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#cause it feels like the most iconic
mxrisacoulter · 1 year
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endless gifs of marisa coulter ~(33/?)
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aibyoutachi · 8 months
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persona touhou au how about that
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here, take reimari genderbend souyo
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skitskatdacat63 · 11 months
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2009 Monaco Grand Prix - Jenson Button(ft. Rubens Barrichello)
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aromacaque · 6 months
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the more exhausted i get the significantly more dry and sarcastic my humor gets help me if i don't indicate my tone i WILL come across as an asshole
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todayisafridaynight · 10 months
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NO LISTEN. LISTEN. I CONCEALED THE TITLE ON PURPOSE BECAUSE... IDK what it is but I have a tendency to like things that would be hard to watch for one reason or another for MOST of the runtime but then by the end it's like Oh So This Was GOOD Actually? Oh So My Brain Is Rewired?
And then it just becomes IMPOSSIBLE to recommend because I have no idea if The Majority Of It would actually be worth the conclusion to anyone but me😭😭😭SP is along those lines, sort of, but I've at least seen success with that... but this is also the case for my favorite Tsutsumi movie of all time, actually... alas...
Nevertheless. The show is called After the Rain! I think it was originally a manga and it has a live-action adaptation too [criminal not to actually cast Tsutsumi in either In My Opinion but FINE I GUESS]. It's about a former track star in high school, Akira Tachibana, who works part-time at a restaurant and has the MOST EMBARRASSING crush on her manager, Masami Kondo, the character I showed you before, who is Tsutsumi But As A Middle-Aged Divorcee With A Son. They befriend each other and help each other come to grips with the future and the past, respectively.
I was afraid of the obvious because a lot of media that tries to do this ends up making it fucking weird... like, this sort of dynamic means a lot to me for personal reasons and I've been burned too many times by characters I'd come to love and trust... but naw... my man Kondo is Normal About It that's all that matters to me... I had to breathe SUCH a sigh of relief...
I really don't like that the camera is sometimes not normal about Akira, though, it undermines the actual themes of the show a bit. IDK, I'm hypersensitive, I expect it's nothing super egregious compared to a lot of other media, but it's just disappointing because SOMETIMES there's artistic merit in terms of representing what Akira's feeling and other times it's just totally unnecessary and introduces a tonal clash... SPEAKING OF THERE IS A GUY WHO IS NOT NORMAL ABOUT AKIRA AND THE ENTIRE PLOT THREAD IS BASICALLY JUST DROPPED BECAUSE HE'S HARDLY EVEN IN THE SHOW AFTER THAT... I WANTED CONSEQUENCES...
But if nothing else, that's not even exactly why I said it's a hard watch, the actual reason is the NUCLEAR levels of secondhand embarrassment for like two thirds of the show. Like GIRL he is NOT INTO YOU AND HE SHOULDN'T BE... GET A GRIP OH MY GODDDDDDDD................. but like, I was That Girl when I was her age, right, so the fact it had me imploding thinking back on everything is a testament to its accuracy overall. Probably.
And NGL that type of dynamic is basically how I conceptualize RGGJo and Arakawa when they first met... Jo and Akira may be cringe-ass teens but I got a soft spot for it I do... it can be FUNNY... it can be WHOLESOME...
All of that being said, the last third or so might as well be a different show, and it kind of blows the rest out of the water for me. Maybe because it focuses on Kondo and Akira separately? But it's free of literally anything I could possibly complain about. I ain't mad about the first two thirds, it does set up a lot of what made the last third so enjoyable... buuut...
ANYWAY that's ENOUGH OF THAT I am CUTTING MYSELF OFF THERE I've gone on for WAY TOO LONG ABOUT SHIT NOBODY ASKED ABOUT☠️Not like you can say anything to All That I just don't have anybody to talk to about it☠️and despite the fact I'm still not REALLY Recommending It and don't think it sounds appealing from my description, I feel like I probably shouldn't talk about the endgame stuff I'm obsessed with so☠️☠️☠️Anyway. If NOTHING Else. Funny as hell to have Tsutsumi as the basis for The Perfect Middle-Aged Man... SOOO true...
YAYA the DQXI demo goes like, up to just after you get the? Twins? in your party. And you can keep playing the game without progressing the story + continue your save in the full game so technically speaking I COULD grind until I'm overpowered... but I shan't... I'm not positive when I'm getting it since I still wanna play the series in order... For Ichiban... [<- see this is RGG-related now]
It is SO sick to actually get to play though, that's awesome! Toriyama's worked on some bangers what can I say... My first DQ was one of the DS remakes, probably DQV, but the only DQ game I've ever actually finished was the Rocket Slime spinoff. Very Fun By The Way genuinely one of my favorite DS titles... but THAT'S NEITHER HERE NOR THERE... regardless... Arachtagon is not in the demo but I can believe he's a bitch to fight given one of the top results is this ☠️
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So I'm glad you're past it and are having fun with the game :] I loved your comic SOOO SO SO much so having that bit of background on makes it all the more enjoyable! I had my own comic about RGGJo losing his mind "babysitting" Ichi and watching him grind for hours on end which was also lowkey about my experience with DQI... lol... lmao even...
I'M SORRYYYYYY THOUGH I TOLD YOU SP WAS SLOW TO START FOR A REASON 😭😭😭😭It took me a while to notice but title sequences are always something like Episode III Part I so they're almost all multi-ep arcs... threw me for a loop... Okay that's enough from me Jesus fucking Christ I am SORRY for going on this long but just I have to say:
inoue's chara is so funny like He's Super Human um doc… i think he's just autistic lowkey….. he still a baller regardless tho
REAL AND TRUE AND REAL AND TRUE AND REAL AND
and i've already added it to the To-Watch list :) NO BUT REAL I UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL- in trying to sell something but having to be like Here Me Out I Swear on it BUT I BELIEVE YOU THAT ITS GOOD. i know i can trust your word on something and i def appreciate the preemptive notes given before watching. im sure i'll enjoy it in the end: it looks cute and im glad it sounds like it's doing something better with a Touchy trope ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶ biggest RIP to no tsutsumi in the live action but... cant be helped.....
NO BUT IT'S SO FUNNY CAUSE FOR MY COMIC I WANTED TO SEE WHAT OTHER PEOPLE'S 'HARDEST BOSSES' WERE AND I FELT SO SEEN IN SEEING ARACHTAGON AS AN OPTION..... funnily enough tho when i redid the fight it wasnt nearly as nightmarish as it was when i first did it but Again i think i was just better prepared... (also during my first attempt i had Literally the most fuck ass luck where my team kept getting stunned and dying but rab kept bringing them back to life and i Just Couldnt Die or even move so... Horrible First Experience Ruined A Game For Seven Months For Me (  ̄▽ ̄ ;;;;)). the first instance of DQ i remember seeing was DQIX and being liek 'hey they looks familiar :)' and ive just been watchin it since 🤭 ROCKET SLIME IS SO CUTE THOUGH if you had to finish ANY of the games im glad it was that one... i wish i got to play the series in order since I Like Doing That but im annoying about wanting to play things on The Official Console...
AH BUT IVE ALWAYS LIKED THE IDEA OF JO WATCHING ICHI PLAY A GAME i mentioned i had an abandoned comic about it but its still such a silly and cute idea.. id very much like to do something with it someday if not see others have fun with it cause i think they should have them silly family moments too..
NO IT'S OK I JUST FOUND IT FUNNY AN ARC WAS LIKE. 3-4 EPS WHEN AT MOST THEY'RE LIKE TWO i'm just about rapping up the ohashi arc and its SOOOOO good... i also love how the drama has a pretty diverse soundtrack that i notice a lot of other jdramas lack so thats DEF been a bonus plus all of the choreography (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) and real. inoue Is Just Neurodivergent that got solidified within me after seeing him mess around with that riddle book ☠️
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the-night-puncher · 2 years
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The pretty little liars finale had me screaming it was everything... but if i could complain about one thing:
get the principal out of there. Im sorry to this man but he is not bringing what he though he was, the acting was just not on the same level.
and its so unecessary too just let my boy big A do it all. He already is insane horror movie level of competence why not just let him be the mastermind
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sometimes i wonder if i'm depressed or not but then i go over my old poetry and not only do i 100% confirm that's the case but that that's been the case for a while now lmao
#anyways after finishing going through my first poetry notebook (yes there's more than one lol) i can conclude i only write about 4 things#which i guess it's nice cause i could publish four poemaries with each distinct topic lmao#but like half of the poems are like 'i'm broken nobody likes me the darkness engulfs me' and like... i get that i was writing to canalize#all those feelings#and it worked#but like as someone who's actively trying to get better it's a bit rough#there's some poems here and there that i really like tho#and the poems that are not about me are pretty okay too i really enjoy them#i have a bunch about the sea and the nature and the moon and the stars#those are nice i like those#i wanna write more of them#the most iconic ones are#one eulogy i wrote about my dead friend#i was really impressed cause i don't remember writing it and i like it a lot#a series of poems i wrote while at the beach house and were heavily inspired by sea imaginery#and one depressed poem about listening to olivia rodrigo on my bedroom floor which yeah#for what i understand i am better at either vague / whimsical poems that talk about nature or fantasy characters or whatever#totally unrelated to myself and my experiences#and also ones that are extremelly personal and specific like the olivia rodrigo one or the eulogy#most of the times i just write personal poems that are also kinda vague and those are the most meh for me#so i learned from this experience :) i'll keep that in mind next time i sit to write some poetry
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andthebeanstalk · 1 year
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It's important to play a "LEVEL UP!" sound effect in your head whenever you get better at a skill because the world is flawed and so this does not happen automatically.
Often, in this life, we must provide our own sound effects.
#original#life advice#you can read this as a metaphor but i literally do mean that today i learned a lot about drawing backgrounds and upon surveying my work#i took a moment to imagine - as vividly as i could - a garbled video game announcer voice going LEVEL UP#it's garbled because sound files on classic video games were compressed as fuck and i am imagining like... a ps1 era game.#the kind where it holds up really well to this day and in all of the continuing sequels they#still use a lot of the same sound effects because they're so recognizable and iconic. I can picture the graphics and everything.#what does yours sound like or look like?#it isn't actually important that you do this specific thing but it is good to recognize when you're getting better at something#my favorite thing about learning to draw is when I can focus on a really good tutorial and#improve a skill so quickly that it really feels like I filled out a skill tree with my XP#it isn't always an immediate improvement but i am so low level in background illustration that i still level up with just a little XP#whereas if I want to get better at drawing expressions I don't think there is a single tutorial that will cause me to level up on its own.#just because this is the thing I've always focused on for most of my life and so a lot of the tutorials don't have new information for me#so that skill is at a point where it's just gonna improve slowly as i practice and pick up tips over time.#but I know so little about drawing shops or castles that literally one page of information is increasing my knowledge by 20% at least#Pro tip: the Etherington Brothers tutorials are so good and I was able to find several hundred for free on their website#so good#etherington brothers#how to think when you draw
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star-mum · 4 months
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tis time for me to change my phone theme (took longer than I thought it would tbh)
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tinapaysmp · 4 months
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I've come to realize that my salmon bias in this fanbase is growing worse and worse as the days come.
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blackpearlblast · 5 months
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[ID: drawings of a golem animated by a palestinian flag painted on its forehead. it is seen: holding out its arms protectively in front of a crowd of children, the children also hold each other supportively; catching an air strike missile from the air and throwing it away or crushing it in its fist; turning its back so that a child can warm her hands by the earth oven built into its back, food in a pot is cooking on the fire and a boy holds a cup of steaming tea to his face and enjoys the aroma; clearing away rubble so a man can help up his wife who was buried underneath, she is clutching a baby to her chest; stooping down to look at a kitten a young boy is holding up to show it; and dissolving small flakes of clay from its finger into a glass of water, purifying it. end ID]
@fairuzfan asked people to create and share art for the strike. i wrote an artist statement and then set about trying to draw what i envisioned. artist statement below.
This golem is a protector that I wish I could gift to the children and adults in Gaza. The flag on its forehead is to show that love for the Palestinian people is an animating force for people fighting for a free Palestine all over the world, especially for those in Palestine who are trying to free themselves and their people. Love is the motivation for the call for a free Palestine, not hatred like people try to claim. It is very strong and fast and can catch air strikes out of midair and crush them to dust or throw them back in the direction they came from. It can lift all the rubble of a collapsed building very quickly so nobody can get trapped underneath. It has an earth oven in its back with an ever-burning flame that people can use to warm themselves and cook food and heat water to use to bathe themselves or make tea. Pieces of its clay can be crumbled up and mixed into water to make even the most brackish and unclean water pure and safe to drink.
The golem is always a bit of a tragic figure so I don't imagine it staying around forever once Palestine is free and it is no longer needed. I think it would use its great strength to help rebuild the destroyed houses, churches, schools, universities, hospitals, and mosques and then dive into the Jordan river and dissolve. It would clean the river of all pollution and make the water splash up over all the newly replanted fruit trees, causing them to grow big and strong. Its love for Palestine and its people can be tasted in the fruit they grow for generations.
I choose a specifically Jewish icon of protection because of how it feels to witness such horrors done in the supposed name of Judaism and the Jewish people. For many anti-zionist Jews, we feel like we are acting directly within the teachings of our stories and communities by opposing this genocide. It is difficult to understand how the very people and institutions who taught us these values now fight against them so fiercely. While obviously I would still oppose Israel were I not Jewish, the way I oppose Israel is directly informed by my Jewishness. I hope that someday, somehow, Judaism can bring as much joy and support to the Palestinian people as it has brought grief and destruction. That Jewish symbols used in the name of love and justice will bear more significance than the ones used in shows of hatred. Knowing the depth of the harm caused, I do not know if this is possible. But this artwork and everything I have dedicated myself to these past few months and continue to dedicate myself to in the future is born from this hope. I love you. Thank you for being on this planet with me. From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free! And it will be beautiful.
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emystic · 6 months
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@s1lxcs replied for a starter with Trixy
"I got so more food for us, so eat up, okay?"
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The child was wearing cheap pair of sunglasses and a face mask she stole from a convenience store the earlier this morning. Figuring if she wore them then even if she comes back to take something else they won't recognize her. Taking off the mask and glasses with her feline like eyes glowing brightly for a moment to readjust her eyesight once more.
She snagged a lot of snacks, juices, and pre-made sandwiches in her torn and wore down satchel bag. Taking two of the jam sandwich packages out and offering one of them to him.
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trans-leek-cookie · 7 months
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I feel like Snake's "mass handstand" resonant event example is like the Most tangent. Hard to explain but everyone else is like "here's a chemistry thing or a time travel thing or a science thing" and just. Handstand
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softgrungeprophet · 10 months
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obviously i did choose to use the backstory from SM and Power-Pack #1 for my AU but that was largely for plot parallel reasons and tying together, basically, Peter, Gwen, Janine and Kaine all as parallel characters in a small way (though gwen will be spared for the most part but obvs still shaken by being attacked), but I'm ngl the more I have read of various comics, as well as screenshots of various scenes i haven't gotten to quite yet, the more it dooooes feel kind of believable as a backstory from a character standpoint
obviously peter has always been a fighter even as a child and got in 6v1 fistfights and so on, and that's something i always keep in mind cause his anger etc. is really so key to his personality including as a kid, but (and i don't mean in a shy quiet way but rather an inability to say "no" way) he seems to struggle a lot with asserting himself/his boundaries in unwanted romantic/sexual situations like... on a recurring basis (at least in the 80s but i wanna say it was other eras too), so the notion that an older boy who he thought was his friend would be able to coerce him that way doesn't feel like much of a stretch at all really, esp for a small kid who looked to be somewhere around 10 or 12 at the time
i guess it depends on what comics you look at though and how much weight you give to issues from specific years. i'm realizing a lot of the examples i can think of ARE from the 80s lmao
i have like screenshots and notes in my timeline doc lol but i'm just musing, not trying to make a like, Rebloggable Meta Post. just something i was thinking about recently after reading some miscellaneous comics including more of Jenkins' which arguably has at least two instances of (attempted) sexual assault if you count the symbiote bonding with Peter against his will (which considering the blatant domestic abuse subtext for venom in the comic, i think it's fair to count that as a parallel to sexual assault even if it's not exactly that), as well as, of course, the Spider Queen kissing him against his will while he's immobilized (though peter did manage to fight back)
of course that comic is from the early 2000s so it postdates SM&PP #1 by like. 20 years.—idk if Jenkins was thinking about that comic (but who knows, I'M using it almost 40 years after the fact so...) or if it's just that peter is sexually harassed kind of often enough in minor ways throughout regular-ass spidey comics for situations like that to just fall into place
for jenkins though it does make sense because the really strongly recurring throughline in his runs on spider-man just based on what i have read (piecemeal, randomly, probably about half of both?) have been peter's sense of being adrift, uncertain and in many cases helpless, and he explores that a lot via both current events in both his PPSM and TSSM runs (including the plot with flash's coma), as well as flashbacks to like, Peter's stage fright as a child—whether or not you consider that in-character (i don't think it's wildly ooc cause it does seem like peter's confidence is strongly situational but i'm never quite sure whether i think it fits or not. i'm certainly not opposed to it), it's definitely part of an ongoing theme in his Spectacular run specifically, juxtaposing his sense of being lost and confused with his anger and love and stuff like that (the contrasts between the gentle way he touches his loved ones vs. the vicious way he fights Otto... chef kiss, ty ramos). i thought the scenes in the final issue were also interesting cause it has the stage fright stuff but it also has the nightmare scene where peter is naked (again, helpless and vulnerable) and the villains all around him are threatening to do awful things to him which they refuse to tell him.
idk if i'd say it's fully at sexual assault symbolism but there does feel like a hint of that there just because of the lack of specificity and peter's nudity in the dream plus the earlier stuff i mentioned w/ venom and the spider queen. i do like the stage bow at the end cause there's this strong sense of spider-man being peter's shield against the world and the symbolism of him basically existing to protect his child self (also a theme with several of the supporting cast members, in other comics by other writers, namely flash and harry)
of course that's just one author (in case you can't tell i am a little bit into Jenkins' writing 😂😂😂 he does whiff sometimes (more than sometimes) but when he hits he just really gets it for me, personally)
other earlier comics like ASM #230 and issues relevant to that plot/its characters (from 1982, so pre-dating the child molestation PSA/backstory issue by a couple years in this case) are more lighthearted or humorous in their approach but i do think they take on some kind of discomfort in the greater context of spidey, tbh... the way peter struggles to refuse amy's advances is like, a little notable to me.
i'm sure there are other examples but anyway i was just rambling idk why i suddenly was thinking of this 😂
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thexsilentxwordsmith · 8 months
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Just a little something something for you guys...as a treat😈
When Simon's away for a while on deployment, it can get lonely. He's knows by the way your texting, when he gets the chance and can text, that you are missing him like crazy. You tell him how you can hardly wait till he returns, how your body is just aching for him something fierce.
And fuck his aching for yours too.
If he could hop on a plane, he would in an instant just to get back to you. Unfortunately, that's not something available to him at the moment.
But that doesn't mean there's nothing for him to do.
Simon knows his baby needs something to take the edge off, something to tide over that insatiable appetite for him until he can come home and fuck her proper the first chance he can get. You never asked for it, but he knew you wouldn't mind.
Ding
Your phone goes off. It's late, but youre no stranger to staying up well past dark; sometimes that was the only way you'd get a minute to talk to Simon when he was away across the world.
You check your phone. It's a text... a picture...
At first glance at the small icon on the lock screen, the image is kind of dark so you have to click on it to bring it up and when you do you nearly faint.
The caption reads: “Gotta be stealthy so they don't fuckin' catch me, but this one's for you sweetheart."
Simon is clearly propped up in his cot, his legs splayed open, shirt off. All that you can see is his thick torso with it's small speckling of light colored hair across his abs. The belt and zipper of his pants are completely undone and the waistband flung open. In one of his meaty hands he has a hold of his cock, already swollen with a little glistening at the top caught in the low light - most definitely a product from thinking of you.
You have to swallow to keep the spit from dribbling down out of the corner your mouth. Instantly you feel the heat rise in your cheeks, burning through your face as the blood pools there. It feels like you are going to pass out.
He's done it, he's taken your breath away in an instant.
Not even recovered from that glorious image your phone dings again, this time downloading something for a few seconds. Your heart pounds in your chest, your breath caught in your lungs, as you wait to see what he's done now.
Ding
It's downloaded. This time it's a video...about a minute long. Your shaky, excited finger instantly clicks play.
"Mmmm..." his breath groan hits your ears as the vision of him stroking his length plays across the screen. His voice in hushed, clearly trying to be as quiet as he can while still making sure you can hear his words. "Fuck darlin', I wish you were here... rather have that sweet little pussy 'round me than my hand."
You've stopped breathing, literally; you could hear a pin drop in the room. The video of his abdominal muscles contracting and releasing as he continues to stroke his cock is all you can focus on now. Looks like he's in the middle of things.
He groans again, his breathing getting faster. "Fuck, I miss ya luv. It's been hell not having ya near for this fuckin' long. Nearly rippin' a hole in my goddamn pants from being so fuckin hard. I swear... gonna absolutely wreck ya when I get back. Don't even bother wearing any panties cause they're gonna get shredded off ya. Nothin', and I mean fuckin' nothin' is gonna keep me from buryin' all this in ya the fuckin' second we're alone. I wanna make you cum so fuckin bad baby."
The video fades out amongst the sound of another low, gravely moan and your sanity is gone. Dear God you were a lucky one tonight. You have to take several minutes just to relearn how to function properly again so you can text him back.
Before you can do that your phone goes off once more.
Ding
One final message pops up on screen: "Think of me later when you cum, sweetheart..."
Oh, you would, you would. And maybe just to be nice...you'd send him something back too.
Part 2:
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It's a Match! || 141 x reader
[ The Prequel ] || [ Chapter 2 ]
Pairing: Gaz x Reader || 141 x gn!Reader Words: 1K~ Summary: While overcoming recent heartbreak, you decide to join Tinder in search of a rebound. Your friends advise to just Swipe Right indiscriminately... What happens when 4 soldiers from the same squad match with you?
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Chapter 1: Kyle
All of last night you and your friends spent time tinkering with your profile, putting up the sexiest pics of you that you had, some of them from Instagram, some from your camera roll, and filling in all the fields of info you could… 
And then you started checking out the profiles, definitely judging and roasting the men that popped on your screen (blame the alcohol), but always swiping right, regardless of what you (or them) thought of the most recent man on the screen.
But, once they left, you turned off the notifications and alerts from the app and went to sleep. You had acquiesced to downloading the app and making a profile, but the last thing you wanted was to be on that app constantly and get bombarded with DMs and Likes/Super-Likes…
The next day came and went and, as you sat in your kitchen after work, unboxing your take-out boxes of dinner, your group chat pinged with a text from Leah.
leah: How's Tinder going? 👀
You bit your lip and sighed as you typed out a response:
you: haven’t touched it all day bc i was at work. leah: Better touch it then!!
Rolling your eyes, you set the phone down on the table again, and locked the screen, as you began stirring the noodles you bought with your chopsticks.
Mia joined not long after with her own opinion. 
mia: ive got a good feeling about today! ur gonna find a hot bloke i know it 🫶 im sending good energyyyy!
“Yeah, right…” You grumbled. But, once again, you acquiesced and clicked on the little flame-shaped app icon.
The app lagged at first, for a good 5 seconds, and then a bunch of DMs and Like notifications pinged your phone.
You couldn’t help but chuckle to yourself… Oh, how predictable men are… They see a picture showing just a bit more skin and they try to chat the person up. But, at the same time, it made you feel quite good…
You skim through the DMs you’ve already gotten, over 99 of them… And none of them tickled your fancy. Plenty of them were variations of “Oi.”, “Hey.”, “Hi.”... Not to mention the ones that were just directly asking you to meet up right from the get-go.
Returning to the groupchat, you text your friends a screenshot of the 99+ counter on both the DMs and the Likes, which causes them to break into cheers at you.
leah: Look at you!!!! mia: i knew it. you: not into any of them tho. mia: then go back to swiping girl!
Biting back a little groan, you returned to Tinder and flicked onto the Swiping page.
Surprisingly, now that you were alone (and kind of doing it against your will), it was a lot easier for you to not get lost over-analyzing the profiles and simply… mindlessly moving your finger.
Right.
Right.
Right.
Right.
Ew, that’s a catfish of a famous male model, Report.
Right.
Right.
Right.
“Kyle.” You said softly as you read the name on your screen. He looked adorable, with a squinted ‘the-sun-is-in-my-eyes’ smile. “29… A soldier… a Brummie…” You mused as you slipped a Chinese roll past your lips and chewed.
You took a screenshot of his profile and sent it quickly to your friends’ groupchat before you returned to Tinder. As you clicked through his photo gallery, you saw the push notifications pinging at the top of the screen.
leah: HE’S STUNNING! 😫 mia: 👀👀👀👀👀 mia: smash.
Chuckling, you continue going through his pictures. “Holiday photo, holiday photo, I seriously hope those are his nephews or something, mandatory picture in uniform, and… JESUS CHRIST, a warning would’ve been NICE?!” You said to no one in particular as your jaw dropped open and you almost dropped your Chinese roll. 
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“Bloody hell… Is that sweat or baby oil?” You asked yourself as you looked at his slick, bare chest in the mirror selfie he uploaded. “And is he cupping his-” You stopped that train of thought before it could go too far from the station.
Clicking the arrow in the corner you finally brought his profile into full-screen and proceeded to find yourself chuckling at his bio. 
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His pictures were all wonderful, he looked like a guy who took care of himself, and he was funny which was the best part. 
Taking a deep breath, you press the Green heart at the bottom. A squeal escapes your mouth when the phone screen suddenly changes to the darker ‘It’s a Match!’ screen with Kyle.
Your eyes widen in surprise and, just as you press the DM button, intent on coming up with something to message him, you notice it.
Kyle: bought some shoes from a drug dealer this morning. don’t know what he laced them with but I’ve been tripping over myself all day and now think ive finally fallen for you 👀
The cheesy pick-up line has you closing your eyes and exhaling through your nose. It’s starting off terribly… But he’s the first bloke you felt inclined to text… That has to mean something, doesn’t it?
you: you fell out of a helicopter… i dont think its the shoes. i’m starting to think ur just clumsy. Kyle: holy shit you’re not a bot! let’s goooo you: a bot? you really thought that? Kyle: when someone has posted pics as cute as yours you cant help but have that worry in the back of your mind 😅 Kyle: or that ur a catfish 🤷‍♂️ you: i promise you im neither. you: and thank you. you’re cute too. Kyle: thats exactly what a bot/catfish would say 🙄 you: well how would a human talk then?? Kyle: cant tell you bc then ur gonna machine learn and start doing it you: well then how else am i supposed to prove im not either?? Kyle: let me take you out. let me get a proper good look at you. you: was that all a ploy to invite me out?? 🫠 Kyle: first time on tinder? you: that obvious huh? Kyle: a little. Kyle: so is that a yes? you: I’ll think about it. Kyle: i can work with that. 🥴 Kyle: hmu whenever youd like. no pressure. 
Maybe you would hit him up later… Once you gained enough courage to go through with the whole ‘rebound’ thing.
Biting your lip, you click off the DMs and return to the Swiping page…
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