#like god I always forget how to talk

[aphsillyos]

his default recall is so cool..........

#not me arts tag #ive never used his default skin so i didnt even know what it looked like until now....ough #i wish u could mix and match sounds or recalls with skins................ #i honestly forget half the time hes supposed to be like. Cool and Suave and a Competent Badass #because my brain is always like. god hes so small and floppy and will die if you breathe on him wrong #also hes always crying and breathing heavily in my ear so im just like. poor guy #he should be at the bed taking a nap not fighting....... who made him fight.... stop that he doesnt belong on the battle field #he might be a badass hitman or smth but my brain is like #this is just a sad theatre kid who took gymnastics #''aphelios how is your assassin training going'' aphelios who has only been reading the acrobatics textbook: my what #is there anyone still reading these tags. hi there #i have a lot of thoughts on him. im very obsessed with his animations #like he has a laugh animation for every weapon....... #all the various weapon animations... #maybe the real reason we wont have a legendary for 10 more years is all the animating they have to do #i mean his base animations are so good id honest be like OK if they reused them #cant rly do much better than already Top Tier animations #unless we get an alune legendary..... #hope alune is super awesome and badass and all the aphelios voicelines are a really shy awkward guy or smth #like you look so cool and awesome fighting and the whole world doesnt know ur listening to a lil guy in your brain the whole game #the contrast would be very funny methinks #if anyones still reading this. yes i know riot made up some reason about budget or whatever for voices #but i choose to believe aphelios is head empty no thoughts and thats why he doesnt talk to alune #(STILL GOOFY OF A REASON... lots of VAs can do both genders of voices.... like. what about kindred and kayn....) #then again wouldnt be surprised if they were overbudget on the animations but still smh my head into oblivion #can relate to a guy who simply doesnt wanna talk #(said after 10000 tags of talking to myself) #i should really put my thoughts onto a separate post or blog or something #anyways have i mentioned i think hes really cute

[kiwikiwiandkiwi]

.

#at some point you make peace with the fact that that's harry’s image #he is a womanizer #but god why do these stunts always have to be with the worst people ever???? #i know next to nothing about her but i’ve seen the news about her and her latest dates #so it’s easy to assume she is not good news #but i really try to understand what’s their goal (and by their i mean harry himself and his team) #honestly after the mess that it was dwd and also holivia #and the way his comment about gay sex backlashed like so badly #and also after his grammy speech not being well received #i’d assume the best thing right now would be to keep things low and quiet #like he’s only touring right now nothing to promote nothing to be relevant about #so why not keep it this way #i just would think sometimes that would be for the best??? at least just for a little while #i guess i can answer my own question by saying they’re trying to keep his name relevant and keep people talking about him #just keeping his name in the news #so people don’t forget about him or whatever #maybe i’m being naive but not all press is good press #that’s more than clear now after how much hate he’s gotten in the last 7/8 months #so why do they always go back to the same route?? #we are all tired - not just his fans - but every single person that’s perceiving harry is tired #people start to resent anyone who is in the media for too long #specially if said person keeps giving you reason to maybe not like them #i’m not even angry or feeling anything really - by now i’m used to it #but you can’t tell me that the same M.O. over and over and over and over again is good #this formula has already proven (many times!!!) to not always being the right answer #like seriously what's their goal?? because harry being a womanizer is more than well established by now #i don't think we need 'proof' of it for people to say 'oh it's just an excuse for the storyline of the next album' #we actually don't need any kind of proof anymore for the rumors to exist lmao #i guess all of this is me saying that i really wish i could have the answers i'll never actually have #anyway rant over i said nothing new goodnight

[chibi-scone]

It’s been said before and the fact that I’m an Izzy simp aside like having a character who survives the most certain death shit ever (shooting himself in the head at point blank) and literally being nicknamed by another character “indestructible” and then become a symbol of protection for a whole group of people die from a fucking bullet to the side that was established in universe to have no vital organs in order to “atone for his sins” or however you wanna spin it and have him say he wants to go after (see point one) literally trying to kill himself in the show that is literally about growth and betterment of the self in a cruel world that wants you dead and where the main (and mostly queer) characters survive the most batshit insane injuries is like COSMICALLY stupid writing like I don’t even understand how you get there and the fact that it’s supposed to be a kind/ happy/meaningful ending is beyond me

#and Izzy’s whole speech to Ricky before that could be interpreted as what like #being about even if you kill and try to eradicate queer people we’ll always be here #and then have RICKY deal the killing blow ???? #wahhhh it’s symbolic #ok it would’ve been more symbolic to have the fucking queer character live like idc you’re all stupid god bless #ofmd critical #tbd #maybe #oh and then I mean not even talking about how it’s supposedly all good #because the main gays who had borderline no redeeming qualities this season had their picket fence ending #literally what’s the point of having Ed come back from the dead #so he can learn that death is not the answer and that there’s love and betterment for him #and have that whole scene with Jim and Archie where they refuse to kill one another because there’s more to life than the cards #they’ve been dealt and they can be the difference #JUST TO HAVE THAT ENDING #my god I just #sorry if you guys are sick of me ranting about ofmd like 5 months after the shit show supreme #but these are like all thoughts that I’ve just had in my head for months but tried to forget #and now they’re just spilling out like idc anymore #ppl have made so many good posts that all say what I think but ig I still need to rant myself jvhsjnv #how long can your neck be for it to allow you to bury your head so deep in the sand #where you truly believe this is good writing idk #side note but gifs of cats randomly blowing up are my favourites #‘Izzy bettered himself before dying so it’s aaaallll good’ hits you hits you #stupid ass shit argument but also that was across maybe a week and dude was piss drunk dissociative half the time

[mel-loly]

-“Just a flower, in the middle of the field at night, a light is turned on and reveals.. A day arriving with confident hope and silent happiness!”🌹🐝

#for those who didn't get it.. today is my birthday! and so tomorrow is really the day of the party and etc.. #that's why I put “arriving” because tomorrow is a really special and very important event in my life akzbskhzjsb #and yes. I'm cosplaying as princess bela. she's one of my favorite characters and her dress.. It's literally a dream come true for me! #because I'm really going to use one similar to this one tomorrow irl and- #I won't tell you guys more details because it's personal things but- well. that's a little explain of what the art is about! #I really feel very happy.. and I admit. I don't even know how to explain my happiness but.. well... #I feel special. surrounded by people who *really* love me and show true affection for me and.. #that I just have to thank. for everything. I have gratitude for all of you! like- thank you very much. really. for everything.. #I can't even express in words how grateful I am for each of you #know that I love and appreciate everyone who is still with me on this journey called life! #and of course- I couldn't forget to talk about him lol. thanks to mike! #I don't know what would have become of me if I hadn't met someone as friendly and good-hearted as him #he was always by my side and made me feel more special in every day. in a unique way and one of the most important to me.. #I love him very much/p. and I hope that our friendship will be forever happy and respectful the way it already is! #(of course. this also works for the other friends I made here too- please don't get mad or jealous! I love you all. okay??) #and well.. that's it. #I hope I still stay here. that I enjoy my day and face any fear or harm that I might have ahead of me and.. #that I just hope for the best. I put everything in God's hands and I feel confident that things will work out no matter what the cost! #thank you guys again for everything and happy birthday to me lol-💛 #happy birthday to me #it's my birthday #mel creator #mel loly #cosplaying of beauty and the beast #i'm mel and this is my blog✌️ #my art blog #art mel #art #my art #my oc character

[mossyflowers]

I'm regretting the trig post. People stop getting on my ass about not liking trig challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)

#moss talks #please for the love of god. i understand what it's like when you see something disliking something you like #i know it's funny to say you actually like the thing that the funny haha joke person dislikes on the post #but please for the love of god i am a highschooler with a lot of shit goin on and my math teacher is NOT that great of a teacher #you can tell me about the equations and practical uses of it but i have to have this shit and how to solve it MEMORIZED #and he's barely taught us how to do it #LEAVE ME ALONE AAAUAUAUAUUAUAUUAUAUUAUAU I'M A LITTLE GUY #anyways probably going to delete this later i'm just. a little annoyed. #deadass i have such a hard time with maths because I always forget the equations and little nuances unless it's drilled into my brain #and that has NOT been happening with trig and it's one billion little pieces that we spend like three days on before moving on

[nonuggetshere]

GOD I HAD AN IDEA AS I WAS FALLING ASLEEP TODAY

About FaaF naturally

A sad one, TW fir near child death and harm

Involves Xero's attempt at an assassination, or it could be literally just any guard controlled by the Radiance

PK and WL need to talk about something private, and WL looks at the tiny vessel tagging along by her wyrm's side

"Should it be here?"

"It wouldn't understand anything anyway."

"Still, it's...a little..."

He sighs lightly, "Yeah, I get where you're coming from... Vessel, come here."

He kneels down and orders them to sit by the door and wait for them while they talk, says he'll come pick them up once they're done and not to move, then the two go to talk on the balcony and close the door behind them

At some point, Xero/the guard bursts in and attacks PK in the middle of the conversation, managing to take them by surprise and so gets one good swing in before PK darts away and retaliates, pinning them down with soul blades, though he has to keep his wife from killing them on the spot - he doesn't want to be so hasty, knowing they're infected and not themself. He pulls out the sword from his chest and that's when they realise, it's covered in void...

Child harm/near death TW beyond this point

After a moment of shock White Lady, who's closest to the doors, runs out and all her husband can hear is a horrified, heartbroken scream. He feels nauseous, his stomach twisting into knots and feeling like his heart is in his throat as he runs out after her. He sees her in tears, cradling a tiny bundle soaked in void. There's- there's so much void. It covers the floor where he left their child vessel and soaks through his lady's shawl and clothes as she cradles them in her arms.

For a moment he's paralysed, before he just snaps. He flies back onto the balcony, screaming at the possessed guard that he'll kill her, he'll make her pay for this, and he slays them in his rage (something he'll regret and feel ashamed of later), still hitting and screaming at Her well after the possessed person is dead and she can't hear him anymore.

He collapses, panting, near tears, and just gets himself up and stumbles out the door and towards the two, he wants to see how bad it is for himself.

Flower survives, but just barely. They had multiple stab wounds and lost their left arm, if not for their parents immediately healing them they'd be dead. They're barely older than 5, still so very little and defenceless, PK is horrified at how could anyone hurt a baby this young and helpless (hypocrite), even if they're not alive.

They're still on bed rest because that was so much damage and their mother doesn't leave their side and their father only leaves when necessary. They still don't realise Flower's alive and they know they shouldn't be so attached but it still feels like their baby and they can't just leave them. WL spends the entire day by their side, gently stroking their hair and horns with her now permanently void stained hands and softly coos and sings to them

Of course, they quickly realise they ARE alive because no way in hell a toddler is getting this hurt and NOT crying and screaming the second they wake up <3

Which just makes this situation so much worse

#thylacines can talk #faaf au #mentions of child harm and near death in tags too btw #so dont read further if its something youre sensitive to or cant handle rn #i like to write him as more sympathetic in faaf but i cant state enough what a gigantic hypocrite he is #pk: How can you hurt a child?! they're FIVE! #child harm cw #radi: ...dude. #dont make your kid a child soldier but also you cant 'all fair's in war' your way out of stabbing a toddler radi #unrelated tangent but they both suck and god i need to focus some more on FaaF Radi. Ik this AU at times feels like sympathetic PK and evil #villain Radi AU but it's really not. They're both morally grey and while Radi is a bit more. questionable and less sympathetic imo. doesnt #mean shes completely evil. they're both meant to be morally grey and both did equally horrible irredeemable shit that they come to regret #and wish to fix. ik it doesnt come off this way at times because i have my things i prefer to write at times and this AU was always a #relationship dynamic exploration between Flower and all different characters. but neither PK nor WL are by no means forgiven. Most of their #kids range from ''i literally dont care about you you are not my parents dont contact me again'' to ''i hate your guts'' #with sometimes an added flavour of ''And I WILL murder your ass if I see you again'' for some of them #(Razor my beutiful wife with unchecked anger issues <3) #sorry if the tags are incomprehensible it is 5 am and i instantly forget anything i write the second i cant read it fully #once i finish writing a tag and it collapses the contents of it instantly leave my short term memory. im not being dramatic btw the amount #of times i have to back out from editing tags to read them back bc i forgot what i wrote is annoying

[fullmetalpotterhead]

THIS IS SO PETTY BUT ITS MY PET PEEVE SO LOOK

Chapter 120, XL says:

Then chapter 179 HC says:

And then in chapter 238 HC says:

BUT THE ORIGINAL QUOTE IS XIE LIAN’S!!! HUA CHENG ATTRIBUTES IT TO HIM BOTH TIMES HE REPEATS IT! HC DID NOT SAY IT FIRST, FACE THE FACT THAT XL IS JUST AS MUCH OF A MUSHY MESS FOR HIS HUSBAND AND LET THEM AT LEAST SHARE THE QUOTE, IT IS NOT SOLELY HC’S!

#tgcf #I know this is very petty and minor but I ALWAYS see people talk about it like a HC quote which isn’t false but isn’t true either #XL says some extremely profound shit and immediately gets embarrassed but HC took his words to heart because he understood and felt the #same way #HC does have very poetic lines that are solely his but I’d attribute this one to both of them and if forced to pick one it is XL’s quote #the fact that HC is repeating XL’s words is so meaningful to how they use this quote to me and I think people forget #makes my heart so happy for them #also I think part of the reason HC seems to like this quote so much is because his god said it first #HC has long felt this way but XL was the first of them to admit ‘no matter which version of you it is I’ll love you’

[killuaisaprincess]

Everyone always whines and cries how everyone ignores G//on

AND IF YOU DARE TO BRING UP KIS TRAMUA THEY ARE LIKE BUT WHAT ABOUT G

What about g KIS FANS ARE ANNOYING THEY SAY

Omg WHAT ABOUT G

MEANWHILE BACK WHEN I WAS ON A BLOCKING SPREE ALL I EVER SEE IS ANALYSIS POSTS ECT ABOUT G G AND HIM AND HIS TRAMUA AND THE BOTH TOGETHER MAYBE BUT KI ALONE MAYBE 1

SO I DO NOT EVEN WANNA HEAR IT

AND LET KI FANS CARE ABOUT KI

JUST LIKE U CARE ABOUT G

Stg these people wanna act like Ki’s life is so easy and CAA wasn’t hard on Ki CUZ WHAT ABOUT G

#personal #DONT CARE HATS OFF #KIDDIE GLOVES OFF #Damm if I could block every kg person and every G Stan in existence I would #CUZ GOD FORBID ANYONE WANNA TALK ABOUT KI #AND I DONT EVEN LIKE HOW MOST PEOPLE TALK ABOUT KI OR KI STANS #DONT LIKE EM EITHER BUT GOD FUCKING DAMM #THESE PEOPLE #vent #stg I am so cut off from fandom I don’t really see this dumb shit anymore #BUT I’m sadly still subjected from it from time to time #AND I CANNOT HOLD IT IN ANYMORE #there are no tags so it won’t be going in anyone’s tags and there are slashes so just let a girl vent #I hate this fandom so I ain’t #TRUST ME I avoid it #I’m a smart person I know better than to interact with shit I hate #I try so hard I forget it exists outside my two people #plus honestly I am too old to care #Idc if kg is popular I hate it and it isn’t canon #idc if people say u should love G and he’s sooooo underrated Ki will always be my fave #AND I WILL PUT KI IN DRESES AND I WILL MAKE HIM SHORT AND I WILL DO #EVERYTHING FANDOM DOESNT CUZ #who are they? I may have 2 followers and a dream but even if they all have 60k #they aren’t Beyoncé theyre just another human the end #Besides do I really care about people’s opinions with 60k tweets I don’t think so lol #and this is from me who is like OBSESSED #but even I know how to touch grass I may be to poor too #but I’ll play games and watch movies #KI WILL ALWAYS BE MY NUMBER 1 #but I try and touch grass sometimes

[legendary-assassin-stance]

oh i'm sorry, i didn't realize we were taking moral standing points from the asura now. y'know. the race that full-hog experimented and ripped apart sylvari even after knowing they were wholly sapient beings (and it wasn't even inquest! it was regular fucking asura! the arcane council most definitely okayed those experiments! never mind the fact that the council TO THIS DAY fucking openly allows inquest to do as they please so long as they don't cause trouble in rata sum) and have done little to nothing to apologize for that fact to their sylvari allies.

but no, you're right, the humans are the worst race in tyria just by way of existing and trying to find a place for themselves. how could i have ever thought different?

#from beyond the grave #hi i'm going to go fucking feral #I'M NOT EVEN A HUGE HUMAN FAN. i have them and i love the ones i do have! but i greatly prefer sylvari as my playable race. #what the FUCK are you talking about #“did everything they can to push other people off their land” are you talking about pushing charr out???? cus uh. #i don't know how to tell you this but the charr STOLE THAT LAND IN THE FIRST PLACE EVEN BEFORE HUMANS #dont even get me started on their HoT take (the One Expansion that anet gave sylvari before forgetting they exist) #and the icebrood one (the charr should have never been the fucking main focus of the goddamn NORN PLOT ANYWAYS) #the “human interference” in icebrood was literally a fucking BLIP amongst the bullshit of the charr getting involved #don't even fucking talk to me about “humans being lynchpins” for icebrood. it should have had NOTHING but NORN LORE. #it was the NORN PLOT. jormag had always been NORN STORY AND PLOT. #“buhbuhbuh humans” I DON'T GIVE A SHIT. THE CHARR SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN THERE EITHER #it's extremely telling that you don't care that the charr shouldn't have been there either #and only focused on the .0000000000003 seconds that kas helped in anything related to the plot #while also framing crecia and rytlock's relationship problems throughout as “human-looking” squabbling #god forbid rytlock get some character development where he WANTS TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for his kid #(even tho it should've happened in a charr-centric story thread and NOT THE FUCKING NORN ONE ANET) #and every charr in the world is like “but why do you care??” because charr society is so incredibly FUCKED re: their kids #“being attentive to the story” my fucking ass. just say you fucking hate humans as a race and move the fuck on. #i didn't mean to rant this much in the tags but the more i stared at the post the more i felt like biting someone #OH. OH SORRY. i just noticed that #the person was like “lol inquest figured out how to harness elder dragon energy before xunlai <3” #JUHGTFJHKDFJHGLKFD ?????? #okay for one the inquest are a bunch of literal rat bastards who caused a NUCLEAR REACTOR EXPLOSION in metrica #i'm not going to trust a fucking inquest ANYWHERE NEAR ME let alone praise them for “ethical” dragon energy #the “uhm ACKSUALLY S W E A T Y” tone of voice re: canthan tech vs. asuran is asinine and also annoying as fuck #“all of PoF was about humans :(” IT IS LITERALLY. ABOUT A HUMAN GOD? IT IS *THE* HUMAN XPAC. #IT WAS NOT A SURPRISE FOR IT TO BE HUMAN THEMED? WE KNOW ELONA IS H U M A N S ? #yet again. what the FUCK are you even talking about. #OKAY. jesus christ. i think i'm finally done bitching about this.

[gio-cosmo]

I’m taking some community college courses soon and istg if someone doesn’t see the fandom related stickers on my laptop and immediately become my lifelong bff I’m dropping all classes idgaf

#LMFAOOO IM JOKING OBV #likeeee persona fans flock to me please #persona fans out in the wild pls be my friend 😕 #“out in the wild’’ I say in reference to the college campus 💀 I’m cooked #my honest reaction as I register for college after years of claiming I’ll never go to college 🤯 #LMAOOO #I woke up last month with the random realization that writing is my lifelong passion that I’ve been avoiding fully delving into— #out of fear of failure #so this is what we’re doing now ig! #“Gio what about coding and game development?’’ #well unfortunately coding makes me enter a state of misery every time I attempt it #so I’m putting that on the back burner for now #I’m not giving up on it by any means!! but I enjoy writing so much that it seems more sensible for me to pursue that at the moment #ANYWAYS #sorry for always rambling on here 😭 lol #my laptop is actually coveredddd in persona / chainsaw man / genshin impact stickers I’m lowkey embarrassed #I also have an Ib sticker but I’ve never seen like anyone talk about Ib unfortunately 💔 #Ib fans where are youuuu #is it unprofessional to have ur laptop covered in stickers am I cooked 😕 idk how college works like at all #I’m so fucked oh my god. LMFAOOO #mfw I lack basic knowledge #I’m trying my best over here fr 😞😞 #I ALSO HAVE MIKU STICKERS #can’t forget the miku stickers ofcccc #I’m sure you’re all really invested and interested in what stickers I have on my laptop #I mean this is world altering info. really crazy stuff #💀 #someone take the tag feature away from me at this point

[golforoosh]

.

#i know it passes like it always does but time has never been so slow #im so exhausted from feeling this way and not being able to do anything or even talk about it. i want to fix it but he doesnt.. im so stuck #my heart hurts my head hurts i want this to end #i want the floor to open up and swallow me whole. why did i have to agree to this #why couldnt god just give me smtg easy #smtg easy to test me with. why did he have to test me with my emotions. why do i have to suffer so much at the hands of a man #who doesnt know how to treat a woman so that when shit happens. im always the one that is at fault #ive never felt so alone #someone talk to me so that i can break this silence #make me laugh so that i can forget about my problems even if it be a few minutes #i miss when i used to actually feel like i was a somebody on twitter when people would like and retweet my tweets #why cant those days come back. days where small things would make me happy #days where i had people in my life that made me feel special #what am i doing here #what happened to me

[justablah56]

that moment when you think about a friend you haven't seen in 2 years and you realize wow the attachment issues are strong with this one

#just blahs #kinda rant/vent in the tags bcs i feel like maybe writing it out will make me feel better but making it as a part of the post seems too much #anyways lmao #said friend was basically my first real friend that i can actually remember and we were literally inseperable for the like . 2 years we had #but then they had to move away #and yeah i technically still have their discord and i can (do) message them every once in a while #but like . im constantly worried that maybe they wish i just stopped #Im always the one to reach out to them first mostly because like every once in a while i literally just sit and cry bcs i miss them #and i have no idea if they miss me too #because they were literally such a vital part of my life but maybe i wasn't as vital in theirs #maybe one day ill actually talk to them about all this #maybe some day I'll tell them that i have a playlist dedicated to them that i listen to sometimes when i miss them and want to cry #maybe some day I'll tell them that i still always sleep with the little plushy they gave me the day before they left #maybe some day I'll tell them how much i want them back and if maybe . just *maybe* they want me back #or maybe some day they'll tell me they've moved on and that i can stop checking in on them every few months #maybe theyll tell me that its weird that i *havent* moved on #because its been two god fucking damn years #thats plenty of time for me to just forget about them and move the fuck on . #its not like i don't have new close friends anymore . bcs i do . but theyre not *them* #i just want to know if they miss me even just a bit as much as i miss them #i need to know . #idk #i really shouldn't be allowed to stay up until almost 4 am lmao #anyways . might delete this in the morning we'll see #I'm just in a missing them mood rn im fine

[iniziare]

Muse Aesthetic / Feelings

𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒.  being unable to stop smiling. laughter. bear hugs. happy tears. waving arms around. dancing. contently sighing. eyes twinkling. laughter lines. childlike playfulness. skipping. talking more. affection. cracking more jokes than usual. gesturing more when talking. higher pitched voice. squealing. jumping around. clapping.

𝐒𝐀𝐃𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒. tearing up. self-hugging. one-arm cross. an aching chest. scratchy throat. a runny nose. turning away. deep breaths. quivery smiles. crying. infantile sobbing. hands gripping each other or an object. covering mouth. puffy eyes. eyes appear red. voice breaking. a distant or empty stare. monotone voice. asking for comfort. faking a smile. crumbling. shaking. whimpering. depression. abusing an unhealthy habit (excessive training). withdrawing from others. big teary eyes. doing something even if it could hurt them.

𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑. furrowed brows. baring teeth. passive-aggressive comments. avoiding eye contact. sarcasm. headache. sore muscles. hiding clenched fists. irritability. jumping to conclusions. raising voice. going silent. demanding immediate action. keeping it all in until exploding. body tensing. making risky decisions. middle finger.

𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐑.  wanting to flee or hide. what-ifs. images of what-could-be flashing in mind. uncontrollable trembling. rapid breathing. screaming. a skewed sense of time. irritability. keeping silent. denying fear. turning away from the cause. pretending to be brave. nail-biting. lip-biting. scratching skin. a joking tone but a voice that cracks. fainting. insomnia. panic attacks. exhaustion. substance abuse. tics. rushing adrenaline. face draining of colour. hair lifting on the back of the neck. feeling rooted to the spot (!!!) making body as small as possible. staring but not seeing. crying. a shrill voice. whispering. gripping something or someone. stuttering. flinching at noises. pleading.

𝐄𝐗𝐇𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍.  constantly yawning. blurring words together. dark circles or lines under eyes. mood swings. hallucinations. calling people by the wrong name. dizziness. denying they’re tired. slow blinking. trouble concentrating. stumbling. leaning on a doorframe for support. sluggish movements. falling asleep someplace that isn’t a bed. becoming irritated by the smallest things. “i’m awake, i’m fine.” shaking so bad they spill their drink. fall asleep in their clothes. lay their head on the table because they’re so tired.passing out.

Tagged by: @militus an age and a half ago 🤍 Thank you, I had fun! Tagging: /cracks knuckles. @sicsemper (Gee, I wonder who), @rcdfcxr (initially I wanted to request just Rufus, but I'm really interested in Reno as well, so both!), @inventorem (@aworldofyou because I don't know if you'll see this otherwise), @svnsworn (Jessie), @blitzrod, @tscng, @sentmail (I'm on the 'Lemme learn about Kunsel' train, shh), @lionfated (I've been missing Leon, pretty please), @annjiru (I also am on the Angael train still), @cwarscars (I need you to envision me as a koala very dramatically clinging to your leg), @spynorth (if you tell me you've done it already Lucas, it doesn't matter, do it again and again!), @trickstercaptain, @freedomhasfangs, @lighthouseborn (I can never have enough Henry Turner in my life, ever), @weaponiised, but also— @liifestreams (please give me Reeve, the novel is killing me slowly and he killed me a little). And anyone else? Steal it, I'm sure I've forgotten people and it's nothing personal whatsoever!

#[ tifa lockhart. ] she had buried the twinges of guilt beneath the narcissism of self-sacrifice. beneath the belief of 'the greater good'. #[ tifa lockhart / et cetera. ] but i work for shinra. i'm the enemy. / i don't care. i don't want anyone to die. please! #[ tifa lockhart / meta. ] people have many things pent up inside of themselves. so many things they can never forget. strange isn't it? #[ it has been years and i still never can decide what to 'file' this stuff under. probably just a me problem. ] #[ it's not quite meta because i didn't write it-- it's also not 'relevance' because-- well. not using it for this. ] #[ any way-- this was /very/ fun actually. and i sat here in contemplation for a few of them. ] #[ this actually puts into perspective; again; why i love the nuance of animation that remake gives tifa. ] #[ the voice and animation definitely added to just about anyone; i always want to point out how much of tifa is in the subtleties. ] #[ the clenched fists-- the self-hugging. the doubt that lingers within regardless of anger. and how it's shown even in little gestures. ] #[ like when she suggests going out on the town with cloud and he questions her for half a moment-- she folds back in on herself. ] #[ same thing with the train for example-- literally rooted in place. and it's not taking away from the bravery she holds on many levels. ] #[ it's the nuance of bravery-- that it isn't black or white. you can have doubt and i think the remake did a chef's kiss job with that. ] #[ because we're so immensely layers as human beings-- so it's incredible to me to see a game reflect on that so heavily. ] #[ that game is incredibly human. it's an incredibly good depiction of human nature and reactions. ] #[ and god-- the VAs add to that magnificently. truly. ] #[ i literally cannot praise britt enough. she was so nervous and she aced it. they all did. ] #[ god; all i can think about (especially) is the 'what-ifs'-- literally. doubt. /doubt/. and that is what makes her so good. so real. ] #[ i'm gonna ramble a little more; excuse me-- can we talk about how realistic that is? no one who's brave won't doubt their actions. ] #[ tifa has lost everything to shinra-- sephiroth is shinra 'gone wrong'. she lost everything at his hands and no one could stop him. ] #[ not even shinra itself and that's very important. there's so much anger there that drives her to do selfish things. ] #[ and i note selfish because on the way to a smile has touched on this magnificently as i'd hoped it would. ] #[ she wants them to pay-- she wants her revenge. but she; arguably more than anyone; is aware of what that costs. ] #[ if avalanche goes through with this-- and she helps-- AND SHE DOES. she is responsible for people losing... ] #[ what she once lost. ] #[ and that is /so important/ to her character. before that happens; she is riddled with doubt. before she boards the train-- ] #[ when she's boarded the train and needs to jump off. that moment is /the/ moment where she makes a huge decision. ] #[ because look at how she is once she's jumped off. that entire chapter. she's relatively certain. she's going through with it. ] #[ no way back. ] #[ and then the plate falls not long after. /and then the plate is dropped/. yep. ] #[ ... i'm about to hit tag limit; don't worry-- i'll type about this soon. it's in my onenote! ]

[re-alku]

goober

#ra ra rasputin #its kodya #kodya karevic #mr karevic #on god i need to figure out how to draw his pre incident haircut because hes funny to me #i got the current one down to a science #idk why he always has white hair somehow though #fighting the stressed allegations fr #also that time he was responsible for the death of like. over 25k people at least #because people keep on forgetting that this story is about Time Bullshit #french russian war of 1812 #god why the fuck was he in canon alive at the time of napoleon #mf literally went yeah fuck napoleon all my homies HATE napoleon #at 17 #ridiculous ass lore #im so sorry but his is so funny but those mental health issues must be terrible #actually i cant tell whats worst post incident trauma or pre ros trauma #literally cant catch a break so he just kind of freed himself from the narrative and changed his own fate with his bare hands??? #and hes not the main character so we dont talk about it #room of swords #how did i forget. that tag #go boy go #alku art

[potatobugz]

opening untitled google doc #7592 so I can attempt to write something again but ultimately never finish it

#rambles #but ill keep doing it bc. if i dont write i will never learn #i had another homestuck scenario i wanted to write but you see i only have an idea for one specific part #and i have 0 writing experience so i cant write it that well if i dont have a good udea 4 what i want to happen #anyways the premise is that feferi ascends to god tier (more like cod tier) after eridan kills her #& she revives nepeta and equius. the rest of the trolls r like hesitant to revive eridan right away #but feferi goes ahead and revives him anyway bc she has very conflicting feelings & shes like 'i just wanna talk 2 him 38(' #ofc this backfires #eridan waking up & immediately assuming the worst; freaks out and runs away from her cuz he thinks shes gonna [krill] him again #(fish pun bc i saw the opportunity and couldn't resist) #then he runs into kanaya and freaks out EVEN MORE and then attempts to run down stairs & trips on his dumb scarf (affectionate) #and falls down a flight of stairs #ive had that specific scenario in my mind for like a few days now!!! and ive been dying to put it down somewhere!! augh #other cincepts i havent fleshed out include: eridan hiding from everyone on the meteor. eridan and gamzee alliance maybe. #some exploration on how kanaya feels abt this bc i feel like kanaya is always portrayed as angry at eridan but ppl forget WHY shes angry!!! #shes *greiving*. the matriorb was like the hope for their entire race & she was tasked 2 protect it and it got destroyed #its very sad to me. murderstuck as a whole is tragic 2 me because theyre all children and i dont think any of them shoulda died #idk i hope that makes sense #um also eridan putting themself in a cycle of 'not evil anymore i want to be loved now. evil again' cuz #characters who destroy their relationships w others over and over again mean everything to me. self destructive characters my beloved #and also everyone who was revived makes it to the alpha session so eridan and roxy friendship can thrive <3 (i am ill) #and also eridan transgender arc is mandatory sorry #wow i am sorry 4 talking so much down here ive been DYING 2 get this idea out but like #i cant ramble normally in posts i have to do it in the tags or i get self conscious otherwise agh #feel free to add onto this if youd like i think #homestuck #oh also maybe nonbinary roxy too maybe bc i really like nb roxy headcanon and also t4t pale eriroxy so wonderful

[bookwyrminspiration]

at any given point in time there is a text i'm not responding to

#shitpost #how do people do this...how do they just...continuously talk to people... #how do they keep track of all the different people #i always forget who i need to respond to and when i last did #someone sent a message a few day (?) ago I should respond to #someone texted me back this morning but I texted first in response to a few days of not responding #so i. will wait? #i don't like responding immediately most of the time because what if /they/ respond immediately and then we're in Conversation #i can't just Enter Conversation on a whim #and then when I finally DO respond....they respond BACK #god maintaining relationships is hard <- has difficulty maintaining relationships disorder #also this is not about any one specific person #so no one who does message me feel bad okay? #my choice to engage with you and if I do so its because I like doing it #ophelia i'm saying this for you in case you see this you have nothing to apologize for <3 #i'm just talking about myself none of this has to do with anything you've done