#it has to be me doing this alone 😔

[im-still-watching-anime]

*naruto and sasuke arguing*

sasuke: well at least sakura offered to come with me when i left, you just tried to fight me

naruto: oh what I’M the team freak for not wanting to willingly go live with orochimaru?

sasuke: ……..touché

#naruto #naruto shippuden #naruto incorrect quotes #naruto team 7 #uchiha sasuke #uzumaki naruto #haruno sakura #i think sakura would have lasted less than an hour before trying to murder orochimaru with her fists #even at 12 years old pre-tsunade training i believe she would have won from sheer spite alone #i do love that naruto never tried to go though #tfw the love of ur life and soulmate goes where you can’t follow😔 #(living with that nasty ass snake guy) #also srry if i seem offline work has been making me want to bite and attack everything on earth #so i spend all my free time sleeping now so i Do Not Do That

[tradingjackbs]

Attempted to do a photoshoot for the one and only cosplay I'll probably ever do and. These are the only pictures I got that matter

#there were a lot of blurrier ones that were completely incomprehensible lmao #i did also get some decent serious ones but. idk if i'll post them/might save them for halloween or something. we'll see #i dont like taking pics of myself and i dont like sharing my face on the internet. it just so happens this particular character has bangs #and also sunglasses so it works out #nicholas d wolfwood #cosplay #trigun #rosie posting #cats of tumblr #i love my girl so so much. but lord she love gettin all in my business when im tryna do shit ykwim #taking pictures or drawing or whatever tf. it dont matter. she must be in the way <3 #i went to put my clothes away and like. sure it's a relatively cheap suit but it still cost a good amount #and this goddamn cat is swiping and pouncing on my clothes as im tryna put em away like 😭😭😭😭 GIRL #anyway pretend ww has uhh curly hair. and literally no jawline. and also a normal/fat waist. and a thick ass neck jesus lordt #that's what my ww looks like <3 sowwy that's just how im built lmao #oh and the wrong nose. i have the wrong nose for every anime character 😔 #bitch ass half white half pinoy got me out here lookin like a gotdamned Freak lol <3 #the absurd amount of cookies in the past week probs hasnt been helping #i live alone and shit's hard yo 😭😭 #this also means i took all my goddamn photos myself and thus. the excessive cat bombing <3

[spotsupstuff]

After thinking about the “kind ancient” ask, I can just imagine Zephyr wondering why some of their* systems are suddenly working better, then hearing a very loud and angry “VOID BELOW, THESE WIRES ARE IN THE COMPLETE WRONG PLACES! DID THESE ANCIENTS NOT KNOW HOW TO MAKE A FUNCTIONAL ITERATOR?!”

(*I am using they/them pronouns because I am not good at remembering things like that, so I am not sure what pronouns to use, sorry if you want me to use different ones!)

(you're good, i understand! Zeph's a she/her!)

that whole scenario is just

for her

she gon call up Boreas to send in some overseers to zap this stranger outta her, like yea, neat, nice that the systems r better on it but god she feels violated

#Spot says stuff #rw #zephs just. 'mmmhgr'. not here to make friends #it has been a thought in me head for a good while that some ancients that live close enough- the teens of that place sometimes come to her- #-structure cuz you know how a good match teenagers and abandoned buildings are. idk if its still canon since the whole 'zephs kept a- #-secret from the public has been introduced' but whenever she managed to pick up a presence of an ancient by whatever miracle shed let her- #-catastrophe of a wailing broken siren go off to scare them away. the broken structure gets the reputation of being haunted and she gets- #-to be largely alone. if a person doesn't first go through her Anemoi group she aint gon wanna do anythin with em 😔

[daz4i]

uh oh i think my laptop's officially dead

#i really hope not. but. the keyboard stopped working suddenly 😭 #idk maybe i turned smth off accidentally?? idk if that's even possible #I'm trying to restart it now but it's going. very slowly. which is also worrying #even holding the off button isn't doing anything. shit #it was so sudden too??? it was actually still working like i could use the mouse and it was playing music #this is so weird I'm so scared 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #it's like 5 years old man don't do this to me 😐😐😐😐😐😐😐 #update: well it's not turning off so i took the charger out and hope it dies from a lack of battery power soon #and then I'll plug it back in and see if it helps 😔 #i THINK it happened before?? like that it didn't turn off and i had to wait for the battery to drain first #I'm so worried i really hope it doesn't die 😔 it'll break me mentally i fear. #(yes it's an object but like. i need it man. and it has a lot of my stuff there. and a lot of distractions from the fact I'm alive) #bro why is this taking so long #usually when i use my laptop and it's not actively being charged it dies within 5 minutes #it's been over 10 now and it's still going?? now?? when i actually WANT it to die?? #:/ think I'm gonna leave it alone for now hhhhh whatever. I'm very anxious but there's not much i can do besides waiting anyway

[todayisafridaynight]

Kashiwagi has this kind of scowl on his face 24/7 while he's in the yakuza (Y0-Y3), but in Y7 the bartender has a lot more relaxed base expression. Bro didn't have a resting bitch face after all, he just needed glasses this entire time.

bro he got big ass frames he's just hiding the scowl

#snap chats #thats what glasses will do to ye it'll hide yer brows... #also hi everyone. i should not be awake let alone alive right now you can stop reading im just gonna ramble bout my night now #im grateful i did not post much last night for im scared of what my brain would have posted while it was on autopilot #my brothers in christ i was trying to watch the booze off like i just put on one of my fave movies and all that ya #so who wanna fuckin tell me why i got teleported to me room with my laptop on my bed with twitter open #that shit has never happened to me. UTTERLY whimsied but also horrified #i didnt even make it an hour into the movie until i APPARENTLY just decided 'twitter time :)' #gonna finish watching it after breakfast but yeah anyways. not drinking again after this <3 #only downside to hanging with my peepaw is that he gets me to party with him 😔 wedding was fun at least :)

[synthetic-rust]

Kinda sad to think about, but I wonder if I’d have been more likely to get into engineering type stuff if sexism wasn’t a thing…

Like no one’s ever stopped me from doing things like that, but I’d still say to myself in my head that I would be out of place for doing it for whatever reason :[

It’s weird tho, cause in most other areas of life I don’t usually give a damn about gender expectations and all that, but in the subject of technology I still ended up feeling like It’s not something I should pursue.

Been trying to remove that kind of thinking from my head, but it’s hard sometimes. It gets a bit lonely feeling like an exception to things rather than being welcomed.

—

As a sort of extension to what I’m talking about, I’ve noticed that people like to say things that are progressive in one way or another, but then will still silently operate on principles that reflect the opposite (because of societal influence).

This isn’t something I’m exempt from, and no one truly is because of how social we are as a species, but I do wish more people were able to let themselves do without it and stop limiting themselves and others more often.

In that regard I still often feel lonely existing as a girl that doesn’t buy into the things we’re so often silently and not so silently pushed into doing. There are a lot of things that I feel some kind of pressure to participate in despite my disinterest. Mostly because I feel like I become more of an outsider within my gender for not doing them.

(Btw, I’m not exactly the most cis girl, but what I’m talking about here notably calls upon that kind of experience 👍)

#I hope this is coherent enough #mild vent? #vent #sexism #patriarchal society #girls in stem #chatter #very random topic for me to suddenly divulge but I feel like this is somewhat normal for my blog at this point #(._. ‘’) #I never did any engineering classes likely because of the reasons above #I know I’m not alone in thinking this #I was like 1 of maybe 2 or 3 girls in my stem classes #tho I did always find it odd that there was more of a gender balance with chemistry and biology but not physics? #cause it’s considered a harder subject maybe? #idk biology has had the ‘girl science’ label attached to it for a while whilst physics is probably the opposite #kinda cringe it’s that way tbh (to say the least) #why tf do we gender subjects (regretfully I know the answer) #computer science wasn’t any better #me and like the one other girl in the class 😔🤝

[guinevereslancelot]

i don't need anyone else to complete me but where is my soulmate already 😤

#this isnt funny anymoreeee #im totally content alone but come onnnn #please do not send me weird anons or messages of any kind bc of this post <3 #anyway i'm fulfilled alone i'm fulfilled alone i'm fulfilled alone #im fineeeee #i'm doing this wrong tho its december and i live in a christmas tree farm i'm supposed to already be a single parent #waiting for a lonely lawyer who has forgotten the true meaning of christmas and doesn't believe in santa #i skipped the crucial step of being widowed that's why i haven't found true love #i can't be the one w no time for romance bc i'm the christmas tree farmer there's a flaw in my hallmark movie plot that's why i'm alone #i was supposed to become a lawyer or a single parent but i'm neither 😔

[antimony-ore]

My roommate is mad I've been posting about Palestine and not him, so he came home from work today and decided to not let me use his car to go shopping or do anything important this week, shut off the wifi, and is following me around asking me to post about how shitty he is 👍👍👍

[robyn-goodfellowe]

everything has been so fast lately i need time to just stop for a little

#preferably on. 02:19. so i can sleep! thank you #really though it’s like i’ve been so busy i’ve no time to do anything For Me lately #everything has been like work. and school. and plans with my friends. and coursework and like ITS SO FUN but also #i have had no allotted robyn time and it’s starting to get to me i think . i haven’t written anything substantial in weeks if it #hasn’t been for class. and like again i’m having fun! i’m so excited for everything coming up and it’s nice to be so busy and productive #but also AAAAHHHH AAAAHHHH SOMETHING IS ALWAYS HAPPEBING #it’s like so hard to maintain like #school AND work AND social life AND online life AND me time #like one or two of them always ends up struggling #and again i’m having so much fun but 😫😫 i really just need to be alone for a day i think! and take it easy #but. idk. i’m also enjoying myself IM NOT COMPLAINING it’s just like wow i can’t remember the last time i took myself out somewhere nice to #write… i haven’t been to my favorite teahouse in a minute 😔 maybe next weekend. idk. i think i have stuff then too!!!! #rambling #also something bad happened and i ended up having to chop off a part of my hair #and i have been taking it as well as you’d expect (cannot handle unplanned change) #it’s so small you can’t even notice. BUT I CAN FEEL IT ABD ALSO IT MAKES ME SAD! ok goodnight

[tacagen]

erik alfred leslie satie you were the real one

#i mean that on all accounts. however. currently i am referring to the fact he dropped out of paris conservatoire twice #we both were too silly for the art music educational institutions 😔😔 #being into avant-garde ideas and some of the styles sucks. how tf i dont fit in BOTH art and pop music standards and expectations #composition class is a f-g nightmare when you are schizoid (not into any poetry and expressing 'feelings' no matter mine or someone else's) #my professor doesnt allow pieces without an Idea; a Picture that is Painted by Notes. more they dont even exist to her. #and then theres me. flat affected fucker who rarely has Ideas (and even if i do neither i want to nor can explain them) but often Neat #Sound Combinations. oh and also most of the conventional themes/ideas disgust me (see: 95% of poetry and songs being about l*ve) #sigh why cant i just magically be left alone to finally live my truth #the orientation to the listener and their basic ass perception while writing music and yk. expressing _yourself_ by it is so sickening

[risingsunresistance]

#jumpscare every single time jdjfhh #chat #why do i feel so much better today #*has a breakdown* *is very normal the next day* #normal is a stretch i havent eaten yet. sandwich time 👍 #i want like. real food. something warm... walking to the market alone is holding me back 😔

[what-aboutno]

Diluc fell first but Childe fell harder. In this essay I will-

#zara rambles #LISTEN #youre telling me diluc his heart is his greatest foe wouldn't fall for a harbinger despite everything #his heart betrays him another time making him feel conflicted about that man hmm?? #they honestly could be both but i like this version better sjdjd #childe whos just trying to fight the pretty bartender no feelings attached vrs diluc who fell in love with him after knowing him #sjsnhjdj but like childe has that like i am a weapon mindset and he definitely knows /who/ diluc is #and he seems quite lonely after you remove his family yk... along with the things saying he works alone #im just saying i like the idea of him not falling first and just having all these emotions hit him at once #if you follow me on twt and see i dont post there its because i don't like them 🫡 /lh sjdjd i like writing in tags to just ramble #cant do that on twt 😔😔 it also feels too public to share any thoughts that are just for rambling #idk if this made sense but i wanted to write it down somewhere thats not my notes sjdjd

[elysiumcalled]

Mum ate my crisps :(

#as much as I LOVE crisps I don’t eat them often at sll #I bought myself one bag of these Christmas ones for when I’m really craving them and mum ate them :( #well yesterday when I got up she went ‘I saved you half a bag of crisps’ of MY BAG LOL #then this morning she ate the rest :( #I didn’t eat them yesterday bc I wasn’t craving them she didn’t give me a chance bros :( #can’t even have CRISPS #loll #for context she’s a crisp fiend so always has crisps but she ran out and so went into the cupboard (where the crisps are normally NOT kept) #and ate my one pack #where’s ur SELF CONTROL #I’m not mad she ate my crisps btw lol and I literally would have shared them when I opened them #it’s that she can’t leave alone the ONE pack that I got for myself lol #do I have to keep them in my ROOM?! #can’t believe she would disrespect me and my crisps like that #btw that is absolutely a joke #still sad about my crisps tho 😔

[daz4i]

how is it. that for a whole week. the house smelled fine, and other than some dust and cat hair it was really clean too, and everything was organized and easy to find with no towers of dishes in the sink about to topple over. even tho i didn't clean that much or do anything out of the ordinary to keep the house this way. but now my parents have been home for like 3 days and already every room except for mine is inhospitable from how bad they all smell, and there's mess all over, and the table is constantly sticky, and the sink is somehow full yet barely has any dishes in it bc the way they're organized is so ineffective, and i hate it here i wanna leave so bad

#i know i probably can't run a place in the long term on my own. but. neither can they apparently!!!!! damn!!!!!!!! #idk if it's been getting worse recently or if my patience just runs thinner lately #the way they live is just incompatible with me and my needs really #ough ough ough i need to move out. I'm so scared. but it'll be good for me probably. #I'm just fantasizing abt a clean apartment. no sticky surfaces. no bad smells. mmmmm #vent #sorry i had to clean my brain out. it did help tho. i needed to complain abt this shit 😭 #today has been awful in part bc of that. the constant bad smells that stick to everything. the inability to do things when i need to #this shit makes me literally unable to function on even the most basic levels... like i didn't really eat or move much bc i felt so bad #i have an easier time when I'm alone. life becomes easier to handle when i can do it on my own terms #but I'm so scared 😔 and I'm stressed about the process of getting there too #maybe this is the reason I'm having stress nightmares these days idk. i need to send some files for that. but I'm too scared

[iero]

Anyway, headcount! Who’s gonna be at the Philly show?

#personal #I have an extra pit ticket for this show and my original floor seat I’m willing to let go of for dirt cheap if anyone is interested! #I’m just thinking about ditching work and still making this show LMAOOO. #I don’t know why I’m so bummed over potentially missing this show since I do have my FOUR other shows… #It’s probably a home state thing… #Anyway who’s gonna be in the pit and potentially wants to be friends? :) #If I’m going I’m gonna be alone and I… don’t like that. #My IRL friend who was supposed to be going with me now lives in AZ. 😅 #<- And I bought his pit ticket for him as an early birthday present two years ago. 😔 #The things I do for friends… #Anyway there’s 12.5k of you. One of you has to be going right?

[handcat]

my want for a relationship vs my refusal to try to acquire one FIGHT

#lonely boy hours 😔 #the way my brain works is i get obsessed with one person for several years #it inevitably leads to nothing and i get sad #repeat #like #I WANT TO LOVE AND BE LOVED WTF #it’s bc there’s something inherently wrong with me and you all can tell huh #tragic #also i occasionally consider dating apps but the problem is i don’t know those people #i don’t want to talk to them #leave me alone #i want to wake up tommorow and have been married for 5 years okay #i don’t want to go on a date i want.m #to die in your arms #also like everyone i know has had at least a couple relationships before and i’ve had ZERO #feel like i’m behind on shit and everyone knows more abt relationships than me and won’t ever like me hahahahahahhahahahHaahhaahh #and it’s not a wait till ur ready thing or whatevs bc i am a romantic person and that’s something i want in my life #i also hate vulnerability #i’m gonna smash me head into a wall #also ladies i am single <3 but don’t talk to me please but do no don’t #when will the therapist waiting list end girl i need it