#i'm going to make individual ones too

[courtmartialme]

I have a question. Also, you're my favorite Royai artist (the characters as individuals and together). You've mentioned that you consider Riza autistic many times, but have you ever given your support for why you think that? I'm just curious what your thoughts are.

comparing to my own experience but it's common to see autistic people be taken as uninterested and rude for being unexpressive and blunt. so it's mainly about riza being presented as stoic and somewhat scary but gradually being shown she's very kind and fun and even makes bad jokes with a straight face (it's so moe........) but is bad at expressing that, which makes both other characters and viewers think she's always annoyed and no-fun when that's not true.. it's so important to me

she also barely understands other people's feelings and takes things too literally, or say things out loud you probably shouldn't

like at the hughes' funeral scene when roy says it's raining and riza's immediate reaction is to go "it's not??" LOL or when roy is coming up with problems as excuse to not fight ed in flame vs fullmetal and riza very promptly solves them...! it's all very Autism to me.. my mom works for arakawa and she told me it's true

basically:

(i haven't watched brotherhood in so long but i'm like 80% sure these panels i used are all scenes that didn't make it into the anime which is why i'm an avid brotherhood hater and you should read the manga)

#i !!! could go on but it's too long #and subjective i guess i dont want it to look like i'm reaching but it's so obvious TO ME ok !!!! #two wolves inside me one wants to reply to this with just 'arakawa told me' n the other wants to make a 50 page doc with visual evidence #they're the autism brothers #asked #also thank you...! i'm slightly surprised you like my roy individually he's just in my art to be accessory for riza #fma #riza hawkeye #will throw it in the tag fuck it !!!!!!

[uncanny-tranny]

A lot of people may scoff at the notion, but when you truly start learning more and more, you realize the binary between "you are disabled and I can recognize you as such" and "you are barely disabled, if that, and I can tell" are false dichotomies.

You will never completely understand the intricacies of somebody's disability, and even the most simple of disabilities ("simple" in the ableist way) can easily become life-threatening to a person, and vice versa. There's this glorification of the self for so many people that's done in such a way that their word feels like law, even if it robs others their own words.

#disability #i've probably talked about this before #but so many people take the idea of 'i can always tell' and make it almost an entire doctrine #it's the same mentality that makes people go 'i can ALWAYS tell trans people from the normal ones!' and they harass a cis butch #because what you're fundamentally doing is reaffirming the biases you were taught and then broadly applying them even when... #...it doesn't make sense or actively silences others. the doctrine of the self becomes too important becase it feels like that's your ego... #...that's YOU and YOU know best right? YOU know what 'should' and 'should not' disable people right? #and i think it's a natural response when you might not havs expanded your worldview and challenged it #so i'm not going to attack an individual for that but it does reinforce previously instilled biases

[justafriendofxanders]

i go back and forth a lot on my interpretations of ats s5, ie. what parts of spike are 'in character' or not, but the one thing that stays constant is my belief that spike and angel fucking would have fixed most of this.

#not that it would have fixed their problems i just mean it would introduce new problems that i would find entertaining as a viewer #anyways i don't like saying a character would NOT say/do that but sometimes i'm not sure if he (spike) SHOULD do that #in terms of showing off the more interesting parts of a character while also carving out a unique arc/dynamic for him on a new tv show #ats rw #i think what's misunderstood about spike is that he's NOT a solo sigma male lone vigilante bad boy action hero #like i think angel is actually the one who has a history of isolating himself #but spike is your friend who always has to be in a relationship (which i think btvs got correct with harmony) #idk. i think oz has that line in btvs where he's like 'i gotta go do that guy thing where i isolate myself now' #and i think that gets transposed onto spike when he goes on the 'guy show' doing 'guy things' #and then kinda blended up with the tension that many of the guys on ats experience between #being a tough guy capable of doing things on his own versus the desire to belong in a crew #but like. that's not a 'guy' thing that applies to all men. that's a thing that certain individuals experience. and spike is not one of the #like i don't think spike cares about how he fits in with society or the collective but i think he DOES care about how individuals #he's close to perceive him #anyways. today on 'reading too much into a tv show that stopped airing 20 years ago' #i gotta make a separate post about this #buffyposting

[briefobservationdreamer]

Kingdom Hearts Redemption Arcs: Isa/Saïx

To begin with, there are a few things to consider about Saïx when looking at his actions in the original Organisation. Firstly, he became a Nobody when he was a teenager, before critical parts of his psyche had fully matured, and because he was heavily groomed and gaslit into believing he couldn’t ever feel emotions while he remained a Nobody (more so than any other member), this guaranteed that this part of him would remain stunted. Secondly, he was suffering an unbearable amount of pain at the time that he clearly could not cope with and had to deal with inwardly on his own, but due to Xemnas’ gaslighting likely didn’t have the self-awareness or emotional intelligence at the time to understand what he was feeling and realise he was deceiving himself. Thirdly, he had been possessed by Xehanort for at least a good while before the events of Days and 2, possibly for years, and unlike Xigbar he was not even aware of it, let alone consensual of it. The details are very unclear as to how exactly this affected him, all we can know is that he became a much colder, crueller person who was still driven by Isa’s personal motivations and capable of consciously working against Xemnas. These things don’t lessen the pain he caused, but they are so intertwined with him that it is impossible to separate him from these influences to clearly determine how reasonable it is to expect self-control or for him to be any different, and therefore how much responsibility he has over his actions, let alone how much atonement he must do. Of all the atoners, his situation is easily the woolliest.

As for his actions, Saïx is a character with very clear reasoning and consistent motivations he never truly wavers from, so it’s fairly easy to understand why he did everything that he did.

The Castle Oblivion situation is a very tricky one, since we don’t know for sure how much of what happened came from Xemnas, Saïx or Axel’s own initiative. All we know is that Saïx gave Axel orders to eliminate some traitors that were sent to Castle Oblivion, which ended up being Marluxia and Larxene. However, since the founding members of the Organisation are either complicit in or directly responsible for keeping Saïx and Axel captive there since they were children, the plot against them can be justified as an act of self-defence. The only apprentice Isa is shown interacting with since the end of the original Organisation is Even/Vexen, and the two would have had to work out any differences for cooperation to be possible in their plot to betray Xehanort in KH3.

Taking Kairi away from Axel, imprisoning her and using her to antagonise Sora was all done on Xemnas’ orders as part of the plot to control Sora and have him complete Kingdom Hearts, and it is made very clear that openly defying Xemnas is tantamount to death. His final scenes in 2 imply that he never even really wanted to toy with Sora in the first place, he would much rather take his revenge on him in proxy of Roxas for taking his best and only friend away and instigating events that ruined his life (more on this in a bit). Isa has yet to properly interact with Sora or Kairi post recompletion, and so has not had any opportunity yet to apologise and personally make it up to them beyond his contribution to Xehanort’s defeat in 3.

Manipulating Roxas and Xion into killing each other was definitely messed up, but again was done under orders from Xemnas once it became clear the two couldn’t co-exist due to Xion’s out-of-control powers. Neither of which was Saïx’s fault. The pair can’t really blame him too much and say he shouldn’t have done it without expecting him to at least risk getting dusked or destroyed for them. It doesn’t make their situation any better, but it is understandable that Saïx would choose goals and a friend he sacrificed everything for over a decade over a couple of kids he didn’t even know and one of which he thought wasn’t a real person, accepting their fates as unfortunate and unavoidable collateral. 

Making Axel choose between a friendship with him and a friendship with Roxas and Xion was also complicated. While he was definitely trying to get Axel to choose him, Saïx wasn’t the source of this conflict, the situation itself was. Axel couldn’t help earn Xemnas’ trust and carry out Saïx’s plans to take control of the Organisation, find Subject X and get their lives back while he was deliberately defying Xemnas to protect Roxas and Xion. Jealousy was at play here, but Saïx was also laying out a cold hard truth that their interests were mutually exclusive, and by nobody’s fault. If we’re also including their confrontation in the manga when Axel tries to rescue Kairi, I fault Axel more than Saix here. Not only was Saïx at his most possessed here, he was also in Berserk form with limited awareness and memory, driven only by a desire to take out anything considered a threat, and Axel put Saïx’s life at risk the moment he turned his back on him and put him in a kill-or-be-killed situation.

Lastly, the main one people think of, his unnecessarily cruel treatment of Roxas and Xion. This is the only one not motivated at least partly by some form of preservation or ulterior motive. One big point to get out of the way is the fact that Saïx was fully aware of Xion’s nature from the get-go and she only ever looked like the white featureless animated mannequin Vexen showed him in the lab, no more human-looking than a Dusk, just dressed up in a black coat, and was likely under the impression from Vexen that she was merely an imitation of life. It’s understandable that perceptions like this would influence his treatment, though it was still a horrible way to treat someone regardless.

Sadly there is much more to it than that. His main reason for this is lashing out from suffering a colossal betrayal from Axel. He was forced to watch the three form bonds of friendship and get their hearts and humanity back while his own friendship with Axel crumbled and he remained empty, when out of all the organisation members, Saïx was the most desperate to get those things back. The only friend he had - and a friend he constantly risked his neck for - ditched and replaced him when he needed him most. Despite warning Axel that their interests were mutually exclusive, Axel still chose to abandon Saïx and an entire decade’s worth of goals Saïx had sacrificed everything for and did nothing to stop their destruction until it was almost too late, all to protect Roxas and Xion. He lost everything he still had and cared about in the name of the trio’s friendship, and he became a hollow broken man and a brainwashed slave trapped under the command of an abuser he hated with almost no hope of escape or happiness. To make things worse, at no point does he ever understand why his life has gone so horribly wrong. His treatment of Roxas and Xion was reprehensible, completely undeserved and unfair regardless of how much control he had and unjustified for as much control he did have (to Roxas and Xion at least, feelings of rage and betrayal towards Axel is completely justified), but I am sadly not surprised in the least that this was enough to drive him beyond breaking point.

What he did to make it up to the three though is something that often gets overlooked because of how subtly it was implied in game (and possibly some wilful ignorance and denial from Saïx haters), though Re:Mind helps a lot with this. As soon as he became more himself, he self-reflected, recontextualised his actions through his original values, felt remorse for what he did, put all his rage and jealousy and pain and pride aside, admitted his flaws and vulnerabilities, corrected toxic behaviour and saved the people he hurt. The idea to have Vexen and Demyx create and deliver the replicas for Roxas and Xion was his. He planned to bring back Roxas and Xion, betray Xehanort and orchestrate his defeat to save the world and craft the brightest future, and he risked his life to make that a reality. There is literally nothing more he could have done for them by this point in the story. The only thing I can fault with this is that it could have perhaps been made a bit clearer, an official apology is still owed and it wouldn’t have taken much effort to briefly add one during his “death” scene even if there is still a lot of talking out to do, though Isa is a man who speaks with actions more than words, and his actions spoke loud and clear. Overall, a great redemption that I can only fault for not getting quite enough spotlight.

(Interestingly his story has a lot of parallels with Riku, but with some critical differences. Riku was manipulated and possessed for a few weeks altogether, Saïx went through years of it, and secondly Riku turned against Sora after mistakenly believing Sora would abandon him and Kairi, while Saïx was absolutely abandoned by Axel when Axel turned against him.)  

#kingdom hearts #isa #kh isa #saix #kh saix #isa/saix #redemption arc #appreciation for isa/saix #i'm tired of people insisting he is just an awful person who did nothing to earn a place with the good guys when that is blatantly not true #he made mistakes but he absolutely deserves credit for what he did to make up for it that must have been a rough redemption for him #i was going to compare all the redemption arcs in one post but this got too big so I just did them as individual posts

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

So, Canada has decided to stop sending arms to Israel after an NDP motion. The Liberals made major amendments to it so as to firmly condemn Hamas as well. It's kind of a mixed bag. Honestly, it's naive of me but I didn't expect there would still be so much outrage, even if the motion did call for an acknowledgement of Palestine as a state. All the Conservatives voted against it - to be fair, some of them wanted to wait for the motion to be passed because the amendments were super last minute and the Bloc Quebecois were annoyed that because of this there wasn't a French translation.

I guess it's a step in the right direction. I think it's still weak but you can read more on it here.

Source 1, Source 2, Source 3

#I think the biggest thing that confuses me is that there are still comments about Israel being the only safe place for Jewish people #I don't doubt that - a large (I think unfortunately a majority) percent of the hate crimes this year #have been against Jewish people in my country #But uh... maybe the solution here is to work on making Canada (and the world in general) safer for Jewish people? #I know you can't change people's individual attitudes but really #i think saying 'ah yes jewish people will be safe in this place far away from us #where we don't have to deal with this issue in our own country. not anywhere else though' is... weird #also I think if your argument is genuinely that one group's safety has to come at the expense of an entire other group of people #you need to start thinking outside of such a limited narrow scope #storyrambles #<-i'll probably delete my tags after i'm just... sigh... #i know i'm naive to a degree but i really think these opinions are not... especially radical #also i think canada is reticent to show too much support because that might get conversations going around our occupation #of indigenous land and the landback movements #but that's my own thoughts and a separate (though related) matter

[beanghostprincess]

if i hear the vinsmoke name again i swear to fucking god i'll start world war iii against them

#I CAN'T STAND THEM #okay yonji is kind of funny and his voice does things to me but like #and they're power rangers which makes it really funny #and ichiji is like kind of cool?? cool hair #reiju is my goddess but when i talk about the vinsmokes i'm mostly referring to the men #i don't care about niji #honestly yeah just kill niji and judge i don't mind the others #still extremely angry at yonji and ichiji tho i hope they get hit by a fucking truck #and i don't say what kind of atrocities i want judge to go through bc then they report me or smth #black leg sanji #one piece #whole cake island #not tagging them individually bc that's too much effort

[xxlovelynovaxx]

Ah. "Animals rights" bullshit okay. Being animals that are not obligate herbivores and eating the flesh of other animals because of it is "oppressing" non-human animals. And they called out my comparing it to anti-choicers because "murder is different than death" okay well anti-choicers think abortion is murder. I don't happen to consider a human killing an animal for food murder any more than I consider an animal killing another animal for food murder, especially when as you pointed out yourself some people can't survive without meat.

Or is it a contract killing/hit on every animal You've ever eaten to survive? Are you just not a murderer because you paid not to get your hands dirty?

Like yeah it's fucking NATURAL. Humans aren't some wondrous ascended beings that don't crawl through the dirt. We fuck and fight and survive and yes, part of that survival for many is KILLING.

And it's good that you don't think people should be forced onto veganism because that would be as bad as the people who want to force all animals to eat synthetic meat and hunt via robots or whatever but my gods can you imagine telling someone who has been a vegetarian by choice for years for animal WELFARE purposes (not rights) who is vegan for disability reasons that they are "justifying the oppression of animals" and "killing animals for food is murder" when you literally can't go vegan for health reasons yourself? Okay murderer. Guess your life matters more than those oppressed animals.

Like sorry I'm going full "you're an asshole and I despise you and I'm genuinely sorry for myself that I thought we could be friends".

Like yeah the anti-choicer metaphor wasn't perfect. But it also got you to cut right to the heart of the matter. You are so divorced from humans as part of the ecosystem and food chain you genuinely believe we have some moral duty to not kill animals (but only animals, not plants or fungi, which are also living and have some measure of sentience) and to hold ourselves separate from the biosphere to the greatest extent possible.

That's just ecofascism 101. Are we gonna do the "any form of hunting or land management, even responsibly by indigenous stewards using traditional practices is bad" next? Or are we gonna avoid that one because you hopefully know better than THAT and simply think that removing humans from ONLY one part of the consumptive chain is ✨different✨?

For reference:

Also where does "choosing to die" come in to this? I wasn't talking about euthanasia, I was talking about withdrawing the life support provided by a human body if the owner of that body stops consenting to providing it, therefore depriving a fetus dependent on that life support for survival of said survival. I'm pretty sure the fetus doesn't have a choice in the matter. (Whether or not it's "alive" doesn't have much to do with anything since it's been made pretty clear that medical autonomy in terms of mandated use of your body's parts or resources is unethical at ANY point. Even if you ARE killing it, we've determined that's the most ethical option.)

Also if we're going to make bullshit oppression claims why don't we talk about transspecies people who are obligate carnivores?

#literally I'm not a fucking legalist but no I don't believe murder in the sense of nonconsensual killing is always wrong #like self defense. hello. #like maybe my moral system is just built different but to call it oppression and make me out to be some kind of bigot? #come on. that's bullshit and you know it. #we're literally not talking about rights being taken away. also this is why animal welfare is such a better concept than animal rights #stop anthropomorphizing animals!! stop treating them like furry humans that can't speak!! #literally somehow both a veganism centrist and an 'animal rights' person at once #go yell at people for literally having a moral-spiritual belief system that encompasses eating animals as neutral somewhere else #oh and btw don't EVER fucking moralize any kind of food related consumption around me again that goes for everyone #meat is neutral. sugar is neutral. artificial sweeteners are neutral. preservatives are neutral. plants are neutral. fish are neutral. etc #some of these may be unhealthy for a given individual and their production under capitalism may be fucking harmful #but conceptually they are neutral and there are ways of making them physically so by changing the harmful systems #you can keep feeling bad about your oppression of poor animals or w/e. or maybe you don't feel bad idk #I happen to find that far more harmful than humans who want or need to eat meat - doing so - will ever be #thanks for the mask off moment where you decided it was actually okay to moralize food and survival #I'm so happy to say goodbye forever #(note: if you know who this is don't fucking harass them. I have them blocked and am being a bit nasty *bc* they can't see it) #(I don't want them to suffer. I just think they're a monumental asshole. gods know I'm one too.) #(let people be assholes 2k23 lol)

[artificer-dice-mj]

The first time something works, it's a fluke.

The second time something works, it's a coincidence.

The third time it works, it actually works.

At least, this is the philosophy I use when making prototypes for things.

I finally reached the fluke stage of the prototyping process and just started the second test. I have a bit of cleaning up to do on it, but I have not been this confident about any of the other iterations and if I get consistent enough results, I can actually move on to other dice shapes! (As much as I just love making a ton of d6s, I just want to be able to move on to the others too)

#mj reinvents the wheel #it's showing progress now which is great #pictures coming soon #I really do hope the things I've learned on this one will translate over to the other shapes just as well #the nice thing about this as well is if the dice are master quality like I'm aiming for they would be better for molding #they're made of epoxy so they wouldn't inhibit silicone #but also I don't have to make a whole master and mold for a one-off commission #put the effort that would go into the making of the master into the final product instead #which just sounds ideal to me #because even if the master ended up perfect you'd still have to sand and polish the die again afterwards #so why not just cut out the middle steps? #plus it uses significantly less silicone to make one and I'm not stuck with a mold I'll only use once #and I may be able to find a use for the individual face designs if they're not too hyper-specific

[unproduciblesmackdown]

truly lmao 2024 lambda literary award finalist wynnstannery

#have probably already heard of these awards w/o absorbing it but has a sizable [twitter acct you follow follows this acct] overlap for one #wikipedia blurb ''to recognize the crucial role lgbtq writers play in shaping the world...celebrate the very best in lgbtq literature'' #Lol! naturally everyone set to laugh abt Individually being lambda award finalist Authors amidst 40+ anthology contributors. sure #and of course oh absolutely crucial cam stone page. we did make the back of book blurb too after all #born of [crucially soph nothingunrealistic (a) investigates that akd role which (ai) leads to me also checking it out. later (b) #investigates this Call For Submissions For All Trans F&F Zine which (bi) leads to me going ''oh so true cam stone Needs to be there''] #all originating in The Wrong Fake ''Fans'' Show Up For Billions By Way Of Beloved Character Winston lmao #b/c fr imagine the trans f&f zine Doesn't have a Did You Know That???? page abt a delightful akd role & canon nonbinary f&f character #but this amidst Plenty of ''fake'' ''wrong'' ''fans'' messing around w/the concept of Fast & Furious as a Work throughout #as i said & got the feedback of [hell yes You Get It] that the premise Guarantees you get a very Varied & inherently Playful response #not b/c playfulness need be ''unserious'' but it sure need not be ''serious.'' like f&f itself; as part of [the premise guarantees it] #& that the Range of ways ppl can approach this broad concept is like the Range of ways ppl can approach the broad concept of Gender lol #& not Unearnest but needing no Gravitas / ''serious'' ''legitimacy'' guaranteed in turn to ''validate'' your efforts #and your not being the ''right'' or ''expected'' audience getting the perhaps straight(tm)forwardly intended experience here lmao #so in many ways it did feel very resonant / relevant to wynnstannery #embracing [the one use of: editor's note!] and [the one use of: the word ''autistic''!] #2 trans 2 furious #which is probably gonna get a physical reprint sooner than later; pdfs still available despite the lack of link there #was already The Intention if vaguely so; now with the added ''can put the 2024 Lambda Award Nominee / Finalist on the cover lol'' #page 54 (i believe) brought to you by a couple of quantnoisseurs; rushed to finish last minute then ft. some post deadline edits lmao #classic....nonzero other works i've Heard Of! nice #which: sure does seem like the focus here is like ''did you hear about these books? :)'' as many ''awards'' can ultimately be #like i Am hearing about them now. had seen abt Being Ace on twitter interesting interesting. hi honey i'm homo hell yeah #do we have one or two f&f films left? put cam stone cameo in there for real. Fast furious worth the effort worth the cost #& just shoutout to the like bifurcation of Akd Role Types. [intense in a relatively restrained affect way. some dramatic flair for sure] #and [spontaneous! vivacious! bright! playful! pretty emotionally open!] that's right lmao

[lwoorl]

I'll say it: "Oh all AI artists do is write a stupid description and immediately get an image with no effort, there's no art in that" is the new "Digital painting doesn't count as art because it takes no effort"

#Look I'm aware there're moral reasons to criticize AI art such as how corporations will use it #and the fact lots of models (not all however) use stolen content #But all you have to do is visit a forum dedicated to AI art to quickly realize it actually takes some effort to make quality images #And honestly from what I've seen those guys are often very respectful of traditional artists if not traditional artists themselves #Not a single bit of 'haha those idiots are working hard when they could simply use AI!' that Tumblr likes to strawman them as #Lots of 'So I did the base with AI and then painted over it manually in Photoshop' and 'I trained this model myself with my own drawings' #And I'm not saying there aren't some guys that are being assholes over it on Twitter #But when you go to an actual community dedicated to it. Honestly these guys are rather nice #I've seen some truly astounding projects #like there was this guy that was using people's scars to create maps of forests and mointains to sort of explore the theme of healing #And this one that took videos of his city and overlayed them with some solarpunk kind of thing #And this one that was doing a collection of dreams that was half AI amd half traditional painting #Anyway the point is you guys are being way too mean to a group of people that genuinely want to use the technology to create cool art #And while I'm aware there are issues related to its use #it's actually really fucked up you're attacking the individual artists instead of corporations??? #It's as if you were attacking the chocolate guy over the systemic problems related to the chocolate industry! #And also tumblrs always like 'Oh AI is disgusting I hate AI art so I'll just hate in it without dealing with the issue' #While AI art forums often have posts with people discussing how go use it ethically when applied to commercial use!! #Honestly these guys are doing way more about tackling the issue than tumblr and you should feel bad!!!

[twilightarcade]

Opinions and THOUGHTS

like in general or...

Ummm! I don't like crunchy foods that are like. Soft. You know like onions and stuff?? Hate those om a texture basis. Also mushrooms.. don't have too much a problem with the taste but it isn't quite worth the texture. That's not really an opinion more of a preference but I don't really have any ground breaking opinions I think so let's pretend ok

OH um!! Opinion I think 125% zoom shouldn't be the default zoom because that's literally huge which like I know it's different bur I'm special pleadingface the world has to revolve around me. Alsoalso I hate hate hate that TouchPad thing where sometimes if you touch it it'll stay touched except it's so weird!!! Unpredictable n such..

^^^ guy who just got new laptop voice anyway hi future us here this was written like 5 years ago ummmmmmm let's see here

ok you knwo right noow we're laying in bed actually so not many thoughts. Tomorrow is friyay I suppose...... This weeekend though !! Going to be out like all weekend to help some stupid middle schoolers (I LOVE tjem so much) (theyre so tiny.) (some of them are taller than me but we don't talk about that) except like i've been putting off coding this thhimh (TECHNICALLY NOT MY FAULT !! IM NOT UNDER CONTRACT AND HAVENT BEEN ABLE 2 MAKE THE MEETINGS) so im going to need to finish it in like. A day. And sorta pray ....

#askstag #SOSOSO behind on things don't look ........ #anyways also this weekend my mom wanted me to figure out how to make these like granola bar whatever #that are like. 4 dollars each (ABSOLUTELY INSANE !) at this cafe and they're really good allegedly #so i'm gonna figure out how to make them 4 her 👍 #BUT like i never make. Granola bars. So it's gonna be fun. #Ermmm these aren't really thoughts more an account of my life I suppose #It was snowing like? Yesterday. Absolutely huge snowflakes made me so happy #I was TOO tired today apparently and i talked a lot (BAD !!) absolutely horrendous. Not an articulate individual when tired. #it's ok though nothing can damage my upstanding reputation 👊👊 everyone loves me (<- lying) #been really sleepy lately but also havennr really been eating latelyso going 2 try n fix that #ALSO NEED A MUG ! Like i have one except SOMEONE likes to use it all the time (there's several others) #but like. That's the only one that feels nice yk #the design is nice on the eyes AND the shape is really nice. What more do you need in a mug #now i juust need to start drinking coffee or somethibg. Then my hashtag mug liffe will be complete #been sorta mulling over the people in my family as of late and it's really funny. Would share if that wasn't #like. People in my family. Safety or whatever. #it's like if you got a bunch of guys who hated each other and locked them in a room together yk #they would slay in a death game

[aeide-thea]

[witcherposting ahead—nb that this is all totally lighthearted and it's fine if you feel differently!]

anyway what i'd started to say before tumblr ate my post was that like. disclaimer that my approach to netflix witcher canon is that i fully reserve the right to cherrypick, because some of the changes they made were good but others were character assassination, and that obviously i get that if one isn't cherrypicking one does have to actually Grapple With Certain Things 🏔

but like. that said—the more 'Geralt Must Grovel for Weeks and Probably Scourge Himself, Look at What He Did to Poor Sad-Eyed Woobie Jaskier' fics i read the more i'm fucking grateful for the tiny handful where jaskier's just been like, yeah, i never bought that bullshit tbh, he was lashing out and he owes me an apology for sure but a single angry outburst does not in fact scupper an extremely well-established relationship of literally twenty years' standing in one fell swoop???

like i just. idk. imagine remembering that jaskier's a cheery irrepressible little shit and not actually as crushably low on self-esteem as all of us are. of course that would probably require *netflix* to have remembered that, so, you know, no actual shade to anyone who's been projecting that onto him! but just like. idk. they're obviously not siblings but they honestly do have that vibe in certain ways and it's just like. did you never say something overdramatic and shitty in the heat of a fight with yr sibling growing up and then after taking a bit of a breather just like. make a rueful face and apologize for yr respective roles in winding each other up and move tf on, without having, like, a whole extended OTT reparations process where you tell them repeatedly how perfect and sinless they are and how you know you're a miserable worm who doesn't remotely deserve their sunshiny presence in your life but would be so grateful if they could, possibly, somehow, see their way to forgiving you despite yr essential unworthiness—

#anyway. i think there are like. MAYBE like three of you reading this blog who give a shit abt this fandom‚ lol #so i'm mostly just talking out loud to myself here‚ which is fine‚ what's a perblog for if not that #but it's just like. yeah on the one hand you don't just get to yell at people without apologizing at all #on the other hand like. some relationships are strong and elastic enough that one (1) snip is not going to cut them #even a vicious one! #also like. jaskier DID handle that convo clumsily lbr. like. obviously geralt was not Justified but. #if i'd just had a vicious breakup and somebody came bumbling in making loud awkward small talk about it? jesus. #anyway. really ultimately this is just a 'have consumed much too much witcher fic and the Patterns are starting 2 irk me' thing #but it's just like. sometimes things are conflict between two imperfect people #and not a Good Woobie and a Sinful Meanie #anyway. time 2 go reread Sekrit Mutual's fic in which they actually keep in mind the fact that jaskier is a selfish gremlin #who despite himself really does love geralt and as a result is like. constantly torn between his nature and his urge to do right by geralt #but like. fundamentally he's a buffoon and a popinjay who yaps aggressively and then runs back behind geralt's legs #and joey batey leaning into his Soulful and Romantic side (that he does also have) doesn't actually erase that about him‚ nor should it! #anyway. this post is careening all over the place but i think it's just like. exactly the same weird terfish moral binary #that ppl have been talking abt with like. gender and kink and a whole range of things #where like. you always have Victims and Perpetrators #and so jaskier has to be like. the femme bottom victim which makes geralt the macho perpetrator totally undeserving of sympathy #and it's like. actually they're both imperfect people and neither one fits very well into their society's idea of what a man is #and what if we actually examined them as individuals rather than tropes and also remembered yennefer was fierce and interesting #and what if ciri weren't‚ like‚ a manhattan private school girl with her brows done while we were at it #getting a little overambitious with my wishlist there though i know

[areyoudoingthis]

I really don't wanna go to this class today the weather's lovely I'm in a good mood there's even a nice huge tree I could go write under after lunch

#the course has gotten soooooo boring #it keeps making my mood worse #the other day i had to sit through three hours of someone arguing that teachers are individually responsible for righting the wrongs of the #education system #and a couple of fools agreeing with her #i wanna take a nice nap then make an overly sweet caramel latte and go drink it under the giant tree i discovered the other day #maybe work on my poems or read a little #you know what fuck it my mental health isn't well enough to force myself through three hours of sth that will only make me feel way worse #I'll be kind to myself #the course will only give us a useless certificate after all and no one has enough attendance anyway because we're all adults with jobs and #lives and their attendance rules are draconian #from now on I'll only go to the classes that sound fun #earn my presence bitches I'm too cool for your boring selves #alex txt

[zoekrystall]

Saw certain tweets and here once again a reminder which a twt mutual luckily wrote shorter than I could (plus public so I can rb bc no way I do that myself on that site)

Also

And if you want smth I wrote myself which is longer and not just abt that here you go

#a wild lux appears #I think they're one mutual who is fine w being screenshotted ik some don't want that #I wrote that bsky thing while waiting for food. Reg the fellow person I talk abt don't bash ppl that already spoke up and stop for a bit #To rb more later. Or ppl that still go to work bc they can't afford not to bc the thing by these actions is community isn't there as net #Or like anyone that shows they care and didn't do anything harmful and just take recharge time or so #Educate willing(!) ppl nicely and don't bash them or send a internet mob to them etc #The ones posting they still go to/buy boycott stuff yeah they're awful but what does bashing them bring at the end of the day #Don't support those ppl yeah but them posting that shows how much they care for it. They prob just want cloud which you give them. #Pressure ppl in power in a way they can't ignore focus on that not no name individuals #If ppl you know talk in private and if they don't want to change literally just cut them out of your life if possible #Online just block. Don't argue w people that just want to stir smth up etc etc #Also I don't think it's too productive to be mad when a standard user anywhere doesn't share stuff. Like yeah give them info abt that but #some either just do smth offline (in that case maybe tell them in this case just sharing online is also helpful) or are mentally too done #and focus all energy to survive (which is intended by the ppl in power. make ppl so done they only have energy to survive themselves so they #don't have energy to speak up abt problems in the world). Bashing famous ppl is completely different bc backlash actually brings smth there. #More ppl could do more if strike organizations would include community care so more actually could not go to work/shopping #Also reg protests so they should know do you know how many don't watch news anymore (I don't watch tv since many years) #I'm sure some also just can't esp younger ppl if they're parents monitor their socials and are zionists #Ofc speak up. I'm just here to say there are explanations. If they read things and still don't care unfollow/block/mute/idc or if you know #Them talk and explain how if is important they speak up #This has been going on for a good while now idk how many still don't know I am mostly pointing that out for new or not as much shared things #Tho I'm sure many don't know bc the standard response is the gov knows what he does and they do propaganda #They think surely the gov takes care of that. If they shut down convos reg that then that is dangerous denialism and living in escapism n #All. Not if the ppl who follow this need a break w fiction or so. I am sure the ppl you try to reach w bashing already muted/blocked all #accs and words associated w that #Anyways I gotta shower now. Disclaimer my personal opinion be an asshole and it's block on sight yada yada. #I just woke up I'm hungry I need to shower but that is also when I decide to share my pieces so

[visdiefje]

AJR was right. It really doesn't seem like there's anyone for me

#not talking romance even btw. although sure yeah that too. but. #I don't know. 28 years without the kind of friendships where you casually hang out a lot #without a social network that you can see weekly. #it's not that I don't appreciate online and farther away friends. it's not. god knows they are my lifeline #but I can feel my heart growing a little more tired and a little colder every so on #and look. I go to activities and have some groups I genuinely enjoy being in #but it has to be said there are 0 individual bonds with anyone there. I enjoy the environment and physical presence of the group #but I can't call any one individual a friend. and that is hard #I know people say to find activities for shared interests and I'm sure some people find friends that way #and I have fun and new experiences but I don't. make friends. like it just doesn't happen #I don't know. I feel like I might as well wander through life as a ghost. virtually impactless #and it's fine. I'll wander through life. I'll travel to experience temporary kinship. all along I'll feel sorrow at the prospect of leaving #but in the end I will come home to an empty house and that is where one day I will die #it's just how it is. it's how it's always been. at a certain point you can't really ask for that miraculous turnaround in life anymore #nothing is going to magically shift. not when life time and time again grabs you and says this is who I am for you #you can wish and wait and hope and it will never ever be anything but this #bien rambles

[vergina-spva]

Revenge ask!!

NSFW SHIP MEME - LAW X PENGUIN!!! 😈😈

(Send me a ship and I'll tell you.... NSFW edition - still open)

Joke's on you, my multishipper heart ships about everything at least a little 😛

Who is the loudest? 

Penguin. Peng just can't keep his voice down. Law, on the other hand, has alsmost perfect controll over the sounds he makes when he's with Peng.

Who is the more submissive? 

Peng. Although, sometimes, Law likes to be submissive too. Especially when he's been working hard and needs to relax.

Who is more experimental? 

Hmmm I was gonna say Law, but then I changed my mind. Penguin has many things he wants to try, but he doesn't always dare to tell Law about them, so most of it just stays inside his head. While Law would be open to a lot, he's got the things he likes and doesn't feel much need to experiment.

Do they fuck or make love?

Make love. No doubt about it.

Lights on or lights off? 

Off. Just because they don't feel more comfortable with each other that way.

Who likes sexting the most? 

Neither. Maybe Law, but mainly to tease Penguin, nothing serious.

Who is more likely to be caught masturbating? 

Penguin. Law would never let himself be caught.

Who is better at oral and who prefers it? 

Law is better (Law is the master of giving BJs), but Peng likes doing it more.

Who usually initiates things? 

Both? Both. Both is good. But probably Peng a little bit more.

Who has the most/weirdest kinks?

Law. No doubt about it.

#it's hard not to think about this in the way of the fics I'm writing #because thinking of the way I write them in cltcl is a no go #because individually that's possible but together... 😬 NOPE #I mean obviously #I'm really not into incest #yikes yikes yikes #but there's also this Shachi/Law/Peng fic I'm writing and that's different too because Shachi is involved as well #which makes Penguin behave differently #than if it would be just him and Law #and Law would have a completely different kind of relationship with Peng than with Kid and I'm only used to writing him with Kid #so I needed to make a switch in my head for this #also that ShachLawPeng fic is totally platonic all the way... with benefits XD #Anyway I once read a KidKillerLawPeng fic and it was wonderful #sorry this is late btw #I promised I'd do it yesterday and then I didn't (mainly because I needed to edit my chapter) #one piece #ask game #braindeadmaggot