#and health care goddamn it

[mymitochondriaforpresident]

If Wille abdicating means being with Simon then I accept it.

#he would have been goddamn miserable anyway #they went REALLY hard on him this season #protect yourself tbh #i choose to look at this as a boundary that someone with anxiety is setting #as self-care #and honestly why should wille be the one who has to bear the burden? he can still advocate for change #like realistically i’m sure he’s still going to be somewhat of a public figure #wille mental health advocate WHEN (and it’s canon that simon supports that 🥹) #young royals

[mitta-likes-moths]

I need to put them through such a situation they will never recover from

#malewife cooks #miniforce #their situations are perfect for inspiration like imagine everything was like really good for their skill level #but then they get absolutely CRUSHED by this new horrific situation #brutal terrible absolutely traumatizing #the writing is like #decent but I like the show anyways it’s fun #it never really made me feel things but like lemme do more with the things I’m being presented #Lucy should get a callback to being turned to stone that one time #👏Volt👏having👏doubts👏of👏being👏leader #Sammy taking notes from Volt taking better care of his mental health and accepting some goddamn help #dw I have emotional issues too I can do this #Max wondering if he’s too sensitive or gullible #Lucy like not knowing if she’s too overbearing and prying #put them in situations

[lucienne-thee-librarian]

Just saw Godzilla Minus One last night, having an Extremely Normal One about it. Art isn't dead after all

#go see it guys if you can I swear to god #tho there are a couple scenes which if you have severe thalasophobia Mayne....maybe don't or at least take a bathroom break then #Because for me thats never been an issue but FUCK I was biting my own hand in the theater #bouncing in my seat I was so tense because the suspense was AWFUL it was so good #it is. Not what I expected because I knew literally nothing about it besides 'its a godzilla movie' and my friend said it was good. I went #to see it because I'm a monster movie fan and wanted to meet up with a friend over movies and dinner and nothing else I give even one rats #ass about besides the color purple is out rn #so it shot the MOON over my expectations which were...me going in totally blind #the score is haunting the cast is goddamn incredible so is the cinematography and it has SO much to say allegorically #not just about the roots of the franchise aka the horrors of nuclear power #but about the effects of war and mental health stigma and the power of love and community and its a very humanizing film #unlike some other monster/disaster movies and. Ahhh #you will care so much about the humans in this movie

[myriadsystem]

.

#personal #i have doctors appt today with a new doctor its literally not even a real appointment i just need some stupid forms signed #but guys im so stressed im so scared ive already cried once about it today i just. i fucking hate doctors so so much #theyre all so bad. im not in the mood to be dismissed again today and its 15 goddamn degrees so everything feels bigger and worse than it is #if they dont sign the form i dont get paid any more and if i dont get paid i cant continue to try and sort out my medical #which means i continue to not get paid and im just. so scared. so so fucking scared i dont even care if we find the start if the path #to vetter my health i dont care about gettinf better right now i just need this fucking form signed but #ive already been dismissised for it once and i have new doctor jitters. what do you mean i have to tell someone new that #i have ptsd and anxiety and depression and fibro and alleged bpd but its probably autism actually and hope #hope and prey they losten to me because its other doctors that have told me this and im definitely computer illiterate i couldntve come up #with all this on my own i promise ive done zero research into my own symptoms i live with every day im a simpleton im an idiot #please believe me dr refer me to ypur colleagues for further testing but in the mwan time sign the one form i need please #im so scared. i dont know what to do. my tarot says to tryst myself and find my own authority about the situation #but like literally legally i cant i have to rely on the hope this new doctor gives her signature or i dont get fucking paid as stated #i hate this i feel so shaky and nervous and nauseous and awful 😮‍💨 #and im supposed to do groceries today. im at the very end of my shopping like if i dont go get food today #then i dont eat tonight but its cold and rainy and im super stressed abt the appointment so idk if ill be able to go shopping after #i dont wanna die anymore but like rn i kinda do this is too much today feels like too much #help me im drowning

[taegularities]

…

#anybody else so busy that you forget to eat/take breaks?? lol #and even when there's time to do smth fun there's just nooo energy left!! all im able to do these days is watch stuff bc it doesn't require #much energy #but ive been writing again and working hard on everything so theres that!! #feeling of productivity!!… but goddamn the exhaustion.. only me? #someone remind me to eat on a daily basis fr bc it's a problem jkshfjkasf #hope you guys are all taking care of yourself pls prioritise yourself and ur health!!

[vvelegrin]

great! only eight phone calls with my doctor's office and three calls and one visit with my pharmacy later, and my stimulant is officially [???]

#this is beyond parody #one of those calls was me sobbing my guts out btw lmao #but hopefully one (1) more call with my doctor's office and one (1) more call with the pharmacy and one (1) more visit to the pharmacy #and i will have my goddamned medication #note that that is the MINIMUM #and assumes a level of competence on the part of my doctor and a level of care on the part of the pharmacy #that has yet to be displayed #like i get the medication is on your Bad List but it also allows me to make it through the day without sleeping multiple hours per day #and wanting to end my life because of how uncomfortably tired and just like... cognitively impaired i am because of it at all times lmao #health #probably not something i need to air on tumblr but holy fuck i am beside myself

[ozlices]

i have to make appointments & also let my doctor know id rather continue one of the new meds she put me on bc it actually helped but ive been completely unmedicated for 2 fucking days & the thought of doing Anything makes me wanna throw up im so over being a person

#mine #i rly do not have it in me to make appointments dawg i have medical trauma can i get used to one new doctor #before im tossed around like a gd hot potato to numerous others. i literally attend my appointments w my cane #what's not clicking abt me having VERY fucking low energy in the aftermath of sm straining stress bruh #but like i dont have a choice bc i could have some of my meds stopped if i dont see certain doctors & im just here like 🫠 #i feel somewhat stupid like damn i rly thought finally i had a chill doctor w common sense but no i still gotta fight for my gd life #just be given say over MY OWN GODDAMN WELLBEING #'oh well this causes physical health concerns' to be completely blunt idfc anymore. #truly i fucking do not #my body is a fucking nightmare my entire system resents at this point bc we always have some lvl of bs going on w it #we've no choice but to stop fucking caring bc the numerous mental strains we're dealing w worsen them ON THEIR OWN #& also like literally fuck off bc my body wouldn't be this shit if doctors actually TOOK CARE OF ME PROPERLY #before it got this bad. #there's no fucking fixing shit now by worsening my already overwhelmed & strained body/mind by making me a gd hot potato #if im not Actively Perishing or on the immediate brink of the risk IDC #I NEED TO FUCKING BE ALLOWED TO //CHILL THE EVER LOVING FUCK OUT// #//that// SHOULD BE THE PRIORITU #ive been strained for YEARS but esp since last year to a CONSTANT degree #can i fucking get one GODDAMN foot on the ground to pick myself back up jfc #im so tired & annoyed & sick of there always being SOMETHING #i just wanna fucking chill & finish my preps to stream again & get back to pursuing what i love please #im gonna LOSE MY MIND

[queerofthedagger]

we need to kill all bureaucracy i'm so fucking serious

#my health insurance has been a fucking pain in my ass for WEEKS now #about my dropping out to work transition #and now my employer ALSO fucked up big time #and they're so lucky it's friday evening because i WOULD have fucking snapped #like my employer just. really. fucking sent all my info to #the wrong. insurance company #bitch how #i gav you my insurance info not once. not twice. but three fucking times i just #argh #jokes on ME i literally called everyone two months in advance and was like 'anything i need to do?' #'no no all good it gets taken care of between insurance + employer' #and i believed them. like a goddamn fucking fool #I'm so goddamn tired good fucking LORD #mona rambles

[leo-kinnie]

Hey it’s not their fault there was a wildfire

(Ok maybe it is)

But like no one expected this to happen don’t blame Canada pls

-Air Quality Asker

Nah i’m blaming canada i’m choosing violence. We are Canada’s number one haters

#LMFAO #Yall got that wildfire because of that goddamn free health care 😡 #i’m slash J but I am a canadian government hater #ask #ask spam

[scoutpologist]

i am so fucking tired

#op #went to the doctor’s today and im still processing what they told me #but in short my health has been shattered by the stress of the past week #wish i could go back in time and stop myself from being a blind idiot but well. hindsight is 20/20 and all #im going to be dealing with the physical ramifications of this for a long long time #not saying this for pity or anything. i just. want anyone who reads this to know to take care of yourself and others #and for gods sake don’t fucking lie to people okay? just don’t #especially if it’s over months and months and months. like maybe reconsider #i know a lot of this is my fault but goddamn if i’m not mad at the originator of it all #i want to fully explain what went on at some point but for now i just need to stay afloat #anyways it’s 5 am i’m going to fucking Sleep

[apollo-zero-one]

I wish capitalism was a tangible object I could bite and claw at I start foaming at the mouth like a rabid dog when I think about it gwrrwhrwgwwrgwr

#my mom shouldn't have to have a job she is busy all goddamn day every goddamn day taking care of her mom and her 6 year old child #and she takes care of me and my brother and her husband this woman is exhausted #and she makes us breakfast and dinner every day and she watches all the neighborhood kids and and and #she is already fulfilling an extremely valuable roll in society!! why the FUCK should she have to have a job too!! #not even going to say 'outside the home' because her job IS OUTSIDE THE HOME she contributes to this whole damn community #It's BULLSHIT it's UNFAIR she deserves justice #and it's also bullshit and unfair that a household with three workinh adults cant afford a 4 bedroom family home. #We collectively make enoigj money that we lost our fucking health insurance and are being kicked out of our subsidized housing #But there are no homes anywhere near any of our jobs that we can afford so WHAT THE FUCK #and every part of it is capitalism and I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it #Is the purpose of life not to find and be with wnd care for loved ones?? are humans not born to love and be loved and help one another?? #what went wrong? why did we let it get this far? why are we taking a mother away from her 6 year old daughter so she can afford #both of their medicines that they need to live healthy lives??? #A caretaker away from a disabled elderly woman? A safe person to leave your children with away from the village? Why the goddamn divide?? #sorry there was ten minutes begween that tag and this one because I had to cry I am calmer now #still heavily anti-capitalist tho

[mimzy-writing-online]

Okay, I survived writing two papers this weekend. To what level of success, I have no idea. But I did my best and I'm just glad it's fucking done with.

#I also only got six hours of sleep this weekend #for non-academic actually-medical reasons #goddamn insomnia and goddamn pharmacy #and like there were definitely moments of delerium #I don't know if that's spelled right #whatever #and the lack of sleep makes the snow vision much... worse is technically the word everyone would use to describe it but #it's just more intense #the static is thicker #and it's green and grey instead of just being grey #and it moves faster and in circular patterns #totally intending to be a hypocrite here but get some sleep and take care of yourselves guys #I'm generally better at the whole taking care of myself and not pushing myself but #mental health is not static (fortunately and unfortunately) #I'm trying to get better #talking to my doctor and all that #anyway here's your incoherent 3am ramble #sans any useful advice but that's okay #mimzy things #okay I'm gonna try and catch a few hours of sleep #night everyone

[blujayonthewing]

both my parents in response to my canceling plans because we got covid: what? how?? you guys never do anything!

[shaking them] IT'S A GROUP EFFORT PREVENTION HAS ALWAYS BEEN A GROUP EFFORT AND EVERYONE ELSE ALIVE REFUSES TO PARTICIPATE AND TALKS ABOUT COVID IN THE PAST TENSE WHICH IS WHY WE'VE BEEN TURNING DOWN INVITES TO GO OUT FOR DRINKS AND SHIT THIS WHOLE TIME!!!

#JUSTIN HAD TO HAVE PT FOR HIS BACK! I HAD TO GO TO THE DENTIST BECAUSE I'M GETTING CAVITIES AT MY GUMLINE!! #WE LITERALLY HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO PARTICIPATE IN SOCIETY SOMEWHAT!! AND THAT SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN A FUCKING PROBLEM IN 20 GODDAMN 23!!! #no one fucking cares anymore except for people with immune disorders or people (hi! me!) who do not want to DEVELOP ANY #oh well! oh well!! we made it pretty far huh #... we're fine btw Justin's flu levels of sick and I wouldn't have even been sure I AM sick if he wasn't #but I worry about longterm effects #I worry about going from doctors being openly surprised that my health is mostly good #to being unsurprised and unconcerned and patronizing if I develop heart problems because I'm fat #OH WELL. WHATEVER. we were never gonna dodge it forever. the amount of social trauma I've put myself through in trying was always pointless #about me #irl frens #(and family)

[gunpowder-gemini]

The hedgehog has become communist.

Comrade Shadow.

#lmao I fucking died #we were straight up talking about how fucked the american health care system is #I was talking about this with *Shadow the Goddamn Hedgehog* which is so fucking funny #I later reminded him that giving up was what the rich want and he was like ah yeah you right #can't let them divide us #Shadow supports class solidarity #Shadow says eat the rich #shadow the hedgehog #sonic the hedgehog

[blunderpuff]

why does my mom get so unreasonably angry when i tell her she SHOULD remember her email password, and not just rely on her computer for that

#me and my mom #when she has to go to the library to print something from her email... she gets locked out of her account bc she doesn't know the password #and now she's mad and saying 'i have to have a password for the electric and the water and the HOA and' etc etc #none of that has to do with the fact that you should know your own mf email password!!! #and when i say smthg like 'oh damn i don't remember what stupid password i made up for the health care exchange' #she's like 'SEE?!?!?!?! YOU'RE NOT PERFECT! YOU DON'T REMEMBER YOUR PASSWORDS EITHER!!!' #lady please: there is a difference between 1. not remembering a password you use literally ONE time a YEAR #and 2. your goddamn email that you check several times a day and use to chat with your other child also several times a day #it's like the difference between forgetting where you parked at a stadium parking lot versus forgetting where you parked at work

[nullians]

I sometimes still catch myself thinking “Man, I just wanna die” (I know this is not true) but then I see my mother and go “No, I just wanna live without these people around me” and then I do one dig deeper and make peace with what I really mean and that’s “I have to outlive you because I fucking deserve to have a life outside of this bullshit” and yeah. Much better. It doesn’t help that both of them (grandmother and mother) like to occasionally tell us their dying scenarios. Like. Thanks. Can you like. Try to not make my desire to flee worse. Because I don’t want to wish you death but it’s like. Not going to get better if you just do this. Get help.

#d0 stuff #negative #we had an argument about the dishes again #and to all of the veterans here: yes I know this has been going on for as long as this tumblr exists #it’s just. still a problem. an unending cycle because I fucking Hate my parents’ guts and it’s actually not about the dishes or house #chores or anything like that. it’s about how they care so much about dumb things there are solutions to (not perfect maybe but not #disastrous either) and not care nearly enough about the human component. mental health? non existent. fatigue? just an excuse. permanent #debuffs? I’m making shit up. how can I suffer bc of them? that’s unheard of #circus family time #there is my fault in there and that’s letting my resentment seep so deep that #I regularly let it impact my actual house chores doing but you know #it’s like. I’ve wanted to be good for them. but they will never see me like that. the moment I showed anything weird they went on forceful #correcting instead of listening to what I had to say #they are all people caring more about reputations and facades than their own children/family members’ well-being #it’s infuriating #they are all fake #and idk. like. I could do better. I should do better I know. but it’s just goddamn hard to do things and get yelled at and then turn around #and see how they gush about my brother doing basically anything (the bare minimum after they told me to go remind him multiple times) or #how they literally take so much bs from anyone outside of the family #I swear. Some stranger’s potential opinion about them matters more than if their children feel hurt or not #anyways. this back and forth that’s been going on since my early teens is the reason I can’t just #do things for them without it feeling like a monumental task #like. I’m an acts of service person ffs. but I can’t do that. not for them #lmfao okay that’s enough whining for today #tho it’s funny how they will always be like ‘you have to control yourself no matter the situation’ and when we start arguing it’s always #them telling me to shut up (despite me keeping a calm tone) and them shooting me with literally all ammunition they can think of #fun right #and then there’s always this funny thing when they scream that I don’t even care about them do I #and that’s hilarious bc I do. Guess who literally deals with the worst of medical crises and who fucking keeps half of their energy to be #the guard dog. yeah but I don’t love you (anymore) and bc of that I’m a monster? lmao