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One Thing Leads To Another
The networking event at Smoky’s Bar and Grill wasn’t so much built around networking as much as it was drinking and eating with a group of really cool strangers. In other words there were no motives other than to have a good time and meet new people. That suited Kevin just fine. He’d almost loathed words like “networking” and “schmoozing” anyhow.
Like the others, he was a graduate from University of Michigan. Like the others, he was now trying to wade his way through the industry waters of Los Angeles without drowning. His ultimate goal was to direct feature films, but for now he’d take whatever came his way.
He found refuge in the crowded room with his fellow alumni, who demonstrated none of those nasty cliches he’d come to identify with Hollywood types. First he met Patti. She was two years older than him and a personal assistant for a creative executive at Warner Brothers. She told Kevin a few horror stories, but the conversation drifted toward life and art in general. Did he miss Michigan? What were his favorite movies? If he could cast one lead actor and actress in a film, who would it be? He discovered that Patti wanted to produce. They clinked glasses and added each other to their phones. He’d already forgotten he was there to “network”.
Next he met Dante. Dante graduated just this year, which made him a year younger than Kevin. Dante’s goals were in the music industry. It was Dante’s dream to record a song with Frank Ocean one day. Kevin loved Frank Ocean. Dante shared a few of his own songs off his website and it became quickly obvious there was genuine talent on display.
Then there was Beth, who Kevin actually remembered from college. She was his age and pursuing screenwriting while waiting tables at a restaurant in Santa Monica. And there was Boris, who’d graduated Michigan four years ago as part of an exchange program with Russia. Boris was a computer wizard working for the Geek Squad at Best Buy, though like the others he wanted to break into the film industry as an editor.
Kevin shook more hands and added more names to his phone. He added Greta, who was interested in sound design and currently working at a bank. He added Walter, a gaffer who was still waiting for his union card.
Not once did Kevin add a friend to his phone because it felt like an obligation or a career opportunity. He added them because within hours they had actually become his friends. He wanted to see everyone again regardless of whether they could help him achieve his dreams.
Opportunity Strikes Anyway
See them again he did. For the next month the seven of them grabbed drinks on the weekends, took a day trip to Santa Barbara together, posted comments and pictures on each other’s Facebook walls.
It was exactly two months later that Beth posted the comment on Kevin’s Facebook wall: Let’s make a movie. Apparently, her roommate owned an expensive digital camera that he said they could use. She had a script she’d been working on for two years that was nearing its final stages.
Kevin scrolled through his phone of recently acquired contacts, though “contacts” was too harsh a word to describe people who had become close friends. In perusing the list, he saw a musician, an editor, a sound design specialist, a gaffer, a producer, and a screenwriter. Then there was Kevin himself: a director.
It didn’t take long for everyone to jump on board. Patti even promised them some funding through various wealthy alumni she’d met at previous get togethers. Within a week’s time a genuine independent film was coming together.
Kevin wondered: was this the beginning of a new beginning? Answering his own query he posted on his Facebook wall: It’s on.
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The Screening Process
Sarah was twenty-six, brunette and beautiful. And she was, without a doubt, a social butterfly. A social media butterfly too. Rarely was there a time of day or night where she wasn’t flapping her metaphorical wings in any given corner of San Diego. Her phone was a non-stop symphony of notifications and vibrations. Her Facebook friend list was nearing capacity.
Whether she was giving her phone number to the hot fireman she kept seeing at the gym, updating Twitter while ordering snacks at the bar for her girlfriends, adding the stand-up comedian she met in the produce aisle to her Facebook page, or sharing recipes on Pinterest, it seemed Sarah was perpetually engaged in some form of communication with the world.
The Facebook Buffer Zone
“I’m actually quite regimented about the social experience,” Sarah explained to her new friend Chelsea, who she met just three nights ago at a fundraiser.
They were sipping their favorite brews at two-for-one happy hour and Cantina Rica. The after-work crowd was still piling in. Sarah’s peripheral vision was glued to the door as always, since she felt that every new contact was a new experience, a new adventure. Who would make her laugh tonight? Who would be posting pictures on her Wall tomorrow?
Chelsea replied, “What do you mean regimented?”
Sarah took an extra pause as a trio of young men ushered through the door. She’d be keeping an eye on the tall dark one in the middle. Turning her attention back to Chelsea, Sarah explained, “Well, take you for example. When I met you at the fundraiser I knew right away you were trustworthy. I didn’t feel the need to screen you.”
“Screen me?”
“Yeah. I gave you my number right away. If I wanted to screen you, I’d either get your email address or add you to my Facebook page. Then if after a week or two it seemed like you were the real deal, I’d reach out to you for drinks and maybe give you my phone number.”
“I’m honored,” Chelsea joked.
“You should be!” Sarah joked back. “Knowing me is like knowing half of San Diego.”
“So who gets screened?”
“Guys, mostly. Too many crazies out there. Can’t trust them. So if one of them is coming on a little too strong, or dropping hints that he’s only interested in one thing, I friend him on Facebook and we take it from there. The shallow ones usually stop communicating after a few days. That’s when they disappear from my friend list.”
“You de-friend them?”
“Hey, I only have five thousand friends to work with here.”
“What about the guys you keep?” asked Chelsea.
“The cool ones stay on your radar. They post funny things on your wall. They follow you on Twitter. They send you messages or instant messages every now and then to let you know they’re still thinking about you.”
“And what kind of guy do you give your number to right away?”
“The guys where you just know,” said Sarah.
“Just know what?”
“Just know that they were raised well, that they have insight into things. That no matter what happens you’ll have a good time and not have to worry about him stalking you or crushing your heart like it was his plan all along.”
“But how do you know?” asked Chelsea again.
“You just do.”
Will Our Tall Dark Man Make It Past Her Wall?
Sarah turned to discover that the guy she’d noticed earlier was suddenly standing beside her. He smiled. She smiled back. She noticed his recently combed brown hair. His eyes were brown globes brimming with excitement. He was wearing a button down shirt, and she could detect well-toned arms just beneath the wrinkle-free cotton sleeves.
“Hi there,” he said.
“Hello.”
“I haven’t been able to look away from you since I came in,” he confessed. “I’d love to buy you a drink. And…” he added with an artful grin, “I’m not leaving without your number.”
Sarah and Chelsea exchanged a look. He was hot--there was no doubt about that. But was he worthy of her phone number just yet?
“Have a seat,” said Sarah. The screening process had begun.
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Deal-making and the art of seduction
In both the personal and professional world, deals are made every day. A relationship. A marriage. A merger. A loan. A record label signing the latest band. Take any one of these unions and you’ll soon see that at their core they share the same goals: mutual benefit.
All deals require getting into bed (either literally or metaphorically). All partnerships require some degree of compromise. Some business partnerships, like some relationships, are created without mutual consent—one company comes in and simply buys out another and now the remaining employees must work extra hard to keep the “marriage” afloat.
However, the majority of both creative and business partnerships are born out of an attraction between two individuals or companies, the pairing of which will ideally result in both parties mutually benefiting financially. And as with any start-up relationship, the courting ritual plays itself out in a series of dates where the two parties test the waters to see if the relationship will work. Dinners. Boardroom meetings. Golf retreats. If it looks like a partnership that will stick, the two businesses sign contracts (i.e. get married) and start making money (i.e. mutual benefit).
Now let’s say a company wants to build a relationship with a billionaire investor. This company needs the money and it knows that a deal with the investor will result in substantial profit. Is it that different than a young guy who has his sights set on the girl of his dreams? Not really. And just like our young romantic who’s one in a long line of prospective suitors, the representative for our company needs to bring his or her “A” game and standout or else he or she will undoubtedly get lost in the shuffle. A little seduction is required. The question arises: how does he get he get the girl without resorting to mere deceit and trickery?
The answer: it’s all in the details. Show the investor you’re paying attention to all the pertinent information that passes through your radar. A successful investor hears nothing but pitches all day long. He or she is looking for that extra “umph” factor, and that “umph” might not be coming from the business pitch, rather the person pitching it. He or she is looking for someone with a motivated grasp on the world and an acute attention to detail because someone with those assets assuredly has good business sense too.
Flattery can get you everywhere, they say, and it might be true. Sincerity is equally as important, however, because blatant schmoozing will come off as such. It’s in the details and the passion with which you handle those details that can make or break any relationship. If you’re trying to get that investor into (metaphorical) bed, telling him or her that you can offer the opportunity of a lifetime is equivalent to telling your date that her eyes are pretty and then checking your iPhone to see who’s posting random pictures on your Facebook wall.
But telling that investor they’ll love your product because it caters to a demographic near and dear to his or her heart shows you've done your homework and that you truly believe in like causes. After all, having things in common is the foundation of any enduring relationship. Humans want to know that the people they’re bonding with are actually listening.
So when you take this investor out to dinner you should be remembering the little things. What are your investor’s favorite movies? What are his or her favorite social media outlets? Maybe the he or she has a favorite salad and he or she always gets it a certain way. Maybe he or she loves horseback riding and has a daughter in grade school. Heck, maybe he or she likes nothing more than a glass of 12-year scotch at the end of the day.
And you know what you get that investor as a thank-you gift for meeting with you? A bottle of the finest 12-year scotch you can find. You know why? Because it shows you’re paying attention. It very well might be the start of a beautiful relationship.
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Navigating The Jungle Of Communication
“It’s a jungle out there, disorder and confusion everywhere." So sings Randy Newman in the theme song to the TV show Monk. And he’s not far from the truth. It is a jungle out there, filled with every sort of animal you can think of, each one with his or her own way of surviving and getting ahead.
Whether it’s corporate sharks, pack rats, leeches, lone tigers or lion kings, every business environment is a diverse, unpredictable terrain that needs to be navigated properly in order to yield success. In spite of what your college economics professor might have told you, at the end of the day there are no set rules to move forward in such a world. Even hard work doesn't always pay off. In fact, to truly rise in business there are two things you must possess that no teacher in the world can bestow upon you: basic instinct and knowing the right people. Laws of the jungle, indeed.
Instinct can’t be learned. It can only be improved upon. Nobody plucked Warren Buffet off the street and turned him into the investor he is today, but someone probably honed his skill set. And Warren Buffet might be the first to tell you that talent is nurtured, not created. In Wall Street, whenGordon Gecko points to a homeless man and then a businessman and asks if Bud Fox really thinks the difference between them is luck, his message is clear: luck has nothing to do with it.
So it goes for the second law of the jungle—contacts. If you’re out there alone with no support system, eventually you’ll be eaten by a shark (like Gordon Gecko) or a tiger or even a jackal who just got lucky and caught you off guard (aka sold you a bad deal and took off for Cancun). A proper group of people you can utilize will make the difference in such a world. After all, there’s no such thing as individual success, but rather a series of powerful connections that eventually pushes one person to the top of the pile. Shake hands with any powerful figure in the world and you’re shaking a hand that shook many hands. A President. A CEO. An Oscar winning actor. At some point in his or her career he or she relied on networking to get ahead, plain and simple. The expression “it’s all about who you know” didn't come from nowhere.
However, like all things networking can’t be learned as much as it can be improved upon. Take a savvy extrovert and teach him some new tricks you didn't necessarily make a strong businessman, you made a businessman stronger. Nowadays, even a strong businessman needs a little help getting ahead as networking itself has evolved into a global enterprise that moves by faster than a stock ticker.
Times have changed since Gordon Gecko’s heyday. For starters, they made a sequel to Wall Street that didn't hold a match to the original. Furthermore, networking has become an infinitely more complicated “jungle” unto itself. Two decades ago, a deal could be made with a business card and a three-martini lunch. Now, networking is a head-spinning foray into cyberspace that could tailspin out of control if you don’t get a handle on it.
One contact has become ten. One individual no longer represents just a small company, but a virtually endless number of “friends” or online contacts, all of whom might have something to offer and all of whom want a slice of the pie for themselves. The question becomes: how does an aspiring capitalist keep his head above water (or navigate through the jungle) when the scope of networking has no boundaries?
The answer: CliffsNotes. Memory cues. Phone apps. Because no longer do you need to remember just a face and the name of that great steakhouse where you talked mergers. Now you need to remember a face, the name of the steakhouse, the online site that connected you, who your mutual acquaintances are, which method of communication he or she prefers, his or her email address, his or her website, his or her likes and dislikes, and most importantly, his or her professional goals in both the urban jungle and the online jungle. That’s a lot of networking, and a lot of navigating. Use all the tools you can to find your way through the brush.
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Why Our Brain Remembers Attractive People
Are you one of those people who tend to apologize for not being able to remember someone’s name after you met them once?
It’s time to give yourself a break, because neuroscience has proven that you aren’t physiologically built to remember a snippet of information like a name or a phone number without a little something extra.
John Guzowski, professor of neurobiology at the University of California Irvine, recently published a study on the way that an area of the brain called the hippocampus is critical to the formation of our memories. This is where all the information we are gathering through our nervous system (through senses like sight, sound, smell, etc) is being processed as spatial and contextual information and being turned into a kind of memory map.
When we have a new experience, what we remember is the milieu, the associations and the emotional impact of it. One common technique for remembering names relies on this. Let’s say you meet someone named Frank Arrington; take a moment to picture a frankfurter flying through the air and then through a ring that weighs one ton. The goofiness of the image activates an emotional pathway while the common items featured in it bring along a rich source of associations. Now the meeting has context in a social environment and voila! The name is stored in a way that is easier to retrieve the next time you see your new acquaintance.
The science of obsession
While Guzowski is pursuing the neuroscience of memory, Michael Platt, Director of the Duke Center for Cognitive Neuroscience, studies the neural basis of our social behavior. He has stirred up controversy for his work on celebrity obsession. He poses an interesting question: why are we able to remember vast stores of useless information on celebrities, but not the important business contact we made recently who could bring us a lot of lucrative clients? He determined that we are neurologically designed to focus on what is sensually appealing. In one of Platt's studies, monkeys were willing to forego rewards like food in order to look at pictures of sexually desirable monkeys. I mean who wouldn't, right?
Actually, here’s the cool part. His study was replicated with undergraduates at Duke University, where perfectly reasonable people turned away money to look at pictures of people they found attractive. From this and other research, Platt has concluded that social information on what our nervous system determines are “beautiful people” is more valuable to us than other resources, and our brains retain the data they identify as more rewarding.
After a few million years of evolution, we've finally come up with a tool to help us sort information about the people we meet the way the brain wants to remember it. Our CrumbTrail app helps you capture the context in which you met someone (such as the place, the time, etc.). Semantic networking combines the best of technology with the power of your own neural net. Now you can access exactly why you wanted to keep this contact information by building a touchstone that brings that meeting back to life in your mind. Like an extension of the brain, CrumbTrail lets you remember who you meet the same way your brain naturally wants to do it; only better.
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Do you have an iPhone and meet a lot of new people? We need you.
We've been working hard for months now to get this far down the path, and the time has finally come. We're ready to find the right Beta testers for the CrumbTrail app. Think you might be interested? We want to hear from you if: You have lots of contacts and would love to find a better way to manage them. You love trying out cool new apps. You'd love to get a free copy of the app and all future updates once it's ready to launch. You own any of the following: iPod, iPod Touch 2nd Gen and 4th Gen, and iPhone 3G, 3GS, 4, 4S and 5. If these criteria apply to you, please contact us through our sign-up form, and add a note about how you found out about our app. We know you're out there. And we're really looking forward to working with you.
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CrumbTrail Teaser Video
If you've been following our blog or social media profiles, you have probably figured out that CrumbTrail is not destined to be just another contact management app. Yes, you will be able to manage your contacts and a whole lot more, but the concept goes way beyond the recording who you know in order to facilitate the growth of your connections in a more natural, organic way.
As the need to store more information has increased, we use whatever we can to organize and quickly access the data that's important to us. It's time to zoom past the days of traditional alphabetical methods of keeping track of the people we've met. Address books, sticky notes, business card files and out-dated software make it too easy for important information to get lost in a sea of names and numbers without faces or meaning.
Our senses trigger vivid memories. Sights, sounds, conversations, and places we have visited are all examples of things that our brain uses to help us retain information. Don't you think it's time your contacts are allowed the same opportunity? Don't you think it's time for the technology you are using to be better aligned with how your brain actually functions?
Take a look at our new teaser video, where we share the issues our app is looking to solve and how CrumbTrail aims to make your connections more worthwhile and easier to manage. We're excited to bring such a revolutionary app to you, and can't wait to get it into your hands.
Check out the transcript for our video below, and feel free to leave your comments and thoughts on this page!
Video Transcript:
Our relationships are built on memory, yet sometimes our minds can be forgetful. Since the beginning of time, the way we communicate has been an evolving process, soaring over great distances. As our technology advances we find new ways to use it, as well as how to make it better. Yet as we push forward, our go-to sources for obtaining and maintaining contacts has yet to evolve. The way we remember people, where we met them, how we are connected, the things that make them unique; it's just not how technology works. Remembering the people you meet has become a multi-platform, multi-app web of frustration. With the amount of time we spend on our phones, we need a better way to navigate our lives.
Our world is getting smaller, cause we are getting smarter.
CrumbTrail: How you know, who you know.
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Are you influential?
A lot of companies keep their eyes on what they refer to as "influencers" or "super connectors". If you have a powerful network with a lot of friends and contacts, that's worth something. However, it's not all just who you know that matters, it's also what you can bring to the table. What you know matters, too.
Knowing that the influencers can make or break a business based on favorable or unfavorable reviews, some of the biggest companies in the world are now seeking and using social influencers to help them promote their products. The math is simple: instead of (hypothetically speaking) trying to get 1000 people interested in their business, they can get 10 influencers who each have a network of 100 people who trust them to promote it for them. Disney recently ran a promotion to give some of their loyal fans tickets and merchandise for a new movie release. American Express offers gift cards and Windows gave some of their community members the new Mobile OS phone. Chevy handed a few lucky influencers the keys to a brand new Chevrolet Volt for a three-day weekend.
Why would they do this? Feedback. Word-of-mouth referrals have long been the key to successful enterprises, even before the rush of social media became a big hit. From solo-preneurs to mom-and-pop businesses to giant conglomerates, any smart business knows the value of good 'ol fashioned word-of-mouth. Add the multiplying effect of social media and before you know it, scores of people online have heard about your product, service or invention.
Some influencers get formal invitations as "brand ambassadors" and get invited to special events. If rubbing elbows with band members, models or actors and getting VIP passes sounds interesting to you, well... all you have to do is be prominent online.
Some tools like Klout have taken it a step further to categorize people based on participatory levels, consistency and focus. Their popular matrix includes categories such as: curators, syndicators or broadcasters (those who share content); taste-makers, thought leaders (those who create original content); observers, conversationalists ( those more focused on listening as opposed to participating); specialists and activitists (those focused on tighter niche focus). Have you ever thought about what bracket you're falling into?
How to gain online social popularity
The first thing to do would be to find a niche that you want to be prominent in: tech, video gaming, writing, crafting, scuba diving, what have you. It does take quite a lot of effort to build your network. You have to blog about topics that people are interested in, devote your time to develop insights, and constantly worry about nurturing your network. If you just write about a bunch of random stuff, it may not generate the results you seek.
With this in mind, you can move forward with more caution in what you choose to share or not share with your social circles. Always maintain authenticity. Don't promote capricious products you're not familiar with or care about. Most importantly, keep your communications positive and shy away from anything offensive that could come back to haunt you later on.
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Leveraging the Six Degrees of Separation
Here's something you may not already know. The theory of six degrees of separation is one that was proposed in 1929 by a Hungarian writer. In a nutshell, it suggests that we are all connected to any one other person in the entire world by a chain of people we know, with at most five people in between them. Let's explore this possibility to see how you might know every celebrity, with at least five intermediaries.
You have a neighbor who is originally from Canada. (That's #1) His family owns a sign company and his mother is friends with another woman . That third woman is a teacher at the university. One of her students was a childhood friend of Angelina Jolie, the famous actress . That's five people between you and Angelina Jolie. You are #6, or #1, depending on whether you look at it from the front to the back or vice versa.
Although this is just one hypothetical example among thousands that could be presented, the theory is certainly fascinating. We can never know if we truly have five people between knowing someone famous, unless we dig deep to explore the possibilities. In fact, living amidst an era of technology and social media, it's possible that our degrees of separation may even be less than six.
Leverage connections by identifying common friends
With tools in place on many of the bigger social networks, apps and communities online, you now have more power than ever to meet someone that could benefit you professionally. There's a "People You Might Know" box on LinkedIn; or "You Might Also Want to Follow" on Twitter. These tools help to identify common friends and decrease the assumptive six degrees of separation between you and them. This allows you to spot people with whom you share like-minded hobbies, talents, skills, or anything that can greatly enhance your connections.
But how? Just knowing someone isn't really enough, unless you leverage those connections by reaching out to them. Give out a shout or write a personal note to someone if you're looking for something specific. For example, let's say you have a friend (of a friend) who is a fantastic graphic designer. You happen to be looking for revamping your personal website. Rather than advertising the job and starting to filter designers from scratch, you can ask to be introduced to that person through your friend.
This strategy can also work to get introductions, references or to make new friendships. Reinforcing relationships with your existing connections over time can only make them stronger. People like to do business with someone they know, and like. By communicating and reaching out to them, you are initiating a relationship. You will no longer be strangers. These can only lead to more opportunities, job offers, reviews, or whatever you need to strengthen your personal, academic or professional life. Networking is crucial for building connections and for eventually getting great opportunities.
How to increase your 'Power of Six'
One tip to using the six degrees of separation to your advantage is to be willing to give back. If you're asking to be introduced to someone, offer something in return. A lot of authors share reviews with each other to help build credibility on their work. A lot of business people share ideas or connections with each other to make introductions less awkward. The power of six is even more powerful than ever because of the online opportunities that are far reaching and plentiful. Just make sure your requests are not always one-sided.
On that note, when you offer to help someone you meet, it's best not to expect anything in return. In my experience, unselfish giving has always led to many more benefits than anything I've asked for. But don't be afraid to ask when you see someone in your network that might be able to help you, too.
At its very essence, these social media opportunities and communities are there to build relationships, rapport and to help people from around the globe to connect with each other and build camaraderie.
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The Power of Niche Networking
You already know about the value of networking. One minute you could be sitting at your favorite Java hut, drinking a cup of steamy fresh coffee, when suddenly you strike up a conversation with someone sitting near you. Turns out, they work for a company you've heard of and you have a common friend. Meeting someone face-to-face gives you an extra boost in your networking cliques. If you swap information and stay in touch, these random connections can become even more important than you realize.
That one person that you met might know another, who knows another; and so forth. Before you know it, your coffee excursion could lead to a new position at your dream company, or an otherwise interesting endeavor. But in order to get there, you shouldn't be afraid of putting yourself out there, both online and offline.
We've all heard countless examples of how one random discussion turned into a side project which eventually resulted in the creation of a million-dollar idea. Some started in their small garage and then landed in Fortune 500 or Entrepreneur Magazine. Almost all of these successes were based on meeting the right people at the right time.
We now have platforms dedicated to funding ideas, where people can come together to show patronage and support. Gamers, authors, inventors, holistic specialists, and college students all have a leveled playing field.
Offline communities are also on the rise. For example, let's say you like tinkering with electronics and materials to make pieces of art when you're bored. None of your friends like industrial design or crafts and could care less to try it. You can still signup for a HackerSpace in your area to use their space and equipment for your projects, and more importantly to meet other people with similar interests.
People are usually involved with different types of circles and networks, instead of being bound by one. You can have one network just for your video gaming buddies, another for your biking companions, and yet another for your nightlife and partying. Whether or not you meet these new friends in person is moot point. Even if you don't meet someone physically, you can totally interact as much or as little as you choose.
Many of these niche-related communities go beyond just the typical Twitter, Facebook and larger social networks. Instead of being wide and shallow, they are narrow and deep, thus allowing you to learn from each other and feel more at home. Because of this niche-focus, new apps are launched every day, giving people a chance to play together, do business together, find jobs, take classes, get rides, or truly everything imaginable. Yet, this sea of networking must be sorted smartly, so we can have more control over our social lives.
From wine to widgets... take your life to the next level of fun, success and happiness among like-minds!
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The Importance of Contact Segregation
Phonebooks should be designed around how people behave naturally in their day-to-day interactions.
Apple's new phone-book allows you to unwittingly import all of your Facebook contacts:
There's one big beef that people who upgraded or purchased a new iPhone 5 have discovered. If you link the new iPhone 5 to your Facebook profile, it uploads ALL of your Facebook contacts into your phone-book.
Well, technically it's something users DO have control over. However, many don't realize until it's too late just how much of a headache and inconvenience it will become.
Good design isn't about giving people the option of overwhelming themselves, good design is helping to ensure that that doesn't happen.
Why is this a problem?
Imagine you are someone who uses Facebook to keep in touch with people, but you have a lot of "acquaintance" type friends over there as well. That includes old friends from grade school, friends of mutual friends, some people who you've never even met in real life and others who you have on your friends tally as a courtesy. Now, they're all in your phonebook. So, when you try to scroll through this extensive thousand+ person long list, it can be quite daunting.
In fact, the latest chatter on Twitter suggests that most people are baffled by it. See the screenshot below from yesterday.
A different perspective on contact management:
We remember people based on various factors: Where did we meet them? How well do we know them? Are we close? There is a lot of valuable contextual information around each of our contacts. Based on that contextual information, WE decide how best to connect with them.
I have a doctor friend who prefers to be contacted by texting. Yet another friend only responds if I call him directly. Then another acquaintance likes to chat or send private messages through Facebook. And I have a client who prefers Skype calls. The fascinating thing is that I don't have to remember this. It is all instinctive for me. If I have to get in touch with a specific person, I know exactly what channel, medium or mode to use. This segregation of channels is very crucial for me to be able to operate effectively.
The problem with contact management tools and current-age phone books is that they haven't evolved over time to meet this basic human need.
They force us to bundle people together in one chunk, and sift through them alphabetically. This takes away our ability to segment our contacts based on context or platform, and makes it less intuitive and more chaotic to manage.
Technology is (and should be) about making our life easier.
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The Deception of First Impressions
People say that first impressions are critical in establishing the perception of a person or thing from the very instant of meeting. But are they, really? I think first impressions can sometimes be dishonest, in a way. People are always on their best behavior when they are first introduced to someone new. And new products are like shiny, star-spangled gizmos that we can’t wait to get our hands on. As soon as one product is introduced, it becomes seemingly obsolete by the next season. Whenever a new model hits the market, it’s sure to be even better and more spectacular than its predecessor.
My first impression is… let’s wait and see.
I’m not the type to hold a candle to first impressions. It is kind of like a first date. Both people are doing their best to impress the person sitting across from them. They brag about accomplishments, wear their finest clothes, fix up to look pretty, and maybe even squirt on just a smidge of something that smells wonderfully delicious. Just like a shiny new product that has been recently introduced to the public, people look their best when they go on a first date.
It’s much later on when you see them in their casual T-shirts or nerdy glasses, that they leave a more indelible impression on you. This is the part of them that you might grow to love and respect much more than their initial glass-like persona. Or, you’d even be surprised to find out that they are always looking topnotch, keeping you in a state of “constant awe”.
This is why I prefer to make assumptions about a person after interacting with them a few times. Will they still wear their best clothes and sound as good as they did upon that first encounter? Will that shiny new gizmo still work as good as new after using it for a few weeks or months?
The importance of long-term impressions.
It’s important to be genuine when you’re meeting new people. In this way, it’s easier to maintain the initial persona and image that attracted them to you in the first place.
First impressions only weaken when the initial interaction turns out to be disingenuous, and this is when things can go awry.
Let’s say, for example, that you just graduated from college. You’re hot-to-trot and ready to embark upon a new career within the field of your chosen profession. You've put in your hard work, years of studying and due diligence and finally made it. Then you apply for forty positions around the country and find recruiters to help you get a job. And nothing. Not one phone-call or email inquiry.
Could it be the first impression you made with your resume? Possibly. Take a look at it and assess whether it represents you in the right manner. If you’re making yourself look like a super-hero on it, back it up with endeavors you have done to justify the claims.
This applies in many other aspects. Landing new clients, finding a boyfriend or girlfriend, or selling more products, for example. Many people don’t put as much precedence on first impressions anymore. There’s the “wait and see” mentality, especially in a world where everybody claims to have the biggest, fastest, best, or most awesome thing since sliced bread.
It’s all about presentation. The way you present yourself now should be the same way you present yourself in three, six, nine months or even a year from now. Even after you land your dream job, you must maintain your persona. You have to stay fresh and up-to-date. Nobody wants a “dud” date or a “lemon” car or a product that fails. So, rather than gearing up just to make that all-important first impression; instead strive towards making a lasting one.
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Weaving Our Online Personas
Tapestries are interesting. Every single thread is so carefully intertwined. Every knot joins with the other to form these beautiful pieces of art. Yet, they are so fragile that if you pull on one tiny thread, the whole tapestry becomes indelibly scarred for life. That little misplaced thread leaves an unforgiving mark, turning a valuable art-form into dispensable junk. If you were to show it to anyone, the first thing they would notice is the glaring flaw. They'll ignore the beautiful design, the fine art work, and the craftsmanship. All they will look at, over and over again, would be the misplaced thread. Our eyes have a way of drawing attention to these aberrations.
Now imagine if this tapestry was your life. Everything that you do online contributes a little knot or thread to the tapestry you're building of your persona. With each tweet, Facebook post, Starbucks check-in, or Instagram photo; we are building upon that public image and reputation. Anything we publish can be archived, saved and potentially shared in ways we might not have intended.
"We live in a web of ideas, a fabric of our own making." Joseph Chilton Pearce
The line between our professional and personal profiles is gradually blurring. We now have companies asking for Facebook profiles to 'evaluate' us as part of their hiring process. All of this is fine until we realize that a tiny blip on our radar can spoil our persona entirely. One small mistake has larger repercussions and consequences. A racist comment, a wrongfully snide remark, an offensive photo; it's all recorded. When the companies we aspire to work for are hiring, they'll take into consideration this whole montage that we're presenting.
This point is well illustrated by a controversial new website http://weknowwhatyouredoing.com, created by Callum Haywood, an 18 year old from Nottingham, England. Touted as a "social networking privacy experiment" it unravels our illusion of online invisibility by filtering posts that match certain keywords and then publishing the results in 4 columns: "Who wants to get fired?", "Who's hungover?", "Who's taking drugs?" and "Who's got a new phone number?"
The point of Haywood's website is to promote using privacy controls, and most importantly to emphasize being mindful of what you post. It is common knowledge that people have lost jobs, severed relationships and created all kinds of mayhem in their lives by not thinking before hitting "post".
This is not to say that you shouldn't be yourself. Just be wary that whatever you post might have a much wider audience than you anticipated. And every now and then, take a few moments to step back and look at the bigger tapestry that is forming.
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It's Not All In A Number
We've all seen futuristic movies in which characters had numbers and codes instead of names. It got me thinking about how this simple change could have such dehumanizing implications on society.
While I was daydreaming about whether this might happen in the future, it hit me that in some ways it already is happening.
Have you ever really thought about who has your number? I'm not just talking about the last good looking person you gave your number to or the distant cousin that calls every blue moon. I'm talking about the many ways you are defined, identified, analyzed and categorized by numbers. Not only do banks, governments, post offices, schools and phone companies want to give you a numerical identity, but so does everyone else including doctors, delis, and retailers. Obviously this is because names can be common or misspelled, but number sequences are unique.
This trail of thought lead me to 'phone numbers' and how people have managed them throughout history.
Evolution of phone contacts:
People have been using what we now call a street address to deliver messages since at least 2000 BC. In the mid-1600s the French started to use formal mail boxes, and by the time the telephone came into being in 1870 we were hooked; all we had to do was figure out how to keep track of all those numbers. Being the problem solvers that we are, before you know it the "little black book" was born.
Remember those old hand written address books? Maybe you never had one, but I'll bet your parents did. In the hands of your grandmother it might have been more like what today we would call a scrapbook, with precious postcards, letters, mementos and photos tucked into them. Names and phone numbers were added or scratched out as friends and acquaintances came and went, reflecting how relationships and lives changed over time.
Then, the somewhat more "modern" Rolodex became the symbol of power and prestige if someone had large quantities of important names and numbers stored in them. Yet again, our "contact management system" of old held more meaning to us than the numerical information that they helped to organize.
I don't think we've really changed all that much since then. There's a good reason why Facebook has grown so large that if it's 900 million users were a country it would be the 3rd largest in the world. It's really just a digital scrapbook and Rolodex rolled into one giant stream of people who are posting mementos, comments and conversations in order to stay connected with each other. The core concept is the same, yet the mediums have changed.
At the base of it all is our inherent desire to connect
Every name and number we've ever stored away is proof that we want to communicate, make bonds, and keep them going. If we didn't, there would be no reason to jot down the details about one another.
The digital age is by definition how we have adapted to the proliferation of numbers in our lives - computers have given us the ability to comprehend, sort, analyze and store numbers and all kinds of information beyond the capacity of the average human memory.
And yet grandmother's address book reflected the desires we still hold today. It's the interactions and communications that matter most to us - the numbers are just the means to an end.
We don't want to be quantified, we want relationships that grow and bloom through shared experiences - that's what makes us human. It's also the reason why, in the end, we would ever give anyone our number.
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Building Cues For Our Brain
Ever since I was young, I've always marveled at how our brains work, especially in relation to capturing, retaining and recalling memories. Imagine standing at the shore of a sea. There is so much that we experience when we're standing there. All our senses are on overdrive; seeing the waves as they hit the shore, hearing the sound of the wind, the taste of saltiness in the air, the smell of freshness, and the touch of water and sand. Even the temperature (warmth of the sun contrasted with the coolness of the water)adds specific shades of colors to the scene. When we stand there, we feel and experience this wide range of information and emotions.
How can we capture it?
Some photographers use specific techniques (called High Dynamic Range Imaging or HDR) to allow a greater luminance range between the lightest and darkest areas of the photo. This allows them to capture the moment based on what our eyes see in real life. Trey Ratcliff is one such photographer who has become quite popular for the unique way in which he captures the scenes and moments, and gets millions of views each week on his website.
However, despite the fact that cameras are closer to preserving what our eyes see, there are so many other sensations and feelings that aren’t retained. The smells, the sounds, the changes in your heart-beat... there is so much more that we experience that is lost after the moment is over.
Neuroscientists have estimated that our brain receives an astounding 10 million bits of information per minute. When our brain considers an experience significant enough, it transmits that information to our long-term memory for accessing later. The connections between the neurons are strengthened, and can later be stimulated by just a small cue that brings the scene or event back into our minds.
What fascinates me is how the brain perceives, processes, cognates and records these experiences. Sometimes when we think back to a moment, we can remember the most complex of details, sounds, smells, and the subtlest of changes in emotions. These memories sweep through our body in a singular motion - as if each piece of information is tied to another.
Since I'm a social person by nature, when I think back, most of my memories are related to human interactions. Just like photographers capture gorgeous vistas; I've wondered if there is a non-photographic equivalent for preserving our interactions when we meet new people. Is technology currently helping to aid the brain in retaining such information in an effective manner? In theory, all we really need are a couple of cues (or stimuli) and our brain triggers a string of thoughts, right? Capturing the right cues is important, and it varies from person to person, and situation to situation.
I realized that these "cues" are all the peripheral thoughts that have a defining impact in those moments. Are we inspired by the person? Do we really want to meet them again? What natural chemistry do we feel? How much fun did we have? What was the situation? Where did we meet? What was going on around us? How was I feeling that day? What was I wearing? What was I drinking? These may sound like random thoughts, but they are in fact all inter-related pieces of information that all provide meaning to the scenario. Sometimes even one of these cues can trigger your train of thought.
I've been working on a solution for capturing this information in a manner which is relevant to the way that we live today - i.e. with our hyper-connected and technologically enhanced lifestyles. Of course, I understand that capturing all of the cues and emotions is difficult, however, there is a core set of cues that can help preserve the essence of the interactions and allow our wondrously remarkable brains to do the rest.
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Leaving Crumbtrails in an Ever Connected Life
I've had the privilege to travel the world and meet lots of new people both on a personal and professional level. Eventually I found myself looking for a way to manage the hundreds of contacts I stored in my phone. It felt to me like there was something missing in the way contact management tools were designed. After trying one disappointing app after another I decided to take things into my own hands and design a solution.
The CrumbTrail app came into existence after my team spent almost one year carefully deliberating, brainstorming, designing and proofing my ideas with people who experienced the same frustrations I experienced. We wanted to get it right. We wanted to make sure that we are building a product that not only our friends would want to use but also people across the world.
Every day we are getting closer to realizing this dream. I am going to be sharing the rest of my journey as I go, and I hope you are as excited as I am to partake in this journey with us.
For now, I just want to introduce you to its name. After a lot of thought, we are calling it CrumbTrail.
We knew we needed to develop a way to organize contact information similarly to how the brain organizes it - by association. For example, let's say you meet a fellow travel enthusiast during a party at a friend's house and you had a great conversation about a beautiful hotel in Buenos Aires that he recommended. Months later when you're planning a trip to Argentina you remember his glowing description of the great room service, but what was his name?
In the classic story of Hansel and Gretel, two children are left for lost in the woods by an evil stepmother, but are clever enough to leave a crumb trail to help them find their way back home. Our brains do the same thing, using a trail of associations as little clues that can help us retrieve stored data. The problem is, our brains get cluttered and overwhelmed and the crumb trail seems to disappear.
CrumbTrail is designed to replace those invisible trails in our mind so that our brains don't have to work extra hard to keep everything in memory. It helps you track and maintain those memories of the person you met, drawing them back to you like a magnet whenever and wherever you need them.
It's a fascinating idea... and an equally interesting product. I can't wait to share more thoughts and insights about it as we go.
My name is Eren. Welcome to my world.
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