#Also I had a sore throat by the end of work Monday but it was gone yesterday and now it's back and I'm worried I have COVID AGAIN and that

[wanderingandfound]

After having a lot of trouble falling asleep, then a lot of trouble staying asleep, I have woken up earlier than I would like with a sore throat and a worryingly precarious mental state for first thing in the morning.

#Usually I'm alright seeing posts about environmentalism and animal and worker cruelty in the agricultural industry and the effects #representation in fiction have on real people and the Hayes Code and genocide and when it all starts getting to me that's a sign I should #go to bed. But uh. I just woke up and immediately started feeling puny and terrible after the first serious post I saw. #So. #Also I had a sore throat by the end of work Monday but it was gone yesterday and now it's back and I'm worried I have COVID AGAIN and that #I've brought it into my grandma's house. #personal #learning to function

[steddiebang]

i sing the blues and you swallow them too

Author: @notesappwitch l Artist: @cuips-not-cute Posting on Monday, October 9

Eddie and his bandmates have been traveling from town to town, tavern to tavern, trying to make ends meet for who knows how long. Travelling and playing music for mostly uncaring people isn't the way any of them want to live, but it's their lot in life. Nothing about Hawkins is different from any other town they’ve been to, except one very handsome lord who keeps making eyes at Eddie across the tavern, and also the giant monster that's apparently plaguing the village and ripping holes in their dimension and doing its best to kill them and everyone else. Luckily for Eddie, the very handsome lord also has a slew of teenage adventurers, an ex with great aim, and a best friend that can turn into a wolf. There’s never an easy way into the (literal) lap of luxury, but despite it all, Eddie will get himself there one way or another, and maybe awaken something about himself in the process.

Keep reading for a sneak preview!

They make eye contact for a split second. The guy’s eyebrows go up— he’s saying something to the girl, mouth up turned slightly, but he doesn’t break Eddie’s stare. His arms are slung wide, elbows back on the bar, the muscle of his neck cutting a line from his ear to his collarbone. The look he hits Eddie with —open body language, lopsided grin, several calculated seconds of eye contact before looking back to his friend— screams I-am-a-seasoned,-well-practiced-flirt. 

And maybe that’s just okay with Eddie. He’s sick of doing all the work—

He has to pause his thoughts briefly to get out a particularly tricky bit of lyrics. Closing his eyes, he lets his mouth make the familiar shapes, focusing on the words falling out of his mouth, thorn rhymes with scorn,  and he has to line up his fingers just right to nail this chord,  and hope rhymes with slope and he has to be careful not to let his voice get too high and crack, and then its back into the chorus, catching his breath between a line. 

And when he’s opened his eyes again, scanning the crowd, he gets another glimpse of the guy, except this time his guard is down, eyes wide, mouth half open, just staring at Eddie like he just did something incredible. And yeah maybe Eddie did just sing a little louder and a little more clearly than he had been, but surely that can’t be all it takes to impress this guy. 

The moment passes as a group of people migrate between Eddie’s line of sight, and he’s shaken from his daydreaming. They’re at least making a decent amount of coin tonight, especially now as the slightly younger crowd moves through the building. When the sea of bodies parts again, the guy has turned to face the bar, and so Eddie turns and faces the music. 

He’s hoarse by the end of the evening, but it was a calculated gamble. He would think about stopping, another few coins would come, and they would push through one more song. But he’s got to save his voice for the next evening, and so as a large group of patrons leave, they start to wrap up. He’s stiff as he unravels himself from around his lute, ass numb and fingers sore. 

“I’m gonna go get more drinks and ask about a room,” Gareth says, slipping his drum back into his pack as he stands. 

Freak wordlessly pulls his pipe from his pocket and gestures it towards Eddie. “Don’t mind if I do,” Jeff accepts it instead, snatching it away to sniff the tobacco inside. Eddie waves them off noncommittally, clearing his throat in lieu of an answer. His bandmates disappear, leaving Eddie behind at the table in relative silence for a moment. 

They pulled in fifty-something coins for a few hours which, all things considered, could be worse. Now they just had to hope that their luck stayed for a few nights and their act didn’t become stale. Eddie takes a moment to inspect his lute before packing it away, checking the strings and running a hand over the wood looking for scratches. His fingers ache in an overfamiliar way, knuckles creaking as he slips the instrument back into its case. 

Gareth begins to make his way back to the table before abruptly changing his trajectory to go outside. It’s the only warning Eddie gets before someone swings themselves down into one of the chairs at his table. 

“You’re pretty good at that. How come I haven’t seen you around here before?”

The guy is surprisingly better looking up close, which cannot be said for most guys. His nose is big and his eyes crinkle at the corners and his hair must be full of some sort of magic to sit like that without being crunchy. 

Eddie blinks at him for a second before he finds himself, simply because human interaction is never really his strong suit. Performing is one thing and conversation another entirely. 

“We’re just passing through.” Eddie’s voice is hoarse from singing. “Can’t stay anywhere too long or they’ll get bored of you eventually.” 

“It would take me quite a while, I think.” He grins, wide and lopsided, and honestly how is this guy single enough to talk to him? 

Eddie deflects, not sure how to react to the full weight of his attention. “I didn’t catch your name.” 

“Steve,” he says plainly, throwing his hand out. His skin is so soft, confirming Eddie’s suspicion that this guy is rich, but his hand is also big, and warm, and Eddie has to remind himself to shake firmly. 

“I’m Eddie. Is it just Steve, or is there a title or honorific I need to know about?” 

That actually seems to offend Steve a bit, which is surprising given his type. Usually these noble-heir types love to boast about their future inheritances. “It’s technically Lord Harrington, but it just doesn’t have the same ring to it, I don’t think. And what about you, are you just Eddie?” He recovers easily from the slight, leaning back to sling an arm over the back of the chair and taking a long, pointed look up and down Eddie. 

Two can play at that game, and Eddie tips his head and looks up through his bangs when he replies, “You can call me whatever you want to, Steve.” 

And it’s really a shame that Steve doesn’t get to respond to that, because it was one of Eddie’s better flirts. But obviously, gods forbid Eddie try anything at all, lest the entire roof of the tavern cave in on them. 

The next several minutes are simultaneously a momentary blur and horrendous, gut wrenching slow motion. 

Read more on October 9!

#steddiebang23 #steddiebang23 upcoming projects

[fallingintoyourlilaceyes]

Can I request Xavier taking care of sick fem reader please

Here you go anon. I hope you enjoy <3

You look like someone ran you over

pairing: Xavier Thorpe x fem!reader

synopsis: You come down with a cold, so Xavier takes care of you.

warnings: none, literally just fluff

word count: 0.7k

You had felt it coming for days. Creeping up on you until had you in its clutch. The revenge for underestimating what a sick roommate could do to you and yet you couldn´t so anything to fight it off. Not all the tea and sleep in the world could have possibly helped to prevent the runny yet at the same time stuffy nose, the coughing and the resulting sore throat, it did nothing against the ache that spread throughout your whole body. What was worst of all though was the general feeling of sensitivity, physically and mentally. It was just the worst. You had made it your mission to get better over the weekend, but all the effort was to no avail. Come Monday morning you were feeling worse than ever. As a consequence of all the suffering you also didn´t answer your phone to any incoming texts or calls. Your friends knew you were sick anyway so who could possibly want anything from you.

Well despite all your friends knowing about the state your health was in at the moment, one person didn´t know and you neither showing up to the lessons you shared on Monday nor answering any of his messages worried him out of his mind to say the least. So in the afternoon Xavier made his way over to Ophelia hall to see if you were still alive. Knocking on the wooden door he heard shuffling and your weak voice cursing under your breath before you greeted him.

“What happened to you? You look like someone ran you over.”, he ignores your warning to better stay away from you right now and steps in the room.

“Thank you… Truly. Remind me to never take care of anyone sick ever again if I ever have that idea like ever.”, you pulled the blanket around your shoulders and over your head tighter when a shiver runs through your body.

“Will do. Now come on, you need to lay down again.”

“I´m sorry I didn´t answer my phone. I just couldn´t bring myself to.”

“No need to apologize. I no you are alright now. Well relatively.”, that stupid half smile on his lips makes a small smile spread on your face too. “Now you´ll stay here and don´t move. I´ll be back soon.”

Xavier pulled another blanket over your shivering figure, before he stands  up to leave. What was his plan now?

As it turned out you wouldn´t need to ask yourself that for long. In record time he made his way to wherever he was going and back to you. This time it was your roomie who opened the door to him as he made his way over to put all the stuff he brought on the little bedside table, almost knocking the cup of tea over with the plastic bag.

“What is all that?”

“First of all tea with honey.”, he hands you the warm cup. “And then about all the pain killers I could find.”

You take all the pills he gives you and set the now almost empty cup aside. He even stays with you until you fall asleep from the medicine working, overhearing the weak protest as he gets into bed with you skillfully.

That´s all you do in the following week. Drink tea, sleep and occasionally protest your loving boyfriend spending too much time around you. You were convinced he was gonna get infected next, but whatever you said fell on deaf ears.

Secretly you were a little glad about it. Cuddling Xavier always helped you feel better. There was just something about being spooned by him, his arms wrapped so tightly around you… All of it had you back on your legs by the end of the week.

Your nurse however couldn´t say as much. Just like you had predicted Xavier now was the one coming down with the worst case of a cold you had seen him suffer from ever since you gotten to know him. Of course you nursed him back to health like he had done with you, but not without giving him a little shit, because “I told you so, Xavi. Now drink your tea and stop whining.”

#xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe x you #xavier thorpe oneshot #wednesday netflix #wednesday netflix one shot

[followthebluebell]

alright so i finally tested positive for covid tonight.  i’m not terribly surprised.  it was bound to happen eventually.  to the best of my recollection, here’s the progression:

Sunday, 12/25 - started to feel ill.  It started as a mild sore throat.  Like I thought I had just talked too much that day.  It didn’t feel like a sick sore throat, just over-used. 

Medication: None

Monday, 12/26 - definitely sickish.  Throat wasn’t aching anymore.  I described it as ‘it's gone from that sharp pain that arcs up with every swallow and into a dull, damp, tightness where it feels full of phlegm’.  Sniffly by afternoon.  VERY difficult to moderate my temperature. 

In the morning, I felt far too hot, despite the very cool weather---- I ended up taking two ibuprofen to get my temperature down.  By afternoon, I felt freezing, but was sweating through layers of clothing at the same time.   I was having trouble walking from place to place without chattering my teeth.  By this point, I was pretty sure it was covid because it felt very similar to my booster responses.

Brain fog was moderate, but noticeable.

Home covid test negative

SEVERE difficulty sleeping.  I was waking up every hour soaked through with sweat.  

Medication: Ibuprofen

Tuesday, 12/27 - Very tired :( Pretty severe brain fog throughout the day too.  I was very sniffly and coughing severely.  I couldn’t even play with Truffle--- thankfully, he’s a good dog and can deal with a day of boredom as long as he gets some snackie toys. 

Lack of appetite was noticeable by this point.  I’m unsure when it started because I don’t have a proper appetite to begin with. 

I had severe problems keeping track of events.  I wanted to take a shower, right?  In order to do that, I have to turn on the hot water and then walk to my bathroom.  It takes about fifteen seconds to get from the hot water to the bathroom.  In that fifteen seconds, I’ll have forgotten whether or not I turned on the hot water.  i relied pretty heavily on Truffle to keep track of things.  I frequently forgot what I had just said to friends or assumed I’d said something already. 

Continued to wake up every 1-3 hours soaked with sweat. 

Medication: Ibuprofen, Nyquil

Wednesday, 12/28 - Probably the worst day of it physically.  My cough was the most severe by this point.  I was also sneezing a lot more.  The shivering continued throughout the day.  I still couldn’t really get from room to room without shaking. 

But I was able to keep track of events slightly better, at least.  My sore throat was mostly better and I didn’t have a fever for the most part.  I continued to sleep poorly and woke every few hours, still covered in sweat. 

I called into work to let them know I’d be out sick on thursday.

Medication: Ibuprofen, Nyquil

Thursday, 12/29 -  Felt a bit better!  I was able to play with Truffle again for about thirty minutes in the morning.  I no longer felt as shivery or Off all the time.  I was still very tired since I couldn’t really sleep the night before.

Still very sneezy throughout the day and my cough was pretty bad. 

I tried to nap throughout the day but wasn’t able to fall asleep.  It was just kind of one of those weird half-awake/half-asleep deals.  Still, I felt well enough to feel like I could go into work on Friday as long as I masked up, disinfected everything I touched, and stayed on heavy cleaning projects without human or cat interaction.

Medication: Ibuprofen, Nyquil

Friday, 12/30 - (started log here) Slowly lost sense of taste and smell throughout the day, which was why I took another covid test.  My nose is still stuffy, but I’m not sneezing or coughing as much. 

Throat still feels weirdly tight.  It doesn’t hurt anymore.  It just feels like there’s something in the way.

Still a severe lack of appetite.  I’m sure the lack of taste/smell isn’t helping with that :/

I did NOT end up going into work, btw.  Some heavy trees in the road saw to that.  So uh.  Thanks, trees. 

Was able to sleep soundly through the night without waking up in sweats.

Covid test positive

Medications: Nyquil

Saturday, 12/31 - Have SOME sense of taste back in morning.  It’s very faint, but I can distinguish sweetness a little bit.  No smell, though, which is unfortunate.  Had enough energy to play fetch with the dog for about forty minutes. 

By late afternoon, I could distinguish a few more tastes.  I wouldn’t say I can taste flavors.  It’s more like I can taste flavor PROFILES.  I can taste salty, sweet, and fat.  I can’t really break down a flavor more than that.  Still no sense of smell. 

Brain fog was pretty severe, but less memory-based.  It’s more like I just couldn’t focus on any one thing throughout the day.  I’d find myself trying to watch a video, listen to a podcast/audiobook, AND read a post all at the same time, without really realizing what was going on.  It was like I was trying to do something--- literally anything--- to get my mind’s attention. 

Coughing and sniffles are mostly gone, but still happens occasionally.  My breath capacity feels very limited.  I can’t stand for long periods without feeling tired.  My feet feel ‘absent’ when i sit down.  I know they’re there.  It’s not like they’re tingling or anything.  It’s just that, after a while, they stop registering.  Like I can’t really feel things pushing against my toes or something.  That’s the best way I can put it. 

Temperature seems well under control with the exception of my fingers getting very cold and stiff very quickly. 

I made bread. 

Medications: Nyquil

Sunday, 1/1/23 - very tired :( Played with Truffle for forty minutes, but I still don’t have the energy to brush him out or groom him.  When this is all over, I’ll have to give him a 7 all over, and that sucks because I’ve been growing out his fluff. 

Still no sense of smell, and my sense of taste is still pretty faint.  It seems stronger, but flavors still fade away pretty quickly. 

My appetite was still fairly poor throughout the day.  It’s strange.  I don’t have a very strong hunger drive when I’m healthy, but I suffer the affects if I don’t eat.  Like I get hangry, blood sugar crashes, etc.  Except right now, none of that happens.  I still feel the exact same.  Thankfully, Truffle is still doing his job and monitoring my blood sugar. 

My circulation seems better.  My fingers no longer get icy cold. 

My breathing is still constrained.  I thought it would feel like I can’t get enough air in my lungs on each breath.  Instead, it feels like there’s just something around my throat.  It constantly feels like my shirtcollar is too tight. 

Truffle is going to run out of his favorite food tomorrow morning.  He’ll have to make due with kibble for a few days, I guess. 

Medications: None

Monday, 1/2/23 - still very tired :( But my sense of smell is trying to make a come-back.  It just kinda came and went.  Like I’d open a can of cat food and THAT definitely smelled, but suddenly it was gone.  My sense of taste is recovering a bit too.  It’s still definitely fainter than it should be and certain things taste Off.

Coughing more today than yesterday, and my nose is runnier. 

Severe insomnia :( not helped by the fact that i’ve run out of melatonin.  I’m almost out of nyquil too.  I’ve got one more dose left, so I’m saving it. 

Medications: none

Tuesday, 1/3/23 - I took a 15 minute walk today with Truffle and felt like I walked three miles.  Breathing is still difficult.  Again, it’s not like my lungs aren’t filling or something.  It’s just this constant pressure on my throat.  My sense of taste is still faint, sense of smell is even fainter.  My nose is still runny and phlegmy.  I should have some more cough drops and nyquil in the mail right now.  It’s just a matter of getting down to the box and grabbing it.

Truffle ran out of his lamb food today but he’s taken to his kibble well enough.  Good thing too.  >>  Most of the town is flooded right now, and a lot of people are evacuated.  So uh even if I wasn’t sick, a trip to town would be out of the question right now. 

I shaved Truffle’s paws today so now he’s got clean feet again. 

Medications: Nyquil

Wednesday, 1/4/23 - More or less the same.  Truffle is still convinced I’m secretly hiding all the REALLY good food from him.  My sense of smell is still pretty much gone.  I can smell things if they’re RIGHT up against my nose, otherwise there’s nothing. 

Medications: Nyquil

Thursday, 1/5/23 - Took a covid test today and it was negative, so I should be good to work again soon.  The plan is to go back on Saturday and mostly just stick to non-human/animal tasks. 

#covid #will update this #anyway i've got the next few days off so we'll see how far into skyrim i get

[murkyhazed]

in case you were wondering where i've been, basically dead! on sunday night i got a fever, though i didn't check my temp until monday afternoon when i went home for lunch. i'd been feeling super nauseous and no appetite, and it was getting really bad so i ended up going home from work like right after i came back from lunch. i stayed in bed the rest of monday, and tuesday i had a higher fever (though still not emergency worthy) and had a bit of a sore throat and still nausea. i also had a headache, and that headache developed into a severe one on wednesday, like one i hadn't felt before. it was pounding, i couldn't move my eyes, i couldn't bend down, i was dizzy. wednesday evening i went to the hospital for the headache because it was so intense. pain relievers had not been working until that point. they gave me toradol and IV, but it also did absolutely nothing. not wanting to stay i went home. thursday morning it was even worse, and i went back to the hospital. they did the same thing, which AGAIN didn't work. i insisted on a scan, at least for peace of mind. everything was clear, like i generally appeared to be in remarkable health. i didn't feel remarkable though. the headache was pounding behind my eyes, i could barely move my head. but i was sent home without even some strong pain relievers to try and help. you would think the least they could've done was give me a few because of how excruciating it was?

my mom ended up texting my auntie to get some of her pain killers. she's on tylenol 4s because of her knee, i'm not sure if lifelong or not. anyway, i took one and low and behold... it worked? like, it helped me to where i didn't feel like sobbing. i alternated between advil and tylenol the rest of the day and was okay.

today, my headache is not nearly as severe. i can still feel it in the sides of my temple, but it's nothing like it was. anyway, that's what went on with me this week. hopefully i can stay alive and finally be on the mend from whatever this is.

i still think they could've done more for me at emerg by giving me some stronger painkillers to take home instead of having to make a dr/ug deal with my auntie xD

#* &. ooc.

[larabiatasstuff]

Hey bestie 🤗 please can I make a request for CK Terry Silver? As you know I'm not feeling very well, and I would really like to read something where Terry is looking after me. It doesn't necessarily need me to be all better at the end, I'd just really like some caring Terry. Take all the time you need bestie, I love you 💚💚💚

Of course you get caring Terry Bestie 🖤 I hope you're feeling better soon 🙏Sending much love and healing hugs🤗

It started on Monday with a coworker calling in sick saying that he had the flu. I still felt good so I shrugged it off but Wednesday morning I woke up to my whole body aching,my throat was sore and I had a pulsating headache. I tried to get up but the pain in my body sent me straight back to the mattress. "Good morning sweetheart, oh hey are you okay my love? You look pale." Terry said sitting on the edge of the bed touching my forehead. "I'm feeling terrible Terry. Everything hurts, my mouth is dry and my throat is sore." "And it seems you have fever sweetheart. Alright I won't go to work today, I'm taking care of you." "But Terry..." I started but he didn't let me finish. "No buts my love. I'm not going to let you suffer by yourself. Try to relax a little I'm getting some painkillers and tea for you." with that he got up closed the curtains and left the room. The darkness was a blessing to my eyes and I managed to drift off. I don't know how much time went by but I woke up to Terry putting a tray on my nightstand." I'm sorry my love did I wake you? " I gave him a tired smile "It's alright I didn't sleep very deep." "Can you sit up sweetheart? I brought you some painkillers. Wait come here I help you my love." he carefully helped me sit up handed me the painkillers and held the glass to my lips so I could drink. "Alright, do you need another pillow my love? Or a blanket?" "A blanket would be nice I'm freezing." Terry immediately went to the wardrobe and got one of my favorite fluffy blankets, he pulled the other blanket away, wrapped me into the fluffy blanket and put the other blanket on top of me. "Is it better?" "Yes Terry thank you so much." "I do anything to make you feel better sweetheart. Just tell me what you need." Terry said gently stroking my hair. "Could you maybe hold me for a while? I need to feel you Terry I'm not feeling myself and... and I hate being ill." I said and a few tears were running down my cheeks. "Don't cry my love it's alright, of course I hold you. As long as you need me okay?" he said wiping my tears away. Then he joined me in bed, put his arms around my body, his head resting on my shoulder. It felt like heaven to me and it didn't take long for me to fall asleep again. I didn't even realize that Terry left the bedroom just to make his famous chicken soup for me. He was just the sweetest man I could ever wish for. He made sure I had everything I needed, checked my temperature and held me when I felt sad again. He wouldn't let me get up by myself and was always by my side when I had to go to the bathroom or just wanted to sit up and watch TV with him. He also took the time to read from my favorite book to me and I was a hundred percent sure that I would feel much better soon. "Thank you so much honey I already feel a little better. I don't know what I would do without you. I love you so much." Terry gave me a warm smile, pulled me close to his body and kissed the top of my head. "I love you too sweetheart more than anything else."

#thomas ian griffith #sensei targaryen #terry silver #cobra kai #terry silver x reader

[sheliesshattered]

Dragon Con 2023 Retrospective

We've been home from Dragon Con for two weeks as of today -- but we've spent most of that time recovering from a particularly nasty Con Crud™. I tested negative for covid, but Jack tested positive and we had the same symptoms, so eh I figure I finally actually caught it, after several rounds of head colds that tested negative.

I always get some level of Con Crud and/or spoonie post-event exhaustion, so I was prepared to feel pretty awful for a week or two at least. The fever and sinus headache was a bit novel this year, but as I'm getting over this infection I'm actually feeling okay-ish. Hopefully my energy will continue to return over the next few weeks (I've got a big day of walking planned for the end of October!) but otherwise I might actually be feeling better now than I have two weeks post Dragon Con (or post Wasteland Weekend) in previous years.

And unlike previous years, I got through the whole con and the trip home without feeling sick at all. A little dehydrated at times (the wait for airport security at ATL was the worst honestly), and my body taking the trouble to remind me how much stretching in the evening helps me, but nothing worse than that.

I've had Dragon Cons in past years when I was too wiped out to even leave the hotel room by Sunday evening, but this year I spent Sunday evening standing around and socializing at the Doctor Who Ball, and didn't hate myself for it later. A combination of being in better physical condition now in general, and pacing myself (and Jack needing to pace too), and staying on top of vitamins and electrolytes and water all really seemed to help.

We got home on the Monday of Labor Day weekend, and then Tuesday morning I was feeling well enough to go grocery shopping on my own and make corn chowder from scratch when I got back. I was tired, but not too bad, honestly. Buuut by that evening I had a sore throat, then by Wednesday morning both Jack and I woke up with a fever. The rest of the week continued more or less like that, with a lot of lying around on the couch and watching movies and tv shows, lol.

Despite feeling like death, we did spend some time talking about what went well at Dragon Con 2023, what we'd want to do again and what we'd want to do differently. I really enjoyed the House of the Dragon photo meetup on Saturday, and wearing my Rhaenyra cosplay in general. I even ended up wishing that I'd carved out time to go to the Game of Thrones/ASOIAF photo meetup in the same costume, just to have more time in that dress and hanging out with that fandom.

There's something that I really enjoy about working hard for months on end to make something screen-accurate from a fandom that is active but also fairly focused. I recognized every costume worn at the HotD meetup, knew which character wore it in which episode, etc. Everyone I talked with at that meetup knew exactly which dress I was wearing, which character I was, and noticed the details I spent so much time working on -- just as I did theirs. There's a wonderful camaraderie and bonding in appreciating each other's hard work to achieve screen accurate reproductions of well-known and visually compelling costumes.

Between that meetup and late night drinking shenanigans while wearing my Rhaenyra cosplay, I really felt like I achieved my peak Dragon Con experience this year while wearing that costume.

By contrast, while I did have fun wearing my Harley Quinn Taylor Swift mashup cosplay, I didn't have nearly as much fun as I did as Rhaenyra. I got some nice compliments from complete strangers who saw the shirt and got the mashup concept, and I had one funny in-character interaction with a Joker cosplayer, but by the evening I was ready to switch back to being Rhaenyra.

The Harley mashup was clever, but not people-stopping-to-take-pictures clever, and honestly there are just a lot of Harleys running around the con. And her canon is a lot more scattered than HotD/GoT canon, and costumes are much more commercially available, so there wasn't nearly the same level of bonding over hand-making the costumes.

The Swifties meetup was fun, and exchanging the beaded friendship bracelets I made was a good experience -- but honestly I had more fun handing out the few Rhaenyra ones I made than I did exchanging the Swiftie ones. I don't regret making the Harley Quinn Taylor Swift mashup, but it did really help clarify my priorities for future Dragon Cons.

So Harley Quinn was fun, but won't be repeated, I don't think. But because I'd worn Rhaenyra's red dress so late into the evening on Friday, I hadn't had a chance to wear my punk!Rhaenyra original concept yet, so on Saturday night when I wanted to switch back to Rhaenyra for awhile, I got to break that one out for late night parties and shenanigans (and also Dairy Queen).

Sunday was lower-key by comparison. Quite a few Doctor Who cosplayers looked right at my Oswin and didn't seem to recognize it, which seems to be par for the course for mainstream Whovians when it comes to Clara's era. That said, just when I was starting to get snarky about that (quietly, only to Jack), a Sixth Doctor cosplayer complimented my Oswin, which made the whole thing feel worth it.

And then when I switched to my MOTOE Clara cosplay for the evening hours, there were a few more people who clearly recognized the costume -- including one woman who gasped and yelled 'Clara!!' at me as we were passing each other in heavy Marriott crowds. I didn't get a chance to do more than gasp in surprise at her excitement, but the cycling of the Marriott crowd being what it is, we eventually passed each other again, and I ran off through the crowd to catch her that time. We chatted for a bit and I gave her the beaded bracelet reading 'Don't Stop Me Now' that I made for exactly that situation, lol. We ended up hanging out at the Doctor Who Ball, but her excitement over the MOTOE cosplay really made my night.

The Doctor Who Ball had a costume contest (that wasn't real well organized, but sounds like it will be a more official thing in future years, because it was such a popular event) that I entered on a lark. The announcement of the winners in particular wasn't well done, I missed it completely because I was talking with people, but I went and asked afterwards and found out that I'd done well and (according to the woman running the contest, who immediately asked to take a picture with me) apparently I only lost the Companion category to a Wilf cosplayer who was spot-on, and tugging on everyone's heartstrings. I don't know how close the vote really was, but her enthusiasm for my cosplay felt like such a gift.

I haven't felt like going to GallifreyOne in recent years, since I've felt so much on the outside of the Doctor Who fandom (between the hate focused on Clara's era and my own dislike of the most recent era), but the Doctor Who Ball was a great time to talk with like-minded Whovians, and to remember why I love this corner of the fandom in general.

I think MOTOE Clara will probably make an appearance at future Dragon Cons, and Oswin met the original purpose of being a comfortable easy-to-wear cosplay for during the day, so in all likelihood that one will come back too (after just a little bit of repair work on the belt).

The red silk Rhaenyra gown held up well, much better than I feared it would. I maaay need to handwash it, but I washed the fabric with shampoo before I sewed it, so theoretically it can be handwashed again, if it really needs it. I need to replace the shoes, but that's already in progress. At this point I'm planning to bring Rhaenyra's Red Dress back to Dragon Con 2024 (and maybe even to something else in between, like Wonder Con?). Quite possibly punk!Rhaenyra too.

I think season 2 of HotD will air before next Dragon Con, or at least start before the end of August. There's every possibility that there will be new costumes from s2 that I'll want to make -- but either way, I know now that I want to lean into cosplay from fandoms like HotD/GoT, and focus less on fandoms like Harley Quinn.

I've already started thinking about and planning cosplays for next year, but this is already way too long, so I'll post an update about that tomorrow...

#Dragon Con #Dragon Con 2023 #my cosplay #my sewing #RRD cosplay #Harley Quinn Swiftie cosplay #Oswin Oswald cosplay #Clara Oswald cosplay #House of the Dragon cosplay #Rhaenyra Targaryen cosplay #Harley Quinn cosplay #Doctor Who cosplay #long post #my costumes #2023 mood

[kcowgill]

Not doing well physically at the moment.

Sure I ran (mostly) 5 miles Sunday. Was it Sunday? No, Monday!

I also snapped up an offer from my work’s insurance who’s partnering with a company called “Hinge Health” - digital/virtual PT. They sent me a tablet, some wearables, and an exercise plan. Hooked me up with a personal coach. Had been doing their exercises every day (night, really) for the last week or so.

Until last night.

Tuesday I woke up with my back angry at me. Reminded me of my old sciatica days (which was later re-“diagnosed” by a PT I was seeing at the time as hip imbalance/rotation). Still did my Hinge Health routine at the end of the day. Wednesday I was in WAY worse shape. Couldn’t go from sit-stand or stand-sit without pain, sometimes SUPER sharp. Sometimes enough to make me fold my legs. Couldn’t cough or sneeze (hello spring allergies (I guess?)) without pain so sharp I cried out. Skipped Hinge Health. Wondering if my coach will yell at me today.

Today it’s better but not as good as Tuesday. Oh and also is that a bit of a sore throat I feel coming on?

Getting really tired of one to two steps forward, two to three steps back with this meat sack I’m walking around in.

Anyhow what did it? Did I run too much too soon? Hinge exercises actually harder than they seem (which they seem SUPER easy, so...)? Or just old age? Or other?

#healthblr #fitblr?

[fiftytwotwentythree]

Wellness Wednesday:

From Good to Worst

This week started off with a bang:

PTO Thursday/Friday from work

Saw Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (an Effing Aweome Installment)

Got a Massage (bad but still pretty good)

Hung out with my Bestie

Picked out Patio Furniture (yeah, I'm at that stage of adulting, NBD)

Played Board Games

Had choice BBQ in the backyard

Just a good, solid weekend...

But then I woke up Monday and couldn't talk - throat burned.

The sore throat alleviated but then my nose started acting up - Can't breathe worth a lick, and to top it off went back to work to an onslaught of tasks and BS.

Also - another moment to add onto my No Good, Horrible, Very Bad Day... I bought a batch of Oranges...

They taste like Cantaloupe!

Do you know what kind of mind eff that is?

I should just move to Australia.

JK - first world problems.

.

.

19th CHECK-IN:

Current Goals:

Lose 52 lbs

Completed as of 4/12/2023

New Goal: Maintain or Continue on The Weight Loss Path

Avoid "Junk Food"

Minimize Take-Out / Fast Food Consumption

Short Term:

Vegetarian-ish Diet: Completed

End Date: 4/09/2023 - 46 Days Total

.

.

Meal Tracker:

THURSDAY

Lunch:

Roast Beef and Pastrami Sandwich on a Toasted Wheat Hoagie with Provolone Cheese

- Miracle Whip

- Dijon Mustard

Handful of Good & Gather's Tex Mex Trail Mix

Snack:

(2) Handfuls of Sahale Snacks Pomegranate Vanilla Flavored Cashews Glazed Mix

(2) Handfuls of Sahale Snacks Pomegranate Flavored Pistachios Glazed Mix

Supper:

Annie Chun's Sweet Chili Noodle Bowl

- Cashews

Birds Eye Loaded Cauliflower Bites

- Polynesian Sauce

- Ranch

FRIDAY

Lunch:

Roast Beef and Pastrami Sandwich on a Toasted Wheat Hoagie with Melted White American Cheese

(3) Handfuls of Good & Gather's Tex Mex Trail Mix

Supper:

Bowl of Progresso Italian Sausage & Potato Soup

- 8 Crackers

(2) Johnsonville Beddar with Cheddar Smoked Sausages on Toasted Hotdog Buns

- Ketchup

Bag of Giant's Shelled Sour & Onion Pistachios (2.5 Servings)

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

SATURDAY

Lunch:

(2) Corn Beef and White American Cheese Sandwiches on Toasted Bread

Bowl of Wonderful's Shelled Sweet Chili Pistachios

Snack:

(2) Bowls of Wonderful's Shelled Sweet Chili Pistachios

Supper:

(2) Johnsonville Beddar with Cheddar Smoked Sausages on Toasted Hotdog Buns

Bowl of Progresso Lasagna Style Soup

- 6 Crackers

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

SUNDAY

Lunch:

Santa Fe Style Salad

(1) Medium Orange

Snack:

BBQ Corn Nuts

Supper:

(1) Grilled Chicken Breast

(1) Pineapple Brat on Bun

- Ketchup

- Mustard

- Relish

(1) Chipotle Pepper Jack Brat on a Bun

- Ketchup

- Scoop of Cottage Cheese

(1) Cheeseburger on a Bun

- Ketchup

- Scoop of Cottage Cheese

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

MONDAY

Lunch:

Spinach Dijon Salad

Snack:

(2) Handfuls of Good & Gather's Tex Mex Trail Mix

Supper:

Bowl of Buffalo Ranch Salad

(1) Medium Orange

TUESDAY

Lunch:

Spinach Dijon Salad

Supper:

Chef Salad

(1) Medium Orange

WEDNESDAY

Lunch:

(2) Leftover Beer Brats on Sesame Seed Hotdog Buns

- Ketchup

- Relish

- Cottage Cheese

(2) Scoops of Potato Salad

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

Supper:

Cheeseburger off the Grill

- Ketchup

- Lettuce

- Cottage Cheese

Side of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese

An Ear of Firecracker Corn off the Grill

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

.

.

Workouts:

THURSDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(5 mins) Planks [ 5 sets of 1 min]

FRIDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [10 sets of 10]

SATURDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(5 mins) Planks [ 5 sets of 1 min]

SUNDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 sets of 20]

MONDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(5 mins) Planks [ 5 sets of 1 min]

TUESDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [5 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 sets of 20]

WEDNESDAY

(200) Jumping Jacks [4 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges[4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Assisted Push-Ups [2 sets of 50]

(50) Reverse Leg Lifts [5 sets of 10]

(50) Leg Kickbacks [5 sets of 10]

(5 mins) Planks [ 5 sets of 1 min]

.

.

WEIGHT TRACKER:

Starting Weight (Noon, 1/01/2023): XXX.X lbs

Weight at Last Check-In, 5/03/2023: -1.6 lbs

Weight As of Noon, 5/10/2023: -1.6 lbs

Total Weight Loss: -60.4 lbs

.

.

Closing Thoughts:

The Good:

Broke 60 lbs... thinking about rewarding myself... surfing Amazon now.

Sit-Ups and Planks dont bother/burn as much as they did starting May 1st.

The Bad:

Can't breathe out my nose and battling a sore throat for the last 2 days.

The Ugly:

My sleep schedule is whack.

#52 in 23

[campingwiththecharmings]

.

so i have seasonal allergies. i've had them since i was like 14 years old, taking meds for them, whatever. no big deal. so monday, i had a sore throat, thought it was just my allergies, so i didn't really do anything about it. tuesday, the sore throat's gone, but i'm congested af, so congested my ears, jaw, and teeth hurt and i can't really hear well out of my ears. i assume this is a combo of my regular allergies (bc i usually have a little congestion even after i take my meds) and a cold since it literally happened overnight. now, i have a history of my congestion backing up into my ears and causing ear infections, it's happened several times. to prevent this, i decided to make an appointment at my local urgent care. i had to work tuesday night so i scheduled it for the following day at like 5 p.m. i was a little better yesterday, tho still more congested than usual, but my ears still kind of hurt so i decided to keep my appointment. i get there at 5 p.m. and end up having to wait until almost 5:30 to get called back; apparently they were short staffed. like, okay fine, understandable. so the nurse does the check in and does tests for the flu and covid to rule them out, and i then sit in the room for almost a fucking HOUR waiting for the doctor. at this point, if i hadn't already paid my co-pay, i would've just said fuck it and left. so the doctor finally comes in and i explain why i'm there. he checks my ears and is all 'oh yeah, there's def congestion and pressure!' like, no shit, sherlock. then he checks a few other things and proceeds to tell me that, since my flu and covid tests were negative, it's just my allergies. like, sir, no. it's definitely not JUST my allergies. they might be a contributing factor, sure, but they are not the sole cause. i try to tell him this respectfully, like well, my allergies are usually pretty bad but not this bad, and they don't usually get this bad in one fucking day. he says, 'oh well, allergies are really bad right now' (bro, y'all say this every fucking season like stfu). now, i just want to make sure i'm not going to get a fucking ear infection okay? like, i don't want to have to come back there bc this fucker decided it was just my allergies so i'm like 'okay well, what should i do? bc like you said, there's pressure and congestion and i don't want another ear infection.' so he prescribes an allergy med i've taken a few times before that kinda works and says that i should take it and also use a nasal spray (which i already do). then he's like 'okay byeeee' and leaves. so i paid $50 and waited an hour an a half for this mfer to try to tell me that this cold is just allergies. lol fuck off sir, idc that you have a medical degree, i know my body and this is not just fucking allergies. 🙄 *pops another dayquil*

that is all, tysm.

#venting about my doctor's appointment yesterday lol #it's nothing huge it's just that this doctor just annoyed the fuck out of me sorry #had to bitch about it somewhere #feel free to ignore

[fluffybunnybadass]

testing pos for covid yesterday feels so surreal bc i SWEAR i have just a cold. not even like, in a denial way. just... in a fortunate way. every time i have to do those symptom screenings, i only say yes to like. 2-3 symptoms that can be part of like, literally anything else (cough/sneeze/congestion/ previously sore throat). and my body doesn't do the whammy of everything, just, like, one symptom a day shit. hell, i've been sick/symptomatic for like... 4 days (5 now i guess as of today) and like. fortunately no major, scary symptoms.

but i did two at home tests in case one was a false pos, and nope, stupid work done got me by putting me in a self checkout station now 8/

(the crowd does not go wild for this)

maaaaaaan, i'm so fucking pissed about that.

but fr tho, it doesn't compute. covid is this big scary life threatening illness sickness thing that causes life lasting damage and here i am, just like

cough harrumph achoo sniffle sniffle mouth breathing bc the fucking sinus pressure holy shit. the fucking punched-in-the-nose-by-sinus-pressure/issues and the fucking. one-sided throat irritation+ swelling at the beginning of the week (gone by end of next day) were like. the ONLY unusual cold symptoms for me. I barely even had a fever/unusual temps (1-2 degrees higher, if that).

I've literally been blessed with only getting cold-like symptoms thus far. and I hope to god that it stays that way. I'll have to get a "proper" test on monday, bc that's when the nearest testing cite is open for me (and bc sbux doesn't count home tests just yet 8) ), but at least it's walking distance so i don't have to worry about putting someone else at risk. or several someones, in the case of taking the bus.

.

seriously, i was more sick from food poisoning than this. my last cold at the beginning of the year was more sick. so, i'm just trying to assume good things, because it hasnt gotten worse, and would have by now, right?

if i just keep thinking of it like a cold and don't cause psychological damage to myself by thinking about it as covid (while maintaining my usual cautious safety standards anyways. because i've been masking this entire time and won't stop even after this), i should stay fine, right? i am just trying to keep myself from being psychosomatic ok. i have also struggled to remember that word ALL DAY today. my day also started at 2pm.

#covid mention #covid cw #health mention #medical cw #i'm mad but im also glad it's not worse #and yes it's absolutely what you think it is this time

[1d1195]

brothers are a whole other thing LMAO they’re crazy. they will literally call you the stupidest person they’ve met in their life but then buy u ur favorite ice cream at 2AM.

i always tell my sister that i’m so grateful i had her to help me grow up and that i get so sad when i realize she never had an older sister. her response is always that she never thought of it like that but she thinks she was made to be an older sister. i swear you guys are built different, not everyone can handle being an older sister and i have SO much appreciation for u all !!!

i promise you that your mom is 100% right. she probably ADORES you but just doesn’t wanna admit it bc youngest sibling pride yk ?😭 i refuse to believe otherwise bc i sincerely feel like you’re PERFECT sister material. dependent, funny, mature, so sooo kind.

new songs on rotation !! i’ve rlly been enjoying What I Am by zayn and Tejano Blue by cigarettes after sex

i hope you know all i can think about is Ding part 3 :) like omg it’s just been on my mind 24/7 and i can’t wait to read whatever you have. idk if you have this planned out yet, or not, but how many parts do you see this series being ??

I DID SLEEP HAHA i’ve been feeling off these past few days and i woke up SICK today🙁 it’s not too bad just a sore throat and a runny nose but i do hope it goes away soon because i have a friend’s engagement party to attend on the weekend (but im literally drinking a cold diet dr. pepper rn so i have no clue how i expect to feel better lol)

have the best day ever sam !!!

~🎶

That's so sweet about brothers 😭 I could have used that too growing up!

My sister and I sound WAY less mushy than you and your sister (no shade, just different relationships obviously) but that's so sweet! I can totally see where she's coming from I don't think I could be a younger sister. The vibe would be so off and you'd be able to tell I was not meant to be a younger sister hahahahahaha YOU'RE SO SWEET 😭😭 my sister calls me every day (even when I don't want her to because I have been girl-rotting all week on my vacation and have nothing to report) so I get annoyed with her pretty easily but I do enjoy talking to her. I wish she would put a little more effort into idk taking care of our parents? I don't live at home anymore so I feel like I'm still doing all the grunt kind of work that she could just do because she's AT HOME? but idk. she's a Drama Queen™ or maybe I am and I'm just being bossy 😂

I am putting the final touches on Ding part 3 so it's ready to go for Monday hehehehe I'm really excited about it! I think it will be my favorite part honestly. At least right now. I have it outlined for 7 parts right now! (I think i told someone 8 at one point but I did it in roman numerals and I'm dumb and can't read). But 7 is what I have right now. However it could change because I think parts 4 and 5 could end up being one part. I'm really not sure. Part of my outline for part 5 literally says "filler episode" so it's meant to be a next to nothing update.

UGH! I'm not sure where you're from but I live in New England and it's starting to be spring around here and I usually get a allergy-attack-turned-cold around now and I'm dreading it because it's SO unfair to be sick during the warmer weather. Maybe mix in some water with your Dr. Pepper hahahah Also! I truly believe cranberry juice has medicinal values. OOH I haven't listened to too much Zayn, tragic on my own part. I've heard clips of his new song Alienated though and I'm loving it! I've never heard of Tejano Blue, I will give that a listen as well!

I just made my Spring 2024 playlist--it's a lot of old stuff I've listened to in the past (don't listen to the Stuck on the Floor song I have at the bottom--it's for sad-girl hours hahahaha)

Hope you feel better!

xoxo

#🎶

[steamishot]

new year 2024

this holiday break was pretty fun, despite being sick for the majority of my time off. it was nice to have a big party that was constantly going, with all loved ones together.

i arrived back in LA on the 16th night at 10pm. my brother offered to pick me up because he had some coffee equipment he wanted to drop off at my parent's house. he was coughing in the car during the majority of the drive home. because it was like 2am EST by then and i just got off a long plane ride, my body was probably also weaker. i also thought i became "stronger" because i'm able to withstand the NYC cold so i didn't bundle up as much as i usually would - meaning, i was walking around with just a tshirt instead of sweater. i also went to their house again on monday to WFH before heading to pick my parents up at LAX, and my brother continued to cough a lot around me. anyway, i started feeling sick a week afterwards, coincidentally after my last work week. it started with having a sore throat that turned into a painful sore throat, then a full on cold with a LOT of coughing. i think it's the sickest i've been (minus covid) for the past 5-8 years and it lasted like a whole 8 days.

we spent christmas at my aunt's house. i was masked up with a sore throat, but wasn't feeling that bad yet. she cooked an amazing hot pot dinner. i gifted my cousins $25 each and wrote them a card. i was supposed to pick matt up from the airport that night (he was scheduled to arrive at 12:30am, but ended up arriving an hour earlier due to it being christmas/less crowds). he asked his brother to get him instead so i could rest.

that week, i progressively got worse. we were supposed to go to hot yoga and rescheduled it 3x, but ended up not going at all. on thursday, i went to LAX to pick up my auntie and uncle who were visiting from dallas. i was coughing basically the entire drive back. my aunt is a feisty/funny one with good fashion sense and her man is a white former policeman. we got khmer noodles in chinatown. i gave up my room for them to stay in. that night, i drove over to matt's place to sleep. his dad recently got a new tempurpedic mattress and duvet, and it's now like sleeping on a cloud (big upgrade from the previous spring mattress). his family gave me some antiobiotics and matt made me some hot lemon ginger tea.

friday morning, we were supposed to all head out to indio airbnb for a big family gathering (14ppl + baby). like our previous trip maybe 5 years ago, there was some drama about people not wanting to go or being on the fence about going. it was last minute that my grandma and uncle S decided to join. then even more last minute, uncle M decided to back out. then last last minute, uncle M decided to join again. so, we successfully got everyone out there lol. i was feeling really crappy this morning and almost didn't want to go. but i felt hopeful that taking antibiotics would help. we all met at my parent's house and departed from there - 3 cars total. the airbnb had 6 rooms and everyone got to sleep comfortably on a bed. there was a pool table, grill, jacuzzi/heated pool, and game room so everyone was pretty entertained. i was in and out of resting but it was really nice to have everyone around. the next morning, we took some fun group photos outside and it's a time i'll cherish forever. it's not easy to get the family together like this.

i spent that night and the next day at matt's again. with my family, it was about chilling and having fun. with his family, it's all about work/planning lol. his parents talked to me about planning a trip to japan, and also about a trip to vegas next week when matt's in town again. i let them know that japan is a bit far for us to fly out to from NYC (16 hours) and to wait until matt's job prospects are clearer. it would make sense to go once he has more than a week off at a time. for NYE dinner, we had bbq steak and skewers. i was still feeling sick but on the path to recovery by this time. that night, we retired early around 10pm because i had to drop matt off at LAX at 5am for an early flight back to NYC.

i spent more time with my aunt on her last days here. it took some time for us to warm up to each other, but it's always nice to spot some similarities within the family. she has a very feminine, aggressive strength that i admire. we went thrift shopping together and she helped pick out an elegant simple black helmut lang dress for me. i put on home alone 2 to watch together with her and my mom. i missed her after she left.

SS invited me to a classpass workout on 1/2 but we decided to reschedule for next time. even though we didn't get to meet, i appreciated the thought. i had the goal of running 2 miles multiple times a week and was successful up until the point where i got sick. i haven't done any workouts in the last 10 or so days. SZ will come over later for a baby workout.

therapy: i had my first video session with monica today. i felt a little awkward at first. she looked older than i thought she was (based off of her grad year, she's supposed to be around my age). i felt more closed off with the video on than on our previous phone call. i also noticed that i feel self conscious if i see her eyes looking elsewhere (thinking am i boring you, am i communicating well enough, are you listening, etc) and i share less when this happens. anyway, this session was OK. we had both come back from holiday mode. i had a generally great week and a half or so, so it didn't feel good to resurface my issues that i temporarily forgot about or to rehearse/explain them to someone else. it was like "here's reality again". or even worse, it felt like i was listing out all my problems, which takes even more effort for someone who doesn't already know me/my life. and also a bit more effort to explain the realities of a medical career. she asked a lot of questions, and had more questions after each of my answers without much feedback. i honestly felt worse after this session. i questioned if my issues are severe enough to warrant therapy or if it's more beneficial to chat with friends about it for support. anyway, i have another session with her next wednesday - we'll see how it goes. perhaps it's not a good fit, or this is just part of the process.

babysitting: my brother and SIL have been really really dependent upon my parents for babysitting. my SIL grew up rich and always had this mentality that she's the boss/can order other people around. she has a lot of tact so can get by with it. my parents (mostly dad) really missed my niece during their 3 week cruise, so they were happy to babysit her when they came back. the daycare was also closed for the holidays for a week. however, they're still really tired, from their own duties/chores, running businesses, entertaining visitors, meeting friends, etc. yesterday, my SIL received news that the daycare will be closed for the next two weeks due to personal issues - which means more work for my parents. though they are technically happy to babysit their grandbaby, it can also be extremely exhausting. my niece is also getting to be really spoiled because everyone dotes on her. today, my parents decided to start letting her be diaper-less. my dad spanked her for the first time ever twice today, like really hard, because she peed her pants after having the chance to pee on the toilet. he was only ever loving/doting/accommodating to her since she was born so it was shocking to finally see this discipline. i don't know how i feel about spanking.

[lilgraceandi]

A Trip and A Fever

Together with ma and Biow Huei, we visited Beck Sian Ah Jek and family in USJ because they’ve recently shifted to their new house. They’ve been inviting ma to visit for a long time and we finally went during the Deepavali weekend.

We had two sumptuous meals and tried a special Korean shaved ice. I think that’s what triggered Grace’s cough. I just didn’t think of giving her warm water then.

She started coughing on Sunday night (they day we came back). Then she had fever from Monday till today (Wednesday) off and on and a sore throat. In the end, we took her to the doctor today in the evening. Almost each time the panadol wore off, the fever would return.

The doctor prescribed antibiotics because of the sore throat and phlegm. Throughout the time she’s unwell, grace never once complained. I even let her go to school on Tuesday because I thought she would be ok. But today she stayed home. Tomorrow both Leslie and I are working so I’m hoping she will be well enough to go.

One thing I’ve discovered: Grace is very good at swallowing tablets. She didn’t have any problems swallowing 250mg of panadol each time. She also practised the piano and did some reading and math whenever she felt alright. But she slept more than 3 hours in the afternoon today of which I’m glad.

[racke7]

For nearly a month now, I've been ill.

The first week, it amounted to a slightly sore throat and a very mild cough. So then I went back to work the next monday, and had my sore throat become a bit more noticeable during the afternoon.

That tuesday, I spent the whole morning coughing, so I said "nah, I'm staying home today". But I had a thing to do on wednesday, and I didn't feel like shit anymore so off I went to work. And of course, on the drive home from the project, my voice violently imploded.

That thursday, my cough had moved from my upper throat, straight into somewhere in my lungs. So I said "fuck that, I'm staying home for the rest of the week".

The next monday, I was wary enough of everything that I just said fuck it and called in sick immediately. Then, during the afternoon, my stomach started to hurt a bit, but whatever. Then, at midnight, I woke up with my stomach-pain being worse, but I could still manage to go back to sleep so-... and then I woke up an hour later still in pain.

So, at 3am, I crawled out of bed and made my way to the ER (because it was pain vaguely similar and roughly in the same area as where my appendix had been hurting earlier this year). The ER said "we don't know what the fuck that is, but it isn't your appendix, and probably won't kill you, go home".

So I did, and got a time at the local clinic later in the day. But after waiting for nearly two hours, and with the promise that "waiting on the doctor" would mean "a lot more hours", I shrugged and went home after just a few tests and a new time with a physiotherapist who "might help" (the pain in my stomach hadn't stopped, but it wasn't that bad).

The pain in my stomach finally started to lessen at some point during wednesday. Not disappear, but lessen. Thursday was the physiotherapist time, and apparently my stomach-muscles are a bit out-of-phase with each other? Though considering how one of my sides had been in pain for going on 60+ hours at that time, I dunno if I entirely trust that assessment.

(Also, so far, the only assumption made seems to be that I'd "strained a muscle" in my stomach. Though how the hell I'd managed that without also getting "proximity pain" when he touched the attachment-points for my muscles, or how I'd managed to strain it from lying in bed? Not the most trustworthy of diagnosis, I feel.)

Regardless, I stayed home for friday too (stomach-pain was nearly gone, sore throat was still there).

Was planning on going back to work on monday, but realized two things late sunday evening: 1, my throat was still hurting; 2, the doctor wanted me to take a bunch of tests for a third thing (my spine, which keeps getting inflamed, and which they're now refusing to give me an extension for my pills for), and the clinic that I was supposed to take those tests at opened at 9 (job starts at 7, half an hour away). So I asked my boss, and he said "take that day off".

Was stuck in a waiting-room for a lot of hours for the sake of a five-minute thing, and then came back home. Throat had been a bit sore, but not really anything worthy of note, so tuesday here I come-...

I woke up on tuesday and coughed for three fucking hours straight.

Boss wasn't very happy ("you can still work if you just have a cough"), but fuck him, I stayed home. Felt a lot better on wednesday and went to work. Felt like I had a bit of a sore throat by the end of the day.

Woke up thursday and my cough was back in my lungs. And I coughed enough at one point that I came close enough to trigger a gag-reflex that I went "there's a bucket in the other room, I should bring it closer" before it died down.

Friday (today)? I stayed home, in part because I'm still fucking coughing, and in part because I'm also feeling a pain in my chest from coughing so hard yesterday. Also had a call with my doctor where she made a lot of awkward noises about me being home sick for a full month with "just a cough" (especially since apparently no infections or inflammations showed up in the blood-work), and "without a proper examination" (I get that you're massively understaffed, but like... you're the one who didn't care to check me for either my cough or my unknown source of stomach-pain).

So... feeling more than a bit frustrated at all of this bullshit about my physical health (and massively sleep-deprieved because I couldn't fall asleep last night) I sat down and revived my "cough-monitoring excel-sheet".

As in, the excel-sheet I made after a very persistent lingering cough after having caught the flue, right before covid hit (meaning that everyone said "cough? stay home").

Checking on that, I was coughing maybe 10-20 times a day early on (roughly around 1-cough/40-minutes), and 3-4 by the end of it.

I started recording my coughs today at 1pm, and my cough is most strong during the morning.

I'm up to 21 coughs. Roughly 1-cough/10-minutes.

... I dunno if this has been really bad today, or if that's actually mostly normal? Because if it's normal, then I should definitely fucking not be working.

#personal stuff #rants #health #my throat feels a bit like... i like singing you know? i sing along to everything. i PHYSICALLY REFUSE to sing. it's instinctively Bad. #that's where my voice/throat is at. and where it has been all this time. #but like fever? a ''general sickness feeling''? no? my throat just feels fucked. and i cough. #but like... during that first week? and during most weekends? it's almost nonexistent. just a... ''don't sing''-feeling #so i keep trying to figure out if ''is my symptom gone bcs i'm relaxed. or is it gone bcs i'm cured'' and i think it's stressing me out

[andrewbelindo]

COVID will fucking sneak up on ya...

Since 2020, I've been masking, social distancing, minimizing trips out, even quarantining from my partners if I so much as think I was exposed to someone with COVID.

Sunday, I had a virtual writing tutor appointment. I've just restarted T, which in the past has made me prone to pain in my vocal cords if I talk too much. And here I was, talking (loudly) for an hour straight about my book. In the middle of my appointment, I started noticing a mild sore throat, but I thought nothing of it. It was expected.

So Monday, when I woke up with a very sore throat, I thought it was a continuation from the day before. I'd overexerted my voice, after all. Happened all the time when I was on T before. Being a virtual tutor myself during the lockdowns, I'd talked myself rasp plenty of times, with many of those times ending in a panic attack because "WHAT IF IT'S COVID?!" So I was calm this time. "It's just from the tutoring session. Obviously. I haven't talked that much at one time since starting T." So I didn't isolate at home. The sore throat started to clear up Monday night, and Tuesday morning, I was almost back to normal. I went to work, avoiding using my voice as much as possible so it could rest, and by the end of the day Tuesday, I felt almost good as new.

Except then, my sinuses started to have a dull ache to them.

No sniffles. No stuffy nose. (Well, that I noticed, anyway.) Just this ACHE that means something in my snoot is swollen and angry.

So I took a COVID test to try to quell the panic attack that was bubbling in me. Unluckily, my tests were badly expired, so not even the control line showed up. But I was tired (a little weirdly so), so I decided to go to sleep and check in the morning with fresher tests.

After waking up with a faint headache and some intestinal anger, I went and took that new COVID test.

...Admittedly, I was not expecting it to be positive this morning. This was supposed to be part of my little ritual to turn off my anxiety. It's not actually supposed to have that little red line in the T section.

P A N I C

Thankfully, my gf calmed me down. The tests I took were still a year expired. They could be wrong. I don't feel sick. Voice exhaustion and anxiety (because my anxiety actually does affect my sinuses, which caused plenty of real fun anxiety spirals during past COVID scares) explain all my symptoms. We decided to both get COVID tests today (both our jobs hand them out free) and I'd retest after work.

At work, I felt great! Other than being tired, I felt 100% normal!

I came home, gathered my tests, and locked myself in a bathroom. But before I'd even finished setting up my second test, the first had a line for positive.

...not good.

15 minutes later confirmed it. Both tests were VERY positive, more so than the one this morning.

Fuck.

And that's the weird part. I feel fine! It feels like I literally just strained my voice Sunday and recovered from it! But at the same time, I'm actually not fine, and I can kinda feel it.

And I feel like no one talks about this part of COVID. Like, I see all sorts of people saying "Oh, I thought it was just allergies but then I realized I couldn't breathe" and I'm like "how do you mistake COVID for allergies?" And it's because COVID tells you it's nothing. When I actually pay attention to my body, I realize the sore throat is still lingering. My sinuses hurt (and I've actually been a little stuffy and runny). I have a headache. I'm exhausted and want nothing more than to sleep for, like, a week straight. I've had stomach issues all day. But my brain is like "You're not sick! You feel 100% well! Run around and lick all the books at work!" It's fucking WEIRD. I have all these symptoms, but it's like they're invisible to me. Even when I notice them, my brain is so quick to explain them away as allergies, anxiety, talking too much. Even after testing positive! This is probably also why people who were hospitalized will get out of the hospital and go "oh, that wasn't so bad." YOU WERE IN THE HOSPITAL! But COVID convinces them it wasn't bad.

I don't even feel my own symptoms right now. It's fucking terrifying. If not for the positive tests, I'd think nothing was wrong with me.

So really, one of the first signs of COVID is probably the thought "this is definitely not COVID."

#COVID #I'm super high risk of complications so this sucks ass #My parents combined have half the conditions I have and they got COVID and both of them still look/sound awful #I hate everything