twitter tweet twats #14
characters by @blackholly and @stephanie_garber
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Jacks, pretending to be Evangeline: Dear Diary, a chipmunk asked me for my name today. I told him it was Joe. I lied. That will haunt me forever.
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Jacks: How would you like your coffee?
Evangeline: As dark as my soul.
Jacks: Got it, one cup of milk coming right up!
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Evangeline: Just so you know, if you go to prison, Jacks...I will not wait for you.
Jacks: You won't have to. I'll escape. We both know that.
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Apollo: You're horrible. How do you even sleep at night??
Jacks: With your wife, actually.
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evangeline: ...jacks, why are you up it's 4:00 in the morning-
jacks: there is no rest for the wicked.
chaos: he's organizing his apples by color.
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OUABH series in a modern au.
(Evangeline's version)
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Eva@Jacks:
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Tella: Why does Jacks look like he's about to cry?
Evangeline: He took a quiz for "Which Character are you from Caraval?"
Tella: And who did he get?
Legend: Me.
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Why are they like this...
Me: You guys are in love with each other.
Jacks: She is nothing but a tool to me.
Evangeline: I hate him. He's a manipulative apple-eating demon.
Me: hmm...
Jacks and Evangeline:*constantly flirting with each other 24/7, saving each other's ass all the time, saying frickin' phrases like "There is nothing of equal value to me", practically sobbing their eyes out if the other breaks their heart*
Me:*freaking out over why these two do stuff like this to me and being frickin' exasperated and annoyed why they are like this* HMM...
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Evangeline: Jacks, remember when you said you weren’t going to interfere with my love life?
Jacks: No, that doesn’t sound like me at all.
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twitter tweety twats #23 - OUABH / TFOTA
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Evangeline: *almost dies for the 10000th time*
Jacks: I don’t care.
Narrator: But Jacks in fact did care.
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Jacks: *mixing different alcoholic beverages together*
Evangeline: What are you making?
Jacks: A mistake.
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Evangeline: Good job. [Puts a sticker on Jacks’ shirt]
Jacks: You're giving me a sticker?
Evangeline: Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying "Me-wow!"
Jacks: I'm not a preschooler.
Evangeline: Fine, I'll take it back–
Jacks: I earned this! Back off!
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LaLa: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Jacks: Oh yeah? You’re the bitch who thinks you can get away with EVERYTHING you do!
LaLa: I’m leaving, and I’M TAKING EVANGELINE WITH ME.
Jacks: I'D LOVE TO SEE YOU TRY-
Evangeline, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.
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