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cillianmesoftlyyy · 5 months

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As You Wish | Neil Lewis x fem!reader

Summary| You've had your eye on Neil for a while now and Neil's friends can tell but Neil isn't so sure until you come into Gumshoe Video with a boy on your arm with horrible taste in date-night cinema. When the date goes awry, Neil jumps to action.

Warning| Age gap, reader (19) and Neil (27), rudeness, flirting, touching, Neil being a little creepy, Neil's dubious consent, talk of virginity and inexperience, kissing, blowjob.

Mastermind- Taylor Swift (yeah, I said it) 🎵

Colorblind- Counting Crows 🎶

word count: 4933k

*sentences in italics are quotes from The Princess Bride (1987)

Please read warnings before continuing- thanks!

“That kid keeps coming around. If you’re not careful she’s gonna fall in love and you’ll be in deep shit,” Lucien fixed the thick frame of his glasses on his angular nose and returned the fake pipe to his mouth.

“Why don’t you shut up, Lucien. It’s not like that. Just keep your weird thoughts to yourself in my store.” Neil called over his shoulder as he stocked the shelves with returned VHS tape sleeves. He ran his elbow over his forehead, wiping away the thin layer of perspiration.

“Everyone’s thinking it…” Lucien raised his hands in defense and Neil rolled his eyes. Jonathan came in from Neil’s office holding a milkcrate full of new movies, still wrapped in plastic. Neil whistled at him.

“Jonathan, do you think that girl likes me?” Neil shot Lucien a look as Jonathan answered.

“Oh yeah, 100% dude.”

“What, no! Jonathan, you were supposed to say no.” Neil spoke with his hands, slapping his hand against his face. Lucien chuckled and Jonathan looked between them, confused.

“What? Neil, did you want me to lie or something?” Jonathan put down the milkcrate and leaned against the checkout counter.

“He’s blissfully unaware of how much that girl likes him.” Lucien sucked on the empty pipe and coughed, swallowing his spit the wrong way.

“How? Neil, she comes by like twice a week to talk to you and shows up at all of our softball games.”

“She’s only nineteen! For all I know, she just wants a job here one day.” Neil shrugged and went back to stocking the shelves, a blush creeping into his high cheekbones.

“Sure she wants a job here if it means that she gets to fucking talk to you everyday, all day about classic films and shit!” Jonathan laughed.

“She’s nice!” Neil exclaimed defeatedly and massaged his eye sockets.

“Yeah, so’s my aunt but she doesn’t come around here every week to tell me about the latest movie she’s watched.” Lucien mumbled.

“That wasn’t as effective as you think it was,” Jonathan sighed, then just to Lucien, “don’t use a family member next time, ok?”

“Ok, OK!” Neil interrupted them, shaking his hands. “It’s not like that and she doesn’t like me like that. I’m like eight years older than her…”

“That’s never stopped people before,” Lucien reminded Neil and he withheld a few choice expletives as the shop door opened and a customer came in. The bell twinkled and Neil called out the familiar greeting.

“Welcome to Gumshoe Video!”

“Hi, Neil.” Y/N smiled shyly. Lucien and Jonathan’s quiet snickers stopped as a second customer entered after the girl. “This is Woody. Woody, this is Neil.”

“Hey, how’s it going?” Woody waved to Neil and his friends on the back couch. They waved back in shocked silence.

“What happened to you?” She asked, recoiling away from the employees who stared at her as if they’d seen a ghost. Neil blushed, still embarrassed.

“I was just not looking forward to telling you that we lost the copy of um, The Virgin Suicides that you wanted. It’ll take another few weeks and I assume that’s why you stopped by.” Neil scrambled for a reliable answer, and one that was partly true. She blushed slightly when she heard Neil use the word ‘virgin’ and laughed it off.

“It’s ok, I just wanted to show Woody my favorite place.”

“We’re going to get a movie,” Woody smiled and began to scan the shelves.

“Sooo what do you like? Classic horror, westerns, Spike Lee, Hitchcock, Coppola?” Neil listed off categories of films he viewed to be superior and Woody shook his head, oblivious to Neil’s edged tone.

“I like action movies mainly. I haven’t seen much else.”

Neil smiled at the girl’s embarrassed reaction. He knew well that she didn’t like action movies and refused to watch them even if Neil recommended one.

“So like war movies?”

“Sports movies.” Woody corrected and pretended to shoot a basketball. “Anything about football or basketball.”

Neil felt a sharp pain in his chest at the boy’s words. He was a walking abomination to the film community. Lucien made a sound similar to a whimper and Neil cleared his throat to mask it.

“Well uh i’m sure that we can find something for you though we don’t tend to carry sports movies because we have so little demand for it,” Neil explained blandly. “Have you ever seen anything by Tarentino? His movies tend to be more action-oriented. That and the old Bond movies.” Neil started to list movies he was almost completely sure Woody had not seen. Every shake of Woody’s head scratched a strange itch inside his head. What was this girl doing with someone like Woody?

“Ah maybe,” Woody shrugged. “Do you have Rudy, Bull Durham, Remember the Titans?”

“No, we don’t.” Neil pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled stiffly. “We do have the Air Bud movies,” Neil mumbled as a joke but Woody looked interested.

“Where’s that?” He asked, looking around the store.

“The kid’s section. It’s about a dog that plays sports,” Neil deadpanned and Jonathan and Lucien stifled their giggles.

Woody was completely oblivious to Neil’s pointed comment and shrugged.

“Sounds good to me,” he looked at the girl with a smile. Her lips were parted in a look of displeasure and shock.

“You want to watch Air Bud?” She stressed the name of the movie like a bad word. Woody smiled, still not catching the tone of dislike in her speech.

“Um…” She started and trailed off, totally caught off guard. Neil smiled, almost enjoying the direction that this interaction had gone.

“I’ll get it for you,” Neil used his best customer service voice and turned around. He widened his eyes at Jonathan and Lucien, I told you so. Lucien narrowed his eyes behind his glasses, not wanting to admit defeat just yet.

“Sooo are you two dating,” Lucien tried to sound casual but his tone was suggestive and Y/N blushed deeply from embarrassment.

“No, we’re just friends,” she answered too quickly and Neil glowered at Lucien. Jonathan looked down at his hands, wanting to stay out of the conversation. Woody looked at her and frowned.

“Well on that note, I think I’ll just get going. Forget about the movie, dude. Thanks anyway,” Woody snipped and left the store abruptly. The bell beside the door clanged loudly as he walked down the sidewalk, fumming.

“Lucien!” Neil exclaimed and Jonathan swatted Lucien’s arm.

“Sorry…geez!” Lucien deflected Jonathan’s hands and scooted away. Neil, holding a copy of Air Bud on VHS, lowered it and slid it onto the checkout counter.

“Sooo no more Air Bud?” Neil tried to break the awkward silence. She gave him a look that quieted him immediately and left the store, going the opposite way that Woody had turned. She went around the side of the building where she knew there was a shabby basketball goal and a place to sit. She wanted to wait it out, to make sure that she wouldn’t run into Woody again that afternoon. It was safer to hide here than walk home.

“Nice going, Lucien.” Neil sighed and returned the tape to the shelf.

“You just fucking ruined young love,” Jonathan quipped and Lucien gasped defensively. Neil joined them on the long section couch and they sat in silence for a while. A loud bang made them all jump.

“What the hell was that?” Jonathan turned to look where the sound had come from. The three of them stood to investigate. The second time they heard it, the shelf of tapes on the wall was josuled. They each jumped again and Neil drew his face up into a tight line.

“Is someone throwing something against the wall?” Lucien surmised and spoke with his pipe in his palm.

“I’ll check it out,” Neil looked at the shelf warily and backed away. He left the store and went around the side of the building. Seeing Y/N made him jump again and he clutched his chest briefly. She had a basketball and was chucking it at the hoop without much care for whether or not it went in. The ball hit the wall again. Jonathan and Lucien collected the tapes that had fallen off of the shelf only to have more tapes fall on their heads.

“Maybe you should watch more sports movies, it might help you with your technique.” Neil crossed his arms casually across his chest and smiled. She dribbled the basketball slowly and caught it in her arms.

“It was more of an exercise of rage,” she spoke between heavy breaths.

“Sorry about Lucien,” Neil gestured to the store. “He’s not great with people.”

“I could tell… but I’m not really upset about it-”

“You fooled me,” Neil interjected with a laugh. She rolled her eyes with a small smile.

“He gave me an out but it wasn’t the right time. I shouldn’t have said it like that to Woody.” She dribbled the basketball again.

“So were you dating?” Neil opened his hands, signaling her to throw him the ball.

“Kind of,” she tossed him the ball and shrugged, “we’d gone out once or twice. We met at a party. Nothing was official yet.” Neil aimed and threw the ball, it fell through the hoop with a quiet whoosh before bouncing on the pavement below. She retrieved the ball and with one hand, she fixed the legs of her shorts, pulling them down over her thighs. He looked away quickly.

“Did you know his taste in movies before you started going out?” Neil asked and watched as she aligned herself to toss the ball. It bounced off of the backboard and spun into the hoop. Neil applauded and she smiled.

“He said he liked action movies but I didn’t know that he meant… sports movies. He’s a business major and I doubt he’s ever taken a film class or seen anything that wasn’t about sports in some way.” She nearly shivered. “And you had to suggest Air Bud?” She asked him pointedly and he pursed his lips defensively.

“That was not an actual suggestion. I can’t believe he fell for it,” Neil dribbled the ball around his legs lazily and circled her before shooting. He missed and she giggled. “I think you dodged a bullet,” he told her honestly and when they held eye-contact, he felt his navel twitch.

“Could you imagine if I had to watch Air Bud on a date?” She looked down at the ball and missed the hoop by a few feet. She sighed and fanned herself. This is exactly what she had been hoping would happen. She wouldn’t go as far as to say that she was a mastermind but she’d been trying to get closer to Neil for weeks. She’d liked Woody enough but taking him to Gumshoe Video was more strategic than cute. She hoped to make Neil a little jealous, and show him that she could get other guys. Nothing had actually happened between her and Neil besides long chats and lots of laughter. Maybe she could change that.

Neil picked up the ball and bounded over to the hoop, jumping and shooting the ball. His fingers pushed the ball into the net as he landed back down on the ground. When he turned his eyes widened slightly.

“It’s really fucking hot today,” she mumbled as she pulled off her t-shirt, having just a camisole underneath. Her cutoff denim shorts and black camisole left little to the imagination but Neil still tried. She tossed the shirt to the side and dribbled the ball, her eyes focused on the goal. Neil looked down her camisole, staring at her chest as her breasts shifted beneath the fabric in her bra. Her pink bra straps slipped on her shoulders and after shooting the ball, she had to snap them back into place. He blushed more and looked away. She crossed the small makeshift court and sat on the shallow ledge beside the store, swinging her legs up and underneath her. Neil held the ball awkwardly in his hands and approached her slowly.

“What movie would you watch on a first date?” She asked him.

“Uh,” his mind blanked, “definitely Air Bud,” he nodded and she laughed. He sat beside her and shoved his hands into his pockets.

“Neil! I’m being serious!” She pressed the toe of her foot against her chest.

“Ok, ok ummm,” he wrapped his fingers around her bare ankle with a smile and moved it back to the ledge in between them. She shifted her body so that she was facing him, both feet planted on the ledge in front of him. “Maybe The Wizard of Oz.”

“Why?” She asked with a soft smile. He rocked back and forth, using his hands to support himself. His large hands sat on either side of her feet, his chest directly over her knees.

“Well it was one of the first movies to use color,” he said first, “and it would give me a chance to brag about how much I know about film.” He pursed his lips and raised his eyebrows. She laughed and shook her head.

“I thought you hated musicals!” She protested and he looked away sheepishly.

“I do but I can’t pass up an opportunity to impress someone, especially a girl.” He looked at her and then blushed, looking away again. “I mean,” he started and she nodded.

“No, I get it. Do you like romance movies?” She fluttered her lashes discreetly, making Neil second guess whether she had done it intentionally or not. “You don’t seem like one but we all have our secrets,” she dragged her hand up her leg, drawing his attention to the contours of muscle beneath her shin bone.

“You could argue that every movie is a romance,” Neil sputtered slightly, collecting himself.

“Even Air Bud?” She asked with a raised eyebrow and he scoffed, looking away.

“I don’t know about that.”

“What’s your favorite romance movie?” She rested her forearms on her knees and leaned forward. He looked at her briefly, his eyes dipping to her cleavage before meeting her eyes again.

“Uh w-what?” He asked and she giggled.

“What’s your favorite romance movie?” She asked again and he thought quickly.

“The Princess Bride,” his eyes flicked to her’s for approval and that surprised him.

“I love that movie,” her eyes widened as she recalled the plot.

“What about you?”

“Well The Princess Bride is the best answer but I like The Great Gatsby too,” she smiled shyly.

“The Great Gatsby is a tragedy at heart,” Neil argued and she shrugged.

“As you wish,” she quoted from The Princess Bride and his eyes flicked open wider for one second before he cleared his throat. The sun was starting to set and the sky bled with a sated orange color. She looked up at the sky, showing the vulnerable underside of her chin and swallowed. Neil watched, letting his eyes wander over the soft expanse of flesh.

“We should probably go inside,” Neil broke the silence, “or I-I should go back.” He jerked his thumb back to the store and she lowered her head again and let her head fall to one side.

“As you wish,” she said again and laughed. He watched her silently and licked his lips. He felt like he was going to say something but no words came to his mind as he sat there.

“Or do you want to come inside? Sorry, I’m not trying to get rid of you…”

“Ok, sure.” She nodded and followed him around the store, pulling on her big shirt again. Jonathan and Lucien were arguing inside but stopped when they walked inside.

“Basketball game?” Lucien asked over his pipe and Y/N nodded with a sigh.

“Sorta, I had to blow off some steam.”

“He’s sorry by the way,” Jonathan added and Lucien started to argue but she cut them off.

“It’s ok. You saved me a night watching Air Bud.” She winked and started to browse the aisles again. Jonathan shoved Lucien.

“What? What’s your problem?” Lucien protested and Jonathan gestured to the door, hinting that they should leave. “You have to be joking,” he muttered under his breath, irritated.

“Hey uh, Neil?” Jonathan cleared his throat. Neil broke his obvious concentration on the girl and looked at his friends on the couch.

“Yeah?”

“We’re gonna head out. Lucien owes me a beer and I want to beat the bar rush,” Jonathan grabbed Lucien by the shoulders and shuffled out the front door.

“It’s not even seven yet-” Neil started but they were gone before he could finish. His heart started beating quickly and he glanced anxiously at the disappearing silhouettes of his friends. The girl walked through the aisles, biting her bottom lip slightly as she looked. He didn’t want to be alone like this with her, it felt weird. She was young enough to be his younger sister and it irked him… and yet, she looked so pretty beneath the yellowish fluorescent bulbs inside the store and her hair was sticky from the humidity.

“We should watch something,” she said quietly behind a rack of VHS and Neil cleared his throat.

“Together?”

“No, in separate rooms… yeah of course together.” She laughed lightly and showed him the movie she had found. He chuckled and shrugged.

“The Princess Bride? Ok, sure.” He approached the small box tv in front of the sectional couch and inserted the tape. Y/N slipped discreetly to the front doors and turned over the ‘open’ sign to ‘closed’ and locked the door. Neil stood behind the couch and set up the box player, struggling with the buttons on the remote. She collapsed on the couch and rested her legs on the wide ottoman. Her hair spread over the back of the couch and covered Neil’s hand. He looked down at it and struggled to exhale normally. The movie started and she wiggled in excitement. Neil sat on a stool behind the couch, worried about sitting beside her. After the first ten minutes of them each reciting the lines back to the tv, she looked over her shoulder, flashing a toothy grin.

“Neil, come on, sit with me. It’s weird to have you looking over my shoulder like that.”

“Um I- uh yeah ok,” Neil stammered and joined her hesitantly on the couch, his hands between his knees. His longer hair brushed the tops of his shoulders and she resisted the urge to sweep a strand into her hand. Slowly he relaxed and they acted to each other as well as to the tv, adapting the characters they liked best. As the movie went on, she braved looking over at him more and holding his startling eye contact. They laughed hard at one scene and bent over with laughter, shifting their bodies closer in the process. Eventually they were nearly arm-to-arm on the worn brown sectional. Neil’s breath escaped in pained bursts as he looked at her thigh, relaxed on the couch beside his leg. Her shorts had creeped up to her crotch as they sat and she’d made no move to pull them back down. He caught himself staring at the crease at her crotch and wondering if the tightness was uncomfortable for her, how warm the material would be against her like that… he shook his head to clear his thoughts and clenched his jaw when he felt his cock twitch.

“Neil?” She turned slightly to him and his breath hitched as he turned his attention to her. She bit her lip lightly and slowly pressed herself up onto her knee. He watched her, his eyes flicking between the tv and her face, inches from his face.

Hear this now: I will always come for you.

She exhaled softly and her breath rippled across his face. Her hands inched closer to his stomach clothed beneath his light blue shirt. Her bright eyes intoxicated him as she brought her lips to his, offering herself. When she kissed him, her eyes squeezed closed and she sucked briefly on his bottom lip, lacking technique from her barely nonexistent experience. When she pulled away slowly Neil’s brow creased as his brows flew up.

“Y/N… we uh we shouldn’t.”

But how can you be sure?

Her eyes crinkled in embarrassment and her small cheeks flushed. “Oh, I’m sorry,” she whispered and sat back against the couch, pressing her sweaty palms against her thighs. Neil looked over at her and licked his lips, fighting an internal argument against himself.

This is true love- you think this happens everyday?

She flexed her thighs anxiously on the couch and the movement sent a shock up Neil’s body, making his crotch throb slightly, weary from the close proximity to her warm skin.

You mock my pain.

Neil brushed a shaky finger down the side of her thigh and felt her inhale quickly. She looked at him slowly, her lips parted. His hand slid up her body to her head and cupped her cheek. He leaned over and kissed her, not harshly but not subtle either. Their lips popped wetly when he pulled away. He looked down at her, she was panting slightly, her heart fluttering in her chest.

“I shouldn’t have done that,” Neil whispered and fell back into the couch beside her, clenching his fists. They sat in silence, their breath mingling in the space between them like a mixture of heat waves. Neil smelled faintly of mint mouthwash and musk, the sweat worked up during their “game” clung to his body.

Life is pain, princess. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

And quick as a flash of lightning, their bodies flew together, their mouths finding each other like opposite ends of a magnet or a cap over a pen. She climbed onto his lap, straddling his hips and held his head in her small hands. He wrapped his arms around her waist, bunching the fabric in his hands. Her tongue slipped into his mouth and he greeted it with enthusiasm, his hands tightening around her waist. She licked his lips as she closed down around them, sucking everything out of him. He moaned softly against her kiss and his arms flexed, his cock hardening. She gasped when she felt him get hard against her crotch. He broke their kiss abruptly.

“Fuck, sorry.” He loosened his grip on her waist and went to shift out from under her. “I didn’t mean to get…” he trailed off and moved her off his lap easily. She watched him, her mind already caught in a lapse.

“This was a mistake. You’re in college. I shouldn’t have encouraged this,” he dragged his hands through his dark hair and pulled at the roots, mumbling incoherently as she looked up at him, her eyes wide like a doe. The front of his pants tented out and he started to walk to his office. She jumped and grabbed his hand, catching him before he disappeared into the backroom.

“Please, stay.” She whispered and bit her lip, dispelling some of her pent up energy into the action.

“You’re too young.”

“I’m nineteen.”

“I’m too old for you.”

“You’re 27.”

“You’re a virgin.”

She flushed redder and looked away, embarrassed. “Not really.” She looked back at him and shrugged. “We all have our secrets, right?” She cocked her head and tried to smile, her heart beating so fast that she felt dizzy.

“I don’t know…” Neil added half-heartedly, having run out of reasons. “The customers!” Neil remembered and glanced, panicked, at the front doors.

“You closed early.” She smiled embarrassedly and rubbed his wrist with her thumb. “Please,” she tried again and he looked down at her. His cock throbbed uncomfortably in his pants. He allowed her to lead him back to the couch and watched as she lowered herself onto her knees. Her hands rested on his thighs as she opened his legs wide enough to sit between them. He watched dumbly as she unbuckled his belt and slowly unzipped his fly. She tugged down the crotch of his jeans, exposing the waistband of his checkered boxers.

“Wait,” Neil blurted and she looked up at him, “come here.” He asked softly and waited as she rose to her feet, her hands moving to his chest as she leaned closer. He pulled her back onto his lap, straddling her over his lap and kissed her, lapping at her mouth with his tongue. His small biceps flexed around her, his hands finding her hair and wrapping his fingers in it hungrily. She sat up on her knees and pressed her crotch against his chest, making him sit up taller to reach her mouth. She whimpered softly as he kissed her as if he was eating her, slowly getting deeper. His kisses felt so good on their own that she almost moaned into him, licking the tip of his nose. She licked the edge of his jaw and he let her, savoring the immature way she approached tasting him. His hands supported her back as she panted, bucking her hips against his chest as she kissed him feverishly. Racks of tapes shielded them from view but Neil hoped passerbys couldn’t hear them through the storefront’s display glass.

Slowly she slid down his chest and returned to her spot between his legs. She licked the warm mound at his crotch, leaving a wide wet spot. Neil sighed as he watched her, his cock twitched again. Her hands squeezed into his thighs and she licked his erection again through his boxers.

“Oh god,” Neil gasped and looked up at the ceiling. She hooked her hands around his waistband and pulled it down slowly, finally releasing his cock which glistened with precum. She stared at it for a moment before kissing the head. Neil’s mouth fell open in pleasure and shock. “Look at you, god… fuck.” She smiled, self-conscious and wrapped her hand around the base of his cock, squeezing him slightly. He groaned and bucked his hips. She rubbed the head against her wet lips and slowly slipped him inside her mouth. Her mouth was already watering and he whined loudly as she took him in, hallowing her cheeks on accident but soon realizing that it made Neil feel good. She went as deep as she could and pulled away, allowing a thick line of spit to connect her lips with his cock. Neil’s eyes widened and his head dropped back against the couch. His hands flew up to his face and massaged his cheeks, unsure how to handle the things he was feeling and not wanting to force her head down on top of him.

She took him back into her mouth and swirled her tongue around him, bobbing her head up and down. She rocked her head slightly and tried to create a rhythm that elicited the most pitiful sounds from Neil. His cock shook inside her mouth and she sucked hard against it like a lollipop. Neil’s hands tightened around his face and he moaned loudly, exhaling sharply.

“Oh god, honey. What the actual fuck.” He whined between even breaths. He looked down at her pretty little mouth sucking him off and he nearly finished then when she pulled off of him and started to jack him off, her tongue pressed flat against his head. Her fist clenched around his length and he sputtered, unable to form words. After a dozen hard and fast jerks, she took him in her mouth again and bobbed up and down quickly, drooling heavily around him as she tasted his salty precum.

“Oh fuck- fuck- fuck! Shit, I’m gonna cum.” He panted and moaned loudly, his hands finally finding her hair, the pleasure becoming so overwhelming that it was almost painful. The friction and sensation heightened and his knuckles turned white around her long hair. He thrusted his hips gently into her mouth, not wanting to gag her. She welcomed it, opening her throat and humming to let him deeper. She breathed deeply through her nose and her exhales feathered across his crotch, adding even more to the sensations he was already feeling. With a yell Neil spilled into her mouth, bucking his hips and falling back on the couch. She proudly continued to suck him off, pulling everything out of him. He watched her, breathing heavily. She swallowed his warm cum with a smile.

I told you I would come for you…

Neil glanced up at the movie screen and chuckled. She licked him from the base up and plopped back onto the couch, breathing heavily too. Neil tucked himself back into his pants, leaving his belt unbuckled. She arranged herself proudly beside him on the couch, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

“That was fucking incredible,” Neil slapped his forehead and laughed breathlessly. “So so good…” he shook his head and looked at her, smiling lopsidedly. She snaked a hand onto his crotch again and rubbed him before wrapping her arm around his sweaty neck. He wrapped his arms around her and supported her body weight as she laid against him, their stomach crushed against each other. She shivered as she heard his heavy breath against her ear. “Good girl,” he whispered and sighed. He rubbed her back and kissed her shoulder through her shirt. She turned over, sitting nearly on his lap. His hands clasped around her stomach and held her tightly. Her soft belly shivered beneath her slowing breaths. They both relaxed again into the movie.

#cillian x fem!reader #cillian murphy #fanfiction #cillian fluff #cillian fanfic #neil lewis x fem!reader #neil lewis x y/n #neil lewis smut #neil lewis x reader #neil lewis #watching the detectives #princess bride

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david-talks-sw · 1 year

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When a Star Wars writer engages with the material but not the narrative.

I'm writing a long post about the Jedi and the clone troopers and there's a whole section that I had to remove because it was too long:

Karen Traviss' take on the Jedi and the clones.

I already wrote about why Karen Traviss' take on the Jedi and Yoda doesn't track with what George Lucas had established in his narrative of the Prequels. Since then, I've been able to do more research.

It's no secret that one of the reasons Traviss listed for criticizing the Jedi in the Expanded Universe books she wrote is their treatment of the clones (or at least what she understood it to be).

In 2008, she wrote a now-deleted blog post about it (it was really long, so I'm only including the part relevant to my point, if you want the full context you can look it up, this is old stuff).

So if you ask me, in the above quote, Traviss is essentially doing the equivalent of saying:

"Batman is a psycho elitist who beats up the mentally ill and indoctrinates kids, turning them into child soldiers for his unending crazy vigilante war on crime, and if you can't recognize that then you scare the living crap out of me."

Like... you can argue that, and a couple of comics have argued that.

But by and large, the general consensus is that Batman is a superhero, the Robins are his sons and daughter, and the "mentally ill" are in fact the Joker and Two-Face aka mass murderers.

So if you make that argument, that's you applying your real-life values and conclusions to a narrative that deliberately doesn't acknowledge those points, in-universe, in order to tell the story it wants to tell.

It's counting on your suspension of disbelief, defined as "the avoidance—often described as willing—of critical thinking and logic in understanding something that is unreal or impossible in reality, such as something in a work of speculative fiction, in order to believe it for the sake of enjoying its narrative."

The Jedi accepting the clones and the clones being slaves isn't a "delicate point". It's barely a point at all!

It's never addressed in the film (because of course it isn't, the Prequels are about Anakin and the Republic, not the clones).

It's only addressed once by Slick, an unreliable narrator, in The Clone Wars.

That's it. Hell, in 2008, when The Clone Wars writer Henry Gilroy was asked to comment on the relationship between clones and Jedi, he explicitly said he'd "rather not get into" that particular point.

I recently got Mythmaking: Behind the Scenes of 'Attack of the Clones' and nowhere is that detail touched on by Lucas at any point.

Nobody wants to touch on that point with a 10ft pole, because it's not relevant to the story.

So while Traviss acknowledges the Jedi are fictional characters, she doesn't follow that thread through to the end by acknowledging that fictional characters don't have free will, they must abide by the story and the whim of the writer.

She's engaging with the material, but refusing to engage with the narrative. She's having her cake and eating it too.

My reason for saying all this is that in the book Star Wars on Trial, she elaborates on her thought process upon discovering this detail.

Shortly before to this, she acknowledges twice that she knew nothing about Star Wars, beside seeing the original films in her youth.

Another writer who saw the new films and saw Mace Windu argue against there being a war...

... the worry on his face at the prospect of the Jedi being thrown at the Separatists...

... and the sheer melancholy on Yoda's face upon announcing the Clone War had begun...

... might have instead wondered how the Jedi, so opposed to war, could've ended up being generals.

Because while we don't see the Jedi openly protest the use of the clones in the film... they're not exactly giddy about it, either. All they can do is watch powerlessly as it gets voted by the Senate.

"The Jedi are there. But the Jedi aren't really allowed to be involved in the political process. They're there, but they can't suddenly step up and say, "No, no. You can't do that." They have to let the political process go." - George Lucas, Attack of the Clones, Commentary #2, 2002

We also don't see them take on the role of generals, either.

We only see them begrudgingly lead troops on Geonosis, specifically.

But they're not referred to as "generals" yet.

Another writer might have imagined a scene where after Geonosis, Mace Windu talks to Palpatine thinking the Jedi will go back to their roles as diplomats, and that what we saw in Attack of the Clones was a one-time thing to save Obi-Wan, but Palpatine politely goes:

"Ha! No. Didn't you hear? The Senate was so impressed by your performance on Geonosis that they voted to make you all generals in the GAR. Now, get back to the front."

Another writer might've elected to write them having that "big moral debate" she mentions.

Instead, Traviss immediately jumps on the "Jedi are elitists" train.

Because her personal experience with the military makes her sympathize with the clones and her personal belief is that - while the story may frame the Jedi as "the good guys" - nobody is that good a guy, real life people aren't that pure and selfless. There's gotta be something off about them and aHA! That's what it is!

That's her choosing to take that line of thought instead of one more in-line with the story, because she perceives it as unrealistic. But like... Star Wars isn't real life, it's a fairy tale.

That's like saying:

"The hunter in Little Red Riding Hood commits animal cruelty by cutting the Wolf open. He should've let nature take its course, the wolf earned that meal fair and square. If you think the hunter should've saved Red Riding Hood and her Grandma, then clearly you're the kind of monster who thinks one life is worth more than others."

... no?

The story's narrative clearly portrays the wolf as the villain of the tale and frames the Hunter saving Red Riding Hood as a good thing.

Disagreeing with that narrative is absolutely fine, but anybody who acknowledges the wolf is the bad guy in the story isn't automatically an animal hater and/or a bad person. Just because you say "the wolf is the villain" doesn't mean that you think that, in real life, killing wolves for shits and giggles is good.

Conversely, the narrative of the Prequels asks you to suspend your disbelief and not consider the implications that having a clone army entails. Because the use of clones doesn't have a direct impact on either Anakin or the Senate's stories.

Edit: I finished the post this one here originally spun out of!

You can find it here:

#Karen Traviss #clone troopers #jedi order #in defense of the jedi

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topguncortez · 11 months

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The First Kick | Rooster & Dragon

Opposites Attract Masterlist | Main Masterlist

synopsis: aviators hate rainy days, but slasher films and baby bumps make them a little more enjoyable

word count: 500

warnings: pregnancy

There was one thing that aviators hated, and that was rain. Luckily living in California, they only had a rainy day like twice a year. When they woke up this morning, Dragon and Rooster didn’t even bother to start getting ready. They cuddled under the covers and waited for the text from Mav to come in that they had the day off.

The rain fell softly against the skylight in their living room. Usually on rainy days, it meant finishing projects around the house that had been abandoned, but today’s rainy day seemed to drain the energy right out of Dragon. The pregnancy had slowly started to get better. She wasn’t as sick all the time, but she was exhausted.

Bradley often found her asleep with her head on her desk in the middle of the day, or curled on the couch in the ready room. So today, Bradley dragged her to the couch and cuddled her with almost every fuzzy blanket that they had in the house. She is currently laid in between Bradley’s legs, her back resting against his chest. He absent-mindedly drew circles over her bump, which seemed to be growing daily, as she watched Scream.

“Anthony Perkins, Psycho,” Dragon quoted and Bradley chuckled.

“How many times have you seen this?” He asked, and Dragon just shrugged, “Gonna turn our baby into a slasher movie psycho.”

“Now, Bradley, don’t you blame the movies,” She turned in his arms, so she was straddling him, “‘Movies don’t create psychos, movies make psychos more creative’, Billy Loomis, Scream 1996,” Dragon said, her lips ghosting over him.

“Yeah, yeah, words, words,” Bradley said and sealed the gap between them. The moment their lips touched, Dragon gasped and pulled away, her eyes going down to her belly, “Did you feel that too?”

“I’ve been feeling that. Did you feel that?” Dragon asked and Bradley nodded.

“Did they just kick?” He asked his eyes wide like a kid in a candy store. And to answer his own question, there was another nudge against his hand, “Oh my god! Honey, they kicked! The baby kicked!”

“I know,” Dragon smiled, and placed a hand on his cheek, “I’ve been feeling these like flutters for the past two weeks, I can’t believe you haven’t felt them. You’re almost always touching my bump.”

“Is it weird that I’m jealous of that?” He asked. Dragon ran her thumb over the apple of his cheek.

“No, it’s not,” Dragon said, “But trust me, if you felt the way they hit my rib cage. . . jealousy would be over and done.”

Bradley shook his head and pushed her (his) sweatshirt up so her bare belly was exposed to him. His new favorite thing as of late was to touch Dragon’s bare skin, it was the closest he could get to feeling the baby for right now. Bradley gently pushed on her belly, his eyes going to meet hers.

“Is this okay?” He asked and Dragon nodded, “Hi baby,” Bradley whispered to her bump, “Can you show us your new trick again?” He waited a moment and felt a soft nudge against his hand, “So cool, so very cool,” Bradley smiled.

And that’s how most of the afternoon went. They switched positions so Bradley was laying in between Dragon's legs. He snuggled up with Dragon’s bump, his face resting gently on it. Every time he felt a kick, he would place a kiss right on the spot where the little one touched.

Dragon didn’t know how she could fall more in love with Bradley Bradshaw, but this moment proved that she could.

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piglet26 · 5 months

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Reylo. Sorry, but it's not abusive

Star Wars is not selling abusive relationships to young girls nor conditioning them into aspiring to them. Reylo is not propaganda from disgruntled single middle aged woman. It wasn't promoting abusive relationships when Luke still found love for his father despite Darth Vader cutting off his hand. Luke fans, young and old, were not attacked as being dumb or needy for liking Luke or how he viewed his father. It damn sure wasn't considered abusive when Anakin choked Padme and she still held hope for him in her heart. Or, that Obi-Wan still held a love for Anakin despite everything Darth Vader had done. Then there was Reylo.

Being a Reylo is not something I feel I need to defend. Let me love what I love in peace. That's what I believe. I did not actually see any of the sequel trilogy until after it was concluded. I was not on any fandoms during the rollout and marketing for the films. Thank God. However, I have gathered enough to understand it was horrible how Reylos were being regarded. It was beyond patronizing. I'm not new to fandom, hell I've been on soap opera fandoms for quite some time and believe me that's a savage space, but wow.

I want to clarify some of the feedback against Reylo and reaffirm why it's such a compelling pairing. Further more, I regard it as an compelling attribute to the Star Wars universe that only added to the franchise.

Now I've seen the domination of woman twisted up and called romance (see Twilight and 50 Shades of Gray), but I don't think people understand WHY those relationship were as such. Rey, on her own, is one of the strongest and most badass female leads to ever appear on the big screen. Despite people thinking she doesn't have a personality she is a resourceful, tough, innocent, loyal, hopeful and strong. She has agency unlike Bella Swan. She is not sexualized by Kylo Ren unlike the 50 shades girl. Her gender is neither a hindrance nor an advantage. She has the agency to save herself, but she is also saved.

Which is really one of the main issues. There is the patronization of Rey as a character, the people who like her and the people who like the pairing. While those 50 shades of gray books didn't buy themselves rather than listening to why Reylos liked the pairing they were told why they did and then dismissed. Or, there's the men that wanted Rey to be with Finn because Finn was the "nice guy" who they identified with.

Rey doesn't need a love interest - not all heroines need love interests, but why does it imply she's weak if she does have a love interest? Heroes infamously have a female counterpart which helps make them viable. It doesn't make them any less interesting as an individual.

Kylo Ren and Rey are NOT a couple but instead representatives of opposing sides in a war. This is the most important part. From the get-go they have an intense dynamic. Both have had visions and dreams of the other and they recognize something in one another. Kylo Ren did kidnap Rey, however, if you consider fighting your enemies “abusive” or interrogating war prisoners as “domestic violence”.............well, that is odd.

As quotes about them

What if your soulmate in the Force was your enemy? Circumstance, pits them against each other, but the Force bonds them together. They understand each other almost from a point of view of fate. And yet, fate has made them enemies.

While Kylo Ren is fascinated by In the moments of the interrogation, gender and sexuality have nothing to do with Kylo’s actions. J.J. made the conscious choice to show us the same scene twice (Kylo Ren interrogating his enemies) so the audience can spot the differences between the two. Sorry J.J, you trusted people too much.

We're able to see very clear aggression and abuse come from Kylo Ren for Poe. He has zero interest in him personally. He needs information and he will get it. The force and his ability to read someone's mind is a tool within his disposal. Now why isn't Poe's interrogation considered sexual assault?

"You know I can take anything I want" HE CAN READ HER MIND! He's not talking about raping her for God's Sake! He asked her to freely provide information and she didn't want to. However, he has a tool to use against a girl adding his enemies - a tool he'll use if she doesn't want to snitch. She knows this he already read her mind - so why not give the information freely?!

Rey also invaded his mind, so did she mind-rape him too?

The line that fans almost never seem to talk about in The Force Awakens is when Kylo says to Rey “Don’t be afraid, I feel it too.” What did he feel? The best I'm able to understand is what they felt was their force dyad igniting or fulfilling.

Ren becomes personally invested in Rey. Not with her cause, or her affiliation with the Resistance, but with her and what he wants from her.

“Kylo chased Finn and Rey outside Starkiller Base to fight them! He threw Rey against a tree!” Well she was going to shoot him..... I would've thrown her against a tree to save myself. His issue in that moment was Finn. Finn was the "traitor" in questioned and his unfinished business. They fought, but really it was a dueling exercise. Kylo Ren wanted to test her skills and her powers. If he wanted her dead there was a convenient edge to push her over, hell he offered to teach her. Rey was the one to go ape and almost kill him.

Again, I'm not implying that they aren't messy - they are. For literary nerds this is why they are a compelling heroine/villain. Ultimately one will greatly affect the other. The tension in between them is why it's great.

Ben Solo, least we forget, is himself an abuse victim. This is canon. While Kylo Ren has learned abusive techniques, they are at war. Applying abusive characteristics to a fictional character in a war setting without any attempt to incorporate the story is bizarre. Why was he able for the first time to stand against his abuser? Rey. He couldn't stand up for himself but he stood up for her. Ultimately, Kylo Ren wanted to 'break the wheel" that's what he claimed. If he was honest, he'd admit he had no clue of how to do that.

Most abusers are charming and irresistible when you first meet them. Ben has NEVER dishonest with Rey about who he is. Rey is very aware of the horrible side of him and even refers to him as a monster. He affirms her accusation that he is a monster.

During their force bonds because of the nature of the bond Rey is in a position to hear him out and try to understand how he became the monster he is today. When she learns that he didn't become this on his own, that Luke, his parents and Snoke contributed to his downfall she had hope in him. It's also important to make the distinctions that when she has a vision of him, it's as Ben. It's like a bipolar personality. When Kylo Ren goes all Darcy marriage proposal - she reject him. She rightfully spurned him when he resorted to cruelty to sway her to his side. Rey turned down Kylo as long as he was the ’bad guy’, and only kissed him as Ben ’the good guy’.

“He only wants to use her for her power.” Oversimplification that Rey is actually guilty of. Kylo Ren is lonely and within Rey he finds not only an equal but the most intense emotional connection he's ever had. The most intense connection she's ever had. Let's not forget they are probably both virgins. Then they are in each other's head. That's intense. When Kylo makes his plea to Rey it's out of not only loneliness but truly wanting her for her.

Also, Kylo doesn’t say he wants them to rule together as “master and apprentice”. He wants Rey to be his empress, his queen which is what Rey means. He’s literally proposing by offering her the entire galaxy. Ultimately Reylos see them as two equally powerful archenemies dedicating themselves to defeating the other but also find themselves strangely drawn to each other in ways they might not want to admit. Then two soul mates on the other side of a conflict.

This is built on the idea that hate itself is a sort of twisted form of love. It is, or, rather hatred is born from things like fear, pain, betrayal and love. Their connection is complicated. One minutes they last out at one another and the next they lean into each other. People can regard this as toxic. Others, like myself, regard this as the gray side of love. Reylo represent the yin yang of the force. The light and the dark craving each other and finding themselves frustrated.

Notice how many hero/villains find themselves telling others that only they are allowed to kill/harm their nemesis, in a subconscious effort to protect their nemesis from others. And they may also get strangely jealous when their nemesis fights other people.

Other people give this argument because they believe the popularity of antiheroes in media is a sign of society’s moral decay. The First Order for all we know is not a fascist society. We have no idea the ideology of the First Order. We know their clothing was inspired by the Nazis.

Red String of Fate: the two connected by the red thread are destined lovers, regardless of place, time, or circumstances. This magical cord may stretch or tangle, but never break

Kylo Ren and Rey BOTH want to be together, believe in the other, but are held back by their individual idea of what means. How is that abusive?! Maybe it's back to thinking little girls won't be able to understand the complexity of Reylo. Huh, well little boys can understand the complexity of Batman and Joker. If little boys are smart enough to realize the difference between fiction and reality and are able to watch a love/hate relationship between a good guy and a bad guy, I’m pretty sure the girls can handle it too. Rey has hope and belief that Kylo Ren can be good, she won't stay by his side while he's doing bad.

What is Reylo? In a way. Iconic

#reylo #star wars #rey star wars #ben solo #rey skywalker #kylo x rey #finnrey #kylo ren #ben solo deserved better #ben solo x rey #rey palpatine #rey #reylo au #star wars fanart #disney star wars

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antianakin · 4 months

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@theneutralmime

I've gone over a lot of my thoughts on the sequels in my responses to the last two asks you've sent me about them, so I'm going to skip ahead to my thoughts on Luke at this point since I think my feelings on the Sequels in general are pretty clear. I'm glad you enjoyed them, but I've seen the entire trilogy through twice now and I WAS trying to be more generous the second time around to see if my opinion would change and it uh. Didn't. I still don't like them and I still find them a massive mess of squandered potential.

Luke's quotes about the Jedi in the sequels (which are really ONLY in TLJ, he never has anything bad to say about them in TROS) are pretty clearly intended to be seen as symptoms of Luke being traumatized and letting that pain and loss and fear consume him to the point that he's placing the blame on an easy target rather than actually acknowledging what happened and how he feels about it and the part he played in it. Luke in TLJ is hiding from his fears, hiding from his own reality, refusing to step up and do what needs to be done and face his own mistakes. So he turns to "the Jedi were weak and need to die" as a way of basically excusing the choices he's currently making. He's not RIGHT, the things he tells Rey aren't TRUE, and that's the whole point behind his arc in TLJ. His last words are to say that he won't be the last Jedi, and he's clearly not upset by that, he says it like it's a TRIUMPH, which indicates that he no longer believes the Jedi need to all die out. Even earlier, he's upset about losing the Jedi texts, indicating that even though he was arguing for the Jedi to die and about to burn them himself, he didn't ACTUALLY believe any of those things he said or want the things he said he wanted, he was just desperately trying to convince himself that he did because it was easier than doing the emotional work of facing what he'd done wrong.

I will say that I think this was a ridiculous and foolish arc for Luke to even HAVE, I think it's unfortunate that most of Luke's screentime in this trilogy is dedicated to him bashing the Jedi and blaming them for their own genocide, and I don't think that the storyline is handled very well in general. But the point of the story IS that Luke is wrong and the Jedi SHOULDN'T die out, so, you know, credit where credit is due here.

Getting into your question about the Jedi, though. I THINK you're asking me what the Jedi actually DO. Which, fair question, it's not something they discuss very much in the films or show (and the show is focused on them during war which makes it harder to figure out what they'd normally be doing during peacetime). I imagine there's a LOT of things the Jedi probably did before the war, it wasn't one job that they all did. But the general idea I got is that the Jedi work as a branch of the Republic Senate that can be called upon to provide aid like treaty mediation and conflict resolution for planets and systems that ask for it. I'll list off as many examples as I can think of where we see Jedi doing work that isn't related to the war in high canon.

In TPM, Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon are sent to try to NEGOTIATE with the Trade Federation about the blockade of Naboo, but they end up having to quickly adjust when the Trade Federation tries to kill them and sends in armed forced to INVADE Naboo.

Once that happens, their primary goal switches to getting Naboo's leader to Coruscant so she can make her case and plead for aid directly to the Senate because it just became a LOT bigger than two Jedi could actually do anything about.

In AOTC, it's mentioned that Obi-Wan and Anakin just got back from some kind of border dispute.

In TCW, Obi-Wan mentions that he spent a year on the run with Satine during the Mandalorian civil war, presumably called in by Satine's father to just... protect her until the war was over and Satine could take up peaceful leadership or something.

In TCW season 7, Trace and Rafa sort-of imply that the Jedi used to do a lot more work ON CORUSCANT to help poorer people on the lower levels.

Also in TCW, we hear that the Jedi once managed to basically overthrow the Zyggerian slave empire, something the Zyggerians still hold against them.

In TOTJ (if we choose to take that as canon), we see Dooku and Qui-Gon sent to help resolve a dispute where a senator's son has been kidnapped by his people (Dooku ends up siding with the kidnappers when he realizes why they did what they did and how corrupt the senator has become).

In AOTC again, we see Obi-Wan and Anakin act as bodyguards for Padme when an assassin comes after her.

We also routinely see the Jedi doing their own investigations that seem completely independent of the Senate, like Obi-Wan going off to find Kamino and Jango. When he makes his reports, he is clearly reporting directly to the Council, not the Senate or the Chancellor. During TCW, we see Plo Koon, Obi-Wan, and Anakin get involved in an investigation into the clones' creation and Sifo-Dyas's involvement in it and reported death, something that clearly isn't being run by the Chancellor or the Senate.

So what do the Jedi do? They keep the peace, whether that means acting as a temporary bodyguard for a planetary leader, taking down slave empires, or negotiating treaties and conflicts of varying kinds. Presumably, before Palpatine took power, the Jedi had enough time and independence that they were able to do a lot more work of their own that didn't necessarily directly involve the Senate, too, which could be anything from investigating corruption in the galaxy to providing aid and services to the poorer populations on planets in the Republic.

I don't think it's made clear whether the Jedi actively SEARCH for Force sensitive children or if they're just so established as a group that they're often MADE AWARE of Force sensitive children by parents calling for help somehow. That list they have of children is of presumably people whose parents have said maybe or not yet (rather than parents who have firmly said no) because I believe Mace refers to the holocron as the future of the Order. These are children who could potentially become Jedi or who are PLANNING to become Jedi but whose parents wanted to wait a year or something. This doesn't indicate to me that the Jedi actively sought them out, but that these were probably children whose parents sought out the Jedi themselves when it became clear their child was Force sensitive. We see something like this happen in TOTJ when Ahsoka disappears off with a massive wild cat and comes back RIDING said wild cat and the entire village is made abruptly aware that she's Force sensitive and meant to be a Jedi. If the Jedi come and confirm those suspicions, but the parents are uncertain or just explicitly ask for more time, the Jedi seem inclined to give it to them (up to a point, presumably, they obviously usually don't accept kids over a certain age so they can't wait forever).

The reason the Jedi have that rule about training children early is because the Jedi lifestyle requires certain sacrifices that can be difficult to adjust to if you weren't raised in it. For a lot of people, their friends and family are always going to be their first priority because they care about them more than any random stranger. And this is totally fine, this is natural and normal. The Jedi cannot do that, though. They can't prioritize the people they care about above their duty to the galaxy at large. This is the promise they make by choosing to be Jedi and it is generally incompatible with the promises you make to people like spouses and children (this is for a myriad of reasons like the amount of time a Jedi would have to spend doing work vs being with their family and the ways this would ultimately impact their relationships with people who are relying on them). The Jedi have to be willing to sacrifice the people they love for the greater good if it becomes necessary. And while the children who are raised among the Jedi can still ultimately decide this lifestyle isn't for them and walk away from it (and can do this at any age, even after they've made their oaths and become an adult), it's a lot EASIER to life this way if you ARE raised in it from a young age and don't already have a bunch of connections with other people to overcome.

This is why Anakin struggles so much. He was raised with his mother until he was nine and so he has this connection with her where the two of them were always going to be more important to each other than anybody else. That's just how that relationship worked and that's fine. But when he became a Jedi, Anakin had to stop thinking of his mother as more important than anybody else, and he CAN'T. He ultimately abandons his duty as a Jedi, his duty to protect Padme, in order to go protect Shmi because Shmi is more important to him than anyone else. Had Padme gotten assassinated as a result of him abandoning that duty, it could've had some repercussions for a lot of people, but Anakin DOES NOT CARE because Shmi is more important. And of course, we see him then make the exact same mistake with Padme herself after Shmi is dead. He prioritizes Padme above everyone else because he legitimately just CANNOT live any other way, he CANNOT not prioritize Padme more than everyone else, ESPECIALLY when she is his wife, and he ultimately is willing to sacrifice the Jedi, the clones, and the Republic to save her.

We even see him blatantly TELL Padme this in TCW where he says that ideals are important, but they'll never be more important to him than how he FEELS about Padme. He clearly tells Padme that he EXPECTS her to prioritize him as her husband more than once, something Padme usually TRIES to push back on but ultimately usually capitulates to. Even Padme ends up getting jealous and upset once when Anakin can't stay the night with her upon returning from the war because he has to go make a report to the Council. Padme and Anakin have clear expectations of each other as husband and wife that seem to be in contradiction to what their respective careers require of them that cause them distress in their relationship more than once.

Anakin struggles with this and my personal interpretation of Anakin is that he'd ALWAYS have struggled with this because he wants to be able to prioritize the people he loves, even before it gets to the point where he's willing to murder millions of people to do it. His desires are just incompatible with the way the Jedi choose to live, but if he'd been adopted by the Jedi before he was old enough to really make that kind of connection, he'd have had an easier time managing that because he just wouldn't necessarily have ever HAD those kinds of desires. He would've grown up learning about love and family in a very different way that would allow him to prioritize his duty to the galaxy because he WANTS to prioritize his duty to the galaxy and no one person would be more important than that. But in canon, Anakin WANTS to be able to prioritize the people he cares about, more than anything else this is what he wants. And he wants those same people to also prioritize HIM in return (it's one of the reasons his relationship with Obi-Wan is both one of his healthiest ones, because Obi-Wan refuses to do this and expects the same of Anakin, but also one of the ones most easily discarded and replaced because Anakin knows that Obi-Wan will never give him what he wants).

So yes, it's GOOD that the Jedi insist on training their children early because it helps them be better Jedi with fewer struggles, even as they always keep the door open for their members to make a different choice as they grow and change if this life isn't one they want to live still. It's why they let Ahsoka walk away after the Wrong Jedi arc even though they also brought her into the Order when she was young. Being raised a Jedi gave Ahsoka a really great foundation, but things changed as she got older and she ended up deciding she had to leave the Order, even if temporarily, to figure out some things for herself and manage her mental health. The Order was happy to support her no matter what she chose, whether she chose to leave or stay, and would've supported her if she'd chosen to return, too.

The Jedi take children whose parents give them up so they can have a better life, they take children who might not HAVE parents anymore, they take children whose parents don't WANT them, and they give them a wonderful supportive life that gives them incredible amounts of education and resources so they can live their life in service to the galaxy and the Force, using their abilities to help others. They provide the children they take in with everything they could need or want to be able to live a happy, healthy life, whether that life ends up being as a Jedi in service to the Republic and the Force or not.

There's also what's been called like a "call to destiny" that the Jedi have, where becoming a Jedi is, in some ways, a destiny for them to fulfill. But much like Anakin's prophecy, it is choice they have to make, not something entirely predestined and chosen for them. The path is THERE, and it calls to them, but they can absolutely ignore that call or misunderstand it or have circumstances keep them from it. But it means that nearly everyone who becomes a Jedi makes that choice because they hear and feel that call to this destiny and have chosen to ANSWER IT. Helping people, serving the galaxy, this is what they were meant to do, and they know it and find joy and satisfaction in that knowledge.

So when the war starts, they obviously know something has gone wrong, they've known it was going wrong for YEARS, at the very least since Maul popped up as the first confirmed Sith in 1000 years, but they are 10,000 people (and whether this number referred to only those Jedi that were in the field and the actual total was much higher or whether this was in fact the ENTIRE TOTAL of Jedi is unconfirmed, but either way they're a small group so the point remains) in a galaxy of TRILLIONS. People have done the math on what this would mean adjusted to the population of the Earth and it's like expecting a church group of 70 people to somehow solve the whole planet's problems. There's only so much they can do. So while they're very cognizant of the growing issues in the Republic even before the war starts, they can only put out so many tire fires at once. Once the war DOES start, they're immediately required to try to put out this one raging wildfire and all the other regular tire fires have to go by the wayside until the wildfire is dealt with. So what are they doing? They're putting out the damn wildfire as quickly as they can with as little loss of life as they can and just hoping the rest of the galaxy can keep itself together long enough for them to DO THAT.

I don't even necessarily agree that they should've been "more involved in politics" because, quite honestly, they seem more aware of how bad things are getting politically than ANYONE ELSE IN THIS STORY (aside from the dude making the situation worse to begin with). It's the JEDI who are actively arguing with the Chancellor about not sending them to war and saying they're not supposed to be an army, it's the JEDI tracking down Kamino and Geonosis and figuring out some of what's actually happening there, it's the JEDI who continue to investigate that even while the war is going on and actually figure out that the clones are a Sith trap, it's the JEDI who ultimately figure out Palpatine is too corrupt to stay in office and then actually DO something about it before anybody does. They might not be active politicians, sure, I'll grant you that, but they're very very clearly aware of what's happening politically and are responding to it more than anyone else we ever see. I'm not sure what more they could've done besides, like, BE politicians which clearly just isn't the role they want to play in the galaxy anyway and wouldn't be good for the kind of work they want to do.

A lot of people like to say things like that, that the Jedi should've been more political and whatnot, but what would that actually have accomplished? What could they have done if they were "more political" than they were already doing? At BEST, the Jedi might be able to get a representative into the Senate and provide one more person capable of speaking out against the Chancellor and the corruption in the Republic, but Padme at a delegation of 2000 Senators with her that were apparently willing to at least recognize Palpatine's corruption and that STILL wasn't enough to stem the tide. One more politician wasn't going to make that big of a difference. So could they have been more political? Yeah, sure, they could've more literally been politicians I guess, but how does that help them more than what they were ACTUALLY doing? Would this somehow have prevented Palpatine from enacting Order 66 or starting the war at all? Or would it have led to the same conclusion no matter what they did because the Jedi's genocide wasn't about the choices the JEDI were making at all?

#star wars #jedi #pro jedi #luke skywalker #anakin critical #anakin skywalker critical

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seeminglyranch87 · 8 months

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Taylor & Travis Timeline

October 2023 - part 1

October 1 - Travis is seen leaving Taylor's NYC apartment around 11am. Travis heads back to his hotel where the team is staying before his Chiefs vs Jets Game at MetLife Stadium

Taylor attends the Chiefs vs Jets game at MetLife Stadium, NJ, with Blake Lively, Ryan Reynolds, Hugh Jackman, Shawn Levy, Donna Kelce, Sophie Turner, Sabrina Carpenter, Brittany Mahomes, Melanie Nyema, Austin Swift & girlfriend Sydney Ness, Ashley Avignone, Robyn Lively, and more. The camera cut to Taylor approx. 17 times during the game and the Eras Tour film trailer played twice during ad breaks. Taylor was seen hugging Donna, saying "you're amazing, I don't know how you do it" when the score was 20-20. Taylor was also seen mimicking Travis. The NFL change their tiktok and twitter pages again to reference Taylor's attendance. Various media outlets post footage of Taylor at the game, Travis likes a post of Taylor's reaction to a Chiefs touchdown. The Chiefs won 23-20.

After the game, Taylor was pictured leaving Zero Bond in the early hours of October 2. (x)

October 3 - Taylor is at Electric Lady Studios, walking in with Keleigh Teller. Taylor's shirt is referencing the song 'Any Man of Mine' by Shania Twain, the first lyrics of which are (x)

"This is what a woman wants Any man of mine better be proud of me"

Her hat says "Still Here", possibly referencing her Karma lyric

"Ask me why so many fade, but I'm still here"

October 3 is also National Boyfriend Day.

US Weekly releases an article with quotes from 6 sources on "Why Taylor isn't hiding her romance with Travis Kelce" (x)

"Taylor has decided she's not going to hide anymore"

"She's going to be her authentic self and enjoy life"

The two "talk every day"

"Taylor's really enjoying getting to know Travis, they're taking it day by day, but she has high hopes. She likes that he's a normal nice guy. He's down-to-earth and isn't affected by fame. She also thinks he's hot"

"Travis is completely smitten"

"Taylor is at a point in her life where she's no longer willing to hold back. If something feels right - like it does with Travis - she's jumping in with both feet. She's very happy and loving life right now"

October 4 - Ep 57 of New Heights airs, part of the title is "The NFL Needs to Calm Down" (x)

"Is the NFL overdoing it? What is your honest opinion on how the NFL is treating celebrities at games?" asks Jason

"I think it's fun when they show who is at the game, I think it brings a little bit more to the atmosphere, brings a little bit more to what you're watching but at the same time I think they're overdoing it a little bit for sure, especially my situation. I think they're just trying to have fun with it... [the celebrities] are not there to get thrown on TV" responds Travis

October 5 - It's Travis' birthday today! He turns 34.

Donna Kelce makes an appearance on the 'Got it From My Momma' podcast. When asked what her favourite Taylor Swift song is, she responds (x)

"I think probably 'Shake It Off' -- we're getting a lot of that lately, about haters," Donna said with a laugh.

When asked if she's surprised about the infatuation surrounding Taylor and Travis' relationship

"I feel like I'm in an alternate universe because it's something that I've never been involved with ever before," Donna said.

The NFL release a statement in response to the New Heights podcast episode discussing the NFL "overdoing" coverage of Taylor at the Chiefs games, saying (x)

"The Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce news has been a pop cultural moment we've leaned into in real time, as it's an intersection of sport and entertainment, and we've seen an incredible amount of positivity around the sport."

October 6 - Travis speaks at a press conference. When asked about how he is adjusting to public interest in his relationship with Taylor, he says (x)

"As all the attention comes, it feels like I was on top of the world after the Super Bowl and right now, even more on top of the world. So it's fun,"

“We’re learning with the paparazzi just taking photos from all over the place. But at the same time, it comes with it,” he continued. “You got a lot of people that care about Taylor for good reason. You just got to keep living and learning and enjoying the moments. At the end of the day, I’ve always been pretty good at compartmentalising and being able to stay focused in this building.”

“I always check myself and my ego at the door and make sure that I come in with a clear mind,” he said, before being asked his thoughts on Swift’s world. “It’s worldwide, it’s worldwide, man. It’s been magnified for sure, though.”

A report comes out stating that the NFL asked its networks to promote the Taylor Swift Eras Tour Film at the Chiefs vs Jets game, likely in a bid to get Taylor to perform at the Super Bowl halftime show. (x)

October 6 - Taylor reportedly flew to Kansas City "to see Travis" for his birthday to have a "chill night" (x). A sneaky little visit for Trav's birthday.

October 7 - Taylor leaves Kansas City.

Travis flies into Minnesota for the Chiefs vs Vikings game

October 8 - Travis plays in the Chiefs vs Vikings game in Minnesota. Travis injures his ankle during the game but after an x-ray he returns to the field and scores a touchdown. The Chiefs win 27-20 (x) (x) (x)

Travis would later post pictures of this walk-in fit with the caption (x)

"keep it chill like Sauvignon Blanc"

These are lyrics from the song "Lil Boo Thang" by Paul Russell, which contains other lyrics such as

"I'll be shootin' that shot like 2K, girl"

"But I'm tryna get to know you at least Don't take my talkin' to you wrong I can keep it chill like a sauvignon blanc I'ma keep it real when your man long gone If you're lookin' for a friend, then you got the wrong song"

"You a ten, baby girl, but I'm the one"

October 9 - The Messenger puts out an article in which a source states (x x)

"[Travis] jokes [Taylor] is his good luck charm.

“Taylor is having the time of her life at these football games cheering on Travis. [Taylor] and her friends are fully embracing this era and are having a lot of fun being there. Taylor has worked very hard this last year and It’s fun for her to bring all of her friends along, let loose and show support.”

October 11 - Taylor is in LA for her Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour Film premiere. She shuts down The Grove, LA to host a red carpet and early screening event with selected fans, wearing a very 1989-coded blue Oscar de la Renta dress.

Travis, take note, she loved us first <3

TMZ releases an article saying that Taylor intends to attend Travis' next game. The question is, will Travis play with his injured ankle? (x)

"Sources with direct knowledge tell TMZ Taylor plans to travel to Missouri to watch Travis and the Kansas City Chiefs take on the Denver Broncos"

October 12 - Taylor attends Arrowhead Stadium to support Travis as the Kansas Chiefs take on Denver Broncos. Taylor is seen cheering on the team alongside Donna Kelce and Ed Kelce. Chiefs defeat Broncos 19 - 8 (x)

The Eras Tour concert film is released today (a day early) due to high demand in the USA and Canada (x)

October 13 - I go to see the Eras Tour concert film! just an FYI :)

October 14 - Taylor, Travis and friends fly to NYC

Taylor and Travis photographed holding hands as they arrive at Nobu, NYC, publicly confirming that they are a couple (x)

Taylor and Travis make guest appearances on SNL - Travis makes a cameo at the end of a sketch parodying the NFL frenzy over their romance. Taylor introduces Ice Spice as the musical guest. (full skit x) SNL IG (x x)

Taylor & Travis attend the SNL afterparty at Catch Steak NYC (x)

October 15 - Travis attends Eagles vs Jets game to support his brother Jason Kelce at MetLife Stadium, NJ. He is seen leaving Taylor's NYC apartment. Travis is given a friendship bracelet with beads spelling out "on the map" referencing a tiktok trend. He smiles and holds it to his heart. (x) (x)

Taylor & Travis are pictured leaving The Waverly Inn, NYC (x).

A nosey diner shares her observations of Taylor & Travis getting cosy (x)

Annie Williamson told The Messenger. "It looked super romantic and was super intimate."

"I cannot emphasize enough how close they were sitting, like so close and snuggled up."

Ms Williamson also shared a video of the couple leaving the restaurant (x). Thank you for your service Annie 🫡

Erin Andrews and Charissa Thompson remind their listeners of the Calm Down with Erin and Charissa podcast recorded on August 3 where they implore Taylor to date their friend Travis (x)

“please try our friend Travis. He is fantastic”

to which Travis commented on IG

“😂😂 You two are something else!! 🙌🏻🙌🏻 I owe you big time!!”

Go to previous update -> September 2023 Part 2

Go to next update -> October 2023 Part 2

Return to timeline

#taylor swift #travis kelce #taylor and travis #taylor swift and travis kelce #traylor #87 and 89 #timeline #killatrav #seemingly ranch #tayvis #Taylor & Travis timeline #87 + 13 = 100

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cockslutpadalecki · 1 year

Text

Book of Revelations (And A Side of Coffee)

Summary: You love Sam. He loves you. But both of you are too chicken to do anything about your feelings, until matchmaker Dean Winchester (aka Cupid) steps in.

Characters: Sam Winchester x F!Reader, Dean Winchester.

Words: 1.3K.

Warnings: pure unfiltered fluff, some mentions of sex.

A/N: Formerly a Patreon exclusive. Beta: @princessmisery666 but all the genera bullshit is entirely mine. While likes are gold, feedback is golden. Please support our content creators by sharing our work.

You drop a handful of chopped onions into the pot on the stove, giving the bubbling liquid a quick stir, when you hear Dean’s voice sound behind you.

“Hey,” he starts, “what would you say is your perfect date?”

You rotate on your heel, narrowing your eyes at the older Winchester standing in the doorway. “Are we talking about some Miss Congeniality deal or like... a genuine date? With a person?”

“What Miss Congeniality deal?”

“Y’know, the bit with Cheryl, April 25th,” you explain with a little laugh, but the quizzical and confused look still on your friend’s face is not lost on you. You let out a little huff. “C’mon De, I thought you’d seen it.”

“I might’ve stumbled across it once or twice,” he defends, “but I don’t commit every second of a film to memory.”

“Oh please. What about the All Saints’ Day series? You can quote all of them off by heart.”

“That’s because they’re classics.”

“Are you saying Miss Congeniality isn’t a classic?”

“It has its perks-”

“Like Sandra Bullock?”

“She’s in that movie?” Dean laughs, giving himself away.

“Jackass,” you shake your head as you allow a small smile to break across your lips. “Anyway, why do you ask?”

“Just curious,” Dean shrugs.

“Have you been reading my Cosmo mag on the can again?”

“Well, excuse me for wanting to find out how to achieve the perfect orgasm,” he reacts with fake offense.

You scoff mockingly. “Did you come across a map on how to find the G-spot?”

Dean’s face drops. “I’m serious, just answer the damn question.”

“Ooh, I hit a nerve,” you laugh, but Dean doesn’t share your sentiment. “Well, um, I guess, it’d be nice to go to one of those vintage book shops, y’know, the ones with the little cafes inside.”

Dean nods, and you reluctantly continue.

“Spend a couple of hours talking about our favourite novels over a coffee or two.”

“What about after that?”

“Like, sex you mean?”

“Yeah.”

You screw up your nose. “I wouldn’t put out on the first date.”

“Not even on your perfect date?” he asks as you shake your head. “What if it was with Sam?” Dean cajoles, flashing you a wink.

“Dean!”

It’s no secret that you’ve been harbouring feelings for the younger Winchester for a while now— except maybe to Sam, and Dean takes whatever opportunity he can get to tease you for not making a move. You’re far too shy for that.

“C’mon, you wouldn’t want to come back here and y’know?” Dean wiggles his eyebrows.

“Why’d you always have to be so crass?” you tut with a small roll of your eyes.

“Jeez, you two really are made for each other,” Dean mutters under his breath, but you don’t hear him, your attention already back on the sweet smelling bolognese cooking away in the saucepan.

“Meet me at Bradbury Books, 8pm.”

That’s all the instruction you get from Dean a week later. You reply asking if it’s related to a case you’ve not been made privy to yet, but he fails to respond, leaving you in a curious state for the rest of the day. What could Dean possibly want with you at a bookstore, of all places?

You trundle inside the quaint little shop at 7:56, eyes darting back and forth through the aisles, trying to see if he’s hidden away between them, to no avail. Eventually you give up, walking down to the cluster of tables tucked neatly away at the back of the store. A few delicate red and pink decorations adorn the wall furthest from you, but you think nothing of it. But your attention is finally drawn to the handful of balloons with the words, “Happy Valentines Day,” emblazoned across them in swirly white writing that softly sway to the steady hum of the A/C.

Of course. Today is February 14th.

Great. Always a joy being single at this time of year.

The cafe section is practically empty except for the cashier leant over the counter— head buried in an extremely well-read paperback version of The Shining. Then there’s a couple by the window staring lovingly at each other over two steaming mugs of coffee and… Sam.

Wait, Sam?

There’s a closed copy of The Marvelous Land of Oz on the table next to him, while his hands are curled around a cup of what you assume must be herbal tea from the green liquid, almost murky against the stark contrast of the white ceramic. You’re sidetracked momentarily, thoughts drifting to fantasies of those large hands on you, pawing at your ample flesh. They’re so big that they easily overlap where they meet around the sides of the dainty cup, the fingers from his left hand entwined within the fingers of his right.

He doesn’t notice you until you’re almost at the table, eyes widening when he finally looks up, confusion etched on his features.

Your name oozes from his lips as he questions softly, “What are you doing here?”

“Dean asked me to meet him,” you explain, sliding into the seat opposite. You suddenly feel incredibly underdressed— your ripped jeans and oversized t-shirt are perfect to meet up with Dean to discuss case details, but if you’d known Sam would be here too, you would’ve made more of an effort.

“That’s weird, Dean asked me to meet him too.” Sam leans back in his chair, thumbing inside his pocket for something before pulling his cell free. “Lemme give him a call.”

“Maybe he’s just late?” you offer as Sam puts the device to his ear, waiting for his brother to pick up.

“Oh, hey, where are you?” Sam asks Dean, placing the phone onto the table as he presses the speaker icon, giving you a chance to listen in on the conversation too.

“Just at a bar over in Burr Oak,” Dean tells them. “It’s 2-4-1 cocktails night and there’s a bachelorette party that’s just walked in. One of the bridesmaids is in clear need of my assistance,” he adds with a knowing laugh.

“But you asked us to meet you here at 8,” Sam replies tersely.

The line is silent for a moment before you hear Dean chuckle. “Oh yeah, about that,” he elaborates. “Figured you two should spend Valentine’s together considering you’re both head over heels in love with each other.”

You almost choke on your own tongue at Dean’s words, feeling Sam’s eyes trained on you as your entire body flushes hot at the admission.

Dean has to be joking, right? Sam? In love with you?

“Dude, what are you-” Sam starts at the same time as you try to interject. “No Dean, don’t be silly-”

“Hey!” Dean shouts down the line. “Cut it out, both of you. I’ve seen the longing looks you give each other, and all that awkward small talk. God, it’s exhausting. Just admit your feelings and fuck all that sexual tension out like adults, okay?”

“Dean,” Sam protests through gritted teeth, quickly flashing an apologetic smile toward the couple by the window who catch Dean’s crude and less than subtle attempts to bring you together.

“Look, enjoy a cup of coffee and talk about old books, or whatever it is you two do, and then the Bunker is all yours,” Dean continues. “Even though you both said no sex on the first date, I really think ya would make an exception for the other. Just don’t do it in the kitchen, y’hear? That’s just unsanitary.”

The line suddenly goes dead. Both of you sit embarrassed in silence momentarily, not wanting to look at each other until he clears his throat and you glance up through thick eyelashes.

Sam smiles, dimples in full effect. “So, I guess he asked about your perfect date too then, huh?”

***

SPN: @akshi8278 @cluz1babe @deanwanddamons @fandom-princess-forevermore @flamencodiva @fanfictionandfluff @hobby27 @hoboal87 @jensenswinchester @jc-winchester @katelyn--renee @mrswhozeewhatsis @peachyafshawn @ravenclawfitzgerald @spnbaby-67 @sammykb1994 @sucker-for-dean @treat-winchesterswith-kindness @thoughts-and-funnies @waywardbaby @winchest09

4EVS: @amirra88 @andreasworlsboring101 @b3autyfuldisast3r @cheesyclaire @chibijusstuff @callsignrambam @dangertoozmanykids101 @daughterofthenight117 @doozywoozy @foxyjwls007 @geekofmanyforms @heyyouwiththeassbutt @i-opened-the-chamber-of-secrets @ilovefanfic86 @kind-of-crazy-butthatsokay @letsby @letsdisneythings @labella420 @mogaruke @maliburenee @notyourtypicalrose @nik2writes @obsessivelycapricious @patrick-hockslutter @princessmisery666 @phildunphyisadilf @sage-writing @sea040561 @sweeterthanthis @slutformarvelmen @smokeandnailz @stoneyggirl @stoneyggirl2 @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @thegirlnextdoorssister @unfortunate-brat @wayward-dreamer @warriorqueen1991 @xoxabs88xox

#sam winchester #sam winchester x you #sam winchester x reader #sam winchester fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction #jared padalecki fanfiction

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gottagobackintime · 1 year

Text

Music (and movies) and queerness in Ted Lasso. Particularly in relation to Ted (and Trent)

I want to start with a line from the show that contains the word music.

“If music be the food of love, play on. Give me excess of it.” Said by Mae to Ted in a scene where a few moments later Trent walks up to him after leaving his date to go talk to him. It’s a quote from the VERY queer Shakespeare play “Twelfth Night”. The line implies that the speaker wants to be fed more, to the point of it making them sick so that they won’t desire, love in this case, anymore. Because he’s unhappily in love with someone who he can’t have (Michelle?). BUT he falls in love with someone else later. And in the context of Ted Lasso, this line just so happens to be said right before they show us that Trent is there. Ted also answers Mae, not by asking if she’s asking him if he wants more but “If that’s your fancy way of asking if I want another one, you guessed right”.Another love?And according to James Lance, it was when he was on his way to film this scene that he found out that Trent is gay and that he is “with that guy” as he himself puts it. A man who has a moustache very similar to Ted’s and wears similar clothes.

(Also, this happens in season 2 episode 7. In season 3, episode 7 Ted talks about the red string/thread of fate myth while Trent wears a red bracelet and they are connected by red several times and season 3, episodes 7 and 11 are connected via “You’ve got Mail”, the opening scene in episode 7 being a “tribute” to the movie, and there are other smaller references. And the team, and Trent, watching the movie in episode 11. AndTrent also wears the bracelet in episode 11, an episode I’ll bring up later in this post).

Now, let us get to the music.

Bruce Springsteen If you google “Bruce Springsteen queer” you get a lot of results discussing queerness in his songs and so on, so to put him in this post is a must.

Bruce Springsteen is brought up by Dottie in season 3 episode 11. She tells Trent about the time Ted got onstage and danced with Bruce Springsteen (which turns out to be a lie) but the connection to Springsteen is still there, because Ted did get onstage with a Bruce Springsteen cover band and sang with them. So, we’ve established a connection between Ted (and Trent) and Bruce Springsteen.

Let’s connect it to something else that happened in the episode. They watch “You’ve Got Mail” starring Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan (I’ll come back to “You’ve Got Mail” later, the important part here is Tom Hanks). Ted states that the superior Nora Ephron/Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan movie is “Sleepless in Seattle”,a movie about a reporter falling for a single dad simply because of the way he talks about things and what he talks about. He brings the movie up twice, once to say that it’s superior and once telling someone to watch it. Now what does “Sleepless in Seattle” have to do with Bruce Springsteen? “Sleepless in Seattle” came out in 1993, as did “Philadelphia” a movie about a gay man played by Tom Hanks. Springsteen made a song called “Streets of Philadelphia”, specifically for this movie. A bit farfetched? Eh, perhaps, but I’m including it anyway.

So, in this episode Trent, a gay man, is told by Ted’s mum that Ted once went onstage with Bruce Springsteen and that’s the story he needs to confirm straight away. He practically skips towards Ted’s office to ask about it. Why that story? Surely she told him about other things too. And he heard the stories she told the team. But this was the story he was excited to get confirmed. A story about Ted’s connection to an artist that has several queer connections and who can also be connected to something else that is brought up in the episode.

Queen Let’s get the obvious out of the way. Their lead singer was queer.

And I talked about Fat Bottomed Girls and Queen/Freddie/Brian in THIS post. And I talk a little bit about the connection between Ted and Freddie Mercury in THIS post.

Queen has been used a lot throughout “Ted Lasso”, a lot more than I remembered. When I went back to look at the soundtrack for season 1 and 2, I found quite a few Queen songs. I also discovered that two of the trailers for season 2 had Queen songs in the background. “Under Pressure” (which also features David Bowie, another queer artist) and “We Will Rock You”.

Ted talks about having watched Queen at Live Aid on TV when he was younger, in season 2, episode 8 (that episode is called “Man City”, Ted mentions both Queen and Freddie Mercury. Season 3 episode 11 is called “Mom City” and Freddie Mercury is brought up again and a Queen song plays.) “Tear It Up” plays in season 2, episode 2 “We Are the Champions” plays in season 2, episode 9 “Fat Bottomed Girls” are both mentioned and played in season 3, episode 11 And, while not a Queen song, “Fought & Lost” by Sam Ryder featuring Brian May is also played in season 3, episode 11.

But let’s focus on “Fat Bottomed Girls”. Now, I’ve already talked about it in THIS post, that I also linked above. So, I won’t go over all that again. But a little recap, “Fat Bottomed Girls” is linked to “Bicycle Race” which is sometimes seen as a metaphor for being bi. They were both on the same single and they reference each other. The song is brought up by Higgins when he tells Keeley and Rebecca that Freddie, when he briefly owned Richmond in 1980, tried to make that song Richmond’s song but that it didn’t work. Rebecca then brings up that her dad went to art school with Freddie and that according to him if you would have asked Freddie what his greatest talent was, he would have said “flipping straights”.

We’ve already established Ted’s connection to Queen. And we’ve heard Ted refer to himself as straight just a few episodes ago (episode 7, and I’ve already pointed out the connection between episodes 7 and 11, this is another connection) now we get to hear Rebecca say that Freddie Mercury’s biggest talent was “flipping straights”. Ted is, as far as I know, and I’ve checked, the only person who refers to himself as straight, in the whole show. Not a single other character does that. Once in the Christmas special, once in season 3, episode 7, that’s two times. Will the rule of three apply here? Will he say that he’s straight a third time or will he subvert expectations or if you will, flip the script and say that he’s something else?

Dolly Parton Trent has worn a Dolly Parton shirt twice. Dolly Parton is a queer icon. In season 3, episode 11 Beard feels the need to call dibs on Dolly’s part in “Islands in the Stream” at karaoke. Implying that Ted perhaps snags that part for himself a lot of the time. Ted then walks away singing “Islands in the Stream”. Yet another queer connection between Trent and Ted via music.

Harry Nilsson/ (Judy Garland) Back to “You’ve got Mail”. The last scene of “You’ve got mail” ends with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan meeting up and they kiss while Harry Nilsson’s cover of “Somewhere over the Rainbow” plays in the background. We’re shown that scene, not just by witnessing the characters watching it, but by it filling our own screen for a while. “Somewhere over the Rainbow” is of course from “The Wizard of Oz” originally, sung by Judy Garland. A queer icon. The connection to “The Wizard of Oz” and Ted Lasso has been brought up before. But in this episode, it’s very front and centre. Ted is standing at “The Wizard of Oz” pinball machine, staring at the spinning house. And of course, Ted’s connection to Kansas is always there. And it’s brought up in a very important way this episode, with his mother more or less telling him he should go home to Kansas.

So, we have a well-established connection between Ted and Kansas and “The Wizard of Oz”. Let’s talk more about Judy Garland, Dorothy, the original singer of “Somewhere over the Rainbow”. As I mentioned above, Judy Garland was and is a queer icon. And “The Wizard of Oz” was and is a big part of the queer community. Then we have the “Friend of Dorothy” euphemism, a way to recognise other queer people, and it’s strongly associated with Judy Garland’s Dorothy. In episode 11 we are introduced to Ted’s mother, Dottie, which is a nickname/shortening of Dorothy. Another very clear queer connection to Ted.

And let us also look at James Lance who has said that there is a story arc for Trent’s shirts. And he wore a t-shirt with Dorothy’s ruby slippers to an event that is connected to Ted Lasso. And when asked why he was wearing that shirt, why he chose to honour Dorothy. It feels like he’s deflecting when he says “Well, every good character’s got to have a good pair of shoes, right. And these are surely, surely,the best pair of shoes in showbiz. So, you know, they get their own t-shirt. There aren’t many shoes to do that.” That’s suspicious. And we now know that James has had a lot of input into Trent’s costume, with him suggesting things and getting a thumbs up a lot of the time. He clearly thinks that clothes are important and can send a message. And he chose to wear a Dorothy shirt to a red carpet. When we now know that the eleventh episode of season three had several heavy references to “The Wizard of Oz”.

And to go back to Harry Nilsson. A song sung by him was on the soundtrack for Midnight Cowboy, starring Dustin Hoffman and Jon Voight, a queer movie. (And let’s remember that Trent himself said that Dustin Hoffman would probably play him in a movie).

Honourable mention

Mumford & Sons/Marcus Mumford

Why would I add Mumford & Sons and Marcus Mumford? Because Marcus Mumford made the theme song to Ted Lasso and the instrumental songs for the soundtrack, they’ve also used both Mumford & Sons and Marcus Mumford songs in the show. And the band have a connection to Jason Sudeikis. He was in the official music video for Mumford & Sons’ song “Hopeless Wanderer”, inthat video he clearly plays a version of Marcus, and he kisses another man in it. I think that deserves an honourable mention.

So, to sum it all up, there is queer subtext in the music and the artists that they mention and play in Ted Lasso, and these are just the ones that I personally can connect to Ted (and Ted/Trent). I don’t know if it is a coincidence, but I feel like there is way too much to just be a coincidence. To borrow part of Trent’s line “Through thousands of imperceptible moments, all leading to their inevitable conclusion.” Number four, that doesn’t even matter (but it actually does), LOVE. Queer love.

#ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #tedependent #trent crimm #ted/trent #ted x trent #nicole watches stuff #I really hope this post makes sense #this post can be summed up with the words:#started making it had a breakdown... bon appétit #I'm sorry to say that I've literally gone insane #just look at this post #I didn't even mean to make this post #I was just going to make a little gifset about the times they've had Queen in the episodes #because I'm a fan of Queen #and then I fell down the rabbit hole #and I ended up with this #and then I thought hey let's go out with a bang you know #if it truly is the last ever episode of ted lasso next week then let's have some fun #the more I looked the more everything connected #like the things that happen in season 2 and 3 episode 7 #also discovered that in one of the trailers for season 2 they have a shot of trent smiling at ted in the press room #a shot that isn't in the episode #so yeah... um...#I went deep #I really hope you all get some enjoyment out of this post #I put more effort into this post than I did when I tried (and failed) to write a researched paper at uni (that paper made me drop out again

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moonfeatherblue · 11 days

Text

*Blue, on realising she has not yet provided all the wonderful MacGuffins with the notes from our previous brainstorming stream*

...

...?

...???!!!

I'M SOOOOOOOO SORRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!

HERE'S THE VOD!!!

youtube

AND HERE ARE THE NOOOOOOOTESSSS!!!

Brainstorming - INCONVENIENT CURSES

What are the most creative, most irritating, yet ultimately harmless ways we could magically ruin somebody’s day? Who are we cursing and why? What about any unintended side effects? How do we break these curses? Is there anyone this curse just will not affect?

Hangnails

One nostril only

Small creature shows up random times of the day to make people question their decision; they have to answer and the creature only leaves when person annoyed; person left with feelings of annoyance and never knows why; the cursed ate the last pizza

Seasonal allergies

World procedurally regenerated each day; when you wake up need to refigure where all your common spots are; workplace across down, directly above you, etc

Sneezing before you lie; can’t fib without sneezing; break it by being honest for an entire day

Everything 2cm left of where your senses think it is

Fart whenever it’s quiet – library, buses, awkward silences; curse on someone who was extremely rude and made them feet embarrassed – now YOU shall be the one who is embarrassed

Every time you feed your pet you hear their thoughts about the food; too salty, too chewy, not enough meat; person cursed likely a vet, shelter worker, etc

CAN A CURSE BE PASSED LIKE A COLD, MUTATION, ETC

Curse where say your thoughts out loud without realising it

Inconvenient curses gravitate towards those who commit social faux pas – more you do, more curses you get

Speak in emojis

Sing everything you say

50% chance of getting something stuck in your eye in a particular area or time

Curse where constantly switch regional dialects

Mistake someone waving to someone behind you as waving to you – every time and obviously

Losing balance at odd moments

Random allergy to whatever and only cure is apple juice, apple pie, etc

Crave random food even if you don’t know it

Get good ideas to just forget it but know that it happened

Randomly hear someone calling your name but it’s in your head

Sometimes poetic justice; sometimes people are just petty (and easily offended)

Every time you touch something fingertips leave paint stains only you can see and they disappear when you look away/blink

Curse to see lights shine more intensely/every light source is a flashbang

Unable to say a specific word; only way to break the curse is to get someone else to say it and pass the curse on

Everything inanimate around you is alive – talk, think, laugh, etc – but only the cursed are aware

Touch renders medicine ineffective; only affects medicine you don’t take; could accidentally render much of the world’s medicine unusable

Have series/film/games/books, etc spoiled at random unexpected points

Every time someone prays for you downfall, get a random tiny annoying curse, etc, routine toe stubbing; celebrities, politicians, etc

Unable to distinguish dreams from real life

Forced to say dad jokes, only if you try to say it something physically stops you

Sneeze every time someone talks about you

Makes you believe you have children, but you don’t

Lose a dollar each time you lay a curse; magical curse jar

Unable to have your own emotions; only able to feel others’ emotions

Cursed so unable to swear

Cursed not to laugh

Curse corporation/billionaire so for 64 days they lose twice as much money as last time

Every time you use a microwave time slows by 10%

Every day a the same time play a movie in head or recite a long quote

Cursed to become Australian; only way to break the curse is to move somewhere else

Toenails are now delicious

Every time you’ve forgotten something you get an itch you can’t scratch

Cursed balloon – if it hits the ground SOMETHING INCONVENIENT HAPPENS

Only speak in rhymes, movie quotes, lyrics

Fluent in every language, only you can never speak the language of the person you’re trying to speak with at that time

Always see a silhouette in the corner of your eye, but it moves to another ‘corner’ whenever you try to get a better look

Magical games of rock, paper, scissors – loser is cursed INCONVENIENTLY

Every purchase made, at least one dollar must be made with physical currency

Believe people like your jokes, but people actually hate them; real curse is you keep alienating people without realising with your terrible jokes

Never have the exact amount of change

Every sink tap is too short and you rub your hands against the wall of the sink every time you wash

Curse that changes sexuality; only once or a daily occurrence or every time someone smiles at you; only use in very specific conditions; a not too difficult way to break the curse

Cursed word search – the last word always changes when you try to find it

Normal person, 9-5 job, nothing on criminal record, cursed that every hitman in the world knows their exact location; no one cares

Every time you do the laundry, one sock will teleport to a random location in your house

Cursed microphone with a constantly changing filter

All drinks not out of the tap undrinkable

Cursed toilet stall – instant intercontinental travel; no control; isekai toilet

Every video game you own turns into Shrek Cart – even if you buy a new game, it immediately turns into Shrek Cart; how do we break this – find a genuine copy and get gold trophies on every prix; beat the game in 7 days otherwise you’re stuck

Passport always expired

Random points in time, favourite and disliked fandom ships are flipped

Computer transformed into operatable reproduction of ENIAC

People always call you by the wrong, but close enough first name – Jon or Greg instead of George 0

Cursed object – insulting magic 8 ball

Cursed so that people think you look like a celebrity who looks nothing like you

Slowed metabolism to the point that fruit becomes like wine

RPG maker game must beat in seven days or else you turn into a living voxel version of your character sprite

OC turns out to be a niche character from an official media

Cursed necklace – shifts to compliment your outfit, but can’t take it off or make it longer, shorter, etc – whacks in face playing sport, etc; gets stuck in machines, etc

Cursed shoes – can change into any shoes you want, but every time, eg, you walk by the end of a curb you trip; are there ways to counter the tripping?

Curse unable to have your own opinions; makes you adopt any opinion you hear

Cursed necklace makes you say the opposite of what you intend

World around you lowers in polygon count and graphical detail as the real main character walks away and loads a different section of the map; break the curse if you find the real protagonist, but only get a few guesses; MC curses given to people who are overly narcissistic

Cursed spoon – can’t hold more than 50% capacity; if more, everything falls off

Curse where can rid people of their grudges, but you obtain the grudge of the person you took it from

Move like you have tank controls

Live through most viewed ao3 tags and tropes

Cursed grill randomly curses food

Know you’re part of the main cast of a show, but the least favourite

See relationships people share connecting them as strings of different colours

Whenever you wish misfortune upon someone, you get hit with a random inconvenient curse

Cursed to, when you are an adult, be hit with an unknown curse, spend childhood learning and preparing to deal with any curse and spend YA figuring out your curse

Cursed object – world’s most comfy bed/sofa, but gives you random status effects – sleepy, itchy, freezing, hot, sneezy, etc

First bite of meal is heavenly, but becomes worse and worse the more you eat; a food critic is cursed; all the people they critique would suffer as well; eventually figure out the critic is the problem, not the food; could be a cursed restaurant so all their food is like this

Need to use a new pair of utensils for every bite of a meal; or else the utensils dissolve into the food(?); what if use hands??? Very unpleasant…

Need to wash your hands every time you turn the page of a book, magazine, comic, etc; OCD implications; also applies to digital media; break by stopping obsessing over cleanliness – what if you can’t due to health reasons?

Cursed website – has all the answers you need but won’t stop buffering

Person you are talking to knows the last tab you opened

Unable to do what you should when on camera – instead of behaving like yourself, behave like a chaotic three year old

Cursed car – the car of your dreams, but e.g. runs on songs, reciting poem, etc, from memory, or need to do a captcha before driving and always fails a few times; would work well with a villain who is a singer – monologue-powered car

In social situations, every time you have a good joke or idea, someone else beats you to it; the cursed people are those who always interrupt or talk over others

Curse where everything you say happens and to stop it from happening you have to speak in rhyme

Sub-standard adrenaline, so slightly slower and groggier in high-pressure situations, but also means anxiety not as bad

Every time a Hollywood celebrity makes a film about a certain condition, they are they diagnosed with it

Everything in your agenda and calendar must happen even if you’re not ready, so you end up standing in a room doing nothing until allotted time is over

Blood is a dazzling unnatural color so when blush it’s obvious – turn bright purple, blue, etc – mortifying… but kind of cute

Cursed yoyo never goes back up but has infinite string

Captcha curses – click all the images with a bike, one image has a tiny bit of bike tyre in it, need to debate whether it counts

Cursed doll – wants to be your friend, but can only move for 10 seconds a day when you’re not in the room

Curse someone with certain subservient kinds and interests to be errand person of an attractive person they’re into – magically-bound servant

People who talk in theatres/cinemas – cursed to a respectful hush whenever the lights go down; makes it hard to speak up after sunset; break the curse by accepting your behaviour can affect others and making a conscious effort to be quiet in these situations; does not affect those with a diagnosable difficulty with volume control

If you drop litter, every piece of litter you pass follows you around, shuffling along after you in a trail, until you actively pick up every piece and put it in the appropriate bins; weaker effect if litter was dropped completely by accident

Every song you sing, you manifest the lyrics

Haunting figure eternally watching you through the window, but when you go out they’re gone

Every time you try to say a rhyme, you mispronounce the rhyming vowel – you have a very important poetry competition coming up

When you press backspace it deletes the entire – sentence? Paragraph? STORY????

Eraser that always smudges but does smudge on blank paper

Eternal light source dimmer – all others turn it back to normal

Every time you do/cross a source of bad luck it multiplies the effect; how to break this curse before it really hurts you

Guess everything correctly at the very last minute – STRESSFUL but potentially useful? The people you’re with wonder why you didn’t think of it earlier

In life need balanced good and bad luck – learn how to accumulate more ‘safe’ bad luck to manipulate good luck; casino – accumulate good or back luck? Balance out eventually to good luck

A bully cursed so their right hand always shoots straight up when the teacher asks a question, whether they know the answer or not; the bully becomes the bullied; how to break the curse – STOP BEING A BULLY

In a public space always run into a random person from work/school that you don’t really know or recognise, but they definitely know youuuuuuuu

Presentation curse – always make Freudian slips, a stutter that only comes out while making presentations, etc

Feel like you want dessert but actually too full and it makes you sick…

A cursed publishing house forces authors to take breaks or else their nails fall out and get stuck under the keys of their keyboard; only regrow when they sleep

Always confuse 100 with 0 by accident

Cursed to never run as fast as you think, lift as much as you think, climb as high as you think, etc; would make you second guess your abilities all the time; confidence-related; person who receives this curse has a big ego, overconfident, etc; metaphor for health problems

Can only speak in double/triple negatives and confuse everyone

Terrible jokes at inappropriate times; only jokes you can tell now

What are some potential plotlines that could include these inconvenient curses?

A small-time witch in financial straits because she can’t stop laying curses and is herself cursed to lose a dollar every time she lays a curse; magical mafia??

Follow a magical researcher trying to figure out the inconvenient curse problem like it’s cancer research; are all inconvenient curses based on the same magic

Cursed jewellery shop – sometimes buy to curse others; sometimes buy objects with some good side effects for yourself, learn to deal with the curse part; cursed to sell cursed jewellery until equal the price of the cursed crown the shop keeper stole

Criminal cursed so everyone they talk to knows the last tab they opened – suddenly getting in trouble a lot more

A world where inconvenient curses are commonplace – lots of shops, etc, buy curses – e.g. achieving enlightenment can grant immunity from all curses; many supposed remedies that don’t work well

Rounding up enough curses to create a ‘blessed one’

Group of witches competing with each other to see who’s the best at hexing, so they place inconvenient curses to measure their prowess – who do they curse? Round up people who deserve it? POV of someone randomly rounded up to be a victim in this game? Witches go looking for victims or, while they search, wind up getting cursed themselves; just round up people they don’t like? IS THIS A SPORT with sponsors, championships, etc; people cursed are petty criminals convicted to take part? Sponsors on witches hats; theme songs???

MC inherits all the curses in the world and carries them to cleanse the world

Cursed food truck selling cursed food to find the one who is immune to curses; what will they do once they find people who are immune?

Unlucky guy upsets a bunch of witches (by accident?) but only enough to be cursed inconveniently; has to make it up to them so they remove it; servant to a witch coven? But treated well; doesn’t want to actually break the curse because likes his life with them – better than unlucky life outside; actually wholesome, winds up not minding the silly curses; witches eventually remove curses because he’s become like family; cute ways for him to endear himself to the witches; witches everyday lives – some traditionally witchy aspects, but still going to work every day, etc; basically stay-at-home partner for entire witch coven

#indie vtuber #writing #brainstorming #curses #vtubers of tumblr #blue mooney #moonfeatherblue #writeblr #envtuber #writers of tumblr #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #creative writing #fantasy #english vtuber #vtuber uprising #vtubers on tumblr #Youtube

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the-hidden-writer · 13 days

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A Piece of True Fiction: Chapter 13

An Alan Wake 2 fic. Spoilers for Alan Wake 2!

Summary: Aleksi Kesä manages to slip out of the spiral and film he was trapped in.

Saga Anderson, caught in the middle of Wake's horror story, finds a man that looks identical to her partner in the middle of the woods. He's lost, confused, and only seems to speak Finnish. Saga has to try and uncover the truth as well as trying to save her family. Where did he come from? How did he get here?

And where's her Casey?

Chapter Summary: Saga asks Ilmo for help. Words: 2,457 AO3 Link: [Here!] [First part] [Previous part] [Next part]

A Piece of True Fiction

Chapter 13: Brotherhood

“So let me get this straight. Alex Casey, who is real and was partnered on the case with you, is trapped in the lake right now.”

“Yup.”

“And this is because the man in there, the one you busted your ass to save, is a metaphysical conjuration from the Threshold under the lake and took his place.”

“Mhmm.”

“And you’re in possession of a potential Object of Power- which is a whole other conversation we need to have, by the way- that Wake says he’s bound to and can use to ‘fix’ what you claim to be a false rewritten reality, originally written by Wake himself but edited by his, quote, ‘evil doppelgänger’?”

Saga cringes. Having the facts laid out straight in her head made everything seem straightforward, but hearing it spoken back to her starts to make her feel as crazy as she sounds. Still not as crazy as Wake, at the very least.

“If you mean the Clicker, then yeah, that's right. And I’m just passing on what Wake said,” she answers.

Estevez continues to hear her out, though not without a heavy slice of doubt.

“But you won't give it to him now because… why?”

Now that’s a question with a simple answer.

“Because I don't think losing Casey is something he wrote into his story. Maybe he can fix his own mistakes- he’d better- but I don't know how he’d be able to fix something he doesn't know anything about. Or maybe he could, but I can't risk Casey’s life like that.”

“So you want to perform a ritual on… ‘Kesä’, did you say?”

“That's right.”

“Okay, yet another paranatural crime right there but… fine, I digress. So this ritual, the one the Cult of the Tree has been performing, is one where you want to take out his heart to purposely infect him with the Shadow and somehow exchange him for Casey?”

“It’s something like that, but that's why I need to talk to Ilmo to figure out the specifics.”

Estevez shakes her head. “Okay, I can't brush that one off. Rituals are dangerous as is, but in an uncontrolled environment? This ritual is murder, Anderson.”

“He’s not real,” Saga counters, not dwelling on the way Estevez speaks of the concept of rituals with what sounds like experience.

“According to who?”

“Alan Wake.”

Estevez frowns. She takes a breath and looks Saga directly in the eye.

“I know how it all sounds,” Saga says with a wince before Estevez gets the chance to say anything. “I just don’t know what else I can do. I followed Wake’s directions with Nightingale's heart and that ritual worked, so I just need to trust that it’ll work again a second time.”

“I don’t like this, Anderson. Not one bit.”

“Neither do I,” Saga admits. “But I have to try.”

There are a few tense moments of Estevez simply staring at her. Her eyes scan over her face as if looking for something in particular. Saga shows no pretense. She doesn’t like this, but she’s determined and she’s going to try whether she gets permission or not.

Estevez seems to realize that and releases a resigned sigh. “Alright. Go talk to Koskela. You have me as backup as long as you deny my involvement, if it comes to it.”

“Thank you,” Saga says, and she means it from the bottom of her heart. She can tell that Agent Estevez must be going against her bureau’s rules by helping her, so she’s grateful for the sentiment.

Estevez shakes her head. “Just go. And be careful.”

Saga doesn’t need to be told twice. She leaves Estevez with one last grateful nod before the smile slips away from her face. It’s immediately back to business. She’s given up all hope for any sort of break until this is all over.

Or until she dies. But as long as Logan’s life is in danger, dying isn’t an option.

She enters the cell block.

Inside, the air is stale and carries the faint stench of vomit. It’s as dark as ever, though upon entering her eyes are able to make out the figure hunched-over on the bench of one of the nearer cells.

Saga approaches warily.

“I’m sorry,” a voice says from further down. Wake. “I tried eating but it’s been so long and… I-I couldn’t… I’m sorry. I’ll clean it up.”

She doesn’t have eyes on Wake, meaning he most likely doesn’t have eyes on her yet. She can hear him shuffling around, probably trying to get a look at who just walked in. This time, however, Saga isn’t interested in Wake.

Ilmo slowly lifts his head from where it had been resting on his knees to look up at her and Saga notices that he’s abandoned his hat. His eyes are red and swollen and his deep frown exudes a silent fury.

“Where is he?” he asks in a low voice.

He knows. Saga can tell that he knows about Jaakko. She doesn’t know how he knows, whether it be through supernatural means or simply the instincts of an identical twin, but he knows.

She won’t hide it from him.

“I’m sorry,” is all she says.

“Saga?” Wake calls suddenly, his voice immediately perking up. “Is that you? Did you find the Clicker?”

Saga just observes Ilmo like a hawk, as if he’s the only other person in the room. The man is eerily silent.

Then he slams the metal cot with his fist with a loud clang and swears loudly, before a sob bursts out of him and he begins to mutter mournfully to himself in Finnish.

“I’m sorry,” Saga says again. Her twisted heart constricts even more because she’d been there at the time, and the guilt of not being able to save Jaakko returns full-swing as she watches his brother react to the news. In any FBI case, not just this one, informing the family of any deceased is the hardest part. Especially as a mother herself.

Ilmo wipes a hand over his face, leaving a slight sheen on his skin. He stands and walks over toward the bars. Saga has to once again fight the urge to take a step back. It’s surprising how much a hat (or, lack of) can change a person’s energy.

His fingers curl around the metal bars and he presses his face against them.

“How?” he grits out.

“He fell into Huotari Well,” Saga answers honestly. Her skin prickles from the tension in the limited space between the two of them. He's still acting in an aggressive way that seems strange to her, but she lets it slide knowing that grief can change a person. Ilmo curses again. He takes a few steps away from the bars and Saga releases the breath she’d been holding.

Alan calls out to her again. She continues to ignore him.

“I am truly, truly sorry, Ilmo. I can’t imagine how you’re feeling.”

His eyes snap up to meet hers alongside a curt response. “No, you can’t.”

She’s sure he didn’t mean it, but the comment pierces into her heart and cracks it open like an eggshell, revealing her suppressed emotion hidden inside. She does understand. Her daughter, her only child, is dead because of this stupid fucking story. She knows the feeling and, though she’d said she didn’t at first to be polite, anyone insinuating that she doesn’t makes her very, very angry.

Straight away, she quenches the feeling. She has to keep a clear head. She forces herself to speak levelly.

“I promise I’ll give you time to mourn later, but right now I really need your help. I need to perform a ritual.”

That seems to catch Ilmo’s attention. “What?”

“Saga?” Alan calls inquisitively. Saga can see him peering through the bars.

Ilmo also glances in his direction and sends him a scowl (was that a growl? What’s going on with him?) before turning back to Saga, suspicious. “Why? What sort of ritual, what are you doing?”

“The ritual with the heart that the cult have been doing. I need to give someone to the Dark Presence and have them be Taken to get someone back in return.”

Ilmo, tear-stricken face and all, looks at her with utter incredulousness.

“Okay, now I’m confused. You said like a whole three different things there.”

It’s Saga’s turn to feel confused. “What do you mean?”

“The ritual we’ve been doing involves a heart, sure,” Ilmo explains, “but why do you want to make Taken? The heart ritual is to kill them using the switch- or the Clicker, I guess. The second they emerge from the lake, we kill them. We protect the community. We're the good guys. What kind of a cult calls themselves a cult?”

That… makes a lot of pieces fall into place. Things hadn’t been lining up in Saga’s Mind Place, although reframing all the evidence with the idea that the Cult of the Tree were killing Taken helps it make much more sense.

“And if you’re trying to trade in one person for another, then uh… that’s a whole other thing.”

“That’s the one I need.” Saga says with no hesitation.

Ilmo visibly pales, even under the darkness of the cell block. “Uh… are you sure?”

“Does it involve dropping a heart into a well?”

“Well… yeah, but-”

“Then I’m sure.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?!” Alan shouts, his timid confusion finally erupting into explosive anger.

Saga approaches his cell. This time, Ilmo calls after her. “Wait, Saga-"

“I’m getting Casey back,” she tells Wake plainly. “After that, I’ll do as you say so you can bring back my daughter. And Ilmo’s brother.”

“You’re wasting time,” Alan hisses. “I can fix everything if you just give me the Clicker. It’ll let me rewrite reality to whatever you want, it’ll solve everything, just find it and get it to me. And what was that about a ritual?”

“You don’t remember telling me?”

All of Wake’s built up anger seems to evaporate in an instant. “I… huh?”

“I can’t help you.” Ilmo says suddenly, pulling Saga’s attention back toward him.

“You have to,” she says, hurrying back in his direction.

He shakes his head. “No, I can’t. It’s not because I don’t want to help you, I just can’t.”

“Why not?” Saga struggles to mask the frustration in her voice. This isn’t a hurdle she’d been expecting to face.

Ilmo sighs and scratches at his chin. “Okay, this might sound crazy, but Jaakko and I have dreams. Dreams where we’re, uh…”

“Not yourselves?” Saga finishes. “Jaakko explained it to me.”

She watches as Ilmo’s eyes well up with tears and he swallows down his emotion. When he next speaks, his voice is thick.

“We’ve been fighting,” he says. “I’ve been fighting to not be that man. And that ritual, the one with the heart and the well, I’ve seen it in my dreams. That’s why I can’t help you, Saga. I’m already… I didn’t mean to punch that guy, you tell him that. I just don't want it taking hold of me. I can’t be that man. ”

Saga can see where he’s coming from. She really wants to be able to leave him alone and mourn, but she needs his help. Does she feel guilty and slightly selfish? Yes, she does. At the end of the day, Casey is one man compared to the many that Wake could save if she just gave him the Clicker now.

Except that one man is Casey. It’s the textbook trolley problem and she’s trying to save everyone on those tracks. The odds aren’t in her favor, but she’s going to try. If that means Ilmo has to leave his comfort zone and Estevez has to break a few rules, so be it.

“You won’t be. You aren’t. You won’t have to do it all yourself, I’ll help you where I can. What are the steps?”

She doesn't voice her inner thought that Ilmo is already acting in a more aggressive manner.

Ilmo shifts uncomfortably. “I mean… I guess you’re right. The one in the dream is pretty unique, anyways. It needed a specific guy- the, um… right, the steps. Pretty straightforward. Cut out the heart while he’s- uh, they’re still alive, recite the chant, drop the heart into the well. Sacrifice vanishes and the rescued rises up.” He pauses. “Saga, are you planning on killing someone?”

“Someone that’s already becoming Taken.” It’s a lie, but it’s easier than explaining everything that’s going on with Kesä in one succinct sentence. Plus, if she phrases it like this, it might make Ilmo more inclined to help her.

“Right…” He still sounds hesitant.

Saga quickly changes the subject. “What’s the chant?”

“In the dream, it’s Finnish. In English it would be something like, um… ‘This is the ritual to lead you on. He returns and you’re locked in the room in turn.’”

All of Saga’s own hesitation about the ritual vanishes at that moment, replaced with relief and a bolster of determination. That’s exactly what she needs and is exactly what the other Wake described. Casey back and Kesä locked back in the Dark Place. She’s on the right track.

“I don’t want to do this, Saga.” Ilmo breaks through her thoughts.

“You’re performing a ritual?” Wake cuts in. “I swear there was something like that… I just can’t fucking remember…”

Saga leaves him to his rambling and tries her best to convey reassurance to the tense Ilmo. “I’ll be in your debt if you help me with this, Ilmo. Then we’ll talk things through and I’ll hear you out about what you and the cult were trying to do.”

“What?!” Alan yelps.

It seems to be against his own better judgment, but eventually Ilmo nods. “Fine, I’ll help. As long as you promise to stop me if I start acting like someone else. I have to be Ilmo Koskela.”

Despite everything, Saga gives him a small smile. “I promise. Thanks, Ilmo Koskela. I’ll have Agent Estevez talk to you about the specifics. I just need to make a quick stop at the nursing home, then we’ll make our way to Coffee World.”

She still fully intends to visit Tor and Odin. It had been her plan originally and Ahti mentioning it gave her the push she needed to actually complete that task.

Ilmo somehow looks even more uneasy at the prospect. “Coffee World? Huotari Well? Fuck, out of all places… You’d better make good on that promise.”

“I will. I’ll see you soon, Ilmo.”

Wake yells after her as she starts to leave. “Saga, wait! This isn’t right!”

Saga leaves. Until she’s ready to hand over the Clicker, she has nothing more to say to him.

aka the one where alan is kept out of the loop (literally? hmmm)

Thanks for reading!

#alan wake 2 #alan wake 2 spoilers #fanfic #saga anderson #kiran estevez #ilmo koskela #alan wake #alex casey #aleksi kesä #ilmari huotari #yötön yö #a piece of true fiction

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nancydrewwouldnever · 1 year

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Advocate January 2009 Interview

Chris Evans: Not Another Gay Interview

Chris Evans is a serious actor, but that doesn’t mean he wants you to stop objectifying him.

By Brandon Voss

January 05 2009 12:00 AM EST

After working a whipped-cream bikini in the 2001 spoof Not Another Teen Movie, Chris Evans fried phone lines in Cellular and melted hearts as The Human Torch in the Fantastic Four films. Next seen as a telekinetic troublemaker in February’s sci-fi thriller Push, the 27-year-old revisits his steamiest photo shoot and outs his even hotter gay brother.

This may come as quite a shock, but gay men enjoy you. I was well aware of that. I remember my mother saying, “Chris, do you know you’re #2 on some gay list [AfterElton.com’s Hot 100]. Brad Pitt is #12!” I was like, “What?!” I couldn’t believe it.

That was 2007. I hate to break bad news, but you dropped to #8 in ’08. Aww, that’s outrageous! Who took my spot?

I forget, but Jake Gyllenhaal was #1 for both years. What? Jake? Unacceptable. [Laughs]

It couldn’t hurt to play a gay role next. I really wanted to be a part of Milk, but I lost out to James Franco. I guess if you’ve got to lose, he’s the guy to lose to. I did a movie called Fierce People where I played a sociopath who wasn’t gay, but he does rape a teenage boy. You come to find out he didn’t do it for sexual reasons; he just did it because he could. He really was a sick character.

I’ve actually got an idea for a gay musical sequel to Cellular called Blackberry Storm. You in? Absolutely. Sounds like a nailbiter.

I hear there might also be a queer subtext in Push. Yes, those with powers try to keep it under wraps. They’re being hunted by the government, so everyone’s trying to lay low. Now I understand the gay man’s struggle. [Laughs]

What’s the status of your Tennessee Williams film, The Loss of a Teardrop Diamond, about a 1920’s Memphis debutante? We took it to the Toronto Film Festival looking for distribution, and it does not look like that’s going to happen. I don’t know if there’s really a market for a Tennessee Williams film. It would’ve been a tough film to distribute and make money back, so it’s probably going to remain in limbo and possibly come out one day on DVD.

Do you blame Lindsay Lohan, who was originally set to star before Bryce Dallas Howard took over? [Laughs] No, not at all. To be honest, Bryce was phenomenal in the movie. It’s a shame that people won’t get to see her performance.

Let’s discuss your sexy, now-infamous 2004 Flaunt magazine photo shoot — and why you seem more hesitant to flaunt your physique. I really didn’t think twice about taking my shirt off at the time, but my current publicist would pull her hair out if I did that photo shoot today. If I got to a photo shoot and they said, “OK, we’re going to do some shirtless shots,” I’d say, “Fine. No big deal.” It never really occurred to me that that could be misinterpreted as a bad thing or as selling out.

Do you think those photos hurt you? I couldn’t care less, and I don’t think it makes one lick of difference. But I hired my publicist for her professional opinion, and she seems to think it’s a mistake. I have no problem taking my shirt off for a role if the part calls for it, but my publicist says, “When you’re promoting yourself, being you, there’s a way to keep it as classy as possible. Greasing yourself up and stripping down may not be the best way to do it.” To some degree, she may have a point. But at the end of the day, it didn’t bother me then and it doesn’t bother me now. Maybe I dropped to #8 because I haven’t had enough shirtless photo shoots lately. I’m blaming my publicist. [Laughs]

When you need an ego boost, do you ever watch the Chris Evans tribute videos on YouTube? No, I just call my mother. When you’re feeling depressed, you talk to her for 20 minutes and you think your shit doesn’t stink. And you can quote me on that.

I read on PerezHilton.com that your younger brother Scott is gay. Yes, I do have a gay brother. I’m down with the gays. Mostly I’m hanging out with him and his gay buddies, who are fucking hilarious. They’re the funniest people I know.

Do they take you to gay bars? They’ve invited me out to gay bars before, and I said, “Look, guys, I’ve got to draw the line there.” That’s where a photo will get taken, it will run in magazines, and before you know it, I’ll be living down the gay rumor for the rest of my life.

Does your brother look anything like you? He does, but he’s about an inch taller and about four shades tanner than I am. He’s a very fit young man. Believe me, he does quite well for himself.

How did he come out to you? He was really nervous. He came out to all of us very slowly. His first year at NYU, he came out to our mother and our sister, and then he came out to me a little later. I was driving him back to New York City for school. We spent the whole day together, got to the city, had some beers in my hotel room, got into a really great talk, and he came out. I was so glad that he did. That’s got to be a difficult transition, but I come from the most liberal household you have ever heard of. And for some reason, gay men are just drawn to my mother. She’s a cool chick. I think, like, six men have come out to her. I guess they just feel so comfortable with her, and before you know it, they’re coming out of the closet. I think my mother was praying for us to be gay, so at least she got one of us.

Growing up, when was the first time you realized that you weren’t gay? When I had a crush on my babysitter, who lived with us for a few years. I must’ve been 10 or 11. I was just head-over-heels in love with her. I thought she was the greatest thing in the world. Then I had a really big crush on Kim Cattrall in Mannequin. I was in love with her too.

In May 2008, you were photographed wearing a T-shirt with an image of two girls making out. Was that your way of showing support for gay marriage? My buddy owns a clothing line in L.A, and that’s one of the T-shirts that he makes. To be completely honest, I threw it on without really taking a close enough look at it. On that day I ended up getting photographed at a clothing store — which rarely happens to me — and then on the way home, I get in a car accident. So I’m dealing with police, the ambulance, taking down names and numbers, all while wearing a shirt with two women tonguing each other. It was a rough day. As for gay marriage, it’s mindboggling and appalling that human beings are being denied civil rights in this country. But time will heal all. I have to believe that in 10 years we won’t be having this conversation. We’ll be having another one, because we’ll always find someone to persecute.

2008 was arguably the Year of the Man-crush. Who was yours? My buddies always tell me that I have a man-crush on Brad Pitt. What can I say? The guy’s great. I think he’s a great fuckin’ actor, and he’s versatile as all hell. I’ve never seen a movie I didn’t like him in. So I guess he’s my man-crush.

When I interviewed Milo Ventimiglia for The Advocate, he told me about performing “I Will Survive” in drag for the short-lived 2000 TV series Opposite Sex. He failed to mention that you were one of his two backup dancers. [Laughs] I’ll tell you the worst part. Milo and Kyle [Howard] look like the ugliest transvestites in the world; meanwhile, I think I pass! I look like an alright-looking woman! It was horrible walking from the makeup trailer to the set. I was ogled, getting catcalls, and being sized-up. It was very demeaning. I could definitely relate to what women must go through.

Have you done drag since? No. Unless you want to count the blue tights in Fantastic Four.

By the way, “flame on!” was typically reserved for flamboyant homosexuals before you stole it as your Fantastic Four catchphrase. Sorry, guys. Well, you knocked me down to #8. I had to steal something.

#interview #2009 #advocate interview #chris evans #scott evans

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