmate and they are instead, I would not care. I'm still choosing whoever I want and that's you."

You felt your chin shake by itself and hated the fact that you wore your emotions on your sleeve like that.

"I'm sorry."

"Why?"

You shrugged. "I don't know. I feel like I fucked up something."

Doyoung waited, his fingers gently running your arms.

"I would have probably made the mistake of letting you go-," you sobbed, "and at first since things have been so weird and not necessarily easy I didn’t try enough-,"

His eyes softened and he pulled you into a hug.

"You're here now. Why are you worrying about things that could have happened?"

You wrapped his neck and hid your face into his shirt. His familiar scent culled you and you bathed in his warmth.

"I feel like I'm very childish right now and the lady told me that my soulmate liked me for being a boss woman-,"

"I like all of our sides, you fool," he pulled you away and kissed your forehead.

"But you’d like me more if I tied you up." "You’d also like me more if I tied you up." "I actually like it when you're subby." "See? And the lady told me that you liked me being dominant." "I do love it when you're dominant," you timidly circled his chest with your finger. "Hm, maybe I should-,"

"The pasta!" you yelled pointing your finger and Doyoung jolted turning around towards the stove.

The pasta was completely fine and he sighed closing his eyes.

"I thought it was on fire," he complained with a whiny tone as he turned the stove off. Quickly he drained the spaghetti and threw it in the tomato sauce stirring it afterwards. With the corner of his eye, he saw you stand.

"Come here."

You giggled and took a few quick steps back.

His eyes were furious and paired with his smiling expression he looked like a tornado.

"Come here," he repeated.

You shook your head.

"I said-," he managed to grab you and throw you on his shoulder, "-come here."

"Fuck!" you squealed. "Yeah, fuck, that's exactly what I'm going to do to you now."

One second you were standing and the other you were lying down on the couch with the most aggressive Doyoung you’ve ever seen attached to your neck.

The whines came quickly as he sucked your skin inside the mouth, not worrying for a second if it might become sore. As you grabbed his belt his iron fingers clasped your wrists together and you found yourself pinned with your arms above your head. Your chest rose and fell fast looking at his dark eyes under the unstyled fringe.

“Be a good girl and perhaps I’ll think about making you cum,” he whispered through his teeth. You squirmed under him and found yourself breathless.

“Did you hear me?” his other hand fell back the exact moment he bit down on your clothed nipple.

“Are you not wearing a bra?”

You giggled. “I manifested you coming to see me today. And you did.”

His eyes were dark as they analyzed you and for an instance, you thought he’d burst into tears.

But then he reached the hem of your blouse and lifted it up in a second, biting your nipple, letting his tongue circle it afterwards, soothing the sudden sweet pain then biting on it again, stretching it out, sucking on it, giving the same treatment to the other one. His fingers intertwined yours when he felt your wrists try to lift up from the couch and he pushed them down even harder than before.

“Do I have to tie you all up? Huh? I bet you’d like it, right?”

His breath was hot on your lips and so was his tongue when he took it out and slowly outlined them with his wet tip. You opened your mouth and took out your tongue too with a little moan, trying to catch him into a kiss, but he chuckled lightly and let you feel the air instead. Another whine as you lifted your head to reach him but he was quick to push you down by pressing his fingers on your throat. You choked lightly and he pouted.

“Bad baby girls don’t get to kiss,” he murmured. "But if you really want it-" he pressed one finger on your lower lip and opened your mouth. Y

our thighs tightened their hold around his waist and you pulled him towards you even more. The trail of saliva falling on your tongue from his mouth added somehow to the wetness between your legs.

You wanted to be a good girl. You wanted to be a good girl so badly, pleasing him and letting him whatever he wanted to you.

Swallowing slowly, you opened your mouth for more and he finally shoved his tongue inside, kissing you deeply, grunting as he let your hands go and you were quick to let them slide under his shirt.

His skin was hot and your fingers icy cold. He hissed when you circled his nipples and bit your lip.

"Maybe you should warm your hands by doing something useful." He took his cock out and-

"Okay, that's enough!" Jeno threw a cloth on the crystal ball.

"Ah! Come on! I was having so much fun," the Lady complained, jingling her earrings as she giggled.

The boy sitting across the table made a throwing up sound. "Also, why are you still looking like that? It's creeping me out," he commented.

The Lady looked at the mirror on her right and chuckled again.

"I like it when Haechannie is like this," Jaemin appeared from behind him and playfully kissed his cheek.

Jeno made another gag sound. "Gross."

Haechan shook his head and as the boys blinked he was back to his boyish looks. "I'll never get used to this," Jaemin murmured as he was not holding long hair anymore.

"Good job guys. We did it again," Haechan stood up and yawned, lifting his arms in a satisfying stretch. "If Jaemin didn't get back home that time she was over then it might have been quicker," Jeno lifted his legs on the table and leaned down on the chair.

“This is my first job! It was very tough for me actually,” Jaemin complained.

“Hard for you? I had to be myself, the winery girl, the secretary-,” he counted on his fingers.

“I had to be the cashier and I almost lost it when Jaemin said he couldn’t wait to taste your wet pussy-,” Haechan threw his head back and laughed. Jaemin imitated him soon after.

“Did you see Doyoung’s face? He wasn’t into it at all.”

"I miss being a Gryffindor. This universe is boring as fuck,” Jeno rolled his eyes even if he was also smiling a little.

"The next one might be as boring as this my dear friends," Haechan sat back down and brought out his book.

Jeno groaned. "Can't we have a normal life for once? I had to pretend I was a girl. And not only. The thought of Y/N thinking I was doing BDSM stuff with that guy-," he indicated a very amused Jaemin, "-took a toll on my health."

"I'm sorry I'm not a shapeshifter too. I would have loved to be the girl in this relationship. Also, it was you that told her we were doing BDSM stuff, not me.”

“It’s because I forgot to fully shift my arms! She thought I was-,”

"Quiet."

As Haechan spoke the guys immediately stopped talking and Jeno put his feet down.

"The next one is going to be a hard one. We're going to a dark place."

He closed the book.

"To hell, boys."

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