#steve doesn’t know he’s going through a life crisis

[eddiesghxst]

steddie x sensitive!reader where eddie’s ur best friend that you do ‘more than best friend’ things with and steve was the asshole at school that would tease you and always make you cry.

eddie knew about it but he didn’t know your bully was steve so when eddie and steve start working together and you stop by one day eddie doesn’t think much of it when u see steve and ur really jumpy and look like ur ready to bolt out of there because you’re often shy around strangers.

and steve doesn’t even fucking remember you and so when you leave steve is like “is she always that jumpy?? like was i being weird or??” and eddie just shakes his head and is like “nah she just has a hard time w strangers. some asshole used to tease the shit out of her in high school. she never told me who it was but the day i find out i swear i’ll hunt them down and strangle them myself.” and steve is like wow what kind of an asshole would do that to a girl like you??

because steve thinks you’re pretty and sweet and he likes you and he thinks he wants to ask you out but how will he do that when he: 1 - can’t seem to have a conversation with you and not scare you off 2 - is convinced you and eddie are definitely dating even if eddie says it’s not like that and 3 - can’t decide who he’s more jealous of when he sees how close you two are

because is that even normal? is it normal to like two people at the same time? is it normal to feel left out when you and eddie are snuggled together during movie night? is it normal to want to hold both of your hands, kiss both you, touch both of you??? iS iT ?!!?!

#okay brb i have an assignment due in 20 mins #but #steve doesn’t know he’s going through a life crisis #steve falling to his knees when he realizes it was him that bullied you #eddie hating steve for it but being so heartbroken bc of how close they’ve become #steve begging for forgiveness #eddie teaching steve how to treat you the way you should be treated #steve having to learn to be patient to mend the damage he did #steve having to earn both you and eddie’s trust but also eddie trying to show u that steve isn’t like he was before #i have thots i have thots i have thots #i can go on and on guys fr #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #eddie x reader #steve harrington x you #eddie munson fanfic #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington fic #steve harrington x reader #eddie munson x steve harrington #steddie x reader #steddie #rachie speaks #wips

[flowerfan2]

Steve falls hard, is the thing.  At least, he does this time.  He knows it’s crazy, that Eddie has only been out of the hospital for a few weeks, that Steve has only really known him for a few days more than that. But he knows more than most people that life is full of cliffs and dangers and if there’s happiness to be had, he’s ready to take it.

It happens so quickly that he speeds right past any potential sexuality crisis, doesn’t pass go, just realizes one evening while he’s tucking a blanket around Eddie’s feet when he dozes off on the couch that he’s in love.   He knows it’s real, because Eddie’s feet are frankly stinky since it’s still hard for him to get around, and yet Steve’s content to curl up with Eddie’s feet in his lap and make sure they stay toasty warm.

He tells Robin that night, and once she’s finished swatting him with a nearby magazine and then hugging him until his ribs squeak, she asks him what he’s going to do about it.  “Tell him,” Steve answers, and Robin stares at him as if he’s grown two heads (he hasn’t, he checked).  “Just like that?” she asks, eyes wide.

“Know any good reason to wait?” Steve asks, and when Robin shakes her head no, he smiles.

The next day Steve puts on a clean pair of khakis and his favorite striped polo.  He ever so briefly considers wearing something not so preppy, but he doesn’t think Eddie would appreciate anything less than the truth.  The real Steve, polo shirts and all.  Begin as you mean to continue, and all that.

When he arrives at the trailer the next day (yes, that same goddamned trailer, flimsy and broken but in somewhat better shape than it was a few weeks ago), Steve takes a deep breath and knocks on the door, then remembers he’s supposed to use his key so that Eddie doesn’t have to get up off the couch too often.  He juggles the grocery bag in his arms and finds the key, glad to see when he gets the door open that Eddie hasn’t been disturbed.  In fact, it looks like he’s fast asleep.

Steve puts the groceries away and settles at the end of the couch like he always does, pulling Eddie’s feet onto his lap, and paging through a comic book.  A little while later Eddie stirs, blinking his eyes open and smiling at Steve.

They decide to watch a movie, but after a few minutes Eddie complains that his neck hurts from lying in the same position all day.  Steve helps him switch around so that his head is at the other end of the couch, and Eddie continues to gripe, but he’s smiling the whole time.  Steve can tell he likes the attention, likes when Steve slides an arm around his back and gently rearranges his limbs.  Steve likes it too.

Steve fetches some snacks from the kitchen and returns to find Eddie shuffling himself around again, claiming that the new position isn’t working either.  Soon they’re sitting next to each other, legs stretched out on a pillow on the coffee table, the television directly in front of them.  Steve is getting a suspicious feeling about the whole thing, and it only intensifies when Eddie gives a little sigh and rests his head on Steve’s shoulder.  “Thanks,” Eddie says softly.  “This is perfect.”

Steve’s not sure how much time goes by – time is weird when you’re practically holding your breath – but when he tilts his head to look at Eddie, Eddie’s looking right at him.  

“Eds?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m falling for you, you know.”

Eddie bites his lip and smiles, his nose crinkling adorably.  “Yeah, I figured.”  He turns back to the television and snuggles in closer against Steve’s side.  “It’s good, ‘cause, you know.  Me too.”

______

You can read all of my Steddie ficlets in one place on A03 here.

#Stranger Things #Stranger things fic #Steve Harrington #Steddie #Eddie Munson #Steddie fic #Steddie ficlet

[rebelspykatie]

Part 1 of 2 🧦🧵

Part 2 | AO3

It’s the socks that break his resolve. Of course it’s the socks.

The first time he saw them, he wasn’t even sure what he was feeling. Steve Harrington waltzing into gym class in those knee high white socks wasn’t what Eddie expected to solidify his sexuality during the crisis phase of sophomore year, but he knew what he felt in that moment would change him forever. The way he couldn’t take his eyes off them. How he finally understood the whispers he heard from girls in the hallways. That fluttering in his stomach when Steve ran past his spot on the bleachers. 

There was no going back after that. Sophomore year was just the awakening. Over the years it turned into an obsession, the way he made sure he was in the building whenever Steve might be wearing them at gym class or during a game. He was disappointed when he showed up and Steve was sporting ankle socks, grumbling about it the whole way home, but staying to watch either way. 

It didn’t escape his notice that Steve looked hot in anything. Those small green shorts left little to the imagination. But there was something about the socks that did it for him. The way they stood out, perfect white against his tan skin. How they hugged his calves and the material strained to fit over muscles. The colored rings around the top bleed dull from the stretch of the fabric. The direct connection they had to his burgeoning sexuality emerging during that fateful gym class. 

Maybe it was the peak of leg hair inching out over the tops. A rare sight in the fall when he’s shaved hairless for swim season. Eddie gets a different thrill during that time of the year, hiding under the bleachers to watch Steve in his tiny speedo. But no, basketball season was more his speed. Pretending he’s there to sell while camping out to catch a glimpse of Steve in small shorts and knee highs. 

By senior year, he knows Steve hangs out at the Forest Hills park with some of the other guys from the basketball team. And this time he wasn’t even seeking him out, he just happened to be passing by after school on his way home and honed in on Steve’s car in the parking lot. If he camps out in that park to sell that summer, hoping to catch a glimpse of Steve, it’s no one’s business but his own. 

When Starcourt happens, it makes Eddie’s life easier. He doesn’t have to sneak around in a mall, he can blend in and fade into the crowd without anyone knowing his true reason for showing up in that overcrowded nightmare fuel of a place. He can sip on his orange Julius and watch as Steve flirts with everyone that comes into Scoops. He waits patiently for Steve to take his turn cleaning, bent over the tables with his back to the entrance, calves pulled taunt as he bends to pick up garbage from around booths. The socks aren’t quite as high as the Hawkins gym issued ones, but they’re still putting on a good show. 

He’s pretty sure Steve never caught wind of his presence, how he’s creeped on him for years harboring an idiotic crush. Borderline stalking. There’s no recognition on his face when Eddie holds a bottle to his throat while he’s running for his life. After surviving, they become friends and somehow that’s worse than being a nobody to Steve. 

Suddenly, he’s up close and personal with everything he’s been watching from afar. He doesn’t get to see his beloved socks for a long time, but it doesn’t mean that Steve isn’t torturing him. There are pool parties where he suffers through another round of tight shorts, this time dripping wet and clinging to areas Eddie desperately wants to see. There are movie nights in the dead of summer, Steve shirtless and hairier than ever, lounging across the couch and inches away from Eddie’s twitchy hands. There are sleepovers where Eddie gets to witness a sleep ruffled Steve blearily searching for coffee with his hair standing at a truly incredible height off his head. 

All of it was just a dumb crush, something he tried to hide away. There’s no way Steve feels the same. He resigns himself to exposure therapy, hoping with enough time it’ll go away. As if he hasn’t spent five years watching from afar as Steve grows into a man and becomes the kind of person Eddie wants to bring home at night. 

So of course, because the universe is a cruel bitch that never lets Eddie off easy, it’s the socks that break his resolve. They’re going to the county fair, all the teens, and Steve shows up in tiny little blue shorts with dumb knee high socks. Eddie’s brain is completely fried by the time he’s even out of his van. They’re the same stark white he remembers, with three blue rings around the top, stretched to their limits, just like Eddie’s restraint. He’s even wearing a gray Hawkins high basketball shirt, like he’s aware that he’s stepping right into Eddie’s dirty little fantasy. 

It’s slow torture, following him around the fair, acting like he’s not effected every time he catches a glimpse of Steve. Redirecting his line of sight every time Steve turns around and avoiding Robin’s knowing gaze. The inside of his cheek is sore from biting it to stop himself from opening his big, dumb mouth. 

He’s so, so well behaved until they get home. Everyone else heading out and leaving him and Steve alone. All it takes is Steve reaching for a glass in the kitchen, on tiptoes, his own private show, socks moving with the flex of his calves, for his restraint to snap. He lets out a moan before he even knows it’s happening, freezing in the dead silence, his own stupidity echoing in his head. When Steve turns around and looks at him with that adorable surprised puppy look, he’s a goner, crossing the room and spinning Steve around to trap him against the counter, glass clutched in his hand. 

“You and these damn socks, Harrington.”

Steve sets the glass down, but doesn’t push Eddie away. In fact, he pulls Eddie closer, wrapping a hand around his neck, “I thought you’d never get the hint.” And kisses him.

Part 2 | AO3

#steve harrington #stranger things #eddie munson #steddie #katie writes

[oh-stars]

United Front

Love is Co-Parenting

a @steddielovemonth prompt | 1074 words | CW: N/A | Rating: T

--

Steve is on the steps when Eddie pulls up. He knows what he looks like, sitting on the bottom step, covered in flour and paint with a cigarette between his fingers. They don’t smoke anymore, not like they used to at least. At most, they’ll sneak a cigarette here and there on particularly stressful days and maybe they’ll have one socially, but they don’t go through the packs they used to. 

Eddie’s frozen in the driver’s seat of his van, leaning forward to rest his chin and hands on the steering wheel. Steve can’t hear his thoughts for obvious reasons, but it’s clear as day that Eddie’s trying to weigh the costs of coming inside at all. It’s futile because Steve knows that an asteroid could crash into their home and bring on the end of time and Eddie would still come home to them. 

The caution, however, is still noted and not without envy. 

He takes a slow drag as Eddie finally crawls out of the van and walks up the path. “You didn’t call so I’m safe in assuming this isn’t a major crisis of the upside down variety?” 

“Nope,” Steve says, blowing the smoke out of the corner of his mouth. 

“And everyone is safe, sound, and healthy?” Eddie leans against the column lining the pathway. 

“Yup.” Another deep drag, then Steve, the gracious partner that he is, hands over the cigarette to Eddie. 

Eddie takes it, shoulders easing as his cheeks hollow. “Well?” He blows a ring of smoke toward the awning. 

Steve reaches for the cigarette again and flicks off the ashes. It smolders in between his fingers, but he doesn’t bring it to his lips. “Henderson’s nephew–” 

“You mean our son?” Eddie asks, eyebrow raised. “The boy we’re raising? The light of our life? Is that who you’re talking about?” 

“Oh yes,” Steve says, exasperated. “Dustin’s corrupted our son. Therefore, right now, he’s Dustin’s Nephew.” 

Eddie crosses his arms, a furrow in his brow. “Stevie–” His jaw clicks as he snaps it shut, a flush to his face. Steve’s glare must be more intense than he realizes. “Baby,” he tries again, softer as he kneels in front of Steve. “Are you actually mad or just tired?” 

“Frustrated,” Steve corrects, “not mad.” 

“Right, of course,” Eddie says.

Steve takes another drag, then offers it to Eddie. “I love him with everything in me, but he is never allowed to spend that much time with Dustin one-on-one again.” 

Eddie blinks hard. “What the hell did he do?” 

He motions to the flour and paint covering his shirt and body. “I left him alone for ten minutes to deal with the laundry and he made a goddamn volcano in our living room. Our living room, Eds.” 

“A volcano?”

Steve huffs and runs a hand through his hair, motioning with the hand holding the cigarette. “One of those paper fuckers that they make for science fairs. He made a giant ass one in our living room.” 

Eddie winces as his hands fall to Steve’s knees. “How bad is it?” 

“Not demodog in the fridge gross, but worse than the kool-aid water balloons the kids had for their graduation,” Steve drones. 

“And what did you do with our boy?” 

Steve puts out the cigarette and leans forward to rest his head on Eddie’s shoulder, barely resisting the urge to hide in Eddie’s neck all together. “He’s sitting in time out at the kitchen table.” 

Eddie sighs and rubs Steve’s back. A kiss to Steve’s pulse point takes away some of the tension in his body, but not all. He still has to go back inside and console Jamie, scrub the vinegar and soap from the couches, carpet, and all the walls, and then go on about his day like they didn’t nearly destroy the house. 

“Think he’s upset?” 

“Oh, absolutely,” Steve says as he pulls away with another sigh. He stands up and pulls Eddie with him. “He wasn’t crying when I came out here, but I think he was close.” Steve pauses, swallows hard against the lump in his throat. “Was that shitty? To just leave him there?” 

Eddie shakes his head. “No, baby, it wouldn’t have done either of you any good to stay in there while you were mad. He’s not a baby anymore–” 

“Are you saying that to make me feel better?” Steve asks, hand on the doorknob. “Because that isn’t helping.” 

“Does it help knowing I’ve got your back with this? Whatever you think is fair, I’m with you,” Eddie says. 

Steve nods. “A united front.” 

“Best there is.” 

“Is he old enough to learn how to clean the carpets?” Steve asks as he pushes open the door. 

Eddie’s gasp as he sees the carnage of their living room validates all of Steve’s anger in a single breath. “Yeah,” he squeaks. “And if he wasn’t before, he sure as hell is now.” 

Steve doesn’t even look at it, heads straight for the dining table where Jamie is sitting in his chair with his head on the table as little sniffles echo from the hollow of his arms. His heart breaks at the sight, any remaining anger dissipating between the hand on the small of his back from Eddie stepping in close and the pure remorse from his baby. 

“Jamie,” Eddie says calmly. 

Jamie’s head pops up, revealing his big, brown eyes wide with tears pooling at his lashes, tear tracks and snot all along his blotchy face. “I’m sorry,” he cries, big sobs rushing through his body. He hops off his chair and stumbles toward Steve and Eddie. 

Steve picks him up and kisses the side of his head. “You could have gotten really hurt, buddy,” Steve tells him. “That’s why I was so mad.” 

“And if you had told Dad you wanted to make a volcano,” Eddie says as he wraps his arms around the both of them, “you guys could have made an even bigger one outside.” 

Jamie picks up his head and swipes his hand under his nose. “Really?” 

Steve thumbs away his tears and uses his own shirt to wipe away the snot. “Maybe not today, but yes, we could have eventually.”

There’s a bigger conversation to be had and a living room to clean, but it doesn't seem as intimidating as it was when Steve went to sit on the porch. Not with Eddie standing with him and their son safe and sound. 

---

Thank you @lady-lostmind

Ao3 Link

#ohstars fic #steddie #steddie fic #steve harrington #stranger things #eddie munson #steddie big bang #steddielovemonth #ohstars posting challenge #this is set in the same universe as the man that i could be #in case you were wondering #but its also a stand alone #its up to you

[wintersoldiersoul]

Afterglow

A/N: Final part to the Tolerate it mini series!! Thank you all for the support on this series, I've had so much fun writing it and I hope you enjoy!

 It had been 5 days. 5 days since you were shot. 5 days since Bucky had seen your eyes, had heard your voice, and 5 days since he had gotten more than an hour of sleep at a time. He stayed next to you in your bed at the medbay where you lay unconscious. You had pulled through, for now at least. Bruce had performed emergency surgery on the jet on the way home to stabilize you until he and Helen could get you into an actual operating room.

You flatlined on the table. The rhythmic beeping of the monitor turned into one long tone as your life was whisked away. Steve had to hold Bucky back from breaking down the door of the O.R. as the horrible sound flowed to the other room. It took them 3 minutes to resuscitate you. The worst 3 minutes of Bucky’s entire life. Worse than any moment he had spent with HYDRA. But you fought. You pulled through the surgery. Now, you just had to wake up.

Bucky hadn’t left your side. Steve brought him food, knowing he wouldn’t take the time to go make himself something. After the third day, Helen brought him a bed to sleep in. Not that he was even sleeping anyway.

“How’s she doing?” Steve asked, walking in.

Bucky sighed and rubbed his eyes. “No change. She’s still stable but-” his voice broke. “What if she doesn’t wake up, Steve?” He looked into the eyes of his best friend.

Steve placed a supportive hand on his shoulder. “She’s gonna wake up. Your girl’s a fighter.”

“I don’t even know if she’s still my girl,” Bucky whispered. “God, I wasted so much time! I fucked everything up. This is my fault.”

“It’s not your fault that she got hurt,” Steve responded.

“Yes it is! If we had still been together, maybe I could have convinced her to stay back on this mission. It was too dangerous.” 

Your eyes slowly started to open as he spoke but he didn’t notice since his head was in his hands.

“I could have stopped her. I could have protected her better,” he continued.

“Too…stubborn. Couldn’t have…stopped me,” you croaked. Your voice was raspy from 5 days of silence.

At the sound of your voice, Bucky immediately picked his head up. “Oh my god,” he grabbed your hand and kneeled at the side of your bed, stroking your hair. “Oh my god, Y/N,” fresh tears spilled down his cheeks.

“Bucky,” you whispered. “You look like shit.”

He laughed through his tears. So typical of you, of the girl he loved. Always sassy, even in crisis. He kissed your hand over and over again, still not believing that this was real and not a dream. 

The next day, you were released from the medbay but instructed to stay on bedrest for at least a week. You were just happy to be in the comfort of an actual bed. 

Bucky waited on you hand and foot as soon as you were brought back up to your room. “What do you need?” He asked, hands on his hips. He was ready to spring into action.

“Water, please. And maybe something to eat. Something small.”

He nodded and immediately left the room, returning a few minutes later with a glass of water and a grilled cheese. “Here,” he said, setting the glass on the table and handing you the plate. “I made you a grilled cheese. I know it's your comfort food.”

“Thank you, Bucky,” you answered. An awkward silence fell over the two of you. Technically, the two of you weren’t back together. Your confessions of love as you were dying didn’t automatically mean that he was your boyfriend again.

“Y/N,” he finally said. “I was so scared when you were shot. You were bleeding out in my arms and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I thought I was gonna lose you for good. Do you remember what I said to you?”

You smiled softly. “That we were gonna get married and adopt a bunch of cats?” 

He nodded. “Yes. I meant every word I said. I want a life with you, beautiful. I want to get married in the Fall like you’ve always talked about and I want to get us a nice house and fill it with kids and animals and grow old with you. I wanna give you everything.”

You sat, looking at him. Nothing he said would ever erase the hurt he put you through. But despite yourself, you still loved him more than anything. You wanted that life with him. “Okay.”

“Okay?” He echoed. “Really? You’ll let me be yours again?” His eyes lit up.

“Yes, Bucky,” you smiled. “But you can never pull that shit again, do you understand me? I don’t need you to protect me from yourself. I’m a big girl. I’ll never need to be protected from you, I just need to love you. Fucked up past and all.” 

“Oh, angel,” he looked at you lovingly. “I know I’m never gonna be able to take back what I did. But I can spend the rest of our lives showering you with love and showing how much you mean to me. I promise I will never do that again. But you need to promise me something, too.” He took a deep breath. “Never almost die again, okay? I was so fucking scared.”

You blinked back tears at the pure emotion and love for him that you felt. “I promise.” 

The whole time you were healing, Bucky didn’t leave you alone. He got you whatever you needed, even buying a little bell for you to ring. He knew he’d regret that immediately but he wanted to make this misery a little bit better for you. You were obsessive with it, abusing the power he had given you.

“Bucky!” you would call, ringing the bell. 

He would sprint into your bedroom, flour on his face from the cookies he was baking for you. “Yes, honey?”

“Kiss me.” And he would. 

A few weeks later, you were able to leave the house for a couple hours at a time. You were in the passengers seat of the car with Bucky behind the wheel, driving you to an undisclosed location.

“Are you kidnapping me, Bucky Barnes?” You asked when he refused to give up the location you were headed.

“Patience, baby,” he smirked, keeping his eyes on the road.

20 minutes later, you pulled up to a large farmhouse. The outside was white and it had vines growing up the sides. It was the kind of place you had always dreamed of living.

“Bucky this house is beautiful but what are we doing here?” You laughed. 

“You like it?”

“It’s my dream house. I’ve always wanted to live in a place like this.”

He looked deep into your eyes. “I’m so glad, honey. Cause it’s ours.”

You blinked at him, not sure if you heard his words correctly. “Wait, what?”

“This is our home, beautiful. I bought it for us.” 

You were speechless. The house in front of you was the kind of place you had wanted to live in since you were a child. “Come on, I’ll give you a tour.” 

After he walked you around the interior, he led you out to the backyard. It was stunning. String lights hung from wooden beams, there was a fire pit and a wood fired pizza oven, and flowers perfectly landscaping the grass. Your eyes gazed over everything, not noticing Bucky shifting his position beside you.

You gasped as your eyes found their way back to him, kneeling on one knee.

“Y/n,” he began. “My beautiful angel. The love of my life. My reason for living. We’ve been through so much together. My past isn’t perfect. I’m far from perfect. I’ve done a lot of horrible things. But somewhere in my life, I must have done something good. Because I met you. And by some karmic intervention, you let me love you.” Tears overflowed from your eyes as he spoke. “Baby, will you marry me?”

You nodded your head enthusiastically. “Yes, of course, yes,” you cried. He slipped a ring onto your finger. “When did you even get this? You’ve been glued to my side since the mission.”

He smiled and kissed you passionately. “You wanna know something, baby? Remember when you heard Steve say that I had been looking at rings? Well, I wasn’t just looking,” he beamed. “I’ve been carrying this around in my pocket every day for months now. Just incase the opportunity ever presented itself.”

“Oh, Buck,” you gasped, hugging him tightly into you. “I love you, Bucky Barnes. My fiancé.”

“Ooh I like how that sounds,” he laughed. “I love you too. Forever.”

Taglist: @differenttyphoonwerewolf @jamesbuckybarnes1917 @learisa @mollygetssherlockcoffee @almosttoopizza @kandis-mom

@spookyparadisesheep @vicmc624 @aesthetic0cherryblossom @kjah97 @elizalexwil @scmoobly @wayward-gypsy @sarah1barnes

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[morganbritton132]

following the visit at the neurologists office, how does the internet and the party react? Does Steve know someone posted about his breakdown?

Steve is actually the first to know about the video.

He doesn’t go to work the day after his breakdown. He’s physically and mentally exhausted, and neither Robin nor Eddie (nor Dustin, nor Ozzy) would allow him when his emotions are that compromised, but he goes the day after that.

Steve doesn’t even get through attendance in his first period before students are asking him if he’s going to die. He asks what they’re talking about and they mention the appointment. Steve thinks for one heartbreaking second that Eddie put something online about it, but then they show him the video and he’s devastated.

He’s angry and he’s embarrassed. He’s sad and he’s upset. He reassures his students that everything is fine (even if he can’t convince himself of the same thing) and he does it over and over every class period, and he goes through his day. He ignores the texts from Robin, from Dustin, from Eddie and the party as one by one, they see the video.

Steve’s not going to let the emotions waver into his voice after school when Eddie picks him up. He’s not going to see another video of himself crying on the internet so when Eddie asks if he’s okay, Steve doesn’t say anything at all. He doesn’t say anything when they get home either, not until Eddie says, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For – I know you saw it. I know you saw the video and I’m sorry because it’s my fault that people are filming you, and-“

“It’s not your fault,” Steve tells him and he means it. He means it even as the tears that have been burning his eyes all day finally fall. “It’s not your fault what other people do.”

There is already an uproar on the internet about filming people in crisis and posting it on the internet. There’s an uproar about treating celebrities like they’re actual people. There’s an uproar from fans, celebrities, ordinary people.

The Party all post to their socials about it and they’re clearly angry. Robin goes on a long rant about how fucked up it is to film someone in a doctor’s waiting room and also, maybe, illegal. Dustin encourages everybody to report the video if they see it and block the user, and if they haven’t seen it don’t seek it out. Max got suspended from Twitter for threatening the poster’s life.

Eddie remains eerily silent. His TikTok account remains touched. Some people speculate that he’s probably done with social media. Some think that he’s seeking legal advice. There are theories thrown all over the app, but Eddie’s doing none of that.

He’s barely thought about it at all because he knows what’s coming. Steve can’t be under this much stress and it not lead to something. So, he’s waiting. It’s either a seizure or a migraine, and turns out to be a migraine. A pretty bad one.

Eddie makes a video after he helps Steve into bed and all he says is if he sees another person film him or his family in public, he’ll break their fucking nose.

#Eddie is just barely resisting the urge to ask El to try to find the poster so he can personally beat his ass #steve harrington #eddie munson #eddie munson tiktok saga

[findafight]

I haven’t finished the series yet (I keep having to tap out because the writers keep referring back to episodes that they think they’ve written rather episodes that I actually watched), but I think the big disconnect between their writers and the audience have with regard to Steve is that the show *insists* on treating Steve’s character development as if it’s a “Redemption Arc”, when it is in fact a fairly standard coming-of-age story.

He starts season one coasting through an almost cookie-cutter existence, moulded by the people that he hangs out with. By season four, he’s the lone jock in a group of nerds and geeks of all stripes (Lucas is getting in there though) and has found his soulmate in a weird theatre kid (whose love life he’s arguably more invested in than his own). He has his own tastes and interests, but he’s open to those of his friends as well. He’s the unofficial “adult” of the group and has a leadership position, not because an adult has left him in charge, but because again and again he chooses to take responsibility for The Party’s safety.

[Side note - the way Steve chooses over and over to take responsibility, above and beyond what was asked of him, leading to him being more comfortable in his own skin and sure of who he is VS Jonathan having responsibility thrust upon him at such a formative age that he starts to experience an identity crisis in season four as they’re stripped away from him.

Just. Why didn’t these two have more of a relationship onscreen? Why does this show do so *little* to explore how Jonathan feels about his parentification? Or the ways in which this has hurt him over the years? W H Y ?]

As you’ve pointed out elsewhere(?), the worst of Steve’s actions in season one are the result of him lashing out in anger. But he’s shown to regret these actions, and takes ownership and responsibility of them in a way that feels genuine. Jon and Nancy aren’t there to see him help clean up the graffiti; he didn’t know that Nancy was there when he went to apologise to Jonathan; as far as we know Jonathan still doesn’t know that Steve is the one who replaced his camera.

They didn’t write a stock Stephen King bully - they wrote a male, messier version of Cher Horowitz.

yes! all of this!!

Steve's just a guy who was sort of a shitty teenager but then made the conscious choice to Do Better. He just wanted to apologize! Make things right! and that seemed to lead into making sure his town isn't infested by monsters and that a group of annoying thirteen year olds don't die also doing that. And yet they try to tell us he was a giant mean bully.

honestly I'm going to put the lack of character interaction and development (especially with a cast of the size Stranger things has) on Netflix. If they could have a regular season or even a 12-15 episode season a lot of the inconsistencies and dropped character elements and explore dynamics way more.

Jonathan being thrust into responsibility when Steve actively chose it!!! makes me scream!!! Jonathan needing to figure out who he is, but at the same time not wanting to and avoiding it, while Steve had to figure that out before. Steve might be a bit directionless, but he knows who he is. Jonathan at least thinks he knows what he wants at first but he doesn't know who he is outside of his family. Especially now that Will is growing up and not needing him the same way as before. I think him and steve interacting would be so interesting and i WISH they let us see something other than animosity or ignoring each other. They've got similarities but are soooo different. Just. AHHHhh many thoughtssss

#steve harrington #jonathan byers #stranger things #stranger things meta #greatgodempresspan #findaanswers

[steviesbicrisis]

A lot of things start to make sense since Eddie Munson enters his life.

It goes from the simple things: Eddie patiently explaining the mechanics of D&D so that Dustin would stop using the references against him; Eddie teaching him a few music facts and history, “did you know that Tony Iommi once blew up Richard Branson’s prize carp? Fucking Metal if you ask me”; Eddie helping him fix the drain in his new apartment “with all of your hair you never had to unclog it? You’re such a princess”.

But it’s more than that. Eddie also helps him figure out things about himself.

Like, he can be friends with someone without having that much in common, he’s that type of person who would drop everything he’s doing if someone he cared about would ask it, and also that, apparently, he has a type.

«You clearly have a thing for nerds,» Eddie tells him one day, teasingly.

«What? I definitely don’t!» Steve is outraged that he would even suggest that «I tolerate nerds because for some reason I’m surrounded by them.»

«Oh please! You just told me about your embarrassing crush on Robin, a huge nerd, smart, was in band, and knows like- ten languages. Then there’s Wheeler, also smart, also one of the biggest nerds that Hawkins has ever seen. Don’t let me even touch on the fact that you’re surrounded by baby nerds all the time» Eddie blinds him with a victorious grin «this is why all your other dates go to shit, Harrington. Trust me, date a nerd for a change.»

Steve wants to bite back and prove him wrong but, after Eddie says it, he can’t help think back to his dating history and everything makes sense.

Once again, Eddie helps him figure things out about himself.

But the biggest revelation Eddie helps him out with, comes only after.

Steve finds himself thinking more about this “nerd thing”, and his mind can’t help but go to Eddie himself. He’s a huge nerd, and he has become a big part of his life.

He finds himself noticing small things about him, like what rings he wears on which finger, how he styles his hair depending on his mood, how he smiles when the kids are close to figuring out the plot twists of his campaign, and especially how he always manages to have some sort of physical contact with him, whether by putting an arm on his shoulder, leaning closer to listen to what he’s talking about or grabbing his wrist to get his attention.

He has never been more aware of Eddie’s presence than now, it makes him jumpy but also, he notices, he waits for it, he wants any type of physical contact with him, and even a quick brush on his arm is enough to make his stomach flutter.

And Steve is not stupid. He might be a little oblivious, he might’ve been taught the wrong things -how queer people are the menace of society and how there’s nothing worse than being called “fag” for a man- but he’s been Robin’s best friend for so long that he knows better now.

And he also knows how he feels when he has a crush on someone.

The only option for him is to talk to Robin about it, both of them are surprised at how well Steve is taking it.

Well, he does cry a little bit, he tells Robin that he’s scared, he even tells her that he doesn’t want it, this new part of him that people would not accept him for. She understands, and she’s there every step of Steve’s sexual crisis until he just accepts it.

As if going through a bisexual crisis wasn’t enough, Steve finds himself going through another rite of passage for queer people: falling for a straight person.

Steve and Robin are working their shift at Family Video when a very excited Eddie Munson comes in «Harrington, give me your best romantic crap movie!»

«Eddie Munson, renting a romantic movie? Did aliens abduct you and brainwash you this morning?»

«Ah-ha, very funny! But I can’t do Star Wars on a first date, doesn’t set the right mood. You should know that better than me, lover boy.»

Steve wishes he had prepared himself more for the time Eddie would’ve talked about dating, but he didn’t and now he’s standing there at the counter, completely frozen, doing his best to not let his face fall right in front of his first boy crush. At least, the first one he’s aware of.

«Woah, really? I’m sorry for whoever the unlucky date is» Robin intercepts, and Steve could really kiss her for always knowing how to help him.

Steve can only estrange himself from the conversation, as Eddie is describing this “super hot girl” who is “way out of my league”. Robin ends up being the one helping him with the movie and Steve pretends to be busy with inventory in the back.

Robin comes to find him once Eddie is gone «I gave him the worst romantic movie I could think of.»

Steve chuckles and hugs her tight «thank you.»

Out of all the things Eddie has helped him out with, Steve wishes he would also teach him how to fall out of love with him.

[TBD: I'm fixing it I promise!! Sorry for the straight Eddie content guys lmao]

Part 2 | Part 3

#steddie #steve harrington #bi steve harrington #gay eddie munson #steve and eddie #eddie munson #stranger things #steddie headcanon #steve x eddie #platonic stobin #Steve falls first #Eddie will fall harder #sbc writes #ficlets

[steviewashere]

Steddie Fic Recs. Part 8!

Previous Recommendations: Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven

Okay, so I don't know how this got away from me, but I missed posting my recommendations on Tuesday. (Again.) I'm here now, though. And I've got some more gay men being gay little doods for you to read.

If there are any Tumblr blogs tagged and you'd like to not be, feel free to reach out to be removed. I have no qualms doing so. I respect y'all.

As always, the tags and themes vary on all of these fics. Heed all tags, ratings, and archive warnings with caution.

good side by ghosttotheparty

“They don’t talk about it, even though it keeps happening.

Their eyes keep locking, and they keep lingering. Looking at each other like they’re trying to use fucking telepathy or something. Like they’re sharing silent secrets that no one else is allowed to know. Secrets that they don’t even know.”

Chapters: 1/1, WC: 13,336, Rating: Explicit no Archive Warnings apply College/University AU Roommates AU

————— 2. it’s darker than you thought now by emchant3d @emchant3d

“‘Do you even want to fucking be here?’ he yells.

‘Not when you’re acting like this!’ Eddie says, and Steve’s throat goes tight like there’s a fist wrapped around it.

Or, the boy with abandonment issues falls for the boy who always runs”

Chapters: 1/1, WC: 7,850, Rating: Mature no Archive Warnings apply

————— 3. Like a Rainbow in the Dark by parsnips_and_meth

“Perhaps Steve was ill. There was no reason for this sort of fuss — he hardly knew the guy, and Eddie hadn’t exactly been the most forthcoming when he had visited him in the hospital. He had quipped, sure, pain-hazed and slurring, had smirked and winked and thrust his arms about, but he hadn’t really talked. He’d deflected — classic, really — and Steve hadn’t meddled, hadn’t done anything about the sleepless bruises under his eyes or paper-thinness of his skin, or the way he had sat in the hospital bed coiled, ready to jump and run.

Because Steve didn’t know Eddie. And Eddie didn’t know Steve. Which is why he was surprised when, on a quiet, drizzly Tuesday morning at The Enigma Pig, the walkie-talkie on his hip crackled to life.

(In a moment of need, Eddie radios Steve for help.)”

Chapters: 3/3, WC: 11,284, Rating: Mature without using Archive Warnings Trans Eddie Munson

————— 4. Can’t Fight This Feeling Anymore by steddieasitgoes @steddieasitgoes

“Vecna is dead. Or so Steve thinks until Dustin is screaming ‘Code Red’ through a radio. Steve runs out of the house with conditioner still in his hair to save the day only to learn the ‘code red’ is that Eddie Munson is being a little shit and doesn’t want to go to his graduation ceremony tomorrow. Steve’s going to kill them both.

Or:

Steve convinces Eddie to go to graduation and ends up regretting the decision when Eddie shows up looking better than ever, sending Steve into a major sexuality crisis. And more fun ensues!”

Chapters: 11/11, WC: 71,899, Rating: Mature no Archive Warnings apply Part of a series: Time of My Life (And I Owe it All to You)

#stranger things #fic rec #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson

[hotluncheddie]

I was thinking about how Steve would deal with his sexuality crisis and how when he's tryna figure everything out he maybe has this moment of panic because he thought he'd stopped lying to himself and trying to be someone he's not but maybe that's not the case at all and he hasn't stopped pretending at all. And he just starts spiralling and it makes him want to stop thinking about pretend it isn't there so he just shoves it into a proverbial box so he can ignore it

:( sad stevie baby hours for us then anon?

sad sad self sabotaging steve. my dude. my wet little guy.

the idea that he though he was doing better, being himself, not lying to anyone not even when he’s alone. maybe he doesn’t like change and he’s hanging on to fragments more closely now, gripping things tightly in his palms. where he used just let it wash over him, no point giving it thought, things don’t change anyway. but then everything did, right? everything changed and so did he and now he has all this stuff. all this stuff attached directly to his heart strings.

and then he likes boys.

he likes girls but he likes boys. has liked boys. wants boys, too.

now there's boys and he starts to shut down.

Just that feeling of 'i'm doing better' but then it kinda turn into 'okay i'm tired lets just get though it' then it keeps going 'just one more week, just one more day' and then you look around and it feels like everything you've built in crumbling away around you. and that person you built up and thought you created was actually formed on a mudslide, your foundations were never gonna hold. it's all fallen apart without you really noticing

he doesn't have the words to describe how. there's a war happening between what he thinks he should feel, what maybe he does feel and who he thinks he is. who he was and who he wants to be are there somewhere too. but it's lost in the soup of his head.

but he has robin right? with her bright light and unconditional love. but this thing, this new thing. he's always been that right? this boy girl thing. so, he's a liar then. he never told her so he lied. lied to bright, beautiful robin. how could he have done that?

and there's eddie. eddie so much a part of this boy girl thing. eddie who feels like he could be his. feels like summer rain on his skin, feels like citrus tang on his tongue. but eddie knows who he is, think so deeply and is so true, so distinctly and explosively himself. and steve doesn't even know one bit about who he is. not really. not now. after this thing. its torn it all down. everything changed again but this time the cracks aren't through the town they're in his skin, at his roots.

can't bring eddie into that. can't let robin risk falling in.

but then maybe they jump through those cracks, start hiding things in the crevices. little beams of starlight and greenery. start helping him see that those cracks are quite pretty, maybe they let you see a little more of his skin. that this mud slide he's on feels a lot like grounding. like barefeet on grass and leaves turning with the sun. that maybe this boy girl thing is new, and old, and its so so steve. that maybe he can be okay again, build something new and live a little differently. but still true. because its always been true right? all those feeling, all those smaller him's and things locked away. they're peeking out of the cracks now. peaking out into this thing. this thing he can be. always be and always play with. even if it takes along time, that okay, it'll take all his life, maybe. to figure out he likes oranges, likes daisies the most, likes girls, like boys, likes this trying to be himself.

and maybe those hidden crevices start to shine a little brighter, the plants start to bloom. maybe robin never left and never will, find him a bathroom floor all his own. sees that always and right now are sisters and she can take his heart and keep it next to her own, until he's ready to have it back again, hold it real safe this time.

and eddie keeps turning up on his tongue, keeps dripping all over his skin. becomes his eddie. bis boy. his one. his new side of the boy girl thing. a this boy thing and love thing. romance on the mudslide. kisses under starlight.

#couldn't let him just be sad #dunno if it answered ur ask but it felt good to write #felt a little cool and little cozy to write #ty for the ask as always #lovely anon #hotlunch #steddie #steve x eddie #<3 #sad stevie baby hours #stobin #ask #drabbles

[runninriot]

written for the @steddieholidaydrabbles

Day 17

prompt: Platonic Stobin | words: 930 | rated: t | no cw | tags: best friends Steve & Robin, established Steddie, Steve's in crisis mode but Robin is there to help

Escape Plan

   „What if we’re not gonna make it?“

Steve is pacing up and down the corridor, nervous hands tugging at his own hair, messing up the carefully styled mop. He’s been doing that for at least 15 minutes now. Steve is stressed.

Robin has tried everything to calm him down, to reassure him everything will be fine. But it’s like he’s not listening, or maybe he doesn’t hear her over his own anxious rambling.

She’s never seen him like that. On edge, yeah. Sometimes overly dramatic, too. But this, the way he’s freaking out right now? That’s new.

And see, she gets it. Today is the day. It all comes down to this one moment. Today they’ll define the rest of their lives. She knows everything will turn out right in the end. They’re destined to make it. There is absolutely no doubt about it but all of Steve’s worry is beginning to rub off on her.

   “Steeeeve, please! You need to relax. You’re starting to freak me out. It’s alright. You’re alright! Jeez, babe, stop the- STEVE! STOP!”

Steve freezes when she yells at him, turns to look at her with teary eyes. It breaks her heart a little to see him like this.

   “I don’t know if I can do this. What if- what if I fuck it up? What if it doesn’t work and one of us gets hurt? What if- hey! Why’re you smiling like that?”

Robin closes the distance between them, takes his hand in hers.

   “Babe. I want you to take a deep breath and listen to me. You won’t fuck this up. There is no way in hell this won’t work out. You two have been through so much already, I don’t think there’s anything you couldn’t work through together.”

Steve huffs out a breath.

   “But-“

Robin shushes him immediately. She’s not gonna give his doubts any more room, won’t let him spiral more than he already has.

   “You are the best thing that could’ve ever happened to him and he knows that. He loves you more than anything in this world.”

Steve’s eyes light up just a little bit at her words, lips forming a tentative smile. But Robin can literally see the cogs in his brain turning. He’s not quite there yet.

   “You know, if you don’t want to do this, just say the word and I’ll get you out of here. I’ll get the car ready and wait for you outside this window. We can run away together and start a new life somewhere like, Mexico, maybe. Or Canada.”

It’s meant as a joke, mostly. But truth is, she would do exactly that if he asked her to. She’d do just about anything for her favourite dingus.

Because Steve is her soulmate, her best friend, her family. Robin will forever be thankful for crossing paths with Steve all those years ago. Even after everything she got dragged into – going through literal hell, fighting monsters from another dimension, getting kidnapped and drugged by Russians, nearly dying more than once. She’d do all of it again if it meant to have Steve in her life. So wherever it’ll take him, she’ll follow. She’d leave everyone and everything behind if that’s what it took. They’re a package deal. You can’t get one without the other.

Eddie knows that, accepted it right from the start. He even came to her first, before proposing to Steve. Robin remembers how nervous he was.

    “I love him so much, Robs. And I- I know it doesn’t necessarily need rings or- some stupid certificate as proof for anything but- I know he always dreamed about getting married. He gave that up by choosing me, accepted that he couldn’t have this as a man in love with another man. But now we can and- he deserves everything. I want to marry him. I’ll even take his name, I don’t care. I just- if things were different I’d ask his parents but since they’re out of the picture... Robin, can I ask Steve to marry me?”

She remembers their shared tears of joy. Remembers the secret plotting. Remembers Steve’s face when Eddie dropped to one knee and revealed the black velvet covered box holding the ring. Remembers how happy Steve was.

Robin knows that hasn’t changed. He’s just-

   “I get that you’re scared, Steve. This is a huge step. But you’ve been together for so long now; you know exactly what you’re getting yourselves into. He wouldn’t have asked you to marry him if he wasn’t sure about this. He wants to spend the rest of his life with you. To love and to hold and to fuck nasty on the kitchen floor.”

Robin grins, wiggles her eyebrows teasingly, and finally she can see the tension in his shoulders ease. Steve barks out a laugh, loud and unrestrained, and it fills Robin with all the happiness of the world.

   “Just remember, today changes nothing about your relationship. It’s just a little bonus, the cherry on top.”

   “Thank you, Robs.”

Robin pulls Steve into a tight hug, holds him for a minute or two until there’s a knock on the door.

   “Ready?” she asks.

Steve takes another deep breath.

   “Ready.”

   “Let’s go make Eddie a honest man, then. Shall we, Mr Munson?”

Robin knows that everything will be fine. That Steve and Eddie will get their happy ever after because they're in love and nothing can tear them apart. But just in case, just to be sure, she checks for the passport in her purse and the car keys in her blazer pocket.

#steddieholidaydrabbles #prompt platonic stobin #robin buckley #steve harrington

[ariesbilly]

Inspired by a dream I had during my nap lmfao + a little bit of the she will be loved music video with a twist but like

Billy in his 20s hooking up with mr harrington who’s a rich divorcee kinda going through a midlife crisis, hence becoming a sugar daddy to a guy his sons age. At first Steve loathes billy, always hanging around his house, lounging by the pool in the skimpiest speedos (if he bothers wearing anything at all), wearing his dads clothes, sometimes wearing Steve’s clothes, eating all his food. It’s annoying

And it’s not a real relationship (small blessings) but the whole thing still skeeves Steve out, and initially he puts most of the blame on Billy

Until one night billy comes over for a date, but mr Harrington has a business emergency he’s gotta run out for, “shouldn’t take too long, just stay put and hang out with Steve”

Steve does NOT want to do that, is planning to hide in his room or something but, it’s his house, he’s not gonna make himself a prisoner in it.

So anyway after some initial awkwardness they slowly start talking to each other, easing into it. Eventually Steve can’t hold his tongue anymore tho and he’s gotta ask why the hell billy is with his dad, cuz like, it’s obviously not love or anything real, right?

And billy confesses it’s definitely not love (big shocker there), but it’s security. Talks about how shitty his dad was growing up and with mr h it’s nice having someone take care of him, financially, sexually…(Steve gags)

And after that Steve sees Billy for what he is; just a poor sad kid trying to get by in the world, find some belonging.

Things change between them after that. They get friendly, hang out whenever Steve’s dad isn’t around and billys waiting. It’s nice.

Steve’s…maybe developing feelings. A dangerous thing given everyone’s relationships but honestly it’s just making him mad knowing he could give billy something real if given the opportunity while his dad is just… passing time. Doing something to get him through his sad miserable life.

It all comes to a head when one night while billys over, gone off to the bathroom or something, Steve and his dad get into a huge fight over Steve’s life having no direction and Steve once again confronting his father about how fucked up this whole thing with billy is.

Low blows are exchanged. Mr Harrington threatens to cut Steve off. Steve storms out of the room, running on pure rage and spite. Runs into Billy as he’s coming out of the bathroom and just…kisses him. Shoves him back into the bathroom and locks the door and doesn’t give him time to speak before he’s ripping billys shirt off.

And billy this entire time has been harboring his own developing crush so while he’s confused what brought this all on…he’s not exactly complaining.

Steve ends up bending billy over the counter, Billy lets him have his way. Their eyes lock in the mirror…everything changes.

So from then on billy is still seeing mr h but hooking up with Steve on the side. Under the same roof. (He’s such a whore god bless him)

And Mr Harrington is no dummy. He sees their relationship changing. Notices the flirty touches and banter when they think they’re alone. He’s not happy about it.

And a certain point billys emotionally checked out of his thing with mr h but like he still needs the money.

And Steve’s not happy about this but…it’s not like he can offer much better

Mr Harrington of course does not like to be made to feel like he’s having the wool pulled over his eyes.

If he gets angry at billy one night and is grabbing him and shoving him and Steve runs in between them to protect Billy… what then

So anyway billy chooses Steve and Steve chooses Billy over his dad’s money (which like…he still had his mom so it’s not a total loss…) and they run off into the sunset together the end :)

#harringrove

[stevesbipanic]

Lavendar Haze

Cross posted on ao3

Part 1 of my Midnights Collection, more to come to subscribe for updates on ao3 or just check here regularly! :))

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Meet me at midnight

Robin sees the familiar headlights pass behind her house, parking behind the big oak tree. She’s told Steve a hundred times that he could just come through the front door, but he says it’s more fun this way. She knew he was coming; he had called ahead, as he always does. Another nightmare, a year on from Starcourt and they can’t escape the horrors they witnessed there.

Steve climbs inside with the grace of a dork that’s done this before. He didn’t even change out of his sweatpants before coming over. Wordlessly, she lifts the blankets allowing him to slip in beside her, wrapping their arms around each other, relaxing in the knowledge that they were both safe.

Staring at the ceiling with you

Oh, you don't ever say too much

And you don't really read into

My melancholia

She knew Steve could tell she had had one too, he’s good at reading her these days. Neither of them wants to talk about it though, they’re awake and safe now. They’ve shared plenty of nights going over what happened, bringing it up doesn’t help anymore. Steve runs his fingers through her hair, soothing both of them. Comforting her without words is what he’s best at. He knows and that’s what matters.

I've been under scrutiny (yeah, oh yeah)

You handle it beautifully (yeah, oh yeah)

All this shit is new to me (yeah, oh yeah)

“I wish I could tell my parents what happened to us. I swear they look right through my mask some days, they know something is wrong and I’ll never be able to tell them.”

“I know Robbie, I guess that’s the one good thing about absent parents. Since 1983 all the people that have needed to know what happened to me were right beside me.”

Robin gives a sad smile at that, curling closer into Steve’s chest. She knew the Buckleys would adopt Steve if they could.

“We should talk about happier things, cheer ourselves up. How’s Eddie?” Robin said smirking at the now blushing boy.

“Eddie is fine, him and Wayne are all set up in the new house, we hung up his shiny new diploma this morning.”

“You two are so cute it’s gross, when are you going to tell him?”

“I don’t know if I should Robs, all this liking boys stuff is new to me and I don’t want him to think he’s an experiment or something.”

I feel a lavender haze creeping up on me

So real, I'm damned if I do give a damn what people say

No deal, the 1950s shit they want from me

I just wanna stay in that lavender haze

Helping Steve with his sexuality crisis a few months ago had been an experience. Robin only knew about gays and lesbians, the two of them had had to go to a hole-in-the-wall bookshop in Indianapolis to find a zine that would explain what Steve had been feeling. Robin didn’t know you could like both, since she never had.

Life was different than what her parents had grown up in. The world was changing, and there were new words to help young people like Steve come to terms with their identities. It had taken some explaining to Eddie, showing him the zine and other things, they’d collected. He seemed to understand, but she could also see how it might bring up some old trauma with Eddie who had been an “experiment” before.

All they keep asking me (all they keep asking me)

Is if I'm gonna be your bride

“Mom still thinks you’re my boyfriend. She wants to know if we’re getting married now that I’ve graduated. Her and Dad got hitched right out of high school, so I think they want the same for me, which is gross.”

The only kind of girl they see (the only kind of girl they see)

Is a one night or a wife

“My parents did the same. When I graduated they told me if I wasn’t going to go to college I might as well be useful and marry into a good family. Said I need to stop being childish with all the girls around town and grow up. I hadn’t even been going on many dates, King Steve was the dating kind, not me.”

I find it dizzying (yeah, oh yeah)

They're bringing up my history (yeah, oh yeah)

But you aren't even listening (yeah, oh yeah)

It all felt so overwhelming the expectations of society and parents and the world. For a moment though it did feel good that their biggest problem was parents and not flesh-eating monsters. Steve was still talking but Robin’s mind had started forming a plan to solve both of their problems.

I feel a lavender haze creeping up on me

So real, I'm damned if I do give a damn what people say

No deal, the 1950s shit they want from me

I just wanna stay in that lavender haze (ooh, ooh, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa)

That lavender haze

“What if we get married?”

“What?”

“I love you, you love me. Let’s get married. No more stupid questions from my parents, you can say a big fuck you to yours since I doubt they see my family as a ‘good family’ and more importantly no more getting separated.”

It’s the one thing they hadn’t brought up since Spring. After carrying Eddie’s bleeding body out of the Upside Down and to the hospital, Steve had collapsed from blood loss. With no legal guardians or spouse around, no one was allowed to see him until he was stable, they weren’t even told what was going on. It had been the worst 24 hours of Robin’s life knowing nothing about what was happening with Steve, her best friend, her platonic soulmate.

“Fuck it, let’s get married.”

Talk your talk and go viral

I just need this love spiral

Get it off your chest

Get it off my desk (get it off my desk)

Talk your talk and go viral

I just need this love spiral

Get it off your chest

Get it off my desk

They started with telling the Buckley’s, Steve had slipped out the next morning to steal a good enough ring from his mother, she wouldn’t miss it anyway. Robin’s parents were thrilled of course. Next was telling Eddie and Nancy, which was interesting.

“You’re getting what?”

“Married Eds.”

“Why?”

“Cause we love each other and society sucks so.”

“Fair point but you’re definitely not together right?”

“No Eds, still platonic with a capital P, I haven’t become a girl over night and Robs is still very much a lesbian.”

“Ok I guess I can get behind this then, need a date to the wedding?”

“Are you asking me to my own wedding?”

“Sure am.”

“Thought you’d never ask.”

Nancy had been similar, wanting to make sure this is what they wanted and weren’t just being stupid.

“Oh no we’re very stupid still, Nance.”

“Yeah, this is just low on our stupid scale. Want to be my maid of honour since dingus can’t be?”

The kids were ecstatic.

“I knew you were together!”

“Dustin, you know Robin is a lesbian.”

“Oh right. Well can I be your best man?”

“Of course, kid, wouldn’t want anyone other than my brother.”

Hopper and Joyce had been happy at the news, claiming it would give everyone something good to celebrate.

I feel (I feel) a lavender haze creeping up on me

So real, I'm damned if I do give a damn what people say

No deal (no deal), the 1950s shit they want from me

I just wanna stay in that lavender haze

(Ooh, ooh, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa)

The wedding was small and perfect. They held it in the woods behind Hopper’s cabin, just their small group of friends who were more like family. Robin wore a dark brown suit which had used to be Jonathan’s and Steve worse a white button down and let the girls put flowers in his hair. The wedding was very them, dumb vows like “you’ll always be my dingus,” and “I want to be your schmuck forever.” A perfect day.

Get it off your chest

Get it off my desk

That lavender haze

I just wanna stay

Years later when it was legal for them to marry their romantic partners, Steve and Robin stayed married. Their partners understood, Robin and Steve were soulmates and should never be apart. Brought together in trauma and staying together through love; there would be no more days when they didn’t know if the other were ok. As the world kept growing there would be new words for them but they didn’t need more labels, they knew what they were to each other and that’s all that mattered.

I just wanna stay

In that lavender haze

#stobin #platonic stobin #platonic with a capital p #platonic soulmates #steve harrignton #robin buckley #minor steddie #stranger things #stranger things s4 #my fic #ao3 #midnights #taylor swift #song fic #lavendar haze

[boldlyvoid]

Put On The Red Light | Part One

18+ Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington

Summary: When Eddie's long-lost cousin, Roxy, shows up on his doorstep, he must accept that his whole life is changing once again.

Warnings: angst, anxiety, jealous Eddie, sexuality crisis, insecure Eddie, parental issues, implied/referenced parental abuse/neglect, background Vickie/Robin, Will/Gareth, Wayne/Mr. Clarke

word count: 9.9k

masterlist

A few loud knocks on the front door rip him from his slumber, he turns to his alarm clock to see it's after 1 pm, Wayne should be home to get it… But the knocks keep coming, more frequent and needier than ever, forcing him out of bed. 

He tumbles down the hall with a groan and his eyes still closed, he rubs his face on the walk to the door and opens it with a sigh, “what?” 

He’s expecting it to be Dustin or Max, or Steve maybe… Not a beautiful woman. 

“Oh, um, hi,” she waves. “Does Wayne Munson live here by chance?” 

He shakes the sleep from his face and blinks at her a few times, registering that she was real, he nods. “Yeah, why?” 

“Is he here right now?” She stands on her tiptoes and looks past his shoulder and into the trailer. 

“No, he’s not… once again, why?” He steps back so she doesn’t bump into him while trying to get a look inside, and all she does is walk into the trailer through the gap between him and the door. “Hey! You can’t just walk into my house? Who are you?” 

“I’m apparently Wayne Munson’s daughter,” she explains, looking around the room at everything, “let me guess, you’re his other kid?” 

“Woah, woah, woah,” both his hands go up in defence, he is too tired for this shit. “What are you talking about? Wayne doesn’t have any kids?” 

She turns to him with her hand out, ready to shake his, “sorry, I’m Roxy… well, Roxanne but everyone calls me Roxy.”

“Hi… I’m Eddie… Edward,” he takes her hand delicately but she grips his tight. “Munson as well…”

“Nice to meet you,” she gives him a beautiful smile, it’s almost like looking in a mirror. 

They shared a lot of similar features, dark curly hair being one of them, which is funny seeing as Wayne is balding. She’s way too pretty to be Wayne’s kid. And if she is, that makes her Eddie’s cousin and now he thinks his cousin is pretty… he drops her hand and pulls away.

“My mom reportedly fucked a man named Wayne Munson back in ’66, she never saw him again and never knew where he lived to even track him down and tell him that she was having his kid. So I’ve tracked him down and now I’m here and I want to meet my dad.” 

He laughs at how crazy it is, but it sounds about right, “uh, well, I’m his nephew but he basically raised me so, I mean, I kinda feel like his son?” 

“So we’re cousins,” she beams a smile at him, “I’ve always wanted a cousin!” 

“Yeah, I suppose so…" he can’t believe it either. “But, uh, Waynes not here as you can see, and I don’t know where he is but you can stay and wait for him?” 

“Okay, cool,” she smiles again, turning back towards the wall full of mugs and hats and getting closer to it. She examines it carefully, “so, is it just you two here? He doesn’t have like a wife or anything?” 

“Nope, just us… I uh, I’m going to change,” he references down to his bare chest and ripped pyjama bottoms.

“Okay,” she doesn’t mind, she barely pays any attention to him, instead she’s looking through Wayne’s things on the walls. 

Back in his room he hops into his jeans like a maniac, throws on some deodorant and a new shirt, brushes his teeth and fixes his hair and then it really hits him. “She’s your fucking cousin dude, chill out.” 

He heads back into the main room full of shame, she’s moved on to the tv cabinet to look at all their tapes and movies, “I’m actually late for something, but uh, I guess feel free to stay here? There’s nothing worth stealing so, even if you’re lying I don’t think Wayne will care that I left you here.” 

That makes her laugh, “I’ll watch over the place, have fun, cuz!” She gives him a wave and a smile, one that looks a lot like Waynes. 

“Thanks…” he gives her a small wave back and all but runs to his van. 

He doesn’t care where he’s going, he just needs to drive. His mind was completely warped by the knowledge that he had a secret cousin and she was about to infiltrate his life. Wayne, his Wayne, had a daughter. She was Wayne’s blood and much more so than Eddie is, he’s just Waynes brothers kid. He can’t help but worry that having a daughter is going to change Wayne’s life and Eddie will be slowly replaced by the child of his own that he always wanted… 

Somehow he ends up parked at Family video, right beside Steve’s car, like his body knew what to do to make him feel better before his mind did. 

He heads inside quickly and makes his way right to Steve, “you’ll never fucking guess what just happened to me.” 

“What did you do?” Steve smirks, knowing by the ghostly look on Eddie’s face that it’s something embarrassing that he’s going to get to tease him about. 

“This pretty girl showed up at my trailer looking for Wayne and I was like half asleep and half naked and she just barged in and told me she’s my cousin?” 

“You have a hot cousin?” Steve exclaims, excited until he sees how Eddie’s not happy about it, “man, sucks to be you… is she still at your place?” 

“Hey,” Eddie points at him, “her being hot is not the point, dude, what if Wayne kicks me out so his real kid can come live with him? What if he likes her more than me? What if she moves to town and everyone likes her more than me?” 

“That’s a given, bud,” Steve teases him, placing a hand on his shoulder to pull him in for a much-needed hug. “I’m kidding, you’re going to be fine… as long as you don’t mind me hitting on your hot cousin.” 

“Can you shut up,” Eddie manages to smile as he hugs him back. Holding Steve with his chin on his shoulder, he felt a lot more relaxed than before. Steve always had this effect on him.  

“What's this about?” They hear Robin come barreling towards them from the back room. “I want in on a hug.” She all but tackles them as she joins in, “what’s going on?” 

“Eddie has a new hot cousin,” Steve teases, extending an arm around Robin to invite her in. 

“Seriously?” She looks up at Eddie from the middle of the hug. 

He nods, “apparently Wayne has a real kid.” 

“Oh shit,” she feels his pain, “does he know yet?” 

Eddie shakes his head and pulls away from the group hug, “she’s just in the trailer, I kinda ran when I realized she’s actually related to me and too pretty for me to talk to, anyway.” 

“So, she’s just in your trailer all alone?” Robin can’t help but laugh. “what’s Wayne going to do when he gets there?” 

—

Wayne walks into the trailer with his hands full of groceries, Eddie’s van is gone but there’s a figure pacing back and forth in front of the living room window, “hey, I thought you were— who the heck are you?” Wayne places all the bags on the counter and stares at the woman. 

“Hi,” she stands still and awkwardly waves at him. “I’m Roxanne, Roxanne Crutchstone, my mom is—

“Janine,” says with a gasp and freezes. His jaw dropped, and his heart beats double-time in his chest as he stares at the daughter of the woman he once loved. Albeit for one night, he felt a lot for her in those few hours they spent alone in the back of his chevy. And now he was seeing why. “You’re mine aren’t you?” 

She nods like her head is trapped on a spring, not knowing what else to say as her eyes bubble up with tears. “My mom didn’t know how to find you, she always told me about you, I always knew I had a dad who would probably want me and— and then I saw Eddie Munson on the news and I knew, I knew you’d be here. I knew you’d be my dad.”

He makes his way to her and wraps her up in his arms, he kisses the top of her curly head of hair and that’s when she starts to sob. She’s always wanted a dad. He holds her like a father, he smells like a dad would, and he’s kind and loving and completely hers from now on. 

“I’m so sorry I didn’t know about you sooner,” he whispers against her hair. “But you’re welcome here all the time… where are you living? How’d you get here? Are you safe?” He asks as he pulls back, instantly concerned and in full father mode. 

“I took the bus into town a few days ago, I’m living at the apartment complex down by the hospital, it’s above the general store and post office…” she explains. “I’m taking a year off before I go to college, I thought I’d come live here and try and get to know you a bit?” 

“So you’ve graduated high school?” He beams, knowing she must be the same age as the older two girls Eddie hangs around with.

She nods, “just last month.” 

“Damn, you’re a smartie aren’t cha?” He teases, “Eddie didn’t until— wait did you meet Eddie?” 

She nods again, “he was here, he let me in, but he said he was late for something and didn’t mind leaving me here alone, knowing that I’m yours.” 

“Okay, good. He’s technically my brother's kid but I raised him so he’s mine—

“Eddie said the same thing,” she smiles, a lot like Eddie. 

“He’s my boy. And it’s important for you two to get to know each other and get along, he’s very special to me… you might hear some shit about him from the folks in town but I promise you, he is nothing but kind and wonderful,” he can’t help but protect Eddie too. “He was accused of some awful things earlier this year and he’s still getting over it, but I can assure you, you’re safe with him and his friends.” 

“He seemed really sweet… he was half asleep but he was nice,” she agrees. “But uh, that’s kinda how I found you? I figured that the Eddie Munson on the news was probably related to the Wayne Munson my mom slept with… and she was worried about me coming out here cause he might actually be a murderer… but, what really happened? Cause he doesn’t seem like he has a vicious bone in his body.” 

“I wish I knew it all, honestly, but a girl died in our last trailer and he ran 'cause it was terrifying and so—

“So he looked really guilty,” she sympathizes. 

“Extremely guilty… but then more kids from the school died in strange places, there was a huge earthquake, the lab in town took the fall and he was let off the hook,” Wayne simplifies it down to just one sentence. 

“That’s unfortunate, but at least he still has some friends, you said?” 

“He didn’t graduate on time like you did, so most his friends are still high school age but he has some his own, like Steve… he’s probably going to hit on you, just beware,” Wayne teases. “That boy is a walking flirt. With absolutely everybody.”

“Noted,” she can’t help but smile. 

“Gosh, you look so much like your mom but there’s also so much of Eddie,” he gestures to her appearance. “The hair, your big brown eyes, your button nose…” Wayne boops his finger on her nose with a smile. “wow.” 

“Mom always said I got my nose from you,” she shares fondly. 

“She’s doing okay?” Wayne can’t help but wonder. 

“Oh yeah, she’s actually moving in with her boyfriend now that I’m out of the house,” she explains. “I grew up just outside of Chicago, we lived with my nanny and pops the whole time…”

“Right, I remember,” Wayne can recall all the way back to that night, he was visiting Chicago for a concert, and she was having a weekend out with friends, one thing led to another and now here she is. “So, Roxanne? Is that what you prefer to be called?” 

She shakes her head, “no, everyone calls me Roxy, I’m more of a Roxy.” 

“Yeah,” he takes a look at her with a sweet smile, “come sit,” he moves them over to the couch again and sits right beside her. “Tell me everything, I want to know who you are.” 

It feels like a lot of pressure, but he’s so calming and fatherly that she opens up quite easily. “Where should I start, dad?” 

“The beginning,” Wayne smiles, tearing up a bit at the name he always wanted to be called. It wasn’t often Eddie called him dad, that was saved for high emotional moments… this was easy and new and everything he wanted. 

—

When Eddie gets back to the trailer, Wayne and Roxy are still sitting on the couch, deep into a story about Wayne’s childhood that he’s heard a million times. 

“Eds! You’re home,” Wayne extends an arm out to him, drawing Eddie into the living room. “You met Roxy?” 

“I did,” he gives her a sweet smile. “I see you’re getting along real well…” it hurts only a little, the way they’re bonding isn’t helping his anxiety that Wayne isn’t going to love him anymore now that he has a real kid. 

Wayne just shakes his head, staring at her with amazement, Eddie’s seen that look before when he’s performed with his uncle in the audience. Wayne loved her already like a real good dad should, he took her in instantly and as much as it killed Eddie to see, he knew Roxy deserved this. Every kid deserved a good dad and Wayne was the best. 

“Yeah, she’s awesome… you two should hang out when I head to work?” 

“I’d love to,” Roxy’s full of smile, more than willing to get to know her new cousin. 

“Which I’ve gotta get ready for,” Wayne glances at his watch and stands as soon as he sees the time.  “Roxy’s moved to town, she’s living over in the apartments downtown—

“Above the stores?” Eddie asks, he’s well aware of those apartments. He lived in one with his mom before she died. Before he had to move in with Wayne. They’re cheap and gross and he may not remember much from back then, but he remembers he hates it there.

She nods, “yeah, they’ve been remodelled recently, they’re really nice.” 

“I’m sure,” he replies, it comes out a lot snarkier than he anticipated. “Uh, if you wanted to hang out, my friends and I have a little pizza party every Friday night, if you don’t mind meeting a few more new people tonight?” 

“Yeah, I’m down,” she sounds actually really excited. “Wayne was telling me all about your friends, you have so many?” 

He nods, “yeah, been through hell and back together, it’s kinda hard to lose ‘em now.” 

Wayne pats his shoulder as he passes him, heading to the bathroom to get ready for work. Now it’s just the two of them. 

She stands up with a smile and smooths out her shirt, “is this an okay outfit to wear?” 

He nods, “yeah, I’m not going to change either, so…” 

“Cool… we’re cool, right?” She asks, she can tell somethings off. 

Eddie just nods, pushing the jealousy aside, “yeah, I’m good, it’s just weird for me. Y’know?”

She nods, “yeah, no, I get it, I’m sorry for just barging into your life.”

He shrugs it off and walks to the phone, “it’s cool, really… I’m just going to call Steve and give them the heads up that you’re coming… is there a pizza topping you want?” 

She scurries over to him with excitement. She moves like he does, weird and unbalanced, she jumps to him instead of taking a last step and rocks back and forth on her feet, “what do you usually get?” 

“Uh,” he’s a bit taken aback by how comfortable she gets with him so quick. He physically steps back too, “we get 3 meat lovers for the boys, a Hawaiian for Argyle, Max and El and a vegetarian one for Robin and Nancy… but we can throw in whatever as long as Argyle gets the order in time…” 

“Ooo, okay, I’m good with some Hawaiian, actually,” she smiles, surprised that someone else in his group liked it too. “Your group sounds interesting…” 

“They are,” he agrees, picking up the phone and dialling the number of the video store. 

She leans against the table and smiles at him before she sits on top of it, kicking her feet, she’s content being there. 

He isn’t. 

It’s weird having a girl he doesn’t know too well in his trailer after everything that happened last time. It was different when Max, Robin and Nancy were in his trailer after Chrissy… they were in charge and saving the day. They knew what was going on. Now he’s bringing an outsider into their group and she will never know what really happened that week in March. But she feels like family… probably because she is. Something in the way she smiles feels like looking in a mirror but he likes her a little more than his own reflection— 

“Family Video Hawkins, Steve speaking.” Eddie hears in his ear, drawing him away from his thoughts. 

“Hey, Stevie… Roxy said she’d love to join us tonight and she’s another freak who likes pineapple so tell Argyle to throw in a second Hawaiian,” Eddie can’t help but smile, he too liked pineapple on pizza, occasionally. It must run in the family. 

“Ew, okay,” Steve says as if he hates it but he’s smiling too, Eddie can hear it. “I’ll go next door and tell him in a sec.” 

“Sounds good, okay, I’ll see you in a few hours,” Eddie says instead of goodbye. 

“You will,” Steve doesn’t say goodbye either but they both hang up. 

“So… Stevie, huh?” 

He nods, “yep.” 

“Tell me about him?” 

“He’s my friend… one of my best friends,” Eddie says with a completely serious face and then his jaw tightens and he rubs his molars together to stay calm and collected. Steve was special to him. He didn’t have to explain that to anyone if he didn’t want to. 

“Okay,” she puts her hands up in defeat and hops off the table, “what are some other names I should know besides Argyle and Stevie?” 

“Uh, well,” he runs his fingers through his hair and wonders where to start. “So my 3 closest buddies growing up are Gareth, Jeff and Kevin, they’re in my band…”

“Oh, you’re a musician too?” 

Great, he thinks to himself. What else is she taking from me? 

He nods, “yeah and then Steve's best friend is Robin she’s cool, not sure if she’s going to bring Vickie or not this time they have a bit of a tumultuous friendship so, watch out for that one.”

“Sounds juicy,” she teases. 

He just nods, “and then Nancy and Jonathan are always there 'cause we have it at Jonathan’s parent's place, Joyce and Hop, he’s the chief of police, they have a new house here with a big basement we can use.” 

“That’s cute!” 

“yeah and Jon's brother Will has a gaggle of friends too, they’re 15, very rambunctious and too many hold on,” he counts on his fingers, “Will, Dustin, Lucas, Erika, Max, Mike, El and… yeah no, that’s it. There’s 7 of them.” 

“Holy shit?” She can’t believe it. “And you guys are cool having kids around?” 

He shrugs, “they’ve been through some shit, they’re not really as immature as you’d expect a bunch of 15-year-olds to be.” 

“Well, I’m excited to meet them,” she beams a smile at him. “Thank you for inviting me, it means a lot to me… I know it must be really strange to just have a cousin all of a sudden when it’s just been you and Wayne for so long, but I think it’ll be nice for us to get to know each other too.” 

He nods, “yeah, its no problem, really.”

“Don't let it become a problem,” she whispers, keeping her voice down so it doesn’t get to Wayne. “If you have any issue with me at all, ever, just let me know. Please? You’re special to my dad and I want to have a good relationship with you too.” 

He lets his walls down then, he sighs and nods, “okay… yeah, I’m a bit worried that I’ll lose him now that you’re here but I can see you’re pretty cool and normal so—

“You absolutely don’t have to worry,” Roxy assures him. “I’m not taking him from you, I just want to experience what it’s like to have a dad.” 

“And who the hell am I to get in the way of that?” Eddie manages to laugh. 

She opens her arms and looks at him cautiously as she moves in closer, “are you a hugger?” 

“Yeah,” he smiles, opening his arms in return and taking her in for a quick hug. She’s about as tall as he is, she rests her chin on his shoulder and holds him tight. 

“I always wanted a brother, too…” she says as she pulls back. 

“A sister sounds nice,” he teases. “Just don’t move in and don’t touch my things and we’ll be fine.” 

“Deal.” 

—

“You know, I’m actually really excited to meet her,” Steve admits to Robin as they’re locking up. He lets her outside first and pulls the door closed to lock it. 

“Why? ‘Cause she’s the only girl in Hawkins who doesn’t know you’re a total loser?” Robin teases, waiting at his passenger door for him to unlock it.

“They don’t think that. Only you do and I don’t really think your opinion matches the vast majority of women in this town...” he fights back, rushing to his car to get it because it’s fucking cold out and it only makes him meaner when he’s cold.

He hops in and reaches over to her door to unlock it and push it open from the inside. She hops in and throws her bag in the back. “Mm, well, I like to think I know women better than you do,” she reminds him.

“Whatever,” he grumbles, starting his beamer with a sigh. “But no, it’s not cause she’s new, it’s cause she’s probably a lot like Eddie… and you know, I always thought if Eddie was a girl then I’d date her… or if I was a girl then it would work better cause he wouldn't have to change.” 

She stares at him like he’s a complete idiot, “what?”

“You know, if you were a boy there’s a girl you’d want to marry?”

“Steve, I don’t have to be a boy to like girls, you know that?” She says it slowly so that he understands her. “You don’t have to like girls just cause you’re a boy…” 

“I know, but I like girls?” He reminds her, “very much I might add…” 

“I wish you wouldn’t,” she really doesn’t want to hear about all the things he’s gotten to do with pretty girls that she still hasn’t. It’s not fair. “But what I’m saying is, you could like boys at the same time. That’s very much allowed.” 

“I don’t think I do,” he purses his lips and shakes his head, making it convincing that he’s thought about it before and he has thought about it. A lot.

He does like men. Just one man in particular piques his interest right now. But he shouldn’t, Harringtons aren’t gay. So he says he doesn’t. Cause he can’t.

“Okay,” she drops it, “whatever you say.”

“Do you think I’m gay?” He looks at her with so much panic, just idling in the parking lot, he’s not moving until he gets an answer. And one that he likes. 

She shakes her head, “no. I think you have a crush on Eddie…”

Steve can’t say that she’s wrong so he doesn’t say anything at all. He accepts her answer and nods, “interesting.” 

He puts his car in reverse, places his hand behind Robin's headrest and looks behind them, peeling out of the parking lot as quickly as possible. He’s quick to leave downtown, Robin is quiet the whole time, just smirking away cause she knows she’s right and she knows it’s silent in the car right now because Steve is thinking about how she’s right. 

“So what if I did?” Steve asks, almost whispering he’s so scared of the words that leave his mouth. “What if I did have a crush on Eddie?” 

“Ask him out? It’s really a no-brainer, here, Steve.” 

He looks at her and then back to the road a few times, mouth agape and then his voice picks right back up. In that octave, he only uses when he’s stressed out, “really? Thats it? You’re not going to do a deep dive into my brain and find out why I’m crushing on a dude of all fucking people?” 

“Sounds like you’re asking yourself enough questions for the both of us inside that big head of yours,” she teases. 

He shakes his head with a sigh. “If I tell you the truth are you going to make fun of me?” 

“Probably,” she’s honest. 

He sighs again, more exaggerated this time. “When we were walking through the upside down, going to Nancy’s, Eddie gave me this speech about how Nancy ran after me so fast so she must be in love with me but… but what he didn’t know is that I also wanted to run the first time. I almost didn’t go back to help Nancy with the Demogorgon but I did because I loved her and—and he came back in for me when he didn’t have to. You two already came down, I would’ve been fine with you guys. He didn’t need to come down but he did.” 

Robin just smiles, “do you want him to love you?” 

Steve shrugs, “I don’t know… but I remember staring at him and feeling like I wanted to kiss him and then the earthquake happened and you started screaming for Nancy.” 

“Yeah it was action-packed down there,” she remembers all too well. “And you know, I think he wanted to kiss you too, especially when he was hot wiring the RV, you know, when he called you ‘big boy’?” 

He sucks in a deep breath and nods, “yeah… I remember.” 

“So you should kiss him,” Robin suggests again. 

“No,” Steve panics a bit. “No. What if I’m just getting confused again like when I thought I was in love with you? I can’t kiss him and ruin everything?” 

“I’m sure you won’t… Eddie isn’t straight, there’s no way,” Robin waves her hands out and then smacks then over her knees. “No way.” 

“But we don’t know that, do we?” 

Robin stares at him. “Really? Really?”

“What?” 

“I said the same thing about Vickie and you kept yelling boobies at me!” 

“I was right, wasn’t I?” Steve combats, not realizing that it proves her point. 

“Which means I’m right, right now! Eddie likes you back!” Robin shouts, “come on, man, you have to know that by now! I literally walked out to find you guys hugging in the middle of the store today? You have sleepovers and share secrets, he’s just as close to you as I am and he actually wants to kiss you, so kiss him!” 

“I can’t!” Steve shouts back. “I can’t ruin this and I ruin everything when I date people. I’m not dating him. Look at us! You never dated me and now you’re my best friend in the whole world, I dated Nancy and she felt trapped and lost and sad for a year and I never noticed until it was too late.” 

“It wasn’t your fault, you know that,” Robin reminds him. “She was balls deep in her trauma, it was almost a year since her friend died while she was busy sleeping with you and never heard her screaming for help. Thats a hard thing to grapple with but she did love you. You did help her through it, she told me how much it meant to her that you’d go over and cuddle with her all night when she was missing barb and how you went to Barb's parents house for dinner all year when you didn’t need to. You helped her dad around the house and even went to Mrs. Hollands' house for tea on your own… you were a good boyfriend it just wasn’t meant to be and that’s okay.” 

“But what if the same is for Eddie? What if it’s just a huge crush and not meant to be and everything changes?” Steve worries. “I love the way things are. If he knew I was crushing on him then everything would change and I don’t want anything to change again.” 

“News flash, dingus, but Eddie’s long lost cousin showing up out of nowhere is going to change things,” Robin points out. 

He groans as he pulls into her driveway, “I know… can we just drop it? Okay?” He places the car in park and takes his keys out of the ignition. “I’m not ready for things to change a lot again.” 

“Okay,” Robin drops it and heads out of the car. “But if Roxy’s anything like Eddie, I’m guessing she’s going to want a date with me before you.” 

“Doubt it,” Steve laughs, following her inside. 

—

Eddie brings Roxy to the Byer's place a few minutes before the party normally starts. Joyce loves her right away, she fluffs her hair and says “oh, how I’d kill for locks like this.” 

Only for Hopper to reply, “you did back in 64.”

She sighs and pats Roxy’s shoulder, “enjoy being young.” 

She laughs, “I will now that I might make friends… I never really had any back in Chicago.”

“My boys are really sweet, I’m sure you’ll get along with them real well,” Joyce assures her. “If you like video games and George Lucas movies then you’ll fit right in.” 

“I do,” she brightens right up. “I thought they sounded interesting just from their pizza orders, now I know I’m surrounded by other dorks, this is the best  day ever.” 

She makes Hop laugh from his recliner in the living room, “and we’ve got sports going in here if you get tired of it at any point.” 

“Only Steve and Lucas ever take him up on that,” Joyce teases. “He’s dying for more sports fans.” 

“I mean, I was on the girls curling team in Chicago…” 

“Curling?” Eddie repeats, “like the one where you play shuffleboard on ice?” 

She nods, “yeah and I was really good at it. My team was the regional champion.” She wanders into the living room after that and sits on the couch beside Hopper, “what teams do you like?” 

Eddie listens in for a second but then he heads more into the kitchen, Argyle is already home with the pizzas, he’s just making a salad to go with it all. Jonathan was on pickup duty, using Argyle's van so they all had a place to sit. El was at Mike's, Will’s down the hall in his room… the house is pretty quiet right now. It wouldn’t be for long. 

He stands at the counter beside argyle, “hey…” 

“Hey,” argyle gives him a smile. “What’s got you so glum, my dude?” 

He shrugs, “it’s been a weird day.” 

“Meeting your long-lost twin’ll do that,” Argyle teases. “Seriously, are you sure Wayne isn’t your dad too? You’re like identical.” 

Eddie manages to laugh, “yeah, I don’t think so unless Wayne’s taking it to the grave, I’m pretty sure his asshole brother is my father… but yeah, I see it too.” 

“I’d love to meet my own doppelgänger,” Argyle says with excitement. “It would be cool to see someone, specifically a girl someone, who looked just like me and now you’ve got that! It’s sick.” 

“If you think so,” Eddie huffs, resting his chin in his hand and leaning against the counter. “She’s a prettier, shinier version of me… everyone's gonna end up loving her more and I’m going to be alone again.” 

Argyle puts the salad tongs down and places his hand on Eddie’s shoulder instead, “it won’t be like that, man, I promise. You’re very special. What would we do without your songs and your jokes and the way you make everyone smile? Sure, she’s nice to look at but you’re you and that’s why we love you.” 

He gives argyle a side hug, “thanks, man, really. That’s very kind of you to say.” 

“Meant every word,” Argyle smiles. 

Just then the front door opens again and Steve’s familiar, “heey!!” Rings through the house. Both Eddie and Argyle head out to see him and Robin, entering the main room of the house and they see Steve’s jaw drop as he looks at Roxy for the first time. He goes right into Casanova mode, runs his fingers through his hair before he extends his hand to her and smiles, “hi, I’m Steve…” 

“Roxy,” she shakes his hand firmly and smiles back. “Nice to meet you… and you,” she turns to Robin and freezes, the same look that was on Steve’s face is now on Roxy’s as she looks at Robin. “Hi?” 

Robin smiles back, “so you’re the lookalike I’ve heard so much about.” 

“What?” Roxy doesn’t understand. 

“You and Eddie, you’re like twins,” She laughs, “although you are much prettier….” 

Roxy blushes and laughs, she tucks her hair behind her ear and stutters on her words, “th-thanks… thank you.”

“No problem,” Robin gives her one last smile and then keeps walking inside. “Is dinner ready? I’m starving!”

“Sure is! follow me,” Argyle leads her back into the kitchen and Roxy follows quickly behind her. 

Leaving Steve to walk up to Eddie and wrap his arm around him, “you okay?” 

Eddie nods, “yep. Just peachy.” 

They grab their plates and load them up with pizza and dipping sauces and salad, they have beers and sodas and chips for later when they’re hungry again. It’s the same every week, Joyce and Argyle will do anything to make sure the party is happy and fed and has a good time… they’re the best moms the party could ask for. 

In the basement, there are 4 mismatched couches and an array of other seats. Beanbags, a hanging chair thats secured to one of the log beams in the ceiling and a single plastic lawn chair… getting enough seats for everyone was hard. And now there’s 1 more person in their group.

Robin and Roxy take a seat next to each other, already getting to know each other, it makes Eddie relax a bit as he sits beside Steve. There’s a ruckus above them, meaning the kids have arrived with Jonathan and Nancy, and the party was about to really start. 

Steve can’t stop looking at Eddie, “are you sure you’re okay?” 

He just nods, “yeah… I just want to eat and say hi to everyone and then go home.” 

“Oh,” Steve's face drops. “Are you still feeling anxious? Do you want a hug?” 

He looks over to Roxy and Robin, talking just loud enough to be heard by one another and fully absorbed in another world together. Eddie puts his plate down on the coffee table and Steve copies him, opening his arms and letting Eddie in for a quick hug, “you can always talk to me.” 

Eddie pulls back a bit too quickly, looking over to Roxy again who didn’t see anything. She was already asking about Steve earlier, she already knew Steve was important to Eddie just by the tone of his voice… Steve’s so, so important to him. He just stares at Steve and it all comes tumbling out, ���she lives in the apartments I grew up in… she’s living where my mom died, Steve.” 

“Oh,” Steve knows the stories. All of them. They’ve spent many a night awake in Eddie’s trailer, staring up at the ceiling with their shoulders pressed together… sharing a blanket and holding hands while they shared every secret they had. Well, all but one. 

“Do you want me to drive her home for you? I can tell her to only call me for rides and shit, you don’t need to go through that—” 

“You don’t have to,” Eddie panics more thinking about Roxy and Steve spending a bunch of alone time together too. “Really, don’t. I can do it.” 

“But if it's going to bring back your memories then you don’t have to, I’m okay bringing her home, Robin won’t mind… clearly,” he references over to them. “I haven’t seen her flirt like that before?” 

“She took a page from your book,” Eddie teases, bumping Steve’s shoulder with his own. 

“Yeah, and she knew I wanted to ask her out too…” 

“What?” Eddie’s heart breaks right then and there. 

“If it’s okay? I just… I thought maybe it would be nice cause she’s new and she doesn’t know me and—

“She has no preconceived notions about you,” Eddie finishes his sentence. “No, I get it. It’s fine.” 

It’s not. It’s really fucking not. Because here Eddie was loving every single part of Steve, every story and mistake, every fear and dream and freckle and hair on his stupid fucking head. But, of course, Steve wants something different. He wants to butter her up and embellish the truth about himself and go back to being King Steve… The lover boy of the land, he could have his pick but he still wants something shiny and new and he definitely doesn’t want Eddie back. 

He stands up then, “I uh, I forgot some napkins, I’ll be back.” 

“Okay…” 

Steve watches him leave, taking the steps 2 at a time until he’s back upstairs. He turns down the hallway and heads towards the bedrooms and the bathrooms where he bumps right into Will. He’s already crying, his face is red from trying to hold it in until he gets to the bathroom but he can't. He chokes on a sob as he pushes past Will and into the bathroom.

“Hey, hey, Eddie, what’s wrong?” Will follows him right into the bathroom, shutting the door behind them. “What’s wrong? Is it a memory? A flashback? What is it?” 

Eddie just wraps him up in a hug and cries, “it’s Steve…” 

“Oh,” Will settles and holds him gently, running his hand over eddies back. “I know…” 

Will knows better than anyone in the house, hell better than anyone in the whole town, what it’s like to be in love with your sisters boyfriend. Its the exact reason why Eddie let Will follow him and why he’s able to tell him the truth. “He wants to ask out Roxy.”

“Who?” Will asks, not caught up on everything cause he’s been in his room all day. 

Eddie sighs and pulls back, wiping the tears off his cheeks and taking another deep breath. He leans against the sink, “my uncle has a daughter and she showed up today. Her name is Roxy and she’s pretty and a girl and of course Steve wants to date her.” 

“Boys are so stupid,” Will just shakes his head. “I was rooting for Steve, too… I thought he’d figure out that he’s in love with you but he’s still being so stupid about it.” 

“He’s worse than Mike,” Eddie manages to tease him, bringing a smile back to his own face. 

Will just nods along, “I literally confessed all my feelings to him… well, I was pretending that it was what El thought about him and the idiot didn’t see through me at all. He just nodded along and was like ‘oh yeah? Huh, I guess she does always need me’ like no idiot! I do!”

“I ran through a swarm of killer bats for him… I would’ve died so he could make it back to Dustin and he still wants my cousin more than me,” Eddie shares. “I thought we were building something here, I thought he was going to figure it out that what we have is more than just friends… friends don’t sleep in the same bed and share hugs and I know for a fact he kissed my shoulder one night. I didn’t dream that. So why the fuck is he going after my cousin?” 

“Does she look like you?” 

Eddie nods, “like exactly the same just with tits.” 

Will looks at him with a tilt of his head, “oh, Steve’s so dumb… he’s definitely in love with you and thinking this is his chance to be normal if he can just date the girl version of you.”

“You think?” 

Will nods, “absolutely… I remember when Steve was dating Nancy she looked so much like Tommy H. they had the same curly hair and freckles but Nancy is a girl, she’s the safe option and then he fell in love with her.” 

“How do you know that?” Eddie’s shocked, for a kid 4 years younger than Harrington, he sure knew the drama. 

“Jonathan had no friends before Nancy and Argyle so he would tell me everything and we gossiped a lot… he would hear crazy shit while smoking the weed you sold him under the bleachers and then he’d come home and tell me. Like, this one time, Carole was saying that Tommy wanted a threesome with Billy, but before he wanted one with Steve but Steve was never interested and it always made Tommy really angry and then a few weeks later they broke up and she said ‘I wouldn’t be surprised if he asks Wheeler and the perv for a threesome next.’ So…” 

“Holy shit,” Eddie’s jaw drops and he chuckles slightly, “they weren’t kidding when they called you Will the Wise.” 

He shakes his head with a smile, “they weren’t… I get it from my mom.” 

“That you do,” Eddie smiles, knowing from Steve that Joyce and Nancy’s knowledge, in the beginning, is the reason they won in the end. “It’s just hard waiting for him to get his head out of his ass… even the thing with your brother was so homosexually charged.” 

“What happened with my brother?” 

“Did Jonathan leave out the part where he kicked the shit out of Steve so bad he had a concussion?” 

“I knew he threw a punch…” Will says, thinking back on it. He was only 13 when he went missing, of course, Jonathan held back on some stuff from that week.

“Oh, no, he kicked his ass,” Eddie smiles but feels bad about it. “Tommy painted Nancy the slut Wheeler on the theatre's matinee and they got in a verbal fight in the alleyway and Jonathan took the first swing and he finished it before the cops rolled in and took Jonathan away.” 

“Oh…” 

“It was a rough week, Steve egged him on, he deserved it,” Eddie can’t help but side with Jonathan after knowing the whole truth. Including what Steve called Will; it’s something he’s also not going to tell Will about. Everyone wanted to spare Will the hurt of knowing the names he’s been called behind his back. 

“Huh,” Will thinks about it a little harder. “Sounds like Steve uses violence to get close to men… didn’t you pin him to a wall and hold a bottle to his throat? Or did Dustin exaggerate that?” 

Eddie nods, “oh, yeah, I did that…” he presses his lips together awkwardly, it was a very intense, very hot, moment between them. He thinks about it often. 

“Maybe you need to have a fight,” Will suggests. “Not, like, physical, but get your feelings out, raise your voice, get in his face and wait for him to kiss you.” 

Eddie laughs again, “okay, alright… that’s not a bad idea?” 

“He just needs a push.” 

“What about Mike? You’re not actively trying to push him and El apart, are you?” 

He shakes his head, “no, no, I’d never do that to her. I love her, she’s my sister… I’m actually trying to get over Mike. I’ll just be single until I meet another gay person my age and then I’ll see where it goes.” 

“I know someone,” Eddie proposes. “You know him too… if you’re okay with me telling him about you, maybe he’d want to ask you out?” 

“Really?” Will lights right up. “And they’re 16?” 

“He’s 17…” Eddie says, not wanting to give away that it’s Gareth. He hasn’t told any of the new Hellfire members, only the band knows. 

“Yeah, no, I’d love that,” Will brightens right up. “That would be great.” 

“I’ll work on that for you,” he pats Will on the shoulder, “now come on, it’s gonna be weird if they see us leaving together.” 

“Here,” Will opens the cupboard behind the sink and grabs a bandaid, “I was just showing you where these are.” 

“Smart… and thanks, sorry for breaking down on you, it’s been a weird fuckin day,” Eddie sighs and heads for the door. “I never normally cry.”  

“No problem, it’s our secret,” Will really doesn’t mind, he follows Eddie out into the hall and then back into the kitchen unseen. 

Eddie pats his shoulder one more time before slipping past him and heading back downstairs to his dinner. His spot beside Steve is still empty, the kids are meeting Roxy and asking her all about how she found Eddie and Wayne after so many years. 

“Well, his name being in the news for murder was a big help… I always knew my dad’s name but I had no idea how to track down all the Wayne Munsons who went to some random festival in the mid-60s,” Roxy shares. “But Wayne told me it wasn’t Eddie at all, it was actually the lab here in town and a bunch of kids died? What the heck happened?” 

They all look at each other and shrug, playing it off that they had no idea. Dustin says they have no clue what the details are, “we’re just glad he got off the hook 'cause we would’ve been charged with harbouring a wanted criminal if not…” 

“And what a great job you did at that,” Eddie teases. “At least in jail I’d get clean clothes and 3 meals a day…” 

“We can find something to send you to jail if thats where you want to be,” Steve teases him, reaching out for his hand to tug him back down to the sofa. “Your pizza is getting cold…”  

“You wanna warm it up for me, hot stuff?” Eddie whispers, getting in his space and making Steve blush. 

He pushes Eddie back, “shut up.” 

“Make me…” 

Steve picks up Eddie’s slice of pizza and brings it to his mouth, all but shoving the slice in there, forcing him to take a bite. “there.” 

Eddie takes a big bite and Steve pulls the rest of the slice away, putting it back on the plate. Eddie watches him intently, he’s so madly in love it makes his stomach turn and flutter up to his throat. He was to look away or he’ll choke on the bite, he places his hand on his chest after, it took a lot to do that without coughing to death in front of him, and Steve noticed too. 

He placed his hand on Eddie’s back and patted him a few times like a newborn baby, “you good?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” he waves it off, slightly embarrassed. 

Steve keeps his hand on Eddie’s back and gently runs his hand up toward his shoulder, he gives him a good squeeze and pulls him into a side hug. Eddie tilts his head toward him and Steve does the same, the bump noggins and smile before turning back to everyone else. 

—

The kids usually sleep over in Will’s basement after their pizza parties, sometimes Eddie brings Max home but tonight she’s staying with El. Robin and Roxy are having a blast talking to each other and now Steve has slid into the spot beside her on the couch with his arm around the back of the couch, basically around her. 

“I’m going to head out,” Eddie announces, pointing towards the door. “Rox did you want to drive home with Steve? He goes past your apartment anyway.” 

“Yeah, I don’t mind,” Steve throws in for good measure, “it would be nice to talk to you, I haven’t been able to get a word in edge wise with Robin here.” 

“I would love that,” Roxy gives Steve a smile. “Uh, I’ll see you tomorrow though? Wayne invited me for dinner cause he has the night off.” 

“Right,” Eddie clearly had no idea. Steve could see it in his face. “Have a good night… see you guys.” 

Everyone cheers goodbye and he gets a few waves before he heads towards the stairs and starts his journey home. Alone. For the first Friday night in a long time.

“I think I’m going to go with him,” Robin announces, “it was lovely to meet you but I don’t want him to leave without me…”

“Oh, okay, bye Robin!” Roxy waves her off and then it’s just her and Steve and a bunch of children. “I guess we shouldn’t stay too much longer, that would be weird…” 

“We can go whenever you like?” Steve leaves it completely up to her. 

“Let’s go,” she stands up and reaches out a hand to help him to his feet as well. 

Steve takes it with a smile, she was just as chivalrous as Eddie… he says goodbye to the kids, Dustin pats his shoulder during their goodbye hug and whispers in his ear, “good luck, she’s cool.” 

“Thanks,” he mumbles back, “call me tomorrow if you need a ride home.” 

“Will do,” Dustin says, giving Steve and Roxy a smile and a wave. “Drive safe.” 

“it was so nice to meet you guys,” Roxy says one last time, “thank you for letting me come.” 

“Anytime,” a few of the boys say. “Come back next week,” Dustin adds. 

Lucas agrees too, “Yeah, and Max said she loved having another girl at the party now. She wanted me to say bye if she wasn’t down here when you leave, so, Bye from Max…” 

“Tell her in the morning I loved meeting her too,” Roxy gives them all a smile and one last wave, “see ya!” 

They wave her off and she follows Steve up the stairs, they put their shoes back on by the door and Steve hands her the leather jacket on the hook, expecting it to be hers. “Thanks,” she smiles. “Am I that obvious?” 

“You’re just a lot like Eddie,” he admits. 

“Which is crazy, honestly, no one at my high school was like me and now I come here and we’re like twins?” She says with a laugh, feeling a bit too loud as she looks over into the living room where Joyce and Hop are cuddling on the couch. “Oh, sorry… thank you for having me tonight, you guys have a lovely family.” 

“Oh, anytime sweetheart,” Joyce gives her a sweet smile. 

“You be careful on the road,” Hopper points to Steve, “the news is saying there’s a fog rolling in tonight so no dilly-dallying.” 

“Sure thing, dad,” Steve rolls his eyes as he opens the front door. “See you later.” 

“Bye guys,” Joyce calls back to them as they leave. 

Steve leads her outside towards his car and unlocks her passenger door, opening it for her. “Why thank you, kind sir,” she pats Steve on the shoulder and then gets into the seat. Steve closes the door behind her and rushes over to the driver's side.

“So, Eddie said you’re in the apartments above the shops?” Steve double-checks as he starts the engine. 

She nods, “yeah, it’s not much but I wanted a place close to my dad, even if he didn’t want me I still wanted to live here and get to know him.” 

“Wayne would never not want you,” Steve assures, “believe me, from what I know about Eddie’s childhood, Wayne is meant to be a dad and take care of people, he loves everyone in Eddie’s life just as much, too.” 

She smiles, “yeah, he talked very highly of Eddie… I’m still waiting for him to warm up to me.” 

“He’s kinda stuck in the mindset that the love people give him is conditional, he’s afraid Wayne will leave him for you,” Steve spills the beans. “Don’t tell him I told you, but, just keep in mind that Wayne has been his whole world for the last like 9 years of his life and he’s been through so much this year that he needs that one aspect of his life to stay the same… he can’t lose Wayne.” 

“I don’t plan on taking him,” she reiterates. “I really don’t, I just want to talk to him and celebrate a birthday with him and give him a fathers day present and hear that he’s proud of me… I want to feel like I’m part of a family that loves me for me.” 

“I get that,” Steve really gets it, actually. He lets everything go quiet while he backs out of the Byers driveway and heads towards downtown. “I uh… I’ve always known both my parents but I didn’t feel like I had a family before when it was just me and them.” 

“Don’t get me wrong, I love my mom and my grandparents but… they don’t get me,” she has to explain for good measure. “They weren’t abusive or anything it just wasn’t fun being there for the last 18 years.” 

“Well, you’re here now and there’s lots of love in our little friend group to go around, so,” Steve gives her a smile. “Speaking of… if you ever wanted to hang out just like, me and you, without the rest of them, that would be nice… don’t you think?” 

“Yeah,” she lights right up too. “I’m having dinner with Wayne tomorrow but I’m free the next night?” 

“Sounds good,” Steve can’t stop the smile on his face. “I uh, I work till 5 but I can get you at 6?” 

“That works for me,” she smiles right back. “You’ll have to pick the spot, I don’t know what’s around here.” 

“There isn’t much, but Benny’s diner reopened last month so if you like diner food…” 

“I have been dying for a good old diner burger,” she assures him. “This’ll be fun, I’ve never had good friends like this.” 

“It’s life-changing, believe me.” 

—

“and then he asked to ask her out?!” Eddie freaks out more towards the end of his story, parked in front of Robin's house while she listens to his ramble. 

Robin just sighs and leans back against the seat. “I never told you he was smart.” 

“This is killing me, Rob,” he turns to her with tears in his eyes. “She gets to call Wayne her dad, she gets to date Steve, everyone loved her as soon as she walked into the room… it took me years to get this and she got it all in 10 fucking seconds?” 

“I don’t know how to comfort you,” Robin admits. “On one hand I know this is just your anxiety about things changing again but on the other hand… I like her so I’m part of the problem.” 

“I don’t want people to not like her,” Eddie says with a sigh, he rubs his face quickly and groans from deep inside himself. “I’m overreacting, I know that, but it hurts. It physically fucking hurts that I have to share her with MY people. Wayne and Steve are my people.” 

“Okay, watch yourself,” she gets jealous then. “But Steve does love you, I know that, but he loves me too and he loves Dustin and he loves Max and Lucas and Erika… I’m not sure how he is with Mike honestly, it’s a toss-up, but he loves everyone. He has the room to love people. He’s been waiting to love people like this his whole life.” 

“I know…” 

“Do you?” Robin questions, staring him down. “Steve loves you so much he let me and Nancy kill vecna alone so he could stay with you two. And thank fucking god he did because I wouldn’t be able to deal with him if he lost you that day, you were being an idiot thinking you could take on those bats alone.” 

“He stayed for Dustin…?” 

Robin shakes her head, “No. He knows that Dustin knows how to follow orders and make it out fine. He stayed for you.”

A tear tumbles down his cheek and he’s quick to wipe it away with the back of his hand. “I just wanted to win.” 

“And we did,” robin reaches out and takes his hand in hers. “We won, Vecna died, the gates are closed and Hop came back to clear your good name. That’s the biggest win we could’ve ever expected…” 

“Is it really a win if it brought her here?” Eddie asks, feeling a bit terrible for how much he regrets opening the door for her. 

Robin nods, a smirk growing on her face, “what if she’s more like you than you thought?” 

“Hm?” His brows go up. “No way…” 

“You’re gay, Wayne has that thing with Mr. Clarke that no one wants to talk about… but I see it. I know there’s something fruity going on there, she’s gotta be like us,” Robin rants. 

“What thing with Mr. Clarke?” 

“Has Steve not told you?” Robin gawks, jaw dropped, “no… really?” 

“Clearly, I have no idea what you’re talking about?” 

“Mr. Clarke comes in and gets a movie every Saturday morning and Wayne drops the same VHS tape off Sunday before he goes to work… he brings it right to the desk too like I didn’t check it out to Scott the day before?” She explains. “Like, really…? it’s so clear they’re having dates on Wayne’s only day off.” 

“I’m learning way too much today,” Eddie rubs his eyes, shaking his head. “Holy fuck? Why didn’t he tell me?” 

“Dustin said their cots were side by side in the gym after the earthquake, he found them talking when you got arrested,” Robin keeps explaining, hoping she’s making it somewhat better the more he knows. “I think it’s either a trauma bond friendship or they’re dating. It’s been 3 months.” 

“I’m normally with Steve on Saturdays,” he whispers, realizing why he hasn’t noticed this… it’s cause he’s not home as often as he used to be. “Oh my god, I’m such an ass… here I am scared that I’m going to lose him when I’ve barely talked to him in the last 3 months?” 

“So maybe Roxy showing up is a good thing, maybe she’s meant to bring everyone together?” She suggests, eyes full of hope. And maybe she’s right… Robin typically is. 

“Okay,” he gives in. “I’ll give her a chance.”

General Taglist 

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Steddie

@nosaladallowed-ao3  @wifeyreid @girl-with-an-orange-cat @sunshinemunchkin @luna-munson83 @manda-panda-monium @steve-thehair-mamabear 

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#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #steve harrington fanfiction #eddie munson fanfiction #stranger things fanfiction #steddie fanfiction

[schrijverr]

I Found Myself a Cheerleader 15

Chapter 15 out of 28

Bumped to the lowest step on the social ladder after his fight with Billy, Steve gets roped in with the cheer team. What starts as a favor to help them out when one member breaks her leg in turn for protection from the brunt of the bullying, sets the universe on a different path.

In this chapter, everyone’s life seems to be going in the wrong direction as Vecna rolls into town as they all seem to distance themselves from one another. Meanwhile, Robin has developed a crush on a certain cheerleader and it isn’t Steve.

On AO3.

Ships: steddie & buckingham

Warnings: internalized homophobia, homophobia mention, f-slur, bullying mention, HIV/AIDS crisis mention, racism mention, eating disorder mention

~~~~~~~

Chapter 15: The Arrival of Vecna

After new years, Steve feels like his life has been spiraling further and further out of control. Yet he cannot do anything, but stay. He can only watch and cling on as the roller coaster continues in a way that seems safe enough, but also like it can fall apart at any moment.

It’s just been a compilation of things, honestly. It feels like his fight with Eddie was a turning point and now, in a horrible domino effect, it is all getting worse from there.

Insecurity has been creeping up on him with the words of his father in that stupid clothing boutique and the fight with Eddie that came afterwards. Eddie, who is still ignoring him. Neither of them have said a word to the other since then.

He still feels conflicted about it. He hates what he did to Eddie and he wants to tell him how he didn’t mean it, but Eddie has taken to staying behind and sending the kids ahead, so he won’t have to see Steve’s face.

Steve has stopped getting out of the car. Just watches the school entrance in case he catches a flash of curly hair that he adores so much. His heart aches to make it right, to have dimples and chocolate eyes back in his life. Another part of him thinks it might be easier to be rejected, left in the dust. To be hurt, so he can get over it. To find love elsewhere.

Chrissy fake breaks up with him two weeks into the new year. Ever since then, he has been throwing himself at every girl that has come into Family Video in an attempt to cover up for all the emotions he’s feeling, but can’t put into words.

A few girls have actually taken him up on his offer and Steve has gone through with it, because he doesn’t think a straight boy in his position would refuse. It hasn’t been the most comfortable, but nothing he hasn’t done before and it’s just a task to get through.

Chrissy and Robin both have expressed concern about his behavior, but Steve will not listen to them.

The two have been hanging out quite a bit, since they’re stuck in school together and Steve is glad they’re getting along, but it’s annoying that they now team up together. It can be quite funny when they’re just ribbing each other, but more recently they’re being concerned together, which makes Steve want to walk into the forest never to be seen again. He doesn’t know why.

Right now is such a moment, where he can feel their eyes on his back as he leads a girl through the store, putting on his charm.

Steve is pretty sure she has a boyfriend, so hopefully this won’t end in another disastrous date. And for now he tries to feel validated by how she giggles and twirls her hair. No one will question him if he goes on like this. Next time, there will be more evidence needed than a few slurs, a picture in the year book, or the fact he isn’t married yet. Next time, he’ll be safer.

It’s for the best, so he ignores the stares of Chrissy and Robin as he flirts with the girl, whose name he does not know, pretending to be disappointed but understanding when she tells him about her boyfriend.

He rings her up, having to bump Robin out of the way, before watching her go with smile in place that he drops with a sigh once she’s out the door. Robin takes the moment to pipe up: “You don’t have to keep doing that, you know that, right?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he grits, playing dumb, because he isn’t in the mood for a lecture. He already feels uncomfortable enough in his own skin.

“We’re just worried, Stevie,” Chrissy says with those big eyes of her that Steve has always been a little weak for and she knows it.

Steve sends her a glare and scowls: “Nothing to worry about.”

“Dingus,” Robin huffs, a little annoyed by how he’s avoiding the topic. It hasn’t become a thing yet, Steve could never not show up when she needs him or vise versa, but he knows how much she hates that he’s shutting her out.

And he does feel guilty about it. Her remembers how she once confessed to him how everyone always seems to leave her behind. In the darkness of the night, Steve had promised he never would, but now he’s pushing her away.

The guilt eats at him and he doesn’t want to do a repeat of his behavior of when he fought with Eddie. He doesn’t want to fuck up like that again. So, he takes a deep breath and pleads: “I know, okay, I know. Please, just- just drop it, okay?”

It is the closest he has come to acknowledging it and Chrissy and Robin both share a look before looking back. Robin reacts first, she takes his hand and gives him a crooked smile: “Alright, dingus, okay.”

“We’re here if you want to talk,” Chrissy offers, also smiling.

Steve does not know what he did to deserve friends like this, but he feels incredibly fortunate. He smiles back and softly says: “Thanks.”

He wants to move on from the topic now, but he doesn’t know how. Luckily, Robin can practically read his mind, so she turns to Chrissy and says: “Hey, Chris, how is cheer going? Band is already practicing for the prep rally, you guys too?”

Chrissy lights up and excitedly starts talking about the new routine they’ve been working on. On another day, Steve would immediately get sucked into the topic, however, today he takes a second to recover before going to dive in.

Because he’s taking that moment, he suddenly notices how Robin is looking at Chrissy. Chrissy is smiling brightly as she talks about cheer and Robin is watching her, only following along, because she’s friends with two cheerleaders, thus has learned too much through osmosis, partially against her will. However, she doesn’t seem to mind, she’s smiling along, a little blush covering her freckles, as she stares at Chrissy.

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

Robin has a crush on Chrissy. It just hits him as he watches her. He hasn’t heard her about Vickie for a while, but he hadn’t realized that was because she likes someone else. Because she likes Chrissy.

He isn’t subtle about his realization either. Well, he is, but not for Robin. He is still holding her hand and squeezes it in surprise when he notices, looking between the two.

She looks at him when he squeezes and sees him glancing between them. Her eyes grow wide and he can see in her eyes that if he even thinks about uttering about saying anything while Chrissy is still in a 1 mile radius of Family Video, she is going to murder him.

Steve knows the feeling, so he quickly nods to let her know he gets it, before jumping into cheer, so that Chrissy won’t notice the hiccup.

Of course he had noticed the two getting closer and retrospectively the first time Robin saw Chrissy was pretty gay with how she spluttered and was rendered quite speechless, but he never really thought about it like that. A part of him still can’t fully fathom that anyone would be attracted to either of them, even if they are objectively attractive.

However, he manages to keep being normal until Chrissy has to go home. She hugs Steve first and he squeezes her back, before he watches her hug Robin, who seemingly explodes. He hadn’t know she could blush like that and has to bite his lip not giggle at her.

Though Steve has to admit, Robin is not the worst, not like he’s seen her with other girls she has liked. She isn’t tripping over herself rambling, instead just does an awkward smile and doesn’t really hug back, as she splutters a goodbye.

They both wave as Chrissy leaves and Steve drops it the moment, she gets into the car and he turns to Robin. Robin, who is blushing and not meeting his eyes. A shit eating grin creeps up on his face and he leans against the counter next to Robin as he drawls: “So… Chrissy.”

“Oh shut up,” she squeaks, pushing him away without looking.

Steve pouts and comes right back into her space and whines: “Oh come on, you bullied me about Eddie, I told you everything. You can’t just leave me hanging like this.”

Now Robin looks at him and she doesn’t look like Robin at all. Steve stops and looks at her, frowning as he takes in how she is hunched over, bites her lip anxiously, plays with her fingers, loosing the liveliness he loves about her. Gently he asks: “Hey, you okay?”

“You’re not mad about my crush on Chrissy?” she asks in a small voice that he hates on her. He likes how she cackles and rambles, not this.

“Of course I’m not mad,” he tells her. “Why would I be mad that you like her? She is super nice and a cool girl. Was inevitable, honestly.”

“It was not,” Robin scoffs, before she asks: “Isn’t it, like, against bro code to like someone’s friend?”

“Robin, you are also Chrissy’s friend,” Steve points out.

She has the audacity to look surprised by that statement and to then ask: “I am?”

“Yeah, Robs, you are,” Steve says, unsure how she can’t know that. “You two are always hanging out together, you eat lunch together. She asks me how you’ve been when you have to work while we hang out, because I’ve seen you last.”

“Oh, I thought she only did that to me, because you’re friends and I’m just also always there,” Robin says, scratching the back of her head.

“Gods, I love you, but you’re also an idiot,” Steve informs her.

“Hey, I take offense to that,” Robin pouts, but she is also grinning, which is a win.

“You can be offended later, tell me about your crush now,” Steve demands. “You finally developed taste, I have to know more.”

“Screw you, dingus,” Robin exclaims as she pushes him.

Steve wrinkles his nose and replies: “I’d rather you not.”

“Iewww,” Robin shudders, but she’s laughing too. Both of them taking a moment to giggle, before Robin sighs wistfully and says: “She’s just so pretty.” Then Robin groans and boinks her head on the counter. “And painfully straight. I listened to her talk about Tom Cruise for like an hour yesterday. The worst thing? I didn’t even mind, because she looks cute when she’s excited.”

Steve graciously suppresses the urge to laugh at her and just pats her back in a sympathetic manner, because he knows how much that sucks. “You’re gonna be okay, Robs. It sucks to have a crush on a straight person.”

“How would you know?” she asks, coming up from where she has buried her head in her arms to glare at him. “Eddie has taken to parading around with a hanky in his pocket, like I won’t know what that means. You had a chance.”

Had a chance, Steve repeats to himself, feeling a little stab. He could have if he hadn’t been so scared and such a dick. But Robin is lamenting her own crush, so he’s not going to be sad about his love life, especially because that will be an invitation to talk to him about how he’s flirting with girls everywhere and Steve knows what Robin is doing. She hopes he’ll bite and won’t ask more about her new crush that she has been trying to hide.

So, instead he doesn’t bite and just says: “I’ve had crushes on other people, you know. And I didn’t have a chance with them.”

“Who?” Robin demands, now fully dropping the gloom, much to Steve’s relief, he hates seeing her sad.

“Jonathan,” he admits, wanting to jump into a ditch and hide the moment he does.

“What?” Robin exclaims with glee in her voice. “Why didn’t you tell me that, dingus. That is important to know. You had a crush on the guy that stole your girlfriend.”

“I mean, we fought and it kind of made me realize some things,” Steve shrugs in embarrassment.

“You had a crush on him because he beat you up?” Robin asks, eyes nearly falling out of her sockets as she interrogates him.

“No,” Steve scowls, crossing his arms. “And we were talking about your hopeless crush, remember?”

“We can do that later, I have to hear this,” Robin waves his protest aside. “If not because he beat you up, then why?”

“He just made me realize I didn’t want to keep being King Steve when he beat me up,” Steve explains. “And then when I went to apologize we had to run from the demogorgon and he grabbed my hand and pulled me to safety. And I realized I liked that a little more than I should.”

“Oh my god, that is the best thing I have ever heard,” Robin squeals.

“Shut up, shut up, shut up,” Steve replies, hands over his ears.

“No, come on, this is great,” Robin grins. “I’m never going to let you forget that you had a crush on Jonathan because he held you hand.”

“Fuck off, I also held your hand, didn’t get a crush on you,” Steve pouts.

“Not really the right demographic, now am I?” Robin counters. “Unlike what you want to make everyone think. What happened there? Are you okay?”

“No, we’re not turning it around on me,” Steve snaps. “I meant it. I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s just talk about your crush and let me forget about it, okay? Please.”

Something in his voice must tell her how serious he is, because she nods seriously, despite obviously not wanting to and collapses back over the counter, lamenting about Chrissy in her cheer uniform and her soft cheeks and adorable giggle.

Despite having been friends with Chrissy for about a year now, Robin mentions things that Steve has never consciously registered about her. It’s odd but interesting to look at his friend through different eyes. Like, he never really noticed Chrissy had dimples, but when he thinks about it, she totally does.

It’s actually really cute how much Robin likes Chrissy, but Steve is also scared for her. He knows Chrissy is cool about the gay thing, though that might not translate to lesbians, since Robin hasn’t come out yet. However, that does not mean, she won’t break Robin’s heart.

Steve cares about both of them very much, but he will probably choose Robin, if this crush blows up in their faces. He might not have known Robin the longest, but they’ve been through so much together. You don’t just forget about that. And, despite how he is partially ignoring it, Robin is also queer, he will always support her and understand her struggles. Even if that means loosing Chrissy in the process.

Fuck, he just hopes Chrissy is at least cool about it, or that Robin’s crush blows over before something can happen.

Over the following weeks, it seems like life hates him more and more, as it continues to get worse and worse. It’s nothing big, but life seems to get lonelier.

Robin, of course, still fills his every moment when she can, but she still has school and finals are coming up as well. So, he sees her primarily when driving her to school, or at work, or when they’re both failing to fall asleep.

Mike has never liked him, so his lessening in appearance doesn’t come as a surprise. While Dustin still comes by, but less often than he used to, swept up into Hellfire club, robotics team and the never ending homework of high school. Meanwhile, Lucas has made varsity team, so he is also busy. Steve is so proud of him, but he just hopes that the basketball team doesn’t chew him up and spit him out while Steve can’t look out for him.

Lucas and Max have also broken up, so he doesn’t hang out with Lucas at the trailer park anymore either. He still has gone by to check on her, but she isn’t around or doesn’t open the door. Whenever he is there, he can feel Eddie’s trailer judging him from behind. So, he stopped.

However, he still trains with Lucas from time to time, teaching him things about basketball that he still remembers from when he was star player on the team. Like today, just the two of them shooting hoops on the Sinclair’s driveway.

It’s Wednesday and Chrissy canceled on Steve. She has been doing that more often and Steve doesn’t know what to do about it. Whenever they do hang out, she is still herself and Robin doesn’t note much out of the ordinary if the amount of times she waxes poetry about Chrissy’s smile is anything to go off.

For now, he tries to put it out of his mind and focus on Lucas. He yells: “Don’t dribble too hard, just above the knee. Stay in control.”

Lucas switches up his dribble slightly and Steve immediately has a harder time taking the ball from him. He can see in Lucas’ grin that he notices it too. They twirl around each other for a little longer, before Lucas can make a shot.

Both of them turn to watch as the ball arcs through the air, before bouncing on the rim once, twice, before falling next to it and rolling away with a slight bounce. Steve grimaces and forces a cheer in his voice as he says: “You’ll get it next time.”

He goes to get the ball, leaving Lucas a second the wallow in private, before turning back. In that time, Lucas has slumped on the steps of the house in a way that suggest that he isn’t getting up again. He seems done for the day, but the defeated pose doesn’t sit right with Steve.

So, he sits down next to Lucas and lets the quiet hang over them for a second. Then he asks: “You doing okay?”

The boy next to him sighs in a way that makes him seem way older than he should be. He shrugs, then pauses, before shaking his head. “Not really, no.”

“Wanna talk about it?” Steve offers. He might not be the best at comforting, but he at least knows what Lucas has been through, what he has seen. Sometimes it’s enough to be understood.

“Max has been distant lately,” Lucas says. “She barely talks to us in the hallways of school and we never see her anywhere else. It’s like she’s a ghost sometimes. I don’t know what’s happening. She seemed fine a few weeks ago.”

Steve has noticed the same thing, but he doesn’t want to worry Lucas more when it’s obviously eating at him. So he takes a moment to think. Then he replies: “Max is a tough cookie. She just needs a little bit. Billy’s birthday is coming up, I’m sure that must mess with her a little. She’ll reach out again when she’s ready.”

“You really think so?” Lucas asks, finally looking up from where he’d hung his head. It’s a little like he’s perking up with the glimmer of hope.

In all honesty, Steve isn’t sure. He likes to think she will, but he could be wrong. However, he doesn’t want to rip away the hope he has given Lucas, so he just smiles: “Yeah, I do.”

Lucas smiles back and Steve feels a little guilty, but also glad to see him smile like that. Lucas has already been through much, much more than he should. He wants Lucas to be happy. He still remembers how terrified he looked as Billy had him pinned. It still appears in his nightmares, the what if he hadn’t been on time plaguing him.

So, he pushes away the guilt and moves the topic to something more fun. “You’re becoming really good at avoiding my blocks. A little more and I won’t stand a chance against you.”

“Thanks,” Lucas huffs with a small laugh. “Now if only coach saw that and I could be on the court next game instead of being a bench warmer.”

“Don’t be to hard on yourself, man,” Steve tells him. “You already made varsity in your freshman year, that’s huge. Most don’t make it until the second semester sophomore and then they’re still bench warmers, because coach wants to give the older players scouting chances. Trust me, next year you’re going to be star player.”

“You think so?” Lucas asks.

“Yeah, I do,” Steve says, this time not lying. Lucas is a talent. He adds as a joke: “I might not have been on the team in a while, but I still remember Jason’s try outs for varsity when I was star player in junior year. All his talk is a recent development.”

Lucas is smiling at the start of the sentence, but as he goes on, he sees something dim in how he holds himself. Steve doesn’t think he said anything to get that reaction and frowns: “Hey, where is your mind going off to?”

“The team,” Lucas says, sounding a little hesitant.

Steve still remembers what dicks the team used to be, both when he was on it and when he got bullied away. His heart stops beating as a fear seizes him. “Are they being assholes to you?” he asks immediately. “Because I still have the nail bat and I can have a talk with them.”

“No, no, not that,” Lucas quickly says, which is good to hear, but there is something in his tone that makes Steve suspicious.

“But…” he prompts when Lucas keeps his lips together as if he is keeping something in.

Lucas looks away and rubs the back of his head. He lets out a deep breath, hyping himself up, before looking back at Steve and admitting: “They’re just saying really messed up things about you.”

Oh.

Oh.

“Oh,” Steve says out loud, he didn’t expect that. Well, he did. He had just hoped the shine would have worn off by the time the kids got Hawkins High, but apparently it’s still bad enough that it got to Lucas. Though Chrissy mentioned how Jason seemingly still has it out for him ever since she rejected him for Steve.

A flash of embarrassment goes through him as he imagines what the others on the basketball team might have said about him. He is well aware of what rumors those boys spread. About how he’s a fag, and a whore fag at that. That he’ll get on his knees for anyone willing to give him the time of day. That he was a filthy queer that stared in the locker rooms. That he was a pussy that hid behind a group of girls. How easily he goes down after a punch. How easily he takes it.

He has heard it all when he still walked those halls. He learned to ignore it and he learned to lie about it to the kids, because he didn’t want them to ever hear that about him. To have the image he held with them be tainted. But they had.

At least Lucas had, because if Max had heard Billy didn’t keep his promise, she would have been upset with Steve and come to him. And Dustin obviously wouldn’t have kept his mouth shut about it.

Fuck, Lucas knows those rumors.

Lucas has heard how Steve might be gay, something he has kept away from all the kids except Will, because Will needed to know it. And now he is still in that limbo, where he knows it about himself, but is working so hard to keep others from seeing.

What if Lucas is looking closer? What if he has guessed? What if all of them know? What if they’re all disgusted by it and that’s why they’ve gotten too busy to hang around Steve anymore?

He doesn’t know what Lucas sees in his face, but he looks like he wants the ground to swallow him up. Yet, he tries to comfort Steve with: “It’s not too bad.”

An involuntary laugh escapes Steve at the placating lie, the disbelief obvious. There is no way it’s not still terrible, but the fact that Lucas is trying to comfort him, eases his nerves a bit.

“Okay, so it is quite bad,” Lucas winces, wringing his hands. “Why didn’t you ever tell us what was happening at school?”

Steve scoffs, can’t help the reaction, and says: “Lucas, I would never drop my shit on a bunch of kids. You all had enough to deal with. I was doing fine anyway. It wasn’t that bad.”

“They’re calling you all sorts of slurs and saying that you’re going to die of AIDS, how is that okay, Steve?” Lucas exclaims, startling Steve with the volume of the outburst.

“Well, it’s not true, so it doesn’t matter,” Steve snaps back.

He doesn’t want to think about how he knows exactly what slurs Lucas is talking about, how they have always clung to him, adding weight to all that drags him down, because he knows they’re true, how he’s been scared shitless of AIDS ever since he last saw his father, even though he has been extra safe when he does fuck, and how those are girls, which make him uncomfortable, a thing he also doesn’t want to think about.

Lucas reels back again by how forcefully Steve says them and Steve internally cringes at how that probably doesn’t help his point, though he keeps a poker face despite it.

He studies Steve for a second and Steve practically holds his breath as he keeps it up, he hopes that Lucas will drop it. He doesn’t, instead, Lucas gets a little quieter. He looks at the ground, then glances back up at Steve and softly says: “But it still hurts, doesn’t it?”

The comment goes deeper than this conversation. It is a cry for recognition. A plea to be heard. To be seen in a pain. A pain that Lucas thinks they might share.

Steve might not be the smartest, but he’s also not an idiot. He knows why Billy went after Lucas but not Dustin for hanging around his sister, knows that fag isn’t the only slur the basketball team throws around, knows that Lucas will hear that too, even if they don’t target him directly and how that can still hurt.

And while he doesn’t want to say anything that might be suspicious, Lucas is one of his kids and he needs to not be alone right now, so he matches Lucas’ quiet tone and admits: “Yeah, it does hurt, a lot. And it fucking sucks.”

Lucas looks relieved by the admission, though an air of sadness still hangs around them. Neither of them can fully know what the other is going through, but for a moment they aren’t alone in their misery and sometimes that can be enough. Lucas huffs out a small laugh and agreed: “It does fucking suck.”

“Don’t tell your mom I used that word,” Steve jokingly threatens. He is glad he was able to help Lucas feel better, but he needs this conversation to be over now. To not have Lucas go poking further than this.

“I won’t,” Lucas laughs. “Besides, she’s heard worse from Dustin.”

“Dustin got some of that from me, I have to be honest there,” Steve comments with a grin, making Lucas laugh more.

Steve wants to move on to other things, however, something is still gnawing on him. He is not there to protect these kids and he cares so much about them, so he needs to be assured that Lucas will be okay on his own in the basketball team. “The others aren’t targeting you, right?”

“No,” Lucas assures him. “Patrick has taken me under his wing a bit, which is nice. He’s also black and good friends with Jason, so they mostly leave us be.” He’s quiet for a second, then adds: “It’s some of the other kids that get targeted. I never really do anything and I feel like I’m the worst because of it.”

“Don’t,” Steve immediately says and Lucas looks surprised, as if he expected Steve to say something different. After all the times Steve threw himself between them and danger that is pretty valid, but that is so much different than this. That isn’t a permanent slight in the eyes of the town, Steve knows how that feels. It is very much not the same.

“Don’t?” Lucas repeats with a confused frown.

“It’s not worth it, trust me,” Steve tells him. “The next time they rag on a poor kid, who also doesn’t deserve it or talk shit about me, you stay quiet, you hear me? You keep your mouth shut. Me and some random kid, aren’t worth being an outcast over. I know it sucks, but it’s how to survive high school. Promise me?”

“Okay, yeah, I promise,” Lucas says, unsettled by the intensity.

Steve isn’t under the illusion that he is the first to say this to Lucas. His parents must be worried sick about him as well, but Lucas might be more willing to listen to Steve than his uncool parents, especially since Steve has a hero status in Lucas’ mind. So, he says it anyway.

“Good, just keep your head down and stick to Patrick,” Steve nods. “Patrick cool?”

“Yeah,” Lucas says with a small smile. “He’s a little withdrawn, but he has this sick fade away long shot that he’s been teaching me.”

“Sounds great. Show me?” Steve asks, getting up and holding the ball out to Lucas. It’s a way to get out of their heads again, away from the heavy conversation, something Steve thinks they both need right now.

Fortunately, Lucas takes the ball with a grin, both of them getting back in position, so that Lucas can show off the shot. It’s a fun way to forget about all the bad and Steve sees himself in Lucas, how he used sports to get out of his head for a bit. That afternoon, he vows to go to all of his games, even if he’s on the bench every time.

Over the following weeks, Steve is there at all Lucas’ games as the team slowly climbs their way up through the championships. Steve has to admit they’re good, they might stand a chance at winning this year.

Meanwhile, life goes on in other places as well, in its own rickety way.

Chrissy cancels more and more, it’s been weeks since they stunted together, even if they finally got their handstand stunt. Steve misses it more than he wants to admits. Misses Chrissy even more, only glimpsing at her during Lucas’ games, her smiles looking fake and her cheer uniform loose.

Steve worries about her, but knows it isn’t his place to talk about her struggles with Robin. So, he just gives Robin a little too many snacks and hopes she knows how to share. However, Chrissy is no longer sitting with Robin during lunch, another worrying development that has other consequences as well.

“She totally knows!” Case in point. Robin is hanging over the counter, looking defeated. She has been the only person not falling apart around Steve and he needs her to be okay. He hates to see her sad like this. Especially when he can’t fix it.

“How would she know?” he counters, knowing it’s not enough, but having to try anyway.

Robin glares at him, before throwing her hands about: “I don’t know, dingus. Maybe I stared at her too long or said something embarrassing and weird, because I keep on humiliating myself around her and she caught on and now she hates me.”

“Chrissy doesn’t hate you,” Steve insists. He is 99% sure of that, despite the lack of contact between them now. There is something else going on with her, he just doesn’t know what and that bothers him to all hell.

“Did she tell you that?” Robin counters.

“You know she didn’t,” Steve glares at her, before taking a deep calming breath. They both have been on edge and the last thing he wants to do, is snap at her and have yet another friendship fall apart.

Robin is observing him and when he looks at her again, normally this time, she says: “Sorry, I didn’t mean to push.”

“It’s okay,” he sighs. “It’s not like you’re in control of her pulling away.”

“And what if I am? What if I’m right and she did notice my crush on her and now she’s disgusted and pulling away? What then?” Robin rambles anxiously.

“Then she’s a dick and we don’t want to be friends with her,” Steve states, because that is obvious in his brain. “But that’s not the reason, she’s too nice for that.”

“You sure?” Robin asks.

“I’m sure,” Steve confirms.

They’re both quiet for a second, then Robin speaks up, her voice an odd mix of disbelief, awe and skepticism, as she asks: “You would really drop her if she wasn’t okay with my crush?”

It’s an echo of when Steve figured her out, when she was unsure if Steve would be okay with it and it still amazes him that she doesn’t know that he would do anything for her. “Yeah, I would. Of course, I would. Why wouldn’t I?”

“I don’t know,” Robin shrugs, not meeting his eyes. “You two have been friends longer than we have. I wouldn't hold it against you.”

“Robs, 1) if she is homophobic, I don’t want to be friends with her and 2) you’re my platonic soulmate, I’m always going to put you first,” he says, putting as much intent and genuineness in his voice as he can in the hope she’ll believe him.

“Platonic soulmates, eh?” she grins, not fully acknowledging it, but tentatively daring to believe by not countering it or questioning him.

“With a capital P,” Steve grins back. “You’re stuck with me now, Buckley.”

“I’m holding you to that, Stevie,” she replies, knowing he doesn’t like his last name.

The next day are the championships. Steve is in Family Video alone, waiting until he can go clock out and get the girl he’s bringing for show. He’s a little self aware around the basketball team since his talk with Lucas, so it will be good to be seen with a girl on his arm.

He’s bored out of his mind, so glad when the phone rings. He picks up: “You’ve reached Family Video, this is Steve. How-”

“Yeah, Steve,” Dustin cuts of his standard greeting. “I need you to play DnD with me and the rest of Hellfire tonight.”

“What? Why?” Steve replies, unsure why they would be playing tonight.

“Because it’s the ending of the campaign and we need someone else,” Dustin says. “Eddie is on our ass to find someone, please.”

At the mention of Eddie’s name, a shiver goes through his body. He cannot face Eddie. Not like that. The need to hide away comes over him and he throws out: “No, I can’t, I have a date.”

“Just move your date this one time,” Dustin demands. “Come on.”

Usually Steve is a pushover and would easily bend to that demand, but he can’t. Lucas is playing tonight, it’s the championship. And it’s Eddie. Eddie, who hates him. Eddie, who makes him feel things. And he just can’t.

His brain goes to a patented method and a little meanly he says: “What? To hang out with you and Eddie “The Freak” Munson? Uh, yeah, I’ll pass.”

The moment he says it, he hates himself. He vowed not to do this anymore and now he is. Fuck, why is he like that?

Dustin doesn’t notice, luckily, and just says: “You’re just jealous because I have another older male friend.”

And a part of Steve is jealous. Jealous that Dustin gets to hang out with Eddie without feeling like he wants to explode, either from horniness, fear or embarrassing mushy feelings. Feelings that also make him want to hide away.

He knows he has them, that they won’t go away, but every time he thinks he can accept that, another voice speaks up and crushes it. It’s a constant battle and at this point, he isn’t even sure what team he’s on.

But he doesn’t tell Dustin that, instead he says: “Iew. Ugh. Whatever,” before making up some story about really digging this girl, whose name he has already forgotten, before pretending a customer comes in, so he can hang up on Dustin.

It’s not until, he’s getting ready to go for the game, that he is centered enough to realize that Dustin was looking for a replacement for Lucas. That Eddie isn’t postponing the session so Lucas can be there and make the championship.

If they were still friends, he would’ve said something about it to Eddie. Then he realizes that this might be Eddie outing his anger at Steve and all his jockiness that he showed Eddie when he stomped all over him. And he feels a little sicks with it.

Fuck, hopefully spring break will be what they all need to get off this roller coaster again. A little bit of a break away from it all will be good for them.

~~

A/N:

Robin being surprised that Steve wants to be her friend, that she is also friends with Chrissy, that they want her around, it’s breaking my heart </3

Also Lucas deserves so much more and the Duffers keep doing him dirty, I’m so mad about that actually >:(

(Disclaimer: I am white and probably not the best to write about this, but it wanted to note the fact that Lucas is dealing with other shit too in there as well. Hopefully that came across okay and if I said anything offensive, please let me know)

#rr writing #stranger things #steve harrington #steddie #eddie munson #robin buckley #platonic stobin #stobin #buckingham #chrissy cunningham #cheerleader steve harrington au #lucas sinclair #the party #the party stranger things #st season 4 #dustin henderson #max mayfield #jonathan byers #tw: eating disorder #tw: homophobia #tw: f slur #tw: internalized homophobia #tw: racism #tw: bullying mention #tw: aids crisis mention

[yours-etc]

Pancakes For Dinner

Short little ficlet based on this song <3

Pt. 1, Pt. 2 (coming soon)

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Eddie is pacing his living room back and forth back and forth back and forth back and—

“Dude will you sit down you’re making yourself more stressed!!” Chrissy yells at him from their couch. 

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me Chris, I'm a writer this is what I do! So why is it so fucking hard to write a best man speech for my best friend, besides you of course Chris” Eddie adds to the end in quickly to cover his ass. 

“probably because you’ve been in love with him since high school eds! And you need to tell him, because if you don’t he will marry that stupid rich bitch his mommy set him up with who he’s only marrying to make her happy and because he thinks he has no shot with you! And somewhere down the line probably 6-10 years in they’ll get a terrible divorce and he’ll have an early midlife crisis and buy a boat or a condo in Florida. he’s settling and he knows it and you are ignoring it.” 

Eddie stops in his tracks and looks at Chrissy. they grew up together, practically siblings. eddie’s mom nannied for her family and eventually, Eddie was born and so was Chrissy. Raised together like siblings as Chrissy was the youngest of 3 sisters who were all moved out by the time Chris could walk. she has been here through every broken bone (4), every school play (6), a gay crisis, and one big fat crush on his guy best friend.

Steve and Eddie meet in freshman year English class. well, not Eddie’s freshman year, Steve’s. Eddie was two years older than Steve and so ended up being his English tutor to get extra credit in his own lit class. Eddie was smart, he just hated school. And yeah he repeated senior year twice making him and Steve graduate at the same time, but they both got the same degree in the end. 

“I just don’t get it!” Steve would yell about Romeo and Juliet and Huckleberry Finn and Frankenstein and Dracula and pretty much any book he had to read…

Eddie would always smile and say “Don't worry steve-o, that’s what I'm here for”

Eventually tutor sessions turned into to hang out sessions turned into smoke sessions turned into crashing on one another’s couch. and yeah they’ve woken up a few times in… not totally platonic positions, but they were high and half asleep, no one could be blamed, so they didn’t talk about it. but Eddie and Chrissy did. 

“Chris he doesn’t like me like that!” Eddie finally says responding to her. 

“Bullshit! If he’s not in love with you then Robin and I are a straight couple!”

“That doesn’t make sense—“

“Shut up it doesn’t matter. how about you write two speeches. one where you pore you’re heart and soul out to him declaring your undying gay love, and then write the one that’s appropriate to say at his wedding. I would say just tell him now, but you know it’s your life, all I know is you need to get it off your chest one way or another.”

She was right. Eddie kissed her on the head and walked to his room and locked the door. 

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Eddie didn’t even make it two steps into the bar before Lucas, Dustin, Mike, and Will, some kids Steve started babysitting in high school to make some extra cash who grew up to be both of their favorite gaggle of kids, cornered him by the door. 

“so what are you going to do?” Dustin asks

Eddie looked at all four of them, “I plan to get him shitfaced, hold his hair back when he eventually throws it all up, and have the perfect hangover cure for him waiting in the morning so he can… make it down the aisle.” 

Mike rolls his eyes, “You know that’s not what we are talking about.”

“We are talking about you stopping Steve from marrying the Richie Bitch!” will whisper yells. 

The envelope in Eddie’s coat pocket suddenly weighs about 100 tons. He didn’t know why he brought it. The letter is about three pages long with lots of chicken scratch and eraser marks, but it’s all of Eddie on paper. And maybe he’ll give it to Steve, maybe he won’t. He hadn’t quite decided yet. “What makes you think I can stop him?” Eddie asks. 

“Because you’re the only one he listens to, besides Robin, but even she’s getting desperate!” Lucas pipes in. 

“Guys, I’ve tried, We’ve all tried. He’s not budging, all we can do is be there for him through all of it. Eventually, it will crash and burn but until then, we put on fake ass smiles and we are happy for him.” Eddie says addressing all of them, “Now I’m going to grab a table, order a round of drinks, and I expect all of you to just focus on making Steve’s party the best part it possibly could be.”

He shoved past them to grab a booth, set his jacket down, and went to the bar. And yeah he downed a couple, maybe a few, okay a handful of shots, for confidence, that's all. The longer he sat there the more he wanted to pull his hair out individually by each strand. He knew he couldn’t let Steve go through with it, but he didn’t want to lose Steve completely, because that would break him. Like completely and totally shatter him into a million pieces that would get scattered into the wind. And yes, Eddie was aware of how cliche he was starting to sound. 

Eventually, he made it back to the table with a round of drinks for everyone, Steve walked in looking, well looking gorgeous. It’s like that moment in the movies where the whole room disappears and it is just the two main characters. There’s a love song playing, except this is a crowded dive bar and they are playing some Zeppelin song that Eddie can’t take the time to name because Steve walks in with too tight a shirt and too tight pants and Eddie is only a man. 

And suddenly the envelope in his pocket is not only 100 tons but also on fire.

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Pt.2 coming soon...

#stranger things #steddie #ficlet