#genius moment from me

[prosebushpatch]

Okay so I recently, finally, watched Wish and I have some thoughts. Overall, not as bad as everyone makes it out to be, but still has a lot of fundamental story problems and I've got to get them off of my chest. I'll mostly be focused on Magnifico because I think his motivations and arc largely represent the problem with the overall theme.

Okay so my biggest problem with Magnifico is his motivation. His tragic backstory. How on earth does he go from losing his whole family to thinking, the only way he can prevent that from happening again is to grant wishes? The logic doesn't track. It almost makes sense in his creating a kingdom where he protects everyone and "doesn't even charge rent," but it does not make sense with his wish granting. Having a great need to be control to make sure he doesn't lose anyone ever again can be a compelling motivation for a villain, where we see lines crossed that don't justify the intent, but in the movie, he's too self-absorbed to seem to have any actual care for the people of Rosas.

I think if the motivation was changed to something like Magnifico had once been a bright-eyed, enthusiastic wish granter who blindly believed all wishes were good but learned the hard way that that wasn't true could have been a better fit for the overall goal of the movie. Imagine that he granted a wish for a wicked person who used that wish to hurt others, or if Magnifico granted a wish but that wish ended up ruining the person's life because what they wanted wasn't what they needed (i.e. Remember The Princess and the Frog? Dig a little deeper) and that person could have went after Magnifico and blamed him for their troubles (harkening back to We Don't Talk about Bruno). This would be an understandable tragic backstory for Magnifico, and better explain why he's so careful about the wishes he grants. And, perhaps the reason he keeps the wishes he doesn't want to grant is to keep the people in his kingdom docile. No one will be angry with him for not granting their wishes if he makes them forget them and lose that drive and motivation, which makes more sense than the unexplained hording them like he does in the movie? Why does he keep them in the movie other than admiring the wishes? It doesn't make sense to me.

This would give Asha more of a reason to oppose him, if it's shown how his desire to not get hurt or to inadvertently cause hurt turned into a paranoia where he drains people of wishes to fly or play music that inspires others. And, as a side note, we need to see more of how Rosas is a kingdom of people who lack drive and motivation, where only those younger than 18 have that special part of them that inspires them to chase after a dream (something that Astor Rhymemaster touched on). Because that's the point of wishes, right? That's the point of the entire Disney canon. A dream is a wish your heart makes. That star can only get you so far, it takes hard work and determination. It's wanting something better in life, it's dreaming of leaving behind all you know to chase after a tangible light. It's finding a new dream, it's finding a new wish as you grow and learn about yourself and the world.

I don't think the movie Wish understood what makes wishes so important in Disney stories. You know what wishes do? They ignite change. It's not about getting what you want, it's about finding the courage to chase after something better. Ariel wants to be where the people are, but really she wants to be somewhere where others are willing to understand her and in the end, she finds that and makes amends with her father, who finally is willing to see her for who she is. Rapunzel wants to see the lights, and that desire pushes her to leave a tower she's been trapped in her whole life, learning that the world is not as cruel and cold as her abusive mother told her. Cinderella wants to go to the ball, to dance with people who treat her as a person and not a servant of cinders and ash. That wish is granted by a fairy godmother and gives her a hope that is worth fighting for, a hope that helps her reclaim what is rightfully hers; a glass slipper that fits only her and the love that comes with it.

Wishes inspire change. The movie should have been about that. Magnifico could have been right, that some wishes inspire negative change that can drag down multiple people. The kingdom of Rosas could have been so placid because change is scary. Maybe Magnifico could have convinced people, after taking their wish, that it wasn't worth it. Maybe the wish ceremonies could have changed so it wasn't portrayed as some sort of lottery everyone looks forward to, but Magnifico would grant wishes on the spot if he decided they were good and worthwhile, and he would lock away the wishes that would cause trouble and tribulations. 18 year olds could be enthusiastic to give him their wishes, thinking they were surely good and worth granting, only to forget their wish and be told that their wish would have only brought about their unhappiness, this would have justified a more solemn tone in the kingdom, setting up a world where people are mostly downtrodden, thinking their wishes are bad and pointless and they're better off without them. Imagine Cinderella or Rapunzel being told their wishes weren't good, reinforcing all the things their abusive families tell them, taking away that hope and courage to find something better for themselves.

Here's where the true conflict could come in. Asha could be onto this from the beginning, and her opening song could have been about this concern that the people who didn't get their wishes granted aren't willing to try at all. (Because, after all, why doesn't Sabino play music at all? Having that taken from him would take so much joy and creative expression from his life!) But why does Asha know something is amiss?

Simon.

Imagine that Magnifico has a strict rule not to ever share your wish with another person because then it wouldn't come true. It makes sense with our own superstitions, and then makes it so that no one knows anyone else's wishes. Maybe your best friend changes so drastically after giving up their wish, but you believe, like everyone else, that their wish would have only caused suffering. What can you do about it? Well what if Simon told Asha about his wish? What if Asha knew his wish wasn't dangerous and couldn't imagine a way that it could go wrong? That would give her a reason to doubt Magnifico and put more emphasis on how Simon has lost his drive like all the other adults in the kingdom. And it can also emphasize in the end that sharing your wishes and dreams with others can be a powerful thing. Just the act of sharing your dreams can inspire others to go after their own, and they can give you the encouragement to chase your wish too. Wishes inspire change, love gives you the courage to make it happen.

Imagine if the star boy used to be a human, who wished to help others and lost his humanity to do it. Imagine his wish confirms Magnifico's belief, that wishes cause suffering because star boy lost his tether to earth and is separated from the people he loves. Imagine how he foils Asha who also wants to grant everyone's wishes. Imagine him ensuring she doesn't make the same mistake he did while she gives him a reason to change again, to anchor himself to humanity again because he loves her enough not to leave for forever.

Imagine the movie confirming that, yes, change is scary. Chasing your dreams won't always make things better. You might fail more than you succeed and some wishes cannot coincide with each other, leading to grief and strife. But some wishes are worth it. Sometimes, chasing after something better and failing is worth leaving a worse situation. Sometimes taking that chance is worth it, and, like in all fairy tales, if you are kind and generous and act with love, that will make all the difference in the end.

Also, I know everyone wished for a Magnifico and Amaya evil power couple, but imagine if Magnifico was truly in love with Amaya, as he is in the movie, but that love is eventually his undoing. Like Amaya leaps in front of Asha, and Magnifico stops or redirects his attack because she's the one thing he loves more than himself and that is the weakness that Asha and co can take advantage of. Imagine Amaya keeping Magnifico in the mirror and he gets to dote on her from his imprisonment for forever. I'm just saying. At least 30 sickos like me would be into that. Imagine the depth it would give to the themes of love and change and wishing and how acts of love make all the difference.

Alright, I'll get off my soap box. I just really wish Wish could have been stronger because these fairy tales Disney is famous for matter. They really do. But the movie feels too stale and shallow and too much of a cash grab that knows the outline of a disney musical, but is unable to understand the heart of why they work.

#rose and rambles #wish 2023 #disney #disney wish #if you read anything i post let it be this im shaking the bars of my cage #I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS ABOUT FAIRY TALES AND DREAMS LET ME AT THE PEOPLE WHO MADE WISH SO SHALLOW #ILL MAKE THEM TEA AND GIVE THEM A GOOD SCOLDING #WHILE STEALING THEIR CLOTHES AND PUTTING ON A FAKE MUSTACHE TO TAKE OVER WHILE THEY'RE NIBBLING ON NICE COOKIES #THAT'S A TOTALLY NORMAL THING TO DO RIGHT #if you want to tell a good story you gotta tell it yourself <- my villain origin story #or at least my Sebastian kiss the girl moment. i can't believe they took out star boy. God forbid independent women have romantic interests #anyway im obsessed with how Magnifico always called Amaya “my love” and i think we can do beautiful and twisted things with that #Also i kind of hate the whole 'oh there's no saving him from this evil magic corruption' like le please that's the most stupid thing to eve #be in a fairy tale #just proves these people didn't actually read the snow queen #also also go watch Astor Rhymemaster she's a genius and explains songs IN SUCH AN IN DEPTH WAY #i haven't interacted with much other wish stuff so idk how others are rewriting it but this my ideal

[jabberwockprince]

apparently it's way easier to plan scenes and plotpoints for a fanfic if i draw them first, so here we are <3 featuring me rambling abt this scene under the cut!!

i was specifically thinking about Haym and Rikki's entire relationship?

especially very early on, right when Rikki is properly assigned as Neon J's apprentice and whatnot. this was meant to be the moment Rikki realizes they're not coping very well with leaving Ban behind in Beachside Archipelago, and how they're actually gravitating towards Haym because of how similar he feels to Ban - yknow. being the same model and all

cause Rikki has some serious issues with needing absolute control over every aspect of their life. and right now, they're stuck with a job they don't exactly care for, trying desperately to suck up to Neon J so he'll actually promote Rikki to a DECENT job designing security bots for Vinyl City, not BABYSITTING 1010

(which isn't even babysitting, moreso than being monitored 24/7 in a localized space where they can't be shady since Neon J doesnt. trust them. at all. for various valid reasons)

so witnessing Haym pull some stupid but well-meaning stunt to force Rikki show off how good they are at fixing and repairing shit makes Rikki go????

A LITTLE FERAL????

BECAUSE THEY UNCONSCIOUSLY PROJECT ALL THEIR UNRESOLVED FEELINGS ABOUT BAN ONTO HAYM

but they only realize this when their body shuts down and cannot act the way they would've wanted, seeing Haym entirely fucking wrecked being very similar to how they found Ban when they first met makes them spiral a little

Haym doesn't even KNOW he's not the original Yellow model, he has his suspicions but is overall kept in the dark. befriending Rikki is something he does entirely out of genuine curiosity, motherfucker has no clue he's in the middle of a 4 year long unresolved break-up between two losers who are constantly pining after each other both romantically and platonically

im thinkingggg Haym might be seeking out Rikki's presence mostly because he's noticed that they treat him slightly different than the others. not necessarily better, just different enough to get him curious. so the need to build an identity away from 1010 as a group/unit and his inherent curiosity just gets him into this mess

#no straight roads #no straight roads oc #nsr oc #nsr yellow #nsr haym #rikki nsr #ban nsr #purinsu art #this was meant to be my selfindulgent fanfic where the polycule is happy and shit #but its the most annoying slowburn ever bc 80% of the time is dedicated to just. #everyone sorting out their emotional baggage and learning to tell the difference between who they are #vs who they want to be vs what the world expects of them #haym and rikki probably have? the most confusing dynamic out of all #which is so fucking funny to me because aside from these really loaded moments?? theyre chilling most of the time #the total opposite to rin and rikki's dynamic. where they wont stop arguing and never see eye to eye #but are one of the healthiest dynamics in this mess. cause they get each other on a level that they CANT understand #anyway its pretty hard to portray a genius engineer when youve never. touched a wrench in your life #ALL I DID WAS WOODWORK IN SHOP CLASS LEAVE ME OLONE #anyway rikki's workplace is not osha compliant bc they dont care abt electrical hazards #bc they Cant Be Affected By Them

[cashmere-caveman]

sometimes someone will reblog my "silver lied in the finale no idea abt what tho" post and their tags all full of #flinthamilton angst and i just really am forcefully reminded that even though we all watched the same show . we did not in fact watch the same show. like yes their affair is basically what set the whole plot in motion and i really love thomas as a plot device but i do have to confess that idc abt thomas as a person at all lmfao

#like i wont stop u from making the finale abt flinthamilton thats ur right go crasy go silly etc but to me that is just not whats happening #thomas being there or not is abt whether or not silver is lying about this particular detail it is not abt unburying ur gays #like. to me at least #idk how else to put it but thomas being there is not abt thomas. it is abt flint and madi and silver and The Narrative #it is abt silver trying to pay off flint with the same thing he sold this war for: a partner #and he is telling this to madi who did not want this about flint who also did not want this #so theyre both making eye contact and are waiting for the other to either flinch or turn back into a person who loves them #its driving me insane. like ur taking a moment as fucked up and genius as this and u decide this is abt colonizer romance #like im not even getting into the fact that imo flint has progressed so far in his ideological journey that they wouldnt see eye to eye #bc woodes rogers is flints mirror but wr is also what thomas mightve become and ur telling me hed happily settle for That? #ok no i'll stop here i need to go say the litany against getting mad online 10x (getting mad online is the mind killer) #black sails #cavetext #once again. live ur truth!!! more power to u!!! but if u do that on my post where i can see it i will inevitably have opinions i fear

[itspileofgoodthings]

I love the rhyming on ttpd. can only think of two examples currently but I know there’s more.

#the dancing phantoms on the terrace do they get second hand embarrassed #is e v e r y t h I n g #but also I can’t stop thinking about: #you. look. like. taylor swift. in this light—we’re lovin’ it #like just the flow. the cadence. not even just the rhyme but #her ease with language and playfulness with it and all the little pockets and corners of so many songs #even ones you think you don’t like. settle in with time! #like the thing about taylor is that she is VERY much a poet #in that some of her genius/way with words is innate #and the images and stuff she uses the turns of phrase can feel so garish and embarrassing on first listen #they JAR #but honestly I think it’s because she is truly …. new? she is doing something NEW #and the shock and outrage that always goes with new things is always present with a Taylor album #and I think she’s drawing on so much from the past to write but she is so deeply rooted in the present cultural moment #so it’s so easy to dismiss her writing on first glance as like. idk a college girl’s idea of poetry #as being too Stark or Melodramatic. #she loves OBVIOUS imagery and extremely dramatic ones too #but she isn’t actually just throwing stuff at the wall #because pretty much always. it starts to land and soften and settle #and the image she’s chosen has done its job of drawing you into a world #and/or communicating an emotion #and sometimes it’s so upsetting. like. get me out of the bedroom with Matty Healy taylor!!!!!!!!!! but. the art is art-ing! #I guess is what I’m saying. she’s good at this it isn’t just hype #but some of it really is that she’s taking us places we might not want to go or are so quick to pass judgment on #as being unworthy of a song or more importantly a poem. but present art HAS to do that #and does do it!!!!!! idk I am just. musing

[iknowwhereyousleepatnight]

while source hunting i found "Determined Raptures": St. Sebastian and the Victorian Discourse of Decadence by Richard A. Kaye which i think is about what i was talking about a few months ago abt st sebastian always being drawn sexually, but it goes into why which is cool

link to me going on abt st sebastian always being so erotic that is mostly for me because i keep losing it and i need a link or else it will be lost forever

#apparently he's a homoerotic icon which. i am not surprised ngl #i also found “Wantoning with the Thighs”: The Socialization of Thigh Sex in England 1590-1730 by Will Fisher #which. #is interesting #anyway let's talk about my day because i want to #i've gathered a lot of sources for my eroticism paper and had a genius bigbrain moment where i realized michelangelo's dying slave #could maybe be a venus pudica (specific pose typically reserved for venus-like figures. aka “modest” venus) #and i was like. yippee!! that's inherently sexual!!!! and it came from my brain so i don't have to cite it #also someone came up to me curious to what i was doing (bc i am spread across a large table w a lot of papers and i keep staring at #michelangelo's slave sculptures. and i have been. for four hours) #and i was like. i'm doing research and it was cool. they like art hist too. yay #also today was my last forensic psych class :(( #so sad. i love that class to death #also i almost got run over by a stupid fucking driver again!!!! >:( #this is because a main pathway for psych students in particular has so many blindspots and The Crosswalk is hiding from drivers #so they just hit the gas and hope no-one's crossing. but i am!!!! pay attention to your surroundings in a moderately high-foot-traffic area

[averysjameson]

idk but saying jennifer lynn barnes sucks at writing romance because your ship wasn't canon is beyond hilarious to me like okay???? HAHHAHAHA. everyone has their own preferences of course but the vehement hatred for jlb and the belittlement of her writing on booktok and bookstagram (sometimes on here) has been ASTOUNDING.

a note about the "poorly done romance/love triangle" in tig: jlb never said it was going to be "even". no one ever said that. personally pioneering the idea that one character was "not given a chance" does not make it a poorly written love triangle or a poorly written romance. in love triangles, there is usually ALWAYS one option who is simply NOT a real option. look me in the eye and tell me characters jeremiah fisher, aspen in the selection series, gale hawthorne, adam kent, jacob black, and i'm sorry but grayson hawthorne amongst a myriad of others were actual contenders for the main character. if you believed they are/wanted them to be, that's great! but all of these characters are in well known love triangles and at the end of the day, books with love triangles WILL sell because they generate conversation and hype around the book. it is a marketing tactic and you are NEVER promised equal opportunity from both love interests. you losing the love triangle or that you believe there is wasted potential doesn't mean bad writing has occurred. also, for the love of god, while you are supposed to relate to a character, you are not the main character!! belly, america, katniss, juliette, avery, what have you, all chose based on who they are as characters. and also, female characters don't have to "experience" both love interests to make a decision. if they want to, that's totally fine, but specifically about avery bc this is what this blog is all about, she absolutely knows what she's "missing out" on with grayson and she doesn't care. shipping averygrayson just blatantly feels like ignoring avery's wants and needs.

anyway, if you want to call jlb's writing poorly done bc you didn't get your way, that's totally fine. you are entitled to your own opinion. it's just funny that you say that bc had grayson and avery been randomly thrown together in the epilogue of tfg or something, i have a feeling you wouldn't be of this opinion.

tldr; love triangles are a marketing tactic and you are neither entitled to a win nor is is poorly done/executed if you lose. love triangles, more often than not, have a clear winner from the beginning (coughcough "see? you're already his") but the debate and drama of another character sells the book.

#the inheritance games #oh god the love triangle discourse is so tiring does it not get OLD???? #averyjameson #avery grambs #avery kylie grambs #jennifer lynn barnes #been a while since i went on a rant #tig #if you disagree idrc bc im not trying to convince you that you can't think something is poorly written #averygrayson #anyway! miss you guys #can't wait for the brothers hawthorne!!!! #i think she's a genius romance writer bc im rr tig and she sprinkles in these moments from the very beginning and wow #she has such a big brain #god booktok is annoying and the comments on jlb's insta posts are so?????? #like imagine the amount of “how dare you not make ag endgame” comments she's gotten (by the same people every post but still) is so weird #“how are you” “what were you thinking” “it was a love triangle and grayson was the right option i'm not reading you books anymore” LOL #or “how are you not let gray be endgame/have avery/be happy” hm avery isn't a prize and gray doesn't let himself be happy hope that helps! #i thought the sad/chronically unhappy thing was y'all's brand for him but suddenly when he doesn't flip a switch and be :D y'all hate it?? #him forgiving himself at the end and letting himself feel was HUGE like ?? ive digressed but tell me you dont understand him w/o telling me

[ariiikat]

A friend noticed I’m back on anime because of my MAL activity

Friend: oiii ariii you returned to anime?

Me: yup!

Friend: …

Friend: it’s because of gay shit right?

Me: yup!

#ariiirambles #g witch #suletta x miorine #witch from mercury #the magical revolution of the reincarnated princess and the genius young lady #anis x euphie #there’s like sooooo much yuri anime that came out while I was off my anime phase #my friend clocked me the moment she saw my recent watches pfffft #also recommend the anime I mention and have been blogging :3 #also if you got a mal account pls give I wanna see some recs

[cannibaltranssexual]

boygenius - "Souvenir" // Hannibal 2x10, 2x13, 3x06, 3x13

#hannibal #words #boygenius #souvenir #i love songs i love music #i thought of this one half asleep at like 1am and thought i was so genius but idk if it makes sense now sjdvkbskdv #also . was trying to find a better screenshot from mizumono that didnt have his face in it because that was important to me for some reason #but instead i accidentally just watched that entire ending scene again . fucking hell #need a moment

[aroacettorney]

perhaps the reason why aup ended like *that* is because it was not supposed to have a happy ending in the first place, but sayren didnt have the guts to deal with readers' backlash for when they finally kill off the main character so a half baked happy ending is what we get 😔

#for a happy ending of a story to be narratively satisfying the characters gotta actively work hard for it #this happy ending feels empty because quite frankly speaking ludger did nothing to deserve it #he has zero character developments from the beginning to the end and has always been the same #well except for his emotional state getting worse over time #bc instead of making any attempt at all to healthily address it like a mentally mature 40yo adult he let it swallow him whole #(not that im necessarily blaming him but its quite frustrating to see him remain unchanged if aup is meant to be a redemption story) #his OPness is inherent #his genius is inherent #(this is not to say he isnt hardworking / only relying on his inborn talents but the author repeatively failed the 'show dont tell' checks) #(bc it was only implied in the past and we've never truly seen it in the canon present timeline either) #his kindness is inherent #ngl dad!ludger content doesnt appeal to me as much as dad!edgeworth cuz the latter is the fruit of the character's growth and hard labor #while the former is well... its just who he is #usually i love found family content but in aup it bores my mind out bc his interactions w the students + owens are so static & predictable #it was heartwarming at the moment of adoption but later on i find it as tedious as reading generic established romantic relationships #was it because of the lack of tensions and conflicts i wonder #they all became his yes men and no one ever actively challenged his unhealthy mindset or behaviors #anyway id have been more interested if he recognized his biases/favoritism/prejudices towards some certain characters & worked to change it #but welp. that would require character growth which is too much to expect from him ig #he has learnt quite nothing from his journey and tbh aup would ironically feel more meaningful if it ended on a tragic note #ofco i got noblesse'd again 😔 #would i kill for aup to have a happy ending? yes #would i rather have a sad ending over the half baked and empty good ending we get? also yes #if it must burn then let the whole world burn. cuz at least it would be more much memorable and impactful that way #and i wouldnt have to feel this disappointed and lose all of my interests in one of my only two beloved aroace MCs in aup </2 #rant

[fourteenthz]

Going insane just thinking about tlovm animating the scene of percy kissing vex right in the day before he pulls the whole "no more tricks" scene with raishan in whitestone. Just. Insane.

#kelly watches cr #im watching it rn and im gonna be honest this gotta be one of my favorite moments of the s1 so far #tal saying “dont stop a man who just kissed someone” or something like that is so funny #but between kiki's rage with raishan and the group being cautious around her percy going all out in a room with his sis + gilmore + allura #is just so big brain... they are going against thordak and putting hundreds and hundreds of ppl in the front lines for THEM #the smartest thing they can do is just lay it out down rn in front of those they trust #it makes easier to discuss a plan that's already impossible of it own and it also works that they have allura and gilmore there #they should know and im so glad they do now. they have more insight with magic than most of vm #PLUS from a viewer side... its SO FUCKING COOL seeing this shit unfold omg tal is a genius #he did it in the most dramatic and safe way possible. and matt talking about cassandra and gilmore and allura's reactions just #so good. it almost makes me glad they are all now on the edge like ofc raishan is strongest them all of them #but GOD the way she compells with what percy asks of her? and powerful mages looking at vm and waiting for their guide? A+ SCENE #im so. so excited to see this animated right after percy kisses vex you don't understand me. #he said fuck it I don't fear anything anymore and FUCKING WENT FOR IT #he really is my most special boy. i want to pick his brain and study him. #insane little guy feeding into my insane little mind👍 cool. #kelly says #critical role #critical role spoilers #just in case anyone stumble upon it but I doubt anyone is more later than I am #still putting it here just in case. #dl #also edit: for what's worth i love the messy plan they came up with. it is genuinely the best they can do rn and also i wholeheartedly #with travis lol if they have time they SHOULD go to the fire plan and kill raishan after killing thordak but anyway. lets see how it goes . #also sorry for so much cr blogging tonight... its percy's fault mostly. #ill tone it down its just first week of vacation i had it in me to watch a ton of cr and i didnt expected percahlia to happen #anyway... my beloveds.

[jellybeanium124]

so I was talking with another friend about season 2 and she was like "yeah I watched the first couple of episodes but I couldn't get into it" and I was like "oh why didn't you like it?" and she said "it was too wholesome" and I said "the first couple episodes of season 2 were too wholesome??" and she was like "yeah I don't care about those men's feelings!" and I was like "yeah well I guess if you don't care about their feelings you wouldn't find it interesting!"

#also my other friend who I was watching the show with clocked that the clocks were bombs immediately #when they went off I was like 'I can't believe you clocked that immediately' and they were like 'lol... clocked it' #another genius pun moment from me lmaooo #ofmd

[puthyflapps]

That unrequited au’s got me in a gotdang chokehold. Not the sweatshirt! 😭 The description of Regan vs. Shelbyyy help. Wake up Toni baby wake uppp!

If I have to be in my emotional devastation era then so does everyone else x

Toni has no choice but to wake up when this whole situation finally comes to a head during a drunken confrontation at one of Fatin's notorious house parties. Shelby had spent another evening going out of her way to avoid Toni and, subsequently, Regan. Her evasive behavior, combined with Toni’s penchant for picking fights, had culminated in this late-night showdown of sorts.

The two find themselves sharing hard stares and even harsher words. Questions seem to morph into accusations that are a clear result of the last name Shelby bears and the god-fearing reputation that comes with it. Truthfully, it was naive of Shelby to think she could continue to get away with dodging the other girl like this, and it was wholly and entirely ignorant to believe she could survive the ensuing interrogation. Especially knowing how Toni’s always prided herself on her ability to easily get under her skin. Steady cracks begin to appear in her veneer as Toni throws shot after shot her way. Launching question after question at her. Creating a dangerous minefield that Shelby’s not entirely sure she can continue to navigate much longer.

With each passing moment, Shelby can feel the heavy weight of her pageant queen mask slipping further and further down, revealing the raw and vulnerable truth underneath. Slowly, the carefully crafted facade of perfection cracks and crumbles, giving way to the messy and embarrassing reality she's been so desperately trying to hide. 

"Why is it so fucking hard for you to be happy for us?"

Toni lobs the question her way in a fit of frustration, and God, the question stings. It feels as though the words themselves have reached out and slapped her with all their might. Every syllable of every word burns at a brutal temperature. Invisible blisters are already steadily forming across the expanse of her cheek. Bubbling painfully. Flesh sizzling silently.

The question hurts. The insinuation hurts. The idea that Toni believes Shelby cares so little for her happiness fucking hurts. However, it’s still not enough to make her admit the truth and she can tell her silence is only upsetting Toni more. Her jaw is clenched and her chest is rising and falling rapidly with heavy breaths. It’s unsurprising when she yells out at Shelby once more:

“Say something!”

Her voice is desperate, trembling with fear and heartache. Shelby can hear the pleading in Toni's tone, her words spilling out with an urgency that cuts deep into Shelby's soul. She can feel the weight of Toni's expectations pressing down on her, begging for an explanation, for any shred of hope that this isn't what she thinks it is. The tension between them is palpable as Shelby struggles to hold back a flood of emotions threatening to overwhelm her. But with each passing moment, it becomes harder to contain the torrent of feelings churning within her.

“Because I love you!”

The declaration fills up the space around them, leaving no room to move. There is nowhere to run; nowhere to escape from the rubble of this crumbling friendship. It’s finally out there. These words, this thing that she's been so petrified to speak of is now out there for Toni to see, to dissect and pick apart. Shelby's soul lay bare in the confines of a bedroom that belonged to neither of them.

With a harsh swipe, Shelby banishes the hot tears carving tracks down her youthful face. She swivels abruptly from Toni, the air cooling where their bodies were once in proximity. Exhaustion-wrought legs buckle under her as she slumps onto the bed; an unruly cocktail of alcohol and fatigue renders her form heavy and unyielding. As she releases a shaky sigh permeating with undertones of regret - it sounds like waves reluctantly crashing onto a deserted beach. Gathering herself, she starts to explain:

"I spent years praying that one day you would wake up and just see me. You would see that I'm here, I've always been here, and you would finally love me back."

"Bee..." Toni's voice cracks. Raw with emotion and tinged with confusion.

Shelby pays no mind to the interruption, however. Instead, she presses on, ignoring how intensely pity-filled brown eyes watch her.

"I know how stupid and pathetic that sounds, but I really thought," her voice trails off momentarily as she tries to swallow the lump in her throat. "There were these moments where I swear it seemed like…like maybe you did love me. Then you met Regan, and I saw the way you looked at her, Toni. I saw it-"

"Shelby, please," Toni begs.

She pleads, for what? Shelby isn't sure. Does the thought of Shelby being in love with her make her skin crawl? Is Toni so disgusted that she can't bear to hear any more about Shelby's sick feelings? Perhaps she wants Shelby to stop, to save herself the embarrassment. Maybe she's simply trying to help Shelby retain what little is left of her dignity.

But Goodkinds aren’t known for being quitters.

So, if she's going to ruin the one good thing in her life and make a complete fool of herself, she may as well go for broke.

"It became painfully obvious that you would never love me the way that I love you. So, I'm sorry if I upset you. I'm sorry that I've been distant and closed off lately, but I am trying my best to learn how to not love you."

Toni's heart feels like it's being mercilessly wrenched from her chest, each beat causing a physical ache that seems to radiate through every limb. She knows she should say something, anything, to make things right, but her mind is foggy, and her tongue feels heavy with the weight of unspoken words. She can feel her knees growing weak with each passing moment. A tightness grips her throat, almost suffocating as a lump forms, making it difficult for her to even breathe. Despite the tears brimming in her eyes, she keeps them locked away; too ashamed to let them fall in front of her best friend.

Trudging forward, each step feeling more burdensome than the last, Toni makes her way over to the bed. Her eyes are transfixed on Shelby's form, as though she's just now seeing her for the first time. The air in the room is charged and tense, thick with unspoken emotions. "Bee," Toni says gently, barely above a whisper, only making Shelby want to hide away from her even more. She buries her head in her hands, unable to handle the softness in the brunette's tone. It feels too delicate, too careful, as if Toni is handling a fragile piece of glass that may shatter at any moment. Shelby's breaths come out in short ragged bursts, her head feeling light and dizzy as if the room is spinning around her. She feels exposed in all the wrong ways. Suddenly, there is a dip on the bed beside her and strong arms snake around her form. In this moment of vulnerability, Shelby can't help but lash out in the most pathetic way she can muster up - pushing weakly against Toni's chest like a petulant child. But Toni persists, ignoring Shelby's halfhearted protest and simply tightening her hold until they meld into one another. Shelby can feel puffs of warm breath tickling her ear as Toni whispers over and over again, "I didn't know." 

For what felt like hours, Toni and Shelby remained tangled together like the branches of an old tree. The soft pads of Toni's fingers traced soothing patterns over the expanse of Shelby's back as sobs wracked her body. Two girls, once inseparable, now finding solace in each other's arms amidst the ruins of their friendship. The aftermath of drunken confessions hung heavy in the air between them. As sleep slowly overtook her, Shelby couldn't help but wonder how they had ended up here - lost in each other yet worlds apart. When she wakes the following morning, she knows she can't linger a moment longer. She can't bear to face the harsh light of day and another inevitable rejection from Toni. With a heavy heart, she carefully untangles herself from the sleeping girl and mourns the thought that this will be the first and last time she ever shares a bed with Toni Shalifoe. 

#if puthy flapps ever cracked out a third installment of this highly unanticipated story/thot/idea i think it would be mainly Toni's pov the #morning after when she realizes shelby left and that she was a fucking idiot for not jumping at the chance to explain to shelby that she is #in fact in love with her she was just being an idiot who couldn't believe what she was hearing and who was overwhelmed bc pretty girl #unrequited love au #you see what i did there with the whole reference to s1 shoni and the 'i see you' moment from ep 4? am i a literary genius? perhaps #we really really really don't need to talk about the fact that this has been sitting in my drafts for five years just waiting to be posted #me reading about shelby getting her heart broken: i h8 it! i cant handle seeing my baby down and out like this!! author ur going to hell!!! #me writing the most painful and gut wrenching moments that leave shelby in nothing but pain and anguish: mmm mmm mmm this is delicious!! #ask #shoni #shelby x toni #shelby goodkind #toni shalifoe #the wilds

[marcusagrippa]

becoming more invested in one random side character who is fucking dead by the time my main plot starts than the actual protagonist is just a rite of passage for my writing process at this point

#big oc ramblingin the tags warning u h. #save me melisadd...... isa............ #a horrible ugly name for a horrible ugly guy #however. every lover is a soldier. etc etc. #yes he gets killed because of his own ambition but he also gets killed because of his devotion to his city. and by extension his paradoxica #devotion to rhys (who has become the city itself in a weird parasitic sort of way). he hates what rhys stands for and he hates his idealism #and his tyranny andsuch but they have such a fucked up (literally) cannibalistic relationship going back to faustus and the ivy war #that neither of them can function without the other. rhys' fate is sealed the moment he kills isa because theres no-one left to balance him #out and challenge his plans. and he spirals from this genius up-and-coming ruthless commander willing to do anything to keep his home safe #into a lazy power-hungry beast relying on the prestige of his ancestors and the fear of the people to keep him fed. and he misses isa #as much as he hates to admit it #and he misses argent and he misses what they all had and as he gets older he starts losing the ability to distinguish between the past and #the present. hence the public display of argent's innards and isa's rotting corpse being dug up and given a seat at the table at the feast. #but back to isa. isa doesn't want to fight rhys - he believes there's good in him up until the last second of his life. #his execution is the death of any hope of redemption rhys might have had. #noneof that makes sense but anyway you get what im trying to say right #<- what a late republic hyperfix does to a mf #they are based loosely on the first triumvirate and should all eat each other !! #i can make my own narrative ghosts god dammit #dyrposts #r. a. bicinius #m. f. voscium #i made these guys like. two days ago??? but i cant stop thinking about them #if anyone is interested. i will say more things about dr #writing #augh #rhys isnt technically a main character either feel like i should clarify that he. dies in the first chapter #story focuses on eos furi and gabier !!! yippee !!! #jase writes #FUTURE ME EDIT: THIS IS ALL WILDLY OUTDATED :DDDDD OH WELL

[spaghett-onaplate]

I'm so sick of booktok books. Tropes sticky-taped together to make a semi-comprehensible and mildly enjoyable at best story. 2D characters that have no real defining personalities beyond banter and witty one-liners, that have no clear motivations or goals, that are inconsistent in their actions and thoughts. A lack of description that has you rereading passages over and over in a lackluster attempt to understand wtf is going on.

I'm reviewing this book for a bookstore magazine, and that fucking thing is the inspiration behind this. I mean, it has "TikTok" on the front cover, so I was a little sceptical at first, but now I'm just pissed off. Apart from what I've already mentioned, there are severe plot holes - the entire plot of the book is centred around a journey to recover a magical item of legends. Both of the main characters are sceptical of its existence, but they decide to try and find it anyway. Personally, I think it could have been executed much better if one of the characters believed in it fully and wholeheartedly, and was dead set on his goal to get it. Then, that would have allowed leeway for some scepticism in other characters while still moving the plot ahead, and added more depth to the otherwise bland characters. It also would have tied in very well with the backstory and just made so much more sense plot-wise.

I don't know, it's just really pissing me off. I probably wouldn't be able to finish this book if it weren't for the fact I'm writing a review, but it pains me to think of the fact I'll have to write a mostly positive review - so I'll do what I'm best at, and compliment the (few) enjoyable aspects while backhandedly complimenting the rest. I'll keep it honest, but if I didn't have a word limit/positive theme I would write a scathing review of 5k words, at bare minimum. There are so many points where I have to flip a few pages back and ask myself if I missed something - not that there's much to miss.

The two main characters are both cardboard cutouts with inconsistent goals and thoughts. One of the central conflicts between them makes next to no sense. The other two side characters are yawn-inducing and essentially useless, and I often forget they're even there. The lore of the world is bleak and two-dimensional. The writing style reminds me of The Hunger Games with its short and direct sentences, but is executed so poorly that I hesitate to compare it to, you know, The Hunger Games. It works in that series with Katniss' thought process and character, but here it just makes me cringe. It gives off the effect of trying to put emphasis on sentences that really don't deserve it. I think some books can pull that writing style off really well, when paired with other sentence structures, but in this book it just comes across as lazy and, well, badly written.

Writing a book is still an impressive feat, and the author could have done much worse. So I'll still write a kind review, but I'll keep it honest and I won't be happy about it.

Anyway, just needed to get that out of my system so that I can write a mostly positive review. But I'm just sick of what is essentially the Marvel-ification of a lot of recent YA books. I've seen other posts discussing this so I'm glad I'm not alone. And either way, bad books have always existed - it's not a recent phenomenon. Good books exist, bad books exist, and unfortunately it's a lot easier to find the latter.

#aaah i feel a weight has been lifted from my chest #I'm not naming the book because it's not even published yet 💀 #i have a proof copy which is the only cool thing about this entire situation #but if you're curious to know what book dm me‚ if you want #anyway yeah‚ just had to rant about this literary nightmare for a moment because i have a hundred pages left #and at this point I'd rather drag my knees across concrete 🙃 #I kept holding onto hope that the book would improve but even if it surprises me in the last few chapters with a sudden genius breakthrough #- which i heavily doubt - #that won't excuse it for its other sins #booktok #books

[nostalgia-tblr]

me: time to sleep for a bit

my brain: hey. hey, you know that fic you're writing?

me: shh, brain, not now.

my brain: right, so, that scene you were stuck on

me: LATER, BRAIN

my brain: i've thought of a way to make it angstier

me: ...damn

#and then i got up and typed out the basics so i didn't forget #and THEN i had my nap #if it's just a line or two i have paper and pencil by the bed because THE BRAIN DOES THIS A LOT #but this time it was an entire conversation and i couldn't keep up #although it does mean that The AU is getting another chapter with the “Porn; Porn; ANGST” structure #that's a bit repetitive isn't it? does it feel like it's got repetitive? #they didn't bang in chapter 3 so at least i broke the mould there. what a genius i am. how groundbreaking of me. #the sylki au that got longer and wronger #but hey i only have 4 WIP files open on the PC at the moment this is a vast improvement from last week! #fic related

[bumblingbabooshka]

Tuvok dad Moments in Pathways

Bonus: Tuvok being absolutely shocked that he wasn’t a perfect angel when he was a child...I can’t believe these lies would be spread about Tuvok [Redacted], the world’s most perfect boy then man...

#this is not my Varith characterization but I love love love seeing any interpretation of Tuvok's kids so I am FEASTING on it #'close your mouth' I got THROWN back in time to my mom saying that to ME!!! #I love reading the preview bits of these novels and picking out the parts I like and throwing out the parts I don't without a second thought #I don't know who M'Fau is bc of said reading technique (A grandmother maybe?) but I love her ... she called his ass out HEHEHEHE #also does Tuvok's fam ily have...a c ook??? pampered boy for REAL #Oh M'Fau seems to be some sort of religious leader~! #Tuvok's mom rings a bell to brought breakfast...TUVOK??? RICH BOY??? #Honestly I already knew this based on vibes and the fact he had a Vulcan master giving him private kal-toh lessons #I want Tuvok to drop little hints of this background while on voyager to which everyone's like f uckyou....you had a COOK as a child???? #In this novel he says 'Terra is a barbarous place' Hhehe he's like mom d ad PLEASE don't send me to Starfleet!!! #I don't like the light misogny the author seems to be sprinkling in here and I will be filtering it out in real time as I skim through #an oh so delicate smattering of misogny -chefs kiss and then I spit on the floor- #There is a funny moment where a girl tries to make out with him and he picks her up under her arms and puts her on the ground and is like #uhh thank you...for teaching me geometry. You should be like...a teacher or something. Bye. <- while backing away from her #also a cute moment where he has a little crush on a girl is like 'what isthis?? it's like curiosity but tenfold...should I quell it or can I #act on this curiosity??' <- He wants a good girl who go to church...nREADSER Vulcan Tombs or whatever #TOMES #Tuvok marveling at his daughter is so cute...he SO thinks she's a special little geniu <3 #SUCH a dad...he 1000% is like my kids are better than your kids (lowkey...but also in a very very high key) #novel experiences #<- tag for these posts #M'Fau: Tuvok. You were NOT a perfect little angel as a child. #Tuvok: (TIK TOK BOOM SOUND EFFECT) .....????