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heich0e · 10 months

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Touya's not usually one to check his text messages.

Never has been, ever since he got his first cellphone when he was 13. He finds it more of a nuisance than anything, the way people always want to get ahold of him. Always expect a response from him over the most mundane shit. He barely likes talking to anyone as is, let alone during his private time—therefore, as a general rule, he doesn't respond to texts.

Especially not ones that pop up on his phone on a lazy Saturday afternoon with the contact name 'Bird Brain' listed as the sender.

But when these particular message previews appear, rudely interrupting him in the middle of watching a cake decorating video while he lays sprawled across the couch, Touya can't help but click through to the conversation to give them the response that they deserve.

His response is about as succinct and unamused as he is.

Three telltale dots appear at the bottom of the conversation before Touya can click away, and he finds himself waiting to see what Keigo comes back with—for reasons not even he quite understands.

Touya pushes himself up off the couch in an instant, stomping into your bedroom.

He finds himself hesitating once he makes it to the doorway, his body having moved relatively of its own accord, realizing only once he's standing at the threshold that he's not even really sure what he's going to say.

You're laying across the bottom of your bed on your tummy with your sock-clad feet lifted in the air behind you. You have one headphone in your ear and your laptop propped in front of you with that stupid romantic drama you like so much playing—the one Touya pretends he hates but always gets a little pouty when you watch an episode without him. You turn when you spot him in your peripheral vision, popping your headphone out of your ear and hitting the spacebar to pause your show.

"I'm almost done," you tell him, glancing back to your screen where the male lead is paused mid-confession—his mouth still open in the middle of his ardent monologue. You peer back at him again over your shoulder with a slightly smug look. "If you hadn't watched ahead without me we could be watching it together, y'know."

"That was an accident," Touya grumbles, sniffing a little indignantly. "It started playin' automatically when I turned the TV on."

"Sure, sure," you chirp, turning back to your laptop. When you realize Touya's still lingering there, you face him again, this time pushing yourself up on your elbow so you can twist around to look at him more fully. Your brow furrows. "What's wrong?"

Touya sucks in a breath of air and holds it in his cheeks, narrowing his eyes slightly.

"Can I see your phone for a sec?" he asks.

The pinch of your brow slackens as one of them lifts in surprise.

"Yeah," you say, though your tone is still a little wary. You nod towards your bedside table at the head of the bed. "It's plugged in."

Touya shuffles towards you, rounding the end of your bed frame and approaching the device in question. He sit down at the edge of the mattress, and it dips under his weight. Beside him, you shuffle a bit closer to him as you resume watching your show, one of your feet brushing gently against his back as you kick them idly back and forth.

Touya knows your passcode, just like you know his, so it's no effort to unlock the device once he has it in hand. Finding the app in question is another story entirely.

He turns to you.

"Which one of these is Instagram?" he asks, holding the device in front of your face with the home screen open.

You pause your show again.

"This one," you say, pointing to one particular app icon, but your voice is notably perplexed.

Touya's never had any interest in social media. He had a couple of accounts when he was a teenager but hasn't properly logged in for years. As new social networking sites have risen and fallen, he's never bothered to even sign up, seeing no need in signing away his personal data to a platform he'll never use anyway.

Touya taps his thumb against the icon that you pointed out, waiting for the application to launch. His leg jiggles impatiently while he waits for it to load.

Beside him, you don't unpause your show.

When the screen finally loads, Touya is immediately accosted by an unfamiliar interface. There's some photo of a girl he doesn't know taking up most of the screen, and a few bubbles in the upper right hand corner that he can only assume are notifications you haven't checked. Touya may not use social media, but he's not an idiot either, so after clicking around the screen for long enough he finally manages to pull up what he recognizes as your personal profile.

"Touya, what are you doing?" you ask, thoroughly bewildered now, having just watched your boyfriend visit just about every corner of the Instagram app.

He sucks in a sharp breath.

Slowly, he turns to look at you.

"Did you just post this?"

He doesn't really need to ask, considering the baggy t-shirt you're wearing in the photo—his t-shirt, he recognizes immediately—is the same one you currently have on as you lie stretched across your bed. It's all you have on, save for the frilly little socks on your feet and the edge of the panties he can see peeking out where your shirt's hem has ridden up.

The photo blessedly has left those out.

You clear your throat, almost like you're embarrassed, reaching out for your cellphone. "Yeah, a little while ago."

Touya holds the device out of your reach, and a little sound of indignation slips from your lips. He keeps scrolling.

Your profile is full of photos of you that are just as charming as the first one he'd seen. Some are of friends, or food, or places you've visited. Many are even of him, or the two of you together. The collection is like a series of little snapshots into your life—of all the moments you wanted to save or share. But every so often there will be a photo just of you.

You with your lips pursed coyly, or maybe quirked with the ghost of a smile. You wrapped in a skimpy little dress you bought for a special occasion that Touya is all too familiar with. You with your eyes bright, or maybe one where they're heavy lidded in a sultry expression that makes something possessive and primal scrape against Touya's ribs.

His face feels hot when he looks at those ones. Hotter still when he realizes other people have seen them too.

"I think you should delete your account," he says suddenly, turning to face you with a completely serious—and markedly insistent—expression.

"W-what? Touya!" You exclaim plaintively. You push yourself up onto your knees and scrabble for your phone. Touya doesn't fight back to any real degree. He lets you crawl into his lap and wrestle it out of his hands, though the two of you do go tumbling back across the bed in the process. Once you've safely tossed the phone down to the other end of the bed out of his reach, you turn back to him with an irritated pinch to your features.

Touya meets your gaze easily, like a man without guilt.

"What's gotten into you?" you ask him softly, still straddling his lap. Your hands rest over his sternum, fiddling idly with the strings of his hoodie.

Touya sighs, reaching up and tugging you down to his chest before snaking his arms around your waist to keep you pressed against him. You don't try and wiggle out of his grip like he thinks that you might, instead you let him hold you, nuzzling your face into the collar of his sweatshirt.

"You're being weird," you mumble.

"No, weird would be me asking you to throw your phone away and never leave the house again so I'm the only one who gets to look at you," Touya replies, his fingers dipping under the hem of your—his—shirt and creeping up along your spine. "I'm actually being pretty normal, all things considered."

You huff out a little laugh and Touya feels the warmth of it break against the skin of his throat. You lift your face so you can look at him, and Touya admires the view of you from so close up. The curve of your lips, the colour of your eyes, the tip of your nose. He could look at you all day, he realizes then. Every part of you. Every inch and dip and curve that makes you up. He could study them. Map them out with his eyes closed, long committed to memory.

You make him feel kind of insane, sometimes. More insane than usual, anyway. He worries that he likes you too much.

"What are you thinking about?" you ask him quietly.

You.

Touya purses his lips.

It wasn't his intended goal, but he's happy to accept the little kiss you press against them anyway, a laugh slipping out of his mouth and into yours before you pull away. He shuts his eyes, letting his head tip back against the bed again, letting out a long, exhausted breath.

"Wanna help me set up an instagram account?" he finally mutters after a long stretch of silence.

You push yourself up overtop of him, and when he cracks one eye open he finds you looking down at him excitedly.

"Really?" you ask him incredulously, but undeniably pleased by the prospect.

He nods a bit, pulling you back down against his chest. He lets his eyes shut once more.

If deleting your account is out of the question, he might as well have his own so at least he gets to admire it.

You wiggle comfortably in Touya's hold, your TV show long forgotten at the other end of the bed, content to just let your boyfriend trace lazy circles into your thigh as your legs tangle together with his.

Touya's eyes pop open again suddenly, an unpleasant and not-so distant memory rushing back to him.

Your gaze meets his own, a quiet concern swimming behind it.

He takes your face in his hand.

"How do you block someone on Instagram?"

#touya x reader #todoroki touya x reader #dabi x reader #touya todoroki x reader #bnha drabble #bnha writing #writing

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realdirtfacts · 7 months

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Selling your merch and shipping from home with Fourthwall

I've been selling @shiftythrifting Junk Boxes - our curated secondhand mystery boxes - since 2017 using different platforms with different levels of success. I moved to Fourthwall in 2022 and my teeny tiny business has only grown since then! FW is free to use and you get ALL the money from your home sales save for the credit card processing fees. I don't miss the fee structure from our previous hosts, so I thought I'd write up a little guide on how easy it is to get started.

Things you need to start shipping from home:

A scale, and it doesn't need to be an expensive or large one! Even a kitchen scale works for small stuff.

Packaging and packing materials for the product(s) you're selling.

Access to a post office and/or a printer.

Funds set aside for postage. You'll get this money back with your Fourthwall payout when the month rolls over.

(Optional but handy) A ShipStation account.

Make yourself a store if you haven't already. You can sell print on demand, digital stuff, and your own inventory in one place but today we're talking about selling from home, so add a product and pick the middle option.

You can customize everything about your product on this page, from adding size and color variations, the materials used to make it, size charts, inventory, and more. Get an accurate weight of what you're selling in its packaging and add that here. Hit save and you have your first listing. Gonna be selling a variety of products? You can duplicate the listing with the meatball menu! Change the name, photos, and anything else that needs changing and have your second listing up in a couple minutes.

Didi protip: I like to put people's reviews right in the listing. Lots of photos help sell your product, but there's nothing like a positive review from fans!

Fourthwall's Collections feature lets me put my Junk Boxes in their own little section where I can set them to hidden or mark them sold out if I get sick or am on vacation. This lets me easily turn the self-fulfilled part of my store off while folks can still purchase print on demand and digital stuff and sign up for memberships.

Didi protip: If you are in the US, the US postal service will pick up your outgoing packages free of charge on any regular mail day. Just set up a pickup on USPS.com!

When you've made your first sale, you can either make the label yourself or connect directly to ShipStation through Fourthwall's app integration. That's brand new and I love it so far. My labels pop up in ShipStation about 24 hours after a purchase, giving people a little window of time to adjust their order or make changes before I ship it.

At that point, all that's left is handing it off to the postal carrier of your choice! Boom, you're done!

A final note from me, I moved ShopShifty to Fourthwall so I could have one address for ALL my merch instead of splitting it between Patreon, a print-on-demand store, and the Junk Box store. It's proven to be the best choice I've made in years and has saved me a ton of money in marketplace fees, Paypal's cut, and web hosting charges. This has genuinely been the easiest way to sell my merch!

#fourthwall #I wouldn't praise anything like this that I didn't absolutely love #and I love fw #I'm proud our lil shifty made partner #now I help other people set their stores up

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darkbluekies · 1 year

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Silas asks #6

Previous one Concept: I've put multiple asks into one post to avoid too much loose posts on my account! This way, you have more to read too<3 Warnings: bruises, unhealthy relationships, mentions of marking silas up

What if I made silas a angry steak with vinegar 😡ok that sounded werid but here's the angry steak recipe 😂vinagear sauce, microwave that steak

He'll make sure all of your meals are cooked in dishwater.

What if after the "basement session" Silas find out that now the little thing has a really strong self harm tendencies? Like she start to bite herself, physical abuse herself and not only that! She start to call herself "dirty" (or smt) and her self esteem start to go down very fast. Is Silas will help s/o with it or he'll like it? Hope not the second option <;;:(

Of course he'll hate it :( he doesn't like when you're hurt, hence why he uses the basement as a punishment and not something physical. He hates to see painful marks on your body. He loves to see you painted in bruises, but not the ones that hurt. He'll make sure to tell you how beautiful and worthy you are so make sure that you know how much you mean to him. He'll dress you up in soft, fluffy clothes until you look like a marshmallow to make sure you won't hurt yourself.

"Come here, little thing, fuck, I love you so much. Please don't think like that. You know I don't want you to be hurt. I'll make sure you get well, I'll even call a doctor if you want ... I'll do anything to make sure you're happy, okay? Tell me what to do."

I was re reading your Valentine’s Day post with and I was wondering if he would be the type of yandere to buy his darling lots of clothes and made her spend hours trying them on in front of him? Ps you’re my favourite blog on this app, your writing is amazing and I’m always excited for your next post

[I did two valentines, but I'm guessing that you mean Silas? Thank you so much, btw that makes me so happy <3]

Of course he's the type to make you into his personal little runway model. He'll sit back in a chair and watch with dark eyes, loving everyhting you put on.

"And spin ... good job. I like that one. We'll get that one. What do you mean 'it's short'? It's supposed to be. I'm the only one who will see it anyway, so why does it matter? Try next one. I'm enjoying this."

Hey how are you? I just came back from school and was watching in the gym and saw some kids practicing taekwondo, so I was wondering how would Silas react to his darling knowing taekwondo and can be his ass? Would he be amused or frustrated I just wanted to know cuz I kept thinking about it for about an hour before saying it now. I hope you had a good day :) -new anon

[I'm doing good, thank you!!]

He'd be both frustrated and amused. He would be able to playfight with you and not have to worry about you hurting yourself, but he'd be worried that you would be able to escape him easier now. If you weren't showing any signs of running away, he'd not think much about it and would enjoy getting lessons from you. If you could teach him how to be as good as you, he'd be able to protect himself and you better.

"Like this? No? Y/N, seriously, teach me. Stop playing around."

How would Silas react to a reader with a bad light sensitivity disorder? Like irlen syndrome? I have it and it realy makes me feel isalated as no one elce i have met has had it in eny form (and i have move a LOT) if u dont want to do that what about an s/o who has dislexia? (As u can probarly gess i have that to. Life is so cruel 🥲)

Whatever problem you might be facing, whether it be physical or mental, he will be there for you. If you feel that it's hard to use your eyes, he will go to every doctor to try to find some kind of glasses to help you and if there are none, he'll be your eyes. The same with spelling and reading. He'll do everything for you. You don't have to lift a pretty finger :)

I would've spent all of babygirl silas money the first day tbh

my eye is twitching at that nicknAME

Hii I just read white bunny and I thought it was so good! It got me thinking about whether Silas would carry on treating the reader gently if they improved mentally or if he would go back to the way he was treating them before they ran away?

He would continue to treat them like he is. He's terrified of hurting you again and since you seem so happy when he treats you like this ... then he'll continue. Whatever you want, he'll do for you, don't worry about it. He's here for you ... always.

Hear. me. out.What if darling (s/o? Still don't know difference) ENJOY being in a basement (I am talking about Silas by the way) I mean, they (sorry i forget if s/o (darling) has a gender) think it's something like a minute just for them. No talking, no these annoying "baby" or "little thing", no forced touching. Just you ...and cold floor.

He'll be so pissed and change his tactics. You're not supposed to like his punishments! So you like the dark and quiet? No more of that. He'll be cuffing you two together and talking to you nonstop about how perfect you are and how he's going to keep you for as long as he wants to, aka really getting into your head.

I kinda want to bite Silas, he seem so chewy and acidic, green sour patch kid, especially his cheek, let me bite Silas, I need to bite Silas-

I mean ... he'd 100% like it so go ahead, leave some marks while you're at it.

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere drabbles #yandere imagines #yandere fics #yandere mafia #yandere oc x you #yandere scenarios #yandere asks

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luz-noceda-for-realsies · 1 month

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This is just my opinion btw, it could be a horrible stance to take idk lemme know if it is

Okay so I understand that some celebrities are in certain positions and have contracts with certain company so they can't talk about the stuff with Palestine or they lose their jobs. That's fucked up as hell but in this economy I understand (and that's also another conversation for another time how certain companies won't let their employees talk about a literal genocide openly or they lose their jobs. Like wtf) BUT then those celebrities shouldn't say anything at all. Because if they do say something about the situation they're gonna say something like how they're neutral or even vaguely or directly say that they support Israel's actions.

And news flash, even taking a neutral stance on this whole thing is less helpful than just staying silent. If you can't talk about it, don't talk about it. Don't say anything. Keep your mouth shut. There are just some situations where if you can't say anything, then DON'T SAY ANYTHING. Because trust me, there are plenty of other people who will scream about this situation until they lose their voice. Will make content about it until that's all they're known for. My whole point is that we can't rely on celebrities and well-known people in this situation to talk about this. We shouldn't rely on them in these situations anymore. This post isn't "all celebrities bad" cause I straight up don't think that's true. This post also isn't "give celebrities a break" because I don't care. This post is that anyone who CAN talk about this horrific genocide should be! As much as they can! Even if you just make posts about it that's better than nothing!

I've seen a lot of people rely on well-known public figures to do something about this, but they either CAN'T or WON'T. So it's up to us. The kids and adults and senior citizens on the internet with silly little accounts on silly little apps. And we've already started and have been doing a great job! Go onto any app and look up "Palestine" and you will see THOUSANDS of videos or posts from well-informed adults educating people on the history on this situation to 5 year olds attending protests with a sign in their hands and a watermelon painted on their faces. We can't rely on celebrities anymore. And a lot of us can't even rely on our governments anymore! So it's up to us. Just because you don't have a million followers or haven't starred in a Netflix show doesn't mean you don't have a voice! It doesn't mean you can't do something! Speak up! Donate! Boycott! Go to protests! Make posters and hang them around your neighborhood or something! Make art! Even if you can't do much, which is totally fine btw, do whatever you can! Because you CAN do something. We can't rely on public figures to be our voice anymore, we have to be our own voice.

Like yes, there's a lot of history of completely normal people standing up against injustice but I'm talking about today. How people are relying on public figures and celebrities today. Let's not do that anymore and let's do something ourselves. And almost everyone has a phone nowadays and almost everyone has access to social media. If you're reading this, you probably have access to social media. Use that to your advantage. We've got this guys! We can do this! I know we can! I believe in us.

Side note but if there are celebrities that are taking a neutral stance on this or even openly supporting Israel, as long as they aren't actively causing harm or spreading misinformation about Palestine, then don't focus on them. Don't waste your energy. Stop supporting them, talk about it once, twice, maybe even three times, and then leave them alone and focus on the active genocide going on in Palestine. Those celebrities aren't worth your time, the people in Palestine are. We can't let this genocide just happen right in front of us.

This all also applies to the situations going on in Congo, Sudan, and Haiti. But I'm just specifically talking about Palestine cause that's what this applies to the most. I'll talk about Congo, Sudan, and Haiti as well soon.

#i fully believe that all of us silly little guys on the internet can do enough to help put an end to this genocide #and also I'm not saying doing the bare minimum once and then not doing anything else again #im saying to do as much as you can as often as you can #don't forget that this is happening #free sudan #free congo #free palestine #free gaza #palenstine #palestine genocide

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incarnateirony · 1 year

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A conversation I'm having with a very quiet friend none of you would know made me realize I should probably re-collect my statements about Gotham Knights, with everything going on, so people can have a full and realistic understanding of the picture, rather than piece by piece updates:

GK's marketing numbers are really good, basically should perform about like TW, especially in-app and digitals. This is a great sign.

However, there's a lot of shit going on at DC

and a lot of shit going on at WB

and a lot of shit going on with hollywood writing rooms.

#4 is making studios expedite their decisions on what to cull or cancel, and gauging which shows are more likely to be impacted by it, like new shows and first year shows

This is why there's also no pilots on the Nexstar lineup this year even for low cost sitcoms or dramas, because they still need writers for anything scripted.

That's a lot going on. I've made no qualms in being very clear that I have zero ears inside DC and the best I can do is follow around leakers that do, and even THEY have hit or miss accuracy. SPN's general production security is laughably low compared to the labyrinthian ways DC obscures its shit, and changes it on the fly like the eldritch bunker.

So on a numbers front, if it was only numbers, and we just could air on time to show those numbers, I'd be 100% confident they'd just renew us probably as or before it airs to be honest, for a year two. But all those other points show up afterward and you're left staring at a mess.

So I don't want anyone 100% confident about GK to be disappointed. 100% confidence is on numbers and performance, but doesn't account for the great wild expanses of DC and strikes fucking its shit up bad.

#gotham knights

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saintrocklee · 2 years

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Hiii can I have ❛ do you think i’d let anything happen to you? ❜ with kakuzu pls 🙆🏻‍♀️

💰 kakuzu x reader 💰 supernatural (ish) AU part one | part two | part three warnings: again, nothing crazy. mentions of an abusive relationship, kakuzu being a creep and cranky and kinda mean but that’s why we like him.

this is part two of my kakuzu prompt series. i recommend reading part one (linked above) before indulging.

you'd expected something to change, after making the deal with kakuzu. something to feel different, to alter in your life - but nothing happens. there were warnings, about how dealing with demons could affect you - make you feel heavier. darker. but nothing happens.

except for what he promised.

the threatening messages from your ex stop immediately. you are no longer followed, your phone isn't blown up by strange unsaved numbers, your bank account goes untouched. it happens in an instant - you wake the next morning, the dread of what you'll find suffocating you, but when you finally leave your bed and check your cell - there's nothing.

it takes you a few months, to get used to the quiet. the nightmares are ever present, the paranoia sticks to you like a brand - but days turns into weeks into months and there's ... nothing.

the relief that hits you one day is blinding.

you move, finally saving up enough to cross state lines and end up in a studio apartment; cheap and old but yours. you find a job and you start out quiet, the urge to make friends and build relationships buried under the age old habit of avoiding people - but after time you make a friend. and then two. and soon, you have a social life.

a job, an apartment, and friends. it's hard - to juggle it all. you've never had so much before; you've never had to deal with bills, deal with talking to people, and balancing out everything. you make mistakes and get frustrated and cry and get angry - but there's never any punishment that comes with it. you're free to do what you please, make mistakes, and while that alone is confusing - when have you ever been able to do what you want? - it's exhilarating.

you think about kakuzu every day.

your monster. your savior. your ... something.

you tried googling him, funnily enough. he wasn't a demon - not the kind you had spent months preparing for. "human hearts" and "magic thread" quickly took over your search history, but you always came up blank.

you had no idea what he was, or why he dealt in hearts - not souls.

and then one night you're wine drunk, scrolling on your busted up laptop, snorting to yourself while an old episode of the office plays in the background.

"you're probably laughing at me, huh?"

silence meets you, save for the sound of your tv, but it doesn't bother you. he never talked back when you spoke to him in strange moments like these. he probably never heard you, no doubt hanging out wherever he lived ... far away from you. from earth, even.

was he a god? you’d never been religious but unexplained things happened all of the time and you always believed in the supernatural. spirits and the like. strange legends always fascinated you but in all of your research you couldn’t find a single piece of information that matched your devil. your monster.

who now had claim on your heart.

you’re certain it’s not romantic - so he must need it for something. to eat, maybe? he needed consent for it, had to wait for you to sign the dotted line … maybe he drew power from it. a monster who needed human hearts to live.

there had to be some irony there.

you fall asleep after awhile, head cocked awkwardly against your couch, empty wine bottle on your coffee table. your laptop is on the floor, next to an empty bowl of popcorn - and your tv plays on, filling your living room with sound. you couldn't fall asleep to silence anymore, silence invited trouble and cast a sense of dread around you, and the wine in your system lulls you into a deep sleep. you're dead to the world, chest rising and falling peacefully, when kakuzu appears, eyes trailing over your form. he takes in the alcohol, the junk food, and curls his lip.

idiot girl, he thinks to himself. you thought him to be long gone, no doubt just waiting for you to die so he could collect what was his and discard the rest of you.

humans were truly ignorant.

you belonged to him, now. you wouldn’t be rid of him so easily. taking care of his half of the contract had been easy - and now he was tied to you, until you expired. you gave him access to Earth, to roam amongst the humans - and he’d gotten bored of all of it immediately.

he was minutely amused, that you desperately tried to find out what he was. there were no books about him, no mention of him in history. he hadn’t been to Earth in centuries and he never interacted with mortals.

the exceptions to his rule beat a steady rhythm in his chest, his five hearts once again syncing up to beat in time with yours. five hearts, five humans, five contracts.

and now, six.

he’d never admit it, but he’s excited by you.

hearts were a powerful thing, in more ways than one. souls were flashy, and gave their controller power, but only in short bursts. souls were only useful in quantity, and kakuzu had no need for fleeting power.

but a heart? a human heart, given away with consent? more powerful, more useful than a thousand souls.

he was agitated though. he thought you would expire quickly, like the humans before you, but Earth had changed and now he finds himself waiting.

he found, to his dismay, that humans lived longer now. no more rampant plague and disease to wipe you out, and you lived in a relatively safe area, no threat of war looming over you. he was certain you’d have a good chance of living until you were old and wrinkling.

it’s annoying, how he has to wait for you to die naturally.

kakuzu watches you sleep, unable to block out the beating of your heart. it’s an enchanting tempo - the way it calls to him. his own hearts mix with yours easily and he finds himself standing there, longer than he meant to, just letting the rhythm lull him into a trance.

his eyes dance across your chest, your neck, landing on your pulse point - watching it beat steadily. he feels his threads pull towards you, and straightens - the sudden need to leave gripping him violently. he turns, casting one last glance behind him, before disappearing.

life goes on and two years later you find yourself ... content. not happy per say, the rampant paranoia and anxiety still crippled you at times - coupled with your PTSD. you’d found a therapist though, a lovely woman who was helping you build confidence and create coping mechanisms. you had friends, just a couple, and you were promoted - now earning more money than you ever had. it’s not a lot, but it’s still all yours, and you’re ... content.

you think about your monster everyday.

he didn’t consume your thoughts anymore, but his name would flit across your memory and you’d be thrown back to that night in the woods. you also talked to him daily, when you were alone. it was cathartic, it made him feel real, and you were positive your words fell on deaf ears.

until one day they didn’t.

you were on your balcony, watering your plants - your boombox on low as you mouthed along to some song on the radio. being surrounded by so much green had you thinking of kakuzu and his eyes and you smile to yourself.

“i wonder - will it be you that kills me or do you have to wait until i’m dead, to come collect my heart.” you murmur out loud. it had been a question on your mind for the better part of a week now. you wished you had some clarity, that night in the woods, to ask these questions.

“i will come just as you draw your last breath, girl.”

you spin, nearly knocking over the plants you were caring for, inhaling a gasp to scream. it lodges itself in your throat, and you shudder a panicked breath when you see him, standing inside of your apartment, just on the other side of your open sliding door.

he looked the exact same, tall and huge, and it’s funny - he barely fits in your living room. his eyes, so bright and green, track your movements - landing to watch your chest as it stutters. his voice was still so low, so dark, and you blink in surprise.

“what are you -” you start, and swallow when his gaze reaches to meet yours, agitation clearly resting on his shoulders.

“you asked.” he drawled, and realization hits you.

“you ... you heard me?” you ask, and kakuzu grunts.

“every damn day, girl. you and your incessant questions.”

oh.

there’s a lick of embarrassment at your heels but you straighten your spine.

“i didn’t know.” you reply and he says nothing in return, gaze fixed on you unblinkingly. it’s silent between the two of you before you feel the urge to speak again, unable to handle the crackling energy in the air.

“can i ... ask more questions?”

again, you receive nothing. it’s starting to get uncomfortable, but you realize that this might be his way of accepting you. he was ... something - a god a devil a demon - he could leave, if he wanted. he could silence you, if he wanted.

so you sit in the small metal chair on your balcony, and you ask your questions. he rewards you with shortly worded answers that have you fighting a smile.

“how old are you?” “old.”

“where do you live?” “elsewhere.”

“why human hearts?” “i enjoy them.”

“how can you hear me?” “i hear many things.”

“do you make deals with humans a lot?” “i do not make deals.”

“fine. contracts.” “no.”

“why me, then?”

he pauses at this and you straighten in your seat, nerves suddenly tingling. he’d avoided giving you any real answers, replying back easily, but this question stumped him. you think you might get something tangible out of him but then -

“maybe next time, girl.”

and with that - he was gone. you blink at the empty space in front of you and smile.

next time.

a few weeks later you find yourself walking back from the small market around the corner - mindlessly scrolling through your phone. some of your friends from work wanted to get together when they got off and you were thinking about going. you wait for the crosswalk sign to turn green and start to cross the street, head bowing to look at your phone again - when suddenly you hear screaming.

you look up and see a woman pointing at you, screaming for you to move, and then you see it - out of the corner of your eye. a car, clearly out of control, was careening toward you -

and you freeze.

the headlights are almost blinding and you tense your body, ready for the impact, when something thin and strong wraps around your waist and tugs - ripping you from your position and carelessly throwing you onto the sidewalk. the car crashes into a pole and you can see the driver was knocked out, or dead, causing the car to spin out of control. people start to run over, and you open your mouth to say something - when you feel the same chord around your waist, tugging at you impatiently.

you look down and see thread. long, black thread.

you blink in shock.

“get up.” a voice snaps behind you, lodging itself at the base of your spine and making you stand clumsily. you try to turn, to confirm what you’re hearing with your eyes, but you’re pulled back - this time by an arm. it’s large and heavy and you let yourself be manhandled, still in shock. you’re walked backwards into an alley and find yourself pushed against brick - kakuzu looming over you. your hands are pressed into his chest awkwardly and you can feel your heartbeat pulsing frantically in your ears, making you dizzy.

“how did you -” you try but you’re cut off when he pushes his face closer to yours. he’s still covered, so you only have his eyes to look at - and the intense way he’s regarding you has your tummy twisting with knots.

he was angry.

“stupid little girl.” he snarls and you blink.

“i don’t -”

“you could have been killed.”

your brain stops and you inhale sharply.

“isn’t that the goal?” you whisper back, body trembling from the adrenaline, and kakuzu makes an inhuman noise that sends shivers down your spine. you’re still oddly not afraid of him - just confused. and once again, grateful. he’d saved your life ... for some reason.

“i will not have you damaged.” he growls, and you finally notice that he’s got his arms on either side of your head, trapping you against the wall. they’re uncovered and huge, muscles bulging around you - and you see stitches - holding his flesh together. the threads, you realize - the same ones that had pulled you from the street.

what was he?

“i didn’t know it mattered.” you respond and there’s another growl. this one you feel under your palms, from where your hands meet his chest. he’s covered in that cloak of his and you can tell it’s thick but - you can feel something, just underneath it. your gaze travels down, as you watch your hands twitch against him.

“idiot girl, you belong to me. do you think i’d let anything happen to you?”

the breath that leaves you is sharp, painful, and you flex your hands at his tone. there - you felt it again. you push harder into his cloak, emboldened by his words and the fact that he pulled you from the street. you would have been killed and he’d have your heart and it would all be over ... but it wasn’t.

thump.

you freeze and your head snaps up - meeting his cool gaze.

thump.

“you have a heart.” you whisper, and he pushes off the wall, away from you. you sag against the brick, the rough edges cutting into your skin and grounding you. he stares down at you for a moment before speaking, making your knees weak.

“i possess five.”

your mouth parts, wanting to ask more questions, but you’re silenced when thick thread comes to press against your mouth. it’s strong, resting in the middle of your lips and pressing down, silencing you completely.

“you will do well to remember this, girl. your death will come when it is time, not a moment before. and when that moment comes, i will be there to collect what is owed to me. until then - you will remain untouched.”

you blink, mind turning. you didn’t remember any of this in the contract, there was no mention of him saving you or preserving you, but you can’t argue. the thread against your mouth is unrelenting and you freeze when you feel another strand, curling around your neck. it was loose, soft, and rested against your pulse point.

you both stood in silence until you nodded, and something flashed across kakuzu’s eyes. he pulls his thread back and you inhale a breath, wanting to know more, but he was gone in an instant - leaving you alone and shaking - his words on a repeated loop in your brain.

#oooof this was kinda hard #kakuzu x reader #kakuzu x you #kakuzu prompts #only one more part to go whaaat?!#he’s so grouchy lmaoooo we love you grumpy old man!!

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saw5 · 9 months

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how does one get into baseball. can you just start watching a random thing or should you try to start at the beginning of a season or like. hows that work

here was my process

have boyfriend who loves baseball (this is truly not an essential step bc i went a year and a half of our relationship before making any active moves towards getting into baseball but having someone in your life who loves it DOES help)

read The Echoing Green by joshua prager, a book chronicling a sign-stealing (cheating) scandal that led to and marred one of those home runs informally monikered The Shot Heard Round the World bc of its impact on baseball fans during a time when baseball was still really popular in the usa. the book was written by a journalist who is an avid baseball fan, so it's FULL of statistical information, technical terminology, humanity, and deep, elegant, funny, sad, joyful insights into the role of the sport within people's minds and american (and global) culture. it's additionally about the giants and dodgers, bf's team and bf's team's eternal rivals

look up a lot of definitions and explanations while reading that book, start to become enamored with the weirdness of the game

download the mlb app, make an account, and use it to listen to radio broadcasts of giants games, because the app aggregates the radio stations for every team and broadcasts them almost-live for every game, for free

have switch flipped in your brain for you after your first time listening to a complete game on the radio

listen to at least part of every one of your team's games since then except all-stars bc you were on a plane

you don't have to start at the beginning of a season, and a random thing is totally fine! honestly i recommend the live radio steps of my method bc they were hugely accessible and following what's happening with a team in the present day makes things pretty exciting and engaging. (baseball has also been broadcast on the radio for a very long time so it's a cool way to engage with history.) there are also livestreaming piracy sites for sports including one that has had video streams of every baseball game i've wanted to watch rather than listen to .... i can share the url privately if u want. the mlb app/mlb.com also does a Free Game of the Day every day, where the video stream of one game will be free! also there are lots of full games on youtube, and old radio games on archive.org.

i can't in good faith recommend like, reading a long book and going on wikipedia deep dives trying to piece things together and teaching yourself stuff as an entry method for everyone since that's not .... fun, for everyone, but it did a lot towards getting me into the game in a way that exposed me to some of its most interesting elements right from the getgo, so (shrugs). (and it was fun for ME!! hehe) i also sort of had a team picked out for me going in, which helped -- like i totally could've gotten into another but i'd heard about the giants from mar, and about some interesting parts of their character as a team and their history, and for several reasons they on their own were appealing to me so while i listen to a broadcast from other teams now and then i was locked in from the start. which fast tracked me towards caring about specific players, eras, moments. plus, alaska doesn't have a baseball team

re: the season -- the way baseball works is for most of the season every team is playing every other team, more or less, in series of 2-4 games. during this period everything is just hammering out division standings. tournament-stuff starts happening during the postseason (starts october i think?) so that's when jumping in in the middle might get confusing. even then tho u would probably be fine. games happen like, often every day and sometimes twice a day, with occasional rest days

thank u for asking me this this was fun :D feel free to ask me to clarify anything

#ask #urticating

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furbyfubar · 7 months

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You know how everyone agrees that the Internet has turned to shit?

Well, at least almost everyone who was around when the web was young agrees on it. This isn't a post to just bitch about the enshittification of everything online. No, this is a post to tell you what you can do to fight it!

But first let me just quickly sum up what the problem is:

The issue is mainly that the Internet and the World Wide Web went from being this cool thing where you could find almost everything to being the place people to use the same dozen or so apps, and to use those apps increasingly shitty desktop versions if they're on their computer. And any other sites you find with Google are more and more likely to be AI-generated bullshit listicles with well-made SEO that only exist to show ads.

Don't get me wrong, there are content creators on those dozen apps/sites who are still putting out amazing things! But since they don't control the platforms they're posting to they don't really fully own their own content. This is especially true since those platforms will of course make it as difficult as they legally can to move the content off of their services. Services that can and will change their terms of service to be increasingly shittier for their users the more of a hold on the market they get.

Then when the apps get shitty enough to not gain new users and thus eventually die, all those amazing things their users have created there either dies a slow death of obscurity, or the servers shut down and the content is gone for good.

So what can you do to fight this? You can be the change you want to see! So what should you do? Two things:

1. Set up a linktree and/or mailing list

The easiest way is to set up a Linktree account to link all your social media together (without taking up too much space in your bio). That way someone who wants to stop using a specific app/site at least know where else they can find you. But this doesn't help you all that much should your main social media suddenly shut down or bad your account. The best protection then is to use some free service to set up a newsletter/mailing list that you can plug to your followers. Then the people who want to sign up for it won't have to rely on noticing that you've stopped posting to find out your account has been banned. You don't have to use this mailing list to start sending out a periodical newsletter. It's OK to say "This is a backup mailing list that will send updates should I no longer be able to post where you usually follow me."

Bonus advice to protect yourself from losing touch with content creators you like following: Make a new bookmark folder called "Linktrees" and make a habit of bookmarking the Linktree (or equivalent) pages of people you follow. If you realize that someone has stopped posting you now have a place where you can check to see if they are still posting in other places (or under other usernames).

2. Set up your own website

This is typically not entirely free, and I'm not saying it's low effort. But if enough people do it, it will make a change to how the Internet works!

How? I promise you it's still easier than you probably think! Especially if you remember that the issue you're trying to solve here is that the web is lacking personal sites where people like you post things they burn for. That means that your site doesn't have to look good. Content is still king!

Learn some basic HTML and make a web page where you can post whatever content you want. That web page can then link to the other web pages you make. Do that and, congratulations, you've now made a website!

OK, so you've made a website that can only be loaded from your own hard drive, so maybe don't celebrate just yet. The next step is to sign up for a some web hosting service that lets you post anything that's legal for them to host. There are still free web hosts that survive by adding ads to your site, but if you can afford it I would advice you to find a cheap service that doesn't do this. If you only intend to host HTML and images so you don't need database support this still isn't all that expensive given that you're not likely to hit even the lowest bandwidth limit.

Next register a domain name. Make sure you have auto-payment set up for its renewal, and set a yearly alarm in your phone to make sure you don't lose the domain name due to forgetting about checking you e-mail at the wrong time. (Domain squatting trolls who register the domains that expire to either show phishing scams OR sell back the domain name to the original owner at an obscene markup are still sadly a thing.)

What should you use you website for?

Whatever the hell you want! If you're already a content creator I'm not even saying that you should stop posting to the apps you have followers on, but this gives you a way to post the same content to a platform that you control should something happen to your app of choice. Keep posting your photos, fanfiction or whatever content you make to the services you usually do, but now also upload them you your own website!

If you're making video you can still host if from YouTube (or Vimeo or whatever) so that you don't run into bandwidth issues. YouTube isn't likely to shut down out of nowhere, but they might start showing so many unblockable ads that you no longer want to have that be the main place your videos are hosted. But if you embed those videos on your own site and (vitally) make sure that you keep the raw video files backed up, you now have a way to change where your videos are hosted!

#enshiffification #enshitification #content creation #be the change you want to see #the death of the Internet

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lady-lazagna · 2 years

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MFB Phone Headcanons- Pt:2

(Here's part 1/Legendary bladers edition) How I think the Beyblade characters would communicate with each other/use social media :)

Madoka: Usually uses proper grammar/punctuation in all her texts but WILL YELL IN ALL CAPS IF NECESSARY. Only uses the heart emojis, does text emoticons for faces >:) Tried really hard not to get too into social media at first, but the likes are just so validating! All her followers are just so nice! Really popular on bey modding TikTok.

Benkei: Sends people good morning/goodnight texts regularly. Also checks in on as many people as he can as often as he can. ALL OF HIS TWEETS ARE IN ALL CAPS. Acts like an old man on TikTok, only uploads the occasional video to tell a story or show off something neat he found (like a cool bug or smth).

Tsubasa: Prefers texting over calls, but still only does it out of necessity. Doesn't really get the hype of social media, but likes to check in to see what his friends are up to. Posted one (1) photo of himself at the beach and blew up for some reason?🤔

Yu: "Ya got games on ya phone?" all day every day, even though he has his own phone with about a million games on it. Age restrictions on social media? Well, good thing he was born in 1965 :)) Tried to make a twitter account but Tsubasa drew the line at letting him see that shit.

Masamune: A prime clout chaser. Will send memes specifically to people that can't possibly understand them at ridiculous hours of the night. Sends reaction memes to respond to people instead of saying anything half of the time. Loves sharing every thought he has on Twitter and TikTok because everyone needs to hear what he has to say. Accidentally blew up on LGBT TikTok before he realised he was gay.

Hikaru: Loves a long call with someone filled with nothing but shit talking others. Sure, she loves her job, but given the opportunity to complain and she'll be on the phone for hours. Is more of an observer rather than a participant on social media, but will occasionally post a picture of a nice outfit she bought or a particularly pretty makeup look, just to keep up the image that she's doing fine :)

Ryo: Does the classic Old Person thing of ending random sentences like this... Also signs off every single text with his name, just in case you forgot who's number this is. DO NOT LET HIM ON SOCIAL MEDIA OF ANY KIND. Blader DJ let him be in charge of the WBBA official TikTok for one day and he spammed the app with "pranks" he played on his employees (STEALING MY SECRATARY'S STAPLER😂🤣😅🤪), terrible dances, and "yelling whatever you guys tell me to say in the middle of the office" (Masamune told him to say fuck these hoes. He said fuck these hoes).

Hyoma: The cell service in Koma is pretty fritzy so he has to travel pretty far out of the village to talk to his friends, but most of the time he prefers to send letters, anyway. Once he learned what the fuck a "Tick Tock" was, he started uploading little stories about Koma, videos overlooking the nice scenery of the village, and trying to see if Hokuto reacts like a regular dog to certain things (think "seeing how my dogs reacts when I play a squeaking sound"). Hokuto is not amused.

#mfb #metal fight beyblade #beyblade #madoka amano #benkei hanawa #tsubasa otori #yu tendo #masamune kadoya #hikaru hasama #ryo hagane #beyblade hyoma #headcanons

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book-reviews-by-an-idiot · 1 year

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No One Needs to Know by Lindsay Cameron

271 pages

Dual POV

2.5 🌟

Spice level-🌶

***Contains spoilers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!***

As I first started this story I was expecting drama, murder, a who dunit mystery that kept me on my toes. I was underwhelmed and unimpressed on how it played out.

The story follows three mothers: Norah, Heather, and Poppy.

Heather is the classic mom who wanted better for her Daughter Violet than herself. She pushes her daughter hard to do good in school, get excellent over-the-top grades, and get into a high-level boarding school for high school. She works as an author and is one of the few parents at Violet's school that doesn't have millions. She wants her daughter to succeed but when a leaked picture on an anon Insta account gets seen by hundreds, she might go a little too far to protect her own.

Norah was your typical workaholic mom who was hardly home, hoping she isn't messing up her child by being gone all the time. She made millions so her family never had to worry about finances like she did as a kid, with her mom slowly succumbing to Parkinson's (which is only ever brought up once throughout the book). All she wanted was to keep Caroline on track and try not to notice how sketchy her husband, Bennett, had been lately. Her husband also owned a gym where he trained those on lacrosse teams called Reflex an important detail at the beginning of the book.

Poppy wasn't happy in her marriage. It was sexless and unloving, she was a trophy wife in her relationship, but she didn't mean to cheat. Or rather she definitely did. Norah had the right to be suspicious about her new husband Bennett. At first, it was just flirting, a quip here, a compliment about her lips there. Until she invited him into her and her husband's bed. The prenup she had signed with her husband flashed before her eyes. She had screwed up, Bad.

She also had a housekeeper that I will call M. She was incredibly good-looking and one of the only ones to see Bennett come into the apartment for the cheating event. And always seemed to be in the wrong room at the wrong time.

Not long into the story, the readers find out about an app called UrbanMyth and The Doubles dance.

UrbanMyth is an anonymous app where you can go to post just about anything you can set your mind to. Cheating husbands, inflation at the grocery store, and accused drug dealers in a private middle school. Anyone can comment, but the catch? It only takes a small group of hackers to send it tumbling down(I will come back to this in a second)

The Doubles dance is basically if someone locked 100 or so celebrities in a room without their phones. The kids were all filthy rich and didn't realize their actions had consequences. All three kids end up at this dance: Poppy's son Henry, Heather's daughter Violet, and Norah's daughter Caroline. Henry is covered in phone numbers written in pen by the girls at the dance, a weird tradition that they have there.

As Heather drops off her child, waiting back just to make sure, a child, a girl, sneaks around the guard not giving him her phone, and runs into the dance. This is where the drama starts, with this well-written line by Heather that makes it sound like her daughter died but was actually just caught vaping. (Henry is in the picture as well, or rather his arm reaching out to take the vape from Violet)

"Rules were rules. If she hadn't left. If She'd somehow intervened. If. If. If."

As I said previously, Violet was caught in a picture, vaping, and was posted to an anon Instagram account, to which Heather freaks out and blames Norah's daughter Caroline. Eventually going as far as to search through Caroline's phone for the picture which leads me to my next subject.

Bennett, lovingly referred to as stepdad by caroline, bastard by Poppy, and countless other names by me as the book continues on. Bennett has a business of sleeping with wealthy women and getting them on tape if you catch my drift, forcing them to give up a ransom for deletion of the video(but let's be honest he probably doesn't delete them.) As he and Poppy are laying in the bed she sees his phone recording and screams at him to leave. A lot of stuff goes down but in small words, he demands money in a week and she freaks out thinking her husband is going to divorce her and take everything because of the prenup. She does end up transferring him the money, but wasn't able to meet up with him so she doesn't know if he deleted the video.

Caroline finds out about Poppy and Bennett very early on, catching a picture of them on her phone, making out in the backseat of her car. Norah later finds this picture, as does Heather as said above, and kicks him out of the house, with him telling her she will regret what he had done.

As I said before, Urbanmyth is very popular amongst the Crfton middle school parents. Except, well it gets hacked. Everyone's secrets are out. A lot of stuff happens during this time but it's not big enough to be remembered by me. Except Heather doing something incredibly stupid after finding the picture. Posting on the app about how she was sleeping with the coach at Reflex, trying to out Poppy to the world. But instead getting heavily questioned by the police.

Norah gets a call from Bennett's mom about not being at her birthday party and this is when the story gets juicy. You see he had never missed a party of his dear mother's. Like ever. A few days later he's missing. Oh no not Bennett.

Skipping a few parts we are in the living room of Poppy's apartment. Heather, Poppy, M, and the doorman stand there. A secret is let out, Bennett wasn't just missing, he was murdered. By M. Which she annoyingly, and willingly admits. The day Poppy was supposed to meet him in the apartment, Bennett went after M, touched her in a place she didn't like while she was cleaning, and tried to rape her. She pushed him off, she was on a ladder, and he hit his head and died on impact(or possibly broke his neck I can't remember exactly. Maybe both.) Fernando, the doorman, hid the body because M and he are dating.

He is found a day before this interaction, in the water underneath a bridge. The police suspect no foul play, and when they arrive at Norah's apartment tell her that he most likely committed suicide by jumping off the bridge. Poppy and the others find this in the news headlines and accept this as their new normal.

The book ends with M in a bank, holding a 100k check in her hands and depositing it into her account. Poppy had given it to her for her silence, and because she was laying her off. And then she is free.

All in all the book by itself is a decent and quick read. But don't trust the tags that read 'thriller', 'fast-paced', or 'murder mystery' because it's just not that. On page 240ish, the murder is first brought up. I rated this book this way because I was severely disappointed, and led to believe it was something it was not. There is no mystery ad the one who murdered Bennet was jut out right said and there was no detectiveness that you could do to try and figure it out. I wished that it was in third person because the three person dual POV was a little hard to follow at first, and wished the book was much longer. I also would have loved to learn more about Poppy's son Henry because it seemed he was just there to connect her to Crofton. And honestly I think the kids' POV's would have been a cool way to do this as well. If you want a quick read I recommend it, but if you want a thriller? Somewhere else is your best bet.

#no one needs to know #book review #2.5 stars #so ummm #bookshelf #drama #dual pov #short book #274 pages #not a thriller

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good-healthy-product · 1 day

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Viral Cash: Easy Money Made Engaging (Review).

I've always been curious about these "make money online" apps, but so many seem like scams. However, after reading reviews and doing my research, I decided to give the Viral Cash App a go. Let me tell you, it's been a surprisingly positive experience!

Simple Sign-Up and Engaging Interface

Signing up for Viral Cash was a breeze. The app itself is very user-friendly and has a clean, modern interface. Everything is laid out clearly, with easy-to-follow instructions for each task. It doesn't feel cluttered or overwhelming, which is a big plus for me.

Multiple Earning Opportunities

What truly impressed me was the variety of ways to earn cash through Viral Cash. You're not limited to just one repetitive task. Here are some of the options I've enjoyed:

Watching Short Videos: This might sound mindless, but Viral Cash curates a surprisingly interesting selection of short-form videos. I've discovered some cool new content creators and even learned a few things along the way. Each video you watch earns you a small amount of cash, which adds up over time.

Completing Micro-Tasks: These micro-tasks can involve anything from simple surveys to trying out new free apps. They're a great way to earn a quick bit of cash while taking a short break.

Social Media Engagement: Like and share posts on your favourite social media platforms? Viral Cash rewards you for doing what you might already be doing! This is a fantastic way to stay connected with your online network while earning a little extra on the side.

Referral Program: If you find the app helpful, you can share your referral code with friends and family. Whenever someone signs up using your code, you both earn a bonus! It's a great way to spread the word and get rewarded for it.

Fast and Hassle-Free Cashouts

Once you've accumulated enough cash in your Viral Cash account, redeeming it is a breeze. The app offers a variety of secure withdrawal methods, and I received my first payout within just a few business days. No waiting weeks or jumping through hoops – just a smooth and efficient process.

Overall, a Positive and Rewarding Experience

Viral Cash isn't going to make you rich overnight, but it's a fantastic way to earn some extra cash while you're doing things you might already be doing online. The app is user-friendly, offers a variety of earning opportunities, and pays out quickly. Whether you're looking for a way to supplement your income or just want some extra pocket money, I highly recommend giving Viral Cash a try.

#Viral Cash: Easy Money Made Engaging (Review).#Easy money #viral video #viralpost #viral trends #trending

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kyrodo · 3 months

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If there's anything I learned from 2020, it's take your time with people. Granted I was depressed angry and not in a good mental state back then which is why I ended up in a lot of cyclical rants that I could not stop myself from doing almost every day. But it doesn't change the fact that you can't force your way into someone else's life. You can't act familiar with people you just met or only barely started interacting with. You can't expect welcoming treatment from people that don't want you there.

I had a heart. I fell for someone out of desperation, out of this wanton desire to find someone to fulfill a void left behind by moving away from all the friends I used to hang out with. And that made it very difficult despite all the times I tried to delete or lock my account to avoid stalking the person I liked. The feeling was fresh and strong enough that the curiosity always got the better of me, and my emotional state was in some ways relieved to an extent by being able to see the other person's posts and activity.

It also holds true for EnternodeCS and VeraLycaon and TuccLux that I've had crushes on since that event that I did not attempt to confess to. Whenever I like someone for whatever reason I want to check up on them. And those kinds of activities can be frowned upon and reacted to very negatively, especially once you've worn out your welcome. And being blocked or someone locking their account should ideally be the point at which I stop trying to contact someone. Logically anyway. Emotionally I didn't feel like I had much choice. Emotionally the thoughts were so strong, the curiosities were so strong, and what little signs of interaction we had were so vivid that I had to keep checking if there was anything directed at me. And usually there always was. I had no such similar interaction with any of the aformentioned crushes since then.

The fact that I confessed is also the biggest issue. The fact that I committed and acted upon my feelings and put all my hopes on them giving a positive response. That act alone doomed me to continue, and amplified my emotions out of control. Gave me this spark of hope that was very much ill-conceived. And the fact that I knew so little about the person that I liked did not help my case at all. It put me at the complete mercy of them always being kind with me. And most of the time they weren't. And to be fair I wasn't acting very mature about my feelings nor about the overhead of having an existing mate. I wasn't acting mature in general. Everything about how I was behaving and how I was portraying myself. How extra I was being was extremely unattractive and not indicative of a healthy relationship being able to form from it. And I always went from 0 to 100 in most cases. My anxiety was always on full display. And yet I was still trying to push forth something that I didn't make look feasible. I didn't like all the times I was being blatantly gaslighted but I should've taken that into account before I continued attempting to interact. I should've taken that as a sign that this was not meant to be.

And things obviously went extremely well with Choskey. I still have Red I've been slowly attempting to smooth over Red's side of things more. He acts passive aggressive way more often ever since his father's death. Choskey very much embodies receptive love in every possible way it could be expressed. It's been 2 months and I'm clearly a drug he's addicted to and incredibly happy about. And it's so natural. We can't stop expressing how we feel for each other and that's incredible. Even with Kara, I always felt like I was overdoing it when I always took too long to say good night and tell her my romantic feelings. With Red, it ended up being Red who did most of the love expressing before I could get to it, and that was a welcome change. But trying to do it back was a bit harder because of the dynamic of master and pet and me being the lower submissive one. I couldn't treat it the same way I approached it with Freedom/Kara/Miranthia.

With Choskey it feels so natural. That we can fully express how we feel and do it constantly and just feel happy every time we express it and not feel like we're doing it too much. Choskey again expresses it more than I do but I can approach it in a way that I'm taking care of him rather than being taken care of. And that offers me a way to express love in a way that I can't do as easily with Red. I like having both. I like being on both ends and that's why it's a very good thing that I have them both.

My journey to Choskey's heart took a lot longer than it did with my 2020 crush. I never pushed for anything. I never pushed him into anything. In fact I didn't even confess, it was him that did it instead. I didn't come to him spouting my entire life story to him. He did learn a lot about me, but it was paced. It was bits at a time as we took our time with each other. I've always taken my time with him. I've always held my tongue even when I was mad usually due to his gaming banter. I've always been patient with him, I gave him all these first time experiences and helped him a lot with his class work. But there were no conditions. He stayed in call with me on our discord server of his own accord. Everything we did together was always of his own accord. And that made a world of difference.

In a sense that was indeed what my earlier crush tried to get me to do. Everything was always of my own accord. But I was always punished for it, in excess. Sometimes without any warning, sometimes with every sign that things were going to go well by the crush themselves beforehand in the indirect ways we communicated. But I can see a lot of problems in the way that I was acting to the point that sometimes it's easy to see why. Why I was such a volatile thing to juggle around for them with these grandiose reactions to everything expressed in overly extra ways.

I was very careful with Choskey. So careful. So mellow. So toned down, so down to earth, so simple and straight forward and always so polite and kind. To the point that besides my imperfect gaming skills, I was basically perfect to them. The person that I wish I could've been far earlier I get to live out and see how much better things really are. Choskey is easier to deal with than Ult in a lot of other ways including overall temperment, but the biggest thing is I was better. I was always a good friend to him. I always took my time with him. I was always patient with him. I was always easy to talk to and share everything with. I always listened to him.

I always did my best for him. I always tried to show my best side for him. And even when I was mad at him, I displayed it in a way that made him think more about his side of things rather than mine. I always pulled my punches, show self respect but kept my doors opened rather than closed. And from that true love grew. I excite him every time I speak. He loves every little thing about me so wholly and so fully. He embraces me so readily and so strongly. I proceeded in a way that Red could still be with me. And I've more than outdone myself. And there is a solid path forward. And I've experienced immense happiness. These feelings are so raw and so powerful and so received and welcome. I feel the butterflies inside and they glow so warmly, so vividly. And it is so clear that we can get along so well, gaming banter aside. It is so easy to be around him and bask in this deep romance with him. It is so easy to excite him and press his buttons too. We are meant for each other. I've wanted this so bad, and he's wanted this for his entire life. And I can be the one to love him.

It is very clear to me everything that went wrong on either side of things back then, but there are things I can do for myself that make things socially so much more successful. Always take your time with people, and never try to be where you don't belong. Kindness, patience, flexibility, understanding, communication, these are all things that you can't do without when you want something to go well. Things you need in abundance. And to Choskey I embody every single one of those things. What little competition I had fell away very quickly and this is very much why. Our love is so incredibly secure that we would stick together in multiple lifetimes. And this is how it's done. There's literally nothing I could do better. And it's sustainable, it feels so natural, it's easy, it's satisfying, and this is my life now.

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reissance · 10 months

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so as someone who works in social media, i would not recommend threads an alternative. it connects to your instagram account and unlike signing up for apps with an email like other sites, it doesn't have an opt in or out option for making your email address public or not. if you're signing up with your personal insta, there's a chance irls can track your threads rp account. if you intend to sign up for an instagram for rp, since meta acquired it they've changed their rules on signing up for instagram and basically made it where if you don't provide some form of verification that that account is yours,it could get locked permanently. this verification? you need to provide a photograph of your face in real time. you won't be able to make an instagram rp acc without going through this process. twitter rpers are better of just migrating to discord or to mewe or even mastodon (both of which are kind of similar in format to both facebook and twitter). there's also soup.io but idk if that's still up and running. just please don't connect your rp accounts to platforms where the privacy rules are uncertain and could easily get you doxxed on the internet!!!!

wait wait back up? you can't create an ig acc without showing your face???? since when omg??? is this like globally bc i don't remember anything like that though my ig is a couple of years old lol

honestly I have some faith that twitter will do something to fight off threads but so far I'm taking a little bit of a break bc i have not been having a lot of fun looking at discord groups and other apps are just weird to me tbh but thanks for the info!

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keenexpertfestival · 1 year

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Try These 5 Things Once you First Begin Dating (Due to Science)

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