#'you!! made me lose my job!'

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME #there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing #and the writing is what i need to be doing #writeblr #this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to #edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol #i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!! #my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means #i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her) #hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong #i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet. #i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse #i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!! #i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO #i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness #and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it #im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us #i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer #and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art. #i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work #even if it means being miserable #but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Let the revenge games begin.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #jin guangyao #nie huaisang #He's gonna call his 5 horse friends up. They have to go on a 14 year long journey to finish the job but by god they will do it. #The sheer chaos in the Audio Drama is really fantastic. Reminds me of those traincar murder mysteries. #The lights go off and there's a scream and then BOOM dead body. Who did that!!! #Okay it was qi deviation and he did it to stop himself from killing his brother. He did it to himself. #JGY sadly has the worst alibi ever though. Both the strongest motivation and also uhhh presence at the scene. #Not to nitpick but as someone who loves murder mysteries - I do feel like even *one* other suspect would have made it stronger. #I get that he tried to make it look like an inevitable Qi Deviation and that it *is* something within the family legacy. #And a big part of NHS figuring it all out comes down to his own perceptiveness and intelligence. #If you weren't close enough to JGY and NMJ of course it looks like an accident. #Sadly 'guy who plays the 'poor little meow meow card'' is also weak to 'guy who plays the 'poor little meow meow card''. #NHS was the better subtle manipulator at the end. That's probably the strongest mystery part of MDZS. And why he's in my top 5. #My man pulled the 'kill him just as he falls from the top of his game and loses everything' gambit and I love him for it.

[velvetjune]

the chapter songs in Alan Wake 2,, flawless

#they deserve more love and discussion #saying this while also not knowing what to say other than they’re so fucking good #alan wake 2 #i think it’s partially because poets of the fall’s tracks are iconic so of course they’re in the spotlight (as deserved) #but also the CHAPTER SONGS. them being made for a given chatacter(s) with the help of Sam lakes poetry #the changes with ‘this road’ by Poe with every Alan chapter. becoming more distorted and revealing lyrics and the spiral #the scratch song being 1) hilarious and 2) similar to Zane’s poetry in the aw1 arg #the emotion in superhero when saga feels lost at the story making it so Logan was gone #the lines of her feeling like a ghost in this story forming around her.. how she feels guilty and absent for both what the story’s doing #and being away from Logan because of her job. ashdhhhhjhh my heart #AND. follow you into the dark HAS to be alice. which kills me because at for at I thought of Alan #but no. Alice jumped in the dark place after him. it’s so !!!!!!!!!!! #the rabbit hole line. Alice spiraling deeper and deeper into a dream—into wonderland #the Lost at Sea one is also good. intrigues me. the Bowie and Lynch references are blatantly aw2 Zane #but it’s so similar to diver Zane and the ‘originals’ death. being lost in the dark place with illusions of escape #and losing any sense of identity. whether he’s real at all or the monster of this sea or just a lost soul. #the soft and calm vocals / instrumental really makes the whole thing #NEED to stop typing more tags because this is a Lot. however. #‘no one left to love’ is also a phenomenal song and one of my favorites from the album. GORGEOUS vocals and how it all flows together. #such a powerful and beautiful way to end a chapter #anyway that’s all I had to say :) #god. I’ve started to watch a few playthroughs of the game and 90% of people have skipped the chapter songs and every time im #that’s fair but my brain and soul might implode if I don’t see anyone else talking about how good these songs are

[bellerintwo]

"we have 4 finals left to play guys focus" "real arsenal fans aren't celebrating until the season is over" for the love of everything that is beautiful in the world, shut up

#if I see this take again I'm genuinely going to start crying lmao ahhhhh #and if you get to the end of the season and you never celebrated anything then what?? they're not bringing a trophy out for you mate #did anything matter last season? if the only way you measure success is with a trophy then no maybe not #but when I put on last season's kits I don't remember the games we lost I don't even remember losing the league #I remember Martin officially being named captain and both nld games and the last minute winners and farewell Granit #even beyond last season of all the games I've seen in my life I remember maybe 6-7 losses #more than that I remember how fast hector was and when nelli debuted and mikel off the bench in his last game #I remember arshavin's 4 goals and that mf who broke aaron ramsey's leg and how watching cesc made me fall in love with football #how on the weekends it was arsene wenger who raised me #no one lets our players live and now you're not going to let your fellow fans live .... literally what are you doing here #it’s not your job to be calm it’s your job to support the club! you’re supposed to bring the passion wdym no celebrating until the end ???

[blujayonthewing]

thinkin about the time my mom said 'how SHARP is that KNIFE???' from the other room when I was slicing tomatoes and thinking about how using knives at her house ranges from 'annoying' to 'actively nerve-wrecking' because they're so fucking dull and also thinking about how many times she's fucking lacerated her own hand while cooking

#my response to my mom being aghast at my audibly sharp knife was a jovial 'a sharp knife is safer than a dull one!' #which I THOUGHT was just me pointing out a truism that she would have heard before but she was like [skeptical] really?? #..... YES. OH MY GOD. SO MUCH MAKES SENSE. YOUR KNIVES ARE LIKE THAT ON PURPOSE??? #I thought you were just bad at knives.... but you're WILLFULLY bad at knives.......... #YES!! if you have to fight it to do its fucking job it's gonna be harder to control and have more force behind it when you LOSE control MOM #I'm positive I've talked about this before I just think about it all the time agdjfkssgsk #plus I only recently made the '... wait she's also cut herself a LOT' connection lmao :'D mom... please.... #accidents happen to everybody no matter how careful you are BUT for what it's worth I have still not yet sliced the shit out of my thumb #like my mother has MULTIPLE TIMES #so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #about me

[knaveofmogadore]

You ever have a customer with a legitimate problem but they're such an asshole that they extinguish the embers of empathy within you with their insolence?

#messages from knave #her name is [redacted] and I've dropped from being her champion to wishing she'd lose internet #in about 4 hours #i felt. SO BAD. for this woman last night. only for her to call and scream at me #when the office phone turned on this morning #she's like 'the weather shouldn't have effected anything' when it was raining half this week #this same woman blew her top that people were late when a fucking tree was blocking the road #i tried so hard to keep feeling bad for her cause we (my boss) genuinely screwed up at her house #but she's made it extremely difficult to keep being nice to her because she's begun inventing problems #like for example #i say 'the electrician is gonna be there between 9 and 10am' #she says 'youre disorganized and confused because he said he cant be here at 9. why are you terrible at your job' #i send her a SCREENSHOT where the electrician says he's going to be there around 9:30 #she says 'thats not 9am' motherfucker that isnt what i said. He gave a timeframe of 930ish to 10am and that is what i told you. #between 9 and 10 #lord in heaven #i dont know why she hired us again she hates one of our techs enough to remember him by name and ask he not be sent #she's never said a nice word and threatens to sue us constantly like WHY DO YOU WANT US TO WORK FOR YOU IF YOU HATE US #YOU'RE PAYING. GO ELSEWHERE #and i tell her last night 'just so you know we're not done #'we have to come back #and what does she do but fucking call me at 8am yelling about why shit isn't done. ma'am. i told u it wasn't finished #im going to lose my mind #can't even make her my boss's problem because he threw a temper tantrum at the implication something was his fault #and fumbled their text chain so gloriously last night that he wont even share what he said to make her want to sue him specifically #I don't even WANT to know what he said because it'd give me an ulcer thinking about it #i need another job before this one gets sued into the ground #also im sick because my partner works retail and thats about as bad as having a kid in daycare

[13eyond13]

Sometimes I still think about how sweet it was when that anon checked on me last year when I was posting overly dark jokes. Thank you whoever you were, that was kind

#i am so much better now but last year was a bad one for me #there was a time in the fall where i literally couldn't get out of bed just because it felt pointless #anyway my mom also forced me to make a doctors appointment and luckily my doctor is super kind and got me on a good medication #but it also was just from stuff like losing my job struggling in school and going through the hurricane etc #im just so glad that i was pushed through that by concerned folks because im enjoying life much better now and that wasnt that long ago #anyway if you're struggling badly right now pls know its not hopeless #reach out for the help youre given and try to see yourself as worth it to fight for #take it little steps at a time #celebrate the small victories like having a shower or taking a walk or answering a call #the best thing for me other than the doctor was just finding ways to be around other people more #instead of feeling defeated i had to think of ways i could fix the loneliness that was affecting me so much #i had to get proactive like i started volunteering and started a book club etc #also i just made myself be very honest with the friends i already had about my struggles and it helps with feeling closer to them #and less alone in it all #because its not that uncommon to have those kinds of struggles and it helps other people open up about their own or just know how you are #the hardest things to do were the most rewarding things in the end #volunteering gave me a reason to get out of the house meeting new people and trying new things and feeling good about myself and #i had to remind myself that i was able to offer things of value and that other people like having me around actually #like the book club is something my friend group looks forward to so much and made new friends through and i started that! #even though i was nervous about it and didnt know if theyd like it at all #other people need you just as much as you need them and thats the truth bby #p

[hella1975]

the boys' first commentary on keating's lessons being cameron and neil saying 'that was weird' / 'but different' is getting to me like the entire film is a narrative on the suffocation of heavy academia and how it prioritises certain subjects (medicine, law, business, engineering) while condemning creativity and passion and how institutions are promoting conformity and grades-over-wellbeing teaching methods more and more as you both move up the elitism scale and as time goes on, and how that was okay for these kids and like so many generations before them they were going to let it happen to them, but one teacher was different. one single teacher told them to seize the day and make their lives extraordinary and he made them look directly at the state of things, and for a little while it was beautiful but they're just kids; how could they ever change things? and sure enough it catches up to them and the institution wins because it always does and suddenly the suffocating thought of what neil is so sure his life is going to be is so daunting and terrifying that he cant even face it

#he's just like me fr just without the gun #like yeah the world is actually a harrowing monotonous place and my generation is the last one to play outside as children #and if you dont chase a certain career path or excel in certain subjects then you're deemed inherently lesser #and your success is measured by your bank account and there is no warmth #like damn this film realeased in the 80s and set in the 50s had no business capturing the terror of being young in our society so perfectly #the ONLY saving grace is the 'o captain my captain' scene at the end #it's proof that the beautiful passion-filled independent lives the boys dreamed about #dont just become food for worms and we dont just go right back to the beginning #there's hope at least even if half the time im too busy BAWLING MY FUCKING EYES OUT to even see the screen at that point #godddd girl watching this doing an 'academic subject' that you despise and on bad days think might be the thing to beat you #but you do it anyway bc you're stuck now and besides your parents kinda made you do it when all you ever wanted to do was write #but that cant happen bc writing isnt 'good' the way economics is 'good' and maybe #maybe all that'll happen is i'll lose and start a career in business and work an office job for two decades #in a world that's melting and owned by corporations that want to bleed me dry #maybe that's all there is #i need a fucking cigarette #dps

[iero]

Gotta admit that this is the most disappointing Pittsburgh visit I've had so far and that I am ready to go back home tomorrow, but at least work didn't call or text me for anything the entire time.

#personal #Also partially my fault for my anxiety straight up getting in the way of me having fun. I'm an anxious fucking mess. #My job knows they fucked me over bad last year when they made me WORK on one of the days I was here. They know not to do that again. #Also my mom and her boyfriend are here! So many P*nguins jerseys (derogatory)... #So you win some you lose some... I'm sure I'll be back in the fall.

[endworldbroadcast]

With the amnesia and all it is so distressing having a past of competence because it's pointless that at some point I was 'smart' enough to finish my graduate studies and even work a prestigious career at a relatively influential position because I can't do that anymore and even it was 'me' I barely remember and do not connect to myself at all from Before that it feels dishonest and aggrandising to identify myself as that person.

#d #I can surmise my entire personality changed significantly because others have observed as much #But I don't really remember 'being' me from before #I relearned facts about my past from anecdotes and other records/evidence #But it doesn't ever feel like ME #It's so... alienating #From others and yourself #Amnesia is such a Lifetime movie experience that I get embarrassed over it like it's so fake #Like that isn't supposed to happen to YOU because that only happens in SHITTY PSYCHOLOGICAL DRAMAS! #I feel like I'm faking even though I would have no reason to because all of that made me lose the decent life I had #My research my job my skills my family all just gone poof #): #I'm fine though lol I have the Buddha nature #Sorry for braindamageposting hee hee who gives a FUCK

[aro-as-in-straight-as-a]

…

don’t mind me im just mad as hell ill be fine in like 10 min :))))))

#if one more MOTHERFUCKER at work wants to tell me how to do MY goddamn job I’m gonna lose it #No I in fact cannot do what you’re asking me to do bc it’s gonna clog up my workstation for 45 minutes during the busiest part of my day #I get paid less than you and work in worse conditions than you doing harder shit. Fuck Off. #‘Hur dur you not doing this thing fast enough is really inconvenient’ do you know what’s also inconvenient? #The fact that none of yall bitches can do the simple task of matching SHAPES AND COLORS #and then blame ME for the fact that you fucking up a kindergarten level task made shit break #and I couldn’t babysit you because I was busy doing the FOURTY FIVE MINUTE LONG TASK that YOU asked me to do #and you don’t even have the decency to come and pick it up when it’s done #all while I’m babysitting a newbie #and me expressing any frustration gets me treated like I’m fucking hysterical and need to be sedated #I don’t hate my job generally but on days like this………..my patience is tested 🔪

[fragmentedblade]

Not to be a jingfu on main, but it's so cute that Jing Yuan thought of Fu Xuan with those jelly beans

#me: the Xianzhou characters are all just coworkers #also me whenever anyone is shown to be fond and have intimate knowledge of some other character: awwww #Like Fu Xuan and Jing Yuan playing starchess and teasing each other or making a reference to things they like #or Jing Yuan talking about young Yukong #Quingque apparently disliking Fu Xuan but obviously that not being the case‚ knowing what she likes and how she thinks #Fu Xuan hiding that she has a sweet tooth but Jing Yuan and Quingque knowing it and teasing her for it #I don't know. There are a lot of instances of these small intimate details in the middle of what looks like a coworker relationship #Good coworkers‚ but coworkers nonetheless #And ironically it moves me so much? Even more so than Belobog. I've been told several times that Belobog seemed more tight. And I agree #In Belobog people were friends or family or companions but linked by something closer than mere coworkers with Wildfire #Even Sampo in the Underworld was strangely 'theirs'. He had the magenta colour of Wildfire and he was trusted to some extent #The Luofu characters don't have that. And yet the fragments of intimacy scattered through their interactions move me a lot #These are people who have known each other for centuries. Jing Yuan knows of Yukong's youth‚ its joy and grief #He knows Fu Xuan has a sweet tooth and teases her about her height. Quingque does too #Fu Xuan chastises both of them for being lazy but she knows they're smart and good at their job. She plays starchess with Jing Yuan #Quingque mocks Fu Xuan for being a workaholic but is very aware of the weight she carries both in her position and ideas about destiny #I won't mention Yanqing and Bailu because there is obviously more than a coworker bound when it comes to them #But yes I love the moments of intimate knowledge scattered through the Xianzhou‚ so telling of the fact that these people have known #each other for longer than several human lifetimes‚ and that perhaps they don't necessarily regard each other as more than their coworker #But perhaps that's enough in order for them to care. Perhaps in a lifetime over one thousand years the intimacy gained with a coworker #through several centuries is something beyond what we could understand in our decades lifespan #But also‚ perhaps‚ I don't know. Also‚ perhaps‚ the do care beyond coworkers in that strange line between work and friendship #Perhaps it's strange for Xianzhou natives to tell apart that kind of relationship after so much intimacy and knowledge through the years #And perhaps‚ once again‚ as it often happens for them‚ they think they'll always have enough time to tell; until they run out of it #They play chess together. Quingque can lose time because Fu Xuan can't stay mad if she brings her sweets. Are they just coworkers? #We play chess. I know what tea and sweets you like best. I brought them today since you would indulge me and play starchess with me #Thanks for playing with me‚ I'm running out of book puzzles. You keep divining my moves but I'll invent a fake story to distract you #Are we coworkers or something more like friends? Where is the line after so many years? #I talk too much but I love this charged nothingness haha I find it ironically so true to how many relationships in real life develop #And I find it so moving‚ that representation of this endearing smallness of everyday life. Of these small things is life made

[bundlebrent]

Greeeaaaat they were like oh we don’t have anyone who can look at your eyes today go call scheduling and get a new MRI appointment

#like I hadn’t told them my job when I made the appointment #I went to the parking lot and called scheduling and they were like well normally there’s a fee for rescheduling this late #and I was like I’m here I’m ready THEY sent me away #and the scheduling lady was like what?? #she also thought it was bullshit no one could look at my eyes #I mean I don’t want to lose my vision or whatever so I’d rather come back later since they didn’t but wtf man #medical stuff #I dunno if you guys need it tagged something lmk

[tvrningout-a]

i don’t wanna go to work tomorrow oooof

#i haven’t been home long but i gotta get ready for bed bc i gotta be at work at 8 am and i mean!! #today wasn’t bad!! it was just very long and i heard today that my district manager expects us to work through #our shifts without going on break :) during holiday :) some of us work 8-9 hours lads :) #and even if we didn’t!! that’s still a lot to ask when customer service and hand making products isn’t all sunshine and fun time #i left my previous job bc i wasn’t eating and working straight through 8+ hours and it really showed in how i was mentally #you really need that time to eat and relax when you’ve been running around all day and dealing with people who aren’t always pleasant #let me stop venting though asdfg #i just feel very strongly about how companies treat their people and this is a big one bc of how miserable my last job made me #you stop taking care of your employees and you’re gonna lose them #get ready to ramble | ooc #tw vent

[villalunae]

*choking myself out* I WILL NOT BE TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF AGAIN

#personal #ANYWAY #me having to deal with the emotional stress of Not Letting Myself Let People Walk All Over Me and Advocate For Myself #like ughhhhhhhhhh. hate it. gonna have to have the You Need To Show Me How To Do My Job Or Im Quitting Before Youre Angry #That I Cant type convo which like whatever im good with that but i DO gotta lose my mind over it before and after cuz im Like That #@myself u always do this u always feel sooo upset for taking up space and being a burden that u unilaterally #let ppl force you into being one like Girl Lets Cut This Off #extending the shoujo hand to myself like lets make them mad now instead of being upset that they forced you into being smth that made them #mad <3 xoxo kill them also just like let it go find a nice lil weirdo job somewhere and Be Normal and 22 and Lame #theres heavy trauma thats caused all that but for the moment id Rather i be upset and cry abt it now then stress myself out for four weeks #until my brain busts open and i have a panic attack