#no proofreading we die like men | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

notsofunsenpai · 2 months

Text

The two played a tea party for about thirty to forty-five minutes,Charlie let's out a small yawn,rubbing her eyes with her little hands.

Alastor smiles at her,"Awww,is someone sleepy?"

Charlie nods her head,slowly at her dad,"eepy..".

Alastor chuckles,"Alright,come here." He said, picking her up,taking her to the couch,putting a soft ducky blanket onto her as he lays her down. He kisses her head,"Enjoy your rest, darling."he says softly, watching his daughter close her eyes slowly before falling asleep. Before leaving to check up on Luficer,Alastor puts a large pillow next to Charlie so she doesn't accidentally fall off and hurt herself. He finds his lover in the laundry room,putting tons of towels along with his pajamas into the washer,even adding some laundry soap to it.

"I see you had quite the morning with your daughter. " Alastor chuckles,watching Lucifer groan as he presses a button to start the washer.

"Let's just say i had a lot to clean up along with getting toliet water on my jammies. It wasn't an idea, but it makes moments like this memorable. "Lucifer said,smiling.

"Well, maybe it would go smoothly if someone didn't accidentally mistake baby shampoo for adult shampoo like last time . It is literally a different color. The baby shampoo is purple with a tear drop on it, and it says baby on it -" Alastor teased lightly.

"It was one time! I said I'd be more careful from now on!" Lucifer pouts.

"Just glad you didn't get your eyes scratched out." Alastor chuckles,resting a hand on his lover's grabbable waist.

"Heh,i was lucky this time." Lucifer says softly,leaning in to kissing his lover who, in return, kisses back.

The kiss was gentle,and so was Alastor,he would never hurt his other half. No matter how evil people make him out to be,Lucifer was the first one to ever trust him and show him feelings besides fear.

The kiss had him feeling excited?

No,that wasn't the right word.

Giddy?

Maybe,whatever that word was he needed -

No, he wanted more of his lover's affection as he deepened the kiss,bringing his lover closer to him.

Lucifer felt himself become warm all over,his ears were warm along with his cheeks as he was getting devoured by his lover. His pale hands go to Alastor's hair,getting tangled as the kiss gets more heated.

Alastor is grinning,kiss by kiss as his hands are now going up into Lucifer's black shirt he was wearing,hearing him whimper.

"Again. I need to hear that again, Applepie." Alastor demand,feeling like he's going crazy.

"Please.." he weakly added before his ears perk up,hearing some rustling followed by a whine.

"Charlie's awake dear.." Alastor said,mumbling into Lucifer's neck.

Lucifer laughs,"I'll take care of her. Go take a few minutes to cool down Bambi."

"Thank you, dear." The taller male kisses his lover once more

one more time

Okay, one more time

"Baby."

"Right, sorry." Alastor quickly said,wagging his little tail.

"So cute." Lucifer said before kissing his cheek,then goes to his awake daughter.

Lucifer gives his daughter a smile,"Good morning, my little Princess!" He said, picking her up,fixing some of her hair.

"Mamaaa!" She giggles,giving her mama a hug.

Lucifer nearly melts," You're too cute." He hugs her back lovingly,"Do you still wanna play tea party, or do you wanna play something else?" He asked.

"Colwrr!!"

"Coloring! Okay,let me get your crayons and coloring books." Lucifer said, setting his daughter down,getting some of her drawing stuff, then setting them down on the brown table.

Charlie grabs one of the crayons and one of the books. At first, she goes inside the lines, but then she starts squibbling over the page.

Lucifer sat down next to her, also coloring,making sure he didn't mess up on his coloring. He was so focused that he didn't realize Charlie was now drawing on the table. She drew shapes and letters and even wrote her name.

She stands on her stubby little feet,going to walls, thinking it's a canvas she can use,and starts drawing.

Alastor walks in,feeling calmer until he sees the drawings all over the place,and his oh so beautiful lover also not watching their daughter.

Charlie sees her dad and runs to him,hugging his leg,"Daa,look!!" She excited said, pointing to her drawings on the wall.

Alastor's eye twitch,smiling as he picks her up,"They are so beautiful, darling." He said, holding her.

"Lucifer Morningstar. Honey."

The sound of his full name being called made the blonde flinch as he realized he got distracted,slowly looking at the drawings on the wall. Realizing he fucked up big time,then he looks at his partner who was smiling but also looked like he wanted to murder him. He gulps,"Doesn't our wall look more lovely? We needed to get rid of some of that boring blanknest anyhow! Haha.." he nervously says.

"Clean. It. Up.Now." was all Alastor said,"Come on dear,let's get you change into something different. " he says to Charlie,who nods her head happily.

Lucifer wasted no time in cleaning the walls and table.

Alastor takes Charlie to her room,he picks out a yellow shirt with a duck in a rainhat on,drinking juice with matching duck shorts for her to wear, which she absolutely loved. He also brushed her hair,it was slighlty messy from when she was napping. He humms as he brushes out some knots as she sits on his lap.

"Dada angy at mwama?" Charlie suddenly asked,looking up at her father,who tilts her head down for a bettle angel for brushing.

"No,of course not."

"Give mwama a scary look."

Alastor chuckles softly,"i promise I'm not mad if i was darling ,I'd be yelling at him along with putting him on the couch." He said, trying to put it as nicely as he could. If he was being honest, he would have given him the silent treatment and made him sleep on the couch,he could never yell at him.

He finishe brushing her hair,putting it in a braid,adding little yellow flowers," help make dinner?" he asked her.

"Ye!"

He smiles at her as she practically jumps up,running out the door as he follows quick behind her so she doesn't accidentally hurt herself.

Alastor put a little pink apron on his daughter along with a small chefs hat,"What should we have for dinner?" He asked,helping her wash her hands and dry.

"Megaa Sandshichh!!"

Alastor regretted this already, but it'd be payback at his lover,"Alright sweety. any anything for dessert...?"

"Babque cookiess!"

The demon father smiles,"lovely." He grabbed out all the ingredients they needed. He toasted the slices of bread for Charlie,letting them cool for a min or two before giving it to her. He also helped spread brown chocolate sauce on the bread with a knife as she placed a pickle on it along with adding a candy bar to it with ketchup,topping it with bread. The smell was awful for Alastor,he knows he'll order take out later after he puts her to bed.

For the dessert, it was obvious..he just got a small cup of bbq sauce and a packet of cookies.

He heats up the sandwiches his daughter made for all three of them,he plated them,setting it on the tabel,"Get your ma while i clean up some."

Charlie goes to her mother,he was just finished cleaning up,"food time!" She says to him.

His eyes lit up,picking her up as she giggles,"cant wait to eat!" He says going into the kitchen with her.

His face turns sour at the creation that was made.

"Your daughter made it my little apple. So eat up." Alastor smiles.

Lucifer takes a deep breath,setting Charlie in her high chair along with taking a seat himself.

Alastor took his sandwich whole,eating it without a problem,"Delicious. " he said, licking some of the melted food from his fingers.

Lucifer nearly gags,he can't believe he kisses that man with his mouth. He glances at his daughter, who is chowing down on her food happily.

"Your food is getting cold, darling." Alastor said with a smile.

The blonde takes ahold of the food,sniffing it..man pickles and chocolate don't go together...he thinks to himself before taking a bite,tasting ketchup.

His face turned green real quick,he stands up and ran to the bathroom quickly,trying not to hurl everywhere.

"Dada no like?" Charlie tilts her head,mouth and hands covered in chocolate.

"Worry not about him,he has a weak stomach. " Alastor tells her,picking up the uneaten sandwich and finishes it himself.

"Ready for dessert?"

"YEEES!"

Alastor places the bbq sauce and cookies in front of her while he takes her plate,and the other two to clean.

Charlie dips the cookie in the bbq sauce then eats it,like it was the best thing in the whole world and repeats the steps untill there was no more.

Alastor takes the cup and the wrapper of cookies and recycles them. He also grabbed a wash clother that he wet,wiping Charlie's face and hands,"Such a messy girl." He says before letting Charlie out of the high chair.

"Go play,don't make any messes, alright, darling?" He said nicely.

Charlie nods her head before running off to her toybox to play with her stuffed animals,in the meantime Alastor quickly put the clothes in the dry then went to check up on his lover.

"You done dying in there?" He asked Lucifer, who was puking his guts up. He goes into the bathroom,patting his lover's back. He did feel alittle bad for him,"I'm sorry, my little apple. I didn't think it'd upset your wittle stomach."

The blonde keeps regurgitating for a few more seconds,breathing heavily while wiping his mouth as tears were in his eyes . "It's fine." He sniffs.

Alastor hugs him gently,giving him kisses along with kissing his tears away,"I'm sorry." He repeats.

Lucifer laughs lightly,"Okay,Okay,i feel better, stoop!" He smiles a little.

"I'll order something light for you who later,something easy for your stomach. How's that sound?" Alastor suggested.

"I'd love that." The other replied.

"Imma check up on Charlie,ill order it when you come out love."

"Thank you."

Alastor goes back to his daughter and plays dolls with her for a few minutes.

Lucifer comes out,feeling a little better,sitting next to Alastor.

The three started to play dolls for abit untill it was time for Charlie's bedtime.

This time Alastor was the one who helped her get ready for bed while Lucifer clean up the toys along with waiting for the food they had ordered to arrive.

Alastor had no trouble with Charlie,getting her bathed and brushing her teeth. He tucks her in her duck shaped bed that had cute little duckies on the blankets and pillows,even the bed board was duck shaped. Alastor sits on the bed,reading one of her favorite books, which happens to be The Ugly Duckling.

He was almost done with the book when he noticed his daughter had fallen asleep. He smiles sweetly at her,giving her head a kiss as he pulls the blanket up on her some so she doesn't get cold. "Love you, my little devil child. "

He gets up,putting the book back on the bookshelves, then leaves,making sure the door is open just alittle.

The red-haired male sits next to the blonde who was eating his steak,he undo his ponytail,leaning back against the couch,feeling tired himself from the eventful day.

"Want a bite?" Lucifer asked,mouth full of different things he had ordered.

"I'm good love. Though i didn't expect you to get alot."

"I may be small but i have a big appetite even after our precious daughter's cooking. "

Alastor chuckles,running his fingers through his hair,"Fair point. I should let her make our dinner more often."

He nearly choked, "I didn't say that now!"

"Im just kidding,we'll have her cook sometimes. Ill even buy her a mini oven!" Alastor smiles,glancing at his lover.

"If you do that I'll sleep on the couch !"

"Ha! Is that a threat, love?"

Lucifer pouts,"Hey!"

"Im joking, hun." Alastor smiles,leaning against Lucifer,giving him kisses in which he returns.

"Love you, Bambi."

"Love you too, my Applepie.

#hello tumblr #no proofreading we die like men #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel #appleradio #RadioApple #fanfic #little charlie #charlie morningstar #lucifer morningstar #soft alastor #soft Lucifer #fluff #wholesome

89 notes · View notes

dreaamerwrites · 1 year

Text

[ JEALOUS ]

rating: PG couple: cho guesung x female reader request: "can i ask you to imagine cho gue sung if he gets jealous because of one of the other players?" tags: jealousy, cake, kangin shenanigans, making out in a hotel hallway lol note: reader has had a crush on guesung for a long time. she was starting to wonder if her feelings might be reciprocated while they were apart during the Qatar World Cup, but during a welcome back party for our KNT boys, guesung begins to act very, very strange. /

You realize something is wrong immediately.

You can’t quite put your finger on how you know. He’s standing on the other side of the room, several feet of carpet, appetizers, and rowdy footballers stretching out in the space between you two. Seungho is laughing at his side. Jinsu must’ve cracked a joke, because Guesung appears to be laughing too now. But…

But you can tell something is wrong.

Maybe it’s that tight set to his jaw. (You can see it clench and unclench, an unhappy habit you know he’s been trying to break for months now, per his dentist’s orders.) Or maybe it’s his arms, crossed over his chest. He’s standing broad; feet apart, shoulders squared. He looks half-ready to fight or bolt – and yet, still, he continues to laugh between Jinsu and Seungho. As if everything is fine, as if nothing’s wrong.

His eyes briefly flicker over. They meet yours. You frown at him, trying to ask and convey:

What’s wrong?

Guesung’s expression does not change as he looks away yet again.

“Noona, did you taste this yet?!”

Suddenly a fork comes in line with your vision.

You look to your left, startled. Kangin had been chatting animatedly by your side for the last few minutes but, with Guesung looking so off, you hadn’t been able to pay much attention to the boy. The Mallorca boy smiles down at you with a broad, earnest smile, all teeth and dimples, and you immediately soften.

“No, not yet,” you reply, leaning forward to take the bite of cake he offers to you. It tastes of blueberries and whipped cream. “Are you guys even allowed to eat stuff like this?”

“Of course,” Kangin’s grin grows even wider, a truly impossible feat. “It’s Day 1 of our vacation. I deserve this today. Isn’t it good?!”

The sweetness clings to you, both from the cake and the boy.

“Yes,” you laugh, shaking your head. “It’s very good.”

Pleased, Kangin moves to take another bite for himself now. He’s settled close to you, as he had been for the last hour…

(I’ve missed you, noona! he had exclaimed, as soon as he had found you waiting in the hotel suite, still adding the last finishing touches to the makeshift welcome party you and the rest of the Seoul-based staff had thrown together.

The day had been a hectic one – their flights delayed, the airport erupting into chaos, countless fans lining up outside the hotel where the team had intended to touch base before all going their separate ways. You had been a mess then, hair still up in a sloppy bun, a pile of knotted streamers in your hands. Kangin had nearly tackled you down with a hug regardless.

You should’ve come with us, he had whined, arms still tight around your waist. Qatar wasn’t the same without you!

Over his shoulder, at that moment, you had seen Guesung walk in, face gaunt, eyes tired. He had stopped briefly when he saw the spectacle before him – Kangin hugging you in a wild bear hug, walking you backwards and nearly knocking over a bowl of confetti in the process – before shaking his head and making his way immediately towards the bar cart.)

That had been one hour ago.

And now, Kangin is still pressed into your side, curled up beside you on one of the hotel suite loveseats – and Guesung…

Well, Guesung has still not even come to say hello.

You’re trying very hard not to take it personally. It isn't as if you have any claim on Guesung. He isn't even your boyfriend, after all. You're close of course. You're close with all of them really. But… but Guesung had been different. Had felt different.

Especially over the last few weeks, throughout the World Cup campaign. You two had been talking more than ever. Constant phone calls, constant texts. You had spoken to him more over the last few weeks while he was in Qatar than you had ever before.

(And when he’d fall asleep, mid-sentence, mumbling to you over the phone about just wanting to do well, to make everyone happy, to make you feel proud of him… well, was it wrong for your heart to have flipped at the promise? Was it wrong to start to wonder if, for the first time in years, that perhaps your feelings weren’t so one-sided after all?)

You did well, Guesung. I missed you. I’m proud of you, Guesung. I missed you.

You had had so many things to tell him in-person and yet, now, you can’t even find the courage to approach him from across this very hotel room.

Was it possible for someone to feel far away, even while in the same room? How had he managed to feel even closer, when he had been oceans away before?

“You wanna know a secret, noona?” Kangin suddenly asks.

He’s pressed to your side, radiating a comforting kind of heat that briefly distracts you from how strange Guesung has been all evening.

You force yourself into a brief, small smile before turning to look at Kangin again. He has a small smudge of whipped cream on his Cupid’s bow. He looks as soft, kind, and sweet as ever. A boy, enjoying his cake, just happy to be here at all.

“Sure,” you can’t help but laugh, reaching over to wipe the cream from his lips with your thumb, endeared. He blushes sheepishly at the action, licking at his lips afterwards. This time, you press your shoulder into his instead, laughing teasingly. “What’s the secret, kid?”

This gets him back on track.

Momentarily forgetting his sheepishness, Kangin straightens up, sitting broad in the loveseat with you, shoulder firm against yours. He gives you an owlish, knowing look.

“I’ve been conducting an experiment,” he says, very matter-of-factly.

You raise a brow, licking the icing off your thumb. Kangin doesn’t bat an eye.

“You see, when we were at the airport, some of the hyungs were all making fun of… someone,” he raises a brow right back at you, all swagger now, as if he wasn’t just caught with frosting on his lip. “They all knew you’d be here, waiting for us when we got back, ya’know.”

You’re not quite sure where this is going.

“They were making fun of him, saying that… that someone would probably be soOOOooOo happy to see you,” Kangin hums, clearly pleased with himself. “He tried to deny it the whole trip. Said it wasn’t a big deal. Said he just wanted to see you just like everyone else. Said it wasn’t like that.”

Wasn’t like that. Suddenly your heart is caught in your throat.

“Kangin,” your smile falters.

Kangin’s expression transforms from faux swagger to warm encouragement in a split second. He sets his cake down onto the coffee table and, hands free now, shifts even closer to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder.

“I needed to call bullshit,” he smiles warmly, no malice lacing his words whatsoever. Just pure kindness and laughter. He radiates so much softness that you can’t even admonish him for swearing. “I wanted to make them acknowledge that: nope, this is exactly like that.”

Kangin squeezes your shoulder firmly, never breaking eye contact with you.

“Noona, you deserve someone who will be honest about their feelings. You deserve someone who will be proud to have you in their life and who will fight to keep you always.”

(Just want you to be proud of me, Guesung had murmured sleepily on the fourth night.

His voice had sounded far away on the phone. You had pressed the receiver closer to your ear. You could catch what he said next just barely. It came so soft and sleep found him so quickly after that you wondered if you had dreamt it all.

Just want you to want me too, he had whispered. Just want you.)

“So I started wondering, ya’know. If this guy can’t even be brave enough to tell his friends that he likes you, then will he ever be brave enough to deserve you?” Kangin continues, this time more flippantly than before. His gaze flickers over to the side of your head but he holds you still, does not let you look away. “So I needed to run a little experiment.”

Suddenly Guesung is standing before you.

This time, Kangin lets you look up, look away. Lets you look up into Guesung’s face, to find his expression pinched and unhappy, his big hand brushing Kangin’s off of your shoulder with focused intent.

Guesung grabs your arm and lifts you up and off the couch.

“We’re going,” Guesung grits out. “Now.”

“Guess I know my answer now,” Kangin laughs loudly, a full-bodied laugh. You can see he has some whipped cream still left on his chin, too, that you hadn’t noticed before.

You glance between the young boy and Guesung in confusion – but Guesung doesn’t give you a chance to squeak out another question.

He leaves behind a laughing Kangin and pulls you further and further away, his hand firm on your arm, fingers pressing into your skin as he pulls you through the crowd of people, his steps so wide that you nearly trip over your own feet to keep up with him.

Heungmin is laughing now, just as loudly, and you can see Jinsu and Seungho doubled over in the corner.

Guesung does not spare anyone a second glance.

He does not even spare you a glance until you’re out, finally, standing in the hotel hallway, the suite room slamming closed behind you. Your back hits the wall.

“I’m – what – what’s going on – ” you sputter, Guesung’s hand still tight around your arm. “Guesung, you’re hurting me.”

He drops his hand immediately, as if burned. Still, he does not look at you. He stares down at his hand instead. His chest is heaving and his expression has morphed from frustrated anger to one of disbelief, as he stares down at his palm. He clenches it closed into a fist, his knuckles white.

Just want you to want me too.

“Sorry, I’m – I’m sorry,” Guesung is muttering now, voice low and gravelly. Thick with something uncomfortable. “I shouldn't have – sorry, I grabbed you. I shouldn’t have – ”

You can hear the party even through the thick hotel room door that separates you from the rowdy footballers. You can almost hear Kangin laughing, still.

Be brave, he’d probably tell you.

Be brave, he’d probably tell the both of you in this hallway.

Slowly, you raise your hand to cover Guesung’s closed fist. His hand is so big, compared to yours, that you can barely cover half of it. You raise your other as well. Cradling his fist in both of your hands, you smooth your thumbs over his clenched knuckles. You can feel him shiver at the touch and finally, finally… you buck up the courage to look up.

To look at him.

Guesung stares down at you, towering over you with his height. He blocks out the hotel light behind him, still breathing heavily, shoulders shaking, and, for once, all you can see is him. The hotel room, the laughter, the party: everything fades away. There is only you, and there is only him.

The silence is deafening.

His mouth is pressed into a thin line. His expression is still unreadable, guarded and unhappy, but the beauty mark just below his eye is so endearing that you can’t help but soften, despite yourself.

For the first time that evening, you think you may finally understand what was wrong all along.

I miss you, his eyes seem to scream. I missed you!

You let go of his hand to reach up to cradle his face carefully instead.

“It’s okay,” you whisper into the silence of the hotel hallway. “Don’t be sorry.”

Be brave!

“I missed you too,” you admit quietly.

The change in his expression comes so swiftly that you can barely register it before he crushes you against him. He presses your face into his broad chest and wraps his muscled arms around you tightly, desperately. He holds you so close that your own chest rises and falls with each breath he takes. His breath is warm and harsh against your ear, a faint whine of unhappiness rising up when you wiggle in his arms, trying to free your own arms so that you can wrap them around him. Only when your arms circle his waist does he finally let out a ragged, relieved sigh.

Still, he does not let you go.

“I hated it. All of it,” he mutters into your hair. “Everything in there. I'm sorry. I hated that Kangin was the first one you saw. I hated that he was with you all night. I hated that we didn’t speak and that you didn’t look at me and that you were looking at him and –”

He’s rambling now, all nonsense and tight breaths.

You smooth your hand down his back. Follow the curve and dip of his spine. Rub soothing circles into the base. He seems to melt into you at the touch, though he’s careful not to rest his weight onto you.

You don’t think you’d mind it, really. You tug him closer, still.

“I didn’t know,” you whisper back quietly. “I’m sorry too.”

This stops the rambling.

Guesung seems to go still in your arms. And then, unwillingly, reluctantly, he slowly pulls back. His hands are locked behind your back so neither of you can go very far, but he pulls back just enough to get a better look at your face. You’re not sure what you look like. Your hair feels like a mess, from being pressed up against him just now, and you’re sure you’re flushed as well – but…

But Guesung looks at you like you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

And, damn, if he isn't the most beautiful thing you've ever seen as well.

His mouth is red and his cheeks are flushed. He stares down at you with such intensity that you want to squirm under his gaze, but still he holds you in place. You swallow. His hair has come loose, the pomade softening, and a few strands fall into his forehead. You want to push them back. You want to hold him closer. You want him to…

“You didn’t know?” Guesung asks softly, breaking your train of thought.

You shake your head slowly. He licks his lips. Watches you watch him too.

“You didn’t know that I’ve missed you like hell for the last few months? You didn’t know that the first person I wanted to see after our Portugal match... was you?”

Guesung’s gaze never leaves yours.

This time, you do shiver.

“You wanted to see me first?” you reply shakily, a slight tremor in your voice.

Guesung sweeps one hand up from your waist to the side of your neck. Normally he runs cold, you know, but today he is warm, skin hot against yours. His thumb smooths over the slope of your jaw, the touch purposeful and tender.

“I always want to see you first,” he replies, just as shakily, his voice giving him away.

You cannot hear Kangin laughing anymore. You do not hear anything but the sound of Guesung’s soft voice and your own heart thumping loudly in your chest. It’s time to be brave now.

“Good,” you reply.

You tilt your face up to Guesung. And then, staring into his eyes, you lift yourself up onto your tippy toes, rest your hands on his shoulders, and lean up and into him.

When your lips find his, the first kiss is unbearably soft.

A barely there brush of your lips at first – but then there's a second, and then a third.

By the fourth, Guesung is hungry as he pushes you back further against the wall, one leg slotting between yours, his big hand cupping your cheek to tilt your mouth up and open for him even more.

“Missed you,” you murmur between kisses, his tongue catching your bottom lip. You shiver when his other hand stops at the small of your back, thumb sweeping across the stretch of skin there that appears as your shift lifts just slightly. “So proud of you. ‘M so proud of you. Wanted to tell you all night.”

He shakes in your arms at this, holding you closer, his thigh warm between your legs.

“Proud of me?” he mumbles back, pressing another kiss at the corner of your mouth, nose brushing against yours. “Missed me?”

You nod, dizzy now, breathless as he kisses you in earnest. Your hand finds its way into his hair and you give the strands a light tug, pulling him back slightly. When he tilts back, you can see him clearly now. Mouth wet, pink with your lip balm, his hair even more mussed than before. He’s heaving now, chest rising and falling with each desperate breath.

You can taste that cake still – blueberries and whipped cream clinging to the backs of your teeth – but you can taste Guesung too, you think. You lick your lips.

He seems to melt at the sight.

He sags against you, pressed firmly against you, wedging you between his thighs and the cool wall behind you.

“Did you really?” he leans closer, pressing his forehead to yours.

For someone who just kissed you as if their life depended on it, a flash of uncertainty shines in his eyes.

Oh, Guesung…

You decide to be brave enough for the both of you.

“I did. I’m so proud of you. And I missed you so much,” you answer steadily. Your hand in his hair is gentle. You brush the strands back slowly, carefully. Breathe in his cologne and let yourself get dizzy with it. “Wanted you. So much.”

Guesung looks dizzy himself.

He nudges his nose against yours. You’re sure the position must be uncomfortable for him, towering so high above you but leaning down so that he can reach you, like this. He does not seem to care. The uncertainty in his eyes seems to be fading now.

“Really? You wanted – want me?” he clears his throat. Presses himself closer to you, all heat between your legs, shuddering when your fingers card through his hair, nails grazing the nape of his neck. He tries to laugh shakily. “Even more than Kangin?”

The joke catches you so off guard that you let out a helpless, breathless laugh.

“Is that really a question?” you ask, looking down at the predicament you two are in briefly before looking back up at Guesung. Do you see this right now? is what you should really be asking. Instead, you decide to humor him. “Of course more than Kangin. More than anyone else. Always. I wouldn’t be out here kissing Kangin like this!”

This seems to appease him.

He crowds against you even closer, nuzzling your nose with his, sneaking a quick kiss to your cheek.

“Good,” he murmurs. “Only kiss me like this. Only want me. I know I only want you.”

You know there will be lengthy conversations after this. You know the two of you will need to discuss your feelings properly – will need to iron this out and speak like adults, rather than kiss-drunk kids who want only to be wrapped up in each other’s arms. You know that that will all come...

But for now, you let yourself have this.

Be brave.

“Only want you,” you promise, voice soft. Reassuring. Guesung is warm and solid in your arms.

He is everything you could ask for at that moment.

He is everything you could ask for always.

“I promise.”

Bonus cut:

Several minutes later, after a few more lengthy, hungry kisses:

Guesung fixes his hair, ruffling the strands between his fingers, as he gazes at you thoughtfully. You raise a brow at him, as you readjust your shirt, trying to tuck it back in from where he had pulled it loose.

“What is it?”

He purses his lips, a curious look in his eyes.

“You tasted like… blueberries. Do you always taste like berries?”

You pause.

And then, schooling your expression into the most neutral one you can manage, you sniff: “Did you get to try the cake we got for you guys? It’s blueberries and cream. …Kangin fed me some. Didn’t you see – ”

(Really, you both had tried to straighten yourselves out in vain. What was even the point of trying to straighten out your shirt again?)

You yelp when Guesung reels you back in, big hands immediately grabbing onto your hips as he pulls you closer, staring at your mouth with intent, chasing you for another kiss.

“I’ll kiss it away. Gonna kiss you til you taste like me instead,” he growls roughly, mouth open and wet against yours.

You can only laugh into the kiss in agreement.

#cho gue sung #cho gue sung imagines #no proofreading we die like men #LOL #soccer fanfic

1K notes · View notes

bonesandpoemsandflowers · 9 months

Text

my bohemian ass woke up at noon on a friday so I'm not firing on all cylinders yet, but there is this important distinction in the novel, The Phantom of the Opera, and the musical The Phantom of the Opera. I understand why a novel length distinction is cut for time and narrative tidiness for a medium that happens on stage, but I think people draw some very unfair, unflattering and incorrect conclusions from the stage that they port into their reading of the novel.

that is: Erik, the phantom of the opera, knows about Christine and Raoul's engagement and he's actually totally cool with Christine's plan. This is not incel behavior. This is not ~toxic masculinity~ or whatever contemporary bullshit you want to spew on the intentionally sympathetic monster in gothic literature. Raoul is supposed to leave on a naval expedition to the north pole. Christine's plan is to be engaged with him until he leaves. "This is a happiness that will hurt no one," she says. I don't have the exact quote for it but later on she relates how Erik knows and approves, at least of this intended to be limited engagement engagement. Why? Because he's the happiest of men with Christine, and he wants Raoul to experience that happiness. He does also expect Raoul to, you know, fucking leave when he's supposed to, but still. Christine and Raoul are romping around the Opera, kissing and crying together, and our ghost dude here is just like: good for them.

What sets him off is not the idea of a romantic rival. He does not, imo, feel "entitled" to Christine's love or whatever batshit nonsense the Erik-as-incel narrative huffs like paint fumes. What sets Erik off is how Christine has lied to him: not about the engagement, but about the degree of visceral disgust she feels for Erik specifically as a result of his deformity. She details, in graphic detail, how she closes her eyes instead of looking upon him, how she tells him that she only averts her eyes because she is in awe of his genius. She tells Raoul how horrible even physical proximity to Erik is, how grotesque his face is, how the horror of an animated corpse proclaiming his love to her is--well, horrible, and horrifying. Erik is on the floor, on his knees, kissing the hem of her dress, and Christine has her eyes closed the whole time.

I also think contemporary audiences can't handle that. They need Christine to be a pure and wholesome Good Girl (regressive bullshit), who is the victim of an evil evil man, and only the victim (also regressive bullshit). But also because she is a female character in the contemporary mind, she is allowed no flaws. She must reject Erik because he is a bad man. It would be ableist otherwise, yes? And the contemporary audience cannot handle lack of physical beauty being the reason. There can be no nuance to Christine's reactions. She is Good. Erik is Bad. That's all there is to it. The audience member is so sure that they themselves are above moral reproach, too. That's what is at stake here, also.

Never mind that Christine herself, repeatedly, notes that Erik is right when he says that if she thought he was handsome, she would stay. Never mind that when Raoul asks her if she would still love him if Erik were handsome, Christine declines to reply.

To be clear: this is not a Christine bashing post. I think her complexity here is fascinating. I hate a flat one note ingénue and that's not what she IS, and it pains me that fic authors write her that way, as if it's superior. No! Here she's human and she's magnificent! She's conflicted! Erik is alluring but also in ways that are no fault of his own, terrifying.

We gloss over the intended body horror of the novel. I know I do. I forget that he smells like rot and death, that he's cold and clammy to the touch, that he moans like a ghoul, that is supposed to have a gaping nose hole and eyes you can only see in the dark.

I don't think Christine is wrong to lie. But it's easy to understand, if you let yourself, how betrayed the monster might feel when he finds out about all this concealed disgust.

So, two points here

The rage upon being unmasked isn't just because he's unmasked and she broke a rule or whatever. It's the death of his whole gambit and his last hope, and Erik is, canonically, very smart. He knows this. He knows his face IS the issue. He knows it is THE issue. He reads Christine correctly in that the Angel of Music bit is ultimately forgivable in her eyes, and she likes that he brought down her favorite horse, she absolutely is there for their shared spiritual musical raptures. I want people to understand this: ERIK IS RIGHT about his own situation, a LOT of the time. He comes to some bad conclusions after, but in terms of understanding what's happening around him, he's accurate.

And so the rage and despair post Apollo's Lyre isn't "oh no, she loves Raoul," or even "how dare she, that SLUT," as some people make it out to be. It's the realization that he's been a monster to her this whole time. All this time he thought that she saw him as a man, and she has not. All the presumably good memories he has of her and her two weeks she lived with him are now revealed as lies. She's been enduring this whole time, not acclimating. She feels horror. She feels, again, disgust. She's shuddered at the touch of his hand in hers and put on a brave face and he's believed her up until this point, and he's having his physical inadequacies and his uncharacteristic naiveté described in excruciating detail to his romantic rival. He probably feels real fuckin stupid, on top of all else. He's been duped. He also feels disgusting and unlovable, because Christine has just repeatedly described him as disgusting and unlovable.

It is, of course, wildly incorrect to then decide to blow up an opera house about it.

But it's not entitled incel behavior and that's such a boring and contemporary narrative to shove a beautiful example of gothic literature into. Intellectually lazy and artistically myopic. I think most of us, if we're honest with ourselves, can think of a time we thought somebody liked us--maybe romantically or sexually but also maybe not, maybe just as a friend, as a bestie--and we turned out to be very wrong, because the person was just being polite or avoiding awkwardness or whatever. That is: they lied, in a very understandable and justifiable and socially expected way. And how did that feel, dear reader? Not great, right?

The point of the phantom of the opera is that it's a bunch of normal human experiences turned up to the max, dialed into a sublime hum that goes so hard it turns inhuman and terrible. It's that what makes a monster, what makes a man line, which is only interesting to walk if it's identifiably very human in parts. So Erik isn't just romantically rejected: he is rejected in just about EVERY way possible, besides his divinity of music. And this is supposed to the story of his entire life, over and over again, just most vividly and poignantly illustrated by his failure with Christine, when he most desperately wants to be just like everybody else.

And I think it's a shame to lose that very basic narrative and thematic point, but also a shame to lose the nuance of: Erik wants to share his happiness with Raoul. He loves Christine so, so much that he seems to find Raoul's lovesick desire very relatable. Of course, who wouldn't allow his fellow man a glimpse of heaven? And I just chose my words carefully there, if not the rest of the post. In his approval of Christine and Raoul's playful engagement, Erik is briefly engaging on a man-to-man level. He feels human about it. And when he feels human and accepted as human, instead of a walking horror show, he's immediately kind of gracious.

It's when he finds out that he's been a monster and not a man this whole time, in the eyes of his beloved and his rival, that he seems to go: I'll show you what a monster is.

#long post #poto #poto meta #gaston leroux #no proofreading we die like men #my personal belief is that you are absolutely allowed to tell a bunch of socially comfortable lies to get the hell out of dodge #when I'm like “so Christine lied” my intended undercurrent is AND GOOD FOR HER. GOOD JOB.#but also #my personal belief is also that he (erik) (the phantom) (whatever) is still very fuckable despite literally everything #text

329 notes · View notes

soberrsoon · 9 months

Note

HEY POOKIE BEAR i love ur writing sm ur acc one of my fav accounts 😋😋

anyways i was wondering if you wld write smth where the reader is the guitarist of a well known band (like tom knows who she is) and is kinda like a female ver of tom, like she has the same kind of personality and she’s known for being flirty and a bit of a player and tom has like a fat crush on her bc he thinks that’s so hot 😋 and then he meets her at some point and he’s kinda shocked by how confident she is like she’s not stuttering and shi like other girls he talks to 🤭 anyways then she plays hard to get for a while but it ends in them being together??

T. KAULITZ x READER

★ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: you never gave your heart to anyways, not until you met a cocky guitarist

★ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: mentions of alcohol, swearing, cigarettes

★ 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: omgee pookie thx xoxo 😘 anywayssss i had like 1 brain cell writing this and it’s been sitting in my drafts for weeks so yay i’m finally posting this.

you loved the thrill of concerts and being on tour, new man in bed every night, lots of alcohol and dozens of phone numbers being passed around. you could never be contained and you were proud of that fact. being invited to parties was easy since you were in a band, even clubs would let you in with no ID. some would disapprove of your lifestyle but you didn’t care cuz fuck them right? you didn’t care for much, not boys, school, or a anything. you only cared for guitar, it was your passion, your dream. you loved being in a band too but would slack rehearsals sometimes, not without being scolded by lilli though.

“late again,” she said. “hungover, don’t talk,” you said walking past her. you went to a party yesterday and went a little too crazy on the drinks. “there are consequences to your actions ______, stop drinking so much,” said malik, the drummer. “whatever, mom,” you said picking up your guitar. you hated to admit it but you did have a drinking problem, you just couldn’t stop after one you know? you went to go stand by the bassist mery, she was your best friend and the only one that understood you. “anyways, let’s get started,” said lilli. you guys started rehearsal and it went pretty well. you guys all gathered at the end since lilli had some announcements. “we’re finally starting our europe tour!” she enthusiastically announced. “woohoo,” you said sarcastically. she rolled her eyes and turned to the others for questions. “where are we going in europe?” asked mery.

“i only remember the manager saying something about germany,” she said. “when are we starting?” you asked. “next month! we have little time to prepare so i expect you all to show up to rehearsals,” she said looking right at you. “anyways, i hear we’re popular in germany so you guys better put on a show!” said lilli. ignoring her comment, you walked outside and lit a cigarette waiting for the others to finish packing up.

you lit a cigarette outside of the studio as you waited for the others to finish packing up. “ready to go?” asked malik. “yup. wanna go somewhere tonight?” you asked as you caught up with the others. “not sure, the club?” suggested mery as you guys buckled up in the van. “shots on me then,” said lilli. clubbing was your favorite thing to do, second to touring. this was how you met your hookups and one night stands. you loved with the others to minimize housing expenses, it sounded fun at first but now you barely tolerate it.

the fun part of it though is that you can always borrow clothes from lilli or mery. lilli had the cutest, sluttiest clothes ever. you tried on some of her clothes when you got home to plan your outfit. “hey,” lilli said as she walked in. “what’s up?” you asked. “nothing much, just a little tired,” she said, plopping on the bed. “hope i meet someone tonight,” she said. “me too,” you added. you liked the thought of boys but not the thought of dating them, you could never settle into a relationship so one night stands were your best friend.

you decided on a tank top with a mini skirt and you went to go get changed. soon enough it you all finished getting ready and left for the club. you went on like you usually would at a club; party hard, fuck boys, and drink lots. after the night of fun you sat down on the couch and looked up at the tv. it showed an interview of another band that you’ve never heard of. they looked like a bunch of loser teens in your mind but one caught your eye, the one with black hair. he wasn’t exactly your type but you loved his style.

you eventually forgot about that night one might later and you guys were on your way to germany to start the tour. you were excited to meet the fans and the boys. your first stop was the hotel to drop stuff off and get settled in before leaving to tour the venue and get used to the surroundings. you fell on the hotel bed and let out a sigh of relief. “i needed this,” you said to mery whom you shared a room with. “i heard there’s a hot all boy band that going to be at the venue,” she said. “said who?” you asked sitting up, amused by the keyword “hot.”

“i watch the news,” mery replied. “lame,” you said sitting back down. “apparently they’re very hot here, i hope we see them,” she said. “if they’re got then i hope we see them too,” you said yawning before lilli walked into the room. “we have to go soon,” she said. “shit i like garbage right now,” you said before getting up to get changed into something a little more appealing. you slipped into jeans and put on a sequined tanktop before grabbing your heels. “ready,” you said. you guys all got on the bus to the venue and you were anticipating meeting this band mery spoke of. when you got there, many other artists were there already, all waiting for a tour.

mery tapped your shoulder and pointed to a group of boys that looked oddly familiar. “that’s the hot band!” she exclaimed. you turned around and you immediately recognized them, it was the band from that tv interview at the club. “hey i know them, i saw them on tv,” you said to mery. “aren’t they so handsome?” she asked. “a little i guess, they look a bit young though,” you mentioned. “actually we’re about the same age as them,” mery said. “nerd,” you said before petting her head, messing up her hair.

you walked off to go stand in line for the tour with the other artists but you didn’t notice a certain someone noticing you. the line took hours since so many other artists were there but eventually the tour concluded. you realized your band and the other band that mery was talking about were the only bands there that would be performing. you ran back to the van hoping to get back to the hotel room quickly since you were tired, with the others following behind but someone interrupted you.

he walked up to you and introduced himself. “hey, i’m tom,” he said. you were tired and not in the mood to talk to anyone but you tried to be polite since you didn’t want the tabloids to start drama. “nice to meet you, tom,” you said looking at the boy who was surprisingly attractive. “i’m a big fan of your band,” he said. you could tell he wanted to fuck by his expression, i mean what else could he want? “oh really? i’ve heard about you a little too,” you said. he was practically creaming his pants when you said that, you couldn’t help but laugh a little. “do you want to hang out on the tour bus?” he asked.

“thanks but no thanks, my bands a little busy. see you though i guess,” and with that you left. he looked confused at your rejection, like he couldn’t understand how a girl could reject a boy like him. you walked back to the van and mery was practically dying yo ask you questions. “did he just talk to you??” she asked. “yeah what about it?” you replied. “well i guess nothing but you’re not even gonna ask for his number or something? i thought you liked picking up boys especially since he’s exactly your type,” she said. “i’m just really tired right now,” you said yawning.

“oh,” said mery. the car ride back to the hotel room was silent and you almost fell asleep a little on the car. the next day you got ready to explore the city a little before heading to the venue to get ready to perform. you did sound checks and got changed into your stage outfit before meeting the others back stage. you messed around with your guitar a little before you heard backstage staff talking into their wally talkies. “alright tokio hotel is next, get them ready,” they said. malik signaled you guys to start walking on stage and as you did you saw thousands of fans and the venue was completely filled out.

you were so happy and your adrenaline started pumping as the first song started. you got really into it as you strummed your guitar and sang along, getting wild as you usually do. you walked downstairs into the crowd and did crowd surfs, blowing kisses at the audience and doing the “call me” hand signal as well. by the end of the concert your shirt was off and your hair was an mess with your makeup slightly smudged. you said said goodbye to the crowd, giving one last flirtatious smile before walking backstage.

you saw that tokio hotel was already standing there waiting for their set to start. “you’re welcome for the free concert,” you said winking at them as you guys walked by. “leave them alone,” lilli said, laughing and rolling her eyes. you had a little energy left so you walked into the crowd hoping to get a hookup. you saw a guy around your age and walked up to him. “hey, what’s your name?” you asked. “joel,” he smirked. one thing led to another and you ended up making out with him in his truck, although it was dangerous you still enjoyed it. your cell rang and it was mery calling you back to meet with the others.

you left without saying anything to him but not before grabbing a few drinks. you saw mery and ran up to her, she was in the crowd. you offered her a drink which she happily accepted and by the end of tokio hotels set you were both drunk. you were half awake now and wanted to go back to the room. “lilli can we get back to the hotel? i’m tired,” you whined. “yeah sure let me go get malik he’s by the bathroom we’ll meet you by the van,” she said. you and mery walked back to the van and it started getting quiet the farther you got away from stage. you waited by the van for lilli and malik until a familiar face appeared, it was tokio hotel.

“hey, good job tonight guys,” one of the members said. it was the one with black hair, the one that caught your eye first. “oh thanks you guys did good too,” you said. “you were off with some dude half of it,” mery said laughing. you told her to shush as you laughed, their faces were priceless. tom, the one that tried to flirt with you looked jealous? you brushed it off once you saw lilli and malik. “oh we gotta go now,” you said. “wait, do you guys want to go somewhere?” tom asked. gosh this boy was restless you though. “go where?” asked lilli. “you guys can come to our room,” said the black haired one.

you all looked at each other, “why not?” malik said. “alright then uhm let me call our manager and tell her we’ll be gone then,” said lilli. so you guys all got into tokio hotels van and headed for their room. you got sat next to tom whom was still trying to flirt and you decided to entertain him a little. “your guitar playing is amazing,” he said. “you’re not too bad yourself,” you replied. you guys went back and forth like that before you reached their hotel. you immediately went out on the balcony for a cigarette and tom followed.

“i’m surprised, usually girls stutter or get flustered when talking to me,” he said. you were confused as to why he brought that up but at the same time too drunk to care. “well i guess i’m not one of your fangirls,” you replied. it was silent for a bit before you said something. “you said you’ve seen my band around before right?” you asked. “yeah i really am a fan. i always thought you were hot, i was really excited to meet you,” he said. “well am i what you thought i’d be?” you asked. “not at all,” he replied. “you’re funny,” you said, winking at him. you headed inside first and introduced yourself to the others.

after introductions, you found out that the black haired one was bill, the singer, the drummer was gustav, and bassist was georg. you sat down next to mery and the room was silent until georg said something. “so you and tom huh?” he asked. “what about him?” you replied. “do you two like each other?” he asked. “i don’t ‘like’ boys, i fuck them,” you said. “she’s like the female version of tom,” bill said laughing. “what does that mean?” asked lilli. “tom’s just like her, flirty and sort of a player,” said gustav. “that makes sense, you finally found your match,” said malik.

the others laughed before tom walked in. “what’s so funny?” he asked. “nothing, we were just talking about how you and ______ were so similar,” said bill. he looked at you and smirked before taking a seat next to you. “want to take some shots?” asked bill reaching for a bottle of vodka. “sure but how’d you sneak alcohol in the hotel?” you asked. “don’t worry about it,” he said.

you guys took the shots and soon enough you were all drunk. but since you and mery had already gotten drinks the two of you blacked out. you don’t remember much except for someone carrying you to the bed and the lights turning off.

you woke up the next day, not knowing where you were. you saw lilli and malik on the floor and mery sleeping next to gustav. tom was laying next to you with bill next to him while georg slept on the sofa. the bed was crammed so you got off to wake the others up. you walked over to lilli first. “lilli help me wake the others,” you said. “what time is it?” she asked. “it’s like eleven AM,” you said. “oh shit, we were supposed to meet our manager at nine,” she said.

she started panicking which led you to panic so you two were just freaking out which woke the others. “what’s wrong?” asked mery, waking up. “we were supposed to meet our manager at nine, it’s eleven,” she said shaking malik. you were fighting a massive hangover and lillie’s panic wasn’t helping. soon enough tokio hotel woke up and you guys were already at the door. “leaving already?” asked tom. “we’re late to meeting our manager,” you said. “shit,” said georg. “uh see you guys around i guess?” said mery as you guys ran out the door.

lilli had ten miss calls from the manager and dozens of angry texts. you guys got into a lot of trouble, which you took the blame for. you guys went back to the hotel room and you flung yourself on the bed. “ugh fuck this,” you said. “what’s wrong?” asked mery. “this hangover, i feel like i’m dying,” you replied. “i bet calling your boyfriend tom will make you feel better,” she said teasing you. the others started laughing while you just rolled your eyes. “seriously though you guys are perfect for each other,” added lilli. “whatever,” you said.

“speaking of them i happened to get gustavs number last night, maybe we should meet with them tonight~~,” said mery. “well i am bored, maybe the club?” malik suggested. “you read my mind, call him mery,” said lilli. you sat by the side pretending not to be interested because deep down you knew you were starting to find tom attractive and you knew where this would go. he would break your heart or you would breaks his and he would leave, just like the others.

mery called the gustav anyways and it was settled, your band and tom’s band were going out tonight. your manager basically grounded you guys so obviously you couldn’t go out… which wasn’t going to stop you. i mean you guys never listen to your manager hence last night. you felt and looked like garbage so you quickly hoped in the shower before going shopping in town. you went by yourself since the others were too busy doing their own thing, but you didn’t mind since you liked your own company.

hours later you got a call from mery asking you to go back since everyone was getting ready. you meet them back in the room and get ready as well, putting on one the dresses you bought while in town. “did you buy that dress just for tom?” asked lilli in a teasing tone. “no i bought it for you dad,” you replied sticking your tongue at at her. malik and mery laughed as you put your heels on. thirty minutes later you guys all left and met with tokio hotel and there tom was, looking nonchalant but in a hot way as usual. you look away from him to scout out the boys in the club that could help take your mind off things.

you spotted a very cute boy with curly brown hair dancing by himself. you walked up to him, completely separating from the others. “hey i’m ______, what’s your name?” you asked him. “it’s skylar,” he said. “let’s dance,” you said as you started grinding against him. he was into and you even got your mind off tom before you walked over to the bathroom. you guys are out a few moments later, your hair messy and his shirt half buttoned. you blew him a kiss as you walked over to the others who were now sitting on a sofa.

“wow we’ve only just gotten here and you’ve already hooked up with a dude ______ that’s a new record,” said malik. “who keeps track anymore?” you asked him. you took a seat next to mery and tom, right in the middle. tom was visibly staring at you and you were confused until you realized you were wearing a very booby top. “perv,” you whispered over to him. he quickly looked away which made you laugh a little. mery left and decided to go on the dance floor with gustav and bill following while lilli and malik went to the bar to gets drinks leaving you and tom.

“so why don’t you date?” he asked. “same reason as you probably, i don’t believe in love after one night,” you said. “wow, we really are similar,” he said. “you think?” you said. “why don’t we date then?” he asked. “because i’ll break your heart,” you replied. “maybe i’ll break yours,” he said. “nobody breaks my heart,” you replied, chuckling. he gave you a dry laugh and looked away before malik and lilli came back with drinks. you and tom both got super intoxicated that night and one thing left to another and you two ended in a hotel room together. the two of you laid on the bed as you lit a cigarette. “do you hate me?” he asked. “what do you mean?” you were confused. “i mean, you’re not head over heels for me, you don’t stutter or fumble your words at all when we speak and you don’t want to date me, i don’t understand why you would act like that unless you hate me,” he explained. “i don’t hate you, in fact i think i’m in love with you,” you drunkenly admitted.

“you do?” he asked, shocked. “i think. i mean you’re exactly my type and we’re basically the same person so i guess i do,” you said. you were slightly conscious of what you had just confessed to tom and you had no regrets, holding it in was killing you slowly. tom reached for you cigarette and you guys shared it until you put it out. you fell asleep and the next morning you woke up in tom’s arms. he was completely wrapped around you and you had no memory of the night before.

“morning,” he said groggily with his morning voice. “did we…?” you asked, scrounging up as much of last night as you could. “yeah, and you also confessed you love for me,” he said laughing. “oh god, did i?” you asked. “don’t tell me you didn’t mean it,” he said. “unfortunately i did and you’re not going to let me live it down will you?” you asked. “of course not,” he said smiling. you reached over for your phone to missed calls and texts messages from lilli. “i guess we should get back to our hotels,” you said before getting up to put your clothes on. “not before i do this,” tom said, grabbing your wrist and pulling you back to bed before kissing you. “i hate you,” you said digging your face into his chest.

#no proofreading we die like men #2000s #tokio hotel #tokio hotel fanfic #tokio hotel x reader #fan fiction #2000s music #2000s fashion #tom kaulitz #tom kaulitz fanfic #tom kaulitz x reader

226 notes · View notes

yourheartonfire · 9 months

Text

The battle ended not with a bang but a whimper; no glorious triumph or mad retreat but a long, slow dying as exhausted soldiers fell until the few still on their feet all were on the same side.

Not the protagonist's side.

Desperately they tried to will themselves back up to their feet, tried to force numb fingers to close around the sword that lay in the mud beside them. But their body was done, helpless as the tired enemy soldiers picked their way closer and closer, methodically stripping bodies of any small valuables and finishing off any wounded still alive.

The protagonist prayed frantically to any god they thought might hear them. The god of war. The god of peace. The god from any temple and roadside shrine they could ever remember visiting. They wracked their brain. Dead. They'd have to pretend to be dead. They could do that. They were half there already, just slow their breathing and don't catch anyone's...

They turned their head and saw the god of war looking straight at them.

Like everyone else on the battlefield the god was spattered with blood, from her cropped hair to her armored boots. She could have been any soldier from any nation - except for the terrible red joy in her eyes as she beheld the devastation wrought.

"Hello, little sacrifice," she said without moving her lips. She pointed, and as if puppeted, one of the enemy soldiers started to turn their head -

A clean boot crunched down next to the protagonist's head. Then another, stepping carefully over them to place themselves between the god and the protagonist. The protagonist looked up at a figure straight out of their childhood.

The god of war stopped.

"Are you serious?" she sneered.

The god of the protagonist's childhood village shrine shrugged, strumming his fingers thoughtfully over the lute in his hands. Unlike the murals, the statues, he was not dressed in fine court robes but in simple traveler clothes, his hair pulled back into a plain knot. But just as the protagonist remembered, he seemed impossibly tall. Impossibly beautiful.

"Spare this one," the god asked, stilling those long clever hands on the strings. "Please. This one is mine."

The god of war laughed. "You think you can challenge me, godling? Me? Here? At the height of my strength? Flee back to whatever muddy temple you escaped from and maybe I'll let you survive, you jumped up deity of bad chords and tasteless lyrics."

"Oh, I'm no god of anything so prevalent," the protagonist's god murmured humbly. "And I'm not here to challenge you, great one. Say rather, we're here to bargain. After all, this one has something that can benefit you."

The god shot the protagonist a look. The protagonist knew this line from the stories of their childhood.

"A song!" they blurted. "A - an epic about what happened here, about you, to make all who hear it shout and weep and... and honor your name."

The god of war... paused. Tilted their head.

"A fitting tribute to your potency," their god chimed in, the melody from their lute drifting into a martial fanfare. "From a god-touched bard. Surely that makes them worth more alive than dead."

A shout went up from the other side of the field. Someone was up and swords were swinging. The god of war waved an impatient hand, already disappearing towards the fight. "Fine. But I expect my song. I'll hold you responsible, godling. I don't forget!"

She was gone and the god of the protagonist's childhood turned to look down at them. "Well," he said, reaching out a hand to pull the protagonist up. "I hope you can actually write music."

"Seems like a priority to learn," the protagonist said fervently, and their god of trickery and bargains laughed and hauled them away.

#my fiction #fantasci tumblr #you just turned a perfectly good soldier into a bard #no proofreading we die like men #gods #dnd ocs #fantasy #fantasci #100

256 notes · View notes

aestherians · 11 months

Text

A wolf therian can have blue eyes

A wolf is not just a wolf. A wolf therian doesn't have to be any specific type of wolf to be valid.

Not just in the "you don't need to know your subspecies/eye color/life history to be valid" way, but also in the "if you know all these minute details about yourself and they don't match any real wolf, that doesn't mean you're not a wolf" way.

When I first learned about therianthropy, back in '13, I ended up in a group where this was unacceptable. Wolves can't have blue eyes, alpha theory is made up, winged wolves don't exist, wolf packs don't wage war, etc., etc. And it's true, "real wolves" aren't like that. But... who's to say every wolf therian is a "real wolf"?

Set aside all thoughts of reincarnation, psychology, archetypes, etc. Why are you a wolf? What makes you a wolf? Anyone can have a past life or weird psychology or an archetypal connection to wolves, but not everyone who does so is a wolf.

A wolf therian is someone who has dreams of being a wolf, the instincts of a wolf, who pictures a wolf when they try to picture themself. Regardless of their origins, they're a wolf because "being wolf" is what comes naturally to them.

And if 'unreal' wolf traits, like blue eyes, A/B/O, or wings, is part of what comes naturally to them, alongside "wolf," then that doesn't negate their wolfishness. They may not be the same kind of wolf as you, but their core is still "wolf."

You can explain it away with "maybe they're a fictional species of wolf, so really they're fictionkind" or "maybe they're from an alternate universe where wolves have wings" or "it's just psychology, anything is possible," but all those musings are still origin-focused, instead of experience-focused, and they're a distraction from what makes a wolf a wolf.

Therianthropy is messy. It's not bound by Earthly biology. Whether your theriotype can be described as a timber wolf, an ethnozoological archetypal wolf, a fairytale wolf, a fantasy wolf, a scifi wolf, or something else entirely doesn't matter.

If you're a wolf, you're a wolf. Even if your eyes are blue and you howl at the moon.

#no proofreading we die like men #therianthropy #therian #otherkin #otherkind #i handed in my thesis and i'm back to thinking about nonhumanity :D

391 notes · View notes

nwheregirl · 9 months

Text

Picture this exact scene: (John Wick x reader, reader is described to have a specific aesthetic, vibe and look, size and predator kink mentioned, brat taming mentioned, nsfw?, written in a moment of inspiration so not proof-read).

John.

Your handsome, scary, tall and big John.

Your boyfriend, older boyfriend.

And You: a young, maybe a bit too crazy hit-woman who entered the business a few years ago. (Giving off a non-cringy Harley Quinn vibe, if you get what I mean)

Winston loves you, he treats you like a daughter. He thinks you are beautiful, and deadly.

They call you…Poison.

Sweet little thing, you are: short, petite. You always dress in hyper feminine, yet seductive clothes. Like this:

You are cocky, flirty, scandalous almost. You talk back, you are strong and deadly. You love yourself, your skills, your power.

You’re such a brat.

But when you are alone with The Boogeyman? You’re such a good girl. He makes you weak on your knees, how could he not? Look at him!

He’s mean: biting, spitting, spanking. He adores you, his princess. He’s going to make you his wife soon. He loves how you take him, how you obey, how you like to be tied up and just…used for his pleasure.

But.

One day, something changes: you decide you want to step the line. You want to have fun, to see how far your Babayaga could go.

And so, the dynamic changes into…well, this:

“Sweetheart, why am I tied up?”

He asks, his russian accent evident. His tone of voice seems calm and collected, as if he knows he’s not in a dangerous situation.

You, by the other end, just giggle. You had gotten all dolled up for him: a tight cocktail dress hugged your body, paired with black stockings and heels. A nice red fur-coat left was on a chair, with your vintage Moschino heart shaped bag that John had gifted you on your birthday.

You bite your red tinted lips as you walk closer.

“You look beautiful, babygirl”

The hit-man compliments you, his chocolate brown eyes scanning your delicious body.

He was like a wolf, ready to chase and devour his rabbit.

“Thank you, daddy!” You exclaim, twirling for him. God, you were a dream coming true. A lustful dream.

“You still haven’t answered my question, doll”

“I wanted to have some fun”

“Some fun?” He lifts his brow up. “We have a lot of fun together already, don’t you think baby?”

Only then you sit on his lap, his big muscular thighs were feeling tense. He wasn’t used to something like this.

“You are the one who has all the fun, can I have some fun too?” You faked an innocent tone: John was always the dom in your relationship. You loved it, obviously, you just wanted to piss him off. You adored when he tried to tame you.

“Are you scared you might like being the submissive one, will it hurt your ego?” You obviously tease him, and only then you feel a hand wrapped around your throat.

He has little patience.

It happened in a matter of nanoseconds, literally. How the fuck is he able to do that?

He had freed himself from the knot that had him tied up to the chair since you entered the room.

“Babygirl…”

Oh, shit.

Shit.

You’re screwed.

He sounds angry, his rich baritone making you shiver.

“You really think you can play with me? Tying me to a chair like I’m some kind of rookie?”

A cruel laugh, his lips brushing against your ear.

“Start running, babygirl. You are going to fucking regret what you did tonight”.

#keanu reeves #keanu reeves characters #john wick #john wick x reader #john wick smut #johnny silverhand #kevin lomax #john constantine #keanu imagine #john wick imagine #just a little idea #no proofreading we die like men #nwheregirl made this

266 notes · View notes

skjeinon · 1 year

Text

captain doesn’t have to know - jeremy swayman

summary: you’re patrice bergerons little sister visiting him and his family during the holidays for christmas. one so you can go to the winter classic but also to see the family- the bergerons are hosting a small dinner for any of the team that wanted to show up on christmas eve. this is where you’re reunited for the time of the better with jeremy swayman..

warnings: smut 18+ , literally the longest one person fic i’ve ever written, jeremy swayman gets a little kinky in the end, porn with plot and lots of it, no proofread which is probably an awful idea, maybe wrong wag names sorry

The environment that patty and his wife steph create for you when you visit is nothing you’ll ever take for granted, especially this year during christmas. when you arrived and got up to the guest room, you saw steph had lit candles and given you new sheets and silk pajamas for the two weeks. she had given you soaps and salts for baths and the bathroom connected to the bedroom was nothing but beautiful with amenities for you to enjoy while in their humble abode. the flight to boston had been nothing but stressful but you gave it some praise due to the fact that it had been worse two days before christmas in the past.

you knew tomorrow was their little get together so you relished in the fact that it was calmer in the house, as you turned on the lamps in your room and put on the silk pajamas that had been laid out for you. you unpacked and knew you could smell something being cooked downstairs as you saw coming in, when patrice had gone to pick you up, that steph was cooking dinner but also preparing for tomorrow night as well. you enjoyed it, knowing you’d get a nice home cooked meal. college has been kicking your ass, so home cooked meals are far and few between.

making your way downstairs, the kids were giggling as they played with toys, sitting on the floor with patrice. you walked past them, smiling at the fact that they were filled with blissful ignorance, knowing only that christmas was two days away and that tomorrow, they’d probably be brought gifts by the team to add to their collection of gifts under the tree.

seeing stephanie behind the counter, you made your way to sit on one of the stools, starting small talk with her before she asked “where are y’all’s parents for the holidays?” knowing you probably wouldn’t be in boston if it hadn’t been for some other reason.

“did patrice not tell you?” you questioned.

“he did, but i will be frank, i just don’t remember” she shrugged as she cut away at some vegetables going into a dish.

“ah, well they’re going to south america for a few days, they’re coming back up north to boston for the winter classic though” you said as you watched her hands move expertly. in the few seconds of silence, she got an idea and smiled “would you like to try some of this soup? it’s for tomorrow night but i need a good judge.” you smiled and nodded and she gave you a bowl, which sparked thoughts in your noggin.

“so who’s coming tomorrow? to the party” you said as you took a spoonful into your mouth, as you swallowed you gave her compliments on it and smiled. she smiled at your compliments before thinking on the question.

“oh well, brad, his wife and kids, mcavoy, jeremy and jake, taylor and linus and linus’ wife, nick and his kids and probably a few other kids or girlfriends or even players. i cook to feed an army so that everyone is well fed.” she shrugged, she began to clean up, wiping down the counters before pulling some plates out. it was time for dinner and after dinner maybe you’d go and take a bath after. but alas, right now you were about to chow down. “dinner time!!” steph shouted, the kids and patty walked into the kitchen ready to eat.

—

that night you found yourself in the bathroom, in the tub taking a warm bath while you looked through instagram, taking every name you remembered and searching them on instagram. it wasn’t as if you forgot names or faces but in reality you hadn’t been around the team enough in the last few years to remember them all perfectly, especially the older guys. you knew you liked jeremy, i mean you were following him on instagram and he followed you but honestly, even then you didn’t know him super well. you thought he was cute but you thought charlie was also cute.. even david- besides the point. you continued your adventure before you shaved and washed yourself down. you found yourself back in the silk pajamas and soon enough in bed. you had another long day ahead of you so you knew sleeping early would strongly be to your benefit.

the moment you laid down, you honestly knocked out, sleeping well into the morning, showing further how tired you were when you woke up to knocking on your door before the kids ran in to wake you up. “auntie!!” they chanted before attacking you in bed, shaking you before you sat up. smiling, you held them and shook them around before patrice came and got them. “cmon kids, aunt y/n needs her beauty sleep.” he smiled as they ran to him, gently closing your door before you got out of bed.

“i guess that was a good wake up call..” you mumbled as you looked at the clock, seeing as it said 9:56 am. you realized you slept in so late and almost cringed a little before you went and brushed your hair, teeth and washed your face. instead of remaining in your pajamas, you simply changed into some simple clothes for the day and made your way downstairs.

“morning sunshine” stephanie said as you walked into the kitchen, she was cleaning up from breakfast but pulled the plate with your food on it from the microwave. she sat it down as you sat down and offered you some coffee before she went back to doing what she was doing. her and patrice had been cleaning the house and cooking some more already, as they wanted to take the kids ice skating before the party tonight. to not only fire them out a little but to give them a nice skating experience on a nice day like christmas eve.

as you finished eating, everything for the day was set in motion and everyone finished getting ready to leave the house. you joined them in ice skating and the outing was a success. you all had fun but coming back home, you knew you’d probably be sore the next day. to relieve this, you took a warm shower before everyone planned to arrive, doing your makeup and hair as well. you picked out a dress to wear that night way before you had even packed to come to boston. it was a deep red, crushed velvet dress that held your hips while puffed out at the sleeves. you had white tights and black boots with it , and it was almost santa-ish when you looked in the mirror. looking at yourself, you felt cute and hoped to gain something from it. whether it was compliments from wives or the kids saying “you’re so pretty!” you hoped to gain something.

you walked down the stairs and saw the tree lit up with all the other gorgeous lights and christmas decorations lit up. you smiled and walked through the living room to see the dining room and eating area near the kitchen set with gorgeous dining areas and beautiful centerpieces. you walked into the kitchen, it being empty as steph was with the kids helping them get ready. patty walked in and was wearing a nice button up. “you look nice” you smiled to him and he nodded. “same to you. i hope you feel good about tonight. i know it may be weird for you to spend christmas eve with the boys and not mom and dad.” he said leaning into one of the chairs at the bar top. you shrugged.

“it’s fine. i think i’ll enjoy myself.” you smiled, before hearing the sound of a knock at the door. you hustled to the door with patrice following behind you. you answered the door with a smile, it was brad, sloane and the kids. he smiled seeing you- “Y/N Bergeron, who dragged you into town!”he smiled before offering you a hug as him and his family walked in. the rest of the night when letting people in, it was all very similar except for when jeremy saw you…

he was one of the last ones to show up, fashionably late with flowers for stephanie and some baked goods for desert. you were on door opening duty while stephanie and patrice hosted. opening the door, you saw his tall thin stature walk up to the door. “hi!” you smiled and he stared at you for a moment, silent before he realized he needed to speak. “h-hello! i didn’t realize you were coming into town-” he laughed, his cheeks turning pink. “it’s good to see you.” he smiled walking in. you closed the door behind him, offering to take the flowers from him. “it’s good to see you too..” you smiled up at him, but he simply was staring. you thought that maybe he was a little dumb but seeing him this shocked at your presence made your cheeks burn.

you walked with him into the area everyone else had made themselves home at. a few guys waved to him and charlie stared at you for a moment before staring back at him as you walked through the living room to the kitchen. charlie gave jeremy a thumbs up- against my own knowledge. standing in the kitchen, you showed steph the flowers that jeremy had brought her and ordered him to sit down the dish he brought with him. the rest of the girls who stood with steph talking complimented the flowers which just made jeremy’s cheeks burn brighter before he dismissed himself.

“hey y/n?” sloane said as you cut the ends of the flowers off to put them in a vase.

“yes?” you turned your head, looking at her as you placed the flowers into the vase. she noticed the way jeremy stared at you and was curious.

“do you and jeremy talk outside of when you come to boston?” she asked , you were a little confused but complied. “uh, no not really. sometimes we chat, like he’ll respond to a story i’ve posted. we’ve had a few long conversations before though” you shrugged and went back to looking at the flowers.

“hm, do y’all talk a lot when you come to town?” she said , thinking ab other events that you had attended with him present.

“yeah i’d say so. he’s probably the easiest to talk to. we’re pretty close in age and he’s super sweet.” you smiled to her, trying to figure out what she was getting at. you knew that the moment you finished in here, you’d go into the living room and sit next to him and you both would pick up a conversation like you didn’t have lapses in speaking.

“hm- okay!” she nodded her head and continued on before you interrupted her. “wait- why do you ask?”

“jeremy was red in the face the moment you walked him in here.. i just think he likes you.” sloane spoke with the utmost confidence while steph and janelle agreed. a small smile came to your face, because you knew you had fond thoughts of him but just never chose to say or do anything about it because it never seemed right. i mean he’s the goalie for your older brothers team. it’s not like jeremy is older than patty or anything but it just seems wrong. the whole team will be on his ass if he breaks your heart. that’s caps sister.

your heart ached a little before you walked back into the living room, seeing the empty seat next to him where you felt as if you had seen someone sitting in before but you ignored it as you came and sat next to him.

“so- how have you been?” he said, looking down at you with a smile. you turned to face him, his eyes shining with the christmas lights that decorated the room. “i’ve been good.. how about you?” you said, nudging him slightly. “it’s been good. being apart of a professional sports team isn’t the least physically demanding job yknow, but i get by.” he smiled, leaning back against the couch. you did the same, getting comfortable. “you started your senior year this year right?” he asked, watching as you turned to look at him.

“yeah it did, it’s going pretty good. senioritis hasn’t really hit me yet, i’m hoping it doesn’t. the faster i can get to boston to stay, the faster i’ll be glad college is nearing its end.” you spoke, your body a little closer to his as you turned to speak to him easier, your hands at your thighs, playing with the hem of your dress.

“oh- you’re coming to boston after college??” he said, trying to hide his excitement. “how come?”

“i was offered a job with the boston celtics once i graduate” you looked down, staring at your hands, hiding the joy on your face.

“seriously?? that’s awesome, y/n!!” he say up, placing his hand on your arm, almost overjoyed at the idea of you getting a successful job with someone so soon.

“i know right!!” you giggled, looking up at him. he had a beaming smile on his face and you were just a little stunned at how … cute.. he was. your cheeks were warm as you looked away, and before you knew it, dinner was called. the growing tension was broken as he pulled his hand away from your arm to stand up, but when he stood up, he noticed your heels and offered you his hand. “mlady..” he smiled as you took his hand, he kissed it gingerly, watching you stand up from your seat.

“why thank you, kind sir..” you smiled back, squeezing his hand before letting go, him following behind you as you went to get food. Filling your plates, everyone scattered to the different seating areas, you finding yourself in the dining room, one of the first to sit down. after a few minutes, jeremy walked into the dining room. “do you mind if i sit with you?” he asked, pointing to the seat next to you. you shook your head, he came by and joined in by sitting with you at the table. others came and sat down around the two of you, but a small bubble formed around the two of you as you both talked and giggled over stupid stuff that no one at the table would get like the two of you.

when you finished your food, you got out of your seat after speaking to him saying “are you done? i can take your plate..”. this resulted in him also getting up, he followed you to the kitchen and the two of you were standing alone in the kitchen while you cleaned off your plate and his. most people had migrated back to the living room if they weren’t still chatting at the table. everyone who had finished, respectfully had cleaned off their plates and you praised them silently for it.

jeremy walked around, picking from the ham left out. you turned around and snapped at him. “hey! knock it off” a laugh fell from your lips, grabbing a towel to dry off your hands.

“i’m sorry!” he stuffed a piece into his mouthc watching you throw away the paper towel. you walked over to him and stood against the countertop after having grabbed a small piece for yourself. he turned to watch you, placing his hand on one side of you to lean against the counter rather than standing on all his weight.

“you’re here for the winter classic right?” he said, staring down into your eyes, he was good at eye contact in conversations. you nodded, swallowing before giving an answer.

“i have to go home like the day after, but i definitely am.. why do you ask?”

“oh well.. uh i was wondering if you wanted to go out and get breakfast or lunch or coffee or something one day.. while you’re still here. you should even come to the game on saturday or something.. i won’t be here tuesday or wednesday..” he almost kicked himself when he said the last bit. of course you knew he wouldn’t be here, his captain is your brother.

“are you asking me out, jeremy?” you tilted your head over against your shoulder, giving him a devious little smile.

“yeah.. i think i am.” he said leaning in a little closer, arrogance washing over him a little. confidence came easy when girls gave into his flirtatious acts. “i should’ve done it a long time ago.” he said as he leaned closer to you. your cheeks burned a dark red as he got closer. you took a moment in your head to acknowledge what he was wearing.

it was a dark brown flannel, jeans and some boots that matched the rest of the outfit. his sleeves were rolled around his wrist and his hands that you thought were usually bare, had a nice little bracelet around his wrist. everything about him just screamed he was more than an athlete. he seemed so genuine and soft with what he wore. you knew he was outdoorsy and you thought that was super cute about him. his face was gentle, and facial hair always fit how he looked. you’d thought in passing about how it would feel to kiss him, but right now as he inched closer, you thought about it now more than you ever had in your time knowing him.

“yeah?..” you spoke in almost a whisper, allowing him to come closer, as he placed his other hand down next to you.

“mhm” he hummed, coming in closer. “is it too soon to kiss you?” he said, a short laugh falling through his words. you shook your head and he placed his lips against yours, pulling himself in closer, with his legs on either side of you, a hand coming to hold the side of your face as your lips fit almost perfectly to his.

his were soft despite the constant chill he finds himself in. he couldn’t stop thinking ab the strawberry taste on your lipgloss. he would kiss you forever if it meant he’d taste it over and over again. slowly, he pulled away with a smirky little look on his face before he let go of your cheek and stood up straight. “we’ve spent too long not talking to each other enough..” the two of you let out a gentle laugh at his words.

“i’ve always been fond of you.” you shrugged as you stood up on your feet, stepping out from under him. before walking away, to join people in the living room, you have him a quick kiss on the cheek. “i can’t wait for you to take me on a date, jer.” you spoke in his ear before joining everyone else.

you sat with him for the rest of the night, but honestly couldn’t stop thinking about how you managed to pull him in a simple few hours. you had always wanted him and how you finally had him.. life is on your side.

you also just couldn’t get his lips off your mind… ugh.

—

christmas came and went.. it was a lovely day but honestly you couldn’t get your mind off of jeremy. that night after he went home, the two of you chatted almost the entire night until you forced yourself to sleep, knowing the kids would just wake you up in the morning. they did. but in that night where you talked to jeremy, you had decided where you would go and you decided thursday after they had come home, you’d go and get dinner together.

dinner was intimate, but maybe not as intimate as breakfast. patrice still doesn’t know but as long as jeremy can keep it a secret, you’ll be flying smooth. on the two nights they were gone, you helped steph a lot, hanging out with her and getting deep into conversation with her as well. you folded and told her about jeremy, but only so she could help keep it a secret.

“me and jeremy are going to dinner when they come home tomorrow ..” you hummed to her, thinking about it, but also just needing to see if she could cover for you. “i don’t want to tell patrice.. do you have any idea of how to cover it?”

“aww that’s so cute.. did he ask you out at dinner?” she said, sitting down, handing you a warm cup of tea, thinking about a resolution to your problem.

“yeah he did..” you smiled, looking down at your mug, trying not to blush at the basic idea of it.

“well, do you have any friends here? any that you just like don’t keep much contact with?” steph asked

you shook your head.

“what if you just pretended to be going on a date” she shrugged. you honestly thought that was probably the best idea and nodded your head.

“oh yeah, that’s definitely a good idea- especially cause i’ll probably be dressed up. you’re brilliant!” you smiled, leaning back into the couch, taking a sip of your tea. the kids had been laid to bed a bit ago, but you and steph stayed up watching the hockey game. you had watched the game the night before when jeremy had played, later that night you talked to him until he forced himself to sleep- he was bummed about the overtime loss against the senators. tonight linus was playing. you didn’t know linus that well, you wish you did though. he seems very sweet and you know that him and jeremy were very close.

that night you slept in peace knowing that they’d be home in short time tomorrow, their game only having been in new jersey. you spoke to him a little after the game but you were just tired and maybe a little over excited about the dinner date to come. waking up the next day, it was probably the most peaceful day so far because somehow steph got the kids out of the house with her to run errands before you even woke up. when you woke up it was late morning and you had 1. a goodmorning text from jer, 2. a text explaining why steph and the kids were gone and 3. a text from patrice saying what time they’d land and be home, but it was to a group chat with you and steph in it. you thought it was a little silly, but carried on.

over the day, you drank a nice cup of coffee while staring out the window, the day being not totally gloomy but a few grey clouds in the sky. you then ate something for breakfast before going to your room to take a long bath. in the almost hour and a half you spend in the bath you end up shaving your legs, doing a face mask and washing your face, preparing to wash your hair and simply just thinking about that guy you were gonna see tonight.

after washing your hair and body, you got out and did the rest of your routine, hoping this late morning was shifting quickly into a late afternoon which it was. Patrice, Steph and the kids have come home at this point, which helps you gauge where jeremy is in his day, though you knew anyways as between everything you’ve chatted with him. he got home almost an hour ago… two hours ago… oh god you’re just behind on everything you need to get done.

he was getting you at 5 and after stalling in the bath, while also stalling between coffee and breakfast and breakfast and picking clothes and picking clothes and a bath- time slipped away from you, so now you had to get hair and makeup done in the time between now and five..

you hustled and hustled until you were satisfied, seeing that text from him saying “i’m on my way now” made it all worth it, as you kicked your shoes out of your way to sit down on the bed for a moment, taking a deep breath. you flailed your hands around your face, fanning it before you leaned over pulling your shoes on, they were boots, leaving you a few inches taller than you were with them off. you grabbed your things and made your way downstairs.

steph and the kids were sitting in the living room watching a movie, patrice was in the kitchen making dinner.

“wow!!” steph exclaimed, prompting you to give a small twirl while the kids stared in awe before exclaiming how pretty you looked. patrice walked over, observing how you looked. “where ya goin, pip?”

“i have a date with someone i met on a dating app” you shrugged with a small smile. he nodded quickly and turned around to go back into the kitchen.

“does he have a jacket you can wear? it’s chilly outside..” he said, referring to your dress. it wasn’t short but alas it was a dress, you’d be chilly no matter what.

“yeah i’m sure he does..” you felt your phone buzz in your hand, you looked down to see his text light up your phone. “oh goodness, he’s here! okay! bye!! love y’all!!” you said as you slipped out the front door, hustling so that the chances of patrice seeing his vehicle were low.

he unlocked the car and the moment you got in, his infectious smile grew. “hey..” he said, leaning over his center console. you gently kissed him on his lips. “hi..” you smile in response to his own.

“how was the fight?” you asked as you pulled the seatbelt over your lap, staring at him as he pulled his car into drive, his eyes stuck on the road.

“ah it was good.. little bumpy but it’s a cloudy day, i can’t complain..” he shrugged, one hand on the wheel, while another leaned into the center console. his hand was sickeningly close to yours, you held your breath hoping he’d move closer. “how has it been since christmas? anything new you haven’t told me about?”

“ah no.. but i convinced patrice i was going on a date with some guy i met online, tonight..” a giggle left your lips, seeing the slight part of his lips from shock.

“you devious little fuck” he laughed. the two of you acted like two teenagers who were forbidden to see each other in some world where your two families or something were at odds. it was fun to act that way, even though you being with jeremy maybe wasn’t as big of a deal as you both made it out to be.

the drive was filled with small laughs and conversations, talking about some tv show you both had watched in passing and favorite movies and actors. his hand slowly sat atop of yours before you got to the restaurant, somewhere in downtown boston you honestly had never been to. when arriving, he opened your door for you, helping you out and continuing to hold your hand as the two of you walked to the entrance. he was nothing but a gentleman.. it really shocked you how calm he was about everything, especially because of how he acted when he first saw you on that saturday night.

though you thought he was calm, in his head his thoughts were racing. he controlled his big smile and blushing face while just thinking about you. your dress was flattering and he tried his best to keep innocent eyes on you. he wanted everything right, so much lead up to this that he needed it to end right- he needed it to end with you.

sitting through dinner was nothing but pleasurable, especially when you shared desert with him, watching as whipped cream sat on his upper lip. “jer, lick your lips please” and as he did, he realized why you spoke your request. he was so.. silly and always had something funny to say. he was never super witty or rude, but was silly. he paid for dinner in whole, and you suppose maybe it was the fact that he was a hockey player and was rich or maybe that he was just a gentleman but you felt flattered by the gesture.

leaving, the two of you slowly walked back to his car.. slowly. you knew you didn’t want to leave him, he felt the same way. standing outside of his vehicle, the two of you stopped. he leaned over you and you stared into those mesmerizing eyes.. thinking about whatever he could possibly be thinking. in silence, he leaned closer to you, and before you knew it the two of you were kissing again.

his hand came to your cheek and pulled you just a little closer. while your hands were against his chest, slowly pushed their way up to his neck wrapping around the back of it. your kiss was deepened by the closer contact until you pulled away to take a breath.

“you should come back to my place..” he spoke quietly, barely above a whisper. the close contact made his silence so loud to you. you nodded and a smile spread across his cheeks. you kissed him once more, then again and again very quickly before the two of you let go of each other so that he could let you into his car so he could drive you back to his. when he got back in and began to drive, his hand ended back over on your side of the car, this time now on your thigh…

he lived in some nice apartments, and when standing in the elevator together, your hand brushed against his before you linked your pinky with his. he walked you down his hallway and as you got to his door, you stood there very patiently as he nervously fumbled with his keys. he got the two of you inside and you were almost in awe at how clean it was. he lived lavishly, not in an irresponsible way, but in a way that shows he spent a lot of time and money in making it his home.

he offered you to sit on his couch while he poured the two of you a glass of wine, but you turned down the offer, instead you asked if he had any sodas or .. whatever they called it in alaska. he nodded and asked

“is coke okay? i don’t drink it very often i just keep it mostly for guests.”

and you nodded as you sat down. “sorry i didn’t want a glass, i don’t wanna somehow end up in any situation where i’m hungover tomorrow” you claimed as he offered for you to pull your shoes off and you complied. you already had a drink or two already so you were satisfied anyways when he came over and handed you the can.

“glass or anything?” he asked, standing above you, watching you as you shook your head. he nodded and as he moved to sit down, you spontaneously grabbed the collar of his jacket and pulled him down to kiss you. he responded by quickly sitting down, deepening the kiss while placing his palm on your thigh, gently squeezing it as you pulled him closer.

“mhh” a soft sound left him before you pulled away.

“yes?” you asked quickly “is this not okay? i’m sorry if i got the wrong-“

“what? no! i was just trying to get a little more comfortable i’m sorry.” he said through a chuckle. your face flushed, a little embarrassed.

“how would you like me to sit for you?” you asked, trying to make both of you comfortable.

“you can sit in my lap?” he asked and you nodded, waiting for him to turn so you could sit in his lap, placing your legs on either side of his. the way he stared at you as you were just barley elevated above him made your stomach twist. his eyes glowed as he placed his hands on your sides, his palms cradling your hips while his fingers gently squeezed the sides of your belly.

you leaned over him and as he turned his head back to meet you, you kissed him. this time it was all more passionate than the last. your hands moved to his shoulders, one closer up his neck before it was holding his face. slow kisses turned into his tongue pressed against yours. his hands slowly moved around your body, down your thighs before taking a gentle squeeze. your dress began to ride up your thighs and helplessly, you allowed him to hold your bare legs, refusing to stop him as his palms held your ass.

your hands on the other hand, moved down, trying to pull at his jacket to get it off of him. breaking the kiss, you whispered “jer..” loud enough to make him stop so he could remove his blazer, while underneath having a dark button down on, something easy for you when you’re kissing him again.

he held you with one hand while the two of you worked together to get the jacket off, before throwing it somewhere else in the living room. the two of you were back to your stupid little tango of touching each other while messily making out, maybe too scared to go further until someone else makes a move.

as you two moved some more, you began to unbutton his shirt.. slowly getting further down to his belt that held his shirt between his skin and pants.

“jeremy..” you spoke softly, separating from him.

“yes, baby?” he said, staring at you, his hands pushing under your dress against your back. your cheeks burned at the word “baby.”

“i need these clothes gone.. yours and mine-” you were embarrassed at the words, you felt needy.. ugh.

“do you want to go to my bedroom instead of the couch?” he asked, his eyes bore into yours. he was mostly trying to ignore your chest in front of him, but was also just trying to seem as confident as possible.

“sure.” you smiled down at him, the question seeming so personal. he made sure he had a good grip around your ass as he picked you up, wrapping your legs around his waist, leaning into his shoulder as he carried you to his room. your hands were linked around his neck as he opened the door, kissing your cheek before placing you down on his plush bed.

you took a moment to observe his room, with big window and gorgeous design, it matched the rest of the apartment. it was clean and his sheets smelled nice- thank god the boy respected himself this much.

“do you think i could take off your dress?” he said, pulling away as he sat you down to get a good look at you as he asked. you nodded and watched as he tried to contain a smile into a sly smirk as he took his hands and slowly pulled the soft material from above your hips up past your belly, chest and then over your head after saying “lift your arms” kindly.

as he threw the dress elsewhere, he observed what you wore underneath. it wasn’t matching on purpose, but definitely had that effect. your bra was a soft yellow while your panties were a lacy black. the bra had a clip in the front while the back had more lace connecting the bra together. “i um..” he blushed as he stared at you.

“sorry- it .. wasn’t super on purpose..” you laughed nervously but he shook his head.

“no, don’t apologize- it’s perfect” his eyes met yours, both of your cheeks burning before he leaned down over you to kiss you. as he did so, he used his free hand to unbuckle his belt and then push down his pants. his shirt remained buttoned as he slowly pushed you back farther onto the bed until you were fully laying down. your hands moved to his shirt and slowly unbuttoned it, until you were reaching down far enough to struggle. he pulled away, unbuttoning the shirt before pulling it off of him. you examined his thin but fit body before he leaned back over you and kissed you again.

he moved past your lips and was kissing at your neck, leaving soft kisses on your skin while he slowly moved down to the valley between your breasts. his hand slowly slid up the side of your ribcage, feeling very divot in your skin before taking your breast into his hand, as he began to kiss at the skin under your bra. he used his free hand to pull the fabric to the side as he kissed and sucked at your soft skin. eventually he switched everything, kissing at the other while holding the previously kissed. after much impatience, he fully sat up again-

“can i take it off?” he said, his hands placed against your ribs, cupping your bra. you nodded.. before speaking

“yeah you can.” you had a small smile on your face as he seemed satisfied with himself as you had said yes. he had you sit up a little and as you were nose to nose with him again, you pressed your lips to his as he unhooked your bra. as he did, he threw it to the side and laid you back down, moving back down between your breasts. as he sucked and kissed at the soft flesh, his knee was placed against your panties, allowing you to helplessly grind against his bare thigh as he sucked at your hardening nipples.

while your ground against his thigh, gentle and weak moans left your lips, until he pulled his thigh away, letting a soft apology leave his lips as he moved down your stomach in kisses, making his way down to your thighs. he asked quickly if he could pull off your panties, and as he did, he kissed at your thighs until he could fully have access to your cunt. it was dripping, and you knew it was as he let out a soft groan as he got a good look at you. he leaned in, a kiss pressing against your clit before his tongue gently licked over it. he replaced his tongue with his thumb momentarily, moving down so he could drag his tongue through your folds. tasting your slick cunt, he tries not to groan as he begins to eat you out, taking you like he was a starving man. his thumb rubbed at your clit, creating a steady rhythm. after a while he switched, beginning to finger you while licking at your clit. your legs began to shake as he flicked at your clit.

“j-jer..” his name fell from your lips as your hips began to buck into his face. “fuck.. jeremy..” you cried out, your head thrown back while your hands came to his hair, gently pulling at his soft curls. he began to work with more pressure, him fingering you a little faster, as he felt your legs shake and press his head between your thighs he knew you were at your edge- and as you cried out his name, your back coming off of the bed, he got the satisfaction of feeling your legs tighten around his head until you could finally come down from your high.

he slowly sat up, leaning over your to kiss you before he looked at your flushed face. your eyes were doughy as you stared at him.

“you okay?” he spoke softly, moving your hair out of your face. you nodded and he smiled. “you need some water?” and you nodded again. “do you have any words?”

“yeah.. i’m just saving them for later..” you teased, poking him in the belly before he rolled his eyes, getting out of the bed to go and get you a glass of water. as he walked back, you observed his body, seeing the trail of ginger hair that trailed down his midriff. you stared at his frame, he had so much muscle on his skinny frame, almost making you drool before you sat up to take the water. he handed it to you, sitting down next to you. you tilted your head back, downing almost the entire glass.

when you finished, he took the glass from you and placed it on the bedside table. the slender guy leaned over you and pressed a few kisses against your mouth. “you ready for a second round?” he moved your hair from your neck as he looked down at your body. “yeah i think so..” you smiled.

“would you maybe want to ride me? if not it’s okay..” and you looked up at him, nodding. you wanted to stare at him and just everything about him. “you sure?” he asked.

“yes i’m sure , jer.” you smiled softly as you sat up a little more, urging him to sit down so you could sit in his lap.

as the two of your switched around, he relaxed into the back of the bed frame, allowing you to sit on the lower halves of his thighs, looking down at how his boxers were low on his hips, doing nothing to hide that hardon he had in his boxers.

“can i take them off?” you asked, your hands around his hips. and as he gave you a “yeah” of confirmation, your fingers hooked in the elastic, pulling them from his legs. he pushed his head back, his cheeks a little red from embarrassment before you stared at him for a moment.. your mind was racing as you took your hand and gently wrapped it around his cock.

“nice..” you mumbled, feeling his veins against your soft palms. he was hard in your hand as your fingers barely met in a ring to your thumb. your slowly began to stroke him, observing his abdomen before he finally pushed his head back forward to look at you, watching as you sat there stroking his cock.

“fuck..” he groaned as you rubbed your thumb over the tip of his cock. his hair was a mess from you pulling at it, which only added to the effect of his heavy breaths, soft groans and flushed face. “fuck.. baby- i just.. please just ride me don’t do me like this…” he whined in his deep voice, forcing you to listen. he was so fucking hot.

“yeah okay..” you rolled your eyes, sitting up to place a kiss against his lips. your hand was placed on his chest to hold yourself up while your other hand held his cock, directing it to press against your cunt. his hands came up to your sides, as the tip pressed against entrance. “j-jer..” you whimpered. and again he realized that he had you in the palm of his hand while you began to sink yourself onto him,

“fuck..” you whined, your hands moving up to his neck, wrapping around the back of his neck. your head fell forward, trying to keep yourself composed. his hand moved to the back of your head, tangling into your soft hair, trying to comfort you.

“shhh.. babydoll..” he cooed while he himself tried to stay composed, having mumbled some curses while you took his cock. as you finally adjusted to him, while he fit perfectly inside of you, he helped you begin to fuck yourself on his cock. his hands were on your hips, helping raise them off of his cock. once your legs gained their strength back, he allowed you to hold yourself up on your knees.

“why don’t i fuck you baby..” he spoke softly his mouth close to your ear. he held your hips high as he thrusted his cock up into your cunt. you placed your face in the crook of his neck, your hot breath against his neck as he slowly thrusted into you. his breath was heavy, groans leaving him as you whimpered his name.

“f-fuck.. i’m sorry i-“ you whined, trying to apologize for not being able to ride him like he wanted.

“shh.. it’s okay baby- this is better anyways” he had a smirk on his face, thinking about how not only he was fucking the girl of his dreams, but he had her like putty in his hands. your moans came out in whines and moans as he began to thrust into you just a little harder.

“oh please. jeremy…” you cried, your breath sending goosebumps across his skin.

“yeah baby? tell me..” his hands gripped your hips, his hands on your ass as he thrusted into you.

“it feels.. so good..” your words were drawn out as you called out to him. your eyes rolled back , gasping as he pounded your guts in, increasing his pace and thrust as he fucked into you. your words soon became a slurred mess as he ruined your brain.

he could feel himself getting closer, as his muscles tightened. his grip on you became harder and as you neared the same fate, you struggled to hold yourself up on your knees.

“just a little longer baby.. just a little bit. i can tell you’re about to cum..” he said as he struggled through clenched teeth and holding back on cumming.

“please.. jeremy.. let me- jer please..” you strung together as your knees began to give out. “f-fuck!”

he finally gave in. “okay baby cum for me” he spoke softly, pulling you down on his dick. he held back. he needed to be able to ask if he could cum inside and he was just torturing himself to not let himself go. he let you sit there on his cock, your walls squeezing around him as you sat there with your hands gripping his shoulders while your face was pushed into his neck. you could barely think but as you came down from your high, you just realized he hadn’t cum.

“can i cum inside of you..” he was quiet about it, the room was quiet and it seemed a little awkward.

“oh i’m so sorry i didn’t tell you- yes jer you can.. i’m on something.” you smiled, kissing his neck affirming my before he suddenly picked you up and turned you over, laying you on your back before he was on top of you, pushing his dick inside of you. before you could say anything you were overcome by his cock deep inside of you again, pressing against that weak spot that caused you to whimper.

he took your leg, pushing it over his shoulder, leaning forward. “cmon baby.. do you think you can cum again..” he said as he began to not just thrust into you. he began to fuck you. his free hand was placed on your lower abdomen, reminding you and him of who your cunt belonged to now as he was gonna pump you full of his thick cum.

“oh my god.. baby..” he groaned , almost drowning out your own overstimulated cries. his thrusts were wild and lacked rhythm but probably felt better than anything else as he intended to make you cum as he filled you up.

“fuck im so close.. cum for me again baby.” you could feel it coming as he demanded for it again. “im gonna fill you up, i’m gonna fuck this cunt full..” he threw his head back, groaning deeply again. your body was shaking as he grabbed your other leg, pushing it over his shoulder. you could hear the slapping as he fucked you as hard as you’ve ever been fucked.

“god im gonna cum- baby i’m gonna cum inside of you” he finally said before his cock , which filled you entirely, was fully inside of you, pumping his thick cum all over your walls. he leaned over , pushing your legs with him, showing him how flexible you truly were as your third orgasm came with it. the feeling of his cum inside of you did nothing but send you over the edge, the both of y’all’s moans and groans mixing together to create the most annoying neighbors ever.

his name fell from your lips until you could finally think again. he was still buried deep inside of you as you came back from your high. he sat there, your legs still to your chest.

“you can stay inside of me all you want, but i would like to have legs that work tomorrow..” you said, running your hands through his hair. he nodded and said he sat up, he kissed you quickly before he moved back, letting your legs fall to his sides. he then thrusted into you one more time for good measure.. but mostly just to see your cute reaction to his big cock.

slowly, he began to pull out, staring as the cum became to seep out of your cunt.

“yeah.. i think this date was a success..” he teased as he got up, resisting the urge to lick your creamy pussy. he got up and found a clean pair of boxers before running off to his bathroom go get you a washcloth to get everything cleaned up.

“me too..” you responded as he came back. he got down between your legs and gently cleaned you up before placing a kiss against you clit. he gave you a clean pair of his boxers and a t-shirt to wear.

“you should spend the night..” he said as he handed you the clothes. you nodded in agreement while putting them on. you looked at yourself in the mirror, seeing smudged makeup and a very tired girl with a very cute guy in the background to the mirror. he came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist, kissing your ear and your cheek until you turned your head to kiss his lips. “you’re beautiful…” he said in the softest tone you’ve ever heard from him. “let’s lay down..”

you ended up staying the night and sleeping in late the next morning. the two or you slept, cuddled up like bears. the two of you knew that this secret relationship wouldn’t be a secret very long, especially with you being in boston for another week or so but however much time you could savor with jeremy was enough. you’d be moving back soon anyways but until then

captain doesn’t have to know..

#skjeinon speaks #jeremy swayman #boston bruins imagine #boston bruins #nhl writing #nhl fanfic #nhl imagine #nhl fluff #nhl fic #nhl fanfiction #nhl bruins #goalie love #no proofreading we die like men

466 notes · View notes

ambers-archive · 3 months

Text

who am i, darling to you (ii)

surrender to the sound

The low hum of the engine came to life as you found your seat on the plane.

"So, let's go over what we know. The unsub targets honeymooning couples, but the question is, how does he manage to catch them off guard?" Hotch asked

He was seated across from you, and you pretended not to notice his eyes occasionally drowning into yours.

You flipped around your case file, while your other hand was clutching onto your favorite book.

You know it inside out: it was your grandmother's favorite, and apparently your mother's as well.

Some of the pages still smell like the incense she used, and her hair oil.

It’s a relic, or time capsule you think. One of bedtime stories, sleepless nights, and memories just out of reach.

"Given the lack of signs of struggle at the crime scenes, it's possible that the unsub is either surprising them or has some form of control that keeps them compliant." Reid chimed in sitting next to you.

You two got along really well, he was the first one to strike a conversation with you since joining the team. Few days into your reassignment to the team he approached your desk.

You were reading: And then there were none.

He complimented your taste and went on to analyze it himself. "You know, one of the most intriguing aspects of the book is how it delves into the psychology of guilt and remorse. Each character in the story is haunted by their past actions, and their guilt ultimately becomes their downfall."

And just like that he became one of your best friends.

Emily offered you and Spencer some coffee as she took the seat across from you. You smiled at her; all of them were like family to you. Emily and Penelope, the sisters you never had.

And JJ like to the mother always wanted.

Sometimes you look around and can’t believe you have people around you, who love you, and want to spend time with you.

It was nice, everyone on the team was really welcoming.

Even Hotch, well as welcoming as he can be.

At first you would get a brief nod from him, and sometimes when you delivered a profile correctly, a slight raise of his eyebrows and some stolen glances which you kept close to your heart.

Recently though you’ve been getting occasional smiles, few compliments, and brief moments of laughter. But quick as they come, quicker they disappear.

Morgan leaned forward from his seat next to Hotch, "But how does he target his victims in the first place? I mean, we're talking about well-prepared honeymooners, not easy targets."

"He could be monitoring their activities before attacking. The unsub might be studying them, learning their routines, and finding the perfect moment without raising suspicion." You said, it felt almost scary to you, the way you're able to dissect their behaviors, putting yourself in the mind of a serial killer, profiling, and going over the most heartbreaking cases.

You hunt, just like they did.

And the patterns he left on the women are still stuck in the back of your head. He hates women.

(That much is clear)

"This type of power play, especially if it were done post-mortem, suggests a level of sadism." You continued. "These women most likely represent a source of his resentment."

“So we're dealing with an unsub who targets couples, targets the women specifically, and is able to go into their rooms undetected." Emily said, "Should be easy enough."

“Emily and I can go to the resort, ask for their security footage. There’s gotta be something we can find out.” Morgan said.

“Since you have experience with sexual assault cases you and Reid go see autopsy results. See if these marks were post-mortem." Hotch said, looking over at you and Reid.

You were relieved you weren't paired with him, you overthought every decision around him.

And you could barely look him in the eye, your words often died out at the tip of your throat: impossible to convey words of much intelligence.

The air in the coroner's office was thick.

Of course temperature wise it was cool, and airy. Detached and void of anything warm. the victims bodies told so many stories.

"These markings: they're deep stab wounds. They were also done post-mortem," Dr. Fields stated. "They are precise, not hesitation wounds—he knew what he was doing from the beginning."

"He seems to be targeting their femininity. This stems from a deep hatred for women," Spencer muttered.

"Or a woman," You interjected.

"You think these victims are surrogates for someone else in his life?"

"The time and effort it takes someone to inflict these wounds takes determination. This sort is indicative of someone affected by past trauma."

"What can we know about husbands?" Spencer asked, redirecting the focus to the examiner.

"Whereas the women died from strangulation, the men were drowned, and it's assumed they were drowned in their hotel bathtub," Dr. Fields responded

"So he takes his time with the women, gets it over with with the men?" Spencer asked.

"The time of death for the male victims was hours earlier than their wives. Maybe he wanted to eliminate the competition, wanted to enjoy his time alone with them?" You suggested.

ʚ ═══･୨ ꕤ ୧･═══ ɞ

"Strauss wants a briefing on this case." Hotch announced walking into the makeshift briefing room. It was a tiny station in a small town in Florida.

Emily snorted, "So she can question everything we have so far about the profile?"

"I'm not sure, but it sounded urgent that she wants to talk to the whole team." Hotch replied by opening the laptop and starting the call to Quantico.

"Hello agents." Strauss said as the call came to life, holding up the case files. "The director called, he wants to consider you going undercover. Due to the high popularity of this resort, and the timing in which these murders are being committed-"

"We might need to understand his patterns from within the environment he operates in." Hotch finished for her,

A collective pause filled the room, and their words hung in the air, an uneasy silence passed through the team.

The team hadn't gone undercover in years.

"Undercover?" Morgan broke the silence, "This team hasn't gone undercover for years, Hotch and I are the one of the only ones who's gone undercover, but never as a team."

"Going undercover as a honeymooning couple could give us an advantage. It might put us right where the unsub is likely to strike." Emily responded

"It could help us observe the surroundings, identify any potential patterns or anomalies that we might miss from an investigative standpoint." Reid said, agreeing with Emily.

"This only calls for a couple since the unsub is targeting couples. We need two agents to pose as husband and wife." Strauss said

You sucked in a breath, the thought of going undercover sent shivers down your spine, you've done stimulations before, but the real thing? You push the feeling down as soon as it bubbles up.

You only joined a year ago surely they would want someone more experienced, someone who's shown themselves proved themselves to the team more.

But before your mind could fall deeper into your thoughts the sound of Hotch's name coming from Strauss stopped you. "Based on your experience and being Unit Chief the director wants you at the forefront of it." Hotch nodded, looking at the rest of the team.

"I would like to take Agent Prentiss since she has experience with Doyle-“

"Actually Agent, I believe it would be better if someone else went in with you."

And suddenly you were the only one in the room, a pair of uneasy green eyes met yours, Hotch raising his eyebrows ever so slightly.

And if you were crazy enough you would think he looked worried.

"With all due respect Ma'am I don't think she had enough field experience for this."

"I am concerned about that, however it has been brought to my attention that our unsub has a type and they all have a resemblance to-“

"To me" You finished for her. trying to sit up straighter and slow the beatings of your heart as you meet hotch's eyes. "If we can use my cover as bait, I would know what to say and how to be careful around him-"

Hotch looked over at you, calling out your name. "This is very risky, and dangerous not to mention doing a covert mission like this won't be easy."

“I understand Sir, but-"

“I don’t want any of my agents going in a bait, the profile isn’t complete yet. We don’t know what we’re looking for.” Hotch responded, eyes still boring into yours.

“Agent Hotchner we can’t wait until there are more victims, I’m sorry but it's the director's orders.” Strauss said, “We’ll send over the alias needed and with the information you have now it should be a simple task." And with that Strauss signed off, leaving only you and the team looking uneasy.

"This could work, Aaron,” Rossi said, sitting off to the side scribbling absentmindedly on his notepad. “While you two are undercover we can gather more pieces to the profile with your insight."

"Let's go over the victims, affluent couples honeymooning, madly in love, never leaving each other's sides."

You only caught snippets of the rest of the conversation. You were too busy wondering why for the first time Hotch was avoiding you, his eyes were glued to the board not sparing you a second glance.

#criminal minds #my writing #criminal minds x reader #aaron hotch fanfiction #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch hotchner #criminal minds fanfic #x yn #writing #no proofreading we die like men #fanfic

57 notes · View notes