enouragement-blog

[enouragement-blog]

... Recap?

So I’m back. Oh my... where have you been? How could you be so undisciplined and unfaithful with your blog? If you aren’t going to take this seriously, I’m not reading your blog anymore. Seriously. Unfollow.

I think we can all agree that things have gotten crazy. I find myself personally in a time of transition as well. I’m not quite sure what that means, but it’s happening whether I understand it or not. Some near suicides, severe sicknesses, intense times, serious conflicts; I had to pick and choose what I had time for, and unfortunately I did not have time for this. If you watch my youtube videos, you probably have seen the sporadic posting over the past year.

So we left off before JUST starting a series with organizing our personal, inner life. Let’s recap.

As much as we focus on the external things of keeping our house or car clean, being successful, looking the part and all that, organizing our Inner life is more important. From our inner life is what flows our outer life: the succeeding, the families, the actions, the attitudes, the cleanliness - it all starts in our hearts, our inner world. It’s not just the failures or the super distraught persons that haven’t learned to organize their inner life, but the successful as well. 

Specifically, their are 5 sections of our inner life:

1. motivation 

2 time

3 mind 

4 spirit

5 rest

Obviously this stuff is not sufficient by itself. This study, like the book it is based on, is with the understanding that you are a Christian. It is not meant to earn salvation, keep salvation, or anything like that, it’s more focused on not staying where you started. It’s not supposed to feel like another burden, another thing you have to do, it’s more supposed to be a relief. God took you where you were but He doesn’t leave you there.

So then why organize our inner life? So we can succeed spiritually, live spiritually healthy, and grow. But it’s not just spiritual, it affects your physical life as well: how you talk, what you do, etc.

We like to over-focus on the external to prove our worth or for whatever other reason, but if we get our inner person in line and grow, we become a person of better character and see opportunities that wouldn’t have existed otherwise.

Just like doing dishes, this is not a one and done kinda thing, it’s a daily battle. So we will march forth for the next few weeks discussing this!

[enouragement-blog]

2 disappointing things

There are 2 specific things that will lead you to constant disappointment. By no means is this a list of everything that will make you upset, just 2 major causes for you to be disappointed:

1. your expectations

2. your time frame

We are, in our hearts, control-freaks. We want everything our way, we want to control everybody and everything, and we want it in our time. But the thing is, you don’t see or understand everything. I hope you know that.

Here’s a good example from how we pray: “God change their heart”; what about God’s glory and purposes? Did Moses pray that God would change Pharaoh’s heart? What about yielding yourself rather than praying that God would change everybody who irritates you? Maybe you are the one who is wrong?

“God have mercy on them”; what if they don’t change? Are you just praying that God would have mercy on them so that they will change? What if they end up hurting you and never change because God had mercy on them? What if it is a constant thorn in your side? Are you sure you want God to have mercy on them? 

We want to control things, so we pray, or don’t pray accordingly. I don’t want God to bless that person who is living in sin so I don’t pray for them, even though God tells me to bless them and pray for them. What if in praying for them, God finds them lacking and punishes them instead? What if God wants to change you? What if YOU are the wrong one? But here’s where things get a little crazier: just because you pray doesn’t mean that’s what will happen. Somethings will be and somethings won’t be, no matter how much you pray, but some things may be if you ask. What if you don’t pray the right thing, or if you don’t want that to happen? It’s not about you, and God chooses what to do with it - not that you should pray for stupid things (you might get what you want and hate every minute of it, like judgment).

We cannot micro-manage God; God do this, change this, make this happen. Maybe our expectations and our time frame is what is causing the issue.

No one can bear the weight of the world: thinking you have to be perfect for God to save your kids, or you have to pray the perfect prayer to be healed, or you are holding everything together, or it’s all up to you, or whatever. Surrender it to God. Surrender the situation, the people, the irritations to God - it’s out of your hands. You can’t control it all.

In a world of infinite possibilities of what could happen, what are the chances that your way is best, and that it will actually happen?

Also, your emergency doesn’t warrant God’s immediate action. You probably have more time than you think, and even though you are scared doesn’t mean it actually has to be resolved now. Haven’t you ever went through a difficult situation that didn’t go how you wanted (expectation) and took longer than you wanted? Did you survive? Well ok then.

Also, God can turn hopeless into hopeful, though you may be disappointed if you are still holding God to your expectations and time frame - let God be God and release your death grip.

The situations is probably not as big of a deal as your imagination has made it. Imagination is a great thing - we see opportunities and create solutions often in a place that there is no clear way - but imagination unrestrained is terrible. 

Your inability to be calm doesn’t mean it’s “now-or-never” to God. It might be scary and hard, we definitely need God’s help as we go forward, but that doesn’t mean that we have the right to get disappointed and upset with God. Maybe learn to calm yourself down instead of holding God and others to your level of personal comfort.

As hard as it is to realize this, the world doesn’t revolve around you. Things are not going to go how you always want when you want.

Just because something is important to YOU doesn’t mean it is important, or that it has to be done your way. Instead of demanding that God change His plans and purposes, perspectives and will, or that everyone needs to conform to your wants, be willing to change your expectations and your time frame. You will be a lot happier, and everyone around you will be too. Your expectations need to change

#Why am i upset? #why do I fell like this #be happy #poor expectations #is it too much to ask #christian #advice #happiness #disappointment #addressing #healing

[enouragement-blog]

Driven or called?

I have recently finished a wonderful book By Gordan Macdonald from the 80′s called “ordering your private life”. It was so good that I turned it into devotionals for my worship team.

Some weeks ago we talked about organizing our inner lives and looked at the idea of being a driven person: trying to prove you worth, revolving life around the external (what you can do and accomplish and what titles you can get). We looked at our motivation in life, to live with purpose rather than being overly busy to prove our worth. We looked at how we have reduced everything to external performance - if we do enough we will be worthy rather than attending to our inner life. We looked at moving past the to-do list because life is more.

To someone who is driven (climbing the ladder of success, life about pleasure, how much you can get, etc), the loss of a job, assets, gifts, or health is disaster, but to someone who is living with purpose as called of God, the loss of them really hasn’t changed anything. Becoming handicapped for a driven person means that they are less worthy or capable. And of course handicapped persons can’t do certain jobs that others can, but that doesn’t mean they can’t do anything just because they can’t do certain things. But for the person who is driven, a limb that doesn’t work is less than perfection, reflects poorly on the whole, makes someone less worthy and means that they can’t. I love biking, it helps me clear my head and pray and deal with anxiety, stress and depression. If I become unable to bike, it’s not the end of me, it is simply something I cannot do. My worth is not my ability to bike, even though I enjoy it, t is just a toold.

Rather than living driven like King Saul who had a bunch of what he didn’t deserve and lived his life in fear of losing it, we should strive to live like John the baptist. Worth is not found in a to-do list or in how busy we can be, but the fact that God has made and called us, and given us purpose (not A purpose but an overall key in life of purpose). When John the baptist lost disciples and suffered, it didn’t hurt him because he knew it was about Jesus. His suffering, loss, and unfairness was endured because he realized that was hwat he was called to do. He didn’t have to prove himself. He realized he was not the Christ, and in realizing who he wasn’t he could be who he was. So many times we forget to figure out who we aren’t: we aren’t in control, we don’t get to make the decisions of others, we can’t fix everything. God is in control, and it’s about him.

Deep in our hearts is competition: we want to do more than others, be better than others, get recognition and we hate it when we don’t, but we hate it even more when others do. To top that off, we struggle with pride, the idea that I am good enough, I can do it, I can fix it. Because we’ve never paid attention to who we aren’t, we can’t figure out who we are, who we’ve been called to be, and what we can do. 

For John the baptist, it wasn’t about getting recognized, get a name for himself, or competing with Jesus as the “rising star”. It was about doing what God called him to, which just so happened to be getting out of the way of Jesus. He said “I am not He, I am not even worthy to mess with his shoes. He must increase, but I must decrease”. John understood what it was about. He understood that it wasn’t about fairness in life, but about living with purpose.

Your role isn’t you. What you do is distinguished from who you are. You may be a parent now, tasked with correcting, teaching, and guiding, but one day your children will move out. You may still have a fount of wisdom and advice, but they may not want it. You have to hand the reigns over to their spouse. They aren’t your kids, they are gods and you are a temporary steward. You can’t keep them from the pain of life, you have to adapt to different positions at different times. That is hard. But your role isn’t you. You may serve as a parent, a teacher, a pastor, or anything else, but there is a fine line between the thing or things you do and the person you are. Your role isn’t you. God may have called you to a thing, like writing a book, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do other things as well: work, parent, be a good spouse, etc.

For driven people, retirement is like a death knell. It’s a loss of identity rather than a transition from a meaningful task to a different meaningful task. Whatever job you have, even if you think it is pointless, it’s up to you to give it meaning. Do you have a thankless job that no one appreciates and doesn’t change anybody’s life? Do it with purpose - give it meaning. Maybe you are using it as the means to fund giving to orphans or widows, or maybe you use it to be a witness to coworkers. Just because your job doesn’t seem to be equipping you to climb a  ladder of success doesn’t mean it doesn’t have purpose. Find a job that fulfills you, not by going from job to job but by giving your job meaning. 

If you are a leader, some may change, but that isn’t your job. If you lead worship, it’s not about how people respond it’s about what you do. If you clean, it isn’t about cleaning, it’s about serving and loving. If you give food away to the community, it’s not about the food, it’s about reaching people. There are layers of meaning, and it’s not about you. If you don’t get recognition, aren’t appreciated, or it doesn’t work how you wanted, that doesn’t change your worth.

The issue isn’t the job, but the motivation of the job: to be driven and succeed and earn worth, or to live called with purpose?

It’s not about busyness or proving yourself, but ordering your private world. Don’t try to impress people, get your thoughts and inner life in order.

Step one is: question your motives. What upsets you will show you what your motives are. If you lead worship and you get frustrated that people aren’t worshiping how you want, that shows your motivation was not to worship God and guide people in that pursuit, but to feel good or have things your way or be in control, or whatever. If you are a pastor and you get upset because you don’t have anything to show, that shows your motivation was about recognition and success, not PASTORING someone. Everyone likes results and to see other people grow and succeed, but pouting and throwing a fit when that doesn’t happen isn’t great.

John knew his purpose, and it wasn’t to get attention. He didn’t want to be bigger or better. It was about staying committed, not acquiring the best toys. Peace comes not by getting things my way or being a success but by realizing my expectations and time frame is wrong.

Being called is about God’s standards, methods and criteria of success, not “victory at any cost”, which often means doing something immoral for the end product as if the ends justify the means. 

To wrap things up, are you so pre-occupied and busy you cannot hear God’s voice? Listen to God and you’ll know your mission. Whether you increase or decrease is God’s concern, not yours. Do not order your life according to your expectations or the expectations of others. Don’t draw value from yourself according to opinions of yourself or others. Live called, not driven.

#driven #called #gordon macdonald #ordering your private life #devotion #devotional #christian #encouragement #motivation

[enouragement-blog]

YUP. Plus, it’s my privacy.

Why I'm Not Getting the COVID Vaccine

I know many people are under increasing pressure to get the COVID vaccine - whether it's from peers, employers, family, or the media, it can be stressful to be bombarded by messages that you NEED to get the vaccine, "or else."

I want to share some of my reasoning for why I won't be getting the vaccine, and hopefully it can help you in responding to that pressure.

Reason 1: I don't need it.

The infected fatality rate for my age group, according to the CDC, is 0.02%. I am not in a high risk category, and I am taking steps to protect myself such as taking whole food supplements for vitamin D3/K2 and selenium. Vitamin D3 deficiency is a common factor in almost 90% of COVID deaths, and so doctors are recommending it as a preventative method. Selenium is also being shown as effective in preventing the virus from infecting cells and reducing the inflammatory response. (Note - make sure you're getting a natural, whole food form, as the wrong form can be toxic in higher quantities!)

Reason 2: Getting vaccinated does not necessarily protect those around me.

The FDA frequently asked questions page for the Pfizer vaccine has the following statement:

Q: If a person has received the the Pfizer-BioNTech COVID-19 Vaccine, will the vaccine protect against transmission of SARS-CoV-2 from individuals who are infected despite vaccination?

A: Most vaccines that protect from viral illnesses also reduce transmission of the virus that causes the disease by those who are vaccinated. While it is hoped this will be the case, the scientific community does not yet know if the Pfizer-BioNTech COVID-19 Vaccine will reduce such transmission.

The Moderna page mentions nothing about transmission or infection, and to date I have not seen any studies that show whether the vaccine prevents transmission or infection.

"But they said it's 95% effective!" Yes, at preventing moderate or severe cases of COVID-19 (which is the illness, not the virus). That means, in theory, you could have and transmit the virus without having symptoms. AKA, the asymptomatic transmission they used to justify the lockdowns in the first place.

Therefore, the decision to get the vaccine should be mine alone, since it does not impact anyone but myself.

Reason 3: Long-term effects are unknown.

With any new vaccine, and especially with a new vaccine technology, it takes time to see what long-term adverse reactions are possible. mRNA vaccines are new technology. While they could turn out to be perfectly safe, based on reasons 1 and 2 above I would rather wait for that data to come out.

Reason 4: I am at higher risk for an adverse reaction from the vaccine.

Three groups are at higher risk for side effects, or adverse reactions, to the vaccine: young people, women, and those who have had COVID already. I'm 2 out of 3 of those.

Also, I have chronic vasovagal syncope. We don't have hard data on how the vaccine may interact with my condition, but anecdotally I am seeing that many people in my vasovagal syncope support group on Facebook who have gotten the vaccine are having significant reactions. And they are VERY pro-vaccine, so they are not inclined to over-dramatize their reactions.

Reason 5: Pfizer, Moderna, and J&J used cell lines derived from aborted babies at some point in the development process.

For Pfizer and Moderna, cells derived from aborted babies were used to test the vaccine, but for J&J these cells are used in creating the vaccine doses themselves (but the cells are not actually in the vials).

While the Catholic Church and several pro-life organizations have said they think it's ethical to take the vaccine despite the connection to abortion, I personally have an issue with it and I know that as long as we continue accepting vaccines developed using aborted babies, pharmaceutical companies will have no incentive to do anything different with the next vaccine.

Reason 6: I don't want to.

Any one of these reasons would be sufficient for me to say no to the vaccine. And yet I know there will be people who respond to this saying I should get it anyway.

If you want the vaccine, go for it. You can have my dose. If you don't want it, I hope this helps you explain your choice to family, friends, employers, or anyone else - even though you really shouldn't have to.

[enouragement-blog]

Men-haters unlimited

When I first got married, there were many Christians who offered advice, and many of them were well-meaning, but deeply insufficient. Some of them said about how me and my wife were partners, and how I needed to include her in decisions, and that was all great. But then these same people told my wife how she needed to keep me under her thumb, “train me”, and in many other ways how she needed to run the house and be “the authority”. All of these women were divorced. I’m sure they meant well, but they just didn’t really get it.

When you get married, you accept the person for who they are, because if you do try and change them, it won’t work and you’ll just get frustrated and worn out. If you don’t like the person, don’t marry them - long after the sex is gone, the person is still there.

These women who said this to my wife and talked to her about how I needed to be set straight would also be the very same people who would be VERY upset if I had said that the husband needed to do that to the wife. Ask yourself, am I promoting disunity and marital conflict because of my own issues? If you are, typically you will tell your “sex” to dominate or use/abuse the other “sex”.

These taught me two very important things: first, authority is good, but because of bad experiences, many misunderstand it and think that authority = abused authority (totalitarianism or dictatorship). For those who have had good examples of authority, it’s not such a big landmine for them, and they aren’t scoffing at “over-dominating boys who need to be over-dominated by women with no respect”. For instance, those who didn’t have a good father have a very hard time seeing God as a good father.

Second, it is very common to be blind to great attitude problems that then go and affect the choices we make and the way we view ministry. We joke about this and call it the “man-haters club”. Those women who got divorces and still have bitterness about it are out to prove something. They haven’t forgiven, they haven’t gotten over it, and they are foundationally opposed to authority, even good authority. They spread their poor views onto other people’s relationships and see something that just plain isn’t there. But they are unaware of it. There are parts of the bible they discredit and don’t believe just because “it’s sexist” rather than trying to understand it. 

Maybe the reason you are having a problem is because you are unwilling to learn and change. Don’t put your problem on others or fail to see the value of something because of experience. Grow, learn, adapt, change. Get friends in your life that will help you, not blind you to what you are already blinded to. Don’t just the man-haters / woman-haters club.

[enouragement-blog]

Here comes the worst

Last week seemed like a difficult week. It seemed like one of the worst weeks of my life, and I’m including the week that my son died. What made it so bad? Not much, really. Very few bad things happened, it was just that the bad things that did happen were very pronounced. When a loved one dies, or when someone betrays you, other good things are happening, and you have good memories of before, but that one hard moment makes a really big impression. That’s what happened last week. 

Saturday was a frustrating and un-productive workday, Sunday night service was extremely difficult - there was a married couple that wanted to manipulate people, teach false doctrine, give false prophecies, run the show and usurp authority from the pastor, and other nonsense and I strong word was given by many people TWO SUNDAY NIGHTS IN A ROW. The first Sunday night was a bit rough, and then God clearly spoke and said “you can get up now” because I was cowering on the floor. It was very uncomfortable and the terror of God was in the building. You might have doubts as to whether it was really God, I understand - you weren’t there. Then last Sunday it happened again, but this time the terror didn’t stop. Two long hours. Then a sleepless night, then anxiety and stress all the next day. It was terrifying. Tuesday was another unproductive work day, and then Wednesday was extremely productive and I got a great bike ride in, but forget a meeting that I was supposed to go to - my bad.

So the week really wasn’t that bad. I didn’t miss any deadlines, nothing major happened in my life, it’s just the weight of that Sunday night service with the couple’s arrogance and pride in combination with the poor work productivity. But then Thursday I took the whole day off and didn’t do much. The result? Rejuvenation. I was able to heal and unwind, and I realized although the week had some very stressful parts, it really wasn’t that bad. This week has a chance of having another stressful Sunday, so what am I doing? Taking it easy today (Saturday - which is my Monday), Sunday afternoon, Monday and half day Tuesday. I am insuring that I can stay on point by working on recovery and preparation. I have been in prayer most of the week too, and reading a lot of the bible. But now, back to the big thing that I want to talk about.

Last week God kept us safe in a big way. I was hauling a trailer from central New Mexico almost all the way to Tuscon. I have a lot of experience hauling, and that’s how I know this: we were really in a bad way. My axle hub busted on the way out, and although I heard something off, I did a quick check and nothing seemed off. The trailer was not hauling straight, it was pulling to the left, and I thought it was the wind because Arizona being Arizona, there was a lot of wind. So then I started to come back after a week there, and forgot to do ANY check before hitting the road. I know, stupid and inexperienced. As we got closer to the NM border on the I10, the wind got so bad that we almost got in a wreck from the trailer being thrown around. At that point I didn’t realize the axle yet. We stopped in a little town called Lordsburg NM to visit a ghost town (Shakespeare), and it was then that I saw how the tire was bending everywhere. If you don’t know anything about trailers, let me just clue you in: we almost died about 17 different ways.

When you are living in rebellion, a lot of bad things happen, and it’s like you are cursed. When you are submitted to God, bad things still happen, but it’s different. It doesn’t feel like God is thwarting you, you don’t feel Him thunking you on the head, you feel better, and think clearer, you have an inner peace - though sometimes that takes time. Psalm 40 talks about how God lifted the psalmist out from the miry clay and set his feet firm, but at the beginning it says that he “waited patiently”, meaning that it took some time. Then halfway through he begs God not to withhold mercy from him and begs God to come quickly to save him. Then the psalm ends with him saying “do not delay”. Evidently he was still waiting, or was in another situation. Submission to God doesn’t mean things will always be good; like Jesus said: in this life there will be troubles.

The thing is, many times we don’t know all the blessings and goodness that God is pouring out on us because we are not all-knowing and wise like Him. We were protected by God so many different times that we SHOULD HAVE been dead. My heart is still filled with thankfulness just thinking about the bit that I DID see and realize. Many times we don’t even realize what God has done. We think He is silent, not working, maybe put the situation on hold, but He is always working though we rarely have the wisdom to see. God open our eyes to see you and rejoice.

Our camper was in bad shape after that, but we quickly found someone to buy it in cash and they actually showed up. We didn’t lost anything on it (and yes, I told him what was wrong with it). We could have complained about the camper, and missed the blessings. We could have overlook the good and focused on the bad, and often times that is exactly what we do. Even in bad news, there is still good news, though it might be harder to spot in your emotional state. We lost, but we still had our lives. What was the price of our lives? What was more important? So God allowed/caused/whatever the camper to break, yet we lived. To me, it is like a ransom for our lives: the camper for us. And that seems more than fair. My wife and all 5 of my children were in the car, and my stupid inattention could have cost me everything that is most dear to me. I lost the camper but still had my family - that is a fair ransom. 

Sometimes, we just wait for the next bad thing to happen. Sometimes we think that only bad things happen. Sometimes, we assume that God only blesses us to prepare us for something else bad that is about to happen. We go from “problem to problem” and start thinking that life is nothing but problems. We over-focused on the presence of tragedies and live in fear of the next tragedy.

The thing is, God is always blessing, and the mindset of “Here comes the worst!” overlooks God’s goodness, trusting Him through life, and the joy that can be found in even the simplest of things. It neglects to take into account God’s blessings and makes the struggles larger than life. So instead, here comes the best - the best that you choose to realize.

#here comes the worst #bad news #dealing with it #depressing #always something else

[enouragement-blog]

The pride paradox

Last Sunday a word was given that was very difficult. I don’t mean it was hard to understand, or that it wasn’t from God. The Holy Spirit was very much so present. But I mean it was something harsh; a warning and promise of coming punishment. It was... very difficult.

The correct response when something like that happens is humility and repentance, which was shown in many, but not all. I don’t know if it was for one person specific or a group or a combination. But either way, I felt like hiding. God isn’t always rainbows and butterflies, and emasculating God in an attempt to make me feel better about myself is nothing more than inventing a god. The God of the bible is a very complex being, not as flat as the modern, even “Christian” culture, portrays. The incorrect response is one of assuming it’s for someone else, thinking it couldn’t possibly be for you, looking around trying to figure out who the sinner is.

Words like that feel like they are for everyone, and you feel a great pressure and weight on you. It becomes unmistakable for people who are at all honest to see where they have erred. But it also becomes obvious who is not listening - they look like they are unaffected, try to play it cool. 

So here’s the paradox: those that need to listen to those kinds of words the most feel the least like it is for them and listen the least, whereas those that it is the least for feel most it is for them and listen. It’s a paradox that I don’t quite understand. In my thinking, it’s kinda like, if they aren’t going to listen, why waste the time God? When people get to that point of pride, they don’t listen. This brings up another point: does God reject the proud (action), or do the proud naturally reject God and so God rejects them (reaction)? I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this, and I can say with 100% certainty that I just don’t know. How do we avoid becoming like that? commit to seeking God and learning? Ask others how we are doing? I just don’t know.

One of the worship team said something very interesting in a prayer right afterwards, and it was along the lines of offending God. That really stuck out to me. We talk a lot about others offending us, and we talk a lot about not doing things to hurt others, but the issue was bigger than that. God Himself was offended. It was clear, everybody knew what was going on. God isn’t that old lady in the church that gets offended by everything, and He isn’t impotent like that old lady either. This was really a big deal.

The Holy Spirit causes a searching of motives, since He knows the inner heart. He searches our motives and He shows us. The hard words, anyone can learn from them.

There has noticeably been an attitude of disunity and bitterness in the church lately. And this word directly talked about that. These kinds of problems will always come around. They are like colds, and they can make people grow stronger. Or they can make them grow bitter. But still, just like a cold, they will always come.

We always have to be on guard, like the hymn says, we are “prone to wander, Lord I feel it”. So be on your guard at all times, and maintain humility. What is humility? I don’t know. It’s not self-loathing, because that’s basically pride - it’s all about me. I’m the worst, I’ll never get better, me, me, me. That’s no better than pride. Humility is more about being able to learn. Seeing yourself and others through the lens of God being God. Not thinking you are better than others. 

The prideful are destined to not listen and thereby be destroyed because that’s what pride does to you. The humble are destined to find God. If you are humble, when you mess up it will go better for you especially when you do something really stupid. Never assume you are good or your pride will prevent you from listening and you will fall. So how do you know when you’re good if everytime you think you are good you aren’t? I don’t know. If we could see truly, that would fix a lot of things. But we are prideful and blind to our own faults and failures. 

When the word was given, another person prayer and made the comment in the prayer “who hasn’t?” done this specific thing. When they first said it, I was thinking “What are you crazy? Shut up! Lightning will strike you”! But I started to get what they were saying after a minute: it was a humble response. Instead of who has done such a thing, it was Lord I am guilty too. Yes, God was talking about someone specific, but the correct response is not to be prideful and think that you’re all good.

[enouragement-blog]

Organizing the spirit

Last week I began discussing a book by Gordan Macdonald called “ordering your private world” As with all of his books, I find myself satisfied and having clear direction as to what is next.

In our lives, we often don’t think being disorganized, unclean, or messy is all that bad, but it has been shown to have negative affects on projects, attitudes, and so on. The same is true for our inner, spiritual life. Eventually, if we do not have the systems in place to maintain an organized private life, we find ourselves in a place of burnout, and breakdown with a series of bad decisions. We think that the solution is in doing more stuff, trying harder, going to more events to hype us up, and so on, but all those things are focused on the external and ignore the real issue: the heart.

So why should you give all your time to the outer life and none to your inner life? Who said that it was better to buy more stuff, spend more time watching tv, doing all this external stuff to try to make us happy when we all know that it won’t?

As we look at this in the coming weeks, we will discuss many issues that contribute to the organization of the inner life, but the first is motivation. What is our motivation? There are layers of motivation. The first is easy to figure out: I do this. It doesn’t answer the question of “why?” it’s only a statement. The second is a surface motivation that we often lie to ourselves about. I do it to help that person. But below that is the real reason, the reason that we lie to ourselves about because we want to believe that we are perfect angels, especially Christians who often have a problem admitting when they are wrong. We were their friends so that we could get something in return, like friendship. We helped in a ministry so that we could control it, we did that thing so that we could prove that we have a purpose and are worthwhile. Our lives are often filled with doing, but we very rarely stop to ask WHY we are doing it. Many Christians went to church before the pandemic because it was what they do, not because of any love for Jesus.

There are many people who are very driven. They push themselves and push themselves to conquer. They do this often times because they want to prove themselves to their fathers, earn forgiveness, prove their worth, or leave a monument past their mortality - something for people to remember them by. They work themselves sick, throw their families away, don’t have time for their kids who become a distraction from more important work, and fail to care for their spouse. But still they chug along, and they certainly do accomplish much, but at what cost? They gain the whole world, and lose their souls. People become nothing more than distractions.

Their life becomes all bout the to-do list, accomplishing, earning titles and positions, and it is mostly unsatisfying. They no longer care what the cost is, so long as they get stuff done. They will often justify their lack of wisdom by misrepresenting scripture: Paul said we will succeed if we don’t give up, so that is an excuse for me not making time for people and working myself to death. Paul didn’t say we couldn’t come up for air!

I used to be very driven, always trying too hard. It’s why I am presently going through burnout. I’m tired. I’ve been doing ministry for 16 years and I don’t feel like I have anything to show for it. Numbers is a perfect example of pastoring: nothing but problems, and then you start acting stupid because of the problems like when Moses struck the rock, and then God punishes you for disobeying and it almost feels unfair at first, until you submit yourself to God and grow.

When people are on worship teams or are used in the gifts of the Spirit something similar happens: their motivation goes and they become prideful because it’s all about them and they are so much better than others. But it’s not God’s fault - He used us, and it’s our responsibility to humble ourselves, surrender and be submitted, and keep searching our hearts and growing.

So the alternative to being a driven person is to live with purpose. Being driven is about self, and proving myself, whereas having a purpose is about living intentionally, and searching your motives. Doing things for God rather than for self. Not to prove yourself but in response to God. Unfortunately, many are in ministry but are driven, instead of living with purpose. Over-busy trying to prove their worth and too prideful to let somebody else because they could do it wrong. Competitive with others. I was in a situation with someone like that recently, and I just bowed out of helping in that ministry. I didn’t need the fame and I was busy anyways and they did a lot better of a job when they didn’t feel intimidated by me being there. Competition can really ruin ministries because it’s not about God or helping people any more. And you get where you need more and more. Like Proverbs says, the eye of lust is never satisfied. It always needs more. Driven people always need more. Happiness is always after the next task, but then they always have more to do and are never happy. 

King Saul is a good example: he had wealth, was good-looking, and tall, but he didn’t earn any of that. And then he ended up failing because He never ordered his private life and grew in character, instead he stayed driven. 

What is your motivation?

#motivation #saul #bible #study #grow #learn #gordon macdonald #ordering your private world

[enouragement-blog]

The weight of the world

Lately I have been reading “ordering your private world” by a Christian pastor/author named Gordon Macdonald. He has been a very influential writer to me. 

The basic idea of this book is that people want to be more organized in their life, but the private, inner life is what really needs organization, as it upholds the outer, public life.

What is the outer public life? Knowledge, our experiences, our attractiveness or strength, stuff like that. They are the things you get the most praise for and people notice the most and if you stop doing it or limit it you get the biggest kickback from. It’s what we put the most focus on and what we cave to all the time.

What is the inner private life? It is the choices, the values, stuff like that. When we rest our spirits, why we do what we do (our inner motives), it is the things that we are too busy to do but that we should do anyways: the prayers, the bible study, the personal developments. Things that people don’t really care if you skip because it doesn’t really affect them. And you will be tempted to skip doing them too, because they are not as loud when you ignore them as the public things are. It’s easy to forget to read the bible, but if you forget to do the dishes all hell breaks loose.

And pastors are some of the biggest examples of this - I say AS a pastor. We get so busy trying to help people we forget trying to help ourselves. We never switch off. We never get any real friends because people only take from us, and we are scared to let people in because they could use stuff against us and betray us. We hold the weight of the church on our shoulders and we can’t even talk to other pastors - the only people who know what we are going through - because pastors have this stupid “competition mindset” and we always think that we are right about everything.

Don’t assume that a publically active life means a privately spiritual life. Consider Ravi Zacharias, a very well known christian apologist who apparently was living a double life. He had no accountability or checks in place. He failed to grow personally. He was always too busy in his public roles. You work yourself to death as a minister, and then fail because you allowed yourself to be put on a pedestal. You thought it all fell on you. Pastors forget to seek God because they get caught up in the DOING part of ministry. But it’s the inner man that props up the outer man. 

Let me give you an example as a worship leader: you can worship with words or in integrity/truth. Something you mean or something you feel. A song that you sing or a song that expresses the inner depths of yourself.

Why do I bring up the struggles and disasters of pastoring? Because it is something we all do. You want your house to look better, you like when people compliment your yard. or tell you how good of a job you did, and we think that if we just keep working and perfecting our outer world that everything will be great. But our inner person wilts, and then the weight of the public life is heaped on it and all that is left is ruin, burnout, a person with no integrity. Put your private world in order. Set your hope fully on God. You won’t get the same praise, but a well-ordered private life is a reward of quality of life. Even if you are successful, but that success is put on a poor foundation it won’t last.

[enouragement-blog]

Ruts in our choices

The bible promises that we will have hard times. Still, there are many that think that if they do everything right, everything will be alright. But that’s not true. Not every situation is because of the devil, just like not every bad situation is because of sin. Last week we looked at situations that God instigated, and the bible is full of things that happened just because of life. But today we are going to look at something bad that happened because someone didn’t do the right thing.

In Genesis 12:10-12, 20:1-2 and 26:7-8, Jacob’s father and grandfather took precautions against the natives of the land because they knew they were dangerous. I’m not condoning on their lying, nor am I saying that the generations of lying didn’t have an affect on Jacob, who was a huge manipulator. But, in 34:1-7 we see Jacob taking no precautions against the natives, nor teaching his children to take precautions. In fact, we see Jacob’s family acting a whole lot like Canaan themselves, not just with the way that Reuben slept with his father’s concubine (gross) but also the things that I will mention shortly. 

In Genesis 28:19-21, Jacob said that he would worship YHWH if he came back safely, and then in  31:3 God told him that it was time to go back, yet in chapter 34 Jacob did not go back to Bethel, but to Shechem, and bought property there! God had to reiterate to Jacob in 35:1-2 that he wanted Jacob to go the whole way back, not most of the way.

Also in 35:2, we find out that Jacob’s family had idols (hinted at previously with Rachel), and he evidently knew about it, because he finally decided to address the problem.

Bad things happen regardless, and when bad things happen to our kids it isn’t always our fault, but sometimes they do suffer from the consequences of our actions (though God will not punish them for our sins). When someone is raped, it’s not the person’s fault that was raped. It of course isn’t smart to not take precautions and whatnot, but even if a woman is still careful, she risks danger from men who have no self-control and no character and act more like children than men. But even if a woman put undo trust in a place or a person and had no discretion, IT IS STILL THE RAPIST’S FAULT FOR RAPING. Victims shouldn’t be held accountable for a rapist doing what as Genesis 34 says “should not be done”.

Joseph’s situation later in the book of Genesis was probably not overly avoidable, and Joseph suffered for doing what was right, but Dinah getting raped was avoidable, and happened because of Jacob’s sin. Jacob failed to take precautions against the Canaanites or to teach his kids to, he failed to take spiritual precautions in the matter of the idols, for instance, and he failed to obey God fully about where to go. Typically when we are not fully set on God, we get into a rut in our hearts that affects all our choices. Sadly, his daughter paid the price. His sons would go on to ask that the men of Shechem get circumcised, and agree to terms, but then they broke their terms and slaughtered the men of the village. His sons wanted honor and justice for their sister, but they acted foolishly and deceitfully. Jacob wanted caution and wisdom, but he withheld honor and justice from his daughter in doing so. This is a complicated issue in most everyone in the story did the wrong thing. As the bible often does, it has a different lesson from the different people: the lesson of the guy is that rape should not be done. The lesson of the father is that our choices affect others, the lesson of the daughter is to not trust immoral people. and the lesson of the sons is to act with honor and justice even when others don’t - regardless of whether we are talking about the Canaanites, or the father, or themselves. They didn’t take into account the reproach that the sister would have to live under, the danger the father was in, the lack of character they displayed, or the punishment that was deserved. Yet they weren’t wholly wrong either - they went too far and manipulated.

This story is very important for another reason too: it is the precursor to the Joseph story. A foundation of injustice, inactivity on Jacob’s part, favoritism, and bitterness and hurt was laid among the members of the family that gave the brothers the edge to “step up and  fix the situation” even as immature Christians try to do when a pastor doesn’t respond how they desire. To make the situation more complicated, Dinah was Leah’s daughter, who wasn’t the favorite wife, and Joseph was Rachel’s son, who was the favorite wife. Simeone and Levi, the two brothers who slaughtered the men of the town were Leah’s son’s and Dinah’s full blood brothers. 

Obviously, you can’t protect from bad things happening, but the situation, unlike Joseph’s situation, was avoidable.

What’s the take away? Well, for starters, fully obey God, fully seek God, and take precautions against immoral people. I’m not saying you have to look down on people in the world who aren’t Christians, or see yourself as so much better, but there has to be a middle ground where we love and serve but we don’t take up the sins of those we are loving and serving. Christians are often ostracized from the “sinners” and look down on “those darn gays” or they condone the sin and even partake of it. There has to be a better way where both extremes are avoided, even as Jesus did. He ministered to demon possessed people, but did he take demons into Himself? NO! So why are we so quick to say “ok” to sins just because we like the person or feel compassion? Sin is still sin. BUT arrogance, pride, lack of love, and self-righteousness are also sins that are no better than “those darn gays”. 

Remember, you are nothing more than a pawn in the games of those who have nasty attitudes but don’t want to change. Whether we are talking about people in the world or the church that believe in new age or cultic/occultic beliefs, gossipers, complainers, the offended, and victims, they surround themselves with people like them. Be careful when it just so happens that you are always “witnessing” to those who have a problem with someone (like the pastor), and then you blindly believe what they say against that person (the pastor for instance). Then you find that you keep running into those people - it’s probably because you have a problem in your attitude and others can pick up on it, and go to you “for a caring ear” when the truth is they just want somebody who will condone their crappy attitude. Be careful with the “people of the land”, who don’t care about you, your vision, your purpose, your goals, and don’t want to change, they will drag you down with them, and then lie about you behind your back. “Christians” do it too, so be careful.

#making choices #dinah #genesis #was dinah raped #jacob's daughter #what's the point

[enouragement-blog]

Are you there God?

Last week I mentioned Joseph, and how he was used by God. But there are some very important aspects to Joseph’s story that are very important but often overlooked.

First, after God gave Joseph his two dreams when he was a kid, he never spoke to him again. No special revelation. Imagine enduring a bunch of hardships, suffering for doing the right thing, being falsely accused, alone, betrayed, without answers, wondering if you really heard from God, calling out for God to talk to you, encourage you, validate you, ANYTHING, just to have year after year of silence. Even when he interpreted dreams, it seems as though it was more God giving him the wisdom than directly speaking. We always want God to answer us when we are going through hard times. Did I hear God right? Did I mess up and somehow negate God’s will for my life? Why is this happening? God, give me a sign!

Second, his father kept the dream in mind, then thought that he was dead. Year after year of not understanding why things are happening, and being unable to change the situation, without God comforting him when God knew that Joseph was still alive. The situation with Dinah earlier in Genesis was in large part because precautions weren’t taken, but the situation with Joseph was mostly unfair. “Super glad we put away our household idols dad”.

Three, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob ALL got special validation from God about how He was going to grow the family and give them the promised land, but Joseph NEVER received such validation. His situation (apparently) went from bad to worse!

So, let’s wrap this up. Just because things are going bad, or you don’t hear from God, doesn’t mean that you are living in sin or that God has abandoned you. God was with Joseph AS he went through dark days, so is He with us as we walk with him. Don’t expect God to keep validating you. Trust Him regardless of whether He never speaks again, and do what’s right. You don’t do what’s right for a reward, but because it honors God. 

#joseph #revelation #genesis #dreams #bible study

[enouragement-blog]

God - behind the curtains

Christianity is divided on many beliefs, including the issue of predestination. To drastically oversimplify: once saved always saved. I will in no means attempt to dissuade you from your opinion, even though I know that some get so intense about this as to ACT un-Christian on account of the argument.  I would ask that you put more faith in the bible than in church or tradition dogma.

The first question: does God give us free will? It would appear, at least to some degree: He gave the option to sin in the garden of Eden, He says that whoever calls will be saved, He warns of life and death in the Law that is before them, He warns in Hebrews about sin and those kinds of things, would are pretty moot if there actually is no choice involved. There are consequences for actions. So apparently yes, at least to some degree. This is not just an issue in the church but among philosophers as well (but what isn’t among them - they just like to argue about things “too lofty” for the common man).

But this brings up another issue: how can God be in control if people have free will? Because we are perfectionists, micro-managers, and control freaks, we assume that God has similar thoughts and actions. I would argue that God’s processes are so far beyond our comprehension we will never attain to understanding His wisdom. That makes sense - I am finite, regardless of evolution or lack thereof, and God is infinite. So God gives us the choice, and we are responsible for what we choose. But He knows what what we will do or what would have happened as we see all throughout the bible. Nothing catches Him by surprise.

But God also knows how to get people to react. Consider for instance Esther and Ruth, who don’t mention God, yet “luck” or “providence” or “God’s hand” just magically works it all out. What are the chances that Esther is picked and her uncle works for the king? What are the chances that Ruth comes to Israel and works in just the right field at the right time and gets an heir? Yet somehow, magically, it all works out in both stories. Life is not that smooth, yet it was for them. What about Job? Who gave him his wealth and blessings in the first place? God. Who brought him up to Satan? God. God baited Satan so that He would attack Job and He would get the glory and we would be blessed for thousands of years after because of it. We don’t actually believe that God opened His mouth to Satan, and then inserted His foot when Satan had a rebuttal? Of course not. God knew. Another example if Joseph. God gave Joseph a dream, knowing that he would shoot off his mouth because of inexperience and his brothers would sale him into slavery. Why? so Joseph could grow and in turn save Israel. The bigger picture was more important than the moment of suffering. 

I am not accusing God of any great evil. Joseph’s father had a favorite - that was his fault. the brothers lashed out at Joseph - that was their fault. Joseph told everybody his dream - that was his fault and shows a level of immaturity and arrogance that would not have been great in a leader. Then, when Joseph’s brothers didn’t sell him after the first dream, God gave another one. If Joseph’s brothers didn’t need the push, why wouldn’t have God given the dream AFTER he was sold? There was a very narrow window for Joseph to get to Egypt and for the ball to begin rolling. God didn’t make Satan attack Job.

It’s at this point someone will inevitably ask: why didn’t God just stop the famine from happening? A good response would be: why does anything happen? Why do things change? That is the nature of life, and if it was different, we would question why it was different. Why doesn’t God just keep us in a safe bubble and never allow anything to happen ever? Without opportunity there really is no choice.

Another good example is in Pharaoh in the book of Exodus. The bible says that he hardened his heart, but also that God hardened his heart. So which is it? Yes. Pharaoh hardened his heart, but God caused situations where he hardened his heart and thereby God was glorified. Read the story, this is exactly what God says. Some might say: God takes away free will to those who don’t deserve it. But the issue is that then who does deserve it? By what (hidden) standards? Is it really free will then?

So let’s wrap up. First, although people apparently have free will, God is still in control because He directly causes some things to happen, allows other things to happen, and knows how to get certain results, especially since HE knows what will and what could have happened. Yet He allows people to reject Him and other things that are not His will (such as Hitler killing a bunch of people), even though He controls the flow of history. Don’t think too hard, you’ll hurt yourself. This is why I said we won’t fully understand the infinite, just glimpses that He has revealed of Himself.

What is the main point? There are many. First, don’t judge by appearances. I bet Joseph could have believed very easily that nothing mattered, good is just rewarded with evil, God doesn’t care, and so on. God is on the move, even if sometimes behind curtains - regardless of how we think or feel or see. Your pain either has meaning (as it did for Joseph) or God can give it meaning. As the heart is, so the actions go - as was the case of pharaoh in Exodus; submit your heart to God so that when times come, and God tests you, you will succeed. Trust God, beyond your disappointments.

Just consider Genesis: at the beginning of the book God took chaos and gave purpose, meaning, order. At the end of the book, God took chaos and gave purpose, meaning, order. The theme of the whole book of Genesis is that God, in His good character, produces good, which is also what Romans 8:28 is about. It’s not about not having struggles or rainbows and butterflies, but about God’s foresight and good character and working. It’s not like Paul Atreides in Dune, who does great evil for a greater good, God is good, and does good.

[enouragement-blog]

Kings as symbols

For a couple weeks I had been discussing the books of Kings, and I wanted to briefly come back to them for just a few quick comments. Kings has a few very important lessons that I want to mention.

First, Kings shows us that people are not perfect. It has a way of pointing forward to Christ by emphasizing man’s failures. All these people died, and they messed up, but one who is coming who will be what they failed to be. Solomon’s wisdom wasn’t enough, but God is beyond compare as the GIVER of his wisdom. He never will die, so He will always be there to keep us in the “golden age” of David’s reign and Solomon’s mini-empire. This also points forward to our own time, where we want to have someone to trust and believe in, someone who will fix the thing we care about, be it racism or economic stability or whatever - these things are shadows but the ruler who is coming will resolve those things. Unlike Rehoboam, He will give His people rest.He will always be strong enough and faithful. Unlike David He won’t get caught with his pants down since He isn’t just a “man after God’s own heart” but the FULFILLMENT. Kings shows man’s failures and the faults of leaders as a way of pointing forward to the perfect ruler, Jesus.

Second, we learn wisdom from Kings. We learn how to act and respond as through their mistakes. When Hezekiah was faced with a disastrous situation that threatened to destroy, he trusted in God - and we can too. We may have to die, like martyrs in the past, or endure through it, but He will be there with us to strengthen us, ease our burdens, comfort us, give meaning and purpose, and guide us. We see the consequences and how much individual choices really matter as Kings shows the scope of history. Whereas we have short memories and short lives, Kings shows us a sweeping perspective. Whereas David wasn’t really anything all that special, he loved God, and that trust reached far into the history of Israel, and likewise immorality and evil had a huge impact, though not as great as the good impact of the righteous. Our decisions matter, and God is merciful and works through situations. We also see specific situations and how seeking God is important through them. There is much to learn from Kings, not just about God and how He fulfills our desires for leaders but also how we should act and react and the impact that can have.

[enouragement-blog]

Responding to the unfair

We’ve been looking at the books of Kings for a while, and we probably will again, but today we are going to look at Isaac. Isaac is often overlooked. His stories don’t seem that interesting. There’s Abraham, everybody talks about him. Then there’s Jacob, and everybody talks about him. But Isaac? He’s whatevs.

Genesis 26:12-22 (NIV) says:

12 Isaac planted crops in that land and the same year reaped a hundredfold, because the Lord blessed him. 13 The man became rich, and his wealth continued to grow until he became very wealthy. 14 He had so many flocks and herds and servants that the Philistines envied him. 15 So all the wells that his father’s servants had dug in the time of his father Abraham, the Philistines stopped up, filling them with earth.

16 Then Abimelek said to Isaac, “Move away from us; you have become too powerful for us.”

17 So Isaac moved away from there and encamped in the Valley of Gerar, where he settled. 18 Isaac reopened the wells that had been dug in the time of his father Abraham, which the Philistines had stopped up after Abraham died, and he gave them the same names his father had given them.

19 Isaac’s servants dug in the valley and discovered a well of fresh water there. 20 But the herders of Gerar quarreled with those of Isaac and said, “The water is ours!” So he named the well Esek,[a] because they disputed with him. 21 Then they dug another well, but they quarreled over that one also; so he named it Sitnah.[b] 22 He moved on from there and dug another well, and no one quarreled over it. He named it Rehoboth,[c] saying, “Now the Lord has given us room and we will flourish in the land.”

Now, God often will bless before, during, because of, or in response to suffering. God will bless before, like he did with Job at the beginning of Job, almost as a way to show us his favor before we go through a tough situation. God will bless during a bad situation as he did with Paul, he endured many hardships yet was strengthened by God. God will bless because of or in response to suffering, as he did with Job at the end of Job.

But not everyone else will be happy when you get blessed. Look at the story above. Isaac is getting blessed by God, and his neighbors want him to get out of town. They tried to undo the work of his father Abraham. They just weren’t that into him or him being blessed. Not everyone will be happy for you when God blessed you, and many will be disgruntled and mad at you; envious, prideful, jealous.

But here’s the thing that’s hard for us to get: God giving you comforts and blessings will not undo difficulties you are enduring. Let me unpack this. First off, we think that when good things happen they make us feel better about the bad things that happen, but that’s not true. Ask any pastor and they will tell you that the “wins” and good times don’t remove the pain and hurt that they have endured. In our karma age, we still want to believe that the good will undo the bad, and it won’t. Think of Jacob who was blessed by God, but when his son was dead (he thought), he lived crushed until he heard that Joseph was alive, and then his “soul was revived” Genesis tells us. The blessings didn’t take the pain away. From my own experience I can affirm this: the betrayals, the deaths, the failed expectations, they add up and keep adding up. Though the good is good, they don’t “outweigh” the bad in some scale that magically makes it all ok. Is that not being grateful and thankful? Maybe. I’m not sure.

The second thing I want to point out from my statement is that we think for God to bless us means the absence of problems, the resolution of the situation, but it’s not. Job was still being blessed by God during his trials - he still had a wife, someone to talk to, and air. Even the situation didn’t get worse (because it almost couldn’t, but still). I just finished Robinson Crusoe and this is something that he points out: God’s blessing is quite apart from the bad situation we go through. We want God to keep His blessing and get us out of the pain, but He doesn’t work that way for His own reasons - many of which we may never understand.

You have to get to a place of being content with God in spite of the unanswered prayers, trials, difficulties, and aggravations. Take another look at the story above. Isaac could have said something like this: It’s not fair God! You said this land would be ours, and You would bless us, and those who cursed us would be cursed, yet this is what we have to show! But he didn’t. He didn’t rush God in fulfilling His promises - even when his wife couldn’t give birth for a number of years. He didn’t curse his enemies, and he didn’t complain about his circumstances. God blessed Isaac, but he the situations were often bad.

Isaac went through this long ordeal with wells: redigging, digging new, relocated and digging new again. Through it all, he allowed himself to be wronged and just moved on. That’s a powerful lesson we could all learn. But I was right! Ok... Allow yourself to be wronged and just move on. The result? verses 23-25:

23From there he went up to Beersheba. 24That night the LORD appeared to him and said, "I am the God of your father Abraham. Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bless you and will increase the number of your descendants for the sake of my servant Abraham." 25Isaac built an altar there and called on the name of the LORD. There he pitched his tent, and there his servants dug a well.

God blessed him, and he dug another well. Fruition of blessings, even in the midst of adversity. Blessings followed Isaac AFTER he responded correctly, rather than him acting entitled and getting easy but ultimately unfulfilling outcomes. The unfair will come. God will be with you in it, even if He never rescues you from it. But how will you respond, knowing that God is a rewarder of those who seek Him?

#devotion #bible study #genesis #isaac #wells #bible #christian

[enouragement-blog]

Whose fault is it?

The bible often talks about hard topics, such as why does a good God allow evil and suffering, without just coming out and giving an answer. The problem is compounded by the fact that Christians will usually give a quick answer to resolve the conflict in their own mind. But that’s not great because no learning actually took place. Life is full of hard questions, why should the bible shy away from them and give an “easy out” answer? 

One of the big questions the bible dances around ESPECIALLY in 1 and 2 Kings is the big question of whose fault is it? Was it Solomon’s fault for building altars and sinning or was it Judah’s fault for building altars and sinning? Why did Israel fall? Whose fault was it? Was it God that directly came and punished or was it people who acted? Is God responsible for everything, and if not, how can it be said that He is always in control if people are not always doing what He wants? These are hard questions that DESERVE us stopping and thinking about them, not dismissing them out of hand to clear our own conscience. A faith that isn’t challenged is blind and not strong. I can hide from the world, problems, people, and so on, but my faith would always be fragile and inadequate.

The books of Kings shift between the two extremes, focusing on leaders AND the spiritual climate of the people. True, Solomon may have egged Judah to sin, but what about the Israelites who sinned in the wilderness when Moses did NOT worship idols? So whose fault is it? In 1 Kings 14:22-24, it clearly says that JUDAH sinned. And when Israel falls to Assyria in 2 Kings 17, the writer puts the blame on EVERYONE, leaders and people. We are all responsible for our own actions, yet our actions do affect others. Throughout Kings, the leaders are implied to be responsible for what they do and do not do, and for taking steps to right a wrong, yet the people are not held responsible for the leaders. Evidently it was more about doing what you should instead of looking for excuses to pass the blame.

And yet, all of Israel was punished together, regardless of responsibilities. So does God raise up evil leaders, or does He allow it? Does He give the leader that the people want, or the one that they need? Does He give the chance to people to lead and then others to bring justice, or does He micro-manage everything? Some of these questions are only knowable in part. And it’s uncomfortable to not have all the answers, or to not have God accountable to us. What if God does something we don’t like? Does God want us to respect our authority and submit or rise up for justice? Is it wrong to do nothing if you have the ability to do something? Does the evil that you fight against justify the evil  means that you use?

God is shown in complete control of history, yet people are shown to have free will. How? Of course people mirror what they see - leaders raise up people who are like them. If you want to have a church that loves people, you better love people.

In 14:21 God clarifies that He chose Israel, yet they still hadn’t chose Him. There was immorality in the leadership and in the people, yet nothing was done about it. 

Rehoboam was more focused on getting back at Israel than following God. Solomon followed God then got the mini-empire, but Rehoboam just wanted the mini-empire without the God part. The truth is that you are responsible for what you do, even if someone else was also responsible. As a leader you produce what you are or you do something to change it.

God is in control, but that doesn’t mean it will always be obvious that He is or that everything that He wants to happen will. Of course God doesn’t want people to act wickedly. So maybe our assumptions about “good people” are faulty. We like black and white without grey - it’s easier that way and better to demonize our opposition. But it is almost impossible for even people who do evil frequently to only ever do everything wrong and bad. Even the biggest sinners do something good on occasion, just like the most righteous people still do bad things.

But doesn’t God want me to be happy? Geez, what a hard question. Hypothetically, if the world was perfect, but not the temporary happy we get from having our own way. God has bigger plans than tickling us.

Was there too much uncertainty in this post and not enough answers? If you want answers, read the bible for yourself, but this time don’t shy away from the hard questions and actually think about what you read. The bible talks about very serious issues, it would be stupid to dismiss them with no thought just so your fragile ego is not hurt. Maybe how you see things is wrong, at least in part. Whose fault is that?

[enouragement-blog]

Absolutely. It always makes me laugh when an atheist or someone who doesn’t understand how history and archeology works misquotes findings or presumes too much on the lack of findings to validate their bias against the bible. “Let’s not understand how people wrote, lived and believed, and then cite “proof” that sounds good unless you know ANYTHING about archeology and that will somehow prove that God, the bible, and Christians are stupid.” ok...

Does it ever make you want to cry to think about history & how little we actually know about it? Like there were entire empires that existed & they were glorious & powerful & now all we know about them is what we can find out from ruins & sometimes-fragmented writing. There were entire cultures & ways of life, & people who lived back then probably thought those empires would always exist & be powerful, & now they’re in ruins & have almost disappeared, & idk it just makes me so emotional to remember that

[enouragement-blog]

The times of pressure

There are inevitably times in life that subject us to great pressure. These times of great pressure creates a sort of “survival of the fittest”, and how we choose to act during them instills patterns for the future. Unfortunately, we are sometimes the weakest link, not to sound too severe, and we drop out of the pressure. Some examples: anxiety and fear, where we allow ourselves to stop living; depression and suicide, where we either hide from the world or decide to make those who love us the much suffer the most; divorce, where we were unwilling to grow, learn, change, forgive, and humble ourselves; leaving a church with bad attitudes, where we expect others to be ok with our nasty attitude because “they’re lucky to have me” rather than sticking it out, forgiving, and growing. 

So what do you do if you fail the pressure test? First, let it go. It’s in the past. What’s done is done. Second, expect another pressure test for at least two reasons: first off, they are a part of life and second off, because the faults in our character will always be a constant irritant for us until we face them. God brings things by for us to learn from. If you have been divorced, expect for someone to come by that irritates you and rubs you the wrong way, and yes you will have to change. 

The giving up to the pressure scars us. It makes it where a necessary part of our growth has improperly formed. Because we were not willing to grow from the pressure of marriage (to keep that example going), we will struggle with things we didn’t before and things we did before but now to a greater extent. There is no such thing as hiding from the pain. If you hide from it, you get different pain. Divorce doesn’t remove the pressure, it presents new pressure points, bad attitudes and hurt feelings that take longer to deal with, and insures that the old pressure will eventually return. You can’t surround yourself with people and things you like all the time and hide from everything and everyone you don’t like. I see this happen again and again with divorce: it’s all the other persons fault, so then they get into another problem and give up on it too, because that’s what they have taught themselves to do. Everyone has to work around me, and if they don’t like it that’s tough, but I won’t work around them. And don’t think it’s just divorced people either. People with anxiety and depression do the exact same thing of running back and for to “safe” areas all the while allowing themselves to be crippled and to develop incorrectly with an unhealthy expectation of how the world works. 

Third, everyone will fail the pressure test eventually in SOME area of their life. It’s alright. Do what you can, fix what you can, try again. Why do I write these things? Because growing is hard, not natural for us, and very necessary.