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the-great-british-blorbo-off · 6 months

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Bracket 2: Round 1, Match 1

Propaganda under the cut! Please be aware that some may contain spoilers.

Jonathan Sims:

They are the perfect tragic protagonist, pretty much doomed from the beginning but with a story so gripping you can't help but route for him and feel for him. No spoilers but his gradually developing powers are really cool and his descent is really interesting. Bonus points: he's canonically ace and has dated men and women.

He's asexual. He's biromantic. He's friends with his ex from university who runs a podcast talking about ghosts. He uses skepticism to cope with trauma and the horrors. He was framed for brutal pipe murder by his boss. When it was explained to Melanie, his ex's current girlfriend, she thought he had burnt someone to death with a smoking pipe because it seemed more in character for him. He got stabbed by the manifestation of losing your mind and successfully lied to his coworker about it. Said coworker, Martin, also had a crush on him, and he A) didn't know, and B) hated him, one reason being Martin had accidentally let a dog into the archives. He has severe arachnophobia. Martin doesn't know this for the first couple seasons, and continually tells him why spiders are important for the ecosystem. In season 2, after a woman filled with murderous worms invades the archives and Martin finds the murdered corpse of the Archivist before Jon in the tunnels below the institute, Jon gets incredibly paranoid that one of his assistants killed her. He makes a deal with Basira, a detective, that she'll get him as many of the recorded tapes found by her body to him as she can, and when he explains to Tim that the reason she was looking for him was he's "helping her with the investigation", Tim takes this to mean he and Basira are hooking up. When he first encounters the evil mannequin ringmaster, his first question is why she doesn't sound Russian. His second question is whether she's going to kill him. He was kidnapped by a circus for at least several weeks and forcibly moisturized. He was in a coma for six months after blowing up a wax museum filled with evil clowns, and only woke up because a random end avatar told him to. When he wakes up, he realizes he loves Martin, and finds that Martin has devoted himself to the concept of being lonely to protect the rest of the Archives employees. He was manipulated into starting the apocalypse. He went to America for a while, got kidnapped by a pair of monster hunters, and met a dead goth trapped in a book. He made a deal with a guy who steals people's bones to remove 2 of his ribs so he could use one of them to get a werewolf detective out of the coffin dimension of being buried alive. His solution before this was to cut off his finger and use that as his anchor, but it didn't work because he physically could not cut through his finger (it kept healing). He realized a shape shifter had killed and replaced his coworker, and immediately bought an axe to destroy the table it was bound in, which he didn't realize would set it free. He's the Ceaseless Watcher's special little boy. He's the antichrist. During and just before the apocalypse, he repeatedly eviscerates the horrors and villains with his mind. Martin finds this hot. During the apocalypse, when they come across the end avatar who woke him up from his coma, Martin asks Jon to kill him because he's jealous that he got Jon to wake up and Martin didn't. He's been kidnapped at least three times. He accidentally manifests tape recorders everywhere.

he got an archiving job and accidentally became the antichrist and i love him SO MUCH!!

Tormented by The Horrors, is a big grump with an even bigger heart, an asexual icon, what else can I say fhdjdhdj

Sopping wet beast

Laszlo Cravensworth:

An extremely British wife guy who is also a vampire. So British that he hates Britain (average British trait). He claimed once that he was Jack the Ripper. He is a very talented musician and composer, having written many popular songs (although not with the same lyrics). Has a passion for science and experiments on people for fun. Ultimate blorbo because he's mostly silly but has a fascination with humanity that drives lots of his actions (music, science, the friends he makes, etc.) which is very special to me.

Feel free to add your own in the tags!

#britpoll #poll #tournament #uk #jonathan sims #the magnus archives #laszlo cravensworth #what we do in the shadows #bracket 2

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maris-rose · 9 months

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The Tups!

Menaces to society!!

Another set of Rise!OCs I made with @chartreuse-you-lose

They are bog turtle twins who were mutated in egg, which helped them survive development.

They were part of a zoo breeding program and when they hatched and were obviously mutated Gazellow got called in to take them as he was mutated at a zoo and also had been taking care of T’ellie for several months to a year or so at this point.

This Does make their timeline a Little confusing but we’re Ignoring that

They are bog turtles so they are Very Small and kinda round and they grow rather slowly.

-> They top out at 4ish feet only growing a couple of cm every few years once they hit like 20.

They like to coordinate when they can and definitely have created a TSL*/pidgin dialect that T’ellie can follow and Gazellow Usually understands (like 75-80% of the time)

(* turtle sign language)

They hibernated when they were little but as they get older they just get really sleepy and lethargic when it’s cold out.

They are Jewish! (Because I’m Jewish and it’s important to me lol) but they live in New York and actually have a decent amount of contact with the Muslim and Indian communities.

I think because Gazellow and T’ellie got mutated basically in public they have a community of people “in the know”, thus less cautious about going out and about, and are also better as disguises than the TMNT boyz so they wander around the city as much as they can

Between the two of them they also speak some Russian, mandarin, Hindi, and Farsi with varying degrees of fluency

Florin

He/they/she pronouns (gender on rotation for max chaos and comedy)

A slightly darker green and a more coppery color to his markings

Not very musical but enjoys the kazoo and also percussion 🥁

More introverted than his twin

Has the ‘tism

Will Stare at you ⚫️_⚫️

Collects modern coins

Enjoys mustard but cannot whistle

Is into entomology (bugs)

(In the bad/post apocalyptic timeline they farm insects and fungi to supplement the food stores)

Barbie core 💖

Obsessed with one piece and Naruto (to the annoyance of T’ellie who didn’t watch ether)

Chaotic evil 💗

Likes to Vape and steal (has never actually Bought a vape)

Uses All the gen alpha slang that literally no one but Aureus understands

On tictok and helps run a YouTube channel with both Aureus and T’ellie

Sneaky

Loves a good weighted blanket

Has moth antenna headphones

Love Mud

Enjoyer of Excel

Likes psychic, fairy, and poison types of Pokémon

Aureus

She/they/he (gender on rotation for max chaos and comedy)

Lighter green with markings that are more gold in color

Plays synth

Slightly more outgoing than Florin

Collects ancient coins

Needs glasses

Very into computers

Like coding and hacking

Techno goth 🩵🖤

Obsessed with one piece and Naruto (to the annoyance of T’ellie who didn’t watch ether)

Chaotic evil 💗

Likes to Vape and steal (has never actually Bought a vape)

Also uses too much gen alpha slang

Is on tictok and helps run the shared YouTube channel

Has ADHD

Quiet and sneaky

Also a weighted blanket enjoyer

Has cat ear headphones

Loves excel

Fan of Mud

Likes electric, steal, and ghost type Pokémon

They aren’t allowed to play with weapons for a while but are really good at infiltration and do eventually train with knives, bolas, darts etc.

I’ll post more art of them soon

#i love them #oc: the tups #oc: florin #oc: aureus #lore!#i speak #rottmnt original character #rottmnt oc #character lore #original character #rottmnt

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steamedlem0ns · 3 years

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Adventures in Goth Sitting Chapter 2: Getting to know your goths dark side.

Part one:

Pairing Bucky x Chubby Powered Female Original Character (Morticia)

Word Count: ~1900

Summary: A glimpse of power has Bucky taking things into his own hands, with a little bit of help.

Warnings: NSFW, Explicit sexual content, dubcon (to be safe), fingering, kinda Dark!Bucky, angst, cursing, drinking, fighting, under the influence of power

Two weeks had passed since the Jumping as I liked to refer to it. Things had, unfortunately and predictably, slipped back to normal. Bucky and I were floating on opposite sides of the universe.

He was sent for a mission three days after and Steve made a point to tell me about his lack of nightmares. ‘Hasn’t happened for more than a night in years, Morty.’

It has nothing to do with me. And that was a hill I’d happily die on.

I sat on the communal couch, legs propped up on Loki as we watched another episode of Goosebumps. Nostalgia was like heroin to the God of Mischief and he was loving this show so far. He’d prodded about my outing with the Soldier but after I smashed a purple tendril into the side of his face he shut up. We’d just fallen into another episode when the sudden silence of our room was shattered.

The doors to the elevator hissed open and out stepped three drunk, loud men. Bucky and Steve had unbuttoned their shirts and Sam had simply shed his. A flask hung off of Buckys belt loop and I laughed.

Turning to Loki, I questioned, “Did you give them that?” He smirked and shrugged,

“The good Capitan said they needed a “boys night” and he said liquor would help. I was simply, helping a friend.”

I smacked his arm and laughed. Mischief, always.

“Morticiaaaaaa!” Sang Steve. The bumbling blonde ran over to the couch and draped himself over the back leaning his head to the side to look at me.

“Show em your pets.” He said. My eyes went wide. Pets. No. He didn’t tell them.

“Yeah, show us your pets, living dead girl.” Sam joined. He hiccuped and gripped onto Buckys side for balance.

“No. Steve, they aren’t pets. They’re a part of me and they’re dangerous. I’m not whipping them out to entertain a bunch of sloshed old men.”

He pouted. Steve Rogers stuck his plump, pink bottom lip out and pouted like a child.

“Please? Well stay back. I told them how cool it looks. Like scary fireworks.”

I relented after several moments of staring at him all big eyes and sweet cheeks.

Loki grabbed my arm as I stood and shot me a look, making sure I was okay with this. I brushed him off gently and he begrudgingly let me go.

“Everyone has to step back and stay back. Steve was wrong,” I walked to the edge of the room near the windows, “they aren’t pets. They’re me.” I glanced at Loki, “Keep them back, please.” He nodded and went to stand, gathering Steve and pulling the other two back toward the other side of the space.

It was like riding a bike, truthfully. Calling my tendrils was just muscle memory, but their impact and power consumption was nothing to joke about. It comes from my chest, deep from within. A cold fire that burns through my very soul, then they come out to play. Long whisps of neon purple dance from my fingertips as they seek to feed.

“They aren’t pets. They feed on impurity, deviousness, and evil. They feed my power without taking a soul. But, arguably their impact is worse.” I let them sing and crawl through the air for a moment, not paying attention to the awestruck group watching. And then I killed them, closed my hands and shut it off. My body crumbled. I fell hard to the marble floor and heaved in as much air as I could. Bringing them out without feeding was too much.

Before I could think again I felt hands wrap around my jaw, tenderly. I looked up to see Loki and Bucky crouched by me, obvious concern etched onto their features.

“I’m okay. It’s just a lot.” I assured them. Bucky braced me against him as he helped me up. They both steadied me as I ambled to the couch.

“Are sure you’re okay, sweets?” Loki asked. He bent, pressing a kiss to my forehead and smoothing my hair. I nodded with a half smile.

“I am. Let me explain, though.” I readjusted on the cushions and pulled a pillow into my lap. Steve and Sam joined us, everyone taking a seat. Loki staying on the floor nearest to me, Bucky on the couch beside me as well.

“I call them tendrils or chicken tenders. They help me when I need it most. They protect me and my abilities and allow me to coax what I need from who I need it. I don’t use them often as they leave the person, empty of all joy and hope. All goodness. I suck out and power their darkest depths at the same time. The tendrils turn them into living buffets of dark energy. Conscience be damned.”

“Do they take a lot out of you?” Sam asked.

“Only if I don’t feed them when they’re pulled out. Like, just now.”

I could see regret and embarrassment cross Steve’s face and he immediately stuttered an apology.

I shook my head, “Its okay. I won’t do it again but at least now if I have to use them in the field you know what they are. I don’t wanna see any of you get hurt because of me.”

I woke the next morning later than usual, having sent a notification to Natasha i would miss our morning session. It was mid afternoon before I emerged from my cave. Dressed in black skinny jeans and a Blackcraft crop top, paired with my black and white converse, I felt confident and cute. I always took the extra time for self care after energy drains, otherwise I’d be a complete bitch. The sun was bright through the windows in the common area, Sam sat at the bar talking to his sister on FaceTime. Scott and Natasha were battling it out on Mario Kart for the last piece of coffee cake and Bucky, Bucky snuck up on me.

He grabbed my hips from behind and yelled my name and I screamed, loud. A burst of purple flared out of my body and I made myself as small as possible. The room clattered to a halt. Natasha booked it to me and pushed Bucky away.

Bucky was just as startled. His chest heaved as the purple mist seeped into his skin. He cold feel cold begin to work it’s way up his spine and he shivered.

“Nat, get Bucky out of here.” I growled. She nodded and began to push the solider from the room. He relented, planting his feet with a horrifying grin.

“I want her.” He snarled. Buckys eyes bore straight through me. The normal glassy seas were tormented by black and purple pulses as the poison sunk into him fully and worked its way through his body.

Natasha shook her head, “Not a chance, big boy. Time to go to your room.” She shoved at him again and Bucky chuckled. He grabbed her wrist and twisted her arm, Natasha grunted.

He muttered to her in Russian and threw her down. Bucky began to stride towards me. My heart raced in my chest as I scrambled backwards. This stride was so much like the one I saw that day when we jumped. My pussy clinched at the thought. He snatched a fistful of my hair and drug me up, pain shot through my skull as I struggled, “Walk.” Bucky shoved me forward and I moved. I wasn’t fighting him. Something in me was screaming at me not to. He marched me to his room, ignoring the screaming of Natasha for Steve to “come get his guard dog before he’s out down.”

His bedroom doors opened much too slowly and he shoved me inside. My palms were sweaty with anticipation and I felt the ache between my legs only grow.

“What. Did. You. Do. To. Me?” Bucky rasped.

“You really scared me. It was an accident. I swear. I would nev…”

“I said, what did you do to me? I won’t ask a third time, doll.”

“It’s like my tendrils but it’s way toned down. It’s like a sparkler compared to a full firework. It uh…enhances darker ambitions and lowers inhibitions.”

Buckys fists clenched tightly at his sides and he huffed.

“Are you okay, Bucky?” I asked timidly. I took a step towards him only for him to step back abruptly.

“Do you wanna know why I stay the fuck away from you?” He asked, not looking up, “it’s because if I don’t, I’m going to fuck that soft body through my mattress and yours. I’m going to ruin you and break you and fucking demolish every single piece of you. And then, I’m gonna stitch you back together and do it again. Forever. Like, my own little toy.”

Holy shit. My breath stopped. Bucky turned to me and tilted his head,

“Oh, doll…you want that don’t you?” He mocked me. Bucky stepped closer and snatched me, flipping me around crushing my back to his body. His metal fingertips bruised at my sides as he ground me into his crotch. His flesh hand wrapped around my throat and tightened. I felt his hard cock beneath his jeans and moaned.

Fuck. I was gonna cave. So hard.

He smirked against my neck and tightened his grip on my hip.

“My little, dirty girl. You want this. You’ve wanted this. Haven’t you?”

I nodded as best as I could beneath his hand.

“Ya know, we didn’t have girls like you back in the day. Not often. And I find, that all you cute, big tittied goth girls -learned that phrase recently - have these lovely Daddy issues. That’s my favorite. I like the little clothes, the black lips, the attitude. But, most of all, I love how fucking wrecked you look when someone finally puts you in your place.”

His metal hand creeped to my jeans button and popped it open, sliding down my zipper. Buckys fingers dug beneath my panties and he cupped my pussy. He growled, squeezing just a bit.

“And chubby girls, god, your pussies are so soft and always so wet. Fuck. I’m mad at myself for shooting down a couple of dames when I was in the army now. If I had known about this,” his fingers slid through my obscene wetness, “I would have said yes. Plus, you’re the best cuddling partners.”

I could be mad at him for half fetishizing my body type and telling me he had a “no fat chicks” rule previously, but people grow. And with his fingers circling my clit edging me closer to orgasm, I could certainly say he was growing on me. Bucky drug his fingers from between my trembling thighs and stuffed them in my mouth roughly. He loosened his grip off my neck and groaned. I felt his cock twitch against my ass.

“God, such a good girl.” He praised.

“Time to be a bad girl though, you think you can do that?”

Bucky asked, kissing my neck and sucking a mark onto the skin.

“Yes, Sir.” I replied, with a dazed smile.

#bucky x morticia #bucky barnes x chubby original female character #bucky barnes fic #bucky Barnes #bucky x original female character #marvel fic #marvel #bucky fic #bucky smut #aigs

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denis-the-ghost · 4 years

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Ranpo as LawLight´s love child

(Please, don´t take this too serious, it´s only for fun (and boredom). Think about this like a kind of Au, probably a notKira!Au)

Why them?

Well, in one of the BSD´s light novels, it was stipulated that Ranpo´s parents were geniuses, both of them. His father worked solving cases with the police, and his mother was capable of beating her husband in his work. They died when Ranpo was little.

A couple of genius detectives, both of them death. Mmm, let me think for a moment. Yeah, this sounded a lot like: LAWLIGHT.

Now in the next paragraphs I will explain some points of my theory.

1) Hair

Color theory 101. Black + Light Brown = could give you: Dark Brown.

Also L´s messy hair + Light´s PERFECT® hair = Ranpo´s hair, with kind of messy bangs well defined.

2) Food liking

L and Ranpo share their liking for sweets.

But this point doesn´t end here, because we know that Ranpo enjoys eating another kind of food like snacks (Movie) and pizza (S02EP12). Probably he likes potato chips with a little sweet flavor, and remember, what kind of chips Light prefers? Yes, BBQ potato chips. A lot of BBQ potato chips have a light sweet flavor. Whit this I´m not saying that Light has a fascination/obsession with potato chips (this is more like a headcanon from the fandom).

3) Sitting

L´s famous way of sitting is a classic. Ranpo doesn´t sit like L, but he is one of the members of the ADA that sits in “so comfortable” ways, not the more ethical for work.

4) Personality

From L, Ranpo got the non-filter to say what he is thinking, more with people that “annoys” them with their lack of intelligence. But of course they don´t say those things in a mean/cruel/pure evil way, both L and Ranpo have other perception of the society functions, for example Light thinks very high of his intelligence, he insults others but in his mind, because he knows more about social constructions and the "importance" of how the others see you.

Now, talking about Light´s ego, Ranpo has his own. Remember, how in the first episodes Light thought about him like the chosen one and the “God of the new world”. Ranpo is always pointing how he´s the best detective and that his ability is the best of the best. As well, both of them have a lot of people always feeding their egos, like Light´s parents or Ranpo´s co-workers.

5) Deduction Support

The reason for L sitting in his particular way is because “Sitting like this increase my deduction abilities in a 40%”. Ranpo “needs” his glasses to activate his “Ultra-deduction”.

In both cases, these two have conditioned their deduction abilities to a thing or a particular action.

6) Height and Eyes

Let´s be honest and let´s be realistic (kind of), not all the children look like a copy-paste of their parents, this is something that fics have taught us and is not 100% correct, genetic doesn’t work this way. Some kids can look more like their grandparents or uncles.

First, let´s talk about the height. Both L and Light are 1.79cm tall *, Ranpo´s height is 168cm. The difference is 11 cm. For his age, Ranpo (26) is a lot shorter in comparison with L and Light (19-25). Light´s father is taller than his son (1.81 cm), and we don´t know L´s parents, neither L´s or Light´s grandparents. And for the height topic, I will choose Light´s mother's family ´cause Sachiko has the average Japanese female´s height, and probably her family too. With that Ranpo´s height fits better in the family tree.

*In the official character sheet L´s height is marked as an estimation.

Second, the eyes. As in the height explanation, Ranpo could have inherited his green eyes from his grandparents or from another family member/ancestor. In this case I will incline my theory with L`s family. Tsugumi Ohba has said "I think of him (L) as a quarter Japanese, a quarter English, a quarter Russian, a quarter French or Italian, like that”, with this information, we could say that L has a high percentage of European/Caucasian heritage, green eyes included.

7) Bonus: The history repeats itself

The cherry on the top in this theory is that like Light, Ranpo got himself a goth/emo-look alike-boyfriend. And as Light and L, Ranpo and Poe share similar interest. Because, don´t forget that Poe is a detective (and writer) too.

Thanks for reading, sorry about my english : )

#lawlight #l x light #Edogawa Ranpo #ranpoe #sorry not sorry #that was fun #love child

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sovamurka · 5 years

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Things from Maleficent: Mistress Of Evil that got my attention and stole my heart:

SPOILERS!

•Dark Fae...SO MANY, SO BEAUTIFUL, SO INCREDIBLY SPECTACULAR! SO RAINBOW!

We should all make Dark Fae Sonas

•Chiwetel Ejiofor being the voice of reason in this mess (Press F to pay respect)

We were basically screaming "Conall, PLEASE, you need to fix this shit, tell her, PLEASE"

•Borra being too hot, too reckless and too dumb

•Miyavi's character being THE DAD, protecting every child he meets, fae or human

•Aurora being the bossy Queen of the Moors!!! THE. CUTEST. QUEEN. EVER.

•Prince Phillip being shy and awkward while proposing to the love of his life.

•Diaval proving that raven is the smartest bird on Earth by doing parkour when guards do not let him in

•Also him standing on his hind paws in his bear form just so he could look at Mal with googly eyes (YES IT DID HAPPEN JUST LOOK AT HIM IN THIS MOMENT!)

•King John being the best. My friend and I agreed that if there was no Diaval King John would be our favourite character. We still have nothing but respect for him. Witty, kind-hearted, supportive... WE ALL NEED SUCH PERSON IN OUR LIFE, SHUTUPITISTRUE!

•Queen Ingrith being THE BITCH.

•Diaval running to his daughter and wife Aurora and Mal.

•"I missed you"

*shocked* "Did you hurt your head?

*(:D)* "Yeah, badly"

Russian dub, also, I need you to know that the audience was dying from laughter during this conversation

•That shot of pastel couple and goth couple standing side by side at the end of the battle

C'MON y'know who am I talking about

#maleficent #maleficent mistress of evil #maleval #prince Phillip #Aurora #dark fae #diaval

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listen-to-miracles-again · 4 years

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For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists. I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun. I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed. I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat. I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy. I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS. I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape. I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist. I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch. I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell. I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell. I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat. I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world. I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people. I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible. I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay. I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash. I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants. I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem. I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store. I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage. I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore... I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe. I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut. I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs. I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob. I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo. I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend. I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars. I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy. I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore. I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut. I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one". I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST! I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin. I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life. I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention. I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention. I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual. I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player. I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer. I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser. I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll. I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi. I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT. I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13 I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent. I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy. I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid. I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat. I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly. I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7 I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals. I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up. I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist. I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork. I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty. I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser. I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self-control. I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister. I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore. I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive. I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border. I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat. I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot. I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis. I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay. I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich. I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino. I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party. I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo. I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy. I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone. I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too. I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't. I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social. I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy. I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch. My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills. I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch. I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs. I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser. I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE… So I MUST be a whore myself. I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual. I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak. I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker. I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted. I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled. I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak. I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant. I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo. I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent. I’m QUIET if I don’t know you so I MUST be emo or anti-social. I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend. I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers. I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare. I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth. I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE. I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid. I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE. I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER! I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth. I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future. I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue. I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex. I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian. I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see. I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE. I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER. I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED. I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST. I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST. I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick. I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY. I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE. I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard. I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean. I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid. I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the time I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian. I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting. I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak. I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life. I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too. I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp. I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around. I CURSE A LOT so I MUST be a bad kid and have problems I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems PLEASE READ WHAT'S UNDER THIS!! I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian. I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman. I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights. We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time. I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room. I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me. I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again. I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear. We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men. I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me. I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male. I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men. I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that. I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual. I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me. I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind. I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parentshe loves another male. Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it Sorry for the long post. I just think this is important. I got this from Ivory’Lee Lambskank on m.fanfiction.net

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