#[slaps target on my back and cries] haha here we go

[charcubed]

I keep seeing posts that are like "interpretations of bi!Dean and gay!Dean are equally valid!" and I used to be like, sure, straight!Dean is definitely wrong but beyond that, see him how you want, who cares.

But now (esp after the Last Call script) I just don't understand the gay!Dean truthers? I follow quite a few on sm, and when I initially followed them I was like "they accept Dean is queer, that's good enough for me." But now they're really starting to get to me and it's not really worth arguing about to them, but I wanted to rant to you about it, cuz you get it.

The script literally included "gorgeous women" in the bar. Dean has canonically been sexually AND romantically attracted to women. He's based off THEE bisexual Neal Cassady.

Like I'm not really trying to defend m/w relationships (lol) but why do even queer ppl insist on erasing his identity when it's so clear? Why do they have to take that away?

Gay!Dean in AUs is one thing, but in the actual, textual canon of the show, Dean is bi. And no, gay!Dean and bi!Dean are NOT equally valid interpretations. And I don't think I'm an asshole for saying that 🤷🏼‍♀️

Sorry it took a few days to get to this. Work and life have kept me busy and tired!

Unironically and non-sarcastically, Anon, I'm glad you've seen the light and seem to understand this topic more now. You are, of course, entirely correct. And you're not an asshole for saying it either.

I'm going to take this opportunity to answer your (potentially rhetorical) questions, and also bounce off of you and lay some stuff out about this topic in general at length for the first time–despite the fact that it may turn me into public enemy #1 again. I am already hated for non-combatively voicing these facts on Twitter (this thread tends to be considered one of the "ground zeroes" of the nonexistent "debate" lol), but I have avoided being dog-piled on Tumblr so far, so... fingers crossed I can miraculously keep it that way!

My hope is that anyone who is predisposed to taking this topic very personally just moves on instead of attacking me (or subposting me?) for any of what I'm about to say. I'm also not forcing anyone to read this, before anyone's like "that's way too many words" or "it's not that serious lol."

I do think this topic is important. I've made the decision to publicly spell out why. And if anyone doesn't want to read it, that's their prerogative.

To your questions, Anon:

I think a lot of this comes down to a fandom-wide problem (all fandoms recently, not just SPN) of not understanding the difference between headcanon and canon, the dimensions as to why that distinction does have its uses and its necessity, and the value in both. I'll get into this later.

But in this fandom specifically, based on observation and lengthy conversations I've had with a dozen long-time fans who are my friends... I personally think it's maybe a new dimension of viewpoint that's branched out from a holdover of "all interpretations are valid" being the party line people have clung to a very long time. (That’s also true in other fandoms, but I think it’s especially true here.) It's a form of solace people don't want to deviate from. No one wants to be seen as or feel like the ~jerk~ who's ~invalidating another person's view of canon~ in response to someone else's knee-jerk reaction of hurt. This is a fandom with early-2000s cultural baggage and context, where people dealt with feeling like the "crazy fangirls" who shipped Destiel and dared to call out queer subtext. Misha's "You're not crazy" tweet exists for a reason. I do feel like a lot of well-meaning people–aside from misunderstanding or being ignorant to the analytical roots of this topic and why they absolutely matter–just know what it feels like to have their thoughts on queer content in a show feel "invalidated," and they don't want to be perceived as doing that to other people. And/or: they’ve felt invalidated before (in this fandom or others!), and so they’re hypersensitive to anything they perceive as doing that to them again, especially if they tied personal identity into the projections they’re making onto the media they enjoy.

I understand that people don’t want to seem ~mean~ or make waves. I also don't want to seem mean or be mean, which is why I try to be as clear as possible whenever I talk about this and I never go after people directly (or interact/reference any of the many subtweets from people who openly talk shit about me. haha). But the facts shouldn't be seen as "mean"; they are simply facts. And yes, they absolutely matter.

Because the thing is... none of the above has any bearing on the nuances of the topic at hand, the indisputable fact that Dean is bisexual in canon and that claiming otherwise is erasure, and the truth that none of this should be seen as a threat to people's headcanons. 

These are all things that people should understand, and I will not apologize for knowing that and saying it. Misunderstanding this–making the false claim that “all interpretations of Dean’s sexually are equally valid as long as you see him as queer”–is an act of bisexual erasure in this context, and it often (unintentionally!) plays into biphobic talking points. And yeah, in my opinion, that’s something people should care about because it’s worthy of both personal and fandom examination. It is, in fact, why “representation” matters at all.

Let’s not kid ourselves: the bulk of this fandom-wide discourse is about Bi Dean vs Gay Dean. So, y’know, that’s the bulk of how I’m going to address it to just get it all out there.

Right out the gate, let me clarify this: I am not saying–now or ever–that those who are self-proclaimed “Gay Dean truthers” or argue that “Dean being gay in canon is a valid interpretation” are deliberately coming from a place of malice and the intent to contribute to bisexual erasure. By all means, I’m sure most aren’t! Nonetheless, intent does not equal impact. I’ve even seen people say “I’m a Gay Dean truther and I’m bisexual, so how could I possibly be contributing to bi erasure by arguing for Gay Dean?”  But in this situation–as in any other–no one is immune from unwittingly perpetuating harm, even including bi people. And it’s important to understand why that is.

“Interpretations” are not opinions, not all are equal, and they do require some level of skill. This is not a personal attack, or a moral judgement on anyone, or somehow a threat to people’s enjoyment of a favorite character. It is just fact.

Gay Dean is not a valid possibility in canon. There is no lens that justifies an argument of it with canonical basis. I have to break down why, in order to sufficiently express why claiming otherwise is a harmful position to take, so bear with me.

(No, this is not an invitation for a Gay Dean truther to treat this like a “debate” with me or waste time writing out a counterargument. Please just exit the tab if you’re somehow here battling that urge.)

For someone to say that Dean is gay in canon, here is an incomplete list of what has to be erased, ignored, or explained away:

• His sexual attraction to, romantic love for, and relationship with Cassie.

• His sexual attraction to, romantic love for, and relationship with Lisa (whether or not one thinks she was ever the ~ultimate love of his life~, attraction and love were present.)

• His stash of and enjoyment of porn that includes women, which is referenced many times.

• The moments where he was seduced by a female-presenting monster.

• Each and every time he made a reference to or joke about his attraction to women.

• Any fling he ever had with a woman on screen, and the enjoyment he had in the process.

The man is canonically sexually and romantically attracted to women, and he has acted upon that and even enjoys that about himself in wildly diverse contexts. It is a blatant part of the text of the show. (The fact that we are at the point where this is somehow a main point of contention rather than his attraction to men does make me feel a tiny bit insane, to be honest.)

Now, in my experience (which I don’t claim is comprehensive!), the people who argue for Gay Dean tend to explain ALL of this away under some form of universal umbrella of Dean being “performative,” a variation on compulsive heterosexuality they ascribe to him. The claim or explanation tends to be that Dean was performing a mostly-faked attraction to women based on his father’s expectations and outward pressures he received in the culture of his life. Moments are often cherry-picked out of context to support this “reading.” 

Who is Dean supposedly performing FOR, even in the moments where he acts on his attraction to women when he is alone? How does this explain his significant relationships with women like Cassie and/or the legitimate visible enjoyments he received from those interactions, as well as his flings with women throughout the show? How does this explain things like the Last Call script, where Dean is very clearly written as attracted to “gorgeous women,” a factoid that is not only very clear on screen but also (of course) written in literal black and white?

(There are no sufficient answers to these rhetorical questions. Once again: please do not waste time trying to give me any.)

And what evidence are Gay Dean people using for comphet or performative Dean? The “evidence” is often a misread of canon, pointing towards the consistent theme and false goal presented in the text of the show of characters’ efforts to strive for an “apple pie life,” aka a heteronormative ideal family. Gay Dean people misrepresent what this theme and through-line in the show is actually about, which is the totality of learning to accept your life rather than striving for something ill-fitting, that what you need and want need not be mutually exclusive (family life including fulfilling romance + hunting life can coexist), family is what you make of it and how you define it, and there are no true limitations on what all of this “should” be. While these themes are inherently queer, they are not about narrow performances of masculinity, femininity, or sexual identity, but about making space for ALL forms of all of the above–AND about identifying what it is that one wants and thinks they can’t have.

Namely, for Dean, that’s a version of settling down in a life that fulfills him in every direction, with an open and honest mutual relationship with the person he is in love with. This latter point would be true whether Cas was a man or a woman (though the fact that he is a man of course adds further dimension of interest to the story). Dean doesn’t think he can have a romantic relationship / family that lasts, and by later seasons that yearning is a key part of his character. The times it didn’t work out for him weren’t because those other people were women, but rather because the “lesson” he internalized from traumatic instances of loss is that hunters don’t get to do ~the love thing~ or get the settled down life. This is stated in the text of the show multiple times, and that’s also why Dean seeing examples of hunters who made any kind of balanced life work (especially masculine queer hunters like Jesse and Cesar) is pointed and purposeful. To say it’s about comphet instead (with no sufficient canon evidence that supports that) disregards a key point that’s central to Supernatural’s story, and in my opinion it disregards it to its detriment.

For Dean’s journey in particular, it is about freedom from limitations of structure, and knowing that he contains multitudes. The things he got from John–loving classic rock and loving his car, for example–are no less core joyful parts of Dean simply because they originated from his father. Dean can love classic rock and still occasionally love a Taylor Swift song, for example. He can love cowboy movies and manly movies, and also enjoy chick-flicks. It’s the idea of learning that there are no limitations, not that masculine interests are not inherently something he loves for himself or that aren’t important parts of his identity. It’s an expansion to openly include more, not a switch or a narrowing. The same applies to his sexual attraction and his queer identity. He can be attracted to cowboys and bikers, and also be attracted to gorgeous women. Him being attracted to / loving women does not mean he cannot and does not feel attraction and love for men; likewise, him being in love with a man does not mean he wasn’t and isn’t attracted to women. 

(“Last Call,” as an episode, exists in part to drive the totality of these points home, and emphasize that Dean’s attraction to men is something he’s known about himself for most of his life and acted on previously. So is most of the queercoding and queer subtext applied to Dean–which is specifically coding him as bisexual. His attraction to men is sometimes established or made clear because it echoes his attraction to women, etc. etc. Dean’s canonical attraction to men is a whole other post.)

So here we come to why saying otherwise and trying to shoehorn a comphet narrative onto Dean in canon is harmful:

Aside from the fact that to claim Dean’s joyful attraction to women is performative is to cut out chunks of the story and is thus not supported by canon, and it relies on making assumptions about and projecting onto the text… unintentionally or not, the implication is that bisexuality is not queer enough, or that being gay is somehow “queerer” and thus more compelling and a preferred concept, and that attraction to different genders is a heterosexual / straight trait requiring removal. No one is queering a text in a more revolutionary way or unlocking a ~secret good Supernatural~ by making a bisexual man into a gay man. That’s simply not how this works.

“Preferring” an argument for Gay Dean in canon requires explaining away or misreading all of those moments Dean has with women, essentially replacing them with trauma or suffering or discomfort that–in my observations–also sometimes rely on stereotypes of gay men. It also involves potentially preferring to twist them into behaviors Dean must have universally put himself through not out of genuine joyful desire but at minimum because he felt like he “should” or at maximum in an attempt to “fix” his “gayness,” even when no one was watching. And it points to the pressures Dean experienced about living a life that fit him fully–pressures that exist not just in his world, but also in our patriarchal world and society–and it implies that queer people can’t authentically experience attraction or love to someone of a different gender, because maybe they’re actually just “performing” the heteronormative ideal. As in: a “visually queer” relationship is the end goal, right? For Dean, that’s an m/m relationship... so surely m/f matters less, or maybe it can’t be a genuine and significant part of a queer person’s life.

Once again: I do not think any of this is intentional on the part of Gay Dean truthers, nor do I think it’s done with malice. Nonetheless, these harmful biphobic viewpoints permeate these conversations and misconceptions when people say these arguments are valid.

There is no canonical basis for explaining away all of Dean’s moments with women, and the story does not provide or point to any kind of cohesive narrative reason to do so. YES, people absolutely experience comphet in real life, and those experiences are valid and exist. YES, real gay men can and do sleep with or have nuanced romantic relationships with women before realizing they’re gay later in life. No, that does not mean that’s how analysis of a fictional character in a fictional story always works, especially in regards to a story built over time like Supernatural’s unique approach and the way it was molded to place queerness and specifically bisexuality at the core of Dean’s story.

Ascribing comphet to Dean in canon–or making any other insufficient justification for explaining away his attraction to women–is personal projection. And yes, it is bisexual erasure.

This is not a position fueled by personal hurt for me, as I would say the same here whether or not I was personally bisexual. It is an acknowledgement that these conversations don’t exist in a vacuum, and that’s something everyone should care to understand. I know what comphet storylines look like in fiction, and I know they are worth defining as such, and in other fandoms I even defend that very loudly. This is not the case here, and to say it is requires mental acrobatics that are objectively unsupported by canon... and invariably insisting otherwise perpetuates one of these harmful biphobic viewpoints whether or not one realizes it.

To say Gay Dean is a legitimate read of canon–which it is not–supports people who are erasing his varied sexual and romantic attraction to a different gender simply because they’ve decided they want to ignore that. “I like the idea of Dean being gay” does not mean that he is gay in canon, and writing meta to that end is a problem. It’s not an invalidation of someone on a personal level or some weird variation of homophobia to say that, and I do think people should maybe examine why they seemingly like the idea of him being gay more than him being bi, or why they staunchly defend it (or any other “different queer reading”) as a possibility. 

I understand there may be the urge to be like “is it that serious” or “this is just a CW show,” but to that I would say… then why are we all here?

Clearly, most people do still care about queer representation on some level and understand that queer subtext is present and acknowledge that Dean isn’t straight... hence the origin of this new prevalent concept of “as long as you say Dean’s queer then it’s fine.”

But in any piece of media, the text is the text is the text. The text can also be compelling, and fascinating, and contain value whether or not it’s an exact reflection of you personally as a fan and as a person. Sometimes there is arguably even greater value in being able to find reasons to relate to the humanity of a character or in a story even though elements differ from who you are personally. It is an exercise in empathy, and it is a pillar of why humans tells stories to each other to expand our viewpoints, and it sometimes results in examining the sources of that empathy. It’s why “representation matters”: not just so we can see ourselves, but so we can see others, and find reason to empathize despite differences. There’s unquantifiable power in that, and it’s also why the diversity of queer experiences and identities should be championed and acknowledged both in fiction and in reality, not turned into a monolith. Our solidarity amongst our individual queer differences and identities is our truest version of strength and authenticity. We are not all exactly the same, and that’s a good thing. When care is taken to specifically convey that in fiction, it is worth not only acknowledgement but also defense.

So: do we or do we not care about why representation is important, and why these sorts of conversations should exist at all? About censorship of queer storylines, and diversity in the queer community, and solidarity in differences? About bisexual men, a vastly underrepresented group in fiction, and the specific censorship that affected Dean’s bi story accordingly? And about how these viewpoints people can place onto fiction through fandom-wide conversation–like implying Dean is ~queerer~ if you say he’s gay, or that you’re somehow sticking it to the CW and “straight culture” if you suggest he’s gay–can influence biphobia that translates into ways people see bi people in real life?

In other situations even in this fandom, people understand the value of diverse queer experiences. No one would dare to say that “you can argue Charlie is bisexual in canon because as long as you say she’s queer it’s fine.” Charlie is a lesbian. It’s very, very clear, and she shows and states that she is only attracted to women. Dean’s attraction to women in canon is equally clear, and is part of his bisexuality. Why is erasing that defendable?

Look: it is people’s God-given right to write whatever fic they want about “what if” variations of Dean’s sexuality through a different lens. It is not their God-given right to make things up about canon and call it analysis.

It is a universal truth that fandom is always going to take canon and mold it into other versions that they love, for their own personal reasons and in ways that have value to them. That’s why transformative works like fic exist, and it’s why fandom is awesome, and I’m glad people use aspects of their favorite stories to tell other inspired stories that are of personal significance to them. But the word transformative is used for a reason: it’s an alteration of canon. It’s not a bad thing or a personal attack on people to say that.

There is a difference between understanding canon and writing actual meta / analysis of the show, and writing AUs for ones own enjoyment and fulfillment. (This is true on AO3 or on Tumblr/Twitter. I often see posts that are positioned as “meta,” but again, are just cherry-picked weirdness.) These differences are important, as is understanding how headcanons and fic affect surrounding conversations and fandom perceptions. And this fandom seems to have a very big problem with understanding the difference between these things, while taking it extremely personally in a negative way when people try to explain why the difference matters.

Confusing analysis and transformative fandom does a disservice to both, and denying the value in the former is not only a form of anti-intellectualism but also removes some of the beauty in the latter. If we can’t distinguish and differentiate between canon and headcanon, we can’t discuss the value in understanding the canon, nor adequately discuss the artistic value and power in creating derivative variations from it in personal ways. Both are different, both are equal, both are vital, and insisting the distinction is needless hampers conversation across every space. And nowhere is that more true than when one is discussing queer representation and queer censorship, like in the case of Supernatural. Again, why are we here? Why do we care? You cannot argue for and discuss the problems of censorship sufficiently if you don’t understand what was censored–and in Dean’s case, that was his love for Cas and his bisexuality.

I leave you with this (probably unneeded) analogy:

Imagine Dean’s a zebra.

(Sorry, EDS community; not that kind of zebra.)

People are trying to say “Dean is a black and white hoofed mammal <3″ and well, that’s accurate, but that doesn’t mean him being a zebra isn’t its own unique thing. A whole bunch of people are looking at him though and saying “well I prefer to say that Dean’s a black and white horse,” because they like that viewpoint better. Close enough, right? A black and white horse is basically a zebra, right? And then there’s the people who are like “I think Dean’s a cow!” and it’s like, okay, no idea where you came from, but whatever.

The point is that those are all entirely different fucking things. They’re different animals. Someone wanting Dean to be a black and white horse doesn’t make him less of a zebra. Pretending otherwise is absolute nonsense.

This debate/discussion/discourse is equally nonsensical. That is the logic (or illogic) that applies here.

Just because Dean is “queer” doesn’t mean any queer categorization underneath that umbrella suddenly equally applies.

Dean is bisexual. And he is “queer” because he’s bisexual.

Those are the facts. 

And for the love of God, please... I really don’t think I’m an asshole for saying it.

So, to whoever made it this far: please do me the courtesy of not hating me for it or trying to bait me into a fight. 

I’m tired. Thanks.

----

EDIT: Couple of good additions!

•  @doctorprofessorsong added some good details about how some of these harmful biphobic concepts translate to real life, and real things that bi people struggle with.

• A lesbian anonymously sent in her perspective as someone who enjoys gay Dean headcanons/fic and agrees with this post, and agrees that the fact that Dean is bi in canon is important.

#dean winchester #supernatural #dean is bi #bisexual dean winchester #HAHA I TOLD MYSELF I WASN'T GOING TO PUT THIS IN THE OFFICIAL TAGS BUT THEN I SPENT HOURS WRITING IT SO FUCK IT #[slaps target on my back and cries] haha here we go #I'm not linking it on twitter though. I don't have that level of masochism in me. maybe this will fly under the radar on here a bit? #spn meta #I take a marijuana level of high road on twitter constantly but fun fact I'm not immune to knowing people hate me for daring to say this #doesn't change the facts though! and unfortunately I do actually give a fuck! even if few others do #maybe this is so long no one will read it #char writes things #also I did absolutely plagiarize myself in parts of this. what about it. ok I'm done goodbye.... screams #PS people CAN reblog this btw. I am being a little baby wincing at potential backlash preemptively but like #I wouldn't have posted it and left reblogs on if I didn't know and accept the risks <3 I will speak the truth idc idc someone's gotta do it #EDIT: I stopped being a coward and posted it on twitter :) because fuck it! I stand by my words etc etc it's all fine #me vs adding to the tags as if anyone's reading them lmfao

[theskyexists]

Emperor: *once again shocked beyond belief that somehow the people he is most close to have ‘fallen in love’ (though truly romantically now) with Yingluo*

he’s literally like HOW DOES SHE KEEP DOING THIS ????

in a way - it is quite a feminist story for it

the EMPEROR is going to target Yingluo? jezus - so many fucking targets on her back

where’s his head eunuch?

is....this really going to work?  erqing.....i mean she’s going to be evil rival right? so she’s not going to get....killed. right? noooooo dont do this seduction thing

this would be reallly rapey if we didn’t extensively know that the emperor really isn’t interested and Yingluo also knows this

‘you deliberately approached him’ - yeah but only to kill him not to marry him LOL

LOVE THAT. they really are seperated by a raging emperor right now. so romantic!!!

what is Erqing trying to do by pushing Yingluo at the Emperor? did she realise they ARE the furthest from having a positive relationship that could be??? a way to get her killed?

why lie?

it’s actually genuine though - like, she really DOES think of the Empress as her sister. lol. but Erqing is like - GODDAMMIT WHY DO YOU GET TO BE SO FAVOURED??? yingluo is like quicksand, fight - and you’ll drown

wow Yingluo, this speech is not de-escalating Erqing’s feelings of inferiority. you’re making this a bigger grudge!!! idiot.

people somehow KNOW that ‘she rejected teh emperor’? LOL

she’s manipulating you again Fuheng!

what? she just straight up goes - hey this woman killed my sister!! she realised gossip exists?? and that shes protected? oh... she’s thinking she can get away before she gets whipped to death bc of the lightning

oh no she just gets to talk a lot nobody stops her lol

HOW DID SHE GET THE LIGHTNING TO HIT THIS FUCKIN PALACE. DID SHE BRIBE A EUNUCH???

she got struck by lightning through the chiffon but (?) she didn’t die? ofc not bc yingluo somehow never kills anyone

THIS EMPRESS is so stressed about her reckless little sister

ok so there’s like - a trade. yingluo got revenge but lost her new big sister. but why is the empress so mad? because she knows yingluo must have done something?

she’s gonna get screamed at/ slapped for talking some more hah

the empress is just sick of worrying so much. but she’s definitely gonna regret it and she’s definitely gonna lose the baby

love how upset mingyu is. wish erqing wasn’t turning into a villain

she broke up with her almost bf, she broke up with her big sister, at least she didn’t break up with her little sister....

DID she deliberately punish her first?? SHE DID. why didn’t she just tell yingluo. jezus.

omg it is feminist. the empress wants to be free you dumbass. SEXISM PLAGUES EVEN THE MOST POWERFUL WOMAN IN THE EMPIRE. “I....don’t understand.”  yeah. duh.

WOAAAHHH A LESSON IN FEMINISM???

she sees in Yingluo a woman so extroardinary she could escape the claws of patriarchy. AND SHE MUST PROTECT HER AS THOUGH SHE WERE PROTECTING HER YOUNGER SELF.

WOAW! THIS CAME OUT OF CHINA????

hmmm, he thinks, hmmmm, should i kill my wife’s projection of the self she could have been if she hadn’t become completely suffocated by the role she was shuttered in?

if yingluo cries ONE tear then she ISN’T the strong woman the empress sees. the fuckin astronomical standards these bastard men set are just

now that shes avenged her sister, what’s she gonna work for? is this series gonna get worse bc there’s no overarching goal?

there is a RANDOM childhood connection between the fourth prince and teh consort because SOMEHOW he was allowed to wander around alone as a kid

fuheng is so cute. IM GONNA MARRY YOU RIGHT NOW TO GET YOU OUT OF HERE. idiot lol

WHAT. so.....epic. so amazing. haha. what the fuck are you doing. ok i know she knows fuheng won’t take advantage of her in the middle of the fucking court but like, LOL, she’s so hardcore.

YOU PRESSURE YINGLUO TO YOUR OWN DETRIMENT? GUILT FOR FUHENG! GUILT FOR 100 YEARS!!!

I LOVE THIS COUPLE SO MUCHHAHAHAAHA. 

oh cliffhanger - is he gonna take advantage? OF COURSE NOT. he’s going to CLOSE HER CLOTHES. but Eunuch Yan is gonna come to the rescue first bc of the misunderstanding

#my stuff #vidi #i love this series. but now ....like - we're not even halfway and Yingluo has already avenged her sister! #how is that good writing.... #idc about the fuckin consorts alright #yanxi palace #ok i care about fuheng also #but that's it

[atopearth]

The Men of Yoshiwara: Ohgiya Part 4 - Utsusemi Route

Honestly, I’ve always enjoyed Utsusemi’s cheery vibes, and I love how casual yet elegant he is, so I’m looking forward to his route! I find it so endearing that Gakuto is paying for Utsusemi’s elegant robes and everything for his ceremony into becoming a top class geisha, never realised they were actually sworn brothers haha. Utsusemi coming to save Kiyoha when she was being hassled was so cliche lol, but I love how he and Kagerou seem to get along nicely! They talk with no reserves and you can tell that Utsusemi treats him very much like a friend in that he doesn’t hesitate to say whatever he thinks, since even though Utsusemi usually has a very casual vibe to him, I feel like a lot of it is because he’s made that playful him his “geisha personality”. Ohh so he’s not becoming a top class geisha, it was just one of Gakuto’s tactics to kinda reel in Kiyoha? Kinda crazy how honest Utsusemi is about it though.

Although Utsusemi laughed at Kiyoha for picking him because he’s easy to talk to, I find it understandable since she knows she’s inexperienced and doesn’t want to fall haphazardly for Gakuto or Takigawa who know very well how to charm their clients considering their high status as geisha. I think having someone like Utsusemi who’s pretty chill is nice. Wow, that was so unexpected. I never thought Utsusemi would be so good at kyuudou(?), the sport where you ride a horse and shoot arrows at targets. I always found it amazing because it’s so difficult, but to think that Utsusemi is like a pro at it! I’m really surprised and impressed haha! I like Utsusemi, but I’m not sure how I feel about the way he got her to drink so much before really asking her whether she wanted to be intimate tonight. I guess we’ll see how sincere he really is… I find it really intriguing that Utsusemi is unsure of how to make Kiyoha more comfortable for her first time and blames himself for his inexperience. Most of the women who choose Utsusemi are apparently older women who kinda take the lead instead, so I guess it’s rare for him to interact with someone around his age who is so pure. I like how optimistic he is though. I think them taking it slow to fall in love with each other and then do it was pretty expected haha. It’s so cool how Utsusemi was taught horseback archery by Kagura! No wonder why Kagerou always argues with Utsusemi, they’re like competing for the affection of Kagura since he teaches them both so many things hahaha. It’s saddening that Utsusemi was an orphan on the mainland and was just randomly brought here, but I guess it’s good that he’s not starving?

Kiyoha showing Yoko around Ohgiya was pretty uncomfortable lol, especially since she liked Utsusemi too. I kinda think that if there’s stuff wrong with her etiquette, they should sort of guide her though, instead of Kiyoha kinda welling up her feelings of discomfort at seeing how much Utsusemi had to entertain her despite both their grievances. But I guess confrontation isn’t something anyone can do so easily when it comes to both their standings… I wonder how Utsusemi feels about the possibility of him actually being the heir of Utsusemiya (restaurant) who was kidnapped as a young kid… I mean, he’s obviously lonely despite what he says, and that’s why he wants the people around him to like him, so he tries his best to keep it like that, but how does he really feel about all this? And why is Yoko so…cunning? She’s only appeared twice but I’ve had enough of her tbh lol. You know, it’s really interesting. We all know what Utsusemi’s job is, we all know he has to accept many clients and do the same things he does with Kiyoha with other people, it was also obvious that Yoko the annoying lady had started seeing Utsusemi at Ohgiya, but when it came to actually seeing it like that, I think my heart honestly hurt a lot just like Kiyoha’s did. I think the game really showed well how knowing and understanding what his job is can be very different to actually seeing it, especially when it’s someone you know. I seriously don’t know what is Yoko’s problem though, like lady, do you want to lose this business connection? What benefit do you have in insulting Kiyoha like this? So glad Kiyoha slapped him when he asked her to come to talk but instead kept trying to force himself on her, like dude, come to your senses and stop ignoring what’s happening around you! Well, that’s a bit crazy, to think that his “parents” want him to marry Yoko and become the heir, like wow, the moment you get back your son, all you think about is still your restaurant and business connections? Great family this is. I’m happy that he so honestly told her everything and his feelings though, makes him feel much more trustworthy.

Seeing Ageha sob uncontrollably after presumably dealing with questionable clients really shocked me. I think what was worse was the higher ups in Ohgiya thinking of dumping him because they think it’s impossible for him to properly do his job as a geisha. I can see why Utsusemi would offer up his position of “heir” to Ageha so he can leave this place, especially since it’s not like Utsusemi has any attachment to these so called parents that are just constantly hassling him to leave and be their heir, like wow, before you do all that, do you want to maybe act like parents and ask how your son has been and maybe like try to bond with him now? They’re so selfish, it’s ridiculous. It’s understandable why Gakuto was so mad at Utsusemi though, every geisha hopes to one day be released from this job and yet Utsusemi is throwing this chance away for Ageha, and not only that, but he’ll be giving up forever the fact that he is really their son. He will lose both his real parents and his freedom. They may not be the best parents but they’ve barely met again, so I’m sure they can still try and bond to establish a relationship together… I can see why Gakuto changed his mind and decided to go along with Utsusemi’s plan to have Ageha take his place though. If the owner is planning to dismiss Ageha to another geisha house, it’ll probably end up with him going to some place like where Gakuto first started as a geisha. A geisha like Ageha that can’t serve and satisfy clients would be useless to everyone, there’s no way he wouldn’t be sold to a house with terrible conditions, and Gakuto knows that feeling too well to want that to happen to someone he considers a little brother. Honestly, it’s so saddening to see Utsusemi sacrifice his chance for Ageha, but despite the possible regrets and grievances, I honestly think it’s worth it. Mainly because Ageha is a really kind boy. I’m sure he wanted to live up to everyone’s expectations as well, but he just couldn’t. I’m sure he’s more disappointed in himself than anyone, and hates himself that Utsusemi has to make up all these excuses just to make him feel better about taking his place. It’s just so heartbreaking…

Yoko was such a spiteful character though, she literally existed just to torment Kiyoha, so once they announced that Ageha was actually the heir, she just went back to the mainland, like wow, what was her problem, seriously. Honestly, Kiyoha and Utsusemi reminiscing about the start of their relationship was pretty heartwarming, we’ve come a long way! I really do enjoy how much they rely on and support each other now. I can really feel how important they are to the other. Ageha was able to come to terms with everything quite well, so I’m happy for him even if he does have to live a life that is fake but more free than here. I was really glad that Utsusemi finally cried in front of Kiyoha though. He was obviously holding it in trying his best to hide it even when it was obvious to everyone. He’s right though, the good thing that came out of this was for Utsusemi to find out that his parents didn’t abandon him, and that they’ve actually been looking for him all these years. But I guess although it’s saddening, it’s true that if he went back with his parents, he wouldn’t be able to be with Kiyoha since he would have to go to the mainland with them, so in a sense, it is worth it. Finding someone like Kiyoha who could form such a deep bond with him even as a geisha and do her best to support him all the time and give him such comfort is a difficult bond to come by in life. I’m really so happy for Kiyoha and Utsusemi though. It took another month or two, but they got to be together as true husband and wife outside Yoshiwara! He’s free, real and truly free. The extras were pretty cute too.

Honestly, I enjoyed Utsusemi’s route much more than I thought I would! I thought it might be boring since it seemed like Utsusemi was so nice and casual and everything, so it seemed like it might be a normal romance or something, but surprisingly, it was pretty deep! Like, aside from minor gripes such as Yoko’s existence being there just to spite Kiyoha and Utsusemi’s relationship, I did enjoy the dilemma of this route and how it was all related to the fact of how Utsusemi became a geisha, and the difficult choice of choosing between something he always wanted as a child or the life he wanted now. It was also interesting to see how self sacrificing he was. Utsusemi always says that his kindness is something that is just there because he doesn’t want to be disliked or abandoned (since he always thought he was abandoned as a child) but even if it did stem from back then, it’s obvious that it’s a strong part of him now regardless of how it came about. He’s a kind guy through and through that can’t help but put others before himself. Although I’m kinda sad that Ageha never really got a choice of a “good” life because his only choices were really between a “fake” or crappy life, and even then, Gakuto and Utsusemi already decided it for him, I mean, of course it was the best choice for him, but at the same time, it was still saddening to see. Every time he called Utsusemi’s parents father and mother, it honestly felt really heartbreakingly cold. I kinda hoped to see something like Ageha fulfilling the promise that he would live a happy life just like them in the sequel but oh well. I still find it a bit saddening that Utsusemi will never be able to be “their son” but at the same time, he’s happy so there’s really nothing to complain about I guess. But yeah, overall, I really liked how Utsusemi and Kiyoha came to trust and support each other in the end, and how they relied on each other, I thought they really connected naturally and well as a couple. It was also pretty interesting in terms of plot because I really enjoyed how bittersweet everything felt, and how even though it was a “happy ending”, it also wasn’t really one.

#the men of yoshiwara #the men of yoshiwara ohgiya

[ducktracy]

94. viva buddy (1934)

release date: december 12th, 1934

series: looney tunes

director: jack king

starring: billy bletcher (pancho), jack carr (buddy)

jack king’s last buddy cartoon of 1934, the next cartoon being a ben hardaway entry. our adventurer buddy finds himself in mexico, but trouble arises when pancho, a caricature of wallace beery, shoots up a cantina.

hmm, it seems buddy’s hair is greased again? spoiler: cookie’s in this short, and she’s with her new redesign. who knows. buddy strolls through the streets of mexico, strumming his guitar and singing like always. just a collection of visual gags like always as he strolls the streets, walking up a wagon and crushing a duck, sliding down a ton of sombreros on top of a man’s head. the usual.

his destination? “CANTINA EL MOOCHER”. i KNEW there were going to be some stereotypes. buddy struggles to get inside as everyone’s snoring blows the doors open. haha! man, so funny! buddy enters through a window, everyone asleep. a game of checkers is engaged only by some mexican jumping beans on the tiles.

buddy tosses a coin in a man’s mouth, who plays the piano with his feet. everyone is thusly prompted to wake up, the cantina full of life as beer is served and a group of singers sing, the lead singer strumming a corset instead of a guitar. buddy even shows off his guitar kills, playing with his teeth and hands. the man can do everything! he’s a wunderkind! the guitar comes to life and plays itself as buddy eagerly dances along, playing it once more while doing a handstand and kicking his feet together to the beat of the music.

gunshots welcome a scene change as a man darts on his hours around town, shooting aimlessly. he urges his gang to follow, and we have a shot of a bunch of men shooting guns while riding in a car... and a nice pan out to reveal they’re carrying sides of the car and running with their feet fred flinstone style. the yosemite sam wannabe shoots various pots of tequila, one in a poster and one in reality. just because he can, right?

his poor horse attempts to flee, but the villain ties him up to a post, licking the horse’s tail to flatten it enough so it’ll go through the hole in the post. a nefarious mustache tug and a physical lift of the doors (like lifting a garage door) and the menace is inside the cantina.

various gunshots to accompany a grand entrance. the residents of the cantina recognize him instantly, exclaiming “pancho!” as he shoots around—shaving off some man’s hair, shooting a barrel with a man inside who shouts “pancho!”, another repeating the routine in a cash register, and my favorite: the marx brothers emerge from a murphy bed, introducing themselves as “zeppo!” “harpo!” “chico!” “groucho!” great gag!

pancho even targets buddy, blowing his banana to smithereens. that does it! buddy gives him a piece of his mind for ruining his fill of potassium, squirting the remains of the banana right in pancho’s laughing face. pancho holds buddy and gun point and backs him into the piano, ordering him to play.

ah, cookie’s here too for some reason! of course! she does a flamenco dance to accompany buddy’s piano music. the dance is cute, but not timed well to the sound effects of the castanets at all. i think it may have been reused from how do i know it’s sunday, too. pancho applauds the performance, clicking his gun holsters together and skating on his spurs. he spots cookie and flirts for her, asking for a “nice kiss”. cookie gives him a nice slap in the face, sending him skating backwards on his spurs outside, lodging himself in the door.

a nearby goat bucks pancho back INSIDE, where he continues to flirt like nothing happened. buddy grunts “that big bozo!” and lodges a fork right in pancho’s butt. two suction cups attached together (what we all need, right?) cover pancho’s pistols, who cries “CARAMBA!” and tosses his pistols to the floor. in retaliation, he summons a whip and snags buddy, dumping him right into his sombrero and giving a good ol’ billy bletcher villain laugh. it’s tried and true, but billy bletcher does do a great villain! that’s why he was the original peg-leg pete! well, from the 30s through the 50s, anyway. i think walt may have voiced him prior.

pancho yanks buddy out of the hat, who punches his stomach repeatedly upside down. a parrot cheers on the fight—i can’t tell if it says apricot or uppercut. i’d like to THINK it says “give him an uppercut! give him an uppercut!” but it sounds like “give him an apricot!” maybe just a dated reference that’s been lost to the sands of time. considering looney tunes’ humor (and the vaudeville performers of the day) the latter is a plausible option. buddy holds onto a chandelier as pancho swings him around by his feet, nice animation as the two fly off the chandelier and land into a shelf. the two pop out of the debris, and pancho, suddenly friendly, puts his arm around buddy and laughs “i was only foolin’, buddy!”, iris out as the two laugh it off.

unsatisfying as the ending was, i loved it. what a way to totally backtrack from the entire events of the cartoon! though it is a bit of a cop out from a “proper” ending, i suppose. that doesn’t bother me, but i can certainly see how that would be a problem. this cartoon was okay, nothing too great. the “lazy/sleepy” stereotypes were cringeworthy and annoying and detracted slightly from my enjoyment of the cartoon, though there isn’t too much to enjoy. buddy was cute, but not particularly charming or charismatic. pancho was full of personality and billy bletcher’s vocal performance definitely held my interest. the music was good, backgrounds good, animation decent... just another buddy cartoon that’ll be soon lost from my memory bank. probably safe to skip it, nothing too exciting.

link!

#lt #viva buddy #reviews #long post #racism m #bc of the stereotypes

[polandspringz]

“Apply pressure, i’ll be back soon.” I'm just letting you pick ocs at this point

Okay so this story isn’t going to make much sense cause I rushed it and it takes place in the middle of the narrative I’ve been drafting for my real OCs, like the ones I keep mostly under wraps because I have been planning and working on a full series of work for them. Also, it’s self indulgent so it’s really not like my best work, just me trying to cram all my ideas into one scene. 

My hands brushed against the fabric of my skirt, dusting off dirt as I got to my feet. His gray eyes were staring up at me wide, shimmering with worry so uncharacteristic of him. I felt my skin grow tight when my lips parted and my stiff voice rasped out-

“Apply pressure, I’ll be back soon.”

I trudged away with my fists clenched at my sides, leaving him alone beside the log and the campfire. The shelter we had found was a small clearing amongst the barren, scraggly trees of autumn, mowed down by travelers from the past who had dragged logs over to form the circle to sleep in. They were most likely people I had never encountered before, people who had lived long before us, groups of them over time who had paved it for the next nomadic group to rest. I reached the end of the clearing where a tall, dried out piece of brush stood in my way. The fire crackled behind me, the wind brushed my cheek.

Still, I liked to imagine that maybe this place was made only by us, for us by our numerous runs at this world.

I stepped over the sticks and found my way back through the forest, searching for the tracks that led to where the cultists had run off to. I was foolish thinking that I could do right in this timeline, if anything, my thoughts were more cluttered than ever, the voices of the other two fading in and out whenever some event lined up with me. 

Like now, I could feel a searing headache come on and I had to take a knee as I leaned against a tree for support. There was a twinkling behind my eyelids, something pale, silver, with a hint of blue that I could hear chiming as her voice came through.

“Dreil, it’s happened, hasn’t it?” She was crying.

“Torinoko,” I coughed weakly, “Yeah, I… I guess that’s the one thing I can’t fix… haha…”

“We could always try another route… We could try it again and maybe-”

“No,” another voice cut in, and the pain tripled in my brain. I bit back a scream and instead sunk deeper against the earth, leaning forward as I clutched at my scalp with both hands, “That is not the promise you made to me. You said this would be the final time.”

“How nice of you to join us, Rell,” I hissed out. Now there was white flashing behind my eyelids, but opening my eyes was too much effort, even if the darkness of the night sky and shadowy woods would have been much more calming. 

“You both promised me this would be the final run. That my friends and I wouldn’t suffer anymore after this. You would help us be free.”

“Yes, and that’s the plan, Rell, but-”

“You realize that they remember times we don’t, don’t you? We can only remember a handful, but they’ve been getting tortured and ripped apart every round, they’ve had to watch their friends die and their own vessels stabbed and shot and clawed open without peace. We have to do this for them, we have to stop it now or else-”

“Rell,” Torinoko’s voice had an edge to it, although it was still warbly with her crying, “Oniy and Alzol aren’t the only ones who have suffered.”

She hesitated, and I could almost see her behind her house, holding that basket outside staring up at the blue dome that domed over the metal walls of her homeland. 

“Of course I know that, but they’ve been the ones who have to endure the most every route and each time I see it and-”

“Then don’t go!” I shouted, slamming a fist against the trunk of the tree, “You don’t have to go and watch! You can just stay in your little house, stay oblivious and excommunicated from everyone with your fake little family and let Torinoko and I handle it.”

“You know very well that it won’t work like that.”

“Who are you to say anything?” I managed to crawl along the forest floor, continuing on my path, “I’m the one who gets Alzol and Oniy sent to the prison in the capital, it was always my own stupid panic that caused it. I just won’t do it this time. You can stay in your little house and they’ll stay away from jail. Mierre won’t get her deranged hands on them anytime during this route.”

She scoffed, voice shaking, “You really think that’s all it’s going to take?”

“I’m almost at the capital city, I’m going to do my best to stop Yule and hopefully protect both Sawako and Aaya. But, if we can stop this all before we ever have to go to the capital, that’s better for me. I’m sick of seeing Cel flinch when we get near, of seeing Shi die under rubble I sent crumbling.” Torinoko reported.

“Then it’s settled,” I said, “Now get out of my head, I have work to do.”

“You’re delusional,” Rell cried, “You’re both so foolish!”

“Shut up already. What makes you think it’s not going to work?”

“Because Mierre has already been visiting my house! She’s going to take me north whether I want to or not! Because she already targeted your town! She already had her soldiers wipe out everyone! Torinoko and Shi’s ‘deaths’ have already happened! Nothing’s changed from before!”

“Things have changed, I know how to control my powers so-”

“You’re lying. If you already knew how to control them, then why did you let Xir and Vei die?”

Red exploded around me as I flared up, exploding as a wave of power surged out from me and two trees came careening down. I had punched the earth and a black vortex opened up, the moonlight reflecting on it and making it sparkle inside.

“Shut up, you don’t know anything about me.”

“Oh? And here I thought we all shared a soul? You yourself said that it was the ‘one thing you couldn’t fix’, but you forgot about everything else-”

“I fixed Torinoko and Shi’s disappearance. I didn’t let it weigh me down and I helped Seio cope with Mierre’s disappearance. We started our journey a month earlier-”

“Oh, a month? What a big change!”

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“There shouldn’t have even been another journey, Dreil! If you really wanted to stop everything, really wanted to end it all, you shouldn’t have even let them leave, shouldn’t have let Mierre roll her plan out! You shouldn’t have done anything!”

“What are you saying?”

“Don’t you realize it?! As soon as you woke up, you had a choice. You killed those men in the shelter again, maybe that was preventable, but you didn’t have to go with Seio, you didn’t have to go to the house, you didn’t have to become another cog in Mierre’s plans.”

“If I hadn’t gone with them, she still would have gone after you! I have to be in the capital to stop her from using you-”

“No, you’re using me. Don’t you realize it, Dreil? All of this could have been stopped if you just talked to her, stopped her, grabbed her before she ran out of the house and started her charade and parade of fire. If you had just stopped her before everything was set into motion, then nothing would have happened! But, no you had to go and-”

She stopped suddenly, and I felt myself freeze up when her voice came back with a sinister sounding, “Oh.”

“Rell? What’s wrong?” Torinoko tried, but was ignored.

“I get it. I see now. You want this to happen.” 

“What? Of course not!”

“Yes, yes you do. You don’t want to help anyone, you only want to help yourself. I see it now. Even back at the house, you were saying how Seio wasn’t really giving you the time of day, things were falling into place even back then, and you knew that! You knew things weren’t changing even though you were smarter now, showed your prowess earlier, you realized everyone was still fulfilling the same events, but you didn’t do anything to stop it because you wanted this!”

“You think I want to see my friends, all of you die?!” I balled my hands up in the wet dirt.

“No, but you want to reach Smokeflake, don’t you?”

My heart stopped. I felt Torinoko’s connection spike for a moment before it came crashing down. Rell continued, her voice carrying a sinister smile with it.

“If you reach Smokeflake, if you go to Smokeflake, you get all the time in the world with him. With your family. Sometimes it’s six months… sometimes it’s two years… Sure, you have a fight for moment, but after that, you two are practically like a married couple! You’re ‘learning how to use your powers’ right? So you have to stay there, and if you stay there, Seio will communicate with Mierre and she’ll hold off on enacting her plan fully until you have reached your potential because she wants to make sure she gets all of the power embedded in me… You were planning on staying there and pretending your power wasn’t ever controllable forever weren’t you?”

“Not forever!” I slapped my hands over my mouth, but it was too late, “That’s a lie… Do you really think I would do such a thing and let you suffer for that long?!” 

“Yes.”

It was Torinoko’s voice this time.

“Dreil, I… you went and did it to Seio’s arm? Didn’t you?”

“Dreil?”

I stiffened, turning around. Seio was standing behind me, his hair bloody and stained brown in the moonlight. He was holding some cloth over his left arm, now engorged flesh rippling with spasms and something powerful pulsating underneath it. 

“Are you alright? I heard shouting and… did you knock down those trees? Did someone attack you?”

He started towards me, but I held up my hand, stopping him. I steadied my breathing, letting my power slowly drain away. Washing over me, my skin darkened back to its normal color, my hair dyed itself back to that light brown instead of the ghostly white. My eyes took longer to adjust, but eventually the red fell away too and I was left with the cold feeling of the night around me. I sighed and looked up at him properly, and managed a smile even though I saw the fear still lingering. I glanced at his arm, and moved towards him, trying to be slow enough and ignore the way he stepped back.

“I just got a little spooked in the dark, sorry.”

“Are you feeling better now?” He said as I reached out to touch the flesh I had ripped apart. Even though I had tried to stop it, like every time in my memory, when Xir and Vei fell and then Seio began to stumble, I erupted, and even though I ripped through the flesh of our enemies in the same amount of time in the same way, even though I felt Seio approaching me, I still let my anger ripple through him and up his fingers, his hand, and into his arm. I hadn’t thought of it at the time, but maybe Rell was right. Maybe subconsciously, I had selfishly done it all so I could relive our time in Smokeflake again.

I had sacrificed my two friends I had longed to save just so I could live in dreamworld a bit longer.

“Dreil, are you okay? You’re crying!”

“Huh? Oh, am I? Sorry about that, I… I just…” I quickly wiped my eyes with the back of my sleeve, “I know that you must be feeling much worse than I but I promise you if you give me a bit I’ll be able to reverse whatever I did to your arm and-”

Seio shook his head, and reached forward with his good hand, pulling me close to him in a hug, tucking my head under his chin. I was careful not to lean too close to his injury.

“I don’t want you to feel guilty about this, we’ll go to Smokeflake and meet the person my father knew who can help. You don’t need to feel obligated to fix this, Dreil.”

“But, I-”

“It’s not your job to fix this. You don’t have to fix anything. Just rest.”

My hands twitched behind his back for a moment, before I leaned in the rest of the way, and fisted them in the fabric of his torn cape and sobbed.

Later that evening, I tapped into our connection once more, reaching out when I was sure Seio was asleep and we were both lying down inside our shared tent. I only felt Torinoko register from the gray specks floating around.

“Where’s Rell?” I whispered.

“I don’t know, I can’t feel her either. I think she might have…”

“This is all my fault, I’m sorry. I was selfish, and everything she said was right and-”

“Dreil, I may be upset with you, but… I can’t blame you, because I’ve also made some choices this time that have set us up on the same path. I’m starting to wonder if these things are things we can stop or if they really are inevitable. Maybe our goal was too lofty when we said we would save everyone.”

“Heh… Maybe…”

“But still, even if Rell has decided to leave us, I won’t leave your side. You’ve done too much for Shi and I, and I still remember how we… well, you felt when you thought we had died for the first time. I know you love me, and I love you too. I won’t fault you for taking extra time in Smokeflake. It seems like no matter, events are locked into place.”

I tossed my arm over my eyes and rolled onto my back.

“Sorry, I don’t want to talk about this anymore. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Dreil. I’m sorry.”

I woke up in the morning to Seio shaking me and trying to heave me out of the tent with one arm. Blearily, I thought we were being attacked, and snapped into my awakened state, but froze when I heard other voices surrounding me, mingling outside.

Seio’s morning greeting blurred into the background as did his smiling figure as I clawed past him and the tent door out into the daylight, rolling out into the embrace of my two scratched up, bloodied, but alive friends.

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…” I blubbered helplessly as they clutched at me.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“You saved us, don’t you realize it? You healed us.”

“It just took a little bit for the power to settle in and do its work.”

“I’m dreaming. This has to be a bad dream, a cruel joke. I don’t… I don’t deserve this when I-”

“You’re awake, and we’re all alive, I promise,” Xir laughed, leaning in next to my ear as his voice changed slightly, “It seems you will have us joining you in Smokeflake too this time. I hope you don’t mind.”

“No,” I sobbed as I wrapped my arms around his neck, “No, that’s a welcome change, believe me.”

Seio still didn’t let me heal his arm, but it was pushed to the back of my mind for now. I was too elated and shaky from the revelation that I hadn’t failed, that had saved two of my friends, that I had changed something. Rell and Torinoko were wrong, things were changing, this was the route we were destined to be on, and it was possible.

We we’re going to save everybody, even if it wasn’t immediate.

#ask poland #my writing #my ocs #writing #ocs #ask prompt

[fandomlife-giver]

Toxic Veins (Alucard x OC): Ch 4

(Hey loves, this took a while to actually finish, I actually started editing it two weeks ago haha. I hope you all enjoy!)

Warnings: Violence, Torture, Child abuse, Language

Pairings: Alucard x OC

Word Count: 3696

PHYRE

♪The other night dear, as I lay sleeping♪

Once that first tear broke free, the rest followed in an unbroken stream. I bent forward where I sat on the floor and pressing my palms to the mat, I began to cry with the force of a person vomiting on all fours.

♪I dreamed I held you in my arms♪

"Phyre?" I rose my head up, and through my blurry vision, I saw a figure run into the room and crouch down to me. Seconds later, the presence of long arms was wrapped around me. "Sweetie, what's wrong?"

I knew that voice. That sweet voice that calmed me in my never-ending abyss of darkness. That shining light that pulled me through.

I turned my head, but only slightly, to be met with those bright violet eyes, that now held concern and worry. "It's okay, honey. Mommy's here."

♪But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken♪

"Zinnia! Get over here and make me my dinner, now!" I flinched at the ear-pounding volume of his voice and a flash of fear ran through those eyes as she quickly released me.

"C-coming, dear!" She gave a smile, before standing up and running out of the room.

I savored that warm feeling I had with her. That I always had with her. But...when he walked by and stopped at the door, my blood ran cold.

He turned to me and displayed his sinister teeth as he pulled out a very large and very sharp blade that gleamed at me as if it was grinning at me.

My breathing turned into rapid gasps as I crawled away and quickly stood up. But, a yelp of pain escaped me as he ran up behind me and locked my arms behind my back while keeping an arm at my neck.

"Hey, sis. You like my new toy?"

He brought the tip of the blade to the outer shell of my eye, centimeters away from touching it, but he did manage to prick the single tear that formed over my glazed eyes.

His laughter stopped my breathing. "No? Let me show you what I can do with it."

What? H-he's not gonna…

"Ahhhhhhh!!!" The piercing coldness of the blade left a hot patch on my right shoulder.

Another chuckle echoed in the room. "You know something, Phyre? You're really pretty. And innocent. And delicate, like a flower. That's all you'll ever be."

"Baaah! P-please, Lucan, stop!!! It hurts!!"

"You're weak! Pathetic! And now, my dear flower, you will have the mark to prove it."

♪So I hung my head and I cried♪

As the never-ending burning torture seemingly continued, I soon realized there was no stopping it. I was weak. I couldn't stop him. So, I let my tears fall, I let my heart be swallowed up by the darkness, and my head fell.

All I saw through the fuzziness was the floor and the salty wet droplets that fell onto it.

°°°

*gasp*

With a dropped jaw, buggy eyes, and sweaty palms my hot, salty head popped up from my warm pillow in a heart-pounding state of emergency. After a second of massively intense panic where I zoom into brain-rushing, adrenaline-gushing overdrive, it just suddenly just dawns on me…

It was all just a dream.

It was all just a dream.

It was all just a dream.

"Sleep well?"

My hand shot out from under my pillow, my senses now fully awakened as I aim my pistol at the intruder in the dark corner of my room.

"Did you know you whisper as you sleep? Funny, I saw you as being a sleepwalker."

That voice. It's a deep voice. So, I'm pretty sure it's not Integra.

Definitely not Walter, he's too proper to sneak into someone's room. That leaves…

"Alucard." My groggy voice whispered into the darkness.

I allowed my eyes to fully adjust, so I saw the figure sitting in a chair, no longer wearing his hat or goggles, until I dropped my arm on my bed. My eyes rolled as I fell back on the soft bed and sighed.

He grinned as I let my eyelids flutter shut and snuggled into my pillow. "I didn't know you had a kink for watching girls sleep."

His grin had stretched further. "I simply enjoy the peacefulness of hearing your soft snores."

A small smile made its way on my lips. "Yeah. Whatever you say, Edward Cullen."

The dark laughter that came from echoed in my ears. "You are evermore interesting, my beloved flower."

I unintentionally flinched as my eyes opened back up. "What?"

I heard a creek, then silence. I'm assuming he stood up. "You are very intriguing, my-"

"W-Why did you call me that?" My cursed stuttering voice betrayed me.

The silence only fueled my curious, yet impatient emotions. That was until I felt a soft material slowly run up the base of my arm.

Is he...stroking me?

"What are you doing?" He didn't seem to hear me-that or he was just ignoring me.

"So warm...and smooth...and soft..."

My brows had furrowed at this point. "Um...shouldn’t you be checking up on the new recruit?"

His hand traveled up to where I felt his gloved hand lightly caress my face. It was as if he was afraid he'd break me. "My dear...my queen...my beloved flower..."

What is he talking about-wait, wh-what is he…

I felt his hand travel downwards from my neck to my collarbone, and then lower, until...

Woah!

I slapped his hand away and quickly got out of bed. "You're getting too friendly there, Count Chocula."

"Am I interrupting something?"

Bah! What the-

I turned around and sighed at the blonde leaning in the doorway with Walter right behind her.

"Interrupting? Oh, you mean the Vampire that not only watches girls in their sleep but also gets a good feel of them. That about sums it up, ri-"

I turned to the culprit, but surprise, surprise, he was not there.

Walter and Integra looked at each other, while I was just about ready to kill everyone.

"Aaaaaah!"

My brows furrowed as I looked around for the source of the scream while Integra smirked. "It seems our newest recruit has awakened."

I rolled my eyes and walked over to my dresser, then proceeded to shrug on my trench coat, slip into my boots, then put on my gloves. As I went to walk out of my room, I stopped.

Did I forget something? Sunglasses...oh!

I went back to my bed and grabbed my pistol. And once again as I went to leave the room, Integra blocked me.

I rose an eyebrow at her, but she only reached behind her and pulled out a belt.

Why would she pull out a belt? I hope it's not hers.

I looked down, but her pants did not fall off. Well, that's a relief.

I looked back up as she held the belt out to me. That was when I noticed the large Hellsing symbol carved in the buckle that was in the center.

I pointed at that symbol. "What's that?"

She wrapped the belt around my waist, which I did not expect, then buckled it and took out her cigar. "Your work I.D."

My eyebrows rose up as I looked down at the buckle, then up at her. She placed the cigar back in her mouth, then turned and walked away.

"Let's go, Phyre. We need to brief her before Alucard scares her off."

By the mention of his name, I sighed, but still followed. By the time we reached the room, the door was wide open.

"Wooooooaaaaaah!"

We all walked in and saw the girl Alucard had rescued, screaming, and of course, Alucard was standing by her bed with a huge grin.

"You're too loud! Police girl. I don't care if you are a vampire. You're still English. Have some manners."

The sound of Integra's voice made the short blonde look up, then plop down to bury her head in her knees. After a few seconds, she looked back up at the group of people in her room.

"So I'm a vampire...Sorry, but where am I?"

I smirked at the clueless vampire and gestured to her surroundings. "This is our headquarters. We're called the Hellsing organization. Basically, we are the monsters that protect England from the other monsters."

Her eyes widened. "So you're telling me...you're saying that I'm..."

I looked at Walter from the corner of my eye as he walked forward and held out a yellow Hellsing uniform. "Given your condition, you'll be working for us from now on. We've received a word of a string of vampire attacks. Go and kill the vampire, police girl."

I rose an eyebrow while the girl's eyes widened. "Wait, y-you want me to do what?"

I looked at Integra like she was crazy. "Subtleness isn't particularly your area of expertise, is it?"

She crossed her arms. "What do you mean by that?"

"What do I-The last memory she has is dying by a gunshot from that-" I extended a finger to Alucard, who was still grinning. "-She wakes up to find him beside her, and to top it off, gets informed the very man that killed her had turned her into a vampire. And now, you put her to work not even 5 minutes after she wakes up?"

There was a long moment of silence of just Integra looking at me, then Alucard, then the girl, then Walter, and finally back to me. "And your point being?"

What the hell is wrong with these people?

"Wh-I jus-you know what? I'll be in the car." I threw my arms up and with a huff, I walked out of the room.

But, I did happen to catch Walter commenting, "It is very nice having miss Laurifer back again, isn't it?"

°°°

The sun had gone to rest, the moon took his place as the darkness began to surround me. I have always liked the night, it hid my flaws, my imperfections, the scars burned onto my flesh, the stabs of knives left behind.

The woods always look different at night. Even with the glasses, everything has an unfamiliar slant to it. As if the daytime trees and flowers and stones had gone to bed and sent slightly more ominous versions of themselves to take their places.

When darkness fell, everything was at its true beauty and it was simply perfect.

'The target is moving north on Route 17 butchering whole households along the way! One has separated from the others, slaughtering twice the number of households! Do not leave a single freak standing!'

Unfortunately, by the very lovely voice of my new employer, who still hasn't paid me yet, I was reminded that I haven't gotten that vacation and I still had to work.

*sigh* It was nice while it lasted.

I sat up in the moving topless vehicle and looked over the men who also occupied it as they readied their weapons and checked for spare ammo. They were certainly better than those so-called "men", or "soldiers", or my favorite, "fearless defenders of the crown" I had the honorable joy of riding with earlier.

I glanced over at the blonde that was clutching the large gun, provided by Walter, and clenching her teeth.

"Are you prepared for what is about to happen? Just because Integra expects you to be, doesn't mean you have to pretend you are."

She looked at me in surprise and a bit of embarrassment. "I'm sorry, ma'am, I didn't mean to-"

"Ma'am?"

I looked at her with a dropped jaw, which made the match I had been chewing on fall from my mouth.

"Ma'am?!"

She jumped at the volume of my voice and stumbled over her words. "I-Uh, I was-I didn't-"

"Let me ask you something: do you enjoy being called ‘police girl’?"

"Um, well, not really-"

"Well guess what? I understand I may have a wrinkle or two, but that I certainly do not enjoy being called. So, let's make a deal, hm?"

Her frightened face turned into a one of confusion. "Um..."

"How about this-you call me by my name, the one I was given the day I was created, and I do the same, alright?"

"S-sure, alright. Then, may I have your name, please?"

I heavily sighed and took out a match from its book, and placed it between my lips. "Well, my official title, given by her majesty, is Sir Phyronela Cedrica Manchester Laurifer, but only select few, now including you, know that. But, I do go by just Phyre Laurifer."

Her jaw opened. "You were knighted by Queen Victoria?"

Well, yes, I believe I just said that.

I shrugged my shoulders. "Yes, I believe when you are made a knight of the round table, it is required."

She nearly dropped her gun, which I am pretty sure would've crushed the man’s leg that was in front of her. "You are a member of the Knights of the Round Table?"

I slowly nodded. Again, just said that.

"Yes. Now, enough about me, what is your name? And don't be shy, I just told you a highly guarded secret. It's only fair."

"Oh! It's um, Seras Victoria, Sir Phyronela."

Ew. No, we're not doing that.

"Do you have cotton in your ears? Are you partially deaf?"

"No."

"Then perhaps you choose not to listen. All know me by Phyre Laurifer."

"I'm sorry, miss Laurifer, I will try t-"

"Oh god, no. You are not Walter, so save the formalities. You will call me by my name, which is Phyre, and I will call you by your name, which is Seras. Alright?"

"Of course, um, Phyre."

Ah. That is much better.

"Well, now that that is settled..." I stood up in the moving vehicle and turned on my GPS signal, then pressed the small button behind my ear. "This is Laurifer, I'm advancing pursuit of rogue 3. Do you copy?"

'Copy that, Agent Laurifer. Would you like a briefing on the current pursuit?'

"Fill me in later. You're my eyes and ears, where is the target's location now?"

'Target is currently residing at the home of 1760 Wilkberry lane, approximately 1 minute and 12 seconds time on foot.'

"I copy."

I looked back at Seras and smirked. "Good luck on your first day. You'll need it."

I turned, then leaped off the jeep and rolled on the ground, then stood and began sprinting through the dark wooded forest.

'Rebecca Baron, 23 years of age, reportedly admitted to a psychiatric institution at age 15, the cause of turning-unknown. Recently escaped psychiatric hospitalization after killing 14 members of staff and patients resided. Said to be extremely stealthily and fast-moving. Orders: seek and destroy. Proceed with caution.'

I slowed my feet to a stop as I hopped over the wooden fence of the address and landed in a crouch.

My eyes were locked onto the shadowy figure moving throughout the house. It looked to be lazily walking around, but what I noticed was the sadistic grin and bloodstained clothes she sported.

Well, it appears I've found my doppelganger.

"Target in sight. I'm going in."

°°°

THIRD PERSON

"So both of us will have eternal life!" The fanged boy grinned as he closely held his girlfriend to his chest.

"Invincible vampires forever..." She smiled and leaned in, capturing his lips in a lustful kiss.

*buzz*

The guy pulled away from her and snarled, then pulled out a handgun from his sweatshirt and walked over to stand a few feet from the front door. It's a real shame he did because an entire hoard of bullets was shot through the door, and into the male.

"Aaagh!" The force of the bullets threw him back to fall on the floor in a bloody mess. The door glowed a bright red, then exploded to reveal a tall, shadowy figure.

Alucard shielded himself as the male brought up his gun and fired never-ending amounts of bullets at him. His medical laughter echoed. "Hahahahahahaha!"

However, it soon died down when his chamber emptied and Alucard still stood, in his defensive position.

"You don't know how to change your body into mist or a bat. You can't heal any of your gunshot wounds." He slowly began walking towards him. "And now that you're out of bullets, you can't even defend yourself. You dare to call yourself Nosferatu. You disgust me!"

Alucard's advancing footsteps made the vamp scramble to his feet and stumble to run away.

Alucard only watched with a sinister smile as he aimed his gun and fired multiple rounds over and over again, pinning him to the wall.

The male's screams filled the room but were drowned out by the gunfire. Once it ceased, Alucard ran his hand through the vamp's chest. He screamed a final time, before disintegrating in a flash of light.

Alucard snarled in victory, then placed his gun back in his holster and turned to walk out of the slaughtered house.

"Your turn, police girl."

°°°

Seras perked up from where she sat on the roof. "Yes, sir."

She looked ahead at the Vampire girl that was running from the house and down the road.

'What are you waiting for? Do it!'

"Sir, she is already five...no, six hundred meters away."

'Imagine a third eye. On your forehead, aim from there. If you shoot like a human, then you're going to miss like a human.'

"But sir..."

'Aim right for her heart. Don't worry. You'll put the bullet right through her.'

She squinted out into the darkness as she kept her sniper gun in position. "But it's so dark, and I don't have a scope."

She was oblivious to the floating Alucard that watched from behind her.

'That's a human complaint. Now, it's time to make the shot like a proper vampire!'

As Seras blinked, her eyes turned blood red and her sight stretched far across the road, giving her a clear view of the Vampire that was running away.

She clenched her teeth and pulled back the trigger.

*click* *click* *click*

Her eyes widened. "I-it's empty!"

That was when she noticed the figure sitting in a tree 15 feet from the running girl.

°°°

PHYRE

I must've waited 10 minutes, at least, for Seras to make her big opening to show off the worthy vampire she had become.

I knew since the beginning she was different from the worthless monsters I had ripped apart. I wouldn't trust my own colleagues with the knowledge of my true name, let alone one of the things I kill for a living.

But she is definitely someone worthy of the gifts she was given.

And once I noticed her gun refused to fire, I soon realized she has a long way to go until she realizes what she is truly capable of.

The target had passed me by this time. I watched her just a bit longer, before pulling out my pistol and placing it over the arm that was resting over my bent knee.

My eyes squinted in concentration. And then…

*bang*

The bullet pierced through her. Blood splattered all around, her beanie was thrown from her head and her body slid to a stop over the gravel.

I smirked, then jumped down from the tree I had been waiting in and walked out onto the road to stop in front of her body.

And...just to make sure, I kicked her arm...and her back...and her stomach, only to make sure, but she didn't move.

"Target has been terminated."

°°°

SERAS

The figure walked out into the open and who it was made my eyes fully widen. I-it was Miss Laurifer. No, it was Phyre!

And then, I realized I could actually see her...It's pitch-black, yet I can see more clearly than in daylight.

'That was a good shot. Check your magazines and better luck next time, police girl...'

There it is again...And now, I'm hearing voices, like some sort of telepathy.

My eyes tightly shut as a sigh escaped me. "It's all too fast, what on earth I'm becoming?" I looked down at the palm of my hand....I'm…

ALUCARD

How humorous. She didn't even make the kill, yet she already senses a change. If it weren't for my dear flower, the mission wouldn't be finished.

"Not yet...this is only the beginning. And there's a long road ahead of you."

°°°

PHYRE

Of course, after we finally returned, everyone went to bed. And Alucard...ugh...I don't even wanna know what he's doing.

But did I get to fall back on that soft bed? No, I get to lean back against the door to Integra's office as she reviewed the recent vampire reports.

"Too many...Far too many...Suddenly we have far too many vampires causing trouble. Third and fourth rate vampires killing randomly, keeping us busy...Pointless...Cheap...Pathetic acts of barbarism."

It really was something to think about. How could so many of them appear from nowhere? Amateurs that kill, not to feed, but for fun. And not only that, but they are all random people who haven't appeared to be true vampires. Only cheap imitations.

"It's as if someone is churning out vampires for a factory line."

She looked up from her screen when I spoke. "Precisely."

She then stood up from her desk and walked in front of it. "That is why I asked for your help. This has become a serious matter and by the Queen's permission, I have been allowed to have you join us."

The Queen's permission?

"You've consulted with Victoria?"

She crossed her arms and leave back against her desk. "She asked for you personally."

Wow. That makes me feel all tingly inside.

"Then, I have no choice. I guess I truly am a part of Hellsing now."

She scoffed. "Don't act as if you never were." She pushed off her desk and turned with her back to me. "Welcome back to the darkness, Phyre."

She looked back at me over her shoulder. "We've missed you."

#hellsing ultimate #hellsing #Alucard #vampire hunter #vampire

[purplesurveys]

453

When was the last time you had a slurpee? I’ve never even tasted one let alone bought one for myself. I’m just iffy about 7-11 machines lmao because I’ve heard so much stories about mold and stuff. What is your favorite television show? Right now I’ve been watching reruns of Friends so that’s my favorite; but I’m also catching up on The Crown and that’s also such a good show too. What holiday will be coming up next? Eid’l Fitr, on June 5. Have you ever done hard drugs before? Never. What is the worst name anyone has ever called you? I don’t know about worst names but I’ve been called horrible adjectives before. Useless, stupid, childish, can’t learn, a headache...name it and my mom has probably used it on me once.

What color are your eyes? Dark brown. What does the last text you sent say? “haha good morning” When was the last time you cried out loud in front of someone? April 27th.  Where is your favorite place to eat out? I don’t have a go-to place; I love food and trying out new food so I always try to make it different when I eat out. Japanese restaurants always give a good vibe though. Does it bother you when people call you 'ma'am' or 'sir?' It used to really bother me when I was younger, because I didn’t like being treated like I was old enough already. I felt the same when servers started to give me an adult’s menu instead of the kiddie ones HAHAHA 

Anyway, it still kinda bothers me today especially if a server/clerk is obviously older than me and technically doesn’t have to call me ma’am, but I can’t think of any alternative for it so I end up not minding it. Have you ever been obsessed with a television character? Monica Geller, Lori Grimes, and Jennifer Lyons, the latter from an 80s show called Perfect Strangers that only like 500 people in the world remember lmao. Do you ever wish you had powers of invisibility? Sometimes. What was the last thing that changed your life completely? Getting accepted into my internship. It didn’t exactly turn my life around but it was just a realization slapped onto my face that I was a grownup now and I’m starting to do grownup things now too. Do you have any step siblings? Nope. Did you partake in senior skip days? I don’t know what that means. Do you have Showtime? We don’t have that here. We do have a noontime show called It’s Showtime hahaha. When was the last time you went to Wal-mart? Never.

Have you ever read the Christian Bible? I’m a Catholic, so I guess we have the bible that adheres to that denomination. And to answer your question, yup. We had to read the bible everyday from grade school to high school. Is there anything you'd like to say to anyone at the moment? Please let me pass your class. Do you tend to cry a lot? I cry easily, so yes. When the holidays come around, do you help decorate? When I was a kid. Now my mom prefers to do it herself. Would you ever consider having an abortion? Probably not. But I wouldn’t know for sure what I’d decide; I’ve never been face-to-face with that situation. What does the majority of clothes in your closet look like? Black, sleeveless, and airy. Has someone ever promised not to leave you? Sure. Do you have a part-time job? I don’t. Do you order clothing offline quite often? So...offline...so like physically buying clothes at a store??? I’m so confused. Sure I’ve done that but if it means anything else lmao then I’m not so sure. Are you the type of person who likes to buy gifts for your friends? I really would if I had more money, but I’m always on a budget and the rest of my savings goes to relationship stuff like dinners and cinema tickets. My friends deserve everything in the world though and I wish I could treat them :( Have you ever lived in an apartment before? No, I haven’t. Have you ever been questioned by the police? Nah. I’ve been pulled over by traffic officers for clumsy shit I’ve done in the past, but not the police. In which state / country were you born? Manila, Philippines. Are you close to your parents? No. Maybe to my dad, sure; but I don’t even get to see him often. Have you ever had to be put on medicine for a mental disorder? I think I have needed it many times but was never formally on medication or in therapy, so it’s never happened. Would you say you have impressive grammar skills? Sure. Makes no sense for me to last in journ school if my grammar is blah. White chocolate or milk chocolate? I love both, depending on the dessert. Like I prefer milk chocolate on my cookies, but I also like white chocolate on my cake. Have you ever been to an amusement park out of state? Yes. Does your television connection ever go out during your favorite show? I watch my favorite shows online or I have them saved in a hard drive. Would you rather be part of a team or alone? Depends on what it is I have to do.  Do you have a Tumblr? Gee, I wonder what I’m doing on this website... Do you ever eavesdrop on people in hallways? Not really, since I’m always in a hurry. Things I hear are always out of context too so it’s not like I could eavesdrop. Have you ever been punched in the stomach? Maybe by my older cousin as kids. I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s happened then. Is there anyone you'd like to be cuddling with at the moment? Always. Would you consider yourself a crafty person? Not a chance. What would you say is your favorite color of all time? Probably black, but ‘of all time’ is pretty loaded. Chinese or Mexican food? Chinese. What do you normally drink when eating at a fast food restaurant? Just service water, though it smells iffy sometimes. Do you have a crush on anyone at the moment? Yes. Is there something important that you should be doing as of now? Checking my emails, but I’m too anxious to. Have you ever participated in Black Friday shopping? We don’t have that here.   Describe your favorite outfit? Right now, it’s a green flowy floral jumpsuit. My favorites change often though, depending on my mood for that day. What color are your nails painted right now, if any? I get this question all the time, damn. It’s never painted. Have you ever been responsible for someone's death? No. That’s horrible to imagine. What is your biggest fear? Not being able to live the life I’ve always envisioned for myself. What is your favorite website to go on in your spare time? Netflix, YouTube, or Twitter. What do you normally order when you go to Taco Bell? I’ve only been to Taco Bell once. Do you ever spend the night with your significant other? Yeah we do it like once a month at most. What is your favorite number? 4 and 23. Do you know a lot about serial killers? I definitely know more than average, thanks to doing my own research when I have free time and watching shows like Unsolved. Has your life ever been challenged by something huge? I seem to be the magnet for that. Have the police ever been looking for you? No. Where do you get most of your accessories from? They’re mostly gifts, but there’s one Korean accessory shop nearby where I get clip-on earrings. Have you ever been in a car accident? Yeah, twice in my own car. Do you cuss more than any one else you know? Nah, I know pottier mouths. When was the last time you kissed someone who was younger than you? My girlfriend is a month younger than me, if that counts. She’s the only person I’ve ever kissed. How old is your youngest cousin? 3 or 4, I’m not so sure. Are you currently in a happy relationship? Very much so. Where did your last kiss take place and at what time of day? Gab’s bedroom, yesterday afternoon.

How do YOU download music? I don’t. I listen on Spotify. If it’s not on Spotify, I’d look for it on YouTube but that rarely happens.

Do you tend to talk on the phone a lot? Only with my girlfriend. Have there ever been any serial killers around your hometown? I don’t think. It would be a big deal if there were any. When was the last time you went to a museum? :( I can’t tell you...maybe two years ago, when my art studies class required us to go to the campus’ museums. Is heartbreak as bad as it sounds? I don’t think that kind of feeling could ever be captured in words. What was your first job? No job. Do you prefer shades or mini-blinds? Shades. What is the weather like outside? It’s still super hot and humid, but the humidity has turned into heavy rain at nights so it gets cold at night now. Do you ever find yourself talking to someone who isn't even there? I talk to myself, not to anyone who isn’t around. Do you normally have nightmares or good dreams? It’s a good balance. What do people compliment you on the most? Work ethic or my outfits, I can’t really tell what I get more compliments on. Are you jealous of any of your friends? I’ll get envious sometimes, but not jealous. Are you more of an open person or closed to communication? Open. As long as anyone asks, I’m easy to open up. Do you know how to shoot a gun and hit a target? No. Are you a good listener? Sure. I love listening to my friends. What is your favorite drink? Water. What is something you always tend to lose? Socks. Do you buy more things for yourself or others? Myself. If you chew gum, which kind is your favorite? Classic bubblegum always takes me back. Is there anyone you know in which you'd like to simply punch in the face? Yes, one of my college instructors. Do you like listening to foreign music? American and British music are foreign to me, and I listen to a lot of those. What turns you on the most? Neck kisses probs. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? It’s the only kind of kissing I’ve had lmao.

#survey #surveys

[rhnuzlocke]

Episode 20

Scene 9:

[The next day they run into Ty and Gabby in one of the huge caverns. Ty is panning his camera around getting some landscape shots while Gabby sits on the floor nearby sorting through her sound equipment, which she has laid out around her. Ty spots Wally and Ren through the camera before looking up. His face lights up and he taps excitedly on Gabby’s shoulder. He signs to her as Ren and Wally get closer and she stands up and smooths out her clothes.]

Gabby: Hey there Ren, fancy meeting you here. And is that Wally from last time?

[Ty signs “I told you we would catch her if we just hung out here long enough.” Gabby signs back: “shut up! They can both understand sign, remember?”]

Ren: [signing along] Hoping for another interview?

Gabby: You caught us. Those two episodes with you have blown up since the Groudon incident. It’s really boosted our profile and we thought: what better way to strike when the iron is hot than getting another interview before you challenge the Elite Four?

[Ty signs: “pretty please! It would make our careers.” and bats his eyelashes. Gabby signs: “you’re shameless.” and he replies: “I’m excited!”]

Ren: I’ll battle you again. Taraki and I could use the exercise.

Gabby: Thank you so much. We really appreciate it. How about you Wally? We’d love to have you and your shiny gallade on again.

Wally: S-sure.

Gabby: Thanks! You two are the best! Just give us a moment to set up.

[Gabby signs: “you’re a genius. I love you” to Ty as she goes to get her earpieces and he signs: “I love you too” back. Wally slaps his hands over his mouth so as not to squee but his face gets rather red. Gabby hands them each and earpiece, and the duo sends out their pokemon. Nell is now an exploud and AC/DC has evolved into a magnezone.]

Ren: They both evolved!

[Ty signs: “awesome, right?” and Ren signs: “awesome!” back.]

Gabby: AC/DC evolved just a few weeks ago.

Wally: Kai and I watched the episode on our way to Mossdeep. It’s my favorite.

Gabby: Mine too. The big dork over here cried and I got to film it.

[Ty signs: “I was so happy I didn’t even think about us having to invent signs again. We’re still getting the hang of it, but now they can carry me up to get aerial shots and it’s so cool.”]

Ren: That’s so great! One more question before we start though: would you like Wally and I to mega evolve our pokemon? It could be cool, but the battle will probably be over faster.

Gabby: Oh, that’s a tough call. What do you think, Ty?

[Ty signs: “we should go for it.” Gabby smiles and turns back to them.]

Gabby: Alright, let’s do this! [Ty adjust his camera and Gabby gets in position.] Hey there double battle fans! It’s you Dual Pulse hosts Gabby and as always Ty behind the lens. In case you weren’t watching the last episodes, Ty and I have been scoping out the talent in that hallowed place of challenge, Victory Road. Today we are joined once again by [stepping aside to reveal them] Ren Kosugi and Wally Scott! Ren has eight badges and is on her way to fight the Elite Four and maybe even the Champion.

Ren: You bet!

Gabby: And what about you, Wally?

Wally: I have eight badges too, but Ren is my pal, so I’m gonna let her be Champion for at least a few months before taking the title.

Gabby: Whoa! I think Ty and I are in for a beatdown but we’ll do our best! Everyone ready?

[Taraki, Kihei, Nell and AC/DC step forward while their trainers clear the field. Ren and Wally look at each other and touch their keystones, Ren’s in her glove and Wally’s set in his pendant. Taraki and Kihei are consumed by light and mega evolve.]

Gabby: A double battle with double mega evolution. We’re at the highest levels now folks!

Ty: Barrier!

Gabby: Howl!

Ren: Leaf Blade!

Wally: Close Combat!

[The magnezone projects a barrier in front of them while the exploud powers up. Taraki and Kihei smash through it in perfect sync and lay into the exploud and magnezone respectively. The magnezone flinches from the onslaught but the exploud retaliates with a hyper voice that knocks both Kihei and Taraki back. The magnezone targets Kihei with zap cannon, but Taraki absorbs it with his tail, to the shock of all. Ren’s eyes light up and she has Taraki switch targets while Kihei goes after the exploud with another close combat. Taraki dodges around the magnezone’s flash cannon and chips away at it with Leaf blade only to be knocked aside along with Kihei by another hyper voice from the exploud. The magnezone takes the opportunity to nail Taraki with a flash cannon but Kihei comes to his aid and finishes off the Magnezone with a final close combat. By this point Kihei is quite vulnerable and the exploud aims a stomp at him. Taraki catches the blow with an x-scissor and then retaliates with dragon claw. The exploud goes down and Taraki and Kihei return to their normal forms.]

Gabby: What a battle! I can’t believe we got to see two mega evolutions with our own eyes! And mega sceptile’s ability is lightning rod! Jot down that piece of trivia! I’m really proud of how well we held out, but there’s just no topping these two trainers! The whole world better tune in for this Championship!

[They all heal their pokemon and Gabby interviews Ren and Wally. She asks about his necklace and he tells the story, which Gabby loves. Ren and Wally go on their way but they look back and see Ty and Gabby hugging and jumping up and down. Wally dances from foot to foot with excitement as they round the bend out of sight. He pulls out his nav and starts texting rapidly.]

Ren: Are you texting Kai?

Wally: I have to tell someone! Ahhh! Did you see them together? It was sooo cute!

Ren: Haha, yeah.

Wally: I wonder if they’re a couple? They’re never like that on the show.

Ren: Well couple or not, they spend a lot of time together. They must be very close.

Wally: I wanted to ask but it seemed too personal.

Ren: Probably best. You had an easier time with the interview this time around. Actually your confidence has gone through the roof in general. You may want to reign it in a little.

Wally: No!

Ren: So are you going to ask Kai out?

Wally: Oh, um, I don’t know. We’re pretty close now, but I still can’t tell if he likes me or is just super nice. Arceus, I really hope he likes me back. He’s so cute and so smart and he doesn’t treat me like I’m made of glass. I was so worried things would change after Groudon because I scared the shit out of him, but it didn’t. He’s there to help me if I need it but he doesn’t hover and he lets me decide what I can do. Well, he did second guess me a little at the beginning but I told him that it bothered me and he listened. I can’t believe how great he is. I love the sound of his voice and how excited he gets about science and that face he makes…

[Wally gives a dreamy sigh and Ren laughs.]

Ren: Well that’s good because there’s no shutting him up once he gets going.

Wally: He’s perfect!

Ren: No one’s perfect, but I’ll admit he’s pretty great… He might have a thing for you, you know.

Wally: Really?

Ren: Not a hundred percent here, but I was watching the two of you together and It seems like there’s something there. What I can say from experience is that if you wait for him to make a move, you could be waiting a long time. He’s not as brave as you are.

[Wally considers that for a while, staring off into the distance.]

Ren: No rush, man. I really hope it works out though. You two are adorable.

Wally: Wait, does that mean you ship us?

Ren: Oh, uh, I don’t know if—

Wally: You totally do!

[They continue to debate as they and their pokemon disappear around another corner.]

#pokemon #nuzlocke #oras #running hot nuzlocke #story #episode 20 #Ren #Wally #Ty #Gabby #cute overload #do it Wally