#like why cant you just leave some people alone

[bluravenite]

slight rant/vent

Though I'm also posting on twt at @bluravenite in case you want to interact with me outside of hate anons

Yk there's probably hate anons going around all the time but it's been really apparent this past week that some people genuinely don't know to shut the fuck up... I have stopped posting with the same frequency as i was bc i am working on commissions and drawing takes time but i might just keep a more sort of closed parasocial relationship/ treat Tumblr more as a portfolio than as social media if that keeps happening... Sorry that i rant in here a lot but it's genuinely exhausting sometimes when most of your mutuals on this app are getting rude anons...

#it's genuinely worrying bc it really makes you question what kinda people have it against u/ur friends #like why cant you just leave some people alone #and it makes me feel guilty too for wanting to also protect/defend my friends?? you know nothing about these people #but thats never an excuse to be such an asshole to people #once talked with someone who had me blocked here and they told me they didn't remember why but “clearly my values didn't align with theirs” #that still hurts because my values have always been to make this page safe for everyone #posting my silly little doodles and hoping it means something to people #because right now?? THIS is the closest I'll ever get to my dreams #so it really sucks that the closest thing to being a concept artist and freelance illustrator is seeing my friends getting hate for nothing #i might actually close comissions for the public after this... 1 because i need higher prices for my work #and 2 because i am unfortunately scared that im never gonna be good enough #because people who draw cant catch a fucking break sometimes #sorry for the rant again #raven vents

[pickled-flowers]

Also just because you get annoyed by something someone is doing doesn't mean they are evil you can leave us alone

#this is about autistic people. #that guy in you class that is always asking questions? he always raises his hand theres nothing wrong with it #it takes time in the class but that's how he makes sure he understands the subject #and meanwhile every other student decides hes an asshole #that girl who doesnt blink and who cant seem to have a linear conversation is not doing anything wrong #you dont like interacting with her but that doesnt say anything about her you can leave her alone you dont have to bitch behind her back #that person cant read social cues? why are you getting mad? can you shut the fuck up? #it is insane how often some of my friends talk about people who are clearly autistic and are mad at them #no its not because theyre autistic theyre just always interupting! #its not because theyre autistic they just make me uncomfortable! PLEASE LISTEN TO YOURSELF #i swear youre all asshole to us #no respect fr #its so annoying to see you run in a circle trying to justify calling someone an ass for doing literally nothing wrong #youre allowed to feel how you want about other people but you always jump to bullying #and whenever i try to make them realize they get so deffensive #just because you grew up with an autistic brother does not make you a fucking expert youre not even close to him!! #ok sorry im gonna go hit my bong im getting too angry lol

[martyrbat]

so many of you talk about the cruel adults in your childhood that negatively effected you and caused lifelong insecurity yet you're still perfectly fine with being that mean stranger to any kid that has the misfortune of existing around you and thats just really gross !!!

#like i get kids can be overwhelming for a various amount of reasons but its not going to kill you to treat children with basic human decency #adults can be just as overwhelming or annoying—if not more. yet if you talked to an another adult the same way you do to a kid #then ppl would fucking hate you and not want to be around you because youre not being cool and witty—youre just mean!!! #everyone has experienced the frustration of being a kid being mistreated by an adult. some more than others #rather its ignoring your bodily autonomy (from sa and assault to hugging you when you don't want to be touched to not letting you #make your own harmless choices like a haircut or whatever). everyone has been talked down to or had their opinion treated like its nothing #or that their thoughts or input doesn't matter. everyone has a childhood experience with a mean or judgemental adult #yet over and over ppl are fine just repeating that cycle of abuse and hatred #like youre a young adult and youre still getting treated like shit by older ones. but youre able to have a drink or you graduated or smthn #so now you feel like you earned that right to be judgemental & angry & mean to a group of people that didnt fucking do anything to you #anyways. this is because im sick and had to go to the store to get groceries and meds #so its a 20 minute walk to the nearest store in 108 degrees bc i dont have gas money and then in the store im ofc using a face mask #like im sweaty and feel disgusting and like shit but this kid was SO fucking excited about his spiderman toy and wanted to talk and #his mom said ‘i told you no one wants to hear about that crap leave her alone’ and like?? no fuck off let a kid be happy?? hes not fucking #doing anything wrong?? so we talked and he showed me the little tiy that lights up and asked if i saw the new spiderverse movie #and i told him i havent! so he asked why so i explained i have photosensitivity and what that means and why i cant see it #(‘even though i heard its super cool!’) and HE WAS SO SWEET... like immediately hid the toy because oh! flashing lights can hurt me! #and then immediately said dont worry because he'll tell me about it so its like i saw it instead! #and like. guys imma be honest with you. i stilm got no fucking idea what this movie's plot is. #but you bet your fucking ass i was pretending like i was following along & was going ‘no way!’ ‘so it's a parallel universe...?’ ‘oh wow!’ #like yea its unnecessary. i felt oike i was gonna collapse and im still struggling to breathe at home now. but also i been the kid #who just wanted to talk about my interests and no one wanted to or was dismissing it. #i know it's not a end of the world deal but i also know that crushing feeling. you gotta be the kindness you want to see in the world yknow #anyways. be nice to kids or im not going to be nice to you. they're one of the most vulnerable members of our society and deserves kindness

[lorisystem]

The nicest person in the world is the lady who helped me tie my shoes at 5ish years old so i could go play during recess. (I elaborated in the tags but theyre fairly long,,) -???

#ive already told this story to some people but i love to tell it. #ok so when i was young i only wore velcro shoes bc i couldnt tie laces. #even now i havent learned the proper knot that literally everybody has learned. idk why i just cant commit it to memory but to be fair #i havent tried to learn it in years bc now i learned a different way to tie my shoes which takes longer so everybody is always like why do #you take so long tying your shoes. #but anyway this story is when i was around 5 maybe younger or maybe older but max 7 yrs old. #my mom only bought me velcro shoes since i couldnt learn how to tie my shoes normally and at some point trying to learn made me so #frustrated i just refused to try and cried etc. #so anyway in my old school there was this weird rule ive never seen anywhere else that we had to use other shoes in the class #i guess to avoid dirtying the floors or something. #and one time my mom bought me new shoes with laces and threw my old shoes probably thinking id have to learn it. i didnt lol. #so she tied my shoes in the morning and then i went to school changed shoes and like i had to like. put back my lace shoes on to go outside #for recess. now get that the teacher hated me. not sure why you would hate a child this age. but she was usually mean to me. #so when she saw this issue she was rlly annoyed and told me so and like the first few days she tied my shoes so i could go outside. #and idk after 2 or 3 times she got rlly tired of doing it and said i had to do it by myself. and she just like fucking left and went outside #leaving me alone on the staircase. #and now this building had a 2nd story which was like a house or flat where people lived. and they were totally unrelated to the school afaik #but the lady was always rlly nice. so she happened to be going down to go outside and about her day and she saw me crying by myself on the #staircase and said whats wrong and i told her i cant tie my shoes and she just helped me and consoled me and then i could go. #anyway she was an angel to me. #its hitting me now as i tell this that when i was a child many of the adults around me were really mean #so i really imprinted on nice adults like i thought they were really amazing and the best people ever. #anyway thank you for reading my story!! #lorisys

[dockaspbrak]

i have no idea how to deal with people trying to get me to stop talking to them 😵‍💫 I guess I know im annoying so i tend to be overly talkative and kind of annoying so i suppose I tend to overthink it

#i had a long friendship for years with a girl who made me insist like several times over the course of the friendship that i wouldnt give up #on her? #so it was weird when she inevitably ghosted me i think i kept texting her for too long after but she was really skittish #and had trouble keeping up with people because she was so dissociative #i guess at some point i should just decide oh this person clearly doesnt give a shit about me? why do i keep trying but #idk im so bad at making and keeping friends. i think i tend to be a bit too open minded about clear signs i should probably #leave someone alone #i wish people would be more comfortable just saying hey its been great but i cant really fit you into my life i wish you well #sigh #regans going away tomorrow for a trip so im a bit melancholy

[raredrop]

as someone who went from fearing chargers, to sometimes using chargers, to maining them (and by them i mean mostly just the e-liter scope i used more in 2 than i do now)

watching people who do not play chargers play the e-liter for the first time or any sort of reason i just go YUP THATS IT START CRYING UNTIL U HIT A SICK SNIPE AND THEN BASK IN UR SECONDS OF FAME THAT NO ONE ELSE CARES ABOUT

#like i was a shooter main through 1 and 2 with some dabbling in various weapons in 2 usually chargers #during the rock paper scissors splatfest i said this was gonna be the start of me actually maining the eliter #id say in 2 my main was like...the jr..... #im also not into competitive play...i like watching videos going into things but im casual and ranked is something i only...sometimes play #but not enough to rank #chargers are like either confidant in their playing or like me stressed #and tho i cant say im like a pro charger despite the time i put into the eliter....i mean its still me after all #it is very...different from the other classes bc most of the time ur not gonna be good at holding a fight up close unless u get VERY lucky #but thats just me and i am maining the slowest charger with a scope #also watching someone talk about the comp nature of splat and how chargers will probably pick up the ballpoint like #i DO not like splatlings...way too awkward for me to play #i get one in salmon run its over its over hang up ur slops bc its over #the cool thing about the eliter is that sometimes you'll match with people who just want to leave you alone #the not cool thing is that people will also very much want to chase you down bc u got caught #mid repositioning #again im not a splat pro i just play casually so ur not gonna get actual good tips from me #also sorry if anyone acutally reads my tag rants bc they can get really long and idk why i dont kjust put all of this in the post itself any #anyway....

[bookstoresmp3]

the girlies on tiktok are messing with the wrong spirits and they not gonna learn until they start dying

#remember when they were spreading around v*odoo and bruja spells/traditions #also trying to appropriate hatian/yoruba ceremonies and ‘spells’ #and just in general being very reckless with the information they shouldnt have #they dont realize that ppl have died from messing with this witchcraft stuff #like or not these spirits are real 😭 and im saying that as a CHRISTIAN #im yoruba when i tell you those witch doctors be summoning the craziest spirits and using a dangerous power to do so #it’s real and only certain families/people can practice it #and these families gatekeep that information AS THEY SHOULD #thats why you cant just google ‘how to do v**doo’ #and whatever the tiktok witches think theyre doing is NOT what theyre doing 😭 #bc they shouldnt even know some of the things they know to begin with #the powers theyre messing around with kill people!!!!!! 😃 #now theyre trying to do this weird sirenmaxxing thing #where they tap into the power of lilith #BABY THATS NOT LILTH UR CALLING 😭😭 #my mom told me once abt witchcraft ‘you think ur talking tk ur dead uncle phil when really ur contacting an evil spirit’ #anyways when yall start losing yalls lives you will learn #bc this is not to be played around with #idk why white people always have to participate in smth #WHY CANT YALL JUST LEAVE THINGS ALONE #simi speaks

[isa-ghost]

🅱️ruh

#rant incoming #dont rb or ill block you btw #just in case bc some people on this hellsite be like that #I haven't said anything genuinely or intentionally aggressive on this site in forever #and I keep getting anons bitching at me about being ?????? #Ok just unfollow then?? I'm not intentionally doing shit. #yall are misreading and making assumptions and then attacking over it??? #1. its really annoying 2. ive clarified my intended tone w like 2 dif people #but they continued assuming my tone was negative anyway?? like. what happened to 'if you arent sure just ask op what tone they meant' #long time followers know that the brand(tm) here is light heartedly being a loud passionate shithead. why are people getting pressed. #and again: why are people getting pressed instead of just curating their experience and leaving my blog alone :/ #im gonna get paranoid everyone just chooses to take every single thing i say seriously & thinks im a hateful pos or some shit again 🙃 #either ask me to clarify tone or leave my blog if you cant handle the energy here. i dont want to hear it. esp when youre mistaken abt it

[snekdood]

ig my biggest issue with fandoms is the almost... false closeness thats there in them? ig since i was a kid and wasnt good at enforcing boundaries and was just excited to find ppl with the same interest I didn't really think about it but be real like, there was a vibe that it was "okay" and "fine" to expose a lot about ourselves to eachother that... i think if we knew eachother irl... we'd hafta be a lot closer than that to see or hear about that stuff...

#like ig am i the only one who thinks its kinda weird when ppl would pass fanfics around?? #ig its just kinda normal now or whatever but think about it. youd hafta be closer friends with someone- besides just sharing an interest- #to see their slash fics right?? doesnt it seem kinda weird that ppl used to be so willing to toss that out there #ig the level of anonymity helps but my point isnt rly about the fics so much as it is... sharing information thats personal to you #i definitely didnt know how to assert boundaries as a kid- like i just didnt know it was an option for me to be like 'no i dont want to do #that' -wow that sounds really fucked up outloud huh! #ig my autonomy was taken from me so much as a kid i kinda just assumed i wasnt the one who got a lot of choices #and no one really taught me enough about internet safety .-. my mom did once but... she didnt push very hard #and that ended me up in a lot of shitty situations- like on here. how i posted a pic of myself when i was a fuckin child #sexualizing myself and some adult commented something suggestive back to me and ig i just. thought i had to accept the situation #like i just. thought it was ok to happen. ig since i had so many ppl rob me of my bodily autonomy before that it just seemed normal #or at the very least it was something i couldnt change so i didnt try and at the time figured i had to accept as normal #and since no one intervened to tell me what any of those ppl did to me was wrong i just. didnt think about how it effected me or if that #even mattered #so why is my life so dark exactly whys it gotta be like this tho #ig its kinda hypocritical of me to post this. i mean i use my account as like a diary sometimes or that im just yelling into the void lol #but thats also kinda because of all of this honestly. i think i realized i didnt want it to be that way for a while and stopped #but after all the shit with my abuser on here its like.. i feel like i cant not be as open as i am? #idk its like... a testimony or something ig. idk how to describe it. ig i just feel like ill always hafta be defending myself online from #everything. and if i dont talk about every little thing that makes me fucked up then people wont leave me tf alone about shit i cant contro #or change. like i cant go back in the past and not do whatever. but also as far as any actual harm ive done there isnt really... much there #ive had shitty ideas normalized to me sure but i dont really feel like i passed those ideas on to anyone really

[kittykatinabag]

While I greatly enjoy the subject of place making in urban design, I utterly hate the amount of pandering to capital holders a lot (if not most) of current "place making professionals" do in their work.

#also really hate some of the current trends of 'pop up events' that run for maybe a month and then never again #'its to get peoples imaginations going kristen!' until you realize that you dont actually leave any reliable framework when its done #and theres an inherent bias against creating those frameworks because that requires decentralization of your knowledge #which makes you and your work finacially threatened and even as a nonprofit you still need to make a living #idk im just pondering webs of power and the paradoxes of creating a better world using capitalism instead of dismantling it #also avoiding doing the newest academia bs and trying to avoid any fucking grades talk with the people i know here #because i havent told them that i havent turned anything in yet because depressions been kicking my ass #and they dont get the executive dysfunction part of it because their anxiety is so out of control that it still forces them to do things #and their reward circuits in their brains still work while mine dont anymore #and while they might have sympathy all theyre going to do is suggest solutions which is not what i need rn #also the solutions they will probably give probably wont work because ive tried pretty much off of them except cocaine #and im trying to avoid doing that for obvious reasons #i already know what i need is to 1- live alone; 2- live in a place with more amenities nearby; and 3- have an understanding support system #the problem is money. and circumstances. and having a support system. but mostly money and circumstances #the thing i cant figure out quite yet is why im avoiding telling them instead of just laying it out there #maybe cause it would seem like im putting part of this burden on them? #maybe something in my instincts and years of social observation is telling me that if i tell them their view of me will drastically change? #and then there goes whatever scraps of a support system i have out here #idk its probably just trauma leaking again #late night ramblings

[cinnabeat]

its like omg none of this makes sense boo hoo when actually every single seemingly bullshit ability is entirely based on the game it came from

#on the yellow arc rn #leave my girlie ALONE 😭 #some people are like why are they using this move when THIS move is more powerful #or like this move doesnt even work like that #when its like actually at the time which was deadass more than 2 decades ago #u know when there was ONE generation #the moves worked like that :) #thats like going omgg this pokemon is a fairy type it should be more effective #or whatever the fuck like bitch fairy types werent even INVENTED at this point shut the fuck UPPPP #bitches cant be trusted with reading ANYTHING thats dated #im Mad #michi tag #AND EVEN THEN IT DOESNT MATTER CAN YOU NOT JUST ENJOY IT HOW IT IS 😭 #do u gotta rip it to shreds like this isnt even how it works like fuck OFF

[seilon]

hhdgsgddhh

#there’s something very wrong with my brain #I can’t. manage it #in the middle of the day I just suddenly switched moods and despite my friend already being over and me having been perfectly happy with #that like the whole week up til that point I just. started getting overwhelmed and now im getting annoyed by everything and I want to be #alone but I can’t just out of the blue to actually I don’t want you here. no real reason. i just. cant do it. leave #I’ve just. been getting progressively more upset by little things i reslly shouldn’t care about that much and I’ve gotttn to the point #where I’m not sure how I’m gonna get out of bed and like. interact #some of the things getting to me are decently valid but they’re not exactly his fault or things that should be making me angry or whatever #I know that logically #but yeah #I just. #im. out of nowhere not okay my mood just plummeted and I don’t wanna open up to anyone or change my routines and stuff for anyone #I don’t know man #kibumblabs #delete later #I guess I should’ve seen the crash coming. #I’ve been too productive lately to not crash at some point and go into a fun hermit depression spiral #I don’t know why I get so. mean spirited when I get like this #like I just. want to push people away and don’t trust them and I don’t know

[oflgtfol]

we are in fact closing w 3 people today thank the lord so after about an hour of recovering the store my heart has stopped racing as badly but im gonna be on register for potentially the whole night starting at like 7:20-7:30 but hopefully by then there will be so frw customers that it’ll be calm

#i started my shift literally fucking crazy #manager told me to cover cashiers break #im trying to get up to the regusters some instacart guy calls me over #man i respect the side gig people but instacart people are so fucking annoying they make you shop for them basically #like i can tell you where an itsm is located the general zone but why are you making me go item by jtem and finding the precise item #for a 10+ item shopping cart #like dude i have a JOB TO DO and its not shopping for other people thats your job !! leave me alone #and then my password to my app isnt fucking working so i cant even look up locations anyway #and then in the midst of this some lady asks me to unlock something im like give me 5 minutes #finally get away from instacart guy #get #ge the key. its the wrong key. she needed the manager only key #so i call the manager over #then i FINALLY go up to regusters #and then theres 5 people on line the phone is ringing #i was literally about to have a heart attack i was already shaky and trembling before i even clocked in #but that whole mess set me over #i was so frantic checking people out talking a mile a minute not even being a human i was just a cashier robot #got people done and checked out within like a single minufe each like get the fuck out of my sight im having a heart attack #brot posts

[rslashrats]

🪰 housefly734 Follow

just a reminder that flies rubbing their hands together =/= plotting a nasty scheme

🪰 r0tt1ngm3at Follow

FINALLY SOMEONE SAID IT!! I HATE THE STEREOTYPE THAT US RUBBING OUR HANDS TOGETHER MEANS WE ARE PLANNING SOMETHING DUBIOUS!!

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

^^ Boosting! I constantly get non-flies giving me death glares whenever I wash my hands in the restroom. Like, that's what you're supposed to do after going to the bathroom! Sorry for being hygienic I guess 🙄

🪰 diptera-doll Follow

Reasons why flies might be rubbing their hands together:

It's chilly out and they're trying to warm up

They just put hand sanitizer/lotion/hand cream on

They're rolling a ball of clay together

What you should do if you see a fly rubbing their hands together:

Leave them alone! It's none of your business

Hope this helped! :)

🪰 flyhlghh Follow

people also forget that hand-rubbing is a very common stim!! neurodivergent flies constantly get stigmatized for showing any traits of their neurodivergencies in public!! please don't forget that!!

🐝 iamrealflytrustme Follow

I dont know about you losers but i like to rub my hands together because i am planning the most heinous and villanous crimes in my head

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

Wow, most obvious troll I have ever seen in my life. Get a life, dude 🙄

🪰 compoundeyehaver Follow

> claims to be a real fly

> has bee as their profile pic

dude couldn even get the right insect for their shitty troll account LMFAOOOOO

🐝 iamrealflytrustme Follow

No i am real fly and i am plotting to land on someones pie rn and ruin it with all my real fly germs. rubbing my hands together as i do it too

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

Anyone wanna bet this guy is some amphibian from 4frog typing this nonsense from their lilypad right now? Just me? Okay-

🐝 iamrealflytrustme Follow

I am buzzing around people's ears now

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

Yep, that pretty much confirms my theory. The nerve of some non-flies, I swear 🙄

🪰 batsianmimc Follow

@venus-fly-trap-hater

🪰 venus-fly-trap-hater Follow

this post is so real!! tysm babe for sending it to me 💞 ilyy

🪰 batsianmimc Follow

ILY too sugar cube 😘

🐝 iamrealflytrustme Follow

Can you guys stop kissing on this post its ruining my evil scheme planning

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

Can't believe this guy is still at it, honestly. @staff @tumblr Please take action against fake fly troll accounts such as these ones!

🐝 iamrealflytrustme Follow

Staff cant kill me i rubbed my hands on them too hard and they dieded sorry

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

🤣🤣🤣 Oh the excuses this fake is making, LOL! I haven't been this entertained since the Bombylius major discourse last year!

🪰 compoundeyehaver Follow

why are you still arguing with the troll instead of just blocking

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

Just think it's entertaining to see the lack of logic that bounces around in the brains of these non-flies sometimes 🤷‍♀️ Every response this so called "I am a real fly, trust me" user has given me has just made me crack up and flap my wings together.

🐝 iamrealflytrustme Follow

I am gonna rub my hands and plan more evil schemes involving you next

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

Heh, just try it, kid. Go on, I'll wait. 🥱

🦗 chirpingboy Follow

things are getting heated in the fly community

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

Of course a Grasshopper has the nerve to comment something insensitive on this post. Honestly, just mind your business 🙄

🦗 chirpingboy Follow

okayy

🦗 hopping-along-the-bank Follow

Hey, you can't really preach for not discriminating against flies and then discriminate against a grasshopper, dude. Not cool.

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

I think I certainty can, with my past experiences of Grasshoppers always finding the ways to say the most uneducated and baseless takes on my previous posts and discussions. Plus, after the Fly-Grasshopper War of 247 BC (in which my ancestors fought in, mind you) and the consequences that followed it, I think I am well within my rights. But go ahead, frame me as the bad guy here. 🤣

🦗 hopping-along-the-bank Follow

Yeah, you say this and conveniently ignore the socio-economic struggles that grasshoppers have been facing for the past century, many of these issues which were spearheaded by fly conservative politicians in office at the time.

So, yeah, it is rather hypocritical for you to pull out these cards when grasshoppers have also been punished and gotten the short end of the stick throughout bug history.

🪰 crane-fly-wives Follow

The implication that all flies are responsible for a few greedy politicians is quite comical, really. 🥱 Not to mention that many Grasshopper politicians in Bugland and Bugtopia have also had histories of introducing laws that have severely affected communities majorly made up of Flies. But sure, keep arguing with me about this, buddy. I got all day 🤣

🐝 iamrealflytrustme Follow

I am still rubbing my hands and planing schemes btw

🪰 flythatlovestogethigh Follow

anyone smoke bug weed in this thread

#bugs #insects #long post

[atrirose]

͏͏𝒗𝒊. ͏MORE THEN JUST FRIENDS ! enha ͏ ͏ ͏͏  ͏— ͏ ͏ ͏͏  ͏해찬 ͏ ͏& ͏ ͏𝐢

bsf(?)enha x f!reader. warning. none, kissing in jake’ + fluff wc.0.9k 🐰 seiu?!: after a century i’m writing hcs again yayy

— HEESEUNG LEE

let’s you bite him, very weird behavior but he has grown used to it, at first he was all confused as to why you feel the need to bite him like a chew toy but it’s okay your best friend(?) get you now, his biceps nom nom, but due to all this he has bite marks all over him which he is least bothered about but he does get asked if he is dating someone a lot which is confusing because why would people just assume he is dating out of the blue “yn you know i have been asked three times today whether im seeing someone and it’s all because of the bite marks you leave, people would think we are dating”

“do you want that to be a reality” he looks at you with wide eyes “are you hearing yourself” — “i am heeseung”

— JAY PARK

wears your hair tie which very bf coded and i wonder why he hasn’t asked you out yet? like which bestie goes around wearing a girls hair tie when he obviously is in the market? wearing it just makes you thing he is taken “do you love my hair tie that much you can’t even return it to me? YOU CANT RETURN MY OWN HAIR TIE TO ME” shoves a piece of cake in your mouth to shut you up “is it bothering that much, i will buy you more” which is weird because why not just return the one he has on his wrist, at this point he just wants be a wife.

“keeps me away from girls you know” oh so now he is just using you as an escape mechanism “keeps me a step closer to you” your ears turned red “so you wanna date me?” you ask

“that’s very multifaceted question” you hit his shoulders “big meanie” he giggled knowing damn well he is down right bad for you

— JAKE SIM

don’t at him but he has kissed you, like a full blown kiss not just a peck, for training purposes right? yes for training purposes so you both don’t seem like complete losers with no experience when you start dating someone, you can at least put each others name on the resume “do you wanna kiss?”

“no” jake looked at you with puppy eyes “why not” just because this is not WHAT NORMAL FRIENDS DO MR.HOT AND GENIUS BESTIES “your breath smells bad” eyes out like that sad hamster on tiktok with violin bg playing “UGH WHATEVER” you kiss him as he smiles between the kisses, knowing you can’t resist him (damn hot mf) “love ya see you after the match”

— SUNGHOON PARK

takes you on dates, and i get that it’s normal but it’s not normal when he is taking you out alone with him every other week to ‘treat you’, because normal friends totally don’t eat at a fancy restaurant together or go on a late night drive without romantic feelings like girl who are you kidding? “don’t you ever think all this dates we go to without our other friends who you reject because you only want to be with me is the reason why people think we are dating”

“yes” he said cuddling you on his bed “and like this is not normal too you cuddling me, WAIT WHAT YES?” he kissed you forehead “yes but we aren’t just friends either you know” butterflies

— SUNOO KIM

cuddles all the time, whether it is out, in school or hanging out at each others houses, you both are all up each others, which has been pointed out so many times but sunoo really doesn’t care, he would rather feel your soft cheeks next to his than hear people about how this can be a whole scandal and lower the chances of you both getting any partners because people think you both are dating “sunoo can i get some water please i’m dehydrated” you try to wiggle out of the sofa you both were cuddling “nooo i will be cold”

“no you won’t be ugh get off me big baby” you try to push him as he gets up “so now you hate me” obviously he is faking it but you feel bad “im not i’m sorry sunoo what do you want me to do”

“date me”

— JUNGWON YANG

unusually long eye contact, and not the staring contest kinda way, but a loving and soft way, like he is expressing how much he loves you by staring at you, even when you are not looking at him he is always admiring you, asked at multiple occasions why he was staring at you and he just replies with ‘can’t i look at my best friend’ like sure so normal for a bestie to look at his bestie with love doe eyes. so the way he looks at you with undivided attention you might think he is listening to everything you are saying but no you got him wrong.

he humming at you talking about some dog you found cute on tiktok but he isn’t actually really listening and registering anything you are saying, he too busy admiring your plump lips that he would give anything to kiss right now “and then a blue cat said heya bro” he still looking at you “hmm that’s cool”

“YANG JUNGWON YOU ARE NOT LISTENING TO ME” you said shaking him “i guess not, it’s hard to control myself from kissing you and still listen to you, i can’t multitask like that”

— RIKI NISHIMURA

has your face as his alternate face lock id, also lets you use his phone, you want his phone real quick okay have it, you want to see through his photos okay have it, you want to use his insta okay use it, the only thing you are off limits is the boys gc because shady business goes down there, people really think you are dating your bestie and how he is the most honest and trustworthy bf ever? like no he has thousands of feet pics in his camera roll and you haven’t heard any explanation from him yet? how is he honest.

“you are going through my dms?” riki asks as you play around with his phone “yeah and if that bothers you don’t worry im texting this pretty girl who slide in your dms, soon you would have a cute girlfriend all because of my rizz” he snatched his phone from your hands “what the hell i thought i blocked her? yn why are texting her-”

“why? did you get offended? i’m sorry i shouldn’t have, no matter how close we are” he face palms like an old man done with everything “i’m not offended because you texted her, i’m offended at the fact that i have such a dumb friend who can’t see i want her more then just friends” there star struck aren’t you

#enhypen headcanons #enhypen scenarios #jake x reader #niki x reader #sunoo x reader #jungwon x reader #jay x reader #heeseung x reader #sunghoon x reader #sunoo imagines #sunghoon imagines #park jay imagines #sim jake imagine #jungwon imagines #niki imagines #niki scenarios #jungwon scenarios #enhypen imagines #enhypen x reader #heeseung scenarios #enhypen #sunghoon scenarios #enhypen reactions #enhypen oneshots #sunghoon fluff #yang jungwon #niki fluff #can u see how i love riki

[kingkatsuki]

Old man Bakugou (who isn’t even that old, but god I want him)

Warnings: 18+, retired!Pro-Hero Dynamight, Bakugou is 50, reader is like half his age or more or less idc but Bakugou is older.

Bakugou retires at fifty. It’s much younger than a lot of other heroes that have paved the way for him, and yet he’s accomplished so much that it’s time for him to step aside for the future Pros. The ones that still have so much drive and energy, and are ready to conquer their dreams just like he was.

It gives up a place in the top five rankings for another younger, keen Pro-Hero to take his place. But of course Dynamight is still popular, and he’s still got a loyal fan base that continue to adore him even into his retirement.

Bakugou is still recognised when he goes out to restaurants and coffee shops, full of people trying to grab his autograph or share stories of how they grew up with him and watched him reach number one.

And then there’s you— he meets you one night at a bar when he’s nursing a beer, trying to adjust to having a free schedule instead of protecting the city. And he can’t help but notice the way your eyes glisten when you notice him, leaning against the bar beside his stool as you tilt your head inquisitively.

“No way, you’re Dynamight? My mom used to love you.”

And once again Bakugou is reminded of just how old he is, his blond hair now mixed with wisps of silver, the thick stubble that frames his jaw well on its way to being a beard, his muscular chest now curved with soft pudge and blond hairs and his back aches as he sits on the barstool.

“She had the biggest crush on you when she was younger,” You take a seat beside him as you sip at your own drink, “Had posters and figures up of you and everything.”

Bakugou doesn’t know how it happened— or why a pretty young thing like you wants anything to do with him. He’s gotta be twice your age, maybe more— but the casual conversation continues and you’re practically leaning into him now, pretty eyes glazed over as you stare down at his lips.

“I’ve always wondered what it would be like to fuck an old man,” You tease, but you should be careful what you wish for, “Can you even still get it up?”

Bakugou reckons he should have you over his knee for that comment alone, but that’s all it takes for him to have his beer bottle slamming down onto the bar as he grabs you by the wrist.

Barely ten minutes later Bakugou has your knees pushed up to your chest inside the dingy dive bar bathroom. Your knickers bunched around them to keep your thighs together as he rams his thick, hard cock inside your tight cunt. The ferocity of his thrusts unlike anything you’ve felt before and you’re certain you can feel him in your lungs. Your naive hole squelches around him, your essence leaking out of you and soaking his heavy balls as the only words that leave your lips now are incoherent babbles. Your hands cling to him for some semblance of reality, painted nails leaving crescent-shaped moons in his forearms. Your grip rough enough to break his skin and join the multiude of scars that already marr his body.

Your head knocks against the mirror with each cant of his hips but you could care less. The pleasure surging through your veins has your mind hazy, his hulking body practically folds you in two as he looms over you, burying his cock inside you to the hilt as you feel so full.

You’re positive you look debauched. Your pretty lipstick ruined as it’s smeared across your lips and cheeks, certain you’re drooling down your chin as he fucks you within an inch of your life. It’s nothing like the inept men around your own age you’d been with before. With age comes experience, and you’re certain you see heaven when a calloused thumb slips between your bodies to press against your puffy clit.

“Be careful what you wish for, sweetheart,” He groans, “This old man’s gonna have you gushin’ all over his cock.”

#Bakugou smut