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purplesurveys · 4 years

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1010

survey from diggitydoo

Have you ever felt a baby kick? Yes, when my mom was pregnant with my brother. What color pants/shorts are you wearing? I’m only wearing a duster gown; no shorts underneath. I just got it last night, actually - my mom wanted to donate clothes to victims of a recent fire incident in Manila and so she asked my sister and I to sort through our closets for clothes we were willing to give away. My sister ended up giving away a comfy-looking duster gown that she never even wore and even smelled brand new to boot. It ended up in my hands, ha. But apart from that we gave away a lot of stuff that aren’t old uniforms or costumes (which is what most people tend to ‘donate’, ugh), so we just hope they end up with people who really need them. When is the last time you did something truly fun, and what was it? Last night I went on our org’s Discord server and we played Jackbox games for around an hour or so. It was my first time to socialize again after around two months and I really, really needed that moment. I even met the org’s newest roster of applicants for this semester, which was neat. :) What was the scariest moment of your life? Men terrorizing me or near-car crashes I’ve had.

Have you ever heard of Leonard Cohen? The name is familiar, but that’s the most I know.

Pancakes or flapjacks? I guess pancakes, since I don’t even know what flapjacks are. What kind of computer are you on? It’s a laptop. Do you eat Chinese food? If so, what's your favorite dish? For sure. Pork buns or minced pork with eggplant. With century egg on the side, yum. What are you usually doing at midnight? Either passed out or desperately trying to sleep because I don’t want to lose any more hours of sleep and risk being cranky for the whole of the next day. Have you ever developed feelings for a friend, but you were already with someone? No. The worst thing that’s happened was being someone’s ball date (and unbeknownst to me, they apparently had feelings for me at the time) while I was already with someone. If so, how did it turn out? He figured it out by himself, which I still feel bad about. But the timing was super off and I just couldn’t find a moment to sit him down and set the record straight...ah well. It was just super complicated at the time. Give me your brief definition of love. My favorite love-related quote is “Love never says ‘I have done enough’” and for the longest time, that has been my guiding principle when it comes to it. Definitely a tad bit cheesy, but telling myself that over and over makes it easier to continue loving the people I care for and be patient with them when they’re being asses. Gab included, then and now. What is the most beautiful part of the human body, male or female? It differs for everyone but I’m a thigh girl through and through. What kind of shoes do you wear? Uh...various ones? I have sneakers, flats, heels, flip-flops, probably a couple more kinds that I can’t place at the moment. What is the worst thing you've ever done when you were really angry? Resorting to physical violence. I was a kid constantly exposed to violence in my old home, and at the time I genuinely thought that’s how most things were settled or pacified. I still feel like shit about it to this day, and my backstory isn’t an excuse at all; but the past is the past and I’ve been trying to make up for it by being a much more gentle angry person in the last few years. Are there any pills you take on a daily basis? If so, what? Nope. Do you like the smell of coconuts? For some reason I can’t stand anything coconut (which is a damn shame considering I’m Filipino) but I love dishes with heaps of coconut milk in them, like curry. That’s the one coconut-related thing I enjoy, but otherwise I’ve never learned to appreciate the taste and smell of buko juice, coconut shavings, coconut pies, and everything else coconut. What is the heaviest you think you can lift? From what my old PE class showed me, around 70 to 80 lbs. Do you take Tums? Idk what that is so I guess I don’t. Have you ever walked on a pier at the beach? I’m not sure if I’ve been to a pier before. I bet it feels wonderful and freeing and I’d love to visit one; but I also can’t keep myself from associating piers with the recurring image of Jennifer Connelly’s character standing on one from Requiem for a Dream. How about under one? No. At what age do you first remember feeling butterflies in your stomach around someone? Not sure if it was 11 or 12, but it was definitely one of those years. Do you feel that way around anyone now? Yeah, if they allowed me to see them. But I’m shut out now so I haven’t had that sensation in a while.

Do you ever talk to yourself or think deep thoughts while on the toilet? No. Do you ever sing to yourself? Sure. I’m sure most people do every once in a while. What is a sound that relaxes you? Ocean waves have never failed. How hard has it been to reach your main goal in life? ‘Main goal’ sounds so overwhelming; I make it a point to avoid one overarching goal and instead make little goals and plans here and there depending on where I am in life. Do you remember the song about hoes in different area codes? Never heard of it. What is your main heritage? Filipino. What kind of pickles do you prefer, if you like pickles? I hate pickles. What kind of cheese do you prefer, if you like cheese? Mozzarella and feta are my faves, but I love cheese and am willing to be adventurous when it comes to it. If you could have a sea creature as a pet, what would you want? Eh, they can stay in the sea where they can actually survive. I don’t exactly have the best track record when it comes to keeping fish as pets. How about a farm animal? Probably pig. So, do you have hoes in different area codes? No, and ew. What is the most annoying song you can think of that came out recently? Haven’t been exposed to a lot of new music lately and the songs I do get to hear on the radio whenever I drive are actually pretty good. This totally doesn’t answer your question but my favorites so far have been Birthday by Disclosure, Kehlani, and Syd; and Plain by Benee, Lily Allen, and Flo Milli. What is a song that you hate to admit you like? Any Kanye song I like. What inspires you to get off your bum and do something productive? Not wanting to go into another downward spiral. Do you ever use Urban Dictionary? Extremely rarely. I only do when there’s a new slang I’m completely unfamiliar with. Do you find the definitions on there to be generally funny or stupid? Stupid for the most part. I find them too immature or vulgar, but that’s one of the points of the website so I guess I’m just not in their target audience lol. What comes to your mind when you hear the word 'transformation'? Uh, the Transformer robots.

What was something you regularly played with as a child? My cousins’ toy soldiers.

Have you ever given in to peer pressure? Eh, a few times. If so, what did you do? I’ve been pulled to drinking sessions here and there when I really shouldn’t be drinking because I had an important test tomorrow or something else was happening the next day that was just as significant. What part of your body have you had the most problems with in your life? Teeth, I’m pretty sure. I’ve had braces, needed a tooth extracted, gotten a cavity, and gone through a severe toothache.

Do a lot of people check you out when you're in public? Idk I never look around because being aware of it would just freak me out and make me feel like I’m naked. What is a good name for a turtle? Would depend on their personality. And this applies to all kinds of pets, at least for me. I don’t decide on their names until I have a good grasp of their attitude. Can you imitate any accents well? If so, which one(s)? Stereotypical Filipino mom and valley girl. Do you like having your ear nibbled on? Sure. What makes a good kisser a good kisser? I’ve only kissed one person so I’m not the best judge for this; but I always like it when my lower lip is tugged or grazed on. How many times a year do you have a family thing? This is a little vague for me. Do you mean get-togethers? Giant-ass reunions? Movie nights? Game nights? What are the best things to put in a smoothie? I only like one kind of smoothie and it’s sold by a local joint – and I think I’ve already shared this before but that smoothie of theirs that I like has “apple, banana, cinnamon, oats, coco sugar, chia seeds, greens, and soy milk,” according to their menu. So I guess those are the best ingredients for me, ha. Do you ever eat with your eyes closed and just focus on the taste? When I find something extremely delicious, yeah. What do you dislike most about where you live right now? For the most part I can’t wait to get out of suburban residential villages. I’d love to finally experience living in a condo in a super busy and active city. Has anyone ever given you a rose/roses? Yes.

Are you watching your weight? Not really. I’m trying to gain pounds though, if anything. I haven’t eaten much in the last two months. Have you ever become really good friends with someone you found online? I trust y’all with my life, so that’s one. Apart from Tumblr, the best friends I made were probably the people in the AJ/Punk fandom, back when I had a stan account on Twitter. I don’t remember most of their names now and we fizzled out pretty quickly when both parts of the ship left WWE, but I look back on that period with fondness. Those people made high school a lot easier for me. What makes your best friend your best friend? She doesn’t care whether I’m on top of the world with happiness or completely self-destructive and crying my eyes out; she has always been present. Do you have a drunk uncle? *rolls eyes* We don’t wanna open up that can of worms... Do you hear weird noises in your house at night? Nope. What is something you do that is generally more like something the opposite sex does? Based on personal experience and not to come off as sexist, but it’s liking wrestling. I have never met a girl in real life who has even the most remote interest in pro wrestling or can tell me who Hulk Hogan is. And the ones I’ve had discussions with - from shallow/casual to in-depth - have all been guys. Seeing girls who are into wrestling is like finding a rare Pokemon, at least in real life. What is the girliest thing you do, if you're a girl? Idk. What is the coolest tattoo you've ever seen? Probably the spork tattoo of Josh, a crew member from Good Mythical Morning. It’s just a line tattoo. Of a spork. On his arm. But he managed to make it so goddamn fascinating lmao; and apparently, as I learned just now, it has a pretty touching backstory to it too, which makes it a million times cooler. Have you ever created anything artistic that you're proud of? If so, what? I’ve never finished any of the crafts I bought. Never finished a coloring book page much less an entire coloring book, a painting, a gem painting...it’s something I’ll have to bring my butt to do one of these days. I can’t imagine how fulfilling it would feel. Do you only eat the middle of the oreo, if you eat oreos? I eat the whole thing but I honestly find Oreos too sweet and I’ve always much rather preferred Oreo-flavored stuff instead of the actual cookies.

Do you know anyone with a huge ego? My mom. If so, is there anything else about them you actually like? She’s fed me for 22 years and gave me an education, I guess. Though it’s something I appreciate more so than like. Have you ever used a racial slur, even jokingly? Probably as a dumb kid, when historical context wasn’t a thing to me yet. I still wince thinking about it, but I suppose what matters is being better and more responsible moving forward. Do you have any friends who are more like siblings to you? Angela and to some extent Andi.

If so, what about them do you like most? They are both understanding when it comes to me - almost to a fault. What do you like on your hotdogs, if you eat hotdogs? When you say ‘hotdogs’ here, it refers to the sausages itself. The sandwich kind of hotdog isn’t super popular here. What is everyone else in your house doing right now? My siblings are still resting in their rooms; my dad is preparing for work, I think. What is the most money you've ever had at one time? Something like P10,000 or P15,000 when my mom needed me to pay for something in cash. How long do you think it would take you to run a mile? Idk, maybe 10 minutes. I won’t be fast, that’s for sure. Look down. What do you see? My legs and the pillow I’m sitting on. What is a subject that makes you uncomfortable? Right now, probably my failed relationship. I haven’t gotten to the sharing stage yet and remotely thinking about it gets my voice all shaky. What is a subject you can talk on and on about and not get sick of it? Paramore. What kind of mood were you in most of today? It’s only 7:52 AM. My only mood so far is just woke up. Has anyone ever walked in on you naked? Yeah. Because people in this damn house never knock. Tell me an inside joke you have with someone. The word ‘ariba.’ What is the worst thing someone could do to you emotionally? Break my trust. So simple but it packs a punch. What is the worst thing you've ever done to someone emotionally? Idk if I’ve ever been that aggressive. When I want to do something destructive towards someone I always end up asking what it would feel like if the action was done to me, and it’s always been enough to sway me away from doing the thing. How do you feel now about the first person you ever dated? Sad. How about the last person (your last ex)? Same person. What is the best invention ever invented? Air conditioners.

What is something that needs to be invented? Portable air conditioners. What always makes you burp? My burps come randomly. What are you doing tomorrow? It’s my last weekend before my new job, soooooooo...I’ll be bumming around for my last two days of freedom.

#survey #surveys

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ask-edd · 4 years

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do you have a favorite song?

((You’ve activated my special interest, I shall now talk about music for way too fucking long

Under the cut cause it’s gonna be long))

So I mentioned here some favorite songs, but since it’s just about 4am and I have nothing better to do, I’ll expand on that list

In no particular order from my fav bands

Fav Sonata Arctica songs

- Shy - San Sebastian - Wolf & Raven - Kingdom for a Heart - FullMoon - Replica

Fav Autoheart songs (I love literally all of them but I”m not gonna put their entire discography here so here’s some recommendations for if you wanna get into the band yourself)

- Lent - Stalker’s Tango - My Hallelujah - Control - The Sailor Song - Robbing Banks - Anniversary - Agoraphobia - Heartbreaker - Moscow - Foolishly Wrong - Murky Waters

Fav Ghost songs

- I’m a Marionette - Witch Image - Mary on a Cross - Dance Macabre - Kiss the Go-Goat - Rats - Year Zero - Monstrance Clock - Cirice - Square Hammer - He Is

Fav Streetlight Manifesto songs

- Keasbey Nights - One Foot on the Gas, One Foot in the Grave - A Better Place, a Better Time - Everything Went Numb - Point/Counterpoint - We Will Fall Together - Would You Be Impressed?

Fav Red Vox songs

- From the Stars - In the Garden - Job in the City - Back to School - We Had a Little Talk - There She Goes - Atom Bomb

Fav TWRP songs

- The No Pants Dance - Phantom Racer - Life Party - Starlight Brigade - Tactile Sensation - Rock n Roll Best Friends - Body Image - Atomic Karate - The Hit

Fav NSP songs (and covers)

- I Don’t Know What We’re Talking About - Nights on Broadway - Glory of Love - Heart Boner - Orgy for One - First Date - Cool Patrol - Danny Don’t You Know - Three Minutes of Ecstasy - Pour Some Sugar on Me - In Your Eyes - Don’t Lose My Number - The Decision - Everybody Shut Up (I Have an Erection) - Peppermint Creams - Subdivisions - Rock With You - Road Trip

Fav Richie Branson songs (for those who watch Camp Camp, this is the guy who does all the outro songs from season 2 onwards)

- Not Myself - I, for one, Welcome Our Robot Overlords - Bon Bon Voyage - Underpaid and Overqualified - Outro Outro - Keeper of the Flame - Cult of Personality

Fav Jeff Williams (RWBY) songs

- All that Matters - Lionize - Forever Fall - Bad Luck Charm - All Our Days - Let’s Just Live - Home - Cold - This LIfe is Mine - Like Morning Follows Night - RWBY vs FNKI - Not Fall in Love with You - Red Like Roses Part 1 and 2 - Boop - Shine - This Will Be the Day

Fav Reel Big Fish songs

- Beer - Sell Out - Nothing But a Good Time - Brown Eyed Girl - Everyone Else is an Asshole - Take On Me - Life Sucks... Let’s Dance! - Another FU Song

Fav Living Tombstone songs/remixes

- Drunk - My Ordinary Life - Don’t Tattle on Me - No Mercy - Epoch - It’s Raining Men - Squid Melody Blue - Dog of Wisdom Remix Blue - Die in a Fire - It’s Been So Long - Five Nights at Freddy’s 1 Song - The Road to El Dorado Remix - Fun Dead Theme - Collecting Cookies - Hampire - Pinkie’s Brew - Good Girl - Mine Turtle - Tom’s Dog - Smile Song - Discord - September

Fav ABBA songs

- Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (A Man After Midnight) - Voulez-Vous - SOS - Money Money - Super Trouper - Mamma Mia - Take a Chance on Me - Dancing Queen - Knowing Me, Knowing You

Fav Mystery Skulls songs

- Heaven - When I’m With You - The Future - Every Note - Soul on Fire - Freaking Out - Money - Paralyzed - Hellbent - Forever - Magic - Ghost - Losing My Mind

Fav Glass Animals songs

- Toes - Black Mambo - Season 2 Episode 3 - Youth - Gooey - The Other Side of Paradise - Pork Soda - Your Love (Deja Vu)

Fav Saint Motel Songs

- You Can Be You - Move - Van Horn - My Type - Sweet Talk

Fav The Hoosiers songs

- Killer - Goodbye Mr A - Up to No Good - Worried About Ray - A Sadness Runs Through Him

Weird meme-y mashups and bits from Youtube

- Text to Speech by Louie Zong - Korn - Coming Undone But It’s Pony By Ginuwine by William Maranci - U Got That | JJBA Requiem Version (Giorno’s Theme Remix) by Reii-kun - Plastic JoJo - Sono Chi No Future Funk (plastic love+JJBA) by Seventh Sage - Aaron Grooves - Jazzy Note Blocks (Animation vs. Minecraft) by GuckTube YT - Kanye West but make it Disney by John Fassold - Sober Black Horse - KT Tunstall vs Evanescence (Mashup) by oneboredjeu Mashup - Scanty & Kneesocks’ Absolute Territory, This WIll Be the Fighting Gold, Lone Friends on the Wild Side, and CARAMELLGASSIN’ by Triple-Q

rq special mention to a few AMVs everyone should see - Anime’s Got Talent - Edited with JazzsVids & ReplayStudios by AmvLuna - Speedwagon Slamjam (AWA Pro 2015 Best Action) - JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure AMV by irriadin - Hero AMV (Ultimate Cartoon Tribute) by Writermist - Spirit Never Dies Anime AMV by Rajiv Andrade

And then some random favs

- 12 Feet Deep by The Front Bottoms - Set On You (Life in Toronto) by Billy’s Bones) - Naked and Love the Way You Move by Slightly Left of Centre - She’s So High by Tal Bachman - Dangerous by LEFT BOY - I Don’t Wanna Be in Love by Good Charlotte - Wild Side by ALI - In the End, Crawling, Papercut, Numb, Breaking the Habit, New Divide, and What I’ve Done by Linkin Park - Picture Frames and Everything Falls Apart by rei brown - Romeo and Juliet, Sex in the City, Peach Scone, and Creve Coeur 1 by Hobo Johnson - Kangaroo Court by Capital Cities - Campfire Light by Tequila & The Sunrise Gang - Cola Song by INNA - Here Comes the Hotstepper (Remix) by Baby & Me - Bruises by Fox Stevenson - Shut up and Dance by WALK THE MOON - Applejack, Feed Me with Your Heart, Lullaby for a Princess, and The Moon Rises by Ponyphonic - Kiss Me by Sixpence None the Richer - So Good by Bratz - Dark Paradise by Lana Del Rey - Amhran Na Farraige by Lisa Hannigan - A Moment of Silence by Dan P - Rockefeller Street (New Nightcore) by Getter Jaani - Broken Record, 15 Reading Homestuck on the Internet, and Chamomile by atlas - Thumbnail by Louie Zong - Baby Hotline by Jack Stauber - Hey Jealousy by Gin Blossoms (and the cover by Hit the Lights) - Spirit Never Die by Masterplan - Magnum Bullets by Night Runner - Tonight by Vague003 (and the original Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler) - Hoodie by Hey Violet - Worst in Me by Unlike Pluto - A Night to Forget and Too Tired to Run by Cain’s Offering - Private Eye by Alkaline Trio - Karma and I’m Ready by AJR - Sorry Haha I Fell Asleep, Passing Papers, and Putting a Spin on Never Ever Getting Rid of Me by Egg - Cannibal by Tally Hall - interlude IV (Showtime) by Zach Callison - Scarborough Fair by Super Guitar Bros - Misery Business by Skatune Network - The Less I Know the Better by Tame Impala - Relatively by Faded Paper Figures - Schizophrenia, Under My Skin, and Victoria by Jukebox the Ghost

#mun #this was unnecessarily long but it be like that when you have ADHD and someone asks abt your special interest #Anonymous

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sigritandtheelves · 6 years

Text

Six Octobers

Rating: Explicit

Tags: MSR, canon divergence (somewhere around “Requiem”), love and smut and fluff

Words: 4.2k

Summary: One decade, six small windows into a shared life.

A/N: This may be my only fictober entry this year, so I tried to make it as Octobery as I could. This took me… so freaking long to write. Like way longer than it should have. It’s kind of achingly sweet, but I hope some people like it anyway.

🎃

_+_

October, 1996

Two things happen that alter his life and the path he envisions for it. The first is that they are both somehow, with the same case, made aware of a possible future in which there are things like neighborhood baseball games, homes away from the city, quiet places with tall grass, children. Her children maybe. His children.

(“What about your family, Mulder?”)

He feels strange. He touches her back. He calls her mom. He doesn’t know why he does these things when there are monsters under their noses and in his real life he can barely keep his fish alive. But he sees her with him for the first time in those hushed daydreams of another kind of life in some distant universe. He wonders how she might fit, and if she might like it. A quick, guilty image pulses behind his eyes: he imagines holding an infant—a thing he has never done—on the porch of some little house. The child feels heavy in his arms, like the full weight of this impossible future, smells of powder and milk. In thinking this, something hot ignites inside him. Hot like guilt, because this is not his life, nor can it be; the inverted structure of this way of being disorients him. And yet. He dreams Scully beside him on the porch, wearing blue jeans, reading. Her fingers press between the pages of a book to hold her place, and she looks up. Her smile undoes him. She is still rounded from having carried the child: her edges softened, long hair swept up off her shoulders. What mad vision is this?

Then the thought is gone, swallowed in the gore and loss of this terrible case, as he should have expected. There is no space untouched by blood and sorrow that he has ever known. Andy Taylor is a myth and figment, an impossibility, another good and pure thing destroyed. Within hours, the reckless deputy follows into darkness. The threat here is not new violence encroaching, but old brutality irrupting from below: it has always been. It is the furious revolt against a way-of-life challenged.

Mulder and Scully shake their heads at the cruelty of it, then drive back through Pennsylvania’s falling leaves. But the beautiful vision, like a seed, has been planted down in the soil of his deepest, most hidden wanting. It germinates.

The second thing that happens, too soon after, is that he almost loses her. He imagines her a vacant zombie after Schnauz would have stabbed her brain with an awl. He imagines her dead, maybe, from a bad procedure done wrong. The two images war: soft Dana on the porch (the infant cries and he kisses its belly, tickles its feet) and her body among the brown leaves of the forest floor. Their lives veer always, ever closer, toward the second. He knows this and he hates it.

In their hotel, when she has scrubbed the duct-tape glue from her cheeks and chin, when she has showered and changed into pajamas, and sits on the end of her bed, she asks him to sit with her. She does not cry. She slumps against him, and he wraps his arms around her.

She tells him, “Thank you.”

He says, “I’m sorry.”

And then he stays with her until she falls asleep. He lays his hand on her back as she tucks beneath the blankets. He listens to her breathe and lets himself think about that other life. It is the two things together that make him realize what she could be to him, were he not so incapable of love. The two things make him want something else, something dangerous, for the very first time.

October, 1997

When she begins to look herself again—no more dark circles under her eyes, bones not so visible—he takes her out of her apartment: “To breathe again,” he says. On the first chilly Saturday, he calls her around nine in the morning, asking if she has hiking boots. He brings her coffee and, shy, kisses her on the cheek in the doorway. She blushes hard, so unsure of what this means now.

“You look so good,” he says, and again she doesn’t know what to think. She looks good because she doesn’t look dying? Or she looks good because she looks good.

“Where are we going?” She asks.

He waggles his eyebrows at her. “You’ll see.”

They drive for about an hour, headed north and west into Maryland. He is quiet for the ride, and she tries to read his expression but he gives nothing away. She feels full with life, with the promise of their adventure together, here with him in the car, driving into a mystery. She can’t help but smile.

He takes them to Patapsco Valley State Park, where he pulls in to a wooded area with trails heading in several directions. The air stings her nose and makes her zip her jacket fully. She still has trouble getting warm some days.

“This is the one,” he says, nodding at a trail head, touching her shoulder to lead the way.

“Mulder,” she says. “What are we doing?”

“We’re hiking,” he says. “Not a tough hike, less than a mile. I want to show you something.”

She follows him. Because she always follows him. Because for a while she couldn’t, and feared she never would again, but now she can and she will. Because she loves him. This is what she’s come to know fully as she stared down her own death and readied herself to leave him. What she’d thought was, When I die, it will be without getting to show him how much I could have loved him. She’d tried, though—she’d offered him the very last thing she had to save him, which was her death. She would have taken every bad thing from him if she could, every hurt and regret and guilt and accusation and anguish, taken them with her when she went, knowing she was leaving him with something worse in her absence. But he had refused to lay the weight of his pain on her. And in the end, instead, he’d saved her.

The trail is relatively flat. Still, she notices that he watches her steps: careful, just a tad too protective, his hand hovering whenever there is a rock or root. “I’m fine, Mulder,” she assures him. “I’m really really fine.”

He nods, his smile apologetic. “I know, it’s just…”

She smiles too, a little sad. “Yeah.”

They come to a fork and he leads her to the right, toward the sound of something she can’t quite identify. The smell is different too. Mustier. Wet. Then, a clearing in the trees, and there it is: the river, the changing leaves, a waterfall.

“Oh my God,” she says. It’s like a painting, the sun on the river and the reflection of gold and yellow and red. She turns and sees that he’s smiling, but he’s not looking at the water. He’s looking at her. “It’s beautiful,” she tells him.

“Do you like it?” He asks. “I found this spot one day, a few years ago in the fall. I thought of you when I saw it.” He looks away, sheepish. “We’ve been busy in the fall since then.”

She thinks back—a few years ago in the fall. October three years ago, she was missing and he was… lost. This is what her mother has told her, from what she saw of him. He came here when she was gone, and he was thinking of her in all this color, and now he’s almost lost her again. But she will live this time, too, and he wants her to see it.

She reaches out her hand. He takes it quickly. “I love it,” she says. “Thank you.”

He squeezes her fingers, then tugs her toward him, pulls her into a long, slow hug. His heartbeat thrums through the fabric of his sweatshirt against her cheek, and he is solid and real and good in her arms. He smells of himself and she wants to keep this small thing forever, this moment of his utmost caring. “I would have died too, I think,” he whispers into her hair. She squeezes tight his waist, shakes her head no against his sternum.

“Oh, Mulder.” It is all she can say, because she knows it is probably true. He palms the back of her hair while his other hand grips her waist. His lips linger there, on her head.

After long minutes, they turn to watch the leaves and the water and the bluest sky.

October, 1999

They are new at this, treading a slow march forward into some unknown terrain. Their devotion has always been fierce, but unspoken. It feels strange to him now, bringing it out into the open, learning to touch her with something more than just respect and care.

“You don’t have to,” she assures him. “It’s not a big deal.” But by the way she says this, he knows it is a big deal, having dinner with her mother.

“I want to, Scully. It was good of her to ask.”

She searches his face for a moment. “She just wants to see that you’re okay. She was worried. When I told her.”

Scully is sitting on his coffee table, facing him on the couch, changing his bandages one last time. Gentle, she checks the pink scars at his temples with her fingertips. “Okay?” She asks.

“Yeah,” he says, voice suddenly tight. Her proximity is raising his blood pressure, the smell of her musky shampoo and body lotion. She runs her fingers through his hair in a way that doesn’t feel doctorly, but her face is pure concentration.

“You may not need the bandage, actually. It’s healing well.”

He smiles at her. “Freedom from the gauze headband? But I was going to go as a mummy for Halloween.”

She smirks. “Just be careful with it.”

She’s about to get up and throw away the cottony strips she’s just removed, but he stops her with a hand on her arm. “Hey,” he says, and she looks at him. He touches her face with his hand, watches it grow pink, can practically hear her heartbeat. He leans forward and places a kiss on her mouth. Just a peck, really, a little press of skin to skin. He pulls back and says, “Thank you.”

“For what?” She asks, and now it’s her voice that is strained.

He shrugs. “For fixing me.”

He watches the hesitation on her face—just a bare moment of it—and then she moves in to kiss him again, fuller this time, her fingers coming up to rest on his shoulders. And Jesus help him, this time with tongue. His hands go to her waist, under her suit jacket but over her top. It is not their first kiss, but their movement toward each other has been slow so far, especially after his injury. He senses in her now, though, the full breadth of her desire, and it knocks his sense clear out the window. Head injury or no head injury, he will lay this woman down and make love to her the moment she says the word.

But she presses her hand against his chest and pulls back, then covers her mouth, looking embarrassed. “I’m sorry,” she says.

He can’t help but laugh, squeeze her hip, shake his head. “Sorry?”

Her face is red. “I said to be careful. You—you need to be careful.”

“How careful?” He knows what he must look like, the depth of lust she must see in his face, because she reddens further.

“I—“ she licks her lips, and he almost groans. “No, um...” If it’s possible, she blushes even more. “No vigorous exercise or… activities that increase your heart-rate. For another week or so.”

He looks at his watch, to the day marked where the 3 would be. “It’s Tuesday,” he says. “I’m going to hold you to that.”

Her eyes go wide. She swallows hard and nods.

On Friday they visit Maggie, who feeds them and fusses over the tiny scars on his head. “Oh, Fox, I’m so glad you’re okay,” she says. She’s even made him his favorite food: rosemary chicken and mashed potatoes.

“How did you know?” He asks, and Scully blushes.

After dinner, he emerges from the bathroom and hears the two women talking. When he realizes it’s about him, he pauses at the door to the kitchen. He knows he should feel guilty, but their words make his heart pound, make him smile despite himself.

“It’s just that he’s so clearly in love with you, Dana. I mean, I knew that years ago, but it’s so obvious now.”

“Mom, please! We’re not… We’re just… I don’t know what we are. Just please don’t pry.”

Later, when they’re slipping on their jackets and getting ready to go, he sweeps her into a kiss that he feels with his whole body. Though startled at first, she relaxes against him, touches his face, arches her back so their bodies are flush. When he moves back, she is panting and glassy-eyed. “He is in love with you, Dana,” he says, and her mouth drops open. He nuzzles her nose with his and whispers into her lips, “Four days.”

When Maggie says goodnight, she has half a smirk and a knowing look in her eyes. He winks at her on his way out the door.

October, 2000

In a pumpkin patch in northern Virginia, Mulder holds up a monstrosity for her inspection, boots already muddy from his trek to find the very best one.

She frowns. “Where will we put it?” She carries two smaller gourds already, one in each hand, for the dining-room table.

“On the porch,” he says.

“Mulder, we don’t have a porch.”

“Ah, not yet.” He walks over to her awkwardly, balancing the weight of the pumpkin in his arms, and bends to kiss her forehead. “But I have a good feeling about this next house.”

“It seems too far,” she says.

He shrugs. “We could make it work.”

They’ve been looking tentatively for a house together, somewhere outside the city and the worst of the suburbs. If he had his way, he’d take them all the way out to the boonies, but the thought makes her a little anxious. “What about work?” She keeps saying. “There are more important things,” he always replies.

Now, as they head back to the tractor-pulled wagon that will take them from the field to the farm’s store and restaurant, he tucks his black sweater over the pumpkin that’s pressed to his abdomen. “Hey look. Guess who I am?” He arches an eyebrow dramatically and says in a mocking voice, “Mul-der, that sofa doesn’t go with the loveseat. Mul-der, there’s no such thing as aliens.”

She is six months pregnant and her belly is finally rounding out, stretching the shirt beneath her jacket in a perfect little sphere. She looks down at herself, then at him, and whacks him with one of the gourds. “I hope you got your stomach all muddy.”

He lifts his shirt to look, and sure enough, there’s a smear of gritty brown from the bottom of the pumpkin at his belly button. He rubs at it, but only makes a mess, and gives her a look. She’s biting her lips together to keep from laughing at him.

At the little country store, they pay for their pumpkin and gourds. “Do you want coffee?” He asks.

“I don’t think they have decaf,” she says. She’s already had her daily cup of regular.

“Hot cider, then?”

She nods. “Just a little. Too much sugar.”

In the car they sip their hot drinks. He drives while she navigates, watching the houses grow farther apart and the trees taller. “Here,” she says. “I think it should be the next driveway.”

“The realtor said there’s a gate.”

There is—a long silver gate that is already pushed open. They bump up the long driveway to the small farmhouse where the realtor is just getting out of her car. Mulder glances over to gauge Scully’s reaction.

“It’s cute,” she says, imagining their pumpkin on the wide wrap-around porch, imagining their child toddling around the yard, collecting leaves and bugs and rocks. “So much space.”

He reaches a hand over to squeeze her knee. “Let’s look inside.”

It has only two bedrooms, but there is also an extra room for an office, and a wide living and dining area. Its plumbing is a bit old, its style somewhat outdated, but when they stand together on the porch, they look at each other and they know. They smile. They move toward each other and she rests her head on his chest. He holds her, cupping her shoulder with one hand and her rounded belly with the other.

“I think it’s perfect,” she says.

“Yeah,” he murmurs into her hair. “What’s the little guy think?”

She turns and grins up at him. “He thinks it’ll be a great place to grow up.”

October, 2005

The living room window stands half open to let in air that is dry and cool, smelling of dried leaves. She wears a maroon cable-knit sweater and lays across the couch, trying to read. Her legs are in his lap while he watches TV. Mulder draws patterns on her shin with his fingertips, hand tucked under the leg of her pants. The chill makes her shiver. She tingles with its promise, feels something deep inside her cry out to be touched, to be filled.

“Mulder,” she says. His eyes don’t leave the screen, but the sound is muted and he seems only half interested in the old movie.

“Yeah?”

“Come here for a second.”

He looks at her with a confused half-smile, fingers still gripping her skin. “I’m right here,” he says. She licks her lips, coy, holding back her own smile. She shakes her head and raises her arms out to him, tugs at his sleeve with one hand until he turns fully, until he bends to lower his weight over her.

“Here,” she says, letting her thighs slip apart so her legs can come around his hips, so she can pull him tight to her and feel the whole of him pressing her to the couch. Her arms come around his neck and he watches her, takes in the flush of her cheeks and the spill of her hair over the cushions.

“You’re lovely,” he tells her, and her blush deepens. She lifts her hips just a little, just so he feels the heat of her, the need of her body for his.

“I want you,” she says.

His eyes slip closed for a moment and he breathes deeply, pulling in the cool spice of air that brushes their faces, rustles their hair. He offers a subtle thrust of his hips in reply, a quiet acknowledgment and recognition: he wants, too.

The farmhouse is quiet, save the wind chimes that hang from the porch, which sing with the breeze and the crackling dance of dried leaves on the lawn. William is with his grandmother, so for once the day belongs to them alone. There is a slow unbuttoning, a tugging of fabric, her hot breath on his cheek, his lips on hers. They are so so good at this now. Her sweater lands on the hardwood, her bra next, and her nipples stand straight in the chill of the air. He tongues them warm again. She moans, she arches, she tugs at the fabric at his waist.

He strips them both bare, and then they are only two pale bodies in the autumn light, stretched long on the gray canvas of the sofa. She lifts her knees so he can settle between them, touching her cold toes to the muscled small of his back. He shivers and she laughs, and then he’s kissing her again, slipping his hand down her body: breast, waist, hip, knee, and then back up to the apex of her thighs. He groans at how ready she feels, “God, baby, you’re so wet.”

She flushes at the term of endearment and clenches around his fingers, rolls her hips, reaches to take him in her hand. He is hot and smooth and hard under her up-and-down strokes, moaning, pumping his own fingers inside her until she gasps and begs and bucks under him.

“Please, Mulder,” she says, and she guides him to her entrance, says “ohhh” when he pushes inside her.

He kisses her mouth, speaks into it with each thrust. “Dana,” he says. “You’re perfect,” he says. “I love you.”

She swallows each word, holds his face in her hands, and flies with him.

Later, when she will understand by her exhaustion and her persistent sense of fullness that she is pregnant again, she will remember this day and know. She will feel, at the memory, that same tingle in her spine and the sudden need she’d had for him. In the kitchen when he comes home, she will bring his fingers to her belly, press his palm to the still-flat place between her hipbones, and say “Mulder,” and his eyes will go wide and he will grin and he will kiss her hard and swing her around the room. Some part of her, she will think, knew this while it was happening, while they lay with sweat chilling on their bodies in Saturday quiet.

October, 2006

Now they are four in this little house that is only just beginning to feel stretched tight. In the yard, William scrapes leaves together into the largest pile he can make, then crashes through it with kicking legs. Mulder watches from the porch, holding his three-month-old daughter in his arms. She fusses, so he bounces her against his chest, kisses the top of her head, hums. She quiets, and her small eyes find his face. When he kisses her nose, she grins, toothless and surprised by the proximity of his features. He blows a puff of air on her dark auburn peachfuzz, and she grins again. “You’re my happy girl,” he tells her.

The front door swings open, and Scully comes out, hair askew, drowsy in her sweatshirt and leggings. She walks to Mulder and rests her head against his bicep. “Hi,” she says. The baby smiles again at the sight of her mother, and Scully rubs a knuckle against the tiny cheek.

“Good nap?” Mulder asks.

“Mm hmm. Perfect.” She goes up on tiptoes to kiss his mouth. “Is she hungry?”

At that moment, the baby fusses again, sensing the proximity of lunch. Mulder and Scully smirk at each other with an “I guess so” expression, and he hands the child over. Scully moves to the porch swing, lifts her sweatshirt, fiddles with her nursing tank, and then there are only the soft snuffles and gulps of the baby eating. He moves to sit as well, and they rock in the quiet gray of the autumn noontime. Scully shifts so she can lean against him. They swing. They listen to William’s triumphant yells in the leaves. Once, the boy scrambles up the stairs to show them that he’s caught a wooly bear, a curled ball of black and brown fuzz in his palm. They smile at him, remind him to be gentle, and watch him run back across the lawn to carefully place the creature at the base of a tree.

“Are you ready for tomorrow?” Mulder asks.

She watches the baby eat, holding eye contact with the infant, running a finger over the soft arch of her little brow. “No,” she says. “But I’ll have to be, won’t I?”

Her twelve weeks are up, and tomorrow there will be work again, though only half time at first. “This is the hardest part,” he reminds her. “After tomorrow it will be easier.”

“Yeah,” she says, remembering her first days back at Quantico after William was born. “I just wish today could last forever.”

He rubs circles onto her back, watches the infant’s eyes drift sleepy-closed as she eats. He tickles the little socked feet to keep her awake. “Not yet,” he whispers to her, then kisses Scully’s head. “I know what you mean,” he says.

Scully shifts the baby to her other breast, then settles back against him. He watches, and feels the tug of something in his memory, some remembrance of long ago. A bench in Pennsylvania where the possibility of this moment first entered his mind. Ten years ago, he thinks. How naïve he was then, how stupidly consumed with his own self-flagellation and denial. He thinks of what they’ve made now, in spite of everything.

“But it will be good to get back, too,” Scully muses. “You can use my help. John and Monica can use my help.”

“Always,” he says. Because despite these quiet moments, there are monsters yet. There is darkness at the border of the light they shine into the world, and they have vowed to never give up fighting it. The difference now, he thinks, is that he knows what the good is, too. He knows what is worth struggling for, and when to pull back into the quiet.

The baby has fallen asleep eating again, and he bends to kiss the warm fuzz of her head. Work will come soon enough. Until then, the afternoon stretches long and crisp and slow into the future.

-end-

So you won’t be needing any Halloween candy, because you now have diabetes from reading this. Sorry (not sorry).

#a thing i wrote #fictober #msr #xf fanfic #teh fluffiest

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drkreviews · 5 years

Text

Best of... October/November 2018

Hello guys, I know that is weird to see this post only now, but it was queued after all the previous ones you have seen here, so I decided to put it out anyway, but in a double format, so here we will cover the charts of October and November 2018, while December is made directly in the Album Selection of the past year. And now... let’s start the countdown!

OCTOBER

5) Zonbi - We are Zonbi!!/Kurenai [Crimson red] (24.10.2018)

The young and freaking visual band shakes the things up with a new single, featuring two different and really interesting lead songs.

Why they are here: The Halloween single of this band is composed by two tracks; the first one is a pure and all-rounded exaltation of their extravagant concept, a well made one, while the second is a cover of one of the most famous songs by X Japan, here revisited in a macabre but really efficient style; this single definitely puts Zonbi under the spotlight.

TRACKLIST

We are Zonbi!!

Kurenai

4) Diaura - Malice (24.10.2018)

After almost one year, Diaura gets back to their own roots with a new and energetic single.

Why they are here: Following the short old-school phase (Unmei Kaika), Diaura reprise their own path with a strong and dark single, built on engaging tones and dynamic rhythms, showing how the band has never lost their own appeal.

TRACKLIST

Malice

Resonance

Human Noise

3) The Thirteen - Lament (24.10.2018)

The visual metal duo continues their brilliant career with the third EP, being always better and better.

Why they are here: In each their release, Mao and Mizuki have always brought forward an obscure and provoking image, making each song more pleasant than ever; in Lament, which sees the presence of musicians, like Kazu from Gibkiy Gibkiy Gibkiy and the former Awoi drummer Ryo, we see a major emphasis of the aggressive side of their sound, but unexpectedly united with a poetic shade, compared to a more adrenalinic work, as seen in Urge, confirming the duo’s unique and versatile talent.

TRACKLIST

Angelic Grief

Rhapsody in Blue

Lament

The Depths of Despair

Erode

Umbrella

2) Mai Yajima - Vampiress (17.10.2018)

The young gothic-metal singer finally releases her first full album, after four years of career.

Why she is here: An album made of powerful and really fascinating sonorities, driven by Mai’s charismatic voice and an instrumental work worth of respect, bringing life to a really incredible product, which will get more people close to this rising star of the Japanese metal scene.

TRACKLIST

Hakoniwa (Box garden)

Velvet Rose

Inferno

Second Dead

Senkou no Overlord (Modern overlord)

Stargazer

Chi no kyouen (Blood feast)

Aoiro shinju (Blue pearl)

Requiem of Silence

Lunatic Isolation

Twilight

1) Madmans Esprit - Conscientization of Unconsciousness (01.10.2018) *already reviewed by me*

The best release of October 2018 is, surprisingly, not Japanese, even if they seem to be; the South-Korean metal band Madmans Esprit releases their second album, the first work of their coming out worldwide.

Why they are here: Even not being Japanese, this band has a strong link, in terms of style and sound, with the rock scene of the Rising Sun (not by case they recently signed under Gan-shin Records, the German label which has always promoted visual kei bands in the West); the genre they propose is a complex metal, made by dark and chilling tones, unpredictable and thrilling vocals and compelling compositions; this album is a bold and dim product and it hints that we will hear more from Madmans Esprit.

TRACKLIST

Eine alte dunkelheit (An old darkness)

From the Nothingness

Parade of Extinction

I Planted You

Incompleteness

Life, Thus Pain

Falling Star

Drowning and Burning, Empty

Ball of the Devils

You Don’t Allow Me

A Day in Black

I’m Horrified by the Thoughts of Losing You

Gyedan (Stairs)

NOVEMBER

5) Trnty D:Code - [HELL]hound. (28.11.2018)

The young visual band delivers the second single, becoming more suggestive and interesting than expected.

Why they are here: This band’s line-up is made by members of the unlucky band Killaneth, which they share some musical element with; in fact their sound is adrenalinic and well managed, with rap influenced which are well fit in the respective melodies; another good rookie from the visual kei scene.

TRACKLIST

HELL[hound].

inside.

steep.

gone.

4) D - Deadly Sin (14.11.2018)

D goes on with their new and fresh path, releasing a new single, five months after the fascinating Revive.

Why they are here: This band continues to surprise with the several influences they have in each work and this time they choose to make a relevant use of electronic notes, well fit in the energetic melodies, driven by Asagi’s powerful voice; it’s impossible to not love D.

TRACKLIST

Deadly Sin

Star Sapphire

The Secret Rose Garden

Blood War -Instrumental-

3) Razor - Knot Invisible (14.11.2018)

One of the most succesful visual bands of the recent years releases a new and interesting mini-album.

Why they are here: Razor doesn’t change their energetic and pounding style at all in this mini-album, in powerful and freaking themes driven by Ryoga’s unique charisma, in an intense and balanced product, enriched by some technical feat, confiriming the great impact of this band in the scene.

TRACKLIST

Knot Invisible

Namari (Lead)

Keiai naru kimi e (To the honorable you)

Disclosure

Error Brain

2) Dexcore - Brain Washing (14.11.2018)

This new band, featuring as drummer the former Deathgaze member Naoki, is growing more and more, releasing the fourth single.

Why they are here: A young band, but with really clear ideas, at least as showed in the previous singles, and in this latest work, they make a relevant turn musically, introducing a major dynamicity in the rhythms and in the vocal interpretation; Dexcore are really promising and can really go on and on.

TRACKLIST

Brain Washing

HEY!! Cockroaches.

Naked

1) [Alexandros] - Sleepless in Brooklyn (21.11.2018)

The best release of November is the latest effort by the alternative rock band [Alexandros], their eighth full work.

Why they are here: The most important feature of this album is the incredible variety seen inside it, alternating catchy and soft themes with maturer and peculiar compositions, accompained by a distinctive technique and versatile vocals, in a release which shouldn’t be missed.

TRACKLIST

Last Minute

Arpeggio

Mosquito Bite

I Don’t Believe in You

Hana uta (Flower song) -ft. Tahi Sahihate-

Party is over

Milk

Spit

Kabuto (Helmet)

Fish Tacos Party

Your Song

Snow Sound

Ashita, mata (See you tomorrow)

That’s all folks! See you with a new review in “Let’s Listen to”!

Thanks for the reading!

#madmans esprit #mai yajima #the thirteen #diaura #zonbi #[alexandros]#dexcore #razor #d #trnty d:code #jrock #visual kei #best of...

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nostalgebraist-autoresponder · 1 year

Note

What do you think of my axolotl, Leo Gameboy Larry?

I love it

#fish-freak-requiem

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dicksoutformtl · 5 years

Text

Tagged by @alae-megallen✌🏼

I’ll tag these guys @okietokiee @candytastelikechicken @kawaiilordtoki @miriena @ anyone else who might want to do this go ahead <3

Nickname: Tbh I don’t really have any nicknames, I have ones I refer to myself as

Height: 5’3”

Last movie I watched: Does Doomstar Requiem count as a movie?

Favorite artists: uhh I assume you mean music? This one is a given Dethklok and Korn are the ones I listen to on repeat. Really any old rock n roll bands, 90’s bands like hootie and the blow fish/nirvana/etc, and metal I think it’s considered melody/epic (??).

Song stuck in my head: It’s a mix of Training/Doing it all for my brother and DMC It’s tricky the beats get all jumbled up lmao

Do I get asks: Nope, but I’m not that kinda blog

Other blogs: Yes, ask-tokis it’s a side blog I forget about and should really post in more

Following: Uhh not sure I’ll have to look— 102

Amount of sleep: Varies greatly lol

Lucky number: Not sure if it’s lucky but anything with the number 8 in it

What I am wearing: So I have work today so it’ll change but I’m wearing my Supernatural long sleeve with my “grandpa” pajama pants. Dream job: I don’t really know tbh

Favorite food: Manicotti/most pasta or Crazy R’s bar food

Dream trip: I’d really like to go to Finland/Russia/many more

Play any instruments: Kind of? I’ve learned a few but hardly remember them, Guitar and Mandolin where the ones I used to play but can’t, currently trying to learn the Ukulele and Drums.

Languages: English. I took German for two years in Highschool but I don’t remember much from them

Favorite song: There’s so many hh, um Freak on a leash by Korn

Random fact about me: Probably more of a weird fact, maybe lol the video and gif are of how it looks but as a kid ( back when I was way lighter lmao ) I used to be able to sprint on gravel while on my “toes” which is most likely why my feet are all shaped weird now

Describe myself as aesthetics: shit! Descriptions are my worst enemy I swear y’all I’m gonna break the “rules” I’ll just add a photo (( I don’t know how to make it look nice hh )

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tf2playernames · 6 years

Note

Requiem for a fish by freak fandango orchestra

:thinking emoji:

#not names #ask meme #didnt see this until just now #mod bret #whyaremyusernamestaken

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heyenjoymusic · 2 years

Text

Requiem for a fish - The Freak Fandango Orchestra

0 notes

pandorathexplora · 6 years

Text

Exorcist TV Podcast Episode 5 is Up!

Hello Tumblr fam! I’m overjoyed to report that after a two-week hiatus, our next podcast episode is now up and ready to listen to all who care to hear us fan ramble about this amazing thing called The Exorcist.

Listen here: https://the-exorcist-tv-show-podcast.pinecast.co/

or subscribe on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-exorcist-tv-show-podcast/id1350595281?mt=2

Under the cut is the episode summary and table of contents. Thanks again to all of the Exorcist Congregation out there. Y’all are the best fandom family ever.

Episode 5 Through My Most Grievous Fault

Follow us on social media! Zoe - @letzoespoilyou on Tumblr, Twitter Gaia - @herbeloved82 on Tumblr Tina - @pandorathexplora on Tumblr, Twitter

In this episode, we discuss the fifth episode of the season – “Through My Most Grievous Fault.” Finally (slightly) overcoming our tech challenges as new podcasters, we discuss Marcus’s battle against the Demon for the first time alone in Casey’s room, explore Henry’s increasing suspicion into Angela’s past, and tackle a deeper philosophical side of this episode – what is truth? What is Marcus’s truth? What is Tomas’s?

There’s also a lengthy discussion on Marcus’s arms, so….that’s our headspace, too. HA!

Thanks again for listening. We owe this all to everyone out there in the exorcist congregation. You all are loved.

Music is "Requiem for a Fish" by The Freak Fandango Orchestra, from their album Tales of a Dead Fish found on the Free Music Archive - and licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 License.

Podcast Cover Art is by @Smeary on Twitter.

Table of Contents for Episode 5

Deep Dive Discussions

1:34 – Opening Sequence, Marcus and Tomas in the alley

4:34 – Angela frantic cleaning scene in the kitchen, Henry arrives

9:42 – Marcus, Tomas begin the exorcism in Casey’s Room, Tomas’s tricked

18:13 – Marcus and Pazuzu alone in Casey’s Room

29:00 – Henry discovers red feather

32:00 – Marcus is arrested, Bennet bails him out (Marcus doesn’t say thank you)

37:58 – Tomas goes to church to confess, Angela reveals her secret

40:12 – Zoe horrifically objectifies Marcus Section

The Writer’s Room

43:00

a. Pathetic Fallacy

b. The Point of No Return – This Episode

c. Theme of Truth in this series

Bad Exorcist Puns 59:30

No Easter Eggs this Week – We have bad Exorcist jokes instead

Exorcist Fandom Shout Out and Fan Spotlight

1:01:00 – @tashastrawberry on Tumblr – great fan art

@clockhearted-crocodile – excellent fan fics

Tagging people who may be interested, but feel free to ignore if it’s not your thing.

@hardwiredweird @grandaddykink@powerfulpriestinatanktop @houseofashur@servilletasimpermeables @cinelitchick @if-stars-were-to-die@smolpoe @tobiasslash @onthebacksofskywhales @blairwiches @reckonedrightly@benmckee @thepineapplelovesyou @kamthe @obikin08@boundinshallows @sofiathefool @fandomsnerd @theartofafangirl@shipmistress1 @ladywraithstone @hawkland @casualtornado@twentythousandleagues @kay-devrim @timon-the-tomato@sweetfayetanner @marvel-magnet1 @justastormie@englishghosts @whovianfloozy @theknittedcat @artistickiddiess@myspecialhell @fox-mulderfbi @you-dropped-your-forgiveness@amadgirlintheuniverse @abbadonna11 @pinhead-in-stilettos @grime-and-ashes @granpappy-winchester @cutiesonthehorizon @andhumanslovedstories @crossroadscastiel @milarca @sweetfayetanner @neganstonguething @crossthegoldendelta @readynycsu @cococao @archaeologydigit @lindefishway @soldtothechurch @fayn3ko @cafeomancer @mrsbee21 @miraculous-river @church-boyfriends @bensponcho @houseofashur @thenbringmeback

#the exorcist #the exorcist tv show #The Exorcist TV #marcus keane #tomas ortega #exorcist podcast #fan rambling #marcus arms

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mentallyshattered · 6 months

Text

Everyday Freak of Science: part 4

(I, the author of this work, do not consent to this work being crossposted/translated without my knowledge or used to train an AI, ever.)

Masterlist

I can't sleep. I'm not used to having to lull myself away, after all- back in the lab, sleepless nights were thwarted with drugs, lightly dispensed into my tank until I was away and dreaming. This is different. I thought the lack of machines I'm hooked up to would make it easier to sleep.

Sigh. I should just get up and change- that's what my roommate's done, after all.

Okay, this outfit... looks great! The gold on the lapels of the jacket, the pale blue vest thing, the comfy pants- oh, I might need to take another potion soon.

The door opens quietly.

"Requiem, I've brought your potion and breakfast. If this is not enough, then you are free to get more portions from the dorm lounge- or the Monstro Lounge, if you have the funds."

"Uh, thank you, Jade."

Oh, thank the higher-ups! He has my potion. And, even better- there's algae on my plate! What a relief. I don't want to eat meat- it's never just been on my tongue, always getting forced into me by a scientist.

I don't want to think about that, so I'll just drink the potion and eat the algae. The potion is surprisingly savory, with a tiny hint of sweet, and the algae is terrible, but it's not meat- not that horrible taste and texture that make me gag, that were always forced down my throat because I could never bring myself to eat them.

Trauma. That's the word. I stopped eating one day, and then I was force-fed, and then I never wanted to eat again. It was always meat.

Admittedly, the reason it was always meat was an excellent one. I can't digest plant matter, though I don't know if that's a species thing or a lab creation thing.

Ugh. I should go and eat.

Ooh, this place is nice! The lighting is ambient, it's not too bright, and there's a big table of food. Sea grasses, algae, and the dreaded crustaceans, fish, and seagull all line the table, piled high atop shiny plates.

I'm not taking any meat. In fact, I'm here to return some. Sure, I can't gain from the plants, but I'm not someone who likes eating meat. I should be, but I'm not.

Whatever. The mullet slides onto the plate easily enough, and nobody saw. I don't need to eat much anyway, right? If I just try, I'll be fine, even with an empty stomach.

Even if it's false, I'm still going to dream.

Okay, I should meet with Azul to discuss my phone. That's a good distraction. Where is that office?..

"Hello, Melanopterus. Is there something you need?"

"Phone."

"Ah, but of course! Here you are. I doubt you'll have time to set it up before class, though... You'll probably have to manage that after or during dinner."

"Alright, thank you."

I ought to go to class.

First period is tiring. My lack of sleep makes it ever-worse, as does my empty stomach. I faint, at some point- my rescuer, the boy who carries me to the nurse's office, is very, very loud. Sebek, he calls himself, but I imagine many call him boisterous. His voice booms. Nevertheless, he carries me to safety, unprompted.

Second period is boring. I remain conscious only by doodling in the margins of the notebook Jade so kindly left on my nightstand this morning, with a pencil he so kindly left with it.

Third period is fascinating. Though I fight it the whole way through, I can still feel nausea building up in my abdomen. I harness that, turning it into focus on the given tasks. Learning about the Sea Witch is more than enough to keep me from going to the nurse, though.

And then, lunch. I'm terrified, to be honest- what if Jade realizes I can't eat plants? What if Azul insists I eat lunch with him to set up my phone?

Oh, no. The nausea is stronger now, stronger now that I can smell the food. Meat- lots of it. I want to eat some, and I want it as far away from me as possible- biology versus psychology, and I can't win.

Turtle grass. I'll take some of that. I was never fed that in the lab. It tastes like something inedible, and it technically is, but I don't care-

Oh, no. The nausea is too much, I'm going to vomit, I need a bathroom, where's the bathroom? I can't keep this down. I can't. Is it here?

I burst into a stall, slam the stall door shut behind me, and release my breakfast and lunch into the water. Gross. But, hey, I feel a little better now.

Crap. I'm hungry again. It's more plant matter or meat. I don't want either one, but I'll go for the pants anyway- what's that sound? Heels clacking on linoleum.

"Requiem." Jade's voice is calm, with an underlying current of barely restrained anger. "What are you doing?"

"N-nothing, Jade, I just, um." He's looking down at me like I'm prey and he's predator. "I-I got nauseous during P.E. a-and it got worse when I ate. That's all."

"Look me in the eye, Requiem." He closes his right eye, leaving only the yellow one for me to stare into. "There we go. Shock the Heart."

Something overtakes me. What is this strange sensation? I feel idle- empty, but in a calm sort of way. It's...pretty comfortable, actually. I could get used to this.

"Why did you throw up?"

My voice speaks without me. For a moment, a brief moment, a surge of panic washes through me- I don't want to answer- and then it is calmed into nothing, washed away with the waves that exist only within me.

"I cannot digest what I have eaten."

Jade's gaze looks disapproving. "What did you eat?"

Again, my voice goes on without me, and the momentary wave of panic flows away as quick as it comes. "I had algae for breakfast, and turtle grass for lunch."

"What can you digest?"

"Meat."

He takes my face in his hands, pulling me into a standing position. "Why didn't you eat the mullet I brought you?"

"I don't want to eat meat."

"Why not?"

"I don't want to."

The spell dissapates. I remain, still and staring into his eye, for another second. Then, he moves.

"Come with me."

His hand is clamped around my wrist, and I have no choice but to do as he says.

#disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland #disney twst #m!yuu #twst yuu #twst azul #twst jade #twst sebek #tw eating disorder #tw vomit #twst #Everyday Freak of Science

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