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#(bc i didnt know how to long rest well) im getting a much more fleshed out picture of his manipulation and its so great
4giorno · 5 months
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okay im enjoying getting these dialogues i previously missed so much. literally astarion when you ask what? will you miss me: "HA!
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why not!!!"
#yea dont look at me i started a new character and felt like shit going through all the stuff that i just walked past on my beloved character#so i just made my og character the exact same again and im doing the exact same route with him again VDKFJDJDJDKF#but now im gonna actually do all the stuff in the game bc before i didnt understand the game so i missed so much#i was gonna explain everything i felt but it got way too long so ill just say this instead:#im already getting so much fuller of an experience and i couldnt be happier#and i wanna play my new character (who i like) when i dont feel misersble doing it#im not someone whos precious abt their games like when its over thats it thats the canon story so this way works for me#i build it meticulously until im satisfied!#im still gonna make the same decisions. hes still gonna be the same deceitful little rat with delusions of grandeur#but now i just play out all the massive amounts of stuff i didnt know existed bc i didnt understand how to navigate the game#its gonna be tough to eat the tadpoles again and be cool to the dream visitor bc i HATE the emperor hdjdjdjf#but like i said first time around its absolutely what he would do bc hes convinced he can control it#to get back to the post itself LMAO im obv so happy to get all the astari0n dialogue i missed bc just with this one dialogue i missed#(bc i didnt know how to long rest well) im getting a much more fleshed out picture of his manipulation and its so great#im on tactician now so im hoping it will force me to long rest more so i miss less camp dialogue#anyway can you believe my previous attempt at these tags was even longer? lmao bye im off to enjoy the game however i please!
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volfoss · 6 months
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⚱️<- for volfoss character ask 👍
YIPPEE ok i KNOW the girl u will like so so much <3
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tossing veycer there for scale and also because hes important to their fucked up sibling dynamic. but i think sheala would make u go insane analyzing.
sheala has a LOT of depth and theres a lot of politics involved (one day i think i will have to make a heres volfoss' politics in a silly slideshow or something bc there is so much.) so i will do my best to explain why i think you would like her :)
first off. she is very good at hiding her tragedy and well um. theres not a better example of this than on the ikuaipe route (shes part of the ikuaipe army, which is like one of the 3 major countries in volfoss). to simplify it as much as i can, there is a war going on bc asdenia (one of the other big 3 countries) refuses to export rare metals to ikuaipe, who use them to make drugs. there is no reason explained for WHY they stopped this but thats all u really need to know about the war bc its complicated and they get into a lot of stuff w the drugs (specifically on like. how withdrawal is handled and how restricting supply from people isn't immediately going to fix their issues etc, its handled very well) in detail in game but. sheala's older brother is veycer who is the head of the army (he fucking sucks. i hope he dies soooo bad but he is also written with depth and like. kind of even tho he DOES some over the top evil stuff [like well. the incident im about to get into lol], he still is given enough character that he's fleshed out properly. all of the "villains" are but thats besides the point.) plays a very big part in well. why sheala would make you go make so many character studies on her.
anyways dear god. politics explained and hatred for veycer being put in there in advance. sheala goes on a mission (where shes a commander, so has a decent amount of responsibility there, and more specifically is leading the rear of the troops, veycer is leading the front) and gets ambushed pretty bad. to the point that when shalvas (who you would also love. but it would take me like 3x as long to get into his diseases. i promise youd love him tho, hes the silly protagonist) arrives, theres just one soldier left of her unit bc the rest of them were killed, and that soldier dies shortly after. sheala is facing one of the four heroes (who basically are some of the strongest characters in the world, and are sworn to remain neutral (they are not by the point of the war, so one of them is fighting on the side of asdenia. its a lot of politics im so sorry) and a BIG amount of very tough enemies on her own when shalvas arrives. shes dealing with a ton of guilt about the entire team she was leading dying (which honestly like. she couldnt do much about bc of how strong the guy thats part of the 4 heroes is) and is completely determined to stay, even if it costs her her life. she's someone thats very loyal and very stubborn and this is not so great for her. thankfully, shalvas is able to persuade her by basically saying hey. if you died it would cause more trouble for veycer than if you lived. thats the ONLY way she would go back despite being in pretty bad shape and being completely willing to let her life go there.
on the way back, shalvas clearly is having the very awkward moment of ok. she is clearly upset and i do not know how to make it better (he is like. very very blatantly written as autism to me, so he communicates in a way thats very awkward a lot of the time, or just is silent. which is honestly very cool of him), so after Sheala apologizes for everything to him, he tells her that she can always fight the hero again (because yk. she didnt die lol) and then IMMEDIATELY denies it when she asks if hes comforting him. their dynamic is really nice because its just like two weird as fuck guys trying to be friends.
which um. well you see. veycer sucks so bad. and he is incredibly mad at how badly sheala fucked up with letting her troop get killed (guy that loves to get so mad soooo much of the time for no good reason other than its fun for him). and hes having a little moment of its fun to do drastic punishment and despite another army officer (who youll def see a lot if you play, his name is auveon. hes friends w sheala) begging him to not do it, he orders sheala's execution. (and when i tell you i felt like i was going to puke reading this for the first time, i do mean it. this is the 2nd route ive done, so id already seen a lot of her and liked her a lot, and ofc the more ive interacted w her in this (and the last route) ive cared a lot more about her. so it was like oh ok. we are suffering). veycer basically is just like well um. she fucked up BAD and she cant get any leniency for that. yeah even if she IS my sister, people would see me as a weak commander if i gave her a lesser punishment so um lol. all of the soldiers are pleading with him to not do it and auveon asks if sheala wants to plead her case and um. well she says "I will follow Your Excellency’s orders. I am prepared to give up this life at any time if I am told to die." like. what is your DEAL.
she is fine eventually tho, just got demoted and veycer had the fucking nerve to be like omg i loveee my family thank you shalvas for protecting her. which is then like ok. did she know he wasnt really going to do it. or is he just lying to shalvas for fun. its insane to me they have such a fucking weird dynamic bc sheala worries about veycer a lot and then veycer is like um. ok i kill you with rocks and hammers. but i promise i love you.
ANYWAYS. some of the other things i really like about sheala. she has a quick temper and will NOT hesitate to call someone out on BS (this gets her in trouble a lot but shes very capable. when i fought her in the first route it was the worst fight of the game bc she is THAT strong) but she is also very kind as a person. she and turi-marrya (shes a water maiden but is also genuinely so fucking cool and i could go insane over her. easily.) in both routes ive played, despite being on opposing sides are very kind to each other and very polite (both of them having a lot of respect for the other, given some events in the game.) i think just like the way that she is facing a lot of tragedy (mainly due to VEYCER.) and yet is still brave enough to keep going but also does have a lot of moments where the grief does hit her and she is clearly struggling to deal with it. i think youd love her.
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driflew · 2 years
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beholden outlines and notes
i got a review on beholden yesterday who pointed out its been, yknow, well over a year since i updated the fic. obviously those of you following me here know ive been writing other stuff, and so it shouldn't come as a surprise that im not rlly planning to go back to working on it
why? other than getting into another fandom, i honestly just wasnt really happy w how the fic was turning out. i loved s1, but s2 i just wasnt liking as much. and as much as i was excited for how s2 (and the fic in general) would have ended, i just couldnt get myself to keep working and Get there. besides that, i started beholden on quarantine, and when class/work started up, i simply didnt have the time to write so much. beholden was already 70k. to finish would have probs doubled the length, and that's not time i could dedicate
as such, ive decided to post my outlines/notes for what the rest of beholden Would have been if id ever gotten to finishing it. this is, i guess, my final sendoff for beholden. here's every doc / outline i had guiding my writing of this fic
ill say in advance this fic was a mix of plotting and pantsing, so not everything in the outline is completely fleshed out. but the main beats are there, esp in scenes i was more confident about
...these also weren't meant to be viewed by anyone but me, so they might be sort of confusing/under-explained. il add a bit of commentary/context when i can
first, here's my detail on how the rest of season two would have gone:
NOV 3: Jordan Kennedy statement
toll his Knowing and rereading old statements
talk about Peter! self-isolation as a way to 
1. Ready himself and his friends for his death, by not being too deeply attached, 
2. Keep peter and elias’s attention on him rather than his assistants, 
3. Get peter to agree to yeet any threats into the Lonely, to keep his marks low
Dust to Dust. michael shelley is there. implies jon might have known abt the tapes all along and they could very well be the secret?? 
does this implicate michael in gertrude’s murder
Tim and Martin have an argument at flat while the three of them are listening to tapes. 
Jon has been guiding, but Tim worries he may be guiding Away from the truth (paranoid)
Martin worries Tim is so focused on finding Jon’s secret he’s getting distant from Jon. 
They’ve been listening to tapes at Martin and Tim’s whenever possible. 
martin’s tired of it! hes doing work at home basically, and tim’s kind of erratic now that hes got the idea in his head jon might be a monster. it worries martin too but he knows that even w the shit jon pulls he IS their friend
sasha’s gonna have. Thoughts abt the Michael thing as well, given Michael and Jon clearly have some kind of shared past / understanding
something something… Michael talks about a shared past, Jon about reverting the Change… they both worked with Gertrude…… Gertrude and Jon reverting “the Change”??
but what the fuck is the Change? what “changed”??? why did they need to undo it? why do only they remember it? do they need to prevent it from “changing” again?
could she talk to Michael?
WHERE DID THIS PLOT COME FROM 
Group intervention, 
Martin trying to make them stop being so suspicious of each other. Gearing up for the “if we were all happy would that be so bad” bit
DEC 1: Daisy drops by in place of Basira to give a statement / talk to tim. Jon half avoids this one bc 1, not feeding on a friend, 2, daisy will Kill him if hes noticeably not human (esp since she figured it out thru him changing in her dreams last time)
asks Tim about the nathaniel thorp statement. she wants to see it. 
looked back into the guy. he wasn’t named nathaniel thorp, but its been a long time. she’s not about to rule out a fake name
JAN 7: Tessa Winters 
WHAT HAPPENED IN CANON:
tim and jon argue
martin tells jon to fix shit w tim
not them encounter in the tunnels
talk to elias
JAN 25: Caroline Gorka
Jon takes this one. hungry
jons on his isolation arc
FEB 11: Maxwell Rainer raid
Feb13: Melanie statement 2
Tim bumps into in the library while researching and asks her abt what she’s been researching. she talks abt the notThem, and the table, and the statements Jon has given her copies of. Tim frowns and tell her that they know where the table is, it’s here, why would Jon lie about that… unless…? they decide fuck the library and fuck work and just leave
they do some research into jon’s past. Tim, Melanie, and Georgie go thru Georgie’s old pictures, but she doesnt have any (messy breakup… she got rid of most of it). talk abt the sudden personality change, etc. 
Tim decides that he must have changed. they talk abt how there’s usually someone who can see the difference, and Tim decides that since it isn’t any of them, it must be someone else in the institute. he asks around about what people think Jonathan Sims looks like, and “rosie” pauses before describing a complete stranger. tall, close-cropped hair, broad shoulders. and then this strange short man came in and she assumed they must have fired Sims, since he really wasn’t qualified, and hired some other Jon…
and that’s it. that must be. jon’s dead and this thing replaced him. 
Feb 16: axe to table
Tim calls Daisy, since she has experience killing these things. Melanie and Georgie decide to help—Melanie bc she was researching them, and Georgie bc that was her friend. Basira tags along too. Tim tells Martin and Sasha that they should come w him (without explaining), and to not tell Jon. rosie is more than happy to let them thru to artifact storage.
they all go, Tim explains that Jon is NOT Jon, and he’s going to prove it. then he turns around and puts an axe through the table
Jon shows up and is like. rosie wouldn’t let me in please tell me you didnt break the table. and Tim is like its too late, you bastard Jon-killer! 
chaos. 
dunno how this bit goes BUT 
shouting match in which they both talk abt rosie, and Martin realizes that rosie has been replaced
daisy attacks Jon and he panics, sending her to the Lonely as per the deal w Lukas. thats a problem! but also this fic equivalent of the buried
notRosie attacks, and the rest of them escape. idk how. Jon gets them to the tunnels probably? barricades them in the archvies? they deal w notRosie somehow. 
Jon has to come clean! its time t explain everything!
this might be a separate chapter. end on a cliffhanger and then in the new chapter Jon must explain….
new exposition dump chapter! here’s everything Jon has to explain (or not explain)
he is a time traveller, sort of, having sent his own memories back in time
he knew all of them (and daisy). all of them died. the world ended. he’s here to prevent it
probably toes the line between “it was my fault” and “im on your side.” yes he caused their deaths. no he doesnt want to cause them again. everything he’s done has been to stop those deaths from happening again.
explains he had to hide it because of Elias. probably explains how serious he is about this by explaining how he blinded himself to keep things from Elias and the Eye
…which leads him to explain shit like the Eye, the entities, the rituals, etc. 
which is a great lead-in to the Unknowing!
stresses repeatedly that he’s being honest, he’s telling them a lot and he’s willing to admit everything, but keeps two things to himself: he and Martin dated, and he’s going to kill himself in the Unknowing
...and that would have been s2! i was really excited for the not-Jon thing, but never got to it.
anyway. i also had these two notes at the end of the doc as things to consider in my writing of jon's interactions with Sasha and Tim
“sasha is jon’s favorite, theyre probably comfortable with each other”
“jon’s got stronger memories / more memories of tim hating him than tim being his friend, thats gotta be weird for how he feels about tim”
speaking of Tim, i ALSO have a doc specifically for guiding tim's arc. sasha's arc was mostly me rolling with the punches and working with what i thought she might be able to figure out, but Tim i had the beats planned more directly
TIM PLOT OUTLINE
peter lukas props Isn't human, jon Is helping him
jon is doing other shady shit, helping michael (also not human)
jon is very pointedly guiding them towards the unknowing but not saying what he knows or why
research avatars and learn ppl can lose their humanity / become monsters.
combine melanie's info on ppl replaced, like the notThem
horrible conclusion: on either was human and isn't anymore, or really isn't jon. were they ever even friends with jon?
(worth noting: if Jon truly was replaced when his personality changed, then all their moments of being genuinely close came after that. the person he is close friends with is not Jon. its the thing that killed Jon. the realization he “never actually got to befriend Jon at all” is going to do weird things to his heart, im sure)
(remember the table? tim can compare notes having seen it w melanie, who has been looking into the notThem) (statement info plus it now being revealed
jon is hiding shit from melanie as well) maybe have georgie in here looking for polaroid images or tape recordings of jon from college, which she can't find. no way to confirm he is who he's supposed to be
basira and daisy.…... basira can tell tim and sasha she's sectioned and that daisy believes Jon isn't human
AS FOR THE REST OF THE FIC...
when i started writing beholden, i plotted out the entire fic. i did s1 in detail, and s2 and three in... not a lot of detail. when i started s2, i made a new doc and more detailed outline, which is what i showed above. as i never got to s3, the s3 outline is... not super in-depth. had i made it to s3, i would have fleshed it out more, but alas. anyway, here's what i had:
Everyone knows MOSTLY whats up. 
There needs to be trust building! rights for jonmartin?
Jon plans to kill Elias after the Unknowing. Hes barely human, his friends are okay, and if they destroy the institute after his death, there shouldnt be any danger. In getting htem to trust him he accidentally forgets this means theyll be attached to him and wont Want him to die
elias now has to go on the offensive to get jon marked. Entities jon needs to be marked by still: buried, dark, desolation, end, flesh, hunt, lonely, slaughter, stranger, vast
At some point in this season, they have to find out what Jon’s real plan is 
FEB 17: starts. Does anything need to go here? Jon isnt on the lam. I guess re-bonding. Since most of them thought he was guilty of murder. Less “heres the past i remember” and more direct talk on his actual plan (but vague on how he plans to do the actual killing). can explain that hes not any more human than elias is. Also that they cant just Kill Elias or else it will kill all of them, but jon has a plan (that he cant tell the others, bc elias can read minds! Thats def why he cant tell them the plan)
APRIL 24: jude perry. If Jon wont go to her, Elias probably needs to bring her to Jon… oof. I think Tim is gonna get hurt by the desolation. 
Im putting the confrontation w elias here. Elias probably Knows what Jon is planning (or at least that hes planning to kill Jon, but not how) and Jon demands to know why the others are hurt. Learns Elias doesn need jon alive or to be The Archivist, it can be anyone, and elias isnt afraid to get a second one if he has to
APRIL 28: mike crew
...probably Simon this time, since Elias i think could get him to visit the MI anyway
Also I want to vaporize simon fairchild
Which i guess means jon avatar moments, which i want/need anyway
Unknown date: jon gets kidnapped by the stranger. Helen kills Michael simply bc i like Helen more. i will find real justification for this by the time i get here, probably
Coming back from being kidnapped is rough for jon bc he hasnt Known in a while or relied on his powers too much but, uh, hes starving
Assistants helping jon manage his inhumanity, which is uh… a tense issue, im sure. But theyre more sympathetic bc they like him more and also he did give up his humanity for them. having several anchors will make it all easier to manage
JUNE 29: is in the USA, is kidnapped by Trevor and Julia. Probably gets a Hunt injury here, since hes clearly not human, 
I think the fact jon had to leave the country to do this alone for some reason right now while theyre preparing for the unknowing stuff raises questions. Why cant this wait until after elias is dead??
before the unknowing, Jon records a tape explaining that killing the archivist means everyone else will be freed from the institute, to be listened to after he kills himself in the unknowing. He lists elias’s weakness of being in the panopticon, mentions leitner in the tunnels may be able to lead them. its a goodbye tape, saying sorry for lying about this last thing, and this is sort of his penance for killing them and the world. he can die instead this time, satisfied with saving the rest of them and confident they can finish out the rest of saving the world now that hes helped them survive and given them the tools to take down Elias. fic equivalent of testament, i guess?
AUG 6: plant explosives at the wax museum. They dont actually have to detonate during the unknowing, since the ritual would fail anyway, so? They can probs just blow it up right before while the circus is in the building getting ready, without getting Strange
I think same crew as canon go. Since theyre not waiting for the actual event or anything and are going beforehand, these were the ppl who knew how to set up the bomb and all
Jon plans to tell them he’s on the other side of the building, watching for anything that might come out and escape to kill it. He’ll text tim when hes there and tell tim to detonate. (
Jon actually plans to go inside, sit down w a bomb, and tell tim to detonate w him inside. So he’ll die and they’ll be free to kill elias
(he still wants to give Tim the option to get revenge on the circus, and sort of Still feels like. yknow, if Tim detonated it on him once, it'll be fine to do it again)
(will be fun to have Tim and Jon talk afterwards abt how Tim feels about Jon planning to use Tim to kill himself)
Sasha listens to the tape Jon left, figures out its jon’s suicide note, and calls tim immediately to stop him from detonating. She doesnt listen to the whole thing, just like. enough to hear the tone of jon's voice and Realize. Tim and Basira go in to stop/help Jon
and thats season 3! as i said, not particularly fleshed out. it def needed a lot of work, and besides, i wanted to flesh it out more when i had written more of s1 and s2, since i think its easier to do once you know what's actually on your page. but. didnt happen, clearly.
...you might be looking at these bullets and thinking "wait, wasnt there a bullet point about sending daisy into the lonely at the end of s2? where did that plot go?" and the answer is: it didnt exist when i started plotting the fic, but it was added later. i hadn't yet fleshed it out fully, but it would have worked similarly to pulling daisy out of the buried. i hadn't yet decided when to pull her out or whether the person o do so would be Jon or Basira. Jon would have gone and had a similar moment as the coffin where they bonded over losing their humanity, while Basira it would have been similar to the s5 plot line in which Basira had to take a long hard look at the stuff she allowed daisy to pull (since, yknow, you need to See someone to find them in the Lonely). i hadn't got far enough to figure out the details, tho, but figuring out what to do with daisy was something i found... particularly tricky, considering her character
ANYWAY. in addition to all this, i had, uh, a whopping THREE bullet points for "season four," which was basically rolled into arc three
They need a new plan to kill elias and i have no fucking idea what that plan is
Nvm. gertrude was gonna blow up the institute so thats what jon will do. Hes strong enough to survive and everyone else will be able to w the institute gone
...burn employment contracts? So they dont all die?
...that was all.
another thing i had decided (but not written down) while working on s2, however, that i didnt want to do "season four" and that i wanted to end at the unknowing. my plan was that id figure out what to do when i got closer to the end and had more information on what had transpired in fic. i think my vague plan was essentially "once they find out Jon was going to sacrifice himself they make him Not and do some shit to take the Institute down in that moment, based in the idea of destroying the institute."
one thing i wanted to do what play around with the fact the eye canonically favors Jon over Elias/Jonag and the fact that the lives of the assistants are tied to Jon, and see about burning the institute to weaken jonah further. if Jon was more powerful/favored, perhaps he could supercede jonah's power and thus, when jonah died, the lives of the institute employees could be tied to Jon instead? or something? i wasnt sure, esp w Jon being less favorable/weaker in this fic than canon.
the ending bit i was excited for was the unknowing, and everything that came after was just sort of ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
.....well! that's everything, i think! not all the way polished, but these were the ideas i had for how beholden would have gone. i also had two scenes half-written for the next chapter, and a random scene of flashbacks written on how the original cast died (written before daisy died in canon). i might post that as well, like, later
if you've read this far, thanks for still being interested in beholden! i cant express enough how grateful i am for all the support i received on this fic, including the fact that im receiving comments on it even now. it was a lot of fun to work on, even if i dont plan on finishing it. i hope seeing my notes, however patchy, helps you get a bit of closure on how this fic would have gone!
and, finally, if you'll allow me to be a bit silly: i love you, Beholden. sorry for never getting around to wrapping you up, but im so proud of you and grateful to you for existing. youre the most writing ive ever done in a single piece, and im thrilled to have you to show for how much i can get done if i really put my mind to it
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anissapierce · 2 years
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Rewatched Fire island while sewing patches into the inside of the thighs of my work jeans and trying to distract myself from the fact that ill be alone in the house for a month with me and the dogs and i paid special attn to max
So here are some notes about the movie n max thoughts.
:readmore:
So they all met in Williamsburg, keegan and luke were the only ones who knew each other before. We Dont know wht jobs Max,Keegan and Luke have.
Max seems pretty ... Neo-liberal? Noah describes him as "sweet" and "supersmart" but "a little uptight"
The Atwood memoir he's reading is important to note but he's probably the most... Well academically book smart than the rest and i don't think from what we know about his character that he was reading it bc he agrees w her politics or worldview. He is actually the first person we see call into question the fact that noah is kowtowing to norms by maintaining the body he does . "why would you confirm to this community's toxic body standards?" noah as the narrator agrees with him and owns up to being a "class traitor".
"and this why straight people hate us" hints towards max himself buying into the structure of respectability politics but honestly im not reading too much into the line because its often something tht lgbt folks will throw around without actually meaning it.
"its actually a logistical nightmare if you want to fuck on this island,at least if you want to do it indoors,no privacy anywhere"
This plus generally everything else show that Max is a private person,giving a narrative reason why we nvr see him kiss,fawn or fuck anybody onscreen. That doesn't excuse that Max is a part of a long line of characters who are desexualized for being Fat,Black and/or Gay,in Max's case him being all three is pretty rare in film or tv but its not rare for characters that are like him to not get fleshed out narratively.
"have you heard of ticks? How bout their best friends? Lyme disease" is why he doesn't wanna fuck outdoors so we know hes prudent
"oh my god i think i saw a tick in my room"
He is technically the reason that Noah's phone ends up in the pool bc he does come running out of the house and bumping into him. But i do like the fact that Noah trying to convince everyone to look on the bright side means he doesnt seem angry or even resentful of Max?
"itll give you the chance to unplug from social media" Max trying to look on the bright side is pretty sweet considering the others responses are pretty blaming (Luke) or just kind of offering sad looks.
Says a lot that his response to "the island will always be there, " is: "except for the whole climate change thing". Like if something being said and it isnt true he is going to speak up abt it. ( I think there is an issue of the Fat friend in various media being the buttoned up bookish school marm type)
"im not sure this is what the gay liberation front imagined for us" another line of him judging others based on respectability politics
" I texted him but it went to green, maybe hes right although you're more likely to be murdered in your own home" Max being the one to text him when he was off his mind the night before on who-knows-what shows that he's probably the one whos usually rallying the troops n making sur everyone got home safe. (Esp considering the fact tht he usually doesnt partake in the drugs that the rest of the guys do)
Once again cant help dropping tidbits, trying to reassure the others and himself that howie probably wasnt murdered statistically speaking.
"Calm down Bernie Sanders i love the pantry small businesses are the lifeblood of this country " probably the most neo-lib weve heard him get but he doesn't object to luke n keegan stealing so like , he's prob more left leaning than his lines indicate
"we have to go direct sunlight...raw chicken..."
Good to know that someone is paying attention to food safety
"i didnt prepare for an extra person so ..." And hes annoyed about dex being invited over?
"not you two salivating over a basic white guy again "
Love Max as the voice of a pragmatic audience member
A random note but luke is shown in the bg of the getting ready scene gesturing to Noah to see how he should take the G..... And uhh he disregards noah gesturing differently. So that explains a lil that they planted the seed of Luke getting beyond fucked up
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sscoutregimentss · 3 years
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I was gonna make a request based on your Eren x Gamer Reader post but then I saw you take poly requests... Erejean x Gamer Reader? (She/her pronouns btw ^_^)
sure thing anon! your brain is huge. i started a one shot which is now sitting in my drafts bc i literally dont know how to finish it. maybe i'll post it later but for now here you go headcanons woohoo
eren and jeans dynamic makes it look like its impossible for them to share a girlfriend but it actually? works surprisingly well?
arguing is kinda their love language in a very strange weird way. if theyre not fighting somethings wrong but their like constant bickering actually is rlly important to you three's relationship lmfaooo a lot of communicating is just eren and jean fighting and then you pick up on something they say and you three talk it out. plus its gets all their energy out at the end of the day... like when puppies run around in circles bc they didnt go on long enough walks
jean is the planner of the couple, always making sure you guys get tickets to see this that and whatever, always figures out how ur gonna get places and when everyone will be picked up, makes sure everyones schedules are free and that theres no big game release that you'll miss and eren doesnt have work and jean isnt volunteering
in terms of nerdiness jean is a decent middle ground between you (who says "ummm actually..." unironically) and eren (who thought dungeons and dragons was a kinky thing) because he lives with connie so he gets roped into playing stuff like rainbow six seige and watching battlestar galactica into late hours of the night. also he's an only child who was prone to boredom as a kid so he played video games like any other only child. that being said he has a more extroverted personality and aptitude for sports so he just never got as absorbed in it as you did
this kind of makes eren jealous tbh because he thinks jean has more to relate with you then him. but jealousy is like a natural feeling and despite his feigned reluctance jean is happy to share his knowledge with him.
plus eren realizes that what he lacks in video game and movie knowledge he makes up in anime bc jean is clueless on that front. once you went on this huge rant about how sailor moon would decimate goku in a fight and jean just goes "gokus the pirate with the fox spirit, right? hes trying to become number one pro hero right?"
speaking of eren eren and jean are on the same volleyball team (i hc they play volleyball bc theyre tall but i think theyd be cute on any sports team because im weak hearted) and you become their fave cheerleader <3 they look for you in the stands before each game and have their own little ritual for good luck. when he spots you jean jumps really high (despite the team captain, levi screams at him to save it for when the game starts) and makes a heart with his arms and blows you a kiss when he gets in the air and its so embarrassing so eren just dogpiles the embarassment but giving you an over exaggerated wink its the worst theyre gross
jean gets you into connie's discord server after you complain that people are really rude to you in online games and eren is quick to demand an invite too even though he literally plays nothing and has no idea how discord works. he will log in and ping you to show you a meme and even though connie's server is really chill with rules (like 10 ppl max, just some friends hanging out) he has always wanted to say "no memes in general" so he does it every time. you have to show eren how to use private messages once connie jokes abt eren being his discord kitten.
cuddle pile while watching movies... jean is a film buff so you three have movie nights rlly often. its usually you sandwiched in between them with jean behind you and eren in front of you so you can play with his hair. jean's movie taste is actually really broad and you and eren both find a ton of new favorites through him.
they both really like listening to you ramble. you can explain soooo much lore abt your fave series and theyre both really invested. eren is more invested in the characters while jean is more focused on what happens next, but theyre both listening rlly well and making sure you know they care. they kinda care in different ways though? while eren is just passionate and because he's so passionate he must know about all things you like, jean is either interested or just likes hearing your voice. of the two jean is more likely to give you short answers and he'll be more dozed off so he's good to go to when you just want to rant. eren is going to ask you more questions and get wayyy more confused so he's good to go to when you want to explain or flesh out your points.
jean finds eren's jealousy of fictional characters sooooo ridiculous. whenever eren is pouting about some new video game guy youre in love with jean is rolling his eyes because of course its eren jaeger he's just looking for things to get angry at. "what are they gonna do idiot, come out of the tv?" but then one day there's a character that looks a lot like eren and suddenly he understands everything. but he realizes you have a thing for guys with long hair. he'll keep the mullet around for a while
they both really like having you sat in their laps and (unbeknownst to you) in order to avoid conflict they created a system. cozy game? eren. reading? jean. watching anime? eren. watching something live action? jean. playing a game on your phone? eren. watching an analysis video for your favorite franchise? jean. just messing around on your computer? rock paper scissors, best of three. eren likes to hug you tight and rest his head on your shoulder while talking to you. when it gets quiet he'll nuzzle his face in your neck and give you small kisses there. while jean likes to put his hands under your shirt and rest it on your stomach while you two chat. he's puts his head on your head or throws it back depending on your height and kinda just likes letting his hands wander, like rubbing up and down your arms or tickling you lightly.
you: i hate this stupid game
eren: yeah babe that game fucking sucks (has never played it in his life)
jean: then stop playing it?
you and eren, at the same time: what? no.
all in all they are good boyfriends 10/10 would recommend.
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akatsvmu · 3 years
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ok hot take — but also because I’m genuinely curious — I’ve seen a lot of discussion about the anti - Asian racism in shadow and bone and how it was unnecessary + obvious that the writers were white, etc.
*this ended up being long so I put the rest under the cut*
before I begin I just want to say that im just putting this out here to hear what others have to say !! I’m open to whatever u have to say legit I just want to talk to others about this hahah. I don’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable, but if I do then I apologize and if you feel like it, to let me know why exactly so I can be more aware next timee
okk so, reading what everyone else had to say after finishing the season made me question myself BIG TIMEEEE because tbh ..... I didn’t really see what the problem was as I was watching the show 😭
I didnt watch any trailers or promo vids before the show bc I didnt want to expect anything. so the first time I heard about Alina being half - shu was when she said it in the show — and TBHHH I was actually so happy (since I’m South East Asian) it was a pleasant surprise, I was like “omg I can relate to uu !! <33” kind of thing ya know.
After i watched it, I read the discussions on how they handled it and everything and I was worried bc I was still having such a hard time seeing what was so wrong about it,, I genuinely felt really bad at this point bc I was thinking like ... am I racist ?? Or am I actually contributing to racism and all that ?? soo I wanted to just share some of my thoughts here and if you actually finish reading this maybe like share some of your thoughts too ??
okok so hear we go — Alina being changed into half - shu didnt bother me at all, as I said earlier it was a nice surprise since it allowed me to relate to her more, i remember i even texted my friend bc i was so happy lmaooo (plus I thought it fit well since Jessie is actually half chinese).
About how the racism was ‘unnecessary’ since it’s a fictional world and all >> I get how they technically didn’t need to add it in — BUT... I kind of liked that they did add it ?? since it showed me that, oh you know she went through all of that, was discriminated against, etc. but was still able to do all the things she did and she didn’t let any of that stop her (I've finished the trilogy so I know how her story ends, assuming they stick to the books in later seasons lmao).
I mean tbh I even felt kinda better ? Hopeful even ?? My line of thinking was like “even the sun summoner faced some racism yet she was able to push through her journey !!” and all that ++ plus how she didn’t let it affect her — she even said, “don’t change my eyes” in that one scene which made me feel really proud for some reason.
about how they only centered the racism around Alina >> like how Jesper or Inej didn't really have to face any racism ++ and how it was all anti shu ..... again that didn’t rly bother me bc like ..... she’s kind of the main character ????? Not to say that the other characters stories don’t matter (lmao im not done w crooked kingdom yet but I already prefer their duology over the trilogy 😭🤚🏼) but given the fact that this particular adaptation of the story (or even season) is about Alina and Her experiences,, it’s kind of a given that the story will literally revolve around her and the challenges she faces ?????
the books obviously talked about what inej and the others went through + but that was because they had two books and individual chapters to flesh out their characters, plus we learned about their origins through a flashback type thing, it wasn’t a linear storyline.
This season had 8 episodes, so I really didn’t expect them to focus on their backstories since it's established that they’ve been working together for a while (the three crows, not Nina and Matthias). In the show, Alina has just discovered her powers = meaning her arc has just started.
lastly, about how it was unnecessary that Zoya was racist to Alina >> This one confused me a lot im ngl, because in the first book zoya does act like a lil bitch to Alina and everyone in the little palace — Marie and Nadia constantly talked shit abt her behind her back — bro even Genya didn’t like her lol — ALSO she even admitted to this in the second or third book right ?? So considering where her arc goes — I thought that this was obvious ?? she was meant to be disliked at first bc she literally has a redemption arc (AHHH don’t get me wrong here I loved zoya in the end pls shes so snarky ahidhshshs she a lil bitch but she owns it 😌😌 as she should)
I know she wasn���t outright racist to Alina in the books — but she was mean to her — *if I’m not wrong doesn’t she also whisper to Alina in front of the king about how she was an orphan peasant?* given the changes in the show, I thought it was understandable for her to treat her that way (not that it’s ok for anyone to be treated that way but you get the point right...) also idk if this counts but she does correct that one lady saying that Inej was suli and not whatever she originally said.
okk that’s all I can think of now, if you made it this far I wanna say thank uuu so much ily 🥰 ,, I know this was long I didnt think I had this much to say.
if you want then pleaseee share some of your thoughts 🤲🏼🤲🏼 i don’t want to subconsciously be a racist apologist or anything 😭😭 so I’m open to hearing what u have to say ++ also I’m really just wondering why I saw this so differently compared to everyone else ahshsjhdhs.
edit: ive only read the trilogy and six of crows so far. i havent had the time to start crooked kingdom or nikolai's books bc school :/ soo if youre gonna comment, please dont mention anything about crooked kingdom and anything after that !! huhu shhshshsa
SECOND EDIT: someone commented on this but i posted it accidentally and deleted the old one and didnt see their comment im gonna cry aaaaaa
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hongism · 3 years
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hi caly boo its ur 🌊 anon! i finally finished the most brilliant darkness and oh my lawd i’m in spain without the s. to put it shortly: U DID NOT DISAPPOINT BESTIE, and it seems unreal that u and ur mind and this fic even exists bc every moment is just polished to perfection, while simultaneously every character is polished to a sort of imperfect perfection(?). i have so many questions and things to say idek where to start, and tho im not good with words and even worse at deciphering hidden meanings, here are just some of my thoughts that i remember from the story.
hello my dear!!! eee im gonna answer separately since i think i’ll be very long-winded as usual but first of all thank you so much :(( this fic is actually very full of subliminal messages and hidden nuances that are weaved throughout which i think could be quite confusing so i apologize for that! if i had managed my time better, i would have adjusted when i started the fic to account for managing those aspects of the fic but alas i’m terrible at time management and i suck so. anyways.
first of all, ngl halfway into the story i lowkey forgot this was a wooyoung fic bc SANNN and also bc wooyoung appeared like 3 times lol. even after it finishing all that, i still had my doubts as to why this is a wooyoung fic, or more like why is san this significant in a wooyoung fic. im still a bit slow on these pls forgive me and im just curious why u made it like that.
i think yeah the most interesting thing about this fic is the emphasis on san over wooyoung. and when looking over it yeah i could have switched san and wooyoung’s characters and called it a day, but wooyoung really in my mind acts as the integral turning point for decisions made in the story. 
the goal with the fic wasn’t really to be hyperfocused on the pairing itself, but rather the emotions and thought processes of each character (aside from wooyoung). wooyoung was kept intentionally mysterious and a bit set apart from the rest of the fic because his role in story was moreso an abstract of hestia, the goddess of the hearth and home. wooyoung’s character appeared in times where y/n was struggling with the thought of home or adjusting to the new changes in her life! wooyoung’s pairing itself was actually intended to be solely platonic at first, but as the story went on i thought having mc develop feelings for him added another turning point in the fic!
moving on, the second biggest question i had is the whole hestia!wooyoung and cafe aurora situation. i did a bit of reading on hestia and only found out that she was the goddess of hearth, which might explain the fireplace and the kind of homey feeling to the cafe. and ‘cafe aurora not really existing to most’ part, which was already hinted at wooyoung randomly disappearing, mc never seeing the cafe before or wooyoung only bringing people he wants into it. i get that him inviting mc must suggest her significance to him, but why was he so adamant about his friends not mentioning him or the cafe to mc before that? wooyoung is quite a mysterious character i think, and given that this fic is supposed to be about him, it’s a bit odd that there’s still so many things left unknown, but its kinda cool that way nonetheless and im guessing u would also like to explain that further outside of the story too.
i think my biggest regret about this fic is the fucking summary.... i wrote that summary well before i even started writing the fic thinking it would go in that direction but it didn’t. and since this fic was for a collab, i left the summary as is because i genuinely cannot for the life of me figure out a better one. but i’m trying to figure out a better one. but i really fucking hate the current summary because it’s not at all what the fic is truly about and i hate it.
however, i don’t hate the fic itself, and the reason why i don’t is because i got to play with both my writing style and how i displayed the story. for this collab we were asked to pick a greek god and one of the seven deadly sins, and i selected hestia and sloth. and initially i had intended to have sloth be represented by the reader’s depression, and wooyoung be a more ‘real’ depiction of hestia. i shifted gears very early on in the fic but what it became is moreso abstract realizations in the characters.
san’s character is meant to be this idea of sloth, and it’s mentioned several times that he doesn’t want to move forward, he wants to go slow, he wants to stop moving so fast through life, and those things point to him being a depiction of sloth
wooyoung’s was harder to encapsulate in a more abstract way but you hit the nail on the head really with the homey feeling of the cafe. beyond that, mc talks about just naturally feeling at ease and comfortable with how things are with wooyoung and being around him, and he takes up this role of being the likeable, warm, cozy, comforting character. it all comes to a head in the last scene where he brings both y/n and san into the cafe.
and again wooyoung’s character is meant to be most mysterious and abstract, but if i had had more time to fully flesh out the fic, i think i would have liked to touch more on him. at the same time however i left it more open-ended and open to interpretation. the significance in him inviting mc in and not being mentioned by the others sooner is twofold. one; the others never really had any reason whatsoever to mention wooyoung. he was a friend outside the circle who never joined in with them when mc was around. i personally in my own friendships don’t mention friends outside the circle by name or anything, just kinda vaguely talking about them unless im certain the people know who this person is. the concept of wooyoung having to invite mc in was more nuanced and vague as well, intentionally so, but that was moreso meant to represent this idea of ‘you can’t make a home somewhere where you aren’t invited’ so y/n couldn’t fully make a home of the place she was in without being invited in and welcomed in, but again that’s something i wish i had more time to fully flesh out.
the hongjoong speech about love (and also the interaction with seonghwa after that) deserves a standing ovation of its own 👏 unfortunately, or not, im not actually going through the emotional turmoil regarding love the same way as hj or mc to be able to fully relate to his words, but the whole ‘if you dont love what u see in the mirror then u dont love it’ mentality really hit me hard, and i’d like to hang onto that when i make decisions in the future haha thank you wise caly! seonghwa and hongjoong’s story is also beautiful, and just like mc said, the more i look at it the more it hurts :’)
the hongjoong speech about love was meant to be something very jaded and specific to his worldview. it actually isn’t wholly how i view love personally, but it was a perfect description to how both he and y/n perceived the love in their own lives. mostly thanks to their own emotional turmoils. the mentality of the mirror quote is something that i think i also struggle with, which is why i included it. it’s hard to do, but even in friendships, i think it’s necessarily to stop and look at the person you were before this relationship and then the person during this relationship. if you don’t love the one you are now, then maybe it’s a sign to reflect and see the bigger picture, so that was a lil reminder to myself and i’m glad it touched you as well!!!
“do you love him, or do you love the idea of being in love with him?” - haha i see what u did there (or maybe i didnt please dont laugh at me if i didnt). its still so good everytime i see it bc i keep finding myself loving just the idea of things time and time again even when this makes total sense to me oof :/
heh yeah again with the more abstract concepts this one was more direct and ‘cliche’ but i fully wanted that cliche in the fic because i thought it suited the situation where mc was constantly struggling with a version of san that she thought she loved vs the version of san she got every time they were together
despite how enlightened she seems to be, mc still made the same choices, and i wanna smack her for it and pat her back at the same time. and maybe also bc of the fact that she feels so differently for the two men that i feel like no ending could really justify her decision, so ending in the vague is probably the best. your ending might kind of allude to someone more than the other already, and tho i still don’t think he’s the best one for her based on just my pov on love, i kinda agree with you. but again, this raises the question of, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic?
and yeah the whole knife in the chest at the end of it all is that she was still too scared to face the music so to speak. but really i would say she made the same choices up until the conversation on the balcony with san. and you’re absolutely right, the reason i chose the ending the way i did was because either way, there’s no justification. and actually although it might seems like i was alluding to someone specific, san being in the cafe at the very end was moreso to represent that as much as they fought, he still very much loved her and wanted to be loved by her. it was kinda an open casket ending there were no nails in the coffin, the choice between wooyoung and san still stands and an argument could be made for either of them! i think this is a fic that i could see myself revisiting one day with two endings - one for san, and one for wooyoung.
something i didn’t mention earlier about wooyoung’s character being left intentionally mysterious was that he was representing a new and budding love. the honeymoon phase where you’re falling for someone you don’t even really know. you are the reader aren’t meant to really know who wooyoung is because of that beyond what you read about him, so his past and such was left out intentionally to represent that idea of ‘hey wow im in love with a stranger!’ whereas san was this gritty love that’s bad for you. and there are pros and cons to each just as with anything!!
so,,,, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic? well i picked wooyoung for my collab so he was one of the main focuses of the fic regardless of which direction i took with it. as for why wooyoung wasn’t more forward, i already answered that but !!! i view it as both a wooyoung fic and a san fic. both are highlighted characters with main pairing roles!
i literally just woke up to write this and am going back to sleep ahaha so i apologize if this makes no sense. i somehow felt like i’ve read so much yet so little at the same time, maybe bc there are still so many things i havent fully made sense of, and that’s where i hope you come in and enlighten me. i still stand by my word that this fic deserves so much more recognition despite the lack of explicit smut bc of how much more you’ve explored through character building. love you caly and thank u for working so hard <3 — 🌊
no worries my beloved i hope you go back to sleep and get lots and lots of rest!! and i hope my response helps enlighten the not so clear things as well dgjdklfg but really thank you so much. it was a long fic and hard to get through at times, but as a whole, i’m proud of it and what i created, so thank you for recognizing my efforts and appreciating them 🥺
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does talking to an anon help about ninjago help? cuz I'm down
DHDKCKGSC YES IT DOES THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR OFFERING YOUR SERVICES
Okay now that I know I won’t be clogging people’s dashes buckle the fuck in my dude and I should stress that I literally would not be talking about this as much as I will be if I didn’t genuinely enjoy the show. I’m gonna go season by season and just Rant
S1 has the serpentine as the bbeg and like, as far as villains go they’re p lit. They’re early enough that they haven’t been done to hell, things are fresh, the characters and dynamics are being fleshed out, and all in all s1 is a pretty solid season. There’s some fuckery that gets brought up re: how the FUCK aging works and what the actual timeline of Ninjago is and how Wu and Garmadon fit into that timeline, fuckery that LITERALLY NEVER GETS RESOLVED IN A SATISFYING WAY BC ITS REVEALED IN A LATER SEASON (s8, dw we’ll get there lmao) THAT THE ONLY REASON THE FIRST SPINJITSU MASTER, WU, AND GARMADON LIVED AS LONG AS THEY DID IS CUZ THEYRE BASICALLY DEMIGODS AND ITS IMPLIED THAT LLOYD WILL ALSO LIVE FOR A LONG ASS TIME WHICH MEANS ONE DAY HES GONNA OUTLIVE ALL HIS FRIENDS AND EVERYONE HE EVER LOVED WHICH IS A FUN THING TO THINK ABOUT AT NIGHT But anyway I digress, s1 also coincidentally introduces Lloyd (he wasn’t in the pilot episodes that set up the rest of the series) and the existence of Evil Dad Garmadon.
S2 is where Garmadon starts acting a lot more Evil and a lot less Dad. He’s the main antagonist for that season, and I actually read somewhere that the show was originally slated to end after s2 which high key explains the fuckery of literally every single season after this lmaooooo. Much like s1, I really can’t find much to complain about, the first two seasons are pretty decent as far as I can remember
Season. Fucking. Three. Where the fuck do I start??? I hate season three for entirely personal reasons revolving around the STUPID GODDAMN ROMANCE WRITING. okay lemme back up and explain a thing first so, Jay is dating Nya and they’re fine, they’re going steady, aND THEN????? THE BEGINNING OF THE SEASON INTRODUCES BULLSHIT LOVE TRIANGLE FUCKERY FOR ZERO GODDAMN REASON, BITCH I HATE LOVE TRIANGLES AND I HATE THEM EVEN MORE WHEN THEYRE DONE FOR NO GODDAMN REASON!!! AND THEN. AS IF THAT WERENT ENOUGH. THEY SHOEHORNED A ROBOT ROMANCE BETWEEN ZANE AND PIXAL AND I KNOW I RANTED ABOUT THIS A LITTLE BIT WHEN I WAS ACTUALLY WATCHING BUT I DIDNT GO INTO ENOUGH DETAIL!!!! THEY MADE THE OTHER NINJA OOC IN ORDER TO PROP UP THEIR SHIP!!!!!! AND AT ONE POINT ZANE GOES “its like we were…made for each other” AND I HAD TO FUCUCJDHVE I HAD TO SCREAM INTO A PILLOW BRO, IM SO TIRED!!!! NO THE FUCK YOU WERENT!!!!!! YOU WERE MADE FOR YOU AND PIXAL WAS MADE FOR PIXAL AND IF YALLS WANNA BANG BOLTS THATS FINE BUT DONT IMPLY THAT EITHER OF YOU WERE MADE INCOMPLETE!!!! THATS AN INSULT TO YOUR MAKERS AND YOURSELVES, MOVE ON, PLEASE AND THANK YOU. anyway that season also killed Zane (for the first time, but not the last) (spoiler alert lmao) and like, not to be an emotional little shit but I did cry a bit at his funeral.
S4 is honestly one of my favorites, even though the romance crimes continue (the love triangle bullshit is continuing and honestly I maintain that Cole, Nya, and Jay should all have gotten together and in my personal canon they DID, and also Kai has a forced romance) the VILLAIN makes up for it imo. He’s campy!! He’s funny!! He’s a clown!! He’s serious enough that if he says “I’m gonna kill you” HE MEANS IT and that’s so fucking refreshing!!!! S4 is honestly 8/10 just for the villain alone, don’t like that it retconned the SHIT out of the elemental masters and how many different elements there are TO master but eh, it’s ninjago, shit is stupid.
S5 was…interesting? OH WAIT I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT S3 INTRODUCED A GARMADON WHO WAS A LOT LESS EVIL AND A LOT MORE DAD, HONESTLY I THOUGHT IT TOOK A LOT OF THE FLAVOR OUT BUT THATS JUST ME LMAOOO. anyway s5 killed Garmadon, and I was a little sad cuz I like him okay??? I just think he’s NEAT, he’s got big dad energy, he was teaching Lloyd some shit that just got DROPPED and literally was never brought up again which is honestly a theme in Ninjago. Ninjago drinking game: take a shot every time they introduce a plot point or ability and drop it at or before the end of the season. WHICH THEY ALSO DID IN S5 WITH A DIFFERENT POWER ACTUALLY, so all the ninja are masters of Spinjitsu right, well s5 introduced the concept of Airjitsu which only Spinjitsu masters can learn and it lets them FLY and they used that for seasons 5 and 6 and then they nEVER BROUGHT IT UP AGAIN EVEN THOUGH IT WOULDVE COME IN HANDY FOR S E V E R A L DIFFERENT SITUATIONS ACROSS THE SEASONS, ONE OF THEM WOULD BE FALLING TO THEIR DOOM AND MY ASS WOULD BE YELLING “YOU CAN FLY, DUMBASS” - anyway, they do that again later lmao it’s fine. But what’s low key NOT fine is they made Nya the WATER NINJA!!! Like I’m not mad she has powers, except I kinda am, she was doing just fine as Samurai X and honestly the only reason she has super special ninja powers is for plot reasons. Also Cole got turned into a ghost, but by s7 he’s????? No longer a ghost????????? And that’s NEVER addressed or reasoned away, so like. Cool lmao
S6 didn’t happen. Like, canonically, s6 ends with wish fuckery that undoes the entire season and none of the characters remember anything that happened except Jay and Nya because S6 is the season where they get back together so they remember all those events for???? Feelings reasons?????? Unclear, moving on. The actual bbeg for S6 was a djinn with a vaguely Spanish accent, and to this DAY I don’t know why they made him have a SPANISH accent. Djinn are Arabic, not Spanish!! They’re not central or South American, either!!!! Your villain design makes no sense, do better
S7 had MORE time fuckery, and retconned what happened to Kai and Nya’s parents and hmmmhmhmhmhmhm that makes me Upsetti Spaghetti :3 not just the retconning, but the fact that they LITERALLY brought them back oNLY TO NEVER MENTION THEM AGAIN!!!!!! LITERALLY!!!!!!!! Okay so at the VERY very beginning, like pilot episodes beginning, Kai talks about their dad like he died/left fairly recently, BUT s7 contradicts that and claims that both of their parents were essentially abducted when Kai and Nya were little kids, which makes me question what in the fresh fuck two little kids were doing for all those years alone. SETTING THAT ASIDE FOR A HOT SECOND, their parents were also apparently good friends of Wu’s and old war buddies (from the Serpentine wars, which is YET ANOTHER bit of the timeline that doesn’t quite add up but honestly I could make a whole other post about that shit). But if they were such good fucking friends, why didn’t Wu check in every now and again??? What the fuck was Wu doing that was so fucking important that he couldn’t have been assed to visit his friends ONCE in like TEN MOTHERFUCKING YEARS and realize “oh shit, they’re not here and there are two tiny children running around unsupervised…My Kids Now : )” LIKE????? WU YOU LOW KEY SHOULDA LOOKED OUT FOR YOUR FRIENDS’ KIDS BETTER, THEY COULDA DIED BRO!!! Uhhhh the time fuckery also results in Wu getting yeeted ahead in time a bit and the ninja gotta find him
Season. Eight. I have…mixed feelings about this one. The beginning absolutely SLAUGHTERED me, and not in a “this is so fucking funny” way. No, the beginning made me feel like I was being flayed alive with just about every episode because Ninjago was back on its forced romance bullshit and this time it was Lloyd’s turn on the chopping block. That hurt my soul cuz like, look at that mans color scheme, he’s CLEARLY alloaro, why are you forcing romance on my aro man, why would you hurt me like that, BUT ALSO BECAUSE HE AND THE GIRL HE WAS BEING SET UP WITH HAD A LITTLE HEART TO HEART REALLY EARLY ON AND IT WAS THE MOST QUEER CODED SHIT!!!! IT DEADASS READ AS A CONVERSATION BETWEEN AN OUT AND PROUD QUEER AND A CLOSETED QUEER AND THEY MADE!!! IT!!!!! STRAIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!! The only thing that kept me watching at first was wanting to find Wu, and then I started enjoying myself once Cole found a plot-relevant baby and had fatherhood thrust upon him. Everything went from “ehhhhh” to “holy shit this FUCKS” once it was revealed that Rumi (Lloyd’s love interest) wAS PLAYING HIM THE WHOLE TIME AND WAS EVIL AND HAD AN EVIL GIRLFRIEND!!!!!! LITERALLY IMPROVED EVERYTHING ABOUT THE SEASON FOR ME, I COULD EVEN FORGIVE THE WHOLE “let’s resurrect Garmadon, but as evil as possible” BULLSHIT!!!!!!
S9 is a continuation of s8, Garmadon is back and 1000% Evil, 10% Dad, but none of the Dad energies is directed at Lloyd - it’s all directed at Rumi, and honestly I could write a whole ass post on just RUMI cuz that’s honestly my DAUGHTER and I LOVE HER and I’m MAD SHE DIES AT THE END OF THIS SEASON!!!! SHE DESERVED THERAPY AND TO LIVE WITH HER GF AND MAYBE SOME CRIME. AS A TREAT. RUMI DESERVED BETTER AND LOW KEY IM GONNA WRITE A FIC ABOUT IT, BUT ANYWAY WHERE WAS I
Ah right, so s9 has the four major Ninja stuck in the original dimension with no way home, while Lloyd has no powers (cuz he almost died last season) and has to somehow lead a resistance against Garmadon (who has taken control of Ninjago City and is working on the rest of Ninjago). Actually, s9 is pretty cool. Like, the end of s8 and into s9 are low key my favorite episodes, and I kinda wanna rewatch them now -
S10 is a FUN one. Garmadon got got last season, but he didn’t DIE, so he’s in cold storage and now there’s Another Threat and he’s the only one who knows wtf they’re up against so they let him out and he works with them. The funny part is, he is still Very Much Evil and doesn’t quite Get emotions like he did when he was, uh, human lmao, sO HE WOKE UP EVERY DAY DURING THAT SEASON AND DECIDED TO CAUSE PROBLEMS ON PURPOSE. IT WAS THE FUNNIEST FUCKING SHIT. 1000000/10 MY FAVORITE GARMADON, he ended that season by literally fucking off into Ninjago and they never decided to track him down 😭😭😭😭😭and I’m so SAD about it dude
S11 has another Serpentine as the bbeg, though in the setup to that they retconned how the fucking Serpentine tribes and history work??? I think???? Also Wu was a good 150% angrier and generally Done with the ninja’s shit, which was honestly refreshing tho I’m not quite sure I liked what the refreshed view was, but whatever lmao. S11 also had the ninja get yeeted to the dimension farthest from Ninjago, and honestly - okay, so they didn’t all go at the same TIME, Zane left about a week or two before the others did but there was time dilation fuckery afoot which I’m not too mad about cuz low key it makes sense. What I AM mad about is that they didn’t play the angst up to its full POTENTIAL!!!!!! Zane was EVIL in the other dimension!!!! Okay so I’m Ninjago he was only gone for maybe a week or two, but DECADES had passed in the other one, and all that time Zane was alone and disconnected from everyone he knew and loved, with a staff that boosted his power while slowly corrupting him and Turning Him Evil to help him, and like???? The thought of Zane trying to find a way home, trying to get SOME sort of message back, while he has to use the staff more and more to help him survive the long, lonely decades, so that by the time his family DOES show up its too late??? BRO. B R O. THAT JUST HITS DIFFERENT, BUT NINJAGO DIDNT DO THAT!!! THEY MADE HIM EVIL DUE TO MEMORY WIPE!!!!!! MEMORY WIPE IS BABY SHIT COMPARED TO A LONG, SLOW CORRUPTION!!!!!!
S12 was alright. It went into Cole’s mom, touched on some of the adventures she had had, threatened another forced romance (this time on poor Cole, just leave my mans ALONE) but thankfully didn’t follow through this time, introduced cool new powers that honestly hasn’t been elaborated on since that’s the most recent season I think lmao
Anyway thanks for reading and letting me rant!!!! I have,,So Much More I could talk about, PLEASE ask me about Rumi, some of my headcanons re: Garmadon and Wu’s dynamic, the Serpentine, my top five times they butchered Kai’s character for Plot Reasons, or anything else I brought up here that you want me to elaborate on!!!
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kinktae · 4 years
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The penultimate part🥺 I’m not ready to say goodbye, Bitchin!Jungkook has definitely been one of my fav characterizations of him that I’ve ever read. Thank you so much for sharing your work with all of us💖
bitchin 9 asks bc i suck
sapphireprinces5 said: bitchin’ pt9 was just so beautiful?? the way you explained the emotions and interactions between the characters was just amazing!! I felt myself hanging on every word wow excited for the end but will miss bitchin’ so much 🤧
Anonymous said: TAEHYUNG AND YARA SIGN ME UP GURL!!!!
Anonymous said: Like I just feel like if Jk really liked y/n he wouldn’t have slept with Kiri, you know? It shouldn’t matter that he didn’t know how y/n felt. And it’s obvious that he has feelings for y/n so I just hope that’s something y/n addresses when she talks to him. Don’t settle for less girl! Get you a man who will fight for you regardless 👏 (btw this is not me criticizing how you wrote it in any way! I’m just so invested in the characters and am thinking about how I would feel in this scenario :) )
Anonymous said: I KNEW SOMETHING WAS GONNA HAPPEN WITH YARA AND TAE I FELT IT SO DEEP IN MY BONES IM SO HAPPY FOR THEM 😭😭😭
Anonymous said: Hi! I just binge read bitchin in a day and can I just say that I loved it! I really love the female characters as well, you’ve written them so beautifully 🥺 if I was y/n I wouldn’t be concerned so much about Jk not sleeping with Kiri if he knew the way y/n felt, but rather the fact that if Jk didn’t want to sleep with Kiri, he wouldn’t have, regardless of y/n’s feelings or not. IMO y/n’s feelings shouldn’t be the issue here, but Jk’s should! If I was y/n’s bff that’s what I would tell her LOL
Anonymous said: OH MY GOODNESS! YES !!!! YESSSSS Y.E.S Muchas graciaaaas!!!
Anonymous said: tae and yara are my new ship)
unknowntalesx said: okay but like tae and yara thooO they got me all smiley being like oh yeah bayyybeEE das what im talking about 😏 ALSO OKAY NOW THAT I AM MORE LUCID KIRI GOT FUCKING WRECKED I LOVED THAT SHE GOT A DOSE OF HER OWN MANIPULATIVE MEDICINE I AM 😤😤😤😤😤
Anonymous said: im not ready for bitchin to end )):
Anonymous said: I SCREAMED WHEN Y/N TOLD KIRI THE TRUTH. YES QUEEN. STAB AND TWIST THE KNIFE!
Anonymous said: ROSE AHHSHSJSKSD FUCK U I’m all hot and bothered with anticipation for pt 10 now 😩😩😩🥵
sydney--chan said: We really stan y/n for using her big ol brain to rock kiris world oh my god I yelled also I say what's your damage all the time bring that shit back
Anonymous said: a tae x yara spin off series or one shot...... haha jk..... unless..... 👀
Anonymous said: Fuck kiri's scheming ass. I'm glad YN ripped her a new one
Anonymous said: AAHHHHHH once again, I love this chapter so much!!!! I was screaming at Yara and Tae part. Seriously!!!! I am SURE she felt that spark when he kissed her. Is she going to be the one falling for the guy while he wants something casual now? Or maybe Tae will fall for her as well? Ahhhh so cute! I feel like that would be a nice spin off yk (no pressure, I swear). And Erik, woah I didn't expect him to be like that. To be so nice and wise. Great character development indeed! It was really nice (1/2)
Anonymous said: To see their interaction and the way he opened her eyes (for some reason I couldn't help but picture him as Namjoon). Ohhh the Kiri part tho!!!! I felt really petty but in the best way lol. Anywaysss I am really excited for the last chapter (really sad too) and I am sure it is going to be the best because you are a genius! Thank you for sharing another amazing chapter with us! ♥♥♥ (2/2)
Anonymous said: OKAY I absolutely adored Bitchin part 9 😻 I always thought that it was also OC fault for what happened between her and jk, he obviously was the main jerk but she never actually admitted her feelings to him and he doesn't read minds so??¿¿? Really loved that she came to understand it. And I was rooting SO MUCH for yara and tae MAN I AM CRYING THEY DESERVE IT 🙌🏻
Anonymous said: you came through with the tae x yara content we all needed omg thank you!! if anyone’s gonna make yara fall in love it’s tae lol
Anonymous said: I honestly lowkey hate bitchin’ jungkook right now. I thought I’d get over it but I just can’t imagine how hurt and disgusted Y/N was when she found out that jk and kiri were together just hours before they were like ugh. It doesn’t help that I’m also really interested in Erik’s character development now so it would’ve been really interesting to see how he’d fit in Y/N’s life. 🥺
Anonymous said: jungkook and y/n wANT what yara and tae have
Anonymous said: TAEYARA YES FINALLY OUR WISHES HAVE BEEN ANSWERED 😍😍
Anonymous said: just want to let you know you’re an absolute angel and all you create is nothing short of perfection. *sends you all of the love*
spring2787 said: I jus came from a 4 hour long class and it's finally here... Thank you so much dear 🎂 💜
Anonymous said: Is yara me ? Like when she said that boy act like they understand the no string involved but then fall in love , dude I felt that , that's literally the story of my life lmaoooo Like the number of time a dude told me yeah I'm okay with that and then acted shocked when I told him I didn't feel anything for him is impressive lmaoo Anyway I'm so eager for the last chapter!!!! you did an amazing job!!
kuhweenbri said: The way I already finished but anyways girl I absolutely loved this part and now I’m excited for the next part 😭😭 will we be seeing more of T-ara??
Anonymous said: OMG YARA AND TAEEEEEEEEE. NOW I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEANT BY FANSERVICE. JSJSJSJJSBXBSBSB But on a serious note, this fic just keeps on getting better. The fact that there's only one chapter left still hasn't come home to me 😭 but thank you so much for blessing us with this!💜💜
Anonymous said: YO! bitchin is flippin brilliant! you have done so well! jungkook broke my heart in part 9! im emotional but also so ready for part 10! please take your time. have a lovely day
Anonymous said: i don’t normally talk to writers on here but bitchin is really bitchin, i haven’t read a fanfic in so long that makes me excited to read the next part and maybe it’s because i’m so used to all of the aus being recycled but bitchin is truly a breathe of fresh air to me for some reason, maybe because you fleshed out the right hand mans for both characters idk or the it being a different time period, but i just wanted to say you are smashing bitchin dude and i love it!!
shy-kpop-girl said: BITCHIN': I just caught up on 8 & 9. Shocked & angry at JK. Because regardless of whether he knew y/n' feelings it was a dick move to sleep with Kiri one night and y/n the next morning. And it wasn't like he came over to talk/tell y/n about Kiri & things escalated because he went right at it as soon as she let him in. Even tho it was hot. 😳 But Erik. I wanted to hate him but dude surprised me with his reasoning. I loved that dialogue! Once again your writing is amazing & I love this story!
Anonymous said: Bitchin is the best fanfic on tumblr. And no one can change my mind. You’re doing amazing!! Much love xoxo
Anonymous said: “Think of life as one big puzzle and everyone you meet is shaped differently, right? Yet somehow… they fit. We find those that complete us. And they’re not necessarily opposites but—“ MAAM that part hit SOOO different omg your brain!?! Outta this world! Like this is whole ass literature!!!! I stg Bitchin’ is the best thing on this app and I meant that w my whole chest.
Anonymous said: I'm not ready for Bitchin to end. It's soooooo good 😍😍😍
kmultifandom said: Since there's a cast for bitchin I wanna audition for y/n because i wanna be a biologist and I have some similar personality traits *mic drop* Also great work, I seriously love it. No other fan fiction I have read was so close to my actual self and that impresses me even more and make it like it 10 times more djksksks
Anonymous said: how will I live when bitchin ends agghhh I haven’t even read 8-9 cause I’m waiting for the happy ending before I’m heartbroken and left waiting for the last part
Anonymous said: you know what would be super fun and crazy 😛😛🙈🙈 if you dropped bitchin’ pt 10 right now 😳😳 haha just kidding .... unless 😏😏
Anonymous said: lets gooooo!!!!!!!!!!! bitchin pt 10 better haunt me for the rest of the year
Anonymous said: I feel like I’m going to get so emotional once Bitchin’ part 10 is released. It’s like I’m sending off my non-existing kids to university because I won’t be able to see Bitchin!Jungkook anymore 🥺
Anonymous said: I can’t believe Bitchin’ is for real ending 😩 it’s soo gud 
Anonymous said: Can’t wait till bitchin PART 10 Probably gonna fall asleep before u post but I’ll try to stay up for it 🥺
Anonymous said: i love your writing honestly and i just really want you to be happy. your writing is immaculate and i really want you to know that you are talented and skilled so yeah. sorry if this is out of nowhere but i just really want to show appreciation to writers because they don't get enough and you are definitely my favorite writer:)) hope you have a good day!!
Anonymous said: okay but if Bitchin' goes on for 50 chapters that would be good too.. just sayin'.
tpo-quinn said: Bruh, I can already feel that I'm gonna cry from the last chapter of bitchin'...I CAN'T WAIT!
leojjeon said: so i've re-read bitchin ready for chapter 10 an I am feeling all sorts of emotions. it's fair to say it's my favourite series I've read!
Anonymous said: y did i forget bitchin would have an end like 😳😐we’ve been on this bitchin journey w u for so long i’m sad it’s over
Anonymous said: What what what?? Bitchin is ending??!!! Didnt it just fucking start like all the drama and tae&yara!!!! Omg girl!!!
Anonymous said: ur the absolute fucking GODDESS of writing angst, ive never ever waited for a ff to be updated before as if it was a new episode of my fav show coming out. thank u for writing and be so active, muah ur amazing
Anonymous said: a moment of silence for our loved bitchin who will die soon 😔 gone but not forgotten, she will always be in our hearts. all the best rides come to an end 😭
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zettaiunmeis · 4 years
Text
as much as i love this relationship between z 2.0 and ava, i kind of wish legends had developed the friendships between zari 1.0 and some of the time bureau ladies a bit more last season. bc like, maybe its just me, but i always kind of wanted zari to be that one person that sara and ava find themselves lowkey relying on, talking to when they can’t talk to each other. like, yes, i loved the friendships that zari 1.0 developed w sara and amaya and charlie but??? think of the potential she had with nora or ava or mona.
more below the cut because this got heated and long
(i know they sort of did that last one in 4x11, but it didnt feel like a very consistent thing, like. the charlie/mona relationship from that episode was far better fleshed out than zari 1.0 and mona’s and as much as i like that relationship, i feel that in a ep that focused specifically on z1.0 and mona, those two should be the ones who develop a strong foundation for a relationship, and that should have been really, pulled out through the season.)
and i guess that was my biggest problem w the nate/z1 storyline last season? while, yes, i liked their development, i felt like it took a lot of time away from z1’s relationships with other members of the team. 
i’d have really liked to see ava and z1 interacting and her sort of being both ava and sara’s go-to person when they needed something/someone to take charge or smth bc i can definitely see ava really respecting zari’s no-nonsense approach to the task at hand, and her ability to sympathise with others well.
and nora and zari was an interaction ive been hoping for since the very beginning of s4 bc that was how they seemed to set up the storyline: for zari to be ray’s voice of caution when it came to nora. like, i do love darhkatom, and i loved ray’s sort of “ill believe in your ability to be a good person even if you’re not sure you can be” attitude, i still feel like it should have been tempered by at least some other character’s caution about nora. and zari was the person that they clearly set up for that role. without that, frankly, the darhkatom plot seemed lowkey flat to me, because there was no one to be like, “i know i was always unsure about her, but i also thought she was trying to be better” after nora was accused of killing hank, and that made it kind of. idk like the darhkatom plot (and really all of ray’s storylines in s4) really kind of disconnected with the rest of the season.
and on a lighter note, nora and zari were the only two zoomers of the ensemble, and i really wanted to interact for the pure reason of future shenanigans. like, nora or zari saying shit like, “damn life was fucking schway when they still had sugar in candy” and the other just nodding like that makes perfect sense while the rest of the crew is like, “what is a schway??? what happened to sugar in candy??” and like. their shared future-present sort of gives them the ability to say like, “hey remember that one thing that happened?” and sort of process trauma that they might have both gone through because of the anti-meta laws and stuff.
and i guess mona and zari’s thing is what really kind of pissed me off bc. zari never really had a surrogate younger sibling friend on the waverider. (you can make the argument for wally or jax but jax already had his own established place in the ship and it really felt more like he was the older brother indulging his younger sister by letting her distract him with video games, and wally and zari were only developed for one ep before it was go time to throw the legends into season finale development.) 
with mona, their relationship was established, early on, as mona being the hopeful/cheerful one, and with zari being the cynic, much in the same vein as zari and ray. however, the key difference between zari and ray and mona and zari is the difference in character development between mona and ray, as of when they are developing their respective relationships with zari. ray is an already established character in phone home, and so, zari’s character arc uses him as a sort of,,, like those cages that they make for vines to grow onto. mona, on the other hand, uses the more turbulent character of zari to try and have them both grow together, in seance and sensibility. this more parallels the arc of sara and zari’s relationship, where zari acts as a sort of a younger sibling to sara. the whole development of mona and zari lends itself to a mona being the slightly annoying sunshine younger sibling and zari being the cynical if-you-hurt-her-you-die older sibling, and then,,, it just doesn’t deliver. instead, you get occasional annoying shipper mona, and irritated zari, and tbh thats just highkey disappointing.
and you can say that it isnt all about zari or that im being dramatic or that they just had a lot of storylines and not a lot of time but,,, frankly, id say youre wrong and making excuses. because the way the season ended, with zari being the one to give herself up, makes it fucking imperative that they try to get that goddamn emotion across to the viewers. and while they got plenty of emotion, it was solely because of the fact that people related to zari. instead, if they had spent zari 1.0′s last season developing all those relationships, instead of just nate and a little bit of charlie and john, they would have brought such a heavy emotional impact because holy shit she impacted every single one of these people, and not one of them even remember her.
im not saying that they shouldn’t have written steelhacker, or anything like that. hell, im glad they developed zari and nates relationship past the point they got it to in 3x11. but at the same time, if they truly wanted the most emotional impact out of the s4 finale, they should have had her be the fucking center of the team, not just nate’s girlfriend and charlie, john, ray, and sara’s friend.
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episodeshadow · 6 years
Text
ok im still letting a lot of the game sink in and while i had a genuinely good time playing forces theres a couple things i just gotta get off my chest as criticisms.
spoilers under the cut
ok so gameplay wise, i liked it! especially custom hero and tag team stages. modern sonics stages were almost as good, but there were times when reactions wouldn’t happen, or trying to turn was less responsive, he just felt a little too loose and slippery, but still pretty good. the classic stages were alright but after playing some of mania they just felt kinda eh :/
ok
one thing that bothers me is how tails was written... he’s depicted as helpless and can’t fight back, completely ignoring how capable he is.  in sa2 when he thinks sonic is dead his reaction is to fight eggman more determined than ever because sonics not there so he has to act alone.  in forces.. well knuckles says that he lost it a little but its not really said what.. but he isnt helping the resistance.  tails would have been at the forefront of the war effort with knuckles amy and the rest but instead hes off doing god knows what because?? and i know if he really thought sonic was dead it would be a lot for him to handle but i dont think the way they portray him accurately represents that. he only comes back when he finds classic. and anytime he is approached by an enemy he only ever cowers away even though its established he is very capable of defending himself in a fight. i dont feel like this game did any favors for tails. :/
also.. why is classic there? like story wise it just didnt feel like his presence was a big point in the plot, overall tails and classics little side story felt like just that - a side story that didnt quite gel w the rest of the story.  he was added to appeal to the 2d sonic fans but i feel like that wasnt necessary.. we just got mania, and if they hadn’t tried to shoehorn him in the dev team couldve spent more time working on modern sonic and custom hero’s gameplay and really adding depth.  instead, we get classic gameplay that feels just a bit too lackluster and modern gameplay that, while enjoyable, felt a little too shallow.
and thats another point i wanna make, is time.  the whole game feels rushed, both plot-wise and game-play wise.  the game itself is not long, i cant remember how many hours it took but it was not many, the stages were all. pretty short. it would have been cool to see a few more locations maybe? and more variety of boss fights or at least showing up in the stage. like why add chaos in the game and then not use them at all.  shadow wasnt a boss fight but he got his dlc so. metal and zavoks fights were ok too. they just. couldve done more. theres only so much story/cutscenes, with the passage of time just shown as text.  it doesnt really let the player feel  the consequences.  oh sonic spent six months in prison? its fine tho here he is again five seconds and one cuscene later.  it wouldve been stronger if we got to see at least a little bit of what happened in those six months.  how battles were lost. its implied a lot of people died, and while they likely wouldnt have shown that, they could have depicted the struggle.  the heroes fighting against eggman but without sonic they find themselves outmatched and caught off guard for the first time, and they tell themselves its ok its just one battle.  But slowly, over time, they win less and less, they see more and more people in terror realizing that this man who they saw as just a ridiculous scientist whos always defeated is suddenly a much more real threat.  We are told that 99% of the world is conquered by Eggman, but I don’t know if it’s just me, but it’s kind of hard to see that.  I just think it would be easier to get emotionally invested and really feel the sense of danger and urgency if we could actually get to see what led up to the point they were at.  They were all inside one bunker.  How did the whole planet become under an iron grip of Eggman that there were hardly any safe places to group?  I also can’t help but feel like the world was “reclaimed” too quickly.. all you had to do was take out the base and the whole area was free again? was the base the only thing that eggman had there? sure you take out enemies in the area but somehow it doesnt feel quite so impactful.  Although i will admit they do acknowledge this during the end, how the effort isn’t over and theres still a lot or work to be done.
likewise, theres just a lot of elements in the game that seem like they are supposed to be dramatic but don’t carry a lot of weight because they were not given time to stew... sonic was thought to be dead for six months but we don’t see them struggle without him and he seems just fine when he comes out of the prison; he’s ready to jump right back into action.  you could have just said he went on a space vacation and the effect would be essentially the same.
then theres the episode shadow dlc, where infinites “backstory” comes up.  we are told that infinte is a mercenary and was working for eggman, as a part of his army?? he was defending eggmans base, the rest of his squad had already been taken out by shadow.  shadow beats up infinite, infinite gets pissy bc he lost and decides hes not gonna be weak anymore, wears a mask and has the ruby.  Why did he react like this? He yells out that he’s not weak, almost like a mantra, even though Shadow never specifically called him that, just worthless and pathetic (damn, Shadow, chill).  Had he been called weak before? A problem he was already dealing with and Shadow just drove him over the edge? We don’t know. Actually, there’s a lot of stuff we don’t know about Infinite. He’s a guy, he was weak but then he wasn’t, and ? That’s it, the game doesn’t divulge anything about the Jackal Squad, we don’t know where Infinite came from, and we don’t even get to see his face in-game.  Although it could be argued that they left his story vague on purpose so that we could all apply our own theories, but.. there’s just so little to go on.  It’s hard for me to come up with specific questions because there’s hardly anything there to ask about.  
that was the main issue with me, everything was rushed.  i think i was expecting the game to go a lot deeper than it did.  Forces seemed to just gloss over a lot of the kind of details that would have made the story so much more gripping and worth getting emotional over.  Instead it felt more like going over a bulleted list of events; the cover summary instead of the novel.  Maybe I was expecting too much but I do think that they had a lot of potential that just wasn’t used to the best it could have been.  The story was there, it just, needed to be fleshed out a lot more. I’m sure there’s some plot holes too but I can’t remember off the top of my head.  Basically, I was hoping there would be... more.
ok thats what i wanted to say, i know im forgetting things and i dont know that any of that made sense but i just wanted to express the things i felt could have been done better/ be improved... i enjoyed the game despite all these things though and now that i typed up this lil mini essay im free to focus on the positives! :)
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i-amusemyself · 7 years
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All 100 Questions.
Bloody hell okay thank you!!! 😄😄😄
1. Is a kiss considered cheating?Yeah, Id say so.
2. Have you ever faked orgasm?Aint never had anyone to fake it with 😂 Ngl tho its the sort of thing id do (which is terrible i know)
3. If you could have one super power, what would it be?Mind reading.
4. Do you think youre gonna be rich in 7-8-9 years?I’d be worried if I didnt have more money than I have now, but idk.
5. Tell us some funny drunk story?Oh jeez erm, I don’t really have any 😂 My friends occasionally remind me of the time at the school christmas ball one of the business teachers turned up and I quickly ran away while aggressively whispering “oh no he knows im a lesbian, aimee told him”.
6. Why are you no longer together with your ex?We work better as friends, its less stressful.
7. If you had to choose one way to die what would it be?See I’m really torn with this question. Part of me thinks itd be nice just to go in my sleep, with a heart attack or something. Its quick and painless you know.But equally I wonder if it would be better to maybe, like, have something where I knew I was gonna die. Because then I’d have time to try and do everything on my bucket list and say goodbye to everyone. Also maybe at that point I’d welcome death lmao.
8. What are your current goals?Idk? Im waiting on A level results which I really hope I’ve done well in.I hope to make lots of new friends at uni and learn how to look after myself quickly I guess. I dont know.
9. Do you like someone?I like a lot of people 😆
10. Who was the last person to disappoint you?Im really not sure??? There arent many people I expect anything from and even then my standards are pretty low. So like, I dont really get disappointed by people, only occasionally by situations.
11. Do you like your body?I could hate it a lot more, but I wouldnt say I’m happy with my body or general appearance. I struggle a lot with my features and my weight and the scars I have (which is ridiculous but thats what mental illness is)
12. Can you keep a diet?I mean if I wasnt on the diet im on rn (with lots of restrictions) id probs be in hospital 😂
13. If the whole world was listening to you right now, what would you say?Honestly id pass out under the pressure of it 😂 idk, id tell them all to take a chill pill but no one would listen.
14. Do you work?Nah, i had 3 jobs at once last yeah but now I’ve ended up with none.
15. If you could choose only one food to eat for the rest of your life what would it be?Either garlic bread or chocolate I cant decide!
16. Would you get a tattoo?I’m v much planning on getting one in the near future so yh!!
17. Something you dont mind spending all your money on?Plane tickets.
18. Can you drive?Yeah! I havent driven since I passed my test, but hopefully I havent forgotten how to that quickly!
19. When was the last time someone told you youre beautiful?…I cant remember. Thats depressing (not that I blame them).
20. What was the last thing you cried for?Argh I have no idea why I was crying, my brain just wasnt doing its job so everything made me stressed and sad.
21. Do you keep a journal?I keep a blog for diary posts but besides that nah
22. Is life fun?If you allow it to be, yeah
23. Is farting in front of people irrelevant?Tf is that supposed to mean? I guess if you know the person well it is.
24. Whats your dream car?I dont know about Dream Car, id have to research it loads to decide what my absolute fave it. Although rn I’d really love a ‘67 VW beetle bc theyre small and cheap on insurance 😂
25. Are grades in school important?My own grades are super important to me, (to the point its probably unhealthy) but in terms of how the people around me do, it doesnt really matter to me. I mean, I want everyone to do well, but I dont judge people based on it.
26. Describe your crush.She’s funny and all around awesome and interesting and good at deep convos and beautiful and way out of my league.
27. What was the last book/movie that really impressed you?The last one I read called The Bell Jar. It was unlike anything I’ve ever read and made me think about a lot of things. Also I related a lot with the main character.
28. What was your last lie?Eh, probably “im fine”.
29. Dumbest lie you ever told?Idk?? I only keep track of the good lies 😉
30. Is crying in front of people embarrasing?It shouldnt be but yeah, I try my best not to.
31. Something you did and are proud of?Umm, idk im p proud of playing basketball and representing my region/training with england. But i quit that so 👏 dicks out for my regrettable decisions 👏
32. Whats your favourite cocktail?Never had one
33. Something you are good at?Annoying people and being clingy 😂 also maths ig
34. Do you like small kids?It depends on the child, the day of the week, the lunar cycle, my menstrual cycle, how hungry I am…Yh legit sometimes I hate them sometimes I love them.
35. How are you feeling right now?Great omg I just got my best friend to watch mamma mia and now shes high on life next to me.
36. What would you name your daughter/son?🤐 there are a couple of names for girls I like and like 2 boys names? But i dont wanna say bc theyre embarrasing.
37. What do you need to be happy?Good company, good food and possibly music.
38. Is there someone you want to punch in the face right now?Theres always at least 3 people I would love to punch 😂
39. What was the last gift you recieved?My best friend got me a necklace and I almost cried its so beautiful
40. What was the last gift you gave?The gift of my company @only-slightly-dangerous 😉😉😉
41. What was the last concert you went to?I went to to see Amber Run in february
42. Favourite place to shop at?Um, as in shop? A place called blue banana probs (england’s hot topic smh)
43. Who inspires you?Kaitlyn Alexander bc they helped me to understand who I am and how I feel and to be loud and proud about it.And Luke Cutforth bc he’s so open about his mental health and struggles with self harm but hes so happy now.
44. How old were you when you first got drunk?18 lmao
45. How old were you when you first got high?It aint happened yet (and i dont really want it to)
46. How old were you when you first had sex?It aint happened yet smh
47. When was your first kiss?As far as im concerned never
48. Something you want to do until the end this year?What….does this mean….? Idk???
49. Is there something in the past you wish you hadnt done?It’s more stuff I wish I had done tbh. I suppose I said things I shouldnt have or got too involved in drama, but you kinda need all that secondary school shit to learn from it
50. Post a selfie.Lmao nah fam
51. Who are you most comfortable around?My best friend by a mile. Privacy who?
52. Name one thing that terrifies you.Abandonment without explanation.
53. What kind of books do you read?Anything non fiction about medicine/being a doctor/disease/psycopaths.Besides that whatever has been recommended.
54. What would you tell your 12 y/o self?1. Youre gay2. You and I both know you arent joking about being “a dude trapped in a girls body” stop laughing it off and confront it.3. Stand up for yourself.4. Chill out.5. Laugh a lot more omg
55. What is your favourite flower?It’s between petunias and roses
56. Any bad habits you have?Not answering peoples messages unless theyre Certain Person A or Certain Person B.
57. What kind of people are you attracted to?Ones that are out of my league and could kick my ass apparently. Also ones that are kind, listen and think a lot I guess
58. What was the last thing you cried for?Already answered
59. Is there something you dont eat? A food that truly disgusts you?I dont eat loads of stuff bc my guts hate me 😂 but besides all that I’m actually the worlds least picky eater. The only thing I dont like is raw tomato. Thats it.
60. Are you in love?I wish
61. Something you find romantic?All the clichés ngl 😂 just anything that says “i love you” or “i was thinking about you” really
62. How long was your longest relationship?Like 4 months? Barely long term.
63. What are 3 things that irritate you about the same sex?Oh jeez i hate these theyre so stereotype-y1. Bitching2. Not supporting each other3. ….?
64. What are 3 things that irritate you about the opposite sex?1. Not supporting each other2. Massive egos3. Yelling
65. What are you saving money for?Uni so I dont starve to death!
66. How would you describe your bad side?Hmm, idk, it depends what someone did to get on my bad side. I’d say stubborn, bitter and angry tho usually.
67. Are you actually a good person? Why?I could be wrong but I think so long as someone has morally good intentions they are usually a good person, whether they always succeed or not. So yeah, I like to think I am.
68. What are you living for?My friends and the hope I have for my future.
69. Have you ever done anything illegal?Piracy? Thats it.
70. Do you like your money?….did I type this question wrong or??
71. Have you ever made someone feel bad about themselves intentionally?Okay, the honest answer? Yeah. When I was a lot younger and less mature and someone said something that hurt me, I tried to retaliate with equally hurtful comments. I like to think I wouldnt do that now.
72. Ever sent nudes?Lol no
73. Have you ever cheated on someone?Hell no
74. Favourite candy?All candy hates me 😂
75. Is there a blog you visit everyday or almost every day? Tag them.Yeah @oneshappyplace knows I regularly spam her with notes in search or Quality Memes (im so sorry)
76. Do you play any computer games? Whats ur fave?Nah, as if I have time 😂
77. Favourite TV series?Argh I canny choose? I love the IT Crowd, I love supernatural, I love Sherlock, I love in the flesh…
78. Are you religious? Does God exist?I’m not religious and personally I don’t believe there’s a god or higher power but I could be wrong.
79. What was the last book you read? Did it impress you and why?The Bell Jar. See 27.
80. What do you think about vegetarians and veganism?I respect it I guess? At one point I was p much a vegetarian until I had to restrict my diet sooo. Tho I could never be one now, let alone a vegan.
81. How long have you been on tumblr?Too long 😂😂😂 Like 3 or 4 years?
82. Do you like chinese food?Love it!
83. McDonalds or Subway?(Never been to subway so) McDonalds.
84. Vodka or Whisky?(Never had whisky so) Vodka.
85. Alcohol or Drugs?(Never had drugs so) Alcohol.
86. Ever been out of your country?I’m currently in the USA so yeah 😂
87. Meaning behind your blog name?It’s p self explanatory and also v true
88. What are you scared of?Abandonment, deep water, knives, toys with battery packs.
89. Last time you were insulted?Ugh, probs like when I met up with a load of school friends for our leaver’s ball.
90. Most traumatic experience?I’d rather not answer that lmao (plus itd take a long time to type)
91. Perfect date idea?Chilling and listening to each other’s favourite songs while coexisting and eating fast food 😂 that or ikea ngl
92. Favourite app on your phone?Tumblr. Even though I hate it, it also keeps me sane.
93. What colour are the walls in your room?White and blue.
94. Do you watch youtube? Who is your favourite youtuber?I love so many youtubers omg. Lukeisnotsexy, mileschronicles, realisticallysaying and filthy frank are faves
95. Share your favourite quote.Pick your fights.
96. What is the meaning of life?To live life to the fullest so youre happy and have minimal regrets. Also to be kind and helpful so even if you dont change the world you might help someone else to.
97. Do you like horror movies?I think….? But I’m not good at watching them alone 😂
98. Have you ever made your mum cry? What happened?Eh…again, would rather not answer (we got some nice supressed memories here)
99. Do you feel lucky or special in any way?I’m still totally in awe of how lucky I am to have met my best friend from 3000 miles away. Like, the probability of it was so so slim and yet here we are.
100. Can you keep a secret?I think so yh! It’s something that I consider super important.
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tofnew · 7 years
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A VERY CRAPPY BUT EXCITED SHINEE WORLD V IN DALLAS FAN ACCOUNT
honestly i dont even really know how to begin this like??? i feel like i have so much to say it was just the best day of my Entire Ugly Life. im so honored i really am it was just the most beautiful experience ever nd also so funny lkafsfsa i can’t wait to share with you !! 
so first off: the Boys 
onew: i,,, i honestly cant believe such a human exists he was so beautiful i really couldnt take my eyes off of him (duh) and surprise surprise i cried so much seeing him. i was seeing my 1of1 in the Flesh yet again but this time i was much closer!! he came to my side a lot nd thank u @ god for this smiling tofu. he really just made me smile so much my face started to hurt. I LOVE HIM WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING I WAS A MESS THE ENTIRE EVENING 
jonghyun: yall his pictures dont do him justice he is STUNNING in person and i really mean that. it was so amazing to be able to witness him up close this time. when i was at the fanmeet i was in p2 but this time i was p1!! he no joke is such a smol bub its so cute kafdsafsa. THE BIGGEST CUTIE 
minho: tol. tol. tol. tol. sO TOL. i mean holy moly those legs went on for DAYS my friends. he never stopped smiling the entire show i just,,, he loves us so much and it shows! he made so many cute gestures nd teased key all night i Lov it
key: THE MOST BEAUTIFUL. THE MOST STUNNING. THE MOST ETHEREAL. but ofc thats to be expected by my mom. honestly he was serving so many looks and to see his cute dimples up close was such a treat. ALSO HIS ENGLISH MAKES MY HEART FUZZY EVERY TIME 
taemin: the most handsome meme to ever walk the earth! he’s actually shorter in person which was interesting to me but boi he has Long Legs. when he came back out in the 2nd to last segment with those black pants i was Shook. he didnt talk too much bc he was SO shy but i found it very endearing. jong kept poking at him like “we should make taemin say ___” aljlfkdsafda he looked like he was ready to Pounce him 
so they started with hitchhiking nd we were Ready ok like im not even sure you could hear the bg music bc of all the screaming it was insane. right when i saw taemin waltzing out i was at my feet screaming at my favorite meme !! god, their live voices are just too hard to explain. it feels like a warm hug if that makes sense 
JULIETTE GUYS J.U.L.I.E.T.T.E  JFDAS aka shinee’s top bop. i was banging so hard and key’s solo break dance was iconic. @ sm ent when will you stop sleeping on key’s talent???? it was incredible you could really tell they enjoyed performing that song 
when prism started playing my lungs were set on fire. i was ready for key’s ass shake nd my phone was out but the security chic was so annoying about it and right when his move was about to come up she was like “you cant have that out” ….. i WAS TWO SECONDS AWAY FROM RECORDING IT. lmao whatever she didnt catch me recording sherlock (—: 
REPLAY MADE ME SOB END OF STORY 
as youve guys have probably already seen because its EVERYWHERE key’s gucci clothes got burned nd i was laughing so hard i was choking. he was just like “funny story right? ////:” HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN TO A PERSON but tbh his new outfit was a+++ king of wearing good clothes
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i mean look @ it he was wearing a shawol colored suit Amazing. nd those heals… just kick me in the head??? 
yall knew i was gonna talk about sherlock. me: cried the entire song ((((: i was waiting for it tbh like i knew the line up of the songs so i was Ready when i heard that BRRrrRrRRRRRrrrr. i felt like i was the only one doing the chant it made me sad but im sure lots of others did it i just didnt hear!! i was yelling so much ik those girls next to me were annoyed. when onew did That Thing where he body rolls ajlfdsafdsa saved my entire 2017. 
hi this ended me: 
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I DIDNT GET TO HEAR WHAT HE WAS SAYING BC THERE WERE SO MANY PEOPLE SCREAMING (relatable) buT ISNT THIS JUST THE CUTEST THING LAFDSA HE MAKES ME SO HAPPY I LOVE HIM MORE THAN ANYBODY. this was jongyu’s talking segment when the others got changed!! jong lovs onew so much he just smiled at him the entire time 
taemin’s goodbye stage i…i dont even know how to say this bc there are no words to described how i feel. like i was so immersed in his performance that i forgot to wave my lightstick. i just couldnt stop staring at him??? some people were born to perform nd that person was lee taemin. that high note took me There 
minho is the new dancing machine taemin is Cancelled (no jk aljfsda) but for real his dance break in lucifer was so hype! i wish i could have gotten a video of it but that security lady was out to get me istg. if you see it watch it !! 
ALSO WHEN MINHO WAS ON MY SIDE HE WAVED AT ME AND MY SECTION I AJLFDS HIS SMILE CURED MY ACNE IT WAS INCREDIBLE. I WAS TOO SLOW GETTING MY PHONE OUT HE WAS ALREADY GONE BUT IT HAPPENED OK 
jong was v close too hes so beautiful and has crisp golden skin i…
omg jongyu’s duet… to hear it in the flesh… it was like their voices were made for one another. they both had their eyes closed and were so into it like that was more beautiful than a new born puppy. god i just want to keep hearing it over and over again
MY FAVORITE PART OF THE WHOLE ENTIRE SHOW WAS taemin was talking about, you know, how he was feeling about the show and being in dallas again nD KEY BROUGHT BACK UP THE DAMN GUCCI CLOSES BURNING nd taemin went “we aren’t talking about that” I LAUGHED SO HARD I SNORTED AND OFC TAEMIN WAS TOO. he’s such a little shit jklafsda
ONEW FELL DURING READY OR NOT HE WAS SO EXCITED AND HYPED ND HE FELL I WAS LIKE !!!!! I WAS ABOUT TO PRESS LIFE ALERT. my sweet babu he was just having the time of his Life. lajkfsa i was scared when he was on top of the metal stand spinning i was just asking god to protect his Clumsy Ass  
key tried to trick me with that “i know my english is…” YOU JUST WANT TO BE PRAISED HUSH ALFSLJ I WILL PRAISE YOU 
taemin’s little shimmy butt shake in 1of1 is so cute i cant believe i witnessed that in person. also onew smiled so much too i kljfdsafda !!! 
SELENE 6.23 WAS SO POWERFUL I FELT MY SOUL BEING RENEWED. JONGHYUN’S VOICE IS NOT A LIE TALK ABOUT A POWERFUL MAN 
now you KNOW my ass caught on camera onew spinning his microphone stand during dream girl. i never whipped out my phone faster. HIS ARMS WERE SO TONED I WANT HIM TO WHACK ME IN THE HEAD WITH IT
youre probably asking yourself “did mich Die during sherlock” nd the answer to that kids is yes… yes i did 
also jongkey is Confirmed. literally every single time key opened his mouth jonghyun just laughed his head off and slapped his knee. hes such a good bf!! 
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the most visual bfs 
jonghyun said that he loved our energy!! he said that the reason they were trying so hard for us was because of it and he wanted us to have a good show. well jong congrats i had the best evening of my entire 19 years of living on this god forsaken planet
TAEMIN STRUGGLED SO MUCH TRYING TO INTRODUCE THE NEW SONG AND HE GOT SO FLUSTERED IT WAS SO ADORABLE IM PROUD OF HIM
no shocker here but i cried my eyes out during an encore. all the boys lit up when they saw the banners and onew closed his eyes and swayed back and forth smiling. it just makes me happy bc shinee really loves us so much 
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i have like 1905233 pics of onew doing his windmill but look at him Go!! he’s doing That 
at the end they were all saying their goodbyes and telling us how much they enjoyed us and dallas! i think it was either jong or key but they said they definitely want to come back so you know my annoying ass will be there again to see shining shinee. ALSO THEY SAID TO EXPECT GREAT MUSIC SOON SO YALL KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS. they bowed to us and thats when the tears started happening again. it truly was such a magical evening and im so sad that it has already ended. i cant wait to see you boys again! please stay safe and healthy for the rest of 2017 and on!! 
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Episode 9 “Find out who your true friends are” -Aromal
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I DID IT I BEAT 15 DAYS I BEAT 13TH PLACE AND I MADE JURY AND PROBABLY MERGE I FEEL HOT
(a little bit later)
I'm so sad bc Dana has been the REALEST w me since day 1 and Mitchell lied to me about his idol so idek if I can fully trust him anymore and aaaaaah Looks like its me Mitchell Matt willow allie aro and whoever Mitch can pull over from the other tribe but I'm really sad my mom was idoled out its just not fair
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i hate double tribals i really do especially if its one world since everyone has to say something to someone else in order to save their homies and ALLLL offense i still hate the small talk so like what else is there for me to do besides get ma plants and chill. so the round started off with willow trying to talk to me but then completely going missing but then talking to johnny (home boy af btw. squad in the house) about how she can save all the newbies using mitchell and danas vote which basically confirmed what i already knew of the old makiura alliance being tight. but that only leaves 2 people to get voted out and that is me or ryan which 1. duh and 2. not today satan. i quickly established ma thang with johnny even more so he can continue to give me info that i needed on the newbies like aro/zak having an idol to use on each other, lily having the makiura one, etc but it also got me thinking that maybe i should continue to try talking to the newbies cause they seem festive but then willow goes and lies so i said fuck dat. ryan and johnny made like 2 alliances with us on the same day which i high key didnt see the point of doing bottthhh but ya know be festive. they came up with this idea of splitting votes which i never like doing really since it is really sus af but i told them ayy great plan whatever just to make them not yell at me for not being alive but thEN! i was like this high key makes no sense to do??? so if there is a rat then im just going to stfu so no one can have tea on me and guess what. RYAN THE RAT???? [4/24/17, 8:52:11 PM] Dana Barry: So i know there's a vote split [4/24/17, 8:52:20 PM] Dana Barry: Not to be blunt [4/24/17, 8:52:49 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Okay :S [4/24/17, 8:54:07 PM] ~~Johnny~~: How do you know about the split? [4/24/17, 8:57:19 PM] Dana Barry: Ryan is blowing up your alliances game to gain favor on the other side [4/24/17, 8:57:31 PM] Dana Barry: They literally all know and have been in contact since the plan was conceived [4/24/17, 8:58:50 PM] Dana Barry: I know we havent talked a lot, but i really didnt think you were going to vote me [4/24/17, 8:58:56 PM] ~~Johnny~~: And I’m assuming that Ryan has been getting you guys to vote for someone else? [4/24/17, 8:59:00 PM] ~~Johnny~~: That isn’t LA? [4/24/17, 8:59:09 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Because Mitchell just said that he wasn’t voting for LA [4/24/17, 8:59:13 PM] Dana Barry: Nah it isnt [4/24/17, 8:55:19 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Why do you even think that though? [4/24/17, 8:55:36 PM] Mitchell Kalabang: Is it not true though? [4/24/17, 8:56:42 PM] ~~Johnny~~: It is [4/24/17, 8:57:12 PM] Mitchell Kalabang: I figured lol [4/24/17, 8:57:25 PM] Mitchell Kalabang: If we're being honest I've never been voting for LA [4/24/17, 8:57:37 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Who were you voting for..? [4/24/17, 8:58:07 PM] Mitchell Kalabang: If y'all tryna sneak split vote me out why would I give that up ! [4/24/17, 8:58:40 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Well, I didn’t want you out, and you were getting 2, but now I’m being told information about how you guys found it out [4/24/17, 8:59:06 PM] Mitchell Kalabang: Someone's got some pretty loose lips on ur side [4/24/17, 8:59:15 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Ryan? [4/24/17, 8:59:22 PM] Mitchell Kalabang: Not to name names but there's a reason this person went 6 times without making single digits idk mitchell and dana are savage as fuck fdkughdk (but yeah we all know the rest. and dana got voted out by someone who was too busy sleeping to know what the fuck was happening. if that is not me!) the alliance chat is popping tho of ryan and johnny arguing. turns out mitchell is just annoying and likes to spread shit so who is really the rat. hm. the answer to that is good ol' matt. the most annoying guy to talk to and the main person i have been dying to leave for ages. god. literally he has been against my side since the start of this game and he continues to make things hard for himself.... if you are going to be a rat dont be obvi? i still dont 100% trust ryan but i do trust that matt is fucking ratatouille in the flesh so there is that. cant even just pay attention to his own tribal ctfu. I HATE THESE PEOPLE ESPECIALLYLYLLYYLYLYL HIM
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Well this has officially been the craziest episode whatever you can call it of the season. Jacob went home as planned after complete chaos with Willow. Basically she told him I was targeting him just because she felt bad and it's cute and all that she has a good heart, but seriously she needs to get it together before I vote her off too. I think I have a lot of enemies now, obviously Jacob voted me and RTP played an idol and saved his ass after somehow Mitchell and Dana got everyone to vote him which was wild. I am so sad about Dana it's unreal I loved that girl. Now I still have Mitchell who hopefully hasn't lost any faith in me after I told Willow he had the idol, oops, and then lied to him and said I didn't say that because I can't own up to anything I did. Right now I am cooking I think, I got numbers, Mitchell, Allie, Willow, Zak, Aro, and even Johnny, and hopefully when it comes down to it I will be at the tippy top of the alliance since I believe firmly I have close relationships with many of these people. I flushed two idols tonight btw, and Daisy who had one, so in my two tribal councils I've literally just triple flushed idols like a really stinky poo. Ryan is mad at me but is willing to play the game but I don't trust his ass really.
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Final Confessional! I just got voted out, and I'm not actually very sad because i went out WITH A BANG and i'm on jury, where I will make it my mission to ruin lives. Effectively, nobody is this damn game can keep their mouth shut, which was both the best and worst part of this season. As I said in my last Conf., Matt was feeding us info, but basically fucked up that line of communication by getting himself caught as a snake. But about 2 hrs before tribal, Mitch and I get word that the other 5 on our tribe are splitting votes 3-2 for me to go out because they thought I could have an idol I guess. So at this point, Mitch and I were voting RTP and it looked like i was definitely goin. Mitch's idol wasn't going to be useful for us there, because even if he had given it to me (which he wouldn't have), there would have been a tie for him and RTP and his ass was grass at that point. So basically, we're tryin to think of options like 1.5hrs before tribal, and so Mitch and I just start goin nuts. I'm saying all this crazy shit to LA to make her vote with me: [4/24/17, 8:30:29 PM] Dana Barry: Listen- i know you guys are splitting for me tonight, but i wanted to talk to you first. [4/24/17, 8:39:09 PM] Dana Barry: I know we havent talked a lot- and there's not really much incentive for you to want to vote with me, but Ryan has been throwing you under the bus for days, basically since the game started. He wants nuTemoana to be a thing post- merge, which automatically leaves you out of any plan he has. [4/24/17, 8:44:06 PM] Dana Barry: I love ryan as a person- but he isn't with you long term, and i know you'd be taking a risk, but at merge we would have numbers. Also i'd be willing to vote whoever you are interested in taking out tonight, which would be a big move for you in this game, because inevitably you will make it far. This would build a lot of trust, which i DO NOT betray unless i find people are coming for me in this game. Sorry this is a lot, just something to consider as someone outside of the core alliance. [4/24/17, 8:45:53 PM] Dana Barry: Obviously this means I have no idol, so if you don't want me out and want options down the line, i'm here and i have no more options. And Mitch is on call with Johnny tellin him about how shady RTP is, and then eventually I get on with them where i'm literally hiding out in the bathroom of the bar to talk to them. So then we're all about to vote RTP, and for a minute there is some consideration for Lexi, but then Johnny is like nah RTP doesn't have an idol. OK-so at this point the four of us could just vote RTP. Then someone tells Lexi to also vote RTP, which she does. EXCEPT SOME FUCKER TELLS RTP TO PLAY HIS IDOL BECAUSE WE'RE ALL ABOUT TO VOTE HIS ASS OUT. LIKE OMG PLS EVERYONE HAVE SOME CHILL. So I know that Mitch has the idol, and i'm the only one on our tribe, so both he and RTP play idol, meaning that because Luca was asleep and voted me, my ass gets voted out. While I'm not sure how RTP found out he needed to play the idol, my best guess is Lex? Idk her well and she would be the most likely to be close to him and then just vote him as a cover for herself. Alternatively, some things were getting funky with the other tribe, where basically Matt and Willow (who was also being fed info by Johnny. like what?) also knew how desperately Mitch and I were trying to save me, and so maybe they reached out to RTP for some odd reason. Am I happy? NO.  But also I was so problematique tonight and really caused a problem, which is absolutely my aesthetic and i wouldn't have played it any other way. So, peace out Solomon, get ready for your most vocal juror. Please Mitch- you better be dancin and win this. 
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Hey! Remember me! I'm still here! Barely.... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H3ykj-8n1M4&feature=youtu.be 
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Mitchell is the gayest straight boy I know and I know myself when I was 12.
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Yay I made both jury and merge! :D Double yayy for making merge with a majority alliance! :D First merge vote is looking like Ryan and even people outside our alliance wants him gone. Rip
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This flag making challenge made me mad because I had an okay idea, but then the app I was using crashed like 50 fucking times, and so I lost all my progress. Since i kept loosing all my progress I didn't even finish with the extension oops. But if I had more time my idea was gonna be to also add quotes of what people have said in the tribe chat next to their icons.
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Pino Noir Caviar, Myanmar, mid-sized car You don't have to be popular Find out who your true friends are Pino Noir In the boudoir (in the boudoir) Pino Noir, smoke a cigar Revenge can be spectacular Pino Noir x4 (Pino Noir) Pino Noir, leather bar Oh so close and yet so far Pino Noir x4 (Pino Noir) Pino Noir, you're a star Listen to Tom Berenger Pino Noir, Rosenbar Pino Noir Au Revoir
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I won my first individual immunity !!! *screams* I didn't think I'd actually win this one but yay. I'm excited but I'm also really worried, people say I'm good at challenges and this win is definitely gonna put a bigger target on my back. It doesn't help that we tried to vote out Ryan either, cause obviously we are gonna have some trust issues now, we're still working together cause he says it's fine but he could just be saying that. It was weird having to talk to someone after voting them, usually the people I vote go home so this was the first time I had to talk to someone and try and fix the relationship and be like it was nothing personal. I'll see how this goes though, I need to try and be more social, its still my biggest problem.
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ayo! its time to party aka have a heart attack for the rest of the night cause i hate major votes like this and this is the most important vote since the start of the game.... im gonna die. anyways so prior to the merge i guess some of the female newbies were tired of the attitudes given to them by the returnee males like matt and mitchell (which understandable lmao i hate being told what to do even tho i dont show it most of the time) so they came to pretty much everyone and expressed their interest in switching to the other side namely ryan johnny and i's side. the thing is, i know i can trust allie since she hasnt proven otherwise that she can't but willow is just a very shady person to talk to and she is very much not talking game with me so as of now, who knows what she is actually doing. it also concerns since she is the one that told mitchell and dana about the plan we had to split the votes so that obviously doesnt make me want to trust her to any extent. in hand with that, luca has also been very weird and i can't trust him as far as i can throw him which isnt very far since im barely 5 feet so... bleh. he was trying to get ryan out before the start of the reward challenge and i just do not know man! these newbies suck ass. and not in the good way! but yeah i won the reward hehe and got the idol clue hehe but found nothing... so 2/3 isnt bad i suppose for this round and i knew i wasn't winning immunity since everyone in this fucking community talks the exact same way like what is in the juice? speaking of the juice... these people got very drunk last night and normally i love drunk people but last night.. a moment in time. funny enough karen was also drunk but she was a nice convo to have. but yeah about the drunk people, i dont know if johnny is trying to be the next parvati or he actually believes what he is saying to me for some reason but i will not take the bait. at times like this i appreciate my lack of social skills. but thats all folks. hopefully matt leaves (or ryan tbh as long as it is NOT me) and that alliance is shook to the core.
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So we just all said it's supposed to be Ryan and people are deadass so quiet rn that I'm like getting paranoid it's gonna be me but I don't wanna be that person who overthinks and then cut to me overreacting and making a dumb move and losing everyone's trust, so I'm just gonna keep my cool and if it's me tonight or something crazy allow this confessional to be proof that my ass ain't surprised.
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DO I HAVE A LOT TO FUCKING SAY IF IM STILL HERE IN AN HOUR!!!
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fuckfuckfuck the vote was set to be Ryan but apparently Willow told Zak something about another plan god im so nervous now
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