#ig this is anti but i don’t really mean it as an insult

[astrababyy]

i feel like people have vastly different views on azriel as a character. he’s either the quiet, thoughtful character or he’s the emotionally constipated incel with severe anger issues. like (obscure, i know) either a helia from winx or fucking kaleb from credence LMAO. does that make sense? i don’t know how to explain it. he’s either the quiet, supportive, functional member of society or he’s so emotionally constipated that be barely talks and expresses half his emotions through extreme bouts of anger. one is very likable but a little bland, but the other is very ew while also being genuinely interesting.

that being said, he’s probably somewhere in the middle. that, or sjm herself has no idea what he is.

#this post is NOT logical #but that’s all the opinions i have on azriel #he’s such an odd character imo tho #like i can’t place him at all #how can he be so angry all the time and never express it #while also seeming like such an emotionally connected person sometimes #it’s weird idk #i just don’t get him #acotar #azriel #anti azriel #ig this is anti but i don’t really mean it as an insult #i just don’t get his character AT ALL #reading credence right now and kaleb reminds me of what azriel is sometimes?? but not all the time #like idk anymore #astrababyy #what even is this post lmao #not me bringing up acotar winx club AND credence all in one post #like that’s an interesting combination indeed #also do NOT judge me for reading credence #it was popular and i was curious 😭

[sheryl-lee]

You have a lot of opinions for a 18 yr old with no life experience fyi. Just saying, btw who gives a shit if you are bi? Why do you idiots include this in your bio? Antisemite

you know what, i really wasn't going to answer this and i was going to just block you bc normally i simply do not have the time to give trolls like you the satisfaction of a response,,,, BUT i was already having a pretty bad day/week and honestly? you deserve to be told to go. fuck. yourself.

first off - you know nothing about me and assumed i have "no life experience" purely because i am 18 years old. which means nothing. you can be 18 and have multiple jobs, attend college, live on your own and be self-reliant. you know nothing about me, my home life or background, and simply assumed that i have “no life experience” which is honestly an incredibly ignorant perspective to have, fyi. 

and apparently my age also means i am not allowed to have opinions or (gasp!) express those opinions on (*squints*) MY OWN BLOG! so when, exactly, do human beings start having/are “allowed” to start having opinions according to you? because if an 18 year old having individuality and agency in 2022 is groundbreaking to you,,,,, you really should go out more???? people like you who assume age is some kind of indicator of emotional/mental intelligence, maturity and agency just contribute to the problem. 

secondly - who gives a shit if i'm bi? probably no one. but i give a shit about my own identity for reasons that you think i wouldn't have to spell out but you're such a fucking asshole who apparently believes they have somehow earned the right to police people's blogs AND send asks like these for... fun ig? because you have nothing better to do? and btw sending shit like this comes off as incredibly LGBTQ-phobic, but i'm assuming that you don't care bc you genuinely seem like an abhorently bigoted pos

thirdly - why do "idiots" like me include warnings that you shouldn't follow me if you are "lgbtq-phobic, racist, sexist, islamophobic, pro-life/anti-abortion, antisemitic, pro-cop, a trump supporter, a terf/swerf, an antivaxxer, etc (basically if you’re just an awful bigoted person)" ? maybe to stave off idiots like you from following/interacting with me and others who , unlike you, are not awfully bigoted people????

i truly do not comprehend why people like you are so horrible that you feel the need to send unnecessary hate like this instead of, perhaps, going outside, touching grass, and maybe looking in the mirror and pondering why you feel the need to attack strangers on the internet. bc someone like me - who is, according to you, an 18 year old idiot with no life experience - has the common decency to avoid sending anon hate and is aware of the fact that you never know what someone is going through, mentally and physically and emotionally, and that messages like these from people they do not even KNOW can be enough to truly hurt someone and do real damage.

i truly was not going to answer this at all but i am putting it out there so people can understand that sending shit like this is NEVER OKAY. i don't give a fuck what you think about me, or who you are. there is an unfollow/block button for a reason. no one compelled you to send this ask - it was entirely your decision and you did it. but maybe take a step back and consider the fact that you're senselessly hurling insults at someone for.... being themselves? for existing? for having a blog and... having opinions? if you think the internet exists just for you and you alone, then that truly sounds like a you problem.

maybe i’m just being an idiot like you say i am, but idk when i have a bad day i don’t take it out on people, particularly people younger than me, particularly strangers on the internet and particularly when it’s a blatant attack on their sexuality. maybe you should think long and hard about what that says about you before you go around senselessly judging other people who do not know or frankly, care about you and your opinions. i may only be 18, but i am respectful of other human beings, which is evidently more than you can say. i try to be empathetic and i try to go above and beyond the BARE MINIMUM of human decency, which is also more than you can say. and furthermore, i’m proud of who i am after years of self-doubt and i refuse to let someone small and insignificant like you hurt me, especially when it is a completely unwarranted attack and i’m just one of many users on here that you decided simply couldn’t exist without reading your completely backwards assessment of a person based solely on their identity.

so yeah. go fuck yourself.

#the first ask i get in so long and it's this lmao #and normally stuff like this does not get to me but idk #i've kinda been going through it lately and this did hurt me a little #bc im a human being which is apparently groundbreaking new info for some of you #but um whatever i dont care what you guys think abt me #but like??? keep it to yourselves and/or unfollow me lmao #you can leave whenever you want #just dont be an asshole???? #shit like this makes me want to quit tumblr altogether #💌 answered 💌

[yrbutchgf]

what are soft butch and hard femme? i really like the aesthetics but i know that's not what butch/femme is about in its whole so i wonder if those descriptors are made up about looks or if they actually come from the culture and i know that butch/femme isn't a sliding scale of masculinity and femininity but sometimes its hard to feel that i can be femme bc i like alt styles and am not hyperfeminine so the so called hard femme label feels like it fits idk

soft butch is its own can of worms -- suffice it to say many butches, including me, dislike the term soft butch for the implications it casts on butches who don't identify themselves as "soft." there's a LOT to talk about there, though, so honestly i'll save that for another post, if anyone's interested in hearing about it. hard femme, on the other hand, is a different story!

while femme and butch are not solely aesthetic descriptors, sometimes the variants you see of the terms, like hard femme especially, can be very aesthetic-focused, even though they are from the culture themselves! from what i've run into, hard femme is exactly the kind of thing you're describing -- rough and tumble femmes who adopt alt, punkish and gnc fashion and may come off as somewhat of tomboys, but who still base themselves steadfastly in femmeness. i asked about hard femme identity in the butch/femme discord i'm in, and one hard femme, iggy (19, she/he/they), had this to say on the subject:

just note its my personal opinion/the meaning ive found in the term, i havent done a ton of research so its not the objective definition or anything lol.

For me at least its about embracing things that arent traditionally feminine while still keeping ur feminine identity. Not to say other fems have to be traditional/conformist, we're just different types of femininity. So Im not a gentle person, Im not a nurturing person, Im not a soft and tender person. I was a tomboy growing up so what someone said earlier about tomboy fem resonates too. All these things and more Im having trouble describing make me feel like i couldnt traditionally be feminine/a woman. But hard fem feels like it gives me space to be all that and still present and relate to others how I like. Its almost like having a 'butch' personality but preferring fem presentation? Thats the best way i can describe it, like yes theres an aesthetic part but its a reflection of a deeper energy.

I'm not sure about the terms coinage or if theres a more official definition. Afaik it was actually in reaction to soft butch, seeing it as being insulting to other butches and almost making butch more palatable to people outside the community. And we said ok fuck you we're hard fem. I personally think anti-assimilationist politics are another important part of hard femme. It generally refuses to be confined or made to conform.

I have more to say bc its like my whole identity but i gotta get to work so i hope that essay is enough lmfao

he also said that vander von odd often calls themself a hard femme. here's a pic of vampira/maila nurmi, another hard femme, as well as a pic of kay kaos @revoltpunx on ig, which several people in the server identified as a great example of hard femme presentation:

so yeah, hard femme means pretty much exactly what you identified it as :) to me, it sounds like you probably are a hard femme, and if you are, welcome to a long and storied history of kickass femmes that absolutely wreck house!

#asks #anonymous #hard femme #femme tag #gnc tag #gnc femme #tomboy femme

[andie-cake]

Oooo I've got some ideas:

Reverse roles where Paul is the barista and Emmas the CCRP worker and Emma slips him a note asking him out and he gets so flushed up and has a hard time serving her bc he's got a huge crush

Colorado au where the two of them really sit down and appreciate that despite all the shit they went through, they still have each other, so like,,, bittersweet ig

They adopt a cat. Just. That's it. They adopt a cat and I'm somft okay-

Paul has nightmares and Emma comforts him and helps him fall back asleep

Paul and Emma go on that date they were talking about after the helicopter crash

Paulkins proposal

Uhhh ice cream shop date

Beach date

I'm sorry if I've annoyed you I just have a lot of feelings dhdjddjdje

I'm gonna go with the nightmares prompt, bc that's the one my brain latched onto first. Also uh,,, I hope you don't mind that I made it DTfiles related? Consider this a DT Drabble that takes place at some point in between chapters 7 and 9!

"Fucking anti-social shut-in!"

"You selfish, good-for-nothing coward!"

The fight for the Tickle-Me-Wiggly doll raged on, and Paul had no intention of losing it. He needed that doll like he needed air to breathe. Wiggly would bring him happiness. He would bring him love. As long as Paul worshiped his Lord and joined Him in Drowsy Town, Wiggly would show him the light. And the only thing standing in the way of that was Emma, who wanted the doll all to herself.

Paul continued to try and wrestle the Wiggly doll from Emma's iron grip, but she was resilient, pulling and yanking in an attempt to shake off Paul's own grasp. All while they screamed progressively harsher insults at each other. Paul couldn't bring himself to be shaken by any of them. Hurtful words wouldn't matter to him soon, not when he had the essence of Wiggog Y'rath in his hands, and only his hands.

But Paul let his grip loosen too soon, and Emma managed to snatch the doll back from him. Paul watched on in disbelief as Emma cradled the doll in her arms.

"Yes! He's mine!" she exclaimed, her eyes wild and glowing with a pulsing green light. She closed her eyes and pressed her ear to the Wiggly doll's belly- like she was listening for a heartbeat, and began to smooth His ruffled fur down. "He's all mine! I can hear His voice..."

Rage unlike anything Paul had ever known began to course through his veins. No... She couldn't have Him, Wiggly had promised Paul happiness! With an enraged scream, Paul lunged for Emma, grabbing her by the throat and pinning her to the couch. Emma stared on in horror as Paul began to strangle her.

"P-Paul...!" she choked out, struggling beneath him. "Stop...!"

"He's mine, you can't have Him..." Paul hissed, an elated chuckle sneaking into his voice as he watched her squirm. "He's mine, you can't have Him..."

Paul tightened his grip around Emma's throat. Tears began to well up in her wide, panicked eyes. She deserved this... She deserved this for trying to deprive Paul of his master's love... She released her grip on the Wiggly doll, desperately prying at Paul's hands. Paul didn't care that she had let go, he just wanted to see her suffer. It was what his Lord wanted him to do, and he would not disappoint Him. Life began to fade from her eyes.

"Paul... Please..."

~

Emma hadn't been expected to be woken up in the middle of the night by Paul thrashing under the covers in his sleep, muttering nonsense under his breath. She flicked on the light, baffled by what she was seeing. But then she noticed the distress on his face, covered in cold sweat and panting heavily between frantic murmurs. Emma's heart jumped into her throat. He was having a nightmare.

"Paul? Paul!" she exclaimed, trying to jostle Paul awake. "Please wake up, babe..."

With a sharp gasp, Paul's eyes flew open, and he looked around in a panic. It was then Emma realized that it wasn't just sweat pouring down his face, he'd been crying as well. She gently put her hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, hey, you're okay..." she softly assured him as he continued to pant and heave. "It was just a nightmare, hun..."

Paul's tearful eyes met hers. "E-Emma...?"

Emma nodded, offering him a warm, reassuring smile to hopefully calm his nerves. But much to her surprise, Paul threw his arms around her, wrapping her in a bear hug as his body began to shake with sobs.

"You're okay!" he exclaimed, his face buried in the crook of her neck. "Oh god, Emma, I'm so sorry!"

"Whoa, whoa, sorry for what!?" Emma sputtered, horribly lost and confused. "Paul, what happened?"

Paul pulled back from the embrace, gently tilting her chin up. For a moment, Emma thought he was moving to kiss her, but she soon felt his lips gently brush her neck.

"There's no bruises..." he sighed, sounding relieved. "You're not hurt..."

Emma forced herself not to giggle or fidget as Paul carefully kissed over her neck, possibly the gentlest he'd ever been. She had to stay on track.

"Paul, are you okay?" she asked, lifting his head back up so he was looking her in the eyes. Emma's heart sunk. He looked so scared. "What were you dreaming about?"

"It was, um..." he began quietly, looking down at his lap. "Our fight over the Wiggly doll..."

Emma's face fell, immediately understanding what he meant. "Oh god, Paul..." she said, pulling him back into their embrace from earlier. "It's okay, that wasn't us, remember? That was all Wiggly's doing."

"I-I know, but..." Paul sniffled, tearing up again. He sounded so broken. "It went further this time. I dreamt that I killed you over it, Emma..."

"Shh, it's okay, Paul..." she gently shushed him, letting him melt into her embrace. "I know you would never hurt me."

Emma let Paul cry on her shoulder, holding him in her arms and pressing the occasional kiss to his temple. Ever since the fiasco with the Wiggly doll, Paul's been subjected to several nightmares over it, some worse than others. They were usually triggered on nights where he'd heard the Tickle-Me-Wiggly jingle playing at the grocery store or something a few hours prior. Emma was determined to not let Paul beat himself up over the things he'd said while under Wiggly's influence, but these nightmares made it a hell of a lot harder.

Emma laid back in bed, gently easing Paul over so that his head was resting on her stomach. He shut his eyes, clinging to her like a baby koala, and Emma couldn't help but smile a bit. Emma hadn't expected Paul to be much of a cuddler when they first started dating, but she was quick to realize that touch was very much a love language for him. He used to be very shy about physical affection- as though he was embarrassed by it, but he soon became adjusted to regularly giving it to and receiving it from her.

"I love you, Paul," Emma told him, running her fingers through his tousled bedhead. "You know that, right?"

"Mhm, I do," Paul muttered in reply, nestling in closer to her. "And I love you too."

"Get some sleep," she said. "And I'll wake you if you start having nightmares again."

"M'kay. I love you."

"You just said that."

"And I mean it every time."

Emma watched as Paul slowly drifted off, his once-panicked breathing becoming steady. She ran her hand through his hair, savoring the fluff of his bedhead. Occasionally she'd let her hand wander a little further down to gently scratch his back, just to hear him chuckle sleepily as her nails grazed his skin. Once Emma was sure that Paul had fallen back asleep- and he confirmed it by softly snoring against her, she reached over to turn the bedroom lights off once more, and let herself drift off.

#dtfiles #dt drabbles #paulkins

[isitandwonder]

I’ve seen so much shit go down these past few days and I really don’t need stuff  like that at the end of this fucked year. I’ve been talking back and forth with mutuals over the last several days, I’ve seen the mess unfold on Twitter, people came to my inbox to ask what was happening.

Yet I didn’t want to give this unsubstantiated, rather silly and exaggerated accusations room on my blog. I hoped it would die down. I’m also only lurking on Twitter and IG and would never get involved with fandom there cause those sites stress me out.

This whole mess also made me enormously angry so I needed time to calm down.

Now I only like to say a few things and then I hope I can be done with this.

I think this whole shit show is a perfect example for the dark side of social media, how things get inflated, facts messed up and allegations thrown around. It shows that for a lot of people it’s all about performative behavior. I doubt these accusations would’ve been aired if it had been John Smith from next door who behaved badly. I’m also shocked by a culture that completely disregards facts and proof and judges entirely emotional. Where’s your brain, people?

Of course, you never know with celebs, but the balance of probability still applies to them as well. Someone against no other complains have ever surfaced, who loves his mum and sis, talks very respectful of female colleagues and even donated his salary to an anti-sexual violence charity must truly be rather cunning to be a secret abuser.

When there are allegations of sexual misconduct, you should believe the ‘victim’. Okay, I’m totally with that. But that ‘victim’ doesn’t have to give you any proof for anything they accuse another person off, probably destroying their livelyhood with just a few words? Not even a coherent account of what they’re accusing someone off? Like, what the fuck??? Are people out of their minds?

If you choose to go public with heavy allegations, of course you have to give some facts of what happened to you. Not sordid details but facts that can confirm and explain what you’re hinting at. Like a date, proof you were where you said you were, or a general outline of what happened so other people can comprehed and consider if your allegations are believable. Because we’re all aware of false allegations esp against celebs. We’re also all aware that this is usually no fun for the alleged ‘victim’. So it’s for their own safety and integrity that they have to share some facts. Esp in a case where the allegations started vague with ‘bad experience’, then morphed into ‘sexual assault’, to end up as ‘harassment’ or ‘attempted sexual misconduct’. If you accuse someone of these offences you have to give at least some facts as to what transpired. Otherwise those big words are baseless which doesn’t mean they won’t do harm to both the accuser and the accused.

I believe a ‘victim’ if they have some sort of proof for what they say they were subjected to or can at least give a consistent account of what happened. To describe yourself as a ‘victim’, something objectively harming has had to have happened to you. Sorry, but otherwise it all frays out into a subjective feeling of discomfort, which then is on you and on no one else.

Without some details, simply nothing happened and all this is a storm in a tea cup.

No one forced the people who brought these allegations up to post on social media. They said nothing physical happened and they don’t want to press charges. Why did they even post it then? To warn other women? But to warn someone you have to tell them what you’re warning them about. Did they want to cut Tim down a nodge? Did they want attention and clout? Were they still angry and just wanted to vent? Whatever, social media is not the best place to work through trauma. Get a therapist or a councelor or a lawyer. But just putting unsubstantiated accusations out there is the worst way for everyone involved.

There is no proof this person ever even met Tim. There is no proof anything happened between them. Not that I don’t believe them that he acted like a douche, but if it’s just their word and no proof for anything or details are needed even I could claim the same this woman does (and I have proof I ‘met’ him twice). So you see where this ‘believe the victim’ leads us. Nowhere. The ‘victim’ has at least to proof that there was possible victimisation.

I get it, the girl who met Tim presumably at a party during HSN filming had experienced some form of sexual abuse in high school (her post from 2018 was not about any celebrity afaik but about a guy she went to high school with. I’ve also never seen proof that she accused any other celeb. This was Twitter running amok imo). As nothing physical happened between her and Tim, I assume he said something to her that made her uncomfortable.

He was 19, maybe drunk/high. She was a bit older. He chatted her up, she said no. He backed off but might have said something nasty.

I’m not denying this could’ve happened. But that is life, not assault. It can make you angry and you might post about this incident to show he’s a douche. But label this sexual assault or sexual misconduct? We don’t live in a perfect world. She didn’t feel threatened or violated, just uncomfortable. But of course sexual assault gives you more clout than telling the story of a 19yo wannabe Hollywood star hitting on you and then getting pissy when you turned him down. I mean, water is wet, right? But assault? Misconduct? Harassment? Now you’re talking...

Maybe the incident was more traumatizing to her than it would have been to other people because of her previous experience in high school. We don’t know. As she doesn’t say what happened, we can’t make up our minds. Which doesn’t stop people from throwing all kinds of shit around.

But, please, a guy saying some shit to you isn’t the same as a guy raping you. Is there no awareness of nuance anymore? Have you all gone mad? Yes, trauma differs for everyone, but come on. Men shouldn’t behave vile against women, but there’s still a difference between verbal insults and physical assault. Nobody is perfect and those without sin cast the first stone.

I’m sure this wasn’t Tim’s finest hour. If she’d just said what happened we could all have handled this better.

But Tim’s not a Kevin Spacey ffs.

I know we’re all bored out of our minds. But can we please keep a sense of proportion here? Stop leveling everything to look woke. It’s insulting to real survivors.

Tim is not a predatory rapist and that woman is not a pathological liar out to destroy celebs. The truth lies in between and for sure is much more pathetic, petty and boring.

#timothee chalamet #the current mess #tw assault

[essercipertuttienonperse]

Hi Em, don't post this if u r uncomfortable but I m struggling with my feelings towards larry. I feel they might b together and I really really love louis, I want to support him, I adore him but I feel a residual resentment towards H, not sure why.. may b coz his image gets to me n I feel this is who he is and whoever is defending him r basically thinking him as of 16yrs old child.i can't compartmentalize my feelings n I don't hate him but its just seems very odd larry belief relationship+2

+2 I know if I ask anywhere I will be termed as rad and will be insulted but I joined fandom recently , not on Twitter or Ig or tiktok.. just follows tumblr accs. I feel most of the times larries make hl relationship based on what they witnessed in early years, everything is still fairytale behind closed doors and H is still the most supportive, loving,loyal etc. to louis. But I can't really believe it, I know u don't address larry much in ur acc, may b just wanted a level headed ans but thanks

heyy💞💞 don't worry it doesn't make me uncomfortable at all, I'm happy to answer :')

so first of all welcome to the Fandom :D😘 I see that you've already encountered all the sides djgjhh so what I got from your message is that I think you came into the fandom through Larry and now you're kind of struggling about where your place is because you're not sure where u stand on that topic right? I hope I didn't misunderstand you!

So my advice is honestly to just look for people that you like following/you like their posts and their takes etc etc rather than finding a "side" or a "label" (larrie, rad, anti etc) personally I've found that "picking a side" often doesn't end well and for me personally it was just annoying because then I felt like I had to adhere to everything that side said, so what I did and do is just try to find people that I like, that I think are really nice people in general regardless of Fandom and just stick with them! i found that none of the sides of Fandom are monoliths and there's a variety of opinions everywhere so sometimes I end up agreeing/disagreeing with larrie mutuals and sometimes with louies or others etc etc it all depends on following the right people for you imo! and I think this way of navigating Fandom is also a lot less stressful for me. also you said you love Louis but you're not a fan of Harry but from your ask I got that you prefer the larrie part of fandom rather than like.. people who think Louis is straight? which is understandable! and again just bc you don't think they're together now it doesn't mean, at least imo, that you can't stay in this little corner of the internet! I think you totally can stay here and interact with the content that's being made, and I think you can also interact with the people! if someone is a nice person with a brain Im sure they won't care about it tbh!

Also you said you want to support Louis but are not sure about H? I mean that's not a problem honestly, you don't have to support everyone who is near Louis! like you can be a Louie and not care about Eleanor, lottie, Harry, Liam, Niall etc! there's no contract or obligations! and if you don't like seeing someone in your dash you can filter their name and Tumblr won't show you the posts! (most of the time)

so yeah in conclusion my advice is to just curate your fandom environment and try and find people who make your time here more enjoyable! 😊💞 and remember that you don't have to like or believe in anything! if you like Louis then you're a Louie! simple as that :)

#I hope this helped and made sense a little dihkj #ask #anon #😘😘 #Also I hope this is what you wanted from my answer? #sorry if I didn't get it right :(( feel free to send another ask!

[nancylou444]

I forgot if i sent it to u or someone else so i'm sending it again anyway

Please Read this to the end and then judge me.

I do not understand at all why you and all other anti destiels dont ship destiel and think that dean is straight and i hate you for that from the bottom of my heart. i mean cant you see how dean truely loves cas and gives no shit about Sam, his brother?and also jensen and writers ship it.

You are so stupid and do not deserve to live in this world period

Read this list below.it may help you take off your anti destiel colored glasses and Accept the truth:which in fact is that Destiel Will become canon.

Reasons Why Destiel Will Definitely Become Canon Before The Show Ends 101:

1.Jensen Ackles: Destiel Doesn't Exist.

2.Jensen Ackles: Because Dean is a lover of the LADIES.

3.Dean will always choose SAM over anyone else.

4.SAM and Dean are soulmates.

5.Castiel: you chose EACHOTHER.

6.Jensen Ackles' Unscripted Frustrated look into the camera in "Fan Fiction" episode.wink wink

7.Jensen Ackles: there wasn't a whole lot of dean and cas storylines in season 9.personally,i kind of enjoyed that.

8.Jensen Ackles: i think the whole dean and cas thing has gotten a little out of proportion.

9.Jensen Ackles: "destiel is real" is it?? Where?? Where is it real??

10.Jensen Ackles: What? What castiel? Nah just me and my pies!

11.Jensen Ackles: We sit down with the writers in a couple weeks. It boils down to these two brothers, that’s the core and the heart of the show, their journey, their fight for each other.

12. “You are homophobic if you don’t ship destiel!"

13.Dean Winchester is fuckin Straight.

14.Eric Kripke : I'm just really interested in guys, STRAIGHT guys who have a tight friendship,they are really fun to write...

15.Dean Winchester: I'm Dean winchester.i enjoy sunsets,long walks on the bitch and frisky WOMEN.

16.Dean Winchester : I dont swing that way.sorry.

17.Dean winchester : yeah sorry again pal i dont play for your team.

18.Dean sold his soul for SAM.

19.Dean died so that he could meet with Death and get SAM’s soul back which of course Castiel left in hell.

20.Dean gave away the Impala and was willing to die with a Croatoan infected SAM.

21.Dean breathed in the poisonous smoke, so that he would die with SAM.

22.Dean wanted out of an AU with Mary and Jessica alive, because AU!SAM didn’t like Dean that much.

23.SAM and Dean made promise to each other, made vows to each other really, in a church.

24.SAM and Dean choose each other over the world, anything, and everything, EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

25. Dean refers to SAM as though HE is his spouse (”does he want a divorce?”, “Lucy”...)

26.Dean would rather live in a world WITH demons than live in a world WITHOUT SAM.

27.When Dean forgot everything else, including his own name, he still remembered SAM.

28.Dean : I can’t do it without my brother, I don’t want to 

29.Dean to Sam :You’re the ONLY one who could’ve talked me out of it 

30.Dean to Sam :There ain’t no me if there ain’t no YOU.

31.Dean to Sam :“Because whatever we have between us, love, family, whatever this is, they’re always going to us it against us.”

32.Dean to Sam: “You’re my weak spot SAMMY, and I’m yours”

33.Dean or Sam i dont remember: “All that matters now, all that’s ever mattered, is that we’re together.“

34. Dean to Sam :“Don’t you dare think that there is anything, past or present, that I would put in front of you!“

35.Dean to Sam : “I made you a promise in that church, you and me, come whatever!”

36.The canon friendship between Dean and Castiel is toxic and borderline-abusive, full of lies, threats, insults, abandonment, beatings, and betrayals.

37. Sam, possessed by the devil himself, took control of his own body and beat Lucifer because Dean was there, because Dean didn’t give up even though he was hurt and covered in blood, because seeing Dean bombarded Sam with the memories of their life together.

38. Dean didn’t leave SAM’s bedside , didn’t bury him, didn’t burn his body, didn’t want to say goodbye, and how later he didn’t hesitate to sell his soul.

39.Dean decided not to go into a box, because SAM asked him not to.

40.SAM and Dean were the ones whom were mistaken with gay couple by several people if that matters.

41.SAM to Dean :“you always put me first. Your whole life”,

42.Dean to SAM: “I know where I am at my best, and that is right here, driving down crazy street next to you”,

43.Sam or Dean i dont remember:“you know what brought me back? You did”.

44.Dean’s siren-as admitted by the siren herself-was a copy of SAM.

45.Dean told a male cop "you're awsome".OMG!! He is bi!!!

46.Dean fanboyed over a male tv character.Holy Chuck!! He is bi!!

47.Jensen or Jared:“At its core, it’s the story of two brothers.”

48.Jensen or Jared:“At the end of the day, this starts and stops with the brothers.”

49.Jensen or Jared:“When it comes down to it, it’s about these two brothers.”

50.Dean told Castiel to get the hell outta bunker for SAM while he knew he didnt have his angel powers.Damn! Dean truely loves Cas!

51.Dean figured Castiel was too far gone to be convinced back into their group and bound Death to do their bidding. Dean’s order to Death was to kill Castiel where he stood.#couplegoals

52.Castiel blackmailed Dean by torturing SAM.oh dear god!!! What a True Lover!!

53.Castiel Betrayed sam amd DEAN with crowley.but that's what all lovers do Right???

54.This isnt some romantic show.

55. Castiel is a genderless celestial wavelength of light wearing a male vessel.

56.Dean's chemistry with Baby the Impala is far more noticable than the one with Castiel.

57.Sam even once asked Dean and Baby the impala to get a room.

58.The possibility of Dean and Baby the impala to get sexually involved and the two of them having sex in the finale full frontal is far more than the possibility of non existant Destiel to become canon.

59.Destiel shippers are only a tiny minority of the SPN fandom.

60.Jensen Ackles is fucking done with this shit.

61.Dean left Ben and Lisa for SAM.

62.Misha Collins is the only one who queerbaits.

63.Dean in "red meat" described SAM as the man he loved.

64.Dean sang in a colorful background.OMFG!! he is bi!!

65.Jesen ackles : because being with his BROTHER and doing that is the happiest he is.

66.Dean to SAM: "because i couldnt live with you dead"

67.What show you've been watching???

68.Jared : because that would have RUINED the show to make it about something it wasnt about.

69.Dean has kissed and had sex with an angel.her name was Anna

70.Sera Gamble said “supernatural is the epic love story of SAM and dean”

71.Cw_supernatural IG: it has always been two brothers and the open road.

.

.

.

*Manic laughter*

*Aggressively drop the mic*

*The door is over there*

*Boom! Suck it*

*It sucks to be destieheller*

You are very welcome

Btw I'm a Proud anti destiew and a logical SPN fan.

If You think I'm right,then Chuck bless your logical souls and if not,let me find some fucks to give....sorry,none was found.

The begining part was an example of a savage destieheller.it wasn't me😊ignore it.

Yours truly,anon.

=============================

Holy crap, that is one longass ask. An ask I was thisclose to deleting until I skipped to the bottom. 

💖💖💖💖💖

#i love my anons #destiehellers #destiew #dean is as straight in november 2020 as he was in september 2005 #jensen does not like destiel shit #Anonymous

[kuroopaisen]

not to throw my two cents /now/ but for shows like aot (I personally stopped after s2 and i havent rly considered picking it up again yet), there definitely are problematic elements and depictions that should be called out when necessary—and we need to especially listen to those whose identities were unfairly treated. anime and manga aren’t innocent of problems, as are the artists behind it :,)

I won’t lie, japan still continues to be sketchy w how they teach and treat their history, but ig we as watchers/readers these media can remain critical of what we consume ? the act of watching smth w fascist elements doesn’t mean you condone it ! and choosing not to watch or support (i find these to be different things) bc of those problematic elements is also valid.

oH and I personally don’t rly like aot either from what I’ve been seeing LMAO as a person who dedicated 2 years of high school to extensive studying of history it’s just :\\\\\\ I think all the points have been made by ppl before me, and by you!! 

hello miss yuki!! first of all, i think the idea that people can’t consume Problematic Media is. is stupid because. humans are capable of critical thinking DJLSDALKJ that’s like... our thing. and just because something’s ‘problematic’ doesn’t mean there’s nothing valuable to draw from it? and by that, i mean... sometimes i specifically seek out things i know i’ll disagree with so i can actually talk about it properly, instead of relying on heresay. 

i guess it’s like the jk r*wling thing. do i think people who enjoy harry potter are militant transphobes? no! do i think it’s a bit shifty to spend money on harry potter merch that isn’t secondhand and is therefore putting coins in miss transphobes pockets? yes! there’s difference between consuming and supporting for sure. 

people have complicated relationships with media and internet discourse tends to make things too black-and-white. where do we draw the line? does resonating with shinji’s story in neon genesis evangelion mean you now support sexualising underage girls? does enjoying harry potter mean you condone fatphobia? does enjoying my hero academia mean you hate the lower classes? 

but at the same time, if someone wants to steer clear of something because of those kinds of things, they absolutely have a right to and neither them nor their intelligence should be insulted for that. a lot of people like to throw around “oh you just don’t understand” as an insult and honestly, Shut Up. leave people be.

ANYWAY aot 

yeah a lot of my problems with aot come down to isayama using a metaphor that isn’t even his to draw on. even if the pernicious aspects are unintentional, they’re still harmful. and also, it’s pretty obvious that isayama’s done his research? with how well the story emulates certain facts in history (and even referencing the madagascar plan hh), there’s no way isayama doesn’t know what he’s talking about. and you can’t really brush up on your knowledge of wwii without the whole antisemitism thing, so... 

but i think an issue i have with a lot of the criticism towards aot is that it comes from a very Western perspective; and i get that to a degree, but it’s also important to think about where the author comes from and who he’s writing for. that doesn’t exonerate any of the problematic aspects to any degree, but context is. well, sometimes it’s everything 

for example, i don’t think the question is so much “is isayama a nazi” as it is “is isayama trying to justify japanese expansionism” because while both are awful, one question is more relevant to what he’s likely to believe (even in the infamous twitter screenshots, he pretty staunchly seems anti-holocaust). i think ethnocentric criticisms muddy the water. 

i’m a dual major in anthropology and history, and while that absolutely doesn’t give me authority, it means i tend to focus more on this sort of thing? there’s no way isayama could’ve known that attack on titan would become so... global? and an issue with episodic things of any nature is that it’s almost impossible to analyse them in their whole until it’s finished. aaaand in most cases, that takes years.

so regardless of what isayama intended, that means there are still right-wing groups that love aot and see it as a metaphor for the great replacement, or there’s people who see it as a justification to abandon pacifism, and so on. but there are also people who see it as a staunchly anti-war story, or a narrative about the cycle of hatred. 

YEAH w the watching vs. supporting, i’ve actually been streaming aot on gogoanime because i didn’t know what i’d think of it when i started, even though i have an animelab and crunchyroll subscription. the question is, am i giving it social capital by discussing it online? some would say yes (i’ve got a platform, and just talking about it in general gives it affluence), some would say no (even if i have a platform, it’s small in the grand scheme of things, and how many people are actually reading my mini essays?)

ANYWAY this is largely incoherent i’m so sorry sdalkjfslfkdj look after yourself!!  

#I'M SO SORRY THIS GOT LONG #yuki 🌸 #rowan watches attack on titan #awanggan #rowan replies

[lightshielded]

spoilers and very VERY long, so below cut. 

tl;dr - jarv is a character going through a lot of emotional turmoil caused by the lose of trust in close friends, lose of his family to the very magic they were working to promote ( suggesting to him it was the wrong idea to promote it ), having little healthy support network, and around him is a game of politics where those older and more experienced on the council are influencing him heavily in his altered state of mind. however, he is still a character who cares for his people, wanting to protect his people from future catastrophes cause by magic but also knowing they aren’t all bad so is also shown tentatively reaching out to foreign advisers of allied nations which have advised his father in the past on the subject of magic and is trying to do his best despite being king far younger than anyone should and thrown into the position in a truly horrific way.

important - all is subject to change as we are provided more info, this is just a pouring out of my first impressions and my attempt to understand and rationalise everything under the current state and info provided. also important to note, this includes mentions of suicidal tendencies, depression, ptsd and other like matters. please read with caution.

so as you may know ( or don’t and do not care about spoilers ) our dear prince, or rather king now, has had a very bad day. like he was almost made to eat a rat, and marvel didn’t want to draw him in his actual armour and did in the ceremonial / ig armour instead so i got big cucked out of my hopes and dreams, he got hit with a morg ult when trying to gank mid lane . . . oh and the mid laner killed his dad. what a wonderful day for our dear prince, i mean king.

so a couple things that are unrelated to what i am about to talk about but things that are true in my mind. riot removed jarv’s capture and torture by noxus just so they could have sy/las say he has no idea what he has experienced. just saying. 8 years of basically the exact same lore only to have one of his key points removed at the addition of the character? who then mocks him for it? just saying it’s true. tho i personally still go by that he was capture on my own blog and all, but i have cracked riot’s code.

also like where was shy? i think jarv kinda mentions her but like she is his bodyguard. that’s her whole thing. where is she? i get she tries to lay low but she is meant to be on jarv’s personal guard, but she wasn’t there. now i have a short theory on this. for those who don’t know, shyv is genetically a dragon, her real magic is the fire rune inside her. but otherwise she is a dragon that some how fucked up and became a human ( prior to sy/las it was caused by magic so the magic is technically making her human not a human becoming a dragon and after sy/las the shitty lore we don’t like is that it is the weather ). 

so my theory is, since her dragon - ness isn’t magic but is like genetics, she would just eat him and he actually can’t use it against her so they had to remove her. some how. cause plot. and jarv is mopey that she isn’t around, for a reason they wont say :///// that or riot doesn’t care about her or forgot she existed :)))))))

so the actual things i wanted to talk about, jarv’s very harsh language and actions in the comic and short story. they seem so violent from what we know of the prince of the past. and while that might be true i would like to point out a couple things about jarv as a whole before we begin:

jarv was never brought up to fear or dislike mages - ( though would have heard stories i imagine ) which is evident in his father’s own opinions and his lore. this makes his point of view here seem obscure, he seems to hate very strongly despite not doing so before. this is true, but i believe i can provide some enlightenment on this. something similar to this has happened in his lore before. his first conflict with noxus he was introduced the harshest realities of war, it is the innocents that die first. in both new canon lores ( prior and post syl/as changes ) it is stated there were only a handful of survivors out of dozens of towns. it is said what he saw deeply affected him. the carnage there so deeply troubled him and he could not forget the faces of the dead. the atrocities he witnessed were far greater than he had anticipated and it left him very shaken and unable to correctly reason. this caused him to ignore all rational plotting and sense, pushing away all his advisers’ ideas, wanting nothing more the avenge those who died. and this ends badly for him. like jarv really, really loves his people and would do anything to keep them safe. in fact, it is known from other stories jarv doesn’t ask of his soldiers to do anything dangerous he himself isn’t doing. if they must face the risk of death he will do so too. and he has earned himself a lot of respect for that. so we know, jarv is deeply affected by his people’s deaths and is not unknown to react mindlessly out of rage when they are hurt, and thinking the ‘villain’ need to be punished.

our now king is younger than you all probably think - if you take demacia’s lore and the dates / ages we are given, he is quite young. low 20s with a max of about 25 but even that is generous. it is noted he doesn’t know what to do, his mood fluctuating like rising and falling flames, his lore says he needs to be ready but not that he is. this is not to say he is incompetent or emotional because of he age, but with age comes experience that he has not had the chance to garner yet. he is not ready yet in his own opinion and i would agree as well.

jarv loves his family, a lot - and his only family was his father and xin. i think it is important to note, jarv has a lot of love for his family for they are the only people that really see him as a person. his closest friend even had to be reminded to call him by name. so to lose the closest people to you hurts man. his dad just died. okay.

jarv’s part in turmoil - there is actually a story which occurs after the time frame of the lu/x comic ( unless they are going to say the events of the last volume cover a full month? ) which has some interesting links and i’ll summarise all that with my conclusions at the end.

so. onto the main part. why has our fair king turned from someone who sees ‘ the true strength of the Demacian people—standing together as one in defense of their homeland, no matter their differences or misgivings. ’ to ‘ Mages? . . . We should have executed them all. ’ it is shocking. even xin is shocked by how much he has seemingly flipped noting, ‘ Indeed, he knew the prince had always been troubled by Demacia’s treatment of its mages. But that was before. ’ note, xin is saying he was troubled once and these anti - magic outbursts are new. though, i will like to point out, i don’t think the outbursts in the short story or the comic are particularly anti - magic as they are anti - syl/as and anti - murderous rebellion. so from now on, i am going to work through the sections of the comic and then the short story and kind of evaluate jarv’s thoughts and feelings and what i think is happening with him. wow, i hope you like your posts long. ( oh, and i recommend turning the pages along with me since i will not be posting pictures unless it is very important to save on length )

so to begin, we first see jarv at a meeting with a mage - seeker, some council members and his father, reacting to what happened several hours ago. honestly here he is as normal, he is thinking first and foremost for the people and with a very strategical focus to his thoughts. he is trying to both reassure his own father while working to capture the murderers. truly nothing remarkable other than him being a little taken aback by his father chiding him. i can talk a long time how jarv was brought up with very zealot ideas despite the king’s best intentions but that is not for now.

next page is mostly focused on the riots outside but does show jarv’s priorities. protect my father, fight for my people. heck this is even brought up in his ( now very outdated ) voice lines ‘ for my father, the king. ’ ‘ protect the faithful. ’ also cue me getting excited they would show jarv’s actual combat armour since they have the guards all in that good shit but nah they didn’t and i am big sad. i get they set all the demacian champs to their in game stuff ( and for jarv that’s the for show / ceremonial armour ) rather than their lore stuff for accessibility but still i am sad.

and now we get to the fun stuff. wow look at jarv straight beating the shit out of people. legit knocking several people down, making someone into a kebab. the come at me stance. that face he makes when sy/las calls him princeling. so many people call him that in lore. is it even a unique insult at this point? get new material you chain gremlin you.

in the next page we do see him angry tho, at first he is controlled and stoic with his speak, not too many emotions showing on his face. but it is when he puts a threat on his father do we see his brows furrow and leave him quite angry in the last panel of this page. tho, while obvious mad at the threat on the king he is actually keeping his cool. rational thought based on what he knows of the magic syl/as has. but he is a bit ticked off. ( OH ALSO THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART DON’T @ ME BUT JARV IS TALLER THAN SY/LAS WHILE BENDING DOWN AND IN A FIGHTING STANCE AND SY/LAS IS UPRIGHT BY LIKE AN INCH. HE IS PROBABLY SEVERAL INCHES TALLER UPRIGHT. I STAN THIS TALL MAN. )

so the next page is very interesting, we see syl/as talk of ancient and powerful struggles then conjure fire from the pillars. so as far as i am aware this is meant to be a reference to our favourite angels but i am trying to work out when this would have been. i thought they fought in a small town which was all but destroyed and not in the capital city. it is possible that the petricite keystones were at the town and those keystones moved to where the capital would be considering their reverence of kay/le and stuff but idk. super cool tho! it might be explained in the future, or not but i think what i have there is the most rational ( or maybe they mean like various conflicts involving them but not them against each other ??). anyway, we also see jarv getting madder obvious from the last page and then the language he uses, gone from the neutral ‘ mage ‘ to negative terms such as ‘ thugs ’. so the fire heavily wounds or kills the guards and jarv jumps head long into the flames.

the next page continues with their fight which is frankly brutal but they really skimped on detail here. it is shown that jarv cut syl/as in the chest and stuff but 1) no blood and 2) it is no where to be seen later in the comic which is unfortunate. would have been cool. other things which is cool, jarv pinwheeling kay/le’s fire away. i love the dumb ways jarv is shown to use his lance in various media, just spectacular. but yeah, syl/as going for blows in calling him ignorant about the heritage he loves. cause we know how much our man loves demacia. but i think he is trying to goad him. like i said before, jarv wears his heart on his sleeve a lot. he is an emotional man, but emotions can make you sloppy.

so on the next page, we see morg’s magic and again i love this touch but who really knows how it is there. so jarv is taken down by that which is interesting because it affected him a lot more than kay/le’s? i have theories about the magics and how they affect people based on their judgements but again that’s for discussion for another post. so with the guards taken down and then their prince, syl/as finds himself victorious.

so skipping through gar/en’s bit, we next see jarv tied up and being walked ahead of some of the mages. notably he isn’t wearing his crown helm. but also, he is very calm. jarv doesn’t really fear his own death much, he has faced dying before and to him it is simply a risk a soldier faces. so he is rather calm on the walk while syl/as threatens him. though, likely also subdued by the magic from before. but he is also talking a lot of sense, this does end badly, really sy/las doesn’t get what he wants out of this venture, not really. sylas however thinks this funny and mocks him about eating rats ( which honestly i question what he actually ate because 1) idk about you but i didn’t see rats in these panels of his cell and 2) he looks very fit and healthy for a man who eats rats. personally i think they feed the prisoners but since their magic is being sapped constantly by the petricite that they likely get hungrier faster, like they are constantly exercising, and so he ate rats. but also again, lets be real, they removed jarv being tortured so he couldn’t reply ‘ well no, but i survived being tortured by noxus. i have eaten much worse. ’ ( also syl/as uses incorrect style of address here which is either an accident or an interesting hint to the next page - majesty is for kings, highness for princes ) anyway, he drags the prone jarv to the door and...

surprise. the king is already dead by the time they get there. now jarv is obviously shocked and horrified and sy/las is too but i think that is because someone is stealing his thunder and hello his plans aren’t going to plan. this is when things start going down hill for jarv’s mental state. before he was mad but controlled, jarv’s expression on this page are wild eyed. and very much lacking of any confidence he had prior. for once, the prince looks as young as he actually is, rather than acting a stoic faced prince.

now the next page is actually the one i think the artists drew the best for jarv. i really love his eyes in the first panel. jarv’s hunched posture, the looking over his shoulder and upwards, got to say i love the composition. also i didn’t mention it yet but jarv and syl/as’hair almost look the same and idk if that is intentional but i like the idea that it might have been cause it makes our fair prince look very rugged and references his position as a prisoner. anyway. but just jarv’s silence in the last panel, before he was confident and speaking and now his words are trailing off and he has nothing to say. he lost his family and the idea of mages being monsters comes to his mind here. ( also note, while i have cut this out of the image, when syl/as is asking about who killed the king the mages say it wasn’t them but possibly another mage that came with them. this is probably true since it is anarchy at the moment but also there is no blood so unlikely to have been caused by a weapon and poison doesn’t make sense since the guards were dead too. )

but that isn’t the end of it, that is for sure. syl/as lost the king to his own anarchy so he needs a new star of his show. and so jarv continues to have a bad time. he is dragged from his grieving and through the citadel ( and past some really fucked up and burnt bodies wow trying to give jarv flash backs are you? ) and here jarv is starting to have doubts about his father and his own views. ‘ my father was wrong about your kind. he thought he could make peace with you. and you murdered him. ’ jarv puts the barrier between his people and mages at this point, condemning any thought which would have allowed this as wrong. now syl/as then insists that the king could have changed this at any time but we also know the council of demacia is quite powerful itself and the king leaves it to a more democratic style of coming to decisions together and actually regrets letting them have so much power. and jarv is marched outside to be made an example of and executed.

passing over ‘lu/x being a bad ass part one’, we return to jarv being cuffed to this really fancy chair. i like it, but also how extra can you be sy/las. anyway, as this page goes on we can really see the prince’s loss of confidence and despairing states. he starts strong when syl/as claims he has been complacent on things ( finally confirmation that he hasn’t cause riot wont tell me anything !!!! ) and he denies that neither he or his father have, and syl/as knows nothing about either of them. but his words trail off, he is stuttering through his words, head bowed, skin clammy. 

what he is talking about is 1) his backstory where he fought noxian invaders of demacia’s outer borders and allied lands, 2) meeting with exiles and we know in demacia their exiles tend to be mages as magic use is given imprisonment or exile - this quite happily aligns with my own head canons that he meets with them to help provide safe passage and resources similar to j3 to the noxians in his and xin’s story - 3) now we can assume he is talking about the same person from before in the earlier comic but he is really dodging around a name. i’m inclined to think shyv right now based on the ‘not so different’ so implying similar but not mage but magical creature. but really we don’t know. though that’s cute. but syl/as simply laughs this off, deeming any effort they have made and mocking his relationship. anyway, jarv just looks really sad and upset man.

and so the next page goes on and sy/las is calling for the crowds opinion on if he should be executed. some ( likely the rebels ) say yes and some ( likely town folk ) say no and beg for someone to save him. syl/as of course listens to his own people only and takes execute as the option, and starts firing up the mages on that. some call for him to be bled ( oh i see this is where they wanted to put the noxian blood letting torture. they got rid of it to be put here i see. ) and another to behead him. and up until the end, jarv simply seems like he is simply given in, accepted his death. eyes closed and almost willing it over. he has already had to deal with one drawn out (near) death before, he doesn’t particularly want another. he only seems perturbed when syl/as tries to force him to eat a rat before he dies. again he is wide eyed, and very disgusted by the prospect. 

he is already in a state where his father has been murdered, he has been pulled away from him and forced to march past the magic warped remains of his people both soldiers, councillors and innocents, his death is being made into a sceptical and now he is also being humiliated. also important to note is that he is alone in all of this, his uncle is nowhere to be found, his father is dead, when forced into an arranged marriage with someone he considered a trusted friend he was given no answer but abandonment, and his two friends are no where to be seen. that mixed with the people he loves so dearly gathered to watch him die and some even calling for his death. he is hurting really badly, and if he didn’t want to be sick at the sight of burnt bodies he now wants to be sick at the thought of eating a live rat. 

and now we have ‘lu/x being bad ass part two’ and ga/ren rushes in to save them both. the comic doesn’t say and what exactly happens next is likely a flash back at the start of the next comic as i believe the next comic occurs after the short story, as it was released now and not then. but i imagine two things occur in jarv’s mind during this event of him being saved ( which he know he is ). 1) gar/en is right. he can always trust ga/ren. we know his friend is vocal in his dislike of magic and belief in the laws in place, so jarv after these events probably takes to leaning on this view point as it comes from on of the only people he has left and feels safe with him after all he has gone through. 

2) can lu/x really be trusted? jarv isn’t blind nor deaf. he heard syl/as and lux talk about them used to being friends, and that he used her to kill people. he doesn’t know about her magic i don’t think, but could clue it out from that maybe, and it is unsure if he knows her involvement with syl/as but he now knows she wouldn’t even deny the proposed arranged marriage to his face and she was apparently friends at one point with the one who lead to his father’s death. this cuts him a bit. ( also i see again, the trying to insert jarv lore into here? with gar/en saving him? interesting but not nearly as emotion jerking as gar/en finding his armour blood soaked and empty next to an executioners post with the pin signifying them as the closest shit in each other’s lives in the bloody mud c’: )

now, we do not know much until the events of the aftermath short story. this story, told through xin’s point of view, is honestly very depressing and provides a lot more focus on jarv’s collapsing mental state. while in the comic he is hurt and distressed, struggling with the idea of his own views on the matter and then the significant pain cause to him by magic and the possible danger it could cause his people, aftermath shows us a prince who has been stewing on it for the night. occurring the day after, it is told to us he does not look like he has slept and his emotions are raw at the surface. i suggest reading the full story but i will only be talking about jarv’s mentions in this.

so our encounter with jarv in this short story occurs with xin finding him at the training fields. he is described as already breathing with exertion and drenched with sweat, a suggestion that he has been doing this for some time now, and his emotions wild and clear. he is also attacking wildly at the dummy, very much venting but also showing us he isn’t poised or in control of himself. yet when he speaks, calling xin uncle, it seems uncertain. i surely read it with a tired and tentative voice in mind. yet, after a pause, his emotions re-flare and he becomes angry again (something which happens several times over the course of the short story). he speaks coldly, harsh, trying to find someone to take the blame for the events, shifting rapidly from seeing xin as family to seeing him as a simple bodyguard ( something from the previous flash backs show the later of being untrue, and that xin is extremely close to jarv ). i also see this as him struggling with his own thoughts and passions, a war of heart and mind - xin being family vs xin being his father’s bodyguard, in extension we have seen mages murdered my father vs not all mages are guilty, i hate them vs i hate them all.

the prince then decides the best way to interrogate xin is by also trying to vent his frustrations with sparing. in jarv’s short story ‘ ebony, ivory, jasper ‘ we see him as a very level headed tactician which is controlled and ultimately able to see the right plays and choices in things where others can not. this is not that jarv. he is literally striking first, thoughts and questions later. xin mentions he is also not taking his strikes lightly, that he is swinging hard enough to break bone, something one wouldn’t do unarmoured or with someone you care about. he is pacing like a stressed animal, gripping his weapon like it is only lifeline, and forcing xin to fight him like it is his only reprise. another point made which shows jarv’s very altered state of mind is how xin also notes his form is sloppy, jarv is a good fighter, one of the kingdoms best, yet he observes there to be ‘ little finesse to the strikes ’ and that ‘ at any other time he would have berated the prince for his poor form—he was thinking only of attack, and leaving himself open for ripostes and counter-strikes ’. now since we know xin trained him and considers this poor form for him, it is likely jarv is definitely not of these traits normally, something further confirmed when he notes these are something he wouldn’t do now or take advantage because he sees them as caused by his justified anger.

skipping past the first flash back, jarv continues to press xin and eventually just tosses his weapon away when he doesn’t get an answer he wants. the frustration and anger is palpable. the prince isn’t the kind of person to discard something so carelessly, to be so disrespectful as to throw something of his to the ground. jarv has been raised to have the ideas of honour and respect and personal value and virtue as being very important, and the disrespect of tossing one of his weapons, staring at it while someone else picks it up, isn’t something jarv in his stable mind would do. yet he does such and grabs his lance - a sharp and deadly weapon in comparison to his blunted sword - and xin protests using them because jarv is unarmoured. now i have not heard anyone cover this exact fact but i want to talk about it for a bit, xin is armoured but jarv is not. jarv is attacking and not caring about his defence. and now he is making xin fight him with their actual sharpened weapons while only xin is armoured. either of these weapons could kill him, even his own by his own hand if he isn’t careful as noted by xin. and just, he doesn’t care if he gets hurt.

i think this exemplifies one fact about jarv, the first fact i mentioned above. he experiences a great amounts of survivor guilt in the time he failed his troops as a youth and now he sees himself as failing his people and his father by not saving them. he couldn’t even beat syl/as. and now he has to live with that fact, and very alone with it now. he is both trying to find someone else to blame to share in his own self torment or at least have someone either take him out of his misery or give him a punishment that jarv thinks is fitting for his failure. and i think perhaps, while not explicitly noted, xin acknowledges it ‘ “You are not armored,” . . .   “I don’t care,” . . . Reluctantly, his heart heavy, he retrieved his spear and moved back out into the open area in the center of the hall. ’ after all, it was xin in jarv’s earliest lore which remarked on the prince’s altered mental state as one of the people that knew him best, i would say that perhaps this is our new lore equivalent. and perhaps bring another down with him. ( jarv has always had a slight discard for his own life - see his quotes and his colour story - but this is quite excessive. the others can be seen as brave, this is different )

one more flash back later, they are fighting and we know jarv is not holding back. none of the fighting right now is casual, he is serious and very angry. this is contrasted with memories of xin with jarv and how jarv once idolised heros and here he is wielding the weapon in a very non-hero-like way. and yet drakebane itself moves in conjunction with his own actions like a perfect extension of his body. we are told that drakebane ( as obvious by its name ) was forged by the great weapon smith orlon, the same who made pop/py’s hammer, in order to combat a powerful frostdrake named maelstrom and her brood. perhaps digging into it too much, but i do see in essence that while the sword was not working for him yet his lance remains faithful is by his conviction in its original purpose. this lance was created to slay great beings of magic, to kill dragons, for the great kings of demacia to wield against the mages of the runewars. and this fits the mindset this king currently has.

another flashback passed we come back to a xin who is facing a new set of concerns, before he was worried about fighting the prince with dangerous weapons while jarv are unarmoured and now he is concerned that maybe the prince getting horribly wounded is not the only issue. here we see another drastic flip in jarv, he would never hurt someone he cared about, he is especially known to put himself in harms way before anyone else. and yet. he cut xin and xin is reasonably concerned but also unafraid. while it is only explicitly stated that xin thinks there is balance in dying here but it surely seems jarv also has this opinion. they both seem to think death is what they deserve. yet ( as angry as jarv is ) he doesn’t to want kill xin as much as xin wishes not to harm him. he stops as the blade ghosts xin’s skin, begging xin for answers but upon receiving it ( if not by xin’s confession but by his own reasoning ) he just deflates. he works out xin was sent away and so he is left as the only one at fault for ‘failing’. xin was fulfilling his duty, while he failed in his.

instead, jarv is just remains tired, tired and grieving and alone. through the next two flashbacks and jarv’s reaction to them we learn the late king was a stubborn man about what he believed in and that he often put his work ahead of himself and his family despite his love for his son. and just as quickly did jarv sober did his temper re-flare, upon hearing about the rebellion again he declares that they should have killed all the mage prisoners instead of imprisoning them. xin is shocked by this for he remarks that once jarv used to be concerned with the treatment of mages in demacia like his father but acknowledges that this was before what they did to him and that his anger in the moment is justified. but he still reminds him that his father wouldn’t agree with that, as he wouldn’t have once agreed with that. here it is key to see one of the great hurts in him right now is he feels both a failure and he feels betrayed, he snaps back ‘ and they killed him. ’ the lightshields had been working towards making things better for mages and in jarv’s angry thoughts and he feels betrayed by the ones they were working to help, he feels as if his good nature was taken advantage of and hurt by those he cared about. ( also note, canonically, execution is a murderer’s punishment. killing another is punishable by death and this is shown in some stories. )

just as quickly as this outburst begins does it end however, his fire dies and he sheds any mask of princely facade and anger, revealing he is simply lost, scared, sad and confused again. he grips feebly to support, and weeps. likely not the first time given his earlier description, but likely the first true time where he might realise the full emotion and weight of the situation. and he tries to hold strongly to it, he doesn’t have confidence or stability so he is all but begging xin to be it for him. when he is told that xin sees his life as forfeit, jarv grips at strings to keep xin with him. while desperate it is still very controlled though, controlled and thought out. begging wouldn’t work, but xin’s sense of duty would. and once xin starts to relent, he asks formally, appealing to the formal requirements. and once that digs at him, he appeals to the side that is his uncle, for he needs him as much as his kingdom. strategic in all things but it also shows his reliance on xin emotionally in this point. i strongly believe, if xin denied him he would crumple and things would be a lot worse. even if xin thinks he looks more composed after his breakdown.

and the short story ends with xin accompanying jarv to a council meeting. xin remarks at how controlled jarv is compared to his outburst, likely due to two things: 1) he had his outburst and is now not bottling up his emotions as much and is able to control himself better, and 2) jarv is required to look regal. xin notes that demacia needs a strong leader right now and jarv likely knows that just as well ( which will play a part in his next actions ) and so is portraying himself in such a way regardless of how his emotions might still be. i think this is shown well when he asks to see the note xin was to deliver, the contents of which anger him. it is a reminder of his older self, of his old ambitions and everything that he lost. and so he wrings its neck like he has to his old self and what he wishes to do to those that caused this. this shocks and disturbs xin and he is concerned. it is also important to note that the mageseekers are trained to combat magic so keeping them with greater powers, he increases arrests while the note wished to limit them, is advantageous to his wants.

after this point lu/x 5 will fill but we don’t know much of it so we shall skip over it for now. lastly, we have turmoil, a short story i really suggest reading which takes place one month after these events. as not much is relevant other than a few details and the laws of stone i will summarise. in turmoil, it follows a group of demacian soldiers as they are sent to escort a foreign dignitary to the capital, a mage from arbormark called arjen. the soldiers are uneasy with this and some wish that they could be out hunting the rebellions in the woods instead. two mageseekers accompany them as is now required by the laws. as they escort the mage they run into trouble. fearing the villages of the town wish to hurt the mage they are escorting, the soldiers form a tight perimeter and try to escape through a passage and a building. however, it is revealed the mob is not mad about the mage but one of the mageseekers with them. this mageseeker, under the new laws of stone was made to remove a young girl who he had been working with prior, he laments he didn’t want to remove her for she was innocent and he wouldn’t have required to prior but the laws have changed to become stricter and so all mages are considered guilty. the mother of the young mage tries to kill him but she is talked down but the crossbow still fires in a shot which would have killed one of the more vocal mage hating soldiers but arjen carefully uses his magic to deflect the bullet with only that soldier and the main character noticing. the mage hating soldier is conflicted and says nothing, implied to be having a turn of heart. the mother tells the mob to disperse and the envoy continues to the capital.

now from this we learn a couple things: 1) is is now illegal to BE a mage. prior to sy/las it was only illegal to USE magic and so benign mages were actually educated on how to control themselves at times and we treated more of a sickness at other. but now you’re life is a crime. 2) some of the mageseekers themselves are uncomfortable with this. while mageseekers have often been portrayed as horrific people, it is shown in this story as being more a magic focused police service which holds some corruption in higher ranks but also employs people who simply want demacia kept safe and don’t agree that magic is bad but rather bad mages are bad people. 3) that demacia has a lot of allies due to their defence of realms beyond their boarders and also that they understand demacia’s place and don’t condemn them for it. they understand the position of demacia based on its history. 4) these allies are sending who they think will help advise the new king of demacia best including mages and jarv is NOT denying them entry, which shows a willingness to listen which is a step beyond his much more aggressive stance one month earlier. 5) the punishment for being a mage is exile or imprisonment. currently the prisons in demacia are overloaded and there are prison camps in the outskirts. also exile is seen as one of the worst punishments in demacia. and 6) the rebellion is being hunted by the demacian army.

so, after all this, what can be conclude? it is obvious jarv is GREATLY affected by the barrage of death around him. his pre-existing survivor’s guilt is further exasperated by the failure to protect his father and those he swore to and he feels greatly betrayed by many people in his life ( lu/x for claiming to be a friend of the one who killed all these people, the mages he was trying to help striking when he is most vulnerable ). he is greatly alone with losing many friends and family and others being seemingly absent from the events, giving him only those with views which would increase his own anti-mage sentiment if he listens to them. he is lost in his grief and his depression and his anger, his empathetic nature stretched to its breaking point and he has no respite. in the end, jarv is doing what he thinks will protect his people, note he likely does not think mages among his people anymore, and will do anything for their safety. but he is also trying to be reasonable by reaching out to his allied nations as a new king and accepting the advise of mages on these topics. he isn’t murderous, but he is hurt and alone and his actions in his hurt are making him more alone. it’s a vicious cycle demacia has always been in, and now our dear newly crowned king has fallen into it.

a little extra: i do think there is a bit of jarv’s lore MISSING given the situation with shyv. i hope this will shed light on what he was doing and how that also affected him before this happened. i also hope they eventually show us jarv being redeemed for this is FAR from the jarv that the bio shows us on his page and i think that is his true self. just, if i can recall, someone i know once said at your lowest you become your opposite and i think this is true here.

#wow um okay #thats long #like 7 k words long #kudos to you if you read it all #its just me throwing out all my thoughts on the events to read #also not going to lie #this was so long #i didn't edit it at all #sorry for the grammar errors #about / #— out of character `

[contemplatingoutlander]

LANGUAGE MATTERS: When “stating facts” is really just “criticism” in disguise

@obviouslytogether (OT) is upset because some of those awful  “antis” have criticized her comments on keioni_’s IG post.

She was just “stating facts” after all.

I get it. It isn’t fun being criticized. But then again, OT publicly criticized both Sam and MacKenzie on a stranger’s IG but doesn’t seem to want to own that she did.

(BTW, I wouldn’t be doing this call out of OT except that she has left out a few things in her claim that she has been “attacked” by antis. Furthermore, she is using her “expertise” as a “journalist” to try to claim that MacKenzie’s being at that Met Gala pre-party was a lie and that because she is a journalist she knows better than most what is really going on with Sam and Cait.)

Based on some of OT’s statements in her tumblr post defending herself, it makes me question what sort of journalism she does. But based on her first comment on keioi_’s post one would guess she works for a tabloid because her comment was dramatic and filled with disdain:

Here was her initial statement of “facts”:

That’s not an objective statement of “facts” as far as I know. If OT were trying to be objective she would just state the facts without adding judgment to them and if any opinion was being made at the same time she would acknowledge it as such. Here’s an example:

Sam Heughan and MacKenzie Mauzy are rumored to be going to the Met Gala. If this is true, it is unusual in this writer’s opinion because typically only A-list celebrities make the invitation list.

“Who the hell” is a critical judgment, if not an insult. It is not a statement of “fact.” The “LOL” at the end is ridicule.

Then OT tried to explain herself on the post. The parts of her explanation about who is invited to the Met Galas were more objective. (Although I’m told by someone who travels in higher social circles that many prominent people who are not celebrities attend the Gala. OT left that part out.) 

For a journalist, OT’s grammar is questionable here: “Anna Wintour don’t let,,,:  Correct usage is “doesn’t, not don’t.” JS

OT is also incorrect in calling Sam a C-list celebrity. He was C-list. I think he has moved into the B-list range.

But then OT was foolish enough to stray again from “facts” and added a little jab at both Sam and MacKenzie in another comment:

Sam is not an A-lister but he is not a “nobody” either. That is again an insulting critical judgment, not a statement of “fact.” “Nobodies” don’t get wished a happy birthday by Dan Aykroyd.

And her comment about MacKenzie is mean and dismissive: “and MM... I think it’s not even worth to mention her.” [emphasis added]

OT’s English grammar is poor here as well. She should have written “It’s not even worth mentioning her” instead of using the infinitive. She also wrote, “she went as plus one yet.” That is awkward grammar with the “yet” at the end of the sentence.

Let’s hope that English is a second language for OT because if she is claiming to be an American journalist I would be shocked that her grammar is that bad.

Then OT goes on to say:

No OT, you are judging. You are ridiculing. You are leaving out information.  What sort of journalism school did you graduate from?

My guess is if the fan had said the exact same thing but had said Cait had taken the photo OT would have been THRILLED and would not have said that Cait and Sam were “nobodies” who could not possibly be invited to the Met Gala. I believe she would have said it was a sign that Sam’s and Cait’s stars were on the rise because they were invited. JS

See below the cut for a critique of OT’s claim that keioni_’s post was a “press release disguised as a fan meeting” as well as her claim that her journalistic background helps her to see what is going on with Sam and Cait “more clearly” than others.

But let’s go on because in OT’s defensive post on tumblr she says something that lets us know her journalism is of questionable caliber:

So here’s the fan’s “press release”:

keioni_Dear @samheughan, You are THE nicest gentleman ever. Always so kind and sweet whenever you see fans and you always have a smile on your face. It was so good seeing you again-and this time at random! I love you in @outlander_starz and I can't wait to see you in "The Spy Who Dumped Me" and all of the other projects you're working on. Hope you had fun at the Met Gala pre party! 🕴❤️️🎉📸: @mackenziemauzy(thanks girl! Hope you have fun at the Met Gala tonight 😘 ) #samheughan #outlander #jamiefraser #thespywhodumpedme #barbour #scottish #metgala2018

OT thinks THAT was a press release? Go online. There are many examples of what should be contained in a press release. Here’s a sample:

Furthermore, as @aweesassenachlassie pointed out so well in this POST,  keoni_ is a superfan who frequently hangs out at events looking to get photos with MANY celebrities she admires. She wasn’t just there for Sam. (What sort of journalistic investigative skills does OT have that she didn’t figure that out?)

Keoni_ wasn’t hired by Starz to put out a “press release disguised as a fan meeting.” Just Jared had already clearly been contacted to show photos of Sam at that party. There was no need for a “fan press release.”

And why oh why would the fan have gotten her “press release” wrong if Starz had given it to her? It looks like Sam and MacKenzie didn’t go to the Met Gala after all. That was just wishful thinking on the fan’s part.

OT goes on to say:

Just Jared probably posted the photos of Sam at the party based on a press release that was sent to that publication. (And BTW, it might have been Sam’s PR team or TSWDM’s PR team who contacted JJ--not Starz.) 

Right now Sam wants to promote his new film TSWDM. He doesn’t want a sh*tload of angry shippers sending ridiculous tweets to the producer or distributor of the film or to publications because they are angry that a photo of himself and MacKenzie was published in Just Jared. So no photo of her was taken and/ or released. 

Starz could care less who Sam is dating. That’s just a tinhat shipper theory you folks have made up. It has no LEGAL basis and it makes no PR sense to hide a “romantic relationship” between Sam and Cait if it indeed existed. Quite the opposite, it would be a PR goldmine if one existed.

So basically, it appears that OT has little idea what she is talking about. So you might take this statement by her with a grain of salt:

Sorry @obviouslytogether but you appear to not see things “more clearly” at all because you have your extreme shipper rose color glasses on. Until you take them off, I doubt you will see anything clearly.

NOTE: This is just my opinion as a fan, nothing more. If you disagree, please do so respectfully.

#ol fandumb nonsense #debunking samcait misinformation

[superkaramels]

@xsupercorpx :  “Sorry I'm confused please remind me on what post did I comment on?. Never mind, but i still don't see how this answers my question.  By the way I wasn't trying to hate on your account. I did go to the Karamel tag looking for supercorp shipperes who where posting hate in that tag to ask them to take it down. And happened to stumble upon this. I was just curious.  And I mean no hate but just Because you ignore the bad he does or compares all the bad things to the good things he does and sees there is more good than bad doesn't erase the fact that he still does these bad things, but saying that means the supercorp shippers shouldnt ignore all the good things he does too. I know how to keep my opinion of A Character I dislike in my ship tag and I will say sorry on behalf of the supercorp shippers who do this to you guys. I cant change what they do with what they post but instead of fighting about it I would ask them to take it down. And the supercorp shippers are not the only ones who goes to the opposite tag to distribute hate. The karamel shippers do this on IG a lot. We post joke about monel that are funny to us to bring out a laugh but we don't set it in your guys tag yet they decided they want to fight about it. I know its not you but you should be aware that this is not one sidedactions.”

Sorry for replying via post, but this is a sideblog and if I reply with my main blog you may get really confused.

Okay, I totally get that you weren’t trying to hate on me, that’s the reason I answered you, because you were actually very polite and I appreciate that. I wasn’t trying to hate on you either with my answer. Just trying to clarify my motives. It seems like I didn’t do a very good job, did I? (English is not my first language and I suck at explaining myself). So I’ll try again: The reason why I made those gifsets (it’s not just that one you saw. I’m giffing every scene I consider to be important) is because I love that character and I think there are some scenes that are pretty underrated or literally ignored by some people and that are important for the development of the character.

I’m very aware that Mon-El is not perfect, far from it, and believe me, I have never ignored something he has done wrong. In fact I don't see characters I love (even tho I still love them) as perfect beings who can do no wrong. I don't do that with Mon-El or with any other character from any other show I watch. The fact that Mon-El made mistakes is what makes him interesting. That is the whole point of his plot, he is going from being a selfish and spoiled person (as he admitted in 2x16) to being a person willing to help and fight for what is right and to sacrifice himself for the sake of others. That is character development. The writers are trying to build "the hero's journey" and you may not agree, but I think they’ve done a very good job. The problem is that even though I'm able to point when he does something right or when he does something wrong, many other people see everything in black and white and they ignore things that have happened in canon. One of those things is that Mon-El in canon said that he does not like or agree with slavery (as it has been seen in 2x09, 2x16 and 2x17), something that the antis continue using as an argument to insult us.

I really appreciate that you were trying to help us. The fact is that we (karamel fandom) have asked these post hijackers/tag invaders to stop doing that. Their answer was always NO. All of them have always given us very rude answers. We see hate in our tags on a daily basis. Chris Wood (he's just an actor who's trying to do his job) receives hate on social media on a daily basis. I've receive death threats for shipping karamel (and I'm not the only one). People from our fandom who have been abused were treated as if their situation did not matter and have been insulted, people from the LGBT community who are part of our fandom have been called homophobic. Members of your fandom have created multiple tumblr accounts with pro karamel urls for the sole purpose of hijacking our post and insult us. They also decided it was a good idea to boo every Mon-El scene at a screening in LA (in front of producers and cast members of the DC/CW shows). Btw, that screening was a charity event for kids. It is one thing to defend your ship, it is another to bully people you know nothing about just because we don't like the same thing as you (again, I’m not talking about you personally, just explaining what’s going on here). 

I’m aware that not evey SC shipper is a bad person, just like I’m aware that not every KM shipper is a good person. In fact, I’ve blocked some karamel shippers because I really don’t like the way they were behaving.  On the other hand, I'm sure that I have 90% of members of your fandom blocked, either because they are very immature people and have insulted us in one way or another or because their only purpose in live is to make our tumblr experience a living hell. For example, I would love to reblog some Kara and Lena gifs because I really like their friendship, unfortunately I can't because most of the blogs who make Kara and Lena content are blocked.

I’m not aware of the situation on Instagram because I don’t have an account, and I’m sorry if members of my fandom have been rude to you guys, that’s not what we stand for. We have called out people who have displayed that type of behavior in the past. I hope it is resolved soon. I just wish everyone would stay in their line and let people enjoy whatever they enjoy. Ship wars are pointless and stupid and I'm ashamed that a wonderful show like Supergirl have such a toxic fandom.

In case I wasn't clear, I have never pretended to be rude or hate on you with this post. Just trying to make you understand my point of view, just as I try to understand yours.

Edit: I just checked your blog and I saw that you wrote an anti Mon-El post and you tagged it as #Monel. You know, if you're trying to get members of your fandom to stop doing that and you do the same, then what is the point?. Anti tags exist for a reason, please use them and don't post hate on the #MonEl tag. Let’s be respectful with one another. I'm politely asking you to remove that post from the pro tags, just like you suggested us to do in this kind of situations.

#Me #Ana for ts #this was a long post damn #karamel defense squad #Mon El defense squad

[charliesangel0228]

I went to a talk on blackness run by my school's underrepresented identities center.

The ENTIRE meeting was light skin/mixed women voicing their disappointment and malaise- that men found them attractive since they didn't look "too black"; that they didn't feel black enough for the black community; that they realize people hold them up on pedestals and celebrate them but only because they view them as a safe kind of black.

I didn't speak up, but I felt bitter and dismissive.

My shade of blackness means that many people (ESPECIALLY black men) don't find me attractive, and if I complain, people call me insecure and jealous; my shade of blackness means I have to be 3x better in my career path for A N Y O N E to take me seriously; my shade means that I'm forced to see the insulting, condescending surprise on people's faces when they see me leisure reading, when they see my academic writing and that I have great ideas. In that moment I really wished my blackness meant that people loved me. That I wasn't the only one uplifting myself.

But at the end of the day, these women were saying that people's love and celebration for them is based on their anti-blackness. Instead of society fully addressing their racism, it is now using these women to hide it. This leaves them with an identity crisis and without community.

I think their experiences confirmed my own. I'm not insecure and crazy, y'all really do hate dark skinned women, lmao. It gives me confidence to start burning shit down but I also want to hear other dark skinned girls experience. It would be cool to start an IG page, podcast, or blog. If you want to collab inbox me!!!

#Black #black girl #dark skinned #blm #race #social justice #black lives matter #melanin #instagram