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angelicimagines · 3 years

Note

hello~ can i request a matchup, please? i'd prefer it from any danganronpa game!

my sun sign is capricorn, moon sagittarius and rising is virgo. my mbti type is intj-t. my pronouns are she/her but im completely fine with any other pronouns that are most comfortable for the person talking to me (does it make sense? i hope it does lol). my love language id say its mostly about acts of service? especially because i get tired/burnt out. on the opposite of that im not a fan of physical touch.. i get really uncomfortable with it.. however if my partner prefers pda then i might step out of my comfort zone from time to time but its still very limited.

about my appearance: i might be something between 5'5 and 5'6. im also very skinny and petite so i look really fragile. even though im considered skinny i wear oversized clothes just to hide myself. i literally wear some jeans and a huge tshirts/hoodies and call it a day. whatever is the most comfy for me. i am not into dressing up, i just want to survive the day. i have short dark red/black wavy hair, blueish/greyish eyes with really visible dark circles underneath them. my skin is also naturally very pale so that makes them even more visible. during summer my freckles on my nose and cheeks appear. i also have couple of tattoos on my arms. i overall am very insecure and unhappy about how i look like so i dont really know my real appearance? i dont look into mirrors so im just trying to be as objective as possible? (im a mess i really struggle with my body image)

im an introvert. plain and simple. i have a really hard time being around new people or generally between a big group of people (which is for me like 5 people in it). its also said that im quite difficult to deal with. im not really keen of making new friends because i simply dont know how and i kind of got use to it so im fine on my own. i may come off as rude which is unintentional. im just reserved quiet and anxious person. however i do have couple of friends so that means im somewhat comfortable around them, that means im not as quiet anymore. still reserved yes, but i definitely joke around a lot lot more. i think im guite funny and when it comes to humor i really prefer dark/morbid humor which happens to be very awkward in situations when someone trips and fall (especially children.. im not bad i just do t like kids) apart of that im actually very loyal, which i think is the best and most important quality to have. im also blunt. if i dont like something ill definitely say it out loud. like i said i have troubles with friendships and my social phobia doesnt help that at all. i just kind of dont understand it. i dont understand this kind of relationship and i dont even know how to maintain it. that just makes me really insecure and anxious and i simply start breaking any connections with my friends, because i just dont want them to expect much from me.. theyll just end up disappointed and annoyed with me but those whore with me for a long time know about these situations so theyre kind of used to it (thankfully). so in return im the most supportive and helpful person i can be. honestly i care much more about people around me than myself. im also (i dare to say) very intelligent and guick-witted so i often feel superior towards others. by that i mean academically intelligent rather than socially obviously. but it doesnt take long and get humbled by my own mind again with a reminder of my inferiority complex.

as for my interests i love sports, ice-hockey, soccer, gymnastics,.. you name it, video games, especially fps games, reading books, drawing (just sketching.. im not good at that but still) and listening to music. you honestly could never see me without earphones.. thats my must-have. i also love animals, especially my parrot. thats my best boy:) honestly couldnt live without him.. hes the best form of therapy

oof i wrote a lot.. if you want to you can ignore this.. but yeah:D im sorry for making it too long.. hopefully im not much of a burden to you.. have a great day~!

Hello! No worries! I hope you're okay with who I picked.

- Mod Toko

I match you romantically with...

Kiyotaka Ishimaru!

He'd get too flustered with physical touch so he's fine with just acts of service!

He encourages you that you are amazing [albeit with a layer of red on his face] to try and boost how you feel about yourself.

He secretly really likes your hair and tattoos- /gen

He tries to get you to be more comfortable with new people, but understands if you're not comfortable and will do pretty much anything he can to get you out of the situation if you wanted.

He questions your humour but isn't fully against it.

He tries to comfort you whenever you're anxious.

He likes that you're interested in sports!

He likes seeing you reading and drawing, makes him happy!

He makes sure you have everything you need to take care of your parrot.

[Mod note: I can't live without my headphones either- but I imagine we listen to very different music]

#mod toko #kiyotaka ishimaru #danganronpa matchups

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gendertrader · 5 years

Text

Physical Weight - 266 lb Height - 5′9″ Age - 24 25 mg Aldactone 1 month, 50 mg Aldactone 1 month

Because this is the first month that I’m ‘fully’ (due to reports suggesting that passing 100 mg may not be as effective as previously thought) on Aldactone, from here forward, I will report this as my first month.

Skin

Hair (body/head) [hairline, texture, thickness] I have noticed an increase in the amount of head hair that has fallen out over the past month. This was not initially expected, but after some review of anecdotal reports, this is not uncommon. Not enough has been lost to make it visible, but I will keep an eye out.

Face [hairline, cheekbones, facial hair, eyebrows, eyes, acne, skin] I have not noticed much change in facial structure as of yet, which is to be expected, but I’ve started wearing mascara more regularly and I’ve had an increase in acne, specifically around my chin, but it hasn’t been too bad. I’m interested to see how this changes as I was not a particularly acne-ridden teenager. I have started trimming my beard a little differently to further act as contour, and its growth has started to have a more significant effect on my mental health.

Body [fat, taste, libido, hair, calves, nail growth, testes, temperature] I have seen little to no fat redistribution (unsurprising as it often takes up to 3 months of a full hormone regimen to start seeing real changes), but there may be a hint of gynecomastia from the aldactone. I’m also learning to hold my body differently so as to accentuate the breast tissue, so any changes I’m seeing could self-influenced. I have noticed a clear increase in sugar, specifically chocolate, and salt cravings. I have started incorporating a shake of iodized salt during meals to prep for this month, when I anticipate experiencing much stronger cravings. I have seen mental health changes (please see mental health section for additional thoughts), which I imagine have contributed to the sugar cravings. Libido is...something. I haven’t started fully experiencing the loss of libido caused by anti-androgens, but I seem to be getting it in waves that sort of follow my typical ‘horniness fluctuation’ if you will. The primary difference is that everything is stronger: when I’m horny, I’m h o r n y but I can also go weeks at a time without masturbating and the sight of a hard dick does next to nothing for me. I’m interested to see how this progresses. Despite taking a daily 10,000 mcg dose of biotin, I’ve seen a decrease in nail growth speed and a slight decrease in nail strength. I used to be able to keep them rather long (good for painting, etc.) but they’ve been short for almost two weeks now (after I removed the pink fake nails pictured above) and little to no growth has occurred. Finally, and I’m not sure that this is due to Aldactone, I’m having a more difficult time properly digesting food. Part of me believes it’s due to my wearing high-waisted women’s jeans every day, which press on a part of my abdomen that isn’t usually compressed and could potentially disrupt flow of digestion through the stomach, but it occurs even when I’ve not worn those specific pants all day. I suppose this warrants additional observation.

Mental/Emotional Brain Fog I’m creating a new category specifically to mention brain fog. I have definitely seen an increase in what I must assume is the brain fog for which I see so many reports. To me, it feels like when you’ve been high for a really long time and finally start coming down - almost as if there’s a layer of thought that has been suppressed and you have to focus just a little more than usual to process the things happening around you. I imagine that, for somebody who has never been high, this could be rather disconcerting and difficult to navigate. Fortunately, I’ve been smoking for about 2 years straight as this point, so I have very little trouble living with a little bit of brain fog for now. I will make an update if I notice an increase in fog from 50 to 100 mg.

Depression There has been a slight but definite increase in depression symptoms. It feels like it’s primarily due to the energy-sapping quality of Aldactone, and less like I’m extra sad all the time, but the sadness-depression has increased somewhat as well. I imagine this is due to the fact that I’m no longer actively repressing my understanding of self as a transfeminine individual, so the masculine qualities that I dislike are starting to stand out more. Some examples of these include my beard (I used to go 1-2 weeks without shaving as I am a depressed graduate student and don’t always have the time/energy to shave, but I’m now shaving around twice a week), my face (a couple times while really high and having removed my glasses, I’ve seen Alex as she can be with estrogen but it usually lasts for minutes at a time, so I’m then immediately reminded that I do not look like this - clearly the typical trans experience, but I didn’t think it would be this strong for me and it feels like it’s only the beginning, so I’m strapping up), or my internal experience of being alive (it /feels like/ I’m on testosterone, and sometimes that just gets the best of me; during those times, I have to remind myself that wanting to be a girl is a symptom of being a girl. It’s then that it feels like I’m getting a taste of the true Trans Experience and I have to code switch into thinking how lucky am I to have so much room to grow which only helps a little but that’s more than nothing). I had a few boy days recently, which were nice because everything matched up, but it was somewhere closer to 3 or 4 days out of the month so I’m less worried about my boy days interfering with my transition. Finally, as I’ve stated before, even without the effect of the Aldactone, or the drain of coming out to everybody around me, or the strain of an actual social transition, it’s exhausting. Because I choose every day to take this medication that continues to bring me one step closer to my ideal self, I also inevitably must at least briefly consider what I am doing and the changes I hope to see, which is much more introspection on this topic than I’ve wanted to do for a while. I’m nervous that friends are going to find out before I’m ready (I’m in my final months of my master’s program so there’s no reason in my mind to attempt a social transition yet as I have other very difficult things to do already (I have a conference in which I present at the end of the month and I have to finish data collection and create a poster; I have to collect data for my thesis before analyzing said data and completing my master’s thesis before the April 22 (I think???) deadline so I can graduate on time; I have to find a job (lmao this is so difficult brb crying), which will include a million applications and half a million job interviews; I have to complete 2 additional manuscripts for publication (again, once data collection is completed); and I have to move to wherever I eventually get a job) and I don’t need a social transition piled on top because I’m already barely staying afloat as it is.

Anxiety There may have been a very slight increase in anxiety near the middle to end of the month, but I had also been on the same strain of weed for a while, so I wasn’t taken off guard at all.

#mine #updates #transition #trans #transgender #transfem #transfeminine #genderfluid #nonbinary #enby #fem-aligned nonbinary #fem-aligned enby #aldactone #spironolactone #hrt #diy hrt

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memedbts · 6 years

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for the bangtan asks: ALL

we are bulletproof: if you could be any superhero, who would you be and why?

none. i dont like all that marvel/dc crap. actually no, it’s not crap, just not for me...

no more dream: if you woke up tomorrow to be incredibly famous, how would you react?

omg idek tbh. i lowkey feel exposed lmaooo

i like it: if you could reverse any moment in your life, what would that moment be?

idk tbh anything that i said that caused an argument, caused things between me n another person to get awkward, or anything that made people change the way they look at me

n.o: biggest pet peeve?

kids that act older than their age for sure

we on: how do you deal with people who don’t like you?

already answered this lol

if i ruled the world: what would you do if you found out that you were an heir to a wealthy kingdom?

snatch up that money real quick

coffee: what’s your coffee order?

i dont really drink coffee but @ starbucks, caramel frap, extra whip n caramel

cypher pt. 1: if you had to be part of a kpop group, what position would you want to be (i.e. leader, visual, lead vocal, dancer, rapper, maknae, etc.)

maknae bc i like being the youngest. im the oldest sibling so its nice when i get the be the youngest

rise of bangtan: when and how did you get into the king and legends, also known as bangtan sonyeondan?

like november of 2016. i was reintroduced to kpop by some of my friends and boy oh boy did they make a good ass decsion

satoori rap: what does home mean to you?

a place where all my friends are and i can be myself

boy in luv: when you are interested in someone (romantically, sexually, etc.), does your behavior change?

already answered this tooooo lol

just one day: who would you want to spend the last day of your life with?

my family n friends. also bts if they could lmao

tomorrow: goal that you would like to achieve within the next year?

have a glo up HAAAAA

cypher pt. 2: one thing about yourself you wish people would appreciate more?

my personality and my advice. some people dont take it and then i end being right.....

spine breaker: what is your weakness when it comes to spending money?

BTS COMEBACKS HOOOOOOEEEEEE ISTG IF I BECAME RICH ID GO BROKE IN 0.0005 SECONDS

jump: favorite childhood memory?

anytime in preschool bc i had some lit ass friends

miss right: what is your ideal ‘type’?

umm.. funny obviously, i mean i want them to be somewhat attractive, decently smart, similar personality to mine

i like it pt. 2: dream date?

oooof idk i’d have to think about that one

danger: have you ever had a near-death experience?

no oh my god im so grateful that ive never had one

war of hormone: most embarrassing moment?

i fell on my ass in front of this big group of guys lmaooo

hip hop lover: three songs that are meaningful to you?

volume up - 4minute

return to pooh corner - kenny loggins (fight me)

rain - bts

let me know: are you good at keeping secrets?

it depends on who’s secret. if im not super close to them, i wont tell everybody i know, but i’ll most likely tell a few friends ooof. brutally honest lmao

rain: most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?

idek im not that impulsive i guess

cypher pt. 3: favorite outfit to wear?

my off the should pink lace thingy with jean shorts

blanket kick: longest time you’ve spent lying in bed (sleeping or not)?

from like 8 to like the next day. i was dying rip

24/7 = heaven: what are you most looking forward to?\

next year volleyball and kpop club

look here: do you have any hidden talents?

no rip

second grade: proudest accomplishment?

3.96 gpa

i need u: are you in love?

nah

hold me tight: does physical contact comfort you?

it depends what kind of physical contact

love is not over: ever had your heart broken?

nope

dead leaves: how loyal are you?

100%

move: last time you cried?

yesterday

butterfly: most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?

bts existing

run: do you like traveling? if so, where? what’s your dream vacation?

yes! honestly like hawaii or something

ma city: if you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

hawaii ha im so basic

baepsae: do you vote and/or keep up with politics?

not old enough to vote but when i am, i will. and yeah i guess. im not like SUPER into politics but i know for the most part whats going on. i think ill pay more attention when i can actually vote.

dope: what did you want to be when you were younger? how does it compare to what you want to be now?

i wanted to be an actress. now ive realized im not cut out for that.

fire: are you a spontaneous person?

it depends on who im with but like not really

save me: your favorite place on earth?

my room tbhhh

young forever: what is one movie from your childhood that you will always treasure?

idek just like the childhood show movies that they made

boys with fun: you’re going on a roadtrip with seven other people– dead, alive, fictional, real, famous, or not. who are they, and why?

yall already know who im bout to pick with 7 people lmao

converse high: how many pairs of shoes do you own?

not exaclty sure, also not about to get up n count. but probably around 10. but i only wear about like 3 or 4

whalien 52: weirdest thing that has ever happened to you? alternatively, weirdest dream you’ve ever had?

this was real. i was walking my dog and this guy with nothing with underwear on was standing outside on the porch screaming. mind you, i lived in a nice/decent neighborhood.

house of cards: when was the last time you felt sexy?

NONE

boy meets evil: have you ever committed a crime? if so, what was it? alternatively, what is the worst thing you have ever done?

never committed a crime. imma good child lmao. but the worst thing ive ever done was call someone from my friend from nz and for 50 minutes and cost my dad, $200 lolllllll

blood, sweat, & tears: kinkiest kink you have?

um. im not there yet sweetie

begin: who are you most grateful for in your life?

my parents and my friend group from where i used to live

lie: biggest fear?

spiders n death

stigma: would you rather know the date of your death or the cause of your death?

cause bc then i can prevent it possibly

first love: do you believe in soulmates?

i guess

reflection: if you could tell your past self one thing, what would it be?

get into bts earlier

mama: are you good at giving advice?

yeah i am

awake: if you had to be a flower, which flower would you be?

pansies bc they’re my grandma’s favorite

lost: how good are you with directions? do you get lost easily?

i dont lost easily unless people are distracting me

cypher pt. 4: what do you do to treat yourself or relax?

i do face masks, add some extra steps to my skin care

am i wrong: you wake up one morning in the hospital, knowing only your name and a single memory from your life. what is that memory?

a memory where im reflecting on all of my memories. HA

21st century girls: do you prefer texting, calling, or video chatting?

depends on with who

2!3!: your favorite thing about bangtan?

their personalities

spring day: who do you miss right now?

my old friend group.

not today: what are you procrastinating right now?

this project for agriculture and natural resources oop

wings: on airplanes, do you prefer the window seat, the middle seat, or the aisle seat?

when we first take off, aisle, but as i get comfortable in the air, i can do window

you never walk alone: how many people do you trust with your life?

my old friend group and my parents.

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constel-langst-ions · 6 years

Text

Cover-Up

*Loosely based on other tattoo fics and amazing tattoos Ive seen (all will be desribed as best as possible)

Warnings: Previous self-harm, scars, tattoos

—

No one really knew why Lance wore long sleeves and jeans all the time, per say. It was normal for him to be seen like that, always with his jacket on. No one questioned it, either. Only Hunk really knew what was below the heavy clothing.

—

They all found out after a particulary hard training session. Allura had called them all into the common room.

“Paladins! I have exciting news!” She announced, her voice unusually chipper, losing her usual loud and demanding tone. Everyone listened, eager to know the news.

“Me ane Coran have organized a day off. We wanted to congratulate you all on your improvent over these last few months!” She finished, holding out the last note. Her hands were clasped together, and she wore a large grin, the kind that made you start smiling with whoever wore it.

All the paladins wooped, chattering away about their plans for the next day. The only one who wad quiet, was Lance. He simply gave a small smile, adding a brief comment if a fellow paladin shot a tease or idea his way. If someone hadn’t been involved in the conversation, they could’ve guessed that he didn’t look forward to it.

They all turned to go to their respective rooms, before Allura sharply inhaled. They turned to her, eyes wide in surprise. “Sorry, paladins! It seems I have forgotten to add that the planet we’ll be stopping on has one of these ‘beaches’,” She air quoted, “that you all seem to love will be there. It is a peaceful planet, not dominated by any species, so do not feel the need to bring your bayards.” She rushed out the last sentence, having said it all on one breath.

“Now, shoo! We will be arriving in a few of your Earth hours.” Her face twisted with confusion at the term, and the paladins left her, laughing with glee.

—

“Woo-hoo!” Lance cheered, collapsing onto one of the couches. “This is gonna be awesome!” He smiled, positive energy radiating off of his form.

Pidge waved her hands at him, making a mock face of disgust. “Gross, get your happiness away from me.” She sat beside him, fiddling with her collar.

“'Dawh, Pidgeon, why so down? Afraid of the Lochness Monster?” He sprang at her to emphasize his own teasing.

“No, she’s probably afraid of sunburns.” Keith, having flopped onto the couch opposite to them, piped up. “I dont know about ypu, but I’m defintly going to burn.”

Hunk and Shiro finally sat down, hunk letting out a little noise of amusement.

“Me and Lance will probably tan, if there’s even a sun. I mean, I hope there is. What’s a beach day without the sun?”

“Don’t worry, guys, we’ll bring sunblock. Maybe snacks.” Shiro said, a smile tugging at his lips.

As if they had planned it, all the paladins shouted, in unison, “You’re such a dad, Shiro.” They all crumbled into giggles at that, Shiro affectionately rolling his eyes.

“Alright team, lets get ready for tomorrow and make it a fun day. No stress, no fights, and no computers.” His eyes landed on Pidge.

The girl squawked in astonishment, the rest of the paladins laughing and giggling as the stood and walked out, leaving a mildlu annoyed Pidge to deal with Shiro.

—

The minute Lance arrived in his room, he threw off his jacket and practically ripped off his shirts, kicking ogf his pants as fast as he possibly could. He sat down o his bed, wearing only boxer briefs.

He looked down at himself, and at the splashes of color on his arms, legs, and chest. And, beneath those, the white lines that littered his body.

“Oh god, how will they react?” He moaned, hugging himself.

His tattoos didnt help much to cover the scars; they were still clear as day. They started at his ankles and went up to his hips. His arms were worse. From his wrist bone to his elbow, there were scars. Thin and white, always mocking him for how scared he had been.

He couldn’t get a body suit; it’d be suspicious, and he would definitely be asked about it.

Feeling his stomach start to feel empty with anxiety, he started thinking about his tattoos, looking to get his mind off of the worryting thoughts that plaged his mind.

His first tattoo that he had ever gotten had been a warercolor wave on the inside of his left arm. It was long, stretching from his wrist to his elbos, effectively covering most of the scars. It was beautiful, different shades of blue making it look real, completed with white tips to represent ocean foam.

His second one was on the inside of his right arm. It was the solar system, each planet beautiful decorated in a different, vibrant color. Each had a splash of watercolor around it, as if someone dropped paint on it. It was probably his favourite one.

After the solar system, he got a tattoo on the middle of his chest, going from his belly button to right below his collarbone. It was a ribcage, plus a spine, and instead of limbs, it had flowers growing from it. The top faded to a rose, a petal ending before his collarbone. It was plain, simple black and gray, but it had taken the longest out of the others, and was the most painful.

Finally, the one that meant most to him: wings. He had a tattoo of wings on his back, them being large and so delicately tattooed, with attention to detail, that they almost looked real. The feathers were a vibrant blue, the same as Lance’s eyes.

From there, he got countless tiny tattoos that litteref his body. On his collarbone, he got the planets in order. On his other collarbone, he got a quote, saying 'I refuse to sink’ with an anchor beside it. He helf that quote dear to his heart.

He would never forget the story behind each tattoo, and how much they meant to him.

—

Without realizing, Lance had fallen asleep. He woke up to the sound of Allura’s booming voice over the comms, announcing their arrival to the planet, named Deshion.

He inwardly groaned, pulling on his pair of blue swintrunks before he threw on his normal outfit. Afterall, it was still a short trek to the area they would be staying.

He stepped out of the room, nearly running into Hunk as he did so.

He took a step back as Hunk nearly jumped out of his skin.

“Woah, sorry bud! I was about to come wake you.” Hunk grinned, searching Lance’s face for any sign of negativity.

“Nah, Im okay.” Lance looked Hunk up and down, silently congratulating the yellow paladin for his choice in wear. He was wearing yellow swimtrunks, with white, flowery prints on them. He was also shirtless, much to Lance’s surprise.

“Are.. you dressed..?” Hunk asked, looking at Lance with confusion.

“Hmm? Oh, yeah!” He snapped back to attention. “Yeah, yeah. I have my shorts on beneath.”

“Cool! Well, everyone’s waiting on the bridge for you, so whenever you’re ready, meet us there so we can go. The castle already landed.” And with that, he sped off.

Lance huffed and shoved his hands in his pockets making his way to the bridge. He was slow, and his face had lost the usual lively expression. He was not looking forward to this.

—

Lance regretted wearing his full outfit to the bridge. When he arrived, everyone was already wearing their full bathing outfits, Pidge even wearing a bathing suit (a.k.a, Lance mused, green shorts with a black tanktop.) He felt out of place, and ignored the team’s concerned glances.

“Are we gonna go, or what?” Lance grinned and fingergunned, even adding in a wink for extra reassurance. Collectively, they groaned, and all started walking into the escape pod. (the pod thing that leaves the castle? Idk man)

—

As soon as they got down, they saw Allura and Coran setting up towels and umbrellas. To Lance’s surprise, there was even a picnic basket in the middle.

But what really caught Lance’s attention was the crystal clear, blue waters. He almost burst into tears at the sight, but stopped himself. It had been so long since he had last seen an ocean, and he longed to play in the water, while splashing his teammates, and collecting shells. He wanted to bask in the sun and do chickenfight, and lose, just to let Pidge have the triumph of beating him

But a voice in his head nagged him. No, it said, you cant. They’ll see the scars. Judge you. Leave you. Give you pity. If not that, they’ll judge those tattoos.

He shuddered at the thought. All of those choices were terribls. But hey, if he was being judged for either of those things, it wasn’t new. People who saw the cuts left him, mainly friends. Or complete strangers saw them, and called him a freak.

The tattoos were worse. He was always called out for them, usually by middle-aged people, calling him rebellious and other nasty slurs. It sucked, so he resorted to wearing jeans and a jacket, even in the dead heat of summer.

And, he thought, even now, on the beach. He sat down on one of the towels, having promised to join the other paladins later. He watched as they splashed and played and ran. Watched as they did all the things he wanted to do with them, oh so badly. It tugged at his heartstrings to know that he lied, he wouldn’t join them. He couldn’t.

He couldn’t risk them leaving him, too.

—

Pidge sat on Hunk’s shoulders letting out a battlecry as she went to knock Keith off of Shiro’s shoulders. Much to her happiness, she had caught him off guard. He flailed, before falling backwards, ultimately taking Shiro down with him.

She jumped off of Hunk’s shoulders, ignoring how Keith stuck his tongue out at her. She turned to where Lance was sitting.

Why hasn’t he joined us yet? She thought to herself, narrowing her amber eyes on his still form. He was just sitting there, absently making shapes in the sand. He hadn’t even changed into his swimtrunks, for God’s sake!

Pidge knew she should’ve been somewhat suspicious, but this was Lance. He was a good actor, and Pidge knew it.

“Lance!” She called, waving her arms at him, “You said you’d join us!”

That seemed to grab his attention, as his head snapped up to look at her.

“Uh..” He looked like a deer in the headlights, and she would’ve laughed if it wasnt for him wincing.

—

“I cant..?” Lance cringed at his own excuse. It was terrible, he knew, and by Pidge’s expression, she knew too.

“Uh, yes you can.” She retorted, crossing her arms in annoyance.

“Lance, you promised.” She said, giving him puppy eyes.

Oh god.

He can’t resist that looks, and Pidge fully knows it.

Reluctantly, he stands. Well, its now or never. He thought to himself, standing up and tugging his jacket off.

—

Pidge watched as he stood and took off his jacket. Then his shirt. And that’s when she saw the tattoos.

She inhaled sharply, the other paladins following her gaze. Their jaws dropped.

Lance, with his perfect skin that he cared so much about, had tattoos.

All of them were floored. Each tattoo was detailed, absent of any mishaps. It was obvious that each had had much time and effort into them. Congrats to that tattoo artist, Pidge thought, they’re good at their job.

—

Lance slowly shed his clothing, dreading the moment when he would be close enough for them to make out the scars. He took off his pants next, pulling his swimtrunks higher up onto his hips. And he walked, inner arms pressed against himself as he folded his arms, attempting to hide the most visible scars.

—

Pidge felt her heart sink when Lance was close enough to them. Now she could see the tattoos, but she could also see the scars underneath them. Reallt, it was obvious. It was also clear that the tattoos were meant to hide them. It didn’t work. They could all see it.

But, she could also see Lance try to hide it. He had his head down and arms crossed. Yet, they all knew. And Pidge had just forced him out of his comfort zone, just because she wanted him to be there.

“Lance..?” She questioned, her voice quiet. She could hear the teams suprised gasps, and the noises the made after them, disheartened.

“Pidge.” He looked up, shooting her a cocky grin. But it was forced. His smile dropped, and he shifted uncomfortable.

“Look,” he started, uncomfortable, “I’m sorry. It happened in my past. I got these tattoos to cover them. Yadda yadda, big ol’ sob story.”

No one said anything, just standing as the waves lapped at their legs.

“If it makes you guys uncomfortable, Ill go find a swimshirt.”

That snagged Pidge’s attention. “Uncomfortable?” She spoke, utter disbelief in her words. “You think we’re uncomfortable?” She almost cried at that.

“Lance, we’re sad that you would ever do this, but we’re not uncomfortable. It makes me proud that, even though you have scars, that you’re willing to show them anyways. Not everyone is like that.

Lance seemed shocked at her words. Still, no one moved.

Then Lance shot forward, engulfing her into a hug. She let out a cry of protest.

"I’m so sorry Pidge! You didn’t deserve to see that. But.. just…” He stammered, reluctant, the rest of the team joining in on the group hug. Cooing softly, whispering reassurances and praise.

“It means a lot to hear you say that, Pidgeon.”

#langst #i guess #trigger warning #self harm #scars #no real flashbacks #just thoughts #tattoos #angst??#decently happy ending #first actual fic #hoped you enjoyed #i gotta focus on a diff essay but whatever #i wrote this in one go on mobile so i feel like death #tw //#my writing

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strandedglitch · 3 years

Text

Hello world, it's me Kylie

date:08/5/2023

This is my first entry....I dont really know how to explain my situation, I dont even know what I am supposed to write...hell that is a lot of I dont knows.

I could be speaking into the void and writing this will go in vain but I guess this is my weird way of coping? Either way the comforting glow of this screen as I type is my only friend at the moment.

To start from the beginning, Gosh...I feel crazy just typing this but...I was doing some exploration in the state of New Mexico, It was a nice summer...Fairly hot and dry. To be expected of course coming from this arid region of the United States, I just graduated from college with my degree in Computer science and I just wanted to let loose and go on a cross country drive from Massachusetts to California, I just wanted to treat myself for all the hard work I put into my bachelors degree, Im young and for the first time in forever My face was looking at other things rather than staring for hours on end at standarized tests, Papers for essays and the eye straining computer screens.

I made a small detour stop in New Mexico...Now youre probably wondering Why New Mexico? Well..Im a bit of a nerd and thought of checking out some historic sites, Including that of an old nuclear test site which I will not disclose the name of. Now..This place is radioactive...well atleast a little bit...Not too bad atleast I thought...I went a bit further than what was legally allowed , equipped with my backpack which only had my laptop, charger, a bag of chips and some candy, These are my essentials I dont care what anyone says.

well..I got to see some cool glass looking objects imbedded in the white sand, it must of been formed from all the heat from the nuclear explosions...However something felt odd...Off I would say. My head felt like it spun and for a moment.. I felt the ground under my feet suddenly disappear, You ever have those dreams of fall and then you just wake up? It was like that.

Ive decided that perhaps it was being exposed to free radicals mixed in with the aweful sweltering heat..My immediate thought was to go back, Pretend I never went any further than what I was supposed to...treading back clad in shorts and a t shirt, the sun now was highest in the sky my lips were beginning to chap and my Somewhat bronze skintone was tinted with red sunburn.

when I got back to what I knew was the spot of the historic marker I parked infront, I was shocked and dismayed my car was nowhere in sight, I could almost feel my heart sink to my lower stomach about to burst out of my very being at any moment. Someone must have stolen my car, that was the only plausible explanation.

I was stranded, alone and In a god damn desert. I began to walk amoungst the long stretch of road hoping and praying to whatever god may be out there for someone to give me a ride out of this place. I wasnt prepared to die, I was only 23 years old. God,I know Ive been a peice of shit sometime in my life but ya gotta give me a break. It was about an hour or two before I saw a old dark red sports car speeding down the road distorted by that classic heat mirage that distorts the air above any tar road.

Oh damn, Maybe there is a god...Perhaps this is my chance time to flag them down, So my dumbass did what anyone would do...I got in the road and waved my hands around hoping a speeding car would stop.

I gulped of what little spit I had left when it got nearer luckily slowing down, Quickly I walked over to the driver side window to be greeted by A dude about mid thirties his skin was tan with a freckle here and there, Wearing a button up brownish red dress shirt with short sleeves, high wasted blue jeans and complimented with a cowboy hat and sunglasses. He looked at me lowering his sunglasses to get what I assume a better look at me as I leaned in from the window. The conversation went something like this.

Me: "Hey uh.. Can you give me a ride to the nearest town, Im out here and well my car got stolen."

The man nodded " I can give ya a ride but the next town is 'bout a 20 minute drive from here"

Me: Thank you, So much your're a life saver. ('God I hope this guy aintsome creep)

"The name is Daniel, By the way...Hop in the passenger seat just be careful of Missy she can bite if handled incorrectly"

I nodded and headed over to the passenger side, Missy? Was this his dog? I didn't see no dog. I opened the car door only to be greeted with a hand gun tucked inbetween the seat and center console of the car. ...Fuck of course he has a gun my luck. Deciding against every alarm going off in my head, I hopped in made myself comfortable in the seat and closed the door. Off we went. The ride was very boring despite the risk that is hitch hiking. He talked about having a horse ranch out east and enjoys riding them on occasion, Even putting them through a competition or two. I said I just graduated college and looking for a job in software engineering or technical support..Just something to make money from.

He looked over at me like I had snakes for hair. " That wasn't a great choice of career, Darlin.' You ain't gonna be making jack shit. Aint nobody round these parts can afford a computer or need one for that matter. Whatever fancy place you hail from, best go back cause there aint much out here to help you with that."

I was mind boggled, Was this guy for real? Everyone has a computer, phone or other internet connecting device. Even if the area was on a tight budget enough, Offices and schools still had systems. What was he thinking?

It would be another 10 minutes before a town appeared in the distance, I took a breath of relief as I leaned back in this leather seat. We passed a sign I didnt bother reading, The only thing on my mind was food and air conditioning.

Hah.... Well...I thought everything would be great..I'd go to the police give them the description of my car, plate number and everything would be fine and dandy right? Wrong...Dead wrong..You see At first I didnt think anything was off...some people drive old cars but Not an entire town dedicated to it, Maybe there was a car show? That wouldve been the case if everyone including the buildings were also dressed in quite vintage styles.Big hairdos, bell bottoms, Colorful clothing, Old fashioned cars. I felt like I was dreaming, Maybe I passed out in the field of heat exhaustion? No...This was all too real.

Daniel pulled over and wished me luck on getting my car back, handing me a 10 dollar bill, Tipped his hat and drove off. The first thing I did was go into the munincipal building to talk to someone who could point me in the right directions, I hit a bell at the help desk, taking a notice of the lack of computer equipment in the office and a calander on the wall. It was secured there with a red tac and it read August 5th 1970. There was the feeling again, My head spun faster than a damn fidget spinner. I was on the floor after that, everything went dark.

Long long story short..Im in a hotel room after convincing ambulance drivers to leave me alone and that Im fine, They gave me a cold bottle of water, allowed me to sign release for denying medical treatment. Lets just say...They looked suspicious when I asked the date.The full date..It was the same date as the calender...Shit. Im still trying to wrap my head around this...I somehow ended up in the fucking 70's because I walked a little too far from a damn historic marker, excuse my language. My theory is some kind of weird woowoo science stuff must of happened at that sight there and they didnt want us normal people going there cause they knew there could of been these time portals...Or alien...theres always aliens involved in these consiracy theories right? Eh...Im not too much of a conspiracy theorist anyways....All I know is some weird shit is going on.

Ill get back to you with how Im doing, Hopefully I can figure things out.

Logging off:

Yours, Kylie

#ic #introduction #stranded #Diary entry

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sweetbfs · 6 years

Note

as a trans guy i get p dysphoric about my clothes, and ive tried wearing “””guy””” jeans for a while now but i dont think they help me much as passing bc im rather short (5’1”) so they tend to look a little baggy or loose especially when i sit down and i know clothes dont matter but some part of me tells me im not really trying when i want to wear my old jeans that actually fit :// (i also feel bad that my mom buys me jeans n i barely wear them) (i do enjoy the larger pockets tho)

as a trans guy with huge hips and a tiny waist, i’ve had so much trouble finding jeans that fit. not all guys jeans will look masc on you, and not all “girls” jeans will look fem on you. imo the best types of jeans are high waisted, plus if they’re too long i just cuff the ends up once or twice for added Gay Artsy look. in addition, the only thing you can do is try on guys jeans until you find the type right for you. belts help a lot, and you can find cheap and durable ones at h&m or target. as for “girls” jeans, try high waisted styles a size or two up. they should be baggy enough so they’re not skin tight, but not too baggy/loose. tbh i’ve had better luck w “girls” jeans, but you never know! try target, h&m, forever21, or old navy/gap. and don’t feel bad, at the end of the day it’s fabric and some types won’t always make your body look masc. good luck bud! - mod andy

Hey, I´m 5´1 and I have the exact same problem ! The thing about jeans is that you need to look for the right cut. Also, a good rule of thumb is that women´s run small and men´s run large - us short guys wanna aim right down the middle. If I´m in the women´s section I always look for boyfriend, straight leg, or relaxed fit jeans. In the men´s/boys sections, I look for skinny, tapered, sometimes bootlegs, or I try on enough jeans to find something that works.

Find something that can stay up without a belt, but fits perfectly when wearing one. Belts are a really ”masculine” accessory that not only can help you keep from looking frumpy, but that add a streamlined and professional look to your outfit as well. This is a tangent, but I´ve discovered (due to private school dress codes) the magic of belts as of late, and I´d recommend all guys out there pick up 2 belts - one brown, one black (there are some cheap & plain ones at Walmart - just make sure they fit). Also, it´s conventional to match your belt color to your dress shoe color. If you ain´t wearing leather shoes, you can forget about that.

Back to pants ! A fact of life for shorter guys is ill-fitting pant legs. For jeans, the easy way out it to cuff them, James Dean style. Rolled up legs don´t stick out or look frumpy so long as you style them right and that the cut of the jeans allows for a cuff that hangs closer to your legs rather than looking like Kevin Smith´s jorts. If you´re going the cuffing route, cuff them while trying them on in the store to make sure they look alright. If you think cuffing looks bad, you´re gonna have to have them altered.

Altering jeans isn´t as scary as it sounds. The easiest way is to just measure out the right amount and cut them off. It gives a worn and frayed look to the denim, as well as ensuring that you don´t trip on the long legs. If you hate the frayed denim trend, either you or a family member/friend are gonna have to seam the new pant legs - either by hand or by sewing machine. I´m rusty with my sewing skills, but there are plenty of youtube videos that can walk you through the process better than I can. If you don´t have that option, find a local tailor. Taking up pant legs is one of, if not the, easiest alterations out there, so it shouldn´t cost you much.

I know you only mentioned jeans, but I´m going to talk about slacks as well (sorry, like I said, I´m a private school kid). I never wore slacks before this year, aka my first year at Catholic school. They aren´t for everybody, I´ll tell you that much, but I´d recommend at least trying out one pair, preferably cheaply made and without a liner. Again, I get all of mine from walmart. It all depends on your fashion sense, but because my fashion sense lies along the lines of ivy-league dropout, slacks work great for me. Even if you´d never touch slacks with a 10-foot pole for street clothes, they work great whenever you´re going to someplace snazzy and want to avoid the possibility of having only skirts or dresses to wear, so try and find one pair that fits and you think are half decent. As my grandma said: better to have them and not need them, than to need them and not have them.

Because slacks aren´t denim, there aren´t many skinny-jean-like slacks in the women´s section - most are more relaxed. The men´s section tends to have slacks that run wider in the ass than most men´s jeans, at least from what I´ve noticed, so do be mindful of that as well. You can cuff slacks, but tbh I never do and always have mine altered. I´m just the opposite with jeans, if you were curious.

As for where to shop, I can´t recommend thrift stores enough. They´re cheap and have great selection, as well as it´s easier to convince parents to let you try on clothes there that they would think are silly (ie clothes that go along with your gender identity) then it is at a Macy´s or something, at least from my experiences. Also - Walmart is great (g-d knows I´ve plugged them enough in this post), but I also wanna mention Target. While Xmas shopping for my dad, I bought myself a nice dress shirt from their brand Goodfellows that fit great for being a men´s dress shirt, which are usually a nightmare for me. They looked to have some really nice stylish pants that I´d recommend peeping.

I had the same problem with guilt over unworn feminine clothes. Talk to your parents about your clothes ! Tell them that your fashion sense has been evolving as of late, or you want to try the current trend of more relaxed pants. It´s annoying, but it keeps them from buying clothes that make you feel dysphoric, and help improve your chances of your parents buying you clothes that you actually like ! Though I don´t celebrate Christmas, my mother got me clothes that I loved this year as a gift. Last year I hated every piece of clothing she got me, but everything this year was wonderful and masculine, and even though we have to go back to the store because nothing fit (lol), I was genuinely really happy with my clothes.

And clothes do matter. Since coming to the conclusion that I was trans, I gradually changed both my closet and my body language over the past years and they´ve helped me pass a lot better. Despite being 5´1, skinny as a rail, and a junior, I had everyone at my Catholic school (correctly) assuming I was a boy, and (incorrectly) assuming I was a freshman for a good 2 weeks at the beginning of the school year ! Passing doesn´t matter at all, unless passing makes you feel better. It´s a shitty, cisnormative ideal that can be easy to reach sometimes, and impossible to reach other times. But if passing helps alleviate dysphoria for you, as it does for me and a ton of other trans people, then I wish you all the best ! Oh, also, get a watch ! Don´t ask me why it works, I honestly have no idea, but I swear it made me pass like a dream when I started wearing one. Get a decent, gender neutral/manly watch that´s at least medium on the size scale between tiny ”women´s” and giant ”men´s” watches, and you pass SO much better. Drop $20 at, of course, walmart, hit up the jewelry section of your local thrift shop, ask your parents if they have any you might like - just get one.

It´s like 1am here and I spent ages typing out that monster of an answer, I hope that helps and is somewhat cohesive. G´night anon, good luck with your pants !

- Mod Llewellyn

#asks #anon #trans #i made this fuckin post like 10x longer sorry an

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crzcorgi · 7 years

Text

One of a Kind

For Negan Smut Week!

Sentence Prompt: “You like to hold it”

I wrote something a bit different. This is not with Number 6

Negan x Reader

Y/N=your name

Warnings - Negan smutty goodness. Language. NSFW. Sexy aesthetic

1950 words- using the Keep reading feature

Want on or off my taglist? Just let me know!

@mypapawinchester @kijilinn @may85 @mamapeterson @flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash @negandarylsatisfaction @rapsity @strangersangel9 @wickednerdery @hannibalssweaters @ladylorelitany @angelak72081 @scarygoodfanfics @superpinkkcat @gageef @ericas-negan77 @miss-nori85 @ali-pennell @smuttwd @purplejellybean @concertxjunkie @magical-spit @jotilpip @thedeadwalks @negantrashlucille23 @johnthackerys @pandainfinitely @xdaddy-neganx @almostinwonderland @myheart4ever47-blog @lauryphelps1d @texasgal2222 @rizflo-blog @catleesi-xo @negans-network @negansmutweek

I apologize if I forgot to tag you, Just let me know with a slap aside the head! And @#% Tumblr won’t tag everyone, I’m sorry!

Shit! It was raining hard and I had the unfortunate luck to be heading out on a run. Rain in itself isn't bad, washes away any walker blood and guts your clothing might accumulate. But heavy rain made scavenging hard.

I was heading out with Simon, Frank, Jake and one other dude, can't remember his fucking name. I was once again the lucky one, the only female in the group. They usually were somewhat respectful, and if they weren't, well, I wasn't afraid to use brute force. And they knew it.

It always made me laugh when I think of how things are now, compared to what they were, before the end. I was a dancer, no, not a stripper, which is what most fuckers thought when I told them. Fuck, mind in the gutter. I was a ballerina, well, more like a ballet teacher. You know what they say, those that can’t, teach.

Anyway, my point being that I am small, and even smaller with the lack of 3 balanced meals. But I'm squirrelly, as Simon calls it. And I know how use most any object as a weapon. Simon's Negan’s right hand man. Simon is also my boss, I guess you could say, and probably the only friend I have in the Sanctuary.

And Negan. Negan is the man, the one who runs the whole show. The one who most are scared shitless of. But not me. Don't get me wrong, I do respect him for what he's done, is doing. It's not a job I would want. But he doesn't scare me. And I know that pisses him off.

I try to steer clear of him, never take runs with him, follow his rules, anything so he won't notice me. I met him when I first came to the Sanctuary. Got the whole Negan treatment. Work for points or be my wife and live like a queen. He says wife, I say sex doll, potato, potato. Either way, no.thank.you.

So that's why I'm on a run. It's either that or scrubbing toilets, hmm easy choice for me. Going on runs can be fun. You never know what you might come across. I've gotten some great stuff before. We aren't supposed to keep it for ourselves, it goes back to the Sanctuary to be sorted out. But I've pocketed a few items. What Negan doesn't know won't hurt him, right?

So I'm standing in the Sanctuary lot, in the rain, waiting for everyone. I'm always on time, they're always late. Nice.

“We don't need a fucking army for this run, it's just a fucking milk run, Simon!”

Shit! It's Negan! What the hell Simon, he knows not to put me on runs with him. Goddamn!

“Well, well, well! Dollface! Fancy meeting you and your fucking fine ass here!”

“Negan.”

“Is that all you've got to say? No, good morning sir? No, you are looking mighty fine sir, let’s fuck?”

Jesus! I just glare at him, hoping the heat in my cheeks doesn't show. “And why do we have the pleasure of your company on this run, sir?”

“Sir, I like your respect darling.” He moved closer to me, so close I could smell just how good he smelled. Ugh. He then proceeded to put his arm around me. “Take a page from this little lady men, re-fucking-spect, remember that!’

I turned to stare at Simon, hoping he could feel my anger. He looked at me and shrugged. Bastard!

I started for the van that Simon was driving, I always rode with him, when someone grabbed my arm. “You're riding with me doll.”

I gasped, “uh, sir, I always ride with Simon.”

“Well, change is fucking good, get in the truck doll.”

I climbed into the truck, already a sense of dread in my bones. This is going to fucking suck.

Negan opened the driver’s side door, swinging his beloved bat, Lucille into the truck first. “Help Lucille in doll?”

I took the bat, careful not to touch her barbed wire covering. She was cleaned up from her last outing, but I could still see bits and pieces of a job well done.

“Admiring my lady, doll? She is a fucking thing of beauty, no?”

“She's something alright.” I smiled, looking out the window and dreading this run already.

He started the truck up, radioing Simon to ask which way we were heading then stating we would follow.

Thank the gods the place we were heading to was a short drive. We got in, got some great things, not a lot in quantity, but quality. We were soon back on the road, no walkers or other survivors to be found. A successful run.

Well, I spoke too soon. Right after we started back to the Sanctuary, the truck sputtered to a stop. And unfortunately, we were the last to leave, the others had headed back before us.

“Fuckity fucking fuck! Jesus!” Negan picked up the radio, yelling at Simon. No answer. “What the fuck?!” He started banging the radio.

“They're too far out, sir, no reception. Once they realize we aren't coming, they'll come look for us. Until then, we’re stuck.” I sighed, picking at the wire on Lucille.

“Well, well, this is certainly a fucking predicament we are in. Most cer-tain-ly!” Negan turned in his seat, staring over at me.

“Soooo what do you suggest we do with our fucking time alone, darling?

The way he said alone, my body started rebelling against what I knew was right.

“I don't know, sir, sing some round robin songs? Maybe thumb wrestle?”

I vaguely heard something that sounded like a groan come from him. “Ohh, ba-by, you are so fucking adorable!” He reached over to touch my cheek, but I caught his wrist before he made it.

“Sir, please keep to your own side of the vehicle.” I looked back down at Lucille.

“You like my Lucille, sweetheart? She seems to have taken a liking to you also. You like to hold it, doll?” I could just hear the smirk he was wearing.

“I like weapons of all kinds, and yes, I do like Lucille. She has a nice feel to her, nice hold.”

He started laughing a deep gruff laugh. “I see what you did there. You thought I meant, do you like holding Lucille. But doll, that wasn't,” He leaned over, taking a hold of my chin and forcing me to look at him. “what I meant. Are you being coy with me?”

“Negan, sir, this isn't a good idea. You have your wives, I have my pride.” I'm not sure if I was trying to convince him, or me.

“Oh baby girl, I'm not asking for a fucking commitment, just a little bit of fuckity fun! You are too cute! And making me fucking hard as steel” He reached down, palming himself through his pants.

I glanced over, noticing just how large that bulge was. And then I threw all caution, and my self worth, to the wind.

Crawling over the truck bench seat, I situated myself right next to him, my knees against his thigh. I slowly removed my jacket, throwing it behind me. I then lifted my tee up and over my head, leaving me in just my purple lace bra.

“Well, darling, this is a most pleasant outcome!” He reached out, grabbing a breast in each hand and squeezing. I let my head roll back, enjoying being touched in this way, it had been so long. A moan escaping from me.

Negan moved his hand down, unbuttoning my jeans, slipping his long fingers down into my pants. He then leaned over whispering in my ear. “No panties doll? You ARE a dirty girl!” His voice causing me to shiver.

“Didn't have enough points to do my laundry.” I was able to rasp out.

I rose up on my knees, shimmying out of my pants, almost falling over onto Negan in the process.

“Woohoo, little bit anxious there doll!” He was unzipping his fly, pulling out his now totally erect, and quite thick, cock. “Don't worry baby girl, I'll make it fucking fit.” He sniggered. “Crawl on over sweetheart, show Daddy some fucking lovin’!”

I went to straddle him, slamming my back into the steering wheel. “Motherfucking shit!!!”

“Oh my my, such a nasty mouth on this one!” He laughed, but then repositioned the seat. “Better baby?”

“Much, thank you.” I rubbed my back.

I put my hands on his shoulders, steadying myself as I began to grind myself over his dick, lubing him up with my wetness.

“By the sounds you're making, I'm guessing it's fucking been awhile for you, hmmm?”

“Uh…yes… god yes.”

“I gave you other options y/n, didn't I?”

“Yes… but I…dont share sir.”

Suddenly, he lifted me up, then slammed me back down, impaling me on his more than adequate cock. I couldn't help but scream, the fact that it had been forever, and the oh so pleasant/painful stretch and burn.

“Ride me baby, ride me hard and fast like I fucking know you can.” Negan growled in my ear, sending his tongue in to explore.

The cab soon became full of obscene sounds, smells and sights. Windows completely steamed over, causing it to feel like we were in a sauna. The sweat running off our overheated bodies, tickling on the way down.

Our mouths were all over, biting, licking, little kisses, starting on our lips, moving onto cheeks, ears, necks, chests.

Negan was sucking on one nipple, fingering the other. I was pumping myself, up and down, making figure eight movements with my hips. I knew I was nearing my release, so I reached down between our heated bodies, quickly circling my hardened nub.

“Negan...oh…god…im gonna…” He grabbed my hand, replacing it with his own.

“Ok baby, come.”

As if on command, I came, screaming his name, among other barely intelligible curses. Negan withdrew, coming all-over my stomach. I collapsed into his chest, shaking.

“Feeling good doll?” He laughed. Placing his arms around me, he seemed to be hugging me closer.

“That was nice.” Sighing, I took in his smell.

Suddenly, the radio crackled to life.

“Boss? Everything OK?”

Negan sat up, letting his arms fall from around me. Grabbing the radio, he answered Simon. “Yeah, we’re OK, fucking truck, not so much.”

“Okay, we’re heading back for ya.”

“Shit doll, guess cuddling is out. Got to get fucking dressed”

I crawled off of him, scooching back to my side. “Uh, Negan, do you have something I can use to clean up?”

He laughed. “Use these.” He threw his boxers at me. “Now we can be fucking commando twins.”

I wiped my stomach off, trying hard not to laugh. “Well, that was an interesting afternoon.”

“Yes, it fucking was doll.”

After we were both dressed, we just sat there waiting for the guys to come back.

“I hope you don't think this was a one time thing doll.”

“Negan, I'm not going to be one of many. It's not what I do, what I am. I have my pride.”

Laughing, he said, “I wasn't asking you to be one of many, baby. You are definitely one of a kind, my kind.”

What the fuck did that mean?

I wanted to respond when Simon arrived. “Boss, you and y/n go get in the van, we’ll take care of this.”

I climbed out of the truck, grabbing Lucille. Handing her to Negan, I glanced up into his face, to see if I could see something. “I'm not done with you yet.” He rubbed his fingers on my cheek.

Oh god, my life just got a whole lot more complicated.

#negan #negansmutweek #negansmutweek17 #negans-network #negan's thirst squad #negan x reader #negan x you #negan fanfiction #the walking dead fanfiction #twd fanfiction #jeffrey dean morgan #crzcorgi crz 4 negan

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barblebapkins · 7 years

Note

all 👏 the 👏 asks 👏👏👏

at first im like “i wanna answer ALL of these!!!” but when it finally happens its more like “i have to answer ALL of these,,,,,”

Fresh milk - What is your age?

i am a 22 year old yungman

Teeth - What is your gender identity?

male

Honey - Do you have a nickname?

online, its barble, booble, bibble, barbie, ect ect. irl, i’m usually just called Ry, tho a new manager has started to call me Ry-Bread and i fucking hate it so much

Breast - Do you get along with your mother?

i wish i did, i’ve tried to fix stuff with her so many times but she always manages to ruin shit again

Angelhood - What is one of your favorite memories?

staying up until like 7:30 am watching all of the 2012 berserk movies with two of my friends, i was emotionally scarred and dead tired the entire next day

Tranquil - Who do you laugh the most with?

probably my brother, lil shit is fun to hang around with

Adieu - Who do you dread saying goodbye to the most?

anyone really, i love all of my friends and family, wouldn’t wanna lose any of them

Wax - Can you keep a secret?

of course what kind of person cant

Tinderbox - What do you cherish most?

my computer but really, all of the people that call me their friend/loved one. as introverted as i am, i thrive off of people being close to me.

Paper - What is your favorite novel?

the other survey asked me this lmao, i havent read a full book in a long-ass time, but the best one i’ve probably ever read was Green mile

Box office - What is your favorite film?

again i havent been caught up on movies in a long time, but i love love love UP and a few movies from the MCU

Stage - Do you have a talent?

hahaha

Tiger - What is your bravest moment?

probably uh like, when i first got my job at five guys???? i 100% lack confidence in myself so when i finally applied and got accepted it was like the biggest step i ever took in my life

Treasure - What is your brightest characteristic?

my charismatic, attention-drawing presence /s

Morale - Is your castle made of glass or stone?

what???? this question is so unclear?? i guess it means how fast i am to give up and be defeated, in that case its more like a castle of air

Wolf - Do you have an inner monster?

i have a somewhat short temper which doesnt mix well with how easy it is to make me uncomfortable, and i’m super paranoid about everyone around me at all times and what they think about me lmao whoops

Seven - Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy, or Pride?

sloth i guess cos i havent done anything with my live

Trick - White lie or deceit?

another weird question, this is like “is it worse to lie a little or lie a lot” ?? white lie i guess

Illusion - Do you have a secret?

who doesnt

if you want me to tell you, i’m not gonna u FOOL

Heart - Are you in love?

i was a few months ago, not anymore

Mary - Are you a virgin?

DONT CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS YOU PIECE OF SHIT QUIZ

Bedroom - How would you define your sexual orientation?

i dont even know anymore dude. i’m teetering on the edge of ace and demi, tho i don’t know a lot of people that consider demi a true, full orientation.

Pink - Panties, bloomers, or lingerie?

this question makes me think this quiz was made with feminine identities in mind.

Rope - Do you have a fetish?

i dont know?? not that i know of

also “Rope” DSKVLHJSK

Tobacco - Do you smoke?

ew nah

Wine - Do you drink?

sometimes, not often at all though. when i do, captain morgan and coke 👌

Whisky - Do you drink alone or socially?

i prefer to drink alone, or at least not out in public, cos the people i’m with usually try to persuade me to drink more than i’m comfortable with.

Poison - Do you have an addiction?

video games, and since i started working, i’ve also been spending a bit more on said games than i mean to. it’s killing my car savings a bit.

Taboo - Do you have any tattoos?

nope, don’t ever plan to. don’t see the use in it

Metal - Do you have any piercings?

see above

Stitches - What kind of clothing do you wear?

i used to wear a lot of collared shirts and clean, dark blue jeans cos i liked looking professional-ish, but i got over that and just wear a lot of t-shirts now

Eau de toilette - What is you favorite scent?

anything baking honestly

Murmur - How do you deal with drama?

if it’s my place to resolve it and i feel that i could, i try to, otherwise i avoid it cos i dont need more of that shit in my life.

Hiccup - What makes you nervous?

more than anything? people giving me weird looks or making sarcastic comments. it always sets off my “WHY DID THEY LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT/SAY THAT TO ME WHAT ARE THEY THINKING ABOUT ME DO THEY HATE ME DID I DO SOMETHING TO THEM OH MY GOD” alarms

Gazelle - Do you participate in the arts?

nop. rarely i open photoshop and Shitpost™ but thats about the extent of it

Anomaly - What do you find unique about yourself?

who knows??? maybe other people see something but i sure dont

Cedar - What is your favorite season?

i like the more mild seasons, like spring before it gets too balls hot and buggy, or autumn before it gets too fucking cold

Balm - Who was the last person you kissed?

probably my dog because i LOVE her, other than that probs my mom

#thanat0ast #sorry this took like 4 hours i got sidetracked #long post

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