#something something romanticizing ones own suffering etc etc

[fivepebble]

ithink my friends are tired of hearing about my endless hfjone thoughts so you guys are getting them today.

with the waiting room and how it warps based on your desires, i think charlotte coming back into ONE with the mold, and subsequently likely having it in the waiting room after she died, was a really important insight to her character. she didn't want it to just magically get removed, so it wasn't. it was so important for her to deal with it by herself that she attached it to her identity and could not let it go. maybe i'm thinking too far into it but SO MUCH of ONE is based on little subtle details like that, especially with airy explicitly pointing it out afterwards, i feel like it was intentional. i think about it a lot

#fptext #something something romanticizing ones own suffering etc etc #i love her so much :( #hfjone

[nerdylilpeebee]

it gives me hope to see someone who doesn't let themselves be swayed by the romanticism of rooting for an underdog (or more accurately, a very carefully crafted image of an underdog) and actually bothers to check facts

i see so much support for gaza among my peers and you blog makes me feel a little less alone... a little less insane

someone else sees it

Yeah, I honestly see the support for Gaza (really, Hamas, cuz really supporting Gaza would require being against what Hamas is doing and wanting Hamas to be removed from power, which is the opposite of what pro Palestine people are doing) EVERYWHERE. Making it confusing that some of them seem to think they're being censored, which I'm honestly convinced is a manipulation tactic, but anyway...

I have even seen people, some of them mutuals, who I know are good people reblog and spread the constant lies and propaganda every day. That's part of why I'm pushing so hard into it. Because the propaganda is working. It is making good people decide the terrorists are the right people to support because innocent people are dying in direct response to the terrorists' actions. It makes them ignore that Hamas openly admits that this is on purpose, that they intend for the innocent people of Gaza to suffer and die. It makes it so that Hamas, who is willing to lie about how many have suffered and even attach faces of even their own victims to propaganda pieces saying "Oh look at what Israel did," and even FORCE THEIR OWN HOSTAGES to wave and smile at them as they're released in order to paint the picture that Israel is the villain, can make people believe they are the good guys despite killing innocent people and admitting to using Gaza as a human shield.

They have MASTERED the art of propaganda. And I refuse to let it go un-called-out. I refuse to let people on the internet literally helping spread these lies by making their own up, or manipulating information (by leaving out a detail, changing a detail, straight up just lying that something like tunnels near the ocean is impossible despite it being 100% possible, etc) go un-called-out.

Tho, I will have to be honest, I may force myself to slow down a bit now. I had a bit of a stress response at work today. I doubt it was just about this stuff, but it no doubt added to it as I am very passionate about this subject. And I really don't wanna repeat this stress response. Health issues is not something I want to come about simply because I am stressed.

So I may have to back off a bit. But I am still 100% on the side of "both sides have shitty things they've done, but Hamas is literally the one who started this, killed countless innocents, and kidnapped a LOT of innocent people, including literal infants (something there is no precedent for, I might add. No one's ever really taken literal babies hostage like this before), and I will not condemn Israel for retaliating. I will, however, push for peace as regardless it is a fucking tragedy that people are dying and it NEEDS to stop. And it really can't until Hamas is removed. They keep breaking the ceasefires, all throughout the history of this region. Long-standing peace is not possible with them in power."

That got very long-winded. XD sorry.

#gaza #hamas #israel #arab israeli conflict #palestine #tvp discourse

[melrosing]

What if brienne's mom was still alive? How much of her character/story would change? And what do u imagine their relationship would be like? 🧐

sorry for the late reply! I think I’ve written something on this before but im on mobile and i know im never gonna find it so. this is mostly hcs:

for whatever reason I’ve always imagined Brienne’s mother as a quiet, daydreamy person who doesn’t smile much but somehow exudes warmth anyway. Selwyn I imagine as having been a big character in his youth but he turns inwards after the loss of Cyril (my hc name for her) and their children. but anyway they were an odd couple in their youth but it kind of worked

the main thing she and Brienne share is a passion for stories, songs and poetry: I think Brienne gets her romanticism from her mother, and Cyril knows a lot about stormlands folklore etc and Brienne is always eager to hear about. they go on walks about the island together to see supposed sites of magic

otoh i think Cyril would be aware that Brienne looks different to other girls but her approach is just to never comment on it. which is fine at first but hard for Bri in adolescence bc she kind of needs Cyril to say she knows she’s different and that’s fine, but Cyril thinks if she says nothing then Brienne will never even realise

Brienne still would have suffered the insults of someone like Septa Roelle, who is more than happy to tell her precisely the ways she’s different, but she doesn’t want to tell her mother bc she’s scared of Cyril confirming it’s all true so unfortunately that never gets addressed

hc that Cyril living means Selwyn maintains his big personality to a greater extent, and he’s warmer towards Brienne as a result. but he’s often distracted by his role as the Evenstar so Bri doesn’t confide much in him EITHER

you know I guess it all really depends on what kind of person Brienne’s mother was in terms of what impact she would’ve had on Brienne’s story. I think she and Brienne would’ve been warm towards one another but not similar people, so she can’t necessarily heal all of Brienne’s hurts and Renly’s kindness is still enough to drive her to join his train

I don’t picture Cyril trying to stop Brienne leaving, she thinks it’s kind of romantic. but Selwyn being less inward in this AU, he does try to stop her as his only heir and that creates a rift between them. maybe that results in Brienne being more resolute about not returning till she wishes, or less so idk. but in short my hc is that Brienne got away with much of her nonconformity through the emotional absence of Selwyn who is too lost in grief to pay her enough attention

maybe in the least, Brienne doesn’t immediately feel so strongly tied to Catelyn, with whom I think there’s a slightly maternal relationship going on? bc she doesn’t lack a mother, that bond doesn’t feel so urgent as it does in ACOK, for either of them: Brienne subconsciously looking for the presence of a maternal figure, Catelyn missing her own children terribly and especially her daughters

idk hope this helps

#ask #brienne of tarth #cyril swann #selwyn tarth #asoiaf

[hrshlandfunkypics]

As much as Koisenu Futari is a show about love, or the lack thereof, it also does show how it can show up in many ways.

The focus is aromanticism and asexuality, yes, but also, we see the different points of view of the people around and how they relate to those types of love.

We have the junior, who thought that there was a spark between them and instead of dealing with the rejection and misunderstanding like a man he just... took some time off work and asked to change departments.

We have Minori (the sister) who seems to live the perfect romantic life and is following what society (and her parents) ask of her, and at the end, despite her love and her dutiful follow of those rules, she's being cheated on and breaks from what society demands (the divorce).

We have Kazu, who sees romantic love in a very weird lense (in my opinion) but slowly, while still holding his ideals, he understands that others are not necessarily like him and not only he ends up by respecting them and more or less understanding them, but he also is a (somewhat) good ally.

We have Chizuru, who does love but is lesbian. She is bound (through her love for Sakuko) to suffer because of a love that cannot be reciprocated. We see her deeply love and feel, and yet we do not see this love being satisfied.

A good point here is that the blame is not brought to Sakuko. Chizuru clearly says that she, herself, is the one to love and the one to get away because she rather have a friend live her life without having to worry about something she doesn't care about than forcing an unwanted love on her (Sakuko).

We have Sakuko's parents too, who seem to live the perfect traditional life. The mother doesn't seem too old, which would suggest that she followed the advice she gave to her daughters: marry and have children young. And through the series, she shows rejection, because aromanticism doesn't fit her understanding of life, then a slight acceptation: she still doesn't get it and wishes for Sakuko to marry and have children, but she also understands that cutting ties with her daughter for not accepting her making her own choices is stupid at worse, foolish at best, especially since at the end she just wants her daughter to be happy.

Last but not least, we have Takahashi. He is the textbook of "older queer" as in he knows where he stands, he understands how he feels about what, he has a way to show and share his experience to others (the blog), he clearly is used (and bored/annoyed) by the world's romanticism etc and he had cut ties with his parents. We don't have much on the parents' thing, but, or he left them because he couldn't be bothered with them being such a pain, or his parents rejected him because he's aroace. Either way, he is a pillar for Sakuko while she goes through her own aroace journey.

So at the end, we not only have a show about aromanticism and asexuality, but we also see how this pressure, this allocisheteronormativity of society, makes it hard on everyone and not just those who do not fit/do not follow those invisible rules.

The aroace narrative is wholesome and very well done, but it would be foolish to turn a blind eye on those other details (and growth) of the characters, which makes this series punch you in the gut so hard.

#Koisenu Futari #恋せぬふたり

[thatsingingpsycho]

—a café in Berlin Mitte, 2023

My best friend once asked me, 'Why did you write so many songs about him? Do you think you're romanticizing things in life that hurt?'

Another person asked me after I told them I have feelings for them and I don't expect anything in return, 'So you just want to suffer?'

Since then, I've been questioning my writing and the reasons behind it—my songs, my poetry, my essays. I had to put them all under a microscope.

I suppose nobody wants to suffer, but I've learned the hard way that you cannot love someone into loving you. And it hurts like hell. It feels as if you're standing at a door to which you don't have the keys. You're fumbling through your pockets, desperately trying to find a way in. Your insecurity is devouring you with certainty, screaming that you're never going to be good enough for them.

According to Schopenhauer, human will—desire, craving, etc.—is the root of suffering. A temporary escape from this pain is through aesthetic contemplation. Essentially, this dude suggests that escaping pain can occur through appreciating beauty. During this experience, you shift from focusing on everyday objects to perceiving timeless and ideal concepts. In this state, you don't feel separate from what you observe; it's as if the object exists on its own, and you and the perception become one. Subject and object blend, and you grasp the fundamental Idea. This type of understanding doesn't concern itself with how objects relate in terms of time, space, or cause and effect; it's all about being fully absorbed in the object. Art is the practical result of this brief encounter with aesthetic contemplation, as it aims to portray the fundamental Ideas of the world. So I wondered, is this what I've been doing?

A few weeks ago, I sat in the same seat where Hemingway wrote 'A Farewell to Arms.' I imagined how he brought Frederic and Catherine to life. For a moment, I envied them for their idyllic quiet life in the mountains, their deep love, and their willingness to risk everything for it, until I remembered how tragically it all ended. I started laughing. I knew I had circled back to square one—life, death, Eros, Logos. (Sorry, Freud!)

This isn't just a story about someone who crawled inside my head and set a fire there. It's also a story about how I love him, something he couldn't (and took me a while to) understand. Right now, I'm still standing at a door to which I don't have the keys. Sometimes I'm fumbling through my pockets, trying to find a way in. I haven't desperately banged my fists against the door, asking to be invited in, but I might do it one day. I don't know a lot of things, but I do know that you're not supposed to run from love. Really looking forward to the day when you can read this one. XO, D.

#short essay #songwriter #falling in love #arthur schopenhauer #life #death #short story preview #ernest hemingway #writers on tumblr #a farewell to arms #simone de beauvoir #todestrieb

[peachmi1k]

hey guys. i can’t believe i actually have to make a post like this, but it apparently really needs to be said because some of y’all don’t know how to act right. trigger warning for self harm, suicide, and cursing cause i’m mad af

lately some of my mutuals have been getting some asks that simply aren’t okay, ie requesting they write things about reader being admitted to the psych ward, etc.

i genuinely cannot fathom how anyone thinks that’s an appropriate thing to ask for from a stranger on the internet. you might think it’s quirky and cute but some of us have genuine issues that are absolutely disgusting of you to be trying to romanticize like this.

i have had severe depression for my entire teenage and adult life. i lost my best friend to suicide when i was 17. pain from something like that never ever goes away. another one of my best friends tried to unalive herself when i was 22. i worry about her every day. before finally being medicated at 18 i was going through the absolute hardest time of my life regarding my mental health, and surprise, it wasn’t fucking fun.

i have to assume that the people sending in these asks have no clue what its like to be in this situation or don’t know anyone who has, because if you did, you would know that shit like this shouldn’t be talked about this way.

and i will say, i am a firm believer that you are welcome to cope with your own trauma however you see fit, as long as you are not hurting anyone. yes, i joke about my own trauma with my close friends, because its mine, and however i choose to make myself feel better, i’ve earned that right.

but there are still boundaries that must be respected when it comes to things like this. i know that joking with my very close friends will not make them uncomfortable, because they too share some of the same trauma as me.

however, an account you follow because you like their writing is someone who you know very very little about. we choose what we get to share on social media, and extremely sensitive topics like this need to be respected in the presence of someone you know next to nothing about.

you don’t know if the people you’re asking these things of have been in this situation, and it’s extremely dangerous to assume you can joke about thinks like this with people you don’t know. you could genuinely fucking hurt someone.

people who are actually admitted to a psych ward are people that struggle just living a day to day life. its not a fucking vacation, they are suffering and they need help. and some of you, sending in your stupid fucking asks like “omg being lovey dovey with cc in a mental institution” is so insulting its insane.

grow the fuck up. this isn’t wattpad 2012 core, mental illness isn’t a “just girly things uwu” quirk. its real, and its serious. attempt to see someone else’s perspective. step into the real world for one fucking second and get yourself a reality check.

if you disagree with anything i’ve just said, don’t let me catch you on this blog. as max said, if this makes you angry then it fucking should. you are not welcome here.

#judah.txt #psa

[juneviews]

Hi Axelle! Big fan of your channel btw, I watch your video about IPYTM just to get mad sometimes(my resentment towards that show is astronomical).

I've always wanted to move abroad, Seoul being the goal but I want to keep my options open. I know you have several videos about living in Thailand but I'd really love to hear more about your experience. Quality of life, language barrier, weather, expenses, xenophobia, visas, housing, pests, healthcarejob opportunities basically anything! Thank you so so much🙏🏻

Hope you have a fabulous New Year 🎊♥️

hi, thank you so much it means a lot! 🥰 glad to know someone hates ipytm as much as I do lmaooo! ok so let me do it point by point!

quality of life: much higher than living in france. rent is like 4x cheaper for way newer buildings with great amenities such as a pool & a gym, I can order food every day without breaking the bank, and bkk is such a lively city there's always so many cool things to do there for not crazy expensive! I would NEVER be able to afford my lifestyle here in bkk if I was back in paris, and the hot weather also makes it so I don't suffer from seasonal depression which is HUGE!

language barrier: I'm the only foreigner I know who speaks thai, and my foreigner friends have no trouble getting around relying on english. bangkok is one of the most expat-friendly cities ever imo!

weather: the weather is extremely hot in thailand, very humid & also it rains a lot and rainy season is no joke. however I prefer this weather over the french weather bc the sunlight we get everyday no matter the season is 12 hours a day, which is huge when in paris we can go from 14 hours of sunlight in summer, to only 6 in winter. again, really helped with my seasonal depression. also, I can go to my building's pool year round lol! the heat is not for everyone, but personally I feel like I'm on vacation year round & it has done wonders for my mental health!

expenses: as I said, bangkok is much cheaper than paris. however, with thailand's economic boom in recent decades, it's not dirt cheap either like the idea many people had like 10 or 20 years ago. the biggest thing where I really save the most money is rent, but transport is actually more expensive than paris, and imported things are unbelievably expensive. still, I live a very comfortable lifestyle with 800 euros a month, whereas to live the same exact lifestyle in france I'd need like 2000 euros.

xenophobia: there is barely any xenophobia in thailand. in fact, I'd argue that there is a romanticization of foreigners here, especially white ones. however, there are a lot of barriers to being a foreigner in thailand. getting the citizenship seems relatively hard, getting a job as a foreigner is unbelievably hard since the business visa needs to be renewed every 2 months which annoys employers, if you start your business in thailand, you can only own 49% of your own business while a thai person owns the majority, etc. most of the difficulties are legal & related to immigration, but thai people don't discriminate against foreigners. however, they will always tend to see you as a tourist & will try to scam you way more than a thai person, no matter how long you live in thailand... as expressed in videos, as a foreigner, you'll never be seen as a thai citizen, even if you spend your entire life in thailand, and that sucks...

visas: they're hell. as said before, business visas are like the shortest in the world, you can't have that many tourist visas, and the only visas that are easy to obtain are study visas (bc you pay a lot), or retirement visas that last 10 YEARS (bc they pay a lot.) however, thailand seems to slowly be relaxing its visa system, so there's hope.

housing: very easy to find something cheap, I found my 2 apartments in under 2 weeks each time, whereas it'd take me months in paris for a shittier place.

pests: first apartment had lizards, new one has insects...

healthcare: no healthcare as a tourist unless you got an insurance. now that I'm a student at the most prestigious thai uni, I have a lot of free services with the related hospital & health center. I also bought my own insurance so I'm pretty much safe. still is shocking coming from a country with completely free healthcare lol.

job opportunities: finding jobs as a foreigner is AWFUL & idk how I'm gonna find one once I graduate lol, I hope my professors can help me 😅

hope that helped, & I hope you get to do everything you're setting out to do 💜 happy new year ✨️

xxx

#answers #axelle goes to thailand #thailand

[genericpuff]

…Here is something a bit more serious I wanted to ask…

How do feel when it comes the fact that plenty of sexual themes inside LO are being told incorrectly to a young audience (I keep hearing on how most of Webtoon readers are still around 12-16 year old girls)?

Specially with the fact that Rachel keeps on sexualizing Persephone after some scenes showcasing her trauma….

I hope I’m not overstepping my boundaries here…thanks again for listening.

You're not overstepping at all ! This is actually a topic I've gone off about in the past at length on reddit and in chatrooms like Discord so I'm always happy to divulge about it and talk about it. It's a problem that goes way bigger than LO but I'll try my best to keep it focused on LO for the sake of getting to the point.

Before I get into it, obligatory TRIGGER WARNING for discussion surrounding sexual trauma/abuse/etc. and how it's romanticized and marketed in Webtoons media.

There are so many comics in Webtoons library that are just skeevy beyond belief for the stories they're trying to tell. Whether it's gratuitous oversexualization of its characters to the point of being absurd, to the implications of the romances in these stories that often border on non-consensual/toxic, Webtoons seems to be using these types of things as its main draw in a lot of their "big money" series - or at least, the ones they tend to market the most.

Now don't get me wrong, I've got a strong stomach for weird/creepy/dark shit and I'm capable of having suspension of disbelief when reading stories like this. I'm an SA survivor myself but despite this, I'm no stranger to dark romance or stories that 'toe the line' or even overstep it completely between morally acceptable and morally apprehensible, a lot of these kinds of stories have actually helped me overcome and heal from what I've been through. Suspension of disbelief is important and this is, after all, fiction, where we as creators are able to explore taboo or 'forbidden' topics in ways that either interest us or empower us or just feel like fun to write.

But there's still a line to be drawn because I'm an adult person who has literary analysis skills and is capable of picking apart these stories and what they might be consciously - or subconsciously - teaching us or portraying. Kids and teens? They basically are what they eat. This isn't to say teenagers are stupid or anything of the sort, but I was a kid too once and I know I internalized a lot of media that I straight up shouldn't have been consuming at the time. And I do think a lot of webtoons on the WT platform specifically dangerously veer into that territory all for the purpose of money and clout.

Again, don't get me wrong, I love morally questionable or otherwise abrasive characters, I think they're fun to write and fiction is a great way to explore those kinds of dynamics (and I've had pals weirdly thank me for how much suffering I put my characters through LMAO). But I'm also not gonna sit here and bullshit people into thinking my main projects are meant for teens. They're not. My main protagonists are in a shitty toxic relationship that should not be romanticized. My main character is a hyperbolic self-insert reflection of how awful I used to be as a person and how I was at the center of all my own problems for years. You should be 18 at minimum if you want to read my work because the stuff I write about isn't appropriate for or wouldn't be able to be observed and accepted as just fiction the way most mature adults can.

Now I'm not saying my work is "deep" or anything like that, it's stupid fun weeb shit. But it's the kind of stupid fun weeb shit I wouldn't want a teenager internalizing or taking to heart. It's why I'll include plenty of disclaimers to remind people that my stuff is a work of fiction and I simply enjoy exploring these kinds of tropes and dynamics through my characters, but I do not condone their behavior or the things I represent in my work. I fully respect other creators and writers who do the same.

Rachel is not one of those people. Rachel doesn't do this. She tries to claim to be progressive while completely misrepresenting the things she writes. She doesn't actually care about these topics, she just wants you to think she cares about them. Don't get me wrong, there are other series on the platform that are absolutely problematic when it comes to this sort of thing (Webtoons looooves marketing them, blech) but Lore Olympus is the absolute pinnacle of irresponsible, the sum of everything that's wrong with Webtoons.

It gets constant special treatment - often times being put in the banner reel every time it updates and in the prime spots no less that are rarely ever given to other - far more thought-provoking and well-written - series that could really use the ad space.

It markets itself to kids and teens despite having subject matter that either isn't handled responsibly OR should be taken with a level of suspension of disbelief that a lot of teens/kids aren't capable of having.

And the subject matter that it does try to handle responsibly is flubbed entirely because they're leaving it up to the writing 'skills' of a privileged white woman from New Zealand who's either never lived these experiences or, those that she has, couldn't even write them into a narrative when she tries because she still exists with internalized biases that completely miss the mark because she's never tried to look at things with a viewpoint outside of her own.

She's just not a writer, full stop. But because it's Webtoon's golden goose, they market the shit out of it anyways and give it preferential treatment. And of course, they market it to kids and teens because it's cute and colorful, and kids and teens will be more likely to overlook its blatant problems because they don't have the literary analysis skills yet to identify them.

The other side of the coin they market to? The adults who don't think these problems are problems to begin with. These are the same adults who celebrated 50 Shades of Grey and After as if they're masterworks of fiction. Overall very shitty, problematic people. At least the teenagers have the potential to "grow out of it". The adults who defend Rachel like their life depends on it are grown up but not mature or empathetic in the slightest towards those who have found their own stories and experiences trivialized or otherwise misrepresented completely through LO.

I know, that's undoubtedly a lot of hot takes, but this is such a massive problem in romance stories today. I get it, it's "drama", and it's been around since the harlequin novels of old, but the way it's pushed and romanticized and presented as if it's somehow "couple goals" by the people - often women - who write them is getting to be exhausting.

At this point I put Rachel Smythe right up there with Anna Todd and EL James - ego-driven female "writers" who wrote shitty fanfiction that got a lot of views and happened to fail upwards in their success, but when you dig past the subscriber count numbers and the clout, they themselves are not that profound or well-read in any meaning of the word. They're just people with huge deeply-rooted issues who write problematic romances instead of going to therapy.

And that's all I'm gonna say on that.

#lore olympus critical #anti lore olympus #antiloreolympus #lo critical #ama #ask me anything #sorry btw if that doesn't answer your question #i kinda just went off there because it's def a hill i'm willing to die on #webtoons advertising their creepy romance shit to teens and kids fucking sucks and it's everything that i hate about the webtoon industry r

[candylitaaa]

IZ HeadCanon: Irken romance & friendship

Long post! And possibly bad translated cuz i used *cof* Google *cof* this time

The irkens are incapable of feeling love romantically but it doesn't mean that it does not exist, even if it is different from that of humans. The irkens are people of pure warlike ambition, galactic conquest and selfishness (Issue 50), but they have their way of relating despite this. For example, Zim knows what weddings, the concept of love and friendship are (Issue 20, 50 and episodes of the series), but he knows that his species does not put it into practice like humans. To begin with, one of the differences is that they don't exactly use the words "love" and "friendship" to describe it, but instead use "alliance" and "companions" (In this HC of course) In Issue 20 Zim changes the word " marriage" for "i would annihilate last" and also said "Irkens only love galactic conquest, snacks and the suffering of it's enemies", so i see it like see somebody with hate and see somebody with less hate.

☺When an irken meets another they find themselves in a neutral relationship in which it can begin negatively (fights, insults, etc.) or positively (decent greetings, kindness [possibly], etc.). If both of them continue to meet and talk positively they could become "Allies". Allies for them, within a relationship, is almost the same as saying "friendship" for us. This could be because:

1-They begin to no longer see it necessary to fight often among themselves (even in companionship and alliances they fight, it's their nature) 2-They believe that the other is an idiot but has a "decent conscience", so they do not ignore each other. At least not so much 3-They begin to like the other's evil personality in general 4-Some or all of the above

☺If they remain allies for a while, they may or may not become "Companions." For them, have someone's company in social relationships is like saying "love", "boyfriends" and other things related to romanticism. The fact of calling it "companion" is because having a very competitive and destructive nature no matter what makes us understand, in some way, that precisely with that irken, hatred does not appear too much. This could be because:

1-The natural hatred they had before is slightly more null, making them patient with each other (The hatred is partly maintained, as explained before) 2-They feel or strongly believe that with that irken they become unstoppable in general 3-The evil or cunning that the other has becomes interesting instead of annoying or just pleasant 4-Between invaders: they feel or strongly believe that when together they are an unstoppable duo that can conquer several planets without problems (Yes or yes there must be one of the above mentioned) 5-Some or all of the above

If their companionship lasts too long and they are irkens who consider themselves strong, they have the possibility of cloning and combining their DNA to create a "Smeet" ("Smeet" is a baby irken). Since they do not have reproductive systems, the only way to create life is through cloning.

☺Things to highlight:

1-They use the words "Companions" and "Alliances" to describe their relationships as well as to say "I know you are my enemy but to defeat him we need a temporary alliance" or similar, making the interpretation depends on the context.

2-Just because they are incapable of feeling romantic love/sexual attraction does not mean that they do not give each other kisses, hugs, praise, go on dates and so on. It is not seen often because they do not usually see the point or need, but some Irkens do not mind trying to do one or more of the mentioned in their own way (Praise like "I know I am the best but I think you are almost comparable to me" [ comparative and challenging but with a friendly tone], hugs that look uncomfortable or nice but short, quick kisses on the cheeks [depending on the irken it can be on the hand, mouth, etc.] and dates that involve the destruction/anger of something or someone that they share in common [getting angry with someone they hate in common, destroying objects for fun and in the case of a relationship between invaders, making fun of those who rule thanks to them]). The Pak only blocks romantic, sexual attraction and in some cases friendship, but part of their culture since before the creation of that technology carried out these activities (in a more loving way for obvious reasons). That's one of the reasons why they know them. Then there are strange cases where when visiting a world where they put this into practice, they begin to like it and do it with their partner.

3- Some Irkens, when they have an alliance that they like enough to give way to companionship but do not want to be one, call themselves "Strong Allies", known as "Strong Alliance". It's the same as saying "best friends" to us. They don't want to fight often, thinks the other have a cool and interesting evil personality, likes to do anything with them and so on, but prefer to stay in an Alliance (being best friends).

#i hope everything is well written and not confusing LMAO #i wanted to share this hc i have before publish my fic #iz #invader zim #iz headcanon #iz headcanons #headcanon #my headcanons #my headcanon #irken

[stylecouncil]

one thing I really really love about pressure machine is that so many esp modern writing about the working class almost tries to venerate or up lift, romanticize, which don’t get me wrong there’s a little bit, there’s obviously an appreciation for the dirt under your fingernails etc etc but the veneration somehow ends up feeling lacking, or in some cases even reactionary when you look at the state of 2000s - 2010s -2020s country etc etc, like cleaned up saccharine repetition of bootstrap ideology or some hollow call to the idea of god without any theological depth or nuance or actual exploration of why religion is so rooted in the dna of so many small towns (literally see: gods own country) they just aren’t dark enough, aren’t encompassing of the messy reality, they’re watered down, they’re not real. this album almost feels anti reactionary, it almost feels like it’s directly addressing the modern state of this kind of storytelling (and the album had several places where it seems to play with this idea/directly address it). it’s not an agenda pushing hollow toothless canonization of the working class man it’s a kind of conflicted condemnation of the world/mankind/system that created these wheels of suffering and an attempt to try to grapple with a god and such a profound belief in a god amongst all the suffering. pressure machine starts with a tale of someone who threw his whole life away on a possession charge, he’s not a bad guy, he’s not even really a cautionary tale, he’s just a reality. the albums protagonists aren’t perfect upstanding versions of the working family man. his actions don’t match up with his ideology “if there really is judgement, when he pulls my chart, he’ll reject my actions, but he will know my heart! he’ll prepare a place for me where happiness instills, where the light puts its living hands on my head (a reference to he earlier vignette of him playing as child). they got me for possession of enough to kill the horses that run free in the west hills. free in the west hills” immediately we cut into quiet town a song that’s chorus COULD ALMOST double as a song like you would hear on modern country radio (I think this is totally intentional) for example but almost every verse is a jumbled mess of children being hit by trains and parents burying their children dying of heroin overdoses (somebody’s been keeping secrets in this quiet town) so you get this thrilling little juxtaposition that you think is maybe resolved by the end of song, maybe we’ll give way to some celebration, until, no, the last thing mentioned is the train again. gods kingdom, gods country, isn’t a good place to be, it’s a pressure machine. that’s just the practical reality. so many characters aren’t reaching to god because they even know all that much about what they’ve been taught or because they even feel it’s relational or even aligns with their actions, it’s all they have. it’s a an aching of there’s got to be something else, something better, all this suffering has to mean something. (“we keep on waiting for the miracle to come” and well it never does) the album doesn’t even seem necessarily sure if it does or if it really is just about getting through and about how hope is sometimes all that can you there (the getting by), it seems at the same time completely combined and also steeped in doubt, just like the characters it portrays, just like cut up pieces of the real diner interviews from people in the town that it places between most songs (absolutely in love with this choice which if done wrong could have felt like a chore or out place but is somehow perfect). It just feels perfectly constructed. I don’t even know where I’m going with this it’s just been a long time since I’ve been that impressed with an album.

[kestalsblog]

Things to Keep in Mind While Writing Poetry: for "Pretentious Poets"

(Long Post)

Let's start this off with an important reminder. In poetry, we should never assume "I" or any first-person pronouns are the same as the poet/author. They relate to the speaker of the poem, who may or may not be the poet. The speaker is like a characer in a story. With that being said, be prepared for many readers to conflate the two no matter what - and let's be honest, many times you do intend the "I" in poems to be you, the poet.

In poetry, there is a tendency to meditate on philosophical concepts, right? And something interesting often happens when we meditate on the meaning of life, the nature of man, etc., etc. We get big egos. We get pretentious and think we have all the right answers and start blaming everyone else, developing a "me vs. them" mentality even if we don't mean to.

This can lead our poems to sound pretentious, preachy, or more arrogant than we intend. In attempting to condemn what we see wrong and rewrite reality to mach our own ideals, we forget that we too are often responsible of the same vices of which we accuse our fellow human beings.

This habit can lead us to do many harmful things in poetry, including but not limited to the below:

Imposing our own thoughts on other living things (including animals, which are definitely not sharing our same thoughts and perspectives). I recommend reading "The Fish" by Elizabeth Bishop if you want a fantastic example of a poem that uses an animal to talk about human ideas and then by the end appropriately lets it go. But this one can be super terrible in some cases. Remember those wretched people who tried to claim slaves were happy because they would sing in the plantation fields? Yeah, never assume you know what another person is thinking and never impose your thoughts on them.

Using the suffering of people we know to make a point. Example: you might write a poem about a loved one's death to stake a claim about the unfairness of the world. Well, don't forget that you are writing about a real person. Make sure you do that person justice and don't just use them as a springboard or a symbol. Your loved one is MORE than a symbol. Much more. You might be so caught up in your heightened emotions, you don't even realize. But no one is just a symbol for your poem! Yes, suffering can be included in poems. But should it be romanticized at the cost of another human being?

Positioning yourself as the know-it-all saint, God's mouthpiece. Preacher Poet. "Look at all these people and all the ways they have ruined the world! Let me teach you the truth!" Well, bud, take a look in the mirror. I bet you've hurt someone else. I bet you've contributed to the destruction of the environment. I know you don't want to come off as holier-than-thou in your poems. This can lead to the below issue too.

Ignoring all the bad things to save face. You know that Facebook friend you have you're super jealous of? The one who's always posting flawless pictures of her super-amazing family while you're miserably scrolling along, wondering how anyone can be so happy. Like those white-teethed people on Facebook, perfect, sugary-saccharine poems about good ol' you start to give more cavities than joy. You're not the perfect FB person in real life, so don't be that in poems. Not saying to air all your dirty laundry for the world to see, but a good reader can point out fake-cheer. There's an opposite way to go, too (see below).

Competing in the trauma/oppressed Olympics. "I am the most hurt person alive. Everything that has happened to me is the worst thing ever and no one understands." I don't think I need to elaborate much on this one, but open your mind while writing and remember the plight of others as much as your own. Many people do understand and poetry can be a beautiful way of connecting to other people and sharing our truths. We love to write about our trauma because it helps us work through it in a healthy way, but we shouldn't diminish others' pain to do this.

Assuming you know everything. Spoiler: you don't. No need to keep reading your poem. One of the best parts of poetry is its inquistive nature. Poets and readers can ponder a question together, and what is more intimate, more lovely than that?

All this is to say that poetry requires a kind of self-awareness and empathy some other forms of writing don't. It's personal. It's both private and open. Can you get away with the above if you're an amazing, self-aware poet? Sure. Can you break the rules and write a satirical poem, purposely positioning yourself as a pretenious a-hole? Yeah. But the issue is that a lot of beginning poets are making these mistakes very genuinely and might be a little horrified to realize how their poems come across to some readers. I believe in the goodness of most people deep down.

Anyway, stay mindful, poets.

[P.S. No, I don't know everything either! I think tip and advice articles can start to sound know-it-all themselves. I just compile thoughts and ideas I've gathered and have learned from others along the way that I find useful :) We're all learning, right? I'm just really passionate].

#writeblr poetry #writeblr #writing community #writers on tumblr #writing #writing advice #writing tips #advice for writers #poetry #poetry tips #poetry advice

[save-the-villainous-cat]

I grew up hearing that to be a good artist you have to be willing to steal and it ain't wrong, Disney stole fairy tales, which the Brothers Grimm also stole. Most modern philosophy cribs the notes from older philosophers and don't even get me started on fantasy writers, fucking no good thieves and low lives, the lot of them! Originality is frankly: a myth.

We are all "standing on the shoulders of giants"

Does this mean wholesale copying someone else's work isn't possible?No, no it doesn't. Does it mean that the line between theft and inspiration is thin as fuck? Yes, yes, it does. I prefer not to er on the side of caution even remotely though. Because there's a certain level of conceit in believing your the ONLY person who writes or thinks in a certain way. I've read some peoples writing and thought "fuck do I have a split personality I didn't notice?" then I'll read something else and be like "I could never." But I'd bet you a thousand dollars someone else could.

I have no idea what your intention was, when you were sending this ask. I’m not gonna change my opinion on copyright because some anonymous user on tumblr doesn’t agree with me.

However, I’m not gonna stay quiet when people are starting to lie on here. Especially when they’re disrespecting my culture and the Grimm Brothers, my darlings, who fundamentally influenced the era of Romanticism (aka the best epoch, argue with the wall) and my country.

First of all, your premise solely consists of “to be a good artist, you have to steal.”

I like questioning things, so let’s start with that. Basically, you’re saying that every good artist has stolen something. I think I have to remind you that every artistic epoch in European history has started because someone tried something new. Monet, Van Gogh, Picasso — you can choose.

They were influenced by politics, their personal lives, traumatic experiences etc. And still, they created something new that changed our culture in retrospect.

Monet, the most important forerunner of Impressionism, got criticised for Impressionism, Sunrise by most art critics of the time.

They hated Impressionism. They called the pieces unfinished and no one took them seriously. Because they were new, they were revolutionary. Impressionism is about short, thick brush strokes. Impressionism is about expressing your perception of nature and not about an exact representation of it.

And that was new. That was original. Saying he stole it, is discrediting his work. Monet didn’t suffer most of his life, so you can call his art stolen. Neither did Van Gogh.

Yes, they did get inspired by other artists of the time. But they didn’t copy. They did their own thing. They were original. They changed the culture. They enriched it. That’s why they’re great artists. They were brilliant for the time they were living in.

Now, to the Grimms and Disney. Dearest anon, please do some research before you claim that the brothers stole fairytales. They were Germans. And they collected German fairytales because those were usually transmitted orally. (Also because the era of Romanticism started to dig into the fairytales of the Middle Ages but that’s another story).

The brothers didn’t steal anything. Those fairytales belonged to the public. There were hundreds of versions of those, so the Grimms decided to ask around and write down one version.

And guess what, Disney didn’t steal those fairytales either. Because those fairytales don’t belong to one person. They belonged to the people because they were part of German folklore. Disney built a new version and transformed it into animation. Disney’s Cinderella has very little to do with the fairytale of Aschenputtel (or Aschenbrödel, it depends) I grew up with.

Disney created a version of those fairytales.

Just like when the brothers transformed oral fairytales into literary ones. That doesn’t mean they stole them. Stole them from whom? The German people? How can you steal a story that is part of folklore? Those stories belonged to the people. And the collection of this stories, by the Grimms, did as well.

Now, coming to your philosophy point.

You can divide philosophy into four different categories. They’re called Kant’s four questions and basically structure philosophy.

1. What can I know?

2. What ought I to do?

3. What may I hope for?

4. What is man?

Of course, when you’re a philosopher, your ideas will base on this context. Because generally speaking, those four questions make up philosophy. (Obviously, there are other minor categories.)

So, when you’re a philosopher and argue about ethics, are you copying Kant’s question What ought I to do? No. Because that’s ethics. And you can’t steal the concept of ethics. Kant just found a way to describe it, he didn’t invent it.

How can you steal philosophy, by the way?

Philosophy in itself always tries to answer the same questions. Saying a philosopher is copying someone because they have similar views on the world like someone who came before them is in itself illogical.

Am I stealing Socrates’ beliefs when I say, I want to find eudaimonia for myself? Does that also mean I steal the beliefs of Christianity when I believe in god?

A philosopher is made because they’re having their own beliefs and suggest them to the public. Stealing someone else’s work as a philosopher makes no sense.

Additionally, seriously, what did fantasy writers ever do to you? George R. R. Martin and John R. R. Tolkien are so fundamentally different, I don’t even know what your problem is. Martin got inspired by Tolkien, that’s true.

But Martin also focused on showing the grotesque and political aspects of fantasy. In Tolkien’s work, you’re mostly confronted with good and evil. And brotherhood. Lots of brotherhood. Politics isn’t as important as in A Song of Ice and Fire.

I don’t understand why you have to insult fantasy writers? Fantasy which is one of the most popular genres? What did fantasy writers ever do to you? Why are you so mad?? Of course there are gonna be the same tropes in a certain genre? Of course they’re gonna be dragons in fantasy?? That doesn’t mean they’re copying each other.

You cannot copyright tropes. You cannot copyright an idea. Do you want to copyright dragons?

Also, according to you originality is a myth (Who are you? Mark Twain?). I can only remind you of Van Gogh. Or Mary Shelley. Or William Shakespeare. Or Jane Austen. What did they steal? Words? Paint?

“Standing on the shoulders of giants.” This is true in the sense that we’re standing on something other people have built.

We get inspired, yes. But that doesn’t mean we’re copying. Using the same trope of enemies-to-lovers doesn’t mean you’re copying Jane Austen.

And you can be original while being inspired. Since when does one cancel out the other?

Also, stating “We are all standing on the shoulders of giants.” and immediately following that statement with “Does this mean wholesale copying someone else's work isn't possible?No, no it doesn't.” isn’t logical. You’ve already established that wholesale copying someone else’s work is possible. You’ve already mentioned that the Grimm brothers did that.

So, using this rhetorical question isn’t necessary — this has nothing to do with the discussion, it’s just a poor stylistic choice that bothered me.

I do have to agree with you that the line between inspiration and theft is thin. That doesn’t mean you should simply let it slide when someone is creating something suspiciously close to your work.

I prefer not to er on the side of caution even remotely though. What are you trying to say? You’re not cautious? You’re not interested in someone stealing your work? That’s okay. But then I have to assume that you don’t mind stealing other people’s work either.

And finally, no one said they believe they’re the only person who thinks in a certain way. It’s just suspicious when you write a snippet and a few hours later another user posts the same scene with the same metaphors and the same sentence structure and the same alliterations and the same accumulations. It’s suspicious. That’s it.

At the end, I’ll just mention it again because you don’t seem to have gotten my point. I have no problem with people getting inspired by me. What is making me sad is, that people seem to get inspired without trying something new or finding their own style.

I already mentioned that I’m not trying to harass anyone because they’re getting inspired by me. So, once again. I don’t know what your intention was, when you took your time and sent this to me.

#im sorry to my followers I dunno why we’re having this debate #what was the purpose of this #I will make this about the social network and you won’t stop me #I’m tired of arguing with you #you just have no interesting points :( #long post #no writing

[anonymous-dee]

Me Oversharing About My Favorite Movie

Okay, so I've been meaning to do a full and intense analysis of "In This Corner of the World" for a WHILE now, but it's been hard to put my words and thoughts together in an articulate manner. I'm going to attempt this time! Whoa! OKAY SO, In This Corner of the World is literally my favorite movie of ALL TIME!!! There is so much symbolism and overlying themes on top of the amazing animation, OST, story, and characters.

So let's start with the fact that I literally love Suzu Urano and relate to her on a spiritual level (she's just like me fr fr). The movie covers her life before, during, and after WW2, and the entire movie is a coming of age story about Suzu's life and how her experiences with the war shape her as a person.

First of all, it's important to establish one key theme that is consistent throughout the movie: Suzu's desire to remain innocent and oblivious, and how the movie employs various scenes in order to depict Suzu's journey through her adolescence and early adulthood.

So let's start off with Suzu's childhood. A lot of her childhood moments are embedded with Japanese folklore and art that literally blend into her reality. As the viewer, it's hard to interpret whether or not she was really kidnapped by the beast character at the beginning when she goes into the city to deliver seaweed. This also occurs when the house spirit shows up at her grandmother's house and starts eating the leftover watermelon rinds (though, Lin turned out to be a real character, so I wonder if Lin was a Yokai after all)? Anyways, the next scene that stood out to me in this regard was when Suzu was painting the water and the white rabbits for Mizuhara's assignment.

There is a scene where Mizuhara is walking away and the animation depicts it in the style of Suzu's painting across the entire screen, as if the realities have blended together.

Lastly, there are all the stories that Suzu would tell her younger sister; All of these factors point to the indisputable fact that Suzu had an amazing imagination in her youth. I'm sure you're wondering why that's significant, if you've read this far, and let me tell you why.

Suzu gets married at 18 years old and moves to Kure to live with her new husband and in-laws. She immediately has to take over for her mother-in-law, who suffers from a bad leg. Suzu's childhood abruptly ends at this point in time. She has to take on the full responsibilities of being a homemaker and serving her community. She almost seems to appear sad about having to grow up so quickly, and I think I can assume this based on how she reacted to Shuzaku asking for her hand in marriage (albeit indirectly through her family), and then her apparent lack of enthusiasm towards getting married.

I'd like to take a moment and project some of my own vibes onto my girl Suzu. So, NOT INCLUDING THE WW2 stuff, I've always found her situation low-key relatable, and yet almost desirable. Let me clarify; I totally understand and empathize and feel and relate towards her innermost feelings of wishing to return to the simpler times of her childhood and to regain that same sense of childhood innocence and simplicity.

But... I sort of inevitably want to romanticize the idea of meeting someone as a child, and then like 10 years later they show up and they're like "hey I never forgot about you, I want to ask for your hand in marriage" and then you go live with a nice family on a pretty mountain and do silly little tasks and chores and cook and clean and water the flowers in the garden... HEAR ME OUT. There's something kind of ideal about that lifestyle, and I'll explain more as to why I think that.

I'm white and American, right? So there's this huge concept for a lot of us that is very distinct from a lot of POC cultures (especially Asian and Hispanic, as far as I know), where our families and our culture value independence and self sufficiency. For a lot of people like me, it's "move out when you're 18, get a good job, provide for yourself, etc." I'm not saying that only white people have this experience, but this is also an American value as well. In many Asian and Hispanic cultures, I know that a lot of people live with their families in intergenerational homes. Grandparents, parents, and children will all share the same space and support each other and live together, and as someone who will never get to experience that it definitely makes me wonder what it is like to grow up in an environment like that.

And it also makes me almost desire Suzu's situation because she lives with an entire household of people who are all working together and supporting each other, and while yes Suzu is the main homemaker, she isn't alone and all of Shusaku's family is supporting her.

Anyways, back to your regularly scheduled entertainment...

There's a lot to say about WW2 and I don't have enough space to write about it. One of the things I find REALLY spectacular about this movie is about its domestic portrayal of the war. And how different I think it is in comparison to most other movies in its genre. I think that most movies that focus on Japan and WW2 employ Hiroshima/Nagasaki and/or a military perspective (please correct me if I'm wrong), or at least that's usually the main things we think about when many of us think of Japan and WW2. So by taking a domestic approach and also combining the overarching genre to be a coming of age story, it can really shed light onto what a regular person's life may have been like throughout the war, and how one's everyday life changes from before wartimes (as well as after). Grave of the Fireflies also does this very well.

War changes people (duh). But it's a very interesting concept to see how WW2 affects the people who are not actively fighting in the war, and how their daily life changes. (Am I being redundant? I apologize oof lol).

Not only did growing up affect Suzu's innocence, but the war essentially and eventually smothered it. Throughout the beginning of the war and through Suzu's transition into adulthood, she still tries to grasp a sense of childhood innocence and beauty; she doesn't want to grow up. So while the beginning of the movie had an entire scene based on her painting, there is a scene where canons are shooting out at the planes, and Suzu's mind depicts the blasts as splatters of watercolor on a canvas, turning the treacheries and dangers of war into something innocent and beautiful.

Here is the scene! I found it on Youtube and it's very spicy! Here is what I interpret to be the midway point between fully accepting the reality of her situation and being somewhat emotionally oblivious to it? If that makes sense? Like yes she's aware that she's in the war (obviously) but it's hard to explain what I mean by "oblivious"... I think there is a CLEAR DISTINCTION between "oblivious" and "unaware," and I definitely think she is aware.

The trauma of the war is perhaps putting Suzu in a weird state of denial where the true impacts of the war haven't fully hit her yet, I think.

There was also a part where she goes home to Hiroshima to visit her family, but things obviously aren't the same. Her brother is presumed dead, her sisters and her parents have to go to work and the community center, etc. And I think this part is significant because the first night she was home, she wakes up from a nap and says something along the lines of "I dreamt I married a man and moved to Kure," and I think that's sort of hinting at her subconscious psychology: she is in a weird sort of in denial about how quickly she is growing up. Then, the next day, when everyone leaves the house to go about their day, Suzu is left alone. I think this cements the idea in her head that things just aren't the same anymore.

And on her later trip to Hiroshima, she learns that her parents are dead and she doesn't seem phased by it whatsoever; I think this is a trauma response or some form of denial.

(Sorry for the low quality image! I couldn't find any other pics!)

Okay so these are herons, I think. REGARDLESS of what they are, they are very important symbolically in the movie. While also being in several scenes during Suzu's childhood, there is also one on the front cover of the anime poster. These herons are most prevalent in Suzu's childhood, and I think that they are symbolic OF her childhood and the innocence that comes along with it.

There is one scene later in the movie where Suzu breaks down, and she runs after a heron that somehow made its way over near her house. Despite the fact that there is an air raid going on, she chases the heron away, shouting something to the extent of: "You shouldn't be here! Fly back over the mountain to Hiroshima! You'll be safe there!" And this line in particular, in my opinion, seems to be Suzu projecting her own feelings onto the bird. Since she comes from Hiroshima, she seems to be depicting the place of her childhood as a safe haven and Kure as a place of danger. (Both literally because of the war and symbolically because of her desire to return to her childhood).

And then there is the scene that RIPPED MY HEART OUT.

I literally cry every single time.

But symbolically, Harumi's death and the fact that Suzu loses her right hand are SO IMPORTANT. This is the moment in the movie where Suzu can no longer ignore the weight of the world and escape into her artistic fantasies. The war is REAL. And though it has always been real, I think it's really HITTING her now. And there's a difference between seeing horrible things happen around you and experiencing those things for yourself. It doesn't feel real until it happens to you, and then you finally understand the impact of everything at once. I think so, anyway. For example, many people think "that will never happen to me" until it does, and it changes your entire life.

But the fact that Suzu lost her RIGHT hand is a core representation of the simple fact that she can never draw again. (Unless she learns how to use her left hand but that remains to be seen). Symbolically, she lost the right hand that drew those beautiful escapes, the right hand that held Harumi's within her own, the right hand that copied the pattern of Keiko's kimono (I'm half quoting the video here because it literally spells it out); and the dream-like state that Suzu is in moments before waking up are very sketchy and incomplete, almost like stick figures-- it's the complete opposite of every other visualization of Suzu's art we've seen thus far.

She reminisces on watermelon and mint candy, things from her childhood, as these stick figure-like depictions of her and Harumi appear on screen briefly. I think they are so "poorly" drawn because that sense of innocence is dying.

And then, when Japan loses the war, Suzu is livid. She has a full breakdown over what everyone's sacrifices were for if Japan was destined to lose the war regardless. "There are still five of us standing right here!" She sobs into the ground, completely defeated and at maybe even at her lowest point. She has finally, fully accepted that her daydreaming days of being oblivious are over, and that she can never return to that sense of childlike innocence.

And then, Suzu rebuilds herself, wishing to remain kind. I literally love her so much she's so great. And her and Shusaku adopt a kid and it's so cute EVEN THOUGH the part with the kid and her mom is lowkey terrifying and I was not expecting that level of gore to come out of nowhere but it's fine. Also Shuzaku and Suzu are cute together, say what you will.

Anyways, In This Corner of the World is definitely a comfort movie for me. I don't know if anyone has come this far, or if anyone even cares enough to read this much about a silly little film, but it's SO IMPORTANT TO ME and I think everyone should watch it! Even if all of this was spoilers!!!!!

#in this corner of the world #anime #movie theory #movie analysis #suzu urano #I will defend this movie with my life #symbolism #please watch it #i spoiled the whole thing but it's fine #Youtube

[medicatedandcaffeinated]

A problematic opinion on my own mental health

(TW: mental health, meds, sh)

Just to vent to get it out there: I lowkey miss the rush of a full blown manic episode. Ever since I got medicated my mania has been muted to more of a hypomania type deal.

Am I romanticizing it in my head and remembering only the “good” parts? Absolutely.

Does this make me want to stop taking my medication to let my freak fly? Absolutely not.

I miss the burst of energy. Not just the burst of energy, the burst of creative energy. Of constructive energy. I once painted 7 painting at once and they were some of my best work (like I’d go down a line and by the time I finished details on painting number 7, painting number 1 would be dry enough for me to add to it again). I once made a whole scavenger hunt with all the props and larp gear within 2-3 months. That sounds like a lot of time but you gotta understand how big that project was. I used to get the sudden inspiration to remodel my whole room, to clean the whole house. I once moved a whole couch upstairs by myself (did I get it stuck….yes…I’ll add a photo). I once ripped up all the downstairs carpet in one night. I ripped up the carpet in my room, and sanded and stained and polyurethane coated it all by myself. Combine it with my adhd’s hyper fixation: I learned how to embroider, to crochet, to knit, to sculpt with various materials, and how to use different mediums of paint.

But I don’t miss the hysterics. I don’t miss the inability to sit down or stay still. I don’t miss the inability to sleep or eat or tear myself away from my hyper fixations. I don’t miss how reckless I was or my tendency to hurt myself as a way to calm or self sooth. I don’t miss compulsively scratching my skin until it bled or any of the other stuff I did. I don’t miss the way my mania mixed with my paranoia or my self destruction. I don’t miss needing to cover the mirrors during manic episodes or going into debt on things I’m convinced I need to buy. I don’t miss running around the house with a weapon because I’ve convinced myself there are people in the house coming to get me. I don’t miss the drastic ups and down of my mood especially toward my loved ones.

It’s problematic for me to miss my mania because I know how much it hurt me. I can’t help but crave the energy I was able to have during it. Especially since most my medications now are mild sedatives which makes it hard for me to do as much as I used to. I don’t paint anymore. I don’t sculpt. I write tho, which is something I could never sit down and do before.

I relied on it so heavily to propel me through life that I didn’t really think about what would happen if it wasn’t there anymore. I never dreamed of having stability or any type of foundation. But I have that now and I have to completely relearn how to walk. My mental health and the amount I suffered was ignored by my family and the people around me for the majority of my upbringing. My adhd wasn’t medicated until I was 20 and the rest (including the mania, paranoia, etc) wasn’t medicated until I was 22 and I’m still adjusting to it. I let the adrenaline of a manic high and the lull of cannabis keep alive for my formative years and now that my mania is medicated and I’m sober (for a year since April 2nd). I don’t have either of those anymore but I’m confident I’ll figure it out. It’ll just take some time and some trial and error.

(The couch I tried to move upstairs by myself)

And a mania painting. It’s the only picture of one of my painting I have because I’d finish them and instantly give them away. I also only painted for like a couple years so there was no skill or dedication

#mental health #mania #problematic #journal #tw mention of mental illness #medication #toxic traits #candid

[apricusapollo]

Hello Crys,

I'm just curious what are your favourite Regulus headcannons ? I would love to hear your thoughts about his favourite paintings, music, art styles too :)

hello!!

help i actually have a whole ass google document with my random regulus headcanons and almost half of them might or might not be a pure projection BUT i didn't talk much about those things in that doc soo *cracks fingers* alright so (this is all going to be projection as well!)

before i get into the movements and styles and all of that stuff, i want to say and this might be Very unpopular opinion, but i don't think he'd annotate books. HEAR ME OUT. i think he would underline his favourite scenes and quotes and tab the books but Writing little comments in them? he would never. when i was a kid, my dad was very against me and my sister writing Anything in the books we owned and it got stuck with me and i still hate writing anything in them and, i'm not comparing my dad and orion lmao Never but, for that exact reason, i think regulus would refuse to write a single word in the book, he'd only underline with a pencil and ruler and use index tab, that's it.

Phew now that's out of the way!! i think his favourite art movement would be romanticism (he'd love realism too, but romanticism more) because i think he would feel very connected to romantic writers. the melancholy, the sadness, the love for the nature and finding peace in being alone in the nature, internal fight and desire for freedom, the idealization of past; sadness and hatred for destroyed present and hope for future, the purity of childhood, the importance of individuality - if all of this doesn't scream regulus, then i do not know what does.

i think i said it in the doc as well but i like to type on my computer so i'll say again that i think his favourite book from romantic era would be Frankenstein by Mary Shelley because- Well first of all it's Mary fucking Shelley, COME ON. second, i think, despite how horribly sad this sounds, he would feel relation to Frankenstein's monster, if we judge from the small things we know about him from canon. it'd be hard for him to get into it at first because (just like me) he'd absolutely hate books that are written in first person, but then he'd get Quite Into It and even end up crying because of the ending. now, no one asked for this, but i'm also going to show some quotes i think he would love and relate to:

“I was benevolent and good; misery made me a fiend. Make me happy, and I shall again be virtuous.”

“I am alone and miserable. Only someone as ugly as I am could love me.”

“I am malicious because I am miserable”

"The good soul did everything, but in vain. Fate is too powerful, and its inescapable laws were leading me to a horrible death."

"When the flow of time confirms our loss, that's when true grief begins."

"I often wanted to dive into a still lake and hide in its water forever with my own sorrow."

"I see happiness everywhere and only I didn't get it."

"I am alone, all alone! I bring you, my own creator, nothing but disdain. What am I supposed to expect from other people who owe me nothing?"

"Is it not reasonable that I should hate those who hate me? I will not negotiate with enemies. Since I am unhappy, let them also suffer!"

"I wanted to comfort him, but how can you promise the happiness of life to a person who is extremely unhappy and has lost all hope in this life?" (this has very james to regulus energy)

"You hate me, but your hate is nothing compared to what I feel for myself."

ALRIGHT MOVING ONTO THE ART!!!

this is kinda hard because i think he would find beauty in Everything? kind of? like,,, i'm not a big fan of cubism and pop art and surrealism Simply Because I prefer baroque, romanticism, impressionism etc etc However, i can still appreciate it because it was created by someone, someone took their time and put their energy and thought in whatever they were creating and I think that's beautiful. creating something from Nothing but simply an idea in your head, that's quite inspiring. so, i think he'd be like that too.

he'd know to appreciate things even while being critical, he'd know to find beauty in everything he looked at. it's like that one quote in to the lighthouse which i don't remember 100% but it was something like "if you look at person for a long time, you will find at least one thing about them that will interest you." i think he'd be like that about art, he'd find something he liked in Everything.

i think he would Adore pre-raphaelite brotherhood and along artists like Rembrandt and Caravaggio and Michelangelo, he'd absolutely love J.M.W Turner, Gustave Dore, John Martin- oh he would LOVE john martin (he is literally the love of my entire life)

before I get to the list of some of the paintings i think would be his favourite (because they're my favourite), i have to say that he would go absolutely feral (internally) over religious themes in arts. he would just Lose His Mind.

he would also lose his mind over storm on the sea of galilee by Rembrandt because a) it's Breathtaking, b) it's Rembrandt's only seascape, c) it's been lose for over 30 years

he would also love the story of the procuress by cranach and I will not get into heavy detail about that painting right now, maybe in the future because it's so, so insane.

NOW THE LIST:

liberty leading the people by eugèn delacroix

the kiss by fracesco hayez

hannibal and his army crossing the alps / fishermen at the sea / the angel standing in the sun by turner

the painter's studio / the desperate man by gustave courbet

fallen angel by alexandre cabanel

the lament for icarus by herbert james draper

the enigma by gustave dore (along with dore's illustrations of paradise lost by john milton!!! they're so so goddamn good, that man was Insane)

pandemonium / the great day of his wrath / the last judgment by john martin (like dore, martin's illustrations of paradise lost are also amazing so i think he'd love them too!)

(obviously, he'd have lot lot more (because I do) but i'm not gonna name all of them now, those are just the ones that floated up my brain the moment i thought of Favorite Paintings)

the music- the music is kind of complicated i think because,,, Look, personally, i think he'd listen to whatever ykwim? he wouldn't just choose One Specific Genre. no, he would listen to whatever he was on the mood to listen to and to whatever popped up in his head first in the morning. his music taste started from tchaikovsky, went all the way through musicals soundtracks and ended with taylor swift and one direction. i think his music taste is Very Diverse. BUT!! classical music has a very special place in his heart and (projecting again) he can not read without classical music playing on the background. if it's Modern songs with lyrics, he will pay attention to the lyrics and still will not be able to read, but if it's too quiet, he will get distracted by his own thoughts so No, he has to have classical music on!

i think this is it? kind of ? i could still go on but i'm pretty sure my laptop will overload if i continue typing (it's very old computer, alright??) and i think i rambled more than enough!! but YEAH jesus this was FUN i love him so much, he's so so dear to me!!

thanks for leaving such fun ask, anon, i'm smooching your forehead right now!!

#crys answers asks #regulus black #marauders headcanon #arts #because I mainly focused on arts #and regulus' love for arts #honestly i need to sit down with (ahb) reg and talk about arts!! #all of this was just pure projection #he is so dear to me he's my little guy ykwim #it's 1:25 am and i'm crying over Fictional Character #this is why my parents are disappointed in me #but anyways!! #i could get more into regulus and his love for romanticism #maybe in the future!

[shelfperson]

hmmmmnngggh something something 'take your sword run me throw' as an act of trust and impeccable homoeroticism vis a vis ed and izzy shooting each other and ed cutting off izzy's toes like hmmmmmmMMMM there is something there.

like i'm working this out as i'm typing it but like. stede stabbing ed is totally a sex thing, stede getting stabbed by other people including izzy is not, ed making izzy eat his own toes is ALSO a sex thing but like in a one-sided and bad way, izzy cutting stede's shirt and getting his cheek poked is ALSO probably a one-sided sex thing when i think on it, and the shooting-off-of-apendages in not a sex thing for anyone HMMMMMMMMMMM okay okay okay i think i have it so like-

like edward is initiating intimacy with stede with the language of violence and double-speak, but like in a fun sexy shy way and stede totally rolls with it but also flips it on it's head because. it's not about the inherent eroticism of being pierced by another man it's about the TRUST it's about the fact that stede would never actually hurt ed it's about how only with each other can the boring and debilitating constant violence of piracy be exiting and intimate.

BUT IZZY. IZZY JUST LIVES IN VIOLENT PENETRATION METAPHOR PIRATE HAYES-CODE LAND he THRIVES THERE (not accidentally but like. he thinks he does). Anyway like. He wants to do this intimate violence homoerotic trust fall shit SO BAD he wants to to it so so so so bad he wants to never have to talk about his feelings and just eat his own toes and have that mean i love you, i trust you etc. even when like. for edward it does NOT mean that it means "stop threatening me with my life or i kill you, i do NOT trust you At All"

and like. he's eating his own toes. he's just getting more of himself, edward never feeds izzy one of his own toes or anything because izzy is delusional about the nature of their relationship and edward does not want to be with him. he's just spreading around toxicity and it's coming right back to him, and he thinks he wants it.

this is getting unintelligible but THE POINT IS the POINT. IS. when ed blows izzy's leg off it's a punishment for izzy ever thinking he knew anything about edward. for saying that is was his feelings for stede that were destroying him, not the grind of piracy, as well as for trying to be real with him so LATE in the game. (there actually a really good meta that goes into all this in a LOT more detail it's great)

but when IZZY shoots edward i think he's still in a romanticized mindset about their relationship, even as he's also confirming to himself that he's more capable or hurting edward than he thought and this is all kinda a little bit on him as well as ed (the linked post goes more into this as well.) and by romanticized i mean that izzy really heaps on a heretofore unseen amount of personal responsibility for ed's spiral. like the whole "we did this to him" "he was a mad dog and we put him down" spiel plays out to me like he's still rationalizing ed's presumed death and the fact that edward was not in love with him by making a narrative in his head of like. a fitting and beautiful conclusion to a lifetime of destruction.

SO. LIKE. anytime edward does something violent to izzy it is explicitly to put distance between them but anytime izzy is violent with ed (psychically or verbally) in his fucked up little mind he's bringing them closer together. and this is an inherently self-eating system, where everything izzy throws at edward to make them closer just has edward retaliating bigger and harder in self defence. and izzy was all about that until it escalated so much his leg got shot off and the people who were now his crew were suffering too.

#i don't even know if this makes any sense and i'll probably come back to this to fix the surely numerous typos #i just had to get this one out because the whole thing FASCINATES ME #like i am on my edizzy koolaid rn but do not misunderstand me i am an ed apologist FIRST an ed understander SECOND and then and only then #do i start unpacking izzy #but when i do i am the only person in the universe who understands that wet dog mkay that old man is mine #our flag means death #ofmd #ofmd season 2 #ofmd spoilers #ofmd meta #meta #ed teach #edward teach #blackbeard #izzy hands #edizzy #blackbonnet #izzy hands meta