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jaskierswolf · 3 years

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Weight on My Shoulders

A very self-indulgent prequel to my not so kinky soulmate AU (Tumblr/AO3).

Any references to events or messages involving my own darling soulmate @geraltrogerericduhautebellegarde is purely coincidental. I promise we are much more needy than this.

Ship: Geraskier (pre-romantic)

CW: Far too much pining, mentions of anxiety, long distance friendships

_____

Jaskier pouted as he wrapped himself up in his weighted blanket and duvet. Even with the additional weight he was struggling to sleep properly, but it did help. What would really help was a hug from his soulmate, but that was off the table. Geralt was a bazillion lightyears away, all the way in America, and Jaskier was stuck in miserable, grey England. They’d been talking online for two years, and the distance wasn’t getting any easier. If anything it was getting worse, and Jaskier wasn’t sure how much more he could take of it.

“Jask, you’re falling asleep, love,” Geralt hummed from the too bright screen that was lighting up his room. “Go to bed.”

“I’m in bed,” Jaskier huffed.

“Go to sleep, we can talk more in the morning.”

Jaskier whined, sinking further into his blanket burrito. “But I have work again tomorrow, I don’t want to sleep. I want to talk to you. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Geralt sighed, smiling warmly at him through the screen, “But I will be here when you wake, I promise.”

“I’d rather you be here with me.”

It was pathetic. Jaskier knew it was pathetic, but he just felt a warmth in his chest, a ghost of Geralt’s arms around him.

“I’m always here” Geralt hummed in his mind.

Jaskier leaned into Geralt’s mental embrace, letting himself soak in the glow of his soulmate’s warmth. He was struggling to keep his eyes open which didn’t really matter but he only had a few hours each day to video call his soulmate and he hated wasting any of them. It had been worse the last few days. Essi and Pris had announced they were going to honeymoon in New York, and whilst they wouldn’t see Geralt, they would be a whole lot closer than Jaskier had ever been. He’d even considered asking to tag along in their suitcases so he could afford the trip to the States.

He just missed Geralt so fucking much.

“I love you,” he mumbled again, wiping the tears from his eyes that he hadn’t even realised had formed. “I love you more than Dandelion.”

He tried to laugh but it sounded weak to his own ears. Dandelion was a musician, just like he was hoping to be, a beautiful tall elegant man with gorgeous long blond curls, and a laugh that could outshine a thousand suns. He was also Jaskier’s celebrity crush and inspiration. Jaskier had been obsessed since he was sixteen, secretly hoping that Dandelion was his soulmate. Not much had changed since meeting Geralt in his dreams. He was still completely obsessed with the musician, only his daydreams tended to include Geralt as well, a fact that his soulmate thankfully found endearing.

“Wow,” Geralt chuckled, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “That’s high praise.”

“It’s true! I would renounce my love of Dandelion for mere seconds in your arms,” Jaskier insisted, “and then I would never let you go and you’d be stuck with me.”

“It would be hard to work with a Jaskier in my arms.”

Jaskier scoffed, rubbing his eyes. “You’ll manage.”

“Sleep, Jask,” Geralt’s words were a low hum, added weight to his blanket and Jaskier could feel himself slipping. He supposed it was only a matter of time really, it was nearly midnight and Jaskier had to get up at an ungodly hour for work. “For me.”

And really that was just unfair. Geralt knew that Jaskier would do anything for him. He was just that desperate for attention, although despite his slightly less dramatic personality, Geralt could be equally needy, if you knew how to read him.

“That’s cheating,” Jaskier whined.

“I never said I play fair.”

“Betrayed by my own soulmate,” Jaskier pouted as Geralt hung up the call and his tiny little bedroom fell into darkness. Without the light of his phone, Jaskier was fighting a losing battle. “I love you, dear heart.”

“I love you too, a lot. Too much.”

Jaskier scoffed, turning to hug his pillow. “Never too much, never enough. Goodnight, my love”

“Night, Jask.”

_______

When he awoke the next morning, Jaskier had a notification on his phone. It wasn’t unusual. Geralt often left him little messages, pictures of Roach, or things that had reminded him of Jaskier throughout the day. Sometimes, if Jaskier was lucky, Geralt would leave him gifs of Dandelion, and on even rarer occasions, awkward selfies that were never flattering despite Geralt’s godlike appearance. Jaskier treasured every single one. But no, that morning he had a more unusual notification.

It was from Lambert.

They’d talked a couple of times, mostly in a group chat whenever Geralt wanted to include Jaskier on family film night or playing games online, which Jaskier was shockingly terrible at, especially the shooting games the boys preferred. Lambert had never DM’d Jaskier before though. There had never been an occasion to, so why bother?

So Jaskier was feeling more than a little anxious about clicking on the message.

“Geralt?” he tested, although he was pretty positive that his soulmate was asleep. Geralt would usually at least say good morning when he was awake, but there had been nothing but silence through their soulbond.

It came as no surprise when Geralt didn’t answer.

His phone buzzed again in his hand, another message from Lambert.

“Bollocks,” Jaskier groaned, sitting up in bed so he could find his glasses. They were buried under his blanket and looking a little bent out of shape but that was nothing new.

L - Guess who’s coming to England on a business trip!

Jaskier’s heart jumped and hope soared through his body, a flutter of wings in his chest as his pulse raced, only to be destroyed in the next second.

L - It’s not Geralt, shit. I should have started with that.

- It’s me.

- I’m coming to England. Found out this morning. All expenses paid. - I’ll be in London for a week, if you want to meet up?

Jaskier stared at his phone. He was excited, of course he was but he couldn’t help the ache in his heart. His friend was coming to England. Geralt’s family was coming to England. That was one step closer to meeting his soulmate in person, but it wasn’t far enough. He felt like shit. Guilt tore through him. Lambert was clearly excited about his news and yet all Jaskier could think of was how he wasn’t Geralt.

Maybe he could give Lambert something to take back to Geralt. They’d sent letters and parcels back and forth but it would be different like this, and he should be excited. He should be over the fucking moon.

And truth be told, if he hadn’t felt so incredibly needy already he probably would have been more excited, but his heart was feeling fragile. Jaskier had spent the last week or so wondering if Geralt loved him back in a romantic way, or whether they would just be the dearest of friends. Whatever it was, Jaskier would be fine. That’s how soulbonds worked. They would be perfect for one another, platonically or romantically but Jaskier fell hard and fast.

Surely Geralt would love him back in the same way, right?

Jaskier was too afraid to ask at this point. He just kept saying “I love you” and hoping that Geralt would hear the truth. Neither of them had spoken about dating other people, but Jaskier knew there was no hope for him. Perhaps the odd fling, but he’d tried that once and without the connection he had with Geralt, he just wasn’t really into it.

He sighed dramatically and picked up his phone.

J - That’s fucking brilliant!!

He added a stream of emojis for good luck.

J - and all expenses paid for?! Drinks are on you, darling x

L - You should be so lucky.

- Pay for your own drink you cheapskate.

Jaskier squinted at the screen, pushing his fringe from his face. His tongue flicked out to lick his lips, and he ignored the dryness in his throat. Logically, he knew he should get up and get some water but his bed was comfy and he didn’t quite want to face the day yet, especially as Geralt was asleep. Things just felt heavier when Geralt was asleep.

He sighed again and tapped out a message.

J - Can you sneak Geralt in your suitcase?

- I’ll pay for the luggage fee <3

Lambert started typing immediately and Jaskier waited with bated breath. It had been a joke but there was always a chance that Lambert would be allowed a plus one… right?

L - I’m afraid not

- I’m sorry. I know you want to meet.

- Geralt is just as upset. The bastard hasn’t spoken to me all day.

Jaskier couldn’t help but laugh at that. He’d sensed something had been bothering his soulmate, especially when Geralt was the one to insist they video-called before Jaskier went to bed, but it was nice to hear that he wasn’t the only one being pathetic and unreasonably grumpy. Sometimes it felt like Jaskier felt everything and Geralt was just putting up with him because he didn’t have much choice. In his heart, Jaskier knew that wasn’t true, that Geralt just showed his love in a more sedate manner.

Opposites really do attract.

He sighed and switched chats, typing out a quick message to his soulmate.

J - I miss you. I love you. I will be unbearably needy today. Sorry!

Flipping his phone to the camera app, Jaskier snapped a quick selfie. He looked like a mess of stubble, glasses and ratty hair… but Geralt never seemed to mind.

J - Isn’t your soulmate the best?

- Love me?

- I love you

- I already said that but it’s true.

Jaskier cursed and threw his phone onto the end of the bed before remembering that he hadn’t answered Lambert yet. He pouted and scrambled to find his phone again, struggling against the weight of his blanket. The blanket did wonders for his ADHD but it could be a pain in the arse to move sometimes. Reluctantly, he switched back to Lambert’s chat.

J - I can’t wait to show you around! Ooh we could go to the natural history museum, I’m sure some of the stuffed animals look just like you! Or maybe a show!

L - Not sure how much I’’ll be able to hang out, but we’ll have to get a photo to show Geralt.

- He’ll probably be jealous.

- But he’ll manage.

Jaskier rolled his eyes. Siblings could be the worst. He’d never really gotten on well with his own sisters but he could imagine having Lambert for a brother would be a hundred times worse. Still, he smiled at his phone. Geralt would be jealous. Geralt wanted to meet him. That was a good thing, no matter how much Jaskier pined to see his soulmate over Lambert.

This was a start.

One day.

They would meet one day, and then Jaskier would never have to let him go. He just had to be patient… for now.

#the witcher #geraskier #soulmates #geralt of rivia #jaskier pankratz #lambert #wolfie's witcher writing

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debbiechanclub · 4 years

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Best Two Out of Three, Part 13

Did I scare y’all making you wait nearly a week for this part? Truth be told, I STRUGGLED with this you guys. I got in my own head about it and then once I figured it out Tumblr decided to be a total dick and not save my work... but phew. It’s here! HUGE shout-out to my co-writer @what-does-mine-say for writing the final scene for this DAYS ago, because otherwise this part still wouldn’t be done. Please go give her a follow if you haven’t already.

Also I’m still kind of in my head about this part so I hope you all like it k bye.

Best Two Out of Three

Part: 13/26

Pairing: Kenny Omega x OFC x Cash Wheeler and Adam Page x OFC

Warnings: ANGST, language, alcohol use

Word Count: 3.8k

Catch up on previous parts here.

Alex rolled over, half-asleep, and reached out for Cash—but she didn’t find him. She opened her eyes. He wasn’t there. The covers of the bed were flung back, the sheet and pillow wrinkled from where he’d been. But before she could wonder where he’d gone, the smell of coffee hit her nose.

She swung her feet to the floor and climbed out of bed, padding down the hall of Cash’s house in nothing but her underwear and one of his t-shirts. She found him in the kitchen making breakfast. Her smile nearly split her face in two.

“Are you making me pancakes?”

He glanced over his shoulder. “No, go back to bed! I was trying to surprise you!”

Alex’s heart nearly exploded when she heard that. “Babe! Really?” She wrapped her arms around his waist from behind and placed a kiss on his bare shoulder. “You did surprise me.”

“Yeah?”

She nodded.

“Good.” He turned around in her grip and pulled her close. “I wanted to do something nice for you to make up for Wednesday.”

Alex smiled. “Trust me, you’ve more than made up for it.” She reached up and gently stroked her fingers along the nape of his neck, playing with his hair like she had that night in front of the fire. He hummed as closed his eyes.

“Come on, you know what that does to me,” he breathed.

“I know,” she teased. “That’s why I’m doing it.”

“Mm.” He bent his head forward and hungrily kissed her neck. Alex bit back a giggle as his beard tickled her, and then a moan when he nipped her skin; but the pancakes suddenly started to sizzle on the griddle.

“I think the pancakes are burning,” she said.

“Shit!” Cash whirled around and quickly flipped them with the spatula. “See, you’re a distraction,” he smirked at her. “Maybe it’s a good thing I won’t be at Dynamite this week. You’d get me in even more trouble.”

Alex frowned when he said that. “Don’t remind me you won’t be there this week,” she muttered.

After the “beer dumping incident,” as they’d come to call it, Cody had individually called both Cash and Dax and told them they wouldn’t be on either Dynamite or Dark that upcoming week. As soon as Cash had told Alex the news, she’d decided to fly back down to Florida early and spend the next few days at his place in Orlando; she didn’t want to go that long without seeing him. And, ironically, Cash seemed to be taking the whole thing better than she was.

“It is what it is,” he said with a shrug. “Kenny’s just flexing his EVP muscle ‘cause he’s mad I got the girl.”

He sent her a crooked grin. She returned it with an unamused stare. “Cash…” she warned.

“I know, I know,” he relented. “You don’t want me to rub salt in a wound. But tell me I’m wrong.”

Alex bit her lip, trying hard not to smile. It was sexy how cocky he was being—and he knew it.

He turned off the burner and took her by the hips, pulling her into him. His voice came out breathy as he spoke in between kisses on her neck. “Kenny’s mad because he knows you’re in my bed”—kiss—“in my shirt”—kiss—“grabbing my hair and saying my name.”

He squeezed her ass, and Alex let out a whimper of pleasure. But she didn’t want to give into him that easily. “You’re gonna have to make waffles too if you don’t stop.”

He smiled against her skin. “Oh, really?”

“Mhm. With chocolate chips.”

“Well we’re gonna have to work up an appetite, then.”

She let out a surprised yelp as he picked her up, hoisted her over his shoulder, and carried her back to the bedroom. And that time, Alex was more than willing to give in. The pancakes could wait.

* * * * * * * * * *

If there was anywhere Kenny didn’t want to be right now, it was in Jacksonville at Daily’s Place. He had half a mind to just get up and leave; he didn’t even have a match that week. But he couldn’t leave. He was an EVP; he had responsibilities. But even so, he was just going through the motions. He had been for weeks. And every week, he was finding it harder and harder to care.

His apathy had started to become obvious to his colleagues, and especially to his friends. Thankfully, Matt and Nick didn’t push him or ask any questions—not after he’d let slip that he was in love with Alex. Kenny was almost certain they pitied him. Why wouldn’t they? He had to see the woman he loved with another man every single fucking week.

But Kenny didn’t pity himself; he was angry with himself. Angry for not fighting harder for Alex. But, then again, she hadn’t really given him a chance. She’d turned tail and run to Cash after one bad day even though he’d told her he wanted to change for her. Those weren’t just words—he’d meant it with his entire being. But Alex hadn’t given him a chance to prove it. And over the last few weeks, Kenny had started to wonder how much of that was her own decision… and how much of it was outside influence.

The door to the locker room opened; Kenny tried not to roll his eyes when Adam walked in. Speaking of outside influence.

“Hey,” Adam said. He looked confused to see him there. “Have you just been sitting in here by yourself?”

Kenny’s answer was clipped. “Yeah.”

Adam blinked. “Okay.” He moved over to his bag and pulled out his wrist tape. It seemed like there was something else he wanted to say but wasn’t sure if he should. It irked Kenny.

“What?” he shot. “Is there somewhere I should be?”

Adam’s eyebrows arched as he started wrapping the black tape around his wrists. “No; you can do whatever the fuck you want. But you’re usually in production during the show so I was surprised to see you here.”

Kenny didn’t say anything in return. But then Adam spoke up again.

“There is something you should do, though,” he started. “You should talk to Alex.”

At first, Kenny thought he was joking. But the look on Adam’s face communicated that he was dead serious. It angered him. He couldn’t believe Adam of all people would suggest that. “Why would I talk to Alex?”

“Because she thinks it was your call to keep FTR off TV this week,” Adam returned. “She thinks you’re being petty about what happened with the beer. You should go tell her it was Tony’s decision.”

Kenny bit down on his jaw. He’d had a feeling Alex might think he was the reason FTR didn’t have a match this week. But that was none of Adam’s business. “Oh, so now you want to try to patch things up between me and Alex? What’s changed?”

Adam paused what he was doing to glare at him. “I just figured you’d want her to know the truth.”

“Oh, is that what it is?” Kenny charged. “You sure it’s not because you’re feeling guilty about something?”

Anger flashed across Adam’s face. But if he had anything to say, he left it unsaid. He used his teeth to rip off the tape from the roll and tossed it back into his bag. “Whatever, I don’t have time for this. My match is next.” He stood and crossed the room; but before he left, he looked back over his shoulder. “Alex is in the lounge with Callie. Man up and talk to her.”

He exited before Kenny could say anything in response. It was a good thing, too, because Kenny had nothing nice to say. Who the hell did he think he was, telling him to man up? When was he going to “man up” and admit that he’d invited Cash to that cookout on purpose?

He sat there for a while, stewing in his own anger. And, eventually, it got to the point where he couldn’t just sit there anymore. He pushed himself off the couch and went out the door, moving purposefully toward the lounge. Alex was sitting with Callie and Best Friends in front of the TV watching Adam’s match against Five from Dark Order. They all stared at him when he walked in.

“Can I talk to you?” he said to Alex.

She hesitated. But eventually she said, “Sure.”

He didn’t wait for her to get up before he turned and walked back out into the hall. He moved a few feet from the door to give them some privacy. When he turned back around, Alex was staring up at him with those big hazel eyes of hers, anxiety written all over her face. Kenny hated it. He hated that that was what he did to her now. He wanted to fix it.

He let out a breath. “I just wanted to tell you that it wasn’t my call to keep FTR off TV this week. It was Tony’s.”

She seemed surprised to hear that. “Oh. Well… did Tony talk to you about it?”

He shook his head. “No. Not until after. I mean, he hadn’t told them yet, but… he’d already made up his mind.” He paused. “I just didn’t want you to think I was trying to… I don’t know. Undercut FTR. Or you.”

Alex looked away, and for a second Kenny worried that she wouldn’t believe him or find another way to make his fault. But then she looked back up at him and said, “To be honest, that was what I thought you were trying to do. So thank you for telling me.”

Relief flooded him. That was all he’d needed to hear. “Sure,” he said. He started to walk away—but Alex put a hand on his arm. He looked back at her. Her eyes were full of remorse.

“For what it’s worth, I wasn’t okay with what they did last week. But I’ve been wracking my brain ever since it happened and… why did you go out there? Were you honestly going to have a drink with them?”

Kenny’s face fell. “Honestly? No. I went out there to hit Cash with the cooler. But I thought better of it as soon as I got to the ring. I don’t know,” he shrugged and looked away. “I figured I shouldn’t do anything to push you away any further.”

That was the truth. He hadn’t wanted to make amends with Cash last week—he’d wanted to hit him right in his stupid face with that fucking cooler. But Alex had already rejected him. He didn’t want to make her hate him, too.

“You didn’t push me away, Kenny.”

He looked back at her. She was frowning. It confused him. “Well then what the hell happened, Alex? Because I have no idea.”

She couldn’t look him in the eye as she answered. “I told you. I was afraid things would just be the same as last time.”

“And I told you I wanted to change for you!” he returned. “Those weren’t just words, Alex! I meant it! And I would’ve proven it to you if you’d just given me the chance!”

He’d tried his best to keep his voice down, but he couldn’t help it. He was so fucking frustrated with the situation. But when he saw the look on her face, he wished he could un-say all of it. She looked like she was on the verge of tears.

He let out an apologetic breath. “Alex… I’m sorry. I just—”

“Is there something wrong here?” Trent suddenly asked. He and Chuck had both come out of the lounge and were walking toward them now, hard looks on their faces. Kenny rolled his eyes.

“Please, we’re having a private conversation,” he breathed.

“That’s not what it sounds like,” Chuck returned.

It was Alex who let out a noise of frustration that time. “Guys, don’t,” she said to them. “We’re fine.”

Trent gave her a look. “Are you sure?”

She started to answer—but Kenny cut her off. “Trent, why don’t you mind your own business for once?”

His brow lowered. “Are you serious? We could hear you in there yelling at her.”

“Please, just stop,” Alex pleaded; but Kenny spoke over her.

“I wasn’t yelling at her.”

“Well it didn’t sound like you were having a conversation, that’s for damn sure,” Trent said.

Kenny took a step forward—now was not the day to try him—but before anything could happen Callie came running frantically out into the hall. She looked at Kenny. “You need to go help your tag team partner—he’s getting mobbed by all of Dark Order out there.”

Kenny let out another sigh. Honestly, at the moment, he didn’t really care if Adam got his ass beat. But going to help him was better than staying here and dealing with Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum being overprotective of Alex. So he turned and begrudgingly took off toward the ring, going slower than he could have.

* * * * * * * * * *

Later that night, Dynamite and Dark had both wrapped and most of the roster had cleared out and gone back to the hotel; but Alex was still at the arena. Cash had called her right as she was about to leave and asked her how things had gone, and so she’d found the nearest private room and told him. She’d told him it had been Tony, not Kenny, who’d made the call to keep him and Dax off TV that week. She’d told him how things obviously weren’t okay between Kenny and Adam. They’d avoided each other the rest of the night after Kenny’s blasé attempt to help Adam fend off Dark Order.

But what she hadn’t told him was what Kenny had said to her, about how she hadn’t given him a chance to prove that he wanted to change for her. It wasn’t that Alex wanted to hide it from Cash; she just didn’t see any point in telling him. It would only make the situation more strained than it already was. And besides—Kenny wasn’t wrong. She hadn’t given him a chance to prove himself. And, truth be told, that was something she’d thought about a lot over the last six weeks. Struggled with, even.

But she did her best to put it out of her mind as she pulled her suitcase down the hall toward the exit. She was almost out the door when her phone rang again. She dug it out of her pocket; her brow furrowed in confusion when she Callie’s name on the caller ID. Nevertheless, she answered.

“Hello?”

“Hey! Please tell me you’re still at the arena.”

She sounded panicked. “Yeah…” Alex returned. “I was just about to leave. Why?”

“Oh, thank God,” Callie breathed a sigh of relief on the other end. “Could you do me a huge favor? I left my diamond studs on the ledge in the shower in the locker room. Could you get them for me? They were a gift from Adam. He would murder me if he knew I left them there, especially after all the shit that happened tonight.”

Alex smirked to herself. She knew a golden opportunity to mess with someone when she saw it. “Real diamond studs?” She tutted. “How unbelievably negligent of you, Callie. I don’t think Adam would appreciate you forgetting such an expensive and thoughtful gift.”

“Alex,” Callie started; but Alex wasn’t done.

“I’m sorry, but I have to tell him. I can text while you’re still on the line, you know. Hold on—”

“ALEX!” Callie frantically interjected. “You better be joking.”

“Calm down,” Alex assured. “Of course I’m joking. But you owe me.”

There was a pause. And then Callie offered, “I’ll buy you a bag of Sour Patch Kids.”

Alex rolled her eyes. “That’s Trent’s thing. You gotta find something else.”

Callie didn’t say anything in response.

“Headed to the locker room now,” Alex relented.

“Thank you!”

“Uh huh,” she returned, and she ended the call. Callie was legitimately lucky she’d started to like her.

She rolled her suitcase behind her as she made her way to The Elite’s locker room. As everyone else was gone, she didn’t think twice about walking right in without knocking—but she came to an abrupt halt just inside the doorway. Kenny sat sprawled on the couch, staring listlessly up at the ceiling—and there was a whiskey bottle in his hand.

He lifted his head off the back of the couch. He looked just as shocked to see her as she did him. “Alex.” He shifted to sit properly. “What’re you doing here?”

She didn’t answer his question. Instead, she asked, “Have you been drinking?”

There was an amount of concern in her voice that she hadn’t expected. But he shrugged. “Adam shouldn’t leave his liquor lying around.”

Alex was stunned. As far as she knew, Kenny had never had a drop of alcohol in his life. She rushed over and sat next to him. “How much have you had?”

“I don’t know,” he said as he set the bottle on the coffee table. “A few swigs.”

Alex looked into his eyes. She didn’t think he was drunk, but she could tell he was feeling it. She knew he was feeling it when he looked at her and smirked, “Even I can tell that’s the cheap shit.”

She ignored the comment. “Why are you drinking?”

He let out a tired breath. “A lot of reasons.” He leaned back again, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You. Adam. Me. Probably mostly me.”

Alex frowned. But before she could say anything, he spoke up again.

“I had a dream about you the other night. We were together. Fucking stupid, right?”

He laughed to himself. It stung her, and before she knew it she said, “It’s not stupid.”

He picked his head back up and looked at her. “Then why aren’t we together in real life?”

Alex opened her mouth and closed it again. She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t want to hurt him any more than she already had. She couldn’t, especially not when he was like this.

But Kenny wanted an answer. “That’s all I want to know, Alex.” He shifted so that he faced her, and his knee bumped against hers. “Just tell me why you picked him because I… I don’t know.”

He looked into her eyes, and Alex suddenly found herself fighting back tears, just like she had when his words had cut into her like a knife outside the lounge. She’d never seen Kenny look so defeated. And knowing she’d done it to him… it was more than she could bear.

Her voice came out choked. “I told you why when I talked to you at the hotel six weeks ago.”

“No,” he shook his head. “No, you didn’t.”

He brow furrowed. “Yes, I—”

“You didn’t, Alex,” he cut her off. His voice was so earnest that she couldn’t help but listen. “I’m sorry, but you didn’t. All you did six weeks ago was use Cash as an excuse to run away from giving me a real chance.”

If his words had cut her before, this time they stabbed her in the heart. He was right, and there was absolutely no denying it. Her eyes welled up and the tears rolled down her cheeks, unable to hold them back any longer. Kenny’s face fell.

“No, please don’t cry, baby.” He stopped short, realizing what he’d said. “Fuck. I’m sorry. It’s the whiskey, I guess.” He ran a hand over his face. “I should go.”

“No.” Alex reached out and touched his arm before he could get up off the couch. It surprised them both. But she genuinely didn’t want him to go. “You’re right. I did run away, and I didn’t give you a fair chance. But I was scared, Kenny.”

His brow furrowed. “Of what?”

“Of getting hurt again! I told you that! I was afraid if I fell for you again that I’d just get burned twice as bad!”

She drew in a breath, suddenly realizing what she’d just said. Kenny’s eyes widened. “If you fell for me again?”

Alex had to swallow a lump in her throat before she could answer. There was no point denying it any longer. “I was in love with you the first time, Kenny. But I just buried it and ignored it because I knew you didn’t feel the same.” She wiped away a tear and looked at the whiskey bottle, suddenly wanting to take a swig herself. And then she realized: Chuck had told her practically the same thing six weeks ago. Now she knew exactly how he’d felt with her. It only made it worse.

“Alex.”

She looked back at Kenny. He gazed into her eyes—and, somehow, she knew exactly what he was going to say.

“I’m in love with you. Present tense.”

It felt like all the air was knocked from Alex’s lungs. She stared back at him, her eyes glassy, lips parted in silent shock. “What?”

He held her gaze. “I’m in love with you,” he said again. “And I know it’s not fair to tell you now, but… I don’t want to leave it unsaid.”

Alex was at a total loss. She didn’t know what to do, what to say, what to even think. The only thing she did know was that he was telling the truth. It was written all over his face.

Her phone let out a loud sound, cutting through the silence and making her jump. She looked down at the screen. It was a text from Callie. Did you get them?

The earrings. Alex had forgotten all about them. “Shit, Callie’s earrings.”

Kenny gave her a confused look. “What?”

“Callie asked me to get her earrings that she left in the bathroom,” she said as she stood from the couch. “It’s why I came in here.” She practically jumped off the couch and hurried into the bathroom. Thankfully, the earrings were right where Callie had said they were. Alex grabbed them from the ledge in the shower and walked quickly back out into the main room. She looked at Kenny as she grabbed her bag. “Do you have a way back to the hotel?”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

They gazed at each other from across the room. Alex opened her mouth, wanting to say something, anything; but she was afraid that whatever she said say would come out all wrong. So she just gave him one last look and pushed out the door, running away from her feelings again.

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shestillhasherquill · 5 years

Text

At the Heart of Darkness (9/11)

Hello, hello! I almost forgot that today was Thursday - I started at a new job! Anyway, you don't care. Thank you for your continued interest in this fic. I love reading your tags. I appreciate all the support!!

Thank you Mods of @captainswanbigbang for being chill about a lot of stuff and for being so freaking organised.

@sambethe was so great throughout. Thank you, for the banner and the artwork for chapter 2 and chapter 5. And for being a third set of eyes on this fic! @downeystarkjr I still can't get over how great your videos are, both the teaser and the longer one. Please go to their tumblrs and check their hard work out!!

@accio-ambition, thank you for being so sweet and for finding the time to edit this despite how busy you were. Ily.

Also, special mention to @peglegsjones whose portrayal of the Dark One in her fic Alone, until I get home inspired me and the way I chose to write the Darkness.

omg we're almost at the end!!!!

Summary: Killian Jones lives in the Land without Magic, with no memories of his family. Until Emma Swan comes into his life like a whirlwind, reminding about everything he had lost. He embarks on an adventure to destroy the Darkness, only to discover that Emma might not be telling him the whole story.

Rating: M

Content Warning: Mentions of Miscarriage, Angst, Gothel (Please heed the Gothel warning, ugh God, she sucks)

Current Chapter: ao3 ff.net

Chapter 8: Don’t bother writing (I’m gone)

Present Day: Enchanted Forest

“What did Emma tell you again?” Killian asked, taking leaping steps just to keep pace with his daughter’s rapid steps.

“That the Dagger was with an old friend. There is only one person Mama would give it to,” Alice replied, trying to hurry as much as she could.

“Someone she trusted the most?” Killian guessed. But as far as he knew, Emma hardly trusted anybody, let alone enough to entrust his dagger to them.

“Nu-uh, that would be the first person anyone would torture. She gave it to Ariel, Queen of the Water Realms. She can travel between the realms anytime she wanted, and could make a quick getaway.”

Killian knew Ariel; they had been something like friends at some point, despite the animosity between pirates and mermaids. “Ah. She’s a nice lass. How are you going to contact her though?” he asked, his brows furrowed in confusion.

Alice huffed, stopping in her tracks, pulling a seashell necklace from around her neck. “Using this. I have already sent her message via shell. She should be waiting for us, we must hurry. Now, stop asking questions and follow me!”

Killian frowned, a reprimand ready on his tongue. But he realised with a pang that she was not a little girl anymore; she had been right to take that tone. Emma and Alice had a plan in place and he needed to respect that she knew what she was doing. They had only a small lead, with Gothel being occupied with Emma. She would come after them soon if she realised that they had the Dagger. So far, the only person Gothel thought knew about the Dagger was in her custody. And they had to maintain the ruse for as long as they could.

It took them a few hours, but Alice and Killian finally managed to break through the treeline and onto the short beach. Alice looked around frantically, vibrating on the spot like she was ready to explode. Killian might not know much about this version of his daughter, but her anxiety was not anything new.

“Starfish, Ariel will be here. It will be fine,” he said in a soothing, slow tone, grabbing Alice softly by the shoulders and making her look at him. “Deep breaths, sweetheart. That’s it, just concentrate on your breathing.” He did the breathing exercise along with her, until he felt she had calmed down enough.

Alice sighed, rubbing at her forehead. “Why would Mama do that?!” she exclaimed. “I never should have let her.”

Killian chuckled, despite the situation they were in. “Love, I’ve come to realise that once your mother has set her mind on something, it is neigh on impossible to change her mind. Besides, in her place, I would have done the same thing.” He let out a long breath, his hand and hook resting on his hips. “That does not mean I condone what she did.”

“That’s exactly what you did. Actually, what you did was a million times worse.” Alice’s tone might have been matter-of-fact, but her words hit him in the gut. He had had the chance to apologise to Emma, but he hardly even said goodbye to his little girl before he left her.

“Starfish, I’m so sorry. I-” But Alice held up her hand to half him mid-sentence.

“It’s alright, Papa. I mean, it’s not alright, but it is for now. We will have time for apologies and regret after we get rid of the Darkness and save Mama.”

“That is exactly what your mother said.” He was in awe of the young woman in front of him, and he owed it all to Emma. She was the one who had raised Alice into a smart, brilliant young woman. He couldn’t have done a better job; there would always be a part of him that loathed himself for missing out on the chance to be a good father. And unwittingly, he had lost that chance again because of what had happened with Charles.

He was saved from the dark direction his thoughts were taking by Ariel’s timely arrival. His joy was short lived, though, because the moment he stepped closer to Ariel, the voices in his head grew louder, the Darkness calling out to him, telling him to take his Dagger and run away. To protect himself. He squeezed his eyes shut, staying rooted in place and watched as Alice greeted the mermaid and exchanged pleasantries that he was too far away to hear, and too consumed by the sudden urge to hunt Gothel down.

He lost track of how long he had stood in one place, squeezing his eyes shut and trying to block his ears against the assault of the Darkness. He realised that he had been in control for so long because the Dagger was in another realm. It was a hundred times harder now to quell the voices in his head. He was forced out of his catatonic state by Alice dumping a bucket of cold water over his head. He started at her, dripping with salt water as she stood above him, panting slightly and the now empty bucket still held aloft.

“Th-ank you,” he sputtered out, pushing his hair from his face, and standing up properly. “I apologise, Starfish. I don’t know what got over me.”

Alice nodded, dropping the bucket next to him and taking a seat. She patted the spot next to her, but he could still hear the dull echoes of the Dagger and chose to stand instead. “Was it the Darkness?” she asked softly.

He hesitated to answer her for a very long time, but finally relented, letting out a giant sigh. “Aye.”

“It’s the Dagger.” It was more of statement than a question, and Killian was unsure what he could reply to that. Alice nodded to herself, staring at the horizon for a long time, both of them in somewhat comfortable silence.

“D’you know I hate magic?” she asked, but he had a feeling it was rhetorical, and allowed her to talk. “I do. Magic is what trapped me in that tower, magic is what took you away from me. Magic is what caused Emma and I so much pain in our lives. I could never understand why Mama loved it so much, even after all that had happened. She even wanted me to learn, harness my own magic. But she always understood. She even stopped using magic for me. She’s- She my mother in every single way. Not just in the way that counts. I actively reject Gothel as my mother.” The last part was said with such vehemence, so completely different from the tone she had adopted for the rest that it startled Killian.

He finally took a seat next to Alice, while still maintaining enough distance from the Dagger. “Darling, I realise that I have not been the best father. I know that Emma has made sure that you do not have to suffer the same fate as we both did as children. You are right, she truly is your mother in every single way, and I have just treated her so terribly. I have treated you terribly. How do we get past that? I don't have the answer to that question, I don't have the answer to so many things. I just feel so lost, I feel so miserable and ashamed. So tell me, what do I do?”

Alice sighed heavily, resting her chin on her bent knees, and just stared at the horizon. Killian waited with bated breath for a moment, before deciding that he would not be getting a reply from her. But just as he was about to get up, Alice finally responded. “You don't do anything, Papa. You just need to give her time, give me time, and be there for us. We will get past it because we are family, and family means we never stop trying.” She got up, giving him a hand and pulling him up, dusting the sand from her dress. Killian nodded at her, feeling a sense of calm wash over him. This might not have been forgiveness, but Alice’s words gave him hope. She hesitated, as if she was contemplating saying something. “I love you, Papa. Even when I feel like I should hate you. I love you, because you’re my Papa, and because you’re here now.”

Killian swallowed thickly at the lump in his throat, wordlessly accepting the olive branch she had offered. “Let’s go, love. We have quite the journey to Camelot.”

She reached into Emma’s satchel, retrieving a leather cuff from it and handing it to him.

“I don’t think that’s my style, Starfish,” he chuckled. Regardless, he took the cuff from her, examining it. As far as leather cuffs went, it was fairly routine, nothing that stood out to him about the craftsmanship or the quality.

“It suppresses magic,” Alice explained. “In case you lose control,” she added.

Killian’s jaw clenched, the Darkness in him hissing at her insinuation. It scared him, how quickly his darker impulses came to the fore. The fear of doing something to harm his daughter was enough for him to place the cuff on immediately.

If Alice noticed the haste in which he put it on, she did not comment on it.

-/-

20 years ago: Enchanted Forest

Killian could feel every cell of his body corrupted by the black sludge of the Darkness, burning him from the inside out. All the pain and heartbreak that he had gone through amplified until his heart was nearly bursting from the agony, so much so that all he wanted to do was rip his heart from his chest and cut off his feelings all together. He felt unbelievably violated, the Darkness had taken over his body. He could feel the muck and grime settle in every crevice of his soul.

And when he emerged from his transformation, the Darkness had taken over so entirely - he felt born again, no longer restricted by the whims and restrictions of human existence. He felt the immensity of power at his disposal. He was Captain Hook once again. His lips spread into a wild grin - he had a blonde beauty to thank for liberating him.

Little did he know that Killian Jones was trapped, but alive, under the layers of rotten, filthy darkness.

-/-

Emma teleported herself back to the tower, making both Smee and Alice jump in fright. She couldn’t blame them; she did practically stumble in like a deranged maniac, frantically yelling at Smee to “Leave, now!” Alice backed away from Emma, her eyes wide and blue, fear crystal clear in them. Emma sucked in a deep breath, if only to not frighten Alice any more than she already had.

She quickly relayed what had happened to Smee, promising to tell him the whole story after she had made sure Killian was fine. She hurriedly packed a sack for Alice, carelessly throwing together outfits for her. But she had not been fast enough. When she rounded the corner from Alice’s space into the main room, a silent and docile Alice in tow, Killian was waiting for them, leaning casually against the window ledge. He looked up at that exact moment, a predatory grin on his face as he stalked towards them

Emma stopped dead in her tracks, pushing Alice behind her, the only defense between the child and the Dark One. Because the thing in front of her now was not the man she loved. This was not Killian, and frankly, she was afraid to find out who he was.

Killian stopped just in front of her, his head tilted to the side in a disapproving manner, lips in a slight pout.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk.” He crouched in front of Emma, his gaze shifting to Alice who was hiding behind her, her grip tightening on Emma’s trouser’s leg. “It’s me, Starfish,” he crooned, his predatory look shifting into something far more soft.

“Papa?” Alice sounded scared, tentative. Emma saw Killian’s jaw clench and he glared up at Emma, as if she was the one at fault for Alice fearing him. Emma met his gaze fearlessly.

He was the first one to look away, all of his attention focused on Alice. “Aye, my love. Are you ready to get out of here?”

“Really?” the child asked, a slight edge to her tone, almost like she was afraid to be hopeful.

“Aye, Starfish. Papa found a way. Told you I would, didn’t I?” he grinned, reaching past Emma and taking a willing Alice into his arms, balancing her on his hip. He turned to Emma, his electric blue eyes fixed on hers.

“Are you afraid of me?” he asked in an unexpectedly soft tone.

Emma was afraid for him. She was scared about what the Darkness was doing to him, his mood all over the place, unreadable to her. But she did not fear him. But she knew, she could bring her Killian back. She stepped forward, tentatively brushing her knuckles over his cheek, her magic sparking, triggered by the Darkness in him. He then closed his eyes at her soft touch, his entire countenance losing the air of a man with great power. When his eyes opened, they were back to the cerulean of Killian Jones. She smiled.

“I could never be afraid of you. I’m afraid for you, my love,” she confessed, her eyes shifting to Alice, who had her head resting against her father’s shoulder, her thumb in her mouth. She only did that when she was most distressed.

-/-

Killian nodded in acceptance. He grabbed her hand, pressing a kiss to her knuckles, and pulled her closer, enveloping his girls in his arms. Once he was certain that they would be shielded properly, he expelled a blast of magic, strong enough to break any spell. He wanted to get the Dark One to free his daughter, and one way or another, that was what he did. The tower started disintegrating around them, and once he felt the spell keeping Alice trapped break, he magically transported all of them to a safer location.

His feet hit the ground hard, jostling the little girl in his arms, while Emma managed to land quite gracefully on her feet. Both the adults turned their gaze on Alice, who looked around her in awe. She was truly outside the tower for the very first time. She squirmed in Killian’s hold, forcing him to let her go. And he hesitated for just a moment, concerned about her exploring too far. But Alice remained by their side, walking around and touching each tree, plant, and rock, gasping each time.

He had been enraged at Emma in the beginning; if it weren’t for her insistence that he grab the Dagger, he would have escaped this curse. But it was only because of the Darkness that he had been able to save his daughter. That couldn’t have been a bad thing, could it? He watched with amusement as his daughter explored the area around her, keeping up a constant chatter.

He chanced a glance at Emma, who was standing on the other side of the clearing they were in, but she was already looking at him with a strange expression. But she smiled at him when she noticed him looking. Odd, she looked almost contemplative.

Emma walked up to him, her hands behind her back. “I have something for you.” She looked serious, confusing him further.

“What is it, Swan?”

“Something that belongs to you,” She brought her hands forward, revealing the Dark One’s Dagger.

The Darkness flared up, screaming at him to possess it, to never let it out of his sight. With the Dagger in his hands, he could do anything he wanted. He reached for it, his hand trembling, but Emma stopped him just before he could touch it.

“Wait. Wait, we need to talk about this.”

“About what?” he growled, not able to take his eyes off of the Dagger.

“You seem different, Killian. You’re not you. Maybe I should just hold on to the Dagger for you,” she suggested. “I am just wo--”

Whatever the rest of her sentence was, Killian could not hear her over how loud the voice in his head was.

How dare she? The Darkness screamed inside his head. It’s yours to take. She is trying to control you. Is that what you want?

“Shut up! Just shut up.” He meant to snap at the voice in his head, but Emma jumped at his harsh tone, hurt flashing in her eyes.

“I-I’m sorry,” she whispered, dropping the Dagger and backing away. “I’m going to go, and um, find us some food.” Emma walked away from the clearing and toward the dirt road that led to the village. He watched as she glanced at Alice, hesitated, and then kept walking. His gut clenched: he scared her.

What if she was running away from him?

He took and Dagger and placed it in his jacket. He grabbed Alice, despite her protests against being dragged away from turtles, and followed after Emma. Alice continued to cry, beating on his back to let her down, but as much as it pained him, he needed to find Emma, and reassure her. It was just a misunderstanding; everything would be alright.

-/-

Present day: Enchanted Forest

Emma struggled against the magical shackles Gothel had her bound in, but it was in vain. Her binds were too tight. Her wrists painfully rubbed against them when she tried to wriggle her hand out.

“Why are you doing this? Why are you after me?” she spat out at Gothel.

Gothel ignored her, rummaging through the myriad of bottles on the table opposite, her back turned to Emma. A couple of moments passed and Emma started to sweat in the humid room. Gothel had restrained her in the woods and used magic to transport them both. The place resembled the mines, except instead of stone, the walls were made of soil. So it was damp, but still very hot.

Gothel let out a triumphant shout, finally having found what she had been looking for. She moved to face Emma, dangling a small vial at her. “Do you recognise this?”

“Should I?” Emma sassed, glaring at the witch.

“It’s something I made, just for you. It’s mostly sulphur.”

“Aw, you shouldn’t have.”

Gothel ignored Emma’s cheekiness. “Actually, I did use it on you once. Do you remember that?”

Emma glared at her, her heart raced simply remembering the pain Gothel’s poison had caused. But Gothel continued, observing Emma with curiosity. “It was meant to corrupt you; that was what the sulphur was meant for. It destroys light magic from within. You should have never been able to survive that.” She crouched in front of Emma, her head tilted to one side, her cold eyes staring at her unblinkingly, unnerving her. “I wondered, how you managed to stay so young over the years. I always assumed you used a glamour spell or a potion. It was only when I realised that my potion did not work that I started understanding what was really going on.”

Gothel smirked at her. Emma knew her panic was clear by her expression. “You have a part of the Darkness in you, Princess,” Gothel whispered gleefully. “My dark magic is no match for that, I know that now. I’m sure you’re suffering enough as it is. You wouldn’t survive losing your magic - you can’t live without it and you can’t live with it.”

Emma couldn’t understand how the witch had figured out her secret. She had been so certain that no one knew about it - not even Alice. It had taken a couple of years for Emma herself to even realise and understand. When Killian had linked the two of them together, some of the Darkness from him transferred to her. Emma assumed that the dark magic she had been sensing had been through the link belonged to Killian. But it was the dark magic in her own veins. Her magic was corrupted, both light and dark a part of each other. It had only become worse over the past 20 years.

Emma had not revealed this part of the plan to Killian for this reason - once they destroyed the Darkness, it would destroy her magic as well. It had been made pretty clear what would happen to her without her magic. She couldn’t bring herself to tell her daughter and her love that she would not survive this. That there was no happily ever after for her.

-/-

20 years ago: Enchanted Forest

Emma heard Alice’s cries before she heard Killian calling her name. She whirled around, startled to see the latter run up to her, holding a crying Alice in his arms.

“Swan,” he breathed, stopping a few feet away from her.

“What’s wrong with Alice?” she asked, stepping forward and taking the crying child into her arms, rubbing her hand over Alice’s back to comfort her. Alice wrapped her arms tightly around Emma’s neck, her cries muffled on Emma’s shoulder.

Killian looked helpless, like he was on the verge of crying himself. He sank to the ground, sitting slumped against a tree, running his hands through his hair, pulling at it painfully. It hurt Emma to see him in such a condition, but she was clueless to help him.

“I think I frightened her. I just- I needed to come after you. I needed to stop you, Swan,” he said after a long while, desperation dripping from his voice.

Alice’s cries had died down by then, and she had drifted off, slumped against Emma. She did not blame her; Alice had had a very eventful evening and it must have been too frightening and confusing for a six-year-old to handle, no matter how intuitive she was.

“Stop me from what, Killian?” Emma snapped, her voice coming out in harsh whisper. “You yelled at me to ‘Shut up.’ I thought you needed a moment to calm yourself.”

“I do not need to calm myself. I’m fine,” he bit out through clenched teeth.

“No, you are not. This is not who you are - flying tempers, making Alice cry? That is the Darkness. You are losing control. We need to get rid of it.”

He rose up, his eyes narrowed, and he looked at Emma contemplatively. “Oh, is that why you held on to my dagger? So you can ensure I don’t ‘lose control?’ You want to control me, is that it?”

“Of course not!” Emma protested. She switched Alice to her hip, leaving one hand free. She did not want to, but if it came down to it, she had to protect herself and Alice against the Darkness. Even if it meant she had to harm him. “Killian, this is not you.”

“No, Emma. This is better,” he argued, keeping his voice down. Emma was relieved that he did not wake Alice up: she did not want the little girl to see her father this way. “I was finally able to get my daughter out of that hell. The only way I was able to do that was with magic. My magic. Not yours.”

Emma reeled at that, feeling like she had been slapped. “I offered to use my magic. I would have done anything for Alice, you know that!”

But Killian ignored her, powering through his own speech. “You told me to grab the Dagger, Swan. You forced this on me, and now that I actually seem to like it, you just can’t handle it.” He wagged a finger at her, grinning like a maniac. “That’s it, isn’t it, love? You can’t handle the fact that I’m stronger than you. That I don’t need your magic.”

Emma bit her lip, her heart clenching at his accusations, trying to convince herself that it was the Darkness making him say these things. He wanted to hurt her, but she couldn’t give him that satisfaction.

“You and I both know that that’s not true. We are a family. It doesn’t matter who is more powerful.”

“Ah, see, that’s where you’re wrong, Swan. All this time, you had me convinced that I needed you, that I needed your magic to save my daughter, when in fact, I didn’t need you at all. Maybe you knew all along what needed to be done. You were just afraid that you would be left alone again, forever the orphan Princess.”

Tears came unbidden to Emma, every word coming out of Killian’s mouth hitting the mark. She pulled Alice closer, drawing comfort from her daughter.

“That is not fair. You’re not thinking straight,” she said quietly. Whether she was trying to convince Killian or herself, she wasn’t sure. Her hand trembled as she reached for his, the dark magic sizzling under his fingertips. “This is not you. This is not the man I love.”

“Perhaps the man you love is no more,” he whispered, his eyes looking away from her, unable to meet her gaze.

Emma was rendered speechless. She was not sure what she could possibly do to bring her Killian back to her.

“I refuse to believe that,” she said with conviction, drawing his attention back to her. “I love you, Killian Jones. Whether the Darkness likes it or not, I am not leaving.” She grew more confident when he seemed to listen, drawing closer to him, her hand drawing up his arm and resting against his chest. “I know your heart, I know you’re still there. Push the voices away. It’s just the three of us here - you, me, and Alice.”

Killian let out a deep breath, stepping away from her, Emma’s hand dropping. “I don’t know what’s happening, Swan,” he confessed, biting down hard at his lip. He squeezed his eyes shut, massaging his forehead.

Emma looked on, worried and helpless, wondering what she could possibly do to help her fiancé. “Talk to me, tell me what is going on inside your head. Lean on me.”

Killian nodded, pulling her closer. He hesitated, before holding his arms out to take his daughter, and letting out a relieved breath when Emma handed her over. He held Alice close, centering himself.

“I apologise for the things I said to you, Emma. I wasn’t thinking clearly.”

Emma nodded, wordlessly accepting his apology. But she had to know. ”Did you mean any of it? Do you really think- do you think that I kept things from you? That I tricked you into falling in love with me?” Her questions slipped out one after another, her insecurity rearing its ugly head.

Killian immediately pulled back, his hook resting on her waist. “No, absolutely not! I was- They were senseless words said in spite, my love. I was being an arse, and I’m sorry.” A beat later, he added, “I never meant for those words to come out, Emma. It- I was just so angry, I was hurt. And in that moment, I wanted to hurt you, like you hurt me.”

Emma swallowed thickly, not allowing him to notice the fear she felt building inside, painting a smile on her face instead. “It was the Darkness, Killian. It wasn’t you. I’ve seen this before, I’ve seen the way it corrupts and destroys. We need to get rid of it, once and for all.”

-/-

Present day: Camelot

It had taken Killian and Alice a week to reach Camelot by foot. He couldn’t use his magic, and Alice had never tried using hers. While it had given them plenty of time to talk and for Killian to get to know his daughter again, each day was agonising as they both feared for Emma’s life. Neither of them could understand why Gothel would want Emma, but the longer it took them to get rid of the Darkness, the worse their imaginations became. It had come to a point where neither of them spoke about what was happening to Emma; once again, she had sacrificed herself for Killian and Alice. Talking about it did nothing to relieve their guilt.

“Have you met this Merlin fellow before?” Killian asked, turning to Alice.

“Well, sort of. A very long time ago, we heard a rumour of an ancient sorcerer who could destroy the Darkness. But after a couple of months of research, we grew tired. It had been ten years at that point, I think, since you had been gone. It was a difficult year, for Mama. I was a hellion during my late adolescence,” Alice said, making Killian chuckle.

Another good thing about the time he had spent with Alice? He was slowly beginning to let go of his guilt and enjoy learning new tidbits of information about his daughter’s life.

“I’m sure if anyone could have handled it, Emma could have.”

“You’re not wrong. But that did deter her from looking for a way to get rid of the Darkness. Perhaps, if we had kept looking, we could have been reunited sooner.” Alice shot him a tight smile, before looking down, remorseful.

Killian couldn’t have his daughter blaming herself in any way. He stopped her, grasping her shoulders with hand and hook, waiting patiently for her to meet his eye. “Listen to me, Starfish. You have nothing to feel upset about. Things happened the way they were bound to happen. Emma made a decision to be a mother first. If I were in her place, I would have done the same thing.”

Alice shook her head, pushing Killian away, her arms crossed petulantly. “This is all my fault. This started because you wanted to rescue me from that tower. Maybe I was better off-”

“No!” Killian snapped, making Alice jump. He wouldn’t blame her; even when she had been a child, he had never raised his voice at her, let alone as an adult. “You need to stop blaming yourself. That is far too heavy a burden to carry on your shoulders, love. Gothel trapped you in that tower, and nothing you could have said or done would have stopped either me or Emma from saving you. You’re our daughter - and that is what you do for your family, Alice. So, don’t you dare think we would be better off. You saved me from a life of a pointless pursuit for revenge, you were there for Emma all those years I was gone. I probably never would have met Emma if it weren’t for you. I owe everything to you, my darling.” He smiled, drawing her into his arms, pressing a soft kiss to the side of her head. “Enough with such talk. Let us get to Merlin.”

Another fifteen minutes of walking led father and daughter to a dilapidated bridge, both of them looking around concerned and confused. The more they ventured into Camelot, the more they were starting to realise that there was no one there; everything in Camelot seemed to be broken down, vines and shrubbery overgrown on the buildings. Everything looked abandoned, not like the thriving city Killian had come to expect.

“Are you sure this is the right place, Starfish?” Killian asked, helping her over a large, fallen pillar.

“Aye,” she said, jumping to the ground with a grunt. “At least, I think so. This is Camelot.”

“And this is where Merlin is supposed to be?” Killian asked with a scoff. “It looks like he hasn’t been here for a while.”

“Looks can be deceptive, Captain Jones,” a man’s voice spoke from behind them.

Killian and Alice whirled around, both of them drawing their cutlasses out and pointed them at the man’s throat. He seemed oddly calm, smiling at them despite the threat. Killian regarded him curiously: he was dressed in brown and gold robes, his arms at his sides and looking at them pleasantly, as if his life wasn’t being threatened. Killian could only think of one person who could be that brave.

“Merlin,” he declared, his sword still held pointed at the wizard.

“Indeed. Now, if you could be so kind as to lower your weapons…”

Killian and Alice complied, sheathing their weapons. But Killian couldn’t shake the wariness he felt. “What did you mean, ‘looks can be deceptive?’” Killian’s eyebrow raised questioningly at the wizard.

If possible, Merlin’s grin grew wider and he waved his hand. Killian and Alice gasped at their surroundings melted away like candle wax, the decrepit area replaced by a thriving town square, people milling around them, vendors selling their wares.

Killian and Alice gaped as they saw all the people - Killian could not wrap his head around the display of magic. Just a moment ago, the place had been completely empty and neglected.

“Just a simple glamour to keep out unsavory characters,” Merlin assured, his hands clasped in front of him. “Queen Guinevere had it put up when she formed the kingdom with Ser Lancelot,” he informed them.

Killian was taken aback; all the stories that he had heard in the Land without Magic, King Arthur was the ruler of Camelot, and Lancelot was just a knight. “What about King Arthur?”

Merlin sighed, shaking his head. “Arthur...Well, he was nothing but a disappointment. Thankfully, our queen recognised it and made sure the people did not suffer from his obsession and neglect.” He clapped his hands together, making father and daughter stare at one another doubtfully. “However, you are here for a different reason, aren’t you?”

Killian shared a look with Alice before he stepped forward. “Perhaps there is somewhere else for us to speak, mate? Somewhere private, maybe?”

-/-

Present: Enchanted Forest

Emma let out an agonising scream, straining heavily in her bonds, as Gothel’s newest creation wreaked havoc on her. The witch had been torturing Emma for the past week, injecting her with different concoctions, exploiting the Darkness in her to make her weaker. For so long, she had been able to manage having the Darkness be a part of her, had resisted using her magic for this very reason. Every time she had used her magic, it had been painful. It had taken her a year or two to get used to the Darkness and to train herself to draw from the light magic only. It had been fairly easy, there was hardly any dark magic in her. But she had not accounted for the Darkness to draw power from the light magic, never accounted for its growth.

The more the Darkness grew in her, the weaker she had become. She hadn’t noticed it all until a year ago when she had found Merlin. He had noticed the growing Darkness in her, he had been the one to tell her of her fate; he had also told her that there was no way for them to separate the dark and light magic in her. They exist as one and would be destroyed as one. Perhaps, if you had come to me sooner, he had said. He had been the one to tell her Killian would be the only other person who would be able to remove just the Darkness. It had originally been a part of him, and would thus go back to him, leaving her light magic behind. Theoretically, that would be the outcome. She had almost tested that theory out, before Alice had come back.

Unfortunately for Emma, Gothel had learnt her secret as well. She had been injecting Emma with different potions to activate the Darkness in her. The weaker Emma grew, the less resistant she could be to Gothel’s magic. She intended to get Emma as weak as she possibly could, before Gothel forced Emma to reveal the plan to get rid of the Darkness.

For the past week, Emma had been confident that she would be able to make it. Until today, Emma could feel the Darkness take root. She could feel the pain in every cell of her body, as if she was burning from within. It was unbearable, and Emma couldn’t help but cry out. She had almost given up, almost begged Gothel to make it stop - but she refused to give the witch that satisfaction. She was stronger than that - she was the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming. Her parents had faced death with dignity; they might have been defeated, but they had their integrity. If Emma had to die, she would prefer to have her integrity intact. It was all she had left of her parents.

“My, my, aren’t you the stubborn one,” Gothel spat, wrapping her hand around Emma’s throat and squeezing. “But you are so weak now, Emma. You’re no match for my magic.”

“Do whatever the hell you want. You can never stop the Darkness from being destroyed.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, my dear. You’re going to tell me exactly what your plan is, and I’m going to make certain you lot rue the day you met me.”

-/-

20 years ago: Enchanted Forest

Killian and Emma had managed to set up camp at a riverbed. He caught them some fish, despite not feeling hungry, and Emma built a fire. Alice, now awake, watched everything they did with rapt attention, and she even helped Killian catch fish, jumping with joy when she first felt the water lapping at her feet, the smaller fish tickling her as they swam past. Killian silently enjoyed her carefreeness, her heart soaring at her happiness. This was all he wanted for her - but he had never anticipated the price would have been so steep. He knew what needed to be done, now. He had no control over this Darkness. He was weak, he had succumbed to it before in the past, and he had let it take over today. He could not imagine what would happen when he was not strong enough to pull back. He had seen the way it had wrecked Baelfire’s family, seen what the Darkness had turned Rumplestiltskin into.

He did not want that for his family. He pulled out the magic bean he had been carrying with him for centuries, having stolen it from Pan on his very last visit to Neverland. He had held on to it in hopes that he would use it once he had freed Alice. But he needed to get away from here, where the temptation was always there. Nothing would be able to stop him from sinking, not even his family.

He had heard of the Land without Magic from Baelfire; he would use the bean to go there. He would make sure he did not have his memories, that he would have nothing that would bring him back here. Not until Emma had found a cure to this plague. She would understand his reasons, she had to. Killian could not handle being here, he did not want to fight against the Darkness for a second longer than he had to. And if he went to the Land without Magic, he wouldn’t have to.

Once the fish was caught, cooked, and consumed, Alice promptly fell asleep again. That was good, he decided. He would not be able to tell Alice goodbye; he couldn’t watch her cry again. He had hurt her enough.

“Killian?” Emma called out, pulling him away from his thoughts. “Is everything alright? Is it- is the Darkness speaking to you again?” she asked, worry evident in her tone.

He smiled at her half-heartedly, grabbing her right hand in his own, fiddling with the green stone ring on her finger. He remembered the night she had told him the story about it, about how her mother had stolen the ring from her father, and how Prince David found Snow White, and how they fell in love. He wanted something like that for them. He wanted True Love. He wanted to believe that they would find each other again, no matter how long it took.

“No, darling. Just my own thoughts that are keeping me awake.”

“Do you want to talk about it? After all, aren’t married people supposed to share their burdens?” Emma teased, smiling coyly at him.

“Oh, Swan,” he said, wrapping an arm around her shoulder, pulling her to him. Emma snuggled into his body, pressing her nose to his neck, exhaling softly. “I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too, Jones.”

He closed his eyes, revelling in the moment, burning it to his memory. He needed just a moment, where everything was alright. He had finally managed to free his child, and he was engaged to the woman he loved. If it weren’t for the Darkness, this would be the best moment of his life; he wanted to pretend that it was. Just for a moment.

So he did, but he pulled away the next. “I need to talk to you, Emma.”

Emma pursed her lips, staring at him seriously. “Why do I get the feeling that I won’t like what you are about to say?”

“Oh, you will most surely hate it. But I-”

“Don’t say it,” she cut him off. “Don’t do it. Whatever you are thinking of - don’t.”

He sighed deeply, reaching for her hand, but she pulled away. She eyed him warily, her arms wrapped around herself protectively. “You don’t get to hold my hand and break my heart, Killian.”

“Dammit, Emma. I’m not trying to hurt you. I’m doing this for you,” Killian snapped, standing up and starting to pace. “I need to leave, get far away from here. I am not strong enough to control this. I will descend much deeper into the Darkness, and I cannot come out of it. I will hurt you and Alice. I don’t want that.”

“What about what we want?” Emma whispered, eerily calm. “What about what I want? I want you to stay, and fight this. You have us, lean on us.” She stood up too, her eyes glassy with tears, her teeth biting the inside of her cheek.

“I can’t, Emma. Please, don’t make me. I can’t fight. I will fail, and I don’t want that. I don’t want this Darkness. I never should have taken the Dagger.” Killian could hear the desperation in his own voice.

Emma let out a long, shuddering breath. “What do you want to do?” she asked, after a long silence.

And so he told her, every detail of his plan laid out in front of Emma. He could practically see how every word out of his mouth broke her heart a little bit more. But she let him talk and listened attentively. She didn’t say a word, not until he was done.

“You’ll be in this Land without Magic, and you will not have any of your memories, is that right?” she asked softly, her eyes trained on the ground.

He waited a beat, hoping she would look up at him. But when it became evident that she wouldn’t, he replied with a simple ‘Aye.’

She took in a deep breath, and exhaled slowly, nodding to herself. She finally looked him in the eye, her gaze sharp and determined, every bit the stubborn, strong woman he had fallen in love with. “I will get the answer to this dilemma, and I will come for you. I will find you.” Her words were confident and firm. Before he could thank her, however, she cut him off. “Do not think for one moment that this doesn’t break my heart.”

He swallowed thickly, knowing that there was only one thing left to you. “I need to leave now. Before Alice wakes up.”

Emma’s brows pulled together, and he could sense her anger. “You’re not even going to tell your daughter goodbye?” she demanded.

“I can’t do it, Emma. She will be devastated, she will make me stay. I can’t allow that to happen.”

She stared at him quietly, her rage radiating off of her in waves, her eyes wide and nostrils flaring. “You are a coward, Killian Jones,” she declared.

He hung his head in shame, moving toward his sleeping daughter, kneeling beside her. His throat was thick with tears, his heart hurt simply thinking about leaving her. He had never been so far from her - now, not only would he be in another realm, he would have no memory of her. It was for the best, though. It had be.

He squeezed his eyes shut, brushing Alice’s hair away from her forehead, pressing the lightest of kisses there, lingering for a moment before he pulled away. He took her in for a moment, knowing that he would miss watching her grow up. Just a few years, he told himself. You will see her in a few years.

“You don’t have to leave, Killian.” Emma’s soft voice floated through the air. “You could stay.”

Killian got up, taking one last look at his daughter before he turned to Emma. “Have you come up with a way to replace my memories in the Land without Magic?” he asked her, ignoring her statements.

She sighed, clearly still angry with him, but nodded. “I can modify your existing memories, I can store the real ones in a Dreamcatcher.”

“Let us do this, then.”

-/-

Present: Camelot

“This is yours?” Killian asked, tracing the hilt of Excalibur, Merlin’s name etched on the blade. It looked just like the Dark One’s dagger, only much longer and with an end missing. But Merlin explained that as well - how he had forged Excalibur, how the sword was broken by the first Dark One, how the Dark One had murdered his love, Nimue. How he tethered the Darkness to the Dagger.

The Darkness hissed at that, screaming at Killian to destroy the wizard and ravage Camelot, to let it free. He was thankful for the cuff preventing him from doing any magic, because he was certain he would have given in. He could hear the whispers from the Dagger, driving him insane.

“Yes,” Merlin answered. “Now you know everything you need to. We need to hurry, rid the world of this Darkness. Once and for all.”

“What about Gothel?” Alice asked. “What if she decides to stop us?”

“She will need to go through me, then,” Killian piped up, his jaw clenched tight. “Where do we need to go to find this Promethean flame?” he asked, addressing Merlin.

“It’s not too far, but I need to warn you. This is your battle, Killian. The Darkness will try everything to convince you not to do this. You will either win, or it will take over you, forever. There can be no cuff stopping you from using your magic,” Merlin warned. “This is ancient magic, more powerful than you could ever imagine. You did not have to face its true extent for decades, if what you say is true.”

“Aye, I understand.” Killian had made up his mind - after everything his daughter and Emma had sacrificed for him, he needed to step up. He had to face everything he had run away from, and he needed to start with the Darkness.

“Papa, perhaps we should talk about this?” Alice suggested, looking vexed at the task ahead of them. “Couldn’t I do this?” she asked Merlin.

“No, Starfish. It is my turn to take care of you now. I need to face my demons. And I will,” Killian vowed. He turned to Merlin. “Tell me everything I need to do, and I will do it.”

-/-

Present Day: Enchanted Forest

Emma panted heavily, her wrists sore from the constant friction against the shackles, feeling weak and useless as Gothel used her vile magic to delve into her mind. It was the worst torment, feeling a strange presence in her mind, moving through her thoughts and memories, invading her. It was a great violation, one that left her sick to her stomach. No matter how much she tried to resist, Gothel’s magic was stronger than Emma’s.

If there was any light magic left in her, it was hindered by the shackles she wore or was buried deep under layers of dark magic. Emma wanted to cry; her light magic had been the only constant in her life, and for it to be violated and corrupted, hurt in innumerable ways. She had never thought there could exist a person so cruel, a person who understood how precious natural magic was and could still inflict such horrors on another, like Gothel was.

She had tried so hard, for so long, to fight. But she had lost all ability to - and if she was being honest with herself, all will to. Emma was tired of being strong. She had finally been broken, and she did not have the fight left in her. She knew that was what Gothel wanted, and she had tried so hard not to give the witch that satisfaction - but she couldn’t hold on anymore.

Emma closed her eyes, tears running down the corners of her eyes, and she gave complete control of herself to Gothel. The Darkness had won.

-/-

20 years ago: Enchanted Forest

Emma gave the Dreamcatcher to Killian, not able to bring herself to take his memories. He understood, knowing that what he had already asked of her was a great enough price. She could not believe what Killian was about to do. She was certain that it was the Darkness in him that had made him so paranoid and so selfish. She would have fought him on his decision, if she had been talking to Killian alone. But the Darkness was unpredictable, and she could understand Killian’s fear. She might not support his decision, but she could at least understand where he came from.

She stood to the side, as she watched him perform the spell to transfer his memories on to the Dreamcatcher once he had crossover to the other realm. She still had him here with her, for a few moments at least. She fiddled with her mother’s ring for a moment before she took it off all together. Emma approached Killian, both of them smiling shakily at each other.

“My pirate,” she whispered fondly, looking up at him, her eyes roaming over every inch of his face, etching him into her memory. “It’s almost time, isn’t it?”

“Aye. Emma. I am sorry, love.” He brushed his knuckles down her cheek softly, looking at her with a kind of broken tenderness that made her gut clench.

She pressed her mother’s ring in his palm, shocking him. He stared at her, his lips moving wordlessly. “I just thought - Well, you gave me a ring. It felt right, to give you my mother’s. It’s a promise, I guess. And- We never got to the wedding, technically, and I expect that once you come back. But until then….” She trailed off, closing his fingers around the ring.

“Until then,” he vowed, softly, but with great conviction.

She nodded, swallowing hard at the lump in her throat. It was useless, though, as tears welled heavy in her eyes. She clutched the lapel of his greatcoat tightly, pulling him down to her. She pressed their lips together, kissing him with everything she had, wet and desperate, their breaths mingling every time they pulled back for air. She was loathe to end it, biting down on his lip. Killian was the one to pull away, his hand on her shoulder, both of them breathing heavily.

He pulled the Dagger from inside his jacket, handing it to Emma with a trembling hand. “Hold on to this for me, aye?”

Emma took the Dagger with both hands, her thumb tracing his name etched in the metal. “There’s still time to change your mind.”

“Swan.”

“I know...I - I don’t know how long it will be until I see you again. What if I never find a way to save you? You’re immortal, I am not.”

Killian nodded, his eyes serious and unwavering. “I know, love. And I think I know a way to prevent that.”

“What?” she asked, curious. He hesitated, looking at her with a strange, apologetic look in his eyes. “What is it?” she demanded, pulling away from him completely.

“I’m sorry, Emma. I couldn’t think of another way,” he said, sounding helpless.

“What do you-”

But before she could finish the sentence, he released a burst of magic her way. Emma gasped, feeling the Darkness hit her, the force of it sending her flying. She felt her magic flare up to fight against the invading power, the heavy, foul magic pushing its way through. Emma could feel it flow through her veins, her entire body unbearably hot. She could hardly move, laying slumped against a tree.

Emma gaped at Killian, the betrayal causing bile to rise in her throat, tears of anger threatening to fall. He looked remorsefully at her, his heartbreak apparent on his features.

“I am so sorry, Swan,” he called out. He threw the bean to the ground, the portal opening up immediately. “I love you. This was the only way I could make sure we see other again.”

Emma choked on a sob, feeling breathless and crippled, watching as Killian walked through the portal, leaving her with a gaping hole in her chest, and whatever spell he hit her with, destroying both her heart and soul, in one fell swoop.

#cs ff #knightrook #csbb #cs angst #tw: gothel

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decadenttimetravelmentality-blog · 6 years

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My husband and I have health insurance through his job, and now my job is offering to pay for some of my life insurance. We are going to get life insurance from his company, but I just wondered if it was a bad idea to have life insurance through two companies.""

Car insurance for teenagers?

Im 18 and I own a used car. Never a trouble maker. I have a part time job. I want to know what insurance I can get for my car that is affordable.

Will named driver insurance cost a lot for me?

My sis has been driving for a number of years and is 25 and I haven't had any lessons and i'm 27. Would it cost a lot to put me on her insurance as a named driver so I can get some practice? As far as I know she's drove for around 5 years with no claims.

I need help finding a good cheap sporty used car with low insurance rates.?

Well I turn 16 in december, I've had my permit for about two months and my family is at total loss of cars. My sister and her car are going to College, and my mom is using the Sienna. So my dads been riding his motorcycle to work. However, he wont be able to do so because he has a 30 mile commute to work. So he needs a car before the rain rolls in, so when he gets a car it'll be his, until I get my license, then it becomes ours. However, all my ideas are getting shot down, but as we get closer to needing one, slowly he's getting more okay with my ideas, but I need your help. I want an Rx8, I've wanted one since I was in 4th grade. I know I know. What the hell, why? A rotary engine with not even 2 litres. barely any horsepower and only gets 16/26 mpg. Well I've driven an Rx8 and I think they're amazing. HOWEVER, my dad doesnt want one for one reason, and one reason only. High insurance. So I was wondering if you can help me find a sporty used car, that I could find pretty cheap. For some Ideas I like, Bmw 330ci's, 328i's, rx8's, G37 coupes. OH YEAH, that reminds me, I'd like a coupe, but a 4 door would work well too if it still maintains a sleek style. like a lexus IS250s. Manual transmission or automatic is fine. decent mileage. you know the drill, OH and it must be atleast 4 seater. Thank you, its greatly appreciated.""

Do car insurance and registration have to be under the same name?

let's say Sally buys a car and it's under her name but gets car insurance under her sister's name. is that okay? or both have to be under Sally's name?

A question on fully comprehensive car insurance cover?

im 17 years old and am insured with quinn direct. I was just wondering if i would be able to drive other cars not insured under my name on third party? thanks for the help :)

Insurance for a honda civic?

I am 16 years old getting insurance for the first time got my licence a week ago never driven on it.....i want the simplest insurance ever something that will let me drive my car legally

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Tell me how it is right that insurance companies charge young adult males more than female for car insurance?

The answer I seem to get is it can be statistically proven that males are more aggressive,speed and get into more accidents. That may be the case, but I am sure you can prove that a particular ethnicitiy gets into more accidents too, or that people with a particular eye color get into more accidents or that people with an IQ below 100 get into more accidents. So why don't they charge them more for car insurance too? You can say insurance companies have the right to charge more if an event is more likely to happen, like Earthquake insurance is more expensive in California than it is in Michigan. The difference there is that when you charge Californians more there, you are basing it on an uncontrollable act of nature that is almost certain to happen, but when you charge that male more for car insurance you are making judgements about a person's character, making assumptions about his future behavior and financially punishing him for it before he has even done anything. Tell me where I am wrong""

Can i get insurance on my car with out a licence?

Im 18..and i have a car..i dont have a licence yet...only my permit..so can i still get insurance on the car with out a licence?

How much does the average American pay for Healthcare?

Spending on health care to reach $5,170 per Canadian in 2008 http://secure.cihi.ca/cihiweb/dispPage.jsp?cw_page=media_13nov2008_e I'm looking for this in American.""

""What are some cheap first cars, and low insurance.?""

I have 3400, in my bank account and ive been searching for a used car. The most I'd like to spend is 3000, so i have some leftover to get me started on insurance and license plates..Any suggestions on a good first car to look for? Also whats a good Max Milage on a used car? Like 100k? or 150k? I have no clue.""

How can i get cheaper car insurance?

I have 2 years no claims bonus and im 19 and only drive a little 1.4 honda civic, but my insurance premium this year is apparantly going to be 900 (cheapest quote) is there any way of lowering this utterly rediculous price? I thought that after a couple of years driving the price was supposed to go down significantly well this is not the case.""

Best and cheap major health insurance?

What are the minimum state requirements for car insurance in california?

Does having a medical marijuana card affect auto insurance?

can auto insurance companies raise your rates if you have a medical marijuana card

Blue Cross/Shield health insurance?

Is this Insurance corporation a good one or a bad one to have as a health care plan?

Cheap Car Insurance for a 17 Year old in the UK?

Im a male, i dont want no comparison sites as they are useless i can find sites that will give me good quotes, and please dont tell me to insure a 1.0 - 1.2 litre engine as i have figured out i can insure a 1.9 diesel engine for like 200 more. However i want to know if you know anymore than my current listen i have tried: Tesco llyods Tsb Direct line Virgin Vauxhall Citreon Peugoet If you know anymore can you please tell me thank you""

Motorcycle insurance?

Hey everyone just looking for some good places to go for my motorcycle insurance. I live in california L.A, county more east. Anyways im 27 no tickets anything for the last couple of years. i know you cant tell me a price but i was looking for places that have good deals and customer services. im just looking for liability. 2007 kawaski zzr. thanks guys.""

Insurance regulations?

does the commissioner of insurance have the authority to govern foreign producers/ foreign companies. these are business entities that sell insurance in there state but there home office is in another?

Insurance help please?

got hit from behind by a driver who has insurance, i notified my insurance what happens next ? will my car get repaired by his company or mine ? and how does a deductible work ? Ive never been in an accident so i am clueless on this,,,,,and how do they fix your car ? do they tell you where to go to repair it ? or just give you the money ? and how do you determine how much ? sorry for being uninformed completely !!!! thanks for your knowledge""

Is there a new law about not having car insurance?

i heard the law had just changed in California and my insurance just ran out in order to renew i need to drive to the bank and im not sure if i can with no insurance

What's the best life insurance?

This question is for my mom. My mom is 63 years old and needs life insurance. She is in great condition. Never smoked or done drugs. She never drinks alcohol. The only thing really is that she has been told she is borderline diabetic. My mom doesn't have a lot of money so she would like to find an insurance that is very cheap. Her job will be ending in July an will only have her disability to live off of. So what's the best life insurance?

Insurance's on a 16 year old driver?

i am 16 years old and i am looking for cars.. i found a used 2006 audi a6, i really like it and i want it to be my first car!!! does any body know how much it would cost too insure me under it ??????????""

Does full coverage auto insurance cover vandalism?

recently someone has threw a bottle of nail polish to my car, not a big deal no dents or anything, but what if they come back and smash my windows and tire does my insurance cover that?""

Car Insurance for 16 year old son?

Hey, Im a 16 year old boy turning 17 in 5 months. I have been eligable to get a license since December 23,2011. My parents dont want me to get it ONLY because the insurance will cost too much. I live in Florida. I only want to be a secondary on the insurance and im not going to own my own car. Will it really cost that much? I havent gotten any driving penaltys or anything like that.""

Can you have 2 different cars with different insurance?

my grandma bout a car for me, im only 15 so shes gonna give me the car when i turn 16 which is in january. she went down to L.a ( we live in california by the way) to buy the car with her nephew in law. shes 62 and half blind and doesnt have a license so she had to put the car in his name. but SHE paid for it. i told my mom and she was like if she wants to put the car in my her name she can. cuz me and my mom both know that her nephew in law could call up the police and say she stole his car, cuz the car is legally in his name and so is the insurance. and this man is very very crooked, he doesnt have a job and even steals money from his wife. he tried multiple times to steal the car so my grandma locks it in the garage. she even offered for him to buy the car off her for 300 dollars when she paid 1600 dollars but he wanted the car for free. now he is a...stupid man and he does not yet realize that he could call the cops and get the car easily so im trying to get this done as soon as possible. he aint paying for nothing on that car. im not worried that this man taking the car means i wont get a car. im worried that he might cheat my grandma, and that just doesnt site with me. he seems to catch and attitude with her when im not around but when im their i dont here no problems. so can i my mom get the car in her name with two different insurance providers and can the insurance still be in his name but the car in my moms name. and what if he refuses to sign it over can we still get the car. im sorry i had to air out my dirty laundry but i needed to release this anger""

Changing motorcycles and insurance question?

Long story short I have got a new bike. The bike I am Insured on has about 2 months left before I gather another year no claims. However, I was wondering would/do Insurance companies offer a way for me to transfer the next/last 2 months to my new bike (At a possible cost) then charge me a full year when its due (In 2 months) Any help will be appreciated. I don't want to phone my insurance up cause every time I phone someone like that and tell them I have a new bike I want to insure they go crazy and keep phoning me! I have 1 years NCB and i'll be 18 in 2 months (when I will get 2 year NCB) Cheers Geoff""

Where can i get the cheapest insurance on a performance car at 17?

hi i am 16 and will be 17 soon i've got an Rs1600i all ready i've checked before on comparethemeerkat.com ans the best i got was 5 grand lol i really dont wanna pay that much and im not willing to have any other car cos im a fussy B******

How does a new independent insurance agent get appointed/chartered by insurance carriers?

I'm starting a new independent insurance agency in NJ and foresee difficulty getting appointed/chartered by insurance carriers. Can anyone confirm this to true? Also, if this is the case are there any other options for a new agent? I've heard of 'brokers' that will fill this void and have access to many carrier however they keep 33% of the commissions. Any other options for new agents that anyone might be aware of? - Thanks a lot for any input!""

Will insurance cover a new windshield/ price of windshield?

i have 3 big cracks in my windshield and it's going to bust soon if i don't get it fixed. does car insurance cover that? and if not, how much would it cost? its a 2005 ford focus""

Car Insurance?

I am in the process of my my own car. I have been sharing my dads old car with my sister. I am 21, I got my licesnce when I was 18, and I have not yet had it three years. My dad called the insurance company and they told him it would be over 2600 paid in full because I have not had my liscence for 3 years, and in January it will drop. is this true, or does he just not want me to get a car?""

Best Life Insurance?

I need life insurance................ which company do you think has the better life insurance policies?

affordable health insurance for veterans

""Affordable, good health insurance in Georgia?

I buy my own health insurance. Currently I am being ripped off by Blue Cross Blue Shield! They suck and they are very expensive. Anyone know a better health insurance that is not too expensive? I am a 27 year old female that makes $300 a week (just got laid off to part-time)

Where can i find cheap auto insurance?

i'm paying 150 a month for a 94 ford thunderbird, but i'm looking for something cheaper that i can afford. i'm just wondering how much other people pay for cars like mine...""

Do insurance companies look into your driving record?

When getting an auto insurance quote they ask if you have any major violations. Do they only know if u tell them, or will they eventually find out of u lie?""

2003 Hummer H2 insurance cost? For 16 year old? 10 points!?

How much will the insurance cost for this car? This car is FREE for me because it's my dad's and he wants me to have it as my first car. It only has 60,000 miles on it for a almost 10 year old car. It is practically new with a tv inside and nice rims. How much will insurance be?""

Which insurance company covers breast reduction surgery?

I currently have United Health Care and breast reduction surgery is an EXCLUSION. Has anyone had BRS and their insurance company paid for it? Which insurance company do you use?

Is aviva car insurance website down?

aviva car insurance says its unable to process your quote? Its been doing this since yesterday:s I'm just looking at quotes for different cars, just looking what will be better for me, i don't actually want to get insured yet until I've found the best price! It just keeps telling me to ring them up!! Any ideas? Oh and btw ive tried changing my email address to see if i was just doing too many but it still comes up with it? And its not because its too high for me to be insured which ive seen from looking into it because some cars ive put in again because i lost the quote reference? Nothing works:/""

Do i need to be on my parents insurance?

I am 16 and am going to get my license in a week. I have my permit already. I am going to a California DMV. My parents would like to know if I have to be on there insurance before i take my test. Also what I would have to bring besides my permit and my slip of completion of driving school. If you can please help no dumb answers.

Car insurance/ car accident?

i got into an accident i was at fault for failure to yield, my car got damaged badly she hit me going about 40 my front bumper is all smashed and my headlight fell out could cost 2500 or more my insurance is only liability, how does this work my insurance covers her vehicle and vice versa or what?""

I just found out i'm pregnant with no insurance?

I just found out I'm pregnant and don't have insurance. I live in California near the Los Angeles/ Orange County line. I am trying to find out if there are any free/low cost clinics I can go to to get checked out? Any info would be greatly appreciated.

Aren't health insurance companies allowed to sell across state lines?

I had health insurance in Texas from a company in Oklahoma. United Healthcare sells insurance in all 50 states, I believe. Why are people that are against health care reform claiming that health insurance would be cheaper if companies were allowed to sell across state lines? Also, if their claims is true, who would regulate it, the states through their insurance commissioners or the feds through a national insurance commissioner? I'm not interested in the politics of health care reform, just don't understand what people are talking about since I have had a different experience.""

Modified Car Insurance?

I'm looking for Auto insurance for my modified muscle car, but many places that claim they insure modified cars are turning me down. The car is fast, but will only be driven up to 2000 miles/year. I will not be taking it to race at the track, just driving it to events and family functions. The car's engine has been stroked, has apx. 700 horsepower, an 8pt roll cage, but has maintained most of its originality. The car is not cut up. I'm specifically looking for answers from individuals who have or have had a modified/highly modified muscle car insured. What company would you recommend and what costs should I expect to pay? Lastly, Hagarty has already turned me down... Thanks in advance.""

My daughter and car insurance?

my daughter just got a car for my granddaughter is it illegal not to have my grand daughter listed on the insurance policy..she does'nt want them to know she is a new driver...we live in new jersey

Insurance after 1st DUI?

I recently received my first and last dui. I currently have USAA and pay about 60 a month for coverage. I am 31 years old and have a clean driving record. I had a tint violation when I moved to another state.There was no accident involved with the dui. Will USAA drop me? I do know I will need SR22 once my work permit gets approved.

How much would insurance for three months cost?

I'm in a sport, wrestling, and i need insurance for at least three months soon. If you know how much insurance like that costs for a company like choc, that would be great because that's where I got it from last time, also i prefer it to be cheap""

What is the cheapest sr22 insurance in texas?

driver insurace

Will car towing service affect my future insurance quote?

I had my insurance company tow my car today(roadside assistance), will the towing service increase my future insurance quote? Thanks.""

How old do you have to be to buy insurance?

how old do you have to be to buy Business insurance?

Can you personally propose a govt. health insurance program that would satisfy the majority?

Temporary car insurance problem...Help!?

My car has to go away for repair and I don;t know how long its going to take, so I want to get insured on my parents car. Because I am still 20, I cant get temporary car insurance and the insurance policy on my parents car won't insure me as an additional driver because of my age and because the car is fairly new. Any ideas on how I can be insured on this car would be welcome, as I still need to get to and from work! Thanks.""

Does medical insurance cover circumcision surgery 18 years and over? whats the average cost?

location Corona, Ca. A Friend needs a partial circumcision. as an infant doctor did not do a complete job and partially left bottom portion. Low on cash and on medical insurance.""

Question about auto insurance?

Okay, I'm really stupid when it comes to this stuff, so don't laugh at this. I have a vehicle insured under my name. If my friend is driving it, would she be covered whether I'm present or not? Does it matter at all if she has her own auto insurance?""

Auto insurance question -- Florida?

My daughter can't really afford the insurance on her car; it's a 2003 Jetta and if she keeps it she will probably have to do a certain amount of repairs. Right now she has full coverage but is considering dropping the collision to lower the cost. If, God forbid, she should get into an accident without collision coverage, could she sue the other driver to repair or replace the car? Would she be likely to be successful? I am not hopeful of anything like that happening, believe me, but you just don't want to lose your investment especially if you have spent a lot on repairs. Thanks in advance for any insights.""

Do you need tax and insurance for little scooters?

I presume you do. I was going to buy one as a pressie for my partner who has does not have a licience. Just wondered what the costs of running a scooter was? UK only please. Thank you.

Car insurance......?

if you have full coverage car insurance and you get into an accident but its the other persons fault and you get your car fixed by your insurance do your rates go up? what if the other persons insurance pays for the damage to your car do your rates go up?

My husband needs insurance where is the best place to get it that is affordable?

My husband smokes, he has been trying to quit but unsuccsessfully and I need to geth him some insurance. I'm teetering on the low income requirements, not if you take out taxes though and he has had some medical problems in the past but mainly mental health problems. I was gonna get him insurance through my work but it would cost me 273 a month and I simply do not have that much money, I don't know how anyone does. I can barely spare $100 a month can I find insurance for him for that amount and where, I live in Kansas.""

affordable health insurance for veterans

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