#his own brother spent most of Inuyasha’s life trying to kill him

[avionvadion]

For someone who’s writing a fic centered around Sesshomaru x OC I sure do like to put Inuyasha under a microscope to prod at his brain to figure out what’s going on in there.

(Anyways, here’s my favorite paragraph from Inuyasha’s POV from the most recent chapter.)

"He knew what it was like to lose a loved one. He knew what it was like to lose someone he thought he could trust. He knew what it was like to love and not trust, and to have that love and distrust thrown back in his face. He knew what it was like to love and lose, because he had done it several times before, and each time was more painful than the last. His entire childhood was spent running and hiding in fear, trying desperately to stay alive, because all he had known had left him and the world was intent on getting rid of him too."

(Also an excerpt from Sango’s POV because I love her and there’s something very important near the end of it.)

Lifting her gaze, Sango turned to stare at Inuyasha again- the boy chancing a glance at her out of the corner of his eye, over his shoulders. To the demon slayer, who had been informed how badly Sesshōmaru had treated him in the past, and had seen them fight at least once, Inuyasha looked like a frightened dog.

He was afraid.

Not for Irene, who- deep down- he knew was alive, but of the idea that Sesshōmaru had somehow changed. The person he despised more than anything, perhaps even more than Naraku himself.

Sango remembered all too clearly the way Inuyasha had lashed out at Irene before when she said she didn’t hate Sesshōmaru. When she said she had actually felt safe with him. The idea that Sesshōmaru could have had a change of heart, and was no longer the ruthless demon Inuyasha grew up with- grew up avoiding, grew up trying to survive against- was… terrifying to him. It was like the world he thought he understood was coming crashing down around him.

Because if Sesshōmaru’s heart actually changed for the better, if he was actually going out of his way to save Irene- Inuyasha’s friend- then that meant Inuyasha would have to feel gratitude towards him. One of his best friends would be alive because of the half-brother that had so-often wanted him dead.

But… that doesn’t erase the past.

Sango wonders if Inuyasha realizes that. If he knows that, just because Sesshōmaru has the capacity to care now and even cares about one of their friends, it doesn’t mean the scars of the past will vanish. Inuyasha is still allowed to hate him. He’s allowed to hold a grudge.

Sesshōmaru had been awful to him.

Just because there will be gratitude to the demon lord for saving Irene, that doesn’t mean Inuyasha has to forgive him.

“Inuyasha…” The bloodied mask felt heavy in Sango’s hand, but she didn’t set it down. Her features shifted into something gentler, yet still so very sad. “It’s okay.”

The half-demon said nothing.

“It’s okay to hate Sesshōmaru.”

His feelings are completely valid on this matter. Forgiveness is a gift, not an obligation, and Inuyasha does not have to give it if he does not choose so.

#he’s such a complex character. like he doesn’t seem to at first glance but if you actually DELVE into it? #boy’s a tsundere but like onky because he’s been THROUGH some shit #he was bullied by humans and hunted down by demons. his mother and only supporter died when he was a child #his own brother spent most of Inuyasha’s life trying to kill him #when he finally learned to love again he couldn’t TRUST and then had that love and distrust thrown back at him in the worst way possible #and ended up bound to a tree for fifty years before a girl identical to the one who pinned him there woke him up #and then he learned to love AND trust. but then becomes so very afraid of losing everything all over again #so he tries to keep his new friends at a distance but fails because they’re stubborn and affectionate and LOVE him for who he is #and now the brother who hates him and tried several times to kill him is raising a HUMAN??? He ADOPTED a human???? #in this essay I will- #Inuyasha #Sesshomaru #kagome higurashi #his tsundere-ness is like a defense mechanism and it HURTS ME but like in a good way #sango #lord sesshoumaru #Sesshomaru x oc

[boycottyashahime]

Hello! Anti-Sessrin person here. You said if this couple becomes canon it will ruin Sesshomaru's character development. I would love it If you could elaborate on that because you're always so eloquent and smart. It's ok if you don't feel like it, though. Have a nice day!

I've actually been looking for an excuse to sit down and write out a cohesive post on my thoughts about this. Contrary to what the shippers want to believe, my interpretation of Sesshoumaru and Rin's relationship doesn't have anything to do with my moral objections to child grooming. I happen to think there's plenty of evidence for a filial interpretation in the text.

First, I'd like to preface my little essay here by saying I'm going off the manga alone. I haven't seen the anime in a long time, because I dropped it when I got a little tired of trying to reconcile the inconsistencies between the two mediums. So, if you read this and have an impulse to say, "hey, what about that thing in episode such-and-such...", keep in mind that I probably just don't remember what you're thinking of.

So, let's go back, alllll the way back, to Sesshoumaru's first appearance. Here's a guy who tears off a dude's head for no other reason than to get the attention of his subordinates to demand a boat. Here's a guy who's spent a long time looking just about EVERYWHERE for his father's remains, not to pay respects, but to plunder them. Here's a guy who feels ENTITLED to rob his dad's grave for treasure he deserves simply for being his father's son.

Sesshoumaru begins his journey as a selfish, spoiled, entitled brat. He doesn't fit the usual profile of a kid throwing a tantrum on the street because he wants the expensive toy sitting in the window; he's very posh and very reserved, but fundamentally, his motivation comes down to the simple fact that he wants Tessaiga. It doesn't even really have anything to do with respect and admiration of his father, otherwise he wouldn't have been so eager to rifle through dear old dad's bones to get at a sword when he had another heirloom right there at his hip. Only Tessaiga was representative of the sheer destructive force he wanted to wield, so he ignored the fact that his dad didn't seem to want him to have it.

This is important, because at first, Sesshoumaru doesn't seem to think of his father in terms of the guy's intentions or the steps he takes for the sake of his sons. Like most rich spoiled kids, Sesshoumaru views the Inu no Taishou in terms of his prestige and how that priviledge can be appropriated for selfish ends. Sesshoumaru wants Tessaiga not because he needs it, but because it's a birthright, and reinforces his legitimacy. When it's clear that Tessaiga seals Inuyasha's youkai blood, keeps him from going berserk, Sesshoumaru loses interest in Tessaiga - it's just a crutch for Inuyasha, and there's no prestige in taking it from him or using it for himself.

Sesshoumaru doesn't start to REALLY consider his father's intentions for the swords until later in the manga, when it comes out that Tenseiga was originally part of Tessaiga, and Inuyasha was meant to get the Meidou Zangetsuha attack eventually as well. It's at this point that Sesshoumaru starts to question if daddy actually HATED him, to give him a rather neat power disguised in a lame shell, but only to develop it so Inuyasha can have it instead, even after Inuyasha already got Tessaiga in the first place. It kind of looks to Sesshoumaru that Inuyasha gets all the powerful cool shit their father left behind, and that there might have been some favoritism coming down HARD on Inuyasha's side.

Above, you can see Sesshoumaru has two interlinked but distinct issues that are addressed throughout the story - his lack of compassion and empathy, and how tied his identity is to his father's favor and prestige. These two are somewhat separated in the narrative; there's a kind of pause in Sesshoumaru's development while a bulk of the middle of the story deals more with other characters and their development, but there is a little bit of a thematic connection between the two halves.

We'll start with the development of Sesshoumaru's compassion since, well, that's where the story begins working on his character. Right before Rin shows up, Toutousai let's Inuyasha's group in on the sword Sesshoumaru carries around and what it does, indicating that Tenseiga requires a compassionate heart to function. A bit ham-handed, but RT isn't very subtle most of the time, so we'll allow it. This sets up the next few scenes in which Sesshoumaru is unable to move and must play captive audience to a little girl doing the literal opposite of what he's used to. Sesshoumaru's habit is to show up and kill things, with no thought to the years of history, relationships, thoughts, emotions, etc that he's snuffing out. But while he's reclined injured in the woods, Rin demonstrates actual LIFE and the preservation of it, that part Sesshoumaru never gets to see. It's made all the starker by how BAD Rin is at caring for herself, let alone the strange monster she found in the woods. She does exactly nothing to help Sesshoumaru, despite how hard she tries, and is even injured by others in her attempts. She is the very picture of vulnerability, the opposite of the strong and capable Sesshoumaru.

This is a stark contrast, because anything less wouldn't be enough to create the necessary awareness of Rin's struggles that Sesshoumaru needs in order to use Tenseiga on here. And I know I've said this before, but I really cannot stress enough how obvious I think the symbolism is when Sesshoumaru uses Tenseiga for the first time; a phallic object gives life to a child, and the object's owner looks after that life throughout the rest of the story. He's not very good at looking after it, and it's clear that he's not sure about taking responsibility for Rin at first, because she pleaded for him to come back for her when he and Jaken left her behind to requisition a sword from Gaijinbou. To me, it's reminiscent of a teenager who knocked someone up, and ended up having to learn to give a crap about the result.

But, even if you don't accept that symbolism as particularly significant, Rin being a child, and human, and weak, unable to survive on her own, are important characteristics to how Sesshoumaru's compassion develops. Sesshoumaru is one of the strongest characters in the series, and he rarely has to worry about his own safety. And since he's in the habit of just murdering everyone he comes across if they're in his way, he's never had to worry about the safety of anyone else, either. When Rin comes into the picture, though, Sesshoumaru is faced with the uncomfortable reality of vulnerability in general. Through her earnest and incompetent attempts to foster survival in a world that can and does crush her, she's opened his eyes to how the disadvantaged, those without a powerful youkai lineage to rely on, have to struggle.

Rin herself has nothing to offer Sesshoumaru within this context of supreme vulnerability. She's not a friend, because she can't offer mutual support or use a skill to their benefit as a team. She's not a lover, because, well, she's a child and sexual/romantic attraction are conditions that wouldn't allow Sesshoumaru to extend his compassion beyond just her. As a mostly helpless kid, Rin has to rely upon Sesshoumaru and his power to survive, and Sesshoumaru employs his strength to keep her alive, getting nothing but a sweet smile out of it all. She gets all the benefits, he has all the obligations. This is PURE compassion - using one's advantages to another's benefit because you care about them, and not because you derive something from it as well.

This is why making Rin into Sesshoumaru's lover is a REALLY thoughtless take. It puts conditions on the compassion and muddies the message.

Moving onto Sesshoumaru's continued character development in the latter part of the story, the sword drama starts back up with slow, when Toutousai shows up and offers to reforge Tenseiga into a weapon. Sesshoumaru discovers that because he got angry enough to break his primary weapon in defense of Kagura's honor, he's triggered the next evolution of Tenseiga into something that can murder. Which is what he wanted at the beginning, yay! I want to point out here that Toutousai says Tenseiga noticed a change in Sesshoumaru's heart - anger for the first time for the sake of another. This implies that what Jaken said about Sesshoumaru getting tangled up in the fight against Naraku because Naraku kidnapping and using Rin to manipulate Sesshoumaru hurt Sesshoumaru's pride is actually accurate; he just really hated the thought of Naraku trying to use him, even if it was a failed attempt.

After going through HELL to develop the Meidou into a full circle (literally), Sesshoumaru then learns that the Meidou belongs to Tessaiga and Inuyasha, and that it's supposed to be handed over. Now, part of Sesshoumaru's angst over this idea, I think, is not just "did daddy love Inuyasha more?", but also the assumption that Inuyasha would have to KILL him in order to retake the Meidou Zangetsuha into Tessaiga. Thinking that your father meant for your little brother to kill you at some point to take your stuff is a pretty disturbing thought, to be entirely fair to him. This is why, when Sesshoumaru jumps into the meidou to take back control of the Naraku-possessed Tenseiga and breaks it deliberately, he spends the rest of the time in there moodily resigned to disappear. He genuinely believes that his father meant for him to die at this point, and even after they get out of there, he seems genuinely depressed.

This is Sesshoumaru's lowest point as a character. He's lost something he thought his father had meant for him, at his father's own wish, and he can't help but question why his dad would give him something just to take it away and give it to Inuyasha. It looks for all the world like favoritism, and since the Inu no Taishou is dead, there's no asking him what the hell the meaning of all this is.

This is all leading to one of the most infuriatingly ridiculous scenes I have ever seen in a manga - when Magatsuhi has crushed Sesshoumaru and everyone thinks he's been killed/absorbed, Magatsuhi is blown apart and rendered unable to reform by the shiny new sword clutched in Sesshoumaru's newly regrown arm. I could talk your ear off about how having Sesshoumaru stop being an amputee is erasure of consequences for his actions, or how being given back an arm is kind of a slap in the face for actual amputees, and where the mother f*ck did that sword come from anyway, but that's not what this essay is about, so I'll just keep all that to myself. The point of this is articulated by Toutousai when he says that Sesshoumaru had to let go of Tessaiga and his father's heirloom to stand on his own as a daiyoukai.

We've already gone over how Sesshoumaru is one of the most powerful characters in the series, who rarely has to worry about his well-being. He's just really strong without having to try. Sesshoumaru had already learned that he didn't need Tessaiga ages ago - he knew this when he learned that Inuyasha needed Tessaiga to keep from tearing himself apart eventually. But when he thought he had been passed down something from his father that was truly meant to be his, only to put all this work into it so that Inuyasha could have it, that embittered him again. It's not that he wanted the sword necessarily, but the thoughts and consideration of his father, who seemed to be putting everything he had into Inuyasha.

But his previous experiences protecting and considering someone (in some cases, multiple someones) weaker than him should have tipped him off. During the very battle in which he got his new arm and sword, he was actively helping those around him avoid Magatsuhi and keeping them close because he had a plan and the strength to carry it out. He was willing to take the extra step to protect Inuyasha and friends before trying to take care of Magatsuhi though, and that was the point. He put everyone else's needs ahead of his own, even Inuyasha's, and he did it without even thinking.

Toutousai just articulated what Sesshoumaru should have already intuitively known by that point. He never needed his father's heirlooms, the swords, his dad's power. They were unnecessary for him from the start. Inuyasha needed a leg up, because his own BODY could kill him after a while. But Sesshoumaru always had the capability of being great on his own. He just needed to finally separate his ego from who his father was and become his own person; stand on his own as a great youkai. While I don't agree with the execution, I can get behind the big lesson - don't rely on your daddy's wealth and influence to prop you up, and do the work to build a personality and identity of your own.

Which is ANOTHER reason why making Rin into a lover would be a thoughtless take. It would walk back Sesshoumaru's final lesson about being his own person apart from his father.

So, there you go. A comprehensive post regarding my take on Sesshoumaru's character development. I could add in a bit about Sesshoumaru coming to understand his father's consideration and the lengths he went to for the sake of protecting Inuyasha by having to give similar consideration to Rin, but I think this post is long enough, and that one statement on that aspect pretty much sums it up. Let me know if you would like me to elaborate on any of this, or if you would like to argue any of the points, I'm up for it. Might take me a minute to respond, mind you, but hopefully it won't take as long as it did to draft this behemoth.

Take care.

#inuyasha #rin (inuyasha) #sesshomaru #sesshoumaru #character analysis #character development analysis #i pulled out all the stops for this one #anti sessrin #i know this doesn't match the perfect prince characterization Sesshoumaru usually gets #but i just calls it as i sees it

[chenoehi]

Thoughts on Ep. 15: Koga, Moroha, Zero, Riku, and Kirinmaru

First, now that good boy Koga is back in the game, a fun theory/headcanon I’ve had is that Moroha’s sword is actually Koga’s sword—you know the one he always carries around but never uses? They look the same as far as I can tell, and I noticed that immediately in addition to the other hints she was raised by the wolves (which I think most of us suspected, but it’s lovely to have it confirmed). That or the sword came from the wolf tribe at least, it resembles the kind of sword Ayame has, too. With the confirmation of Ep. 15 this theory is now becoming more likely.

Also, I just have to say that as devastating as it is that Kagome and Inuyasha did not get to raise their daughter and that they felt betrayed by Sesshomaru after coming to trust him (I absolutely believe he is helping them, not hurting them), it is comforting knowing that Koga had a hand in raising their daughter. He loved Kagome and treated well, having so much affection and respect for her by the end. He even showed some compassion for Inuyasha (in his own way). You can say he became their friend rather than simply being their ally. The fact that they trusted him to protect their child speaks volumes. And did you see how proud he looked when Hachi brought her to the tribe? Moroha is not his child but you know he will treat her like one. We don’t know the details yet of who raised her exactly or how she came to be separated from the wolves, but I have full confidence that Ayame and Koga treat Moroha like their own.

I know some people are sad that Miroku and Sango did not raise her, but knowing the threat against her and that their human friends already had a young family to take care of, it makes sense they would want to hide her away. And although it would have been perfect if Moroha could have lived in the barrier and been safe with her cousins (and possibly Rin), but again we’re not sure of the details yet.

Obviously, Inuyasha knew of the threat against Moroha’s life from Kagome who learned about it from Riku (a comment on that in a minute). I think the swiftness of everything and Moroha’s being sent away rather than being protected behind a barrier like the twins may be due to how immediate the threat became once Kirinmaru was awoken.

What’s unclear is 1. how long after Moroha’s birth is she whisked away? 2. why did they go somewhere specific to confront the maru bros and send their child away? 3. why would they delay sending her away in the first place (they had to with Kagome being there, and also Moroha’s hair is a little longer than the twins at birth so maybe this indicates it wasn’t immediate, or maybe not)? 4. if they delayed sending her because they just found out Kirinmaru had been awoken (by Zero) then who told them? Sesshomaru? 5. if so, did Sesshomaru tell them he had a plan or ask them to trust him while also explaining where to meet and that they needed to send Moroha away? 6. did Koga and co. know that Moroha was coming to them? They don’t seem very surprised, mostly just happy/pleased to see her, but also like they were expecting her. I don’t know how they would have gotten a message to them, but maybe they sent word to the wolves alerting them to the danger and the possibility that they may have to send Moroha away, Koga may have agreed to care for her, and when the time came to follow through they already knew to expect her.

Riku though...

Oh Riku. Seriously what the fuck. I thought I knew where this was going but..I’m trying to justify how Riku is introduced the same episode that we see Kirinmaru in the flesh. They are both shown eating grapes in their introductory scene. They both spit said grapes out and make some similar comments, showing that they have similar ideals and mannerisms (even if it is just grapes we’re talking about). They both are associated with water. They both are on boats a lot. Riku is referred to as a pirate washed up on shore or lost, trying to find his ship, etc. All the characters (human and demon) refer to him as lord or -sama. Kyuki (a peril) knew him. He has a personal grudge against the perils. The perils serve Kirinmaru. They both have green eyes (not a human eye color in feudal era Japan or even modern day Japan). They both have red hair (same comment). Riku is clearly shown to have some control over the pearls or ability to use them that might possibly exist in tandem with other abilities he possesses.

Riku also kind of just revealed himself to be something other than human in Ep. 15 when he commented that 18 years passing was nothing to him as we see visibly that he has the same appearance in present day as he had the year that the cousins were born. Could be that he means time itself means nothing to him because he can travel through time but that’s still unclear. Conclusion is that Riku is Kirinmaru’s hanyo child as he’s clearly not human but does not appear to be full demon either and has obvious visual connections to both Kirinmaru and Zero.

BUT. Kirinmaru doesn’t appear to have any love of humans like his doggy counterparts. He practically looks like he’s about to have a stroke when he hears that Sesshomaru married a human and sired hanyo heirs. It’s hard to imagine that person has a hanyo child floating around who everyone is aware of. However, he does seem to be contemplating something beyond what Zero is telling him and if he does have a hanyo child then he could be realizing that he potentially created a being that will kill him.

Another thing that is bothering me is how Riku warned Kagome. Obviously everything about that and Riku himself is shady af and we have no idea what’s going on yet, but what’s interesting to me is that Kirinmaru doesn’t realize that hanyous are a threat to him until Zero points it out—which is months after the comet when Moroha is born. Of course, this is all assuming that the moment Kirinmaru is awoken by Zero comes after Moroha has been born and not before. It is possible that Zero awoke Kirinmaru immediately after the twins were born and that Kirinmaru spent some time plotting but that’s kind of illogical. Why wait to kill a child until after it’s born if you can just kill the mother? Which then makes it even more sus that Zero waits to wake him up and tell him this. It’s also sus how Zero warns Sesshomaru of the threat on his daughters’ lives (the threat she’s making) only to send Jokka after them as a pawn before biding her time until after Moroha is born to then conveniently and casually point out to her brother that all half and quarter demons are a threat to him.

Zero’s movements make little sense until we have a better understanding of what’s motivating her and why the timing of everything was so important. I’m not leaving the possibility of her betraying Kirinmaru off the table honestly. Something’s not right. I have this feeling that Kirinmaru is just being used. I know he’s still supposed to be the villain and he does try to kill the girls (eventually) but something is very wrong. And Zero’s comment that she expected Sesshomaru to protect his children with a barrier...if she expected that to happen then why didn’t she attack when it would have been unexpected? Why didn’t she try anything when Rin was still pregnant? Wouldn’t that be devastating to lose your wife and two unborn children? Why the cloak and dagger? It seems that she’s purposefully trying to pit Kirinmaru against Sesshomaru, but she’s also not hiding her hatred of Sesshomaru and his whole family either.

This episode kind of further reinforces the Riku is a time traveler theory because Riku knows Kagome is pregnant when she’s not even showing and he warns her about Kirinmaru although at this time Kirinmaru doesn’t even know hanyous are a threat. In fact, he seems confident that the InuTaisho’s sons took care of the comet. He shows no inclination of wanting Inuyasha dead.

But one thing that’s bothering me is just how shook Kirinmaru is that Sesshomaru has a human wife and hanyo babies. He’s shook shook. Like, blindsided. Everyone but Myoga so far has taken the news with little reaction (to be fair, we’re not sure how the OG gang felt but Kohaku wasn’t in utter disbelief as far as I remember). Maybe that’s just because he knew Sesshomaru for a long time and he really can’t believe it, but I have this feeling we saw his reaction being a bit overblown (and honestly, kind of undignified) for a reason. Something clearly went down between Zero, Toga, Sesshomaru’s mother, and possibly involving Sesshomaru as well. Kirinmaru seemed to have made peace with Toga and he doesn’t appear to be on adversarial terms with his son, but something is wrong. Everything feels very personal, like somehow Sesshomaru marrying a human and siring children with her is an insult to Kirinmaru personally. If he already knew about the hanyo threat by that point it would make sense but no dice, so then why.

Also, if Osamu Kirin is in fact Kirinmaru in human disguise, wouldn’t he save himself a lot of trouble by just killing Towa in the Reiwa period when he had the chance? It’s not like she was hiding her presence, she didn’t even know she was a hanyo. So if that theory is true, did he choose to leave her alone for a reason or has he suffered memory loss? We already know Kirinmaru in the fuedal era was a little off so it’s not a stretch.

#yashahime #yashahime princess half demon #princess half demon #hanyo no yashahime #hanyou no yashahime #sesshomaru #Kirinmaru #Riku yashahime #riku the pirate #Riku #zero #zero yashahime #Koga #Koga inuyasha #inuyasha #Kagome #Moroha #yashahime theory #not bts #anime

[mamabearcatfanfics]

Instinct - Chapter 5

I’m posting this a little early, but I need to take my youngest to the park, attend the Inuyasha Book Club meeting, do laundry ready for the school week and finish writing other things, and I didn’t want it to get forgotten in the general Sunday madness!

You can read it on AO3, or continue on below 😘

Kagome did her best not to panic as the ambulance door slammed shut. She tried to listen to the slow deep voice of the paramedic explaining what he was doing, slightly muffled by the surgical mask he’d donned as soon as Inuyasha had laid her down on the bed and jumped down out of the ambulance. The paramedics hands were steady, his voice calm, and she tried to focus on watching him as he wrote down numbers on a chart and twisted dials on equipment .

Mama’s hand reached out to stroke her leg over the white sheet that had been pulled up to her waist, and Kagome closed her eyes, concentrating on the familiarity of Mama’s soothing voice and touch in the jarring interior of the brightly lit ambulance. But she felt adrift without him.

Strange as it may seem, she’d come to take comfort in the predictability of Inuyasha’s abrasive personality. It had taken her a while, but over the emotionally charged months that they’d spent together, eating, sleeping, laughing, fighting, she’d worked out that it was all a front. It was hardly surprising really, that he would build up emotional armour in response to his hard and lonely childhood. But he’d begun to gradually let that front slip as the trust between them built, at first offering grudging friendship, and now she hoped, something more.

Over these last few days as he’d cared for her, he’d allowed his true personality to shine through, and he’d become her lifeline, her one point of stablity in the pervasive fog of pain and fever. Inuyasha had promised he’d follow, and he never broke his promises. That was the only thing holding her together. Because she’d heard the second paramedic say the name of the place where they were going – the hospital where her father had died.

 She’d been seven – a happy little girl with no concept of how cruel life could be. Her father was late coming home from work, and all she’d been concerned about was whether he’d arrive home in time to read her a bed time story, because he did the voices better than Mama. But the familiar sound of his key turning in the lock never came. An unfamiliar knock on the front door at that time of night was jarring, breaking the usual evening family routine. It had surprised them all.

 When Mama opened the door, instead of her father’s smiling face there had been police, their faces sombre. They said there had been an accident. Mama was crying. Grandpa had stroked Mama’s arm while she stood behind them, unsure of what was going on. She tried her best to cling to Mama’s waist, but Mama’s stomach was now so full of her yet to be born baby brother that she couldn’t make her arms meet. The kind police lady had tried to take her hand, but she didn’t want a stranger, she wanted Mama and Papa. Mama never cried and Kagome was terrified.

 The police had driven them to the hospital, and she’d sat on the back seat, squashed in between Mama and Jiji, holding their hands tightly, the city lights going past in a blur. She hadn’t known what to think, what to say. There had to have been some kind of mistake that would be cleared up when they got there.

 They were told that they’d only be allowed in the ICU ward for a few minutes. The ward had felt alien, like another planet, the large open space filled with machines and curtains and beeps and whispers. Strangers with masks passed by them, with shoes that squeaked on the grey rubber flooring. The room stank of bleach, reminding her of when Mama had to clean up after Buyo’s little accidents when he was a kitten.

 Jiji had held her hand tightly as they walked past other patients, telling her softly that she must be careful not to touch anything, and that she had to be brave. She wanted to be brave, wanted Jiji to be proud, but she was scared, more scared than she’d ever been.

 And then they’d stopped at a bed at the end of the ward. She hadn’t wanted to believe that man in the bed was her father. He was completely unrecognisable, his chest and one arm covered in dressings and bandages, with more bandages wrapped around his head. He had tubes coming out of one arm, and a plastic mask with tubes coming out of it over his face. He wasn’t wearing the clothes he’d left the house in that morning, or the watch Mama had got him for his birthday.

 Mama’s shaking fingers had reached out to stroke the man’s unbandaged hand, so softly, like she was worried he would break more if she wasn’t careful. But that couldn’t be right. Her Papa was strong. Strong enough to throw her high into the air at the park. Strong enough to pick up Mama and whirl her around the kitchen until she giggled. Strong enough to help Jiji lift heavy things onto high shelves in the store room that she couldn’t even move.

 She’d told her mother quietly but clearly that the police had made a mistake, and they should go home. This was some other little girl’s Papa, and her Papa would be home any minute, wondering where his dinner was.

 Then her ears were filled with the frightening sound of her Mama’s anguished voice calling out Papa’s name. Nurses came running, drawn by the sudden beeps and alarms of the machines near the bed. Jiji had picked her up and taken her out of the way as she cried out for Mama, taken her back through the big room and down a narrow corridor.

 She’d sat with Jiji in a waiting room that smelt like sadness, with a tv that only showed one channel. There was a toybox, but the toys were all for babies. She flicked through a half filled colouring book that sat on a little table for something to do while they waited for Mama, but the crayons in the plastic tub next to it were all broken, with most of the pretty colours missing.

 It wasn’t Mama that came to get them, but a doctor. He’d asked them to follow him to a little room close by, refusing to answer Jiji’s questions until they’d gone inside and he’d shut the door. It was a small depressing space, with faded artwork hanging askew on the wall, empty apart from a few chairs and a table with a box of tissues on it. Mama was already there, crumpled in on herself like crushed paper, her face buried in her arms to muffle the sound of her crying.

 The doctor had said he was sorry, but there was nothing they could do – Papa’s injuries from the car accident had been too severe. The words had whooshed over her like an icy breeze. She didn’t want them to be true, and she’d frantically looked at Mama and Jiji’s faces in turn, wanting one of them to say that the doctor was wrong. How could those words be true, when he’d patted her on the head just this morning, and told her to do her best at school? Told her that he hoped she’d have a good day, and he’d see her tonight?

 But Mama was still crying, her hands reaching out blindly for them both. Jiji had turned and collapsed onto the chair next to Mama, his own face ashen. Then he’d picked her up and rocked her on his lap, even though he usually said she was getting too big to be cuddled like a baby now that she was almost a big sister.

Shocked tears had begun to pour down her cheeks, even as she felt Jiji’s tears dripping on to her neck, and Mama’s soft hands pulling her legs to rest on the small amount of lap she had left, stroking her softly as she tried to comfort her with broken words. And then she knew it was true. Papa was gone. It had been an accident, but that accident had taken her Papa away as surely as if someone had killed him on purpose.

Now they were going back to that same hospital ten years later, and she didn’t know how she felt about that. Part of her felt like that same petrified little girl, stepping into an unknown world. It was so hard to focus. Her mind was swimming, the constant fight for air was making her feel panicky, like she needed to run away. And her chest hurt so much lying down. She tugged on the paramedic’s arm weakly, trying to sit up.

“Is your pain worse when you’re laying on your back?” he asked, making adjustments to the bed when she nodded. “Sorry about that – I didn’t quite get the bed set up properly before your boyfriend carried you in. We’re nearly at the hospital Kagome-san. Deep breaths – let the oxygen mask help you.” Her brain tucked the word ‘boyfriend’ away to think about later, when she wasn’t struggling to breathe.

The ambulance pulled to a stop and the back doors opened. Someone helped Mama step down, and she was startled when the paramedic clicked a safety belt across her waist and her bed started to move, jolting her slightly as the legs extended to the ground and locked into place. Everything was a blur.

Large sliding doors swished open and she was wheeled into a small room, unable to see everything from her position on the bed. A nurse was taking her temperature, taking her blood pressure, talking to Mama and the paramedics, asking her questions, but she couldn’t answer, her breath wheezing behind the mask on her face.

The urge to run grew even greater, so much so that she half sat up and tried to swing her legs off the bed, but the belt still around her waist held her back. The nurse tried to restrain her arms gently, telling her to be calm, that she was safe. But she didn’t feel safe at all! She wanted to leave. A feeling of claustrophobia swept over her as she struggled to free her arms, her chest heaving as her body tried to breathe and cough at the same time. And then his voice cut through the static fogging her brain.

“Kagome. It’s gonna be okay sweet girl. Deep breaths, remember?”

People were arguing in the background, commenting on Inuyasha’s lack of mask and shoes, and Mama was saying something, trying to smooth things over, but none of that mattered to Kagome. He’d promised he’d be there and he was. Her hand shot out to grasp his fingers tightly, and she lay back weakly on the pillow, no longer struggling to run.

“Inuyasha…”

“Promised I’d be here didn’t I?” Kagome nodded, taking in gasps of air behind the mask, squeezing his fingers, her eyes locked on his. Inuyasha stroked his thumb over her wrist. “You gonna be good and take your medicine?”

“Please don’t leave again”, she wheezed, her eyes filling with sudden tears.

“Keh. Wasn’t plannin’ on it.” His other hand reached up to smooth her fringe back, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear, his face and voice a point of calm as the medical professionals bustled around her. “Just lay quietly, that’s my good girl. I’m here, and I’m not goin’ anywhere else.”

💕

Inuyasha’s nose twitched behind the surgical mask they’d insisted he wear. Even though he disliked the feel of it against his face, it actually blocked out some of the scents that had irritated him so much when he first arrived, making him feel like he constantly needed to sneeze. Besides, they’d said if he wanted to stay in the hospital room at Kagome’s side it was essential, so he put up with it.

Mama had tied the strings on the mask on for him, over the top of his bandana, and had somehow found some hospital slippers for him to slip onto his feet, because apparently him being barefoot was also an issue. They were now both sitting beside Kagome’s bed, watching her as she slept.

His heart was full of gratitide. Thankful for Mama, who had made it clear to the healers that he was family and she wanted him to stay. Thankful that she had somehow found a way to explain things to him without making him feeling totally useless and stupid. Thankful for the medicine that was allowing Kagome to finally sleep, a proper sleep for the first time in days.

She’d been asleep for a few hours now. The nurse kept coming in and poking and prodding her, making him want to snarl at them to leave her be, but her eyes remained closed, her breathing still congested, but steady. Her face was still pale under the breathing mask, but it had finally lost that expression of constant pain and panic that had made him feel frantic over the last few days.

He really hadn’t paid much attention as Mama had spoken to the doctor after they’d got the results of all the tests. The phrase ‘viral pneumonia’ meant virtually nothing to him, but they’d said that Kagome was responding to the medication, and would probably start feeling better in a few days, seeing she was young and healthy, providing she took her medicine and allowed her body to rest and heal.

Before they’d given her the sleeping medicine, a nurse had come in to show Kagome how to cough effectively to help get rid of all the mucous in her lungs, and to show him and Mama how they could help her. Kagome had told the nurse proudly that Inuyasha had already been doing that for her, her eyes glowing as she gazed at him, and he’d felt his heart swell and his cheeks flush as all three women gazed at him approvingly.

He’d quelled his sudden urge to smash the window and leap out of it to avoid the sudden unwanted attention, but only just. He understood it would cause problems for Kagome and Mama and it wasn’t worth the momentary reprieve from the embarrassment. He was proud to think that what had come to him instinctually had actually been helpful, but that didn’t mean he wanted people talking about it, and looking at him.

“Inuyasha?” Mama’s voice was gentle and quiet, and had lost that sharp edge of panic that it had contained ever since he’d come through the well and told her that Kagome was ill, and he was glad.

“Mmm?” he replied, his eyes never leaving Kagome’s sleeping face.

“Now that Kagome is resting comfortably, I was thinking of getting something to eat from the cafeteria downstairs before it closes. Will you stay here with her for me? I could bring something back for you to eat if you like?”

“Course I’ll stay.” He thought for a moment. “Do ya think they’d have ramen? Or those po-ta-to crunchy things in the crinkly bag?” Mama stood, reaching for her handbag with one hand and stroking his shoulder affectionately with the other.

“I’ll see what I can do. I won’t be long. Don’t go roaming around the hospital while I’m gone, okay?”

“Feh. I'm not goin' anywhere. Why would I leave Kagome unprotected like that when she’s asleep?” He reached his hand out to stroke Kagome’s fingers resting on top of the blanket, so softly, like he was worried she would break if he wasn’t careful. Mama made a small sound behind him, and he turned his head curiously. The paper mask on his face seemed to be messing with his senses, because Mama’s scent seemed to be both sad and happy all at once.

“I’m so glad she has you Inuyasha” she said quietly, with a little hitch in her voice. And with that she turned quickly, moving out of the room and down the corridor.

“I’m glad I have you too.” Kagome’s voice was still raspy, but her eyes were clear, and he could see her smile beneath the plastic mask.

“Oi. You’re meant to be sleepin’. Quit talkin’ and close your eyes.”

“I’m awake now.” She tried to pull herself upwards, reaching for the strap that hung over the bed, but Inuyasha was too fast. In moments he’d helped her sit up, letting her lean forward against his strong arm while he tucked pillows behind her back like he’d seen the nurse do earlier.

“Thank you Inuyasha. Thank you for looking after me.” Her fingers stroked his hand, then twined their fingers together, her thumb caressing his wrist. She was looking at him with so much emotion in her eyes, he could hardly stand it.

Out of habit, all the usual words to push any contact away popped reflectively into his mind, but they stuck in his throat, and he swallowed them down. He didn’t need them anymore. Not with her. Not with Kagome. He tipped his head forward so their foreheads were resting against each other.

“I’ll always look after you my sweet girl, because you are precious to me”, he said softly, his fingers squeezing hers. But then he pulled back, grinning behind the paper mask, his eyes teasing. “That don’t mean you can slack off when you’re better though. You’ll have done more than enough layin’ around by then.”

Her sudden giggles turned into coughs, and it was second nature by now to help her, easing her mask off her face so she could cough up the phlegm. Even her cough sounded easier since she’d had that special medicine that went through the breathing mask.

He’d made the right decision, bringing her back through the well to her mother. If she’d stayed in his time, like she wanted to, he wasn’t sure she would have made it. His gut churned at the thought making him feel sick to his stomach, and he pushed the horrible images that came to mind away quickly, not wanting to waste his time on them. Kagome was right in front of him, and was going to recover. She was okay. Everything was going to be okay. He breathed out a sigh of relief, but she’d already noticed the fleeting change in his expression. She always noticed.

“Inuyasha?”

He stroked her cheek, taking the chance to feel the soft skin under his fingers before he had to put the medicine mask back on her face, and shook his head.

“Ain’t important.”

“Yes it is, if it makes you look like that! What’s wrong?”

He sighed, dropping his hand down to caress her fingers, unable to look at her face.

“You could’a died Kagome. If you were livin’ with me in my time with this sickness, with no way back through the well, you probably would have. And I wouldn’a been able to do a damn thing about it!”

He drew in a ragged breath, his heart beating fast, his youkai instincts rising at the thought of what he was about to say, snarling at him, but he pushed them back. This wasn’t about him. It was about Kagome’s safety, and he would always put her first. He stared at her hands as he gathered his courage to say what he wanted to say; they were so much smaller than his own. He couldn’t risk her.

“Kagome… when all of this is over, when we’ve found all the shards and beaten Naraku, I… I think it would be best for you if-“

“Don’t you dare!” she said, her eyes incredulous. “Don’t you dare say that I should stay apart from you! When I promised to stay by your side Inuyasha, did you think I didn’t mean forever? Did you think they were just pretty words?!”

He shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut tight. “No, but… I nearly lost it when I thought you were gonna die Kagome, and I-.”

“News flash Inuyasha! People die in this time too! Look at my mother – her and Papa were so happy together, and he died. Modern medicine couldn’t save him even though we loved him and needed him. Does that mean everyone should keep apart from the people they love? Should we both be unhappy just because something bad might happen? Huh?!”

Inuyasha worriedly tried to soothe her with his hands, stroking her shoulders but she shrugged him off, her eyes snapping even as she took deep gulping breaths of air.

“No! It means the exact opposite! We should hold onto people we love so tightly, because we never know when they might be taken away. We should cherish every moment! I love you Inuyasha! And if you think I will let you push me away-“

Another coughing fit stopped her tirade, and he rubbed her back, getting ready to place the mask back over her face. The machine next to the bed began to beep faster, irritating him. She pushed his hand away, and he growled.

“For fucks sake, just hold on, would ya? I know ya wanna yell at me, but you can’t do that if ya can’t breathe stupid!” he huffed, securing the mask back over her face. “Just concentrate on taking deep breaths. That’s it. That’s my good girl.” Kagome’s eyes filled with tears, and he brushed them away gently with his thumbs, but more kept coming, and he gazed at her with a heartbroken expression, blinking away tears of his own.

“I didn’t mean to make you sad Kagome. It’s just… watchin’ you be so sick – I’ve never been so scared. It made me realise that I couldn’t lose you. I just couldn’t. And I thought, if there was some way that I could prevent that sickness happenin’ again, even though it would hurt me so much to let you go, I just…” He gulped, unable to go any further, swallowing his own emotions as he brushed his thumbs on her cheeks.

She closed her eyes breathing deeply for a few moments. “Being apart from you would hurt me more than anything else”, she whispered, panting as she spoke. “Please don’t pull away from me now, not when we’re so much closer. Please.”

He whined at the heartbroken tone in her voice, desperate to fix it. Mama’s voice spoke softly behind them.

“Kagome is right you know. No one knows how much time we’ll be given with those we love. It’s very easy to take that time for granted.” She moved quietly into the room, sitting down on the chair next to Inuyasha. Her voice was serious, but not sad.

“But it sounds like you two won’t ever do that. And it also sounds like you still have time to be able to make decisions about what happens after your quest, however long it takes. But whatever happens, it’s important to make those decisions together.”

Inuyasha sighed and nodded, dropping his hands away from Kagome’s face to grasp her hands in his. He wished he didn’t have the stupid paper mask on so he could kiss her fingers.

“Alright”, he muttered gruffly, sniffing quietly. “One thing at a time, wench. Let’s just get you better first, huh?”

Kagome gave him a watery smile, almost hidden by the breathing mask. She squeezed his fingers tightly, as if to show him she wouldn’t be letting him go in a hurry.

“Alright.”

💕

Inuyasha walked slowly and carefully along the thin dirt track, worn through the grass by years of villagers footsteps between the village and the Bone-Eaters Well. He leaned forward a little, not wanting to dislodge his sleeping cargo.

It had been just over a week since he’d carried Kagome back through the well in that desperate dash from Kaede’s isolation hut, and today was the first time he'd brought her back to his time. She’d only been out of hospital for two days, and even though her health was much improved, she still got out of breath easily and tired quickly.

She’d had a short visit to school this morning, just enough to see her teachers and pick up assignments for her subjects. Her mother had taken her, and he’d waited at the shrine at their insistence, sitting in the branches of Goshinboku and fretting about being apart from her.

All his senses were constantly attuned to her now – smelling her scent to make sure the illness wasn’t returning, listening to her heartbeat and breathing, needing to be close by so he could see that she was okay and reach out and touch her. He knew he was smothering her a little, but he couldn’t help it. Last night he’d sat outside the bathroom while she soaked in the tub, on alert just in case she dozed off in the water, and she’d almost tripped over him when she came out.

She’d understood his constant monitoring of her to some extent, but she was beginning to get a little exasperated at him. He was pretty sure if he kept it up, there’d be a solid string of ‘osuwari’ commands in his immediate future. But he couldn’t help it – she’d been so ill and still wasn’t quite recovered and probably wouldn’t be back to her full stamina for some weeks yet, and it brought out every protective instinct he had.

When Kagome and Mama had returned from school, Kagome had the bright idea of coming back to see the others, to show them she was okay. Her mother had agreed that a quick visit should be fine under Inuyasha’s watchful eye, even though he’d wanted to veto it, but he’d been helpless against Kagome’s pleading. It seemed he was turning into a spineless lap dog every time Kagome turned those persuasive blue eyes his way, and he wasn’t entirely upset about it.

Even though Inuyasha had been popping backwards and forwards through the well daily to keep everyone informed about Kagome’s progress, her arrival had provoked much excitement. Her friends had been delighted to see the physical proof that Kagome was on the mend.

Kirara and Shippou had burst out of Kaede’s hut the moment they sensed her drawing near, Kirara winding herself around Kagome’s ankles in greeting, and Shippou bouncing about more like frog than a fox. It was only Inuyasha’s warning growl that he would take Kagome home again if he couldn’t be calm around her that had settled the tiny kit down.

Kaede had welcomed them both into her home with warm smiles and the offer of tea. Sango had pounced on Kagome with a delighted hug, eager to talk and reconnect with her best friend, and Miroku was there with a grin and a brotherly pat on her shoulder, pleased to see her looking so much better.

They had visited with everyone at Kaede’s hut for an hour, Kagome chatting happily with everyone, but the moment she had yawned Inuyasha had been insistent on taking her home again.

Shippou had clung to her tearfully, but she’d assured him that Inuyasha would bring her back again tomorrow, and she’d stay longer. Her promise of a treat had probably helped dry his tears also, Inuyasha thought. He snorted. Shippou was nothing if not predictable.

A gradual increase in the speed of Kagome’s heartbeat had him looking over his shoulder as she stirred back to wakefullness, rubbing her cheek against his shoulder. He watched her yawn out of the corner of his eye, and smiled as she rested her chin on his shoulder, pressing her soft cheek against his.

“Oh look, how pretty!” she said quietly, mindful that her mouth was very close to his sensitive ears. “Do you think we can stop for a little while?” She pointed over to the grassy meadow near the well, which was currently filled with pink and purple cosmos flowers, swaying in the gentle breeze, and dozens of butterflies flitting about in the bright sunshine.

“I dunno”, he grumbled. “You’ve already been out all morning. This has been a busy day for you – ya only got outta bed for the first time the day before yesterday.”

“Please Inu? I promise I’ll be good! It’s so cloudy in Tokyo at the moment, and the weather report said it was going to rain this afternoon. It would be nice to sit in the sun for a little while, and I’m sure it would be good for me!” she wheedled in a pleading tone.

He sighed. “Okay, just for a bit then.” The phrase ‘whipped’ came to mind, but when she reached up to gently stroke his ear as a thank you, he found he didn’t care in the slightest.

Walking over to a particularly lush patch of grass, half in and half out of the sunshine, he eased her down off his back and they both sat down. Inuyasha sat up straight with his arms braced so Kagome could lean on him as a back rest.

It really was a beautiful day – birds chirping, clouds drifting far above in a sapphire blue sky. A pair of dark swallowtail butterflies fluttered directly overhead, and he tipped his head back to watch them, the iridescent colours in their wings flashing in the sunlight. A thought crossed his mind that he would never have really sat down to enjoy a grassy meadow like this before meeting Kagome. His mind would have been on where his next meal was coming from, his eyes, ears and nose vigilant to catch any traces of other youkai entering his forest. But now all his senses were trained on her.

He focused for a moment on the warm weight of her leaning against him, the regular movement of the muscles in her back as she breathed in and out. There was still a slight wheeziness to her breathing, but nothing like it had been before. The sun went behind a cloud and she shivered slightly.

“You’re not cold are ya? Cause I can take you back through the well right now if ya are”, he fussed.

“Stop it will you? Mother hen!” Kagome elbowed him hard in the ribs, and he grunted, clutching his side and pretending to be mortally wounded as he flopped down to lay on his back in the grass next to her. He squinted as the sun came back out from behind the clouds suddenly, and she shaded his eyes from the bright sunlight with her hand as she giggled. “Let me just enjoy the sunshine for a little while longer. I’m perfectly fine. It’s nice sitting outside after being in bed for nearly a week.”

She leaned over him to cast his face in shadow, her hands either side of his shoulders and a bright grin on her face. The light behind her gave her dark hair a radiant halo, picking out iridescent blue highlights much like the butterflies’ wings, and her clear blue eyes were more luminous than the skies above. He stared up at her, a rush of emotion welling up, filling his heart. She was so beautiful, inside and out. This girl. His sweet girl.

Reaching up he cupped her cheek, and she turned her head to place a soft kiss in his palm. Even though he’d hated that she’d been ill, they were so much closer now. All his barriers had fallen away – he was an open book to her now, and he wanted to be.

“Kagome… you know I’m not good with words, but-“. Her finger pressed down on his lips.

“Don’t use your words then” she whispered. “You’re much better at showing than talking Inuyasha, you always have been. Show me what you want to tell me.”

“C’mere then wench.” His clawed fingers curled around the red tie of her school uniform shirt, gently tugging her downwards to press his lips softly to hers.

She whimpered, her voice and her scent conveying to him just how much she wanted this too. It seemed like they had been dancing around their feelings forever, but there had never been the time or space to allow it to happen, with constant interruptions. But right now, nothing was going to stop him showing her the things he was never able to say, the emotions he’d tried to hide up until now, the absolute wealth of adoration that he held in his heart for her.

The first touch of their lips was intoxicating to him, and his mouth moved hungrily, savouring their connection. Her lips were soft and sweet, just like he’d always imagined them to be, and he couldn’t resist sucking gently on her bottom lip, fangs scraping slightly as he slid the tip of his tongue over the plump pink flesh. He almost pulled back in surprise when her own tongue tentatively met his. His youki rose as her scent spiked, and he eagerly deepened the kiss, growling his approval, unable to hold back any longer.

Kagome traced the contours of his face with her fingertips as they kissed, and he took her hand in his, entwining their fingers. He reveled in the weight of her over him, their racing hearts almost beating in tandem. With his fervent kisses he desperately tried to convey the depth of his feelings, and she responded in kind, her own lips eager as his.

Stroking her hair with his free hand, his claws grazing against her skin now and again, Inuyasha sighed against her lips, knowing that he would have to pull back soon, as much as they both wanted to keep this going. She was still recovering, and her breathing was becoming erratic. He would not rush this. They had time now, time to let this happen gradually, at their own pace.

He pulled back from the kiss, grinning at her little whine of discontent even as she panted for breath, and he soothed her by pressing soft kisses along her jawline, then nuzzled his nose into her neck, inhaling the heady scent of her as he struggled to get his own breathing and libido under control.

“You okay?” he whispered, using his hand to gently lay her head down on his chest, combing his fingers through her dark hair.

“Wow”, she panted.“Just gotta… catch my breath. We’re gonna do that again, right?”

He chuckled. “Definitely, if I have any say in it.”

They lay there together in the sunshine, holding each other close. Time didn’t seem to matter. Nothing mattered, apart from the feel of her lying safe against his chest, her heart beating strongly against his. He pressed his nose into her hair, breathing in her scent. The contented rumble in his chest made Kagome grin, turning her head to rest her chin against his chest.

“I love that sound”, she smiled, gazing into his eyes. “I love how it makes me feel, like nothing bad could ever happen when I’m in your arms.”

“Damn straight.” He swallowed, taking a deep breath. “Cause… cause you’re mine Kagome, and I protect what’s mine.”

Her smile widened, rivaling the sun in it’s brightness. “And you’re mine Inuyasha, and don’t you forget it.” She yawned widely, her eyes blinking, and he reached up to cradle her cheek.

“Sounds like you need a nap wench-o-mine.” She smiled sleepily.

“I am a little tired. What a good thing you’re so comfy”, she teased, poking at his stomach with her fingers and rubbing her cheek against his chest.

“Oi! What am I now, a futon?” he chuckled. She breathed deeply and closed her eyes, snuggling in to get comfortable.

“Shhh, futon’s don’t talk.”

“Are ya sure you don’t want me to take you back through the well?” he asked with concern. “It’s gettin’ later in the afternoon, and your bed’s probably better for ya right now.”

“Nope. Nothing could be better for me than being right here with you. Now shush.”

He listened as her breathing settled and her heartbeat slowed to a steady resting pace. The shade of the tree moved over them, and he wrapped his arms around her, the voluminous sleeves of his fire rat acting as a protective blanket as she slept contentedly in his arms.

He didn’t know what he’d done to deserve her; he’d never really understood what she could see in him that he’d never been able to see himself. All he knew was that he would thank the Kami every damn day that she’d somehow come into his life, against all odds, and he would freely give her his heart and soul. Would continue to protect her with his life as they fought this battle against Naraku together.

He was still worried about what might happen after the jewel was purified, but for now, he was content to let the future look after itself. Because how could his future be anything but bright, with Kagome by his side.

#mamabearcat fanfics #inukag fanfic #Instinct #last chapter - finally!

[thunderpot]

Based on Bones. Similar stuff and stuff that were never there either. Do not expect much from it.

As promised, I’m organizing all the tags+the other things I didn’t say before in a bullet point fashion for convenience haha. Watch out for a wall of text. I will keep links to the doodles when/IF I do them, and whenever I think of anything for this AU I’ll update this, so take it as a masterpost of sorts? Also please do not expect me to actually write anything for it, I just like to have fun thinking about AUS, so feel free to work on top of it if you’d like!

Basic summary: A genius anthropologist and a special agent go around solving crimes together+ glorious slowburn

Doodles:

1 | 2 |

WORLD

Youkai and humans live together, but not in complete peace. While part of the population thinks both should be able to share the world, There are human and youkai factions that believe they’re better off without the other part. 

There are war and neutral zones throughout the world. 

The united kingdoms is how people call the countries where human and youkai live together (The majority of the world)

There is no mating mark in this, but there is a bond that might happen between youkai and human. It's extremely rare, though, and kagome doesn't believe it exists - but inuyasha does.

Word of mout says that with the bond, both parties naturally connect their essence/soul, and the advantage AND disadvantage is that one lives as long as the other. You might get to live centuries, or have a premature death in case your lover dies.

KAGOME

Has a PDH in Antropology, forensic anthropology, kinesiology and an honorary doctorate in Human-Youkai power relations

Works at the Musashi National Museum as an anthropologist and doubles as forensic anthropologist whenever InuYasha brings her a new case.

Kagome and Sango’s fave past time is to learn how to use old weapons they find around in the museum. Sango specializing in the hiraikotsu and Kagome in bow and arrow

Lost most of her family (except her brother) early on to a youkai on a killing spree; she has difficulty connecting to others thanks to it: she will be gentle, but never let others trully in.

Was assigned to work with Inuyasha on an unprecedented effort to solve a case involving the death of a youkai because Kagome was the only one who could actually analyse their bones

Doesn’t trust inuyasha at all for at first 6 months after they’re assigned together, but the bonding they have through the cases eases her out with time.

Is not unusual to see her and the hanyou bantering

Has no problem admiting Inuyasha IS hot, but anything other than that will receive a big “you’re mistaken”.

If she is alone with Inuyasha, however, she doesn’t really notice how intimate she can get.

Just wants a damn gun to shoot people, but Inuyasha keeps denying her (but strangely giving her his own weapons whenever needed)

Only found out about Inuyasha’s human night after one year, when they were forced to follow up on a case right in the middle of the night and he showed up black haired. That got her really pissed, but she also understood his situation.

A few of her interns include Shippou and Ayame

She actually finds it funny whenever Inuyasha makes some drama over his senses being overwhelmed by either the bodies or the places they’re found in.

She and Inuyasha only really become a couple after they go through a lot together in the span of maybe 3-5 years

A lot goes on, from misunderstandings to forced saparations due to either projects or the war and even both struggling with their own feelings

but they get very solid after things finally happen

She is very strict about getting to the bottom of things and about her methods.

Can be pretty bossy at times (a trait Inuyasha will never admit to liking)

INUYASHA

The firerat actually changes with the passing of time to accomodate Inuyasha’s needs and he actually uses it to work.

After meeting kagome, he just doesn’t work as well when his partner is anyone other than her.

Always gets confused by all the scientific talk Kagome has for him about the cases, but ends up learning a thing or two.

He actually likes solving civilian cases because he considers them pretty chill in comparison to the war, but he really hates the smell of rotting corpses. Kagome teases him to no end about taking bullets without a sweat but bitching about “a little smell”.

He might have had to get out of the area once or twice when things were really smelly.

Was also briefly married to Kikyou years ago but it didn’t work out.

Spent decades as part of the frontline in the war. Is a condecorated hero, and to his misfortune, gets called out here and there to come back when the need arises. 

The longer he spends with Kagome, the more unbearable these gaps become to him, as they are usually not short.

He does use tessaiga whenever he is sent to war, but not inside the country. Kagome never saw him using it in the first 3 years either.

He does use tessaiga inside a civilian area once, however, to protect Kagome from a youkai who got obsessed with her.

Needless to say she got wildly shocked by both the form and the destructive power of the thing - but he does not let her study the weapon because he doesn’t think anything good would come out of it.

He has no problem in letting her mess around with it when it’s just the two of them, though.

He also has a mild PTSD thanks to various works he had done under the mat for the government in the last100 years, and that makes him a bit overprotective of Kagome. He can also become very agressive if he cannot assess her safety quickly when things go south.

He also gets very stressed and a bit on the edge during his human nights.

Lost his father to the war.

His brother didn't take the loss easily and they hadn't spoke ever since - it's been over 50 years.

Is secretly a second in line prince to one of the youkai kingdoms, but not even kagome knows about it

Got head over hills for Kagome after just 3 months of knowing her, but won’t admit it no matter what, even if it’s painfully obvious to everybody.

Still lives on with his life and even has a fling here and there to try to ease up his own situation

Kouga, an old partner of his, notices that and teases him to no end about it.

His hair grows up quite fast, and it’s not uncommon for him to cut it or show up with it at different lengths. He usually lets it grow out for undercover missions, and cuts it as short as possible whenever he is called by the army.

Sango

Coroner, weapon and ballistic expert, Kagome’s best friend

Likes to tease Kagome about InuYasha, but is actually happy for her friend.

Conflicted between her love for solving crimes and wanting a mundane life.

Miroku

Former monk, forensic entomologist and botanist

Kagome’s oldest friend

apparently a conspiracy theory lover, he is actually very wise and very sensible. 

Usually the person Sango turns to when she needs advice.

Sesshoumaru

Daiyoukai, king of a big chunk of the United Kingdoms

Has a kid

Who his kid’s mother is is uknown to Inuyasha, although it is known that she is alive and well. Inuyasha does not understand why Sesshoumaru is so overprotective of her.

Hasn’t spoke to inuyasha in the last 50 years

#god this is really long? #but it's also all I have thought about it the night I came up with it haha #sorry about it! #also sorry for any mispellings again #it's been a while since the last time I did anything like this #inuyasha #inuyasha au

[ajoy3fanfics]

Missing pt.VII

Also found on FF.NET

Hope everyone enjoys the chapter! 

~.~

There wasn’t many things Inuyasha was sure of anymore, but there were a few key things he would stake his life on; First, he had screwed up, in some majorly colossal way, and now he and Kagome were not together anymore. Second, he was lucky as hell to have the employees he did in his company, who kept it up and running when he was in the hospital; Third, and most importantly (he couldn’t stress this enough)- he was going to murder Miroku.

No, it hadn’t always been that way. Before the capricious man used to hold the title as his best friend! He hadn’t always wanted to strangle the life out of him and watch as the smirk faded away from his lips; but as Miroku sat by his side at the table, a smug look of satisfaction on his face as he nudged him playfully with his shoulder, Inuyasha was sure that by the night was over, he was going to kill him.

“See?” He whispered, low enough so that only the hanyou could hear, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “I told you didn’t I? Yukka is great!” He raised his brows suggestively, indicating that he was referring to more than her personality. “This is exactly what you need.”

Miroku had set him up on a damn blind date. The bastard had to die.

Funny, he always assumed his best friend would have been done in by an angry ex-lover; angry ex-best friend had to hold some merit, right?

It had been a month since he had left the hospital and came home to Miroku’s one bed, one bath apartment. It was cramped, sure, and not ideal to be spending his lonesome nights on the leather couch instead of snuggled behind Kagome, the sweet smell of her soft scent lulling him to sleep. It wasn’t perfect, but it was bearable. He was happy to be with a friend than utterly alone going through this alone.

Small mercies, right?

Living with together with Miroku was nostalgic; They settled into a routine fairly quickly, already knowing each other’s likes and dislikes, not having changed much since their roommate days in college. Inuyasha was still sensitive to noises early in the morning and Miroku still hated it when Inuyasha left a dirty dish in the sink. Spending time apart and growing up had made the transition a much easier one than when they were still in their teens. A little care and consideration, and a lot of maturity made the whole thing a lot easier; except for the no Kagome thing. That was rather annoying.

Once the initial shock of Kagome dating had worn off it was replace with anger, so strong it was borderline blinding. When he stood up, ready to beat his competition bloody, Miroku had talked him down. Why not wait? He had asked. Inuyasha had difficulty controlling himself when he barked out his response. She was dating! There was already too much time wasted! Any second he spent talking it over with him was another second she was in the arms of someone else.

Had she kissed him? Have they fucked? Did she love this guy? Did she love him?Dangerous questions raced through his mind making him dizzy. He had to sit down on the bed, head in hands while he breathed deeply.

Miroku patted his shoulder sympathetically. “Why not wait until your memory returns? Then you can go forward with all the facts. If you go now, in this state, you could say or do something to make things worse and she might never forgive you. Just wait, my friend.”

Is what the bastard said.

But what he meant was “it’s time to get over her.”

That was never more clear than it was now, with a leggy brunet sitting across from him, biting her lip as she shyly stole a glance at him. His ear twitched as he picked up her hushed whisper “He’s really cute.” To the friend at her side.

It was obvious that Miroku had very little faith in his ability to get Kagome back, and this was probably an act of kindness in his fucked up mind. Who the hell sets an engaged man up on a blind date?

Sort of engaged, that is. Miroku never failed to remind him of that

Kagome talk was strictly off limits.

Miroku had insisted that it wasn’t fair, and down right creepy to stalk her. Inuyasha, on the other hand, disagreed. What was wrong with keeping tabs on her? She was always so clumsy, constantly tripping into things. And so bad with directions! What if she got lost and needed him? Apparently, he was “obsessive” and maybe that’s why “she left his crazy ass.”

Miroku had gotten a black eye from that one. He wasn’t even that upset; he knew it was crossing the line, and it made him look ‘tough’.

Or that’s what he told him when Yuri walked over to them, wearing a slim, low cut black dress that left little to the imagination. On her arm was a stunning woman, the type that could have stepped out of a magazine. She was tall and sexy, with long brown hair that fell around her shoulders in soft waves. When the pair sat down at the table, Yuri leaning over to give Miroku a kiss on the cheek and then introduce Yukka, Inuyasha felt his world turn red. His traitorous ex best friend was going to pay.When he had figured out what was going on, albeit a little too slowly, he immediately stood up, ready to walk away. Miroku tugged on his wrist, doing his best to pull the hanyou down toward his seat. “You owe me.” He said under hushed breath, loud enough so that only he could hear. “No.” His stern voice left no room for argument, but Miroku was relentless. “Yes.Give it a shot and I wont bug you about it again. If you leave so will my date. You oweme, man.” He stood up to greet the guests, introducing the two women; Inuyasha gave little more than a grunt of acknowledgement as they sat down.

His plan was to get the night over with as fast as possible. Then he could go back to discussing his Kagome related theories out loud and Miroku wouldn’t be able to say a damn thing.

“It’s so awesome you own your own business.” Yukka said after taking a sip of her drink. “My father used to run a convince store. My brother took it over after he retired. It’s so much work when you’re the boss. I basically spent my childhood stocking shelves.” She laughed at her memory and Inuyasha smiled, trying to be polite. He could relate to that; he had worked at his father’s company from infancy, his mother answering the phones while he napped in the play pen. Clients used to remark how family oriented the business was, and it would keep their business.

But he told her none of that, of course. That was information he didn’t need to share, not with Yukka anyway. He pressed his lips together in a thin smile and nodded, a look of clear disinterest on his face as he took a sip of his beer, thinking of all the ways he was going to maim Miroku when they returned home.

Although from the way Yuri had her hands all over him, whispering things in his ear that make even Miroku blush, he doubted his roommate was leaving with him.

When he got home from his escapades thenhe would kill him. Who the hell did he think he was, trying to set him up? He wasn’t looking for some one night stand, or a something that could turn serious. He was interested in Kagome.

“We’re going to go order some more drinks at the bar.” Miroku suddenly said, after grasping Yuri’s hand and leading her away. Somehow, Inuyasha doubted it; if he was a betting man, he would put money on the pair finding an empty bathroom stall and Yuri on her knees.

“This is pretty awkward, isn’t it?” Yukka said, idly pushing around the noodles on her plate. “I really don’t like blind dates.”

“I didn’t even know I was going on a date.” He supplied rather bitterly.

“Sounds like an ambush.” She gave him a half smile as she leaned in closer, resting her head on her hands. “How terrible for you.”

Inuyasha shrugged. “It’s always terrible when Miroku is around a woman. Its unpleasant for everyone involved.”

She laughed and Inuyasha felt awkward. He hadn’t meant to be funny, people in general didn’t find his wit amusing. He knew his humor was often dry and lacking, finding that it grew on people over time. Either Yukka was being polite or she had some odd tastes. “He seems alright.” She said. “I mean, clearly he’s a flirt and is just looking for a good time, but hey, that’s Yuri’s type.” She sighed before she continued, a kind smile gracing her lips. “You don’t have to stay, you know. I mean, I don’t want you to feel obligated to sit and have dinner with me because your friend forced you to. Like I said, blind dates suck, so I wouldn’t be offended. I totally get it.”

The silence felt heavy when he finished talking, like he needed to fill it. It wasn’t like he could come out and tell her that he needed to stay for the duration in order to rub it in Mirokus face.  He watched as she sat back a little, absent-mindedly rubbing her hand over her arm, clearly chilly. He would have offered his hoodie, if it was Kagome. Then again, if it was Kagome shewould have forced him to bring one, always fearful he would get sick despite his far superior immune system. She liked to care for him in those small ways, even if it didn’t make a difference. She treated him like anyone else. Inuyasha swallowed hard, needing to change the subject. It was hard to think of her without wanting to cry and fling the heavy ceramic plate across the room at the same time.

“I’m-I don’t mind staying, but I have to let you know… I’m not interested in dating, or hooking up or anything like that.” He stated bluntly.

She nodded, her hair bouncing. “Good, neither am I.” Inuyasha scoffed, clearly not buying her story.

“So why did you agree to come? If you don’t like blind dates, and you’re not looking for a relationship or getting laid.”

Yukka smiled. “Have you metYuri? She gets herself into bad situations all the time. Part of me wanted to go just to make sure she wasn’t seeing some creep and would make it back alive. But, the other part of me was interested.” She smiled as leaned forward a bit. “It’s been a while since I dated. I got out of a long term relationship and just dove into work. It’s hard to meet people, you know? Even if we don’t have a love connection, its fun to get out, isn’t it?”

“Haven’t you heard of dating apps?” He scoffed. “They’re literally made for that. Plenty of fish, tinder, any of that ring a bell?” Not that he ever used them, but he’d heard of them at least.

She laughed, soft and full at the same time. “How long have you been out of the dating scene? Those are for hook ups, buddy. The last guy I met on tinder was a doctor. He liked to ski in the winter and go out on his boat in the summer and volunteered at an animal shelter on the weekends.”

Inuyasha narrowed his brows. “That doesn’t sound too bad.” He said. Did this woman have incredibly high standards or what? “So why aren’t you out on the doctors boat instead of having cheap beers with me?”

“Yeah, all good in theory. Except do you know who actuallyshowed up?”

“Who?” He asked, and before he even realized it, he was engaged and enjoying her conversation. She was easy to talk to. His jaw actually dropped when she told her story, and before he knew it, he found himself chatting back. It wasn’t an unpleasant way to spend the night.

Miroku and Yuri returned later, looking disheveled and flushed, only to find the table missing one key player. “Where’s Inuyasha?” Mirkou asked, raking a hand through his black hair.

Yukka shrugged. “He said he had to go. I- I thought we were having a good time, then he just stood up and left.” She pouted a bit, making her lips look even puffier. Yuri rushed to her side and somehow Miroku knew he was going home alone tonight.

Mirkou frowned as he looked at the half eaten plate of chicken and the bills thrown down on the table to cover his fare. It was a bold move, trying to set Inuyasha up; back in their college days the man was a literal dog. He could smooth talk any woman he wanted, although it didn’t seem to take much back then. He had no interest in relationships, no interest in settling down in any way, shape or form.

But then he met Kagome.

It was like he did a complete 180 overnight. He met her and came back to their dorm starry eyed. He took her out for a date, and actual date, and barely managed to kiss her he was so nervous. From the moment he first spoke about her, he knew his best friend was ruined.

Really, he should have known better trying to set him up, but the man was so heart broken he thought a distraction woud do him some good. Once he had Kagome, there was no one else for him; When he heard the news that he and Kagome broke up he easily brushed it off as bullshit. There was no way he would have broken up with her, no way he would have found someone else.

Honestly, he wasn’t surprised Inuyasha fled. Without being told, he knew where he had gone, and for his sake, he hoped he wouldn’t screw this up.

~.~

He found himself outside of their door - herdoor now. Just hers. He didn’t live there anymore. It was a shot in the dark, checking their old apartment to try and find her, but for once, the Gods were on his side. She hadn’t moved, the scent wafting from the doorframe told him that.

It also told him she wasn’t home.

It had been so long since he saw her, so long since he spoke to her. It was nice, talking to Yukka. She was pretty and fun and a great story teller. It was easy to spend time with someone like that.

But it didn’t matter.

She wasn’t Kagome.

It wasn’t that he forgot about her when they started to talk; Kagome wasn’t the only thing that raced through his mind. It was true, at first, that he compared her to his fiancé. Kagome was prettier, her curves more his taste and her darker hair gave her pale skin a beautiful contrast. Yukka was taller, but that wasn’t necessarily a good thing; He liked that Kagome was short, liked to watch her stand on her tippy toes as she stretched to get the rice from the second shelve in the cupboard.

But as the date wore on, he found himself comparing less and just enjoying the company. She was interesting and had some crazy stories to share. And he just kept thinking ‘I’ve got to tell Kagome about this. She would eat this shit up.’ His thoughts always came back to her. He was sitting across from a great woman, really- she was a catch- but it never crossed his mind. What he did think about his how Kagome would react when he retold her escapades- about the surprise ending and how she would sit on the edge of her seat as he delivered the punch line, leaning in closer to him like she always did when she was invested in a story, how she would playfully hit his shoulder in excitement, no doubt because she would have ‘called it’ earlier. There was no way he could move on; in his mind, he was still dating Kagome. He wanted that, wanted her and no one else;  He could have easily bedded Yukka, could have easily found a dozen women to take her place. But if it wasn’t Kagome, it didn’t matter, tonight’s debacle proved that. He wanted to see her again, wanted to wrap himself around her and find the comfort he was so sorely lacking. He wanted to go home.

So he did; the ache in his chest was painful, he felt like he couldn’t breathe. He knew that the only way he would find an ounce of relief was with her,not a substitute. He apologized and placed some bills on the table before he bolted out of the door, heading in the direction his heart told him he should’ve gone weeks ago. Maybe Miroku was right; maybe he should wait until his memory returned, maybe he would make things worse by showing up at her doorstep, fresh from a date.

But he didn’t care.

He wasn’t sure what he would find when he ran down the same street he used to walk, climbed the steps two at a time, gripping the rail more out of nerves than for support. Once he was sure that she still lived in their building he breathed a sigh of relief; but it was short lived- the next hurdle was what or whowould he find when he got there? He was ready to fight for her, that wasn’t the issue. The real problem would be holding back and not actually killing the bastard who dared to take his place. He had waited too long, allowed another to take his spot like a fool. Not any longer.

Well, a little longer. He was amped up and full of nerves and she wasn’t home. The tension eased, a little, as he slid to the floor, back against the white door. Where was she? Out with that Koga guy? Taking the pictures heshould’ve taken? Were they eating together, having a date much like he was just minutes earlier? Was he about to take her home? Was she thinking about him, feeling the same pain he did? Or was it all too late?

He decided he would sit there and wait; Best case, she came alone. Worse case, she didn’t come at all…. Or came with him. And that just wasn’t acceptable, not anymore. He wouldn’t lose his nerve, wouldn’t budge until he saw her, would be leave until she heard him out. He-

Her scent came to him, crisp and refreshing. His heart was beating double speed, he was sure she could heart its anxious sound from the stair well. When he heard her voice, his breath hitched in his throat, nerves strained as he opened and clenched his fists as her figure came into full view, a bags of groceries in her hand, and thankfully, no one by her side. Her blue eyes were wide with shock as she let out a small gasp of surprise.

“Inuyasha?”

#inuyasha #inufanfic #inukag #missing #ajoy3

[tekka-dan]

I watched this Youtube video today regarding the topic “Anime That Made Me Who I Am” which turned out to be intriguing. At first, I immediately thought he was going to speak only about early 90s classic anime, then he mentioned some that I watched only in my teenage years and it kind of dawned on me..how other people view anime. What anime says about them that influenced their ideals of who they are today. What are yours?

Interesting. What video was it, out of curiosity? And what youtuber?

This was sort of tough because I resonated with so many superb animes over the years. Hm. I’ll give it a shot though.

These aren’t in order of best/better or anything.

1. Inuyasha

As a child this was the very first anime that I watched, loved and kept up with. I remember setting my alarm clock to wake up at 4:30am to watch it on adult swim and I would sit so close to my television because the volume was on low and I didn’t want to get in trouble. Inuyasha was an obsession, I was drawn to the ideals of Naraku, I was invested in the time Inuyasha spent with Kagome and I was enamored with the humor mixed with surreal themes throughout the show. As a child I didn’t understand Kagura’s rebellion and I didn’t care about Kana’s devotion. I was intrigued by Sesshomaru’s determination though and Rin’s ability to humanize a demon. As a child this anime was my entire world because it opened my eyes to wanting more of it. I wanted to see more anime like Inuyasha. I have to also add that being as young as I was, Inuyasha for many people like myself was the first anime we all probably understood. It was simplistic and it tackled the audience in a damn good way of who was watching.Inuyasha was also my very first surreal disappointment of a bad ending though. The love and obsession for the show as a whole doesn’t reconcile the pain and agony I felt after that anticlimactic ending.

2. Clannad After Story

Clannad was one of the animes I watched out of sheer boredom. Yes, I heard the sob stories for years and no that isn’t what intrigued me to watch this anime. Believe it or not, I used to be interested in romance animes, I kind of was drawn to how the boring every day school life could be riddled with romance, something I lacked throughout my entire school life. Diving into Clannad you’re not really expecting what comes next to happen..well, next. The anime does a damn good job of execution and plot twists where your attention can focus on multiple things going on and still have an overlaying theme that’s going to hit you like a boulder at the end. It did really well distracting you from the moments where you knew you were crying but you couldn’t hold back smiling either. It knew all too well that you were invested for the characters..the story though, is what damn near killed me. Not just once though, fucking twice. This was the first anime that I actively cried in. That I actively couldn’t believe happened. So let me tell you something—it wasn’t just what happened that made me cry, it was the dialogue given and portrayed that really resonated with me. There’s a crucial scene of Tomoya speaking to his father and if you’ve watched the anime you’re aware of the relationship they had during his childhood and after Tomoya’s tragedy, it is mirrored (fucking PERFECTLY) what his father went through during Tomoya’s childhood that as an adult he faces the same situation in..this scene had me on the floor balling my eyes out because my father and I have the same relationship and it..tore me in half to know after all those years, Tomoya’s father lived FOR Tomoya. And Tomoya damn near ended his life knowing he too had someone he needed to live for. The flashbacks, the music, the dialogue, EVERYTHING about that scene tore me to pieces. It was the way Tomoya said “I’m so sorry, dad” by the way he said “Take care of yourself.” It was the way “Goodbye” wasn’t a goodbye, it was a “Good luck.” It was the way Tomoya had to find it in his cold, angry and distraught heart that he had to realize he was not the only one who was allowed to suffer and be in pain, and that he was selfish as a child to ignoring his father’s pain and dismissing him as a drunk, not as a recovering sudden single parent. That scene is the epitome of brilliance. I watched that anime during a critical time in my life and even while thinking about it I’m reminded of the moments I couldn’t stop crying. It helped me speak to my dad in a different way. It helped me understand him as a person, not only as a parent.

3. Fruits Baskets

I watched this anime as a child, early teenage years and it could not have been at a better time in my life. Getting older this anime actually remains in my top 5 animes to ever exist in my book and I wish more people knew about it, talked about it. Fruits Baskets was the second anime that made me cry. But not just one episode, through most of the damn season. Whether it was a background story or sheer brilliant dialogue delivery and emotion from characters—this show hit on every single milestone as a teenager growing up in the world of misfortunes. The second main character not only is believable in his disdain towards the rest of the cast, but the humor doesn’t take his anger away from him as a character. One of the characters does so well at being his polar opposite, it’s damn near hard to believe he was the reason behind the second main persons demise and embarrassment. The entire cast of characters have unique quirks, they aren’t downplayed and they aren’t over shadowed. As a teenager growing up, there was one episode that changed how I am today. I used to believe there was nothing special or unique about me, I believed I was just on this earth to outlive my parents and that was it. One episode was the true embodiment (to me) of living for the sake of yourself because you owe yourself that, to make something of yourself while you’re here. This episode to this day remains in my top 3 nest executed episodes to date by far, I haven’t seen such a brilliant scene that comes close to it in my twenty one years of a lifespan thus far. This anime changed the way I viewed others, viewed myself and how I became of age. It’s very, very dear to me.

4. Assassination Classroom

I regret not finding this anime sooner. I regret not being obsessed with this anime during my earlier years of high school or later years of middle school. I regret it so much.This anime changed my entire world, from the way others see me up to the very aspect of my being. The character that resonated with me far better than anyone was Karma Akabane. It was the way he was introduced as an antagonist and ended up being the exact direction the show needed to mold around. Karma’s character struck me as interesting from the second he appeared on screen, but it wasn’t his appearance or sinister personality. It was how real Karma was and how afraid he internally was as well. Every obstacle Karma faced and overcame was due to his over confidence that he was just GOOD at everything he tried and does. When he failed the one thing he was confident about, it wasn’t just a strike to his ego, it was his entire nature as a person. The reason I loved his character so much was because life was just life to him, he wasn’t really interested in the outcome, barely even the trail and error. He just wanted results and he didn’t do anything to better them, he knew he was good. When I watched this anime during the year that I did I was at a loss of..direction. I didn’t have motivation and it seemed like life couldn’t hand me a single..reward for all of my wasted effort I was putting into everything. This anime changed my life because it gave me the hope I needed and it helped me understand myself so much more. This show is littered with humour but behind every single smile on the show there were cruel lessons that I just wish could’ve been driven into my head at a younger age than when I stumbled upon it.

5. Naruto

I thought I’d regret adding this to my list but I think in all fairness it deserves to be here. Everyone knows the disastrous ending this anime had and we could debate for another ten years, it won’t change the lessons it taught us that we embodied and will carry with us throughout our life spans.When I stumbled on this anime I wasn’t even in middle school yet. As a child, it seemed like something an average person could enjoy and achieve. I bought naruto stuff, even the book of hand signs and I sat in my room learning the fire style technique hand signs to show off to my brothers for weeks. This was just something as a child I do not regret diving into. It taught my harsh lessons regarding friendships and it taught me lessons regarding hardships and endurance. I was at an age where I wasn’t really appreciative of very many things and as a young kid becoming a teenager, there weren’t many lessons a parent could teach a child without saying “I’ve been there, I know what I’m talking about” because as true as that was, it didn’t help being a child and feeling like your parents were trying to keep you from maturing into your own being with your own views and opinions. Naruto as a child helped me embody those morals and helped give light to what was important throughout life and a massive theme was friendship.As an adult and looking back on those friendships, I’ve learned some of them were one sided and overall toxic but I still don’t regret having them, otherwise I wouldn’t appreciate the ones I have now thanks to knowing what to avoid. Naruto was the anime that drove home “No matter who you are or where you come from, always believe in yourself. And never let friends down.” You’d play the naruto battle theme song while walking to class in middle school and it still probably wouldn’t resonate with you in this day and age how important those lessons were and still are.It had a terrible cluster fuck of an ending but it still remains of the animes that undoubtedly changed my entire life and made me who I definitely am to this day.

#inuyasha #assassination classroom #naruto #fruits baskets #clannad #clannad after story

[medea10]

My Review of Beyond the Boundary

#anime review #beyond the boundary #kyoukai no kanata #mirai kuriyama #akihito kanbara #mitsuki nase #hiromi nase #miroku fujima

[kagkik]

I would like to know what do you think about the episode in kanketsu-hen (the final act) in which the villain (can't remember his name) enters the mind/heart of inuyasha and says that kikyo was the woman he most loved. Do you think he doesn't love kagome the same way? I read in blogs that inuyasha only stayed with kagome because kikyo died and that she would be the substitute. I do not agree and I wanted to know your opinion. Sorry if my English is bad, it's not my native language

ooh ok ok this is a good ask i’ll tell you my thoughts and general ideas on it, and also your english is fine i could understand you perfectly!!

(right so basically i think the whole inukagkik thing was really mishandled in the anime but since this ask is about an anime episode i’ll try not to talk with too much manga bias.)

summarising the relationship as a whole, the way i saw it, the love inuyasha and kikyo felt for each other was very different to what they themselves and everyone else thought was. it was always emphasised (especially in the anime) that they had this great, all-powerful love that was the center of everything, which in a way it was because it was the core of the story and set the events in motion, but it was always portrayed particularly from kagome’s perspective that it was something she could never have when it came to her relationship with inuyasha.

inukag and inukik are very different relationships when properly examined, and in my opinion the anime kind of failed to really focus on that and just made them a dramatic and annoying love triangle, which is why that episode in the final act does make it seem like kagome was only second best to inuyasha, and that he was merely settling for her since kikyo was dead.

to combat this, we have to look at both relationships as a whole.

when inuyasha and kikyo first met, they were both probably the most alone that they’d ever been in their entire lives. though in different ways, they were both brushed aside and shunned; inuyasha because of his half demon, half human blood, and kikyo because of her responsibility as a miko. all their lives they’d been alone and hurting, so when they meet, they see another person that’s just like them! so naturally they gravitate towards one another despite the scorn of the villagers.

now, because of this, they decided to call the bond they’d made love, but honestly i don’t think it was necessarily romantic love. yes, they loved each other very much, but it was their reluctance to fully open up to and trust one another that made it so easy for naraku to trick them.

even without solid proof, both inuyasha and kikyo were both completely convinced that the other had betrayed everything they’d promised each other, and swore lethal revenge, which eventually resulted in both their deaths. truly a tragedy of tragedies, but the story of inuyasha is not a tragedy.

it’s a fairytale.

we skip ahead fifty years and kagome enters the picture. at first prior to waking up, inuyasha is distant and cold towards kagome due to her likeness to kikyo, and even cruel at times. his ordeal with kikyo truly broke his already sorrowful heart (the guy’s had a tough life already), and seeing kikyo’s face in kagome’s every day only reminds him of that heartbreak. but amid this we also see something else begin to emerge in inuyasha’s character, which is honestly one of the factors of why i began to love him.

we saw that he could be kind.

i personally when describing inuyasha would not use kind as one of the descriptive terms, but you begin to see as he spends more time with kagome that he isn’t exactly the type of character that just hands out trust and affection and kindness easily. he grants it to those he feels deserve it, which touched me because this boy has been running from humans and demons all his life, but as we grow to know him along with kagome (remember we don’t even know the full extent of his past with kikyo until later on in the series) we see that he’s completely starved of love and acceptance. and that’s why inuyasha’s bond with kagome is far stronger in my opinion than his with kikyo. because being the soulful and kind character she just naturally is, partnered with the mindset of living in the generally more accepting culture of the future, she simply handed him the two things he hadn’t had for two hundred years since the day his mother died.

unconditional love and acceptance.

when kikyo is revived and thrown back into the mix, even though the anime tries extremely hard to hype up the love that was once between them, if you’re paying attention it was so clear from even way back then who inuyasha would choose, regardless of whether kikyo was alive or not, because it all came down to who could give him that acceptance he needed. and even though i absolutely love kikyo (my darling. my angel) with every fiber of my soul, unfortunately, that was something she just couldn’t do.

which wasn’t her fault.

the time period she was living in contributed to the way she viewed things and it was because of that that she would never be able to fully accept inuyasha, unless she stopped asking him to use the jewel to become human and instead allowed herself to love him the way he already was. that was one of the largest factors which let inukik down, to me. kikyo’s pride and inuyasha’s deep guilt for the tragedy of kikyo’s life weighed down on them both and made it impossible for them to grow and develop a bond like the one he forged with kagome.

moving onto what you said about inuyasha not loving kagome the same way he loved kikyo, in a way, i think that is true. inuyasha doesn’t love kagome in the same way that he loved kikyo, but the thing that people usually fail to understand is that isn’t a bad thing.

there are different kinds of love people can feel, romantic or not, and the fact that so many demons like the flower prince (or whatever the fucc his name was idk) recognised kikyo as the true love of his life is simply because inuyasha struggled for so long with understanding his love for kagome.

kagome, being from the future, is completely different to anyone he’d ever met in his life. she is a person that is able to hand out affections easily and trust without falter, and it’s how her love for him never seems to waver no matter what he does that confuses him. the last time he was in a similar situation, kikyo went to kill him at the first misunderstanding they had, so to see kagome constantly loving and accepting him through anything, it’s a lot to process. especially for inuyasha, who spent two HUNDRED years alone and afraid, with everything that came within a few feet of him trying to kill him.

but kagome, she loves him through everything, and she constantly says things like: “i like you the way you are,” or “there’s nothing wrong with staying the way you are.” that is sheer love and unconditional acceptance of who he is, something he has never received, not even from his own brother, and it knocks him off his feet for a while. being with kagome makes him feel good, something he doesn’t associate with love because of his experience with kikyo, which is why inukag was so much of a slow burn in regards to the narrative.

so to conclude, kagome is not and never was a substitute for kikyo to inuyasha. he simply had to work out what his love for her meant and accept that he deserved the love she was offering, which he finally felt he could do towards the end of the story. belittling either inukag or inukik takes away from both of their stories, and in a way they kind of both received their happy endings, because kikyo finally found peace and moved on from her solitude and bitterness (*clenches fist* i still wish she’d lived dksksdks) and essentially managed to finally settle down and love inuyasha fully in her reincarnated life as kagome.

kikyo opened his heart to the idea of love, and kagome made him believe he did in fact deserve it, regardless of him being a hanyou.

#i hope this makes sense i tried #thanks for such a great ask!!! #asks #anonymous #i got mail #inukag #inukik #inuyasha #iy