This isn’t Johnny discourse but it is kind of discourse about the discourse about him balding (which he isn’t).
What would it matter if he took off his hat and he was a shining beacon?? The dude canonically fucks (well not canon-canon but I feel like there’s implications of fucks-ing)!! At the most, he would be a Pitbull reference and that would be cool because good for Daisuke. Listen to Timber by Ke$ha (feat. Pitbull).
It kind of felt like they were making jokes at the expense of people loosing hair. It’s like that thing where you shouldn’t make fun of people for ‘X’ because then your friends who ‘X’ will know you think that about them.
John E is cool. I think he’s lame but he’s cool.
-A concerned Jellyfish Pirate
Idk anything about Pitbull, to be honest, but my GOD does he look like he's having the time of his life in the Timber video hahah Been a while since I heard that song...
Anyway, Johnny totally fucks. There's no way a man that toned, running around shirtless all of the time, with that slight yeehaw accent, couldn't find someone DTF with the tiniest bit of effort. He's absolutely gettin it rofl He could still get it if he was bald too, or receding.
I've complained about it on here a bit already, but yeah I don't think people making fun of Johnny because they think he's losing hair realize that a lot of people in real life are going to lose their hair as they age, and their jokes at Johnny are also jokes at these people. It's not even just an issue cis men can have either, everyone's hair thins with age, some just more (and sooner) than others. To make fun of someone, fictional or otherwise, for losing their hair is digging a trench to fill with future self loathing at one's own hair loss. And hair loss in >2023 isn't even that bad anymore!! There are so many ways to manage and style it now.
Johnny's a babe. Big fan of his "dad trying too hard to be cool but is actually somehow still really cool despite that" energy
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I will say, though, people used to be way meaner about fic online when I was a kid. Readers can still be shitty, don't get me wrong, but it was the wild fucking west when I was young and new to fandom.
Sporking communities (communities dedicated to going through fic line-by-line to make fun of it to an audience), homophobic death threats, "constructive criticism" that was really just designed to hurt young writers' feelings... Like this was all considered not just acceptable but fun and fairly normalized. You were considered "butthurt" if this stuff really affected you.
But damn, it was so mean. Like so unnecessarily mean. People were practically hunting fan writers for sport just because they wrote fic/meta/roleplays/etc. that they didn't enjoy. I cannot overemphasize that making fun of writers was considered a viable fandom path at a certain point. Some people got very big followings for sporkings, takedowns, particularly creative flames, etc.
What I'm telling you is that making fun of others' writing was considered a kind of fanwork in and of itself.
Like... I remember writing something online when I was about fourteen and -- I don't even remember what it was, being honest with you. It probably wasn't very good, given my age. But I do remember that someone just replied to it with a link for a website "how to write" and nothing else, and it hurt my feelings so badly that I didn't even want to keep going. That was considered concrit back then, even though it was really just a thinly veiled insult. Pretty sure whoever wrote that comment thought it was hilarious, and others would have agreed with them. I definitely would've been mocked if I'd complained.
And... that was just what you had to put up with if you posted your writing publicly. Some of those old warnings like "flames will be used to make s'mores!" come off as kind of cringe these days, but it really was a coping mechanism that you had to develop if you wanted to get through it at all. It was saying "your words won't hurt me, so don't bother."
Like... I like to believe that I'm a pretty good writer these days, and I can guarantee that not one of those assholes who made fun of me or mocked my work or talked shit about my ideas actually helped to make me what I am today. It was the people who encouraged me to play with a lot of different ideas and forms of writing who really helped me grow. Nothing worked better than just writing and writing and writing without fear that I would be punished for doing so.
So even if you're a garbage person who likes to hurt people because it makes you feel big and strong and important, think about all this pragmatically. Be totally fucking selfish for a minute. Think about all of the good writing you will never, ever get to read if you destroy the writer's self-esteem when they're still learning. Think about all the people who will never grow. All the beautiful flowers that are being nipped in the bud every day by assholes like you.
And even if someone never gets good, even if they just splash around in stupid ideas and awful prose and incoherent characterization... so fucking what? No one owes you beauty. Sometimes the beauty is just in having fun with what you're doing, and sometimes that's enough.
I am actually extremely relieved that fandom isn't quite as cruel as it was when I was a kid, but I won't pretend that things are perfect now. People still have this weird entitlement to them, like other people in fandom only exist to create things that they enjoy. Like other people only have worth, only matter, if their presence gives you exactly what you want when you want it.
You don't have to like everything that other people make! You don't even have to like them. But come on, now. Let people have fun. And don't act like other people's fun is only valid if it's of use to you.
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One line any fic! Rules: pick ten of your fics, scroll to somewhere midpoint, pick a line chunk and share it, and then tag ten people.
I was tagged a while back by @glorious-spoon. Thanks!! I feel like I’ve talked about my 2022 fic a lot so I’m going to make an effort to include some much older fic too!
1. Solicited Noods (Leverage, 2017)
Beneath her, Quinn was opening the suitcase and showing its contents to the gang leader. Even from this high up Parker recognized the stack of papers as being identical to the labels on Peggy’s contraband jams. She was begrudgingly impressed. Drugs hidden in the adhesive. Easy to transport. Easy to hide in plain sight.
Peggy’s voice broke into her reverie. “I know, but at least yesterday I could pretend he wasn’t working with the people who tried to kill me. My cats and I are going to die single and alone,” she lamented.
2. your name whispered on the wind (The King’s Avatar, 2020)
Huang Shaotian gives up on the notebooks and stands. He’s paler than usual, a smudge of dark circles bruising the thin skin under his eyes. Or perhaps it’s just the overhead light, projecting Yu Wenzhou’s concerns onto the canvas of his face. Even his shirt is muted, a dark blue instead of his usual bright yellows and greens.
3. The Man in That One Suit (Person of Interest/What Not To Wear, 2013)
“Now he, on the other hand.” The co-host, Stacy, chimed in, walking over to Finch and appraising him from head to toe.
“A study in perfection,” Clinton agreed, a finger lightly tapping his lip in appreciation.
4. the shifting shapes of clouds (Shadowhunters, 2020)
Lorenzo’s gasp is poorly hidden and Magnus amuses himself in the growing silence by imagining the scandalized look that must be scrawled across Lorenzo’s face. He keeps his back turned and his magic ready. It’s both a test and a challenge.
Surprisingly enough, Lorenzo passes on both counts. “It’s probably for the best that I did not know that about you when I first came to New York.” Try as he might, Lorenzo can’t entirely hide the shake in his voice.
5. #work hard nap hard (The King’s Avatar, 2021)
Jokes aside, the napping pics have been heating up and we’re here to round up what’s fact and what’s fiction about Blue Rain’s afternoon delights.
Fact: The team really does keep a collection of “napping blankets” on hand. Their blanket cherry was popped by their very own Zheng Xuan. Bonus fact: Team Captain Yu Wenzhou is most frequently seen napping with the very same blue blanket that took his team’s innocence.
Yeah, we all wish we were that blanket
Fiction: Blue Rain team orgies. Sorry tanks, healers, and DPS dealers, but that rumor is Busted! Our correspondent onsite confirms only good wholesome fun is to be found with these boys.
6. strange partnership (Shadowhunters, 2019)
“I suppose it wouldn’t be fair to keep you here, but I can’t take you back either.” A sense of dread settles over Alec. If this man takes him captive, there’s not much he can do. Hodge had taken Alec’s cutlass and his pistol before pushing him overboard. He doesn’t even have the set of thin metal rods that have gotten him out locked rooms before.
He swallows around the tentacle in his mouth, his throat suddenly dry.
7. flicker (The King’s Avatar, 2022)
Yu Wenzhou tries not to think about how many versions of himself have fallen to this creature. “I can say no.” He’s figured this much out already. If he has to guess, he’d say it needs his permission to cross over into his stream. “You waited too long. You’ll die if I do.”
The lights flicker, faster this time. Yu Wenzhou doubles over, the taste of blood in his mouth.
‘I’ll take you with me.’ The voice sears into his head, splitting his brain apart.
8. Condiment War (Hetalia/Highlander, 2013)
Eyes narrowing in suspicion, Prussia cocked his head in thought. Back in the days when he led armies into battle, he would have traded entire divisions for a mind like Pierson's. "You're damn good at this, for a linguistics nerd."
Pierson gave an abashed smile. "A lot of the documents saved for posterity are old military correspondence. Guess I picked up a few additional talents in the translation process. Oh, also receipts. I can discuss archaic trading practices at length, if you'd prefer." His brow furrowed in mock contemplation. "There were a suspicious amount of goats changing hands."
9. Means of Transportation (The King’s Avatar, 2021-2022)
“I’m fine, why wouldn’t I be fine. It’s Wenzhou who has the problem, not me. Nothing bad happened to me, which you would have known if you came to our conference.” The phone suddenly feels red hot in his hand and he’s tempted to end the call.
“You’ve always been a shitty liar.”
“Your face is shitty.”
“You’ll be lucky to look this good when you’re my age.”
The laugh dies in Huang Shaotian’s throat, leaving behind a tight ache. “I miss him.” The words slip out in a whisper. What did he do wrong that all his captains keep leaving him?
10. This is not a ghost story (The King’s Avatar, 2022)
"Have you ever heard of a kid named Huang Shaotian?"
Wei Chen’s face, normally etched in a perpetual scowl, falls. He pivots in his chair to give Yu Wenzhou his full attention. "Where'd you hear that name?"
tagging: @faejilly, @shadaras, @forerussake, @saxifactumterritum, @prince-of-elsinore, @gingersnapwolves, @geniuskaktus, @humanformdragon, @carmenlire, @bytheangell
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