The Stars whisper insistently. The Void is a constant hum of voices, echoing. As a Servant of the Universe, I observe and interpret as I can. Ask your questions, Sojourners. Perhaps there will be answers.
So, if anyone has advice for getting rid of small gravitational anomalies, I’d appreciate the advice. Sweeping is rather difficult when my broom keeps getting displaced into the wall.
Due to recent developments (and investigations by certain parties who must remain unnamed), the Prophet has deemed it necessary to hire an “assistant”. As such I have been selected by the Prophet to fill that role. I’m no cosmic entity or strange cryptid. I’m just your average female human of just-out-of-college-age. Specifically I’m an English major with a side-hobby studying myth, lore, fantasy, the supernatural, the strange, and the unusual.
To clarify, I’d never met or even heard of the Prophet before answering the ad for a paid, live-in internship promising “Insights unavailable anywhere else” and “livable wages”. In hindsight, the lack of details on the employer should have been a red flag. But you all know how the economy is. A paid internship providing a room and on-the-job training is too good to pass up. Even if I do receive paychecks in a mix of different currencies.
As for what I’ll actually be doing here; I am meant to act as a mediator, intermediary, translator, public liaison, et cetera, et cetera, on behalf of the Prophet for the foreseeable future. No pun intended. Also I’m to remind them to actually share their insights and not just shout them into the Void. The details are a little vague. I’m taking over the post from a previous employee who left “for health reasons”.
I’ll try to keep out of the way so as not to bother any guests (the Prophet has called you all “Sojourners”, I believe). Also I’d prefer not to disrupt the Prophet’s . . . uh, thing, they have going on here. Although I may have to ask that they ensure there’s a consistent entrance and exit so I can run errands.
I’ll be studying the Prophet and their “residence” here as quickly and comprehensively as I can, so if any guests have questions, comments, or concerns that the Prophet either can’t or won’t address, I’m available to assist. I’m easy to find, but if I’m not in the front room just ring the bell and I’ll stumble my way back in. No promises that I’ll be able to tell you where the bathroom is, though. I got lost three separate times looking for it.
With cautious optimism,
- The Assistant
PS: Please forgive any messes, I’m still trying to educate the Prophet on the need for a cleanly environment in order to make “Sojourners” feel a bit more welcome.
They wear a cloak made from a new shower curtain from an old roadside inn. They always arrive just in time for the first leaves to fall. If they walk by, offer them an unopened can of your proffered soda and they will tell you something you need to hear.