list of kazeki stuff you should read because they're just That Good (trust me, i am a good judge)
the recommendations vary from fluff to angst! the tags i gave to the stories might be wrong so please read the tags in the actual links pretty please. 🤍 they're mainly gilbert and serge centric
by the way! if you find YOUR fanfic in the list feel free to let me know, so i can @ your blog :)
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paradis (ao3)
gilbert and serge go to the fair.
fluff, really nice, so sweet i might as well get cavities! i love it so much.
you can't hold forever you can't even touch it (ao3)
the boys are lying on the grass. light angst.
i have considered the lilies (ao3)
they talk about their favorite flowers. not sure how to tag this one ...
by: @97tears
when pedestals break, they leave splinters (ao3)
serge comforts gilbert. hurt/comfort, there's mention of gilbert's past.
by: @idealisticshoujohearts
dull gold silence (fanfiction.net)
post-volume 17. angst.
twisted fate (fanfiction.net)
rewrite of the ending of volume 17. there's angst and mentions of SA.
the cynic (live journal)
"pascal reflects on serge and gilbert's relationship", no warnings.
an oldie but SUCH a goodie! it's very poetic, though mostly an internal monologue.
perfume (live journal)
rosemarine and jules share a nice moment together! no warnings.
freak like me (fanfiction.net)
gilbert talks about the way he and serge are so similar, no warnings.
i steep your heart in my chamomile tea (tumblr)
all the information is in the post!
the wind stirring (ao3)
gilbert reflects on serge, and muses on why he is the way he is.
my love makes my ocean swell like a moonbeam (ao3)
gilbert wakes up, serge and him go back to sleep.
by: @lovetornnatasha
poor young master gilbert (ao3)
a helpless background character actually does what we all wanted someone to do and rescues (a very small) gilbert.
warnings are listed in the actual fic! proceed with caution.
by: @nullbutler
i was six steps in when i fell into you (ao3)
gilbert is left alone in his bed
warnings in tags!
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by: @lovetornnatasha
And I demand you put my heart back in my hand / And wipe it clean (ao3)
gilbert kills auguste
the list will be updated if i find more things, won't be taking recommendations tho 💧
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With you, it's different pt. 4
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That night, Gilbert couldn't sleep. he lay down with his back to Auguste who had fallen asleep earlier than him. he chewed into his blankets and eyes fell on the carpeted floor. the time he will leave Lacombrade is near....he has to leave everything with a heavy heart including Serge.
Gilbert didn't want that. he did not want to accept the fact that he would be separated from the boy.
as Gilbert was trying to sleep by slowly closing his eyes, he heard a sound like pebbles being thrown against the balcony glass.
With brows furrowed, Gilbert slowly lifted himself up, sat down, lowered his legs slowly and looked behind him to make sure he wasn't making too much noise lest Auguste wake up. Gilbert slowly walked towards the balcony. He opened the curtains and sure enough; there were 5 pebbles thrown and the person stopped when he opened the curtain.
"What on earth is it...?" he said in a quite voice.
The blond slowly opened the glass door sleading to the balcony and to his surprise he saw who the culprit is.
"S-Serge...?!",
Gilbert said raising his voice but he quickly covered his own mouth and heard Auguste's grunt, but it quickly disappeared. he almost got caught...
Serge is right under the balcony, holding a small pebble in his hand. he also only wears his night gown covered by a robe.
"Gilbert, I-"
The blond was about to say a word but Serge went into the bushes as if looking for something. his eyes widened as the dark skinned boy brought out a ladder and positioned them right in front of Gilbert.
"Serge, what the...? are you crazy..?!" he shouted in a whispering voice to the boy who started to climb. Gilbert reached his hand down and Serge happily held his hand until he was at the point of interest and he use his other hand to hold onto the balcony to support their weights.
they stared at each other for a few moments until Gilbert pulled him into a hug, slender arms wrap themselves around his neck.
"You're an idiot...!"
He heard the blond scolded him against his ear but he didn't care. he hugged him back with one arm.
"What are you doing here, Serge? You're not supposed to be here! How did you get out?"
"I have my idea. I waited patiently until the lights are out."
"Why...?"
"I...I just wanted to see you, Gilbert. I also forget to say something to you..."
"What is it?" Gilbert asked with a slight meek voice which came out naturally everytime he's with Serge. The dark skinned boy brings his hands up to cup Gilbert's cheeks, "this," he murmurs, leaning in closer,
"bonne nuit (goodnight), Gilbert." And their lips press together.
It’s like two worlds meld into one. Serge's lips always feel so perfect against his that every concern, every thought, every feeling that isn’t this evaporates. Everything is warm, warm, warm...
Gilbert happily accepted the kiss Serge gave him. A Goodnight kiss...he never got that from Auguste. Not even once.
The kiss ended perfectly and slowly, both of their eyes are dazed, looking into each other.
Gilbert's slender hands went up to gently cups his cheeks too. he love the feeling of Serge's skin...so warm and tender. his thoughts are cut off by Serge's lips on his cheek, trailing down to his jawline and neck.
"Je t'aime (I love you).." whispered Serge and he gave one last peck on the blond's lips. his fingers also slip off his face and Gilbert just wanted to pulled him back up, to kiss him again, to touch him again and became one with him.
He watch with sad eyes as Serge came down, finally getting his feet on the ground, putting back the ladder between the thick bushes, gives one last glance up at him smiling and then leaving.
He couldn't believe Serge had just risked his "life" just to see him, to say goodnight and a kiss. love sometimes makes people do anything even their lives.
Gilbert is too dumbfounded to say 'I love you too' to Serge before he's leaving...
Love is a fire that burns unseen,
a wound that aches yet isn’t felt,
an always discontent contentment,
a pain that rages without hurting.
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In the classroom, Gilbert silently reading his book. out of nowhere, Jack, their annoying classmate came up to his seat and put his hand on the table.
"Hey, Juliet~ where's your Romeo? I don't see him everywhere~"
Carl noticing the way Gilbert's hands flenched into fists, stood up immediately "enough, Jack."
Jack just made a mocking face and bowed so he was level with the seated Gilbert, "What? why? isn't that true? where is your beloved Romeo, Juliet?"
Carl furrowed his brows and walked up to them "I said enough Jack! you're only going to stir up fights!"
"Leave it alone, Carl! Gilbert would never fight back, would he? It's always Serge protecting his little ass." after Jack said that, he laughed loudly with the rest except for Carl, Pascal, Kurt and Nekka who looked at the blonde with worried eyes.
Gilbert seemed to have had enough, he closed his book hard and stood up. Jack brought his face closer to the blond "Hey hey, someone seems to be upset~ are you going to cry in your lover's arms?~" he giggled.
Gilbert turned slowly towards Jack and in a swift movement, he punched him hard in the face sending the boy flying backwards. the class let out shocked and cheering sounds, Pascal with Kurt and Nekka left their seats and approached.
Jack grimaced in pain as he held his face. he was given no time to open his eyes, Gilbert came over to him again and sat on his torso, clutching his collar,
"what do you want from me?! what do you want?!" he shouted right in Jack's face.
Pascal and Nekka tried to get rid of Gilbert, tugging at his arms but they realized that Gilbert is too strong. His anger makes him unleash his strength...
"What?! you wanna kill me?! I'm already dead, you bastard!", the blond shouted more.
"Gilbert, enough!!"
"Someone call the teacher!!"
"Hey, look, Jack's nose is bleeding!!"
the students there started to clamor when they noticed Jack's nose is letting out some blood. His male peers backed away, some of them are trying to help him, "get your hands off me!!", Gilbert shouted and fought against the hands of his two friends.
Pascal had no choice, he wrapped his arms around the blond's slender waist and held him as hard as he could from behind.
Gilbert instead held the arms holding him together and tears started to fall from his eyes. sadness and anger become one.
Why don't people let him live in peace?
'..Serge, this is all your fault...! Your fault, S-Serge!'
"His punches too hard!" Jack said while still trying to stop the blood from flowing from his nose, "Damn, I think my nose is broken ..!"
"That's what you get! If you had kept quiet, things wouldn't have turned out like this!"
Carl knelt beside the silent Gilbert who let his tears answer all his feelings.
"Gilb-"
"Let go of me! You have no right to hold me!!" shouted the blond still trying to get away and he tried to elbow Pascal behind him,
"uwa-! Carl, do something!" said the glasses brunette managed to avoid the attack. Carl's brows furrowed; he didn't know what to do...his heart didn't know how and didn't give a definite direction. he started to break out in a cold sweat.
Serge, is not there because he got called to play the piano again as usual.
"Carl!!"
Awakened by Pascal's voice and glaring at him, Carl shook his head and his eyes started to watering,
"Forgive me!" before cupping Gilbert's face and…kissing him right on the lips.
Everyone was shocked and silent for a moment.
the kiss miraculously managed to paralyze Gilbert. the blond stopped moving as if he get hypnotized.
'God, forgive me...forgive me....!'
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Gilbert sat quietly on the bed with bandaged fist because he punched Jack with a fair amount of force and it made his skin red. Carl was standing by the window with a hint of regret that he kissed Gilbert. it is a great sin. he shouldn't have done that, but otherwise Gilbert would not stop.
this wasn't the first time their lips touched. Gilbert had kissed him by force before, now, he's the one kissing him...
Carl notices a change in Gilbert when he and Serge form a relationship. Gilbert, change for the better and be more diligent in class time. he always answered almost all the questions which made his name written in the bulletin as the "highest score".
Serge's presence in his life brings positive endings.
"Gilbert..." he called out. he saw new tears fall from pale cheeks with a blush and red lips that curved slightly downwards.
"Carl..."
The effeminate voice called out to him too. he looked up and looked at Carl with a face that shows his true self he hides behind the little devil's mask. the blond's eyebrows arched downwards, his green eyes seemed to have lost their light and his aura was very different.
"W-Will you..listen to my request..?"
"I will..what is it, Gilbert?"
"Can you hold me?"
Carl suddenly shocked and his expression slowly showed fear, but Gilbert quickly parried the words he was about to say,
"Not...not what you think, Carl. I...I want you to be Serge for now. Just hold me.
W-wrap your arms around me. Protect me..he always do that..." Gilbert cried out, his hand clutching the white sheets underneath him and his tears dripping down.
"Hug me...Carl...please..."
He begged again.
'Poor little angel...you wanted me to pretend to be Serge so you could rest easy.
Is this proof that I can only be an outlet for people's loneliness? Oh God, should I?'
Carl chewed the bottom of his lip before slowly approaching the blond, "you won't do anything to me?" and Gilbert shook his head,
"I won't, I swear to God..."
'He bring God it means he really do. Should I trust him...?'
Carl took a deep breath and exhaled. he sat beside Gilbert and waited. the two stared at each other, until the blond rested his head on his shoulder. the neat black-haired boy still too scared to touch him, but it felt reassuring.
'Is this how you feel, Serge?'
a comfort and serenity that he had never felt before.
Gilbert's wavy golden hair also grew longer. finally, Carl worked up the courage to hug the blond and rubbed his back. Carl never comforted anyone, but he'd seen how Serge comforted Gilbert, so he knew a little.
still, Gilbert's heart belongs to Serge and is open only for him.
"You know, Carl..?" the slightly hoarse effeminate voice started, "What is it?"
"I've always been bad. Probably I shall be bad again, punished again. But the worse I am, the more I need God. I can't shut myself out from His mercy....you know what I mean..?"
Carl nodded and Gilbert scoff through his tears, "Of course, you knew...No one is ever holy without suffering, Carl. No One."
'Gilbert...
oh Gilbert...
His heart; some long word at the heart. He is dying of a long word.'
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"The langour of Youth - how unique and quintessential it is. How quickly, how irrecoverably, lost!
I felt that I was leaving part of myself behind, and that wherever I went afterwards I should feel the lack of it, and search for it hopelessly, as ghosts are said to do, frequenting the spots where they buried material treasures without which they cannot pay their way to the nether world...it's hopeless.",
Auguste said sipping his glass of wine with Jules sitting on the sofa the opposite of him with one leg crossed.
"That's very flamboyant of you, Auguste Beau. I never thought such elegance came out of your mouth."
"My theme is memory, that winged host that soared about me one grey morning of war-time. These memories, which are my life for we possess nothing certainly except the past were always with me, dear Boy.
You just have to understand me better." Auguste smile a little, lifting his wine glass up and admiring the crystal sparks.
"But these young people have such an intelligent, knowledgeable surface, and then the crust suddenly breaks and you look down into the depths of confusion you didn't know existed.
Of course those that have charm don't really need brains.."
"Are you talking about Serge? That boy is still young but already possessed a magnetic charm."
"Speaking of Serge, I asked him to come here." just before Jules say something, the doors were open and a tall and slim young man with short black wavy hair, light brown skin and face like a fawn stood there.
"There he is. Come and sit down, dear boy Serge." Auguste said to the boy with a smile. Serge don't know if he should trust that smile or not after what they always went through...
Jules watch him walking to sit beside him. A little far. He eyed by how big Serge have become now and how attractive he have become; his dark hair, his big brown eyes, thick eyelashes, light brown skin and...kissable lips.
"So, how's your piano, Serge?" asked Auguste, pouring a bottle of wine into a new empty glass.
"It's great. My all time favourite thing to do, sir."
Auguste's smile widened, putting the lid back on and put the bottle on the table, Serge take the wine glass. Jules watched the way his lips slightly pursed taking the thin glass in between, the dark reddish purple liquid being sucked into his mouth, Serge's thick eyelashes making it looks like he's closing his eyes when he actually not and his adam-apple slightly bopping as he swallowing.
Jules had never paid much attention to Serge, except for Gilbert, but he realized just now that this young aristocrat is actually very attractive.
His dark skin dazzled him.
Beautiful.
Auguste, notice the way Jules stared at Serge, chuckle and cleared his throat to catch his attention back and it worked.
"Serge, I actually call you here to say Goodbye to you.
Gilbert and I will leave tomorrow.."
Serge's eyes wide open and he was lucky he already put the glass wine on the table in front of them.
Already..?!
"W...what?"
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