#delayed emotional responses

[furiousgoldfish]

whenever anything happens I only know few years later how I actually feel about it

#ptsd #delayed reactions #delayed emotional responses #emotional flashbacks #not understanding the circumstances and significance of the trauma #until years later when you manage to unpack it and get a grip on what actually transpired #without being suffocated by guilt and belief that it was all your fault #except sometimes even just daily events get delayed reactions #because i was scared in the real time #and didn't get to process anything on the spot #because i was just thinking of how to get out of that situation alive

[the-ephemeral-ethereal]

The 'intermittences of the heart' are the time delays that we may any of us experience between cause and effect in our emotional lives, between some more than usually significant event and our inward response to it.

from the Introduction by John Sturrock to In Search of Lost Time, Book 4: Sodom and Gomorrah by Marcel Proust

#introduction #john sturrock #in search of lost time #sodom and gomorrah #marcel proust #proust #the intermittences of the heart #time delays #cause and effect #between cause and effect #emotional life #emotional lives #significant event #inward response

[soldier-poet-king]

Lmao bitch i THOUGHT given how much shit bro 2 has caused lately it'd be a good opportunity for me to slip in my tattoo plans without my mother's extreme disappointment and I was wrong! God forbid my mother ever approve of me or any of my decisions! Or even just neutral non judgment! Not even that I gave her forewarning rather than just showing up one day in a few months with ink! My mother never takes interest in me and my accomplishments and interests, so why would I expect anything but disappointment over something I knew she wasn't keen on in general? Oh but it's FINE if bro 1's perfect gf has tattoos (which, imo, are tacky ones but that's a matter of personal taste) but she's perfect and can do no wrong and is the feminine daughter my mother wishes she had so whatever I guess

#franposting #SCREAMS #like yes yes I bitch constantly about my dysfunctional family #and parents who are not abusive. like. they didn't hit us. we were fed #but the emotional manipulation and neglect and immaturity???? #THE UNWILLINGESS TO ACKNOWLEDGE FLAWS OR CORRECT FAULTS OR GO TO THERAPY????? #like. they barely gave a shit when i graduated with multiple degrees #idk why i expected even a NEUTRAL response to this #everytime i wake up aching from a dream where im out and loved and not constantly holding my breath #i remember that my parents are like This #and while i might have the barest tolerance i would never be loved #im not even really properly loved now #they love as well as theyre able. but tbh that isnt very well. and they dont try to improve #IM JUST. #everytime im having a decent day thinking my beautiful thinky thoughts #something like this happens #plus major subway delays #its late i got home so late #but im too angry to skip the gym no matter how much i want to #i need to be in some sort of acceptable physical pain for a bit. i have too much anger #and its really just. grief. #and i keep my mouth shut and i smile and play peacekeeper. what choice do i have? #days like today i remember when my father straight up told me that i was not the daughter my mother wanted!!!!!!!!! >:) #consider. i did not want to be a daughter at all. gender schmender. its a prison and i am first and foremost a creachure

[transpetrikov]

finally got officially diagnosed

#with what? you decide #im not this happy btw my emotional responses are delayed like 2-3 business days

[charonte-simi]

First day of work is next Wednesday!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

I did it! I'm here for good now holy fuck

#I feel like I always have a very delayed emotional response to good news lol #I can't feel it till it's translated into something more tangible #cause it still feels very sureal #once ive actually physically reported to work and come to terms with the fact that I'll be doing that every week for the foreseeable future #then i think itll finally hit me #that im 100% here for good #simi speaks

[yuukimiyas]

I just saw that we r mutuals?? Idk how I didn't realize sooner T - T sry, anyway, Hiiii Chloe <33 I hope you're doing well 🩷 it's so nice to have another reo simp as a mutual :D

As a sign of appreciation I drew u something :)) that hairtie has been through hell with him ;(

hello marie!!! i’m so sorry for the late reply!! (˚ ˃̣̣̥ω˂̣̣̥ ) but eeep!! im sobbing look at him!! (੭ु ›ω‹ )੭ु⁾⁾♡ i’m so so so excited to have you as a new moot!! i love love love your blog so much!! i hope you enjoy my lil city & i can’t wait to see you & isagi around town!! ଘ(੭ˊ꒳​ˋ)੭✧ i hope you have an amazing day, love!!

#LIL REO LOOK AT HOW CUTE & SMALL HE IS!!! IM SQUEEZING & SQUISHING HIM!! (੭ु ›ω‹ )੭ु⁾⁾♡ #its me!! im the emotional support hairtie!! ꉂ(˃̤▿˂̤*ૢ) #im so so sorry for the delayed response :(( i haven’t had a minute to check my phone but i’m SO HAPPY to see you in my mailbox!! <33 #*ੈ✩‧₊˚marycorn #( ˘ ³˘)♡moots! #⋆°˖➴ p.o. box!

[vampirebutterflies]

listen ‘ere boy there is a voice in ur head telling u ur fine and you don’t need to go to therapy tomorrow and that voice is a f u c k i n g liar don’t listen to it boy don’t fuckin’ listen to that rat ass bastard it does NOT have ur best interests at heart

#vent in tags etc etc #aim losing my mind over here #it’s fine #see the thing is I’m so deeply lacking in like. the emotions edition of object permanence. I can have a massively heartbreaking reaction to #smth and then once I’m out of that moment and even slightly distracted it’s like nothing ever happened ?? #so like yk I was nearly [radio static noises] over talking to my therapist abt the young csa thing and I’m meant to be starting emdr tomorr #tomorrow* except like for the past two weeks I’ve overall been fine regarding that?? instead it’s the ed and other traumas flaring up so ?? #idk how Specific emdr is I honestly don’t know much about it yet but like yk now I’m wondering if I should delay starting that in favour of #talking about the other badtimes tm rearing their heads atm. todays in particular was unexpected it happened this morning and it’s only just #like. hit me and started biting and it’s ?? also dumb cuz like on one hand I’m pretty okay but on the other hand the other half of my brain #is spiralling hysterically to the point where I’m very glad I’m already in bed and like I know [redacted] won’t help but it’s like my brain #is just so lost about how to hold these things and what to do at all so it’s just pulling out the bad coping mechanism and insistently #thrusting it in my lap and waving its arms like it wasn’t even That Bad tm of a situation today but it Was some very specific factors which #are holding hands with Other specific factors and then The Location Of The Events is just #yea okay maybe I will talk to her abt this / these things instead if I can #ah the joys of heavy personal responsibility at a very young age and the severe guilt that gets bred from that and the fantastic experience #of things being so far out of your control and almost destined to fail and the absolute wonder of The Actual Person(s) To Blame Having No #Consequences For Their Actions and ending up feeling like you failed and you’re a complete fraud cuz no good you do will make up for that #one situation and yeah okay I’m gonna go sleep #ugh

[vitruvianmanbara]

i’m never getting out of hell (350 reblogs of fanart I have stashed in my drafts)

#every time I go in there to clean it out a bit I add like 10 more things. help me #experiencing delayed emotional response to finishing sbr so I hope you guys like cowboys

[kittimau]

head empty only kenobi

#emotional breakdown initiated #i actually think i'm having a delayed response because i'm so tired lmao its 4am #gonna need a whole month to process what just happened #anyway i worship at the altar of deborah chow #kenobi spoilers #kenobi series #kenobi finale #obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #darth vader

[bootlickerhawks]

not me having a meltdown over a conversation I had over a month ago :/

#i hate having delayed emotional response #coming to terms with the fact that my best friend means more to me than i mean to her #hell i dont think she considers me her best friend anymore #i cant blame her she moved away over 5 years ago and we both suck at long distance friendship #she changed my life #if you wrote a wikipedia article abt me there would be sections abt before and after i met her #i cant say that i had the same impact #this wouldn't sting so much if i had other close friends but i just... dont #im friendly with people but i never get close to them #(thanks middle school trauma) #and every time i try to open up to people i feel guilty cuz my mom made me believe that my existence is a burden #vent #cami.txt #delete later

[ixioideae-letters]

My dad is over at my place because we have a medical appointment today. Three more hours until it's due and he keeps on turning in my bed.

The sight of once a jovial man brought to a shadow is hunting me. More so cause this is my father. Today will be a long day of enduring.

Maybe that's what it is the worst. Enduring. We don't fight, we are in a dark room waiting. Enduring. Hope is not something I necessarily have.

It hasn't dawned on me yet, I think. My emotions have never really been in sync with anything, probably I'll get hit by it tonight as I'll remain alone once again. Right now it's just an empty hallway, with a ghost standing right there. I can't seem to scream yet.

#I'm also at work for 2 more hours #I can't concentrate on anything #My mom and aunt are in the kitchen but I can't go there with them cause work :/ #Seeing him so... Powerless and in pain #I will need time to regulate and feel this emotion actually #Delayed emotional response my enemy

[ed-journals]

Yey for WFH cause I wouldn't have otherwise be able to cry my eyes out while working

#We love working in a corporation imagine if I had to GO to a pharmacy and like not cry my eyes out #Gonna be alone the whole weekend and in a way I'm happy with that cause I can cry my eyes out but #At the same time this might have not been a very good time to be alone #But at the same time I can't go home i can't see my dad face to face I just can't #I can't stand my extended family at this time they have NO IDEA how to console or talk or just approach this situation especially with me #My aunt kept saying that she knows me she knows I'm strong yeah because 1. I'm neurodivergent #I have delayed emotional response and when it hits me i don't want anyone around #And 2 #I do not show anything to anyone #'i saw you being so brave when you had your cancer misdiagnosis' #Women I self isolated and planned my suicide sure I was so brave #tw: death #Tw: suicide mention

[sickgraymeat]

Just found out (should have known) that if I needed to go on disability (short term or otherwise) now or after my job ends I would not qualify bc I’m being paid under the table. Knew this abt unemployment but 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲 everyone please advocate for yourselves and inform yourselves in the workplace and don’t accept illegal pay if you can help it. Not having to file taxes is not a benefit. You’re being screwed over.

#big ol car accident yesterday #I don’t have a concussion but I think I may have had some kind of minor brain injury #or maybe it’s just the trauma sneaking in since I like had no emotional reaction to the event #my brain is too good at delaying emotional responses I swear #but now I feel like doom doom doom doom doom dread dread dread dread dread dread etc #why does so much shit have to happen at once and RIGHT when I am like feeling a little more optimistic #and like have good things in my personal life #it’s so fucking ???? like of course #of course I’m not allowed to have this without that too #the world gives me [the power of being so fond of someone] and then it hits me with a truck #ok universe jesus I get it #lmao #I’m afraid to post vents here now that I’m ??? famous????? whehhdbsbe #f&c has been great for my notes here & on ao3 #I hope I don’t disappoint y’all #feeling pretty weird (bad) abt Simon rn I’m just. I’m just putting off thinking abt that lmao #ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhgggh #anyway I’m afraid but I’m still impulsive so y’know what can ya do #might delete later who knows I am impulsive #vent ish #personal ish #I do believe the family I work for probably doenst realize how shitty this is for me but #I genuinely didn’t even realize until this year bc the year before I’d started too recently to have made enough to need to pay taxes #(if that makes sense) #so i didn’t realize they didn’t claim me and then thought I was an independent contractor maybe but then found out I’m a household employee #which is obvious now but I didn’t know shit #idk I don’t think they knew but I also don’t think they care that much either :/ #*knew the extent of how shitty this is for me

[theambitiouswoman]

Learn the skill of delaying your response when faced with someone who is intentionally trying to provoke you. Refuse to let others dictate your mood. Take charge of your emotions. You decide when, how, and whether you want to to react. You control yourself, no one else does.

[gommyworm]

:^)

#being silly out here !! #feeling sentimental !!! #lots of regrets !!!! #casually making myself cry at work !!! #heartbreak actually really sucks i think #slightly embarassing to be experiencing it for the first time in my early-mid 20s + for it to last like 3 years lol #also embarassing to have a full on nose dripping cry in the first aid station in the lobby of my building #some sort of delayed emotional response or something ? idk #as the first aid attendant lmao #i didnt go to the first aid station to cry i work here lol #i thot i cried about this enough but i guess not !!!!!!!! #started trying to type out specific feelings but started crying more n tbh i just want to stop crying so im gonna try and edit #rip my nose rn i hate crying bc my nose gets so extremely drippy #gommywords

[marmorenshud]

I lied, I am a ctually really fucking sad about having to leave Sweden

#caw #the classic post erasmus depression that they warned me about i guess #ah classsic delayed emotional response. im fine no actually i lied abt my own feelings bc i wasnt able to feel them