#i'd rather be crafting

[freckliedan]

i would love to read an essay on left handedness in all of dan and phil crafts + especially the right handedness of dan in the end of Slime.

#i could write it but i'd rather read it #jam posts #dan and phil crafts #dan and phil #phan #dapc

[scriptlgbt]

Help.

[Fri 19 May 2023] [death, terminal illness]

Hey, it’s mod nat again. My last living grandparent is terminally ill and I’d like to visit her for her birthday, and have her meet my partner of more than 8 years for the first time. My grandma has idiopathic pulmonary fibrosis, which she’s had diagnosed for about 3 years. (Life expectancy with PF is 3-5 years on average.) I only was able to for the first time in roughly 10 years last fall due to my being no contact with my parents (+ rest of family by extension) from 2014-2021.

We need to fundraise for transportation to the greater Tkaronto/Toronto area from so-called “Ottawa” where I live. Both my partner and I are disabled and on social assistance, so can’t otherwise afford transportation.

Me at 3 1/2, playing with plasticene with my grandfather. I wouldn’t have had access to this photo, or any from my childhood, if you folks hadn’t helped me fundraise to get to my grandpa’s funeral back in 2021. It means a lot and I thank you.

Breakdown of funds needed:

~$80 CAD for transport there (we’re getting a ride part of the way there through my sibling)

~$100 CAD for transport the way back

$??? CAD for lodging (I don’t know the amount but want to reimburse the person covering it for me)

$?? CAD for food/other necessities

Helping would mean me getting to talk to a grandparent as my real self, when I wasn’t able to before, despite coming out as trans a dozen years ago.

If you want to help but can’t provide funds:

please consider registering to be an organ donor so that when you’re gone one day, other people can live. here’s the ontario link.

if you’re local to the GTA and can provide a place to sleep (especially an accessible one) in the future please reply (don’t DM, this is not my personal account)

if you’ve benefitted from the work I’ve done here, vouching for my character and realness in the reblogs makes a real difference in this kind of thing.

[ Link to donate ]

#it's really hard to write something so personal that's meant to be able to be reblogged #there's so much I'd go into in a post that's meant to help educate someone but #it's not the same when you're asking for help #rather than being a helper #also yeah the link says my name is buttons #this is something I do not have capacity to change rn #new cute nickname just dropped my partner said #(I was selling buttons at a craft show like a year ago and messed around with that idk) #one day I want to learn to drive and then I can just rent a car instead #mod nat #donation post

[cinna-bunnie]

i made these chokers today (⁠ ⁠･ั⁠﹏⁠･ั⁠)

there's this kuromi one which was the first as a test kinda

and then this other one w a moon and asymmetrical spikes

and then I've just been playing around with different necklace combinations and hanging earrings from it too

OH i CAN wear this w my other chokers too

#i dont do physical crafts as much as i should tbh . this was a lot of fun ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ #the kuromi was an earring that was missing its other half and it was partially what set off this chain of events #kinda feel like I'd rather have a similar one w deer leather like the moon one but idk.

[martilyongabo]

EO3 (partial) lineup - November-December 2022

Peak MAbo is collaborating with your best friend for a(n admittedly unfair) final project (for web development!!!! an elective!!!), saying you would post it, forgetting about it for a year, posting it on Artstation and forgetting about it again.

As always, AC drew the lineart, and I colored. Designs were more of a collaborative effort between the two of us!

Probably should have shared this when the HD collection came out... anyway it's here now!

Some design ramblings under the cut :0! There's a lot i wanna share especially given that we recently did a soft rewrite that departed from the guild system entirely ^^" and EO3's cast was actually one of the first that we had, surprisingly!

Micah is quite clearly alt gladiator 3, but in an entirely different profession. instead of going into the labyrinth, he works in what i imagine would be an analogue to the forge in Tharsis (aka helping people make things busted af). It probably works best for his character, since he was always a gizmo freak even in his first iteration! geomagnetic (or submagnetic, ugh) gizmo is AC's idea!

Micah's brother, Eva, is a very loose spin on zodiac 3, but with a wayyyy lighter colour palette. Admittedly, i did steal a little bit of the spiritmaster's coat from bravely default, but AC managed to spin it back to resembling the original coat that the class had. Eva works as an astronomer, hence the little telescope he always has on him.

Next up we have Eva's protégé, Miri (who was imported from AC's stories)! Theoretically, Miri would be a second zodiac, and, after watching some EO3 speedruns, would probably be really strong in the earlygame when working with Eva in an actual playthrough. AC's design heavily borrows from Patho II's Grace, hence the coat + dress combo.

Following Miri in this lineup would be Noa, her admittedly very lazy but clingy sibling. I think it's apparently here that we didn't have much time to filter what a believable design would be in an EO setting, given that Noa's clothes were translated directly from our designs of them in school attire. It's actually funny how for we diverged from their original portrait (buccaneer 3) to the point that she is literally unrecognizable. Truly a pipeline from good sea boy to j-horror twist character.

Last in the OC section would be Masaru, who recently found work for the Senatus. Admittedly he does have another example of "incongruent time period" clothing (the jacket), though it's a lot more reworkable than Noa. We also made his design a lot less poofy and rugged compared to the original, and I mixed the base and alt color palettes as well to make him less, well, glaringly red. Probably one of the funnier things is that his clothing palette made him blend in more with the likes of Kujura, but given that they work for the same place, it'll probably work out fine.

Now we go onto NPCs, and who better to start than with Flowdia! Admittedly, her art was one of the last ones that we did, hence why her design looks relatively plain (sorry lola). Probably one of the things I would like to add would be more ornate patterns, perhaps of butterflies to tie her closer to Gutrune!

Before we get to the Princess, we gotta get through her bodyguard first! >:0 I honestly don't like Kujura because I answered honestly in his first question, and he said that I was prideful, but AC likes him so he looks really good here. He isn't as rendered here as he is in his portrait, since he was also one of the last characters we made, and I didn't really get to notice that he doesn't have as much value contrast in his clothing as Masaru does. Probably something to think about next time I color him >:0

Next up we have Gutrune!! We decided to make her look more jellyfish-like, while still keeping it a bit uncanny and unsettling. We tried to give her a more traditionally Filipiniana look (mostly on the Maria Clara gown), but we haven't yet made a poncho design that mixes well with butterfly sleeves without looking cluttered. As such, she has a more nightdress-y look here. AC drew in a few tentacles, and I couldn't help but make them look squishy.

Last but not least is Olympia! We wanted to align her appearance more with her background, hence her altered design :0 Having rips of the artbook easily accesible online also helped us flesh out her hair in particular, since we didn't want to just transplant Gutrune's hairstyle onto her.

And that's all of them!!! I'm honestly hoping to draw more EO characters, though Seyfried's design scares me (honestly the reason why I couldn't make a Reversed Emperor comic).

Currently, I've made a lot of progress on the EO4 game, and I'm excited to draw up the three N-turned-PCs + Xiuan >:'0!!! I don't think I can ever get as cool as Morika tho. If you've come this far and aren't into EO, please check out their blog!! Their art is stunning and has come a really long way :")

#etrian odyssey #etrian odyssey 3 #etrian odyssey iii #idylls of the abyssal forest #gawang abo #colorist #noa minjin #miranda minjin #gutrune #olympia #kujura #flowdia #micah abdelghani #eva abdelghani #I'LL GIVE THEM SURNAMES WHEN I NEED TO #honestly why i never got to finalize work on the CR x RGU series is not just because I wanted to animate it #but also because i had to give the students surnames #like ye they're ~10 characters but surnames don't come easy to me >:'000 #and i'm super particular with names so :AAA: #issa trap i'd rather sidestep entirely #also if you follow me for CR... hi i'm sorry but i reverted back to my oldest brainrot to cope with thesis + the new game updates #NOT TO SAY THE NEW UPDATES ARE BAD #but i realized i cared more about crafting a story than following along the trail of another :") #i still want to work on the CR stories and animate them and put them up! #it's just that i need time to recoup i guess #community is also really buck wild. I don't think i ever got over the whiplash of them saying “we will not play *ends up excited anyway*” #it's ok if u enjoy it naman but the speed in which they get stoked for updates was like “:”D? i thought we were protesting. what y'all doin #i'm sorry if u read thru all these tags and saw me processing my trauma with the cr fandom #i'm doing a lot better now!!! please have a good day as well and take care of yourself! #EDIT 04.27.2024 THEY ALL HAVE SURNAMES. HURRAH!

[chiropteracupola]

after a few days’ work, my tiny version of the Werthers Waistcoat is complete!

it was very fun trying to imitate @vincentbriggs‘s original (which can be seen here and here) and despite the difference in scale, I tried to do my best to match the construction methods as best as I could throughout. 

the major differences are all owing to the scale difference - I haven’t yet figured out how to do functioning and nice-looking buttons and buttonholes at this size, and the gold was really starting to flake by the time I got to that point, so those are rather hasty embroidery and pins instead, and I’ve skipped the pockets and pocket flaps entirely.

I was considering cutting the wrappers down to match the original stripes better, but it was tricky enough to hold the larger chunks of plastic in place while sewing as it was, so I left them whole instead.  overall, I expected most of the components to be a lot more stiff and bulky than they actually ended up being, and aside from having to remake the back several times, everything went surprisingly smoothly, and I’m quite pleased with the results!

#em makes stuff #unfortunately I disarticulated one of his knees by accident along the way and so full-length photos weren't really an option #I'd have liked to take some directly imitating the ones of the original waistcoat but that'll have to wait #tiny keith here is perfectly nine inches tall and while it makes him pleasant to sew for it also means he fits pretty much no standard #miniature furniture... I may have to set up a really tiny lathe and start woodturning my own I guess! #also amused that I was able to pull this off with only materials that I already had! #the fronts are a rather stiff craft store cotton and the back is a Something that I found under a bookshelf #but they do manage to resemble the original fairly well!

[the-bloody-sadist]

#poll #writing advice #or just interesting bits that might help you out in your writing endeavors as well! #I really like to break down the intricacies of writing when I can #there's just so much between the lines #I might even take some good fanfics and break them down #I'd do bad fanfics too but I'd rather not just for their writer's sake because they didn't ask for all that #fanfics can really show a person's passion for the craft since it's always a hobby not a job #that's why I love fanfics more than professional literature sometimes #enough tags? #lmao

[greppelheks]

I've really actively been working on myself for the past ten years, only to realize the way I was trying to be, just ain't for me.

I've gotten rid of my social anxiety, I've learned how to do small talk and be really good at it, I've learned how to be in groups and how to communicate, I've learned how to connect with others, step out of my comfort zone and get rid of my fear of trying new things.

And now I'm like huh... I'm actually happiest at home in my comfort zone. Its not that I can't do all the things I could never so anymore, but I don't really want to? Its kinda peaceful.

#personal #I'm so happy I learned all those things #because I do feel more connected to people and I'm more at ease around them and myself #but I worked towards having a normal life so much #a life I saw others live where they had lots of friends and social outings and cool hobbies #and I'm like I could do all those things now #but I'm actually happiest with one max two social outings a week for maybe an hour or two #and I'm not all that interested in cool hobbies I'd rather do crafts and cooking and going for walks #and it's like.... acceptance #it's ok to live a smaller life #a bigger life would make me unhappy #it's actually so funny (read: frustrating) #because I had to ACTIVELY learn how to do all these things I've gotten really good at it #only for me to realize that most people #(the people I thought I had to be like) #are actually pretty bad at it #so now I'm the best conversationalist and host and deep questions asker and connector #and most people I meet aren't actually all that good at it #so now I'm the designated social person #and I'm like no thank you :) #endless books and videos and therapy to learn at how to talk connect communicate only to realize most people hardly do it lmao #I'll never understand the way people communicate I've been studying it for years but it doesn't make sense to me

[vraska-theunseen]

just remembered i'm going to be 20 this year can everyone give a moment of silence. teenager was so endless and it's going to be over before i know it this is my life and it's just flying by and i feel like im only ever just incidentally moving through life and like i'm never doing all i could be doing never feeling like i'm living my life the way i'd be living in it if i really cared but i don't want to try to change that bc rotting in bed is so appealing lol

#except when i hang out with or talk to friends that's the only time i feel like im alive #and it's not like an i feel like im not doing enough when im working my ass off legitimately doing nothing lol #but id rather just rot in bed and have no work ethic and not make time to shower like a. just an awful aimless person LMAO #<- he worked so slow today like he always does and messed shit up and has to go in early to try and catch up and he's so mad about it #working with a partner stresses me out bc i want to do things and then i worry im cutting them out of it and also doing it badly and im #gonna ruin it for both of us and they could've done it better and they're going to hate me and i've never done anything right whateverrrrr #i want to live in a room where i can do my little crafts and learn things at my own pace and hang out with friends and go to events all the #time. and i feel like im a bad person for that because everyone has to participate in society in SOME aspect part time or volunteering or #whatever. the make text post button is like therapy for me i like to imagine this is what i'd say if i had a therapist lol #alex talks

[alarming-prism]

this yarn was given to me nearly four years ago and i've been saving it for the right project. i think i've always known it would be socks of some kind but crochet socks take more yarn than knit socks and that was all i could manage before.

i'm still playing yarn chicken but it'll be okay? maybe? either way, i'm in love with these. the wool is so soft too.

#knitting #crafting shenanigans #i know i can find more of this yarn online but i'd rather not #i'm trying to work with my stash and buying another skein to use a fifth of it just #doesn't help me #so i'm hoping this'll be enough to finish the second sock

[feroluce]

incredibly sexy of you to be blankshipping on main and in the tags <3 and with incredible takes and ideas on top of that!

Thank you Anon, it's so hard having the biggest dick in the room, but someone has to do it 😔

As a slightly? more serious answer, I think it's good and even important to have people being loud and proud and totally self-accepting on main in the proship circles. Like there needs to be someone showing the people who got bought in on the anti stances and are then beating themselves up for totally normal things that it's ok. You aren't a bad person just for liking something problematic about a play-pretend character in a make-believe scenario and you don't need to sink into self-loathing over such a thing.

Because some of them are in actual agony over this stuff, and some of them have already accepted this about themselves but are too deep in the anti circles now, so they'd lose their entire support system if they were outed. Not to mention how creepily violent and invasive antis get about proshippers- and as someone in actual anti spaces, you'd have a front row seat to all the atrocities people would wish on you, or maybe even go so far as to commit them themselves.

Like you know how people talk about extremely strict religious parents? How they would try to control a lot of the thoughts and actions in their child's life? And then sometimes even get violent when they didn't comply? All while excusing it as trying to keep them from sinning or being a bad person? It's the exact same thing. And it has a lot of the same effects, too. Antis aren't beating the problematic out of each other. They're just plain beating and traumatizing each other and then making each other into better liars who secretly hang out on the proship servers on the downlow.

And it sucks! It sucks so bad! Because I've talked to people in those exact situations and like. Especially the fact that a lot of them are still young. Like barely young adults. Some of them are still technically teenagers. They shouldn't be dealing with this bullshit at what's already such a tender and difficult age. And it makes my heart ache and my blood boil because some of them are outright scared and there's just not a lot that I can do about it. You can't shield or protect someone from all of that and it sucks.

So like yeah I'm gonna be noisy and annoying and yowl right on main because at least with that I can give people somewhere to go where they feel decently safe and accepted, even if they never interact once. That's what got us the blankshipping server, because our creator was in the anti servers while sending me blankshipping asks and decided "you know what this sucks actually" lol. That's what brought in a lot of our members, because I could yell my heart out into the void here and! People heard! And then they joined the server and found a place they could finally breathe! And it's so much fun in there now!! ♡

Anyway tl;dr thank you dear lovely Anon you are entirely correct I am incredibly sexy and everyone desires me carnally and my dick is huge and I haunt the submas servers with how I live in their minds rent free skzjkdksjd

#my heart goes out to the people caught in such terrible sticky situations like this #I got an ask once where they forgot to put it on anon and then got a dm from the same person where they were PANICKING about it #because they were so scared that I was going to accidentally out them by answering the ask #(if you see this sweetheart then I hope you know I'm rooting for you and I've never told a soul- not even my fellow shippers; #that secret comes with me to my grave) #this is also why I always keep anon on- I'd rather let the people in hiding or on the fence interact safely than not at all #like god but for real though #my biggest respect to the shippers who are able to lay low and control themselves #they used my name to test the blackout/censorship/whatever you call it function in the anti server and like #I just know if I'd been online at the time I wouldn't have been able to help myself #I would have given up my secret identity in a heartbeat for the bit #because it was just a bunch of people chanting my name like they were playing Bloody fuckin Mary and I woulda popped my head in there like #'yes you rang' BSKKDJXKDKDK #funniest fucking thing I'd ever seen it made my entire week I was in PUBLIC at the time out to lunch with my MOTHER #do you guys have any idea how horribly I must have failed at keeping a straight face BSKDKJZKSKKKD #and then I accidentally got drunk on too much rum and went to a craft show it was a good day dfkljadfkakda #I used to love seeing the blocklists every week too because my name was always at the top but then they started alphabetizing it rude orz #I think the last one I saw was from somewhere else though bc it wasn't alphabetized and DINGO was 2nd from the top while I was way below #*shakes fist* HOW DARE YOU DINGO #I almost didn't wanna answer this ask I wanted to keep it because it gives me warm fuzzies thank you anon haha #the horrors never cease but fun little things like this make it easier <3 #ask #answer #anon

[icewindandboringhorror]

Literally cannot comprehend that some people just... go places.. I know someone who just got back from a 2 week vacation and then the day they came home they went out to eat at a restaurant (at a busy time mind you, like 7pm on a saturday night!!) and then went to a mall to shop and then woke up early for brunch the next day and were at a bar in the afternoon and so on and so on and it’s like... god don’t you get tired of being places? If I go grocery shopping for 20 minutes on monday and then have a doctor appointment on tuesday, I am SO tired of leaving the house that I want to do nothing for the next two weeks lol...  Doing multiple major tasks/trips in one day and ENJOYING it and SEEEKING IT OUT is utterly inconceivable to me..  we are different creatures entirely lol

#not even regarding how irresponsible it is to be constantly doing stuff during the pandemic and etc. etc. like EVEN before the pandemic #I felt this way exactly the same. I just do not understand the human compulsion to be Doing Things (tm). And it's not that I don't enjoy #SOME things #like very hyperspecific things in controlled environments scheduled 10 days ahead of time and intricately planned lmao #but like there is some stuff I enjoy so it's not like I just hate everything but it's just... ghghhhhhhhhhh #like what are you running away from something? is it unberable for you to be alone with yourself so you have to be like #constanly up and out and finding new sensory shit to throw yourself into or like??? #I am legitimately not exaggerating comepltely 100% fine not leaving my house for months at a time (aside from going on walks to get excercis #e just around the block/still within the neightbohood and occasional necessary grocery trips to stock up on food obviiously) #I simply do not posess the impulse to go out to restaurants or bars or go to clubs and dance or go to parties or concerts #OR even travel like...?? idk I guess it's not terrible but in the past when I have traveled I've found that the only things #I could name that I enjoyed about the experience were like.. I like being on hotels because you get free breakfast sometimes and they have #TV and air conditioning and better beds than I do at home. I like people watching from my room windows. I like being in airports because #of the way they;re designed and I like to pearch somewhere and watch people and watch clouds and planes taking off. #I enjoy being on airplanes because the windows feel cold and you can look at clouds and sometimes have gingerale. #but I dont enjoy the traveling or going places itself. I'd rather be at home working on my hyper-specific interest hobbies lol #legit not joking at al if I won tickets to like an all expenses paid super luxury tropical getaway I would sell them and use the money to #buy craft supplies. I would get 10000x more personal fulfilment and joy being able to work on a new project or having the money to pay off #bills or buy better groceries or get an apartment with a better bathroom or something like that than I would having the one time #experience of like wow I looked at a cool beach and some sunsets and ate at restaurants a lot #And maybe the thing is like. I don't value experiences? I value resource security and pratical progress at things #and not in a like workaholic capitalist way but just in a like.. I value more what's going to make me happy in the LONG run than temporary #expeirences that are somehow supposed to mean something to me in the moment (yet I usually derive no pleasure or meaning from at all) #Like I would rather use money to invest in my niche hobbies or crafts or personal improvement or getting a more comfortable #bed or better shoes for my foot pain or etc. etc. than I would spending the money to go out to a resuarant or travel or etc. #ALSO again like.. in addition to it simply not seeming worth it because my brain rarely is able to conceptualize the value of those sorts of #experiences.. it's also just SO tiring to do things! Even a grocery store trip can be overwhelming with sensory stuff and social things #and etc. etc. and I just realize like.. all the things people have told me are Fun are not Fun for me. I grew up and realized you actually #have no obligation to do things. I found out you can spend your birthday at home alone eating a waffle and playing your favorite video game #and I have never went anywhere or done an activity on my bday since lmao.. 'Doing Things' is just hard for me to grasp still really lol

[seventh-district]

.

#Seven’s Public Diary #vent post #cw vent post #vent #cw vent #wound mention #sighs deeply #had to take my shirt off for someone recently for medical reasons and while 'oh you poor thing..' is far from the worst response ive gotten #it's definitely still strange to hear. like i'm not rlly surprised‚ i am aware that i'm an upsetting sight #and i keep myself covered all the time to avoid upsetting people that can't handle the sight of marred skin #but i've grown so comfortable in my body over all these years that an interesting side effect of that is that i tend to forget #just how shocked and upset and worried ppl tend to get when they see me. it's almost funny. the sad kind of funny i guess #guess i'd rather laugh than dwell on the knowledge that i'm a set of walking trigger warnings that must be censored #anyways. that experience combined with the stressful and tiring process of tending to a wound on my back for the last 2 weeks #has me thinking about Ch. 5 of AEIWNF. for... reasons. so maybe i'll finally make myself draft and post that today #there's so many things i need to make myself do but the appeal of just sitting alone weaving bracelets and binge-listening to TMA is strong #the urge to be alone and craft things while listening to stories told through a lo-fi medium... where does it come from #that's a rhetorical question i know exactly where it came from. i'm just turning into both of my grandmothers lmao #what's the line. 'i've got my grandmother's veins in the back of my hands' what's that from. it's a Wonder Years song right #Hoodie Weather!!! yeah that's it. man i haven't listened to that in ages. maybe that'll be today's weather report #anyways. what else can i vent about. uhh. it's getting harder and harder to put my thoughts into words and that's concerning! #i'm fighting the desire to push everyone away again even though it feels like i should. i'm too toxic of a person #like. talk to any of the people that have ghosted/blocked me and they'll likely tell you to stop wasting your time on me lmao #and they'd probably be right. i'm so caught up in my own issues that i feel bad for anyone that tries to be friendly to me #everyone gets sick of my shit eventually. i'm overbearing and self-centered or you don't hear from me for months. there's no inbetween #i wish there was. god i wish there was #i'm never active on here anymore bc i feel like if i am then that's disrespectful to everyone waiting to hear back from me #but it's so much easier for me to post and reblog stuff than it is to talk one on one with literally anyone #it's not even social anxiety atp there's just something wrong with my brain. like not to self diagnose but Something's Wrong #okay that's enough whining. gonna go try to do something productive to make myself feel less useless

[knowlesian]

my last post and the shameless mountain goats reference i threw in there got me thinking about one of my favorite story beats, because it combines a lot of character work and thematic oomph in one: ed being a victim of his own legend and ability to protect himself by hiding in plain sight + codeswitch into the version of himself that best suits the company/situation he’s in, in many ways but often most visibly through his interactions with izzy.

my take on “is blackbeard real or fake” has always been “yes”; blackbeard is pieces of ed filtered and strained and assembled and pruned down in ways that scarred him even as they kept him safe, in ways that are very sad and often stretching the definition of safe as far as ed’s personal definition of murder. nonetheless: it got him to the place he's at, still alive. could he have done it another way? who knows! that was the way he did it, it's the way he knows will work because it did work.

or: he thinks he knows that. but the legend was never all of ed and in fact demanded he spotlight pieces of himself he doesn't like so much a lot and repress a lot of the things that make him feel good, it’s not helping/hurting anymore. it’s just dragging him down.

so ed is sick of the blackbeard schtick; and here’s the rub. if he’d been worse at the art of personal fuckery alongside the pirate type, maybe none of this is happening. the world never knows his name; or worse, once he gets spotted as a man who won't kill they mock it. 

that version of ed does not attract izzy ‘ask me about my boner for the sunk cost fallacy’ hands, or does not keep him. because izzy has built his identity around ed’s legend; who is blackbeard’s first mate, if there is no blackbeard? who the fuck even is izzy hands, if he’s not seated at the right hand of edward teach?

now. you would hope, in a better world, that izzy would be like you know, edward, the thing here is: you wanting something different involves emotional consequences for me. i would have to figure out my whole life over again and i am simultaneously con o’neill’s age and emotionally sixteen like the real world me was, so you can see that would be super complicated. i have so fucking much baggage and you are just adding to it, and i do not like that. also: this fucks up my work situation and my home life at once, it makes me feel sad and abandoned and itchy in ways i do not wish to label with words because they would be gay ones like ‘please don’t leave me, i love you and i thought it was mutual’ so like... world rocked, thoroughly and in ways that make me want to rant until past last call, in conclusion this sucks and i think it's twenty mistakes in a trenchcoat, some of them maybe life threatening! i wish you would not.

and then he would step back and let ed make his own fucking choices anyway and either do the work to figure himself out in the same space or finally grab those cds from the car and find his own place to do the same, because a shitty fact of adult life is sometimes people cannot be what we want or need. sometimes that is because they suck: sometimes, it’s just because they can’t or don't want to, and that isn't them being mean or withholding. they don't owe us more than the basic kindness and dignity we all owe to each other just because we put in our hours longing for them to do so. that’s some toxic, entitled shit. understandable! an impulse i share at times! but we should never be That Guy (gender neutral) because the friendzone doesn’t actually exist and nobody deserves to win someone else as a prize for hanging around long enough and driving them to the airport. that’s just called being friends, etc.

izzy is sadly currently stuck on being That Guy. so instead of realizing ed is an adult man and can make his own choices, even if izzy thinks they're bad ones, he fucking panics and starts swinging around and finally runs to big daddy england to make stede bonnet stooooooooop (messing with ed’s brain).

and of course he does something like that! he thinks a relationship is when you metaphorically own each other and when you can only be tender after putting your right foot in and then putting it out before once again putting it in and then proceeding to shake it all about, violent rituals unlock love style. he’s a desperate man in a hell entirely of his own making.

and so is ed, in this entirely different way but stuck in his own fucking orbit as firmly as izzy, only ed is trying to claw his way up and out to see what else he can be, while izzy would do juuuust about anything (including lick the king’s boots) to stay the same forever.

that’s some tragic shit. i love this writing team, the end.

#what if i staple no children to their heads when they're together what then #truly this is some good writing #like: i find izzy fascinating because he was written by the same team who wrote everybody else #he sucks in ways that i want to think about because they sometimes allow me to examine myself #and then sometimes let me laugh at his dumb ass or talk about serious thematic shit #he bears a lot of weight in the narrative because that's in part what a good antagonist should do #anyway yeah the sort of classic tragedy of these two is super interesting since like...clearly the show knows what's up #i maintain izzy is gonna figure his shit out and become a productive member of this pirate society tho #because okay like: in real life i know the best i can often hope for is somebody knocking a specific behavior off #and often they won't ever do that #but if they did the world would be better and they would be better and i would have another comrade #i will always settle for one less enemy if that is my only choice #but i'd rather make a new ally i can trust #and my fantasy is often that the izzys of the world in all their forms don't just knock it off #it's that they start fighting alongside me or become someone i don't mind being around because i CAN trust them now #(hey: i did say it was a fantasy) #so i kind of ask myself: what makes life better in this fictional world #an izzy who can't hurt people because he is no longer around or an izzy who has started to figure his shit out #anyway yes: this shit is sad and well-crafted

[cantankerouscatfish]

there are like 5000 ''major'' movies, series, and books I've have seen a lot about, and been recommended a bunch, and I just... don't. unless someone drags me unwillingly.

but I can usually get media references! I know what a Chewbacca is, kinda! and Spiderman! I played Half Life and Portal a little while ago so now I get those jokes after however many years! that was nice.

#never underestimate my ability to not do a dang thing at all ever. #this is half bc I'm a snooty bastard and half bc I'm a complete idiot who forgets everything the moment it's out of my eyeline #but mostly bc I'd rather put music on and putz around online or do a craft rather than Sit Still And Watch A Thing zzz #music videos are cool though. I will sit and watch a music video. #I'll watch 20+ in a row. thank you youtube for allowing us to make custom playlists.

[skitterjitter]

my father got me a needle felt kit for my birthday and turns out I don't like the process very much -- it takes too much patience that I just don't have, plus the wool irritates my skin, eyes, nose and throat, so even if I didn't mind the process I'd still be having a hard time

#Ryn rambles #I suppose the important thing is that I at least tired it #I'm extremely sensitive so this doesn't surprise me #newspaper leaves me with itchy skin and eyes; sore throat and runny nose too #I don't think it really matters if I'm allergic or just hypersensitive #if I'm not having a good time and not enjoying myself that why should I push myself through it? #it's not like knitting; crochet or needlework #even when I'm upset and frustrated I still want to continue #but needle felting just makes me go 'mmm no I'd rather be doing something else right now' #important to note: this is not me being dismissive of the craft as a whole! #I'm happy if you do like and enjoy it! genuinely! #it's just not for me though I can still appreciate the time and effort that went into making the end product

[avinox]

Seeing my boyfriend painfully force himself to play DAI is making me realize how bad this game really is. Like wow.

#like i really tried to enjoy it #but I'd rather just read the companion's stories and that's it #i still like most of the companions and how solas was written #but the rest of it. from the gameplay to the crafting to the main quest. it's bad #it's painful for me to watch