#anyway im proud of myself. this shit is hard

[actual-sleeping-beauty]

Me: finally feeds my body enough to make it operate as it should, for the first time in at least a week, probably two. Also goes for a walk to clear out the cobwebs in my brain.

My brain, immediately: okay can we please clean up this hot mess of a room? For the love of all that is holy? Okay thanks I love you!

Will I learn anything from this? Probably not. But my therapist says frequently that we can use our rooms as a measure of how we're doing mentally, and for the first time in weeks I have a bed made up with fresh sheets, the duvet cover is actually on my duvet, not a basket on the floor, and my collection of empty clothes hangers has dwindled down to just the ones for what's finishing up on my drying rack overnight.

Sometimes I just have to be proud of my small wins, and this is one.

#if your room is a measure of your mental health how are you doing? #better after several weeks of bad #mental health #anyway im proud of myself. this shit is hard #tw depression #bc thats what ive got

[codecicle]

ghouls (guys) help im in a parasocial relationship with my own boyfriend </3 @felixisfruity

bonus:

I AM FINALLY ABOVE AVERAGE MALE HEIGHT 🗣🗣🗣‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥 LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOO ‼️‼️

#i make yet anothet post just for me 👍 #my love felix <3 <3 #I HOPE I DID YOU JUSTICE DUDE!!!!! #little doodle of my beloved while im working on the moon beast drawing #which btw fucks hard. like im proud of myself for once LMAO #anyway im horribly in love with my zombie boyfriend so if youll excuse me i have shit to do #(waiting by my phone until i see a notification from them <3 <3) #i may have hallucinated him having brown eyes but fuck it we ball

[vamptastic]

i have dug myself into a deep hole this past year and i am now finally making actual progress to digging myself back out 👍

#i had a wee mental breakdown and tanked my grades i'm not like homeless or in physical danger. don't want to worry #but ive been hiding everything and i finally just told my parents and it went surprisingly well and they're helping me figure it out #its gonna be uhhh hard but i just want to stop wasting months of my life away continuously so. i need to do this #as much as i am like deeply angry and ashamed of myself i am at least proud of myself for getting help #cos it was honestly getting to the point that i was considering harming myself to try to get out of this #and im glad im uhhh well enough to stop myself from doing that and reach out before that happens #anyway. friends & mutuals i am fine i just need to get my shit together lifewise & mentally

[katbrando]

on a separate note i put my foot down and left work early today bc i genuinely just couldn't handle it, and as much as i feel guilty as fuck abt it and know it will affect my paycheck i also know it was a very good thing... i shut everything out and got so much cleaning done today FINALLY (it's been a good three months), finalized loan consolidation shit as well, still had time to reward myself... i have three more days off and i feel like maybe i'll be able to breathe and decompress

#idk i struggle w/ speaking positively abt myself (working on it) but im proud of myself for getting all that shit done bc it was not easy #i've been trying so hard to be Gentle with myself bc my brain is a minefield that keeps getting set off by the tiniest shit #imagining diego telling me he's proud of me and saying somethin like 'finally... prioritize yourself you nutter' #and then giving me a lil Kiss 🥰 #he does a lot of Good for my brain... reminds me that it's fine to be selfish... Sometimes... as a little treat #anyway im rambling so much and that's my cue to go to sleep

[fagdykebassboy]

Can confidently say i can actually play this fucking thing yes its painful but i can fucking play it and thats what fucking matters

#its really just that second part of the chorus thats hard cuz he’s switching between notes every fucking note #like i Will have a severe hand cramp afterwards but i can fucking do it. #anyways im fucking proud of this one its fun as shit #anyways next metallica project is anesthesia i can play like 70% of it the rest i wanna punch a wall and kill myself etc etc

[mrfoox]

My motherly instincts are strong and make me go absolutely stupid at times

#miranda talking shit #If i didnt care about how others felt etc i would be clingy and hugging everyone i loved and shit but i #Am too anxious. So instead im like... Do you want a drink? An popsicle? I got candy. Do you want a fruit? Im bringing you a cookie #And it makes me so happy when i can do that. Im giving out juiceboxes to people working assisting me #Magnus is so hard to make accept things he always sounds like hes held by gun point #Meanwhile oliver is like 'yeah. I want that' 95% of the time and it makes me sososo happy #I never thought i was much of an acts of service type of person ... Bc i feel like i am not since my limited energy keeps me from doing #Much for myself even. But then im out there feeding my friends and paying for their food/items when we are out shopping #All my friends make me go stupid at small times but oliver is my top one. #Bc of his past and basically how he is . An sad/deppressed little guy with attachment issues and im therr like 🥺 #Hi... Hi there... Im bringing you a snack... He the biggest one that makes my instincts go off and at times i catch myself like... Miranda #Thats mom Miranda speaking. Please take a step back from the little man... #Id never tell him bc i know that would terrifie him but like man... #Im not saying i want a gf or bf that i can be a mom to... But emotionally ... A bit actually yes #Id never be able to be a good full mom bc i cant do like 70% of super moms do for their families #But emotionally i want to care for people i love like... Come let me sooth you. Let me hold you. Let me cheer you up. Let me cheer you on #Im proud of you and i see how hard youre working sweetie i love you #Anyway yeah. If i didnt have better self control id have 70% less friends bc i always have to hold myself back physically

[sunbeamsntangerines]

mourning the loss of friendships kind of wednesday 

#things i've had close friends say to me #you always want to act like we're family when we're not #proceeds to tell me happily about their foudn family sunday dinners with mutual coworkers within the same half year #after forgetting the defintion of a word *looks at me like im crazy* dont you read?? #anyway i often find myself befriending people who are more popular than me and then they get pretty close to me cuz u know im fun and a good #vibe most of the time and i dont rly start shit and then they just casually disrespect me or let me know exactly how little they value my fr #friendship and yeah i dont want to be around ppl who dont want to be around me #thats most of my bio family like ive had enough if ur in my life i love you and if i do give second and sometimes third chances #but a pattern is a pattern and i wont let myself be treated badly #and i am proud of that but i just hate having my sensitivity be thrown into my face #me being sensitive has saved me from bad friendships and relationships #and mostly the sad part is that i dont replace good friends as easily bc social anxiety and making friends as an adult is hard #i try to appreciate the ones i do have tho and just enjoy my time with whatever good ppl i come across regardless of if it feels like we'll #make it long term in actual friendship and its been rly fulfilling so far

[lovingaeth]

kisses my fingertips

#YEAAHHH BABEYYYY #im definitely doing too much for these stories bro LMFAO BUT I CANT SHUT MYSELF UP #love making shit hard for myself #ANYWAY I HATE WRITING THESE SM BUT IM PROUD OF THEM IDCIDCIDC #only 3 more to go WOOOOO #a.speaks

[littlemxuniverse]

I am sitting on my kitchen floor and honestly other than the cold butt I get why Trisha Paytas did it

#does it? #also i just found out i have the same middle name as them #ive been thinking about going by my middle name for a while now... but my first name is so fucking cool it just doesnt feel like me #oh and i accidentally came out as nb to my bf yesterday and i am like freaking out like thats the first time ive almost kinda said it out lo #out loud but yeah i feel so fucking good but also so scared and like i wasnt ready and i havent got all the answers but now he knows i feel #i have to have it all figured out or im like an imposter #fucking that imposter syndrmome is a bitch it just sneaks up on you #am i fucked up for kinda liking it/its as pronouns? that feels so fucking freeing like just such is such a fuck you and a letting myself jus #fucking exisit like a beast or something that hypernates and has 8 legs and doesnt care what you think about it #but also sometimes i imagine being called he and i have to clench my teeth so hard to stop from smiling #anyway i am fucking chanelling trish right now like the oracle of delphi or some shit #but fuck k really feel for them so much like not knowing the right words to use but seeing some that make sense for the first time #and being so excited and wanting to talk about it with someone #but when you do they get angry and say you used the wrong word and therefore you are bad and lying #i am so overwhelmed with love for those of you in our cool ass community reached out to them with empathy and their own experiences #and i am so proud of trish for pushing through and listening to those voices and not the ones telling them they were wrong #anyway that imposter syndrome is back and telling me people wont believe im actually sitting on the floor right now #okay i just accidentally deleted like four long as tags #i need to wrap this up w #um yeah bye

[applegameisprollytaken]

I have been putting off writing this for too long.

But, due to recent events... Might as well.

My mental health is in the shit. For the past few years, shit kept happening, and I pretended I was fine.

I got Tumblr less than a year ago, and planned to just post funny shit and get my dopamine hits by the few people nice enough to reblog my bullshit.

That kinda happened. But shit just got worse. Depression is a hell of a thing. So I got more dependent on what I already knew worked, but at this point, I just want to die. I always feel like a fuck-up that ruins everything I touch. But, you know what? I'm trying. But I want people to KNOW I'm trying. To know how hard I'm trying to keep it together. To know how hard it is to not let this affect everything else.

But, honestly, I just need someone to notice me. The things I made. Not my stolen jokes, not my glorified conversations. I want people to see what I spend so long on, and what I am so proud of.

I want people to see me for what I am, and what I'm trying to be.

I have tried therapy. I have tried everything you can think of.

None of it works.

I keep trying.

But none of this means I will stop. Wanna know why?

Because I know that there is always something trying to cause my downfall, and I'm spite fucking incarnate.

depression getting me to want to kill myself? its gonna have to shut down my liver like a REAL illness, because fuck you.

Anxiety got me thinking everyone is against me? I'LL JUST BE BETTER THAN THEM! Can't judge someone for being objectively better!

ADHD got me feeling like I can't do anything I usually love? Well, fuck you, I'm gonna do it anyways.

Life trying to throw another spanner in the works? I'm gonna keep on chugging, just to prove a FUCKIN POINT.

I AM SPITE INCARNATE. FUCK YOU ALL, IM GOING TO KEEP GOING.

GIVE ME YOUR BEST SHOT. I'VE ALWAYS BEEN READY FOR IT, FUCKFACE.

#rant post #this is a major vent #vent tag #major vent #vent #rant #spite #depression #adhd #anxiety #FUCK YOU ALL #im gonna keep going #no matter how hard you hit me.

[frecklystars]

im gonna start making doodles trying to reclaim my TF F/Os that i've lost, maybe once a week or once every two weeks... or once a month?? i dont know, i will try to keep some consistency but i really need to start slow on this. here's to hoping that drawing them every once in a while will make even just the smallest difference.

im so sick of associating these characters with my abuser and i'm so sick of the immediate fight or flight response that i get when just looking at pictures of TF characters or even the voice actors. i have tried just about everything... therapy, medication, exercise, watching a few clips from the shows, buying cameos, commissioning art/fics, talking to voice actors in person at conventions... nothing has helped me get better at all. i tried giving up on TF entirely, throwing out/giving away all of my TF merch, refusing to touch the franchise, but that has only made me more and more miserable as time has passed. it has been over a year since [insert the most horrific experiences ever here] happened to me and since i associated that with a long list of things, TF included. and im! sick! of feeling bad! so! if im gonna be miserable no matter what, then i might as well try to get better, right?? drawing my F/Os loving me has never failed me before, so here's to hoping it isn't gonna fail me now. i am quite the stubborn bitch and i refuse to allow my main coping mechanism i've used for 2 decades to remain tainted forever and ever 😤😤

these will be the shakiest, shittiest doodles imaginable, but i think drawing the robots i miss so much at least once a month can help me rewire my brain into believing they're safe again and they love me and i'm not in danger. i think the best thing that will help me is drawing my Ryan F/Os interacting with them as "proof" that they're safe to be around, that they've "approved of" them, will help me slowly reclaim them. fake it til you make it as they say. let's try this for maybe just a couple of months as a slow start and see how it goes :/

any TF doodles will be tagged as "reclaiming robots tag" and nothing else - free to blacklist it if you dont wanna see. i'll most likely be rarely posting these but jic //shrug

anyway. yay. attempts number one and two. i like to think barbie and ken stop by the starflower meadow every now and then because stsc summons them across the multiverse, asking them how i'm doing, if i'm safe, if i miss him at all. wow i am shaking so bad. ha ha haaa. these took about ten?? minutes?? so woohoo to ten minutes of drawing TF. im proud of myself for trying. even if i dont go through with this and end up not being able to draw TF ever again, at least i managed this one single post. if i keep this up, maybe a year from now, or two years or five years or whatever, i'll be able to handle it. i don't even expect to hyperfixate on TF ever again because my self shipping will never ever be the same w/ them -- i'll never interact with the fandom again, i'll never reblog fanart or gifsets or anything like that ever again, if i even somehow managed to feel good enough to actually throw myself back into the shows -- but i want to think i'll feel indifferent to it one day. to not have that fight or flight response. that is my goal. literally the bare fucking minimum <3

anyway. i'm super nauseous. this is so incredibly hard! holy shit!!! but that's why i have to do this. to quote pedro pascal, i am going to have a panic attack and i am going to leave 👍✨

(BTW I am still gonna stay offline for a few more days. I am back from vacation but I am SO burnt out I don't want to interact with dms/my inbox yet. I just wanted to post this just to get it out of my system and let it disappear into the void. But I will be back later this week bc I still have some commissions to finish and I wanna gush about my very exciting time meeting steve/tom/the brba cast. anyway... goodnight. i love you. smooch)

#reclaiming robots tag

[rowarn]

HI !!! i just wanted to tell you that your new ghost fic is SO INSANELY GOOD. like. wow. the amount of dedication and effort you put into the fic clearly shows through how beautifully constructed it is. it was such an emotional ride and i cried SO HARD when simon was being mean to reader like YOU CANT JUST SAY THAT ! but im happy simon apologises especially considering how hard it is to show vulnerability. reader was written in such a relatable manner i could literally see myself in the fic as i read through it YOU DID AMAZING. AND THE SMUT!! SCREAMS ITS SO GOOD i was giggling and kicking my feet AAND WHEN SIMON GOT MEAN!! the way he was snarling LIKE PHEW! sorry i was just so excited for the fic AND THE END RESULT JUST EXCEEDED EVERYONE'S EXPECTATIONS FOR SURE. i am gonna be thinking about it the whole day :( will probably reread too because its like 1 am here BUT ANYWAYS . you did absolutely amazing and i hope you are proud of yourself !! give yourself a treat you deserve it >:3

AHHH THANK U SO MUCH FOR SUCH KIND WORDS IT RLLY MEANS A LOT !!!!

i'm glad that i was able to make the readers cry bc i did cry myself while writing it 🥹 simon was so mean that i thot ppl were gonna be like HES IRREDEEMABLE but it seems a lot of ppl were mad at both him AND reader LMAO 😭 i'm glad ppl found the reader relatable regardless of how....messy they were in the head for a good while.

i was havin to do LAPS while writing the smut bro 😭 when he started bein all commanding and shit i was like DAMN he's so dreamy i was truly in love with PLM!simon for the whole fic what a man!!!!!!

BUT THANK U FOR READING IT AND TSKING THE TIME TO SEND ME AN ASK ABT IT HEHE <33333

#ask

[wraithsoutlaws]

.

i know it's just the Depression(TM) but i feel so forgettable lately and like i just can't do anything Good and certainly not something i'm really Proud of and i so rarely have motivation to do ANYTHING at all and when I do i spend it completely mortified that it's gonna be total shit and i'll hate it and it will make me feel even worse about it all because i can't even make myself happy and its just a constant of

>don't do art. feel bad > do art. feel bad

it just sucks when your main creative outlet is tied to the problem and its extra stupid because I KNOW its just my dumb brain being literally dumb as shit but that doesn't stop that feeling you know. i was also thinking about those "end of year VP" templates and how like...i really haven't done much that really sticks out to me this year and that sucks too. i Know that "good" has no meaning here but no amount of self awareness makes it any better.

so what do i do if i can't do art or vp or write or work on this stupid puzzle that's taunting me all day long to feel better? i lay in bed and feel worse. its too cold and gross to be outside and touch the grass.

*this isn't me looking for back pats or whatever i just gotta vent sometimes just to get it out im fine i promise it is fleeting it will pass* *you know your fandom is poison when you're self-conscious about your own mental illness vent posts because someone might use it to talk shit about you

anyways akfdljksal i've been sitting for over a week trying to figure out what to do for dagger's birthday pics and it took me so long to kind of get an idea and now i keep not having the energy or motivation to do it and now its in 2 days and im gonna be so mad at myself if i don't just let myself enjoy it (he is very special to me. cringe-haters hate me). its just so hard to find the joy when you're whole world is in a fog.

#*trust falls into the fiery pits of hell* #<- didn't know that's how you spell fiery #anyway this is jsut your normal sadboy vent post nothing to see here #if i don't verbalize it it will fester into a fungus and i Will begin to rot

[noisolpxe]

left - 01/08/24, right - 01/14/24

almost one week of nail growth, a bit of grooming in between these images so they're slightly different shapes (squared vs rounded) .... it's been about a month now but i wanted to share my progress of growth in just the past week!

more thoughts below the cut

just to start this off i wanna say i've been a chronic nail biter for as long as i can remember, it's something that went hand in hand with my anxiety & adhd — both my mom and stepdad also bite their nails too so i grew up around it (along with being shamed and scolded my entire life by those same people for biting my nails)

i'm very proud of the progress i've made so far, considering i started really working towards not biting my nails on dec 18 2023 ... it's now jan 14 2024, so it's been about a month of this journey trying to stop biting my nails

i don't have any advice to how i stopped biting my nails to anyone who's trying to stop, other than just. holding myself accountable and redirecting my energy towards other things. also being okay with catching myself wanting to bite my nails - such as putting my fingertips in my mouth and feeling the nails with my teeth but not biting down - i try very hard not to shame myself or be upset with myself because habits are Very hard to break. and earlier in this journey (first week or so) when i did end up biting my nails and having to start from scratch, i tried to stay positive about my progress and will continue to do so if i slip up again, yknow?

anyways. some things i've noticed since my nails are now longer than they've ever been in my life:

1. shit gets caught under my nails constantly!! this is why painting my nails black is good cuz it helps me not obsess and pick at them (don't worry, i groom very regularly so my nails Are Clean)

2. my nail beds need a lot more time to fully heal and that's okay! also, everyone's nail beds aren't 'perfect' or all symmetrical, and there's no need to obsess over "how" my nails are growing in, it's better to appreciate that they're healthy now and getting healthier by the day

3. there's certain little joys i find for myself as my nails have gotten longer - one of the main ones is that sometimes when i type on my phone now i can hear my right thumbnail clacking against the screen. i never thought i'd be to this point, but now it's an everyday occurrence!! also, being able to scratch my husband's back for real is so affirming - i actually have to be careful when scratching myself not to go too hard now, too, cuz there's nails and not just my fingertips digging into skin!

okay this is starting to get kind of rambly and honestly is mostly for myself to come back to as i continue my journey of trying to break the habit of biting my nails. i just wanna finish off by saying again that i am very proud of myself for the progress i've made so far and i'm excited to be able to look back at this post and see how much further i've come.

idk how to end this so. here's some more pics courtesy of my husband. im gonna go paint my nails again

#★

[ubelforge]

i saw you were looking for fic inspo.. lemme preface by saying literally anything jonathan davis x ftm reader. im like desperate, there needs to be more out there for us (T___T)

loose ideas; jd comforts reader while they’re sick or vice versa / maybe they’re high school friends who’ve been into each other for a while - idk im not great at coming up with this stuff but i’m excited to see what you end up writing!

HELL YEAH‼️‼️‼️🤯

Dude, this actually fits so perfectly for what I’m going for for my first fanfiction, plus I’m sick right now and this fits perfectly along with me being FTM myself! Thank you very much Anonymous and shall receive for what they asked for :) I admit my fanfic is kind of bad because I’ve never really posted it before,lmao, anyway, I’ll stop yapping (but Ty)❤️

🪐⊹｡⋆✧｡˚⭒ ⋆ ✦ ⋆⭒˚｡✧⋆｡⊹🛸 ⊹｡⋆✧｡˚⭒ ⋆ ✦ ⋆⭒˚｡✧⋆｡⊹👽

Jonathan Davis x Sick! FTM Reader

🪐⊹｡⋆✧｡˚⭒ ⋆ ✦ ⋆⭒˚｡✧⋆｡⊹🛸 ⊹｡⋆✧｡˚⭒ ⋆ ✦ ⋆⭒˚｡✧⋆｡⊹👽

┃takes place in 1998. Someone snook away from the studio to take care of you and brought some.. toxic waste- I mean, soup to take care of you, ends up in cuddling and fluff <3

┃words: 1209

┃Physical sex: none mentioned!

┃Contains of the following: Coughing, sickness, fluff, a little nsfw (if you squint very hard), overthinking, gender dysphoria, scar mention, use of slurs

🔭.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・☄️

Jonathan opened your door slowly to see if you were awake. You were playing your Game Boy with a smile on your face with some Flyleaf in the background. You had to skip work due to your sickness. You are wearing a no shirt and some boxers lying flat in bed. No one usually sees you like this. You were always wearing hoodies and sweaters with some long pants. You tried your best to fit in, mainly in public too. Luckily, your boyfriend and his bandmates support you. The door creaked open which caught your attention. You looked up to see your boyfriend, Jonathan. You let out a sharp gasp along with some crunchy-ass coughing.

You tried to let out some words but couldn't due to your coughing.

"J-Jonathan wha-" you kept coughing which caused you to sit up in bed. Jon stood awkwardly.

He shut the door behind him holding a plastic container. Something. Jonathan stared at you. He slowly walked over to you standing at a reasonable distance.

"I know I'm supposed to be out at work and shit, but I just wanted to...I don't know. Cheer you up, dude. Couldn't stay in the recording room knowing you were suffering at home. Well.. looks like you're having fun though." he points to your game boy. You let out a weak laugh. He rubbed the back of his head awkwardly as he stared. You blushed deeply but you were already red in the first place because of your stupid Flu and hay fever. "Plus. I made something for you to hopefully cheer you up and make you feel just a little better I guess." He smiled. He was very.VERY proud of himself.

"Yeah.. no." you looked at the plastic container. Looks like something you find at the Chernobyl site.

"Come on, just fucking eat it it’s not that hard, babe." Jonathan glared as he stared at you. You kept staring at the ceiling as you rolled your eyes and coughed. The back of your throat felt like fire from hell itself. It felt raw and a burning sensation filled your throat. You had a raging flu along with hay fever. You scuffed.

"Jonathan, I'm fine. Just.. leave me alone, I don't wanna get you sick." you half lied. All you wanted to do was be alone and not eat the toxic waste that he made. But at the same time, you didn't want him to catch what. Jonathan laughed.

"Nice try man just.. Eat it. Please?" He placed it on the bedside table. Jonathan sat down on your bed, he faked puppy eyes and he put his hands together. In a begging position. God, he was annoying as hell sometimes. But you loved him for that. You admit, it was adorable. you looked at the bedside table at the soup. Before you even opened your mouth Jonathan Blurted out, making you snap out of your thoughts. "Plus, turn this Emo shit off dude. I brought some REAL music for you." He happily pulled out a CD case, opening it to reveal just a plain disk. He ran over to your CD player, taking Fly Leaf out of the CD player to replace it with some "real music" of his. You scuffed and smiled, along with a few annoying ass coughs. Some of his music started to play. He smiled and started to ngid his head, proud of himself. You let out a small laugh, starting to enjoy his company. In your room, trying to make you feel better. Jonathan walked over to you,

"'ll make you a deal, ___, if you at least take a few bites of my soup I'll leave you alone, how about that?" he smiled at you as he grabbed the soup and sat crisscrossed on your guy's bed. You laughed, weakly. Now was your chance, you thought. You grinned

"If.. I ate the soup, could you stay the whole day, perhaps?" you asked. Your face flushed up as he nodded.

"Sure, but Only if you eat it. I spent my whole soul on that." he playfully nudges your leg.

Fuck, he was a sarcastic mother fucker. Again, you loved him for that. You grinned widely as you happily grabbed the soup and spoon that came along with it, opening the container, and going wild on the soup, wasn't as bad as you thought. He kept telling you to slow down. A little while after, he broke the silence as he continued to stare into your eyes. "I hmm.. You're quite a handsome man, ____," he muttered as he scratched his head awkwardly. You would have started to feel better about the situation.

"Thank you, Jonny. I.. really appreciate it." you smiled softly as you set down the soup on the bedside table. Jonathan's face was flustered as shit. You sat on your knees to face him, your cough was slowly weakening, so this wouldn't be as awkward. Jonathan got an idea. He crawled over the top of your bed, laying his back against the headboards. With his legs spread out on the bed. He smiled softly, tapping his thigh.

"Here, if you want you could rest your head on my lap. If you.. Wanted to." he got quiet at the end of his sentence muttering. You smiled and cupped his cheek softly as your hand glided up the back of his head, interlocking your fingers with his dreads.

"If I get you sick, don't blame me." you laughed a little as you looked into his eyes.

"Just come here and fucking kiss me you fag." He said playfully as he placed his hands on your face, pulling you into a passionate but rough kiss. You moaned softly as you placed your hands on his hips, guiding yourself onto his lap. You pull away from the kiss he chuckles as he gives you one last quick kiss.

"Now you're going to get sick." You sorely laughed.

“It's worth it if it means I can be with you," he mutters as he places his forehead against yours, closing his eyes. You giggled as you placed your head into the crevice of his neck. Jon placed his arms on your chest, caressing your scars. He mumbled some words into your shoulder and you both held each other in a tight embrace." I love your scars baby. I love how they feel, they fit you too, it makes you look manly." you smiled and let out a few coughs.

"Thank you, Jonny," you mumbled into his ear then wrapped your legs around his waist.

"You're the best boyfriend in the whole wide world, baby. No matter what. I just wanted to tell you that no matter what happens, you can always come to me, baby. If anyone calls you mean shit or even verbally or physically hurts you just.. Come to me or just call them a cunty fag." he laughed light heartedly. You laughed as you held on tighter. "You'll always be my boy, and I love you for who you are." he started to lay down on the bed, dragging you with him. Once you guys fully lay down, he caressed the back of your head letting you fall into a deep sleep on his chest.

🪐⊹｡⋆✧｡˚⭒ ⋆ ✦ ⋆⭒˚｡✧⋆｡⊹🛸 ⊹｡⋆✧｡˚⭒ ⋆ ✦ ⋆⭒˚｡✧⋆｡⊹👽

WAZZAP‼️🤯 I understand if this fix was shitty or the grammar wasn’t right, I understand. But I had fun making this!! But I hope you liked it! {=^w^=}

#fanfic #jonathan davis #korn band #tumblr fyp #jonathan davis x reader #my fic #sickness #jd korn #jonathan davis korn #TWIST?!? #ftm trans #transgender #🤯 #🎗️

[joelsgreys]

i don’t usually leave asks like this bc the last thing i wanna do is make someone feel pressured to write and im also just shy,,, but i just have to say that i physically can not wait to read the next chapter of a safe haven.

it is genuinely one of my favourite joel fics. the relationship that’s been nurtured between him and the reader? the way ellie looks out for her and is full-on ready for her to be part of their little duo? and the ticking time-bomb that seems to be whatever is gonna go down between luke and joel? oooh it’s all so good, it’s genuinely addictive. the way you’ve written this fic has me clinging to the edge of my seat. anyway, can’t wait for luke to eat shit <3

Hello! first off, you definitely aren’t making me feel pressured at all, I think it’s so sweet of you to drop into my inbox, especially if you’re a bit shy and it might be out of your comfort zone so thank you, it means a lot! 🥹

this ask truly made my evening, I’m about to get emosh so…you have been warned, potential essay incoming (but I’ll try really hard not to)

I’ve put so much effort into Joel and reader’s relationship and making it special despite that it’s a hidden relationship/affair. My biggest concern was that people would find it skeevy or it would give them major ick since it IS an affair and my goal was to keep that from happening and instead create a relationship that, while painful, is still beautiful in a way, if that makes sense?

ELLIE my beloved little shithead. Her bond with Peach is SO SO special to me. Peach looked out for her from the get go, now Ellie looks out for her and she truly does fit right in with the duo, she is a part of their family already.

The time bomb is indeed ticking, and I think I can safely say that anyone who reads this story is also ready for Luke to eat shit and I totally get it lmao I never thought I could write a character people would hate so much and I did it. Kinda proud of myself for that ngl 😂

seriously thank you for coming into my inbox and dropping some kindness about my baby into it, it means the absolute fucking world 🤍

#vee answers #fic: a safe haven