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kkeidawrites · 3 years

Note

Can you please write something for pregnant Greta? Like, it comes to a shock to both Greta and Alucard but they’re both so excited and happy about it or Alucard knows before she does and his dramatic ass plans a whole 9 yard evening dinner and tells her? Idc what it is but we need more Daducard content!!!

Her scent was different these past few days. He couldn’t quite put his finger on what it could be.

Greta had been going to the latrine more often than usual and Alucard decided to try something to confirm his suspicions.

Her mood had also changed a lot during the past couple of weeks and Greta claims it’s just the stress from the building of the wall around the ever growing village of Belmont. There was also a time where Greta fell out in a faint while working on blueprints for the proper rope that needed to be used when building the wall.

The people of Belmont voiced their concerns to the dhampir and Alucard needed some advice on what it could be.

“Alucard, how often have you and Greta been…you know,” Sypha’s unfinished question makes the dhampir tilt his head in confusion. He had made a stop at, she and Trevor’s home to talk about Greta’s current conditions.

“What?” Alucard asked.

“She’s asking how long have you been fucking the headwoman unprotected?” Trevor’s vulgarity never ceased to amaze both Sypha and Alucard as his quip is earned with a slap to the back of his head.

“What does that have to do with-”

“Alucard, have you ever thought that maybe Greta is…pregnant?” Sypha asks and Alucard thought for a moment. He and Greta had been very much, been ‘together’ ever since they had married a year ago but, he would had never thought that he would have been able to procreate, albeit with his vampire and human background, it seemed impossible.

“She has been going to the latrine more often than usual, but I didn’t think it would pertain to that.” He tells Sypha.

“But you did say her scent has changed, right? The signs are all there. The fainting, the multiple trips to the latrine, she has been snacking a lot lately and it’s all going to her hips.” Alucard blushed at that. Greta’s hips have widened a bit and he has very much appreciated the change in them.

He often finds himself placing his hands on her hips and most instances squeezing her ass at the extra plumpness there.

“You should tell her Alucard.” Sypha suggested and Alucard sucked in a breath and then felt his cheeks flush a bit.

“And if she’s pregnant…? How do you think-do you think she would be-”

“Of course she would be thrilled Alucard,” Sypha grasps one of his hands in her small ones.

“You two have been together, going on two years now, not only are you both amazing godparents to our son, you both care enough to put others before you and are willing to do everything in your power to keep the people happy. That also means that you both should be happy as well.” Sypha tells him.

“But-”

“Oh for Christ sakes, just set up a dinner for you two tonight and just tell her. What’s the worst that can happen?” Trevor says with a shrug and Alucard bites his lower lip.

That evening, Alucard guides a giggling Greta to their shared bedroom and opens the door for her to step in first. She smiles at the gentlemanly gesture and Alucard watches her go inside their room his eyes finding her ass, bounce more often than before.

Her gasp of surprise made the dhampir look up to see Greta place a hand over her mouth in surprise at the small dinner setup in front of the fireplace. The small dining table held two plates and glasses with a nice dinner garnished on top.

Alucard closed the door and makes his way to her side, pulling out her chair and letting her sit in it. She thanks him as she is scoot in close to the table and Alucard takes his own seat across from her.

He serves them both a plate of grilled fish with potatoes, garlic and spices and then a glass of some sweet juice that Greta loved so much. The two quietly eat in silence.

Alucard’s heart seemed to be beating awfully loud as he kept sneaking glances at his love and Greta secretly smiles at this. The two years she’s gotten to know him, she noticed things that she would keep to herself. Even a particular spot under his chin that she loved to rub that makes him…she wouldn’t spill all that.

Alucard took another bite of his meal then set his fork down and cleared his throat to get her attention. Greta takes another sip of her drink and looks at Alucard’s slowly turning red face.

“Nervous?” She asked with a grin.

“Um, a bit.” He says rubbing his sweaty hands together.

“I wanted to tell you s-something. It’s a bit um…life changing.” He tells her. Greta’s eyebrows raise in surprise.

“Really?” She questions.

“Yes! Um, I think you will like it, love it actually,” he says and moves from his seat to take a knee by her hip. Greta turns her body to him.

Alucard grabs her right hand and kissed her knuckles, staying there a bit longer for her to feel all of his love for her.

“I love you. You know that right?” He asked and Greta smiles with a nod.

“As much as I love you.” He smiles.

“Greta, I…”

“I believe that you may be with…that you…”

He clears his throat again nervously. Greta felt she didn’t need to play with him anymore and put her left hand under her chin.

“So, when are you going to tell me that I am pregnant?” His eyes widened and then he laughs as she laughs as well.

“I’m guessing you already knew?” He asked.

“I just found out this afternoon, I was going to tell you later this evening, after we had dinner and among other…things.” She hinted with her eyes pointing to the bed.

“How did you find out?” He asked, actually curious.

“Adrian, I’ve been around pregnant women ever since I was young, I know the symptoms and I kind of figured I was with child when I kept blowing my chucks in the latrine far more times during the day and my snacking went straight to my hips and ass. I went to the healer and they had me do the latch test, and low and behold I am indeed pregnant.” She tells him.

Alucard’s lips break into a smirk and he suddenly scoops her up into his arms as the woman giggles.

“I can just pretend we didn’t break the ice on the news and we can still do other ‘things’.” Alucard teases as he walks them to their bed with a playful glint in his eye.

“What news?” Greta plays along and Alucard kisses her as she laughs again.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$&$$$$$$$$$$&$$$$

I am soooooo sorry for the late response to your request I hope you like it!

Part 2!

#castlevania #alucard #fanfiction #my writing #adrian tepes #castevania greta #greta of danesti #alucard x greta

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caffiine · 3 years

Text

A BRIEF PAUSE

From my regularly scheduled content. I’ve got some shit to say, y’all (forewarning for spicy language and spoilers)

I thought about making this post on my fandom subblog but this show and this relationship have been TOO important to me for the past 8 years to not give it its proper place in my life. strap in bc im not sure how long this mf is about to be.

When i started this DUMB show at age 19 tortured soul “empath” dark academia me thought sam winchester was going to be my favourite character. and don’t @ me, i love sam now in his own right (and we deserve some SAILEEN PEOPLE). but after literally less than 5 episodes i KNEW dean’s character and his arc were going to be amazing and beautiful and he immediately became my favourite brother. The nuances of his character i.e. his shell vs his true self were so evident to me even in the first couple seasons. in my humble opinion, he had the most growth of the two brothers.

They all deserve to be happy, but for whatever FUCKING reason dean has the HARDEST TIME OF ANYONE being happy in this show. I know it’s his character. I know it was written that way. But FFS. I kept wondering when they were going to wrap up his emotional arc and stop torturing the poor dude.

then in season 4 they introduced castiel and 1) I thought the new concept of angels as assholes was super cool and 2) I hardcore SIMPED over misha collins (still do). I watched benignly as cas and dean began to form this relationship that seemed pretty special. I started watching the show when it was in its eighth season and I binged the shit out of it for two weeks until I was caught up. By the time I was caught up I was CERTAIN there were some feelings between them and I LOVED it. I am bisexual and I was ECSTATIC for a potential queer relationship between two masculine-portrayed dudes. I went on tumblr to express my newfound theory, only to find out that this was a real THING. “Destiel” was already an idea that had absolutely and intensely BLOSSOMED in the fandom for several seasons already. So many others saw what I saw and saw the potential of emotionally tortured/constipated “daddy’s blunt instrument” dean and the unfeeling daddy’s boy cas “crack in his chassis” Winchester being allowed to be happy together. I felt validated and hopeful. For a while.

Then it was season after season of hopefulness for them to be finally happy with each other while still fighting the ills of their world with sam and the other new members of their family that were added along the way, only to constantly have that hope seemingly teased away at the end every single time. By season 11 and the introduction of amara (not bashing, eventually loved her character and her development too) I gave up. I lost hope. I stopped watching the show. I didn’t want to keep watching my two favourite characters continuously abused by the story they were thrown into.

I know not everyone likes destiel, not everyone thought it was real. That’s chill, idc. Stories are so often meant to be (and sometimes inadvertently) left up to interpretation by the person experiencing and consuming them. It’s what’s so amazing about books and shows and movies that are able to make us feel so intensely about them and their characters. And I felt SO strongly about dean and cas. It was honestly really upsetting to me, the way the show was going with their relationship.

A while later season 13 had been going on and I started seeing some things pop up on my dash. Hopeful things. I did a bit of research and accidentally saw THE SCENE from season 12 and I couldn’t help myself. I restarted it. I watched the whole thing from the beginning again AND introduced it to my boyfriend I think partially as a way to ensure I wasn’t imagining shit (it took him awhile and a lot of me internally screaming during many scenes but by season 9 he was like “uh are they in gay love”). Fast forward to me finally catching up as season 14 was starting. I was still hopeful, somehow. And it happened AGAIN. Season 14 and the beginnings of 15 made me so sad. I HATED what they did with their relationship. I HATED the way it ended. I HATED the way dean treated cas and everyone around him. It felt like the show was taking his whole character arc back to day 1. I didn’t understand. I kept watching for a couple episodes after the big argument and cas left but the luster was gone and eventually I just stopped.

I love this show. It has meant so much to me as a story. So many of the characters are/were very dear to me. I know it’s a running joke with this show about character deaths and homophobia but the strength of the bond I felt was between cas and dean gave me a lot of hope. But it wasn’t enough. I felt betrayed one too many times. And for those of you who kept watching, for whatever reason, I don’t hold it against you. It’s still a beautiful and interesting story without cas and dean’s relationship. But I just personally couldn’t do it anymore.

I hadn’t planned on watching the rest of season 15 when it came back after pandemic hiatus, at least not for awhile. So imagine my FUCKING surprise when I was doom scrolling through twitter during election week on Thursday and I see supernatural trending right along with election shit.

What.

I couldn’t stop myself, I looked and literally SCREAMED and made my boyfriend spill his wine all over our couch. I didn’t know exactly what happened as I hadn’t seen the episode but APPARENTLY all my emotions and feelings had been at least partially vindicated. So I BOUGHT season 15 so I could finish watching where I had left off. I watched 8 episodes in less than 24hrs (don’t judge me there’s a quarantine) and I LIKED them. And it might’ve been bc I knew what was about to happen in 15 x18 but I really felt like the show was getting STRONGER as it neared its finish.

I was so excited for 15x19. I read so many posts from fellow fans, destiel and antis alike. There really weren’t a lot of bad emotions running around. Everyone seemed hopeful and excited like me.

I probably don’t need to go over 15x19 emotions but im going to anyway. I was disappointed. I was confused. I was angry. we are in season 15. The last season ever for this show that has had a HUGE following of fans who have loved it, sometimes unconditionally, sometimes even though it wasn’t the best (and sometimes less than good). A season and show that had just announced YES. CAS LOVES DEAN. ITS REAL. And I shouldn’t have to go over the nuances of why we would expect more after this, with two episodes to go before the show is done forever.

But I will bc im mad af.

Like I said in the beginning. Dean’s character arc has been incredible. His emotional growth – as subtle as it might’ve seemed – has been amazing. And dean has always been an emotional, loving person. he just felt like he wasn’t because the world made him feel that way. And that’s sad, y’all. Dean deserves to realize he DESERVES happiness. And in 15x18, we were finally heading basically directly there. With destiel, yes, but even if you’re anti, what cas said to dean about who he is and why he loves him obviously struck a fucking chord with dean. It obviously changed the way he viewed himself (RE: “that’s not who I am, that’s not who we are”).

But for WHATEVER reason that’s ALL we got in 15x19. One fucking SENTENCE about dean realizing maybe he’s not just built to kill people. And then jack leaves without a single mention of Eileen or cas or Charlie or literally anyone they ever cared about and dean rode off into the sunset alone with his brother while we watched a fucking FIVE MINUTE MONTAGE that made me want to hurl my own body into the sun they were driving toward. And cas is STILL DEAD.

BUT THERE’S STILL ONE EPISODE LEFT AND FUCK ME IF I HAVENT BEEN PAINTING ON MY CLOWN MAKEUP ALL WEEK. SO WHAT DO I WANT????

ONE: DEAN DESERVES HAPPINESS. REAL HAPPINESS. What the FUCK supernatural??? Wasn’t this the whole point of his arc??? And don’t get me wrong I REALLY want that happiness to come from Cas and a real spoken relationship of some sort between them bc it also ties in with my second point but tbh just PLEASE let dean be happy. Dean is a loving person and does everything for love as we JUST FOUND OUT. Dean would NOT be happy with everyone he’s ever loved gone for the rest of his life. I just don’t believe that’s fucking true. h elp him pls.

TWO: CAS DESERVES HAPPINESS. I know we got this whole speech about “happiness isn’t in the having it’s simply in being” but like. Really. Castiel was supposed to be a throwaway character no one was supposed to care about. But we all cared SO MUCH that he lasted 11 SEASONS longer than intended and became a main character and an integral part of the story. Cas has arguably sacrificed more than anyone on this show. His last act was to sacrifice his life to save the man he loved. He knew where he was going. He knew he was finally going to be able to tell dean he loved him and then immediately be taken by the empty where we know now thanks to season 15 that everyone in there just gets to dream forever about their regrets and sadness. HOW IS THAT FAIR. HOW IS THAT A GOOD ENDING FOR CAS. HOW DO YOU EXPECT ANYONE – CHARACTERS AND FANS ALIKE –TO BE HAPPY ABOUT THAT. Its messed up, supernatural. Y’all KNOW it is and I hope to HIGH HEAVENS this is going to be corrected in 15x20.

THREE: give sam Eileen back.

Well that’s all I’ve got in me, folks. I’m absolutely and intensely dreading Thursday. Im scared and nervous and obviously still angry that this is absolutely going to be the opposite of what they promised – another “game of thrones” ending. Some of y’all are giving me hope with your posts about maybe they’re trying to keep the ending a surprise and maybe cas is coming back and how can they not and why else would they have done the second to last episode like that and I hope yall are right.

Either way, im glad I am not alone with my feelings. Thanks yall for the experience of this fandom and show. Let’s stick together on Thursday, no matter our differences.

PS stop calling jensen ackles a homophobe or ill hex you.

#supernatural #destiel #deancas #oh and #saileen #just to make sure theyre not forgotten #dean winchester #castiel #Misha Collins #jensen ackles #15x18 #15x20 #15x19 #i fucking guess #dean x castiel #casdean #castiel x dean #supernatural season 15

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beginagaininspo · 4 years

Text

TIME TO CELEBRATE SCIENCE AND TECH

— LORD TECH GALA INSPIRED STARTER MEME !!

( add a && for a reverse on the prompts that are muse specific in action. )

TALK SHOP.

[ virtual ] for OUR MUSES to discuss the implications of VR.

[ nanotech ] for OUR MUSES to discuss the future of Stark Industries.

[ cyber security ] for OUR MUSES to discuss Drake Industries.

[ guardians ] for the POSTER’S MUSE to comment on the developments at LordTech.

[ partnership ] for the POSTER’S MUSE to talk about some ideas they might have that would work in tandem with the new tech presented.

[ clinics ] for OUR MUSES to discuss the popup clinics sponsored by Lord.

So, is L-Corp a video game developer now? That’s what VR is for, right?

VR has a lot of interesting applications! It is so much more than video games.

They’re... going to use heroes as security? Might as well call them mercenaries then.

Do you think Stark made the nanotech colored in red and gold to match Iron Man?

The tech of the century is at our fingertips and you’re biggest concern is what color they’ll come in?

Should we taking bets on how long it takes for someone to hijack the VR systems and start manipulating our brain and memories? Just me? Okay.

Can you just be excited? For two seconds?

Technical advancements like this are what led to Ultron... and the sentinels. Hard to get hyped with that in mind.

WE’RE HERE TO PARTY.

[ cheers ] for the POSTER’S MUSE to raise their glass in celebration at the prompting of the SENDER’S MUSE.

[ dance off ] for the SENDER’S MUSE to challenge the POSTER’S MUSE to a dance off.

[ slow dance ] for the SENDER’S MUSE to extend their hand in invitation to dance with the POSTER’S MUSE.

[ sneak ] for the POSTER’S MUSE to catch the SENDER’S MUSE trying to sneak an extra shot of alcohol after being cut off by the bartender.

[ spill ] for the SENDER’S MUSE to bump into the POSTER’S MUSE causing them to spill their drink.

[ clean up ] for the POSTER’S MUSE to help the SENDER’S MUSE clean up their outfit after a spill.

[ taste test ] for OUR MUSES to sneak into the set up area and try some of the other snacks available.

[ serenade ] for the SENDER’S MUSE to attempt to serenade the POSTER’S MUSE.

[ banquet ] for the POSTER’S MUSE to catch the SENDER’S MUSE shoveling food into their bag.

The open bar looks pretty nice right now.

Are they allowed to cut you off? It’s celebration!

I’m not cut off! They just won’t serve me anymore!

Did that kid just swipe a drink?

They are either really feeling their drink — or the music... and I’m not betting on this beat.

You know, this song isn’t half bad.

You’re not going to stand in the corner all night, are you?

There’s a nice space outside if you want to go for a walk... get some fresh air with me?

It’s really stuffy in here, there’s so many people...

Don’t look at me like that, I’m hungry.

Shit — I’m never going to get this stain out!

THE COWL COMES OFF.

[ double ] for OUR MUSES to accidentally wear the same color / accessory / mask / or theme idea for our outfits.

[ unmask ] for the SENDER’S MUSE to break code by taking their mask off.

[ compliment ] for the POSTER’S MUSE to compliment the outfit of the SENDER’S MUSE.

Who are you supposed to be?

Put your mask back on! You’re not supposed to show your face!

Do you think I can get away with just a pair of sunglasses instead of a mask?

This isn’t a mask, it’s a way of life!

Your mask needs more glitter!

Your mask isn’t covering anything...

WHO TEXTS AT A PARTY?

[ text ] did you pull out a flask?

[ text ] no one needs that many cheese balls

[ text ] it wasn’t magic, idc what you say

[ text ] is it so hard to believe in magic?

[ text ] why are you looking at your phone! go talk to people

[ text ] you keep texting me! let me eat these pretzels in peace!

[ text ] are you even talking to anyone? or are you just pretending to have a very serious conversation on your phone? i need to know for financial reasons

[ text ] they were trying to HIT ON YOU, you idiot

[ text ] when i call you an idiot, i mean it lovingly

[ text ] when i call you a dumbass mother fucker, i mean that in the same spirit as the dagger emoji

[ text ] are you making a tiktok in the corner?

[ text ] i might be addicted to social media but that doesn’t mean that’s the /only/ thing i do!

[ text ] your obsession with tiktok has gone too far this time

[ text ] if you want to be in the video just ask

[ text ] i’m scared that i’m gonna sneeze and a bunch of glitter is going to shoot off my face

[ text ] * indistinctive conversation * — my phone wants to say hello

[ text ] if you want to get out of here just blink and i’ll pretend to faint and then we can get the hell out of this place

[ text ] do you think they take requests? i’m about to put in a hundred song requests

[ text ] where the hell did you go?

[ text ] if you left without me, you better turn your ass around come back

[ text ] do you have a needle and thread? i am having a wardrobe crisis

#beginagainmeme #type: ask meme

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aw-eather · 4 years

Text

Heather Watches SG1: s2ep22 Out of Mind and s3ep01 Into the Fire

Ah two of my all time favourites. Maybe even THE favourites. They’re just SO good. Also my shipper heart cannot take it but we love torturing ourselves here so lets go.

I’m gonna try and do enough that y’all get at least one post a day and scheduel them to go up periodically :)

This go very long so I hope it posts properly.

Ooooh mysterious tank

I mean honestly this was suspicious from the get go

Don’t trust this guy

JACK

YOU’RE ALL WET JACK

Is he?

Are they dead tho? Are you sure? Cause that sounds fake...

You see, the year is now.............. 2077

CREDITS

Teal’c looks all big and scary but really he’s a precious boy

End credits

TERYL ROTHERY

honestly that device looks very Star Trek

Missed opportunity to make a 69 joke

Girl he has been asleep for 79 years he probably remembers shit all

Good boy, answer nothing. Don‘t trust the random men that woke you up

thats not sarcasm, I don’t trust them either

“the rest of the facility” riiiiiight

Wizard of Oz reference

38 teams is a lot of teams

MMMMMMMM sounds FAKE

DON’T TRUST HIM JACK

General whats his face just dropped something on the ground

STARGATE

Jack is handsome

Me: I’m gay

Jack O’Neill: Yeah sure ya bethcha

Are ya just? What makes ya think Jack can help? he’s been asleep for 79 years

Tok’ra mind probe

Benefical alliance my ass, what did they ever really do for the Tau’ri??

Except promise to send a ship when they “had one available”

So thinking of Sam right now would be BAD Jack.

NOX

I LOVE THE NOX

WHAT CUTIES

look at them, they’re so sweet

Jack stop thinking and showing them shit

Could be a great weapon but the Nox are peaceful and beautiful and I love them

LITTLE GREY ALIENS WITH THE LITTLE GREY BUTTS

Thats a big ship

This is the only “look at all the shit we’ve managed to do so far” episode that is actually any good

Why don’t we meet the Furlings?

I wanna meet them

They sound fluffy

I love the baby asgards look at ‘em so cuuuuute

Kathrine! You’re great girly

“Touch it” *Jack touches it without knowing what it does, could die*

Jack waving his gun to touch the molecules seems like a bad idea

Yeah let him rest stop bullying him

purple goop

stop the pruple goop Jack

purple goop is never a good thing

Oh look... ANOTHER tank

DANNY BOY

Please cover your nipples

I don’t wanna see your man nipples

A third tank... funny that

SSSSAAAAAAMMMMMM

Funny how none of them are ACTUALLY dead

LIES WE’VE JUST SEEM THEM

Get these people some clothes

leaving her wrapped in a blanket is rude

Blanket looks like a mat tbh

BRATAC

SKARRA

Daniels hair is so bad in this episode I’m not sorry its HORRIBLE

He has a SHIELD Jack

FUCK YEAH JACK THROW THAT KNIFE YAS

HATHOR

I love Hathor hosts

She’s great honestly

Sam and janet and the girls kicking ass is the best

RIP Hathor

No seriously Daniel’s hair is BAD

Teal’c

JANET

ah yes, unusual

Teal’c is so passionate and caring about his friends I love him so much

THREE FUCKING WEEKS?!?!?!?!

janet is such an angel you can’t convince me otherwise

Are they tho?

Yeah he would but Teal’c with do anything for his F A M I L Y

Well he will leave

Aw Teal’c I love you with my entire heart

That zoom in on the patch is nice

YES JACK STOP THE GOOP

Nice kick!

BYE TEAL’C I LOVE YOU

AWW THIS EXCHANGE IS SO NICE

AW THE SALUTE BABE NO THAT HURTS MY HEART ITS SO SWEET

#SorryNotSorry but Jack looks so fucking good in this outfit

Like... he looks sooooo good

God I am questioning my sexuality left right and centre today

But seriously can he dress like that more often?

Go get ya girl, Jack!

Oh look... not the SGC

WHO WOULD HAVE EVER GUESSED

Serpant and Horus guards! :O

STOP THINKING BABE

THEY GONNA FIND YOOOOOU

SAAAAAAAAAM

BEAT THIS GUYS ASS AND SAVE. YOUR. GIRL

O U C H THAT WOULD FUCKING HURT

SHOULDER TOUCHING

SHOULDER RUBBING

SHOULDER TOUCHING

SHE IS TOUCHING HIM

I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD FOLLOWED BY A MEMORY OF HIM NEARLY DYING

SHE’S STILL HOLDING HIS SHOULDER

STARING AT HER NAKED BACK

TRYING NOT TO STARE AT HER NAKED BACK

HE IS SO IN TROUBLE

HE FANCIES HER SO MUCH

I MEAN SAME

she also looks good but like he looks better???

GRABBING

WALL HOLDING

HANDS TOUCHING SHOULDERS

PINKY CURLED IN SO HE DOESN’T TOUCH BARE SKIN

COULD HAVE MOVED BUT ISN’T MOVING

THEY WANNA HOLD EACH OTHER

DEAR GOD

sorry I’ll stop with the caps

I just physically cannot with those two

i love them so much

and i hate how they were treatd

Hathor you idiot,

SUANNE

LOL Jack

Servants in the royal court? Yeah sounds great

Rude Jack

lol the pat on the shoulder Jack you dick

uuuuuuhhhhh didn’t notice before how HOT IT IS WHEN HATHOR RUNS THE IDC REMOTE UNDER SAMS CHIN AND THE LOOK SAM GIVES HER I-

ACK SNAKE

I hate them the same way Jack does tbh

they make me squirm

Give it to Daniel. Why is Daniel the only one that never has a snake in him... wait...

sorry but I just wanna talk with the national captions institute...

Alright! On to Into the Fire!

DAVIS

MAJOR DAVIS I LOVE YOU

MY FAVOURITE

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH EVEN IF THINGS DO FALL TO SHIT WHENEVER YOU’RE THERE

Dramatic zooooom on Hathors name for E M P H A S I S

CREDITS

I love how Hammond is like EVERYONE is saving SG1

How DARE you, Daivs. They are THE team, rude!

I love that everyone steps forward because everyone loves SG1 but also everyone knows you don’t leave anyone else behind.

I love Hammond

MARTIN WOOD :O

He is a great director

Ew snake

Jack still looks fucking good

Jack now is not the time for sass

Give it to Daniel. No one cares

Sam is like “I’m not scared bitch bring it”

Of course it wants Jack

Poor Jack

Why is it always him??

You tried, buddy

Sam’s hand on his CHEST PLEASE JUST GET MARRIED

TEAL’C

BRATAC

Sam literally hates watching Jack in any pain

Poor Jack

Hathor fuck off

What exactly was the point of ripping his shirt? It makes no difference to the snake going in the back of HIS HEAD

oh gross

i hate it

I hate it so much

ugh the chills I currently have

Suanne Baun is super pretty though

YAS TOK’RA LADY

WE RESPECT AND LOVE YOU

Another Wizard of Oz reference

Sorry Daniel looks so bad

its the hair honestly, the little dorky fringe

Sam’s hair, on the other hand *chefs kiss*

Yeah but he’ll be fine, Tok’ra lady saved the day <3

YAS GIRL

NOOO Poor Tok’ra lady

Sorry fam, I forgot her name lol

Sam pulling that jacket on, Sam in a jacket thats a little too big for her , Sam in a white shirt.. Sam

Yeah they are Teal’c.

Dead and false and dead... or is he???

Hand dance

Energy barrier is in the way, boys continue to shoot

oh no shooting towers of death are never a good sign

And of course Daniel got hurt so we have to baby him for the rest of the fucking episode jfc just sit him down somewhere and Sam and the rest of the teams can do the hard work... again

Cool Tok’ra tunnels are Cool

Lol Daniel being sassy (oh its just a deep, bleeding gash, it’ll be fine) lol sorry he is funny when he’s sassy

I’m sick of your army already, Hathor

OOOOH a barrier

Hammond is awaiting

Why do they give them such short time periods to do shit? Like they know things go wrong literally ALL THE TIME

Like “hi you have 24 hours to go into a SECURE, GOA’ULD FACILITY, RETRIEVE THREE SG MEMBERS AND GET OUT. PIECE.OF.CAKE”

6 hours is a long time to sit on your hands and do nothing tho. Ah well might as well go and save the boyfriend

The president can suck a rotten potatoe

Davis, you can’t really argue with him, he outranks you about 4 times

Sam’s sleeves are too long and baggy and its SO CUTE

GO SAM

SAVE THE DAY

BUT SAVE YOUR BOYFRIEND FIRST

Hammond visiting Chulak

because he’s an angel baby

and the best dad ever to his four kids; Major Dr Science Space Baby, Sassy Grumpy Fruit Loop and Sam Carter Loving Space Baby, Warrior Gentle Giant Space Baby and Annoying, Doesn’t know shit, Archaeologist Space Baby.

Yas Teal’c, spill that tea

I will join you, bb

Hammond in a toga will also join you cause he a babe

and he needs your help cause Davis said No.

HAMMOND OF TEXAS IS MY FAVOURITE THING EVER I LOVE IT

Sam: I’m gonna go and shut this shield down

Sam: but not until I have tried to save my Future Husband.

Poor Tok’ra lady

Hand on chest again

Fucking Hathor man

Go away boo, you’re ruining the moment

Stop hurting Sam

YAS JACK FUCK YES I LOVE THAT

I love his response to it too

Like the shock and fear

This hug goes on a long time

I know he’s cold or whatever but like...

and I know he’s in shock and so is she a bit

he’s doing it for her as much as him

but they’re STILL hugging

They literally never do this again

Its so sweet because after this its just... nothing? Like POV happens and then Upgrade and Divide and Conquer and they go ah fuck we can’t hug anymore so all we get is platonic shoulder holding and using shoulders as pillows. The closes we get to a hug is Death Knell and emotional trauma Threads. I want a REAL hug

And he holds her arms for ages and helps her up

Wow they’re so fucking in love this hurts

“Found ‘em” Jack stop so cute

C4! Who’d have thought it

Ah shit they’re surrounded

He still looks good

They BOTH look good

They make a great couple

Nope, not really but its what ya got so you’re gonna have to deal with it

This general guy is a bit of a dick

Thats right Sam, don’t listen. Good job, Danny boy.

Only 1? Thats not a lot of time

Get out there, Jack! Buy that time

Gun Bum! (if you know Sanctuary, you’ll get it)

He’s really not doing a great job of pretending to be a Goa’uld

Its really not impossible

ex-goddess lol

“She’s Gone. She is no more.” I’m honestly shocked people didn’t shoot him more often

I love him tho

Thank god, thats good timing

Hammond is IN. HIS. ELEMENT

There is no way she heard hiom say now but she still knew. I love them. I love how well they know each other and they’ve only known each other a little over two years

Time to KICK SOME ASS

JAFFA YAS

ooh coming in from behind, sneaky

YEEHAW

OH HAMMOND YOU PRECIOUS BABY

Sam going straight to Jack and it looks like she goes to put her arm around him.

I hate them ffs

Bra’tac and Human fuck me thats so cute

Sam’s smile when they see Teal’c and Hammond is Gorgeous

and Hammond patting her on the back! stop! I love Space Dad and his idiot Space babies.

Final Thoughts:

Seriously guys this is my favourite Final and First eps of a season.

100% one of my favourite two parters, if not my all time favourite two parter

Great direction, good story, excellent bad guys, good acting, just enough suspense with out being too drawn out, something for everyone, comes of the back of a fun as fuck episode (1969), Hammond has a big part, Davis is there, lots of cute Sam/Jack and of course, Daniel’s Elf Hair.

Also the Tok’ra are actually useful in this one which is SHOCKING

Lemme know your thoghts friends, I’m excited to hear them!

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calliecat93 · 4 years

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So to recap briefly, the heroes made it Atlas! But they are now going to jail! Is that the fastest that everything has gone wrong in a volume? Anyways! We’re now going from the grimy city of Mantle, to the so-called utopia in the sky. What will happen now? Will our heroes become jailbirds and we get the RWBY rendition of Jailhouse Rock? Or will ironwood be able to bail them out… although if he does, I still would love a RWBY version of Jailhouse Rock. Someone tell Jeff Williams to get on that! But I guess we better answer the question, so to the review!

Overview

Atlas personnel are airlifting RWBYJNRQO to Atlas along with some random guy. As Nora tries to chew her way out like I do when I can’t get a bag of chips open, Jaune complains about how easily they got taken down with Weiss confirming that the Ace-Ops are Ironwood’s specialized forces. This catches random guy’s, who the credits reveal is named Forest, attention. He’s surprised since, in his own words, they are Ironwoods personal attack dogs so them going after anyone is kind of a big deal. He himself got arrested for protesting about the mistreatment of Mantle… well okay, it was because he threw a brick at a ship, but same deal! But from him, we learn of a woman named Robyn Hill and the Happy Huntresses, who are graduates of Atlas who stayed in Mantle to defend the people and try to make those people’s lives better. Robyn’s fighting for a seat on the council to end Ironwood’s ‘tyranny’. Weiss questions that last bit as dramatic, with Forest calling her out for living a cushiony life due to being a Schnee. To which Weiss can only reply that she isn’t anymore.

Things take a turn, however, as the gang isn’t taken to jail. Instead, they are taken to Atlas Academy. As they’re taken inside, Ruby isn’t sure what to do but says that they should be careful with that they say and Blake says that they’ll all follow her lead. Everyone is led to Ironwood and, to the surprise of Weiss, Winter. Oh, and Penny’s there too! Yay!!! Winter has the guards free them, or she will start hurting them. Ironwood apologizes as he leads everyone into his office, having assumed that the ship was stolen… and Ruby confirms that’s the case. Winter gets angry due to how dangerous and irresponsible that was… but she’s stopped when Weiss hugs her. Weiss explains that they had to, to which Winter calms down and hugs back. Aww~ That being said, she’s not happy that Qrow allowed it, which leads us to the topic at hand. Qrow says that they have confidential intel to give… but to his and everyone’s surprise, both Penny and Winter are fully aware of the Relics and Maidens. Yep, Ironwood told them as well as Ace-Ops, but he does have a reason.

He explains that when Oz died, he had to formulate his own plans in order to ensure Atlas’ safety against Salem. Ace-Ops gave him the Relic of Knowledge after the arrest, with the Staff of Creation safely sealed in the Vault and the Winter Maiden is in stable condition. But now we get to the topic of Atlas’ current image due to the Embargo, the troop recall, the closed-off borders, and as the teens point out, the discourse and poor treatment of Mantle. This makes Ironwood look… well, bad, and he knows it. But again, he explains the reason why. Remember Amity Colosseum? The location for the Vytal Festival? Well, the plan is to turn it into essentially a satellite and with its launch, they can re-establish global communications and as such, even if another CCT were to fall then they can avoid that issue again. Which… is a good thing! It is a huge handicap for everyone across Remnant that locks them from the rest of the world, and fixing that is a very good idea. The problem? Well…

The second part of the plan is to go public about Salem. Let me repeat: the plan is to GO PUBLIC about SALEM. You see the problem with that, right?! Well, this is why Ironwood has his troops on high alert. He knows that this will cause mass panic and thus mass Grimm attacks. So he has all of his forces on standby to be ready when all Hell breaks loose. After everything is secure, then he’ll go global with the reveal. Essentially, Ironwood thinks that keeping the fight secret is now outdated, especially after the Fall, and as the title suggests, it’s time for a new approach. With Ozpin not there to guide them, Ironwood is doing what he feels is best despite knowing how many lives that Oz spent keeping the secret. It’s at this point, however, that they reveal that Oscar is the new Ozpin. He’s happy to hear this and begins to express this to Oz… until Oscar breaks it to him that Oz is currently gone. Which naturally gets Ironwood to question how that is.

Before Oscar can say anything, Ruby steps in and answers the question… by saying that after the train crash, he was just gone. Nothing about Jinn. Nothing about Salem and Oz’s history. Nothing about Salem’s immortality. Oz was just gone, and they don’t know the reason why. When pushed about what Oz said about the Relics, she says what Oz originally told them; that the questions had all been used up, which she fully well knows is not the case. Ironwood seems to accept this and assures Oscar that he’s safe in Atlas. He then gives Ruby back the Relic of Knowledge as a sign of trust before offering the resources of the Atlas Military to help get the gang upgraded and ready for the fight ahead.

Everyone is free to go, and they briefly encounter the Ace-Ops. Clover apologizes for what happened earlier and that he and the others are looking forward to fighting alongside them. We also get to see and hear the other four and the credits reveal their names as Elm Ederne, Marrow Amin, Harriet Bree, and Vine Zeki. Harriet seems to be clearly based on The Hare from Tortoise and the Hare and Marrow could be one of many things since Aesop had a lot of wolf-inspired stories. But due to his brief fib about not looking forward to working with the team, I’ll say The Boy Who Cried Wolf. Not 100% sure about Elm and Vine, though there is a fable called The Elm and the Vine so that could be the inspiration, but we’ll see when we learn more about them. As Penny goes to give the gang a tour, despite their exhaustion and just wanting to go to bed… and not being pleased that they have to stay in dorms like the Beacon days, Ironwood stops Qrow. Why? Just to tell him that he is genuinely happy to see him again. He even hugs him! Aww~ Hopefully, THAT won’t lead to anything horrible later!

Speaking of horrible, remember in V6 when Tyrian revealed that he and Watts were being sent to Atlas? Weeeeellllll…

We cut to Watts, a suitcase with who knows what in hand, walking through Mantle during a rainy evening. He and Tyrian are using mobile communications since being in one location makes it easier for them to be found out. He seems to have full control over the security tech of Mantle since unlike Atlas, the coding is never updated and we learn that he helped write said coding. He demonstrates this by knocking out the cameras and we end with Tyrian (with his fancy V4 coat back!) exiting a building. He walks away, a pool of blood spilling out from the cracks, and the cameras fail to see the man who caused it. A dark sign of what’s to come…

Review

HO BOY, do we have a LOOOT to talk about. So, we’re not gonna waste any time. Let's talk about Ironwood and his current plan.

Let's weigh both sides here. On the one hand, Ironwood’s plan… makes sense. At least logically. The plan to use Amity Colosseum to reestablish global communications is a sound one, and is something that should be done. Doing so could also help clean up Atlas’ tarnished image after all the recent decisions and after being painted as the bad guys at the Fall of Beacon. His plan about going public also does have a legitimately good point. What has keeping the fight secret solved? All they’ve ever been able to do is push Salem back, never stop her. The people deserve to know what’s actually happening, especially after the Fall where many got killed because of it. Ironwood is keeping it secluded to Atlas first and needs his forces ready for the fallout as well as all the ammo and safety precautions needed. It explains the Embargo. It explains the police state. It explains the closed borders. You can look at all of Ironwood’s actions, and it makes sense when you look at his plan. Chaos is going to break out, and he has to be ready for it.

But, of course, we have the other hand. For one, he’s depriving other kingdoms of safety and resources due to his actions, making it harder for them to protect themselves. And even then, Mantle is being treated like garbage, even though Ironwood should also be keeping them safe instead of acting like a dictator. Even if he accepts that as a necessary evil, there are better ways to help Mantle without making them terrified or feel like lower class. We saw last chapter that even children are fighting back against the drones and hanging up political posters. Children. That… is not a state that any city should be in. As Qrow said, they don't need the whole military for the Amity Colosseum, and there are better ways to prep troops without causing panic. Ironwood did this at the Fall when the Vale Council gave him control, and he had a huge army set out. The result? Well… I don’t think I need to recap that. He is doing the exact same as before, but without anyone there either capable or willing to talk back against him.

But now we get to the public plan. This is a horrible plan. As they said in V3, this breaks pretty much everything that the world ever knew and is going to cause mass panic. IDC if the army is ready for it, they are severely underestimating the results of this decision. Ones that are going to cost the kingdom. Badly. Like… brink of destruction levels of badly. Plus again, Ironwood is doing exactly what he did the last time. He’s opening the floor up for the exact same results. Even if they updated their coding, Watts will likely find a way through it. Look at how easily he did it in V3 with the virus he supplied Cinder. The same thing is bound to happen again, only this time I highly doubt that they’re going to get things under control until… well, there’s nothing left to take back.

This is insanely risky. Too risky. Now, could there be a way to break the news to the world without the same risks? I don’t know. But I do know that this is the wrong way to do it. It has too much room for error and doesn’t take into account any of the things that went wrong so badly last time. Then again, with Ironwood’s paranoia, who knows what else is going on that he just hasn’t said yet? Trust seems to be the theme of this volume, and Ironwood seem willing to give the gang his. But… IDK. Something feels off. There are some theories going around about him using the hug to bug Qrow, or bugging the Relic. IDK if I belive that, but I’m not ruling it out either. Maybe he does trust them, but the ‘what-ifs’ are too much in his mind and he can’t help himself. After all, as he said in V4, Oz didn’t listen to him. What’s going to stop anyone else from doing the same?

This is why I don’t blame Ruby for lying. Anyone can tell that Ironwood is on edge. How dangerous and reckless his current plans are. Ruby’s in no real position to argue, nor does she likely have an argument. So the best thing to do, until she can think of something better, is to go along with it and try to help the people. Yes, she is lying as Ozpin did. Some have argued how she didn’t technically lie since the train crash did happen and she did tell Ironwood what Ozpin told them, just as he asked. But it’s STILL not being truthful. She’s telling half-truths. She’s giving answers that she knows are false. Now I will say that this isn’t exactly like with Oz. Ruby is only lying to Ironwood and has a valid reason to do so, along with having very little time to think of much else. As she said before going in, they had to be careful with what they said, and she was. Oz lied and it wasn’t without reason, but he did so even without reason and to the people risking their lives for his quest that he didn’t explain the full extent of. Plus unlike Ruby, Oz had years to master the facade. Ruby had to make a split-second choice, and she was clearly uncertain about it in her body movement and in Lindsay’s performance. There is a big difference in this instance and in Ozpin’s instances.

But it’s a slippery slope, isn’t it?

No matter how much you justify it, it’s still lying. It’s doing the same thing that they called Oz out for in V6. I’m not calling Ruby a hypocrite though. Why? Because them doing this? This is a good thing. This is what I wanted to happen. Ruby is now the leader. She has to make difficult choices and face the consequences due to said choices. Previously, she only lead Team RWBY and she didn’t have to make many hard choices then. With Team RNJR, it was more or less the same except not as much since it wasn’t her team technically and when Qrow and Oz came into the picture, she didn’t have to make choices at all. She did as she was told because those who supposedly knew what they were doing were there, But then they were either gone or incapable of doing the job, so she stepped up and despite the setbacks, got them to Atlas with minimal consequence. I mean we just saw here that Ironwood let them free, so that solves that issue.

That’s not going to be so easy now. These choices are going to cause problems. Maybe Ironwood will find out on his own or if he did infact bug them. Maybe Ruby or someone else like Oscar will tell him the truth and he takes it badly. Maybe Ruby says nothing, and it leads to a disaster that she could have prevented if she had spoken up. No matter what route the show goes down, Ruby is about to get another harsh reality lesson, and that is how difficult leadership can be. This isn’t like at Beacon where if she messed up, they could solve it easily. No, this time she’s part of something much more complicated. She has to make the choices that Oz has had to make for centuries. I think that this will help her see where Oz is coming from and allow them to reconcile, but also allow Ruby to see where Oz went wrong and better herself. She’s not just going to understand Oz, but she’s going to become better than Oz. But that’s going to come with a lot of hardship, and it is something that she will have to deal with. Not just with herself, but chances are, with her team as well…

Okay, that’s enough on harsh and complicated topics. This is our general set-up episode, and it does a very good job! We have the plan for the arc established, setting up Amity Colosseum for launch and in the meantime doing work around Atlas and Mantle with Ace-Ops. We get to see Atlas Academy, and it looks gorgeous. We get to properly see Winter again, and Weiss hugging her just melted my heart. Makes me worry about later considering Winter’s loyalty to Ironwood and Weiss clearly not liking what’s happening, but still, I’ll take the happy for now. Penny was a delight, especially with the tour, which excellent animation there! Man, it’s just a joy to have her back~! Forest was fun and we learn about Robyn Hill and her group from him, which will likely come into play later. Especially since we can confirm that she’s going up against Jaques for council. That’s… gonna be interesting, to put it lightly.

This was Kiersi Buckhart’s first episode as a writer, and she nailed it! The exposition wasn’t boring and the characters felt very strong here, Ironwood especially. You know that he’s making bad choices, but the writing makes you understand why and that and Jason Rose’s’ performance as Ironwood was genuine with his views. I could understand all of these decisions, even if I don’t agree, and that’s what makes for good and compelling drama. It was strong in the character department and the pacing, os good job Kiersi! Connor Pickens directed the episode, and it looks excellent! Especially for all the camera angles as Watts walks through Mantle. Like when he steps into a puddle with the reflection of Ironwood on screen? Excellence!. Great job Connor~!

Speaking of that scene though… yeah, that was dark. No idea who Tyrian killed, maybe some kind of informant or something that's no longer needed. But man, what a grim (no pun intended) scene to end on. But it establishes the threat very well. Tyrian we all know is not a force to be taken lightly. But neither is Watts. He did his job in Mistral perfectly, and that only failed because of Cinder taking control and keeping Watts out of it after the new plan was made. But he’s the one in charge now and he is in his wheelhouse now. He has control over Mantle’s security, and if he could break Atlas’ before, he can probably do it again. And remember the Election Map that he had in the opening. IDK what the plan is, but with Watts heading it, it's gonna be bad. Add that with Tyrian, and we indeed have a lethal combination. Will our heroes be able to stop it? Only time will tell…

Chapter Three Predictions

It’s all but guaranteed that this is when we’ll get the new outfits, the haircuts, ad the new gear. It’ll probably be a bit of a lighter episode and maybe allow some nice character stuff and maybe even see the Ace-Ops more or see more around the Academy. But I do think that Ruby may have a bit of conflict as a follow-up to here. Remember the line in the trailer about her being uncertain about if the best thing is right? Well… IDK who she was talking to. Could be Oscar. Could be her team. Could be Qrow. IDK, but I imagine that it may very well bein this episode. Either someone confronts her (which judging by his expressions might be Oscar) or someone sees that something is wrong and get her to talk. Maybe it’s even part of some talk where Ruby expresses her uncertainty but tries to get spirits lifted and ignore her own conflicts as she normally does. Either scenario is possible.

Still, I imagine that it will be a lighter episode with some fun hijinks and maybe some emotional like Blake getting her haircut… or hilarious if they play up Jaune’s horrible haircut. Maybe we could get a bit of a glimpse into stuff with Robyn and the election or we see the Schnees again or something else. I think that it might end with the scenes in the trailer of the girls jumping out of the plane, ready for a mission, and it will lead to the scenes of everyone fighting in the mines that’ll cross into Chapter 4. Either way, as I said, we’re at least guaranteed the upgrades next volume and those are gonna be fun~! I can’t wait~!!!

Episode Stats

Favorite Character: Ruby Rose Favorite Scene: Penny’s Tour Least Favorite Scene: The airlift to Atlas, the lighting looked kinda off to me… Forest was a delight though. Favorite Voice Actor: Jason Rose (James Ironwood) Favorite Animation: Final scene in Mantle. The camera angle when Watts is walking through Mantle in the rain were amazingly done, especially with Ironwood's reflection in the puddle. Final Ranking: 9/10

Final Thoughts

This chapter was fantastic! It’s a setup episode done very well. We learn all that we need to know for now, and it works with strong character personalities. It was funny, it was heartwarming, but most of all it was intense. THere’s a lot of good, compelling drama here and sets up so much for later on with Ruby, Ironwood, the villains, and the plans for Atlas. There’s a lot that’s coming, and if it’s already this intense then I can’t imagine how the remaining 11 chapters are gonna be. But I’m ready for it… I hope… still, great chapter!

#rwby #rwby7 #rwby reviews #callie reviews

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akabrookiej04-blog · 4 years

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K-Pop unpopular opinions

So this is my first post on Tumblr. Cool.

ME AND THE K-POP GENRE

First thing first, why I like K-pop.

K-pop is not my favorite genre in today’s scene, my favorite genres are Rock, Metal and Alternative. As y’all can see, I’m emo and a hard-die fan of MCR and in general, I love emo groups as P!ATD, Fall out Boy, etc. I also do like a lot of metal and alternative bands, as Rammstein, Metallica, Alice In Chains, Ghost (ik a lot of people don’t like them, but idc I f*ckin love them), Coldplay, Foals, Glass Animals, Alt-J and I can say a lot more, but I don’t think I need to. So as you can see, my favorites genres have nothing to do with K-pop, so let me tell you how I entered this world.

So all of this happened in the summer of 2018 when I just came from Dublin, you know, the moment school has ended and you go traveling with your friends and all that stuff. Still remember it as one of the best experiences in my life tho.

So there I was, again in my country, with nothing to do, bored af, listening to the same music again and again. And I was so tired of listening to the same songs again and again.

I was listening to “No Drama” by Tinashe and Offset on Youtube when “Fake Love” by BTS appeared in my recommended. I was really bored and wanting to die, so I told myself, “why not”.

And yeah... I spent 4 hours listening to BTS music. It was amusing tho.

By the end of the summer, I was an Army, I knew a lot of K-pop groups, I was into that sh*t. I started with BTS, then Blackpink, Twice, NCT, Red Velvet, Exo... I started with the same as people my age and k-popers in 2019.

At first in k-pop, I was so amused that I liked everything I was seeing, but, you get more experienced and you start to like other things and to dislike some you did love at first.

Now that I’m a little more experienced, I can tell my favorite groups are 2NE1, 4minute, f(x), Big Bang, Dreamcatcher and well, BTS (even tho lately I had been having encountered ideas about them).

But still, I like being honest to myself and I have my opinions. I moved on to other genres like metal and grunge etc. and I left k-pop to the side tbh. Some of the groups that I did like at first now they’re not my sh*t, I find some things kinda annoying now and as consequence I dislike some songs that I used to love.

Now that the introduction is done, and I don’t have anything else to say, let’s start.

These are my opinions, and if you have others I still respect them bro, so respect mines. Let’s get it.

MY K-POP UNPOPULAR OPINIONS

1. Aegyo and cute concepts are cringey.

Dude, 20-year-olds acting like babies is just annoying. These kinda 12-years-old voices that some idols have to fake is just... For example, Rosé from Blackpink. Man, let her sing with her real voice. Being brutally honest, cute concept choreos are all the same, they just don’t tell me anything. The thing I hate the most is that for these concepts some idols are forced to wear clothes that ain’t their style... So annoying, dude. (Groups that follow these concepts and I just don’t like as much as I used to, are Twice and Loona)

2. I think that interviews in English are boring if only one member knows how to speak English. They are idols, they should know at least the basics to communicate. Having to watch and listen to just one idol trying their best to communicate while the others are just doing the m*therfucker ain’t that funny.

3. Dating bans are stupid, they are used as a way to keep fans following their idol. Because if a fan knows their idol is dating it makes them seem unavailable. To childish fans (or most k-popers) being able to dream of dating and marrying their idol it’s more appealing to bias someone and continue dreaming a non-existent future. Real fans don’t care about the dating life of an idol, so they should be able to do whatever the f*ck they want.

4. Sexy concepts and badass ones are the best, fight me.

From what I heard from Korea, the racism and how conservative and close-minded some koreans are, I think these concepts break a Lil’ the rules. Idols like CL, songs as Hate (4minute), Jessi, Hyuna, etc. break korean schemes and rules, and they make me reset my faith in humanity like, come on bro, we all can be open-minded, live and let other people live.

Also, I think that these concepts have the best choreos, aggresive choreos are just so cool, and as well as they have the best instrumentals, noisy ones are just f*cking awesome, change my mind. The fact that they show 20-years-old as mature, strong people is just high-quality stuff. (Groups that blow my mind with this concepts are for example Ateez and Dreamcatcher)

5. Loona stans are so annoying with their “stan Loona”. B*tches, stop being so annoying. If we don’t want to stand your group we’re not gonna, stop that bullsh*t. Anyway, I’m not hating on Loona or her non-psycho fans.

6. Red Velvet lasts songs, Zimzalabim and Umpah Umpah are just messy. Their recent concepts are messy, they look uncomfortable in their clothes and the choreos ain’t that good neither. Hope their next comeback is better tho, they have the potential to do it.

7. Mamamoo are the real queens of k-pop, people should stop sleeping on them, they’re are amazing and their personalities are brilliant. On stage they are one of the best groups so far, their voices are just so stable and powerful. They have the potential to be as big as Blackpink or BTS, so y’all should stop sleeping on them, homies.

8. There are so many Twice songs that sound the same. Feel Special is not that much of a bop tho, and they have a lot of songs that are just simply a miss. Sorry, my dudes. I think a more mature concept would fit them so well, with a more powerful instrumental, with that, they would conquer the k-pop world.

9. Chung Ha’s songs ain’t that good. Snappin’ aesthetic is gorgeous, the concept is so attractive, but the song itself it’s boring. She’s pretty, she knows how to dance, her aesthetic is f*ckin’ awesome, but I feel like her songs need smth to spice them up. They need that smth that they don’t have to turn them to bops. (Also I hate Chica with all my life, that song just gets me on my nerves).

10. Y’all are gonna hate me with this one, but I think BAAM and BBoom BBoom ain’t the same. Like man, it’s true they sound alike, but to me, they have such different vibes. BBoom BBoom it’s amusing and cheerful, has this kinda vibes that make you wanna dance, and BAAM has this kinda nostalgic, melancholic vibe in the sound of the song that sets your heart on fire. That’s the way I find them, it’s my opinion.

11. I know y’all have been waiting for this moment. Let’s talk about BTS. Armys, say whatever the f*ck you want, but as a real one, I’m gonna spill the tea. Their music now is worse, too commercial and doesn’t transmit any feeling. Come on, let’s admit it dudes, is the reality.

Boy With Luv ain’t good. Halsey is a good singer with so much potential, Nightmare and Without Me are pretty good examples of this, and they did her so dirty. Also, the lyrics are just cringey. I don’t know about you, but Come be my teacher and your one, your two, don’t say anything to me. In general, I feel like Map Of The Soul: Persona ain’t that good of an album. They could’ve used the concept of Dionysus in all the album, I don’t know, something like greek gods flexin’ their money in all the album, and it could’ve be such a bomb. Make it Right, Home and Dionysus are the only remarkable songs of the album, the rest are just meh, I could listen to them 200 times and they won’t stick to me, they’re just basic and boring. They have changed, my dudes. I feel like they’re not who they were once anymore. It’s a fact that they slay on stage and their voices are stable (not all of their voices tho). Their concerts are bomb, the choreos are amazing and that’s something we cannot deny. (But the inflatable castle for Anpanman was a no for me). In conclusion, their music now is just commercial basic pop, they should try to mix their old sounds with smth new.

Well, my dudes, I have more opinions on k-pop but you know, I think this is long enough, in the future I will make a second part of this, but for now, this is all.

Tell me your opinions if you want, and if not it’s also okay.

That’s all folks, bye.

- Brooke.

#kpop #opinion

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svt-energyskincare · 6 years

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“fruit boy?”

ten? the boy whom hates fruits w a fuming flame? what happens when he meets the girl who works at the local juice bar? hMMmm (warning: this is about to be the most cheesiest+extrA thing ever but omg bUT IDC LESGOOO LOL)

✭ ten is a man who despises fruits more than anything in his life

✭ this is literally fact #6 in the 1st chapter of the FACT BOOK

✭ i mean everybody and their momma’s know that ten despises fruits, he can drink fruit juice, but if it’s raw fruit ….. bye sweetie!

✭ he was the kid that always picked fries instead of fruits for the side in his happy meal

✭ and tbh, he’ll always be like that at heart

✭ but his best friend johnny literally is the opposite

✭ kiddo who would always order the fruits, and even snatched the fruit in other’s happy meal when they weren’t looking, the fries who ?? kid

✭ and tbh, he’ll always be like that at heart too

✭ so whenever johnny and ten had a day of rehearsing or recording ahead of them w the rest of da boys, they would almost always make a stop at the local juice bar in the morning

✭ which of course, always resulted in a thicc groan from ten bc where’s the green tea

✭ which always resulted in a retort from johnny saying “well they have gReeN aPple smOoThiEs iF yOu aCtuAlLy liKed fRuitS”

✭ they always had (yes, h a d) to go to that particular juice bar because not only was it convenient since the sm building was right next to it

✭ but also to avoid them having to buy completely new phones bc the rest of the boys were actually blowing their phones up if they didn’t get what they wanted, which johnny didn’t want bc the boy’s already dropped his phone enough give him a break boys lol:(

✭ doyoung: guys, are you at the juice bar?

✭ ten: no

✭ johnny: no

✭ renjun: no i saw them leave!

✭ ten: RENJUN

✭ johnny: no guys we’d have to drive like 30 minutes back to get your drinks

✭ renjun: ah c’mon we’ll get you guys walkers if you get us some

✭ chenle: LOLOL

✭ renjun: get it? cause they’re old hAHAH

✭ kun: i feel attacked and that wasn’t even for me

✭ winwin: aw i want some smoothies :(

✭ haechan: what’s manager hyung’s number again? hmm..

✭ ten+johnny: …….

✭ ten+johnny: ………..

✭ ten+johnny: ……………… fine

✭ mark: can i get a banana smoothie!

✭ doyoung: could i get caramel americano pls n thx

✭ yuta: but they don’t have those

✭ doyoung: wHA

✭ taeyong: yogurt smoothie!

✭ ot7: oh! could i-

✭ ten+johnny: oKAY

✭ as for johnny and ten, if they didn’t already cop their coffee elsewhere, they would always order the same ol thing and luckily, this place was one of those places that was technically a juice bar, buuuuut ofc it had other stuff like milkshakes, smoothies, etc- but hey not complaining thO

✭ so johnny’s usual: tbh he doesn’t have 1 bc when i tell u that the boy is a full on beverage (and coffee) connoisseuR-

✭ ten’s usual: a plain yogurt smoothie with 2 lil muffins (well actually it’s not really a muffin … it’s lowkey a lil cupcake but ten likes to call it muffin, so if he says it’s a muffin, muffin it is amirite)

✭ and usually the workers at the place memorized their orders AND the rest of the members by now bc of how often they came, so they wouldn’t even have to tell em! would ya look at that

✭ however on this particular day, there was one worker who had never looked so confused in her whole life

✭ who is this confused as hELL gal u ask????

✭ correct! yes sweetie, it’s you :’)

✭ it was your first shift at the juice bar and honestly you were sO NERVOUS

✭ but luckily, your coworkers were p chill and nice and willing to help you out whenever you needed !! yay 4 friendly coworkers

✭ you were spacing out, listening to the music they had faintly playing in the background as you waited for the first customers to come in for what felt like forever

✭ well, it was 6am afterall

✭ snapping you out of your daydream or morning dream whatever tf you wanna call it, your coworker eagerly shook the absolute hell out of your arm and started whisper-yelping

✭ ”oh my god they’re back!”

✭ ”what? who?”

✭ ”oh my god! this is the best morning of my life!”

✭ “you’re freaking me out what are y-”

✭ “joHNNY AND TEN ARE-”

✭ before you could ask anything else, literally all your coworkers scrambled to their stations and started making smoothies like their life depended on it and you’re like uhhHHH wtf are y’all doiN

✭ but that’s when you glanced up at the two boys walking in, and you honestly were stunned for a hot minute

✭ you knew who they were, of course you did, everyone did are u KIDDING

✭ but you literally wanted to pinch yourself because they legitimately looked like WALKING 3D SIMS W/ ALL THE PRETTY CC LOL

✭ prettiest boys you’ve ever seen with your own two eyes? you betcha!

✭ they weren’t even looking at the menu, but rather their phones and you could hear them groan lmAo and believe me you tried your best not to stare at them, but your eyes were like what did u say? disregard what u just said and continue to stare? okay!

✭ luckily a few moments later, they finally stopped groaninG and went to the front to order

✭ ”good morning! what can i get for you?” you asked johnny w the biggest smile you could muster up from your immense lack of sleep from the first day nerves… and oh! also! how could i forget, the iNTENSE nervousness of talking to these 2 sims lmao

✭ there was a silence in the air bc your coworkers were trying to stop from revealing their giddyness, but tragically failing which made johnny and ten lose focus and laugh ever so cutelY about it

✭ ”i’ll have a strawberry milkshake wiiiith….” johnny said, tapping his finger on the counter debating whether or not if it was too early for a sugar rush (also yes, he did just order a milkshake at 6 in the morning. did someone say ICON)

✭ ”whipped cream?” you asked which made johnny bust out the biggest smile

✭ ”how’d you know!”

✭ ”oh come on, a shake without whipped cream? that even sounds wrong”

✭ ”you read my mind!” johnny said in between laughs and handed you the amount of money for the coffee

✭ at this point tbh you didn’t feel that nervous anymore surprisingly, like something about johnny just made you feel sO comfy?? he was so friendly and welcoming bIH HE’S AMAZIN

✭ and yup, just when you thought your nerves were gonna pack their bags and go tf home ….. ten pops out from behind johnny like one of those wind up toys w/ the jumpscare just waiting to happen

✭ as soon as you saw him, your nerves literally said LMAO U THOUGHT, OUR FLIGHT ISN’T UNTIL TOMORROW

✭ you finally met eyes with him, and you swear to gOD that he hypnotized you

✭ what were those …. galaxies in his eyes ??? they sparkled just like the stars did

✭ and little did u know, ten was like muffin who ??? he didn’t even know what the hell that was, he was too busy thinking about how pretty u weRE

✭ also did i mention that ten is literally your biggest crush? no? OOPS OK ANYWAYS

✭ ”s-sorry” you managed to blurt out with the shyest smile ever, followed by regret bc you realized you lowkey blew your cover lol

✭ ”what can i get for you?”

✭ ”i’ll have 2 double chocolate chip muffins please” he said with the cutest smile ugh

✭ “oh and one of those macaroons! the chocolate one” he added, standing on his tippytoe’s to point over the glass im:(((

✭ ten’s smile never left his face and the more you looked at him, you noticed how confident n not shy he was, so you were like HHHHokay y/n, you gotta step tf UP DON’T U DARE TURN INTO A RED ASS APPLE

✭ oh and speaking of apples

✭ just a lil after you took ten’s order, you heard footsteps coming up from behind you

✭ you’d recognize those scary high heel clicks anywhere hHH your manager was coming to check on how you were doing

✭ and with a cringe to your eyebrows, you huffed and gave in before you could get in trouble on your first day

✭ ”oh, would you guys like to try our new morning … madness smoothie?” you asked them as u could practically feel the manager burning a hole into your head by how intensely they were glaring at yoU

✭ oof you cringed at the damn name of the thing, they sure did notice and started piecing 2 and 2 together

✭ just when you thought you’d done your part of promos, your manager “AHEM”’d you, signaling that you, indeed, were wrong again

✭ “uh- it has strawberries, apples, oranges-”

✭ as you were listing the painstakingly lengthy ingredients to them, ten’s expression changed from that cute lil smile, to an almost in pained, scared look?? OMG

✭ but to your surprise when you were done reciting the declaration of independence, he piped up with a quick ”sure!”

✭ both you and johnny looked at each other with this shook (is that still a thing?bye) expression at his sudden excited tone, johnny looking more “what the fick???” than you were

✭ before you could even say anything, ten slid over his money to a very much confused you, nodding with a look that read ‘go ahead hun’ :’(

✭ you did your thang on the register, and in the bg you could hear your manager walking back into the back-room, which made you make an obvious huff of relief

✭ ”dude why’d you order that?” you managed to hear johnny whisper to ten

✭ ”mm?”

✭ ”you-”

✭ ”hyung, shhh it’s okay” ten said a lil too loud

✭ ”hm?” you piped in, curious as to why they were bickering in asmr

✭ you noticed ten patting johnny’s back, but almost in a way where he was like ‘don’T SPILL THE TEA’ you know what i mean? but they both just shook their heads to you w/ a smile, reassuring you it was ‘nothing’

✭ as you and your coworkers worked on their orders, ngl you’d occasionally glance over at them and it legit looked like they were sharing some kinda juicy secreT bc whenever you’d look, johnny always had this cheeky smile on his face looking at ten

✭ after you finished their orders and your coworkers finished the rest of the memorized members orders, you called them up to get them in which they hurriedly rushed to the counter in the softest way (idk how them walking could be soft BUT IT IS)

✭ ”thank you!” they said in unison, making the lil awk tension break again

✭ they grabbed their drinks and food which made u kinda :( bc when will u see them again -sigh-

✭ ten looked at his phone, checking the time you assumed bc when he put his phone back in his pocket he looked #panickedt

✭ ”ah hyung we’re gonna be late. well, thanks again!” ten said to you, definitely not forgetting to shoot you another heart clenching smile

✭ “thank you, have a nice day guys!” you smiled back

✭ then you shared that same look from before, all heart stricken and iSH OOF, ten had to snap out of it quick or else the rest of the members would kick his booty for being late

✭ ten wasn’t one to be shy of showing his feelings, like he absolutely thought you were beautiful and he couldn’t help but lük, but the manager was gonna pop off if they didn’t leave so-

✭ ”you go ahead, i gotta get the straws real quick” johnny called out to him before the door closed to the juicery

✭ you handed him a straw from behind the counter to him, which he shook his head at ??????

✭ bih u were confused as hecc

✭ johnny gave you this certain look and you just knew what it meant, see from the get-go y’all had a bond!1

✭ johnny sensed the tension between you and ten the second he ordered, like it was undeniably obvious and he knew you knew, and you knew that he knew, and he knew that you knew that he-

✭ that look he gave you gave that away rip!

✭ you stood there like hhhhh what what wh-

✭ he laughed and leaned over the counter, and in the most nonchalant, yet all-telling tone he said:

✭ ”he doesn’t like fruit”

✭ and with a smirk and a wave, he was outtie

✭ BIH YOU WERE LIKE ??!!? but realistically telling yourself like ‘huh well that’s odd, wonder why he bought it then’ and ‘he probably got it for johnny’

✭ at first you really didn’t think anything of it other than the fact that he was trying 2 be a sweetie pie, but your coworkers who so eagerly were bombarding you with screenshots in your work gc (they were your mini nct skhH) strongly disagreed

✭ what were these screenshots you ask?? well-

✭ ‘Y/N’

✭ ‘Y/N ANSWERRR’

✭ ‘WHAT, WHAT I MISS’

✭ ‘YOU’RE LITERALLY VIRAL’

✭ ‘WHAT’

✭ ‘HAVE YOU BEEN ON TWITTER’

✭ ‘NO WTF’

✭ (3 attachments: screenshots of tweets saying:)

“OP was at the juice bar earlier and saw Johnny and Ten! 😭 They said that the girl asked if they wanted a fruit smoothie, and Ten said yes!”

“OMG ten ordered fruit????? he doesn’t do that?????”

“life goal: to be the cashier at the juice bar who literally got ten to buy a fruit smoothie”

✭ ‘WHAT IS THIS I DON'T GET IT’

✭ ‘dude… they literally think ten has a crush on you’

✭ ‘LOL’

✭ ‘WE’RE SERIOUS, JUST GO ON TWITTER’

✭ and your mini nct’s weren’t lying… literally your mentions were blowing tf up with a bunch of “omg! found her @” and “girl wtf you’re famous”

✭ but like….. you still didn’t get why people thought he had a crush on you based on that little interaction because it just was so minisicule to you, but as if twitter was trying to virtually smack you in the face, the tweets starting flowing in again

✭ this time, about people’s conversations with ten at a recent fansign omg

✭ “OP asked Ten about why he got fruit at the juice bar, and he just looked at her and smiled, and said ‘shhhhh’?”

✭ “OP asked Ten if he liked fruit now since he recently bought some, and he replied immediately ‘no no no, of course not’ ?!”

✭ one word…… WHY

✭ not only did you have all these tweets flowing in to convince you otherwise, you just remembered what johnny said to you before he left and nOW you’re like ……. okay what tf is up, it’s just fruit what is going on, why and where-

✭ oof you just couldn’t wrap your head around as to why it was such a big deal online, and it was truly bugging you and it’s not like you could ask them again what he meant

✭ 1, because you were too shy n nervous to

✭ 2, because you didn’t know if they would come back to the shop

✭ deep sighs all around my dude :(((

✭ those two always went to that shop, mostly in the mornings you heard

✭ and since you’d been working a little under a month there now, your boss started to schedule you for shifts where you didn’t need a supervisor anymore, which were 12 times out of 10 in the evening bc they were always lacking on those shifts

✭ so honestly, you haven’t worked a morning shift since your first day, the day you saw ya boys

✭ ........... (yes u knew this was comin)

✭ until one of your coworkers had to call off last minute on their shift and you were the worker they called in, that is ;))))

✭ boi when u got the call to come in, you got so !!!!! because what if you saw them again

✭ you missed them, johnny was so funny and you felt like you guys got along so easily almost instantly

✭ and ten, he’d always been your crush even before you talked to him, so that whole thing- your heart never failed to yodEl whenever you thought about him

✭ yes, they were idols, and yes you had been a fan, yes the encounters were short and probably seemed small to others

✭ but you couldn’t help it, ya know?

✭ anywho, the morning came for you to take on that shift and man were u nervous lmao

✭ when you got to work, literally only one other coworker was there with you

✭ as soon as you flipped that sign on the door from closed to open, OOO IT WAS GAME TIME

✭ the game plan: if they come back, try your best to ask them, i mean u gotta at least try, especially since the whole twitter thing AND let’s not forget why johnny felt the need to tell you what he did, you hAd to know

✭ the morning went slow, and it was raining too, so it was slower than usual since rainy days were obviously chill in dayzzz

✭ so you just tidied up around the place and waited, even did that thing people do in the movies where they look out the window while it’s raining while a slow song is playing in the bg …… except you were just staring out the window from the counter to the pop that was playing in the shop lol

✭ it wasn’t until mid 7 am that people started coming where you could finally stop acting like you were in a dilemma in the newest drama

✭ it was pretty steady then, you took orders, made them, served them, then tidied up, daydreamed out the window, basically on repeat for the rest of your shift

✭ you were on lunch break FINALLY, you swore u were gonna pass out from boredom if you heard the same pop song you daydreamed to three times already

✭ you sat along the chairs on the side of the shop, just sipping your drink, going through your phone awaiting the time for your rinse and repeat routine to get back into play *sigh*

✭ the quiet aura of the shop suddenly got interrupted as the bell rang chAoTically, followed by the squeakiest footsteps

✭ ”hyung, we shoulda brought two umbrellas”

✭ ”it’s not my fault i was blessed with this heavenly height”

✭ ”oof”

✭ your head perked up as you heard those voices, those familiar voiceS U MISSED :(

✭ you looked over and there you saw them :(

✭ ten and johnny :( right there :(

✭ their hair was just a little dampened from the rain, little water droplets on their cheeks, and their typical banter :(

✭ then all of a sudden you remembered the pact you made to yourself; “if you see them again, you gotta at least try to ask them” or else you’d forever be mAd at yourself

✭ the thing is, how tf are you gonna get their attention ??

✭ like do you just walk up to them like ‘hey!!!’ ??? like you weren’t even sure if they even would remember you omg

✭ oh lordt you could hear their voices getting closer and closer, why did it have to be raining and why did people have to camp out here for the free wiFI, there were like 5 seats open and they just so happened to be next to you wHY

✭ next thing ya know, you heard them sit to the side of you, just a few seats down

✭ ”where are they?”

✭ ”dunno, they said they’re coming”

✭ ”they said that 10 minutes agO”

✭ ”aish lucas”

✭ then again, you heard the door push open abruptly like an emergency and then another squeaky shoe sliding across the floor

✭ …. and sure as hell that was lucas and also a cheerful haechan following him

✭ they looked around adorably confused, probably looking for the 2 sims to ur rigHT

✭ you were trying not to glance at them but ugh timing ficking hates u! so when you looked up, they were already on their way to johnny and ten to the side of you

✭ when you looked up, lucas looked at you and he immediately smiled like his whole being softened a bit which made you uwu!

✭ but haechan on the other hand kinda froze in his tracks, and glanced crazy fast back and forth between you and behind you

✭ there were no words exchanged, but rather looKs exchanged bc haechan was looking at you with a look that he knows what’s going on, whATEVER THAT IS

✭ you couldn’t see it but ten and johnny were both confused as ever too, but now you could feel their stares burning into your fricken back just like your manager’s that day they came in sksk

✭ they literally actually gasped and scooted their chairs out

✭ ”hey!!! long time no see!!” johnny pops up in front of you with the biggest smile

✭ ”we’ll get the stuff ready in the car. meet us kay?” they all scurried out way too obviously quick, they didn’t even order yet i’m skAHAH

✭ leaving you and ten to each other on the benches in this tension of silence

✭ yes you heard me right, JUST you and ten

✭ these sneaky boys smh

✭ you and ten shared a mutual “???!!?” how obv could it be sksjdjdif

✭ ”so-”

✭ ”hey-”

✭ you both cut each other off which caused you to blush the same way you both did that day AWW

✭ you weren’t sure if ten would even know about how big your guys’ lil interaction became bc you weren’t sure if he even checked the internet

✭ but oh honey, he was all aware.. the amount of times it was brought up at the fansigning!1

✭ in a panic to fill the awkward silences that was inevitable to happen, you nervously and impulsively blurted out ”so, how come you don’t like fruit?” omGF

✭ he just started chEESIN and laughing to himself and you were like ???!!!

✭ “i couldn’t help myself!”

✭ “how come?”

✭ “you know!”

✭ “no, what is it!”

✭ “ah no, you know” he started teasing you omg

✭ “ten :(“ (yes you could hear the frown in your tone loL)

✭ “wah, you know my name?” he clutched his heart and leaned back like the drama queen he is

✭ “hey! don’t change subject!”

✭ but no matter how many times you asked, this baby would just sip his drink and give you the look (which by the way, your coworkers were on iT like, they brought out his drink as soon as the others left im???)

✭ yes, you know what look i’m talking about. the one where his eyebrows wiggle, and he’s staring at you like he knows some piping tea sister!

✭ he isn’t gonna budge, he’s taking that one to the grave, but honestly he just is teasing you because he really has 0 problem with telling you that he really got the fruit because he thought you were really pretty and he noticed you were getting nervous bc of your manager behind you and he didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable, so he bought it despite his hatred for fruiT , but he just thought it was cute how huffy you got JSJS

✭ and ten is def one to pick up a fruit cup, pose for a pic with it, and then immediately drop it, shaking his head in TERROR

✭ so yes, someone who doesn’t like fruit bought a fruit smoothie, maybe it’s no biggie.... but if it’s at the level of fear as ten???

✭ the difference is stARK

✭ interrupting your back in forth playful nagging chat with ten, in popped a hurried haechan with his head peeking out the front door

✭ “hyung, could you hurry up and talk to your girl, manager hyung is going to yell at us!”

✭ “haechan!”

✭ “hyung i’m sorry but we gotta-”

✭ “okay byebye~”

✭ both of you froze in your place as haechan closed the door and rushed back to the car, where you could see johnny and lucas peering over at you guys, motioning to ten omf

✭ you built up the courage to look at ten to see his reaction and he was not having it sksk this boy was literally glaring at haechan through the window like ‘wait til we get to the studio’

✭ and as if things couldn’t get anymore chaotic … in comes your manager saying “y/n could you hurry up and talk to your boyfriend later? your lunch ended 5 minutes ago” FJSKF

✭ you didn’t even want to see what his reaction was, you were so embarrassed but ugh even in your time of trauma, those were the CUTEST lil laughs you’ve ever heard

✭ but before your boss would come back and fire you, you rushed over behind the counter and took ten’s order, two double chocolate chip “muffin’s” and a little yogurt smoothie again :’)

✭ you did your thang as the lil hard worker you are, and when it came to writing his name on the side of the cup… you were like.. ‘hm okay, since ten wants to be all cute n shit… two can play at that game’

✭ your sneaky self smiled and quickly signed it with a smug, proud look on your face which made ten go ???!!! girl what did u do

✭ you gave it to ten and he thankfully smiled, sipping it as if to test run it first

✭ he did that thing where something tastes so good you start reading out the ingredients on the side of the box or dancing as you’re chewing lol he even exaggerated it a bit because he thinks your smile is so prettY

✭ ”fruit boy?” he read off the writing you on the side of the cup

✭ ”mhm”

✭ ”me?”

✭ ”mhmmm”

✭ “why is there a heart?”

✭ you were trying your best to mimic how ten was so confidently teasing you earlier by not letting you know the answer, but you were failing because even looking at him made your heart do the tHING, so all that came out of your mouth was the most flustered “u-uhhHhHh”

✭ “wahhh, someone’s blushing”

✭ “hey!”

✭ there was that pretty smile again as he looked at the little heart you put beside it along w/ a smiley face, but he never was one to blush, instead it was you w your red cheeks and red ears aWW

✭ in the same confident tone, even leaning closer, shaking his finger at you saying “gwiyeo”

✭ this boy was so happy seeing how flustered you were SMH, that same cheeky smile never left his face im-

✭ you guys were so focused on each other and being playful w each other to actually notice that people were looking at you guys all crazY, and if they weren’t then they were deffo taking pics bc honey you both were giggling and lightly nudging each other

✭ idk what was with you and these nct boys, but you felt comfortable with them easily… like ten made you BEYOND nervous but you still felt like you’ve been knew him???

✭ which was probably why so many people were gonna take your guys’ interaction further than just the normal now, especially with how red your cheeks got and how sly ten’s smile was

✭ you loved that little sly smirk of his and his playful nature, and he adored how blushy your cheeks got whenever he looked at you a little too long

✭ and honestly, you didn’t even need to say that to each other, with the look in your guys’ eyes??? oh c’mon

✭ “you still need to tell me why yo-“

✭ “mmm-mmm” he sing-songed, sipping his lil drink

✭ “tEN”

✭ “neh?”

✭ “ten!”

✭ “fine. guess”

✭ “no tell me!”

✭ “mmmmm…. that’s not fun”

✭ “uGH”

184 notes · View notes

blodkru · 6 years

Text

You Promised

This is my first 100 fic of any kind. Can be read as platonic or romantic Bellarke idc. It’s set between O and Clarke finding Bellamy and Madi with the Flame. Before Clarke and Madi leave. Just a scene I need.

Word count: 1536

______________________________________________________________

Blodreina gave them five minutes to talk.

Blodreina- not Octavia. Clarke had come to make a clear distinction between the two. With all the hate and anger in her eyes, Clarke wasn’t sure how much of Octavia was left. Just enough to give her a few minutes to speak to her brother. Her brother, who she was sending into the pits.

He’s sat before her in a chair, arms bound behind him. Back in the bunker. He can’t meet her eyes even though she refused to look away from him. This man she had once thought a King by her side, a God even to his people, couldn’t even meet her eyes or speak. He once called her Princess as a joke. He had once called her enemy with spite. Had even called her Wanheda with anger. She supposed that’s who he saw now. Not Clarke, the girl who led the 100 to the ground with him. But Wanheda; the woman hell bent on destroying those who endangered her family. Endangered Madi.

And he’d done just that.

He promised to keep her safe. Clarke was so sure she was going to die and welcomed death like the friend it had once been. Madi would be safe with what was left of the 100. With Harper, Monty, Raven. Hell, even Emori, Echo, and Murphy. Especially with Murphy. Clarke had once thought the two would get along amazingly. But she knew Madi would be safe as long as Bellamy kept his promise. He hated breaking promises, so things should have worked out well. Except Bellamy had a nasty habit of breaking promises. Clarke was far too familiar with that.

She tried not to hold it against him. He was always doing what he thought was right. Whatever the hell he wanted.

“Madi’s talking like a commander.” It’s the first thing said in the too echoey room. Her arms are crossed over her chest and she’s blocked the doorway. Not that he’d be able to get out anyways. Or get past her. They may not have seen each other for six years, but she remembers every single one of his weak spots. Not to mention she’s been training every day. Every day and night that the nightmares won’t go away, and the fear won’t let her breathe. She’s sure he has too.

“Thanks to you.” Her eyes never leave his face. “You promised me you would take care of her. That she would be safe.” Her tone is coming out like a mother scolding her child. She’s spoken to Madi like this countless times. It’s not far off from the voice that made people start calling her the commander of death. “You promised me, Bellamy. And you did the one damn thing I didn’t want her to do.” She doesn’t realize her voice is getting higher and with every word he’s shutting his eyes tighter. He knows what he’s done and how she will never forgive him. She probably won’t as long as they’re both alive. “Damnit Bellamy look at me!”

She’s right in his face. Somehow, she’s crossed the room and is standing right in front of him. He still can’t look at her. Clarke isn’t sure what angers her more: what he’s done with the flame or the fact he won’t look at her. He can feel how angry she is. She’s a mama bear trying to protect her cub; it’s a wonder she hasn’t ripped his face off yet.

Spoke to soon. He flinched as a hand is brought hard against his cheek. It makes him open his eyes and for a second he considers kicking out at her, knock her to the ground with him. But the hatred in her eyes is enough to stall him. Gods, it could rival Octavia now. Tears have gathered and threatened to spill over the longer she looked. For a split second, she looked like the terrified eighteen-year-old her had known before. So brave and yet terrified out of her mind. It was the same look she had when she saved them all from the Grounder virus years ago. When they were afraid Raven would die. After she ended Finn’s life. “You promised me!” She was screaming now. “You promised to keep her safe and put that damn chip in her instead! I trusted you!” Each word was a stab to his chest.

Bellamy spat out the tiniest bit of blood that pooled in his mouth. “Blame everyone else, why don’t you.” It wasn’t meant to come out, but it did. They were words meant for someone else, Octavia even, not Clarke. Finally, he met her eyes fully. The words had stung worse than any kick or hit could. “I was doing what I thought was right. The Grounders want a commander, Clarke. They need Madi.” She shook her head the entire time. “You tried to do the same thing with Luna, why is it any different?” Definitely the wrong thing to say. Another slap and his ears were ringing. Bellamy couldn’t recall a time where she had hurt him this much intentionally.

“She is a child. My child, Bellamy. I spent the last six years raising her and assuring her the Flame was never coming back. Never coming for her. And you ruin it in less than a night. You promised.” The double meaning wasn’t lost on him. Something else was meant every time she said he promised. He could feel it in the slight tremble of her voice. Clarke ran a hand through her hair as she choked back tears. “You should have left. You should have taken Madi and the rest of your family and left.” The word was nearly spat.

He jerked in his chair, the restraints digging into his skin. Clarke wasn’t going to understand. He could see that with every breath she took. Madi was right, she would never forgive him. And he hadn’t made it any better with that stupid speech. “I didn’t want to leave you behind. I knew I could fix this. They were almost all rallied behind Madi. Okay? The Grounders-,”

“They aren’t Grounders anymore!” She nearly shrieked as she interrupted. “Okay? There is no more Trikru, Skaikru, or any of the clans. It’s just Wonkru and they are all behind your bloodthirsty sister.” If mental slaps were a thing, that would count as one. He held her gaze as best as he could. She was holding herself back, he could tell with how tense her body was. Clarke couldn’t swallow down the next words she didn’t want to speak. “You left me before, you should have done it again. Should have been easier.” Slap.

“Don’t you dare say that like it was easy! You would have done the exact same thing.” He pulled on the restraints again. “That was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Poisoning O was easier, I at least knew she would live. I spent three years mourning you. I couldn’t even look at anyone on the Arc without breaking down because you. Weren’t. There.” Clarke doesn’t have an answer. Bellamy had mourned her. He thought she was dead, worse than dead. And she had been before she met Madi.

They stare at each other for the remaining thirty seconds they have. Neither can utter a word that wouldn’t harm the other. Clarke supposes this would have happen no matter what. She had forgiven Bellamy for leaving her, but the tiniest part of her couldn’t let go some resentment. She truly thought she was going to die, alone, in that damn bunker. Could Bellamy blame her? Could she blame him for doing what he did? He had been right, she did force the Flame on Luna. She even said herself she would make any Nightblood child she could find take it. The only different with Madi was Clarke had spent time with her. And there had been other options.

The door opened at exactly five minutes since Clarke walked into the room. It creaks and Blodreina is standing there; Miller flanked behind. Her face gives way to nothing as she takes a deep breath. She can’t look at Bellamy. Her eyes purposely stay away from him. “Never thought I’d see the day where you two can’t stand each other.” Clarke narrows her eyes at her. She has to remember this isn’t Octavia anymore. This is Blodreina and she isn’t Clarke to her anymore. She’s Wanheda. “Given how awkward it feels, I assume your talk is done.” She gestures for Clarke to leave the room. She does so.

She looks at Miller for a second. She has to wonder what happened in the bunker to make him so hard. His eyes are dead and his jaw tense. Just as she’s about to walk down the hall, Clarke stops. One more thing to say. She re-enters to room and takes a shaky breath. Her hands are clenched tight enough to hurt. Bellamy is looking at the floor, Blodreina still stood next to him looking a mx of bored and annoyed. They both look at her as she speaks.

“I radioed you every day. For six years. I guess they never made it to you.”

#the 100 #blodkru #fanfic #oneshot #clarke griffin #bellamy blake #octavia blake #blodreina #5x10 #filler #wonkru #the 100 stories #not spoiler #wanheda #madi griffin

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sleepycults · 7 years

Text

My thoughts of Riverdale(again lmao)

sorry this isn't as good(?) as the other one, I'm not feeling the best and I couldn't focus on this episode

•Pop is so innocent and naive, it makes me sad he's in a world full of hurt :'(((

•Archie is me when cooking

•Hermoine and Hiram Lodge are incarnates of the devil himself. They can rot in superhell you hear me?

•You could tell the Tension between Hiram and Veronica was real, AND I KNEW THEY PLAYED HER. THEY GAINED HER TRUST AND WILL BETRAY IT. DID YOU SEE HOW HIRAM THREATENED ARCHIE THERE(the end btw) IM TELLING YOU NOW VERONICA'S GONNA BE IN A WORLD OF HURT IN THE FUTURE EPISODES

•Betty trying to get Archie back into Pop's made me mad. IT'S TOO SOON, THERE'S TRAUMA

•When Keller got that call from Greendale I knew it was about Grundy

•Skeet is hot

•When Cole came in and KJ had the bat, it kinda looked bad. I'm sorry but the acting there wasn't all that.

•Why did Betty look into Archie's room? I get they're neighbors and you can just look through but damn.

•Cami is gorgeous I say it all the time lmao

•I DO NOT like Mayor McCoy. She's too suspect.

•Jughead is playing with the big boys now, he's in deep water. Also FP said 'Snake Charmer' WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??? Is she gonna hurt somebody around him?

•Midge and Reggie have some type of tension lmao imma say it

•REGGIE SELLS DRUGS. That was a turn of events I did not expect

•Can just anybody walk into Riverdale high? Do they have no security? Damn their school is shit

•Jughead was gonna bust FP out. Umm, what? Let's talk about he's willing to do anything for his dad pls

•Y'all see Cheryl. She's so hot. I love her.

•Josie joining the Vixens?? Wooow

•Polly is in school now. Anyone else catch that? I'm surprised that she is. At least they didn't just take her out completely.

•SHE DOESNT EVEN TEACH HERE ANYMORE, WHY WOULD THEY SAY SHE'S DEAD???(I had a teacher die and they didn't make an announcement)

•Archie crying hurts me

•I was expecting a nice Jughead and Cheryl moment but damn, NOPE

•The "An anonymous buyer" part wow. I knew something was off. About it.

•When Jughead and Betty visited Cheryl I knew something was gonna go down. Also that outfit she was wearing? Iconic

•After Jughead and Betty left did you see the look he had? It looked evil

•"Crime of passion" SO WHO KILLED HER?

•Moose and Midge aren't close to Archie so why did they get shot. Something isn't right.

•Now Archie just went through something bad, WHY THE FUCK would Reggie show up in a mask?‬

•I KNEW ARCHIE WAS GONNA GET A GUN, AND DILTON(He's gonna have more screen time something's gonna happen around him)GAVE IT TO HIM. I CALLED IT

•I said Reggie's words would influence and IT DID

•Archie remembered the bow he gave Grundy. That was probably used and can I say when Arch went to Keller about it, I felt so uncomfortable. Like no, stop. He's gonna spill him and GRUNDY'S affair one day

•Betty is always trying to fix things and she needs to stop. She can not fix everything

•CHERYL WAS HOT AF, FULL HOMO, ALL HOMO. 100% GAY YALL.

•I AM NOW ANTI BETTY COOPER, IDC WHAT YALL SAY. DID YALL SEE HOW SHE THREATED CHERYL IN THAT LOCKER ROOM? CHERYL HAS BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH AND YOU WANT TO EXPOSE THE VIDEO LIKE THAT?

•That Veronica and Jughead moment though :') they have dad issues and they're apart of the same core group. Why don't they interact more? Also WHY IS THERE SO MUCH LESS KEVIN?

•Archie thinks he's going crazy. He's not, Archie don't think that :((

•Okay so what is Alice about to do? I feel like she's gonna do something bad. God I hate that woman but I love her

•THET SENT SMITHERS "AWAY" AFTER THE INCIDENT THAT MORNING. I HOPE VERONICA KNOWS HER PARENTS ARE BAD AND WILL NEVER CHANGE

#riverdale spoilers #riverdale #anti Betty Cooper #skeet ulrich #Cheryl blossom #Jughead Jones #veronica lodge #archie andrews #hiram lodge #hermoine lodge #pop tate

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lil-lycanthropy · 7 years

Text

Belong

Words: 5,250 (or something like that)

Parings: None??? This can be read as platonic or romantic idc

Warnings: Angst, Dissociation, Anxiety/Panic Attacks, Nightmares, Flashbacks, slight Blood (nothing gory really), slight Burns (once again, not really bad or anything), Self-Loathing, Negative Thoughts, I think that’s it?

Summary: Everyone’s trying to accept Parker, and Parker is trying hard to be accepted. But the fact of the matter is, he traumatized the sides and they’re not coping well.

Notes: This is for @parkersanders as my SAD entry. It’s late (I’m so sorry) because I’m a depressed procrastinator who has to edit things 434753947 times and rewrite all the chapters. Also sorry it’s so long I have no self control, and go big or go home so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Anyway, hope you like it! I’m in love with your verse and hope you have a happy birthday!

Disclaimer: The fic is based on @parkersanders‘s fic Silence and Duality (read here), and I use one quote from it in here somewhere, I think in the fourth part? Yeah. Enjoy.

Roman was lounging on the couch when it happened.

Everything was fine, until he thought about Parker. The new living situation wasn’t as fear-mongering as he thought it would be, yet there were still tensions. They were all still slightly worried as Parker settled in, but were trying to hold it together so they wouldn’t trigger anything.

Parker was...interesting, to say in the least. With all their history, it was surreal with him back in their lives now. Dealing with his absence for two decades to having him be sleeping next door felt unreal. It would have been unimaginable even a couple weeks ago, and yet that was their reality now.

Then there was the whole drama of Parker escaping his prison, only to put the other through the same hell he experienced—if only for a much shorter time span. Usually Roman was more than okay with drama, but the things that happened in there, only for Virgil to be the one to save him. It left him feeling very defeated in a way he hadn’t ever been before. The shame, the fear...

Suddenly, Roman’s breath started coming in short pants and he could no longer feel the couch beneath him, the pillow under his head, or the clothes he was wearing. He couldn’t feel...anything.

It was like he was having an out-of-body experience, except that didn’t make sense, because as facets of Thomas personality, they were not capable of such things.

He went completely limp on the couch, not having the strength or mental presence to hold his body upright anymore. Focusing on one thing became impossible, his eyes darting back and forth without taking in any information. Roman didn’t know what was happening.

Roman...

Was that even his name? He couldn’t remember. Why did he even have to have a name? It’s not like he even existed...

Roman continued thinking everything and nothing at once, thoughts crossing his mind so quickly, little bits of nonsense that meant nothing.

After a time, Logan walked into the scene—the Prince, sitting on the couch, limp except for the shallow rise and fall of his chest and his eyes flashing a mile a minute.

“Roman?” Logan said, rushing over and kneeling down.

Roman glanced over, barely acknowledging the presence of the other side. “I-I don’t—”

Logan took a breath to steel his nerves. “May I touch you?”

Roman looked confused, then gave a jerk of his head that passed as a nod. Crouching down, Logan took one of the Prince’s hands and placed it on his chest. “Okay, we’re going to go through some grounding exercises to get you feeling calmer. Can you breathe in, as deep as you can?”

A shuddering breath, then a slower exhale.

“Good. Now, repeat.”

They carried on until Roman was breathing fairly regularly, but he was still far from his normal rambunctious self. “Roman, could you do me a favour?” Another nod. “Can you name five things you can see?”

The Prince looked anxiously around the room. “Um, you, the-the TV, the, uh, carpet, table, and-and the blinds over the window.”

“Four things you can feel, now.”

“Your h-hand, my shirt, the couch, and...exhaustion.”

Logan cracked a smile. “Yes, that I can imagine.”

They went through the grounding exercise until Roman was sitting up and didn’t look quite so pale. Logan summoned a glass of water, which Roman chugged gratefully.

“I know I’m not the best at dealing with emotions, but I am curious—do you know what exactly triggered the attack?”

Roman put his head in his hands, mumbling something incoherent.

“I’m sorry; I didn’t catch that.”

Roman raised his head and said, “Parker.”

“What about Parker? I know our situation is going to take some getting used to, but what about that would cause something this bad?”

Hands now shaking again, Roman brushed back his hair. “I was thinking about, how, y’know, we did all this horrible stuff to him, and then he put us through all that when he got out, and it was terrifying. I’m not saying we didn’t deserve it, but, god—”

“Roman, please calm down. You’re rambling, and I know you well enough to recognize when it’s not coming from a place of stability. You’re right; we have done some unacceptable things in the past. We’re all guilty—”

“Virgil’s not.”

“Well, I’m not going to contradict that statement. However, we’re trying to make things right. As for what you faced in there—Parker preyed on our fears. All of us. But fears are often irrational, and even if they’re not, almost any problem can be solved in some way. As long as you remember that, your fears will have no power over you.”

Roman gave a slightly tearful nod, trying to hide the drops through a smile.

Across the room, hidden by shadows, another figure was also trying to hide his tears. Not with a smile, though—with the sleeves of a faded hoodie and the long edges of his sandy hair.

Parker sunk out, retreating back to his room. Just another day where he was to blame.

There was no shortage of those.

A crash broke the relative silence in the mindscape kitchen as Logan dropped the coffee pot, spilling its contents all over the floor.

It was still early—only 9:00, still an hour before regular scheduled time to go to bed—but Thomas had once again decided to procrastinate on a video, so it was likely they both were going to be awake for awhile yet (Roman, too—no video could exist without his input).

Prolonging the inevitable was fruitless, so Logan decided he may as well start early and get some heavily-caffeinated bean water into his system to give him the energy he would require to get through the night.

Making a pot of coffee was pretty much second nature to all the sides by now. With the amount of times Thomas stayed up late, they had all gotten used to rapid-heart rate, shaky-hands, slightly-nauseated feeling. While drinking coffee in the mindscape was more of a habit than actually useful, they all still did it whenever Thomas would be up late. It was really the only way they would function (except Patton, who preferred hot chocolate and was bubbly around the clock).

However, sometimes things go wrong. Logan was distracted, thinking about both the video and Roman. He had been better since his his dissociative episode three days ago, but it had still bothered the analytical side. He was thinking about how Roman’s own mental state might affect the quality of the video (along with the worry for his friend, not that he would admit that) when he dropped the full pot of coffee, shattering it all over the kitchen tile.

As the coffee flooded the floor, they soaked Logan’s fuzzy socks (he was going for comfort rather than appearance. Just this once. One-time thing. Definitely). It began burning his feet, but worse than that was how Logan’s breath stopped.

Being a side meant not having to shower or bathe. It meant not having to go swimming or step in puddles or going in the rain. Being a side meant that dealing with water was a complete rarity, unless one enjoyed baths for leisure (like Virgil sometimes did. Roman had found that out one day, promised to keep it secret, then proceeded to tell Logan, Patton, and Thomas about Anxiety’s guilty pleasure). The last time Logan had been in water was...

The flashback was the only thing occupying his vision. He could vaguely take in his surroundings, but his immediate thoughts were get out you’re going to drown if you do not find a way to GET OUT YOU’RE GOING TO DROWN—

Gasping for breath was a painful affair as Logan forced his lungs to take in oxygen. He wouldn’t be able to escape unless he could think rationally and come up with a solution, but no matter where he stepped, water squelched between his toes and he knew he was still in danger.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a figure wearing loose clothing, a hood draped over its head. His mind immediately went to Death.

As he tried to get away, his back hit something solid. He slid down, landing in the puddle on the ground.

A wall, it’s a wall, you’re trapped and you’re going to drown and now you’re cornered—

“Logan? Logan! Can you hear me, kiddo?”

Yes, I can hear you. Who are you, though?

“Are you okay? Logan?”

Please, stop pestering me with questions. I need to think of how to escape this torturous flood.

“We’re gonna go to the couch now, okay, buddy?”

He was abruptly pulled upright, his one arm draped over someone’s shoulder. Shuffling forward, he eventually dropped onto something soft—and dry.

Dry? Soft? No water, no flooding, no walls, what—?

“Can you hear me, Lo?”

Logan looked over to see a gentle face, with worried eyes peering behind a thick pair of glasses.

“Pat-Patton?”

“Yep, I’m here.”

Logan leaned forward, placing his head in his hands. He was slowly coming back to reality, but everything still felt wrong. He was the logical side! He wasn’t supposed to succumb to irrational fears! A flashback, of all things...

But it felt so real.

“I thought I was back...in the place, the one where Parker put me when he was getting out of his own prison...”

Patton’s brow furrowed, and he placed a hand on Logan’s shoulder. “Do you wanna talk about it? Now, I know you don’t like all this ‘emotional crap’ stuff, but I’m always here for you. As your dad.”

A small smile crept out against Logan’s will. “You’re not my dad. And no, I don’t need to talk about anything. It’s stupid.”

“Kiddo, it’s not stupid. I know you think you have to be 100%, all the time, but all of us know you have emotions. Especially me. I know you, Lo.”

Logan shook his head. “I dropped the coffee pot—oh no, it probably made a mess, I should go—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, it’s fine, we’ll get it later. No use crying over spilled milk—er, coffee, right?”

At that moment, Logan realized how much his feet hurt. “I think it burned me, and I need to go remedy that now.”

“No, let me! Be back in a jiffy!”

Someone else suddenly appeared in Logan’s line of vision.

Patton spoke up. “Oh, Parker’s here, too,” he said as he raced up the stairs

Parker looked distraught, then pulled off the hood on his dark sweater. “I’m-I’m sorry. I’ll leave now.”

Logan nodded mutely, regretting opening up and being so vulnerable, not only in front of Patton, but Parker, too (though inadvertently). He felt slightly remorseful about having Parker hear what he’d said, but he was still trying to pick up the pieces.

Parker sunk out, leaving Logan alone for only a moment before Patton popped up with a first aid kit. While he could’ve easily summoned one on his own, Patton liked to have some realism in the mindscape. Said it “made things interesting”.

He flipped the top open, bandaids spilling all over the couch. “Nice socks,” Patton said, before shimmying them off.

Logan’s feet were bright pink. Patton looked them over, but it was all superficial. He slathered on some aloe vera, and put Logan’s socks back on.

“That was one of the most unpleasant things I have ever experienced.”

“Are you talking about my first aid skills, Lo?”

“Of course. But putting my socks back on after? That was low.”

“-gan.”

“Stop.”

---

Parker reappeared back in his own room, which was still almost blank, and he threw himself on his bed. Was he being selfish, making Logic’s breakdown all about him? Of course he was. Logic was the one struggling right now, all because of him.

Guilt washed over him. Even Logic was crumbling because Parker had decided revenge was better than compromise or forgiveness. At the time, he had wanted to break them, but now...

Parker knew what he did was wrong. He wished for some way to undo all the damage.

But what’s done is done. He just has to keep trying.

A couple days later, Patton was laying in bed, looking up at the fairy lights on his ceiling. The little patterns resembled stars, which usually relaxed him. He had designed his room entirely for comfort. Patton was a homebody, and his room reflected that.

However, tonight was different. His mind was replaying Logan’s little breakdown on the kitchen floor. He’d said it was a flashback.

“Triggered by dropping the coffee and getting liquid all over my feet. Roman also might’ve helped with the intensity—he had some trouble a few days ago. My best guess is dissociation. I suppose that was on my mind, distracting my focus.”

That prospect was terrifying. The most logical, grounded side falling victim to the mind’s whims? What chance did the rest of them have?

The lights dimmed as he closed his eyes, falling into an uneasy slumber.

---

Several hours later, Parker awoke to screaming coming from down the hall.

Even with Anxiety, Thomas was a pretty chill guy. Screaming in pure terror was not a very common thing heard around the mindscape, especially not this late at night.

Heart racing, Parker leapt out of bed and threw open his door.

Morality. It was coming from Morality’s room.

Parker burst in, catching sight of Morality thrashing about wildly on the bed, tears streaming down his face from his scrunched-up eyes.

“Morality, wake up!”

Parker rushed over and began desperately shaking Morality’s shoulder. “It’s just-it’s just a dream!” Tears began to flow from his own eyes.

The Heart’s eyes flew open, and he gasped in horror, shoving Parker away with a choked gasp.

Virgil appeared behind them, pushing past Parker in an urgent, but not unkind way, and gathered Patton in his arms. Usually, he was vehemently against physical contact, but he couldn’t leave Patton like that. The moral side needed comfort, and judging from how clingy—er, loving, he always was, it was safe to assume physical contact was what he needed at the moment.

Patton clung onto Virgil, bunching up the darker trait’s shirt in his hands and sobbing into his shoulder. Virgil tentatively wrapped his arms around Patton while Parker stood off to the side, looking distraught.

“Um, I got this...I think. Can you, uh, make sure Logan and Roman are still asleep? I don’t want to overwhelm Pat right now.”

Parker left gracelessly, stumbling into the doorframe on his way out.

“Hey, Parker?”

The side reappeared at the door.

“Thank you, for trying to help him.”

Parker gave a meek nod, then disappeared from view.

Virgil turned his attention back to Patton. His tears were still coming, but his breaths were at least slowing down. “I’m s-so sorry you have to see me like this, kiddo...”

“No, it’s fine. I mean, you’ve seen me during some pretty rough times, and you’ve always helped me through it. Least I can do is return the favour, y’know?”

Patton sat back up, and Virgil summoned a glass of water. He handed to Patton, who drained half the glass in one go. “Thanks, Verge.”

Virgil gulped a little, then nodded. “So, what happened? Was it, like...a nightmare?”

“Yeah,” Patton said softly after a beat of silence.

Nightmares were nothing new to Virgil. Heck, Patton knew that. Ever since he became more comfortable with the other sides, he had still really only opened up to Patton about the nightmares. He was sure Logan and Roman knew about them, but they never brought it up. But Pat said his door was always open for Virgil, any time. So Virgil had taken to going to Patton for comfort after night terrors.

Virgil leaned back, waiting to see if Pat would open up or not. Oftentimes, all Virgil wanted was some comforting after a nightmare without having to relive it. He wondered if Patton was the same.

Eventually, Pat sighed and looked up. “It was about Parker.”

Virgil’s interest was immediately piqued. “Parker?”

“Well, not Parker exactly,” Patton rushed to clarify. “Just...going through that prison again, and the others’, too. Like a mix of the nightmares Parker made for all of us. Logan and Roman told me about what they went though, so it was like a...mega-terror-extravaganza thing. I can’t really figure out why theirs were in there, I don’t exactly have the same fears as them or anything.”

“It’s because you’re an empath, Dad.”

Patton smiled at him. “Thanks, son.”

“I’m notcha son,” Virgil said, hiding a smirk behind his hand.

“Ok, whatever you say.”

The tension was broken, and even though Patton still had drying tear tracks on his face, the twinkle that was usually in his eye had returned.

But not everyone could recover so easily from emotional turmoil.

Stupid. You should’ve done better. Helping people is easy when you’re a good person, which is why you’re still struggling with it. You only ever bring bad things to the table. What’s even the point in trying to help if everyone’s just trying to push you away?

Parker curled up as his mind realized how hopeless he was. No matter how hard he tried, he would never measure up to the other sides. That’s why they locked him away in the first place, wasn’t it? He contributed nothing. Even Anxiety had a purpose, to keep Thomas safe from harm. Thomas definitely didn’t need another side helping with that.

What exactly was Parker’s purpose now? How could he make it up to the other sides and prove he belonged?

Virgil was having a bad day.

This in itself wasn’t unusual. With him being the embodiment of anxiety, he was always feeling as if his emotions were heightened in a negative way—which is why he was almost always on edge. Then there was the messed up sleep schedule, unhealthy eating habits (whether it was a “physical” feeling or just a placebo effect, the sides all felt happiest when they stuck with somewhat healthy eating, along with cookies where Patton’s involved), and a reliance on caffeine.

He was not exactly a role model regarding self care.

Since a few months ago, after they did “Accepting Anxiety,” he did feel like he belonged with the group more. They made an effort to make him feel welcome, and it did help.

However, that didn’t mean Virgil never had issues anymore.

Today was one of the days his “issues” were making themselves known. He hadn’t slept in over 36 hours, and in that time, had been drinking coffee almost non-stop. Even his body, ever used to being heavily caffeinated, was struggling. His pulse was racing and his hands wouldn’t stop shaking.

The worst was that Virgil’s mind refused to stay focused, and turned to negative or intrusive thoughts rather than the task at hand. He had been flitting around all day as a result of the caffeine, but he still felt completely drained.

He remembered how Patton would cook or bake while stressed, as a way to take his mind off things.

And that’s how Virgil ended up standing at the counter, trying to slice up a red bell pepper with a giant santoku knife for his homemade ratatouille (alright, yes, he was thinking of the movie the entire time).

But shaky hands and large knives don’t mix. One wrong move, one second of attention being elsewhere, is all it took for Virgil to miss the pepper and instead slice straight into his thumb.

Blood began to flow out of the wound, dripping onto the counter. Virgil stared at it, fixated on the deep red colour.

He looked like Thomas, in a demonic sort of way. His hair was dark, yet paler than when they were young. His skin was tinted blue and the shadows danced around him like a hazy mirage. His nails were long and black like they belonged on a monster’s hand, not his. His eyes were the scariest: black where the whites were supposed to be, the pupils a deep red instead of black.

The same crimson colour that currently flooded out of Virgil’s hand.

Panic overtook him, spiralling him into the all-too-familiar anxiety attack. This one was worse than any he had ever experienced. Along with the rapid heart rate, the growing pressure on his chest, and his throat closing up, he began to feel lightheaded at the sight of the blood.

The red that looked so much like Parker’s eyes when they first met again after fifteen years...

Tears pricked at his eyes, and every time he tried to catch his breath, it was knocked out of him again as if he had been punched. He collapsed to the floor, wheezing, desperately trying to breathe. When he couldn’t, that just made him more distressed.

It was a never-ending cycle when he got like this. Alone, Virgil was powerless to stop it. His breathing would become more useless until he passed out and his body reset itself. Which wouldn’t be so bad, except when his attacks were that severe, it usually incapacitated him for days while he tried to recover.

Passing out never did seem like a good option in these times of distress. His primordial reaction was to get out of the situation, which would make sense except he couldn’t move, he couldn’t escape the situation, he was helpless on the ground. Thoughts of death always crossed his mind because he couldn’t breathe...

A slight whimper came out against his will, using up what little oxygen he had left. He was truly, undeniably going to die like this.

“Anxiety, please, breathe!”

A voice. A voice belonging to a person. Someone familiar, maybe.

Virgil turned over and was greeted with the face of Parker.

Despite Parker’s appearance being drastically different than when they first saw him a few weeks ago, it was still him. And at that moment, him was a threat.

Rather than hyperventilating, Virgil’s breathing screeched to a dead halt. A tiny part was saying Parker’s fine, Parker’s safe, Parker’s changed for the better, the larger, instinctive part was screaming danger. Absolute danger.

“No, no, no, no, no, please breathe, don’t stop, don’t—”

“What’s happening?” a new voice boomed.

“He—he—”

“What did you do to him?! Never mind, just get out and let me deal with this!”

A face appeared in Virgil’s line of vision, close to the ground. “Verge, bud, I’m gonna wrap this towel around your hand and I need you to take some deep breaths. What’s that little pattern you do? 4-6-8?”

Virgil jerked his hand away as...Roman? Roman bundled up Virgil’s hand, holding the towel in place.

“Sorry, but I need to stop the bleeding, and...Ah! 4-7-8! We’re gonna do that, okay, Finding Emo? Copy me; in for four...”

Roman counted as he took an exaggerated breath, and Virgil followed, choking a bit at four.

“Good, Verge, now hold,” Roman said, silently counting.

“And out.”

They repeated it several more times, and Virgil slowly sat up. He clutched his hand with the towel still on it close to his chest, blood soaking through the fabric.

With a flourish of Roman’s hand, a first aid box appeared next to the pair. Roman popped it open, pulling out some antiseptic, gauze, a butterfly bandage, and the medical tape.

He held out his hand, and Virgil hesitantly placed his own in it.

Roman got to work, applying some antiseptic and the butterfly bandage to hold the edges together. He wrapped it in gauze and finished by taping the edges down.

As he was putting everything back in the kit, Virgil spoke up for the first time.

“You shouldn’t have yelled at him.”

“Who?”

“It’s ‘whom’, and—”

“Ok, I’m going to have to ask you to stop hanging around Logan so much.”

“Anyway. Parker. You shouldn’t have yelled at him. He didn’t do anything wrong; he just wanted to help.”

The Prince huffed out a sigh. “Yeah, I know. I’ll go apologize to him in a bit.”

Looking displeased, but too tired to argue, Virgil nodded his assent.

After being shoved out of the kitchen, Parker had sprinted up the stairs back to his room. His knees buckled and he pitched forward onto his bed, his weak resolve crumbling. Great, heaving sobs made their way out, his chest clenching painfully.

Everyone hated him. He made everything worse, and everyone was suffering because of his actions.

The grief was too overwhelming, and Parker didn’t know what to do. His body shut down, and he fell into a deep sleep.

---

As soon as he was unconscious, Parker’s mind flashed back to all the damage he’d inflicted.

Not only on the other sides, but his host, too. He had almost gotten Thomas killed because he couldn’t control his fear. Then, after escaping his prison, forced him to go though those horrible hallucinations when Thomas had done nothing wrong.

Pitting Creativity against an unbeatable enemy, making him think Virgil was in danger, coating the prison in blood.

Giving Logic a problem with an impossible solution, drowning him in cold water with no escape.

Putting Morality through emotional turmoil, which would be so much worse for the Heart, then falling for eternity.

And Virgil...

Virgil had stood up for him. He had refused to put up a wall, and the other sides had just thrown him in with Parker. Torturing him for five long years, going through unimaginable horrors. Virgil escaping, then having to go through that same hell again to rescue the other sides.

They all hated him now. His purpose, originally to protect Thomas and give him courage, was abolished. He had changed, going from Fear to Sadness.

In reality, he was a traumatized kid that didn’t know what he did wrong, so he was punished for it. His revenge for that had been petty and cruel.

No wonder they never wanted him around.

Parker awoke with a jolt, an unbearable pressure on his chest. He wasn’t breathing, he couldn’t breathe, he didn’t deserve to breathe.

In his mind, he was straddling the border between sleep and consciousness. Enough that he could see is surroundings, but not make sense of what was happening.

He couldn’t feel his arms, or his legs, and even the vice on his chest began to seem less important than before. It was like he was floating away from his body, back into the prison, reliving all the pain he had inflicted on himself and others. The hellish hallucinations swirled around him in his mind, feeding his panic.

It was as if he was still in a dream—no, a nightmare. He wanted to disappear, and he already felt like he was fading away, being stretched too far by regret.

A voice permeated his thoughts, but they sounded muffled for some reason.

“Parker, can I come in?”

He gave no answer. He could give no answer.

“I know you’re in there, I just wanted to, ah, apologize for my un-princely behaviour. If you need your space, I’ll go, but—”

Parker let out a gasp as he choked on air, he didn’t know what to do, he couldn’t think, and suddenly his door was being pushed open by the frantic hands of Creativity.

It was like Parker was watching things happen from an outside perspective. He could hear Creativity calling his name and shaking him, but he couldn’t respond.

“Parker, c’mon, stay with me here—Pat!”

Someone thumped down the hall, and Morality appeared at the door. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t know, I walked in and he was like this!”

Tears poured out of Parker’s eyes and he was trembling even harder. His mouth open and closed like a fish, but nothing came out.

“Oh, crap, Parker, honey, can you hear me?” Patton grabbed one of Parker’s hands. “Can you squeeze my hand?”

Parker continued to heave, making no move to squeeze Patton’s hand.

“Shoot. Can you get Logan, please?”

Roman raced off, then returned with a slightly dishevelled Logan in tow. “What’s going on?”

Logan caught sight of Parker on the bed. “Oh dear. No, that’s not good.”

“What do we do?”

Suddenly, Virgil popped up at the door. “Geez, Princey, you were just supposed to say sorry to him, what could you have possibly done—”

He was cut off when he saw the situation. Parker was spasming in bed because of how hard his muscles were shaking, his face turning blue (due from lack of oxygen, not as an illusion), and he was barely breathing. The other sides were huddled around him, with Patton holding one of his hands.

“Guys, what the heck?” Anxiety said as he rushed over. “Parker, listen if you can; we’re gonna sit you up because, believe me, laying on your back makes it harder to breathe when you’re like this.”

Parker couldn’t respond, he still felt as if he was dying, and no one was trying to do anything to help. They were going to let him die.

Two pairs of hands gently hoisted him up so he was against the headboard of the bed. The pressure eased somewhat, but his body began falling forward.

“Verge—”

“I’ve got him,” said Patton.

The emotional side wormed his way in next to Parker and slipped an arm around his shoulders, holding him up. Morality’s thumb moved back and forth in mini circles, attempting to soothe Parker’s distress. Creativity grabbed one of Parker’s hands and squeezed it, trying to ground him. Logic did the same on the other side.

Slowly, Parker came back to himself, fresh tears spilling from his reddened eyes. He sobbed, utterly exhausted and full of loathing. He took his hands away and buried his head in them, his shoulders shaking with every cry. He mumbled something through the noise, then curled in even further.

“What was that?” Anxiety asked softly.

“I-I’m so sorry. F-for everything. I was h-horrible to you, to everyone, to Thomas,” he gasped out. “I’m sorry.”

Morality wrapped both arms around him. “We forgive you, kiddo. Always.” Logic and Creativity both nodded in agreement.

Anxiety grabbed both of Parker’s hands, gently pulling them away from his face. “Look at me.”

Parker glanced up, fear in his eyes.

Anxiety placed his hands on either side of Parker’s face, and brought their heads together. They rested for a minute as Parker continued to cry silently.

“We forgive you, alright? All of us. We’ve all made mistakes, we’ve all done crap we shouldn’t have. Hell, it was a mistake on these guys’ part to lock you away, and mine for not helping you get out when I did. It’s in the past, okay? And we’ll work things out. Got it?”

“Got it,” Parker sniffled.

“And we’ll always need you. You’re not unnecessary, you’re not evil, you’re not a burden. You’re you, and that’s all we could ever ask for.”

Parker began crying harder, and Anxiety placed a kiss on his forehead. The other four wrapped themselves around them, forming a cocoon of safety.

Creativity, Morality, Logic, Anxiety, and Sadness.

Roman, Patton, Logan, Virgil, and Parker.

Wanted. Good. Loved. Safe.

Enough.

#sanders sides #fanfic #quasimodo speaks #fandom #silence and duality

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yfczangel777 · 4 years

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just to vent into the void here;

on the previous post about ppl being offput by a fave if mine...I love this character soso much and like also we are a shit ton alike... like I hardcore self project onto him and GET him cuz our personality and frequently our way of speaking and our handling mental illness is spot on the same. Hasnt always been the nicest or healthiest for either of us but being able to fix and reconcile and learn to handle it better through loving action w him made me happy for him and also had a certain level of self comfort because we basically the same bitch lol. And people were saying how they didnt like when he got into his dark place for a bit and it was 'uncomfy' or threw them off the character as a whole or made him 'problematic' or smth and I'm just here like "um ouch :*) " cuz thats me bitch lol and also like that image of the lady holding the grown man and telling ppl off for that character

And like not to make excuses for either of us but like I dont think he was problematic? Maybe cuz I understand on a personal level? Like he did some things that weren't very kind when he was hurting but they weren't that bad and he did it out of what he felt was necessity and apologized later??

And fr like that wasnt even so bad. He self isolated and told the player "Idc if it hurts your feelings, I cant be close with you" and to stop having feelings for him cuz he wasnt worth it. Like?????

And like once during a literal time crunch life or death situation while also in the heat of his darkest place and having had a lot of fuked up shit revealed to him he purposefully broke a little robot that wouldn't be quiet and that was his own property at the time... not the players... because he hadnt given it to the player yet (later he fixes it and gives it as a gift)

He kept tabs on where you were and got worried if he didnt see you because a man had literally just crashed through your window and tried to abduct you and would have succeeded if he hadnt gotten there just in time. And it was clear that none of this was over and theres a target on your back still. He wasn't being controlling or unreasonable he was trying to keep you safe from very real danger.

Yes he told you off for a bit once meeting face to face. Yes he told you your feelings toward him were wrong and he was going to keep blocking you out so stop trying and just move on with your life and forget him. And if you didnt your feelings would be hurt and that's your own fault cuz he told you to back off.

That wasnt nice if him but it was preserving his own vulnerable heart and also your safety. This character is not your average dude. His lifestyle is literally ACTUALLY deadly dangerous. Hes taught time and again he isnt allowed to have friends ir family let alone a lover. He eludes to the fact that they HAVE forced him to uproot everything and drop everyone and change his whole identity more than once. And due to his field of work people who are close to him can be used against him and are in literal life threatening danger by association. The chatroom was supposed to be arms distance enough but he got attached to everyone there anyways. And then you came and he fell for you hard. It wasnt ever supposed to happen that way so he went all weird and denied it out of panic and nessecity... once you were in danger he cared for you so he had to go help you and you met face to face which was WAY more than he ever intended to happen and also exposed him way more to catching deeper and deeper feelings. But here he was desperately trying to do damage control because he knows that people dear to him get hurt or killed. And he loves you.. so as much as it hurts he has to try to keep you away to keep you SAFE

All of this is literal... like not just that he thinks hes a bad person and will hurt you.... like literally you are in real physical danger from being associated with him. And this is evidenced and proved throughout the story. And he blames himself for ever even letting you interact with them but like... the poor boy is human jesus christ he needs connection he needs love. It's a mistake he beats himself up over. And so he tries to damage control and get you to move on and forget about him. It kills him the whole time and its evidenced the whole time that he hates having to do this.

And the whole time the worst he tells you is he doesn't care if you get a hurt heart because you wont leave him alone when he tells you to. (Spoiler alert.. that's a lie! He cares a lot but you need to be safe from involvement in his dangerous life)

And the whole time I noticed its actually even an EXCESSIVE thing he does(it's a nice thing tho) that he does nothing but call you a good and wonderful person who deserves happiness and that needs to be safe and keep living because you are so good and so bright and so kind

But him and his life will never allow your safety, so you cant be with him for your protection.

He never stops with how nice you are... how good you are... how much you need to be in this world and be safe because you add light to the world.

Even when hes being cold.. even when hes telling you off

It's always centered around this.

As well as that hes "a dangerous guy" and 'cant keep anything or anyone close'

Putting himself down and lamenting who and what he is.

The breakthrough comes when you finally see the extent of him and the struggles and danger he faces and still wear him down and tell him unwaveringly that: ok you see and understand the danger fully now and you dont care and you want to stick by him even if its dangerous because you love him. And that he doesnt have to go through life alone anymore cuz you'll be there for him no matter what.

And you have to wrestle away from him the notion of 'no I cant let her do this because I love her and want her to be able to live and be safe. It hurts being alone and id love to be able to be with her but I cant cuz if anything happened to her I'd never forgive myself and also she's so great she deserves a normal life where she doesn't have to worry.'

And you have to lovingly assert to him that he can think of himself too... that he doent have to go through life alone because you know the risks and you decided you want to be with him anyways because you love him. That you understand he wants you safe but that was your decision to make and you choose him no matter the dangers... that you will help him and go through it together as a team.

And he struggles because all his life he had to be the action taker, decision maker, and the protector (especially with his brother in childhood) but slowly comes around to the fact that you will be partners... shouldering the burden together while enriching each others lives. That he doesnt have to be the solitary protector of things and people he has come to love despite not having been supposed to in the first place... cuz hes HUMAN. That someone else has seen his situation and his soul laid bare and still said I love you and I'm going to stand with you through this. And learn to let go and let them in and let them share his burden despite being so afraid of doing so and afraid of what could happen to them as a result. Accepting that they made their decision and its theirs to make. And dealing with the fear as well as the relief and strange joy of FINALLY having someone in his life to love and be loved by and to go through things //together//

Like I just dont get how ppl can like tsunderes and even yanderes but then this character is like "pls no ppl get hurt with me and I care for you so you gotta stay away from me for your own good" and they're like... butthurt that he wasn't all peppy and sweet like usual because his life and everything he held dear was legit crumbling around him??? That someone with his past and his current job/living situation took a bit before he could open up and spill his guts to them??? At a job where.. to quote the game itself 'even an offhanded joke can get you killed' ??? Like yall are entitled to your opinions... and thank god this character is fictional or else that would be hella f-ed up of yall but... oof.

#me #rant #vent #if ppl know the character its clear who im speaking of lol #or if ppl have seen my reblogs lately lolol #i have a lot of feelings ok? lol

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sweetcatastrophex · 5 years

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ive been feeling super weird lately and it’s probably partially bc i’m on my period but do you ever just feel like you’re being pulled in so many directions it might rip you apart? well i’m not gonna rip apart but i feel like so many ppl have been demanding things from me, my attention, my time, my energy, and it’s so draining. i feel like i need some quality alone time. but i’m a people pleaser i guess? i have such a hard time saying no to plans or cancelling on someone so i never do it even tho i should take time for myself. i always put ppl ahead of myself in that way. and then i keep thinking about how lance called me selfish and i can’t get it out of my head. he’s still mad at me about this fight we had two weeks ago and i think i’ll call him later. but i’m feeling so anxious and i can’t focus on work. which is making me more anxious. i stayed up til around 2 or 3 last night bc anthony came over bc he was upset about this situation he’s in with the girl he’s been seeing/the love of his life lol. he told me days ago that he needed a friend to talk to and i would usually drop everything to help a friend, but i wasn’t able to, so i had postponed it for a couple days and didn’t wanna cancel or flake again. and didn’t wanna neglect him as a friend. i wanted to help him out/be a shoulder for him to cry on or just be an ear for him to spill everything out to. i knew that having him come over would mean i wouldn’t have time to activate my new phone, work on my stories for work, or call lance (which i really need to do...), but i had him come over anyway bc he needed it. and this is something i normally wouldn’t think twice about, bc i tend to put peoples’ needs before my own pretty often, but i’m thinking about it now bc lance told me i’m selfish. and i feel guilty for not calling him yet. but i will. i also keep thinking about the term “empath.” like a lot. i know i’m an empath. not like meaning i have supernatural powers bc obvs that’s ridiculous but i can definitely feel peoples’ emotions vividly. idk how to explain it. ever since i was little ive felt like ive understood how people felt about me. i could sense when a boy had a crush on me and i was always right about it. i would joke to myself that i had a sixth sense, but i never told anyone this out of fear of sounding crazy or narcissistic. but then years later, karen said something similar. something like she knows when a guy likes her or something and i was like yooo we both have a sixth sense. it doesn’t just apply to romantic feelings. and when someone i care about is hurting, it hurts me to the point where it’s (sometimes) physical. today jake told me he loves me bc i’m very compassionate and caring. i think i have a large capacity for empathy and it’s taken me a long time to be able to identify and articulate that. i think it’s part of why so many people are drawn to me. i read somewhere that people who need healing will gravitate towards empaths. that reminds me of my relationship with my emotionally abusive ex. it makes sense. but i also think some guys are attracted to me bc i’m sure of who i am. i’m also a pretty positive person, and i tend to smile a lot (notes ive picked up from people around me lol). i think people who are genuinely happy are naturally attractive. people are drawn to happiness and can tell when someone is feigning it. i was thinking about this today: i have spent years cultivating my confidence. i would say “cultivating confidence” but i want to say cultivating my confidence bc i feel like its my own, it’s very personal. it’s different for everyone. i’ve spent so much time and energy working on myself, looking inside and analyzing myself, analyzing my insecurities and figuring out how to become more confident, bc i knew that everything i wanted would fall into place after that. i knew i would land any job i wanted, i would get any guy i wanted, etc. lance has told me so many times that i have a good head on my shoulders and that he admires how i’m able to do anything i set my mind to. and idc how corny it sounds, it’s true. i created this formula for myself and it’s worked. i can honestly say i’m happy with where i am in my life. i’m happy with who i am. i think big mouth is the tv show i was watching that touched on this. they said something about people who “know who they are.” i think people who are introspective and have figured themselves out have a certain glow. and they attract people who are still searching. i think at a young age i realized that fear was stopping me from reaching my potential, and i simply wasn’t having that. i recognized my privilege and wanted to use my resources for good. i knew i had a talent for writing, rampant curiosity, a desire to help others, and a hunger for learning, so i became a journalist. but my point is, i reflected on my high school years a lot and i realized how much of it i spent being nervous. i remember feeling so nervous about such trivial things. and i didn’t want to be held back anymore. so i decided i wouldn’t be. “So please ask yourself: What would I do if I weren’t afraid? And then go do it.” — Sheryl Sandberg i read that probably around 2013 when i was hearing a lot about sheryl sandberg and her book “lean in.” which makes sense bc my revelation stage/major growth period was around 2012 / 2013. another thing i’m thinking about: my poor time management skills. they’re bad, yes. i recognize that and i know i need to work on it. but a factor in that is also me tending to my friends’ needs. again, i need to learn to say no to people and put myself first. but then i feel guilty. i need to work on this.

#reflection #thoughts

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tbsltae · 7 years

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Arguments

Request: Hey! Could you do an imagine where the reader gets into an argument with stiles and spills that she’s been feeling really lonely and unappreciated and unloved recently and it ends with a tonne of fluff. Thank you! Xxxx

A/N: I’m new to this blog, my name’s Gillian, call me whatever idc. But this is my first imagine so plz don’t judge too harshly. Tell me what you think! xx Set in s5.

Warnings: I don’t think there are but maybe I’m wrong...?

*Also v short but whatever

Requested by anon

Y/N knew he was pissed off. Stiles was actually beyond pissed off at this point. He seemed to be that way a lot more since she’d found out about the supernatural. Something about her always putting herself in danger or not listening to his warnings, which she never did. She never would.

He’d managed to keep it together around the pack, a sickeningly sweet smile plastered on his face the entire time. Being that Scott lived right down the street from her, he tagged along with them. He could sense the tension between the two but decided not to question it, simply thanking Stiles for the ride and telling Y/N goodbye.

Y/N waited for his inevitable explosion, but it didn’t come. Not in the car, anyway.

Stiles slammed the door shut behind him, turning on Y/N, who was bracing herself for his inevitable explosion. “What were you thinking, Y/N?”

She kept her gaze locked on the floor, “I dunno. I was helping save Lydia.”

“Yeah, from the Dread Doctors!“

“You were there too, Stiles! You could’ve been hurt just as much as me!” She yelled back, tears stinging the backs of her eyes. “That’s different.” She raised an eyebrow, challenging him, “Oh, yeah? How so?”

“Look, I’ve been dealing with this a lot longer than you-” She cut him off, “So what? At the end of the day, you’ll always be safe because you’re a main priority.” His eyebrows furrowed, “What do you mean? You’re a main priority too,” She didn’t look at him, avoiding his judging gaze. “Is that what you think? That you’re not a main priority?“

She didn’t answer. “Y/N, you’ll always be a main priority. To me, especially,” He pulled her into a hug that she quickly rejected. He brushed it off. “Why would you think that you aren’t a main priority?”

She brought up another question instead, “Stiles, have you ever wondered where my parents are? Why they’re never here?”

Stiles paused to think about this. He rarely ever saw Mr or Mrs. Y/L/N. In fact, he’d only seen them a few times throughout the entirety of their friendship. “Where are they?”

She shrugged. “Somewhere in Hawaii, I think. Maybe Maui, maybe the Bahamas, it’s not like they’d ever give me an exact location on the off chance I would follow them.”

“They just… left you?”

“Yeah, for almost 4 months now,” She waved her hand in dismissal like it was nothing. “But it’s not like anyone cares enough to even notice.”

“It’s not that we don’t care, it’s just, we’ve been really busy lately, you know? Lydia’s in Eichen House, Kira can’t control her powers, Scott died, I…” He hesitated, letting out a slow breath. “I killed Donovan, and Theo has his own pack that is trying to kill us.”

"I know that, Stiles. We all have to deal with our own problems, but that's the thing; we don't. No one shoulders their problems alone. I don't think I can pretend to be just okay with everything and help everyone else without asking for anything in return," Her voice cracked as she choked down a sob. "I can't do this anymore."

With that, she broke down.

Y/N crumpled to the floor, cries escaping her lips, tears streaming down her face. Stiles crouched down, engulfing the girl in a hug. She cried into his shirt, sobs racking through her body. Her breathing slowly returned to normal as she ran out of tears, a weight being lifted off her shoulders from telling him. And finally, she didn't feel so alone.

#stiles stilinski imagine #teen wolf imagine #teen wolf

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swearronchanel · 7 years

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Who let me watch 5.06?

I should be doing an assignment that’s due tomorrow but ya know due tomorrow means do tomorrow. Lol I know I should be ashamed to be a procrastinator but university has ruined me anyway. I’m tired from literally going to one lecture haha, but in any event I’ve been rewatching mad men for the who knows what time but I thought I’d take a break from all that and watch an episode of CtM & @flyingnonny inspired me to do a reaction post so why not? I decided on 5.06 since last Sunday’s episode reminded us of that camping trip 😂😂 here goes nothing..

*skips intro bc I’m impatient*

Cute community moment ☺️

TRIXIE😍 slaying my life

Shelagh looks so good too 😍 and Angela melting my heart!

Why is shelagh forever wearing cardigans? I like cardigans every now and then but all the time, really?

Everyone is sitting outside, Trixie is in a sleeveless dress, as is Barbara, so it has to be warm?? take it off Shelagh

She’s still my bby though even if I don’t always agree with her fashion choices

what gross vejo pinching Trixie’s ass? That’s not ok

And Babs too lmao, creepy old man, die

Shelagh saying “hello dear” aw

But this is like the only interaction between Shelagh and Trixie & that does not suffice !!

ALL I WANT IS FOR THEM TO HAVE AN ACTUAL FRIENDSHIP IDC HOW MANY TIMES IVE SAID IT I REALLY Want it😭😭💕💕 my two fav bbys

I HAVE EVEN GIVEN REASONS WHY & I CAN GIVE THEM AGAIN *** 1) Why not?? Shelagh has like no real friends besides her husband and sort of Sister Julienne?

2) just please, because I’m asking nicely 3) When Shelagh was Sister Bernadette she was often friendly/ in the gossip and conversation with the nurses & remember that one time Trixie grabbed her to come listen to Jenny’s phone conversation?

4) Trixie was the only one besides Sister Julienne to visit her in the sanatorium. That has to count for something! 5) They’ve both been on the show since day 1 & have known each other the longest (besides the nuns) why wouldn’t they be friends or least actually speak to each other?

Aye this is the lady who’s fake pregnant

Shelagh wearing earrings though >> here for it

Sorry there will be a lot of gushing over Shelagh and Trixie

And also I WANT TRIXIE’S HOOP EARRINGS SO BAD, where can I find them??

And how do I get her clothes and figure and her everything lol?

PHYLLIS ! My champion

“Would it have killed you to sit down for five minutes and eat the whole thing!” I LOVE HER, SHE IS A GEM, A HERO, A BADASS & IM NOT READY FOR SUNDAY. IM GOING TO BAWL WITH AND FOR HER

she deserves the best

I think this is the only time I’ve ever heard Trixie address Shelagh by her first name?? a prob.

They need to interact more 😭💔💕😍 I will stop saying it when I’m dead even then I’ll prob say it

Actually when I think of it no one ever calls Shelagh by her first name besides obviously Patrick? And Sister Julienne

#MoreShelaghAndTheOtherNursesInteracting2k17aka1962

And I need at least two seconds of them dotting on pregnant Shelagh

Helen looks so good like goals

“I threatened to put one man over my knee but that only encouraged him” HA IM DEAD NO KINK SHAME

I think there’s been a similar joke before but fuck it it’s still funny to me

But seriously everyone loves Trixie lol how could you not though?

Hey Pats, it’s been a while

Lol omg Tim in that uniform.. Not the best costume 😂😂

Never seen Whistle Down the Wind

But you see, Tom and Babs making out as usual, I’m not knocking it lol but this is why Sister J told her to chill when they went to South Africa😂

also lowkey jealous bc Jack Ashton is handsome af and that could’ve been me but it’s all good. He and Helen are adorable together and I’m here for it x10000

Omg I forgot this lady got assaulted

Oh shit I just remembered this is the episode where sister MC is attacked FUCK WHY DID I WATCH THIS

she can’t report it bc she’d get arrested for soliciting wtf

But remember Shelagh wore the headbands in like series 3 (so glad she stopped I was not here for it)? They must’ve gave them to Babs lol

I forgot Trixie didn’t tell the nurses about AA yet

But she looks gorgeous as ever, even with her mascara running

Lowkey nauseas looking at all that fish ugh. Funny becuase they put a grocery store that has a fish market on the block up from where I live in NYC and I hate it

I forgot about Peter lol and he was in an episode this series whoops

LIKE WHERE’S YOUR WIFE LOL, *I know, too busy for this, I don’t think she’d fit in the series anymore anyway*

Sister Mary Cynthia 😰❣️

Lol she doesn’t sing loud enough ??

Sister Julienne is so cute when she smiles but don’t forget she’s a badass

REMEMBER THE AGGRESSIVE JACKET FLAP BC OF THE IRRITATING SISTER URSULA

How did this girl hide her pregnancy though?

And did her brothers just not realize she was pregnant and the mother wasn’t?

Oh jeez my cousin was a colic-y baby and my parents kept him like 3 days a week when I was in high school & it was a nightmare. I didn’t sleep for so long

Dont get me wrong I love babies. But when they scream when I’m trying to sleep, nope. Return to sender.

Shelagh is so excited about camping it’s the purest and most adorable thing 😭😭And I like her shirt

Shelagh made Tim copy the napkin folding from a magazine, SHE IS A GEM

“We never have serviettes on a weeknight” wtf did they just not use napkins every day? I’m confused Lmaoo. What am I missing here 😂omg that reminds me of one of the times my family and I went on a cruise (2006, hella long time ago already wow?? 11 yrs yikes) and my brother & cousin were late to dinner and lied to my mom & aunt saying they were at a “napkin folding class” & my family deadass believed it up until 2 years ago😂

Shelagh’s accent is so cute. I’ve said that many times but it’s so sweet. But again why do we just have to accept she’s Scottish with no context as to how/why she came to England? Like I’m sure there were convents in Scotland. I dont even care that much I just will forever be curious as to why it seems she had no life before she got married lol? Like they don’t ever bring up the fact she was a nun, but ok maybe she feels awkward talking about it but what about before?

They’re so excited it’s so precious, protect this family 😂😭💕💕

Sister MJ is fasting lol I should try it😂

Omg another dumb story, I didn’t realize today is Ash Wednesday and was hella confused seeing some people with ash on their forehead 😂😂 I should give up something for lent but idk what, we shall see. My mom gave up carbs last year & I died bc I lived at home and ate what she cooked and almost all my fav foods are carbs😂

Shelagh referred to Patsy as Patsy, I’ve only ever heard her say Nurse Mount??

lol Tim you’re what 14? you know damn well those arent* bullet holes

at least he has some of his innocence still. I didn’t @ 14

Sometimes I forget I’m gonna be 19 this year wtf. I’ve accidentally told people I’m 16 before and had to correct myself 😂😂

Patrick is excited about this holiday, boy you don’t know what’s coming 😂

HE’S GONNA ATTACK THE LADY WITH A BABY I FORGOT THAT TOO WTF

I wanna fight him

Diane’s anemic ? Or her mum is just assuming

SHELAGH IN HER CAMPING OUTFIT!! The hair scarf and trousers !! I’m so here for it 😍😭

I want to see her in another pair!! yes lets get it 1962. Probably not likely this series but hopefully next series!! Ah can’t wait

Shit this series is almost over 💔💔 but omg 1963 gonna be lit as well?!

Like the space race started/orbiting the earth, Kennedy’s assassination .. wait never mind lol I’m thinking of American History moments. but still a lot of it was crazy world news so maybe it’s mentioned?? first bond film came out in'63, petition for Tim to go take Susan whatever from around the corner to see it since we know he liked the novels

Lots of famous films came out in ‘63 so there’s gotta be some reference.

Fun fact: I love pop culture references in period drama bc I’m lame jk I’m majoring in education (to teach history)

Old news but still relevant: Phyllis’s turn on: Rolodex systems 📇

“CRANE, as in the wading bird or industry lifting equipment, whichever you prefer” LOVE U PHYLLIS, YOU CORRECT HIM

PHYLLIS’S FACE WHEN GODFREY SUGGESTS SHE CAME OUT OF RETIREMENT, IM DEAD

“I shall consider retirement when I’m at the appropriate age” IM LAUGHING SO HARD, FUCK YEA PHYLLIS. I LOVE HER SO MUCH, LINDA BASSET IS ON THE LIST WITH LAURA AND HELEN OF PEOPLE WHO COULD PUCH ME IN THE FACE AND I’D THANK

LOL SHELAGH JUST STANDING AWKWARDLY LISTENING TO THIS CONVERSATION

“Buenos vacaciones” I NEED MORE PHYLLIS WORKING ON HER SPANISH I LOVE IT, Ella es oro.

lol the roof rack, bet it was Phyllis’s they borrowed when they moved

PHYLLIS’S FACE OF DISGUST WHEN DR GODFREY SMILES AT HER IS ME ALWAYS

LOL THE THE NURSES & SISTER WINIFRED DYING OVER PATRICK’S SHORTS (EVen though sister W “swears she’s not looking”)

I THINK THE SOCKS AND WHITE DAD SANDALS ARE MORE AMUSING 😂😂

Poor Judith💔

It’s a vicious attack Sister J! But you don’t know it yet so I get u

Here comes summer..😂

SETTING UP IN THE POURING RAIN LOL

Shelagh and Angela being adorable !!

Tim and Patrick proud that they set the tents up & boom it falls 😂 which is symbolic for me taking exams, I think I did well or at least decent on them and then I find out I failed by like 5 points

Nonnatus table scenes <3 😭

”I’ve seen more dangerous marshmallow bunnies“ lmao Pats this is a serious moment I shouldn’t laugh

Shelagh took off her glasses 😉😏 but fr how is Laura Main so perfect

Patrick put scotch in its lit, pass it over😏

Lol Shelagh drinking is a strange thought but I’m so here for it. Nuns can’t drink right? Idk. Imagine her drinking alcohol for the first time and just getting drunk 😂 we know Patrick and Tim are lightweights getting drunk off one beer so I assume shelagh would too😂

Damn it Patrick, you spilled your cup. Furthermore proving you’re a disaster 😭

LMAO SHELAGH’s “WTF” FACE WHEN SHE ASKS PATRICK WHAT HE’S THINKING ABOUT AND HE SAID THE ULCER CLINIC

LIKE C'MON PATRICK YOU KNOW WHERE SHELAGH WAS TRYNA GO WITH THAT😂

“And if you don’t mind my saying so, you’re not exactly Cliff Richards yourself” SHELAGH 😂😂 another great line of hers, love it

I love their playful banter lol we need more of that 😂 but lets be real series 6 has had some of the greatest Shelagh and Patrick moments so I can’t complain 😭😍

Peter and Barbara is such a unusual dynamic haha

“How is chummy?” Wait does Babs even know Chummy? I don’t even remember if they met tbh

But for real Shelagh did you really think Patrick would just forget about work completely ??

Lol Angela crying because she is petrified of squirrels😂😂and Shelagh running to her is so cute.

Why didn’t she just get rid of the *creepy* squirrel nutkin book? it seemed like they still had it in series 6 haha

rice pudding is I think the same as aroz con leche, lol it’s gross sorry

Diane’s water broke oh shit

the Turners all in the tent playing I spy bc it’s raining haha

I went camping for the first and last time this past summer w/ my sister in laws & her friends, it was awful 😂😂 I got like 100 mosquito bites that became welts, i literally slept in the car the second night & it was mid July fairly south of east coast aka it was humid and sticky af , there were wild horses that walked around..Thank God they brought alcohol cause it was a nightmare I don’t wanna remember 😂😂

ANGELA IS SO CUTE UGH & ANOTHER GREAT SHELAGH FACE😂

lol yes go to a hotel, should’ve done that from the get

So what exactly does Fred run? some civil defense thing?

She’s in labor and can’t even scream omg, I’m screaming

“They are often incorrect in their opinion” Sister MJ is a gem. I want someone to look at me the way Sister MJ looks at cake and the television

Phyllis yelling at Dr Godfrey😂

PATS’S FACE OF DISGUST IS ALSO ME

HOW DO THESE WOMEN GIVE BIRTH STANDING/SITTING UP?? AHHHH

There you are Beatrix, it’s been a while

Patsy being suspicious with the card game line lol. but when is Trixie going to find out about Patsy and Delia?

SHE RIPPED OUT HER WOMB?! WTF OMG IM SCREAMING

THIS HURTS TO WATCH AHH

Trixie and Sister MC to the rescue but omg this is wild I forgot

Fred wtf you can’t be sneaking up like that

DONT LEAVE SISTER MC ALONE TRIXIE

NOO, IM NOT PREPARED FOR THIS

“There are flowers on the table, and feathers in these pillows, that’s all the nature I need to get back to” I feel you Patrick lol, I like nature but not camping

Lol remember Shelagh’s old nightgown? ah I don’t miss it. The bri nylon is such a look™ & obviously has magically powers i.e this miraculous conception.

“..or they’ve been mulled to death by squirrels” IM DEAD HAHA THAT WAS A GOOD DAD JOKE, NICE ONE PATRICK

aw the baby is so precious

Why is the operating room/being in surgery called theatre in the U.K.?? and why is the doctor’s office/practice called the surgery? so many questions from a confused American..

Sister MC by the docks😭💔 she was just chillin with God and THIS HORRIBLE MAN RUINS EVERYTHING WTF UGH

Oh no

SISTER MC JUST UNCONSCIOUS ON THE DOCKS WTF IM CRYING WHY WOULD HURT HER

Patrick even if you were there she wouldn’t have called you, don’t blame urself

it’s not your arrogance sister MC!!

“don’t you even say the word fault, do you hear me, I won’t allow it” 😭💔 it’s NOT your fault sister MC 😰

I forgot how upset/hurt this episode makes me

“The worst thing is that I actually stopped to pray…” my heart hurts

You can’t even blame her for being angry😪

Judith you’re not a bad mother!! This isn’t your fault either

Sister MJ IN THE BATHROOM WITH HER😢😢💔💔 I’m c r y i n

I SAID PROTECT THEM AT ALL COSTS WHY DID THEY HURT ME LIKE THIS

Everyone so quiet at the table..

ILL FOREVER BE PROUD OF HOW BRAVE SISTER MC IS FOR SPEAKING UP FOR HER AND THE OTHER VICTIMS💖😭💔

Russian prison tats??

“I thought at first it was a test of faith, but it was a test of strength. I can bear more than I ever though I could and I can bear it for others because my strength is a gift, from him..” brb sobbing

I feel so bad for Mrs Hills bc I understand she thought she was doing the right thing and was trying to protect her daughter from the stigma & judgment from having a baby born outta wedlock 😭

But damn she almost killed her & now she can’t have any more kids

“I’m a mum, mum” Aw

lol I want children (obviously not anytime soon) but if I do Ima be shook for the rest of my life. Like my kids will be like grown & I’ll still wake up like wtf I had them? Lmaoo

SHELAGH’S GREY DRESS >>😍

Patrick jumping on the bed was cute lol

The Turners being cute and an unrealistically perfect family together as usual

Trixie 😍off to her AA💕

“I think it’s about time I came clean..”

Im so proud of her omg. She’s come so far in 6 series 😭💖💖😭

And Patsy and Delia are supportive yess👏🏼

“New truths were being spoken at Nonnatus house, but some remained concealed. While one voice rose, striving to erase its agony in song.”

Thanks Vanessa,, The End 😭

#call the midwife #lets get it 1962 #I'm too attached to this beautiful show #like TRASH for this show #my commentaries™

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survivornavarino · 6 years

Text

Episode #5: WE LANA DEL REY TONIGHT FAM -Rebecka

Back from exile so here's the happenings ~Immediately cried to Beckka about Tim leaving and being slaughtered in my arms. ~Messaged Trixie, well she messaged me about what happened our other tribal. ~Messaged all the favs cuz idc if Im at the bottom, im obviously bottom of fans or favs so WHATEVER. ~Talked a lot to Julia cuz we have a lot in common (Witchcraft, being 16 y/o babies, getting lit) ~Told all the favs I have no one in this game which is true. FAVS IF YOU LISTENING TAKE ME IN. PLEASE AND THANKS. ~Messaged Vi cuz at least she was with me.

Honestly what were they thinking with voting out Tee? I guess that's a challenge threat out of the way, so I won't complain.

https://youtu.be/HepZnpuimhM ________________________________________________________________ https://youtu.be/IJWWj23olkA

HAHAHAHAHAHA I LOVE LANA DEL REY SO MUCH NICE TRY AMIRADOR GET READY PUT ON UR ACRYLIC NAILS AND WINGED EYELINER WE LANA DEL REY TONIGHT FAM

So the bad news is I found out Drew has been hardcore dropping my name since the game started and I thought we were cool but it's fine snakes will be snakes. I think he's a little shook about my at bat (me having won 1/3 games I've played) cause he's hinted at how crazy that is. And that would explain why he's pulling out fake receipts and conspiracies to get me out. Whew game recognize game https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/ryans-reality-network/images/6/61/Awright_alyssa_edwards.gif/revision/latest?cb=20150724035546 The good news is Eddie is a real one, we really are Joe and Desi from HvHvH, and he spilled all the tea. And honestly we have a similar playing style so we're really about to go the distance, especially if I never get reunited with Julia or Rebecka. SO we need to slay this lip sync so we both live but on the off chance we lose, things are gonna kick into high gear. I've only seen one season of Survivor (HvHvH) but Tyler convinced me to watch Kaoh Rong and let me just say that has shed some light on things. Voting Jacob? Will always be there. Sending another fan out? No problem. Voting long-term? Now that's not a bad idea. So when I said, "What if we got Drew out?" Eddie was all ears. Obviously this is super early and under wraps BUT between the two of us we can make it happen. The key is Tyler and Jake so if we can get them we have a guaranteed majority. It all comes down to timing and the pitch. This is our best chance to clock Drew and whoever fails the vetting process will be left out. If Eddie says that whenever someone takes a shot at Drew they can't afford to miss and that has to be a blindside, then this plan has to be airtight. I wonder who could pull something like that off https://media.giphy.com/media/QmeB1Hr5fz7a0/giphy.gif

I volunteered to do the music video since I was a film major and have professional editing software. It puts a good deal of pressure on me because if we lose it looks like I really dropped the ball. However, I’m hoping that my attempts to organize us and edit the entire thing will earn me some respect and points from my tribe. It’s a bit frustrating getting ideas out of everyone. Nobody seems to want to volunteer thoughts or contribute to the brainstorming and we don’t have much time at all to get this done.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CdgOebQNYEE ________________________________________________________________ https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cdsZyoPZe5Q

First challenge on a new tribe and we lost. WHOOP DE DOO. Im going to try and find an in with the favs and hopefully stick with them. Saying how I have no allegience in this game. Also I keep forgetting that I can idol hunt so Im just casually at level 4 still I think. Ill probably look in the morning. But what were we thinking with Great Balls of Fire. That song is iconic and now that Tyler won he has chances of getting an in with people, but I want him gone Obviously no can do since I am not on his tribe anymore. Might as well dwindle down his numbers from this side then.

So we lost the lip sync. I had to apply lipstick for the first time so that was fun. Sadly one of us has to go home and my guess is it's either Heather, Trixie or Vi unless me or another favorite is getting targeted secretly. I need Heather and Trixie in the game if i'm being honest, mainly due to Trixie having rumors spread about her on the OG Admirador tribe and I wanna see if I can mess around with that. Then Heather was saying that people on the OG Admirador tribe were being fake to her, and she also told me Tyler got paranoid due to Heather not responding to Tyler's messages. So I hope Tyler makes it past merge, because I can work with paranoia. For those who don't know I'm trying a villainy thing and it's probably gonna fail miserably and I'm gonna look like a dumb fuck but I was the hero on my season and I wanted to try villainy out. I'm not good at long confessionals I apologize I feel like i'm the kid in the class presentation who speaks in a monotone voice and makes everyone fall asleep.

Me to the other tribe if/when i reach merge and we get to talk: https://desmadrechic.tumblr.com/post/171063789210/oh-god Ignore the caption that came with the video ajsjsjdkjd

So the other tribe voted out Tee and I'm a n g e r y The challenge was a music video. Still a n g e r y We won. Still a n g e r y!

So like this is bad for the fans, I feel like the faves will just band together and take the easy vote route, I need to socialise today. I need to just make strong social bonds and make sure people want to keep me around. I wanna act dumb and want them to think I am a free number for them. I like Drew and feel like he will be loyal to me, I am no 100% sure what Mitch and Autumn will do but I feel like they will keep me over Jake and Tyler if we end up going to tribal.

Well look at that I got added to a new alliance chat...! Autumn added me, Tyler, and Eddie to an alliance and we named it "Keyboard Smashers" and um I like everyone in it but I also like Drew...so I'm gonna protec him! If we lose and we're still on the same tribe I think I'd want to vote out Mitch since he hasn't made any efforts to talk to me individually. It's a shame bc I think we'd have a lot in common, but oh well! Tbh I have a feeling that we're gonna swap into 3 tribes of 5 next round...my psyche is telling me this...and I'm always right! But I hope I'm wrong because I feel like I'm in a really good position on this tribe and I'm scared to swap on a tribe with people from the other tribe because I think Heather and Vi wouldn't work with me, neither would the faves on the other side. Anyways...I'm a bad bitch.

We just did THAT and I'm happy for it. I've not gotten the chance to be as much if a social butterfly as I would like because my work situation is still adjusting, so if I can keep staying safe until merge that would be highly appreciated. HeatherAs of right now he vote is Vi. I dont agree with it since she is the only one who has been truthful to me in this game so far. But I dont see any way of saving her right now. My only choice I feel in this game is to team up with the favs and get out the fans, which I don't mind as long as that fan isn't me. Plus the fans (minus my loves Vi and Tim) all left me out of the vote. If they think I am going to crawl right back to them come another swap or merge, they have something coming. HOPEFULLY THIS VOTE ISNT ME OR ILL CRY.

So I'm just like really sad because I love vi and I never wanted to vote her out of this game but I have to and that's really sad. I don't really have much else to say I just feel super guilty.

du du du..... another fan bites the dust and another fan gone, another fan gone another fan bites the dust

Why is it that each tribal gets messier than the last? Well maybe I should back up. We lost... again. Wow what curse have we brought to this tribe. I call bs since we were nice enough to give an upbeat song. The judges are bias smh. Anyways literally no one talked. What vote who? I dunno. It’s super silent which brings bad news. Probably gonna have to expect to be voted out tonight. Oh well. Hopefully heather doesn’t get voted out but I feel like it’ll be another fan that’s gone. The favs know each other and so they’re banding together I believe. Such sadness. I’ll just have to wait until tribal to know tho

Oh, right, this is a thing I need to do. Anyway, same boring shit as always, I'd put "Drew won an immunity challenge" as my mood message but it could be about anything, really. I think there are only like two tribal challenges I've ever lost in Athena. Bonus points because it was the music video challenge so you know my ass floated by and gave it all of ten minutes of thought, but we had a damn savant on the tribe! I love it when tribe swaps work out well for me. People were expressing all this sadness for Trixie and Vi going to their fifth tribal in a row and I'm just sitting here like listen, any goddamn time someone wants to take my seat at tribal and give me the night off, they're welcome to it. Denise Stapley is a cute look on some people, I guess. I'm just fine over here with my Cirie Fields kickback realness, I don't need tribal council, y'all can wait until FTC to give me a torch as far as I'm concerned.

What's the haps? Stress, angina, and crippling anxiety. Anyway. We won immunity which I'm real happy about because I can nOT go to tribal council. I absolutely refuse to lose and I'm really hoping I just make it to merge without attending a tribal council. For some reason I feel like I will I will either go to like the tribal before merge and leave at the first tribal I attend or I will make it to merge without losing and I will be merge boot. I really am happy because I feel like if we went to tribal council Drew would have targeted Autumn which is something I am SOOOO against. I literally sold my soul to that girl and that's who I'm riding with for the rest of the game. So because I love ha so much I kind spilled the beans to her about Drew targeting her. I feel like really bad about it though cause I do consider Drew a close friend but for some reason I'm really having a hard time trusting him. I just feel like he's only with me until he doesn't need me anymore and then he'll totally see me for the threat that I am and take me out. I feel so bad about it but I just feel like it's what I needed to do to show Autumn that I trust her and have her back. Because of that I think Autumn would've gone after Drew and I feel like I would've had to pick a side and I really just can't vote Drew out yet njvjsdfkdnsjk. I would literally feel terrible about it cause I usually don't turn on my close allies pre-merge but if he goes after Autumn then I have no other choice. As I'm typing this I'm beginning to wonder why I didn't just tell Drew that I didn't want to vote Autumn out. Maybe he would've said ok we can target somebody else. Why don't I trust him enough to say that? Hmm idk I'm just so on edge. So a 4 person alliance was created and I'm soooooo happy. MY first alliance in this game! I finally feel have something I can maybe rely on and trust for a bit. It includes Autumn, Jake, and Tyler all of which I LOVEEEEE. Like omg this is my dream alliance I'm screaming. If we stick together we at least have enough to tie it. But who knows what will happen. I'm watching you JAKE >.>

#TurnUpTheHeat #confessionals

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