#im being vague because i still have a lot to learn and i dont want to say something and then be like mmm nvm

[emerraldstar]

I've been reaching out to other women about female masculinity, and it's making my heart more at ease. It's so much more than what I originally thought. I had this vague definition of what I saw the media portray it as, but it's nothing like that at all. There's so much that I enjoy now that I can continue enjoying and don't have to give up just because I want to explore a new side of myself, and I'm so happy to find that out.

#not gonna lie i was afraid of even thinking about these things because i was afraid that people would see me and say no youre not enough to #call yourself that. #so i stayed quiet but theirs such a healthy open minded community thats very accepting of how one wants to define female masculinity #within themselves #and although im not comfortable to label myself yet i think just having these conversations are helping me #get closer to define what i want it to mean to me. #dont think this will makes sense to yall but im finally opening myself to more in my community. #learning new terms and finding out how i resonate with them. #im being vague because i still have a lot to learn and i dont want to say something and then be like mmm nvm #this aint me and theirs nothing wrong with that! because everyday we learn something new about ourselves #but i hope to figure it out one day.

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

hello! i’m love your post and arts so much! I look at your posts after a hard day and my mood immediately changes to excellent. can I ask a couple of questions?

which pairing with Ethan do you prefer?

and… can we get to know you better? a little biography?

Thank you for your time! I'll be waiting for new arts! (sorry if i made mistakes, my english is not so good. im russian)

i like basically every ship with ethan! it mostly depends on the mood im in, but if im being honest, mithan, winterfield, and wintersberg gets frustrating to think about because they all dont treat ethan well canonically... lethan is fun because they have never met and i can make my own assumptions!

i used to like wintersberg the most and i still do like it, i just have expanded my horizons to other ships as well...., its mostly like a punchline to me though. they have the funniest potential which is why a majority of their posts is just joke comics. i do not like how people try to erase how karl is arrogant and egotistical tho. thats like removing the flavor.... the way karl acts is just very funny to me, hes so lame in a good way and i like how everytime he talks to ethan it sounds like hes twirling his hair and kicking his feet. canonically speaking, karl was very much in the wrong for trying to use rose and not elaborating and i will die on this hill. ethan is not in the wrong for being disgusted and angry that karl would ever try and propose that in the deal. karl is very arrogant so when ethan says no to him it makes him mad and he tries to use fear to get ethan to take his deal (kicking his chair and warning him) i like karl, i like how messed up and arrogant he is but i dislike how people try to portray him as a nice guy. however, in a AU where everythings the same except he doesnt try to use rose i do enjoy the dynamic they could have, especially if the teamed up (not with the deal where they use rose. ethan wouldnt agree unless karl never involved rose in the first place). karl is just a very entertaining character and i like him a lot, hes funny and his personality can be extremely hilarious

mia and ethan is pretty tragic and thinking about it too much makes me a bit sad, imo in a reality where ethan survives re8, he needs to divorce mia. im not saying ethan needs to hate mia and never talk to her again i just dont think they should be so intimate together because of her behavior... please do not take this as anti mia. they loved each other dearly but it wasnt healthy. their relationship was kept afloat by lies and mia doesnt change even though she deals with the consequences of her own actions in re7. she actively tries to hide her past from ethan and is mostly focused on trying to move on and have a normal life even if ethan will have to live the rest of his life in the dark.

she loves her family so much, shes very afraid of them leaving her so she hides all the bad things in the hopes that they wont leave. its selfish, its human, its real, her character is so amazing and i love her. she doesnt learn from re7 and hides important information from ethan again. i geniunly think they should have gotten divorced after re8 if ethan had survived. its tragic and its sad but they love each other so much. it sad because they both geniunly love rose so much but they themselves shouldnt be together. its just sad to think about it. whenever i draw them it usually takes place before re7. they should have divorced on good terms and shared custody of rose.........

ethan and chris is also frustrating to think about... chris is a major jerk in re8, whenever i draw it, its under a unspoken AU that chris did not behave the way he did in re8. his weird behavior in re8 is probably for a meta reason imo. capcom wanted to set up a twist villian so they make chris very vague and unesscarily cruel. while its frustrating that they turned chris into a jerk for the sake of a twist, it still happens in canon and i will forever roll my eyes whenever i see him on screen. he did what he thought was best but imo, execution matters more than the intentions. same applies to mia. they both did things that hurt ethan because they thought it would be the best but in the end they just hurt ethan.

all the ships ive discussed with people ethan has met canonically just makes it look like i dont even like the ships... LOL ... ethan just has horrible luck with the people he meets i guess... but i do enjoy the ships and drawing them, but again all of them come with the canon baggage that ends up making me sad because everyone treats ethan poorly whether they had good intentions or not

which is why leon and ethan is the most fun to draw without getting stressed... LOL... they have never met but just drawing what i think their dynamic would be like is very fun.

please dont take this post personally, this isnt a post declaring why ur fave ship sucks, this is just my own personal preferences and in the end i draw all of them anyways

if i had to rank the ships based on drawing silly comics it would be

wintersberg

mithan

lethan

winterfield

wintersberg has the funniest potential just because of karl and mithan can be funny if u water it down to "i love my wife so much" and said wife comes home with suspicious amounts of hard cash

i enjoy making joke comics far to much

if i were to rank the ships based on how healthy they would actually be for ethan it would be

lethan

winterfield, mithan, wintersberg (no particular order)

sorry 😭

leon and ethan have literally never met but imo it would still be the healthiest because ethan gets to start new

the three other ships r all unhealthy in some way, at least canonically without changing much about the characters (i do like winterfield but just because of how chris behaved in re8 it knocked them down)

i cant even rank them on personal preference because my opinion changes so often 😭 it changes based on discussions i have with my friends or recent art i see that inspires me... me and my friends recently had a discussion about mia and ethans relationship which made me very frustrated and sad with mia so i defiently wouldnt be drawing them anytime soon... meanwhile i hvae been talking to a friend who really likes winterfield often so the conversations we have give me art ideas and i end up drawing it more. if a friend of mine really enjoyed wintersberg or lethan and talked to me about it often id probably start drawing it more, the joys of being a multishipper

it changes a lot based on how im feeling and if im in the mood to draw something funny or something serious

sorry u asked a really simple question and i responded with a essay

and a little bit about myself is that i go by crumb, i am 18 and i go by all pronouns and prefer it/its

im vietnamese and live in texas

i made this tumblr acc solely so i could post my ethan art and im a re7/re8 girly so if ur here waiting for me to draw the re1-re6 characters im sorry u should probably expect nothing

i also make personal animations sometimes which u can find here

thanks for the ask and sorry for the rant!

#ethan winters #crumbessage

[lime1991]

hold on i have to recraft my trolls age hc... i just learned there was a brozone website and on said site we have:

January 2nd 1999 is, maybe, Branch's birthday? And instead of being like "awesome im a big brother" Floyd just goes "thank god im not the baby anymore" after hes born.

Baby Branch's oldest message is this:

February 26th 1999. He's over a month old at this point, but the phrasing of "tonight's show" leads me to believe he was part of the band from literal birth (also why Floyd's first reaction to his birth is "thank you for saving me") and therefore this isnt his first show.

The last logins for all of the brothers is March 11th 1999

And just a day before, according to John Dory, new merch dropped

Soooo i think its safe to say around March 11th 1999 is when the band broke up after their ruined performance, which makes sense that it was also the last time any of them logged into the website. (though i think it would be sad and sweet if it showed branch had logged into it sometime recently but whatever)

So that brings me back around to the age thing.

The trollspedia page states Poppy is around 21-23, and I agree and am more inclined towards 22-23 personally. Seeing as Branch was born in January 1999, he'd be 24 in 2023. But the only thing that confuses me a little is Branch saying its been 20 years since the band broke up:

For 1999 to be 20 years ago, that would mean the movie takes place in 2019. And... honestly that's not too far off from 2023 so i don't mind that being the case, its always vague about what year its meant to be, a lot of animated movies are like this. Also i wanna bring up that the song Bridget and Poppy sing in the beginning (Good As Hell by Lizzo) came out in 2019, SO... its not impossible that the movie is meant to take place in 2019.

SO... with this all in mind... my new theory/headcanon:

As of 2019...

John Dory - 39 Bruce - 38 Clay - 33 Floyd - 28 Branch - 20

And as of 1999...

John Dory - 19 Spruce - 18 Clay - 13 Floyd - 8 Branch - 2 months

ALSO lets not forget the fact that troll age stages are different from humans', a 2 month old is singing and dancing in a boyband. They tend to mature past their actual age really quickly.

(i know these are country trolls, but the idea is still there. as soon as they pop out the egg, trolls are basically toddlers)

And I've tried to keep my theory compliant with what the wikia says (like how Clay's 1999 self is referred to as a teenager, therefore i made him 13) because i believe theyre mostly right. however. i also believe the movie takes place in 2019, not 2023. even if that wasnt the intention of dreamworks, they wrote in the script that its been 20 years since 1999... that can literally only be 2019 lol.

But if we want to imagine it takes place in 2023, heres age hcs for that too:

John Dory - 43 Bruce - 42 Clay - 37 Floyd - 32 Branch - 24

Btw this means, in my hc, Poppy is 19 in 2019 and 23 in 2023, as is implied in the wiki. Which makes sense to me, because Branch is obviously older than her by at least a year. With my hc that Bruce and JD are only a year apart (again, in compliance with the wikia that claims JD was a teenager in 1999 and therefore not 20 like i want him to be. and making the "heart throb" not a minor bc thats weird to me) the moment where Poppy calls JD the "old one" but later fawns over Bruce is made extra funny when the two of them are so close in age.

But i want to say for the millionth time so nobody gets confused bc of all these numbers: I THINK BAND TOGETHER TAKES PLACE IN 2019!!! not 2023. And don't even ask about how the first movie truly fits into this, I DONT KNOW, they definitely did not fully think through a trilogy in 2016. Some things are just a product of when they came out and thats ok.

#dreamworks trolls #trolls #trolls 3 #trolls band together #rant #not a negative rant but i tend to tag my big effing essays like that

[1eoness]

hi! could i request something fluffy? maybe leon spoiling reader with some meal, or cuddles? thanks! ❤️

mentioning meals I AM THE REMINDER TO GO GET A SNACK AND REJUVENATE

and yes ofc i love writing fluffy fluffy hehehehe (im kind of uncreative rn so sorry). btw i'm writing this in the same format as the other one but if you want it to be more structured and narrative just uh tell me LOL

content : fluffy leon kennedy x gender neutral!reader (it's written in second person though). pet names lol

synopsis : leon wants to spoil you so he's feeding you and providing you with an army's ware of cuddles >:)

-food is fuel and leon is a fucking engine

-tbh i hc that leon has a big appetite for sweet stuff,,,, i'm sure a big collective of ppl agree bc he's so squishy squishy [what the fuck am i saying idk]

-anyway enough about me gushing on leon.

-YOU. when will you ever take the time to let him spoil you? are you trying to avoid him?:((

-leon is part kidding. he's not mad ofc but sometimes he can't help but get a tiny bit worried about you sometimes.

-see, leon is a firm believer that a person cannot come to their best senses unless their basic/psychological needs are fulfilled. that includes things like eating, or affection—because when your body senses that you're lacking in something, it will use your brain power to signal you that you need to eat or be smothered with affection! hence you can end up feeling burnt out if u dont pay attention to ur love vitals!! >:(

-leon's mindset will always be applied on you because you're his second heart, you're his tough rock and you need to be taken care of!!

-HE KNOWS WHAT YOU'RE THINKING "affection? that's absurd people can still learn attentively and work efficiently without having to be coddled >:(" while yes in a sense its true—but sometimes you just don't realize that what you need is some time to be vulnerable and intimate, which can explain why your emotions feel a lot more heightened recently than usual (which he notices by the way). you've been tense for a while, and leon reasons that you can't just 'move on' from being overwhelmed with work stress and whatnot—you have to relieve it! but enough about theory.

-your hunger for food or affection is like a 7th sense to leon to be honest. while it's not an accurate intuition everytime, he's bound to think of you once every like two minutes.

-leon actually has very clear and high critical thinking skills. this means he is able to remember a lot of things about you even if he only notices them or you mention it once: this includes your comfort drink, where you like to be touched, hell maybe even the MBTI of your favorite character. and he ESPECIALLY knows what food you like. pad thai, sushi, oxtail, jerk chicken, cake, boba, YOU NAME IT HE KNOWS IF YOU LOVE IT OR NOT

-so when it actually came to asking you what you wanted, he'd send a text saying he's downtown and asking you 'what would you like, baby?'. he's careful with his words and doesn't say "do you want me to get you something on the way?" because it means he's giving you a choice >:( when the whole point is to spoil you because you deserve it.

-and if you answer with something vague like 'anything' HE DOESN'T MAKE YOU SPEAK FURTHER he'll just buy what he knows u like and keep the rest in the fridge if you dont wanna eat it :3 well that's what they're for, right?

"oh, my sweet.." his voice was quaint at the sight of you. leon tried his best to be silent when he entered the room, not wanting to sound like he was pitying you, but seeing you half-covered with comforters, mildly upset and your mind in a frazzle has his heart dropping a bit. you were probably thinking about so many things: meeting some deadlines, picking up this and that from the store, computing this... but you just couldn't organize your thoughts. but that's why leon was here.

your head moved to swivel his direction. "leon.." you smile at him weakly.

it was cold in the city tonight. leon places a hefty white plastic bag of your favorite on the nearby surface before he sits down in front of you from the edge of your bed. he takes the brief second of studying his lover's face before he pulls you into a comforting and warm hug. he can't help but pat the back of his sweet baby's head down, and you feel his lips barely nuzzle onto your ear as he mutters. "y're so good to me, baby. you know that?" leon reminds you before kissing the side of your head shortly. you tried to reciprocate it by giving him a nimble kiss on his cheek, which he gratefully accepts with an eager beam on his lips.

his hands slide down your arms in a soft stroke as he lets go of you gently. the rustling of the bed's layers being heard as leon moves a bit to reach for the hefty boxes of food, which he opens for you once he gives you take your utensil/s. leon's happy seeing you eat. it's a form of reassurance to him personally witnessing you getting the fill you deserve after a whole few days of being so busy and rushing everywhere. it's a calming sense to him as you both soak in comfortable silence while he watches you eat. he was caring less that it's 2 in the morning and caring more about the way the color on your face slowly vibrates back onto your features. you seem less tired, just by a tad percentage. it makes him smile to himself knowing he was able to take care of you. " 'm finished." you mumbled with a hum, feeling a little full and having to lie down. fullness makes you sleepy (and leon knows that!) so he has a subtle, cheeky little grin as he leans over and collects your legs with one arm, pulling you to make you lie on your back. he crawls over to lie down next to you, once again pulling you close to him while he wraps his arms around you— one patting and planted gently on your back while the other cradles your head close to his heart. just where you belong... "you tired, baby?" leon asked shortly and your little nod sufficed. his cheek gently rests against the side of the crown of your head. his touch is soft, it's sweet as he rubs and scratches down your back gently. he gently scruffles at your scalp with his other hand's fingertips, and the motions will send you to a hopefully revitalizing sleep ♡. he places a kiss on the top of your head, like a ribbon keeping its gift from falling apart :( he knows at this moment maybe you're thinking you don't deserve him. but that's so far from the truth.

#leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #re2remake leon #re4remake leon #leon x reader #leon x reader fluff #this is also super bad n rash im sorry ill try to edit it later on

[actualbird]

hiya zak!!! it's 2am and i can't stop thinking about it- but if you had the chance to write how luke gets cured of his illness in canon, how would you do it? (eg. via "surgery, but there's risks"/"oh we found a magical anecdote to your illness, yippee!...etc etc)

hiya "anon" hehe >:3c!!!! first off, thank you for this ask cuz it's super interesting. my answer to this is rather specific and looks bad at first but Trust Me and hear me out on this alright

if i had the chance to write how luke gets cured, i wouldnt make him 100% cured. medically (and this is very vague because im not a doctor), i would make it so that maybe new medication or a new treatment plan is found that makes his illness no longer terminal, but chronic. the new treatment has to be taken regularly as maintenance, along with regular diagnostic tests like EEGs and regular check ups with aaron. the new treatment would also come with a lot of side effects like mood swings, fatigue, nausea, etc.

basically: i dont want him to be cured, but i obviously dont want him to die. however, i want him to have to fight this for the rest of his long life.

it'll be an arduous process, one that never ends, but one he has to get through. and one he dedicates himself to do every day, because it's worth it, because it's worth life,

because he's worth life.

why do i want this? well, first off, it's because i'd love to see more chronic physical illness representation in fiction. it's not always clear cut with illnesses, and sometimes there Isnt a grand cure and it's more like an endless slog of maintenance

second off, i will repeat something i said in a previous ask i answered about luke's illness, but a sudden and 100% cure feels like a too-neat deus ex machina to me, narratively. his illness has been shown to be as Very lethal and Very painful and Very hard to treat, so for all of that to suddenly go away, well....the writing would feel a tad cheap to me if it were that easy.

and third off, because it'd fit well with the themes of luke's stories and luke's character

actually, let me go back to that previous ask i linked because im gonna copy paste a whole lot from it HAHA since my view hasnt changed since i wrote it. in that last ask i say:

in general with stories, i am less drawn to super neat resolutions and im more drawn to resolutions that are more like “and things werent perfect and they never will be, there will always be problems, but our characters will be okay and theyll keep getting better and better, and it’s in this push and pull of struggle and learning and progress and getting through where their happiness lies” ever since luke was a kid, even before he developed his condition, hes had the fear of being a burden to his loved ones. and when he does get his terminal condition, this fear is worsened and he starts to see his existence in other people’s lives as a whole as a burden of pain and grief that isnt worth the trouble. and…i dunno, i just like the idea of him continuing to live but also continuing to have these problems that still spark fear inside of him and still take so much work to manage every day. and out of habit, he braces himself for pain, not just for the kind his condition gives him but from Life because Surely, His Loved Ones Will Get Tired Of All Of This, Of Him and The Problems He Comes With, Right? but surprise surprise, they dont. because they care about him. because this should not and is not a dealbreaker for them continuing to care about him. aaron creates treatment thats more on the preventative maintenance meds angle so luke doesnt have to just wait for a pain episode to pop up and then dry swallow painkillers every time. it’s not infallible , but sometimes luke can have hours, even a whole a day sometimes where the pain hes bracing himself for doesnt come. mc always reminds luke to take his meds whenever luke gets too busy or caught up in a case. he worries at first that it’s an inconvenience to her for her to have to remember his routines for him just in case, but that worry becomes quieter as luke realizes she reminds him in the same tone as she says “good morning” or “have you had lunch yet? wanna join me?”, just this casual and loving thing thats now integrated into both their lives the team are always ready to help too in their own way. when luke gets a pain episode in hq, marius offers distraction in the form of idle chatter on (harmless) internal pax gossip while luke waits for his painkillers to dull down the stinging. when luke feels uncomfortable tingling crawling across his whole body while out with vyn, vyn subtly helps luke move from a crowded area to a quieter one where outside stimuli cant further overwhelm luke’s senses. when it’s a bad grip strength day and all luke wants to do is punch something and fuck his useless hands up even more, artem tells luke about custom silicone grips that exist for things like pens or knives or such and that they could look for some next time they go shopping. it is not perfect. but luke’s life, even with the pain, is still worth living. everybody is trying to help and eventually, luke learns how to start helping him self along with them too.

in summary: i think luke is a fighter. i do wish he had less battles to fight, but one battle that is important for him to fight is the fight to believe that he is worth living and worth joy in spite of it all

so if i had my way, i'd write him having to manage his illness for the rest of his life

and i'd also write him having a full and happy life while doing that anyway

thank you for the ask!! :'D

#asks #anon #''anon'' I KNOW WHO YOU ARE...AJHSVFLAFKAJS #i hope this response is amenable to u ;w;

[eggtwobroes]

big post explaining/apologizing for my (eggtwobroes/theyhitthepentagon) behavior under the read more

sorry for maintagging this i just. think its important

i dont really kniw how to word what im thinking so im like. going to type it as im thinking. but i wanted to make a real genuine post explaining my behavior over the past year, because ive been a dick there is no avoiding it!! this post is going to be about how ive acted from june up until now. im mostly going to be explaining the situations and apologizing. if you see this please feel free to share it around, i know it most likely will not reach alot of people because i have like. a loot of people blocked. and alot of people have me blocked. idk please share this ok thank u

back in june 2022 (specifically one year tomorrow, june 16th) i got like. really worked up after i had foundout that most of my adult mutuals (and some people i followed) were drawing hlvrai nsfw! the only post i had made about it (at least from what i remember) is liiike a not Kind post that basically said "hey if u like hlvrai nsfw please block me i thought that was common sense". after i posted this a large hlvrai artist (either by chance or caused by me) posted like "hey if u shit on hlvrai porn ur homophobic! sex is an important part of gay relationships etc etc"

this caused a Massive out break of discourse over hlvrai nsfw and me getting alot of adults in my inbox being weird towards me. here i feel its important to mention that:

when i was 12, i was around Ex Friends that posted a lot of porn of media i liked. even though most of them were teenagers and not that much older than me it Greatly Impacted Me and how i act, both related to what i saw and how i was treated

i used twitter from ages 12-15 (recently left) and you know how they handle conflict there. its not good

i dont think either of these excuse how i acted (but they may explain it)

the combined pressure of getting a bunch of adults in my anons being (from my perspective) really weird about this 14 year old kid who doesnt want porn artists to interact, and the unhealed trauma of Being Exposed To Homestuck Porn When I Was 12 (a devastating situation that everyone goes though all the time) i didnt really. handle it in a Good Way. which Means i sent horrible anon hate to people.i dont clearly remember if i made alot of public posts about the situation at the time (beyond answering the anons i was getting) but if i did im very very VERY sorry.

i feel like. alot of how i acted during this time (june-early august, mostly) was extremely Dickish and rude. as much as i justify or explain why i acted the way i did, i was still causing issues and handling the situation in a way that was unhealthy for not just myself but for everyone else around me. for this i really genuinely do apologize as much as i can, to the people ive hurt (melonsharks, xenodogz, many other artists) and to the people who were annoyed by me rehashing 3 year old drama. ever since the situation i have been working towards learning to block people and move on if they make content that makes me feel nauseous.

As for how ive acted in recent months, mostly over characterization, im not going to pretend that im already a new person. because im not! as much as i say im trying to be less of an asshole im just Not. it takes effort that i feel like im not putting in.

for those who just Dont look at my pages often enough, i will occasionally make posts about how hlvrai fans treat or characterize the. characters. and lets behonest these posts are really rude and ive been working on at LEAST being more vague or keeping it in private or like. just Not Posting it. but of course i HAVENT done all of those things! ive been really unvague!

ive posted direct screenshots of authors writing (someone younger than me, ive recently learned) to shit on it for being mischaracterized. i should Not have done that. at the very least i should have kept my thoughts to myself, not even shared with my friends.

after reading how other authors and artists have felt about the things ive said, and looking at the way ive come to think of other artists or authors in the community, ive realized that even though i thought i was targetting mischaracterization and poor treatment of the characters, i was harming and discouraging artists and authors who are still learning and growing as creators.

for this, im VERY very sorry to all of the artists and writers ive hurt or discouraged with my posts. i want to personally apologize to joyflameball, for publicly posting about and hating on your writing and the discouragement i caused as a result. i should have never put mischaracterization over your own feelings, and i definitely should not have put your work on blast, especially because we are (i think) around the same age. i will be trying as best as i can to deconstruct the way ive come to think of other creators in this community and support other creators as best i can.

i dont expect to be forgiven for the way ive acted, since alot of this is VERY very recent and so far i dont think ive shown any signs of improvement. i am writing this post now because i want you all to know that i will be trying my hardest to become a better person, change the way i think of other people, and change the way i act in public. i dont think my actions can be excused, as much as i try my best to explain them from my perspective. ive undeniably hurt many people. if i havent addressed something important, or if you have any questions/things to say, please feel free to send me an ask or dm me at wretched yaoi lich#9564 on discord. im most likely going to be queueing this post alot so my followers see it. thank u for ur time

#veru sorry if this isnt well articulated or put together because i just. typed as i was thinking

[verdantglow]

ooooh okokokok

Grimdark griann and horror terror watcher/listeners sounds SO SICK

Also i hope you know i genuinely laughed when you said he mightve fished it up. And then i was like "Do Trolls fish? Would that be considered an act of aggression against the top two castes?" and then i decided it would be really fucking funny if Griann was fishing and then Scar swam over, and either purposefully or not, got caught on Grianns line, so our beloved candy blood man fishes up his beloved moirail. I imagine it has happened on multiple occasions.

I am so excited you said that because i personally love Cub and Convex so much, they mean so much to me. Also Iskall!! I love that man!!! And Doc would be such a fun addition to the cast (I personally imagine him as an indigo blood because.... well. sometimes he reminds me of Equius. And despite my hatred for Equius i say this in the most affectionate way if that makes sense) (I dont hate Doc hes such a silly guy)

Dont feel too much pressure about the ships! I can't speak on behalf of anyone else but i know i personally am happy to wait to see them whenever youre ready to put them out, although i AM excited to see who.

I think word of mouth spreading also works really well, although I am genuinely so interested in how exactly it got up to Scar in the first place. As in like what is the lineage from Griann to Scar. I feel like I'd need to know the other blood castes of the cast, and also how closely you're sticking to troll society canon in the way that generally high and low bloods dont mesh too often.

Also, if you have decided it. Im very interested in learning who/what everyones lusus is? If you even just have a combination of animals for a few.

I'm assuming you welcome fanart, but if we slightly change designs/make our own designs (for trolls whose designs haven't made their appearance yet), is that ok?

Oh man, I think Griann definitely has to fish now & yes, he 110% fishes Scar up on multiple occasions. Actually, fuck it, that might be how they meet. In fact… while they knew each other to the extent of being vaguely recognized usernames on the VLARP forums earlier, they actually met in person when Scar got tangled up in one of Griann’s (illegal) fishing nets. Griann had been preparing himself for a fight or flight kinda situation when he noticed a violet blood in his nets, but that proved rather unnecessary. Scar, while he gave Griann some crap about how his nets ought to be more visible, was much more interested in chatting than actually in any way making Griann pay for the slight. This became A Thing, Scar occasionally getting caught up in the nets, though it was never really clear how often this was an accident or not. When Griann was looking for people for 3rd Life, he happened to mention it to Scar, who demanded he be allowed to play. Now, at this point, Scar was really just ‘that odd violet blood who can’t avoid nets & talks a lot & thank fuck doesn’t want me culled’ to Griann. However, when Griann recognized his username from around the community, he figured he’d give Scar a chance.

(There is definitely some angst in here somewhere about how Griann didn’t see Scar for multiple perigees after 3rd Life & how despite their moirallegence during the game, Griann came to doubt whether Scar still wanted anything to do with him after the blood bath in the cactus ring…)

Interesting to think of Doc as an indigo blood! Though I am tempted to make him a low blood with no psychic powers…. Hm… I’ll have to give this more thought… (Okay adding this last minute before posting, but gold blood Doc whose lusus is a swarm of bees that help run all his tech. You know. The Hivemind.)

Okay, so lusii. Here’s who I’ve got figured out from my list:

- Scar: some sort of mercat? Like a purrbeast, but aquatic. A murrbeast if you will.

- Lizzie: Gl’bgloyb, ‘cause she’s every fuchsia’s lusus

- Jimmie: canary. It just has to a canary. Tiny fragile bird that Jimmie’s constantly desperately trying to keep alive.

- Tangoh: a warden. Don’t ask me how wardens got on Alternia, but they are definitely a thing there in this AU. Other trolls (especially low bloods who don’t know him) are terrified of Pancakes, but Tangoh mostly regards him with fond exasperation as he needs a lot of looking after.

- Wrehnn: dog/woofbeast, think German Shepard

- Gem: A deer, but if deer were terrifying predators. It looks like a deer for the most part & people tend to underestimate Gem when she shows up on a skittery prey animal. That is, until her lusus opens her mouth & they see the impossible number of teeth she has.

- Bedubs: a horse of some kind, for sure. Maybe a unicorn, who are seen as fearsome beasts on Alternia. After all, what’s more hardcore than having a single, sharp horn for goring on your forehead?

- Pearle: owl-wolf. Like a wolf that’s got giant eyes & owl wings.

- Mummbo: giant moth

- Eethos: arctic fox with moose antlers

- Skizzl: Irish Wolfhound

- Martyn: snow creeper named Colin

- Joel: honey badger named Jeremy

- Cleaoh: Snow leopard

- Bigbee: a frog the size of a pit bull

- Impuls: ground pangolin. Can’t explain this really, but both my fiancé & I came to this independently. So uh I guess Impuls(e) is pangolin coded??? (Something about burrowing, something about being cute as fuck but razor sharp, something about looking like they want to ask you to a middle school dance.)

- Scohtt: sea otter

- Griann: chicken. Might even actually be a Minecraft chicken, not sure how committed to that bit I am.

Whoops totally just got absorbed in this & figured out all the lusii lol. But this was so much fun, my fiancé & I have been researching animals & YouTubers for the last like hour or so & now my search history is all stuff like “weird big cat” & “animals that are cute & friendly but also could definitely kill you.”

I’m sticking to the separation between castes pretty loosely, mostly because (spoiler) a lot of the out of game plot revolves around rebellion against The Condesce. So it would make sense that trolls who want to overthrow the status quo would be less bound by social norms. Every group pretty much has at least a blue blood or higher in it, & at least one low blood. Not necessarily because I planned that, it’s just sorta how things shook out.

For fanart, yes, omg I welcome it so much! If you want to tweak designs a bit or make up a design, that’s cool. (Though also, if you want in AU references for anyone, I’m always happy to throw together a rough reference sheet! Might take me a day or so, depending on spoon levels, but I’d be delighted to have a reason to draw any of the many trolls I haven’t yet!)

#trafficstuck #trafficblr #verdant answers #verdant rambles #hermitstuck

[acaciapines]

hiiiiiii bestie hiiiii hiiiiiii hiiii <3

no one else is asking so I will take one for the team. well maybe someone has asked but I will ask again if not. can you please tell us abt how kris and noelle meet in the drk au, and noelle’s uh. reaction to seeing dess again when she thought dess was dead? and ig by extension, kris. not sure if this is getting into spoiler territory so feel free not to answer or be as vague as you want :p

am also interested in hearing more abt ralsei and susie in this au. Please

have we talked abt this a bit? definitely. but the ppl on tumblr should hear it also and I like hearing abt it smile

hii hi hi <3

i do not know how much of this will be new for you but it will be new for everyone else so LETS GO!!!

NOELLE AND KRIS

okay so. i think i've mentioned this in other posts before, but the whole event that starts off everyone finding out dess and kris arent actually dead is that kris dives into a dark world! theyre trying to close a dark world like dess does, because they think that maybe!! that way!! dess will come back and be proud of them and love them and then she wont leave so much! because kris can close dark worlds too, see? now they can go with her!

they tell this to frisk, swear frisk to secrecy, and then! vanish lol they're Gone. the way dark worlds work here also isnt fully solid but im treating them sort of like mystery dungeons in pmd, so they dont fully follow the laws of like, physics and the like which means that even tho where kris lives is Very Far from hometown, noelle, susie, and ralsei are still able to get to the same dark world from hometown!

do not ask me what this dark world is like. i have No Idea. probably somewhat inspired by kris's life but i have not gone so far as to plot it out lol. the important part is that susie and ralsei split off from noelle (like in cyber city) and so noelle ends up running into kris, who has not only gotten lost but is in WAY over their head lol, so she saves them and kris begrudgingly agrees to stick with her. they totally couldve done this on their own. theyre sticking with noelle for her own safety. and noelle is just like yeah sure lol.

while traveling through the dark world together, noelle and kris have no idea who the other is! not only do they not really remember each other (noelle has a few vague memories, kris was even younger when dess took them so they dont remember anything at all), but they've both grown up a lot and in kris's case are fully presenting as a monster. they bond a bit over both being deer-monsters!

they cant fully communicate, tho...kris would be nonverbal throughout this entire trip and since noelle never grew up with kris she doesnt know monster sign language. she might remember a few words from her childhood but not enough to understand kris and even if she did she is a stranger so kris wouldnt sign OR speak to her anyways lol. but they do help each other out and close the dark world together! they come out in hometown and noelle promises to help kris find their parent cause they did Not mean to come here lol, and that is when! she checks her phone and shes gotten a text from toriel about a missing kid, and she's like....hey so uh i think your parent might actually be at my house lol wanna come by.

(while kris was stuck in the dark world, frisk got Very Worried and did eventually spill everything to chara, and thats how chara and frisk end up in hometown desperately trying to find kris! they come across toriel who helps them out and thats why they're at the holiday-dreemurr house).

and so things are all fun and fine until noelle and kris get back to noelle's house, and go inside, and kris is reunited with chara, and when that happens toriel sees this child and is like. holy shit. is that my dead kid.

and the fic would end there lol! (in my head this is a series, so, it would span multiple fics) another fun thing is this is the moment where noelle learns kris's name--so it wont really be a surprise for the audience cause i feel like most people could catch on that this is kris (remember up til this point we only follow noelle and the hometown crew, so we think dess and kris are dead), but if you didnt...

NOELLE AND DESS

honestly i dont know how noelle would react... i feel like she wouldnt have as big a response as everyone else! to her dess is less a person and more like, the story she's told as to why she cant do all the same things her peers do, why her mom + stepmom are so overprotective, why asriel stayed behind instead of going to college...dess loves noelle but noelle is like literally who are you. so when dess tries to like, bond with noelle, noelle doesnt want this...she grew up without a sister and that bond isnt going to form again! she doesnt know who this woman is!

its. very hard for dess needless to say. and for kris who sees how much dess is investing in noelle and theyre just like. okay well why was she never like that with me. which then leads to tensions between noelle and kris, which pushes kris to make some Very Bad Choices, and and and. plot <3

RALSEI AND SUSIE

actually the relationship ive thought about the least if im being honest. but i was talking about them to you last night and i think that like...there IS a level of antagonism that doesnt exist in deltarune canon. ralsei is trying to hard to stick to the prophecy, and when susie in this story's version of chapter one ignores it to be a villain with lancer, that hits A LOT HARDER in a world where from the very start the prophecy is being broken (since its two monsters who fall lol)

plus ralsei is also dealing with a lot of feelings shes never felt before--jealously, envy, not being able to just ignore her dysphoria anymore...shes a lot more aware of her crush on noelle and so noelle having a crush on susie isnt helping...

LIKE THEY ARE FRIENDS i think ralsei feels a LOT of guilt about all of this, and when its just her and susie things are good! they make sense!!! susie makes her wanna BE things wanna feel like maybe these things she feels are okay...but then everything always comes crashing down and its. bad again.

annnnnd thats all i think!! as always anybody can ask for follow ups. i'll spoil this entire au lol im sure things will change as i write it and besides. this is gonna take A While so when i do post it in like 2026 yall wont remember what i said here lol.

#drkau #deltarune #ask #ash my beloved ash #the 2026 number isnt a joke btw in my head this is All Of Deltarune. so. yknow. a clean 500k words or something like that #IM SO NORMAL ABOUT THIS AU.

[rianafying]

i’m having a really bad day emotionally. idk if it’s my period hormones or bpd but i’m just in a really sucky mood today. yesterday i recovered from one illness that i had since late jan. i’ve been desperately waiting to feel better and this morning i woke up with another kind of illness. and i’m doing my best to recover from this as well. and something triggered my abandonment response and im just having a really really hard time right now. and i can’t even freely talk about it to anyone or even write about it in my journal. i’m just. so sad right now. i’m not abandoned but i feel that way. i have been feeling abandoned for a while now and a small thing that happened last night really amped it up. then this morning i woke up with a crazy amount of physical pain and fever from said illness and im also severely dehydrated because i have been too upset to drink water so i’ve been forcing myself to drink lots of water all day. and had to take painkillers and sleep the fever off. all by myself. i hate being by myself. but it was worse when i was living with family back in bangladesh. somehow i felt even lonelier and more horrible there. lately i’ve had very little hope about myself and my future. i’m just going through a rough time mentally. so are my loved ones. i’m sobbing as i’m writing about this. this isn’t even bad. like it’s just my mental illness over reacting and my hormones possibly amplifying the negative emotions. but nothing terrible has actually happened it’s just that i wanted something and i can’t have it and even in my dreams, my desires plague me. it all sounds vague but that’s on purpose because i can’t openly talk about it. even when faced with much greater difficulty, i have handled things better but right now even though it’s not actually that bad, i feel exceptionally sad. i did my groceries. made the right decisions. i literally did my very fucking best today. and yet i feel nothing but awful awful awful. even some self hatred and self pity. i’m having a hard time trying to logic myself out of this one. maybe it just needs some time. the problem is that i don’t have all that much time to give. i have a class early tomorrow and it’s one of those classes that i really have to participate in and even though i normally look forward to this class, im dreading it right now. i dont have the energy to learn a whole bunch of things right now. and my friends invited me for drinks after classes, which is great but sucks because i literally have 5$ in my bank account to last me the whole week, and today was just monday. idk how this happened. actually i know exactly how this happened, i paid of my medical bills when i got paid this weekend. that’s why i have nothing left. but it’s a big relief. that i have paid off all my hospital debt. it’s a huge deal. and it’s done. now temporarily i’ll struggle a little but it’ll be okay soon. also it was just 11:11pm and i made a good wish. i’m going to try my best to bring it to fruition. rn im still a bit sick, and im not gonna beat myself up for having a bad couple of days. i know im doing my best. my best is not as good as other people’s but it’s mine. and i am choosing to go easy on myself. i’m feeling a fever coming back. the plan for the rest of the night is to maybe rest till my fever goes away. then watch the movies i downloaded w the library wifi, because guess what, i didn’t have money to get wifi this month. so i barely use my data and i try to download as much as i can at uni and at the library. it has been kind of good for me. to be off the internet mostly. this reminds me i should deactivate my instagram soon. idc if i loose my work flow. or maybe try to find balance between life offline and online. after i’m done resting and my fever subsides, ill boil some eggs and what not. i deserve to eat well. nvm im back to crying in my fetal position. oh god i feel so bad. i feel so bad right now. i can’t do anything about this. and the things that i can fix, i don’t. this is literally my life. crying about things i can’t control and ignoring the things i can control

this is the worst i have felt in 2024 so far. i’m so sad that it’s giving me a headache. i’m so disoriented and confused and tired and sad i don’t wanna do anything. i’m depressed as fuck. why does this happen to me. oh god i let a couple of hours pass, and i’m doing a little bit better. this is so stupid.

#personal #journal entry

[wulvert]

so ive heard that you have more triptrack lore???????? *stares at you intensely, full of platonic love for you and your work* would you like to tell us about it? :D

hello! thank you so much.... some more important lore is probably upcoming pretty soon so i wont spoil that ( if anyone even notices the lore anyway idk )

some stuff i probably wont go into much more than whats already in the comic is reds backstory, i think you can kinda pick up the vibe of whats going on with him, but i can go into it here + some stuff abt the world :) some people picked up on it fine, and some people still seem confused about it, but the uv levels output by the sun in triptrack are too high for human survival without protective measures. i dropped out of highschool and i never went to classes before that anyway, i have no idea how science works. the ozones fucked in some way. i usually call it murder sun. you can wear sunscreen but its a bit risky, and extremely expensive. only really rich people can afford it & you still need to protect your eyes & mouth. masks and gloves r more common. half masks are more of a fashion item but remove some risks associated with sunscreen.

red always wore a mask but someone he was working with (nefarious work) ripped it off to try kill him a while back, you can see a hand print on his face 125 i think, some people assumed its his own handprint but it came from that person holding him down. they were friends, so hes a bit distrustful of people now, understandably i think. It damaged his eyes a lot but he could afford to get them fixed a little bit, he only had the money to do that and nothing else, his skins still kind of actively injured, not healed bc hes never been able to afford healthcare. Red doesnt feel negative about how he looks at all, its the least of his concern- hes in excrutiating pain 24/7, he just wants his facial nerves dealt with & doesnt care about anything else- hes considered getting the handprint tattood to match the rest of his face, but he decided its better to save his money for other stuff. stealing tex will get him enough money for fairly permanent pain relief, after that i imagine he'll just get a new mask & put some less ugly clothes on and leave the whole stealing thing behind, he's very tired. triptrack wouldnt have happened if red had free healthcare.

just to like state outright, tex is a robot, some poeple believed him when he said "im not a robot", sorry i didnt even think abt people thinking he was telling the truth, my bad. shae ( if anyone remembers her its been 60 years ) isnt a robot, though. Terry is the younger brother, he shares a lot of code with tex but ms tarantula built his body, whereas she didn't tex's. tex is a lot stupider than terry because of creative differences at the time of tex's creation i guess. he can get smarter but he's been very sheltered his entire life. Terry doesnt really care about being a robot (he doesnt care about much) but tex appreciated red not knowing at least for a little bit. Shae will probably sue mt. co. if anyone. remembers. that. either. I think for my next comic im going to make whole chapters and upload them in chunks like that so people dont have to read it so slowly.

also not very important but glass city used to be an ocean!

you can see a little bit of water at the corners of this panel, and theres whale skeletons scattered around. also they tried to built a dome around it to keep the uv out but it was a disaster, shards of it also just hang out around the city from that.

also theres not very many people want windows, so all the more space for advertisement hell.

I definitely dont think i've gotten triptracks stuff across very well, but also i kind of like how vague it is. triptrack has a l o t of issues, and i want to go back to it when its done and make a like,.. triptrack dx or something lol. but its my first comic so like.... to be expected i guess.. ive learned a lot from it. paperteeth also has so many issues & i didnt really put much i learned from triptrack into it but thats because it was supposed to be a fun little side project! that i didnt have to think about too hard! then it exploded and ate triptrack for breakfast. rip. ( i am grateful though i just. didnt think that would happen, if i did, i would have tried harder lmao) so. yeah!

#asks

[strawberrybabydog]

lesbean!! 🫵🫵🫵 YIPPEE!! tbh yeah our own relationship with attraction is kind of complicated (we prefer the blanket queer or sapphic, dont really care to deliberate too much on that kind of stuff), those of us who are allo are primarily into fem/women, but we are also considering having a relationship with a dude we are not romantically attracted to. and also we are never certain if we are genuinely not into men or not. our mother constantly bemoans that we are like that because of her not-the-best relationship with our father, which, is probably not the case but even if it were so what. that's just the way we are. and you really wouldn't be any less valid as a lesbian if there are external factors influencing your attraction. whichever way you came to be queer or lesbian doesn't matter, you are who you are and that's it. even if it doesn't turn out to be the case, who cares, you learned something. also really dont worry about community history. i have shit memory and not matter how much i try to learn i just forget. doesnt really change my attraction and how i am treated by other people => doesnt really invalidate my place as a queer person in the community. also hello to the baby butch!!! we need more. idk if it's bcs we live in a queerphobic country but even though i am pretty fem presenting behaving in a certain way around women made feel butchy and like a knight and there are very little people like that around me and i decided that even tho i am probably not really butchy i will sort of try to be one. we are holding hands and fumbling while trying our best to be butch. baby butches for da win. also we feel we would be very down for butches ourselves if there were more around us but alas. we must provide the service ourselves. TL;DR you can do whatever you want forever. even if it may seem like some lesbian communities dont accept you there is ALWAYS a place for you and us, because there should always be a place for people just stumbling into this, at 12 or 24 or 48 or 96 yo.

OMG we are literally on the same wavelength rn !! i think in the post i said lesbian but we prefer sapphic too!! we have a sapphic flag kandi on our crutches :0] luv to keep it simple and vague

i have a complicated relationship with men too (my relationships with men have ALWAYS been queer still!!). i love and adore men so much and im attracted to them (differently?) but... kind of, not in practice? if that makes sense. another sapphic headmate selfships with a fictional man but him being fictional man is a big part of why we love him so much - it can project sapphic romanticism onto him and make him treat it more like a butch lesbian partner treats their femme than a male partner treats theirs (ex: your knightly butch feeling, which i dont think any of my man partners have felt for me? but is much more common for butches to express). i guess right now i'm just not sure what my expectations are for real life men and i'm trying to navigate it, but of course plurality also makes things much more complicated with different headmates having different ideas of romance and sexuality. i think i feel like, i love men, but men dont love me in the way i ask them to; its not a feeling reflective of reality, its just personal stuff. we're definitely attracted to whatever masculinity means for whoever our partners might be, if they happen to be masc ♡ we're sappy and find all expressions of gender from partners super hot tbh - everyone wears confidence and identity very well ♡♡ (<- we're also ace-spec or demisexual, if that makes sense. i think a lot if labels can be used to describe us now but like i said i also like to keep it simple. putting effort into your appearance whatever that looks like is ♡ugh♡. this type of attraction is very much rooted in my BPD but i really enjoy being infatuated with my partners in this eyes-only-for-you way)

our gf is femme and also gives me that big butchy hero feeling, but her softness also brings me back to girlhood and finding safety in that feeling too. we also have butch headmates ♡. ive never been with a man who has a connection to girlhood so i find myself more curious/intrigued by their experiences with boyhood than finding comfort in it/in them as a person by extension because i find such deep comfort in girlhood and unfamiliarity (or personal hurt) with boyhood. im also trying hard now to unlearn a lot of what my abuser trained me into, lots of misogyny so trying to unlearn whats left of my internalized misogyny which seems to thrive in my relationships with men -_- its a lot of personal stuff i have to think about in my relation to the rest of the world (early 20s moment lol)

it seems like a lot of sapphics have complicated relationships with eachother, ourselves, and what non-sapphics mean to us ♡ we are so brave and hot

im actually so fucking relieved to hear that Knowing Shit about lesbian history/discourse/etc isnt necessary. i guess i just follow a few particularly discoursey sapphics and it kinda poisoned my brain, but i felt like if i didnt have an extremely nuanced opinion on every historic lesbian ever i wouldnt be allowed to interact with anyone. there arent any queer spaces i think i can visit irl so i have very minimal exposure ... ive mentioned my horrible high school GSA a few times, and, yeah - "wasnt queer enough". even though i still identified as queer and my partner was a bisexual man (making our relationship, you guessed it, queer) all that mattered to them was that i was dating a cis man so i must have been some type of traitor to them because they were the type of peopke who think Men=Evil (🙄) (meanwhile, apparently some of my het peers (mutual friends) were betting mcdonalds meals on whether or not i'm a lesbian, which doesnt really feel Great? especially when they say it to your face and ask you what your sexuality is in the middle of science class??)

yeah um the lived experience of having a sexuality is complicated im trying to go with the flow but internalized homophobia (and external) is just. There! and im not at a point where its super-easy for me to detect it internally so -_- i think things will get better over time ... this is just like how when we were splitting into multiple it was also scary and hard and we felt like we were doing it wrong... things will be okay in time

#sry i rly went off there its a pretty long one lol i hope u dont mind im sry ♡♡♡ #not dog #personal #asks #delete l8r #<-maybe idk. some yall meanies lol. but i want to talk abt my experience cuz yeah maybe i am normal :0)

[everythingsinred]

I spent a whole day reading your Natsume analysis and am so excited to read Mikan's version. I wanted to ask about your thoughts on what Natsume was doing during the four years he was apart from Mikan. In Kageki, we learn that he took a lot of missions to get credit. But what do you think his mental state was like? Do you have any fic recs? I love making myself sad from Natsumikan angst.

hi! im so happy you read the natsume analysis! it makes me happy to hear people enjoyed it! i just recently made a table of contents for my essays and general ga postings so if you need help navigating the mikan essays, check out my pinned post <3

to answer your questions about what natsume was up to while mikan was gone, im pretty sure in kageki narumi mentioned that natsume had some negative behavior and attitude, but the extent of that is left vague. allegedly the missions he went on after she left were not alice-heavy or life-threatening but we know that one of those missions was to be toma's bodyguard and... bodyguarding tends to be dangerous? thats in the job description, pretty much literally. im not entirely sure how he was expected to bodyguard WITHOUT using his alice, but thats what they imply. did he take martial arts? did he carry a gun? who knows really. either way he should not have been permitted to continue doing any missions.

just in general, i think he was pretty depressed without mikan around. i mean natsume was in a HORRIBLE suicidal depression for two years before he met her and falling in love with her happened because she saw value in his life that he hadnt seen before. while she was there, he had developed a sense of purpose in his life and a will to live he hadnt had. it was bc of her that he started bonding with class b. now that shes gone, im sure hes very upset especially because its not certain he'll ever be allowed to see her again, granted he even lives that long.

but as much as i see him being depressed and a little miserable, he still has friends and a strong support system at the academy now. he has his best friend, plus the kids he allowed himself to befriend while mikan was around. theres pictures in the memorial book that depict middle-school aged natsume hanging out with The Boiz, and there's photographs in kageki that imply he wasnt completely isolating himself from his classmates during mikan's absence.

so with that in mind, i think he's depressed and sad about mikan being gone for sure, but he still has a will to live, a support system, and a sense of purpose (seeing mikan again) so that he isnt ENTIRELY devastated during those few years.

we can see when he reunites with her that he kinda expected her to remember him as soon as she saw him, and that gives us insight into how exactly he processed her stolen memories. (smth like, "she doesnt remember anything. so even if i did see her id probably have to make her fall in love w me again and im not even sure how i did it the first time! but she did love me right? i mean if she really loved me, she'd remember me eventually. i cant imagine forgetting her so im sure since she loved me that she'll remember as soon as she sees me!" and then he holds onto that thought so tightly that he ends up shocked that she doesnt remember). those thoughts probably kept him afloat too.

i really have mixed feelings about mikan leaving the academy in the first place though. i just dont think that plot point was executed very well so i never really got very into it.

as for fanfic recs, i cant think of many off the top of my head that have much to do with that time period of natsume on his own, but there is this one, (paths that lead home by MCaroba) which is about natsume going on a road trip with his friends!

as for angsty fics that are NOT related to that specific time period, here are some:

Ten Years to Date by November Romeo (the kids are assigned to write about their futures and natsume refuses. canon!verse one shot) (ps lots of her canon fics are in the same universe and theres a deal of angst involved there too, though her canon!verse fics take place in an alternate future of the kids in high school. i do recommend reading pretty much everything she's written for ga)

Tired by FearandLoathingXIX (hurt/comfort related to natsume's sickness. canon!verse one shot)

My Happy Ending by Little Miss Giggle (au where the kids go to a music school.... it starts off silly and fun but it gets pretty damn angsty. multichapter and one of the better known fics in the fandom)

Steal (my breath away) by Rock-n-Round (au one shot where alices exist but they're a bit weird and hard to explain. this one is EVISCERATING. and very beautiful)

Before You Hit the Ground by Ducky-san (au multi-chapter fic where mikan runs away from an abusive home and meets natsume who is in a gang against his will. i actually LOVE this fic so much... but it does contain some triggering material, like discussions of child abuse and implied sexual abuse.)

Right Before Your Eyes by pressuredtreasure (au... i don't think i can say much about this without spoiling it, but it's basically mikan missing natsume)

Oh Hello World also writes a lot of one shots, some of which are pretty angsty.

i'm really sad.... i was gonna link some other fics but i couldn't find them or remember their names and i'm scared they've been taken down. ah the pain of being in an old, less active fandom...

i also write fics too! ive only written aus so far (incidentally, not on purpose), but the angstiest is probably all things rancid and delicate, which is about mikan in a cult (it has a lot of dark elements to it)

im sorry if youre not much an au person, but i havent read much new ga ffn recently and not many good ones have survived the test of time it seems. it's all very sad. i miss reading fanfic all the time AND having lowered standards for gaffn specifically...

i hope i've answered your questions! if you have any other questions feel free to shoot me another ask! i love talking abt ga <3

#sorry i took a while to reply. i wanted to take some time to gather fics but i ended up falling short anyway! #answered #kitwatson #gakuen alice #ga #fic recs #im sure i have more ga recs but i focused on angst... idk. it was an attempt for sure

[minalblood]

Episode 8, here we go! Finally! Im dedicating this review to @noybusiness and @shallowseeker for the encouragements to return to this.

Oh yes, Loki/Gabe! I forgot that's this one. I will say I still could not tell you which one it is. I WILL try to figure that out by the end of this.

I appreciate Mary immediately going to wanting to punch her dad while he's unconscious. Top tier sentiments.

I love (read: am banging my head against a wall) that John thinks what happened last ep counts as having hit the Akrida "pretty hard". It's kinda laughable tbh. The Akrida have already shown extrmely adept at infiltration (basically their whole thing) as well as the whole swarm of locust vibes associated. What i mean by this is, they have no clue how many Akrida there are or where and the dozen or so Samuel got rid of could easily be such an expendable number. But John assumes they weren't... why? Based on what? I also highkey love that Carlos just fully skirts addressing John's remark here and instead refocuses on the case du jour while Lata and Mary also say nothing. It's just funny to me.

Yessss, Lata and Carlos team up!!!

Ughh Dean's talking about dreams and sacrifices, just rip my heart out why dont u? Tho I will highlight his words about gaining more than u lose, Ive always appreciated the fact that Dean prefers to focus on what he has if possible. And it's not like he doesn't have a plethora of regrets, but he has reached a point by like.. season 11/12 I'd say where he became content with himself enough not to wish it different. I also deeply love the acknowledgement of said sacrifices made, it's not this empty optimistic view of things, shit has been bad before, but that doesn't negate or dimish the good that you've also gotten/found.

Lata's absolute judgement and unimpresed reaction to what Carlos has just called a "cathedral" give me life. This ep I think is one where we really start to see some more contrast in Lata. Because up until now, she's certainly been there, has def had complexity, but now we're not just seeing her be excited about knowledge, but rather learn some of the minutiae of her personality. Like how she is not easily impressed and also her niche interests and Carlos' dont match. We've seen Carlos be interested in her hobbies before, begrudgingly and with vague horrified expressions, but intrigued nonetheless. The opposite, we can now see for sure, does not apply in reverse for Lata. She genuinely doesn't seem to give a shit about the supposed prestige of the Knave and is more than happy to fall back to what she enjoys.

I adore the bartender. He is my fav and I am endlessly mad he dies. I loved that man and his "leave me.tf alone kid" vibes.

Carlos not wanting Lata to know about Rivers Gemini is soo funny. And 100% reminds me of Dean and how he prefers to hide his interests so he isn't made fun of/keeps appearences. And this won't be the only Carloa Dean parallel this ep. Hell, Dean's intro words apply most to Carlos this ep as is.

I love the fact that Mary and John actually TALK about their relationship and boundaries and the kiss. The emotional maturity is astounding tbh.

Jericho immediately making his excuses for why he hadn't seen Brock when he died gave me apprehension when I 1st watched this ep live, but now it's very obvious he was preemptively giving his alibi. It's honestly subtly done especially when contrasted to how obvious Loki/Gabe are. Glorious mustache on him btw.

Carlos has a very... interesting view on hunting. Because on the one hand, it did kinda kill their dream of being a musician, but they alao very much approach hunting with a lot of enthusiasm and genuinely seem to enjoy it. Again, the Dean vibes are off the charts with this one. I love Lata for adressing and checking in with Carlos as well, just making sure they're ok.

The roadie/Loki/Gabe is also pretty obvious in hindsight. It makes little sense to have this dude just go fuck off but oh no actually lemme tell u exactly what u need.

Oh no, Millie and Samuel. I am not ready for this. They are so similar and so different at the same time. Mainly because I genuinely believe Millie by this point has had the chance to process part of her issues whereas Samuel very much so is ... Samuel. And you can see this plainly for both of them. They are similiar, they butt heads because of it, but Millie has spent all this episode giving both John and Mary the space they need to work their shit out, without making any of her usual comments except for the tea Ada gave Samuel and even then she's quick to retract her statement when the tea works. Samuel meanwhile spends a good chunk of the episode saying shit that only serves to diminish or undermine.

I do appreciate the confirmation that Samuel knew who the MoL are/were. It makes perfect sense for the Campbell's to know considering their hunting legacy. And it's endlessly funny thay both him and Henry (when he met Sam and Dean) put down the other's profession. It's a fun parallel (i hate it). Millie putting him in his place was very very satisfying for me.

I will forever be screaming about Chuck being front and centre in this episode several times. An episode where we have Loki/Gabe and is about music (Chucks already said music is where humanity popped off for him) and on top of that discusses the themes of making up ur life as you want it despite whatever fate decrees (aka hunting means sacrifice and death but Carlos get to perform on the best stage in the area in from.of their friends regardless). Not to mention that I constantly have Chuck saying he likes "front row seats" and "hiding out in plain sight" on a loop in my head. Like of course he'd be keeping an eye out for his faves or would've done so before he was defeated. The timeline's a bit messy here because either this version is no longer the Chuck that Sam and Dean fought and defeated and is essentially the leftover consciousness from this particular world or time happens sorta simultaneoualy? I lean toward the 1st tbh, but then the question still remains of how much does he know. It's very very incriminating that he is in fact there.

And all this to say that I cannot believe that we have Loki alone here. I don't see it, can't. It makes more sense to me to actively mess with the Campbell-Winchester bloodlines via fucking with their friends while giving a speech about playing ur part for Gabe. But then... it ain't like Loki's mythos don't also deal with themes of predestination... soo...

And it's so so obvious that Loki/Gabe is gunning directly for Carlos btw. Like so obvious.

The bartender deserved better and I will go down with this.

Yep, that tattoo is def a parallel to the Mark of Cain. Which again, interesting choice 🤔

I love Mary's no nonsense vibe with Samuel, especially when he's trying to fuck around and find out aka deflecting the bullshit he's been pulling.

The photossssss, yesss.

I need John Winchester to not say shit like "should treat her more like a daughter less like a soldier' because I will have a stroke. I am so so in agreement and applauding but simultaneously thinking how fucking rich it is that this comes from any version of him. I am.in paaain. I wanna kill SPN!John with my bare hands and hearing this John say shit like this only adds fuel to the fire.

Ah yes... the innuendo. Forgot bout that. More on it, the personality Loki/Gabe shows here matches Gabe wayyyyy more than Loki, but the outfit and earlier peronality matches Loki. Cannot speak to MO since that's fully dif fron SPN, no just deserts here. Just a very bitter demigod/archangel. I am starting to think they are actively working together here and are both present and fucking around. He really really hates Lata tho. Like he's gunning for Carlos, but actively scorns Lata. Interesting.

Also also the disappearing Jericho thing... yes Loki could, but we've most seen in with Chuck and Lucifer, so I fully believe that the version that gets Carlos to make a deal is heavily leaning towards Gabe moreso than Loki.

Maggie's books save the day once more. God Maggie could've been a glorious Woman of Letters (to quite Charlie) in another life.

Uuuuuh Samuel seeing how things have changes, yess. Makes sense of course he's the one who's literally been on the outside and not being influenced by the Dean meddling til now so he still relates everything to what used to be true of the people we've been watching. But they aren't the same anymore, shit's changed and they've changed. This is what I've been trying ro highlight as it's been happening these past 8 ep that led us to Samuel confirming it.

At least he's self aware hes not a people's person. I do appreciate the distinction between monsters that kill to survive vs those that kill for fun. (And I am once more wondering if I should just post my bachelor's on the nature of monsters in spn)

Winchesters and their family specials... Aaaand I just realized they SPN!John likely had made his moms recipe for Sam and Dean when they were sick... think Dean called it cure-all kitchen-sink stew? If I remember my spn correctly...

Uuuu it was Samuel who mentioned the weapon...not Lata as Loki/Gabe accuses and mocks.

I love the arguememt between Mary and Samuel. And am mad that Samuel actually shows more emotional maturity in explaning himself here than SPN!John every did... I feel like I'm chewing glass here fellas, pray for me. Wonderful self awareness actually, love the clear generational trauma "dont want you to hate me like I hated him" indeed Samuel. Aaaand he's pulling a SPN!Mary move of rationalising his being away and distant and working on his own while his kid worries and fights the same fight by saying he's doing it for her...

So Samuel is Spn!Mary and is fueled technically by the guilt of what his choices have wroth his child. And Millie is son!John and is fueled by the grief and rage of having lost her husband to the supernatural and is reflecting it onto on her kid.

But... vitally, both are trying to fix shit and are given the space/time to do so.

Fun fighting sequence.

The bait and switch is a Loki/Gabe classic.

The Samuel stabing his daughter... oooof. Not left handed??? That's what u based it on, you absolute moron! I agree with Loki/Gabe mocking Samuel here tbh.

I will say the personality has shifted a bit after the bait and switch. The version of Loki/Gabe is now simmering with barely contained anger and is far more serious in his comments. There's more bite to them. I do believe thats more Loki leaning.

"For someone your height, you're very loud" was a helluva projection for Loki/Gabe.

I adore how Carlos breaks the rules here. And it's based in the sacrifice of hunting, but it's not because of it per se. And in doing the selfless thing, impulsively I'd even say, he broke the deal/curse. Ah... the free will of it all.

It's a very interesting arguement that Loki/Gabe gives here about humanity. Could fit either really.

Lata's mild sadistic pleasure about annoying Loki/Gabe, my beloved.

Awwwwww, they're familyyyy

I still like the Millie and Samuel dynamic. It's kind ... juicy with trauma in such a specific way.

At least now Samuel tells Mary where he's going, rather than just taking off like an asshole.

Calling Samuel, Sam... oh John, you disaster of a person, I kinda love you.

Carlos being fully behind forgiving Jericho, lovely. And omg Jericho is basically Lee here, isn't he? Is that a stretch??

Uhhhh such a gorgeous fucking voice.

Fucking Chuck still there tho and it gives me anxiety even tho I know how this ends.

I do like seeing everyone during the song montage, love the forward movement of it. The future it sorta aludes to. And Mary deciding to go on with her and John's relationship only adds to this sentiment.

Aaaanddd Dean MOTHERFUCKING Winchester has join the chat. I remember that moment when I 1st watched this... on his bday. Such a great time seeing this live tbh and it still is a hell of a reveal now too.

See y'all next time where we'll be diving into my still unresolved trauma of the spn finale, vampires (my beloveds), the Ursitoare and how annoyed I am constantly about the pronunciation of most Romanian in English shows and much more!

#spnwin #spnwin rewatch #spnwin 1x08 #lata dar #carlos cervantez #mary campbell #john winchester #millie winchester #samuel campbell

[devilsainz]

Tagged by @watercolor-hearts, I'm actually surprised someone remembers my @ to tag me in these! quite heartwarming tbh, thank you lovely, hope you have a nice day/evening/morning 🤗💙

Name: my true name starts with a. m. but since i'm a person on the verge of mixing reality w/ virtual i rather be just called goggles lmao (not to be too vague, my second one is miguel, a quite common latino name, but the first one is quite unusual and it feels too real to be called like that so im hiding it lol)

Sign: Leo (i copied from the op who tagged me and yes this is my sign as well)

Time: 19:16 (i definetely spent too much time elaborating and correcting my own answers lmao)

Favourite band/artist: the short version or the long one? cause honestly im kind of into music as a whole, but to select just a few, i'd say Fiona Apple, Joanna Newsom, Beyoncé and Björk. yep, all ladies, dont ask me why but i just connect with female vocalists more

Last movie: ooh.. this one is quite been some time actually... i think it was Knives Out: Glass Onion! just a little bit of silly fun entertainment and cause i was honestly curious cause i liked watching the 1st knives out.

Last show: Drive to survive 🤷‍♂️ im not a very series person tbh (even dts i only watched the eps i actually was curious about lmao)

When I created this blog: this kind of has 2 answers idk. because this used to be a ziam - yes you read that right - a ziam blog lmao but i didnt put much thought into it tho. then i just stopped using for years, and i just came 2 months ago back to delete it and replace with this actual blog cause i discovered the charlos side of tumblr and wanted to interact w the blogs i discoveeed, reblog and all that jazz.

Other blogs: other than the one i deleted, no, i just have this active blog.

Do I get asks: no i turned them off lol but i dont mind actually i get kind of peaceful thinking im just a dot in this vast virtual world of internet, at least here

Followers: 125 accs (i guess, i dont check bots but i dont think there are too much of them)

Average hours of sleep: i guess it varies on 6-8? there are days a sleep a little bit later but tbh i dont keep track of these lol but i can tell i've been pretty okay with my schedule lately, at least my insomnia stopped

Instruments: nope. i have a shitty keyboard but i just gave up on learning, but i do plan on trying again, just dont know when

What I am wearing: green shorts and an ugly printed but comfortable t shirt

Dream job: i mean, it says dream job... so i might go full in... singer/songwriter 🤓

Dream trip: actually i'm not really obsessed about trips anymore... but if i had to pick one i'm just saying Madrid cause its where carlos jr was born 🤓 (i still want to go there and investigate in person to find his official time of birth btw, so yep im picking madrid)

Favorite song atm: i have a lot of songs being my faves simultaneously and it changes fast depending on the moments/moods but im going with In California by Joanna Newsom cause the chorus when she sings "cuckoo cuckoo" its freaking amazing tbh. for my more upbeat side tho i'm picking Those Eyes, That Mouth by cocteau twins.

Tagging:@leclercsbf and @leoramage (tagging you two cause you were the ones to start a conversation w me so i think it wouldn't be too awkward lol but hey, feel free to ignore if you dont want to or dont like these, no hard feelings, were just dots in a virtual space)

(ps: i was actually very defensive about these kind of posts but i tried this one for fun and hey it is fun! it was kind of cool to talk about myself freely without my face or name plastered on it so thanks for that, person who tagged me)

#do i even tag this (lmao) #ramblings

[bathboysblog]

im so normal about this au. so normal, in fact, that i wanted to draw Sugarplum in it. mob au, Doc and Robbie all belong to @clownsuu!

Sugarplum isnt built for the mob life lol. shes an aquatic predator, sure, but she has a strong hate for guns and firearms. theyre loud, hot, and bust out her eardrums. which is ironic, considering shes best friends with Robbie.

but anyhow, some lore! remember when i said in these old ass hcs that Sugarplum's body has a cleaner in it (since she lives in large bodies of water), making sure her cotton insides dont get moldy? and how that translates into a paralyzing venom? well, because of that, she pairs up with Doctor Stone and Robbie! Wally wants Doc to look more into the venom to see if they can make a new drug out of it, one that only their mob would have access to. basically monopolizing on it, selling it for high prices in small amounts. if not that, then at least Julie will have a new poison to play around with. since Sugarplum cant fight in the mob, shes basically a lab rat (that Stone has almost lost some fingers to for being snappy).

and a note on the placements of Sugarplum's scars: she has her stitches across her jaw and wrists. she tried to fight back with her sharp teeth/claws, and it didnt go too well. she also lost stinger privileges on the puffy skirt (both for shocking people and being impractical indoors), so she only has the base of her outfit in this au. ALSO also, Sugarplum doesnt have eyelids here either! during the fight (and her eye being ripped out), there was a lot of painful tears, and the skin of her eyelid burned out from the venom. she has just enough skin to keep the eyeball in, and by some miracle (cough cough Home), she hasnt gone blind.

since ive come to learn that Tumblr doesnt like long posts, this one will be for the relationship chart rant. hopefully, if art block doesnt FUCK me, ill post some doodles of her!

Sugarplum -> Robbie: ill admit, this entire idea came from me talking to this fan made ai. i thought the two would hate each other, but their relationship was surprisingly cute? Sugarplum is still learning social behaviors and speech, which lead to some funny moments between the two, shown below (i changed 'chipmunk' to 'shrimp' because, yk, aquatic puppet).

they mean everything to me.

but anyways.

Sugarplum admires Robbie and the kinship they have. she doesnt know much about money, or drugs, or the mob in general. and even if Robbie is... not the best person to take after, Sugarplum still looks up to him. she thinks hes really good at making jokes (something shes still learning to do), is very cool for going out and doing 'mob business', and probably thinks he knows a lot more than he actually does (she takes a lot of his bragging at face value). Sugarplum has very vague contact to the main mob, so its mostly her and Robbie bugging the Doc. shes slightly afraid of his strength, or when he gets too rowdy. but one nip from her teeth and hes out like a light (the only time the base is peaceful).

Robbie -> Sugarplum: the base isnt so lonely anymore! he took Sugarplum under his wing, and took it upon himself to teach her the wonders of society! he thinks her blunt jokes are so bad, theyre funny, and her constant questions makes him feel really smart. Robbie wishes she would leave the base to see him in action, so he could really show off! still, he has respect for her dealing with all the lab tests Stone does, and is slightly afraid of her creepy nature (the venom in her gums doesnt help either). a small part of him is weary of her loyalty to the mob from how cold she is towards Sally and Barnaby, but he tries to ignore it for the sake of having a friend. and also, since i have no self control, he has a slight puppy crush for her. its mostly due to all of her praise and the attention she gives him, but Robbie also finds Sugarplum to be generally sweet, if not a bit weird. theyre def besties though.

Sugarplum -> Doctor Stone: mean old man!!! Sugarplum doesnt like him, and thinks hes far too grumpy to be any pleasant company. he must have a very miserable and sad life. they tolerate one another though, since they have to work together in order to run tests on her venom (neither of them want to fuck around and find out with Wally). she tries to ask him questions like she does with Robbie, but he gets too snappy. so Sugarplum gets snappy back! with her teeth! safe to say, they both tone it down around one another.

Doctor Stone -> Sugarplum: sees her as a feral animal with rabies. a raccoon that youre watching in your trashcan, that youre pretty sure is foaming at the mouth, but your too scared to say 'shoo!' he does have a smudge of respect for her, since shes quiet and complies with instructions, but other than that, he sicks her onto Robbie. he does have an interest in her venom though, which is why he hasnt complained to Wally to have her transferred. their interactions are very straight forward. the tests are ran in silence, and theyd much rather be doing other things than spending time with one another.

Sugarplum -> Home: Sugarplum used to live in the wild, so she has a sixth sense for danger, which includes when a larger predator is stalking her. shes very aware that somethings watching, that theres something unnatural about the mobs loyalty and their power. she just doesnt know where its coming from. the most shes interacted with Home is hissing to the air for him to go away, but thats it. if they ever did meet, she would be feral. Sugarplum doesnt fear death, and she refuses to submit to anyones control. shes given him the nickname of 'leech' for his eyes constantly sticking around her.

Home -> Sugarplum: i have this base hc with any of their interactions that something went wrong when creating Sugarplum, and thats why shes so animalistic. Home sees her as a failure of creature, one that needed a bit more time in the oven to be complete. her awareness is concerning, and he makes sure to keep an extra close eye on her to make sure she doesnt go snooping (like Frank cough cough). the second she gets bold, her memory gets wiped. he keeps her with Stone and Rob to make sure she doesnt rub off on the rest of the mob. (spspspsp, i also made a Mob Home ai that you can talk to here, for anyone thats interested)

Sugarplum -> Frank: she had a bad opinion on him first, seeing him as a mini Stone, and for the longest time, she avoided him. but since she and Stone work so close together, Frank got desperate and nearly begged her to talk to Stone for him. that was a turning point in their relationship, and the more they spoke, the more she saw that they were fighting for the same cause. Sugarplum is afraid of breaking the rules, but she does make Stones job harder by being stubborn if he ignores Frank. she holds a high respect for Frank, and wishes him the best as he looks for answers. secretly, she hopes he gets a breakthrough, no matter what the cost may be.

Frank -> Sugarplum: again, for the longest time, their only connection to one another was Doc. Doc spoke about Sugarplum like she was an animal, and Frank thought she was a more feral version of Sally. but, when he had nowhere else to turn, when Doc ignored him and he hit a dead end, the two met in person. Frank thinks that Sugarplum is one of the few people who can sway Doc's opinions (since the two have to work together. if Sugarplum doesnt comply, shes going to drag both of them under Wally's wrath). Frank wishes Sugarplum would help him (he could sure use the support), but understands her hesitance. still, hes very thankful for the help she provides behind the scenes. he also finds her to be generally creepy, but tries to take the time out of his day to correct whatever Robbie has 'taught' her ('and you believed that moron?').

Sugarplum -> Julie: mixed emotions. Sugarplum does like Julie's presence. shes a very optimistic and excitable person, which easily rubs off on Sugarplum. but, Sugarplum is very distrusting of modern medicine, especially since Julie proudly displays her obsession with poisons. because of that distrust, Sugarplum keeps her distance. Sugarplum sees her as a poisonous bug you cant let touch you.

Julie -> Sugarplum: wants her venom soooo bad. why does Stone get to have all of the fun! if Julie had a weekend with Sugarplum, she could make a new drug in no time! Julie does find Sugarplum to be a bit creepy at times, but she always scurries away before Julie can get the needle out! rats :/

Sugarplum -> Howdy: is very uncomfortable around him. she thinks something is VERY wrong with Howdy from how much of a mindless servant he is, and sees him as a walking zombie (the gore movies Robbie shows her doesnt help much). Howdy freaks her out, and she doesnt see him as a living person. when they visit the mob, her time is mostly spent with Poppy while Robbie sticks to the bar.

Howdy -> Sugarplum: doesnt have much of an opinion on her. shes a quiet girl, awfully squeamish, and she isnt at the bar long enough for them to have any real interactions. he does have a small drop of pity that she has to deal with Robbie all day, though, other than that, he doesnt have much to say.

Sugarplum -> Wally: a mix of terror and discomfort. Wally always has an ulterior motive behind his words, he always has a plan and can read people like an open book. Sugarplum cant keep up with it all, and she finds their interactions to be very stressful. Wally is the main reason that shes afraid to rebel against the mob, and she may have villainized Wally more than their interactions had warranted. she has a longing to be back with nature, but doesnt want to give her family in the mob up. shes terrified of Wally finding out, and the fact that she doesnt know what he knows only adds onto the paranoia.

Wally -> Sugarplum: lends a lot of trust to Sugarplum. not because shes earned it (like Howdy), but because shes so easy to read, he isnt worried about her rebelling. Sugarplum is well behaved, polite, and easily scared back into place. he sees her more as a mouse than a predator, and doesnt understand why Home watches her so closely. Wally just doesnt like how Frank and her have become buddy-buddy. and YES, there is a SPECK of pink (theyre my main ship in og canon, i had to). wrapping back to the hc of 'Sugarplum needs more time in the oven', Wally sees her as a more... aware being, than the rest of the mob. she isnt bold enough to be a threat, but just enough to stand out. the pink isnt so much 'love' as it is 'interest'. he thinks Home has a higher purpose for her, which is why hes so weary of Frank and Sugarplums kinship. he also misinterprets Sugarplum's honesty as friendship, and thinks the two of them are good friends.

Sugarplum -> Barnaby: doesnt dislike him as much as Sally, but Barn isnt even close to the friendship her and Robbie have. she doesnt like how gun happy Barnaby is, nor the strong smell of his cigs. he overwhelms a lot of her senses, and hes very pushy. two and two dont mix, so she avoids him. thankfully, Barnaby is more excited to see Robbie than he is Sugarplum, letting her slip away.

Barnaby -> Sugarplum: has Wally's view of seeing her as a mouse, and thinks the girl should live a little! come on, guns aint so bad! fire-crackers are bright and colorful, theyre exciting! he doesnt get how Robbie and Sugarplum are so close, and finds her to be pretty boring. hes more excited to see Robbie, which keeps him distracted. if anything, Barn finds her creepy, and since shes so nip happy, he doesnt push her. he doesnt know what the venom does, and if Wally's interested in it, doesnt want to find out either.

Sugarplum -> Sally: hates Sally. not as much as she hates Home, but she refuses to meet with her when they visit the mob. Sally is erratic, loud, and too much of a loose screw for Sugarplum to handle. shes the most energetic, and the most overwhelming. it also doesnt help that shes so... bright, like a sun. the sounds of explosives terrify Sugarplum, and Sally is too impulsive for her to feel safe around. Robbie, you deal with it.

Sally -> Sugarplum: thinks Sugarplum is too prissy! come on, Wally aint gonna shoot you dead if you break a few rules! have some fun, live a little, join their trio! but, no matter how hard Sally looks around the base, Sugarplum is nowhere to be seen. so, she shrugs her shoulders, and goes to hang out with Robbie instead. when the two are forced to be around each other, its very tense. Sugarplum glares at her a lot, a 'dont try anything' stare, which is a bit unerring. she also shares Barnaby's fears of the venom, not knowing anything about how it works. maybe just a bit more, since Sugarplum is so standoffish around her.

Sugarplum -> Eddie: doesnt have much of an opinion on Eddie. their exchanges are brief and friendly. hes the most normal of the mob members, something Sugarplum appreciates, and hes a very caring person. but, just like Howdy, theres that underlying discomfort nagging at the pit of Sugarplums stomach. shes friendly, but wont go out of her way to talk to Eddie. shes mostly there to sign for Doc's pick-ups. though, for the sake of Frank's sanity, she keeps a close eye on him when he does visit the base, just to keep him safe.

Eddie -> Sugarplum: shes... well, creepy. Sugarplum creeps him out. she has a staring problem, her voice is flat and monotone, and her wide eyes dont help. but, Sugarplum refuses to be around Sally, and Sally takes the short time to say hi to Robbie. so, Eddie sucks it up, and tries to be as friendly as he can. and hey, he hasnt lost a finger yet! he must be doing something right. Sugarplum also follows him a lot whenever he visits the base, but thats fine! this is fine!

Sugarplum -> Poppy: doesnt know it, but Sugarplum has a MAJOR crush on Poppy. even if Poppy doesnt act like it, Sugarplum feels a sense of belonging from the two being animals. Sugarplum admires how gentle and nurturing Poppy is, and tries her best to look small around her, trying not to scare her. she wishes Poppy wouldnt stress so much, and wishes they saw each other more often. Sugarplum leaves little trinkets in front of Poppy's door when she doesnt answer, like pebbles or coins. birds like those, right?

Poppy -> Sugarplum: very nervous around Sugarplum. Sugarplum is a predator, and its hard to ignore her sharp teeth and glowing fangs. shes very scared for Sugarplum to touch her without heavy gloves, but appreciates the room Sugarplum gives for her to breathe. the little gifts make her feel seen, and she often sews the rips in Sugarplums clothes from her claws. the two find comfortable peace in one another. but, sadly, it never lasts long.

thank you for listening to my goober rants! a gift for those who have scrolled this far!

#my art #welcome home #welcome home oc #oc #mob au #Sugarplum #im not tagging all of the characters id rather suck on a lemon #everything for this au is just wrapped under 'mob au' #but Robbie has my whole heart #Sugarplum couldnt see on top of a supply shelf #and she was curious about what was up there #so Robbie ai put her on his shoulders??? #my heart??? #'this is a weird looking chipmunk #but its MY weird looking chipmunk' #Rob also has a lot of bite marks because of Sugarplum #she nibbles to show affection #which gives him a quick nap! #clownsuu #this is barley edited take pity upon me

[maternal-extinct]

Thank you Ma'am. I understand needing time to answer questions ^_^ Anyways... I know you're more on the cg side but maybe you (or maybe one of your littles) will have some advice. So, my Mama and I have super different schedules. By the time she's done with work I'm early in my shift and by the time I get done she's in bed. We also have our own other partners that also need time from us so it's hard to find time to see each other very often. This wasn't and issue because we only lived a few blocks from each other so I could still see her for a bit at least once a week, but now she's a 45 minute drive away (and I can't drive) so with that and scheduling issues I feel like I rarely get to spend time with her. Admittedly I've become pretty dependent on her presence in my life and it's affecting my mental health pretty badly, but I don't wanna put more pressure her. Any advice on coping with sparse time with a caregiver?

P.S. Sorry for the wall of text. I tend to ramble.

- Anonymous Fox

thank you for writing in sweetpea.

a big part of CGl, kink, or polyamory in general is negotiating and discussing needs, feelings, expectations, and boundaries and doing it kinda often. critters and theyre lives are super fluid so its always a good idea to discuss how things should be effected by changes cus changes happen frequently. it sounds like your mommy moving away was a change that had an effect on your relationship and moods in a big way, and without some communication those big changes just end up being managed internally for each of yall. it seems like a good time to broach those topics

here is a really helpful polyam framework for having big discussions if it feels like the kind of thing that warrants a big discussion.

now, like. as an personal perspective, most critters get into being a mom cus taking care of others can feel good. it can feel good to be helpful and to soothe others big emotions! i dont know who your mommy is but like, i can guess she loves you a lot and wants to help you. even if you feel like a burden for reaching out, she probably wants to know how youre feeling and what can be done to help you. a big part of communicating boundaries and expectations is learning what you can and cant do in concrete terms! being afraid of being a burden creates a lot of vaguity and imaginations and emotions can run wild in vague situations, so knowing what is and isnt burdensome will help avert that fear!

i hope that makes sense, if you need more advice im always happy to help, sweetpea! 💕