#ben affleck coffee
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Thursday, January 4.
Existential Ben Affleck.
Well it's January 4, after all—indeed it cannot be anything else. And nothing quite distills the suffocating existential weight quite like another image of Ben Affleck trying, and failing, to carry out the most menial tasks of the day. There is a little Ben Affleck in all of us.
So once you're done staring at the sad, widening pool of coffee at your feet, come celebrate this gaping abyss of a month with a series of Affleck-inspired gazes into the void.
@batfleckgifs
#today on tumblr#ben affleck#up against it#ben affleck is on the struggle bus#ben affleck coffee#ben affleck smoking.jpg#dunkin donuts#donuts#spillage#misfortune#existentialism#existential dread#existential crisis#existential thoughts#the void
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Ben Affleck & Dunkin Donuts
#ben affleck#dunkin donuts#dunkin#coffee#ice coffee#Dunkin Munchkins#face reaction#believe in boston t-shirt#celebrity#Paparazzi#hollywood#funny#photo#ruined weeknd#okletsgetnuts
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Coffe with love ❤️
#jennifer lopez#jlo#ben affleck#bennifer#love#couple goals#couple#los angeles#stabucks#santamonica#coffee
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the (corporate coffee chain) barista experience is. agony
#shoosh vale#yes i know it says the corporate coffee place in the tweets but the image is not searchable <3#really feeling ben affleck smoking despondently.jpg about it all today
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Woman Gets Her Iced Coffee From Ben Affleck At Dunkin Donuts, Shares Pic
Woman Gets Her Iced Coffee From Ben Affleck At Dunkin Donuts, Shares Pic
We all have one specific meals or drink that we’re hooked on. It generally is a chilled glass of Coca-Cola, a cheeseburger and fries or something that we routinely eat to satiate our cravings. Grabbing these meals gadgets from the shop or restaurant has its personal pleasure the place we frequently queue up and wait patiently for the meals. And, as soon as we get our order, all we now have to do…
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mmmmmmmmmm mitsuya is possessive. he loves cumming on you or inside you. does not want a single drop to go to waste. fucks his cum back in or collects the globs on his fingers n makes you swallow it if he can’t stuff it back inside your pussy </3 jsbfhshchhshchdhd its 3:30 in the morning over here 🗿
😔 oh :((( i hate him sm
#mooticles - ♥︎#he's so.#SO#you know?#you know that meme of ben affleck#i think thats what his name is#the one where he looks tired n just done with life#thats me rn#being run ragged between mitsuya draken and the haitanis#pouring myself a coffee today's gonna be a long day
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that sillygoofy dunkin donuts ben affleck photoset going around is for an ad btw. if you look closely you can see his deceptively twisted ankle and relatable iced coffee are actually camouflage evolved to lure prey in, much like the angler fish and various ant-mimicking aphids. this is called aggressive mimicry
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Please explain the timeline for pe!
Following October of 2022, keep an open, flexible mind to the dates and time. Here’s Chris and pe!reader’s relationship timeline.
2011
Chris first publicly spoke about having pe!reader as his celebrity crush during the NYC comic con.
2012
July - pe!reader starts filming The Spectacular Now alongside Miles Teller as the two leads.
August - pe!reader and Miles Teller are spotted on a date.
October - pe!reader and Miles are official.
2013
February - pe!reader and Miles Teller go public.
October - pe!reader and Miles’ first anniversary.
2014
March - pe!reader and Chris meet for the first time at Vanity Fair’s Oscar afterparty.
September - pe!reader and Miles break up.
November 28th - pe!reader and Chris meet again in private Interstellar release-celebratory party hosted by Christopher and Jonathan Nolan and hang out the entire night together. They exchange phone numbers.
November 30th - pe!reader and Chris go out for coffee.
December 5th - pe!reader and Chris go undercover to the movies to watch Wild.
December 7th - • Chris invites pe!reader over to cook for her, burns the meal and gets her her favorite takeout after googling it. • pe!reader and Chris were about to kiss but she stopped so they can take it slow.
December 24th - pe!reader and Chris are papped together.
December 27th - They have their own late christmas celebration at pe!reader’s New York apartment with Dakota Johnson, Jennifer Garner & Ben Affleck, Blake Lively & Ryan Reynolds, pe!reader’s best 3 best friends from theatre; Jia, Sophia, and Raymond.
2015
January - Chris realizes that he has strong feelings for pe!reader.
February - pe!reader realizes that she has strong feelings for Chris but chooses not to act on them because she wants to take more time to know him and be friends.
February 22nd - Chris and pe!reader are talked about when they greet with cheek kisses at the Oscars.
March - They frequently meet at each other’s houses as to not get papped.
April - Chris is busy with Avengers: Age of Ultron’s release.
May - First kiss and first date.
June - pe!reader is busy with Inside Out’s release.
July - They reunite with more dates and get papped once.
August - pe!reader meets Scott, and decides to stop going on talk shows and interviews unless it’s movie press.
September 21st - Chris and pe!reader make it official before she goes to Australia to start filming Hacksaw Ridge.
October - Chris watches pe!reader’s SNL monologue from the audience but it’s kept lowkey.
November - pe!reader and Chris decide to go public and are papped:
December - Hacksaw Ridge wraps up. pe!reader hosts a bigger Christmas party where people fawn over them as a couple.
December 31st - pe!reader and Chris spend the New Year’s together.
2016
January - pe!reader and Chris go to the Bahamas for a secret one-week getaway.
February - pe!reader and Chris make their red carpet debut as a couple at the Oscars & she meets the rest of the Evans’ family.
March - Chris meets pe!reader’s family, gets interrogated by her 7-year-old sister, Madelyn, but they welcome him.
April - Chris and pe!reader’s stepdad, Marshall, are papped golfing.
May - pe!reader decides to direct Lady Bird. Captain America: Civil War premieres. They make their Met Gala red carpet debut as a couple.
June - pe!reader hosts a huge surprise birthday party for Chris, and also celebrates CACW with him. They go all the way. She starts filming Mother!
July - pe!reader is papped having breakfast with Chris’ mom, Lisa.
August - Mother! wraps up. filming Lady Bird starts, Chris is papped visiting pe!reader on set and stays for one week in Sacramento with her.
September - • pe!reader and Chris celebrate their 1st anniversary. • First big fight. • pe!reader and Chris are papped on her NY apartment’s balcony
• pe!reader sues the photographer and their agency for violating her privacy and photographing a private property.
October - • Lady Bird wraps up, Chris hosts a celebratory party for pe!reader and the entire cast and crew. • pe!reader and Chris go on a 5-day trip to the Amalfi Coast. • pe!reader starts therapy after her role as Mother in Mother! took a toll on her mental health.
November - pe!reader moves in with Chris at his house in Boston.
December - Chris moves in with pe!reader at her NY apartment.
2017
January - • pe!reader rescues her, then, kitten, Pam and is hers and Chris’ first shared pet. • pe!reader visits Chris on Infinity War set, meets the entire cast
February - Pregnancy scare!
April - Chris adopts Dodger and he becomes their second shared pet.
September - • Second anniversary! • pe!reader wins Emmy award for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series for her role in The Handmaid’s Tale, briefly and vaguely mentions Chris in her speech.
November - Chris buys an engagement ring and tells his mom only about it.
December - pe!reader and Chris buy a house together in Italy.
2018
January - pe!reader and Chris go together to the Golden Globes. Lady Bird wins Best Motion Picture. pe!reader gives an emotional speech and thanks Chris in it.
February - Chris takes pe!reader to Disneyland in Paris for Valentine’s day.
March - • Chris is busy with Infinity War press. • pe!reader launches her skin care brand, Bare.
April - pe!reader joins Chris for the first time as his plus one for the Infinity War movie premiere despite that she doesn’t go to other movie premieres.
May - • pe!reader sets her LA house on sale. • Chris and pe!reader buy a new house in LA together. • pe!reader buys a private island at the Bahamas. • pe!reader and Chris attend Prince Harry & Meghan’s royal wedding together.
June - Chris proposes and she says yes! They celebrate all month with family and friends.
September 21st - Third anniversary!
2019
February - pe!reader becomes an EGOT winner after winning a Grammy for Best Spoken Word Album (Including Poetry, Audiobooks & Storytelling) for being the official narrator of the book, Circe.
March - • pe!reader hosts a big anniversary party for Bare. • Chris celebrates her on his own and buys her a 1967 Cadillac De Ville convertible car.
April - pe!reader joins Chris as his plus one again at the Endgame premiere and is papped crying emotionally because of Chris’ journey in Marvel coming to an end.
May - pe!reader buys Chris a yacht with ‘Property of Christopher Evans, with love, Y/N Y/L/N-Evans’ engraved on it. They’re papped.
June - They get married in Italy! They spend their honeymoon in Seychelles then went to Greece.
September - • Fourth anniversary! • They buy their farmhouse.
2020
September 21st: Fifth anniversary!
2021
March: pe!reader wins her fourth Golden Globe for Best Actress for Promising Young Woman.
April: • pe!reader receives her third Oscar for Best Actress for Promising Young Woman and thanks Chris so adorably in her speech. • They start trying for a baby!
September: • Sixth anniversary! • pe!reader wins her third Emmy award for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series for her role in The Handmaid’s Tale.
November: pe!reader and Chris get a false-positive pregnancy test because of her fertility medications.
2022
January: • pe!reader is pregnant! • They tell their families two weeks later.
February: They tell their close friends.
June: Chris announces the pregnancy on his Instagram when she’s 6 months pregnant.
July: pe!reader joins Chris for The Gray Man LA premiere and gets seen pregnant in an event for the first time.
September 14th: River Jude Evans is born. pe!reader announces a hiatus.
October: They move to stay at their farmhouse away from all the noise to raise River there for a year.
From that time forward, time truly is an illusion. Pe!reader and Chris will have 3 more kids and unless I write about this fic until 2028, I advise you read this fic with a grain of salt. Thanks for reading!
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#today on tumblr#ben affleck#ben affleck smoking.jpg#ben affleck coffee#existentialism#existential crisis#existential dread#coffee ben#ben affleck is on the struggle bus
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Hypnotized Help: Ben
"Could I take your luggage, sir?" the actor promptly asks each of my arriving guests.
Ben Affleck was proving to be the perfect bellboy, which was no surprise. I'd basically carved the job description into his head.
My friends are all staying at my mansion to enjoy a summer of only the best that money can buy; the finest foods, oldest wines, and an army of servants to wait on our every need, and I mean every need.
There's not much my hypnotized workers won't do.
Of course, an event of this scale has required a larger staff, but I've been able to train dozens of new recruits. I knew I needed someone specifically to haul everyone's bags to their rooms, so I orchestrated a run-in with the A-list actor while he was grabbing coffee.
He was completely unamused until I dropped him into a trance and explained how much he wanted to get in my car with me. I brought him back to the mansion and reconditioned all of his thoughts and beliefs.
He's still the same old Ben Affleck, but now he's willing to drop everything at a moment's notice to dress up as a bellhop when his master wants one. The man is good at it too. His strong arms and wide gate are practically made for hauling bags and suitcases up the stairs. His uniform might be a little gaudy, but his broad shoulders fill it out handsomely. He's been carrying luggage and leading guests to their rooms all morning, but he doesn't seem tired of it at all.
"Bellboy!" I demand his attention as he attends to one of my last guests.
"Yes, master?" he pauses to control his heavy breaths.
"You remember what you do after you help all the guests to their room, right?"
"Yes, master," his eyes unfocus as he recalls what I taught him, "I will report to each room a second time and offer to unpack their belongings for them. I will be sure to treat their belongings with the utmost respect."
"That's right," I smile at my good work, "Carry on."
"Yes, master," he nods and whips around to deliver the final suitcases to their room, but my guest lingers with me. He's an old college buddy of mine, and if I remember correctly, he's always been a fan of Batman movies.
"This place is insane," he laughs before quietly adding, "So you said he's still hypnotized, right?"
"Yup, completely under my control."
"So can I...?"
"You can do whatever you want with him, bro. I don't care," I explain before calling out to the bellhop, "Hey Ben!"
"Yes, master?" he once again holds the luggage steady and turns around.
"Don't forget to offer my guests a tip. I know it's usually done the other way around, but you're the one who needs to pay the gratuity here. Since, you don't have money on you, you'll have to ask each guest individually how to repay them. Got it?"
"Yes, master," Ben Affleck responds with a nervous glance at the guest.
My friend's jaw drops.
"Holy crap," he stammers, "What should I make Ben-freaking-Affleck do?"
"Anything, dude! Make the guy iron your shirts or shine your shoes," I suggest, "Or make him do something about that tent in your pants."
My guest blushes before eagerly catching up to the bellhop. The actor leads him up the grand staircase and through ornately decorated halls, but my buddy's eyes are only looking at the actor's rear end. Ben might not enjoy tipping all my guests, but my friend is definitely about to enjoy the hell out of it.
This is bound to be a good summer...
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Coffee mug with the Ben Affleck picture on it
I don't know why I'm surprised that this exists. Thank you, internet, for having my back on this one
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Ben teniendo al mismo tiempo a JLO y un Ice Coffe = 😍🤤❤️
#jennifer lopez#jlo#ben affleck#bennifer#love#coffee#dunkin#los angeles#santamonica#hot cuple#couple#couple goals
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Mads how would birthday!reader react to the clip of Matty in the influencers video? i feel like there’s some good meme potential from her side
you repost to your story like "she looks fantastic but what the fuck is that coffee-carrying cryptid that appears a little while in. sleep paralysis demon fr" and then the rest of the day your story is just the same screenshot of matty from the vid with varying meme captions - his favourite (begrudging favourite, i may add) is when you likened it to the ben affleck exasperation memes lmfao, but you're proud of the "me having a nice day/goodreads one star review of the new book" tagged on the girl and matty respectively lol. any chance to meme matty, you'll take. mother fr
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[ID: A TMA redrawing of the meme of Ben Affleck smoking on a balcony with an exhausted-and-all-out-of-shits expression, featuring Gerard Keay in Genoa. The picture is much brighter, and Gerry is wearing a pink and orange Hawaiian shirt with eye cameos. On the balcony is a glass of iced coffee with a straw and a pink umbrella. Signed: Meaningless Mikhail.]
When you were doing such a good job at sightseeing, but the sight you see is actually a doomed woman only you can save.
#gerry keay#mikhail draws#tma#tma meme#gerard keay fanart#gerry keay fanart#the magnus archives#the magnus archives fanart#vacation gerry#this boy is getting a bad grade in Vacation tim needs to teach him
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Get to know me tag game
Thanks @somethingsteff and @wibzenadarksiderwithasoftheart for the tag! ❤️
Adding that @ineffableobikin tagged me too! ❤️
Putting it under the cut since there’s a lot of rambling…
3 ships: Obikin (x3 lol) - Right now, they’re my only ship. This is going to sound lame, but I can’t casually ship characters. I go insane for my ships. Like they consume my life. I only have time for Obikin at the moment and they’re destroying me.
first ever ship: Scully/Mulder - Yep. That’s how old I am lol. I wrote my first X-files fanfic while I was in HS, but it wasn’t until college that I realized that’s what I was doing. Back then, the internet was just a baby and there was no fanfiction.net or LJ or AO3. X-files fanfics were housed on gossamer and when I found it, it was like this awakening for me that other people did this too. That’s also how I discovered smut. Good times lol.
last song: “Better Place” by *NSync - I’m just really enjoying this wave of 90s/00s nostalgia we’ve been getting. JC is the best vocalist in *NSync. Fight me.
last movie: Inside Out - Don’t fucking talk to me about Bing Bong 😭
currently reading: This is another lame answer, but I haven’t read a book in years. I have to read a lot of technical documents for work. And when I have time, I read fanfic. I have a huge backlog I’m trying to get through. Right now I’m reading Solsbury Hill by @grapenehifics (obsessed with it) and also In Pursuit of Cold Water by JSwander.
currently watching: Ahsoka and the Halston miniseries
currently consuming: Tazo Zen tea with honey because I still have a sore throat from being sick earlier this week
currently craving: a large Dunkies iced coffee with a shot of caramel swirl and toasted almond. Yes, hi, I’m Ben Affleck.
tagging anyone who sees this and wants to share!
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