from the canon art of chip, he’s the kinda white person who tans really well
it’d make sense for his torso and arms to be tanned a bit the way they’re depicted, since he’s only got the one shirt, which has to be washed at least occasionally.
he also strikes me as someone who’d notice that his legs were drastically pale in comparison to the rest of him and get self-conscious about it and spend some time intentionally sun bathing to tan them uphmm but life on the sea is busy, right? so maybe he’d just go about his duties on the ship in his undies every now and again kjdhfjksdnwould jay make fun of his legs? yeah probably :( which wouldn’t help his insecurity about them :( but that’s the whole reason he’s tanning them, so
jay seems like the kinda white person who’s too pale to really tan. she probably burns easily. maybe chip would call her sunburn karma
wait what if jay’s a freckle tanner. jay with sun freckles <3
i genuinely don’t know how people mistook lizzie for being canonically pretty dark when she 1) used to be blonde and 2) has a rosy blush?
there’s a youtuber called manesbymell who lots of people have mistaken for black and who was blonde as a kid. to me, lizzie has a natural complexion a bit deeper than hers. kinda like mell's sister, amanda, does. the kylie-rihanna skintone grizz describes her as having would come from her suntan
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Maybe it’s bc I’m middle eastern and I would regularly see my facial features in racist political cartoons as a child and well into adulthood but seeing white ppl act like having a hooked nose is an “exaggerated” feature caused by inbreeding makes me want to do things I can not say on this site.
Like pls if you think a feature is ugly pause and think about WHY you think it’s ugly. Mayhaps something to do with internalized racism? Or sorry are all the poc across the world with hooked noses or deep set eyes all inbred 🤔 anyways white ppl kill yourself challenge
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Started reading moby dick and one thing I can’t get over is queequeeg’s use of his harpoon for everything and anything. Like in some situations it makes sense, he shaves with his harpoon because hey, it's good quality steel that’s regularly sharpened and it’s probably available more than a razor is when you’re on a boat. Completely reasonable! But THEN IN THE VERY NEXT SCENE they’re at breakfast and queequeg’s having steaks. Not weird on its own, it’s basically the same as having bacon or sausage at breakfast, no big deal—right? Well it is because instead of using utensils or even his hands, HE STABS AT THE STEAKS WITH HIS BIG ASS HARPOON. And like all the other sailor dudes are crammed in next to each other so it’s not just “oh he doesn’t understand cultural norms” it’s “culture and etiquette aside, you should know better. You could ACCIDENTALLY STAB SOMEBODY IN THE HEAD” Not to mention, HE JUST SHAVED WITH IT. YOU’RE GONNA GET HAIR IN YOUR FOOD. At this point I’m not even criticizing queequeg the character, queequeg the character has done no wrong. I’m criticizing the author BECAUSE WHY WAS THIS NECESSARY THE TEXT HAS ALREADY MADE IT CLEAR HE’S A WHALE OUT OF WATER HERE IN THIS NEW ENGLAND FISHING TOWN YOU DONT NEED TO ADD THIS WEIRD DETAIL HERMAN. WHAT THE 𝗙𝗨𝗖𝗞 HERMAN
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You know what would be hilarious? The Totally Normal Collage Life of one Valerie Gray(tm)!
She PROMISED you see.
It is fuled by the unspeakable rage of every one of her ancestors trying to do their damn job at on 2 hours of sleep and no coffee. Maternal line, of course. Her FATHER'S bloodline is bizarrely chill.
But dear LORD you should have seen her grandpa yeeting hooligans into composting heaps for getting in the way of his early morning baking. You don't MESS with grandpa's bakery, people learned THAT fast. Long time Amity natives the lot of um! All sorts of interests. That side of the family got real... ob.. sessive....
Waaaaaait a second. She's connecting some dots.
Not important! (Currently.)
See, her dad WORRIES. And SHE worries cause her dad worries. So she PROMISED! No funny business. No ghosts. And NO, under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, crime fighting! Just go to her classes and get good grades. Focus on setting her self up for a good future.
O7 yes sir, dad sir! Fuck them ghosts and their nonsense!
So she studied like the brilliant young woman she is. Got FANTASTIC scholarships. Checked out the various colleges. And??
Honestly?
Vibes were RANCID.
Some city's were too... twee? If that makes sense? And some too "time fucky". Others felt "magical nonsense" and "barren Ectoplasmic wasteland"? And the last few were just kinda racist, so that was not happening. Like the CITIES were fine! But the SCHOOLS were... Subtext Heavy.
She might have had to break somebody if she stayed their too long.
She's heard Paulina's going to one of those, though. So... Ha! Rip in pieces fuckos. She honestly can't wait too see THAT gruesome trainwreck from a safe distance. Paulina's gonna THRIVE. Its probably why she even CHOSE that school.
Where was she? Oh, right!
She's deeply fucked and it's Batman's fault!
See, Valerie? Kinda chose Gotham U. It... wasn't her WISEST choice for her "totally normal, crime fighting free, young adult adventures(tm)" but like? What can you do? Gotham just feels so HOMEY!
And MAYBE she gets a little too relaxed. Too tired from a long day of studying.
Some rando tries to mug her with riddles or something! Look, she was TIRED. Not listening. She kicks his ass and goes home. And the plant protest lady. Or that crocodile not-a-ghost?! And YEAH, maybe flying to class wasn't the BEST idea! But like?
How was SHE supposed to know someone saw her?!
@hdgnj @hypewinter @nerdpoe @lolottes @ailithnight @mutable-manifestation
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