#like yeah thats the bit i struggle with

[yakitori-queen]

all the advice on moral ocd ive been trying to find online is like "well you cant ever know for sure if youre a good or bad person you just gotta learn to live with the uncertainty" like yea thats the point brother. you nailed the exact thing i dont know how to do

#ocd equivalent to anxiety advice being like 'you just have to worry less' #like yeah thats the bit i struggle with #moral ocd #scrupulosity #ocd #mental illness

[autisticaradiamegido]

day 99

i have NEARLY finished the skirt for my ren faire fit i just gotta get a few finishing details added and also get the undershirt bleached (bc i got a bunch of makeup on it at last years fair and shit Stained) but THEN i can show yall the final fit!!

#day 99 #year 5 #aradia megido #homestuck #its gonna be cute #i was so fucking stressed abt this one because like. #i bought my fabric and i was like oh yeah dude this is toooootally more than enough for a circle skirt #went to finally cut things #realized i only had enough for a half-circle skirt and it would end up with a bunch of weirdly-shaped scrap at the end #(ie i would have to do a bunch of weird piecing to make the waistband and pockets and such) #and like honestly a half-circle skirt was NOT enough volume for me i need my skirts swooshy #so i was like well. okay. i think i can optimize my fabric usage more if i draft a paneled skirt #but this of course required..... Math. #and unfortunately. i was an art major. so. there was a lot of struggling #BUT I DID IT. THERE WAS STILL A LIIIIITTLE BIT OF PIECING THAT HAD TO BE DONE BUT IT IS MINIMAL AND CAMOUFLAGED PRETTY WELL #and also this is for a ren faire primarily bc i dont wear a lot of skirts in day-to-day #SO. economical fabric usage is absolutely period accurate. even though none of the rest of my outfit or techniques are. #basically all thats left for me to do is add pockets and the closure at the back #i meant to add the pockets as i was doing the main construction but i got too excited and forgor #so theres gonna be some seam ripping but nothing too bad

[cathalbravecog]

veep dad comfort art

#veep dad :] #i have Not been well mentally tbh the second im with friends i DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE anyways ill be VENTING A TINY BIT HERE #i need excitement in my life but im like #has no social life #oopsies...! #so i thought yknow what would make me happy rn. My Veep Dad #yea thats it #also ive been struggling with motivations to play ttcc and draw so.... #apologies for being in the game less. especially as im in the post game with almost everything done #im usually kinda really goal oriented in games and yeah having no tasks or close friends to play with #im just kinda THERE and getting that initial push to do stuff is very hard #my motivation has just been at an all time zero (again) and it upsets me bc i do wanna do stuff...not bc ohh productivity but bc #i just wanna HAVE FUNNNN #anyways erm.... thanks for listening to my little rant here again. i dont know where else to express this sort of stuff. feels wrong to dum #it on strangers who i know are there for my art but. whatever. yknow #just wish i was more motivated in general but my life is Just Kinda Sad and im an Antisocial Anxious Wreck Dear Cog #senior vice president #sr vp #veep dad #personal tag if i dont wanna main tag.... #doodles #traditional art #guz art #toontown

[skitskatdacat63]

Orb...

+ process kinda

#istg lineart is just a horrible terrible thing LOL #i sketch and it goes very well and i am very happy and i feel very creative!!! #i have to do lineart and it makes me want to give up the piece ..... #i get to paint and im like omg i could do this for hours !!! this is so fun !!!!!! #thus: orb #im very happy w it so thats why im posting #idk how long the actual piece is gonna take so might as well post a little sneak peak ig #lmfao i gave up on the crown bcs it was too complicated and then drew this. maybe the crown will come back. prob not #im surprised w the process of this. i usually struggle a lot w accurately referencing real life things #and i usually end up tracing them just to understand how the form works #and god ive drawn so many complicated things for this piece and havent had to trace at all???? okay????? #i mean ofc its not entirely accurate bcs the craftsmanship on the original orb is actually insane #but i think ive got it down p well :) #ill have to try to make the gold look a bit better at some point later on but for now its !!! #i like how half my art i post here is either chibis #or just the most brainrot intense historically detailed shit ever #yes no one i talk to probably knows what a globus cruciger is but GOD DAMN IT IM GONNA DRAW IT ACCURATELY #had this thought ^ when i looked at my top posts and my last post was those nando chibis #and then after a week of not drawing after that im like yeah let me draw several imperial relics #catie.art.

[arolesbianism]

Another quick drawing from last night

#keese draws #eternal gales #oc posting #oc #ocs #oc art #experimented a lil bit with giving her some more visible dark fur #I think I like it but Im gonna have to draw her a few more times to make sure I think #my main concern is that it might make her look a lil too similar to mason pattern wise #which is already smth Ive struggled with in the past lol #also yeah I <3 using brushes incorrectly #idc what the creators of any given brush intended if I can use it for funky lineart I Will use it for lineart #also yeah Ive been grabbing a bunch of free brush packs lately so thats why Im actually drawing shit again lol #tbf the glory drawing was me wanting to use a base procreate brush Ive been meaning to mess around with but I used some texture brushes too #with all my new texture brushes making bullshit backgrounds will be a breeze 👍 #oh also Ive been trying to use those dumb layer filter mode thingies for the first time lately with my shading #idk how Im feeling abt them tho tbh multiply is nice ig but I kind of dont like how it dulls out the colors sometimes #like I know it makes the shading more coherent but idk sometimes I like the more grading shading #idk can yall even tell the different dndmdkdndh #I might just be being too picky with my colors or smth I always tend to assume the worst abt my colors #anyways sceduled and now eepy time from the past and good morning future me

[wayward-wren]

Maybe this is me being bitter because of 10+ moves in my childhood but I'm always a bit disappointed and see it as a cop-out when children's shows tease the main family moving and then don't follow through

#wren rambles #this is mostly about bluey i think #havent seen the new episodes so im not sure if theyre actually following through with it #but it just feels like a bit of a slap in the face to me #girl meets world did this as well #idk man there's just something about seeing characters be afraid of leaving everything behind #and then not facing that fear #the general message is 'its best for the kids to stay behind with their friends' #but. is it? #does that mean i didnt have the best childhood i could have? #idk man. i think it would be interesting to see them commit #like yeah it would mess up the entire status quo of the show and have to introduce new characters and all #but like. i think it would mean a lot to kids like me who never stayed in one place for long to see their struggles addressed #sometimes you DO have to move and leave everything behind #and sometimes it IS good. #and sometimes its horrible and sucks but thats still life

[pyrriax]

im being normal (my not-cats look prettier than ever i totally didnt forego writing to decorate a few of them)

the ones without a lot of decor are ones that have jobs that dont Give decor items very often (or are new) since i like to put the decor the not-cat collects on that not-cat :3

((the two i was working on decorating were agate and vaccon since i saw the perfect opportunity))

#haunted ecosystem #also YES i know delilah is a bit cluttered he was decorated when he was a baby 👍 i need to decide a palette & theme for him #also im debating whether i focus on trying to get a violet eyed albino for a fancat or if i just get a null like i planned #rn my only null is honey and she has the WORST stats (literally my lowest stat not-cat) #if i get the time i might work on custom decor for some fancats since i'm struggling to find what i need for them #oooh. i might get a violet eyed albino for a DIFFERENT fancat <- just had the idea for a ro fancat. oh. thatd be FUN. #i have some decor in mind too it would be actually painful to get all of it but. i could. #esp since adventuring is a lot easier now since i have my main team levelled to where they deal extra damage. #i think i need to work on a second ranger next? since im swapping out ram once fallen is fully levelled since he's got better movement #OH yeah definitely im swapping ram for fallen since i can get fallen's strength higher than ram's. yea thats my next goal

[cherryhaunting]

Twitter persona 4 discourse is still going so heres my only hot take:

mtf naoto.

#persona 4 #naoto shirogane #u Wanna hc them as transmasc or non-binary or cis or whatever idk thats cool too #i just think its a more interesting read (if I remember the story right) if she’s transfem #wanting to live her true self but feeling unable to transition to it because of like. workplace shit. bla bla usual story beats #but with a little bit of queer reading on top of it #also. on a personal level. its something I know I will struggle with as a genderqueer person in a scientific field so it makes the struggle #relatable to me #anyways uhh yeah . naoto is cool and I like her #discourse #p4

[fruitsyrups]

ive crossed over into an alternate dimension where side profiles are somehow sometimes easier to draw than other angles. bodies in side profile however... nooo thank you...

#ok the back of the head is hard but the facial features proportions kind of feel easier to figure out . maybe. #weird #n e way im happy with the way i draw faces mostly maybe 50 percent of the time but im so not caught up on drawing bodies #like to the point it just looks bizarre #decent proportional face with like at least some understanding of structure/form even if it's not much #and then the stiffest clunkiest body you ever did see #or i can go the other way around and have an ok body. like decently fluid / proportional. but no face #theres some kind of disconnect. cant have both at once #thats only a sometimes thing though anyways. faces are generally easier #tried to do a teeny bit of gesture drawing yesterday but i was feeling sooo lazy and impatient so only 3 of them turned out ok ish #im pretty sure i post more often talking about art than i actually post art #i dont post most of the things i draw #i like to have my little secrets... #secrets in question are just literally anything that isnt adventure time art #actually looking through my art folder is crazy cause like if i saw this 3 years ago (i was really bad at drawing 3 years ago) i would. idk #drop dead or something #but now its like yeah same old same old. lots of problems. need to work on those. #but its nice to step back and be like woagh holy shit. massive improvement #earlier i was trying to dfraw a character and it wasn't coming out right but instead of getting frustrated and discouraged #it was more like i had this feeling of . idk. excitement to get better at drawing? #i dont know if this is just a temporary mood or maybe im turning over a new leaf. new optimistic mindset about art #<- watch that 'new mindset' totally disappear when i have a slightly more prolonged period of art struggle. lol

[icewindandboringhorror]

I think the hardest thing in writing for me sometimes is the like “show don’t tell/let people communicate through subtext/Normal People don’t just walk around openly explaining their motivations for everything That’s Unnatural” thing because like.. I literally DO walk around openly explaining my motivations for everything, that is how I talk, I am an analytical detail oriented over-communicator who explains everything as thoroughly as possible and and will give a fully detailed 2 minute long answer to something simple like “how are you doing today?” .. like it’s hard to make things sound Natural and Normal when you yourself are inherently unnatural and abnormal in your methods of communication to an extent lol

#''hey. whats up? you look kind of sad.. is something wrong?'' normal answer (apparently how people are supposed to talk): *looks away #remosefully and stares into the distance* ''n-no.. I'm fine. don't worry about it.'' abnormal answer (how I would respond): ''Yeah I #'m mostly fine. I was just thinking about what the future is going to be like 30 years from now and if I'll ever actually accomplish anythin #g that I want to. which makes me feel X way for XYZ reason. you see because I had a dream last night that made me think of *continues to exp #lain my exact emotional state and inner thought process completely matter of factly in exact detail for 5 more minutes* #tfw you would be a badly written character if you existed in a story lol #This is also why I struggle making conflict because most conflicts can be resolved through conversation and I personally love to have long #detailed conversations about everything. Like literally I don't have hardly any conflicts interpersonally because if something happens it's #immediately followed up with like ''hey sorry if my tone of voice sounded a bit pointed or harsh. when you were talking to me I was trying #to balance all the stuff I was taking up the stairs and also my leg hurts so I think all my mental energy was being used there and I just #didn't feel like talking. I should have just said 'wait a minute and we can discuss it inside' instead of trying to end the conversation qui #ckly in a short rude way.' ''oh yeah thats fine. I thought it was something like that. sorry for hounding you about the topic as well. i #havent eaten in a while so I think I'm just a bit prickly at the moment. we should both rest for a while and destress from the store #trip and then talk about it later. maybe after lunch?' 'sure. sounds good.' like LITERALLY. lol #it is so hard for me to write characters who are bad communicators or don't understand their own internal states or arent constantly #analyzing their own actions to understand what they do/don't feel and why and what the cause of it is and etc. etc. etc. #I just naturally want everyone to perfectly undertsand everything and communicate amazingly and have complete self awareness and #logical presence of mind gjhbj.. which like.. of course comes across as unnatyural and also those type of people rarely ever get involved in #conflict and conflict is APPARENTLY what drives stories (even though I don't like most conflicts and just want to resolve them lol) so ...aa #I mean you can get around this to some degree by the fact that (at least in my opinion) no rule for dialogue is 100%. dialogue is good if it #sounds naturally like it comes from the character who said it. It can be meandering and pointless and rambly IF that matches the character. #it can be dry and overly self aware IF your character is that way and it suits them. So like throwing in a few detached scholar types or lik #e '5000 year old cave dwelling hermit' type people is good for me and works BUT the thing is an ENTIRE cast of characters can't be that way. #at some point - even in a setting where everyone is reserved and academic (like a research camp in the wilderness full of scholars and stuff #) still SOMEBODY has to be the one who's conflict prone and doesn't pristinely understand all of their emotions and etc. etc. Because statis #tically that is still literally the majority. Kind of like my tendency to make everyone 100% aromantic and asexul when it's like.. YES.. may #be 2 or 3 or even 4 out of 10 of them could be that way. but like.. an entire group? a diverse group of 10 people from all walks of life and #EVERY single one is like that??? hgjh . you have to add realistic variety #As much as I'm pro 'have more stories where sex or romance are literally NOT involved at all in any capacity since it's already oversaturate #d in media' I'm also dedicated to realism. alas. (at least as realistic as you can get in a fantasy setting lol)

[soopysoap]

hey btw nothing will make me immediately start ugly sobbing like the rocket man scene from everything sucks

#lord. LORDDD. #i also think its so interesting that while kates whole character is finding herself in the midst of Truly Dealing with her mothers death an #like. truly living for the first time with the fact that she doesnt have a mother during the years when she's developing as a person #her dads character has seemingly like #moved on #throughout the whole show #bc its established from the beginning that her death happened 10 years prior? so like it Makes Sense #and the entire time hes presented as this Happy Go Lucky guy who just wants to be there for his daughter and is a little silly and naive #sometimes #and like yeah hes struggling a bit when it comes to raising his daughter and finding love again but not any more than any other single #parent would! #and THEN #all of a sudden #he and kates boyfriend get her to play a song on the piano for them #bc they love her and want to see her in her element!!!! #and right from the beginning its established that the song shes going to play is very personal to her and her dad. they dont even divulge #details. he just says- 'youre gonna play moms song?' and she says 'yeah. is that okay?' and he says 'yeah.' and its fine #and then she plays and sings this BEAUTIFUL rendition of rocket man by elton john on the piano. and good GOD is he keeping it together for #her. but hes not smiling anymore!!!!! and the camera is cutting between her who is tearing up but Not Crying because she cant fucking cry b #SHE chose to do this and thats lame and embarrassing or whatever and then it fucking cuts back to him. during the lines 'i miss the earth s #much / i miss my wife' #good LORD nothing broke me faster #and then he just gets up. and leaves to go to the kitchen. during his daughters song- someone he has been TRYING SO HARD to be there for #while she continuously pushes him away bc of her own fears #and he fucking walks away bc he knows hes gonna break down and he cant do that in front of his daughter and who does he call?? WHO DOES HE #CALL????? the woman he had recently gone on a few dates with who likes him for Him who is helping him relearn what it means to be in love #and experience life without fear and she doesnt even pick up it just goes to voicemail and he KNOWS its just gonna go to voice mail her #voice just comforts him #all while rocket man is softly playing in the background #my roman empire

[josephslittledeputy]

Willa really goes from

“Shame.” She watches them for a second, watches the realization wash over their face. Their muffled yell gets cut short when she smashes the butt of the gun against their temple, sending them to the ground. She knows she should have pulled the trigger—it was them or her after all—but she just… couldn’t do it. What did that make her? Weak? A traitor? What would she do when it was them or her?

to

The sound of gunshots, screams, and curses echo behind her and there’s a twinge in her stomach. Guilt. She pushes it down, down, way down, until it’s nothing but a passing flutter. She can't look back and she sure as hell can never get caught. Not again. Not even if it meant throwing someone else under the bus to save her own ass.

Goes from not even killing peggies to throwing civs under the bus in order to buy a few minutes of time to escape

#tbd #dnrb #thats growth babyyy! #we're at chapter 4 and she still has a hard time but shes finally doing it folks! shes officially killin peggies.even if she frows up after #first passage is chapter 2 and second passage is somewhere between the middle and end of pt.1 of the dark au #just been writing away and ugh i really love that im getting to the better parts where willa's char is now changing #shes still herself but a bit more hardened now & this is only scratching the surface of the stuff im about to put her through >:) #struggling to participate in wip wednesdays and yet i can post shit like this... le sigh #eventually she'll have to slake the thirst of the beast inside her that craves the kill ahaaaa (not foreshadowing or anything) #except she defo still has a panic attack here or there i mean the girl isnt perfect 🤷🏻‍♀️ but by part 2... yeah she craves it

[cloudsrust]

How do you think helob and Sozo met?

So- They start to actually talk to one another once one of Sozo's followers ends up in one of Helob's traps. Until then they had just crossed paths, observing each others from afar just because of curiosity. The first time it happens they just discuss payment for the follower- the next times though (mushroomos.. aren't the brightest) they start chatting more- until the even get to share stories to one another, Sozo talks about his travels and the mushroom/rituals he discovered during them, while Helob describes how their daily hunts went. The excuse of the mushroomos soon isn't even needed anymore (even though Helob still catches one or two at times just to have an excuse to visit for an extra chat) and Sozo often stops by their shop when he decides to hunt for mushrooms on his own.

But why would they chat if they have practically nothing in common? Well Sozo just feels like a real chatterbox when he wants, especially when it's about mushrooms. Helob instead, at first does so out of curiosity for Sozo (it is important for a hunter to understand whether a new face is a prey or a predator)- but then they slowly start to appreciate this little work break.

-

I see Sozo as being an outsider, meaning he used to travel all over the place for his research. That at least until he discovered menticide mushroom and devoted his life and being to them, thus setting his definitive base in Spore Grotto. Helob instead was born and raised in the Lands of the Old Faith, more precisely in Silk Cradle. Yet they never really took part in the cult of Shamura, living by themselves and by their own beliefs, so they’re technically an outsider too fate wise. They're both alone in a way or another (wouldn't count mushroomos or the little spiders as real company, since they're technically afraid of both the research and the hunter)- which can become quite boring even for someone like Helob, who has been a lone hunter their whole life. So they're practically a little break from each other's routines in my head- just two fucked up predators keeping each other company ya know?

Imma also.. leave down here a little written bit that is kinda about it! (it's from Helob POV)

He had a weird presence to say the least, at times entertaining while others.. just curious. The thing that puzzled the spider the most was how neither his manners or scent matched with any ant they had ever met. And those occasional fresh splotches of blood on his fur and clothes..

Even with such doubts, Helob had never bothered to thoroughly investigate much about Sozo, simply chalking up most of his oddities to the spores that perpetually surrounded him. They didn't perceive him as a threat and he didn't seem to perceive them as prey, the rest they had no rush of knowing. Discovering everything about him straight away would've ruined a good chunk of the fun of their little chats after all.

The day the spider found one of his little guys stuck in one of their traps was when they actually started to talk to one another, instead of just sharing stares whenever one crossed the other's path. The first times they had just discussed payment for the followers' lives, then they had slowly started straining from the commercial path, slipping instead into a more casual chit chat. None of their interests really matched apart from perhaps hunting- one for meat, the other for.. well, mushrooms. Yet that dissonant chatting had quickly become a pleasant break from Helob’s usual routine. Stories of hunts that had gone for the best or the worst and detailed descriptions of rituals and mushrooms mixing together, taking the place of the daily slaughter that threatened to become a mere background noise for the spider.

#the cloud can speak oh boi #askbox #it's.. kinda of a boring answer I'm not gonna lie- and I dont know if I explained it right so thats why I left the written bit #there is technically more- especially once Helob discovers that Sozo is a spider like them #(Sozo pretends to be an ant to appear less threatening- and for some other reasons) #There is so much i would have to write tho- like how Sozo infected himself with the menticide #or how the mushroomo became his followers- #Oh and there would also have to be some bits about Helob's hunter code/beliefs to add in.. #there is so much but since I still have writer block I just cannot manage to write it down now;; #didn't think it would make struggle with asks also oughh- #....btw yeah I'm very normal about them yeah- yeah;;; ;w;

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

🪶

#not to be weird on main but jaysteph hallmarkesque fic where it's like. steph has been away at college #and comes back to gotham on holiday break absolutely jonesing to get back into ''the family business'' aka vigilantism #she and jason were childhood acquaintances (schoolbus theory!!!) and worked together a bit before she went to school #steph has an argument with tim about something stupid (no they're not dating at this point they're just besties and both a bit petty) #so they're at odds and the whole family is a bit tense bc there's a Big Case going on and B is away on JL business #(B has promised he'll be back in time for Christmas. he is SCRAMBLING to keep this promise.) #anyway: cue steph deciding to make things a little easier on dick by handling arrangements for The Christmas Eve Gala TM #and recruiting jason (who is honestly just along for the ride/lowkey keeps mom-friending literally everyone in the absense of bruce) #they end up doing Shenanigans while trying to pull this event off and not cause any more trouble for alfred #while also working that Big Case during the nighttime and dealing with regular Family Tensions. #steph is also conflicted about transfering back to gotham u or staying with her current program that isn't really doing it for her #(jason is also considering enrolling in college now that he's legally alive again and is struggling a little with Being Alive) #at some point they end up reminiscing about their shenanigans as kids who rode the same schoolbus #and there's this really emotional moment like ''sometimes i wonder why I'm even allowed to be alive. why did we get to come back'' #and all that. steph has a mild existential crisis brought on by emotions running high and sleep deprivation #thats basically her asking how she's able to go to college. she should have brain damage after being technically dead for minutes like that #and jason is like ''i DID have brain damage'' and they just look at each other and it's like this *zing* moment #like hotel transylvania skkdfnskfnsk #anyway yeah college girl steph home for the holidays falling for the guy she used to sit with on the bus??? i am Thinking #also samsung needs to give me a starling emoji smh

[cacaitos]

gendered uniforms for schools that are otherwise mixed are dumb as fuck i hope they cease to exist forever.

#txt #like if it's a private catholic school for ex you wouldnt say much not bc it's not uselessly arbitrary but bc you already know facefron #that they possess a certain agenda/ideology. that i struggle to find natural in the public education sphere. if it even pretends to #hinge on secularism. and well modern uniform do default automatically to pants and even then way those uniforms are gendered #does not serve the realities of the dominican adolescent. in their proportions and material quality i mean. #like yeah thats a problem w casual clothes too but the way it applies to shit ppl have to wear 8 hours 5 days a week its a bit silly #like the problem in it of itself isnt on skirt being a choice it's that it's obligatory for arbutrary reasons

[random-cat]

💧random angst headcanon for Ace :3

In his canon story his nightmares start off as just memories of his childhood but slowly changes to make up scenarios where he fails his team and it causes him to bottle up his emotions more and hide away from the people who truly care for him. They start after he gets his ass whooped for the first time. Since he is the only human he does realize that he is a liability. And it scares him. He just jokes it off with the others tho.

This is subjected to change as the story processes more

#i never really ever rp with him like that and thats a shame #hes suppossed to represent a lot of bad habits of mine and i fail to follow throught that often #well you guys know he breaks up with his partners because he doesnt feel worthy enough #but in his story the first time he gets his ass whooped he contemplates up and leaving #because he feels like just a hassle #they drag his ass back tho and that starts his slow journey on accepting that he'll feel like that for awhile but just bottling it up #will hurt him more #and he slowly starts telling them about his struggles and they all show him healthier coping mechanism #but yeah. ace in the beginning sucks at really expressing when hes sad #because why do that when he can just he silly and flirt or do something dumb to make others laugh #i have so much of my own healing journey stored in him but not much of my personality lol #also i only every had nightmares of zombies #ace is just a very exaggerated vessel of what i went thru #i do also feel like a lot about him is a bit cringe #but who cares of your having fun