#i didnt this time bc that essay would have been 3 times as long with me integrating the rewrite with canon. puzzle pieces u know

[ddejavvu]

ohh i have SUCH a controversial jennifer jareau opinion. and this is probably gonna be more like an essay. i wish i could say i was sorry.

everyone always says theyre anti jj slander, which is fine ofc, but just weird bc i NEVER see anyone slandering her. in my 3 years in the fandom, ive seen it happen maybe 5 times total, which sucks because she deserves so. much. more. hate.

(spoilers for *that* jeid plotline, as well as some other things)

in season 7, spencer tells her that she has mean girl vibes and she replies "i was a nice girl, especially to guys like you" which ALWAYS pissed me off because she literally just confirmed what he said? and everyone acts like it was a funny joke. she said that shit with her whole chest and meant it, and it wouldnt be *that* big of a deal if it was the only time. but shes consistently mean to him throughout the show, ignoring him, walking away, etc. spencer isnt even the only one shes like this to. and she just has a sense of superiority, idk how to describe it. just by the way she talks and interacts with those around her, you can tell. (while we're on that note, she also ignores her privileged a LOT. maybe not all the time, but theres been multiple times where she acts like she went through hell to get where she is. other than her sister passing, she had it completely easy. in terms of resources, opportunities, etc., she was basically born with a golden spoon in her mouth.)

in s14 when she confesses to spencer that shes always been in love with him, it just makes my blood boil. obviously he had been over her a long time (imo), but that was something she should've kept to herself bc it just brought alllll those feelings back to the surface. not to mention that hes the godfather of her children, and shes married, and will probably (definitely) doesnt know how she feels. thats literally emotional cheating on her part, even though reid didnt reciprocate it, it was still wrong of her to be that close to him without will knowing how she really felt.

there are other things i dont like abt her too, but those are the main things and im trying to keep this as short as possible. but i literally cant stand her, shes by far my least favorite character, and everyone acts like shes an angel sent from heaven, when really shes just a privileged bitch.

i like JJ a lot (i want her to be my mom </3) but i do agree with several of your points - she's definitely not the worst character, each and every character has a list of flaws that we could make, so this by no means makes her the worst, but it does make me angry <3

i just rewatched that 'mean girl' episode!! she doesn't even hesitate before saying 'guys like you', which, you're totally right, means he was right, and she was definitely a mean girl in high school. or even if she didn't say any of it out loud, she was still silently judging 'guys like him' and in high school you can always tells who's silently judging you. they're teenagers. they're not silent about it. the nasty looks they give you?? oh man. but i do think that the blame for ignoring spencer needs to be placed on all of the team members, because they do it all the time too, it's not just her. she has some pretty bad moments with him, but it's definitely something they all do and she shouldn't take the full blame

lmao don't talk about jeid. the writers actually deserve the death penalty for that, god it was so nasty and weird. i know that it was something she confessed in the heat of the moment, like she wasn't sure she was gonna make it out alive and didn't wanna die without saying it but ??? WHY WOULD YOU PUT IT ON HIM TO DIE THREE SECONDS AFTER FINDING OUT ??? like great it's off your chest but now he's gonna spend the (very short) rest of his life thinking about it?? AND THEN THEY DIDN'T EVEN DIE LMFAO SO HE WAS JUST STUCK WITH THAT !! and yeah!! will!! what about will!! or her kids!! it was so... writers i'm watching you...

one scene of hers that really pissed me off was in reid's kidnapping two-parter in s2 (the hankel incident) where she was almost attacked by those rabid (?) dogs and she shot them and she's obviously shaken up and she tries finding reid and realizes what happened and she feels so much guilt for splitting up with him - which was not her fault, she didn't know and should not be held responsible for what happened to him - that she started trying to make other people mad at her?? she cornered derek who was grieving and stressed at the loss of his best friend and they're both sleep deprived and she says something like 'admit it, you hate me, you think it's my fault' AND I???? GIRL. he is being so nice to you?? he was literally like oh honey if you need time off i know you're really shaken up and we can take care of this and and and AND SHE WAS LIKE oH yeah suRe just admit it i'm the worSt everybody hATEs mE- I WAS... this is not about you. go get therapy for the dog attack that you just almost suffered?? do not stand around a crime scene and pester the victim's best friend and delay the investigation because you're feeling guilty. go talk to someone about it. take a few days off. again, i totally get that she was shaken up and hopped up on adrenaline, but everyone told her to go get some rest and she was like no i think i will make myself the problem instead <3

all of that being said i still love her </3 i was not kidding when i say that i wish she was my mom holy shit i would have loved to grow up as her kid but she definitely has her flaws just like the rest of the BAU, and logical, critical breakdowns of a characters flaws aren't slandering, they're analysis, so i think everybody needs to stop shitting on people who criticize or analyze their faves lmao

send me your unpopular fandom opinions

#mei's mail #ask game

[awesomehoggirl]

hi prim its raxz... checking in. whats going on in your life these days? i had my 17th birthday last week and im been starting to think seriously about what i want to do after i graduate... are you glad you moved away from home for uni? any general advice? i know what career i want which is the hard part i suppose. have something i drew while out for lunch today. cheers

HIIIIIII RAXZ <333 love the cute little drawing i have attached my own. i would say i am happy i moved a little further away bc it has allowed me to become more independent and really branch out and meet new people but there is a lot to consider... i think costs of travel are super important to think abt, my trip is only abt 3-4 hours and costs me under £20 each time which is very useful as a girl who loves to go home at every opportunity LOL. taking a gap year after u graduate if u arent sure where u wanna go/what exact degree u wanna pursue/if uni is for you is a good option u shouldnt rule out, it can be super good to have the extra time to work or research and i honestly wish id taken one lowkey. if u do decide to go straight away do not drop out in the first semester unless u are 100% sure it isnt for you… bc i almost did when my mental health was super bad and now im sooo glad i didnt LMAO. going to uni is a really tough change but it does kick you into a new stage of development and i have loved my experience so far (Apart from the past term which has been the worst few months of my life but that has nothing to do with uni) :3 also i would say 100% pick something you really enjoy, doesnt have to be tailored to ur ideal career (but that helps if u have it figured out already), i did that instead of picking something more practical and i genuinely love all my classes and essays so so much!! Sorry long post but if u have anymore questions feel free to send moar asks or dm yaaaay

[hanaasbananas]

saw a post earlier about how well behaved you were in school/how often you got in trouble and I can't find it again BUT it made me think of a couple of times I got completely REAMED by my teachers.

NUMBER ONE

One time when I was in year 6 so..11? I think? it was 2008/9, I'd just discovered Fruits Basket and was practically in love with Kyo Sohma. That's fine, right? Perfectly normal experience

UNTIL we got set a homework task to write a short 1000 word essay on any subject and what did I choose?

Well. I chose to copy and paste the ENTIRE Wikipedia article about Fruits Basket. The whole thing. And then I painstakingly went through my entire document, removing every single hyperlink so that "Mrs M won't know that I didn't write this and will be so impressed by how much i wrote". ARE YOU SURE. ARE YOU SURE HANAA

she did notice. Almost immediately when I rocked up with a STACK of paper and everyone else had like, one page and I still had the GALL to show off "how much work I did" to everyone else on my table. where is this confidence NOW??? when I NEED IT.

anyway turns out my friend ALSO plagiarised her paper about tigers but she didn't take out the hyperlinks so we both got yelled at for 10 minutes during break, absolutely sobbed our little hearts out and then were told to wash our faces and calm down in the last 5 mins lmaoo

I think the funniest part of this story is that Mrs M ended up being one of my favourite primary school teachers, though I never plagiarised a Wikipedia article again.

NUMBER TWO

The second instance I got absolutely WRECKED by a teacher was in year 8 dance. Yes, dance. I absolutely LOATHED dance. Despised it. Was absolutely HORRIFIED when I started secondary school in year 7 and found out it was MANDATORY for two years.

(Essentially all subjects are mandatory until u choose ur gcse options, at which point you only do the core subjects aka maths english science and then 4 other subjects of ur choice. most schools have u choose options in year 9 bc year 10 is when you sit your gcse exams but THANK GOD my school made u choose in year 8 so you could have a practise run with the subjects you chose in year 9 and change them if u wanted to)

I didn't mind doing drama, (though i HATEd having to take ur shoes and socks off in the classroom), didn't mind ICT or food tech or graphic design or DT or geography. I HATED dance.

And also, unfortunately when I started my secondary school the lessons were LONG. The day was from 8.45-2.45 (unless you were an older student and had later lessons. Having a maths lesson at 2.45 and watching everyone going home SUCKED.) and for the first 3 years while I was there each lesson was AN HOUR AND A HALF. NINETY MINUTES. So you only had 3 lessons a day if you finished at 2.45 but they were really painfully long.

(They did switch to 1 hour lessons eventually and and sometimes you'd have a double period of a subject but that was fine.)

ANYWAY back to the story- despised dance, had to do it anyway. I surilvived one year, but then I had a stricter teacher in year 8 and one time we had an end of year assessment where we'd been practising dance lifts all term and she gave us 45 mins to pair up and come up with a dance sequence that had lifts in it and then perform it to the whole class at the end.

and the thing is, I was (am) a little heavy. So I knew I'd be the one doing the lifting. No problem. Until it came to pairing up because I was shy and quiet I only hung out w two other girls.

do you see where this is going?

those two friends of mine (TRAITORS) paired up so I was left with another shy muslim girl who I vaguely knew as a friend of a friend. She was lovely, honestly but things Didnt Go Well.

and by that I mean she couldn't lift me and wouldn't let ME lift HER so we could come up with something, anything. and I was CHRONICALLY shy. so I wasn't about to go tell the teacher, then my partner would hate me!!

time comes to perform. all of us sit on the floor against the mirror as the teacher goes down the line and sees everyone's performance.

we were last

we had nothing

"what were you doing for the last 45 minutes then girls? everyone else managed to do it, why didn't you?"

i tried to explain as articulately as I could, which is v impossible when you are a 12 year old trying not to start crying as you are BEING YELLED AT IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE (SILENT) CLASS. my partner didn't cry but she also didn't tell the teacher why she didn't let me lift her.

naturally, we were given detention. and this was in the time when detention was the same amount of time as a lesson. AN HOUR AND A HALF DETENTION. I was distraught. What would my mum say when I had to stay late after school? I'd NEVER gotten a detention before I couldn't believe it!!

the ultra humiliating part was this was at the end of the day and we all got changed in the dance studio, they had like, open lockers at the back to put your stuff in so I couldn't even leg it out of class at the end I had to get changed next to my classmates all while they're sneaking glances at me and I'm just. Sobbing.

I think the teacher did feel bad about how much I was crying though because she told us that she'd email us to let us know when the detention would be and never did. I skipped class the week after just in case she remembered but I escaped unscathed.

#banana speaks 🍌 #or: hanaa goes off on too many tangents oops #legitimately i asked my mum ab the dance thing the other day and she was like #'omg yeah you came home an absolute WRECK and said you had to tell me something-that it wasnt your fault but you'd gotten in trouble' #'and i thought something REALLY BAD had happened but you just got detention' #but yeah honestly i was glad to never set foot in that dance studio again #until year 11 tho when our House Leader made all of yr11 go in there on the morning of first exams #and made us all do the cha cha slide and also I am the music man before we went to our exam shshd

[everythingsinred]

I'm gonna print out your gakuen alice essays and bind into a book and I will treasure and read it everyday for the rest of my numbered days holy sh-

Thank you for saving me 🥺

OMG! thank you for saying that ;-; im really so happy that these essays are appreciated. i actually started writing them like 7 years ago (early drafts that have been revised since then) but kept them to myself bc i didnt think anybody would wanna read something so long. AND YET! ive been proven wrong time and time again. if my essays saved you, then you're very welcome <3

#part 2 of mikan essays will be posted today! #flyingspacewhale #answered #ga #every kind message makes my heart skip a beat <3 so thank u very much!

[n0ct0urn1quet]

wip ask game 1 2 5 6 9 14 20 26

1. what’s your longest wip right now? 

i dont know if this means longest as in like how many pages/words long or if this means longest as in the wip ive been working on for the longest amount of TIME but uhhh the the answer to the latter would be blazing sky (aka the first "book" in the series of Stories im writing which i finally made an arc title for, silence of the stars) which i created back in like 2017? 2018? and though ive rewritten it a handful of times thats the one ive been working on the most lately . the actual longest thing im working on (long as in lots of pages) isnt particularly blazing sky itself but is part of that whole Arc, the thing that im writing right now is cedarstar's whole death scene from mothwhiskers pov which from what i remember is like . 9 and a half pages long? yeah <3

2. what’s your shortest wip right now? 

again dont know if this means short as in how many pages/words or short as in the wip that ive been working on the Least but ig for the latter question the one thats been around much much shorter than blazing sky or anyting else is the stuff that im writing about berryclan/mintclan/shiveringclan/gustclan bc with that stuff i only created it within the past month or so so nothings rly come out of it yet. but as for shortest physical wip . i have no idea honestly KJDSJKLJKLG bc thers a thousand documents in google docs that are just like rly short 2 paragraph things that i juts wrote down bc i had those ideas in my mind n didnt know where to go with them so i just . plopped them down n didnt work on them after that JSLDJKG

5.  do you listen to music while writing or no? if yes, what’s your favorite kind of music to listen to? 

i try not to listen to music while writing bc my rbain focuses too much on the lyircs and The Music rahter than actually writing . i usually listen to random youtube videos for some kind of background noise that i can Easily tune out (usually i go fro longer 1-3 hour video essays that ive already watched before or something so i can just zone out while listening to them and dont have to focus on the Words, either that or i jst put on like. one of those "surviving 100 days in minecraft hardcore!!!!!" videos, which is weirdly what ive been listening to lately SKJDJKLLKG)

6. write 3 sentences of any wip you’d like, post it in the answer. 

Rosestar let out a wail and Specklestar looked as if she were about to vomit as blood began to pool out around Cedarstar’s head. Mothwhisker stared down at him in pure shock and horror, and behind him Darkfrost simply stared at Cedarstar with no expression on his face. Mothwhisker looked up at the sky and only then, after Cedarstar had been brutally murdered by not only another clan leader, but his own ex-mate and the mother of his son, did Starclan begin to cover the moon with dark gray clouds.

^ from thge cedarstars death thing. teehee!

9. what are you struggling with the most in finishing your current wip(s)? 

for a lot of the stuff i write i struggle with finding a clear ending or a good place to end things and i struggle writing stuff after i get to like. the climax of the chapter. like with cedarstar's death im struggling writing darkfrost's reaction and snowstar's reaction n everyone's reaction to his death and struggling to find a good place to End Things so its juts . in wip limbo rn KSJLDLJKLKG

14. what’s your favorite thing about writing? 

making my ocs go through horrible terrible trauma <33333 projecting my issues onto my sillly little guys <3333333 loooks at mistyleaf and meadowmoon specifically theyr'e the worst of the bunch <3333333333

(but fr i think my favorite thing about writing is writing like dialogue n stuff. im not good with being subtle when it comes to dialogue, like im very much. making characters be upfront and straightforward when they rly shouldnt be (such as i wanted to write a thing where mistyleaf and heatherheart are talking after darkwing's death and its from mistyleaf's pov n heatherheart is making it all about herself completely unintentionally and mistyleaf, now knowing she's being unintentional about her thoughts, blows up at her and is like "well he's MY brother he's MY family you aren't the ONLY one who's grieving" but im finding it hard to be. subtle ig? and having heatherheart not realize she was saying that stuff and upsetting mistyleaf while also making mistyleaf accidentally lash out thinking heatherheart was being genuine abt being all like "oh im sosad im sooooo sad that darkwing is dead he was MY mate and the father of MY kits im sooooooooo sad that hes dead" and not addressing mistyleaf's grief) but aside from that i do lke writing dialogue it is fun :])

20. how do you usually come up with story ideas? 

gonna be honest i have no fuckign idea someimtes shit just comes to me. like fuckinnnn owlstar's whole story about her being a young leader with a dead father and her not being able to live up to her clans' expectations of her and her clan not accepting her as a leader bc she's only like a year and a half moons old just like. completely came out of nowhere. with older oc's, specifically like mothheart and her kits, and shellstorm, they were created shortly after i read certain warriors books. shellstorm was created after i read crookedstar's promise and she was heavily, perhaps TOO heavily, inspired by crookedstar's story. mothheart and her kits were created shortly after i read moth flight's vision and also i was inspired by recently reading long shadows + sunrise where the secret of jay lion and holly being the kits of leaf and crow was revealed. with newer ocs though they just kinda. came out of nowhere.

ig though if i had to answer this, id say sometimes i just like. put myself in my characters shoes and look at things from their perspectives. and i go with stuff from there. like earlier today with the clangen stuff with copperleaf riverlight and clovershade, when i saw clovershade being Disappointed In Copperleaf and then saw copperleaf Spending A Lot Of Time With Riverlight i was like hmm. okay pretend im clovershade now. okay whats the first thing that comes to my mind for me (clovershade) to be mad at copperleaf. okay lets say he and i (clovershade) both had crushes on riverlight and when i (clovershade) died he became mates with her and used my death for her to feel sorry for him and become his mate. boom. story created <3

26. is there a wip you’d like to see recreated in a new medium (ie. movie, audio drama podcast, web series, animation, musical)? 

i would fucking LOVE to turn my stuff into like a comic or even an animated series (not like on tv series but like. an animated series put on yt or something) . but alas i wouldnt be good at updating a comic regularly and animating is sohard but . idk! for now it wil all stick to writing <3

[baby-prophet]

Hello! haven't sent a message in a while, but hope you have been enjoying a nice weekend \^o^/ oh and i saw u mentioned donuts a bit ago and was curious what ur fav kind is (personally i can't resist a good bavarian cream). Also unrelated but have you ever seen the show mushishi? I'd recommend it if you haven't. okay that's all have a good night! ╰(￣ω￣ｏ)

omg hii!! my weekend was ok had a good saturday and a not so great but over all ok sunday 👍 cramps kicked my ass and i stayed in bed all day yesterday but thats ok. i dont feel much better now but i am going to bed early tonight just to get some rest lol

today both my professors complimented my writing tho!!! my art history professor mentioned in class that I had written a really good paper and my writing history professor said he likes how i insert myself into my writing and how i'm not afraid of being candid when writing.. he was like i love when writers are vunerable, you really feel like youre getting to know them ( this was after he had us read out the essays about a city's birth and the indigenous people who lived there before... and I wrote half about that and half about living in richmond and how I teetered on the verge of becoming an alcoholic and how I chainsmoked out my apartment window and was extremely lonely to the point of hanging out at the robert e lee memorial alone in the dew covered grass at 3 am just to see the stars and how it grounded me when I was feeling especially fragile and untethered and how I would adorn my eyelashes in glitter to create my own personal constellations when i didnt feel like walking 30ish minutes to get the the racist statue LOL)

wow i got sidetracked real bad lmao.... as for donuts, lately I've been a plain old glazed girly. theyre basic but idk whatever. I used to hate them because of sensation of extremely sticky fingers make me feel like im get electrocuted but a bunch of tiny nails just underneath my skin... but now i like ok with it bc i love them so much. at the farmers market theres these weird big and skinny ones that are so fucking good. I'm really craving one right now. ....... i love bavarian cream too but I havent had a decent one in a depressingly long time.

ive never seen mushishi but ive added it to my list! ty!!

#norm.allie #asks #anonymous #my art history professors was like ok im noting going to “out” this student #but one of yall wrote a very good and insightful essay about this #i think i over share bc how little I talk to people and how i long to be seen LOL #like i didd it again just now #looked up my writing professors birthday and hes also a pisces.... lmao #im constantly writing like *teen valley girl voice* dear diary.......... #im constantly writing at least here like that one andrew garfield interview where he talks about soulmates #and doesnt take a breath at all LOL #in my school papers I use em dashes and other punctuation to help with the flow of it #god sorry for the novel i just love to talk apparently #college owns

[rrxnjun]

IM SORRY FOR ANSWERING SO SUPER LATE LIFE GOT SO HECTIC ALL OF THE SUDDEN☹️

STILL WITH THE TAKE THE STAIRS FIC U GAVE ME LIFE WITH IT ACTUALLY IT WAS SO NICE TO JUST TURN MY BRAIN OFF AND READ IT SO I THANK U FOR IT!! and like actually need a jaemin in my life istg!! AND THE SAME GOES FOR THE TEASER OF UR NEW CHENLE FIC!!! IT ALREADY SEEMS SO FUN!! SO EXCITED ABOUT IT!!! 🥳🤭

I AGREE I WOULD ALSO RATHER JUST GOOGLE THE END OF THE SHOW!!

AHH I HOPE U FOUND SOME ARTISTS SINCE THEN!!! AND THANK U SO MUCH FOR TAKING TIME OUT OF UR DAY AND TRANSLATING FOR ME!! IM SURE U ARE VERY BUSY AS WELL SO THANK U SO MUCH I REALLY APPRECIATE IT!!!!🥹🥹💝💓 and my god the lyrics are so☹️☹️☹️ it's just such a great song and now it even got so much better with understanding it!!!🥲

WELL IF IT DOES HAPPEN I WILL BE HERE XD parents smh /j (but like actually i understand them cuz traveling alone can be risky☹️) thank u i hope we will figure something out if it does happen🥹🥹

IM GLAD THAT U ARE DONE WITH ONE OF UR ESSAYS ALREADY!! AND I HOPE SINCE MY LAST ASK U STILL ARE DOING GOOD WITH UR SCHOOL WORK AND STUFF🥳

I LOVE UR POSTS THERE LMAO SO DONT BE SORRY and ofc i agree!!! zach was my fav from the why dont we boys🤭 OH MY I HAVENT HEARD ABOUT THE VAMPS IN AGES damn now i'm gonna go and listen to them😵‍💫(also saw that u turned into a treasure stan🫣 and ur take on jikjin!! it's such a great song glad u listened to it!!!)

(liebestraum anon💕 and sorry if i disappear again and for writing a lot i swear i will try and keep it short for once☹️)

AHH ITS TOTALLY OKAY!!!! cant say i didnt miss you but i ofc understand that u have your own life and responsibilities and such,, so dont worry about it🤍🤍 AND THANK U SM AGAIN!!!

DJDJSJ MY CHENLE FIC IS FUN BUT THEN IT GETS DEPRESSING REAL QUICK SO UHHH HOPE YOU'RE READY FOR SOME ANGST ;-; (also i started rewriting liebestraum. just thought i'd let you know<3)

im super glad u enjoyed my translation!! the lyrics are really screamable in my opinion,,, and i also hope i did them justice however i bet i did a better job than all of the ones i saw online :p its not the best artistic lyricism but i like it nonetheless DJSK sometimes u need simple songs to jam to.

travelling alone COULD be risky </3 me and my uni friends randomly travelled to vienna last week because it was warm out and we thought our seasonal depression was finally over and i love me some spontaneous decisions but also it was so anxiety inducing bc it was my first time going abroad with no supervision 😭😭 we had SO much fun but also the stress we were put through to find the bus platform back home ??? never again. was so bad that i broke my 5 month streak of not smoking bc i had to calm myself down somehow and then i was put through the stress of buying cigarettes in german when i caNT SPEAK GOOD GERMAN but 10/10 i would do it again and it made me more confident abt travelling with friends so i WILL drag my equally spontaneous uni friends to budapest as soon as i can. (please tell me they speak at least a little english there)

I AM ACTUALLY DONE W 4 ESSAYS NOW WHOOP WHOOP ‼‼‼ 4 MORE TO GO BUT IM DOING WELL NO STRESS SO FAR. HOPE YOUR SCHOOL IS GOING WELL TOO!

wait do u rlly bc i think im so annoying on there sometimes like girl chill😭😭 but ZACH WAS ALWAYS MY FAV TOO altho i did have a daniel phase. I havent listened to the vamps in ages either i should catch up or sum ;-;

omg dont mention the teumefication of bar i wont admit it to myself yet DHSKSK however jikjin is now my fav song and i fear seeing my 2023 spotify wrapped bc of it now. ive also been watching a concerning amount of treasure map and finding myself in love with jihoon but thats...not important rn.

ill be waiting for u liebestraum anon!!! dw abt sending long asks i always look forward to them🤍 hope your days are filled with joy mwah

#💌ask #liebestraum anon

[bawkrya]

Uuuh something something flag (i want to hear about cdramas)

ok HI well you caught me at the most devastating time where im fixated on the worst of the three cdramas i rotate in my brain (or ginal sin again) LOL, im going to force yall to sit down and perceive my hyperspecific version of chi zhen (my girlfriend) in my brain

SO! if you have the patience take my essay length "summary" of OS/and how i perceive it to have more context for who chi zhen is and what he does

my transgender king. and NOT in the way u wld expect. chi zhen is like. Removed from a lot of things, but i think she esp wld be for LGBT stuff & similar topics. like he didnt know what a bisexual was until one of the girls at his club explained it to him removed. If you put this man through covid 2020 lockdown he would come out trans in some way which is WHAT I DO TO HIM!

ive kind of given her my gender which is no gender but in the opposite way where hes transfem vs me being transmasc. she still aligns with more masculine things but also sophie called him her 'favorite pretty girl' as a joke once and he had to sit down and dissect the feelings it put in his brain. i literally use she/her or he/him for her depending on what flows better with the sentence in my brain.

if i do commit to the rewrite though it wld be very very subplot that IS noted, but he literally wouldnt even have time to properly think about it in depth bc hes u know, trying to kill someone, someones trying to kill him, etc............ but also for the rewrite i am wanting to do 'spinoff' where i jst invest some writing into 'downtime' story for like. character development. Filler basically but its not being injected as to prevent the rewrite from getting too long bc I Promise You It Will.

2. going 2 go over this before my actual next point i wanted to go over but this mf has autism. he wears sunglasses p much everywhere & honestly jst seems like he has a sensitivity to light. the way he goes about certain social instances in the show. and i dont think we were shown Much of how she is in the courtroom but she very much seems to be a patterns sort of person when it comes to solving situations.

also i am autistic.

3. the actual thing iwanted to go over: herspecial interest is colognes/perfumes and he can identify a VERY good portion of such jst by smelling it. i literally dont know why this is wht i chose for him but hes Definitely like insanely prissy about personal hygiene and (covers the show with my hand) dresses herself well and i just think he shld have a cologne/perfume collection.

chi zhen doesnt really have too many REAL personal belongings, hes been in jail, where he lives is very purposely hidden so he doesnt really have an Option to keep many personal items. But. I think he wld have a pretty decent collection of different cologne/perfume. which is fueled when people give him such for birthdays/holidays

i dont think she wld specifically have a preference bc different perfumes suit different people, on top of different styles of perfumes and all that. ipersonally dont know enough abt perfumes to even go in depth for it but she would kno the intricacies. She would.

its not smth he like talks abt all the time bt by god u ask him one (1) thing related to it and it can turn into a good 45 minute conversation b4 she realizes whats happening and immediately goes :| BC IT GETS HIM EMBARRASSED ........... but he likes it a lot and of the ppl who kno abt her interest they usually ask her for suggestions on it bc she likes assigning certain scents 2 people. like a planned filler scene i got is based on her getting like really suddenly angry/antsy while trying to go over a case and its literally bc lu li unexpectedly changed colognes w/o saying anything and he fucking lectures him for it

but yeah um i thikn that is all i am goign to willingly post abt publicly for my hyperspecific hcs for this guy bc 4 some reason i think the cringe police will come and kill my ass if i go into anymore depth. i lvoe this mf so fucking much i want to dissect him like you would tear off a young branch from a tree and split its bark in order to see the stringy inside

#Asks #Anonymous #idk how to tag these................... well heres my most girlypop man #that is a lie i have more girlypop characters than this but thatsok #also very very short but the majority of things im thinking abt when it comes to her is like. really weird out of context of the show #the day i find another autistic person that i can bait into watching os

[saitolover]

🩸finished van helsing’s route!

thoughts under the cut bc it became a bit long than i thought it would be

one thing id like to say first is that wow! playing through the routes is going much quicker ever since ive finished the common route lmao felt like i was playing it for a week, while each route is taking me a day or two (thanks to binge playing now). didnt mind though tbh, i loved the common route. this game has become one where i can smile stupidly at my screen while looking at my fav 2d characters <3

so onto my thoughts about van helsing’s route, yay! i loved the angst and the drama that was going on in it. it was great (and extremely heavy and dark) to hear about van’s past AND LITERALLY how aleister was just. controlling him. i had my suspicious of him after seeing some of the bad endings, and how cardia or someone else would be like, “why are you doing this/why are you here…?” etc. but never expected him to be conditioning van wtf. also was interesting to see more abt finis, im wondering more on what his secret really is!

a little note: ive always been a fan of the more “colder” charas in otome games. cue my username, though now that im thinking abt it, my favs arent always like that lmao. okay ignore this ramble

but that aside, wow. the romance had me mad. not that pressed lmao but there are times where i wanted to shake my screen and yell at van for always pushing away cardia and being so mean TT i think i get it tho, man is completely afraid of losing another person he cares about. trauma! so i was finally so happy when he was like, okay fine i do love you cardia. but then he knocked her out oml. so glad that cardia came in and honestly i want to date cardia i have a fat crush on her. she cared so much about van and was willing to sacrifice herself (which is kinda a reoccurring thing, i noticed. makes me kinda sad bc i want her to value herself more too <3 which makes me happy when she says she and her LI will survive together no matter what. cardia is a fighter and she wont go down!!! love to see how she realizes that she’s capable of love, and that she isnt a monster <3 getting validated by others and starting to realize her emotions!) okay let me shut up now before i write a whole essay about cardia bc this is a van post ???

what was i talking abt again. oh right, anyways! stop it game the amount of angst in this route… im in pain. so i was happy when these two got their happy ending. it actually feels kinda weird now to see van kinda being in love now lmao bc he’s always been so cold and hid his emotions. we get blushing sprite of him and him being more romantic and flirting with cardia and im like. whoa who is this guy HAHA but im not complaining. his extra was great too, cardia was so cute and i felt embarrassed for her as well lol.

and i think that is pretty much what i have to say about this route! played the last couple chaps when i first woke up and am writing this immediately after i finished them so yeah! and one last note… i cannot believe they were robbed of a kiss LIKE ???? pls dont tell me everyone else is missing a kiss too 😭😭 im sad. i want them to hold hands and kiss too okay. that is all!

small update: omg i forgot to mention delly 😭 im so glad that van helsing’s route talked more about delly, his feelings, and how much he’s really been suffering :(((

#catplays.txt #catplays.txt + code:realize #code:realize #abraham van helsing

[chanyoungies]

u have not missed a thing beloved ! vrvr + 1, 6, and 19 pls 💖

sigh of relief ... i'm so glad i hate missing things

1. who’s your bias?

that's . a very funny question haha can we move on...? it's dongheon but is it also yongseung? or is it perhaps gyehyeon ! and what about hoyoung? who knows, roll the dice it can be any of those four !

6. your favorite song and why?

......... what if i say my beauty.... like ik it's an ost but ... WHAT an ost !!!! ... she's so good she's so great she's so :D and so (sparkles) and so !!!!!! and so (hearts) you know? but also photo. she's so good ... obsessed . but also so gravity !!!!!!!!!!! she's so . like . she's Very emotionally charged BUT at the same time she manages to be very comforting as well? . everything is so waay ... u know? <3 i lov her a lot. there's like 5 others but i'll stop here for now this is my selection for today <3 sorry to privacy and skydive and connect and my face and lay back and wish u were here and fine and heart attack and trigger and o and underdog (that is not 5 that is 11)

i said too much without rlly saying Anything of substance for 19 so. under the cut

19. favorite choreo?

ok let me start by saying that i don't think it's gonna be her but i've watched the gbtb dance practice at least a hundred times by now and i'm not even exaggerating i think we went over a hundred a while ago bc at some point i would watch her at least once a day if not more nd then there's all the times i rewatched her multiple times to stare at members separately and there's times i watched her repeatedly just to destroy my ears but with the need to stare at smth at the same time so like . she's ended up being very important to me over time as u may imagine . But However . let me go watch the dance practices now kjsf OKAY so what i discovered is that i'm rlly a big fan of how they end their choreos .. ? also for the record there seems to be no vrvr choreo that i actively dislike or find boring ... (so that made it harder for me rip) !! there's things i rlly like in most of them!! they're all very fun to watch they're all engaging.... gbtb was the most intense And she was the most familiar obviously so she's getting points for that... (and like i think i could write a full essay on her .) o was rlly rlly nice and there's things i Really like about her a Lot but she may be overdoing it with the body rolls? lay back is rlly addictive there's a lot of details? about her i like? mayb her musicality? idk im just saying words rn . and like she's obviously a classic. there's much to like about connect also !!! nd im a big fan of the beginning of the chorus in my face whatever theyre doing there is oddly so nice to watch.. HOWEVER ! the shocking truth that i have just learned. the answer that is a surprise even to me . i think i have to say that my faves are thunder & get away ?? which is so funny to me because those were the two that i was like yeah i dont think its gonna be them so i almost didnt even open them . for thunder it's like ... i started watching her and i immediately felt something... like ... i saw gbtb and o and trigger before her and those are soso so beloved to me but i was simply enjoying them and when thunder started i like Felt something like . inside of me change like . this is it . it's her . it must be her . ?? wish i could explain it but i can't . as for get away she's the last one i watched and like i was just like getting to a point where i was like ok i wanna be done with this ive been watching these dance practices for so long now and while i do love them im getting kinda tired i need a little break but i wanna be done with this first ..... but so i played her expecting to be at least a little bored or wanting her to end quickly but like ......... i enjoyed her a lot instead???

#(it's not gye i choose to believe that my infatuation is temporary) #for the choreos sorry that my answer is so feeling based but like its what made most sense nd #otherwise theres just a lot of things to point out in like literally every single choreo they have like . Help theres cool moments even in #even in tag tag tag ... like i counted on her to b boring but shes not like . why . #thank u eri i lov u #cherrin 🍒 #millie's rep

[mistermaxwellboucherdieasilived]

Skippy that's a good idea bc I could go on and on and on about Opal's connection with that particular symbol

#i didnt this time bc that essay would have been 3 times as long with me integrating the rewrite with canon. puzzle pieces u know #Marcus eating the last of the mac and cheese = Marcus moving out to live with Opal. basically

[aliwritesss]

~ Labyrinth

Pairings: Eric x reader

Genre: fuckboy au!

Warnings: angst, slightly suggestive, slow burn, swearing

Based on this AU! Highly recommended to read it before you start the series, but can be read alone.

1/? Masterlist

-“… And remember! The deadline for the essay is in three weeks.”- You hear your History teacher’s voice but no one listens to him. The bell just ringed and that meant freedom.

-“ It’s Friday!!! Let’s do something fun.” You hear Kevin’s voice next to you. You thank the heavens and stars to have him in your life, you don’t know what you would have done without him all this time.

-“ What are you thinking?”

-“ Well… You know, everyone’s been on the edge these past months with the exams and all. So Juyeon thought I’d be fun to do a small gathering, only close friends.” He says with the smallest voice and you feel all your body tense up. If you knew one thing is that you couldn’t go to parties, not yet. Not when it’s been so long since you’ve seen him and you’re actually starting to move on. To wake up and not think of him.

-“ It sounds fun! But I think I’m gonna pass this time, I better start working on this assignment.”

-“ Cmon (Y/N), it’s been a month. You gotta go to your old self, I miss you. I miss us having fun.” It pains your heart to hear Kevin, you’d love to have the balls to go to their dorms and be yourself, to dance again till you can’t stand up, to laugh freely but you feel that the spark inside of you has died and you’re afraid that if you go, it won’t light up anymore.

-“ I promise you I’ll go back to my old self. You’ll get back your partner in crime, my little moon.” You say hugging him and exiting the class. -“ Just give me a little bit and you’ll get back your star.”

-“ The world better get ready once the moon and star duo comes back.” He says giving you one of his best smiles and you feel a little bit better. You’ve known him for so long and clicked since then. One day you two were in class and someone said you looked like the team rocket from Pokémon, always together being mischievous. And since then you baptized your friendship as the moon and star duo.

As you walk outside you feel his comment nag you in the back of your head. “Why do I have to feel so bad when he’s doing fine? Was everything a lie? Did he truly love me?” These thoughts have been bugging you lately and you’re starting to get annoyed. You thought you were doing fine but sometimes these dark clouds will come and shake you down. And it seems like today was one of these days.

“ So… Juyeon is doing a gathering huh? Do you realize that it means half of the campus is going, right?”

-“ Yeah… We told him only close people and Changmin said that meant around 50 friends.” He says, rolling his eyes. -“ Thank god we have Sangyeon and Jacob to keep him in check or else It’d be a nightmare.” And that makes you laugh because it’s true, you remember one night you were staying the night in their dorms and suddenly Sunwoo and Chanhee started arguing about the smallest thing. Sangyeon only needed to look at them to make them stop. It was so funny, you don’t want to mess with an angry Sangyeon to be honest.

-“ And… Here we go. I knew it.” You hear Kevin’s annoyed voice. -“ They’re asking me to buy drinks, it seems like more people are coming tonight. I have to go now bubs, but we should do something fun this weekend okay? Just the two of us.” He says while hugging you and you nod. Maybe that’s what you need, to start slowly coming out of your cave.

You start making your way to your dorm thinking about the million things you have to get done in these two weeks and you can feel your anxiety already coming. The pressure you’ve been feeling these past few days it’s getting worse everyday. And the worst of it, it’s that you don’t have anyone to talk about it. Unconsciously, you touch your necklace, feeling a little bit better. You look down to the tiny shiny star and remember the night he gave it to you.

-“ I’ll be your star, ready to guide you even in the darkest times, even when there’s no moon shining.” He said softly in your neck. You smiled at him and looked at the charm. It was a little star filled with crystals. Stunning.

-“ When you feel like giving up, remember that I’ll be here with you. Faintly.” Eric said, touching your necklace.

“Where are you now? Where are you now when I need you the most?” You think for yourself, It’s not like you weren’t starting to move on from him, which you are doing. But you were not forgetting him, and you wish you could.

You wish you could erase all these sweet moments, act like nothing happened. Act like him, cold and unbothered. Why did him have to play you? Was everything a lie? Everything he said, was just a trap to only have fun with you? You couldn’t trust your memories, it seems like you only could remember the good ones.

But what about that night you two had a fight on a party because he was with this girl, laughing and talking the whole night while you were alone? You still remember his words: “ Stop being a pain in the ass, if I wanted to hook up with her dont you think I would have already done it?”. And you being a silly naive girl in love, acted like it didn’t hurt you. Like he didnt had the power to destroy you in matter of seconds if he wanted.

And that was the reason you broke up with him.

Everyone knew you were his girl and god forbid anyone who dared to touch you. But that’s it, you were only that, his girl. He didn’t bother to put a label, you were there for him and that was enough.

-“ Eric what are we doing?”- You asked him the night you two broke up.

-“ What do you mean?”-

-“ What are we doing together? What is this? Are we exclusive? Are we truly in a relationship?”- You asked trembling, you weren’t ready to hear his answer.

-“ Not this again (Y/N). I told you I don’t want to talk about it and you keep bringing this up. I said you are my girl and that should be enough.”-

-“ But it isn’t. It isn’t when there’s a queue of girls waiting for you to get tired of me and drop me like a toy. And I had enough, I need to know what I am to you.” You said sitting in his bed.

-“ You are making me tired with all these questions. I said drop it, (Y/N). You know how I am and still chose to be here with me.”-

-“ I chose you bc you said that you couldn’t do this without me, Eric! You told me that I was special and-.”

-“ So? That gives you the right to be called my girlfriend?”- And that was the last straw. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing, it’s like someone snapped you back to reality. Like you just woke up from a beautiful dream and got hit with the true world.

He loved you, but not in the right way.

He cared about you, but not enough.

You got dressed and started to pick yoiur things while crying. You needed to get out as soon as possible, even if it was 3 in the morning.

-“Cmon (Y/N) don’t be like this. I got mad and you know I say things I regret later. Please let’s talk in the morning when we are calm, okay? Babe please-“

-“ Don’t touch me, Eric. I’ve had enough. I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep falling in love with you more and more when we are not in the same page. Not even in the same book.”- You said putting on your sweatshirt, well, his sweatshirt now yours.

-“ Are you serious? Are you going to be like this? After all we’ve been through?”-

-“ Exactly, after all we’ve been through you still think I don’t deserve to be your girlfriend. And let me correct you, you’re the one who doesn’t deserve to be my boyfriend. I’m tired of your shit.”

-“ I know you’re angry (Y/N) but I swear if you leave this room that’s it.”- He said staring at you. You gave him one last smile and closed the door. It was so late at night and you decided to bring this topic up… That was a stupid move of you to be honest, but it needed to be done.

You can feel your vision getting blurry with all the tears falling but you don’t care anymore.

-“ Star? Is everything ok?”- you feel Kevin’s sleepy voice coming from the other side of the hallway and you let out a sob. -“ Hey, Hey. What happened bubs? Why are you crying? Where’s Eric?”-

-“ I… I- I think we just broke up.” You said hugging him and starting to sob even harder.

- “ Oh gosh…” He said quietly while stroking your hair.

And after that everything was a blur, you only remember him and Haknyeon taking you to your dorm and sleeping there. Everyone knew what happened because they heard you two arguing but no one could bring the topic up. It was typical of you two to argue, but in a matter of hours everything was cleared. But this time was different and both of you knew it.

This time the damage was done and there was no going back now.

A/N: So it’s finally here!! The first chapter of this little series. Thanks to all of you for liking so much the AU and for telling me what you preferred to see on this series. It’ll be after the break up, but I thought it’d be nice to have a little context of why did the discussion happen and to see the dynamic of the relationship. Honestly speaking, I love Eric’s fuckboy vibes so much.. But still it pains me to see him acting this way :( I apologise for any typo or mistake! And remember you can ask in the comments or dms to be tagged and that requests are open!!

TAGLIST: @asherbl @fairycob @givememunjang

#tbz #the boyz #tbz x reader #tbznetwork #the boyz au #the boyz drabbles #the boyz imagines #the boyz scenarios #the boyz series #eric sohn #the boyz eric #tbz imagines #tbz scenarios #tbz eric #tbz angst #tbz drabbles

[gwemrys]

I love your Merlin & Gwen content! I was wondering if you had thoughts on if an earlier magic reveal had happened for them (I personally like to headcanon the perfect timing for that would have been the Lamia episode) and what you would’ve wanted out of it.

omg..... I DO HAVE THOUGHTS ON THAT.. MANY OF THEM 💖.......(shit this turned into an essay abt their soulmate bond first fbdnfj i promise i will get to the point somewhere in there LMAO.) passionate monologue in 3 2 1

LETS GO so from the moment gwen first saw merlin she has been ....strongly Intrigued by his strangeness. it was like WHAT a weirdo but i like it...... she saw him and immediately felt the burning desire to be connected to him in some way shape or form .. friendship? romance? WHATEVER JUST KEEP HIM! she was used to lunatics bc she lived in camelot but with this lunatic it was like. it was like ‘ive consistently had no clue what the fuck he is on about but his soul feels familiar and warm and safe and also he is crazy. and he radiates something unique and it feels connected to his strangeness but i cant seem to understand what it is? and it feels like the only thing that matters right now is to keep him close to me?’

so she does. shes there for him when he needs her and hes there for her when she needs him (she almost feels like he has helped her without telling her? as if a lot goes on that he doesnt talk about...)

as time goes on more n more impossible things happen when merlin is around and stories dont seem to add up at all..... she gets so used to merlin being Different that it doesnt rly occupy her mind, she kind of brushes it off bc yeah merlin is merlin :) but it remains in her subconscious and there are times when it resurfaces.

lamia is one of the episodes where i think she first realised that this “being different” of merlin was.... not as trivial as she had made it to be in her mind..

(but thinking of possible explanations scared her bc it Could mean that merlin had rly been forced to live with being in deathly peril every second of his life and on top of that having to keep it secret.. so she didnt ask for more answers and instinctively just pushed the idea to her subconscious before she could rly consider it)

fast forward to sword in the stone pt2. gwen is about to fatally lose her one-on-one battle with morgana when morgana flies back and the corridor proceeds to explode, both things for.... NO reason. it has to be. magic....?

which shouldve frightened her bc she is standing in the same corridor and there is no way to know if she is in danger too but before she has the chance to feel scared she hears a familiar voice say ‘you alright?’

and that. is when it clicked.

her shock wasnt due to the mere fact that merlin, her best friend, had magic. she was shocked because she had known.... and denied it to herself.. but she had always known in some way. and it had never made him seem scarier of more evil or in any way less deserving of her love and loyalty

as the dust in the corridor clears and she looks at merlin’s just as shocked face she remembers something morgana had said earlier: ‘not even emrys can save you now.’ — followed by her own magic failing her..?

both gwen and merlin seem too shocked to bring out any words for a few long seconds, and merlin seems anxious, almost unbelieving of what he had just done in front of her eyes, waiting for her to demand an explanation.

“merlin,” she manages to bring out. “thank you.” and her smile now comes more easily than her words did.

a simple confirmation that yes, she had seen. and no, she could never hate him for it.

his face hadnt completely shaken off the expression of shock yet when he cautiously returned the smile. she held out her hand and he took it, and they silently returned to the other part of the castle. later there would be time for talking. right now theres a battle going on.

#THANK U FOR ASKING ANON.......LOVE U💓 #anon #ask #merwen #merwendship

[standarrow]

abbacchio essay under the cut because he’s so important to me (god this is so long im sorry i have adhd i hope this is readable<3)

tl;dr being on how i think he healed and handled up until part 5 :”) + thoughts on his relationship to the team

tw!!! for all of the usual things that pertain to his backstory including: [death, alcohol abuse, police, ptsd/depression, etc]

i may be projecting<3 its fine

to start:

im not a fan of the way a lot of people handle handle abbas trauma and illness. the "entering a relationship fixes your problems<3" shit. or the romanticization of depression...i see both a lot, along with utilizing his substance issues as like a catalyst. i dont have to say why that shit isnt ok or healthy.

getting into it (because i want it to be this deep):

there is ... a lot of guilt that he shoulders around the death of his partner. someone he was friends with (and relied on him as a literal partner) died because He fucked up. that person wanted to protect him and died selflessly while he'd broken his own morals and he feels like it should have been him to pay for it. 

but he wasnt. and now he suddenly has two mistakes and blood on his hands. getting fired doesnt even Begin to fix that, so he withdraws because he cant trust himself, cant trust the institution he was already disillusioned from, and imo hes angry that he didnt get punished worse for his own crimes (but cops always get off easy)

bruno finds him in the worst place of his life and gives him a chance to put schedule in his life, to protect even if its not in the way he originally thought he would. he still doesnt trust himself, i do not think he takes to working with a partner easily (what if he fucks up again. he'll get bruno/narancia/fugo killed.) and i think that reflects in why moody blues isnt meant for combat. combat = danger. 

obligatory moody blues being an allegory for his trauma and ptsd surrounding the death of his partner.. constantly haunted by his own mistake and reliving that moment. heavily referencing his wish to redo, to know every detail of that prick he let bribe him that killed his partner, to have Control. because abbacchio isnt really about The Moment -- he's making sure the Moment doesnt have a chance to come to fruition. its nipping it in the bud before the weed can kill. he wants to make sure he can figure out whats going on First and protect. to figure out past events and prevent future danger.

starting to heal:

i’ve done a timeline previously: he graduates high school in 1998, six months for the police academy, 6 months before hes out again.. joins passione in december (rainy season) of 1999, and by december of 2000 (~4 months before part 5) hes like.... well. doing better in terms of his alcoholism. we see abbacchio by part 5 occasionally and seemingly comfortably enjoying a glass or two, which speaks that after some time working hes sort gained some..... confidence in his ability to keep his intake low. 

working for bruno means he cant drink as often or binge as much, hes needed and that structure keeps him in check, its not easy and yes he slips but its about and overall upwards climb because any progress is good progress... he builds a rapport with the team, comes to appreciate brunos role in giving him a chance and some peace of mind, sees himself in fugo, treats narancia like a little brother. relationships with others cant Fix your problems but friendship and structure can help, they can be there when you need it.

hes starting to trust himself more. and his relationship to fugo and nara were as crucial as his one with bruno is.

in purple haze feedback we see that he's been teamed up with fugo, and he knows fugos stand ability very well (see mirror man fight)... they Get each other and abbacchio sees a lot of his anger and distrust at himself in fugo, and easily calms fugo down when he gets upset (see mirror man episode in the car) 

fugo helped him trust himself and others more .. that other people arent Fragile and arent going to die on him every time they get into danger and its not His fault. he relies on fugo and vice versa. the kid is powerful but also a smart tactician and extremely capable. they Get each other and it helps abbacchio trust himself in combat situations and helps calm his paranoia about getting someone killed while working ... and nara is just sunshine. hes an annoying little brother but it helps him retain normalcy. some sense of like. not everything is doom and gloom

his depression and general self? depreciation perhaps doesnt leave him because those kinds of thoughts mould your brain a certain way.. they dont just go away without some work. but perhaps time with bruno helps him start to realise his worth, the way the team appreciates him and his ability. his self consciousness can start to fall away a little bit. i think by the time december of 2000 (a year after his recruitment by my timeline) hes like... a lot more comfortable with the schedule of his life, it helps him get out of bed, gives his brain a structure to latch onto. the responsibility of overseeing the younger ones and helping bruno gives him the sort of hope for this original goal of wanting to protect

@ bruno (in a more romantic sense perhaps + why i think he distrusts giorno so much)

his relationship to bruno isnt fucking “godlike savior<3″ because thats.... needless to say Very unhealthy. 

their relationship doesnt reach a point by where i think Either would even want to enter a relationship until about a year in (~4 months before part 5 begins)... theres a certain uncertainty i think bruno has with wanting to help abbacchio, he respects and cares about the other man and canonically sees him as his senior.. and i think theres a certain wall there that bruno isnt sure he wants to try to knock down, meanwhile abbacchio isnt sure when he built those walls but theyre safe (and what happens if you try to reach out?)

i think they sort of fall into it and its not... planned. its a little impulsive but it feels natural and they help each other because bruno is this comfort to abba, is the reason he has this structure and has made this progress himself and hes not....crediting it all to bruno obviously but bruno did play a Large Role. and bruno is all about little white lies, appearances. Yes hes fine. Dont worry, he has things under control. 

and i think to an extent abbacchio knows of brunos softer spots (as does fugo, bc of the reason he and fugo team up as described in phf is to protect him) but abba doesnt realise to the extent that bruno is .... hiding his real fears. brunos a lot about compartmentalization (hi zippers) and being let into brunos internal... thoughts beyond the occasional worries he mightve shared is a big step for them. bruno buries a lot of his internal problems and worries. he has to. hes got to keep moving, keep working; people rely on him... but abbacchio is the person he doesnt feel like he needs to protect because theyre equals and maybe he can let someone in to shoulder his worries and vice versa. theyre partners.

which is why i think abbacchio initially distrusts giorno so much... its not tht he doesnt trust bruno, but bruno doesnt Tell him about this. he realizes he might not know all brunos fears (specifically @ his distate and hate towards the mafia i made the point about in the bruno isnt evil post where its like.. he Couldntve shared that information, otherwise he would endanger abbacchio)

and it scares him. it freaks him the fuck out because he doesnt understand who this kid is or why bruno trusts him so much but he trusts bruno so he goes with it, even if he doesnt Understand.

anyways thts my TEDtalk ty i love you for reading this if you got here<3

#EDIT: ok 2 rb if you want!!! #leone abbacchio #im not tagging it otherwise i just want this findable in my own tagging system LOL #all of this is from discord from dming adrian and simon so hi guys if youre reading the tags #i deal with a lot of the issues abbacchio does but i understand that that doesnt mean i didnt use language that might be incorrect #i understand and apologize !! feel free to send an ask but otherwise pls im not trying to start meta discourse over an anime character #i just wanted to get my thoughts out because im tired of seeing representations of him that i just. feel are SO so ugly #esp as someone whos struggled with the issues #caleb.txt #caleb meta hour

[everythingsinred]

ask game for gakuen alice! 1, 6, and 25

OOOh im so excited to be asked about ga <3

1. What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?

i guess i'm not really a multi-shipper so i only ship natsume and mikan with each other. ive never really been able to ship mikan with anybody else even tho a few times i have tried to open myself to the idea of multishipping (pretty much in any fandom tbh)... it just never clicked with me. so i dont really ship hotaru or ruka with mikan at all. its not necessarily that i dont get it as much as its just not really my thing ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

i dont really think so? for ga specifically, the stuff i hate i wouldnt ever like no matter how much fandom i saw of it (like. despite the fact that ive seen the existence of way too many persona x mikan and even persona x natsume fanfics on ffn theres no way id ever be able to stop hating stuff like that lmao). there's ships i was okay with but started to really love because of fandom though, like hotaruka!

25. How would you end XXX/Would you change the ending of XXX?

DONT GET ME STARTED MLMFBSHDUFID

i generally dislike the entire final arc (ill get to that in my essays if anyone is interested) bc the main four have unresolved character arcs. like. all four of them. have unfinished character arcs. ALL OF THEM. and stuff that was set up from the very start was abandoned?? for some reason?? it all feels really pointless, but its hard to see just how unsatisfying it is bc youre crying the whole time. like i didnt get that i disliked the whole final arc for a while bc it was so emotional. it was easy to dislike the last couple chapters bc it was so rushed but the whole last arc was a bit of a let down as well, and when i looked at it without the emotion attached, i realized just how incomplete the story is. in general i think ga has some masterful storytelling, so having it end in such a lackluster way, when so many things were brilliantly set up, is pretty disappointing.

so yeah i WOULD change it. not to get too into details, but mikan shouldve been able to save natsume with her nullification alice. if she still lost all her alice with that then even better (i wouldnt necessarily change that). her losing her memories is something that couldve been used more narratively bc it wasnt used to its full potential. hotaru shouldve promised to find mikan again, the exact reverse of how the story started, with hotaru running after mikan instead of the other way around. ruka shouldve been involved in saving natsume somehow, bc his arc abt being a burden to his best friend is left hanging wide open otherwise.

oof but me saying "should" is very bold... these are just ideas that i feel would suit the rest of the story and complete the character arcs. if the arcs were completed in other ways that would be nice too, but having them completed is important to me.

thank u so much for asking me all this... sorry my last answer is so long!

if you wanna send me a salty ask, feel free!

#ga #gakuen alice #thank u for taking the time to send me this #i always get so excited abt ask games! #answered #anonymous #ask games #salty asks

[yyxgin]

meteor garden is so problematic honestly my favourite part was when there was a meteor shower for 10 whole seconds somewhere mid 20’s episode. i forgot to mention she HAS a job she just like never went (on camera at least) she goes to uni that’s why she’s so broke too. it’s typical rich family pays off poor girl to leave her son alone but son is the one chasing the girl 🤡

HAJSJSKSKAKKA i got so much stuff from that album i didn’t realise how much i really got until i got a different album and i was like,, okay. i got a chan pc, double sided han pc, minho pc, changbin polaroid pc, changbin & minho film strip and a kind of pop out thing? of i.n. there’s an ot7 thing too but i figured everyone got that.

i recently watched... uh... into the dark? and it was in french and i didn’t even realise i wasn’t reading the subtitles i was like ~woah~

if you don’t mind me asking ~ what’s your part time job? only bc we can make conversation about it!! also i freaked out at my last job bc i thought i’d put down my details wrong as a lady at hq rang me to tell me they were having problems paying me 😰 i think the computer might’ve read my numbers wrong bc i write in cursive but like... i write more... how do i say... comic sans? for formal docs bc the computer can read my handwriting and people can read it too T-T we used to get told for exams to write really neatly bc if the examiners can’t read it they don’t mark it and we work solely off of essay writing here (or short answers no multiple choice bs) so i worried that i’d get stuck w the one examiner who couldn’t read my writing but the boy who’s handwriting looks like a spider ran across his book gets someone who can read it perfectly fine 😓 my ultimate fear tbh. i love the extra flourish i can add to envelopes just by writing all fancy-like.

YES YOLO!! i’m a libra so i’m the worst at decision making so when i do it’s impulsive and i have to say things like yolo to justify myself and then i’m gucci for the day.

yuta makes me so 😳🥵🤪😚😳😍🥵🤪 for every reason. i have a weakness for japanese men... my mind just goes into overdrive and i short circuit,, i’m afraid of watching shotaro content bc he’s just so 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 and do i dare risk it?

personally, i enjoy russian roulette by rv but that’s very, pop-y of them. i like b sides by them more bc they carry a different sound to them. ice cream cake is good. and future!!! i like future bc i watched start-up tho 🤩 ladies night is a fun one and if i remember correctly time slip was good? i have a massive playlist with loads of artists so i need a refresher on rv as got7 and simon dominic have been in heavy rotation recently 😬

what did you do today? how did your interview go? (or am i too early?) wait i think i asked about it earlier oops 🙊 lots of love and positivity being sent your way ~ 🌻

and stop apologising about replying to asks late!!! 😐 i deliberately send asks bc you can take your time over them!! i really don’t mind how long you take!!!!!!!!!!!! 😙 ~ 🌻

ITS OFFICIAL I LOVE METEOR GARDEN DJSJSJ

you have like,,,,so much stuff ??? i wanna steal ????? i would literally do anything for that minho pc😔💔 i think the moment i buy my first album im literally gonna freak out from whoever i get 😩✋

i dont mind u asking !! my part time job is like,, working in this one shop called pepco, idk if you guys have it there lol. its like working behind the cash register and also helping with like,,restocking the shelves and stuff. i'm starting in june hhh lets hope i make some friends as well bc that lady said there are a few girls in my age starting at the same time so we can only hope haha. also i totally get you,,my handwriting changes like every year bc i get an identity crisis and change it lmaoo but people always tell me its really messy and sometimes unreadable😔

YOU ARE A LIBRA ?? I AM IN LOVE W YOU my moon is in libra so decision making isnt my best quality either but the aries sun in me just says fuck it 90% of the time so i'm good.

SHOTARO IS THE LOML HE IS SO 🥺🥺🥺🥺 but also his predebut tiktoks,,,,,much thoughts. yes. his instagram is the best thing that's ever happened to me, like yes get it king 😩

oooh i love russian rulette !! 🤩🤩 i am also a fan of ice cream cake but i dont know the other ones you mentioned, i'll have to give them a listen 😎

i didnt reply yesterday because i was out the whole day with my best friend and when i came home i had a glass of wine and got really sleepy💔and today i just cleaned my room and i'm about to water my plants lets hope i dont forget after finishing this reply,,,my interview went good hhh thanks !!! how has your day been ? ❤

sending u love !! <3

#💌ask #🌻 anon