#HE'S SO FINE WTFFF | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

love-belle · 8 months

Text

i'll be loving you for quite some time !!!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which their fall-in-love-again era is them pretending as if they aren't back together and having just a little bit fun with everyone.

for when you know it'll be them till the end. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

social media au // lando norris x fem!reader

prequel - i bet you think about me ⋆·˚ ༘ *

warnings - language

author's note - hiiii!!!! so sorry for being inactive i have midterms :/// posting rn bc i js couldn't wait!!!! i hope u like this <3 i love u thank u so much for reading <3

tagged @marsdreamworld @luvrrish @ccallistata @eviethetheatrefreak @f1-futurewag-16-3-4-63

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by lewishamilton, carmenmmundt, alex_albon and 689,625 others

yourusername seeing him tonight it's a bad idea right

6,728 comments

username PLEASE WHAT IS THIS

username MOTHER????? HELLO??????

username ahahahahahahahaha hey there!!!!!!

username she's actually so ❤️

username HELLO THE CAPTION WHAT

-> yourusername i js love my daughter oliviarodrigo

-> oliviarodrigo mom 🫶🏼

username the absolute lack of petty posts we've had from lando and y/n..........

-> username no bc WHAT ARE THEY COOKING 💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥🗣️🗣️🗣️

username pls get back with lando and put me out of my misery 🙏

username what the fuck is going on

username THE CAPTION??? Y/N WHAT.

username no bc i need them BACK together like asap 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

danielricciardo very bad idea

-> yourusername he's annoying

-> danielricciardo very true

username DANIEL SPILL 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

username ahahahahahahahaha!!!!! what.

username js one chance i will never shade u like lando did

username no bc i need them back together before valentine's bc i CANNOT miss on their posts for each like

-> username "here's to my forever valentine, ur annoying and i'm in love ❤️" IM CRYING

-> username istg i will never get over them ://

username FUCK IT IT'S FINE

*liked by yourusername*

charles_leclerc again, listen to me and don't go

-> alexandrasaintmleux shut up

-> yourusername fr

-> charles_leclerc WHY AM I BEING BULLIED

username all the grid is plotting against lando and im here for every second of it

username may god bless the dinosaur that died in order to create the fossil that was processed to fuel that took the car to bring her mom to the hospital to give birth to her

-> yourusername wow

username if she's seeing lando i will SCREAM

username all jokes aside, if they really REALLY broke up then i hope that everyone leaves them alone bc imagine everyone bringing ur ex (the one whom u dated for such a long time) into everything like if i were her that would RUIN me

-> username fr like i love them both but if they really broke up then i hope people leave them alone

username mother is mothering so hard

maxverstappen1 do you not remember what happened the last time?

-> yourusername it wasn't that bad

-> danielricciardo yes it was

-> charles_leclerc yes it was

-> kellypiquet yes it was

-> carlossainz55 yes it was

-> pierregasly yes it was

-> lewishamilton yes it was

-> lilymhe yes it was

-> carmenmmundt yes it was

-> heidiberger_ yes it was

-> yourusername oh my god

-> username LMFAOAOOAOA

-> username bruh the CROWD here rn

username earth is weirdly off it's axis since ur break up pls get back with dad ❤️

username no bc lando better be on all fours if he wants her back like nothing less is VALID

username HER.

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by carlossainz55, pierregasly, maxverstappen1 and 796,426 others

landonorris feels like a taylor swift song

8,728 comments

username LANDO NORRIS WHO IS THAT.

username TOO MUCH TO DISSECT THE LYRICS THE PHOTOS

username THAT'S GOT TO BE Y/N I WILL CRY IF THAT'S NOT HER

username if that's not y/n i will burn down mclaren

-> mclaren fix yourself landonorris

-> landonorris STOP PUTTING ME ON THE SPOT

-> username admin is done with his shit

username yo wtfff

username babe wake up new y/n and lando lore js dropped ❤️

danielricciardo interesting choice of photos

-> landonorris thank you ☺️

username i will not sleep until i get answers

username we !! need !! answers !!

username genuinely on the edge of my seat fr like WHATTT

username the lyrics speak VOLUMES

username no bc if this is not y/n i will in SHAMBLES

-> username FRRRR LIKE WDYM MY COMFORT COUPLE ARE OVER

username guys i know it was for funsies before but it's getting a bit silly now 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

-> username fr like y'all can stop pranking us now thank u.

charles_leclerc i hope she leaves you. AGAIN.

-> landonorris what have i ever done to you.

-> charles_leclerc ate my pasta

-> maxverstappen1 no offense but the day someone eats your pasta, it's the pearly gates for them

-> landonorris facts

-> pierregasly never eat charles' pasta

-> alex_albon it's deadly

-> charles_leclerc STOP TALKING ABOUT MY PASTA

-> charles_leclerc lando i hope she dumps you

-> landonorris you taKE THAT BACK

username LANDO WE NEED ANSWERS

username what the fuck is going is

username nice joke 😐😐😐😐 hard launch NOW.

username no bc that's y/n i don't take any criticism

username where tf are the twitter girlies they need to play detective rn

username lando this is ur last chance at confirming if that's y/n or not or else im hugging a tree at 178 mph

georgerussell63 you don't even listen to taylor swift

-> landonorris i'm a changed man

-> georgerussell63 you're barely a man

-> landonorris BLOCKED

username i live for the grid violating lando at every possible chance

username this has to be illegal they're playing with my blood pressure

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by lewishamilton, lilymhe, charles_leclerc and 713,729 others

yourusername date night but it's js me telling u about my succulents and my cats

8,137 comments

username DATE NIGHT

username mom r u done with dad be so honest

username WHAT ABOUT YOUR CHILDERN (us)

username stay together for the kids ❤️

username SHE'S SO ANGELIC WHATCTHEBFUCK

username oh i js died died

alexandrasaintmleux pretty baby 🤍

-> yourusername i love u 🤍

username forever in awe of her likeeee

username im so in love i might stop breathing

username u can talk to me about plants any day of week!!!!!! i'll even bring my plants and they can have a little photosynthetic date!!!!! and u and i a humanistic one

username i am coming for u mclaren

danielricciardo i wasn't aware of you going on a date - lando (PLEASE UNBLOCK ME)

-> yourusername yeah it's js with this loser 💔 (no.)

-> danielricciardo wow and to think i chose your favourite place tonight UNBLOCK ME

-> yourusername no ❤️

-> username PLEASE WHAT IS THIS INTERACTION

-> username they're talking?????? omg??????

-> username not him still being blocked 😭😭😭😭😭

danielricciardo real daniel here please unblock him

-> yourusername lando give daniel his phone back

-> danielricciardo FUCK YOU

-> yourusername this isn't getting u any brownie points

-> danielricciardo I DON'T WANT ANY I WANT YOU BACK

*danielricciardo deleted this comment*

-> username OH I SAW THAT OMG

-> username lando in his redemption era we love to see it

username i love her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

username lando im puncturing ur tires

username someone check on how lando's doing

lilymhe gorgeous 🫶🏼 you can talk my ear off any day

-> yourusername lily i ADORE u <3

username lando r u still breathing

username AHAHHHHSHDHDHDHDJDKDKSK

-> username real

username my pronouns are she not her bc i'll never be HER

lewishamilton please unblock him he's about to cry

-> maxverstappen1 tears are welling

-> charles_leclerc he's sniffling

-> carlossainz55 eyes have glossed over

-> oscarpiastri holding them tears at bay right now

-> pierregasly can confirm

-> alex_albon please unblock him

-> georgerussell63 he's genuinely sobbing right now

-> mclaren we can hear the cries

-> yourusername LANDO GIVE EVERYONE THEIR PHONE BACK ISTG

-> scuderiaferrari UNBLOCK ME FIRST

-> username oh this man's DEDICATED

username genuinely in ruins rn

username oh to go on a date with her ❤️

francisca.cgomes love 💌

*liked by yourusername*

username im so.

username ???? DATE ????

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by charles_leclerc, danielricciardo, georgerussell63 and 798,528 others

landonorris she's kinda okay

9,728 comments

username WAR IS OVER

username OH MY GOD

username "kinda okay" don't like u weren't in SHAMBLES bc of her

username world is spinning again god bless

username never have i ever felt a sense of relief this immense

username SCREECHING WHAT THE FUCKKKKK

username genuinely speechless rn

charles_leclerc "kinda okay" you cried when she blocked you

-> landonorris OH MY GOD STOP

-> username LMFAOAOAOAO

-> username PLEASE OMG

username im here for every second of this

username YESSSHSHSHSHS

username i just fell to my knees at home depot

username OH MY GOD????????

lewishamilton stop being weepy now x

-> landonorris tell her to stop being mean to me x

-> lewishamilton she said nothing wrong x

-> landonorris SHE CALLED ME A MCDONALD'S CLOWN

-> landonorris x

username THE WAY IM GRINNING RN

username drought is over ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

username they got back for ME

lilymhe you break her heart, i'll nail gun yours. got it?

-> landonorris yes ma'am.

-> username lily u will always be famous ❤️

username THEM.

username the biggest sigh of relief js left me

username NAHHH THIS MFS ARE EVIL LIKEE I ALMOST BROKE DOWN BC OF THEM AND THE WHOLE TIME THEY WERE JS SEEING EACH OTHER

-> username bitches (affectionate)

username missed my parents ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😭😭😭😭😭

username LET'S FUCKING GO

username watch lando get a podium at the next race

-> username oh my man's gonna be motivated

alexandrasaintmleux don't make me pull out the 25272828 messages from u saying how much u love me and those ESSAYS u sent me - y/n

-> landonorris first, DON'T do that

-> landonorris second, why are you using alex no. 2's phone?

-> alexandrasaintmleux first, DON'T tell me what to do

-> alexandrasaintmleux second, i'm blocked???

-> alexandrasaintmleux please don't call me alex no. 2 - alex

-> landonorris first, noted

-> landonorris second, i unblocked you???

-> landonorris sorry alexA force of habit

-> alexandrasaintmleux oh

-> username nah they forced my girl alex to sign off as "alex" on her OWN acc 😭😭😭😭

-> username PLEASE WHAT IS THIS CONVO

-> username the two things i've inferred from above are 1) y/n is not blocked on lando's acc she js chooses to comment from other ppl's phone and refuses to elaborate and 2) lando calls alexandra alex no. 2

-> username this is a WILD place to be

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by kellypiquet, carlossainz55, pierregasly and 799,152 others

yourusername yeah i'll be loving u for quite some time or whatever taylor swift said (❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️)

comments are disabled for this post

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by carlossainz55, alex_albon, danielricciardo and 825,826 others

landonorris happier than ever

11,638 comments

username LANDO NORRIS U ABSOLUTE ASSHOLE

username nah not him using the same caption that he used to shade her

-> username it's almost poetic in a way

username I JUST SCREECHED WHAT THE FUCK

username WAR IS OVER 😭😭😭😭😭😭

username the way i collapsed omg

username THE CAPTION HELP??????

username this is life altering

charles_leclerc not a funny caption

-> landonorris have a sense of humour

-> charles_leclerc i have you as a friend and you're a joke so, i do, in fact, have a sense of humour

-> landonorris you're getting reported for that

-> username LMFAOAOAOAO

-> username PLEASE OMG

username im sooooo here for this

username brb checking if my toaster is waterproof or not

-> username i'll join u!!

username SCREECHING OH MY GOD

username i feel like i've js managed to make two toddlers quit fighting and feel like such a proud parent

-> danielricciardo that's exactly how we feel

-> heidiberger_ so true

-> maxverstappen1 absolutely

-> kellypiquet they were worse than actual kids

-> sebastianvettel they're stubborn

-> scuderiaferrari the amount of times we've had to stop y/n from smashing his car is insane

-> mclaren we had to stay indoors with locked doors scuderiaferrari

-> susie_wolff it was horrible

-> landonorris every single one of you is horrible

-> carmenmmundt fuck u all i hope u step on a lego - y/n

-> landonorris FOR THE LAST TIME YOU'RE NOT BLOCKED yourusername

-> carmenmmundt idc

username life has meaning again

username omg

username THE WEEKND LYRICS OH MY GOD

-> username im folded

username SCREAMING IM SOOOO HAPPY

username they're so ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

username they're actually so taylor swift coded it's INSANE

username brb gonna cry some more

username i used to PRAY for this

danielricciardo could've chosen a different caption - y/n

-> landonorris IT'S THE THOUGH THAT COUNTS

-> danielricciardo terrible thought

-> landonorris i take it back

-> danielricciardo ❤️

danielricciardo this is sweet

-> landonorris thank you

danielricciardo I LOVE YOU

-> landonorris I LOVE YOU MOREEE

danielricciardo bf

-> landonorris gf

-> username what in the world am i witnessing

-> username shh js look away

-> username what in the dando i just witnessed

-> username NOT DANDO OH MY GOD

username sleepover on highway !!!!!!!!!!!!!

username im sooooOOOOooo normal about this (!!!!!!!!!!!)

username ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

danielricciardo nice jacket in the last slide

-> landonorris yeah it'll look even better on your floor

-> danielricciardo mate what the actual fuck

-> landonorris NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

-> landonorris WHERE'S Y/N

-> danielricciardo SHE GAVE ME MY PHONE BACK

-> landonorris OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY

-> heidiberger_ wow

-> yourusername i guess it's js us now heidiberger_

-> heidiberger_ ❤️❤️❤️

-> landonorris NOW YOU CHOOSE TO BE ON YOUR OWN ACCOUNT yourusername???

-> yourusername yes ❤️

-> username this is CRAZY

-> username i genuinely have a whiplash

#f1 x reader #f1 x female reader #f1 imagines #social media au #fake instagram imagines #lando norris fanfic #lando norris imagine #lando norris imagines #lando norris x reader #lando norris x you #lando norris x y/n #lando norris insta au #lando norris fluff #lando norris au #lando norris blurb #lando norris

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maitadori · 1 year

Text

LATE TO THE EVENT nsfw jing yuan x afab!reader

word count : 1.2k

summary : in which you struggle with your zipper and ask your husband for help, big mistake, really.

content / cw : somewhat smut, grinding, implied sexual intercourse at the end, cocky smug jing yuan (hes so annoying i love him), he’s soooo whipped for you

a/n : u mfs blew my jing yuan drabble up quickkkk wayyyy faster than my blade, like wtfff. y’all do not play abt this man

DARK CONTENT BLOGS PLZ DNI!!!

"beloved," comes one knock, "you're taking an awfully long time in there. what's holding you up?" another knock.

it's not until he's rapping his fist against the wooden door twice more that you finally speak up. "don't worry about it! just know i'll be out in a second, okay?"

your voice is muffled, but even then, jing yuan could still sense a tinge of panic in your tone.

behind the closed door your muttering curses as you strain your arms to try and lift your zipper.

"dammit..." you mutter, letting go of your dress and stretching once your arms starts to cramp.

you don't want to try too hard, you're out of breath and you might pull a muscle if you go any further.

"beloved, you're scaring me. can i come in?"

"no!!" you exclaim before you can think.

it's not that you didn't want him to come in, you just really wanted your look to be a surprise. when you picked out this dress, you were blown away at how nice it looked on you.

it was a white skin tight dress that hugged your figure in a way that made you look enticing. the straps were thin and your breasts sit in it perfectly.

you were a humble, modest person. but seeing yourself in the reflection, you couldn't help the slight ego boost you got.

you really wanted to see his reaction to your look. and if he came in now, that'd ruin everything.

"okay i'm coming in." he tries to turn the knob only to jiggle it and find out it was locked.

you anticipated that'd happened and fortunately planned ahead.

"jing yuan, i'm fine, i promise! just something with my makeup. i'll be done in a second."

you turn your back to the mirror and turn your chin over your shoulder to look at the reflection in hopes of getting a better look at the object of your annoyance.

"beloved, i know how to pick locks." his tone is arrogant and smug, like it usually is when he wants to show off.

you scoff, tugging on your zipper, successfully getting it up about halfway before you relent.

"if i let you in, promise you won't look?"

"that's like asking me not to breathe."

"jing yuan!"

"okay okay. i won't look. an odd request, but i'll listen."

you can't bring yourself to believe him fully but you unlock the door anyways. it creaks open slowly and you peek past the door to see him covering his eyes with his hands.

he hears the quiet scream of the door and tries to peek through his fingers, but can you really call yourself his spouse if you didn't know him? you slap your hands over his to cover his sight further before he could look.

"jing yuan!"

"i'm sorry, i'm sorry! can you really blame me? i want to see you."

"you can... soon. just.. do me a favor first." your hands cautiously drop from their place over his, "you can't look!"

"i won't!"

you try not to stare at his attire, his matching white suit. he was too attractive for his own good, instead you give him a disdainful look he can't see, and guide his hands away from his eyes. "keep 'em closed."

"i know," he groans, exasperated.

you guide his hands to your zipper, watching his face like a hawk. you slowly turn towards the mirror, your back to him, and keep an eye on his face through the reflection.

"can you zip me up?"

his hands are huge and warm. he splays them across your back under the guise of stabilizing his fingers on the small zipper— but with the way he's caressing your skin, you question if he's doing it on purpose.

he finds the zipper successfully, yet his wandering hands don't cease. your eyes close on instinct, like they always do under his touch, and you sigh blissfully. you know this is bad, and you know you might be falling under his trap— like you always do— but he’s your husband, and he knows you like the back of his hand.

his lips kiss your head and your eyes fly open to see him— as you suspected— meet your gaze in the mirror, eyes open and expression gloating.

"jing yuan!!!" you exclaim, struggling to get out of the hold he puts you in, wrapping his arms around your waist as he pulls you into his chest. you lift your hand and try to cover his eyes, but he only chuckles and grabs your wrist, using his free hand to grab your chin and lock your lips.

"you're so gorgeous," he mutters, leaning down into your neck to kiss any spot he can get his lips on.

"you weren't supposed to see!! it was supposed to be a surprise…”

his finger finds your zipper once more and relief fills your body. he tugs it up a bit and you assume he's quitting the act.

how foolish of you.

the hug of your dress loosens on your body as jing yuan tugs the zipper down in quick succession. a shrill gasp leaves your lips. your straps slip down your shoulders and you quickly hold your arms over your chest before the air kisses your breasts.

"you— i cant believe you...! we have an event to go to!! one that's dedicated to you!!" you glare at him through the mirror, blatantly ignoring the way he’s checking you out, eyes dark and full of lust.

"when i have someone as hot as you wearing something this sexy right in front of me, how do you expect me to think about anything else?" he's guiding you to lean against the sink, placing kisses on any patch of skin that your dress doesn't cover.

your quick breaths get replaced with whimpers as he sucks blemishes into your shoulder. your mind hazes and you can't bring it in yourself to protest.

"jing yuan... we're gonna be late!! seriously!"

he hums, muttering a quiet that's okay, i'm the general so who'll speak against me? it had a cocky timbre to it that made you bristle.

he managed to bend you over the sink, hands on your hips as he starts to grind you against him. your breath falters and your eyes momentarily roll back. it didn’t take long for you to yield and you hate yourself for it.

the feeling of his semi-hard cock rubbing against you has breathy whines leaving your lips, along with a small string of quiet sir sir, sir!!’s

his lips leave your body and he’s leaning up, not stopping the grinding of your clothed sex against him. you can feel a wet spot forming and a pang of anger fills you once you realize your husband’s horniness will be the ruin of this gorgeous dress.

you try to take on a commanding tone, as if you weren’t just moaning out for him, “we have to go the event!! y—you hear me!? i’m… not gonna let you ruin this dress!!” but he bunches your dress up to your waist, the fabric of his pants rub against your covered clit and you’re instantly putty against the sink.

jing yuan ignores your words, and you can tell from the indicating sound of his belt unbuckling.

“jing yuan!!!!”

“i don’t want anyone else seeing you in this dress,” is all he says before he’s pushing your panties to the side. “we’ll go after i’m done with you, ‘kay?”

“i can’t believe you!!!”

jing yuan taglist : @ceylestia @comettheasteroid @voidsatoru @blazervain @meaningofaeons some of u i couldn’t tag sorrryyyy

if u wanted to be added to my taglist, just ask!!!

#honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #jing yuan x reader #jing yuan x you #jing yuan #hsr #honkai star rail #jing yuan smut #🃏; saturn.writes

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bravo4iscool · 6 months

Note

girl, I’m not gonna lie to you, I have some free time, and sometimes I really like to use it uselessly. and I found your ig account, then I did some other research and I found a lot about you and your family, so I could really rate you. And yes, I can say properly: you’re ugly.

now, you're kinda right, I give you that. some fit guys do like fat women, maybe one guy out of ten. but these are REALLY PRETTY WOMEN, 'cause I don’t deny that there are beautiful fat women, but they are usually rare, and that’s definitely not you.

I’m not seeking validation wtfff has nothing to do with anything, girl… you seem stupid. I just really found your behavior hilarious. like, how the false illusion of the new age got you, making you really believe in fairy tales. I mean, you're clearly so insecure, trying to pass as “I’m fine with my weight” while really trying to convince yourself that you’re desirable. and like, you’re not 😭 and it’s so fun when you talk about validation, because, you see, I may be petty or bitter or mean, or whatever it is. but, if you really felt confident, pretty, and good about yourself, you would just turn off the anon or ignore me. but no, you’re here, writing answers so you can post and be consoled. that’s how I know you feel pathetic and horrible about yourself, and need these other weirdos to help you fool yourself. you can ignore me, or reply me, it won’t make difference. you too fucking transparent, so easy to read.

or you wouldn’t be doing headcanons of really fit men attracted to you, because if you were desirable and if you really felt that way, you would just know, and not try to reaffirm yourself along with other equally UGLY FAT GIRLS. the main thing here is how out of touch you are with reality. close the tumblr, go to a nice spot in your town, where you KNOW there are hot guys, and please record yourself being chosen by them. if you're so sure of yourself. and open your instagram account, since you have nothing to hide and being ashamed. I mean, you’re pretty right? lol

y’know i’m not doing this cuz i’m insecure💀 also, i never said those hc’s were about me LMAO. i’m very aware that he and every other cod character is fucking fictional💀. this is just my hobby😗✌🏼.

also, why are you so keen about finding out about my personal life? wtf do i have to do with you? it’s fucking creepy to stalk my ig and all that💀. who tf do you think you are?

the only one being pathetic here is you, because you’re out here insulting me via anon haha. at least grow the balls to confront me correctly lol.

but yk, your stupidity and insecurity is pretty hard to ignore. you can have your opinion about me but let me be. i didn’t ask you for it lmao. also, i couldn’t care less about your opinion. you can think i’m ugly, idgaf, but stop annoying me with it.

and idk if you know but talking down on other people has to do with one’s insecurities, so maybe you’re the insecure one here😘.

and yes, i’m fine with my weight. i’ve come to terms with it, since i can’t change it without a medical intervention. is it so hard to believe that someone overweight actually accepts that fact or what? it says that says a lot about you actually.

also, i’m posting this so people can see that there are, unfortunately, still people with the iq of a fucking brick out there. i couldn’t care less about what they tell me. as i said, i’m perfectly fine on my own.

i’m actually laughing writing this because i won’t ignore you. people like you should rethink their life choices ngl.

you’re going crazy over a tumblr post and start to insult me as fat and ugly and you started to fucking stalk me. you’re being the prime example for insecurity rn💀.

your messages can get as long as you want them to be, i will respond to them because it’s sad people still think like you.

there are people out there saying all things about cod or ghost or whoever. if i don’t like them, i scroll, but i don’t start insulting and stalking the author of that post/headcanon/fic or whatever.

grow tf up and get a helmet💀.

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erodasfishtacos · 2 years

Note

Pilot!Harry

Wtfff you can’t just do that to me !! I live for this concept though it’s sooooo hot .

Harry gets out of the cockpit to stretch his legs on the eight hour plane ride, pops out to find YN sitting on her phone.

“Can you get me a club soda with lime?” Harry asks as he stretches his arms, he said it nicely and with manners he usually didn’t have.

“Can you go fuck yourself?” YN replies without even looking up at him, too busy with her game of candy crush.

She gasps in shock when she’s pushed back with force, his hand wrapping around her throat, and making her eyes meet his in surprise.

“I said a club soda with lime, pet,” He repeats slowly, with a distinct drawl to make the words sharper and show that he means business.

YN just glares at him, trying ignore the way her panties are getting absolutely soaked - his rings cold against her skin.

“Are you acting like this ‘cause of last night?” Harry hisses in disbelief, his grip tightening enough to make her chest heave a bit faster, “You’re being a brat because I only let you come once because I was exhausted from a long day? Spoiled.”

“I wanted more,” YN manages to get out in a displeased tone, not trying to pull away from his grip at all.

“M’still wet, please,” YN begged as she laid back against the mattress, wriggling her hips with impatience.

Harry chuckles in bewilderment, sweat dripping from his jaw down his neck, chest flushed from his orgasm, and exhaustion settling into his bones.

“No, you can wait. We need to sleep, sweet girl,” He tells her, he gets so sweet - late at night, when she’s been compliant and good for him.

“Want it,” YN pouts, Harry just admiring how gorgeous her bare body is - nipples all nicely bitten and her tummy bruised from his teeth.

“Hush,” Harry replies, cutting her off with kiss before he’s slipping off the bed to get a washcloth to wipe her down.

“If you don’t get me my drink, you won’t be coming again for weeks. I promise you that,” Harry threatens before releasing his hold and stepping back.

“Fine,” YN bites back, clicking off her phone and brushing past the captain.

“That’s my girl,” Harry praises before disappearing back into the cockpit.

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

#pilot!harry #pilotrry #harry styles writing #file

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sugawarassoulmate · 8 months

Note

Hii! I was binge reading your loser kuroo and oh my god 😭 it's literally everything I hope you don't mind me just venting everything I felt when reading fr.

The dynamic is just amazing! I'm not sure if bully!reader is not that common (everytime I search it's a bit hard to find, so omgg when I came across your work!). Sub guys are just 😪😔 a want you know?

The (lots of) 'first' interactions they had were so ughshsjsbs S-est tier! I felt the excitement on my body, like actually for real! Not gonna be a weirdo and get into details 🤭

And since I was reading it throughout the day I had to pause a few times, chorezz, and when it was getting too tiring and boring I'd stop to read and!! That's when the more angsty ones started and I was about to combust like lord how can life be like that?? Ik I'm being dramatic but it was like the story was kind of matching my mood.

So! It was the best rollercoaster I've been on so far. And again I really hope I'm not being too pushy? but I wanted to ask about some parts of the universe if that's fine! 😔

• are all of the works connected in the universe? I feel like to some point yes, not all of them, but you're the author!!

• about their dynamic in bed!! is the mc kind of like a sub? cause mc definitely leads the relationship. and how would tetsuro define himself? cause he acts like a sub (just realized how repetitive it sounds, sorry!) but when it comes to sex, at times he seems to be the one in "control", control might not be the best word to describe but, you know? for example when he's drunk. Sorry I don't know how to exactly say what's on my mind but you have a gigantic brain!! So I think the question is a tiny bit understandable.

• that part where he started showing interest in someone else?? That was my biggest wtfff moment (very respectfully). The part where I think I have more questions about. I feel like I'm really pushing my luck by asking these, so of course you can ignore these or just idk 😭. 1. Why did he start having feelings for someone else?? 2. Why did mc just ignore it like it was nothing when in other occasions they would be livid? 3. Why did *he* do that to mc? I was like damn bro there's no true love anywhere. In some occasions you mentioned mc being insecure and things like that. 4. How did mc really take it? Did mc feel sad at all with all that? What was mc really feeling through it all? Why did mc forgive him so easily? How was it when they got 'back together'? was mc even more of a cruel bitch to teach him a lesson or something? I'm light headed just thinking about it 😩.

I'm pretty sure there's more I want to ask but I can't remember right now and I feel like I went way over the socially acceptable to ask 😷

I just saw that were both infp and leo!! So happy very belated!!!

Thank you for the patience!

omg no i love these kinds of questions!!! i’m so glad you love their dynamic 🥹 trust me i love hearing all y’alls thoughts when it comes to my stuff it makes me so happy.

i’ll answer your questions one by one haha

okey the worlds are kind of connected. you’re definitely right that in some ways they are and other ways they aren’t. i like the idea of everything being kinda interconnected in the sense that loser!kuroo, bully!osamu, and stoner!suga can all exist in one universe (the peach cinematic universe if u will) but i didn’t want to make hard rules if that makes sense??? cause i didn’t want to limit what scenarios i could put the characters in! so there’s deff the canon of osamu and reader being childhood frenemies and kuroo and his reader being college lab partners yeah but other than there aren’t rigid rules they have to follow. the freedom allows people to send in whatever request they want for those characters (so long as it doesn’t break my rules!!!) i hope that makes sense!!!

you’re definitely right about reader and loser!kuroo’s dynamic in bed! i just thought it was interesting for the mean, abrasive character to also be the sub in bed?? like “you’re a fucking loser, you can’t do anything without me but alsoooo please pin me down and hold me in bed.” i tend to imagine reader as being shorter/smaller than kuroo (but y’all can imagine reader any way you want!!) just cause i like the idea of mean person a who bullies and bosses around their much bigger/taller person b 😅

ok!!!!!! so i’m glad you caught onto that! it’s a dynamic that i’ve kind of been playing around with bc i have plans for a longer, possibly chaptered fic with that kind of plot in mind. if y’all remember that monstrous 8k fic i wrote for bully!samu and reader….i kinda want to do something similar??? (maybe reader finally tells kuroo she loves him?????) that’s very tbd at the moment haha

this was fun!! it felt like a press conference 😂😂😂 please send more asks like this i love talking about my writing and i LOVE even more hearing what all of you think!!!!

it’s not a bother to me at all!!!

#asks #💌

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inchidentally · 1 month

Text

I've got a few asks that are all actually roughly under the same umbrella in terms of my replies - and be aware I've had to get way more serious then usual so pls skip if you're not here for that <3

mmmmm yea you can feel as you want anon but I personally am not going to want to parallel that relationship with Oscar and Lily's. my main cause when it comes to wives and girlfriends is that they all deserve to be protected against rampant, casual misogyny in fandom spaces. but also to not to project any reflected good will onto her boyfriend or husband simply because he's the boyfriend or husband. and there's so much about the 2000s drivers that makes me hope that at least some of their behavior isn't being carried on with the current younger guys on the grid :///

also just as a reminder: I was raised by intersectional feminists and I've witnessed what even supposedly "loving" het relationships can do to people who identify as women* - so I'm never going to be rooting for heterosexual relationships as far as women are concerned. I'm not overly prejudiced and I fully support any woman's choices for herself - and I don't have the smallest delusion that I have a right to an opinion on those choices <3 but equally I'm not going to lie to myself that women don't statistically always lose or sacrifice something of themselves when they become a partner to a man and that the man loses and sacrifices nothing - and if he makes the most basic effort he's praised as a god among men. especially not a man who's career has and will always take priority over his relationship and especially if the woman has to navigate or alter her life to deal with the man's profession, public image or his fanbase. I will always want women to pursue life on their own terms without men in any way dragging them down or altering their lives - that's just my opinion and it's fine if others disagree or hopefully project onto those relationships for any reason. so far, to me, the only driver's relationships that seem at all truly balanced and not negatively affecting or requiring compromises of the women that the man doesn't have to repay, are Lily and Alex and Melissa and Nando - and while I don't know much about them probably Tiffany and Valtteri. those women were already fully adults when they met these guys and would be able to leave the relationships whenever they want without having their own individual lives and incomes affected or altered in any way. I do not see any excuse for a woman to be in a relationship in any other way or with any further sacrifice and especially not because of a man, who will always enjoy economic and social power above hers.

*I know this is a whole unique point but as far as I'm concerned identifying as a woman is how I'm referring to women at any time. TERFs DNI.

ok so I've heavily edited these next two bc my blog is not the place to get into All That and I don't want to bring stress and negativity to moots

I think the funniest part of this rumor is how everyone's been asking for a screen recording of this and absolutely no one can produce anything other than one screencap of Rebecca at one brief time offering subscription content with no explanation for what - and that was something all models and influencers did for a while to make some money when a bunch of platforms screwed over their engagement. everyone's just running with this as if it's anyting and wtfff you're saying all she was offering were 'pictures of Carlos from the back' LIKE BFFR what are y'all even saying here ??? who was being robbed what crime was committed how is this even worth remembering ??? the reach being rought!!

but on the serious side, I'm gonna need all of you to sit yourselves in a quiet place and start taking this spontaneous and erratic morality that magically shows up when women are involved and start actually applying it to your pookie bears in F1. because not only does Carlos and the rest of the grid exploit the media, fans and sponsorships for cash, gifts, engagement and popularity - they also endorse and personally directly fund and engage with entire companies and individuals who actively perpetuate and uphold the absolute gutter of amorality and social iniquity that is the foundation of this whole sport !!

like here you guys are hunting for any tiny scrap of something to further the prejudice that these wives and girlfiends are not your ideas of Perfect Pure Sainted Angels - meanwhile you're looking at hugely problematic words and actions from your favorite driver and literally assuming that they've suddenly "had a change of heart" or are "better people now" based on ???? nothing ???? and THEN you start hoping that the girlfriend or wife is "good for him" or that she won't "be bad for him" I feel like I'm losing my fucking mind since when does a girl or woman over the age of 15 think that rich, powerful white men in hugely problematic fields of work are the ones being cruelly corrupted by the women they personally choose to date ??? if these men are shitheads then they did it all on their own babes !!

and I have to assume that even die hard Carlos fans on here are aware of how he's very much not perfect and that anyone sensible has to admit that unless he made the decision to publicly and loudly make a statement to the contrary then all of his opinions and affiliations are the same. you can absolutely compartmentalize these guys - we all do! - in order to like certain things about them or engage in content about them, but nobody should be out here so woman-hating as to take nothing of substance and use it to award these men virtues that have no foundation in reality. all while vilifying their wives and girlfriends over literally the smallest thing or making the most tenuous of connections to try and prove why they shouldn't be with your fave guy. or because while the men can fuck and cheat all they want, you've decided the women they date or marry have to conform to regressive ideas of female purity.

(just to clarify, the stuff I'm referring to "men" or "drivers" as doing is not specifically referring to Carlos or one man in particular but about the wider issue of double standards between drivers and their girlfriends and wives)

so a wife or gf of a man with an all-consuming career that involves her altering her life and plans to go all over the world just to be with him, decides to do exactly what he does and utilize a fanbase and popularity for gain? suddenly she's an evil conniving witch capable of manipulating and controlling poor widdle rich, white, powerful, influential man !! even though he dumps women and cheats on women whenever he wants and doesn't face a single bit of criticism for fans' perceptions of problems in his relationships but oh he's just a helpless hard-working victim who is nobly doing his dream job that his one percenter family and/or social status and/or race and gender made completely effortless for him and how DARE his wife or girlfriend get any of the financial benefit from a field of sports where women are so hated that even the most powerful woman is publicly accused by the highest authority in the sport of collusion based on nothing more than one gossip columnists lie !!

I could go so fucking far about how the women these men date and marry have been socially groomed from birth to be beautiful and silently supportive of their man and told they're not good enough or smart enough to succeed in a "serious" business environment - and that the drivers conveniently always end up with beautiful women who suffer at the hands of his fans who blame women for how men treat them all while he says nothing so as not to upset his base of support - then fuck it, let them all sell you people subscriptions for pictures of the drivers! let them scrape even a tiny fraction off the top of this imbalanced and unfair socioeconomic dynamic compared to the huge, unearned kickbacks and handshakes that make these men so effortlessly successful and rich. you can see those subscriptions as payment on your part for spreading rumors and hate about women and using double standards.

the rich famous man will NOT change his life to either fit your rpf ship - or to stay single so that you can continue your parasocial relationship with him uninterrupted - or choose a woman based on who you deem to be an appropriate self-insert. no matter how many rumors you believe or spread or how often you post content hating on his partner, his choice will not be affected by you. so keep those delusions and misogyny to yourself - or at least away from my blog and inbox !

honestly anon, I've already known the content of all of your messages over the past few months and I'm choosing the least offensive one for a reason to post (edited ofc so no one can accuse me of slander or whatever)

listen: if I was at all saying that Carlos is unproblematic or publicly promoting him in any way then I'd absolutely deserve what you're saying. but for myself personally, Carlos is part of am f1blr specific hyperfixation where I stay on my blog and write stupid narratives using drivers for fun. I'm not contributing anything to his overall fanbase or giving him any of my financial or personal support. I stick to fandom spaces only and not any platform that the drivers or anyone in wider F1 circles use.

and the thing is that not only would it be putting the burden of his problematicness on me if I were to post your asks bc I alone would have to answer for them, it would also probably just be informing people of what's fully and easily available to find elsewhere. everyone I mutually follow and most people I see are fully aware that we're taking these men and for the most part using them for our own fanon rather than their actual reality. so for me to pick one driver and say look at these awful realities then I'd have to do that with all of them, including the drivers who are at all friendly with known problematic drivers and people. so while I totally understand if someone wants to kick all of F1 out of their fandom experience bc Men then jfc absolutely go for it. I'm not at all pretending that what I'm doing on my blog is worth the smallest shit! but me deciding to pick one driver out of all of them to put on blast would do nothing but make me a hypocrite and rightfully have people asking me why I don't talk about this or that driver too.

and quite frankly unless someone never supports with any male-majority content and solely focuses all of their time to intersectional feminist content then there ain't a leg to stand on to blast any other fanbase or focus on one particular person. it's fully fair to be critical! but not to get on a high horse if there's even one cishet man in your list of fandom things. honestly that could even be broadened in some cases to one cis man.

absolutely, take the truth to people who are out there on public platforms trying to claim that any of these drivers are saints and perfect humans where they could potentially be recruiting to a fanbase using false narratives and covering up problematic behavior. but ask yourself if you're time is best spent mostly attacking women and girls in fanbases over this or going right to the comments and tags that squarely target the men themselves.

but on here I've got to kind of assume we all know what the score is and nobody's in denial that these are mere Rich Powerful Men and none of them deserves our actual serious allegiance yk ??? I feel like we're all aware this is us having fun and we're all accepting that while we can block and blacklist tags based on personal preferences, none of us in f1blr who likes a male driver can pretend to be superior to liking a different one. at best they're better at keeping their mouths shut but they also permit and overlook a LOT. and yes, that includes Lewis even though my god he has a gigantic lead on the rest in terms of progressive actions and deeds compared to any other man in F1. and that while he still has unaddressed problematic associations and behavior, all of us white fans need to be fucking vigilant of going after him if we're not fully going ten times harder on the white drivers.

#inchreplies #I am exhausted lol #I'm mostly a stupid so this is my brain done for the day !!#I hope everything makes sense I rly spent time on these since the topics actually matter #wank adjacent #f1partnerstalk

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bcdluckstumblcd · 4 days

Text

some !! random Elsa and Jin stuff cause @variantia got me thinking

Not really relevant to anything but IN the event of a zombie apocalypse or something of the sort and IF he were to be in a situation where it was him and Elsa, he's obviously going to be super protective and careful and make sure she's rested and safe and gets her share of food first and he's absolutely jumping into danger for her and IF he gets bit or hurt on the way it's FINE, he's always been tough, he'll be okay. He won't tell her because he doesn't want to worry her if it's not that serious! But he's going to be a bit more distanced just in case.

Jin surviving and being saved by Elsa and knowing she's genuinely trying but WHEW yike seeing her be close and friendly and defense of Hawks!! Next time he saw her after that he'd just be so cold but like also !! He'd just blame himself more like Oops here he goes TRUSTING people again wtfff

Him in the rehabilitation au when Elsa gives him a job at her agency!!?? Oh he is employee of the MONTH, of the YEAR. He is on his BEST behavior!! He is volunteering for any assignments he's allowed to take and really does his best to be a type of hero HE needed and he absolutely expresses that to Elsa like, he def sits down and expresses how grateful he is to her and that he hopes he can be useful on her team and not a waste of an oppertunity (cause it's one of the first times besides the League when someone took a chance on him and trusted him

!! Villain Elsa's verse just Jin opening up to Elsa about losing HIS little sister hoping it'll be like a bonding thing like depending on how much he knows and how much Elsa tells him he'd be like "i get it, i lost family too and it felt like my fault because i couldn't do anything to save them." like he wasn't a child himself and he's showing Elsa so much kindness and care because he can tell she needs someone gentle and that loves and accepts her just like HE needed and honestly his favorite hang outs are when it's him and Elsa and Toga watching movies or something.

psssst Jin absolutely picking up/learning some Norwegian and asking her for help when he gets stuck on a word/phrase!!

Still thinking about the second one because she would have to work SO HARD to get on her get to even acknowledge her genuinely like whew that's on the brink of "eveyone treats me like a villain so much maybe I might as well play the part huh? Cause HAWKS REALLY?! Him being like yeah all heroes must be trash, of course you'd defend your own even though he admitted to trying to kill me and betrayed me and my family." Oh he'd be so heated and hurt

#i actually have a lot more tbh #variantia

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rodricksfilipinagf · 2 years

Text

Secret Admirer: Rodrick Heffley x Reader

“You want me to kiss Rodrick? Rodrick hates me!” I protest. I could see him across the room, laughing with his friends and looking super hot. I kinda hated him too. He had no right being that fine while making my life miserable every day.

“He totally has a thing for you. Whenever he’s around you I can sense the sexual tension,” my friend says.

Rodrick catches me staring at him and sarcastically winks at me. Great, now he’s going to think I was checking him out. He’s going to tease me relentlessly about that later. The last thing I want to do is kiss him.

I decide to go into the living room the long way around, and weave my way through people. I unfortunately stumble on something, but I’m rescued by someone strong and warm.

“Thank you so m-“ The smile dies on my lips. “Rodrick?” Why does he have to be so cute up close?

“What are you, throwing yourself at me now?” Of course Rodrick is going to make fun of me for this.

“I didn’t know it was you,” I protest.

He snorts. “Yeah, like you didn’t check me out earlier. Your crush on me is becoming more and more obvious.”

“I don’t have a crush on you. I can’t stand you.”

He pulls me down on one of the steps to sit by him. “You don’t think I notice how you always blush whenever I talk to you?”

“You’re always trying to embarrass me.”

“Sure. It has nothing to do with you liking me.”

“Why would I like an asshole like you?”

“You tell me,” he says, and he’s close enough to kiss but I just push him away, infuriated.

I try to find a quiet area in the house but can’t. I end up stewing outside in his backyard.

I get an email from my secret admirer. “Hey I’m at Rodrick’s party if you wanted to meet.”

WHAT? Meet the person who’s been sending me all those sweet, romantic notes? After my encounter with Rodrick, that’d be MUCH needed.

“YES! Where and when?” I message back.

“Rodrick’s room, 15 minutes? All the other rooms are taken.”

Shit. He doesn’t expect us to…like, do stuff in there, right? Probably not, right? He’s always so thoughtful in his notes.

“Ok,” I message back. “I can’t wait to meet you!!” I add a bunch of smiley faces too. I decide to head up there right away. On the way there I check my makeup in the bathroom to make sure it still looks okay. I spend the last 5 minutes nervously refreshing my email on my phone. 8:58 I hear the door opening and internally squeal. This is it. But instead of my soul mate it’s the most unwelcome sight possible.

“Ughh, what are you doing here, get out,” I groan.

Rodrick raises an eyebrow. “You know this is my room, right?”

“Whatever, I’m supposed to be meeting someone here, so get out.”

Rodrick lets out a laugh.

“What? I know it’s hard to believe but I like someone, and they like me.”

“Yeah, I know you like someone. You’re totally into me.”

“You wish, Heffley. Now can you get out before you ruin everything?”

He rolls his eyes at me. “Yeah, sure, let me take care of something first.” He settles at the edge of the bed and starts typing something on his phone.

“Can you not do that outside?” I hiss.

“Not really,” he replies dryly.

“Fine,” I snap. If he’s going to be rude, whatever. I write to my secret admirer, “I’m really sorry but Rodrick’s not leaving and I can’t get rid of him. Can we meet somewhere else?” and send it.

Rodrick bursts into laughter at something. “Has anyone ever told you how dumb you are?” he asks, looking right at me.

“You’re such a jerk, Rodrick. And you’re out of your mind to think I would ever like you.” I refresh my email angrily. Finally a reply.

There’s no subject line. All it says in the body is, “Oh, am I?”

WTFFF??

I look up and Rodrick is staring right at me. “Do you finally get it now?” Rodrick asks, smirking.

“Yeah, dickhead. You were tricking me the entire time. I can’t believe I thought someone actually liked me. Go to hell!” I scream, but Rodrick grabs my hand and won’t let go.

“You really think I was lying about how I felt about you?” Rodrick demands.

“Yes!! You’re always looking for ways to humiliate me, why should this be any different?”

“I’ve always thought you were smart, and cool, and so beautiful. I just didn’t think you’d believe me if I said all those things.”

“Well, I don’t believe you. I thought I was talking to a sweet guy who would be honest with me.”

“You want me to be honest with you?”

“Yeah, Heffley, that’d be a start.” I cross my arms.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you ever since that day we got detention because of me. But I thought I had no chance with you. I guess I just got used to being an asshole to you in real life and being nice to you online.”

“Which one of them’s the real you?” I ask.

“Both, I guess. I can’t stop thinking about you, for real. If you had any idea how many songs I’ve written because I can’t get you out of my head…”

I blush. “How many?”

He reaches for my hand. “Tons. I get if you don’t want to be with me, but I really want to be with you.”

“Look, if all that you said really is true, then you’re a really great guy, Rodrick.”

“So you’re not disappointed it’s me?”

“I guess not. I’ve always thought you had the dreamiest, sexiest eyes in the entire world.”

His eyes widen and he smiles.

“Also, your lips are amazing, can I just-“ I’m cut off as those lips touch mine and our tongues intertwine. Kissing Rodrick Heffley is incredibly hot.

“I don’t want to go back downstairs. Can we just stay up here? I really just want to be with you more.”

“You want to touch me more,” Rodrick clarifies.

“Thought you were going to stop trying to embarrass me,” I say.

Rodrick traces the blush on my cheek. “Never,” he says before kissing me again.

#rodrick #doawk rodrick #rodrick heffley #rodrick heffley x reader #rodrick rules

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vhagarswar · 9 months

Text

Daeron returns home shitpost.

Daeron:*returns to King's landing*

Daeron::)

Daeron that night: *asleep in his own rooms*

A door: *slammed*

Daeron: wtfff

Aegon, wearing his hobo cloak: Greetings brother.

Aemond, also wearing his cloak but his is is made of quality fabric: *silence*

Daeron; Hello. I- what is going on?

Aegon: It is time brother.

Aemond: *annoyed*

Daeron:??

Aegon:

Aemond:

Daeron:

Aegon: ask me what it's time for please I have other things to do unfortunately.

Daeron: Time for what?

Aegon: to get It wet.

Daeron; to get what wet?

Aegon: awh he's so innocent bless his innocent mind uwu adorable.

Aegon: *demonic voice* we must corrupt his soul

Aemonds mind; kittens and puppies. Meow.

Aegon: it's time to become a man

Daeron: you want me to kill someone?!

Aegon: what? No. Why do you both think of murder 24/7 what is up with that?!

Aemond: it's the traumas.

Daeron: we are at war

Aegon: fuck the damn war I wanna do something fun and hang out with my brothers!!!

Daeron: Fine. Lets go to a brothel I suppose.

Aemond:*as a big brother* ah he can't use the words whore house.

Aegon: we'll teach him soon enough.

The three of them; sneak out of the castle

Aegon: I can't believe we pulled that off

Daeron: security sucks here

Aemond; agreed.

A deep voice: You have all forsaken me. You have betrayed me. You will all perish

A cloaked figure:*approaches*

Aemond: gods is this..

Aegon: father?

Daeron: wait we have one?

The cloaked figure:*giggles*

The cloaked figure:*reveals herself*

Helaena: I heard you all sneak out. Why didn't you invite me with you? I love late night outings!:))

Aegon:

Aemond:

Daeron:

Helaena: where are we going? Is there food? I like night food. Did anyone bring coin?

Aemond; it is dangerous for you to be here

Helaena: what danger is there for me surrounded by my brother's and the fiercest warriors of the realm?

Aemond:*blushes*

Aegon: are the warriors with us right now?

Daeron: she means us

Aegon: o.

Helaena: so what do we have planned?

Daeron: they were planning to go to a bro-

Aemond: Brother! Our plans have altered last minute remember

Daeron: what but you all promised me-

Aegon: one day, young apprentice. One day.

Aemond: I was never called your apprentice

Helaena: I'm getting bored here

Aemond: i suppose we could take her to see the night Market. That is entertaining.

Helaena: SHOPPING YIPPIE

Later

A witch: do you wish to know your death child?

Helaena: no, do you? I see you hanging from the ceiling of your own house your own neck cracked and twisted-

Witch: *gawks*

Daeron: damn

Aegon, holding four cups of wine and handing it to his siblings: I got everyone a cup. Drink up quickly the night is young.

Aemond, watches someone swallow a sword: that's just a waste of the sword

Daeron: can't imagine it tastes good as well

Later

Music plays

Helaena: I wanna dance!

Aegon; fine

Helaena: No I wanna dance.

Helaena: Aemond?

Aemond, blushing: yes my queen?

Helaena: you want to hold my bag when I dance with Daeron?

Aemond:*demonic mjttering* yes of course

Daeron and Helaena; dance

Aemond:

Aegon: where did he learn to dance as that?

Aemond; can't have been with us

Later

A hobo:

Aegon: who the fuck is that

Aemond; idk keep an eye on helaena. He smells of horse piss

Hobo:???

Helaena: O, hello Ser Criston!:)

Daeron: hello! *unaware who criston is*

aemond and aegon:*gawk*

Criston: *removes his hood and looks at Aemond*

Aemond:*looks away*

Aemond; we can explain

Helaena: Daeron wanted to see King's Landing so we took him out.

Criston: during the hour of the owl? Are you aware how this could have ended for all of you?

Helaena: Please sir criston. *puppy eyes and dark magic*

Cirston: Fine but I stay. You need someone to watch you all.

Helaeana: Yess!

Helaena at some point: you know what we should do?

Daeron; *asleep*

Aemond: no? What should we do my queen?

Aegon: careful aemond I can hear your voice switch between regular Aemond and aroused demon

Helaena: Haha you're funny aegon aemond is as a sweet little brother to me:))

Aemond::(

Helaena; we should get matching tattoos

Aegon: that sounds cool let's do it

Aemond: what kind of tattoo

Helaena: a spider wearing the crown of Aegon I drenched in blood and with "We light the way' under it.

Aemond; I stand corrected that sounds cool

Aegon:*drags daeron as the three of them go find a tattoo person*

Helaena after the tattoos are finished: Oh you are all so handsome

Aemond, looking at his tattoo

Aemond; Uhm he made a mistake.

Helaena: No I changed my mind. I wanted a unicorn instead.

Daeron: It's not the worse

Aegon: What the fuck are you talking about there's a unicorn on my arm

Daeron:*walks up to a village maiden and shows her the unicorn*

Aemond: No way

Aegon: it won't work

Daeron and the maid: hit it off

Aemond:

Aegon: *in tears* my apprentice has become the master. Impossible.

Helaena::)) I'm so glad we got to do this. A positive memory between us all

Helaena:((

Aemond: I will never understand women.

Helaena: so you guys still want to go to the whore house or not?

Aegon and aemond:*nearly choke on their drinks*

---

This is what brainrot looks like

#house of the dragon #aemond targaryen #aegon ii targaryen #helaena targaryen #shitpost about aemond #house of the dragon shitpost #daeron targaryen

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