#i may be smart but 99% of my impulse control comes from other people

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#i may be smart but 99% of my impulse control comes from other people #gif #animatedtext #wordart #transparent

[noddytheornithopod]

Okay, now that I’ve gotten all the Bad Batch controversies out of the way... I can finally talk about the actual damn episode properly.

Like I said on my whitewashing post, overall I liked it, but I am kinda hesitant for reasons I explained there. I now want to focus on the actual story itself on its terms, and see how I feel about that. Apologies if I jump all over the place.

Probably my biggest issue narrative wise was that I felt some of the stuff around Crosshair was a bit contrived. Like, I was fine with him going full GOOD SOLDIERS FOLLOW ORDERS and all that, my issue is that I feel like the others took a while to realise he was following Order 66. Like, Tech even says he can’t be certain their mutations entirely screwed up their programming, with the camera even cutting to Crosshair. And like, before that Crosshair is berating Hunter for letting Caleb escape. When Tech said what he did, I feel like Hunter should’ve probably said something like “that must be why Crosshair tried to kill the Jedi”. Granted, it probably would’ve then led to questions like why Crosshair’s genetics let his chip work and not the others (something that isn’t answered, but it’s not something I felt that needed to, different genetics affect things in different ways we can’t always predict), but like, when they’re on Onderon and Crosshair’s like “yeah let’s shoot literal child refugees”, I feel like they shouldn’t have just conflicted with him, they should’ve outright wondered if he was falling for his programming. It doesn’t break the episode for me and I guess they probably just assumed Crosshair was being his usual dickish self, but I guess that also is a reminder that this is the second time we’ve seen him, so we don’t know if he’d normally be up for killing innocents if a mission requires it (since TBB are still given missions, their thing is they just do them the wrong way). It’s just like, you’d think at least Tech would make some comment about it. As Saw said, he’s supposed to be the smart one lol.

On the topic of inhibitor chips, I was surprised that Crosshair’s was only partly working. I guess it’s because he still had a level of personality to him? The more you know, I guess.

I do think the Bad Batch work better here as many have said, I guess probably because they’re the focus of the story so they have more room to show who they are and nuances to that. My favourite is probably Tech, I tend to gravitate to the nerd characters in things. Shame he has to look so fucking white for being a clone of a brown man though. :/ Kinda like Wrecker too, even with the issues HE has too. Great, even in my main comments my issues with them are popping up. :v

On that note... I do appreciate the idea behind the Bad Batch, being clones who turned out different and it’s about accepting and embracing your differences. It’s just in execution, it’s a bit of a mixed bag. Like, it could be a commentary on things like ableism, but thing is, these characters are basically superpowered (if people weren’t fixated on bashing women they don’t like and were equal in their vitriol, you could EASILY call the Bad Batch a bunch of Gary Stus). It’s one of those things where a sci-fi/fantasy allegory is well intentioned but because of things that don’t apply to our reality, the allegory kinda falls apart. Like yes, “be nice to people different to you” is one thing, but it does lowkey feel a bit like “they’re judged because they’re better than everyone else, those stinkin regs are just jealous”. Well no jealousy is shown in the episode, in fact a normal clone calls them defects... which is weird because even if yes TECHNICALLY they are, they’re basically presented as turning out different, but those differences are things that are beneficial to them, and not impairments. I guess I feel like the message would be stronger if they actually had major weaknesses, aka why they’re “defective”, but their strengths are something they excel at so much they’re allowed to serve (which I GUESS was the idea, but we don’t know what made them defective originally and what got their mutations enhanced). And yes, you can infer things like Wrecker being “dumb” (which has its own issues, and even then he’s still competent enough on a battlefield, honestly he might even be more just impatient and impulsive and thus can’t sit still to learn more complex things), but yeah. It’s kind of a mixed message here, I appreciate what they’re going for, but like many fictional allegories, it kinda falls apart and it’s also presented in a very individualistic way.

Okay let me say something positive: AZI-3 IS BACK! I assume he got memory wiped so he wouldn’t have any memory of Fives, but I really liked him in the Order 66 arc of The Clone Wars so I was happy to see him again. Well, until he was hit with that stun blast. I hope he’s okay and able to be repaired!

Echo’s attack with his probe arm thing is pretty cool. It was also cool seeing how he was integrating into the Bad Batch. I also theorised he was most likely to be immune to the inhibitor chip out of the group, because while I felt the Kaminoans wouldn’t overlook inhibitor chips in even mutated clones (they do explain that they kept them around because they were always successful at what they do despite their unorthodox tactics), I had a feeling that the Techno Union putting all those cybernetics in his head maybe screwed with or even removed the chips. Get the poor guy some skin colour though.

I have also seen some people bring up the potential issue of ableism with Echo given he’s an amputee with prosthetics, but I don’t have much to comment on in that regard. But yeah, using disabled bodies for shock value and it being seen as a measure of humanity like in The Bad Batch arc of TCW is a trope I could really do without.

I’m liking Omega so far. She’s definitely got a different vibe to other kid characters we’ve gotten in these shows, probably because she was raised on Kamino. Also appreciate that her voice actor is New Zealander too (she’s not Maori which would’ve been the ideal, but was born to Indonesian Chinese parents). Her curiosity makes a lot of sense, she’s not just mischievous because kid. Was nice to see Hunter open up to her too.

I’m intrigued to see where they take Crosshair. IDK why his genetics allowed his chip to still work, but it’s nice to see at least one of the Bad Batch follow Order 66. I guess they decided against it for more (as much as I’d liked to have seen it) because Order 66 doesn’t just make clones decide to kill Jedi, it basically removes any level of humanity and personality they may have developed and makes them basically stormtroopers. That, and well they want our heroes of the show to be the Bad Batch, and that can’t work if they’re now the goody two shoes batch.

On the topic of Crosshair, my favourite scene in the episode was actually when Omega talks to him. She tries to empathise with him, and whether she’s just naturally intuitive or is Force sensitive in some way, she can tell that Crosshair despite everything seems to be struggling, and it’s ultimately beyond his control that he’s like this now. And then he’s off to get his chip working at full capacity and is now a full on Imperial, RIP.

Also yeah, I’m on team “Omega is Force sensitive”. It’s possible she just has some heightened abilities because she’s an enhanced clone, but the way they framed her firing the blaster especially just screamed Force sensitivity to me.

On the topic of inhibitor chips, Crosshair proves that it’s possible to make them stronger, so it does potentially mean that if members of the Bad Batch are captured, their chips could be dialed up to make them loyal Imperials. I guess one could also wonder if they could be slow for the effects to come into play for some of them, so some maybe slowly turn later on? I doubt they will go that route because they probably want to keep all our heroes around, but it’s something, especially if they eventually conclude they have to remove their chips to be safe.

Seeing Saw in the first episode was surprising but also pretty cool, especially with how the model is transitioning from his Clone Wars appearance into Forrest Whittaker. Love how he sees right through Palpatine’s bullshit, especially when he makes that jab at Tech that seems to be a bit of a blow to his ego, lol. Some have wondered why he’s so chill here, but you have to remember this is early days Saw. He’s still cautious, but he’s not paranoid and overly violent. The way some of those refugees reacted to the clones does make it seem like there’s already Imperial forces occupying Onderon (well, they’re literally out in the forest at a camp). Mainly bring that up because I have to wonder how much time has passed, and how quickly Imperial forces showed up to Onderon.

Seeing Tarkin be a dick is always glorious. He just goes everywhere and KNOWS he’s in charge, lol. It was also interesting how even if he’s feeling like he’s ready to abandon clone forces, he sees potential with Clone Force 99 if they can follow Imperial doctrine.

The Kaminoans also seem distrustful of the Empire, not because they’re against it but because they want to keep their current deal. Maybe if Tarkin heard them out the Empire would have a better army, lol. Taun We from AOTC even cameoes. I do wonder what’s eventually going to happen though, given the clones are obviously abandoned in the end, I wonder how the Kaminoans are going to take it.

Also, Nala Se is back. Yeah, THAT Nala Se. Wonder what she’s doing with Omega as her medical assistant, lol. Oh yeah, she also stopped the doors and let the Bad Batch escape. I have no idea what she’s planning, but I feel like she’s being shady, given not only the Fives stuff but also because despite having a fondness for Omega she does seem like she’s very controlling of her (after all, she’s just property to her), hence why Omega wants to get out and be with the Bad Batch.

Okay, I think that’s everything I wanted to say? But yeah, have a lot of reservations, but still curious to see where this goes despite that.

#tbb spoilers #sw spoilers #the bad batch #star wars

[contextualizd]

You love me… Why the hell do you love me?

Since my favorite show (Brooklyn 99) has started shooting their 8th season recently, I decided to write another fan fiction about it. Also because I love the song Best Part Of Me by Ed Sheeran so much, and it really inspired me to write a story that relates to it. Hope you guys like it!

NOTE: Originally posted here.

Also on AO3.

Plot: The story behind “Every time we get emotional, he says ‘Noice. Smort.’” and the reason why Jake was not able to say I love you to Amy first.

Set after “The Cruise”

Title from the song Best Part Of Me by Ed Sheeran feat. YEBBA

But she loves me, she loves me

Why the hell she love me

When she could have anyone else?

Oh, you love me, you love me

Why the hell do you love me?

'Cause I don't even love myself

Jake opened the door to their suite and started kissing Amy again as soon as they were inside. They just came back from the dancing class and they couldn’t seem to let go of each other. They kissed with so much passion but also with such tenderness. Like they want to pour out the intensity of their emotions that they’ve both been holding in for so long.

“I love you, Jake,” Amy tells him when they broke the kiss to catch their breaths.

“I love you too, Ames,” Jake tells her, feeling relieved to finally be able to say it out loud.

Amy touched his face and brushed her thumb on his skin. And Jake can’t help but smile and lean into the tenderness of her touch. He still can’t believe that this amazing woman actually loves him. She’s too good and too perfect. He’s such a mess and to him, it’s surreal that someone like her could actually love him back. It just doesn’t make sense.

In hindsight, he probably already knew that he loved her even before they said it to each other. He might have loved her long before he even dared to admit it to himself.

Maybe it was too soon to tell, but he’s probably been in love with her since that day she went to his apartment to tell him that they should just “Screw light and breezy”.

He’s probably already in love with her when he decided that he’ll be willing to be demoted if it meant he could still be with her.

But what really made his feelings stronger, were the many times Amy made him feel special.

He’s always been insecure about himself even though he’ll never let it show. Growing up with a cheating father who eventually left, probably did that to him. He became cautious with his relationships. Too afraid to take things seriously. Always trying to hide his emotions behind his jokes and laid back attitude.

He always felt like he couldn’t possibly be a good match for Amy. She’s so put together while he’s just all over the place. But she never made him feel like that mattered. She cared for him like no one did before.

When the Vulture threatened to demote him if he continued to date Amy, she was willing to stay away from him even if it would hurt her. She didn’t want him to compromise his dreams just for her.

She understood him, even if they were so different. Their interests were contrasting, but he saw how Amy tried to acquaint herself in his world.

Watching Die Hard with him till the very end of the movie, even if she’s clearly not into it.

Trying to cheer him up by giving him a sticker just for waking up during that time he was suspended by the Vulture for working a case behind his back.

Buying Orangina for him because she thought it was orange soda and she wanted to buy him his favorite drink cause he clearly loves them.

Enduring his lumpy mattress for a while even when she can’t get any sleep just so she could spend the night with him in his apartment.

Checking up on him from time to time cause she felt guilty when she wasn’t able to come to him faster during that time he had a “Die Hard situation” at the mall with Gina and Charles.

Taking care of him during that time he got quarantined with Holt when they both got the mumps.

Trying to cook for him so he would stop eating cold pizza when they both know that she couldn’t cook anything even if her life depended on it.

And even in this cruise, which he has so clearly messed up right from the very beginning by working too hard on following Doug Judy’s every move instead of enjoying it with her. She wanted to have fun with him and do all the stuff in their itinerary, and any girl would have been pissed with a boyfriend who continues working while they’re on vacation. Sure, they’re cops and the criminal is right in front of them but he has to admit that he may have gone overboard with the Pontiac Bandit thing.

But Amy understood. She even helped him all throughout. Not complaining even if it wasn’t how she expected the cruise would turn out at all. And he appreciates that so much.

She did so many things for him that no one has ever done before. And with every little thing that she does, he falls in love a little bit more.

But he didn’t tell her. Cause he was afraid it might scare her off. They’ve only been together for a few months, and he’s not sure how she would feel if he suddenly confesses that he’s already in love with her.

He was afraid that she doesn’t feel the same way about him yet. They may be together but he doesn’t really think that someone like Amy Santiago would love Jake Peralta.

What if she’s just doing all this because she wants to be an amazing girlfriend. And not exactly for the reason that she loves him back. She’s quite competitive so it could be possible. Plus he thinks that there’s no way Amy would ever love him back. He’s totally flawed. And he knows Amy could easily find someone who’s so much better.

Telling her he loves her could send her running to the door. Just like everyone else in his life. Every time he gets too emotionally invested… they leave. It happened with his dad. It happened with Sophia. And he’s not sure if he can take it if it ever happens between him and Amy.

So instead of telling her how he actually feels, he did what he does best. Hide behind his stupid jokes. Every time he starts to feel his emotions towards Amy get to him, he tries to hide it with a “Noice. Smort.” Which usually ruins whatever emotional moment they have. But he figured that’s probably fine. That’s how they’ve always been. Teasing each other. Making fun of each other. It’s better off that way. Better than being too clingy too soon and assuming that she would actually fall in love with him.

But she did. She loves him. She said so herself.

At first, he thought maybe he’s dreaming.

Did she really say that? Is this real? Am I still alive?!

He was too nervous that he stupidly responded with a “Noice. Smort.” yet again. Then, he realized, screw this! He has to let her know how he feels. So when he said “I love you too”, and he saw the happiness that immediately showed on her face, he just felt so full of joy. Her beautiful smile and her eyes that shone with pure glee is the best thing he’s ever seen. And his only regret is that he never said it first cause he kept holding back.

“I still can’t believe it.”

“What?”

“That you love me.”

“Why?”

“I mean, I’m… me. And you’re… you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Just… look at you. You’re amazing. You’re beautiful and smart and so organized and put together. And I’m just… a complete wreck.

I mean, I think I’m beautiful too but that’s probably where the similarity ends.

I’m just kidding about that last part. Or not... It’s up to you really. If you’d agree. I’m gonna shut up now.”

Amy just smiled fondly at him.

“Okay first of all Jake, yes I think you are beautiful. I’m pretty sure I’ve told you that before. But no, you are not a complete wreck. I think you’re amazing and hella smart too. Maybe not organized, but I don’t care. That’s my thing. You don’t need to jump on it.

I love you because you are a good person. Yes, you’re impulsive and sometimes a bit childish but I love that about you. And even if you pose as someone who only cares about himself and doesn’t want to deal with emotions, I know you’re not really like that. I know you care about the people you love and you will do anything to protect them and make them happy. I mean, just look at all your friends. No matter how annoying you try to be, they still stayed by your side.”

“I mean, they didn’t have much choice. We all work together in one place so…”

“I’m just telling you that I love you, Babe. And I really wish you’d believe me.”

“I do believe you, Ames. You’ve been so good to me. You’re absolutely amazing. I just don’t know if I deserve it. And I couldn’t believe that someone like you would actually love someone like me. It just doesn’t make sense. So you know… I kept holding back. I kept trying to control my emotions because I don’t want to scare you off if I tell you how I feel.”

“But you didn’t scare me off. And it does make sense because I love you. And I don’t want you to think otherwise because I will keep on loving you no matter what.”

She kissed him tenderly trying to show him how she truly feels. And he just let himself get lost into it. Why was he even thinking too much about this? He’s with the most beautiful, most intelligent, and most incredible woman he’s ever known. He should just cherish this and be thankful that she loves him in spite of all his flaws. So he breaks off momentarily and lifts her chin so she would look into his eyes.

“I love you too, Babe.”

And they kissed again, somehow deeper and more passionate, making him feel so many emotions he’s never felt before. But this time, he’s no longer overthinking it. Everything is finally making sense… because he’s so fucking in love with Amy Santiago.

Baby, the best part of me is you

Lately, everything's making sense too

Oh, baby, I'm so in love with you

🌹

#fan fiction #brooklyn 99 #brooklyn 99 fanfic #short story #creative writing #jake and amy #best part of me #ed sheeran #writersf4f #follow for follow back #b99 #b99 fic #b99 fanfic #early peraltiago #b99 edit #peraltiago

[rottenbutrecovering]

Hello, I've been questioning whether or not I have BPD I've had unstable relationships for awhile now due to going from hating someone to loving them or becoming very attached to them like a Favorite person not only that but my emotions and mood tend to switch in one whole day and are intense I avoid people and this thing where I want them to leave me alone but not leave me alone so I isolate a lot. I was wondering what your experience is with BPD so I can get a better understanding of it.

I ofc cannot diagnose you, but what you’ve described are in line with how people experience BPD! 

What I’ll do is go through the diagnostic criteria (I’ll use the DSM-4 as it’s lead out more clearly, but here’s the DSM-5 criteria) and talk about how I experience each symptom. (Note: you need at least 5 of these symptoms)

(1) frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.

For me, this typically involves begging a person to stay, lowering my standards and tolerating some real bullshit from people just so they stay, and being on constant lookout for any possible signs of being abandonment. These signs (which 99% of the time are meaningless but at the time feel very very real) can be as small as a sigh, or one less ! on a message

(2) a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation

This is where splitting comes in. For me, I can see a person (mostly with me they are FPs or my partner) as perfect, flawless. Then they do something, often tiny, and my perception just flips and I just... hate them. It really sucks, because I often can tell I’m being irrational but I just get so filled with hate. And this can be as tiny as someone saying they don’t like a show I like. Luckily, with time and therapy, I’m now able to just take a step back when this happens and tell the person I need some time away from them, so I can avoid treating them badly.

I also very much experience this symptom towards myself - sometimes I adore myself (i’m gorgeous, smart), and sometimes I hate myself (i’m disgusting, worthless).

(3) identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self

Including what I said above, for me I just simply do not know what I’m like as a person. My aesthetic changes constantly, as do my goals. If you asked me how to describe myself, I simply wouldn’t know how. I force myself to do certain things simply because I think that’s what I would do, but honestly I’m not sure.

I typically pick an interest and obsess and invest in it deeply and define myself by it, and these change pretty often too.

(4) impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging

 This is a symptom I personally don’t think I show. My GAD prevents me from doing basically anything impulsive. 

(5) recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior

I get suicidal thoughts, and behave on those, often. It’s tiring. I also have self harmed in the past, but I’m proud to say I haven't for a while! 

(6) affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days)

Mood swings are so TIRING. The smallest thing can swing my mood dramatically, every day, and it is exhausting. I can go from happy, to depressed, to excited, to anxious, to angry - all so easily and quickly. I am extremely sensitive.

(7) chronic feelings of emptiness

It’s hard to describe emptiness any clearer than just calling it feeling empty. It’s just... nothing. A go through periods where I don’t experience emotions and just feel blank. I often show surface level emotions during this time, but I don’t properly feel them.

(8) inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger 

I get angry/pissed off very easily, however it is not as extreme as many other with BPD have. It mostly results in snide comments and passive aggression. I’m bad at expressing my anger as due to my fear of abandonment and past abuse, I’m worried I will be left or punished for it. I typical turn that anger inwards towards myself, directing it towards self-blame and hatred.

The anger I feel is so deep rooted, it’s hard to explain. It takes over my whole body and it’s so, so intense.

(9) transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms

The former part of this - paranoid ideation - is difficult as I have other disorders that make me super paranoid all the time. My paranoia does get worse during stress though.

I dissociate during times of extreme stress. I feel completely disconnected from my body, it takes me a lot longer to process stuff, and I feel numb. It’s hard to see myself in my own body during this.

I hope this helps you Nonnie! Although remember that this is just my personal experience with BPD - yours may be very different! 

#answered #advice #self harm tw #suicide tw #Anonymous

[hairterminator]

http://blog.hair-terminator.com/uncategorized/10-bad-style-tips-dont-listen-to-these-beliefs-on-clothes-fashion/

10 BAD Style Tips | Don’t Listen To These Beliefs On Clothes & Fashion

#http://blog.hair-terminator.com Clothing says nothing about you. Do you believe that? Some do. They mention Mark Zuckerberg, Steve Jobs… …how they’d always dress casually & never be judged for it. But they fail to realize that their clothing still says everything about

#http://blog.hair-terminator.com

Clothing says nothing about you. Do you believe that? Some do. They mention Mark Zuckerberg, Steve Jobs… …how they’d always dress casually & never be judged for it. But they fail to realize that their clothing still says everything about them. It says: I’m an everyday guy I have so many decisions to make and clothing isn’t one of them I’m relatable Their choice to wear a nontraditional uniform still sends a message, whether they want it to or not. But they can also afford to make those choices because they’ve already made a name for themselves. This article is going to cover 10 BAD style tips to always ignore. Click here to watch the video – 10 Bad Style Tips Click here to watch the video on YouTube – The WORST Style Advice On The Web This post was brought to you by Tiege Hanley. My good friend Aaron Marino has helped grow this company — and I love their awesome contributions to men’s health & lifestyle.  With their affordable all-in-one skin care system — any man can fight aging or skin-related problems even BEFORE he’s old & gray. Use promo code: RMRS20 to get your first box for 20% OFF Click Here To Discover Tiege Hanley Skincare Products

BAD Style Tip #1 – Image Isn’t As Important As Substance

People say it’s good to dress up nicely, but don’t think it carries as much weight as your substance (or your character). We’ve heard it many times: don’t judge a book by its cover. But most of us do spend our lives in some sort of competition (with colleagues, fellow job applicants, or other single men at the party). So your “cover” is a crucial thing. It can end up being the reason slightly like you more than your rivals. Your presentation can win them over even before you speak. Zero-Sum Game Mentality The best way to look at men’s style is from a winner-take-all point of view. That’s the core of the zero-sum game mentality – where it’s either you win or you lose. Your competitor wins or loses because of you. Either you amp up your style and reap the rewards, or someone else does it. It was a case of image-over-substance during the very first televised US presidential debate in 1960 – between candidates Richard Nixon and John F. Kennedy. The word ‘televised’ is key here. It’s widely believed that JFK won the election by outdoing Nixon in the debate. Did JFK give better answers? No – but he was better in every other way. He spoke to the public by directly looking at the camera. Nixon focused on answering reporters’ questions. JFK had his charm and movie-star looks which made him fit for TV. Nixon had a five o’clock shadow, a tendency to sweat and turn his head now and then. So although Nixon was the more experienced guy, JFK won by a narrow margin. He didn’t have to explain he could do this or that better. He simply caught ’s attention and moved them. And JFK must’ve known his image would resonate more than his substance. So he used it to win the whole thing.

BAD Style Tip #2 – Clothing Doesn’t Signal Status

Some believe that clothes aren’t indicators of where you stand in your society. They mention Mark Zuckerberg’s habit of wearing gray t-shirts and hoodies all the time. But here’s the thing – Zuckerberg isn’t among the 99% like we are. He’s worked his way to achieving an “outlier” status. He’s earned the right to wear what he wants and not be judged for it (and it certainly helps that he’s in the tech industry). He serves a community large enough to be the 3rd most populated country on Earth! It makes sense for him to focus on decisions for Facebook and block out smaller, everyday decisions like what to wear. Not everyone has that excuse. And Zuckerberg isn’t limited to one location. The rest of us have local environments – with their own guidelines for how to dress. That’s why teachers, news anchors, managers, and bankers all follow a specific dress code. Trust and credibility are on the line. And going back to the 1960 US presidential debate, we can agree that Kennedy had both great style and superb communication skills. He was very charismatic. If you strike a balance between looking sharp and communicating well – you’ll be able to convince others to hire you, promote you, work with you, buy your products, listen to your ideas or even treat you like a rockstar. It’s all about the status you’re perceived with. You’re only exempt from this by having the fame and respect of a guy like Zuckerberg. And if he wasn’t recognized and entered a room in his t-shirt and hoodie, everyone would treat him normally.

BAD Style Tip #3 – Solve Problems As They Come Along (Not Before)

I know – fashion isn’t a life-or-death kind of thing. Most style-related problems you’ll face don’t require a sense of urgency. But I can say it’s better not to experience those problems at all. Is a button loose on your dress shirt? Fix it now before it falls off. Are you starting a new job where it’s crucial to keep your shirt tucked in? Make shirttail garters part of your daily wardrobe. Many small style mistakes aren’t actually caused by what you do, but what you fail to do. The same goes for skin care. Should you have to wait for those first wrinkles or age spots before taking action? No. You can start treating your skin early on – to prevent stuff so there’s no need for any cure.  

BAD Style Tip #4 – You Can Wear Anything And Look OK

Maybe you had this mindset sometime in those rebellious teenage years. But that shouldn’t be the case anymore. This is real life. Here’s an analogy. You know James Bond? He’s a handsome badass, right? Women have adored him in the past, and more of them will in future films. But can you imagine Arnold Schwarzenegger or Vin Diesel do the role of Bond in their normal voices? Don’t they star in action movies? Don’t they fit the mold looks-wise? Nope – because Bond is a British icon. A British accent is 100% a must. Those guys would have to pull that off before their acting can even be judged. Style is like that in a sense. Anyone can wear the same type of clothing just like anyone can pretend to be James Bond. But not everybody can succeed – and send the right message – with that item. A number of factors come into play when you go from “dressing up” to “being stylish.” You must understand your body type, and how your complexion contrasts with different colors.

BAD Style Tip #5 – Let Your Woman Dress You

Does your S.O. control what you watch on TV? Or what music you listen to? Definitely not. So why is it that some think your woman should dress you? Honestly, I’d say those men are (A) the lazy type or (B) in a relationship with somebody who’s OCD about their clothes. (Those in category B, sorry for that. Hope you’re handling that well.) But I’m a big fan of dressing yourself. What if she insists you wear a flashy red blazer to an event – even though you’re not exactly the life of the party? She’ll just do all the talking while you sit beside her, sipping cocktails and throwing in a few one-liners. It makes more sense that she wears red while you come in navy or charcoal gray. Let her be your consultant only. She can make suggestions – but find an endearing way to convey “thanks but no thanks” whenever you disagree. Who knows? You might surprise her with something she never thought you’d look perfect in!

BAD Style Tip #6 – Buy Everything At Once

Clothes may not have expiration dates like food does – but that’s no reason to buy yourself a full set at once. It doesn’t matter if you hate shopping. You’ll regret it. Remember that your body changes over time. You should never expect all your jeans, trousers, dress shirts and jackets to fit you perfectly for 5+ years. It can also be a bummer when you realize in a matter of months – you haven’t used certain items due to the color or fabric. Good money wasted. If you really want to shop smart and deal with less clothing, focus on having an interchangeable wardrobe. This will give you enough variety to adjust your outfits every now and then. It will help you stay stylish and avoid “risky” selections at the same time.

BAD Style Tip #7 – It’s On Sale, So Buy It Now

On paper, buying something on sale is supposed to save you money. But when you take into account the purpose of your purchase – that’s a trickier thing. Although you should care about style, that doesn’t mean your budget should go out the window. If you end up getting something you were never planning to buy – it’s pretty much impulse buying. What’s even worse? If it turns out that purchase only adds to a large group of similar items at home! Then you’ll start thinking about what you could’ve spent that money on instead – like another kind of clothing that’s more useful for you right now.

BAD Style Tip #8 – Expensive = Better Quality

Some tend to think the price tag accurately reflects quality. But if you go with price alone when you buy any clothes – you’re not seeing the bigger picture. There are more important details to consider if you want to identify quality clothing. And “expensive” doesn’t automatically mean these details have been covered well. Suits/Shirts Type of stitching (# of stitches per inch) Weight of the fabric Collar construction Leather Shoes Production method (are they totally handmade?) Sturdy heel & sole (are they glued well?) Strength of the shoelaces If you want to master the art of inspecting clothes – you’ll have to be patient (as in look around in multiple stores) and willing to ask questions. It’s a shopping skill you can’t develop overnight.

BAD Style Tip #9 – Copy The Latest Trend / Celebrity Style

Take a look at Justin Bieber’s transformations over the years. He first entered the music scene as a wholesome teenybopper – with a purple hoodie and a bob cut. He’s now been sporting tank tops, plus an undercut with dangling long hair on one side. Younger guys have tried to copy his different looks. But those styles aren’t that classy or gentlemanly, are they? Celebrities may look like models – but they’re not necessarily role models. They compete for millions of fans with short attentions spans. It’s part of the job to reinvent themselves now and then by changing up their style. So clearly, not every “trend” will have the same effect on you as it has on them.

BAD Style Tip #10 – You Need More Stuff

Does buying more clothes make you more stylish? No – it can actually mean the opposite. A cluttered closet only bothers you with loads of options. It messes with your understanding of what’s you. So stop buying crap. Purchase only what you need to live the life you choose. The problem with owning “junk” items is they can cause you to underdress or overdress (and there’s a fine line between looking sharp for the occasion and being overdressed/awkwardly dressed). An impressive style isn’t showy or distracting – it draws a positive kind of attention. Your personality, profession, the environment you live in – all of it matters in being your stylish best.