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altagraye · 11 days

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Through A Glass, Darkly Part 6- Stay

TW:

MINORS DNI ! (18+ ONLY!)

Violence, Mild sexual themes, sexual suggestive thoughts (cuz Rumlow is a bastard!), experimentation without consent.

Through a Glass Darkly part 6: Stay

An American HYDRA base

Somewhere within The 100- Mile wilderness, Maine

2024, around July

52 hours after y/n’s capture

Sleep was possibly the only escape from that hellish place. But if you weren’t awake, you’d miss time with Winter. He insisted you get rest, so you couldn’t deny him. The scratchy wool blanket and one pillow provided out of the goodness of HYDRA’s heart could take the edge off. It was cold down where you were.

You didn’t know how far down you were, but you imagine it was something like Alcatraz on steroids. You woke from your slumber just briefly, to find that Winter had crawled in with you.

His warm skin, close to yours. He was the only peace you had in this place, a kind of solace if you will. And it was probably the same for him. You snuggled into him, nestling in like two puzzle pieces. You felt so safe with him and you were glad that he was letting himself get close to you.

He deserved to be loved a million times over. You didn’t dream this time, but instead you lost yourself in the warmth of having someone you cared about next to you. It was a kind of intimacy only shared between lovers.

Just like anything within these barren walls, your peace was short lived. You were physically taken out of bed, by Rumlow. Dragged from your warm space so quickly, you hardly had time to know what was going on. Winter was quick to assess the situation. Rumlow kept his palm with a bruising grip over your mouth.

“Shhhhh. Little girl. Time for a check up.” Rumlow said sinister, and licking the shell of your ear. Winter had gone feral, in no time.

Winter punched the other guard square in the face with his flesh hand. A sickening sound of bone crunching and blood trickling down from the man's face. Winter was desperate. He raised the guard up by his neck this time with his metallic arm. Gripping tightly on his windpipe.

"Don't think I won't snap his neck, faster than you can blink!" Winter threatened. You struggled against Rumlows’ grip.

"You sure about that? Wanna watch her bleed out? Your little fuck toy. I bet you'd screw her even when she's cold 'n' grey." Rumlow egged on wielding a sharp knife against your throat. Feeling the sting of the sharp metal slicing your tender skin.

You started to sob, you knew how serious the situation was. Realizing any second could be your last. HYDRA could very easily kill you, after all you were just a means of entertainment for their weapon. For Winter, something he could have to pass the time by with. You were replaceable. And that terrified both you and Winter.

Winter was at a crossroads, he knew Rumlow would leap at the chance to kill you. Anything to see a little more suffering, that’s what Rumlow really got off on. Seeing people hurt as if they deserved terrible fates. Rumlow tightened his grip on you, but took something out of one of the pockets on his tactical suit. Uncapping the object with his teeth and spitting it onto the floor of the pen, that Winter and you called home. Before you had time to react, you flashed a look to Winter. You knew well that his hands were tied. But if anything were to happen to you, whatever they were going to do next, you wanted to look at Winter one last time. Staring back at you, you saw pain. But maybe Winter himself didn’t know how to feel about this emotion.

The needle plunged deep into your jugular, and before the stopper could empty its contents, your eyes were fluttering shut.

Your head lolled drunkenly from side to side as you were being trudged through a maze of hallways and corridors. Various beeping sounds, of places off limits to you, doors opening to deeper destinations of horror passed you by. It was impossible to try and map yourself out of this. You could probably take more than a few punches, get your way out of wherever they were sending you. But you’d be lost.

Suddenly, your head thrashed back, hitting a flimsy excuse for a pillow, with credible force. Your vision is accosted by bright white lights. And you were lifted into the air, on this sort of table. A girl, who couldn't have been above the age of 10, slipped through the door. Her hair was a beautiful shade of chestnut brown that fell somewhere around her waist. Her eyes, for a brief moment, seemed as if they were examining you. Oddly you didn’t mind. It was peaceful to be around this. Child. But how did she get here? It was as if you were looking into the eyes of a divine being.

A blonde woman quickly came to her side, “Don’t run from me ever again!” she scolded the girl sternly. The woman’s eyes jutting to your own, in a hauntingly knowing kind of way.

“But, I wanted to see the subject. Is she sick?” the girl asked, still looking at what you assumed was her mother. The woman led the girl away from you and toward the door of the dingy operating room, her grip tight on the arm of the child. You wanted to speak, maybe they could get you out of here, some help maybe? Or they could relay a message to Bucky, or Nat and Sam? Hell, anybody.

“Yes! She’s terribly sick. The world’s finest doctors are going to help her.” The woman said, as she hurriedly rushed the girl away from the room, closing the door with a loud click. Doctors? I’m not sick. You thought. But it was hard to formulate much of anything in your state.

More people you didn’t recognize came into the room. Preparing tools and machines for some kind of procedure. Shit! What are they going to do to me?! You thought. You tried to get up from your bed, but your head was pounding against your skull. Like you’d had the worst hangover you’ve ever had. Some nurses tied your limbs taught with straps to the metal table. You struggled, but gave up just as quickly. Your hands formed fists as you began to hyperventilate. You needed your powers back.

You need to be able to defend yourself, now more than ever. Whatever HYDRA put in you, had been successful in weakening your powers. You tensed, trying to get those sparks to fly. But they fizzled out. You opened your eyes, the blinding lights of the operating room still ahead. One more time. You can get Winter free from this place, if only you had your fire! Out of the corner of your eye, sensing movement from your right, you saw Alexander Pierce come into the room. You clenched your jaw.

Seeing him made rage boil within you. At what he’d done to Winter for so long. Pierce noticed your disgust you had for him. Boldly without trepidation, he hovered over you. He looked into your eyes, and you steadied your gaze. You weren’t going to let him take advantage of you, if you could help it. Pierce’s eyes tightened, the challenge he saw in you, made him livid. A sharp pain struck your cheek. A slap? What was that going to do now? You’ve already been beaten, and thrown into a cage, what else could he possibly do to you?

“(Zimnyaya roza) Зимняя роза*, I own you. Start the procedure!!” he announced to everyone inside the room. *Winter Rose

You began to lift yourself up, anything to resist what they were going to do to you. But you hadn’t realized you were already restrained. You tried your fire again. However, you only gave off cobalt colored sparks. Pierce had an odd look on his face. Almost as if he was surprised, and oddly hopeful. But for what exactly? Yet another needle found its way into your veins. Your vision going blurry, changing from white, to grey, to nothing but black.

You were terrified. Your heart was pumping nearly out of your chest. Unable to see anything, or speak, or even aware of where you were. Was this it? Had they killed you? What was next for you if you had truly died? Was there really anything on the other side? You felt cold, like you were drenched in water and exposed to flowing air. You felt your torso shoot up from where you were. Your eyes flying open, your lungs filling rapidly with breath. You were alive, this time.

A scream, more like a wail, left your throat. Darkness was all around you, everything inside you was pure and animalistic, fear. Until his blue appeared in your sights. His sweet, sweet everlasting blue. You never wanted to cry, especially in front of anyone. You usually cried alone, before solidifying yourself and continuing on. But this time your emotions were so raw, the tears just flooded over.

“Winter!” you exclaimed, noticing how you were trembling, Winter held you close, only with his flesh arm. He never felt comfortable letting his left arm touch you. Out of fear it may corrupt you. His kind gesture somehow made you break down further. Beginning to sob hysterically in his hold.

He cupped your cheek, his palm rough and calloused. He shushed you gently, his forehead touching your own. “It’s over. It’s over. I’m here. Mo Thaisce, I’m here. They can’t hurt you.” he repeated until you started to regain yourself.

You were back in your cell, with Winter. But you knew what had happened to you was no dream. It was real. But you had no clue what they’d done to you. He rocked you gently for a few minutes until you both had ended up laying flat on the mattress. It was all so confusing and terrifying. As if they’d erased your memory of what they’d done. You never want to go back to that room again.

And that would mean you must be on your best behavior, no retaliation. Only complete compliance was acceptable. Your memory was jumbled and hazy at best. For right now you could only remember and focus on Winter.

Once Winter noticed you had calmed down, he shifted, wanting to sit in his normal spot, out of the stingy excuse for the bed, and onto the cold concrete of the cell floor. You’d stopped him, grabbing onto his metal arm. This caught him off guard. To your surprise he flinched, as if he expected something terrible to happen to you once you touched him.

“Please… Stay,” you managed to croak out, your voice raw. Winter gawked at you in the faint light of the cell, the only light available during ‘sleeping’ hours came from the recording cameras. Winter swallowed thickly, his brow furrowing. With some weariness, Winter stayed. Holding you close to his burly form, his fingers intertwining into your silken locks. He didn’t want you to feel pain. Not from this wretched place. Winter didn’t sleep even though he was commanded to do so. He rarely broke protocol, he’d learned his lesson far too long ago for breaking the rules. But, he could not resist watching over her until she slept, warm and frail in his hold.

In this moment, Winter vowed to always protect this echo of a woman he had once loved. Was it perhaps a sick form of gratification? Redemption? Atonement? Possibly. Yes, quite possibly.

Sharp protests from the doors hinges were what woke you next. It almost made you cry. You didn’t want anything to do with these vile people. Winter was already awake, maybe he hadn’t slept at all. He watched every move from the two guards. Rumlow was not present this time. However, that didn’t make the situation any less nerve-wracking.

“Relax Cujo. Your whore needs to get dressed. It’s mission day.” one of the guards said as he crouched down to Winter’s level. The other guard gave you a dress, among other fancy garb for you to wear. You’d armed yourself with the small knives they’d given you.

Stuffing them in any place that was concealed, a short knife fitting in the heel of your dress shoe. As usual, they’d blindfolded the both of you. Not knowing where you were going only added a new level to this macabre circus act. You and Winter were stuffed in some sort of plane, a Quinjet maybe? From what you could hear there were a fair amount of other operatives in the plane with you. A small HYDRA execution team.

Your job still remains the same. Keep eyes on the target, Be in communication with Winter. Don’t get yourself killed. In and out. Smooth, no flukes. Like a well programmed machine. Rumlows voice came as a surprise to you from inside the cabin.

“Today’s target is high profile. Dangerous, so don’t do anything stupid that’ll get you killed. Alright princess? The op team will have 6 people in it. Soldat, Princess, Me, and the three of you . The target has powers over time. They can bend it at will. So stay sharp.” Rumlow informed us.

Time? Like the Time stone? Are we going to be executing Dr. Strange? You nodded your head to let him know you heard him. You remember fighting alongside him and Wong during the infinity war. They were quite powerful. There’s no way we can execute him. He’ll just keep rewinding us. Shit! I’m going into a sorcerer fight with toothpicks!

Your throat began to dry up, and you swallowed thickly. You had no idea how you were going to get through this one.

“You alright Y/N?” Winter asked through the comm system in your ear piece. You chewed on your lip as you entered the building, beads of sweat forming on the back of your neck.

“I could be better. This mission. It’s not going to be easy.” you replied.

“No mission is easy. But you can get close to the target. I’m not far away. I–” his sentence was cut short.

Leaning into your ear piece just outside the building, as you waited in line to enter, “Winter?!” more desperation coating his name than you’d like to reveal.

“I’m fine. I just got rid of the people on the roof. Don’t worry so much, Mo Thaisce.”

“Jesus fuckin’ Christ. Get a room, you two! Oh, wait you do have one. Guess you’re camera shy huh Princess? Afraid to show us some skin?” Rumlow came over the comm system.

“I really want to burn your tongue out from your skull.” you said with clenched teeth. Taking a sigh to calm your nerves, which didn’t work, you stared up at the building.

“Your breathing is quick. Are you alright?” Asked Winter.

“It’s just, I never expected to have a target in the White House. Thank you.” You cordially accepted the drink presented to you on a platter that one of the many servers was handing out. You reminded yourself you didn’t have to be doing any killing, but you weren’t so sure you’d be getting out scott free on this mission.

High profile target was right. More rustling was heard in your earpiece. You scoped out the first floor, meeting for a brief second with one of your HYDRA partners, who’d run through this area already.

“I don’t have a good shot on the target. I’m coming in.” Winter said.

“What? Are you crazy?! What if you get caught?” you nearly exclaimed, going up to the second floor.

“I’m not going to get caught. I’ve been doing this since the 40’s. Besides, This isn’t my first presidential mission.” he made a good point, but that didn’t lessen your anxiety. Something was off about this mission to you. Was HYDRA going to test your loyalty? Or weed you out?

“Moving to the second floor.” you alerted everyone. The second floor was sparse, but still too close for comfort. In all honesty you had no idea where you were going. You took in a deep breath. How the fuck am i gonna get close? You continued to walk down a hallway, and the idea struck you. A woman, dressed in moderate business clothes, passed by you with a lanyard and a name tag.

The two of you passed, without the woman noticing you, you shoved her into a secluded corner, and knocked her out. You took her lanyard and brushed yourself off.

“I have a way that will get me close.” you announced.

“Oh so the Princess is useful after all?” Rumlow came over the comm system again, with snotty remarks.

“Shut up and do your job, asshole.” you bit back boldly.

“Ohohoho! Some spunk, finally! Gets me all riled up. It’s a shame you and the mutt are so close. Believe me I would fuck you so hard if I could. I’d give you the time of your life Princess.” Rumlow retorted.

“Watch your damn mouth!” Winter growled.

“Eyes in position. Target is about to give a speech.” you piped up. Hoping your interruption would diffuse the heat. The room was big and full of TV cameras recording live. More than ample security guards at the ready also. You swallowed thickly.

“Winter? We have live eyes. Everyone’s watching. The world is gonna see you. I don’t feel good about this.” you whispered sitting down in your press chair.

“The more the merrier. After the Kennedy mission, I had to lay low for a month. I imagine this will be no different.” Winter said in a nonchalant way.

“Black shirts, about 10 of them. Gathered mostly at the front of the podium.”

“Only 10 this time? They’ve gotten soft in recent years. Piece of cake.” You heard the sound of a gun clicking, among various loud rustling noises. Your stomach began to do back flips as a familiar face graced the stage. Dr. Strange, the sorcerer, in this universe he’d made quite the name for himself as POTUS. The one that you’d grown to admire for a time, when you fought beside him in both wars for humanity. You’d only spent enough time with him to be a little more than acquaintances, after all the Avengers grew to be a wide swath of people and heroes alike, including yourself.

Someone you didn’t recognize stood beside him, a woman with natural beauty, a mole adorning her face with a wide and, surprisingly genuine, smile. Maybe if you’d known Stephen Strange better, then you would know this woman too. They looked as if they were effortlessly happy together. Like how John and Jackie Kennedy portrayed themselves in the public eye.

Frustrated grunts came over the ear piece, “Take the fucking shot!” whined one of your mission mates. If you could call them such. Not that you trusted anyone other than Winter.

“Christine Strange is not a name on my ledger. She will only be killed if she stands in my way.” Winter replied coolly. You supposed, he had done so much killing under the clutches of HYDRA, that he’d thought of people as mere statistics. How much humanity had he had left? He surely salvaged some for you. Maybe that was the only thing keeping him going? You couldn’t imagine being locked away in that dungeon for so many years. Being frozen only to wake up in a different time to repeat the same bloody tasks.

What if they did that to you? Kept you as one of their murderous puppets. You’d barely had time to think, entranced in memories of the past and worries of your future, when the shot rang out. Screams followed quickly after. People knocked into you as you stood still in the chaos.

“Y/N. Keep moving. Don’t draw attention to yourself.” Winter ordered softly. You blinked a couple times to get your bearings straight again, well as straight as possible. The intimidating men in black suits all had their guns drawn but some were missing. You saw movement from the back of the stage but couldn’t make out enough to get a good read on it. Instead, you decided to double back.

Leaving the room with the panic stricken as a cover was wise. But once you got out of the room, you didn’t exactly know where to go. You walked off in as quick a pace you could keep without warranting attention of onlookers through some more corridors.

Pressing on the earpiece once you were certain no one was following you, “Target eliminated. I’m moving to a secluded area n-”. Your sentence was cut off as you bumped into something hard, making you stumble a bit. Looking down, you realized it was not something but someone. Shit! Did a citizen see you? The person grabbed your forearms, to steady you. Dressed in a lavish tux, was Winter. His long blond hair pulled back into a rough bun. Was this what he meant by ‘going in’?

It was your first time seeing him in formal attire, if you hadn’t been out doing HYDRA’s dirty work, no one would know that the two of you had just contributed to the assassination of the United States president. Some part of you wished this was all just a nightmare and that you and Winter were out on an expensive date. Maybe the President was inviting you and Winter on a commemoration dinner, for valiant efforts in the defeat of Thanos.

You’d be lying if you said your heart didn’t skip a beat when you were looking at Winter in front of you. In that moment you could have kissed him, but he took your hand instead and led you to a fortunately empty back room. Fumbling with his ear piece he took it out of his ear.

“Damn. Rumlow won’t respond. Comms are down. Static feedback. That means radio silence.” Winter calculated out loud. I bit my lip and listened for any threats just beyond the door. “Give me your ear radio. We have to do this fast.” he said, holding out his metal hand, glinting in the faint moonlight streaming through the nearest window.

“Ear radio? That’s a new one. Okay but why? What’s happening?” You were beginning to ask too many questions for the time sensitive situation. He crushed the two listening devices and threw the contents into his pocket square, most likely to discard later.

“If things went as expected, Strange could have easily used the time stone to turn back time and save himself. But , that didn’t happen. Our info was rancid. Either someone gave us bad intelligence or Strange didn’t have the stone tonight.” Winter rambled off, his eyes wildly searching for an unseen answer.

“I thought he was the only one who had control over the stone? Why do we have to get rid of our devices?” you asked, holding onto his hand a little tighter. You were scared but you trusted Winter.

“One or more of our mission mates was a rat. And, Strange wasn’t the only target tonight. We still have a mission to complete. Looks like it’s 1963 all over again. We’re in it for the long haul Y/N.” Winter’s brow furrowed, his icy orbs staring back at yours. The warmth of his flesh hand left yours and carressed the tender flesh of your cheek. It was then that you noticed you were trembling.

You had to remind yourself to take a breath, filling your lungs as much as they’d let you.

“Mo Thaisce. You can trust me. I won’t let them hurt you, not if I can help it.” His words fell from his mouth as a soft plea. They were laced with a painful desperation that you could see in the harsh furrow of his brow. The fear of you possibly not being able to trust him, that’s what really terrified the Winter Soldier. You gave him a soft smile.

“I trust you.” you said finally, trying to take control of your trembling body. You smoothed your hair and the corner of your dress down, revealing your soft and toned thigh. Through your long eyelashes you felt Winter’s eyes upon you. His adams’ apple bobbed as he swallowed thickly. He tightened on the collar of his tie, maybe in an effort to distract himself from any long repressed carnal desires.

“Let’s get moving. The Rat already knows our location. And he might not be working alone.” He gave your shoulder a quick but light squeeze.

“Follow me, and don’t get lost.” he ordered. Behind his back you were unable to conceal the smirk you had. You enjoyed toying with him, just a little. You knew it wasn’t a wicked gesture, but you were surprised that you’d grown to such feelings after a little over two days with the man. It was strange to say the least. Maybe it was because the man before you felt more like a version of your Bucky you once knew. All the heart and soul of Bucky, but painted with Steve’s face. You knew sooner rather than later you’d have to tell him what you knew. What you were and where you came from. Yes he knew you were different. But to have more trust between the both of you he needed to know everything you did.

It was far into the night, escaping out the back of the White House, leaving you biting your nails. There were no threats along the way. The feds would search the complex and far beyond for any trace of the assassin. You wondered, with all the advanced technology of today , that Winter could get away with such a thing at all. You shook your head at that thought, freeing you from it. This was HYDRA you were talking about. They could cover up an assassination like it was just another day at the job. Because that is what it was for them.

You came to a dark alleyway with nothing but trash blowing in the wind and an old model Impala, its sleek black paint job glinting in the darkness. You were just barely able to tell the car was in front of you. Winter paced around the car, searching for something until he crouched down and grabbed an object from the undercarriage.

Reflexively you searched left and right for any signs that you were going to get caught. Thunder cracked overhead, making you jump. Winter smirked triumphantly as he waved the object in your direction, it looked like a grenade. It started to sprinkle as his finger tugged at the pin. You ran to him, hoping he wouldn’t blow himself into smithereens, or at least if he was, that you’d go with him.

The pin fell to the ground, and he released the trigger just as you got to his chest. He dropped the grenade and as it hit the ground, it burst into some sort of shield. The shield engulfed the both of you, now in a heap of flesh on the black top, the car, and the abandoned building adjacent to the car. Looking up, the rain now pouring down heavier than before, still hits your face and left your skin cold.

Your chest heaved from the sudden realization that you were, in fact, not dead. You looked back down at Winter, and he was chuckling.

“You thought I was going to blow us up? Y/N, never. I’d never hurt you. It’s one of HYDRA’s trinkets, made for this kind of situation. We’ll camp out here for a few days until a confirmed operative can retrieve us.” He continued to chuckle lightly, his hand warm going up to stroke your cheek and tuck a lock of soaking hair behind your ear. If it wasn’t for the sound of the pouring rain, you almost didn’t catch him say, “ What am I going to do with you?” under his breath.

The comment made your heart skip a beat and a warmth spread into your body that left you feeling shy and embarrassed. Wanting to hide your face you looked to the side at the grenade, seeing how it created this invisible shield around the two of you, technology really was something to gawk at. In the downpour you could just barely make out the police sirens.

“Winter!” you whispered harshly. Worry painting your mind as you only had seconds to find cover. Winter’s face dropped all joy and returned to his solidified nature. Opening the back passenger side door of the car, he shoved you inside gently as the sirens crept closer.

“Lay down. Keep a low profile. Damn it! I know it’s in here some– gotcha!” Searching frantically underneath the drivers’ seat, he pulled out a large dark tarp. You didn’t see how laying down on the backseat would do any good in the way of concealing two bodies in a very conspicuous car. But you complied anyway.

Winter got on top of you, and pulled the tarp over top of him, covering us both. The sirens got closer, almost deafeningly loud. You could barely hear with the sound of the sirens, and your blood pressure thumped in your ears. He had enveloped you before, but this time was different. Or at least it felt different. It was beginning to get stiflingly hot.

From this angle you could see just how broad his back was, and how much he towered over you. He made you feel small, yes, but you… enjoyed it. You felt protected and safe. As the sirens screamed and the searchlights gleamed inside the car window, you kept very still, though you couldn’t bear to close your eyes. Afraid that if you did, you might lose Winter, though he was as close to you as he possibly could be. His cerulean orbs stared back at you, and softened at the sight of your panic.

He put an index finger to his lips, a silent gesture to keep quiet. He didn’t have to tell you twice. You doubt you could speak at all, at this moment. You gulped silently, trying to rid yourself of the dryness forming in your throat. Winter peeked his head out from under the tarp. In the faint light you saw a smirk grow on his features. The bench seat creaked from the shifting of his weight to the back passenger side, next to me, shoving the tarp next to him between the door and his body. You sat up, echoes of bewilderment still showing on your face.

“Ah. stupid, laboratory junk from HYDRA. Great concealment tool though.” Winter quirked his head in approval. You gawked out the window at the grenade, still on the ground where Winter had left it.

“What about that thing?” you asked, still giving it a long look.

“A Houdini bomb, as I call it. I don’t know its real name but it will cover up anything within a one-hundred yard radius. Sound, sight, smell - it’ll cover it up like a smoke and mirror trick.it’s only weakness is rain and it lasts for only 5 days before it fizzles out. Uh. Sorry, I got too carried away again. Hehe. Kinda feel like I'm back at one of those Stark Science Fairs.” You saw his face turn a slight hue of red. He was embarrassed about his love for technology. I have to say I don’t think I would have ever seen this side of him, you thought as a gentle smile quirked on your lips.

“Stark Science Fairs are cool. Lavish and maybe a little over-the-top. But cool.” you subtly reassured him. He returned the favor with a warm grin. Unable to resist the feelings that had been brewing within you over the course of the night, you had to ask him a burning question. Even if it ended in tragedy, then you would know.

“Winter?,” you turned to face him, and his eyebrows quirked upward, “Have you ever been with a woman?”

"There were some the night I left to join the 107th. A few more after I was stationed. But, none like you. Well maybe there was only one like you." He said now facing you.

You nodded your head in agreement. You hadn't forgotten your doppelganger. Though, even before you'd arrived through the rabbit hole, she was but a Phantom in the heart of a man you deeply cared for. You remember his dark hair, and cool blue eyes like crystal waters. And a ring that seemed familiar but was not his. Your mind was completely jumbled from the events of the past few days. Getting beaten, and drugged, and treated worse than trash– left you taxed. You were surprised you were functioning at this rate.

"Y/N?," Winter asked in almost a whisper, "they… they made me do it. They made me…pull that trigger." Winter confessed.

"Yes. They made you. They did. Don't put that on you. You, and me too. We're their playthings. Please…please don't put that on you." Your voice was soft and near pleading. Instinctively you closed the gap between you two. Interlacing your delicate fingers with his metal ones. He didn't jerk away this time but he jumped and looked down at your soft flesh, still afraid he'd break something far too precious for him.

You leaned on the coolness of his shoulder, pressing your cheek to what would have been toned muscle. Even though you were soaked from head to toe, your hair still dripping lackadaisical onto the leather beneath you, it was sweltering inside the car. The rain hadn't let up and you were convinced the storm would go on well into the night. Hopefully the cops would need to call off the search momentarily until the rain lets up.

Not that they could see you anyway, according to Winter. You sat soaking in the sounds of the pattering rain on the rooftop of the classic car. It was always a soothing sound. Until you broke the silence again,

"Why are you so sweet on me?" You asked. Winter sighed, his chest heaving slowly as his lungs filled and deflated.

"I remember what it's like to love someone. I can't let them taint you. Can't let them take you away from me too." He said, his eyes having a yearning to them. Something in you knew on this night that there was no going back. No ‘normal’. Just two souls forever plagued by memories of past loved ones. Could it be possible? To love and love another through tragic circumstances? This was familiar. You’d done it recently, fallen in love too quickly and because of a heart that bled for tenderness. Now you have two. Two extraordinary men that loved you with every fiber of the being. Except one, was quickly fading from your memory and blending into the one in front of you.

End Part 6

#steve rogers #james buchanan bucky barnes #Bucky Barnes #through a glass darkly #captain hydra x reader

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altagraye · 10 months

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Love you Chica! Here's to many more fics to come!

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128 notes · View notes

altagraye · 10 months

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The hair! I want to run my fingers through it innocently at first. And then of course I'm imagining Bucky, getting served dinner. And devouring everything he can. 😋😛🥵🥴😵‍💫😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦

"Hold on tight baby girl. It's gonna get wet."

@sebsgirl71479

@imaginedreamwrite

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altagraye · 11 months

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A Captain America: the First Avenger Timeline for Fic Writers

(I’m so sorry I erased the original post I’M SO SORRY! You can read this without the visual aids on AO3.)

March 10, 1917 - James Buchanan Barnes is born, and we were all officially fucked.

July 4, 1918 - Steven Grant Rogers is born, and somewhere in Brooklyn Bucky’s mother wept …

June, 1924 - Steve’s mother is bedridden from illness associated with Tuberculosis.

September, 1930 - 12-year old Steve and 13-year old Bucky meet for the first time in Hell’s Kitchen, where Bucky scares off bullies trying to steal Steve’s money. What were they doing in Hell’s Kitchen? No one knows. Steve tells Bucky he’s been living in the orphanage ‘on 8th’ since his mother’s death. Which is odd since Bucky was apparently at her funeral when they’re both legal adults in a flashback scene from the Winter Soldier. For the purpose of this timeline, info from the movies will take precedent over info from the various tie-ins. Meaning Sarah Rogers is basically Schrödinger’s Ma for the next 6 years.

Keep reading

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altagraye · 11 months

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@imaginedreamwrite , @sebsgirl71479, @sammy-souffle

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altagraye · 1 year

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AltaGraye’s Orcverse guide

A guide to the Orcverse

What is the Orcverse?

Keywords and basic info:

Orcverse

is a type of Monsterfucking fic.

Monsterfucking-

a smutty fic involving a humanoid creature or character that has augmented features resembling that of a monster. Such as, Cephlopod appendages, skin tones seen not in the human world- greenish to grey. Tusks, enlarged genitalia (orc penis), unrealistic muscular standards not seen in human nature. Tall, giant-like physique. Claws, pointed ears, fairy wings.

Orcs:

a type of monster race feared by humans and notorious for brutality and incivility, commonly seen as barbarians and brutes by any other race other than their own (or so the humans think). They have a particular disdain and dislike for the Elven race, due to eons of savage warring between the two factions.

Handfasting:

When an Orc wants to keep his/her mate. Done via a ceremony, usually small scale but publicly. Clansmen are notified to who is bonded (married) as to avoid unnecessary confusion. They typically mate for life.

Bond-breaking:

Not usual, but when an Orc finds extreme dishonesty in their mate (such as they have cheated and mated with another person outside the bond) they are allowed to break their bond with the unfaithful mate.

Courting:

A period of a few weeks (generally 3-5), where a male or female orc exchange gifts. Are taken to private events such as hunting, nightly walks in nature, an Orc will typically gain a ring to place on one of their tusks to show courting starts. Gender is not limited to courting and mating. Races, although rare, are not limited either.

Mate:

An Orc equivalent to a human wife or husband. Mates are together until death. Mates are taken very seriously. Sometimes when Mates die, the surviving mate does not re-mate. Mates can be male or female, and can be human, elf, ogre, fae, or another orc.

Chieftain:

The current leader of the local Orc Tribe. Usually but not limited to the strongest leader of said group.

Clan:

a specific family of Orcs. Such as the Starks, Romanoffs, Wilson's. Usually would have gained notoriety in the Tribe.

Shaman:

A medicine man or woman that takes care of the wounded, women in childlabor, as well as the mentally ill. During orcbirth, the Shaman assists only when approved by the mate who is actively coaching the laboring mate.

“Catching Sickness”:

When a mate of another race is impregnated with an Orcling. There is a week long period of time where the mother is incapacitated. The mothers body is not used to bearing an Orc. And thinks this foreign body as a threat-to-life. During this time it is easy for the mother to miscarry the Orcling. during this time, the father gingerly aids his pregnant mate. No one is allowed to see the mate, unless the Orc approves of it. Typically this is very close friends who want to help and the clan Shaman. Until the Orcling "catches" and is able to survive the sickness, then the rest of the pregnancy resumes as normal until birth.

Symptoms include but are not limited to:

High fever

Reduced appetite

Body aches/pains

The need to have your mate around.

Body shakes

Nightmares

Fatigue

Frequent vomiting and or nausea

Orcling(s):

what Orcs call their offspring. When born Orclings weigh from 8-11.5 pounds. Any weight below 8 pounds is considered a premature orcling.

Halfling(s):

Mixed race orclings, such as half-human, half-fae, half-elf. Half-lings tend to weigh the same size as their full-blooded brethren.

Tribe:

A major group of orcs settled into a particular location. A large encampment of orcs, with various clans of Orcs residing.

Exile:

When a crime has been committed, sometimes a Tribe member is banished from the Tribe.

Bloodsport:

when someone in the clan comics a terrible crime, they must fight to the death against the best fighters in the clan. A punishment worse than exile.

Tusk(s):

Large boar-like teeth on the bottom row of an orcs mouth. One on each side (right & left).

“Orc-drunk”:

When an Orc is aroused (typically in males though does not exclude female Orcs interested in mates) the Orc has the ability to use their saliva as an aphrodisiac, in order to assist with penetration with other races (usually human women). The chemical compounds in the saliva when directly applied to a mate's genitalia help to relax the affected area to ease mating.

Habitats:

Dense Forests, mountain ranges, marshes, Caves, rarely seen- frozen inhabited places or places with year-long Winter seasons. Some Orc tribes have resorted to leading Nomadic lifestyles.

Skills:

blacksmiths, carpenters, hunters, tradesmen, and skilled builders.

Physical attributes:

Female Orcs:

Twice the size of the average human female.

Toned, muscular physique

Skin ranges from various shades of green to almost grey.

Tusk size is much smaller than a male Orc. However, still noticeable.

Breasts are usually smaller, especially in females who have yet to bear an orcling. Warrior-women are also small breasted.

Bond-rings can be displayed on the tusks.

Genitalia is strikingly similar to a human with the exception of a constantly larger clitoris.

Male orcs:

Three times the size of the average human female.

Large muscular build, almost no body fat, with the exception of older orcs. Older orcs typically drink more mead and thus have a noticeable mead-gut.

This is basically a "beer-gut".

Skin color is various shades of green or gray. Rarely blue, this color is seen as a defect.

Genitalia size is on average 7 inches when soft.

Hard length ranges from 8-11 inches.

Girth at the head is typically 2.5 inches but can be bigger.

Girth at the middle and down to the base is usually 3 inches but never exceeds 4 inches.

Tusks start small but grow bigger when the Orc reaches adulthood. Tusks are typically 3-4 inches in height and 2 inches in girth at the base of their mouth.

Bond-rings can be displayed on tusks.

Hierarchy:

Pelts:

Bear pelt, Wolf pelt, tiger pelt. Reserved as a wright of passage for young Orcs- sustained into adulthood. Bigger game is killed and thus worn as the Orc advances into adulthood.

Tusk Ring:

shown for status, reserved for successful warriors. Can be worn by male and female Orcs. Some have One ring on each tusk. This is different than a bond-ring, traditionally called a handfast-ring, which indicates the wearer is mated or seriously courting a mate. The handfast-ring is a different type of metal, to differentiate it from a warriors' ring. The warrior's ring is less flashy and has a more dull tone. Whereas, a bond-ring is typically a bright copper color.

Moral systems:

Not much is known about the Orcs morality. Most feuds are handled on a case to case basis. They have no legal court system, so feuds are quickly handled by the people involved. However if the situation is escalated enough, the chieftain will call for a summons in front of the whole Tribe. Meaning everyone must witness both parties plead their side of the issue, and the chieftain gets to decide the losers punishment. Exile or bloodsport is usually the ending.

Traditions/customs:

During orcling-birth, the male who has sired the orcling has an intense instinct to assist his laboring mate. No other Orcs are allowed to visit the laboring mate. With the exception of a medical Shaman once labor has reached the birthing stage.

@sebsgirl71479 @imaginedreamwrite @giorno-plays-piano

#Orcverse #orcs #monster #monster fudger #orc!bucky #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #sebastian stan roles #mcu fandom #marvel #bucky barnes #bucky headcanon #beefy bucky

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altagraye · 1 year

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All I can think of is bucky and his daughter.

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRc8vsS5/

So metal. Yet so cute.

🤘🤘🦾👏👏

@sebsgirl71479 @imaginedreamwrite

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altagraye · 1 year

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Happenings at Easton High

Excerpt:

Character scent list:

Erin Williams: Strawberry Cake | Designation: Omega

James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes: Cedar Wood & Ocean mist | Designation: Alpha

Steve Rogers: Warm Apple Pie | Designation: Alpha

Natasha Romanoff: Lavender and Orchid | Designation: Alpha

Sam Wilson: Fresh Mint | Designation: Alpha

Supporting Characters:

Wanda Maximoff: Granny Smith Apples & Toasted Macadamia Nuts | Designation: Beta

Pietro Maximoff: Black Tea & Ginger Root | Designation: Alpha

Steven Grant: Raspberry Jam | Designation: Omega

Scott Lang: Key Lime Pie & Cinnamon | Designation: Omega

Sharon Carter: Coconut | Designation: Alpha

Tony Stark: Tequila & Mahogany | Designation: Alpha

Mrs.Williams: Stale Wine & Caviar | Designation: Alpha

Maria Hill: Freshly Baked Bread | Designation: Beta

Fever Dream

Year: 2012, February

Location: Portland, Maine

* this is only a part 1. I'm so tired but I will just post this anyway.

Gym class had gone on without a hitch. Bucky just finished weightlifting and headed for the locker rooms to change. Among the scents of the crowd, waiting to move on to the next class, Bucky knew something was off. Bucky’s nose scrunched into the air, examining the ether for his mate. He could only pick up the faint scent of Strawberry Cake. Erin.

His sweet Omega, the one that made him feel butterflies flutter in his stomach, believe it or not. He’d seen her with her classmates and her assigned gym teacher, Carol Danvers. Bucky was a part of a different class in the gym, so he always cherished when all the gym classes grouped up occasionally. But now, she was gone, only remnants of her scent left in the stale air. True they had only been officially dating for three months, but Bucky would protect her with his life, if he had to.

He knew there was something, more about this girl. Something refreshing and simple, something he wanted to keep around for as long as he could. He never wanted Erin to be ‘the one that got away’. Bucky shook off his nerves and ducked his head down, making sure his scent wasn’t too sweat-leaden. Raking through his long, chin-length hair, he solidified himself. He went over to Natasha, the foreign exchange student from Russia. She was a girl in the same class as Erin. She was an Alpha too. One that Erin seemed to build a quick friendship with since moving to Portland.

“Hey, Nat. Um. Have you seen Erin around? I thought she was with you?” Bucky asked quizzically.

Natasha lifted her head from her bag, one that she routinely checked on, making sure she was as prepared as possible. Nat straightened up the tie on her backpack and closed its top flap, pushing her hair out her face with a swipe of her finger.

“I saw her talking to Coach Danvers about midway through our track jog. I figured it was her asthma bothering her again. Probably the winter air, y’know? Go ask Coach, she’ll let you see her in the infirmary.” Nat slung her bag across her back, giving Bucky a warm smile.

Bucky returned the favor, “Thanks, Nat.” and walked in the direction of Coach Danvers. Who the Hell says infirmary anymore? Thought, Bucky realized the strange way Natasha used her words. That thought quickly dissipated in his mind, as he put his utmost important focus to the forefront. His stomach sunk at the news that Erin might be in pain. His Omega out there, struggling to breathe, without him? He couldn’t fathom something worse.

He cursed himself, how did he not notice sooner?! He could have taken her to the nurses’ office himself. Bucky’s instinct was in full swing. The need to be by Erin’s side only intensified as he got closer to Coach Danvers, chatting up another gym teacher. Bucky swallowed his nerves, he couldn’t act stressed out in front of adults.

“Coach Danvers?” he asked, looking forward.

“What’s up?” She responded, her line of vision tearing away from her co-worker.

“Is Erin alright? I heard you sent her to the nurses office.” Bucky stared into the Coaches eyes, carefully looking for any sign of fabrication.

“Oh. Williams, the new girl. Yeah. She ran out of scent block spray and her heat came on out of the blue. It’s better on everyone if her mom takes her home. Nothing more hectic than a school full of horny Alphas and a heated Omega. You can try talking to the nurse. But I dunno if she’ll let you go back to see her.” Coach Danvers warned.

Bucky got the urge to run, every second he wasted spending time here was another he wasn’t helping Erin. Bucky turned to leave forgetting his manners.

"Hey, I don't want to hear any funny business going on. Or you'll answer to me. You understand?!" Coach Danvers semi-yelled out to Bucky, turning to face her but keeping his mind on his Omega.

"Loud 'n' clear, Coach! Thank you." Bucky concluded heading out the heavy double doors.

It was no surprise to Bucky that as he got closer to the nurses’ office, that he couldn’t smell Erin’s scent. It would be concealed as best as possible until her parent came to pick her up. Bucky knew there were two isolated rooms built to hold Omegas who were in heat, granted the emergency situation.

These Heat-Rooms were tough. Made to make Fort Knox look like a joke. To keep Alphas out and Omegas protected at all costs. Any visitor who enters must first be neutralized with scent spray. Betas are typically fine though, being that Betas usually emit a calming scent to both Omegas and Alphas.

Bucky reached the front desk in record time, stopping to catch his breath. The nurse, Maria Hill, was diligently typing away at her computer. Her scent combined with her cool demeanor working to calm the frantic Alpha down. So far it was working ever so slightly. But it wouldn’t make Bucky’s worry go away.

“What can I do for you, Bucky?” Hill asked, finally stopping her work and giving the Alpha her full attention. Bucky was no stranger to the nurses’ office. Having to go there himself to get patched up after rough hockey matches with Sam was a regular occurrence.

“Erin’s in there. I want to make sure she’s alright. Just til her mom comes and picks her up.” Bucky said, unable to keep his gaze away from the heavy steeled door.

“No one’s making pups on my campus. Not on my watch. Sorry to burst your bubble Bucket.” Maria stated, getting up to file some paperwork away. Bucky let his head hit his hand on the counter with a soft thud.

“That’s not, it at all. I’ll leave as soon as her mom loads her in the car. Hell, I'll load her in myself if she can’t walk. Please, Hill? We’re Courting.” Bucky pleaded. He wasn’t used to pleading, so he mentally crossed his fingers hoping this would be enough to convince her. Maria’s eyebrows raised from her eyes, shocked at what he was saying. The desperation in his voice told her he was telling the truth. But she still couldn’t believe it.

“You? Courting, her? I thought you were into the more spunky Omegas.” Hill shook her head in disbelief. She’s probably the only person in the whole school who doesn’t know Erin and I are Courting, Bucky thought, rolling his eyes a bit.

“Yeah I get that a lot.Can you let me in? I don’t care if you keep tabs on me. Please. She’s in pain. And you can’t give her any pain meds unless a legal guardian signed off on it. And I bet it’s blank, right?” Bucky straightened up his spine. He didn’t want to leave here without at least checking on Erin. Bucky knew Erin couldn’t get as little as Ibuprofen for a headache. Much less given pain killers for her heat.

Maria chewed on her lower lip. Knowing that the only thing that might give Erin relief is her Alphas’ scent. She raked a hand through her hair.

“Alright Barnes. I’ll let you in. but you better behave yourself.” Hill gave him a stern index finger. Bucky clapped his hands together and bowed his head. Relief wasn’t a strong enough word for the emotion he was feeling.

“Thank you, thank you! I promise. No dickin’ around.” Bucky nearly exclaimed in joy.

Erin:

Ms. Hill was nice enough to give me a weighted blanket, and to keep the overhead fan on. But my heat was gnawing at me, slow and vicious. I kept my eyes closed, the lights beating a headache into my skull. That wasn’t the heat talking. Something I don’t like talking about. If Bucky knew about it, what’d he think about me? Would he disown me? Dump me? Never want to be associated with me ever again? Probably.

The kind nurse gave me multiple pillows, one of which I used to block out the light. I often felt like I was floating on my heats. At least not when a cramp had me in its jaws. Then I would come crashing back to earth until the pain subsided. Mom denies I have strong heats. Only because Dad never had strong heats, and he didn’t have debilitating cramps, like I do. I often wonder if the reasoning is because of my secret. Am I just too… sensitive? Just like with my emotions? The constant Ping-Ponging between feeling overly happy, to deep dark depressions, and enormous tidal waves of sadness that wash over me.

I’m nuts. I’m fucking nuts. A teenage girl who is so afraid of the dark, she has mental breakdowns. I can’t tell if I’m going crazy from just being me or if it’s the emotional abuse. Sometimes, if I didn't behave, Mom was mean to me. All through middle school and to now. Maybe it won’t end? Maybe I just need to be on my best behavior? Maybe by the time we graduate, Bucky can claim me. So Rapunzel won’t have to live in the tower anymore? Nah, that’s just a dumb fever dream. That’s the heat talking.

“Erin? You have a visitor.” a soft voice said, Ms. Hill. Oh no. I don't want to leave. I don’t want to go home, not yet. I groaned into my pillow. Curling into myself, half from a cramp and half from wishing I didn't leave so soon. But if I don't comply, then tonight will just be another argument.

I heard her pull up a chair. I know what she’s gonna say. ‘I took off work from a very important meeting to be here.’ Right, because I'm always the problem. If I’m such a burden then, why did you even have me in the first place?!

“Omega?” a voice asked with trepidation. My breath hitched and my heart skipped a beat. It wasn’t Mother Gothel after all. I removed the pillow from over my head, thinking it was very possible that I was just imagining all this. What a horrible trick resulting from a heat haze. But instead I was met with a soft smile and a heaping whiff of Cedarwood laced with hints of Ocean mist.

“Bucky? Why are you here?” my entire body shuddered as the heat fevers were beginning to kick in. Bucky chuckled a bit.

"I noticed you'd left. Talked to Coach Danvers and once I heard you were in heat. I- I couldn't just leave you to your misery. It's okay babe. I'm here now." Bucky said, his features softening. Bucky wiped sweat from my brow and gingerly stroked my warm cheek with his thumb.

I couldn't help but mewl at his tender touch. There was nothing like it. It was so sweet to have someone who cared for me like this. What's Bucky gonna think when I tell him about Mom? I trust him, but I feel like he might get too involved. And that would only make my situation more complicated.

Ms. Hill wandered about the room, giving me a water bottle and checking my temperature. I noticed she was assessing how Bucky was with me. Cautious as she should be, Alphas that are students are not allowed in the Heat Rooms when an Omega is present. She’s breaking the rules. Something I wouldn't be confident to do myself. She smiled and opened the door to leave.

“If either of you love birds need anything, I'll be just outside. I hope you feel better sweetie.” Ms. Hill expressed her sympathies. I could only give her a curt nod, feeling the beginnings of another cramp gripping my insides. I grasped at the thin cotton bedsheets, my teeth grinding in an effort to conceal a pain filled outburst.

Bucky noticed my pain immediately and dragged my hand to his lips, leaving soft kisses to distract me for the time being. When the wave subsided, I opened my eyes again, staring back at my lover's face. It was killing him to see me like this.

His brows furrowed and his face fallen he asked, “Is it always like this for you?”

I nodded, “mmhmm. Every month since I was 9.”

Bucky’s eyes widened at my response, “You were 9 when your heat started?! That’s crazy! Shit. I’m sorry Baby. You know, I would take your pain away if I could. Is my scent okay? I heard sometimes an Alpha’s scent can help the cramps.”

I nodded again. “Yeah your scent always smells so good. And I think it is helping. But i’m just a wuss anyway."

Bucky growled a bit. "Don't put yourself down like that. Heats are tough. Hell, ruts are tough. I can't imagine what you're going through. I mean… I can. I just. I wanna help you." His hand went to the back of his neck, I noticed. He was getting bashful. I smiled weakly.

"Thank you, Buck." I replied. With some struggle I forced my torso up. I always hated getting that cottonmouth feeling during my heats. Bucky followed my every move. I sipped the water before taking a few big gulps. Hopefully this won't make me nauseous.

The bell rang, normally I would be making my way to 3rd period. English 2 class. I looked to his perfectly blue eyes.

"You don't have to miss class for me." I said.

"That doesn't matter to me. You're more important. And agriculture class is boring as shit anyway." He made me chuckle.

"Whatever floats your boat, Billy goat!" I laughed at my own cheesy joke. I saw a brightness come back to Bucky's features. He gave a light chuckle before landing another kiss on the back of my hand.

"Jeez. What am I gonna do with you?" He asked rhetorically.