#get it cuz british tea and chai????

[faterpresources]

Sᴘɪᴅᴇʀ-Mᴀɴ : Aᴄʀᴏss ᴛʜᴇ Sᴘɪᴅᴇʀ-Vᴇʀsᴇ (2023) - Pᴀʀᴛ 2

A collection of random lines compiled from the Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023) Feel free to change the pronouns in order to better suit the parts involved.

❝ Kid's an anarchist. ❞

❝ Oh, what the heck? ❞

❝ Wanna see pictures? ❞

❝ "Chai" means tea, bro! ❞

❝ You're saying "tea tea!" ❞

❝ Would I ask you for a "coffee coffee"? ❞

❝ Yeah, actually, stop talking. ❞

❝ I don't see anything, boss. ❞

❝ This guy/girl is killing me. ❞

❝ You're welcome. Shut up. ❞

❝ You never made a mistake? ❞

❝ Why don't you have 8 arms? ❞

❝ I don't believe in consistency. ❞

❝ Neither was I! I'm in the zone! ❞

❝ It's a metaphor for capitalism. ❞

❝ You disrupted a canon event. ❞

❝ Do you wanna hold my baby? ❞

❝ Oh, I thought you hated labels. ❞

❝ I told you he/she was a liability! ❞

❝ This is what I love about heists! ❞

❝ Can you not talk for a second? ❞

❝ Did you go see your little friend? ❞

❝ Wanna go easy on the penguin? ❞

❝ You're not supposed to be here! ❞

❝ Baby... you're really not helping. ❞

❝ I was gonna try and ignore you. ❞

❝ Yeah, and how did that work out? ❞

❝ Look, I know I messed up, okay?! ❞

❝ How many sweaters do you have? ❞

❝ Why does the horse need a mask? ❞

❝ I don't always like what I have to do. ❞

❝ Of course I'm right. I'm always right. ❞

❝ I've given up too much to stop now. ❞

❝ No, no, no! I did not mean it like that! ❞

❝ Oh, I'm very good at reading people. ❞

❝ That's a sports metaphor, by the way. ❞

❝ This romantic tension is so palpable! ❞

❝ You can't ask me not to save my ___. ❞

❝ Could this day get any damn weirder?! ❞

❝ How can you guys even concentrate? ❞

❝ Do you know how bad this is for you? ❞

❝ I'm coming up to get you! Here I come! ❞

❝ You weren't expecting that, were you? ❞

❝ I promise I will not let you down again. ❞

❝ I always taught you to do it by the book. ❞

❝ I'll do it, but not because you told me to. ❞

❝ I didn't know they made those for adults. ❞

❝ We are supposed to be the good guys. ❞

❝ Cuz I think it's gonna change our vibe. ❞

❝ Running is the least crazy thing going on! ❞

❝ What are you talking about? I'm helping- ❞

❝ He/She just wants to be taken seriously. ❞

❝ I have never seen him/her so emotional! ❞

❝ You blew another hole in the multiverse! ❞

❝ I know you know I've been lying to you.  ❞

❝ I had a nightmare about that once. But no! ❞

❝ Why do you wanna be a part of this stuff? ❞

❝ I don't follow orders. Neither does he/she. ❞

❝ I think maybe we got off on the wrong foot. ❞

❝ We all want to live the life we wish we had. ❞

❝ You gotta promise nothing's gonna change. ❞

❝ Look, he/she's just some villain of the week! ❞

❝ I'm not following what's happening right now. ❞

❝ Man, what does it look like I'm trying to do?! ❞

❝ You got an hour to fix this, or I can't help you. ❞

❝ Wait! You don't know what you're doing, man! ❞

❝ Actually, we need you here, for some reason. ❞

❝ Stop pretending you know what you're doing! ❞

❝ How much trouble could he/she get in tonight? ❞

❝ You realize how messed up that sounds, right? ❞

❝ And this is where the British stole all of our stuff! ❞

❝ Are you talking to him/her, or me? Or... him/her? ❞

❝ Bit of advice: use the palm, not just your fingers. ❞

❝ How many missions have you been on together? ❞

❝ What am I supposed to do? Just let him/her die?! ❞

❝ Taking a crap on the establishment. I salute you. ❞

❝ You're both equally terrible. Does that settle it? ❞

❝ I don't even know what the right thing is, anymore. ❞

❝ I'm not a role model. I was briefly a runway model. ❞

❝ Oooh, you weren't invited, and you came anyway? ❞

❝ I'm trying to hold a serious adult conversation, here. ❞

❝ Do I, uhh... have web on my face? What's the deal? ❞

❝ You and me are finally gonna live up to our potential. ❞

❝ You let him/her leave, he/she'll only do more damage. ❞

❝ I'm about to be so much more than a villain of the week. ❞

❝ You made me feel empty, like I had a hole inside of me! ❞

❝ I'll make you pay for everything you took away from me. ❞

❝ I wouldn't call it a mess. More like a... success in progress. ❞

❝ Everyone keeps telling me how my story is supposed to go. ❞

❝ If I hadn't said it before, by the way, you're a terrible mentor. ❞

❝ Come on, go easy on the kid. He/She had a terrible teacher! ❞

❝ Please, hold your questions until I'm done breaking this thing! ❞

❝ Is this where... like, you dress up like your favorite character? ❞

❝ Where's the... the bad/girl guy you were supposed to monitor? ❞

❝ I just saw where you went, and went there without you knowing. ❞

❝ Ha! I knew I was gonna regret making him/her that web shooter. ❞

❝ It's because I thought if you knew you wouldn't love me the same. ❞

❝ This should work! Or vaporize me and everything in this building. ❞

❝ Do... do you want us to do something, or do we just stand here? ❞

❝ You don't get to have a heartfelt conversation with me right now! ❞

❝ I just need enough to get me somewhere with a full-sized collider. ❞

❝ Since I leveled up my game, I'm on a journey of self-improvement! ❞

❝ I can do all these things, but I can't help the people I love the most. ❞

❝ The hardest thing about this job is you can't always save everybody. ❞

❝ Hey, you! Could you please deactivate this wonderfully strong barrier? ❞

❝ You have a choice between saving one person and saving an entire world. ❞

❝ Don't be afraid of my friend ___,he/she just looks scary. He/She's got no bite. ❞

❝ Look bad things are gonna happen. It makes us who we are.But good things happen too, you know? ❞

❝ I hate labels, I'm not a hero, 'cuz calling yourself a "hero" makes you a self-mythologizing, narcissistic autocrat. ❞

#rp meme #roleplay meme #roleplay ask meme #rp ask #ask meme #sentence starters #writing prompts #dialogue prompt #original #marvel rp #spider man #spider-man #into the spiderverse

[silence-between-seconds]

OK NOW YOUR TURN

pls pls ramble abt any niche interest you have

HELLO THANK YOU

*invokes inner history nerd* so. listen here colonizer and listen good. i will subject you to my random knowledge cuz due to youtube, undiagnosed neurodivergency and most importantly- bad jokes. i have a vari-tea of niche interests but the first thing that came to my mind was my knowledge of the history of how Indians became one of The Top Consumers of Tea.

how did this wonder-drug make its way into our masala covered hearts? what led to the fact that everyday at 4pm the word at the tip of most indians' tongues is "chai"?this is my thesis as a pro desi tea obsessed freak.

This story, like most in our history, starts with the arrival of the British. i would like to insert this picture i found in a video that i laughed at for a solid five minutes:

anyway

technically tea was invented in china, and for a very long time it was exclusively grown there. it was a very high class commodi-tea. it was considered so precious that in 1662 when king charles the second married the Portuguese princess catherine of braganza: her dowry was a chest of tea and THE ENTIRE ISLAND OF MUMBAI (then, bombay) for an annual lease of 10 pounds. let me make that clearer. THE PLACE WHERE A 1BHK HOUSE IS SO EXPENSIVE MOST PPL CANT AFFORD WAS EQUIVALENT TO THIS:

needless to say the brits was so freaking addicted man. they wanted this. so bad.

By the 18th centuary there was a war between the english and the dutch and the brit resources were down the toilet so they couldnt afford to spend all that silver on the trade of tea leaves with china. and china was uninterested in anything the white boys were offering.

UNTIL they discovered something china wanted.

✨Drugs✨

the white boys wanted that tea. and they would do anything. so they started growing opium in india (by that time they had colonized us bruh. they came into our backyard and were like "bro we're such good friends pretty please let me use ur backyard" "ok what do you want to do w it?" "i wanna grow drugs bro" "....ok" "you'll work for me no bro?" "why would i do that" "bro its ur backyard bro" "what-" *england pulls out slavery* "SHUT UP AND DO IT") (dont come at me lmao this is a very rough simplification of what happened)(imma get blocked for this?)

anyway, brits grew opium and smuggled it to china in return for TEA. FOR TEA. 40.

now after the charter act of 1833 (idk what that is exactly but basically brits lost its trade monopoly with china and so now china said we should see other people and it was an open relationship and britian got very pissed but they signed the act anyway i think)

to deal with this they established the Tea Committee (this isnt the first government board specifically for tea. there were plen-tea of others like the Tea Board Of India) which dealt w the extraction of techniques, tea seads and resources from the chinese. this was highly unsuccessful and china was not impressed. this is an example of british desperation they'll do anything at this point. (took everything in me to not insert pictures of how they treated indian farmers. it was *inhales, lets go of anger for my ancestors treatment* bad)

but in the end this qoute i found (undoubtedly by a white man) "fortune favours the white men" came tru and they got their way.

oh you thought i was done? haha babygurl i am not

in 1843 robert fortune, who was a scottish horticulturist, went on a solo trip to china to study (read as: steal) tea plantations. no actually apparently he did study cuz he published a book(i forgot the name).(yes. HIS NAME WAS ROB. FORTUNE. talk about being born for a job)

lemme insert a quick meme here:

(they actually hired him on the spot and gave the amazed man 500 pounds per annum and sent him off to china)

he was to perform what we call The Great British Tea Heist the brits had found their vigilan-tea

my guy was committed to his role and shaved his head and pretended to be a monk and after 3 months wrote a letter to his company saying "bro i got the goodssss"

lmao no this it what the letter said- "l have much pleasure in informing you," he wrote, "that I have procured a large supply of seeds and young plants which l trust will get safely to India."

NOW they finally had the greens and started planting it in india. over the years indian tea topped the market in britian as the best tea. mostly cuz the white boyz HYPED it up. they even started doing diss tracks for chinese tea. this is something read right out of an advertisment- "indian teas are more wholesome, purer, cheaper and better than chinese teas in every single way". white boyz started saying stuff like they got out of a toxic realtionship with china and a healthy one with india (but they were the toxic ones)

now brits tried to globalize indian tea to get the moneyyy~ from indians.

their first experiment with (another) government body for tea- Indian Tea Association began on the indian railways. these railways were the ancestor of the IRC-tea-C. basically they started making tea on the railway platforms. this started the trend of tea being the signature experience on every indian train journey, from the first class to economy, everyone was having it (cuz trains were introduced and quickly became popular in use). train tea was said to be better than the quality of tea in 5 star hotels. and this converted us from a nation of tea-totalers to teach addcits.

now i just have one thing to say in the end. HOW did the quality decline so badly my desi brothers and sisters? nowadays the tea on trains is basically water but brown. milk is a lie.

anyway. on the end we got it right. we took tea from the chinese and brits and we added milk and we added sugar and we got:

✨chai✨

you have reached the end. congrats.

#siri goes insane #asks #history #of tea #tea #chai #desiblr #most of these jokes were made by other people #pls dont come at me if you have heard them b4 #it is not my responsibili-tea #great britian #what were you doing #what goes on #lmao

[yehmereliyehai]

My alarm went off at 4:00am yesterday and I was groggy. I waited for H to get out of the shower then I went in and we left for D.C. at about 5:15. There was some traffic; lots of cars and busses on the road but it was moving. We stopped at a rest station to get coffee and maybe gas but the coffee place was closed (it wasn’t 7am yet) and the gas line was too long. We listened to podcasts after some quran and I said fajr hastily in the car. We called deshaz when we were about an hour way, she was planning to come with the baby- but she changed her mind when we were about 15 minutes away. We had chai and tea toast and some other britannia biscuits which were nice. A was being very awkward but I tried my best to be nice. And omg the baby was so so cute mashallah- such a little gooblu. And it was so nice seeing deshaz again. We finished our chai and then had her drop us off to the twinbrooks train station. A had given me a back-up phone charger- and for that I was very grateful- bc my battery had died.  Deshaz had given us a metrocard- that had to be reloaded and I bought another one. There weren’t lines there and we were lucky because when the train came we had a good spot to stand. The trains were packed even though we had gotten there at about 11 and everyone was there at 10 or earlier. There was a T supported and her daughter in the train and it was funny because we were all lefties. There was also a very cute baby with a pink hippo hat and she had her tongue out- but apnay sab se cute hote hain. I bought h a tote and everyone was wearing pink hats. Luckily it wasn’t sunny- it was foggy and misty and not too cold. we marched a bit and then waled in the national mall and went back and marched some more. There were so many people and it was interesting to see all of the creative signs. People handed out free buttons (I bought one) and signs as well but I think we missed most of those. There was a woman who gave h and me a sticker than said resist!. It was something to see- but we couldn’t hear any of the speeches- which is what I really wanted to hear. But nonetheless at about 2:30 I told h i wanted to go to the museum to see the q exhibit and she finally agreed. So we walked far and finally found it after seeing that 2 entrances were closed. It was beautiful and there was a q bigger than a twin size bed! and then we colored and had a moment of peace. so nice. Then we walked some more and saw thousands more people. It was crazy. Some guy was selling russian-english dictionaries because he said that Putin was coming and some police officer wouldn’t make eye contact with me when we asked for directions and some other british guy was selling flags and stopped me and h to talk about what we thought was going on. 

When we finally go to the station, on one side people we selling make A great again material and on the other some guy was screaming dump trump. It was surreal. We go a train and then finally deshaz picked us up (A had a headache). I saw tusso (loved it- saw sh memon but didn’t recognize each other) and then we went for halal thai (it was so fresh!) There was a thai women who was the owner and she was super cute. We gave Y a piece of naan to chew on. Then we went back to the apt and deshaz asked me if i wanted to see the cuz r and I said hah no. And I had some more chai and then we left for home. We got gas and ate corn nuts and h was asleep most of the way. I stopped for a 30 min rest. Then we went home and I sped into bed without even saying salam to anyone. I rushed through all of my namazain. and missed fajr today. Anyways. That was that. It was memorable.

#1222017 #chand