#obviously it wasn't fun for greta

[bbybrahms]

My friend hates the kiss scene but it's so romantic to me he's so desperate and the way his hand nervously goes to the side of her face and the way he looks at her so wide-eyed I'm sobbing on the floor he's so touch-starved he just wants to kiss her so bad he doesn't even take the mask off it's so important to me ok you don't understand

#and ppl who try to make that scene more creepy/gross than it actually was: I Hate You #obviously it wasn't fun for greta #hence ✨the screwdriver✨ #but I just pity him so much I feel so bad for him #he just wants to kiss her ok #he's never- #he just- #he's not- #I'm just- #look #it's romantic to him and therefore it's romantic to me #the way he doesn't understand why his feelings for Greta would be one-sided HURTS ME SO BAD #HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND #I explained this in my doll post #but it just really gets me #the boy 2016 #brahms heelshire

[elisa20beth]

A Night to Remember

pairing: Jess McCready x Reader

warning: refrences to a fem presenting!reader, alcohol, smoking. Also written at 2am so that obviously requires a warning in itself Notes: your honor, I love her. Also I'm majorly late the A League of Their Own party so I highly doubted people will see this. Crossing my fingers for more Jess content S2, esp. Jess and Lu!!!

fluff, fluff, fluff

word count: 1.5k

summary: Reader decides to sneak out to a gay bar for the first time. Unfortunately Jess sees her and follows her there. Words are exchanged and they realize maybe nothing is impossible...

You press your ear against the door as you wait for the creaky floors to quiet down as Beverly brushes past your door. You look down at your watch; 10:00 at the mark. Ever since you almost got caught being out past curfew, you vowed to never do it again, making sure to always wait exactly 30 minutes post-curfew before stepping outside your room, Beverly’s snores posing as a quiet melody of reassurance. Right as you heard her door close, you pushed away from the door, striding over to your armoire, where your (f/c) dress was hanging in front. You start to slip out of your satin pajamas as you nervously glance over to the dress.

What if something goes wrong or what if someone finds out, your mind runs. 

You can't risk getting your secret out, not with your baseball future at risk. You finish buttoning up the dress as you turn around to face the mirror. You smooth out non-existent wrinkles as your eyes rake over your image. The small white scalloped collar stood stark from the dark buttons and belt but coordinated perfectly with the pleated skirt, ending just below your knees. 

Taking a deep breath, you move to sit on your bed, rolling your stockings up, pausing as you see your roommate move in her sleep. You slowly get up and move over to the small table at the end of the bed. Choosing a lipstick to match a perfect outfit. If you look good, then you’ll feel good, at least that's what your Ma always told you.

You pick up your handbag as you slowly twist open the metal doorknob. Sliding out into the dark hallway, you glide down the stairs, stepping into the non-squeaky areas of each step. You stop in front of the last obstacle; the loud front door. You hesitantly reach out for the ornate door knob and slowly twist it. Opening the door enough, you quietly slip out and speed up to a brisk walk out into the open world. But even through all your planned and careful actions, you fail to notice the figure leaning on the porch fence, smoking a cigarette. 

As you walk past the shed, you turn around to glance at the place you've called home for the last month. The home of the Rockford Peaches. Being a part of the team gave you a sense of confidence you didn’t have before, even though it wasn't as high as your teammates like Greta, Jo, or Jess. 

Jess. You didn’t know when it started. Was it when you heard her complain about screwing up at the try-outs that first night, or when you bonded over Beverly’s strict rules, or when you saw her ferocious mindset the first time you saw her? All you knew was that when you started to fall, you fell hard and fast. You had never felt like that before. Maybe the occasional pretty girl who caught your breath at school back home, but nothing like this. You couldn't let yourself live like this any longer, keeping it a secret for so long. You didn't know if you were doing this for her or yourself but you couldn't let yourself quit now. So you turned around, with a new sense of confidence as you marched towards the safe haven to figure out who you were.

…

Jess looked up to the sound of the front door softly closing, moving her eyes towards your figure, all dolled up. She’d always find a bit of fun in teasing you, enjoying how meek you would become as a result. Besides Carson’s late-night practices and the games, there wasn't much to do, causing her to get bored, a lot. 

As she watched you walk towards the shed, away from her eyesight, she put out her cigarette and started to follow you, curious about where you were going, past curfew may she add. Ten minutes in, she realized you were heading in the direction of the gay bar Lu and she frequented often. It didn't come as a shock to her; on multiple occasions, catching you staring at her, quickly turning away when you realized she’d seen. But a smile rose to her face as she realized it confirmed her suspicions. Maybe she'd actually have a chance.

Watching you stop, she quickly hid behind the car parked near the curb as she saw you close your eyes, breathing in deeply before you opened the door and escaped from her view. Walking back around the car, Jess made sure to take her time before making her presence known, allowing you to get comfortable before scaring you off. 

…

As you stepped inside the building, you felt a sense of safety and love rush over you as you started walking through the hallway, pieces of art adorning the walls. Approaching the main area, you felt your heartbeat quicken, worried if you would feel welcome. Yet that worry faded away as you took in the scene. Couples mingling at the bar and dancing the night away. Sounds of joy and love filled the room, joining the lively voice and signing into the mic. You make a beeline towards the bar and slide into an empty seat. 

“Welcome to the Moxie Salon, what can I get for you sweets?” The bartender asks as you look up.

“Umm,” you start, “Could I just get a beer?”

“Sure can! Say, I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before” He adds.

“This is my first time but I don't think it’ll be my last” You finish with a smile.

The bartender mirrors your expression as he turns back around. You look around at your surroundings, feeling a sense of serenity. 

“Hey, could you make that two beers?” a familiar voice adds. 

You freeze up as you feel someone slide into the empty seat next to you. You refused to look up as you felt their burning gaze.

“What brings you here (n/n)?”

You felt your cheeks burn as you slowly met Jess’s eyes, “I-” you started to sputter.

“Hey,” She reassures you, “Your secret is safe with me”, mockingly zipping her lips and throwing away the key.

“Besides,” she adds, “You’re not alone. You’re just like me- just like all of them”.

You give her a grateful smile as the two beers slid towards you. Both of you take a sip as you enjoyed each other's space quietly, Jess breaks the silence a few minutes later: “Am I the first one to figure it out?”

“I hope s-” you stop, “Wait, what do you mean figure it out? Was it obvious?”

Seeing your nervous expression, she lightly chuckles before adding: “Not really, just the many times I’ve caught you staring or how you react when I’m near you” she finishes, bumping your shoulder jokingly.

“I’m so sorry, it’s just that being away from home, it felt like a lot of things suddenly clicked”

“Don’t be sorry. Besides, I enjoyed it”, Jess teased you as she hopped off the seat and nodded towards an empty table.

You follow her lead, pulling out the wooden chair and sitting down. Jess lit a cigarette as you guys would spend the next hour talking, laughing, and enjoying each other's presence; a haven away from the strict rules that run society outside. As The night begins to slow down, people filtering out of the warmly-lit room, Jess stands from her chair, putting out the cigarette before holding her hand out to you, helping you stand up. 

“You ready to head out?”

“Yeah,” you mutter as you stare at each other, soft smiles gracing each face.

And yet as you weaved through the smaller crowd, never once did she let go, only moving to rest her arm around your shoulders once you stepped outside into the cool Chicagoan night breeze. Your feet fell into a similar pattern as you felt her warmth encase you like a warm blanket. Butterflies filled your stomach as you felt her grip tightening and loosen up on you periodically. 

As the house came into sight, you feel yourself deflate, not wanting to end the night. And as she led you up the stairs, she stopped in front of the door, turning to face you. She looks down as she grabs your other hand and looks back up to meet your eyes.

“I had a lot of fun tonight and I’m glad I got to finally meet the real you”

“Maybe we could do it again sometime?” you hopefully add.

Jess replies with a sweet kiss to your cheek, smirking as she sees your expression, “I’d love to”, turning back around to walk through the door;

You smile to yourself before following her, watching as she walks up the steps before disappearing into her and Greta’s shared room. You slowly make your way back to your room before slipping out of your dress and back into your pajamas and falling into your bed, passing out with dreams replaying the night over and over again; Jess’s plaited hair and the cigarette behind her ear seared in your brain till the morning and for many nights to come.

Maybe your dreams weren't impossible after all.

#jess mccready #jess mccready x reader #aloto #aloto 2022 #lupe garcia #gay love #this seriously needs to be properly edited #fluff #a league of their own #a league of the own series

[mariacallous]

people are idiots, clearly Greta Thunberg wasn't making fun of people with small dicks, she was taking aim at the fact that Andrew Tate's self image is totally dependent on having a big pee-pee that he can use good on womenz, her a skinny Swedish girl saying he had a tiny dick in public in a loud voice totally shattered his little mind.

That's what's driving me nuts like...obviously hashtag all dicks are valid but in this specific situation it's a very deliberate puncturing and mocking of his whole shtick and persona.

There are some situations where we just don't need to Be Like That and try to make sure we're being Particularly Correct, especially since he's a what, 30-something dude harassing a teenager?

Like let's keep some fucking perspective and focus, for fuck's sake.

[streamsofstardust]

post gretallica thoughts (this is gonna be long):

INK:

we got stuck in traffic so i only heard two songs but what i did hear was so fucking good

spencer's voice is incredible live. he's super talented and i can't wait to see him again in november for trinity of terror

i want spencer to hold a knife to my throat while he's covered in blood but we don't need to talk about that rn

GVF:

i know i said it before but holy FUCK daniel was banging the absolute shit out of those drums. shit had me weak at the knees

i was hoping they played tears of rain but alas. i get why they don't and honestly it's on me for that being my favorite song

jake was electrifying. his entire vibe on stage is just something i cannot fully put into words. seeing videos online isn't anywhere near the same as seeing it in person and i know i was far back but holy fuck

you can see clear as day how happy jake is when he's performing. he's a natural and i know he's gonna be a fucking legend

josh's hair is growing on me but i def think baby needs a trim and some curl defining cream. maybe danny can help him out

josh also doing those breathy grunts? jesus take the mf wheel

sammy is very very still. or at least he was tonight. id love to see him move around stage more. take up some space baby!!

BRING👏🏼 DANNY 👏🏼CLOSER 👏🏼TO 👏🏼THE 👏🏼FRONT👏🏼

the weight of dreams live is something else. it's a life changing experience. it's amazing

there was a cat walk type thing in front of the stage and i would've loved to see at least jake utilize it

greta van fleet is incredible. point blank period

METALLICA:

james hetfield needs to read me a bedtime story. man has the sexiest speaking voice holy shit

lars makes the cutest faces I'm so glad the camera caught them bc he's fucking adorable (also a fucking KILLER drummer)

kirk hammett is a fucking god. a fucking guitar god. man is absolutely unreal and the shit he did was just immaculate. also his guitar collection is so fire

they switched guitars/basses so many times and every single one was sick. kirk's ouija board one was my favorite of his. james' purple guitar was my favorite of his

moth into flame was fucking sick. just so fucking sick

seek & destroy was also killer

i really wanted to hear fuel, halo on fire, that was just your life, leper messiah, battery, and through the never. they didn't play any of those lmao but the set list was still pretty damn good

everyone was just waiting for master of puppets. there were several times i heard people chanting "master! master" but obviously it was the song they ended with and I'm glad they did

they played eddie's scene for master of puppets and it made me so fucking happy. i got a video of it thank fuck

PYROTECHNICS BAYBEEEEEE. insert "hi I'm josh and i like fire" because me the fuck too. literally in the nosebleeds and still felt the heat from the flames. it was so fucking cool

they had fireworks at the end too and it was super pretty. loved it

all in all gretallica was so much fun and even tho the drive up made my back hurt and i wasn't nearly as close to the stage as i usually am for concerts it was a wonderful experience

#gretallica #metallica #greta van fleet #ice nine kills

[cadyrocks]

Full disclosure: never played much with dolls of any kind.

One important criteria for the Barbie movie was "can this movie make me forget that this is a toy commercial". It kinda got there? I guess the crass commercialism of the first act was intentional, but it doesn't make it less crass when the way to get to the real world involves 6 different accessories that you can buy. For money.

Similarly, the gender politics were... Odd. A combination of baby's first feminism - filtered through the lens of a toy marketed to little girls, obviously - and some genuinely bizarre beliefs about men and patriarchy. Patriarchy is obviously awful, but every Barbie is just immediately on board with being giggly eye candy? Learning about the real world immediately turns Kens into stereotypical macho douchebags? (To quote one of the funnier lines in the movie, "It's like I woke up from a dream where I really cared about the Snyder Cut".) The resolution is similarly bizarre; in Barbieland, the solution to patriarchy is to distract the kens by making them jealous of each other, and then... Vote them out. Just some really weird shit. Like I said, it's baby's first feminism. Another character even calls this kind of capitalist feminism out in the film, in a scathing critique of Barbie that just gets dropped once it's inconvenient.

Not that it's all bad. The boardroom scene is excellent, with Will Farrell making a terrific misogynist who doesn't get that he's a misogynist. There are some extremely funny jokes, and Margot Robbie is an excellent Barbie. "Weird Barbie" was both an excellent character and a source of a lot of funny jokes, she was great all around.

But given the level of culture-consuming hype around this movie, even on the queer sex site... I guess I expected more. I don't blame the movie for that, but like... I'm riding along enjoying a silly plot and suddenly we cut to a sight gag involving accessories you can buy, shown like an ad splash page. I'm enjoying a heartfelt family moment, and then a character complains that her mom wouldn't buy her a new doll. As said, the commercialism was pretty crass.

The Barbie Movie is a fun, lighthearted, diverse 2-hour-long toy commercial. Maybe I would be less ill-disposed to it if I had seen it before they announced the Polly Pocket movie, or if the ads before the movie weren't for a sequel, a sequel, another superhero movie, and a movie that's gonna be a feature-length ad for a racing video game, but I honestly don't think I would recommend it. It wasn't for me. If you're less sick of advertising, you'd probably enjoy it more, but given that you can buy every character in the movie and their outfits, I'm going to credit Greta Gerwig for the world's most impressive ad, and call it a day.

#barbie

[elliepassmore]

After the Forest review

4/5 stars Recommended if you like: fantasy, retellings, magic, fairytale vibes, grown up fairytale characters

TW animal cruelty (ch 25)

I devoured this book fairly quickly and was pretty entertained by it. It's definitely a book you just read for fun, not one where I'd say there's too much of a plot, but if you go into it expecting that then I think it's enjoyable.

I really liked seeing a reimagining of Hansel and Gretel. I think I've only seen that a couple of times and most don't really focus on the aftermath of what happened (I believe one of the stories in the Grim anthology from 2012 does, but that's also modern YA). Both Greta and Hans are deeply impacted by what happened in the woods when they were children. Hans now has a drinking and gambling problem and seems to distrust most everybody, while Greta feels abandoned and faces the mistrust of the rest of the village for killing an 'old woman.'

That being said, something that I don't get is why Greta and Hans never just said the old woman was a witch? Like, Greta gets so much shit for throwing her into the fire and all of it could've easily been avoided by just saying the woman was a witch, which she was, and Greta saved their lives by burning her alive, which is how they kill witches in this world. Seems like Greta's life would've been far easier if they'd gone that route.

Despite their traumatic experience, Greta throws her heart into making the best gingerbread possible...with the help of the witch's magical book of course. Hans won't touch the stuff after their experience, but Greta doesn't seem bothered by it or the magical book. Honestly, she doesn't seem very bothered by magic at all, though she does largely avoid doing magic even when the book tempts her. Greta is pretty mild-mannered and friendly, and while she's taken aback by some of the things that occur over the course of the book, she tends to recover quickly and take it in stride.

Hans, on the other hand, is actually kind of awful. He reacts to perceived slights against him even when he is the one who is causing trouble, and is the kind of desperate that makes a man dangerous for most of the book. He does finally clean up his act in the second half of the book, but the first half makes me really dislike him and wish Greta would turn him out on his ear.

Mathias is a newcomer in the village, so obviously he and Greta hit it off immediately and are the main couple. Like Greta, Mathias takes most things in stride and isn't bothered by things like witches or strange goings-on. He's a fairly mysterious character and is in and out of the village a lot, so it's clear he has secrets. But he's also not the kind of character whose secrets seem particularly dangerous. I figured out his secret as soon as he was introduced, but then the secret when further than I thought it would and it just got....kind of weird.

Rob, Greta and Hans' 'uncle,' was also a major side character in the book. He was friends with their father and helped to take care of them after their father died. He's a protector at heart and definitely feels the need to do the right thing, though at times that is tempered by doing what will keep the most people he cares about safe.

Like a lot of other reviewers, I had a hard time connecting to the characters in the book. Greta just felt kind of distant to me for some reason that I can't put my finger on. I think part of it is because Greta often just watches things happen and doesn't exhibit agency in a lot of the more tense scenes. Even if she isn't someone big on magic or confrontation or anything like that, a deeper sense into her emotional agency I think would've helped make her easier to connect to.

Obviously there had to be some kind of plot in the book since it wasn't set up as a slice-of-life/cozy fantasy thing, but I didn't really like what was going on with the castle at the end. All the stuff with the castle and Fizcko and Liliane just felt very out of place to me and I wasn't a huge fan of the whole thing. I did like the threads of it that had been dropped throughout the book and think there were interesting alternatives that could've been done with them instead.

Overall I found this book to be pretty entertaining. It definitely has its weak spots though and I had a hard time connecting to some of the characters. I did like the various magics we were introduced to though.

#book #book review #books #book recommendations #fantasy #bookstagram #booklr #bookblr #bookaholic #bookish #after the forest #kell woods #fairytale #dark fairytale #special edition #hansel and gretel #retelling

[allamericansbitch]

Personally, I also agree that Margot's Barbie was not an Oscar-worthy performance, but Ryan's Ken was definitely less so. You would think, by the way people reacted to the movie, that it was Ken's journey, and it really, really wasn't. But I wouldn't say that it wasn't not feminist - the whole concept behind Barbie-land is that it's a subversion of our world, Ken struggles with the idea of being and appendage to Barbie because in our world, women are still often treated as an appendage to the men in their lives. Obviously, Ken's existential crisis was played for laughs, but I don't think that it was Greta's intent to simply put the shoe on the other foot for fun, or to downplay the female experience - she's using the character of a man to illustrate what it's like being an actual woman. The fact that this completely went over most people's heads and they think the point of the movie was "Men have deserve rights too <3" is extremely aggravating, but also not her fault (which is why she should have gotten a writing nom thank you and good night)

i definitely think the most shocking thing is greta getting so aggressively snubbed (for like the 3rd time now btw)

#answered #anonymous

[gsmattingly]

Review - White Noise

I watched "White Noise" directed by Noah Baumbach and written by Noah Baumbach and Don DeLillo. It stars Adam Driver as Jack and Greta Gerwig as Babette. Also Don Cheadle appears as Murray. There are many other people in this movie. Music is by Danny Elfman.. I enjoyed this film. It was odd. There was lots of fast talking and conversations weaving in, out and over other conversations. There is a definite theme concerning death, dying and false facts appearing out of nowhere. Jack is an expert on Hitler. and certainly makes some interesting speeches. This movie received very mixed reviews, some very bad reviews, and some few people who obviously liked it and were entertained. I was entertained. Peter Bradshaw at the Guardian gave it five stars. His review ends with "Jack and Babette’s bizarre lives – a knight’s-move away from reality – are too strange to be sympathised with, for all the Spielbergian family chatter in the kitchen. But they are there to be to marvelled at. It is such a fascinating, invigorating spectacle." Wendy Ide, also at the Guardian, gave it two stars. From her review, ". A closing-credits supermarket dance sequence is fresh and fun, but the rest of the picture is laboriously quirky and self-regarding." I guess you have to be either in the proper state of mind or just enjoy rather quirky movies.

The A&P supermarket dance scene through which the credits scrolled was very nice. I liked it.

#Youtube

[blushinggray]

beach date with himbo kirishima

i was watching a clip from one of greta titelman's standup specials and it was SO hilarious. i had to turn it into a scenario 😂😭 although this one with a bit of a happier ending

cw // fluff, comedy, first date mishaps, himbo kirishima, reader is kind of a player, implied sexual content

when you show up to a party, you've always got your eye out for the good candy. nice face, nice arms, nice pecs, nice butt, nice thighs, you know, the works. you're single and always ready to take advantage of it.

and holy shit, did you find the biggest, shiniest piece of red eye candy tonight. apparently he's a friend of mina's from way back in junior high, and she introduced you to him with that classic wiggle in her brow. and while you don't make a habit of fucking your friends' friends, this guy was hot. smoking hot.

he was tall, handsome, ripped, he had a loud red dye job in his spiked up hair. his style was a little dorky but fuck his hands were fucking huge. you were already compiling a list of things you'd want him to do with those hands before you were even told his name.

so clearly you got to talking, and flirting, and laughing at all of this kirishima guy's jokes, and lying about your personality so that he'd stay interested in you long enough for you to give his dick a test ride. because now that you've met him, you just gotta know what his dick looks like.

he, however, seemed to have others plans because he was suddenly asking you, "do you wanna go surfing?"

you were a little caught off guard, but obviously you answered, "yeah, i love surfing. i'd love to go."

after you got his number and settled on a date with him, he got caught up with some other old friends, so you figured that was it for the night.

when mina caught you later that evening, she asked you, "soooo... how'd things go with kirishima?"

you gave her a deadpan look, "i gotta go surfing with him."

"you're going surfing with him? that sounds so fun!"

"mina! does it look like i know the first thing about surfing?!" you shouted.

"it's okay, he can probably teach you." she shrugged.

"mina, i'm not trying to learn a new hobby. i just wanted to sleep with your hot friend and then get on with my life."

"what? but kirishima is so sweet! i introduced you to him because i thought maybe you'd be good together." she pouted.

you groaned, "i should've known. you're always trying to get me cuffed to some 'decent' guy."

"because you deserve one!" she argued, "don't you get tired of fucking all these lame strangers?"

"if they're not good lays, they at least make good stories. let me be a slut while i'm still good at it." you sighed.

she didn't argue with you about it for much longer after that, but she wished you a good time with kirishima on your surfing date.

and when the day came, and kirishima came rolling up to your street in his pickup truck, you thought all might not be lost. that truck was as red as his hair, and it was a stick shift but the console wasn't directly in the middle of the two seats, so there would be plenty of room to... play around later.

though in all honesty, if no one was around, you would be perfectly happy to get fucked in the back of the truck bed too. he'd have to find a place to put the surfboards aside somewhere though.

it was so hot watching him manually drive the truck all the way to the beach. he switched between the brakes and the clutch so smoothly that you swore you could feel yourself already soaking up his leather seats.

"so i brought like three different boards with me. which one do you wanna ride?" he asked you at some point.

and you gave him your most sultry look with a tilt of your head, saying, "mmm... something long, and hard... that i can ride all day..."

unfortunately, kirishima did not seem to pick up on what you were really suggesting, because he responded with a casual, "yeah, i got one of those. it's pretty sturdy."

".... awesome."

that's right, there was still the issue of actually surfing to overcome, so you would have to come up with something to distract him into doing something... not water logging instead.

so when he parked at the lot by the shore, you looked out the window and put on your most believable act, sucking in a breath like, "man... i don't think it's a good idea to surf today."

"what? why not?" he asked.

"the... conditions." you waved a hand out at the ocean, "it looks too rough out there to surf. at least for a beginner, like me."

"oh..." kirishima followed your gaze out to the waves crashing at the shore and shrugged, "yeah, i guess you're right. but it's okay, we don't have to go surfing. it's still a nice day! we can still enjoy ourselves."

and before you could protest or suggest something that would be much more fun to do inside a private space, he was jumping out of the truck and heading down to the beach.

wow. there went your chance to let him watch you strut down the beach and whip your hair out of your face like in one of those lifeguard movies...

you were following him with the intention to find a nice spot to settle down, maybe tan a bit, charm him through a few beers, and then he'd bring you back to his truck to smash.

but without warning, he just yanked off his shirt -- revealing the most majestic back of muscles you have ever seen -- threw it to the ground with his sandals that he kicked off, then ran headfirst into the ocean, shouting like a free goddamn spirit...

and there went your chance to slowly unveil your flimsy excuse of a swimsuit and ask him to rub you up with his big, strong hands-- sunscreen. to rub you with sunscreen.

you sighed and just dropped your stuff down at the spot where he left his shirt and sandals. just when you were about to dig into your bag for a blanket to lay out, kirishima was shouting, "hey!!"

then you looked up and saw him waving his arms for you to join him in the sea... "come on!!" he shouted with a big, toothy grin.

with another sigh, you shook your head with a smile as you slowly disrobed yourself of your clothes to reveal the skimpy two piece set you had on. and then you made a show of bending over to stuff your clothes back into your bag before standing up to walk towards him.

aaand of course he wasn't even paying attention to you anymore. he was off running further into the ocean. he was already at a sea level where he could do the fucking butterfly stroke...

"mina, why..." you looked up into the sky to reflect on all the things you would do for dick. this was definitely not what you expected.

finally, you got to the water and it's immediately lapping at your ankles. the weather was actually pretty cloudy today so there was no warm sun to offset the freezing ocean water, so your teeth were chattering the second you made contact.

and that's when kirishima decided to look at you, when you were starting to shiver and curl in on yourself from the icy water licking at your skin. fantastic.

but his sharky grin and that beefy arm that beckoned you further into the ocean like a goddamn redheaded siren at least made you chuckle. or maybe more like a dog on a special day out.

you took a step at a time, slowly letting your body get acclimated to the water temperature, when out of nowhere, a huge wave knocked you to the side. you tripped and fell to your hands and knees, only for another waves to wash over you completely now and soak you completely from head to toe.

standing from the water and coughing out the salt in your throat, you tried to get ahold of yourself but you could hear kirishima laughing from several meters away. you wanted to believe that it's not at you and how you probably looked like a sewer rat right now, but he was clearly looking at you as he shouted, "are you okay?"

"great...!" you shouted back half-heartedly.

you wanted to say that the day got better from there, but honestly... nothing was going your way. instead of jumping into his arms and letting him swing you around in the water with his big, strong biceps, he just kept splashing at you and swimming away like it was a game of fucking tag.

when you finally got a break from the water, instead of resting in the sand with some ice creams or beers, he elected to play fucking frisbee. which you really just ran and chased after more than you actually "played" for the better part of half an hour.

and right when you thought he was gonna sit down and relax, he got caught up in a sandcastle building project with some kids... you would've joined in, but they were talking about some nerdy spaceship stuff from a sci-fi video game or something so you just decided to sit this one out on your blanket, apply your own goddamn sunscreen, and down an entire beer without coming up for breath.

at this point, you were no longer horny enough to even think about fucking this guy anymore. it was clear that he was the most active guy ever, and you would need an outstanding amount of energy to keep up with him. you had hoped that it would turn out that way in a situation with your clothes off, but alas, you no longer felt sexy enough in this drenched swimsuit that was clearly only meant for show and not actually swimming...

and once kirishima walked back up to you with a sand crab in each hand, you thought you could've fainted when he told you to hold one. "come on, he won't hurt you." he insisted.

but when a crack of thunder suddenly snapped the air and jolted kirishima enough for him to lose his grip on the small crab, the tiny crustacean fell right onto your bare chest and you shrieked like you got bitten by something.

after standing frantically and swatting it off of your skin and coming out with a couple of tiny scratches for the little claws, you looked up to see kirishima laughing with amusement, telling you that it was fine. "i mean it when i said it wouldn't hurt you."

but you were done.

"yeah, i think i'm gonna go." you said, fishing out your top and skirt from your bag.

"go? already?" kirishima's eyes widened, and he looked like a puppy who was told that he had to leave the park. as much as you hated to see it, and as sweet of a guy that he is, this is far beyond what you expected for today. "why?"

"did you not hear the thunder just now, kirishima?" you asked him, pulling your top over your wet swimsuit before reaching underneath it to pull at the strings that would loosen your bikini. "it's probably going to start raining."

you pulled out the wet swim piece, but the lingering cold still left your nipples hard underneath your shirt. which kirishima's eyes notice before he turns away with a slight blush on his cheeks.

oh, so now he decides to notice your body.

"and as nice as this has been," you grunted as you pulled your skirt over your waist, and reached under to pull your swim bottoms off. you didn't actually bring underwear with you today since you hadn't really counted on needing it... but that was on you, so you would have to deal with the repercussions, "i'm tired, i'm cold, i feel gross. and as hot as you are, i really do not see this going anywhere if you haven't been picking up all the 'fuck me' signals i have been sending you all day."

"'f-f-fuck me' signals?" he flustered, "i thought we were having a good time. i mean, n-not that i don't think you're not pretty, or like, fuckable, or-- i mean, that's not the right word. i mean, i just thought we were gonna get to know ea--"

he's interrupted by another clap of thunder, this time much angrier than the first. you almost feel like you can smell the ozone in the air. and like the perfect cherry to your sundae of a day, the rain starts coming down. right after you changed into your only set of dry clothes.

"fuck..." you closed your eyes with a defeated sigh. it was just not your day... must as well pack it in.

but just as you picked up your quickly dampening bag to head back to the parking lot, kirishima grabbed your hand and swung you back around. "wait." he said.

"what, kirishima?" you retorted with the same defeat.

"just wait. come on," he took your bag handles and dropped it back to the ground. "just... forget about everything for a minute. just stand here with me. and just, you know, feel... the rain with me."

the rain was coming down harder now. you were more than feeling it... it was practically pounding at you.

"are you serious right now?"

"come on, just close your eyes." he smiled at you. and despite the loud downpour and his face dripping with rainwater, you couldn't just break those puppy dog eyes.

so with a sigh, you closed your eyes, and let him hold your hand as the wind and rain pelted at your skin. it was still cold enough to have you shivering, but somehow... kirishima's warm body got closer to yours, and it wasn't so unbearable.

"it's just you, and me, and the elements out here. it's kinda romantic, don't you think?" his voice was incredibly close to your face now, you could tell even with your eyes closed.

by now, you knew that this guy was an idiot. you meant that in the sweetest of ways. but in a way, he's kind of poetic too. a dumb way, but it still counts. so you gave him a laugh.

"kirishima, what are you even trying to--"

you were cut off by a pair of big, warm hands cupping your face to hold you as he gave you a long, rain-soaked kiss. you only opened your eyes again when he pulled away, and you came headfirst into the deepest red you had ever seen.

and you already knew he had a nice face, and a cute smile, and a killer body. but how had you not noticed he had some of the prettiest eyes?

"i--"

he interrupted you with another sweet, long kiss. and this time, it was long enough for you to wrap yourself around him. even though the rain was still tearing at your skin and you knew that every inch of you was soaked through, this was the first time today that you couldn't bring yourself to mind.

because it was just you and him. and the elements.

when he pulled away this time, he took your hand in his, picking up your stuff with his other, and said, "okay, let's go home."

and this time, you smiled back, "finally."

***

the next morning, you walked out of kirishima's bedroom wearing only one of his t-shirts because all your clothes were still wet and you were too busy last night to remember to put them out to dry.

"hey, morning!" kirishima greeted you from the kitchenette of the apartment, "you want coffee?"

"yeah..." you murmured against his back as you hugged him from behind. you didn't let go until he had a mug prepared for you, which you happily thanked him for with a kiss before walking off in search of your phone.

when you find it, you skim through all the notifications until you find your messages from mina, who texted:

well?? how'd surfing go?? is kirishima perfect for you or not??

you chuckled as you reflected on yesterday's events before sipping at your coffee, then you coughed as you almost spit out whatever you had just put in your mouth.

"kirishima, what is this?!" you yelled at him.

"hm? oh! it's one of those protein powder type creamers that you can put in coffee. i know the taste is a lil different but it's pretty good for you!"

"ugh..." you groaned and set your mug down to reply to mina:

he's so hot but also kinda weird...

from: mina

but....?

to: mina

but... i guess i'll keep him around for a bit

from: mina

i knew it! i knew was perfect for you!!!

he's not the brightest of the bunch but he is super down to earth. which you kinda need... no offense

to: mina

how do you know i'm not just keeping him around for his massive schlong

from: mina

because it's kirishima. i just know ;) he's more than his schlong

if anyone could hold you down, it's that guy

you looked over to where you could see kirishima dramatically flipping pancakes, and then one of them almost lands on his head...

yeah. you could tell he was real promising.

- fin -

#kirishima eijirou x reader #bnha x reader #drabble #no beta #i wanted to get a lil more done on my main baku wip today but this clip was just way too hilarious i had to use it #god bless funny inspiring anecdotes #also this is laughably longer than a drabble yes i know but the hilarity is necessary #mine #will perhaps come back to beta read later

[munsonenthisiast]

Then & Forever

A/N: I wrote this in like five days and had my bestie edit. This is my first time writing anything, but I love Josh so-

Summary: Since you started working for GVF, you and Josh had grown close to each other over the years. This time you hope your feelings don't get in the way of ruining everything you built.

Contains: Smut, drinking, smoking, cursing

WC: 10.9k

"So you're saying that. . . you've never played an instrument before?" Sam pointed at his bass. You laughed at the question, sipping your beer. "Correct." Sam furrowed his face in confusion. "Then why do you have a degree IN music if you can't play?" Josh hit Sam on the shoulder with a pencil making a small face. You shrugged your shoulders, swishing the alcohol around your mouth. "I don't know, It's just something I've never wanted to do, you know. I guess it's one thing knowing about an instrument rather than playing it."

Everyone nodded in agreement. "Well, if you did play anything I'm sure you'd be really good at it." Josh smiled towards you. He went back to writing in his journal while everyone else went back to respectively playing their own instruments.

But for you, it seemed a long way home. Never did it cross your mind that you would basically be living with four different people from time to time. Especially not so quickly. Greta Van Fleet was your first job, and really, first anything. From high school until now, you were alone. Which made you a little grumpy when working with people, but none the less you warmed up to them quickly. Especially Josh, who always seemed attached to the hip with you.

Josh may have annoyed you a tiny bit at first, but his euphoric mind is what intrigued you in the first place. He always seemed so wise, knowing the right answer to everything. And the way he wrote the lyrics to songs, just naturally appeared to him somehow. It was truly magic.

Jake smacked you on the arm, calling for your attention. "Ok, what do you think of this." He pulled the guitar over his lap, playing the notes he came up with. You quickly wrote down the notes he played, looking out for any correction. "So what do you think?" He asked, flailing his arms around. Running your pencil down the piece of paper, you started to shake your head. "I think it sounds pretty good," you said looking at Josh, who also nodded his head in compliance. "What would also sound cool is if you gave it a little vibrato during a live show."

Jake smiled writing the commentary down on a sticky note. "You know, for not knowing how to play, you really are smart with this kind of stuff." You glared your eyes at him, snickering just a little bit. Everyone worked for a couple of more hours, before calling it a night. Danny and Sam were practically sleeping on each other.

You shook Sam awake, snatching his car keys from his hand. "We'll both be dead if you drive, and were the most important in the band. Well, besides Danny. And Jake. And Josh." You twirled the keys around your finger while Sam stretched to get awake. Josh flipped all the pages over in his journal, turning to you. "We got pretty far today, don't you think?" Josh smiled at his brothers, who were already arguing about something. "Yeah. Maybe we'll get better stuff done tomorrow, you know. This is supposed to be the 'fun' part," you said using air quotations, "but the most boring part out of everything. But maybe, in the end, it'll all be worth it." you hit Josh's arm softly.

"Are you going with Sam?" you nodded quickly. "Yeah, I kind of promised him I would help him with some stuff in the morning." Josh looked sadder than ever. You smiled at Josh, noticing Sam waiting by the door with Jake and Danny. "I'll see you later." You gave Josh a quick kiss on the head.

"Let's go." you wiggled a finger at Sam, practically dragging him to the car. The ride to Sam's house was fairly quiet other than the little snores coming from him. It was nice to get a moment or two of peace to yourself. Working and living with four grown men gave no room for privacy. Everything is shared between you all. Which you had to admit, scared you a little at first because you've always grown up with a sister and maybe a few girlfriends here and there; but you were never as close to them, then as you were to the band.

The house was quiet when you walked in, dark and dim from the night sky. Sam immediately walked to his bedroom, and passed out on his bed. Which left you alone in the kitchen. Putting some of the items away in cabinets, you looked around at all the brothers' family photos, including some of Danny. It made you smile to yourself to see some of them so young and happy. Maybe a little vulnerable too. You were a little envious of how confident some of them had been with their work, just being able to put themselves out there, accepting failure. Not you though. Failure made you angry, furious even. Sometimes it got so bad, you'd hide away for days without any contact with the outside world.

After putting all the trash away, you headed back to the spare room. You turned on all the lights, changing into some warmer clothing. Crawling under the sheets, sleep came easy that night.

-

When you woke up, the blinds had been left the night before causing you to shoot out of bed. Quickly rubbing your eyes, you went to the bathroom to clean up a bit. When you walked towards the kitchen, your feet padded beneath you. Sam still wasn't up, which was pretty normal. You started some coffee and cooked breakfast for the two of you. Though, something triggered you to open a forbidden drawer and bum a cigarette. Quickly lighting it, you messed around with food until it was cooked.

"A cigarette at 8 in the morning?" Sam questioned groggily, clad in just sweatpants. "Well, you know me; I only smoke when I'm forgetting something." You both said in unison. You quickly waved him off, pouring food onto a plate for both of you. "I wonder WHO you're forgetting." You scrunched your face, looking around the room. "What do you mean who?" Sam scoffed. "Josh," You quickly rolled your eyes, slamming the plate down on the table "Eat the fucking food you loser." You both contently ate in peace while making some playful banter here and there. "So what exactly do you need help with?" Sam pulled out a cigarette from the cartridge, silently lighting.

"I need help with a decision." Sam stared at you while you nodded your in question, pretending like you at least understood what he was talking about. "Look, I just want you to go with me to buy another bass, ok. And I want to go to the record store." Narrowing your eyes, you pulled the cigarette from him. "I feel like this is something completely different than what you're telling me." Sam shook his head slowly. "Nope. I still want to keep the mint-colored bass, but I just want to have a cool collection, you know. Oh, let's buy something expensive!" He pointed the smoke at you, while you collected the dishes to put in the sink. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves, please. We can not go broke. Not like last time." You shuddered at the thought.

"Thanks for the food. I'm gonna get ready." You flinched your eyebrows and kept washing the dishes, putting them in the dishwasher. You quickly went back to the room for a change of clothes. By the time you were done, Sam was waiting at the door for you. Grabbing your coat and your shoes, you both headed out the door. Sam was walking coolly beside you, as you both looked around the town. Shops were lining down the small street, with cars passing through. He put his arm around your shoulder as you both passed through large crowds. Finally finding the music shop, you both walked in, heading to a certain section.

"So remind me," He paused to look at a sleek grey bass, flipping it over a couple of times. "Why don't you ever get with Josh? I mean he obviously likes you." You scoffed a little bit at his statement. "I thought we were here for you Sam, not to talk about me." You picked up a dark wood bass, showing it to Sam. "I mean with that same logic why don't I ever get with you? I mean we're close, right?" He rolled his eyes, still playing with the instrument you showed him.

"I think I like this one." Sam brought it up to the counter, talking to the girl up front. Who seemed to really enjoy the conversation they were having. Turning on your heel, you waited by the door playing with some random drum sticks. Sam eventually walked over and led you out. "It'll be delivered in a couple of weeks. I bought a whole new one." You pursed your lips smiling at Sam. "Did you also manage to snag that poor girl's number?"

Sam pushed you upside the head as you walked into the record store. You both parted ways looking at different sections. You flipped through vintage albums, picking out random ones you thought everyone would enjoy. After looking through some more, Sam found you and walked to the front to pay. "You found quite a lot there," Sam said, peeking through the ones in your hand.

"Yeah, figured I could add a bit to my very depressing collection." you chuckled, looking at one of the sleek covers. "Don't you have like two?" you glared back at Sam. "Which I believe are both of your band's albums." Sam laughed. You both paid, bags in hand.

"So what now?" you asked Sam as you both mindlessly walked around. "Probably go home. Want me to take you back?" You nodded in agreement and headed back to his car.

-

After saying goodbye to Sam, you walked back up the stairs to your apartment. When you opened the door, Josh appeared from your room, causing you to nearly break the table in the hallway.

"What the hell Josh!" He shrugged his shoulders, making his way to the couch. "What are you doing here?"

"I was waiting until you got back from hanging out with my brother. What were you two doing anyway?" Pouring a glass of water from the sink, you took a sip, and made your way to the couch next to Josh. You leaned your head back on the cushion, staring at the ceiling. "Sam bought a pretty hefty bass, and bought more records." You looked over at Josh. "What about you?"

"Well you know," he sighed. "Tried to work on writing up some new lyrics. Even went over to Danny's and Jake's to work some stuff out. It's coming along nicely." Setting the cup down on the coffee table, you looped an arm around Josh's, leaning your head on his shoulder. "Good. It'll come out beautifully in the end," you said patting his hand. You sniffed, sitting up in your seat. "Are you staying for dinner?" Josh hummed looking up at you. "Oh yeah. I was actually wondering if I could stay for the night; get's kind of lonely at my place." You nodded.

"Yeah, that's fine." You walked over to the kitchen. "Anything in mind you want to eat?" you asked. "Uh, how about that chicken. The one you make with the rice, mushrooms, and asparagus." You started to pull out the pots and pans, placing them on the stove. You leaned back on the counter watching everything cook. To be quite frank, you didn't know how you would handle Josh staying over. Of course, you and Josh were rather close, it even shocked people that you knew each other so well. After all, he knew you better than your own blood.

Maybe it wasn't such a bad thing. On one hand, it would give you time to think some things over and ponder the questions Sam had asked you earlier today. And then you could for sure decide what you wanted to do. You grabbed some plates and moved the food over to the table. Josh was already seated, patiently awaiting your arrival.

"Looks good, as always." he complimented, raising his hands towards you. "Thanks, Josh." you smiled.

"So," he said, chewing his food. "What happened at the music store?" Rolling your eyes at the thought of Sam annoying you, you told him about how he was flirting with the girl at the front desk. "I mean just giggling, and laughing, it was like watching teenagers make out." You made a small coughing noise thinking about Sam flirting with that poor girl. "But, you know, as they say, there's someone for everyone," you said sarcastically, shaking your head. Josh let out a high-pitched laugh at Sam. "That's Sam for you. He bore you with anything else?"

You thought about all the moments were Sam had bullied you over liking Josh or falling in love with Josh. Of course, you loved Josh but you weren't sure whether you were 'in love' with him per se. He was practically your other half. Nobody else could compare to that. But it was hard to decipher whether you even liked him like that. "You know. The usual; stuff about when you all were younger and more embarrassing moments."

Josh covered his face with his hands, groaning. "I hope it wasn't all too bad." He shook his head, eating the last bits of food. "Not at all, actually." As you both finished your plates, you sat in comfortable silence. That was until Josh spoke out about something.

"Hey remember that time- ugh geez, when was it," he asked, pressing on his face. "Probably around the time I first met you, and I pretty much knew then you hated my fucking guts, man" You let out a breath at the thought of Josh thinking you hated him. "But that was also the time I kept catching you listening to the album at the time. Just over and over and over again." Josh just shook his head thinking of you. "I didn't- hate you," you confessed. "I just really didn't know how to be around people so much. I did like that album though." you laughed, pointing at Josh. Who also laughed along with you. "Look, I'm sorry I made you feel that way; I just, I've never really had close friends like you." Before he could say anything back, you picked up the plates, placing them in the sink.

From inside the kitchen, you could hear him talking to his brothers on the phone. The usual screaming, laughing, and anger from whatever stupid joke someone told. It honestly made you wish you were closer to your own sister. Whom you haven't spoken to in the past ten years. After you finished off with the dishes, you walked to your bedroom. Which was hard to admit, but you had an entire wall full of Greta Van Fleet photos from when you first started working with them because you had a hard time telling who was who.

"Oh, I remember these photos!" Josh exclaimed as walked into your room. He marveled at all the photos you had printed out and plastered on the wall. Some even had labels of all the boy's names. "Yeah, a little creepy, don't you think?"

Josh shrugged. "I'll give you the benefit of the doubt because you didn't know who we were, and I know some people have a hard time differentiating between us twins." You turned around and opened up the bag full of record vinyl, handing some to Josh. "Here, I bought some for you earlier, and I figured I could use some- given the only two I have are from your band." He giggled, flipping through the different albums. "Oh, Bob Dylan! What a legend and old Michael Jackson! Very good stuff." You patted his shoulder as you put away all the other albums on a shelf.

"So, the spare bedroom should be good-" Josh cut you off. "I was hoping to sleep with you, actually. Unless that makes you too uncomfortable." You nearly choked on your own spit when Josh asked you that. You really didn't think he'd be that lonely. "Um, no that's fine. I'm sure I have someone's clothes here you can use." He grinned.

"Thanks." You handed him some spare clothes and left him to change in the bathroom. When you returned he was already tucked in, facing the wall with the pictures. Turning off the light, you quietly slid in next to him. You'd never really been in this much of an intimate situation, no less next to Josh. It wasn't awkward, but it was just hard to decipher the feelings of the both of you, and where he was going with his suggestion. "Can I ask you something?" Josh whispered. He turned around to face you closer.

"What was your initial thought when you first met me?" You laughed a little to yourself. "When I first met you I wanted to be exactly like you." Josh propped himself up on his elbow, leaning even closer to you.

"What about me?" he asked. "I don't know. You were always so confident, and the way you carried yourself; just, it made me so mad and angry that I couldn't be like that. Maybe that's why it came off that I hated you a little bit." Josh laid back down.

"Listen, you'll always be the best thing that happened to me. When I first met you, I thought you had the most brilliant mind out of everyone I ever met. Except for Danny. He's got an excellent brain." You smacked his arm laughing out loud.

"Thank you, Josh." You rolled over onto your side, hoping to fall asleep soon. Before you did though, you felt Josh slip an arm around your side; his face falling into the back of your neck. Soon, both of you fell asleep together.

-

When morning came the next day, Josh was still entangled in your back, but this time his arm was hugging you tighter. At any slight movement, he just pulled you closer. Finally giving up from moving away from Josh, you laid there silently in his arms. You silently traced the creases in his hand, thinking absentmindedly. He stirred a tiny bit but never woke. You took this time to turn around and look at him. His arm still wrapped around tightly on your shoulder; causing you to bury your face into his chest.

Inhaling his warm scent, you just about closed your eyes imagining a world where you were in love with him, and he loved you back. At this moment, he started to finally wake up. You decided to keep your eyes closed, too embarrassed to see what his reaction would be to find you both like this. You could feel Josh's eyes looking around the room before they made their way down to you. Feeling the certainty of him staring down at you made you panic a little. But then you could feel his hand start to part through your hair, moving it out of your face. His movement followed by leaning forward, giving you a long slow kiss on the forehead.

Then there was the fine sensation of his lips lingering on your skin. He started whispering your name, shaking you awake. You slowly blinked your eyes to make it look like you hadn't really been awake all this time. He smiled brightly when you both made eye contact. "Good morning," he said softly. You smiled, placing a hand on his chest. "Good morning Josh."

Letting out a little yawn, you turned over and sat up on the side of the bed. You sipped on some water that had been on you bedside for a while, then stretched out. "What do you plan on doing today?" you asked groggily. "Everyone wanted to meet up today and go over some stuff. Wanna join?" you quickly nodded your head.

"Great. Well then, I'll go take a shower and get ready." He walked away silently, leaving you all alone once more. Deciding against the better of things, you too got up to shower. While waiting for the water to heat up, you traced against the spots where Josh's hand had been.

It's like there was a space left on you, but you could only feel the invisible touch leftover from him. Jumping in the shower felt like you were committing a terrible sin. The handprint of Josh washed away as every drop of water hit your body. But it felt just as warm and comforting as him. After quickly getting dressed, you met Josh at the front door who was holding it open for you. The crisp autumn air surprised you in the face when you walked outside. The sidewalks weren't too busy but crowded to perfection

You both got in the car and drove to the studio. Everyone was already there by the time you two made it; For some reason, Josh had wanted to stop to get everyone coffee and a bagel, which you really couldn't say no to. Sam raised his eyebrows at you when you walked in with Josh pretty late. You hit him on the arm lightly. Sam rubbed the part of his arm, cursing you off. Everyone, including you, walked into a backroom set with all the instruments anyone could think of, and two very well-loved on couches.

The lights in the room were set to a dim, vintage-style brown, illuminating everyone's tan features. Josh handed the food out, starting the conversation. It varied from topic to topic.

"How is everyone?"

"Are there new ideas anyone wants to talk about?"

"How about we do this instead of that."

Josh snapped his fingers in front of your face, waving his hand around. "Hey silly, I asked you a question." you looked up quickly, meeting everyone's gaze. "Huh?"

"I said do you have any ideas on what we should wear?" You pulled out a small sketchbook from your jacket pocket showing Josh, and the rest of the band on the different aesthetics for clothing. "I was thinking about stitching some nudity art on the back for Josh. I'll probably go shopping for some silk and thread. I found this really cool jacket piece for Jake; I'll add some things on it, and a shiny blazer for Sam. As for Danny, I found these really nice pants, but I have to tailor them. I'm still trying to find a smooth shirt to go with."

You wrote down some reminder notes giving the rest some time to process anything and get started. Josh sat next to you on one of the couches, pulling out his note journal. He pointed out some of the lyrics, whispering to himself before showing it to you. "I came up with these this morning." your cheeks turned red, though you doubt Josh could see given how dark it was. You read through the lines in each glorious manner. They each had a delicate touch to them, written with something personal

It reminded you of something ethereal. Like being in outer space, and getting to look at all the planets from afar. "What are you thinking?" Josh asked. You let out a short breath before answering. "I think it's good. Really good in fact. I can feel it's personal to you, you know."

Before he could respond, there was a line of curses causing you both to look up. Jake was yelling at himself and the guitar in his hands with a tiny string poking out from the neck of the guitar.

"This fucking piece of shit keeps breaking," he he groaned, with gritted teeth. Rolling your eyes, you went to the other grabbing some new guitar strings. Handing them back Jake, he mumbled out a thank you. "Guess what, it's not that hard to get up and get new strings, Jake. I just did it by myself." Everyone laughed at your taunting to Jake, getting rid of his frustrated mood.

"Well, you're the best." He poked your shoulder. You headed back to another room to think about some more things. Possibly about Josh; but the majority for the band. Really working with them, never gave you time to put yourself out there. Which wasn't a terrible thing. In fact, you preferred not to out. You've always had a one-track mind. Focused too much on one thing, forgetting completely about anything else. It's probably why you'd failed out of most schools during your high school and college career. It always ended up being too much for your brain to handle.

Maybe that's what you feared most. Things always getting in the way; either making you angry, or angry enough to run away and never look back. You didn't want that with Josh. Nor did you want that for this band. You made some more scratch notes, listening to the muffled sound of music. After a while, you doodled in your notebook for some clothing ideas. Stitching had been one of the many skills that stuck with you since when. You never really knew where you learned to do such a thing.

Josh always told you how marvelous your work was. That it belonged in a museum of some sort. He knew somehow that you'd do great things with art. When sketching became boring, you shopped around online for some fabric, and thread, ordering what you needed. When finished some smaller portions of work, you fell back on the couch pushing your hair out of your face. Josh walked in at the right time, pulling you back into the studio.

"We hashed some things out, figured what don't and do want for some of the songs. Think we'll be ready to record in a few weeks." All the boys cheered each other on, pushing each other around. "I think this calls for a celebration over some drinks."

"Great idea. There's a bar a couple of blocks from here. What do you say?" Everyone hummed in agreement, piling out the door. Josh had a hand on your back as he walked you out through all the doors.

-

When you walked inside there were a few people seated around. It wasn't overbearing crazy. Everyone took a seat at the bar ordering drinks. You had already taken a couple of tequila shots to loosen up for the night. "So tell me," Josh slouched down in his seat. "What do you think the future holds for this band." You giggled, already a little drunk.

"What I think doesn't matter Josh. I think that you'll be successful in whatever you choose to do. I think it's you as the leader to help everyone along. In my opinion, they're here to support you and your ideas. I mean, of course, they have their own input but you get what I'm saying." Josh nodded along, sipping his drink. "That's quite a mouthful, but yeah. I'd do anything for these people. For Christ's sake, three of them are my brothers. And Danny I've known for like ever." He pointed to them, which they were all fighting about something.

Josh shook his head, looking down at the floor. He placed a hand on your shoulder as he left for another drink. Sam soon replaced Josh, slouching in the same position. "What were you two talking about." He waved a finger around your face. To which, you quickly swatted away. "He loves you, Sam. We love you. I love you, Sam."

Sam pursed his lips, squinting his eyes. "You're that drunk already?" You hummed looking at your watch seeing as only twenty minutes had passed. "Well Sam, the night's still young, so I'm willing to get fucking wasted if you are." He quickly nodded his head, ordering the two of you more drinks. As the night went on, all of you managed to play twelve rounds of pool (none of which you won), a game of cards, and meet totally random people. You, including the boys, were completely wasted and it wasn't even one in the morning. Danny and Jake had left to go god knows where, leaving you, Sam, and Josh talking to some random girl at a table. Looking over at Josh, you felt your heart hurt a little.

Sometimes you wish you had the assertiveness that Josh had to talk to him. Deep down you knew he would never reject you. He would randomly bring up why you never got together, but you always dismissed the conversation too scared of what might happen. Sam slipped next to you, turning his chair around to face you. He followed your line of sight, his eyes landing on Josh laughing with the same girl who's been here for hours.

"Look, if it pisses you off that much, talk to him later. It's not like he's gonna hate you for the rest of his life. He practically loves you to death." You shook your head, taking another drink of your beer. "I'm just- I'm not mad- I'll just never be able to be that person who can just randomly walk up to a person and fall 'in love' with them." You cried. Every time you think about it, you just want to go to bed and hide. "But how come I never end up with people like you or Jake or even sweet people like Danny. Why does it have to be Josh?"

Sam sat up in his chair, turning it back around to face the bar. "Why don't you try it. Maybe you fighting inside that big head of yours really doesn't like Josh after all." Sam said as he cradled your face, shaking it around. "Really?" Sam shrugged. "What's the worse that can happen? If something happens, so be it. Never hurts to try anything."

Sam bent down quickly, kissing you softly. His lips felt smooth against yours like running a hand over pliable silk. He swiftly ran a hand through your hair, pulling your face closer to his. Finally, he pulled away, smiling down at you.

"Nope." you shook your head. "Well hey, at least we know." He patted your shoulder, walking away towards a game of cards being played.

-

The next day you woke up with an intense headache. There was some leftover water and Ibuprofen on your nightstand. You didn't know how you made it back home or really remember anything at all from the night before.

You downed the pill and some water, making your way slowly to the bathroom, balancing yourself on a wall. You turned on the shower letting the hot water settle the uneasiness in your stomach. The pounding inside your head kept going on for what felt like hours. It didn't help either that you were trying so hard to remember the night before. Of course, you knew that you drank more than you could handle. Then there was Sam. But it all stopped there.

The shower helped a little bit. You danced around to find some clothes to get ready, or at least look decent. After getting ready, you drove back to Sam's. When he opened the door, you noticed Jake and Danny were there already. Except for no Josh. Not that it was out of the ordinary, it was just something you expected.

You made your way through his kitchen, pulling out a cigarette. "I don't think you really wanna be smoking that right now." You glared at him before putting the smoke out. "Um, do you remember what happened last night?" You asked, rubbing the small spot on your head in hopes to get rid of the pain. Sam bit into a piece of food, answering with his mouth full. "We kissed. Yeah," he nodded in assurance. "Yeah, we kissed." You let your head fall into your hands, groaning.

"How'd I get home?" Sam hummed, pointing his piece of food at you. "Josh. Although, he seemed pretty pissed at me. You were also super drunk." Right, you thought. Of course, this would happen to you. Partially you blamed yourself for being so stuck-up and bitchy most of the time, but part of you wishes Sam just pushed you away. Why were you so indecisive all the damn time? For once, it would be nice if you could make a whole-hearted decision without going out and fucking everything up.

You scratched around your eye, watching Sam as he went to go sit next to Jake.

4 weeks later. . .

It really had been almost a whole month that you had gone without talking to Josh. Some nights you wish you could pick up your phone and just text him, but you know it would go unnoticed. It hurt just a little bit. Every day you blamed yourself for screwing things up. When was it not your fault that something went wrong?

You sat bored at home. You tried to catch up on different things like laundry, cleaning, reorganizing literally everything, but nothing seemed to work. You muffled curses under your breath at nothing. That was until you got a text from Jake saying that everyone needed your 'strong womanly brain' to work with. Over the four-week period, you hadn't really talked with the other band members except for Danny (who seriously cares for anybody and everything), and Sam who just random stuff.

You flipped through a random magazine, flipping through the pages reading about the different styles and how to flaunt them. That was until a text from Sam disturbed you saying that everyone needed you at the studio ASAP.

You ran to your door faster than ever, quickly putting on your coat and shoes. When you arrived, no one was seen at first, so you went to the back and everyone was gathered around in a large, huddled circle. Jake was the first to greet you, Sam following close behind.

"Hey! I haven't seen you in a long time." Jake towered over you, pulling you into his side. "Yeah, my mom called. Wanted me to go see her." you lied, looking at Sam, who had just turned in the other direction. "Well, I hope she's doing good. Look, I wanted to see your opinion on some things. Just general stuff, okay?" you nodded. He led you back to a table and passed some papers around, and a little CD that had pre-recorded music. Before any of you could speak though, a door creaked loudly, and out came Josh with a petite girl beside him. His smile immediately disappeared when his eyes landed on you.

The girl looked. . . nice. In other words, she looked like a pleasant enough girl Josh would pick from a crowd. She had a tan, rich skin like his. With wavy, brown hair. Unlike Josh, she had more hazel-green eyes. Everyone stood there awkwardly, looking around at each other. You scratched the top of your head, eyes facing down towards the table. Jake cleared his throat before grabbing a seat for Josh, and the girl.

And of course, to make more room they were both seated in between you and Jake, making her sit right next to you. You smiled nervously towards her as she got herself situated. For a while, you stared at the velvet walls as Jake led on the conversation. You felt a little poke on your arm and noticed she was trying to talk to you.

"Hi, I'm Logan," she whispered. The one thing you noticed about Logan was her smile. It reminded you of Josh. His naturally bright teeth could make anyone instantly happier. "Y/N," you said curtly. You weren't the one to start a conversation, but luckily she made it easy.

"So, how do you know Josh?" she asked, pointing to him. You played around with your nails, turning to look at her. "Uh, I work for him," Not 'I'm his best friend or anything. Totally just ruined the relationship I had by kissing his younger brother because I'm really in love with the man your dating' "And them too, of course." you gave a hesitant laugh, pointing to the rest of them. She bit her lip, turning to listen to the conversation, and then back to you.

"How long have you known all of them, or like worked for them I guess?"

"Around three years. This will be my fourth I think." she nodded with your answer. Finally, she turned back around to listen to what Josh was saying.

You looked back down at the disc, swirling it around on the table. This is hard, you thought. It's all you can think about. Logan's so kind towards you; not the weirdly hostile type. She's not annoying, not inconclusive about anything. Logan's perfect in her own way. She's perfect to Josh. Something you've always wanted, but you, yourself stopped you from having.

"So, uh Y/N, can you take a listen to the CD?" Jake asked you. "Yeah. It'll just be a little later though. I have to finish some other stuff." There was silence as everyone stared at you. Including Josh, who seemed to have a permanent look on you.

"I can listen; if you're busy," Logan speaking up caught you by surprise. It may have angered you a bit because that was your job, to listen. You just looked back at Sam anxiously, who shook his head at you.

"Oh, my bad," Josh said loudly. "This is my girlfriend- Logan. Who you have all met before, but not Y/N. Forgot to introduce you two." If everyone hadn't been in the room right now, you would've gotten up and hit him right across the head. Logan kindly smiled back at you. "Yeah, we were talking earlier," She said pointing to you. "Well, as I said, I can listen if you can't."

If it was anybody else, you would've said something back already. But who were you to yell at this kind, beautiful woman next to you? Though, Sam must've read you wrong since quietly grabbed your wrist. "Sure," you said, handing the CD to Logan. Sitting back in your chair, defeated, what else were you supposed to do?

-

Another lousy week passed, and you wanted to jump off a roof. It had been raining for the past few days, never letting up once. No one had really made contact with you except Danny (you secretly loved him to death), and Sam. You were pretty sure the rest had picked up on the tense atmosphere and didn't want to bother you. No doubt, you probably wouldn't want to speak with yourself either.

You shrugged off a sweater, playing with the end of your sheets. Life was so boring now without any entertainment from anyone. You eventually rolled over on your back, staring a hole into the ceiling. You went over every excuse and explanation you could give to Josh. You understood why he was mad, you figured that much. But sometimes you wish he had his smart wisdom back to understand you better.

You fell to the floor sometime later, reading something random off the shelf. You flipped through the pages mindlessly before you heard some knocking at your door. You ran quickly, opening the door to find Sam standing there with bottles of gin and tequila in his hand. Laughing quietly, you led him inside, finding some bottles for drinks.

"What brings you around?" you raised your eyebrows, pouring some tequila for you and Sam. "Josh," he cleared his throat, taking a few sips. "What about Josh?" Trying to hold your breath, made you curious as to why Josh's younger brother was so angry at him. In fact, you wanted to burst out laughing. "He's so stubborn with everything, and the way he talks about you. God- it's like- I've never seen so much hatred from him." Sam shook his head downing the rest of his drink. He poured some more in his cup and your cup.

You took Sam's hand leading him to your room. You put on Labi Siffre, an old, classic album. You also turned on one of your dim colored lights. They lit up Sam's cheekbones perfectly, making his pale skin glow flawlessly. It looked smooth enough to run a finger over and feel the gentle, velvety skin of Sam.

"How does he talk about me?" Sam closed his eyes, thinking. "He just doesn't let go of the subject. Anytime you or I come up, it's just this rage of fury from him. He almost shuts down essentially. You know," he burped. "They all went out tonight."

You hummed at that. "They all went out, leaving behind you and me." You scoffed at the thought of Josh with Logan at your favorite bar or restaurant. "I'm so sorry Sam." You rubbed his arm, looking down at the floor next to your bed. "That was you and your brother's relationship, and I just," you flicked your hands, making a whoosh sound. Sam laughed, leaning into your side. "Don't worry about it. I like helping you out. Josh can be a little much sometimes."

You elbowed him in the side thinking about something. "Hey whatever happened to the girl from the music shop? You ever talk to her lately?"

"Yeah," he huffed out. "We've been talking lately. She wants to meet up sometime soon, but I don't know." You cocked your head to the side. "Why not. You clearly like her and she really likes you. I don't remember when the last time some actually liked you." Sam pretended he was hurt, pushing you to the side. "I'll ask her sometime when I'm not busy. She's nice."

"And pretty?" you questioned. Sam let out a laugh, swirling the alcohol in his cup. "Very pretty." You both let out sighs sitting in comfortable silence. Although, your mind was occupied with thoughts of Josh, swirling around and never-ending. There were times you just wanted to get up and say fuck it and try to at least explain. But of course, the rejection of him never wanting to be your friend again would kill you. Maybe this was the universe's cruel way of saying you and Josh were never meant to be together in the first place.

If so, you hated it.

-

Surprisingly, Sam was the first to wake up. Which rarely happens considering how well you knew him. The poor boy slept through everything. He started shaking you awake, poking and tickling your sides. "Are you dead, jeez?" You quickly rubbed your eyes, sitting up. "Sorry, the alcohol must've really knocked me out." Sam stifled a yawn, sitting on the edge of your bed. "Well, we can do one of two things today," he noted. "We can either go to the studio and face my brother, or we can- do nothing else. That's really it. I kind of swore I would be there today."

You couldn't stay inside any longer. You decided against the greater good to tag along with Sam. Maybe you could talk with Josh, and clear the air. "Can I go with you?" Sam nodded feverishly. "Of course; that's like your job."

"It doesn't feel like it. Logan's pretty much taking over, so what's the point of me." You scoffed thinking of the mellow girl who seemed to get along with everyone. You hated to slander her, but you just wanted Josh back. You and Sam left in a rush, hastily driving to the studio. You walked inside with a cigarette dangling from your lips, smoke escaping through your nose. Sweat seeped from your palms making you excited and nervous at the same time. You felt like an outsider coming in on your job. Thinking about seeing Josh made it worse.

"Hello, Hello Y/N" Danny strutted over, hairs sticking to his forehead. He pulled you in for a tight hug, nearly suffocating you. "Hey, Daniel." you moved the hairs around his face so you could see him better. "Long time, no see, man." He laughed walking back to his seat behind the drum kit. You followed Sam to the other rooms where Jake and Josh might be hiding. Sure enough, Josh was standing next to his twin, listening to a riff he was playing. They immediately stopped talking to each other. Josh scoffed at you as Sam led you inside, beside him.

"Look what the cat dragged in!" Josh said it lowly, spitting it towards you. Your eyes looked down, not daring to ever lookup. "Hey Josh," Sam patted him on the shoulder. You looked awkwardly around the room looking for a means to escape. When you realized there wasn't one, you looked back at Josh. He quietly talked to Jake about something before turning to you. You tried to look away fast enough, but his eyes caught yours. Josh started to stalk close to you, exhaling a breath. "Hey," you thought he might've not heard you, but his response caught you off guard.

"Hey, Y/N" He sniffled a little bit before turning towards you. "Care to take a walk with me? Could use some fresh air." You nodded your head silently, following after him. If your anxiety hadn't kicked in yet, it sure as hell did now. Josh was never a person to scare you. He was too light and giddy for him to be somewhat freighting.

He walked slightly behind you with a hand on the small of your back. Josh eventually let go of you when you both made it to the sidewalk. The people around you made the silence slightly more comfortable but you wished you had something to think about other than Josh. After a few more moments of silence, you decided to speak up, but Josh beat you to it. "I'm sorry for being an ass," he cleared it all out on one breath. You scoffed at him. "I think you were being more than an ass, Josh." He suddenly slowed his walking to match your pace.

"You pretty much left me in the wind. I thought I lost my best friend," you nudged him softly in the ribcage, laughing. He held a hand over his chest, heaving out a relieved breath. "I thought you were going to hate me forever." You pointed at him before saying: "Pull anything like that again, and I'll do more than just hate you forever."

Josh held his hands up abruptly like you had caught him stealing something. "I promise." You smirked. The both of you walked around endlessly making small talk here and there. Part of you was glad that you and Josh had cleared the air. Although, you hadn't really talked with him about Sam. It embarrassed you just thinking about the whole situation.

After you made a full round of the streets, Josh walked you back inside the studio. It was hours before anyone ever got to go home. The moon had fully risen and was shining brightly in the sky. You stared up like a child, holding on tightly to your coat. When you were making your way towards Sam's car Josh had grabbed you by the elbow.

"Y/N," Josh fiddled around with the collar of his jacket, looking down at the concrete. Even though it was pitch black outside, you could tell Josh's face was heating up. "I was wondering if you wanted to come back with me? I know Sam was taking you home, but I still feel like we need to talk." A small smile started to quickly form. You nodded not thinking about the harm that could come from staying with Josh.

"Yeah, sure." you let a hesitant sigh before following him once more. When you arrived inside Josh's home it felt almost foreign. There were slightly disheveled things around, but nothing had really changed. It still had all the same scattered records on the coffee table as well as random books set around the countertops. Josh flipped on the light switch and went towards the kitchen. He came back out and handed you a cup of water before taking off his coat.

"I know, it's been a long time since we spoke," he started. "or even hung out together."

You nodded, sipping some of the water. "Yeah, I kind of missed that."

-

After you and Josh got situated, he led you back to his room. There was a dim lamp, along with some new fairy lights scattered around the ceiling. "Fairy lights?" You pointed to the little bulbs sparkling brightly. "Oh, yeah," Josh was picking out a record, finally placing it on the player. It was an album you hadn't heard before, but it seemed to fit the mood well enough. Looking around for a little bit longer you come to find some old pictures on the floor. Squatting down, you noticed they were photos of his brothers and Daniel when they were younger. But what really caught your attention was a stack neatly dedicated to you.

Some of the photos had showcased some of you and Josh's late adventures, and the concerts you had appeared to. One in particular in which Josh had his arms wrapped around your middle, seated around a bonfire. That was a night you remember very clearly. That was when you realized how much you loved Josh. He never left your side and coddled you close to him. The memory warmed your heart making it beat a tiny bit faster.

"That was a very hot summer night if I remember correctly." Josh peered over your shoulder, studying the picture. "Yeah, it was. Then I passed out inside the van right after that," you laughed loudly, tossing your head back. Running a finger over your face in the picture still reminiscing on the sweet memory, you could feel Josh watching you from across the room.

"Can you come up here for a sec?" Josh patted his mattress, motioning to you. You could tell he was nervous still when he started to fumble around with his nails, not making much eye contact. "Do you remember when I asked you why you envied me so much?" He let out a slow breath, nudging you a little bit with his elbow. You realized the change in the situation and started to mirror his nervous tics.

"Yeah, I just- wish I could carry myself like you. You're always the most confident person in the room; you know things Josh that no one could ever know." The two of you sat in silence for a little bit after you answered. Josh hesitated before speaking again but continued on after pondering for a bit. "Well, I never felt that way around you. For the longest time, I would beat myself up just thinking about how wonderful you are Y/N. The way you think of me is how I always thought of you. Just not as confident because of how quiet you are sometimes." He laughed out the last part making you smile back.

"God, sometimes I just want to cry because of how amazing you are Y/N. Everything you've done for this band, everything you've done for me; I just - I love you." You slowly turned your head to look at Josh, replaying the words over and over again in your head.

He loves you.

"I'm going to assume you mean in it in that way Josh or this would be very embarrassing." Josh snickered, putting both hands on the side of your face. "I mean it in every way possible." He finally pressed his lips to yours, feeling the velvet touch of each other. Josh ran his fingers through your hair, pressing his tongue in an open-mouthed kiss. You moaned quietly when he started to press kisses along your jaw, down to your neck. You could feel his hands start to travel down to your waist, hugging you tightly as it showed in the picture.

Josh continued to bite down on your skin and sucked, leaving bright red marks behind. His fingers squeezed down on your hips before traveling under your shirt. He placed a knee between your legs, pushing you further into the mattress. You looked at each other momentarily as Josh slipped you out of your shirt. He ran his hands over your stomach making you flinch at the sudden touch.

"Josh," His name came out as a whine as Josh slipped off your bra, throwing it towards the floor. You caught the look of awe when his eyes landed on your breasts, your chest heaving slightly. He returned to kissing down your neck making his way down your collar bone. Your hands made their way to his hair, tugging at it when his mouth made contact with your nipple.

He sucked gently, swirling his tongue around the hardened bud. All you could think about was the euphoric thoughts running through your brain. All you could see were stars, showing up in random directions making you lost in the feeling. Josh continued for a while before slowly traveling down to your legs.

Josh looked at you for approval, to which you vaguely nodded in return, before pulling off your pants. You shuddered at the delicate touch of his fingers ghosting along your skin. His hands traveled back up your calves, pressing at your thighs. The room suddenly became too hot as his fingers wrapped around the strap of your underwear, pulling them down your legs. Your breathing was so ragged by now that you thought Josh might've pointed it out already, but he continued to stare down at you with the most mesmerizing look in his eyes. You knew at this point if this had been anyone else, you probably would've wanted to hide under the bed. Something so comforting about Josh made it feel natural to in his grasps.

Josh started down at your ankles, pressing hard kisses up your legs. He hovered over your pelvis just before kissing around your clit. Your legs immediately started to close at the feeling, but his hand pushed them back farther. "Josh, oh my god!" You moaned out into nothing. He continued sucking hard on your clit making the stars in your head come closer to earth.

"Josh, please," Your hands pulled at his curls as he lapped around your center. "You're so fucking wet for me Y/N. Jesus," He moaned into your heat making you squirm on the bed.

"Please Josh, use your fingers, please." You whined mercilessly at the thought of coming around his fingers. It wasn't long before you felt two fingers drag inside of you, along with the feeling of him sucking your clit. You could feel yourself getting nearer to your orgasm as he curled his fingers against your g-spot. "Josh, don't fucking stop!"

At the perfect moment, everything seemed to fall apart in the most beautiful way. You leaned your head back into the pillow as your vision turned white with little black dots appearing randomly. Josh's breath fanned over your heat before he stood up to take off some of his clothes.

"Can't really have sex if I'm still dressed like I'm going to fucking prom or something, Jesus." You giggled loudly while you watched him crawl back over you. Josh pressed a soft kiss to your lips, grinding his hips against you. Your hand slowly ran over his chest, grabbing onto his belt. You fumbled around until you managed to get it undone along with his pants. Josh stared at your face, admiring your features. "I don't think I'll be able to take you seriously for much longer if you don't do something," you whispered.

"Oh yeah?" Josh raised an eyebrow, smiling at you. You slowly reached past his briefs making contact with his hard-on, causing him to moan quietly and start kissing you again.

"Uh, I don't think I have any condoms on me; I didn't really envision fucking you tonight." You smirked, wrapping your arms around his neck. "It's okay. I'm on the pill." You pulled his underwear down, hiking your legs around his hips loosely. You could feel yourself getting wetter as he passively rolled his forefinger over your clit. You kissed him hard, sucking on his tongue. "Fuck me, please," you begged. Josh looked deeply into your eyes, then grabbing your legs and wrapping them around his hips, tightly. He teased you, rubbing himself up and down your center.

You exhaled as he entered you, wrapping a hand around his bicep to steady yourself. Josh's head fell into your neck, feeling his warm breath as he trusted in slowly. He lifted his head to kiss you; He used his hand to move the hairs out of your face, wrapping it around your cranium. "You are so- prepossessing." He whispered, his thrust becoming faster.

Your nails dug into his shoulder blades after he set such a brutal pace that you didn't think you'd be able to keep up with. You took note of how his curls stuck to his forehead. Whenever he thrust in, you could feel yourself getting closer and closer. His thrust started to shake the bed only spurring you on more. Your hands grabbed at his torso, holding onto him tightly.

"Josh," you breathed out, words lost as they left your mouth. "Don't stop." Josh looked between your bodies as they pressed together. He thrust in deep, pressing you into the bed further. You cursed under your breath, trying to hold back the moans only releasing small high-pitched whines. Your head fell back against the pillow, all the tension releasing your body slowly. "Fuck," Josh moaned into your collarbone. He tightened his grip on your thigh, quickening his thrusts.

You ran your fingers along the nape of his neck, feeling the little hairs stick to his body. Josh moaned, feeling him cum deep inside you. His head fell into your neck as you both tried to catch your breath. Josh smiled, pressing kisses to your chest before laying down next to you.

"Fuck you're amazing," Josh mumbled into your ear. He wrapped an arm around your shoulder pulling your head to his chest. His hands ran down your arm, squeezing the tiny bit of flesh. "Tell me something I don't already know Joshua." You flipped over onto your side, Josh following in pursuit. He tightened his arm once more around your stomach this time. He pressed small kisses along your shoulder, laying his face into your hair.

"I love you," He mumbled.

"I love you too." You placed your hand over his, peace finding you easy tonight.

-

When you woke up the next morning, Josh still had you in his arms, snoring softly. Like you, he liked to get up when it was still dark out, but given last night you couldn't blame either of yourselves for wanting to sleep in. Josh woke up sometime after, pressing small kisses into the nape of your neck down to your shoulder blades.

"Good morning," he said quietly, wrapping his legs around yours, pulling his body closer to yours.

"Morning Josh." You closed your eyes allowing the quiet of the room to comfort you. It seemed pretty peaceful outside, from what you could hear at least. But your mind was running a thousand miles a minute. How did a three-year friendship change so drastically? If someone told you that three years later you'd be sleeping with Josh, you probably start cursing them out at the bare minimum. Josh infuriated you at the beginning, but what changed that you couldn't get enough? Maybe it was his style? Everyone loves Josh's style. He doesn't really care what goes together, as long as it fits him and his outrageous personality. Speaking of which, Josh's personality was unspoken of. People turned heads when he walked through doors because he was always the life of the party. Normal people just naturally gravitate towards him. Heck, you couldn't even keep up the 'holding a grudge' façade for too long because Josh helped you. Maybe you thanked him for that instead.

"I think we need to get up," you said, patting his hand. He protested that you two keep sleeping longer because it's too early. "Josh it's like," you squinted your eyes towards the clock. "Nine am." You yelled, pushing his arm of you.

You ran into the bathroom to pee before jumping in the shower. After taking some time cleaning yourself and changing into something more comfortable (which ended up being one of Josh's old college sweatshirts because he insisted you looked really good in them) you both left to the studio. Of course, the first one to greet you was your favorite out of the four, Daniel. After he finished talking with Josh, he led the both of you to a back room. It was a large decorated room that you hadn't really been in much. The walls were in stripes of inverted red along with carpet having a velvet touch to it. Plaques labeled the wall with other types of scandalous music art.

Jake and Sam walked in together already arguing about something. "Lookey here," Jake pulled you into a side hug, and Sam passed you a drink. "I thought my smoking habits were bad, but drinking at ten in the morning?" you tutted Sam away from you, taking a seat at a large table. "It helps me think more clearly."

Josh took a seat next to you, placing a hand on your thigh. "Hey, you never showed me the finish drawing for your clothing ideas." You raised your eyebrows and said: "I wonder why." You cocked your head to the side, and Josh frowned at you. Snickering to yourself, you handed him a sketchbook. "These are- really good, Y/N. I forgot you could draw so well." You doodled around the paper of a sketched-out Josh in what would be fashion attire for next year. "One of my many hobbies."

He patted your leg before turning his attention to his twin. Sam waltzed over to your side, a cigarette hanging from his lips. "Is that my brother's sweatshirt?" You glared at him before answering a subtle yes. Sam gasped in a fake manner, holding a hand across his heart.

"Are you two in love with each other finally?" Sam laughed at you giving him a side-eye. "Good. you make Josh happy." Content with that, he left to go sit next to Danny. You played around with the drawing some more, later on, moving to a computer to work there. Everyone left you alone to go play in another room which seems to help numb the background noise. Though, it didn't last long until Josh walked through the door. He strutted over to you, rubbing a hand on your back before sitting down.

"How's it goin' in there?" You closed the laptop, turning your attention towards him. Josh talked about how everything's coming along nicely, and Jake is stubborn about everything or how Sam is always messing up. You hummed, following along. Not that you would ever tell Josh, but sometimes you never would really listen to what he was saying, but you loved to watch his hand movements or the expressions on his face. It added to his character. "I meant to ask you some time ago, but uh- whatever happened to Logan?" Josh immediately froze, looking down to the floor like a scolded puppy.

"I told her I would talk to her later this week." You shook your head, crossing your arms. "What?"

"Nothing; I was just thinking we wouldn't be in this mess if it weren't for me oodling with your brother." Josh laughed at your choice of words, placing his hand softly on yours. "I think it was both us Y/N."

'Well, in my defense Sam is kind of hot now that I think about it." Josh slapped your shoulder. "Mmmm, you're right Sam does have that 'sense' to him." Time seemed to fly by the five of you, constantly arguing, laughing, or just goofing off with each other. It felt good to be back with everybody, and not walking around on eggshells. Sometimes the moment was so pleasant, you never wanted it to end.

-

It was eerily quiet when you walked inside Josh's home. It was nighttime, and the moon was full, shining brightly through the curtains. "Don't you ever wish you could see the stars?" Josh asked randomly.

"Light pollution man," He mumbled out, yeah, heading towards his bedroom. You peeked outside the window one more time, catching a glimpse of the clouds in the sky. Josh had changed into some comfier clothing and slid under the covers. You followed in pursuit, still wearing his old college t-shirt. "Where do you think we'll be in ten years?" The question had taken you by surprise. You knew he had a tendency to think a lot about the future, which was kind of admirable, but you had a hard time figuring out what the future would hold for you.

"That's hard to tell; Not unless I kill you first, but uh, I think we'll still be together, and so will the band. I guess it's just up to the rest of us." Josh hummed at your input. He flipped over on his side to look at you. "I hope we're together forever." Your face started to blush, although you doubt Josh could see, this time you wished he did.

"Me too." Your voice came out with full confidence knowing every ounce of you could never let him go. "Hey, do you think you'd ever let me wear your outfits after this next tour? They're kind of stylish if I say so myself." Josh laughed out loud. "I don't think they'd fit you, honey." You scoffed, pouting.

"Josh, I hate to break it to you but you're not that big." A playful laugh escaped your mouth while you pinched his arm. He pushed you back in return. "I meant your height." He shook his head. You turned around, allowing Josh to trap you in his arms.

"I hope I get to see you in heaven. If there is one." The sound of his voice made you want to cry. It was soft whisper that it felt so delicate at this moment.

"I think if you've seen me then, you will see me forever."

#greta van fleet #josh kiszka #sam kiskza #jake kiszka #danny wagner #jake gvf #josh kiszka x reader

[damebositos]

selfship shit

so ive been bingeing the hell out of shows lately and it got me thinking about which of these bitches would be into which shows and different medias of mine they'd like --------------------------------------------

bo: its mid day, the town's dead and everyone's inside, it's quiet except for the living room tv blaring the sounds of Judi getting her shit rocked. Bo would LOVE Bad Girls Club, he lives for the drama, the violence, and shit talking almost everyone on the show. he does not miss an episode and is usually spot on at guessing who ends up staying the whole season. He's obviously into rock so i'd put that bitch onto some Greta Van Fleet, he'd act like it wasn't his thing but he'd end up humming parts of different songs that were stuck in his head. Listen he doesn't like them it's just that Safari Song is so damn catchy.

nick: it's movie night !! we've got everything, snacks, drinks, bud, and of course the movie. except its not a movie but instead fight videos on youtube.... annddd im making him watch The Mummy with me for the third day in a row. its nothing but laughing at people talking shit only to get one good one to the dome and criticizing weak ass jabs. the tv's off and we're chilling by the speaker, puffing away to some SZA. Long car rides with Static-X blaring from the giant ass system in Nick's trunk has my brain and eyeballs rattling in my skull and my body buzzing with a sort of nostalgic vibration.

lester: it's been a long, rough day and i just want to cuddle on the couch with my homie and watch some of The Rifleman, nothing better to make you forget than a nice western starring a mortally good dad and son duo with each episode guaranteeing the same happy ending. Lester makes comments throughout the episode, not so much as to start a conversation but to validate the protags' actions or to scold a character. He's really into old country, it's what he was raised on, and some modern stuff, although he doesn't like how materialistic and fake it's become. Got really into Tyler Childers when he heard him and it gave him a sort of hope for the genre.

reggie: shooting him with my americanization beam, were watching Young Guns and animal documentaries, all is fun until he decides to put on one centered around Australia and then my ass is tripping bc holy fuck what type of mutant ass bugs--... Helping him around the land and convincing him to turn off his music in favor of some Marty Robbins. Songs of hard work and yearning relate to him and he enjoys the storytelling and how gentle everything sounds, despite the sad lyrics. he still thinks his music is better tho.

#me projecting in lesters #ive been having such bad bo and nick brainworms #selfship #selfshipping #bo sinclair #nick jones #nick #lester sinclair #reggie morgan #reg morgan #a + b

[golbrocklovely]

now yall saying im new here and im nosy??? ive been here since 2018 sorry i dont know every single girl colby has been with yall are the nosy ones... and i dont care or want to know who yall are talking about its just annoying that yall are gatekeeping and saying yall dont want to give them attention and then keep talking about them it doesn't make sense

against probably my better judgement, i'm not gonna block you.

i will however turn off anon, because i'm done getting yelled out or belittled for having opinions or doing things in a way that others don't like. if you want to discuss or say the same thing to me with your username in full display, by all means, do so.

first off, i know i wasn't the one that called you nosy, but... you are nosy. WE ALL ARE. that's why any of the asks i get are gossip for the most part. we all want to know the deets that go on behind the scenes. some of you truly think i know what happens with colby, but in all honesty i don't. this was all meant to be fun and silly, bc again... NONE OF THIS INFORMATION IS IMPORTANT.

we're literally talking about whether or not colby has hooked up with someone. it's 1000% not deep or meaningful of a discussion at all.

and no offense, but you obviously care bc you keep messaging me about it. and i think the person meant you were new to this fanbase, the tumblr fanbase, not the fandom as a whole.

also, it can't be gatekept if it easily researchable, like you said it is.

and both you and the other anon are a little too hung up on the attention part and not on the part where i say i block out ppl's names so they don't get hate.

here, would you like to know all the girls colby has been connected to and assumed to have been with in some capacity? i've complied a list.

amber

shea

rosalie

halle

jessica

greta

stas

natalie

tanya

lilly

dana

iris

sara

andrea

bri

kayla

veronica

cara

arzaylea

aubrey

some of the ppl in this list aren't real, but i guess you're gonna have to figure that one out for yourself. i might have even missed some too, or purposefully left others off.

or who knows, maybe i'm lying.

and with that, anonymous is officially off :)

#ask #personal

[tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors]

(Asdfghjkl I'm not sure whether I'm the glitchy anon but I'm gonna resend just in case, sorry to spam if that wasn't me) I read Fair Folk And Fortresses at least 5 times since you posted it and I was wondering if you had any lore or fun fact to share about it?

sure! have some Fun Facts

they are all (other than elliot obviously) in early college, because i think that the fact that “irl” LAMP took even longer to hook up than laoft-canon LAMP is hysterical

Patton and Logan were both a little jelly of Janus during the Durant x Roman’s character bits but Virgil was absolutely SEETHING with it

he pranked the SHIT of out of Janus for like 2 weeks before Jay was like LISTEN you boneheaded imbecile i do not have any designs on your fucking boyfriend!!

also Janus has NO business bitching about Virgil’s pining because he’s been mutually besotted with Roman’s (fraternal) twin Remus for nearly as long and everyone knows except them

Greta responded to her crush on Toby Fischer in an absolutely IDENTICAL way as she did in Smitten, which is to say alarmed confusion and screaming

the only Baumgartener sibling with any amount of romantic sense is Ellie because they think kissing is icky

Greta is going to INSIST she deserves at least 80% of the credit for these four MORONS finally getting their heads out of their asses for, oh, the rest of their lives

Janus is going to be very relieved he doesnt have to deal with their mooning any longer for exactly 10 minutes before he realizes that no longer being distracted by each other means they are gonna dial up the scheming about his love life, at which point he is going to begin silently, hysterically panicking

rest in fucking pieces jay

#dukeceit #romantic dukeceit #romantic lamp #platonic anxceit #creativitwins #anonymous

[emo-space-tea]

Jealousy

NOT MY GIF

Chapter 3

~3rd Person POV~

The five losers got to the sewer and dropped their bikes. Well, except Stan, he put his on its kickstand.

"That's poison ivy, and that's poison ivy, and that's poison ivy." Stan said while pointing at three similar looking plants.

"Where? W..Where's the poison ivy?" Eddie asked, seeming slightly panicked.

"Nowhere! Not every fucking plant is poison ivy Stanley!" Richie exclaimed.

Bill, Richie and Ashton walked into the sewer while Eddie and Stan stayed just outside of it.

"Okay, well, I'm starting to get itchy...now, and I'm pretty sure this is not-" Eddie started until Richie cut him off.

"Do you use the same bathroom as your mother?" Richie asked.

"Sometimes, Yeah." Eddie responded honestly.

"Then you probably have crabs!" Richie said.

"That's so not funny." Eddie responded again.

Ashton and Bill had their flashlights and were searching the sewer for......well, anything really.

Richie turned around and looked at Eddie and Stan.

"Aren't you guys coming in?" Richie asked the two.

"Nu uh. It's grey water." Eddie stated while pointing at the dark water.

"What's Grey water?" Ashton asked, jumping in the conversation.

"It's basically.....piss and shit, that's all I'm telling you! You three are splashing around in....millions of gallons of 'Derry Pee'!" Eddie said, obviously worried about his health.

Richie dipped a stick he found in the water, and sniffed it.

"Jesus Rich!" Ashton exclaimed, grossed out.

"Are you serious, what are you-" Eddie was cut off again.

"Doesn't smell like caca to me senor~" Richie said in a horrible Spanish accent.

After that Eddie started ranting about infections, then Richie threw something. Ashton was paying closer attention to the real reason they were there. Then Ashton saw something in the water.

"Billy! Look." Ashton mumbled to Bill.

He picked up what she  was pointing at. It was a shoe. 

Bill turned around and shouted "Guys!". The rest of the losers quickly shut up, and stared at him. Then they noticed the shoe in his hand.

"Shit.....Don't tell me that's...." Stan said in a nervous voice.

"No." Ashton responded.

"G-G-Georgie wore galoshes." Bill continued as Richie walked up next to them.

"Who's sneaker is it?" Eddie asked quickly.

Ashton pointed the flashlight inside the shoe and Richie looked inside.

"It's Betty Ripsom's" Richie answered.

"...Shit...Oh..God..Oh Fuck!" Eddie exclaimed. "I don't like this." Eddie said.

"How do you think Betty feels....running around in these tunnels with only one freaking shoe!" Richie jokes while hopping on one foot.

"Not Now Rich." Ashton snapped, seriously.

"What if she's still here?" Stan asked, and Bill, Richie and Ashton all turned around to continue looking in the sewer.

"Eddie, come on!" Richie called out as we walked further.

"My mom will have an aneurysm, okay, if she finds out we're playing down here, I'm serious." Eddie said quickly, obviously panicking.

Bill was still looking in the sewer.

"Bill?" Eddie called out.

"If....If I was Betty Ripsom, I would want us to find her, G-G-Georgie too." Bill responded.

"What if I don't wanna find her." Eddie said. We all stared at him. "I mean, no offense Bill, but I don't wanna end up like Geo-" Eddie cut himself off to spare Bill's emotions.

 "I don't wanna go missing either" Eddie finished.

"He has a point." Stan spoke up. 

"You too, Stanny?" Ashton asked.

"It's summer, we're supposed to be having fun! This isn't fun, this is scary and disgusting." Stan said, looking down.

Suddenly, there was a splash from behind Eddie and Stan. They all went to see what it was, it was the new kid, all banged up and bleeding.

"Holy Shit, What happened to you?" Richie asked, leaving the sewer.

The new kid looked over at them, out of breath. Stan and Eddie rushed over to help him, shortly after so did Ashton.

They picked up the new kid and put him on Silver, Bill's bike, and got on their own bikes. They rushed to the Drugstore. While they were riding, Eddie kept ranting about "An AIDS epidemic" currently happening, but none of them really listened though.

They finally got there and dropped their bikes in the alleyway. Bill set the new kid down on a crate and told Richie to wait with him while they got the supplies.

The four losers rushed into the drug store. Eddie quickly grabbed what he needed, while the other 3 looked in their pockets for any money they had. The sum was $6.23.

"Can we afford all that?" Bill asked Eddie.

"That's all we got." Stan said with only a bit of cash and change in his hands.

"Are you kidding me?" Eddie asked with all the medical supplies in his small arms. He started biting with lip thinking.

"Wait, You have an account here, don't you?" Ashton asked.

"If my mom finds out I bought all this stuff for myself, I'm spending the whole rest of the weekend in the emergency room getting X-rayed." Eddie said, while shaking his head no.

A couple aisles over Beverly Marsh, the school's 'Slut', was looking at the Tampax, confused. She made up her mind and went to pay when she saw Greta Kenne walking down the aisle. She quickly went to the next one which wasn't any better.

Luckily, Ashton saw the box and quickly gestured for Beverly to hide it behind her back, and she did. The other three boys looked over and saw Beverly.

"Are you okay?" Bill asked her.

"I'm fine, what's wrong with you?" Beverly asked, seeing all the medical supplies in Eddie's arms.

"None of your business." Stan replied.

"There's a kid outside, looked like someone killed him." Eddie also responded. Ashton quickly slapped Eddie's arm, giving him a 'Really?!' look.

"We need some supplies but we don't have enough money." Ashton told Beverly.

Beverly thought for a second, before coming up with a plan and saying "I think I know what to do, but I'll need Ashton's help."

The two girls walked up the check out.

"We like your glasses, Mr. Kenne." Beverly started.

"You look just like Clark Kent." Ashton continued.

"Oh, well, I don't know about that." Mr. Kenne said while adjusting his glasses.

"Can we try them?" Beverly asked abruptly.

"Well, Sure." Mr. Kenne answered while taking off his glasses and handing them to Beverly.

Beverly put them on and looked at the pervert through her eyelashes.

"What do you think?" The redhead asked.

"Well, How bout that. You look just like Louis Lane." Mr. Kenne said while leaning in.

"Definitely." Ashton said while looking at Beverly.

Beverly then took off the glasses and handed them to Ashton. The petite girl put them on and looked at Beverly and Mr. Kenne.

"How do I look?" Ashton asked.

Little did she know that the boy with a stutter and his curly haired friend were staring at her. A light red blush grazing their cheeks.

"Perfect." Mr. Kenne said.

The small girl then took off the glasses and when handing them back to Mr. Kenne,  'accidentally' knocked over the small shelf of cigarettes behind the counter.

"Oh, I'm so sorry." Ashton apologized in a sincere voice.

"It's okay. " Mr. Kenne said while putting on his glasses and bending down to clean up the fallen shelf.

While the pervert was cleaning, Ashton and Beverly looked back to see the 3 losers rushing to leave the store with their supplies. Bill accidentally shoved Eddie causing him to trip and knock over a few items before actually leaving.

Beverly saw a pack of cigarettes on the counter and quickly grabbed them and shoved them in her pocket.

Out in the alleyway the Losers were trying to help the new kid. 

"Can you go get me something?" Eddie asked, while trying to get the wound to stop bleeding.

"Jesus, what do you need?" Richie asked.

"Go get my bifocals. I hid them in my second fanny pack." Eddie said.

"Why do you have two fanny packs?" Stan asked.

Bill walked out of the alleyway to see Beverly walking towards him, wind blowing in her hair. Bill then pulled out a dollar from his pocket and showed it to Beverly.

"T-T-Thanks." Bill said.

"Even Steven." Beverly said while pulling out her new pack of cigarettes.

The two then heard Stan freaking out and looked to see what was going on. 

"Ben from Soc?" Beverly asked herself before going in the alley way.

Eddie and Richie were arguing and Ashton was sitting on a crate. 

"Are you okay? That looks like it hurts." Beverly said while walking up to the group.

"Oh, No, I'm good. I just fell." Ben said, smiling at the redhead.

"Yeah, right into Henry Bowers!" Richie exclaimed. 

"S-S-S-Shut up R-R-Richie." Bill said.

"Why? It's the truth." Richie said back.

"You sure they got the right stuff, to fix you up?" Beverly asked while Bill stared at her.

Ashton noticed this and started feeling a pain in her chest. Ashton then got up and shoved Richie out of the way and walked to her bike.

"Where the hell are you going?" Richie asked, seeing the small girl get her bike.

"Home." Ashton answered quickly.

"But-" Stan was cut off by Ashton.

"You guys know how Alex gets!" Ashton exclaimed while glaring at the group.

She then got on her bike and started riding out of the alleyway. 

"But It's not past-!" Stan yelled, but Ashton was already gone. "Your curfew yet."

 "Is she okay?" Beverly asked.

"Y-Y-Yeah, I'm sure." Bill lied.

"Okay, well maybe I'll see you around." Beverly said.

"We were thinking about going to the Q-Q-Quarry tomorrow, if you wanna come." Bill told Beverly.

"Good to know, Thanks. Oh and, Who's Alex?" Beverly asked.

"H-H-He's Ashton's Ste-" Bill was cut off by Eddie.

"None of your business." Eddie answered.

"E-E-Eddie." Bill said sternly.

"No, he's right. It took Ash four years to tell us. Why should she know?" Stan defended.

Bill tried to think of a reason, but nothing came out. There was silence for a couple of minutes.

"If you wanna know, go and ask her. She lives on 29 oaks street." Richie said.

"Okay then, Thanks anyways." Beverly said before walking out to the alleyway.

"Nice going bringing up Bowers in front of her." Stan said to Richie.

"Yeah you heard what she did." Eddie said, agreeing.

"What'd she do?" Ben asked.

"More like who'd she do! From what I hear the list is longer than my wang." Richie answered, grabbing his crotch. 

"That's not saying much." Stan said.

"There j-j-j-j-just rumors." Bill said defending the redhead

"Anyway, Bill had her back in the third grade. They kissed in the school play. Reviews said you can't fake that sort of passion." Richie told Ben.

"Now!" Richie clapped his hands. "Pip Pip and tally ho my good fellows! I do believe this chap required our utmost attention, get in there Doctor K, come on, fix him up." Richie said in a horrible British accent.

"Why don't you shut to fuck up Einstein, because I know what I'm doing and I don't want you doing the British guy with me right now." Eddie responded.

"Suck the wound. Get in there." Richie Exclaimed.

Even though Ashton didn't say it, Richie and Eddie knew she was filled with Jealousy.

*•~Emo-Gay-Tea~•*

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#it 2017 #it chapter 1 #thank you losers #ashton wenbrooke #bill denbrough #you'll float too #oc insert #beverly marsh #losers club #stan uris