#I could never live in a street like that

[healution]

You know those streets where everyone's house looks the exact same way? How do people know which one is theirs?

#p #i wouldn't know #I could never live in a street like that #I wouldn't find my own house

[avisisisis]

I know everyone likes to make fun of Ezra for believing Maul, but I honestly really liked that, because. Like. He's been working so hard to learn to trust people again. His new-found family is teaching him how to open up and how to let himself love others without being too afraid of losing them to connect

And he doesn't immediatly trust Maul, which shows that even if his trust issues are much better now, he's still not stupid and knows to be careful around strangers, especially if you found them inside a Sith Temple

But. Maul shows and tells him what he wants to see; he acts kind with him, reassures him when he's in doubt, and manipulates Ezra (who is a CHILD) into beliving in him so he could get what he wanted

Then he betrays him, and by blinding Kanan, he proves Ezra's 'little me' right

#i actually think it's beautiful how he still keeps trying even after having been hurt so many times #and it's not even about maul hurting him. it's about maul hurting kanan #like if maul hadn't done that then ezra would've been perfectly fine w having him as a slightly evil friend that his entire family hates #part of the reason why i love ezra is because bc even though he's been betrayed #he still works to be better #he still fights for what's right #still helps others. he can and will jump in the middle of the battlefield to save a stranger because that's who he is #and he always trusts his family to watch his back #he's been tempted by the dark side so many times and yet he's still “dark side? never heard of it” #and even when he DOES use the dark side. he gets better. he realices that what he's doing is wrong and GETS BETTER #ezra's world was violently taken away from him when he was only a child #he lived on the street for years with nothing but himself. he learned to never trust anyone and to always think for himself #he couldn't afford to help others (unless it wasn't TOO dangerous and he could get smth out of it) because he can't put himself in danger #he learns to forget his parents's beliefs #then the ghost crew comes along and they show him that world again #and now that he knows it he will never leave it again #star wars #star wars rebels #sw rebels #swr #ezra bridger #darth maul #star wars meta #sw meta #twilight of the apprentice #avis' post

[emperorofthedark]

Gunther Goth Elementary.

#sims 2 #ts2 #simblr #pleasantview #gunther goth elementary #based on one of the many elementary schools i attended #i didn't even like that school but we lived close enough that i could walk to it during off hours and have the playground all to myself #my favorite times were the early evenings when the weather was shit and it was at its most otherwordly #i still remember the eerie feeling that the world outside of the schoolgrounds had changed somehow #and that the familiar streets and houses would all be gone #and i'd never find the right way back

[spitblaze]

One day you will reach a point where someone will misgender you and instead of feeling the jab of disappointment or fear or mockery, you will only feel confusion or bewilderment or even just...nothing, whether you correct them or not. And you will realize how far you've come, and how resilient you've grown, how much comfortable you are in your own skin.

#spitblaze says things #i complain too much about transgender stuff. lets get some positivity going #anyway yadda yadda usual disclaimer. i cannot speak to everyones experiences or lives. im not psychic i dont know ur circumstances #i just know that reaching the point of some terf misgendering you to get a rise out of you will one day be less dehumanizing #and more like. annoying or pathetic #yeah thats great i will never be a man uh huh sure. u got any better material i dont have all day #or like someone will just...casually misgender you. you will be in the street and someone will 'sir' or 'maam' you wrong #and instead of stressing about what made them clock you you'll just be like 'what' #and if ur still in thr place where ur not sure if you will EVER be in a spot where itll be either chill or confusing #remember. cis people get misgendered too #men with long hair will get ma'amed. women with broad shoulders will get sir'd. #there are individual pieces of clothing that will make people gender you a certain way and you will not know why #ultimately there are a million things that could cause someone to clock you or anyone else incorrectly and its 1000000% subjective

[anotherpapercut]

literally so funny how internet leftists will be like "ummm actually using drugs is bad and evil and destroying society (I know bc the us govt and/or some random conspiracy theorist told me so 😌) and anyone who thinks we should end the stigma around drug use and try to make it safer for users is actually just trying to destroy America" but then they'll also turn right around and go "don't forget to take your meds!!! remember if you can't make your own dopamine store bought is fine ❤️. end the stigma around needing lifelong medication!!!"

like girl are you somehow laboring under the delusion that like xanax is safer and more effective at treating mental illness than LSD or ketamine or even like MDMA bc boy do I have some news for you

#this is us focused bc thats where i live and where i have encountered drug culture #i am sure similar or even the same dynamics exist elsewhere but since i dont know the nuances ill let them speak for themselves #like imagine thinking doctors are more trustworthy than ur average street dealer 😐 could NOT be me #dealers i know would never just prescribe incredibly dangerous drugs at dangerous doses on such a mass scale #that sanctions actually have to be placed on them which prevent them from PRESCRIBING MEDS TO PEOPLE #i just dont have the us medical system boot lodged inside my throat i guess #bitches will be like 'im really concerned about your weed intake' and not say a damn word abt my Klonopin which is FAR more dangerous #benzo withdrawals are no fucking joke. you can die if you do it wrong. the 'withdrawals' people report w weed are literally just like. #irritability and nausea. which in every person ive ever met was not actually withdrawals but just a result if them being stressed #bc they were no longer using weed to relax lmfao. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ whatever tho yall just keep on trustin Mr. Richard Nixon #anyway if ur depressed pop a molly. i have never felt happiness like molly happiness

[thoughts-of-the-unheard]

i like to think about george and lucy doing cases together as they lock lockwood in the house to force him to heal after being shot (and falling down the catafelque hole and battling a bunch of ghosts and fighting off a load of thugs)

#we know lockwood would insist on coming along #“this is my angency!” #“what happened to no secrets?” #“you know i have abandonment issues!” #they just make him some tea and tell him hell be fine #could also see george being like #yep never coming back alwadae #i hc that lockwood speaks french but ive got nothing for lucy #feel like she wouldnt get the chance to learn unless its from like the old lady that lives down the street and immigrated there in her 20s #anyway #lockwood and co #lockwood & co #l&co #lockwood #anthony lockwood #anthony john lockwood #anthony bloody lockwood #george casper karim #george karim #george cubbins #lucy carlyle

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#there's something really beautiful about experiencing the weather patterns of a new place #where i live now. its not like where i grew up. not like the foothills of Appalachia but its more familiar than the Chihuahuan desert was #when i go home to ohio everythings so green. so green. unimaginably green and the towns are in the woods. the hills roll #and trees billow deciduous and packed so tightly the treeline is like a wall of plant matter. here there are trees but they are tall and #evergreen. patchy in places like shrubs in the desert. the grass grows green but also pale tan and dead. houses are routed in valleys #between mountains. they're made of wood and not stucco but they still look strange and the landscape is crumpled together tall. and there's #water. it rains. days can be dreary and gray with drizzle. i forgot what thats like. when a single low stratus cloud blocks out thewhole sk #and fog clings to the trees. my school bus used to drive by a lake where thr fog was so thick i didnt kno how the driver could see the road #but somehow i forgot how much joy suspended water vapor gives me living in a place where when it rains it pours so hard the streets flood #and the greedy ground drinks the landscape dry. but there are new things as well. here smoke rolls up over thr mountains and gets stuck in #the valleys so that the weather forcast reads: Smoke for days on end. im used to tornado warnings and heat warnings and dust storm warnings #but ive never expected Smoke as a type of weather. and im sure there's more to experience. ive only been here like 3 weeks. its not as gree #as home. the storms dont seem to get quite so violent. the woods are so full of bears that its an active threat. but its not the desert #and while ill miss the shapes of desert plants and little lizards. when i look up at the pine and spruce trees i feel like i can breathe a #little easier. well see how i feel once the long cold winter sets in haha #but i dunno. part of me still longs for a violent thunderstorm. one where u can feel the temperature drop and u csn feel it building all da #one that bends the trees and smells like ozone. it was never like that in thr southwest and im not sure that happens here #but maybe thats just a desire for chaos and violence as a product of my pathological internal control. i cant be spontaneous so let nature #bring the fear to me. some of my favorite memories are watching lightning strikes #so it goes i suppose #unrelated #listen. is it fucked up to have ohio nostalgia? maybe so. but in my defense i grew up in the pretty part of ohio lol

[bleakbluejay]

if i was wealthy, i'd probably spend most of my money on charities and crowdfunding. but. something else i'd do, is whenever it was my birthday or christmas (and/or the holiday season in general), or thanksgiving, whatever, i would pay for my friends to fly or trainride to me and we could celebrate together at no cost of theirs. i would love to do that. provide them transportation, a cozy safe place to sleep, food. i'd pay for their pet to visit, too, or at least for high quality boarding/petsitting.

it seems these days everyone is so shattered and fragmented and alone. and if i could afford to, i'd try to remedy that with get-togethers. i love hosting parties and picnics. i love getting people together and seeing them be happy and loving and friendly to one another. i would try to make sure they know that, no matter what, no matter how alone they are, they have family in me, and potentially with the other people i offer my house to.

idk.

#eli talks #i used to fantasize about buying out an apartment complex or trailer park #and filling it with the people i know need a home #the people disowned by their parents. or without parents. #the people who can't work. the people who can't live alone. #they'd have their own privacy but friendship and love could be just down the hall #or across the street #of course this is coming from the guy that can't afford to feed themself #it's never gonna happen. but i like to imagine. #i'd love to be grandparent-core :3

[the-busy-ghost]

Petty rant this morning- I can understand that somtimes even the nicest noises can be a nuisance, even painful, and believe me I have become cranky about all sorts of innocuous noises at the wrong time.

That being said, I have heard a surprising number of people complain about bellringers practising, when they moved into a house next to a mediaeval English church

#Oh I'm sorry we'll just move this twelfth-century bell tower somewhere that doesn't irritate you #Can it sometimes be a rather awful cacophony? Yes but they only get better if they practise #And even the worst noise of bells (from the distance of neighbouring houses not the tower) is better than car engines and drunk arguments #And bellringing is such a magnificent piece of craft and tradition; it's worth preserving even above and beyond any religious role #Though to be fair all the bellringers I've met seem to hold bellringing as their chief religion and are indifferent at best to the church #So it's not even that much of a reminder of Christianity imo #Thouhg I suppose people could disagree #Anyway church bells were one of the best things about living in the south of England #Even when they were rattling away very untidily #I miss them so much being back in Scotland where we only have a handful of towers at best #and certainly don't have the longstanding tradition of ringing in small churches #I have to get my kicks from the Tolbooth clock and let me tell you it just isn't the same as hearing an English bell tower ringing up #Let alone actually ringing the changes #It's one of the few genuinely wholesome English traditions and you want to whine about the sound of BELLS #Not because it's a sensory issue or anything just because you don't like your lie-in being interrupted #But you'd expect your neighbours to put up with your noisy barbecues #Actually never even mind disruptive events like that- in my opinion the noise of your silly car idling in the driveway is worse than bells #You trying to fit your massive SUV down the tiny streets of a small English village #Is always worse than plain hunt

[bisaster-energy]

okay what you have to understand is that while against the kitchen floor is a dean song...willard! has cas written all over it

#guess who really started listening to will wood 😳 #like just listen to me ok hear me out... #i dont owe u my heart or my body but shit i do fuckin owe u and im so sorry that i cannot be good as u are #the irony of dean not thinking of himself as human as cas learned to be is not lost on me #and even tho he fucks up constantly he cant bring himself to want cas to end their relationship (wtv it may be) #apologizing for the way he is bc tbh if dean never figures out how he feels simply because he himself doesn't know #what he wants he probably would end up just giving cas.his body because he owes him something and #he cant figure out what he can possibly give in the face of that all consuming frankly terrifying love #ahem. onto willard #ik i said cas knows how to be human but that's in dean's eyes. cas doesn't get being human at all even tho he does (?) #like his homeless/steve arc he cant get a grasp on how humans do all the things they do and live they way they live #the beginning of the song he talks about not being able to step on ants and crying for moths #now that could be cas talking about actual insect but ALSO humans! bc he's learned to care!! #but yea if cas had some sort of animal he saw every now and then while on the street? a cat or a rat etc that's how i envision #him with this song #he himself has been stepped on so many times! it started to feel like his place! not truly part of the winchesters not truly angel #just cas now... #is there room for me in your cage whether that be earth or a real rat he feels he understands #it's confusing for him to connect! never learned what to feel from childhood like humans do! #he was thrown into the deep end #they call me crazy but their words all seem made up to me -> honeybee cas fr #also i can see steve bringing a little creature into the gas n sip his own little guy #also the peace vs freedom thing. animals are put in cages. humans locked in heaven. #and cas has achieved free will but he has to wrestle with whether it's better to be content or break chains #you might seem behind bars but friend this cage is inside out! dean and sam are trapped in this destiny #but they both say fuck it !! but heaven wasn't just a cage to humans it's a cage for angels too #yeah ur fate is fucked but at keast you had a fate to change yknow. cas didn't just change his story #he didn't have one so he literally wrote it #i can't listen to this song without thinking about cas human hungry and alone #it's AWFUL out here socrates. it's DANGEROUS out here socrates. it's lonely out here socrates 🤡🤡🤡

[endofbeginning]

Did i ever say anything on here abt the covid dorm thing i dont think i did. One day ill do a tell all... That shit was actually crazy like ah you cant be making sick kids do all that ....

#pushing an open cart of everything id need to live alone in an empty dorm for 10+ days across the raggedy streets of baltimore #alone in the cold rain. WITH COVID. then u get to the dorm building and theres stairs. no elevator. and then u drag the stuff u brought up #individually and get into the apt and theres another guy in one of the rooms who was NOT INFORMED ANOTHER PERSON WAS MOVING IN #like wow.. wow that was actually comically BAD.. and i could keep going... freezing water.. no bedsheets.. thankfully i brought a blanket #didnt pay attention to food allergens/requests when tehy managed to drop off food in the first place.. like Girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #mind u i shouldve never even gotten covid in the first place not that ANYBODY SHOULD!!! but i mean Logistically it made no sense #i was wearing a mask 100% of the time in my classes and never left my dorm if not for class. so. i have to laff🤣🤣

[brattybottomdyke]

i really want to get more tattoos and there’s a couple that i’ve been thinking about for a while but i just can’t find an artist 😭

any NYC mutuals have any recs? im not in the city but i could get there relatively easily and im really itching for another

#the artist who did my flowers on my shoulder is an hour and a half away and tried to cut my appointment short #i had booked for a 4 hour sesh and they tried to stop after like 2 hours bc they wanted to pack for a trip they were going on the next day #didn’t give me any warning just stopped tattooing and was like yeah this is a good spot to stop and i was like da fuq? #so i feel a little weird about going back plus the shop is a solid hour and a half away in bumblefuck #but all of my other tattoos are basically just from street shops i never developed a rapport with anyone #and it’s hard bc i like the american traditional style/neo trad style #and it’s very hard to be a queer woman and get those kind of tattoos in the area im in bc it’s pretty conservative #and i feel like im gonna get hate crimed or like…s*xually harrassed or something by all these old white dudes #fucking ink master has ruined me bc i fell in love with so many of the artists that have come through the show and they all live so far away #like states away #or in the fucking UK thank you freddie from this last season #i just wanna get more tattoos 😭 #i have the money for it finally #but i have no artist #and a lot of the people i do follow who are kind of local…they never post flash or anything #and like i just don’t think i’ve found someone i could vibe with idk #bottom.spm

[rainbluealoekitten]

i genuinely feel so bad for my ex's gf though because she's out here posting on her insta that it's their 3 month anniversary but boyo is making me playlists with unrequited love songs and posts stuff about being nostalgic about when we were dating, keeps complimenting how i look, and literally yesterday was telling me he still has the sticker we stole from the library where we held hands and cuddled like. he's such an important friend to me but really i guess i will have to cut him off (again) bc i thought we were both over this but apparently not and it's just going to hurt a lot of people if i don't

#also in all honesty i am scared that i will do something stupid without realising it or while in a not very lucid state #like once after we broke up i let him fall asleep on me around 4am then we watched the sun rise together until i finally left to find #my own bed #like i knew i shouldn't be doing that but i hadn't slept in over 24 hours and #he was so sad and so was i and i just needed someone but he just needed me. and we really did seem like we could but perfect #but yk what this relationship has taught me a lot and still does because to him? we should have been soulmates and i get why #i mean we read the same poetry and cry at the same music and he loves it when i infodump about greek mythology and i love it when he sends #pictures of his cats and our art is so desperate for another person to See Us and we danced in the rain once #and it was one of the most beautiful moments of my life #but it's never going to be right and idk he can't accept that i don't and never will and never have loved him. i'm sorry it seems perfect #but it's a good reflection moment for me too in all honesty yk #bc the boy i'm obsessed with also could have been someone fated for me i mean #what's the chance we live on the same street twice despite having travelled the world? #what's the chance he and i-both very private and solitary individuals-immediately felt we could confide in each other? #but apparently that doesn't mean shit to him #and idk maybe he's also just as sorry and as apologetic and maybe even a little #heartbroken over it #just like i am w my ex but. idk #i do not know #anyways once i get the motivation to write a full novel then it's over for everyone #until then you get my shitty journal musings #blue screams into the void

[thatswhatsushesaid]

Top fave foods?

ooops sorry anon i have no idea how i missed this?? okay let’s go:

shredded peking duck with scallions and hoisin sauce. used to enjoy them on the little pancakes you get from takeout places but alas, they are not gluten-free, and gluten hates me. also i can’t ever find any peking duck outside of the uk that tastes the same as it does at the place down the street from my uncle’s outside london. rip.

buttermilk biscuits + white sawmill gravy, which i also can only enjoy ever again if i find decent gluten-free recipes for them. actually just… just assume anything on this list that has gluten in it can only be enjoyed by me hypothetically. anyway this is objectively the tastiest delicacy from the deep south in the US, i’ll die on this hill.

pecan pie, as baked by my mother, who uses an ungodly amount of both sugar and butter. (i almost chose peach cobbler, god, this was hard.)

squash casserole, a comfort food from my childhood.

montreal-style bagels from st. viateur in quebec 🙌

#asks answered #honourable mention goes to the street kebab in oslo because i lived off of that shit for like 6 months when i was in my 20s #every now and then i get a craving for it that can never be satisfied #this is objectively the worst part of living in lots of different places and then finally putting down roots in one #kiss goodbye all the local foods you took for granted in all of the places you used to live #fuck how could i forget clotted cream on scones??? #god clotted cream my beloved

[byanyan]

me two years ago: byan has always been a little bastard. awful nasty child who intentionally used their big doe eyes to manipulate people

me now: byan used to be a soft baby who just wanted love and acceptance, who slowly became hardened and selfish in order to survive when they realized they'd never get what they needed

#'two years ago' I say like I wasn't still holding onto some of these headcanons at the beginning of this year #tbf a lot of the shift has come directly from translating them from their original setting into a more realistic modern one #original byan's setting was a lot more doom and gloom and a lot more pessimism and cruelty consistent across everyone within it #they grew up fully on the streets and taking care of themself so they learned from a VERY young age how to get what they wanted/needed #and felt no qualms bc like. literally everyone was just trying to survive however they could #so they kinda had to be nasty from the start #but NOW...... ironically I feel like their backstory is more tragic bc they're in this 'normal' world where people all around them #have things better than they do. people around them have everything they want and need and they just have to watch longingly #all while being told that lives like those of most of the kids around them are the norm #THEY'RE the outsider. THEY'RE the one who's not normal. #so growing up they actually try SO HARD to be what people want them to be while also trying to fight to be who they are #and it's just. never good enough. THEY'RE never good enough. #it really changes the entire vibe of the character (': #hi good morning don't mind me I'm just emotional over byan's development as a character over the last two and a half years #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ ooc ⋮ don’t @ me.

[gender-euphowrya]

i know our fatphobic cultures have deepfried and glassblown people's brains but it always boggles my mind when a fat person is fatphobic ??? what are you doing

#i mean like #your overweight aunt telling her daughter who's slimmer than her to lose weight #fat middle-aged women in the street making a face at a young fat girl in a crop top #people saying stuff like ''she could look so much better if...'' while being fatter than the person they're talking about #couples of equivalent sizes turning each other's weight into a punchline #like. this isn't something that makes my life any harder so as annoying as it is i don't feel the need to address it #but nobody in my family seems to get that I Do Not Care what weight i am #i've put on weight over the last year or so and when i say it's not an issue to me #my mom & grandma just act like... it should be ??? like i should be feeling awful and beating myself up over it ???? #shouldn't you be GLAD that i'm not ? that i'm not stuffing myself with celery and then puking it up ? #that i'm feeling comfortable ? that i'm not depressed over it ? that i think i look just fine ?? #meanwhile mom's way heavier than me and used to be even more before she had An Entire Surgery to lose weight #i mean. both my parents were fat. it's genetics. i'm never gonna be stick thin. i do not care ??? #i'm gonna look like harvey guillen jack black matt berry y'know ?? all men people find attractive ?? what's there to worry about #AND EVEN THEN. even if we lived in a nightmare world where people had shit taste and found them ugly #still wouldn't make it a problem ? idgaf what people think of my appearance ?? i'm vibing