#s.coups angst

[fantasyescapes17]

Patience (Part 1)

An elaborate charade- that is what your life has been for these past few years, and it has taken the help of more than one person to balance your delicate lies and secrets. Now entering your final season as an eligible young lady seeking wedded bliss, will you be able to keep up the act in order to achieve your dreams?

Genre: Choi Seungcheol x female!reader. Regency!AU (It's sort of Bridgerton-esque in the sense that I give zero attention to historical accuracy and prioritize aesthetics lmao) You are Jeonghan's sister so your last name is Yoon, but the reader has no other specific characteristics, physical or otherwise.

Word Count: 4.1k+

Part 2

Series Masterlist

"I'm afraid the upcoming season will be Miss Yoon's final opportunity to secure herself a decent husband," the obnoxious woman remarked. 

She did not seem embarrassed that the subject of her gossip (i.e, you) sat immediately across from her in the lavish parlour and well within earshot. She looked straight at you and silently dared you to respond to her callous comment. 

You did not indulge her. You merely sipped your tea. 

"Oh, surely not," her friend replied with a hint of embarrassment. "You mustn't say that, Mrs. Patty! Miss Yoon still has plenty of time before we can write her off as an old maid. She should be perfectly eligible for another two or three seasons, I dare say."

"She might have been, if not for that darling younger sister of hers. I believe little Miss Mina is eighteen now, and will be making her debut in society next season. Am I correct, Miss Yoon?" Mrs. Patty demanded of you. 

You couldn't ignore a question addressed directly to you. You placed your teacup on the table and nodded reluctantly. 

"Yes, Mother believes that my sister should be ready to debut next year," you replied softly. 

Miss Patty looked triumphant. "Well! There you have it! Anyone who has laid eyes on Miss Mina knows that she is the loveliest little creature and I am sure her paltry dowry will not prevent an eligible man from proposing to her. Miss Mina will be snatched up  instantly- and then what shall happen to our dear Miss Yoon? With her younger sister married before her, she won't have a chance!"

The other woman frowned. "Indeed, Miss Mina is uncommonly beautiful. She will have her pick of eligible men."

You rose from your seat abruptly. "Pardon me, ladies. I shall call for some more tea and cakes- we seem to be running short."

You exited the parlour before they had a chance to object, and cursed your mother for leaving you alone to handle the guests. Mother should have known that these infuriating women would show up the instant they heard that the Yoons had arrived in London for the season.

You turned towards the kitchens, hoping that the maids would not offer to help and make your journey redundant. Luckily, the servants were busy unpacking and carrying in your family's belongings. It had been a long journey from the countryside to your London abode- but a necessary one. The Yoon family could not absent themselves from the London season when they had two eligible members of marriageable age.

You turned the corner of the main hallway and came face to face with the other eligible Yoon. Your half-brother, Jeonghan. 

"Jeonghan!" you called out to him hopefully. "Are you going out? Will you take me with you?"

Jeonghan was in the process of lacing up his riding gear and stood to greet you. As your father's only son from his first marriage, Jeonghan became the heir to the entire Yoon estate upon your father's passing. 

"I'm afraid not, sister- I am going out riding with the Lees. You would be required to bring a chaperone," he replied slyly, reminding you, quite unnecessarily, that you could not be seen in public in the company of other single men without a female chaperone present. 

You sighed. "All right- but could you stop by the parlour room before you leave?"

"Why? So that Mrs. Patty may set up a meeting for me with her third niece? There are many things I would do for you, dear sister, but subjecting myself to Mrs. Patty is not among them," Jeonghan replied calmly as he continued to tie the straps of his riding gear. "I am sacrificing plenty for you already. I shall have my hands full at the Grisham's ball tomorrow."

You blinked. "What will happen at the Grisham's ball?"

"I have heard that a certain Mr. Hessington has expressed an interest in you. We shall have to take precautions to ensure he does not find the opportunity to express this interest in front of your mother."

"Oh dear. What does Hessington want?" you despaired. 

Jeonghan smirked. "He wants marriage. They all do. That is the purpose of this elaborate charade of having a season and attending all these social events, is it not? To find a suitable partner in  marriage?"

"Jeonghan, there is only one season left," you reminded him miserably. You reached for your brother's arm. "You must make sure nobody proposes to me this season. From next year everyone will focus on Mina and I will be forgotten- and once she is married then my prospects will be entirely extinguished. You must ensure nothing comes in the way of this."

Jeonghan sighed. "You must be the only woman in London who is actively trying to make herself less eligible for marriage."

"And I have been doing a wonderful job so far. Mrs. Patty said herself that I'm as good as an old maid next season if Mina gets engaged before me. And she surely will be. After that, they'll throw me aside with the old maids and governesses and widows."

"Six months more?"

You nodded eagerly. "Six months more. I will be in your debt forever, Jeonghan."

He sighed. "You certainly shall be. I've become nothing short of a villain in my step-mother's eyes since you persuaded me to tell her that I had reduced your dowry. She has most of the ton convinced that I am an evil brother stealing his sisters' rightful inheritance."

"But we had to do that. A large dowry would make me attractive to men looking to marry for a fortune," you reminded him. 

Jeonghan sighed. "I know. All the same, I've set aside your money. You and Mina will have your dowries once this charade is over. All of the dowry, I mean, not the paltry amount I told your mother you would receive."

You shook your head with a smile. 

"I don't need it."

"Don't refuse money when it's offered to you, good god, woman, have you lost your senses?" Jeonghan said lightly. He placed his hands on his hips and smiled back at you. "You seem more cheerful  than usual."

"We're almost at the end of this charade. Six more months," you replied excitedly. 

"Well, do try to look less cheerful. For all the ton knows, you're a woman with little dowry, no prospects, a prettier younger sister, and getting on in age. People will begin to wonder what you have to be so happy about."

You smiled to yourself. 

You had plenty to be happy about. And Mrs. Patty and the rest of the ton could choke on their tea and biscuits- they would never find out.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Your mother maintained a tight grip on your arm as she steered you around the corners of the large ballroom on the Grisham's summer estate. 

Your arm was beginning to feel numb.

"Now," your mother said firmly. "Don't you be discouraged by what Mrs. Patty says. You're a young woman of good breeding and though you're not nearly as charming as Mina, there's nothing wrong with you. Lesser women than you have secured wealthy husbands, do you understand?'

You resisted the urge to sigh. "Yes, mother."

"But you mustn't become lax about this. You need to consider what might happen to us if … if that boy Jeonghan decides to cast us out. You and your sister must marry well before that happens."

You turned to your mother in surprise. "Mother! Jeonghan would never do such a thing!"

Your mother had very little love for her stepson and she was not shy about admitting it. "Well, he's already stolen half your dowries, there's no knowing what he'll do next. We may be on the streets soon. Even sooner, if he decides to marry and his new wife decides to be rid of us. Your marriage is important."

You sighed. "Yes, mother."

"Now put on a smile and look a little more graceful."

You took a deep breath and straightened your shoulders. It was a delicate line you walked in social events such as these. You had to look dignified and well-mannered enough to satisfy your mother, but not so captivating that you captured the attention of any potential suitors. It only got easier with time. You were older and consequently less attractive than the young girls in the room, and the ton would certainly have heard the news of your reduced dowry. 

You tried not to make eye contact with any men as you quietly moved through the crowd like a wallflower. You were suddenly and abruptly met by a very tall man that appeared before you. 

"Miss Yoon. May I have the pleasure of the next dance?"

You breathed a sigh of relief as you recognised the man. He had a mischievous smile on his face. "Mr. Kim! Oh thank heavens, I was worried that it was an actual suitor."

Mr. Kim Mingyu had the decency to look offended as he took your hand and swept you skillfully towards the dance floor for a lively waltz. 

"Do you think that we would allow an actual suitor within ten feet of you? We've been doing this for three years now, Miss Yoon. We're professionals now, I dare say. There's one of us stationed in each section of the room and we are ready to intervene in case any man shows the slightest bit of  interest towards you."

You laughed. "Well, don't I feel well-protected."

"You are."

"I'm very sorry that you all have to spend your social gatherings watching out for me in this manner. Hopefully, this is the last season that this will be required," you apologised honestly. 

"Nonsense. I rather enjoy it," Mingyu chuckled. 

You shook your head. "I don't believe you. Surely you would rather save your dances for a woman in whom you have a genuine interest? I notice that the young lady in cerulean blue over there cannot keep her eyes away from us."

Mingyu cleared his throat and took a quick peek in the direction you nodded your head. "Ah. Well, that can't be helped. She's better off without me in any case, I've garnered a reputation as a rake. Dancing with me would only tarnish her prospects."

You raised an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

"Yes," he replied simply. 

"I suppose I cannot argue- being in the unique position of not caring about my own prospects makes me a poor judge. May I ask what you have done to have yourself labelled as a rake by the ton?" you enquired. 

Mingyu smiled. "Other than being naturally charming, rich and handsome?"

"I'm afraid those qualities make for an eligible bachelor, Mr. Kim, not a rake."

Mingyu merely chuckled without offering further explanation as the dance came to an end. He gracefully led you off to the side, where you were drawn into a conversation with some other co-conspirators- namely Mr. Lee Seokmin and Mr. Kwon Soonyoung. 

"Miss Yoon," was the cheerful greeting you received from a grinning Mr. Kwon. "I hope your quest to prevent all offers of matrimony fares well? I am pleased to report that the ton seems to be losing interest in you."

You smiled gratefully. "You bring glad tidings, Mr. Kwon. But I heard that Mr. Hessington…."

"Mr. Hessington is being informed of your reduced dowry and impending state of poverty at this very moment," Mr. Lee Seokmin reassured you. His eyes subtly darted towards the other end of the ballroom where your half-brother was in the middle of a conversation with Mr. Hessington himself. You could not hear what was being spoken, but there was no mistaking Mr. Hessington's alarmed expression at whatever Jeonghan said to him.  

"Delightful," you replied. 

"We have further pleasant tidings for you," Mr. Kwon continued. His hand slid into his waistcoat and he cast a furtive glance around before withdrawing something and slipping it surreptitiously into your hands. You tucked it away into the folds of your gown hastily- but not before ascertaining that it was a small envelope. 

Your eyes brightened in anticipation. "Could it be…"

"Indeed," Mr. Kwon replied with a large smile. "I was able to stop by a certain estate that shall remain unnamed on my way to London, and catch up with a dear friend of ours. He bid me to deliver a letter by hand that he dared not risk sending by post, lest it be intercepted by unwelcome parties. It will be safe, I trust, in your possession?” 

You couldn’t hold back your smile. “Very safe, indeed.”

“I certainly hope so, because your mother approaches us and she looks rather red in the face.”

Your plans to sneak away to a quiet corner and read your letter were thwarted instantly by the approach of your mother. She was flushed and huffing, although she attempted to calm herself when she noticed that you were in the company of Mr. Kwon and Mr. Lee- while they were not the most eligible bachelors in the room, they were eligible and rich enough for your mother to greet them with her politest smile.  

“Mr. Kwon, Mr. Lee. What a pleasure to see you in London,” she tittered.  “I do hope you will find the time to call on us for tea later this week."

They both greeted her politely and accepted her invitation with the usual graces, before your mother took hold of your arm and steered you away from them. 

"Is everything all right, mother?" you asked, concerned. 

"All right? I have just heard- the most terrible news- Mr. Hessington had expressed an interest in courting you but that odious brother of yours has gone and told him about your dowry! I have half a mind to expose that conniving little man for what he is- a thief, a monster-"

"Mother, you must calm down," you insisted gently. "There must be some misunderstanding-"

Your mother was distraught. "Oh, what shall we do? If you are not married this season- we shall be left on the streets unless Mina marries exceedingly well but if that boy Jeonghan continues to ruin her prospects as well-"

"Nobody could ruin Mina's prospects. She is the sweetest, prettiest creature and you know everyone will fall in love with her when she comes into society. Perhaps we should accept that my time is coming to an end, mother…."

"No! No, you cannot give up, my dear. We shall find you a husband this season!"

You sighed. "Yes, mother-"

"Go, go back to Mr. Kwon and Mr. Lee- perhaps one of them will ask you to dance, they seem like nice young gentlemen and the evening is not yet over…"

You extricated yourself from your mother- but instead of returning to company, you slid along the length of the ballroom until you succeeded in finding a remote and private corner behind a table of refreshments and some heavy curtains. You eagerly pulled out the small envelope Soonyoung had given you and unfolded its contents as your heart swelled in anticipation. 

My love,

It has been too long since we last spoke. I hope you and your family are well. Although I have met your brother a few times this year and heard news of you from him, it saddens me that you must always be so far away from me. 

I will be travelling to London on business next week- I may not be able to stay the entire season, as you know well, but may I be so bold as to ask for a glimpse of your beautiful smile while I am in the city? I would be honoured if you would grant me a dance at Almack's on Thursday night. But do not put yourself to trouble, my love- if the thought of meeting me in public makes you uneasy or if your feelings for me have changed during our separation, know that I would never resent you. I desire nothing more than your happiness and well-being. 

Forever yours

S. 

Your heart danced wildly as you tucked the contents back into the folds of your dress. It had been too long since you had received a letter from Seungcheol- a few close calls with your nosy mother intercepting your mail had made it too dangerous for him to write to you by normal post. 

But to finally see him again after so many months apart! And on Thursday, so soon! You had to turn your face to the wall to hide your giddy smile. Three years of a secret, clandestine courtship had not diminished your adoration of the man in the slightest. You still felt as strongly for Mr. Choi Seungcheol as you had the very first time he smiled at you with his bright smile and took your hand in his gentle grasp for your very first dance, so many years ago. 

You took a moment to compose yourself (it would not be appropriate to be seen looking so giddy) and slipped out of your corner. Your brother had been poking around at the refreshment table and he approached you when he saw you- Jeonghan's expression was grim. 

"I think I shall avoid dining at home for the time being," Jeonghan told you drily. "I fear my step-mother may really intend to poison me for what I have done tonight."

You sighed. You were not ignorant of how much Jeonghan had sacrificed for your sake. "I am sorry for the trouble I have put you through because of all this, Jeonghan. I will try to calm my mother."

His eyes softened. "I don't require an apology from you, sister."

"Gratitude, then?" you offered gently. 

"If you could keep your mother away from any sharp objects or poisonous substances, that should be sufficient recompense for now," he replied with a chuckle. "So. I heard from Mr. Kwon that a certain Mr. Choi will be in London in a few days."

You bit back a smile. "Yes."

Jeonghan patted you on the arm gently. "I am glad you will have a chance to see him. Perhaps we can arrange to have your mother occupied elsewhere for the evening…"

You shook your head. "I will handle mother myself, Jeonghan," you reassured him. "You have done plenty. "

Jeonghan looked contemplative for a moment. "I sincerely hope you and Seungcheol can be happy together soon, sister. I would not have put my own reputation at stake if I did not hold his character- and yours-  in the highest regard."

You smiled. A genuine compliment from Jeonghan was rare, and that made it all the more precious. You squeezed his hand on your arm. 

"Thank you, brother."

"Now- let us walk away quickly. I see Mrs. Patty approaches and she has that idiotic niece of hers right behind her…"

—----------------------------------------------------

The days trickled past slowly and painfully until Thursday evening finally arrived. Through your own clever manipulations, you had persuaded your mother to attend a card party being held by Mrs. Patty and to allow you to attend Almack's alone chaperoned by Viscountess Hong- one of the few married young women that your mother could be persuaded to entrust you with. 

"I hope, Viscountess, that you will recommend my daughter to some of your acquaintances," your mother pressed. "You have done so well for yourself. I hope you can be a positive influence on her."

Viscountess Hong smiled. She had not been married long; her husband, Viscount Joshua Hong, had been renowned as one of the most eligible bachelors in London not long ago. It did not come as a surprise to anyone when their marriage was announced in the papers, however. The gossip-minded members of the ton had long known that Viscount Hong was smitten with a young lady of humble origins. 

Your mother admired any woman who could achieve the difficult task of marrying above her station. 

"I will be a responsible and careful chaperone, Mrs. Yoon. You may rest assured that I will take excellent care of your daughter for the evening," the Viscountess promised. 

Your mother waved you off and you could not help the butterflies that erupted in your stomach as you climbed into the Hongs' carriage. Viscount Hong was waiting outside and greeted you in his usual kind and pleasant manner. 

You thanked him nervously. "I'm very grateful for your invitation. I was worried that my mother would not be persuaded to let me visit Almack’s tonight without a female  chaperone."

Viscountess Hong took your hand warmly. "Of course, we would never allow that! I’ve had the pleasure of seeing Seungcheol often this past year, and the man never smiles quite as brightly as when someone mentions your name. I'm afraid the man is quite devoted to you, Miss Yoon."

You felt shy, and bit your lip. "I-I do care for him a great deal."

Viscountess Hong beamed.

It was a pleasant carriage ride to Almack's- the Hongs kept you engaged in conversation and their friendly presence helped calm your nerves. As Viscountess Hong told you about the day she first met her husband, your mind drifted back to your own fateful introduction to Mr. Choi Seungcheol four years ago. 

—------------------------------------

The estate was magnificent. 

"Oh! A marble fountain! It is so beautiful!" your younger sister Mina cried out in delight at the sight of the immaculate gardens and the enormous white fountain that towered in the centre, gently spouting water. 

Your mother (despite being notoriously difficult to impress) also looked at the enormous estate and manor appreciatively. "Indeed, this estate is quite lovely. Perhaps we should plant some flowers like those back home. You say this manor belongs to Mr. Choi?" she asked your brother. 

Jeonghan nodded. "Yes- Mr. Choi Seungcheol was a close friend of mine at Oxford. His father passed away two years ago and he inherited the estate. He was more than happy to invite us all to stay at the manor while I take care of some business here in Derbyshire.  The weather is lovely here this time of year."

"Very generous," your mother remarked thoughtfully as a servant unloaded the marriage behind you. "And… is there a Mrs. Choi?"

Jeonghan smiled tightly. "There was. she passed away in childbirth four years ago."

"He is a widower, then. And has a child," your mother remarked, displeased. 

Jeonghan nodded. "Yes."

"Pity," your mother whispered to you, as she took your arm and walked towards the manor out of Jeonghan's earshot. "I was almost beginning to imagine you being mistress of this lovely estate. But you may find a way to have a marble fountain without having to marry a widower."

You blinked at your mother in surprise. It was no secret that she had not been your father's first wife. 

"But you married a widower," you said, surprised. 

Your mother shot you a sharp look. 

"Exactly, my dear."

Before you could question her further on this hypocritical viewpoint, the entrance to the manor burst open. Servants emerged to unload your carriage and carry your things inside. They were followed by a tall, well-dressed man with a handsome smile that you barely managed to glimpse before your view was blocked by your brother stepping into your path. 

“Seungcheol!” 

The two men shook hands warmly, and you could see from Jeonghan’s unusually relaxed manner that he carried a great deal of affection and trust for Mr. Choi. They exchanged greetings for a moment, before Jeonghan finally stepped aside and allowed you to feast your eyes on Mr. Choi properly. 

“Seungcheol- allow me to introduce you to my family. My father’s wife, Mrs. Yoon- and my two sisters, Miss Yoon and Miss Mina.” 

You curtsied without taking your eyes off the startlingly handsome man. Seungcheol bowed politely in return. His manner was calm and suited a respectable and confident man- but there was something in his large eyes that sparkled with liveliness and joy. You had seen handsome men before- Jeonghan often had friends over for dinner and you had spent time in society. 

But no man had ever made you feel quite so giddy. 

“We are very grateful for your hospitality, Mr. Choi,” your mother said performatively. “Your estate is lovely. My daughters and I were just discussing how delightful that marble fountain is.” 

Seungcheol smiled and glanced at the fountain. “Ah- yes, that was my own personal selection. I am rather fond of it myself. And allow me to say, madam, that it is a pleasure to be host to you and your lovely daughters. Your arrival has been long-awaited- not only by myself but by certain other members of my household.” 

It was only then that you finally tore your eyes away from Mr. Choi’s smile and noticed that another person stood behind him. A small, dark-haired boy of no more than four years old with the same bright eyes as Mr. Choi was clinging shyly to his father’s legs. 

“Allow me to introduce my son- Jiwoo.” 

-------------------------

A/N: So this is my first time posting for Seventeen! I used to have a moderately successful fanfiction blog for a different kpop group on here a few years ago but I took a break and just wanted to start afresh since Seventeen is the only group I keep up with these days, and I miss writing.

I mostly plan to write some fantasy AUs over the next couple months (got some more regency, royal and other fantasy ideas brewing) so we'll see how it goes.

#seventeen fanfiction #seungcheol fluff #seventeen scenario #seungcheol angst #seventeen fluff #seventeen angst #svt #svt imagines #regency!au #historical!au #seungcheol x reader #seungcheol fanfiction #seventeen scenarios #s.coups #s.coups fluff #s.coups angst #s.coups fanfiction

[cheolism]

towards the sun

✧ choi seungcheol x reader

✧ summary: sometimes you wonder if seungcheol will one day regret being tied to you.

✧ wc is approx 2k

✧ warnings/tags: angst and comfort, insecurities. mentions of depression, anxiety. seungcheol talking abt his own struggles with depression. quiet anger, crying. seungcheol loves you sm and spoils you accordingly. childhood sweethearts, promise rings. you two worship each other <3 tons of metaphors.

✧ request: if you have the time can i please request for an argument drabble with cheolli? please make it angst with a fluffy fluff ending:))))))

✧ i hope you like this, anon!!! i couldn't fit in fluff at the end, but it's comfort and sweet. i know you asked for a drabble, but it sort of?? ran away from me?? i hope you enjoy nonetheless!!! <3

All night you had sat near the wall, watching your boyfriend socialize. Seungcheol was constantly moving, face bright as he talked to longtime friends and new ones, family members hugging him and congratulating him. 

 You drank your water steadily, trying to get that bitter taste out of your mouth. It had persisted ever since Seungcheol came home, brilliant and bright and shining. He was like a light amongst the crowd, a star amongst the ordinary. 

And you were part of that ordinary. 

He had risen so high. Seungcheol had flown towards the sun, fearless and accomplished. He hadn’t meant to leave you, hadn’t meant to leave you on the ground, but that’s where you stood; watching him fly away, stranded. 

When Seungcheol finally returned to your side, he pressed a kiss to your cheek. You couldn’t help but lean into him, despite all the thoughts that poisoned your mind and heart. He wrapped an arm around you, pressing you to his side. He was warm, as Seungcheol always was, warm from the heat of the sun and the satisfaction of flying so close to it. 

“I’m thinking we should head out,” he murmured, voice deep in your ear. He brought his other hand, the one not hugging your waist, up and brushed your hair from your face. Seungcheol’s eyes were sweet as they looked at you, soft with his adoration of you. “Don’t you think so, baby? It’s getting late.”

“Don’t you want to talk a bit more?” You asked, glancing about the room. People were still arriving, taking off their coats and scarves, cheeks aglow with the bite of winter. “You haven’t seen some of these people in forever.”

Seungcheol shrugged, humming as his finger traced the curve of your cheek. “I’ve always thought that if someone really wants to see you, they’d make an effort. You know more than half of these people don’t really care about me.”

You frowned at him, hating the thought. You found it hard for anyone to not care about him, not when his heart was so large and welcoming, when he was Choi Seungcheol. You loved him with every fiber of your being, loved him even when he flew to the sun and your feet remained on the ground, so how was it anyone had the ability to feel otherwise about him? 

Seungcheol laughed softly at your incredulous look. “Come on, baby. Let’s get some soju from the convenience store, some ramen. We can drive out of Seoul, look at the stars.”

Leaving the event was tricky. Even as he was helping you into your coat, even as he slid your fingers into your gloves and made sure they weren’t bunched awkwardly, people were stopping him. They glowed just from speaking to him, as if his stardom was enough to ignite them. 

Eventually the two of you made it out to the car, a sleek black thing that Seungcheol treasured. He tried not to be materialistic, not when the two of you came from families where your parents left you with your grandparents, heading off for long work days, each blinding into the one before it. But he couldn’t help himself. Sleek cars, branded clothes for the both of you, a promise ring, rosegold band lined with small peridots on your finger; a matching watch band for him, your birthstones surrounding the watch face. 

The car came alive with a smooth, deep hum. You couldn’t look at Seungcheol, staring down at your ring. 

Seungcheol was a man far above you in all aspects of the word. Once the two of you had stood side by side on the ground, your childhoods spent running from one house to the next, your grandmothers wearing matching, knowing smiles. But then he had left for the city, his dreams so big and bright, promises to return heavy on his tongue and weighing down on your heart. 

And he had returned for you. You had waited for him, both feet on even ground, but now you couldn’t help but think. 

Did you belong? Did you belong in this sleek black car with your ordinary desk job? Did you belong on his arm, when he shined so brightly and you blended amongst the crowd? 

Seungcheol pulled onto the interstate, fingers drumming on the wheel. Once he got into a comfortable pace, he removed one of his hands and moved it to your thigh. He grabbed your hand, thumb running over the ring absentmindedly. 

His nails were so perfect, you thought. Clean and manicured, trimmed. Your own were uneven, chewed with specks of dirt underneath them. 

You moved your hand from his, clenching your hands together. You shifted back in the seat. 

“Baby?” Seungcheol asked, glancing over at you. “What’s wrong? You tired?”

“It’s --” You sighed, looking out the window. Darkness had long descended on the city, traffic on the highway loose. “It’s nothing.”

There was a temporary silence. “I don’t think it’s nothing. Come on, baby.”

“Do you think we’re right for each other?”

As soon as it left your mouth, you regretted it. You wanted to reach out and grab the words from the air, throw them out the window. They felt so wrong. They felt wrong once you said them, real and tangible. They weren't just your silly thoughts anymore. 

He was quiet beside you. But you weren’t foolish enough to think that he had forgotten about it, that he was ignoring it. That wasn’t who Seungcheol was. 

“I want you to say that again,” he said, voice heavy. “Say that again.”

You felt like crying. How horrible you were. Seungcheol had a wonderful day, surrounded by people who loved and adored him, and here you were. Ruining it with your venomous words. 

“I just --” You broke off, throat thickening with the weight of your words. “Won’t you regret this?”

He was quiet again, though this time it was a baffled, agitated sort of silence. A car roared past you. He tapped his finger against the wheel. “Since you seem so knowing on the subject,” Seungcheol began, his voice tense, “why don’t you enlighten me further on my regrets.”

You took a deep, shuddering breath. The stars were completely hidden by the city. Your tears rose up, stinging at the corner of your eyes. “It’s just. We’re so different.”

“We’ve always been different. I don’t see why it matters now.”

You sniffled, ashamed of yourself for causing his voice to harden like that. Seungcheol didn’t yell at you, not after witnessing you flinch back from him once as teenagers. Still, the hardness in his voice, the absolute void of any affection and emotion, made you feel as if you had been yelled at. 

Disappointment, you found, was just as bad as anger. 

“We were kids,” you said.

“Oh, so now that we’re grown it suddenly matters? What the fuck, Y/n. What the fuck is this? What are you trying to say? That these past years haven’t mattered? That we don’t matter? That I don’t matter?”

“No,” you began feebly. “I just --”

Seungcheol interrupted, his red-hot anger slowly beginning to bubble up and out of his mouth. “This is so -- what? You’ve suddenly decided that we’ve wasted the past twenty-five fucking years of our lives? That suddenly because we’re grown that it makes everything fucking invalid?”

“Seungcheol,” you whispered, speechless. 

“I’m so fucking mad at you.” Seungcheol announced. He glanced behind him before turning on the turning signal. Seungcheol merged off of the highway, onto an exit. “I can’t fucking. So everything you’ve ever said to me doesn’t matter?”

Finally a sob, loud and ugly, erupted from you. You pressed your hands up to your face, obscuring it from him. You were shaking. Your heart was bleeding, it felt like. “I love you,” you sobbed, “I just don’t know what to do when you’ll stop loving me.”

He was quiet, the car following a curve off the exit. When the car straightened out, his hand appeared on your thigh. Seungcheol squeezed it once before moving his hand again, grabbing your arm. His hand slid up your arm, wrapping around your wrist. Seungcheol moved your hand from your face, sliding to hold onto your fingers, ignoring the wetness from your tears. 

“You can’t,” he began, voice thick with emotion. “You can’t decide that for me. You can’t suddenly decide that I’ll stop loving you. That’s not -- Baby, that’s so unfair.”

You sobbed again, nodding against your hand. He pulled into a gas station, putting the car in park. Seungcheol undid his belt, turning to you. He reached out, taking both of your hands. “I want you to tell me what’s going on, baby. Give it to me straight.”

You sniffled. You reached up, removing your hand from his to rub at your nose. Seungcheol tsked at you, reaching into the glovebox and removing a tissue. He gently pressed it against your nose, wiping. 

“Come on, baby.” He muttered. His eyes were so wide, shining with unshed tears. “Let me see what’s going on inside that head of yours.”

You took a deep, shuddering breath. “It’s just -- Seungcheol -- you’re so amazing.”

He blinked, not quite following. 

“You -- you make more money in a month than I do in a year,” you went on, refusing to look at him. “Everyone knows your name. You’re -- you’re amazing and brilliant and famous, and I’m so ordinary and dull and work at a desk.”

Seungcheol let out a loud sigh, one of his hands moving to brush at your cheek and remove some of the tears there. “You know how stupid that sounds?”

“I know!” You sobbed, nodding. “It’s so fucking stupid but I can’t stop thinking about it. Seungcheol --”

He leaned fully over the center console, as close as he could get to you. He wound one arm around your shoulders, bringing you into him. “Baby. You are the most beautiful, brilliant, spectacular, amazing, perfect person in the world.”

You shook your head against him, but he sank one hand into your hair and stopped you. “Listen to me, Y/n. You are. You are so perfect. Do you remember the last tour? I couldn’t even make it through Japan. And I was so, so angry. Angry at myself, angry at my brain. But you weren’t. You just held me, loved me. Even though I felt so fucking ugly, you loved me like I was someone worthwhile. And baby --” 

He pulled away, his fingers swiping at the tears beneath your eyes. “I’m telling you right now. You’re fucking worth it. You’re perfect, and beautiful inside and out, and even if you weren’t you still would be because you’re mine. You’ve been mine since we were five and scaring my big brother with worms. You were mine when I left for Pledis. You were mine when you began college, when I came home from that tour. 

“You were mine, just like I’m yours. You’re still mine, I’m still yours. I will never, ever, regret this. I will never regret you.” He sniffled, and when you met his eyes they were slightly red. He was such an ugly crier, you thought, but still you couldn’t help but think he was the most beautiful person in the world. “Every single fucking day I wake up and think of how blessed I am to have you by my side. Whether you work in a desk or fucking -- if you decide to be a damn professional table tennis player. You’re mine, and I’m keeping you.”

You nodded, sniffling once more. “I’m sorry, Cheol.”

He shook his head. Seungcheol pitched forward, pressing his mouth to your hairline. “Don’t be, baby. Just promise me the next time you start thinking like that, you’ll tell me.”

“Cheol --” 

“I know,” he interrupted, though not unkindly. “I know how hard it is. But you’re mine, and you know how I like to take care what’s mine. I can’t do that if you’re not telling me what’s going on in that beautiful head of yours.”

You swallowed, a deep sigh leaving you. “I love you, Seungcheol.”

“I love you,” he returned, as easily as breathing. "Now let's go get some drinks, some ramen, and then we'll go home and cuddle in bed. Okay?"

You pressed a kiss to his chin, breathing in the smell of his expensive perfume and aftershave. "Okay."

Seungcheol might have flown to the sun, might glow and shine like a star; you might be standing with both feet firmly on the ground, squinting against the sun, watching as he took off. But the thing was, you would come to realize, that no matter how far Seungcheol flew, no matter how close to the sun he got, he would always come back to you.

Always.

#my writing #scoups #scoups fic #scoups oneshot #scoups drabble #s.coups fic #s.coups oneshot #s.coups drabble #s.coups angst #scoups angst #choi seungcheol #choi seungcheol fic #seungcheol #svt #svt fic #svt oneshot #svt drabble #svt angst #seventeen fic #seventeen oneshot #seventeen drabble #seventeen angst

[miabebe]

The Legend of The Sea

"You're crying? You must be turning human, the MerFolk don't cry."

"Of course we do. Why do you think the Sea is nothing but salt?"

Pairing: Choi Seungcheol × reader

Genre: Heavy Angst, Romance, Implied smut

Word count: 14K (completed)

A/N: This was supposed to be a very long fic with lots of dialogue and lot of plot but I decided to take a turn and write a shorter version! It's very different from my usual writing style, it would be great to recieve your thoughts and comments! I'm considering writing a epilogue if the response is good :)

Tags: @xcynthiaaa @dr3aluv5 @unlikelysublimekryptonite @orcasandtea @letsplayitcool @idubutily

It all started the day you woke up on the beach with that unbearable pain searing through you.  

The air was cool, the sand was hot; the seagulls were flying across the blue sky, the sound of the waves was like a beautiful melody – it was like a perfectly painted picture. It should have felt pleasant, it should have felt serene, instead you felt immense pain, like your guts were turning inside out and your chest was being split into two.

And it just wouldn’t stop. Even if you thrashed about in the sand or let out soundless screams clutching your chest, nothing could make the pain stop.  

Except the soft laughter.  

Someone else was here. 

As the pain ebbed at the sound of a voice, fear came rushing in its place.  

Someone else was here.   

Your instincts told you to hide so you did, scrambling to your knees in the sand, crouching behind one of the many large boulders scattered around, trying your best not to be found. And to not let curiosity get the better of you….. until it eventually did.

You allowed yourself to peak, just a little, just to put a face to the voice and instead saw a bouncing fluffy cloud of white. Strange. You didn’t know clouds came down like that. Or that they had eyes, because suddenly, this one looked right at you.

You immediately retreated back into your hiding but it was in vain - within seconds, it made its way over and much to your surprise, jumped right into your lap, covering you in wet, eager licks. You panicked, trying to defend yourself, although it didn’t feel like much of an attack.  

And that was when you saw him.  

First, he was just a silhouette, a dark outline against the sun but when he crouched down to meet your eye, you realised he was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen. He had such pretty hazel eyes, lighter in the middle, darker on the outside. Then there were the thick, dark eyebrows and thicker darker hair, swept back by the wind. He was wearing a white dress shirt, the first two buttons (unnecessarily) undone, the sleeves (needlessly) pushed up to his elbow. But your eyes were stuck on his lips – red, full of life and moving – he was saying something.   

You can’t hear him, not with the way your stomach was turning and turning and turning and then unable to hold back, you gave in. You turned and doubled up, finally throwing up all that discomfort into the sand, breaking into a fit of cough. The man before you though, wasn’t fazed. Rather, he was efficient, quickly getting up, pulling you away from the mess gently and handed you the bottle of water he had on him. You refused - water was only making you more nauseous.

He didn’t insist, instead he unfolded a large piece of cloth, (later you learnt that it was called a picnic blanket) and threw it over you. It was only its warmth that you realised – unlike him, every bit of your skin was exposed. You held the fabric closer to yourself hoping you could just bury yourself in the sand instead of having to face him – something about the way he looked at you made you feel very vulnerable.  

He then asked if you were feeling okay but only received silence as an answer. The truth was, you weren’t. Not only were you in the middle of nowhere, you had no idea why or how you got there. It seemed like he understood that; like he realised you were lost and needed help. When he got up and held his hand out though, you didn’t take it. Instead, you took support of the boulder behind you and got up on your own, only to lose your footing and stumble right into his arms. You instantly pulled yourself away and took another faltering step and then another, and then fell right back into his arms again. He was amused but didn’t say or do anything except watch you try, ankles sinking in the sand, knees unfaithfully giving away every time, until finally you gave up and took his hand. Slowly and silently, he led you far away from there.  

That day you learnt his name was SeungCheol.  

----------------------------------------------------------

That white cloud, Kkuma, was apparently what humans called a dog.  

While humans efficiently seemed to walk on two legs and could converse for hours, dogs apparently walked on four legs and couldn’t talk. Though you certainly looked like a human, you often wondered if you and Kkuma were the same. You too happened to find long hours of walking and talking difficult and more than anything, you didn’t seem to enjoy the company of other humans that much. That’s why the last one month, you spent most of your time with Kkuma, far away from most people, all the way across the town, in a small settlement between the lake and the mountains, in Seungcheol’s cottage.  

Seungcheol’s home was your safe haven. Rather, Seungcheol was your safe haven.  

When you were with him, when you looked at him, you always forgot that it had been four weeks and you still had no idea who you were, that you had no memories, you had no life.  

Because Seungcheol gave you a life. He taught you to walk the way you saw mothers hold the hands of their little babies, encouraging them to take a step forward. He taught you to read, scribbling away alphabets with you for hours on end, even when little children laughed at you for not understanding. He taught you that a fork was not the same thing as a comb and that water was used to wash yourself, and that fire was hot and burnt things.

He didn’t just teach you things, he cared for you. He noticed you liked the red and filled your wardrobe with red dresses. When you told him you really liked the taste of fish, fish was all he cooked for weeks. Though he never seemed to like being away from Kkuma, his little princess, he would always leave her behind to give you company whenever he left. 

Seungcheol left the house every morning at the break of down. So did most men, you noticed. The lady who lived down the stone pathway told you that men went out to make money while their wives, who stayed at home, cooked for them. That day you tried to cook for the first time, and asked Seungcheol if you were his wife. He laughed, then choked on a fish bone and asked you to leave all the cooking to him from here on and so you did.

Every day, Seungcheol would cook before he left while you stood beside him, watching in awe, handing him whatever he asked for. You usually ate breakfast and lunch with the animals in the stable but you always had dinner with Seungcheol. No matter how long he was gone for, end of the day, he always made it back to you.   

You watched the sun slowly setting behind the mountains. He should be here soon, which was why you shouldn’t be sitting by the lake anymore. Seungcheol always warned you to maintain a safe distance from it, to never go too near. He said it was dangerous, that people drown because they cannot breathe under water. You had seen it.  

When the woodcutter’s young boy fell into the lake a few weeks ago, you watched him thrash in the water, struggling to come up. A few brave people jumped in to save him but the boy never came out again. Everyone in town was scared of the lake, they hated it. Only the old ‘crazy’ lady that lived by the edge of the forest ever went near it. She wasn’t afraid of it; she said the lake was barely dangerous - it was the sea that was bad. That it had terrifying monsters and horrors that should never be uncovered. She liked the lake and honestly, so did you.

You liked how it never really felt cold and how the temperature was always just nice. You liked how all the fish swam up to you whenever you dangled your feet in, sitting by the bank, how at peace it all made you feel.  

But when you saw Hannie in the sky, you immediately pulled your legs out of the water and hid the wetness of your feet under the fabric of your long skirt. Hannie was Seungcheol’s other pet, a pretty, baby white dove. He wasn’t a pet, not really, he belonged to the skies but Hannie loved to follow Seungcheol everywhere and Seungcheol loved it just as much. Actually, the whole town seemed to love white doves – it was on their flags, their shields, their uniforms. Seungcheol said it was the emblem of the kingdom. You had no idea what that meant, and frankly you didn’t care much. All that mattered was that whenever you spotted this little white bird, instantly recognisable by the small tinge of red right in the middle of its chest, it meant Seungcheol was home. As it softly landed on the fence, right before the sun was completely engulfed by the mountains, you heard Seungcheol’s horse and opened the gates to let them in.  

Over dinner, Seungcheol told you about the fight that broke in the marketplace. It’s a funny place the market, something always seemed to be happening there. On the weekends, you would follow him through it as he went vendor to vendor, making his purchases. The people of the market were actually sweet. They would always smile and try to talk to you but you could never bring yourself to talk back, you could never find the right words to say. Instead, you’d simply stare blankly then move closer to Seungcheol, holding on to him. Eventually, they all started assuming you couldn’t speak. You didn’t correct them and looking at your reluctance, neither did Seungcheol. He would simply wave them away, or shoo the kids who seemed to tease you. As long as you were outside, Seungcheol would never leave your side or your hand.  

You didn’t like going out very much, the big crowds and all those loud noises were always highly uncomfortable but the few times Seungcheol insisted you come with him and said it would be fun, it was actually not that bad. He took you to the town’s lights festival, where every inch of the streets and houses was covered with the prettiest coloured lights, and also to the annual horse racing competition which was exhilarating beyond belief. Your favourite though was children’s drama day, when the little kids of the town participated in skits looking a lot, lot smaller than the original characters were supposed to be. He didn’t though, take you to that big feast that happened in the castle. You didn’t really mind – something about the castle was just very unnerving.  

It stood tall and proud, all the way at the edge of the town, up a long winding route, at the edge of the cliff, looking down at the sea waters. Initially you had no idea what a castle even was, but over time you learnt that it was where the king lived. The king was the most important person in the town and supposedly the kindest, wisest and strongest man too. If you didn’t know better, you would have thought Seungcheol was the king. Afterall, he helped everyone in the neighbourhood, he solved the fights in the markets, he protected the settlement from the wild dogs and other beasts of the forest. But Seungcheol was not the king. The king lived in the castle and Seungcheol lived with you.  

After dinner, like every other day, you sat in Seungcheol’s study, practicing writing your alphabets as he went through endlessly long scrolls of his own. Today when you handed him your work, he scolded you yet again for rushing through the last few lines. You knew you shouldn’t have but you can never help it because the faster you finished, the sooner Seungcheol would read to you. Granted you knew how to read now but you weren’t really good at it, not everything made sense. The small books were easy but they were boring - it was always about animals and children and other things. The big books were where everything interesting was.  

Every night before you went to sleep, Seungcheol would bring out a book, sitting down by the fireplace and you would curl up next to him, leaning over as he read to you. Sometimes he would read out history, recounts of great wars and heroes and sometimes about legends, the fire breathing dragons, sea monsters, fairies in the woods. While you listened to all of them with the same fascination and curiosity, a selected few made you feel somewhat…..different – the ones about true love. About two people fighting all odds to be together. About two people wanting to be with each other more than anything.

Whenever Seungcheol read those to you, you somehow saw yourself in those words. Or rather, those words in you. You found that ‘quickening heartbeat’ whenever your hand brushed against the man beside you. His compliments made the ‘heat in your cheeks rise’. There was a constant ‘nervous fidgeting of the fingers’ when you were around him and sharing of the ‘secret glances’. Even now as he was reading you were looking at him, at the way his lips were moving and how soft they looked and wondering how much softer they would feel against yours.

When Seungcheol turned to you, sensing your eyes on him, meeting them without hesitation, you could have leaned in, you could have found out. But you didn’t; you didn’t dare. Instead, you looked down at the book, at the pictures of the prince and princess dancing, wondering if you too had a happily ever after written in your fate.  

Maybe it was, because a few days later, when Seungcheol looked at you like that again, you didn’t hold back anymore. You didn’t want to. This time you leaned in, gently pressing your lips onto his, discovering much to your relief that they were indeed every bit as soft as they looked. His eyes widened when you pulled back immediately, but he didn’t say or do anything. Then a silence followed, heavy with confusion and anticipation and so many other things that you couldn’t quite fathom so you quickly excused yourself from there stating it might rain and you forgot to close your bedroom windows.

As you shut the doors of your room behind you, hand on your chest, you felt your heart racing away but you should have been at peace, right? You had finally plucked up the courage and satiated all that bubbling curiosity. Instead, you felt like you were going to lose your mind – now that you had a taste, you wanted more.   

Days passed before you finally kissed him again.

It was on a rainy night and you were sitting closer to him than usual, as though the fire was not enough to keep you warm. It started the same way, first a few stolen glances, then a long silent stare and then you were kissing him, soft and sweet but this time he pulled back and you didn't let him. Instead you grabbed a fistful of his shirt, holding him close, whispering that you wanted to do it again. He listened, kissing you back but it was different this time and god did it set off something in you.

His lips became demanding, and his hands were everywhere - in your hair, running down your back, on your waist. He took your breath away, quite literally because he just wouldn't stop and you couldn’t breathe. You didn't want to either but after what felt like eternity, you had to break apart, feeling all giddy. Seungcheol then gave you the brightest smile and one last peck. 

That went on for many more days. Sometimes it was sweet and simple, sometimes hot and heavy. Initially the books were your only witness then there were more. The peaking sun as he gave you a peak before he left in the mornings, the pots and pans of the kitchen while he focused on you instead of the burning bread, and kkuma, when he forgot to seek while she hid, his attention on your mouth instead. Everything was going blissful.

Then one day Seungcheol didn't come home even after the sun set.

You waited by the gate for a long time, but neither Hannie, nor Seungcheol, nor his horse could be seen. That was the first night you spent alone - shivering in the cold and terrified. The storms had begun outside, the rain was drowning everything in its way and as each hour passed, you sunk deeper and deeper into despair.

Even when the sun came up again the rain didn't stop, the pain didn't stop. Though you hadn't slept or eaten in hours you only thought about him. Even kkuma got tired of waiting and curled up in the warmest spot in the house but you stood by the door the whole time until you couldn't anymore.  

Not when you saw finally saw Hannie in the sky but Seungcheol didn't follow. That was when you knew something was terribly wrong. You immediately grabbed a lamp and were ready to set off to find him on your own when you saw the paper tied to the bird’s little foot. I'll be back soon it read in the handwriting you recognised was Seungcheol's, a wave of relief crashing over you.  

But it took very, very long for 'soon’ to come.

The rain had stopped, the sun had set, the sky had cleared and the stars were pitifully watching the way you sat against the door, desperately fighting your eyes threatening to fall shut. That was when you felt Seungcheol's hand on your face, gently tucking your hair behind your ear.  

You instantly got up, throwing yourself into his arms and for the first time ever, broke down, sobbing into his chest. He held you like that for as long as you didn't let him go, softly patting you, telling you it was okay, and that he's home. There was apparently a landslide near the mountains and he had to help the people stuck there but you didn't care what his reasons were. You were never going to let him go ever again, you'd fight the sun from coming up tomorrow morning if needed.

Seungcheol simply laughed and said first you should fight your stomach, it seemed like it was struggling in there. It was only when you admitted you hadn't eaten since last night that he let you go and walked into the kitchen to whip you a quick morsel.

That night he said he was too tired to read to you. Instead, he placed a soft kiss on your forehead with an apology and was about to retire to his room when you held him by the hand, scared to let him go again. He tried to comfort you but the tears just wouldn’t stop, not until he cupped your cheek and kissed you, whispering about how he missed this, how he missed you. You confessed that you did too, and his absence made you feel terrible, like never before.

Let me make you feel good then he said. But if he wanted to help you, why did it seem like he was pleading? Like if you didn't agree he would lose it? So you agreed, letting him do whatever he wanted, whatever he needed.

His mouth was hot on yours, hands wandering all over and when they tugged the strings of your dress, you let out an inaudible gasp against his lips. He swallowed your words, undressing you slowly, with his hands and his eyes. You felt so bare, so exposed yet you didn't feel like hiding from him - you wanted him to explore you however he could and god did he do it.

If you thought his mouth on yours felt good, the places he put it now were wild. It was like he somehow knew every sensitive bit of your skin and went straight for it. He wasn't lying, this was better than good, it felt euphoric. He unravelled you with his touch, his hands in places even you hadn't felt yourself. You wanted more, you wanted so much more and he gave it, over and over again, letting you feel every inch of him, reaching as deep inside you as he could, like any distance between the both of you was unbearable. You let him consume you in his fire as the pain turned to a pleasure like never before, a coil tightening in the pits of your being. The both of you whispered each other’s names for as long as you could hold it until you finally let go and so did he, filling you with every last essence of him. As you laid side by side breathless, staring at the roof, you saw the stars have come down, swirling across the ceiling and you fell into a deep slumber.  

When you woke up that morning, the sun was almost right on top of the cottage, half the day having already passed. Seungcheol didn't leave that day, instead he was right there, pressed against your back, wrapping you in his embrace, your limbs messily tangled with each other’s. When you tried to free yourself from him, he pulled you closer, burying his face in your neck, taking in as much of you as he could before he said he had to leave again. I'll come back to you, he promised and you did not let him see how tears brimmed in your eyes as you waved him away.

After that day though, you never cried again. Or ever slept in your own bedroom. Like promised every night Seungcheol returned to you and every night you lay between the sheets together, some days making love, some days simply talking and laughing away, some days just drifting away to sleep in each other’s arms. It truly felt like happily every after but you forgot, happily ever after was only for fairytales.

----------------------------------------------------------

It was just another normal day. The both of you had woken up as usual to the crowing of the rooster before dawn. You gathered the vegetables in the garden while Seungcheol made the most wonderful soup, perfect for a cold day. After he kissed you goodbye and left, you cleaned the stables, drew water from the well, tended to the garden, washed up, donned your favourite red dress, ate lunch, took a nap, played with kkuma, and finally, sat by the lake again, trying to catch your breath. It was the same routine as the last eight weeks.  

As you unconsciously plucked on the grass, your mind couldn’t help but wander back to a question that had been plaguing you these days. Was this all your life was going to be? The same routine, waking up everyday knowing it was going to be the exact same as yesterday and will be the exact same as tomorrow? Sure, you loved Seungcheol and Kkuma and Hannie and this little life you had built together, but you couldn’t help but think if you were made for something more. This couldn’t be it right?  

It wasn’t. And you were moments away from finding out.

You were so lost in thought, you didn’t notice Hannie in the sky until he landed right next to you, making you hurriedly jump to your feet to get away from the lake only for your damned dress to get tangled between your feet, making you fall right into the waters. Thank God Seungcheol had reached just in time to see you disappear under the surface and immediately dived in. Using all his might he pulled you up before you were lost in the depths, coughing and catching his breath as he crawled onto the bank.

That was the first day things went very, very differently.  

Instead of greeting Seungcheol like you usually did every day, you shivered, walking away into the house to dry yourself. You didn’t change into another red dress but a blue on this time that made even Seungcheol raise an eyebrow in surprise. Dinner was not the same too. The kimchi which never ran out had finally run out, there was apparently no fish in the market today and seungcheol bought eggs for the first time. When he insisted you would like the taste, you tried it and you indeed did like it, a lot. He grinned at you and said you could always trust his word but how could you anymore? 

He told you to stay away from the lake, that people couldn’t breathe under it but when you fell in, you could. In there you felt, if not more, just as alive and breathing and the water – it spoke to you. At first you were sure you were dying - you should have listened to Seungcheol, you should have stayed away but here you were in the middle of the lake, so close to death that you were hallucinating voices. But when you realised you were actually breathing, you listened. 

Finish your mission Y/n. Finish the mission and you can become who you really are again. You can join the waters again. 

You didn’t understand.  

That night instead of a fairytale, you ask Seungcheol to tell you about the legend of the sea again so he did.

Centuries ago, back when there was magic on Land, there was an ancient war between two of the most powerful kingdoms of Earth – the Chois and the Kangs. They battled tirelessly, day and night, for months to the point where uncountable bodies began piling, resources began running out and even the heavens begged them to stop - there would be nothing left of the Earth this way. But that’s the thing about power – relinquishing it was not an option.  

Finally, one unfortunate day, the Chois gained an upper hand in battle, forcing the Kangs to seek refuge in hiding. The Kangs though, disappeared overnight - though the Chois searched every corner of Land, they could not find them. It was only when they sort to use magic to find them that victors of the battle realised, they had lost their most prized possession – the Sceptre. The sceptre was like the motherboard of all magic on Earth – it was the source. After years of combing every inch of Land, the Chois finally came to the conclusion that the Kangs and the Sceptre were in the one place that no one on Land could reach – The Sea.  

Indeed, powered by magic, the entire kingdom of the Kangs and all those who stood by their side had retreated into the ocean, making a life for themselves there. Using the magic, they kept themselves alive, preparing once again to battle for what they believed was rightfully theirs. But the Earth could not take another war, at this rate, nothing would be left and so, the Council of the Land and the Council of the Sea were formed, to keep peace between both kingdoms. After months of debate, both councils came to a Pact.

The Kangs were allowed to keep the magic but were forbidden from ever stepping on Land. The very magic they stole was used to strip them of their ability to breath air, forcing them to stay in the waters for life. The Chois on the other hand, were allowed to rule Land but were never to see magic again – the Land would not know of it and would not use it anymore. And most importantly, the Land and the Sea were never to meet. Every single ship in sight was burnt, boats were torn apart, walls were built at the border of every coastal city.  

Over generations, not only did the Land never interact with the Sea but they began to fear it, malicious stories of monsters and merpeople making their way into children’s bedtime stories and fairytales. A few brave, rebellious souls would try to break The Pact and venture into the Sea but no one really lived to tell the tale.

Seungcheol said that there will never be anyone with a tale to tell because like all legends, this too was no more than just a story and a speculation. But for the first time, you don’t believe him.  

Instead, you think merpeople truly do exist and as impossible as it sounded, you might just be one of them

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You looked at the pretty red dress you had laid out on the bed for today.  

Today was important for more than one reasons.

Today was the annual citizen’s banquet, which meant it was the first time you were going to the castle. Today was also the first time you were going to see the king and most importantly, today was also probably the day you were going to find out who you really are.  

You didn’t tell Seungcheol about what happened that day in the lake. Maybe because he believed that the Legend of the Sea was not true or because you yourself were not sure you entirely believed it, but somehow you, who told Seungcheol about everything, didn’t tell him about this. You needed more confirmation first, you needed to go into the lake once more.

But surprisingly, the lake you once liked so much looks more daunting now. You were not afraid of drowning, rather you were afraid what being able to survive the waters would mean. You kept avoiding it, telling yourself one day you couldn’t go in there because you had to brine the vegetables and that you had to bathe the cows or whatever other excuse you could find until one day all the chores were over and you ran out of excuses. You had to go in now.  

Carefully looking around to make sure there was no one in sight, you sat down on the bank, put a foot first, then the other, then slowly lowered yourself in, submerging into the waters, kkuma’s barks fading out, the voices taking over.  

Finish your mission Y/n and join the waters again.  

It was true.  

You weren’t imagining things, you were indeed breathing in there, the voices were real, everything was ridiculously real. It didn’t make any sense but it also really did. The water felt like home, like you belonged. You could swim much faster, better than you could walk. You felt stronger, more powerful, more like you in there. Even though the lake looked like it held darkness, you could clearly see everything below – the animals, the plants, the life, all of it. Oh, you wanted to join the waters, you wanted to be here forever.

But when you opened your mouth to ask what the mission was, only the gurgling sound of bubbles left you. Somehow just the thought was enough because you heard the answer soon enough and it sent a chill down your spine.  

Kill the King.  

You looked at yourself in the mirror, donning your dress.

The price for finding out who you were was to kill the king, the most important man in the town.

You couldn’t.

Taking the life of another could not be the price of your truth. So, you had decided to forget about it. It was wrong and unethical and whoever asked you of that had clearly lost their mind except….. it was you.

The more you thought about it, the more you could not deny it – the voice in the lake was your own, as though you had left yourself a message, a reminder. Why on Earth would you want to kill the king? Then again, how did you, someone who clearly belonged to The Sea, find themselves on land? Why was it that you remembered nothing?

Maybe killing the king had a bigger purpose, a noble one, after all, all kings were not necessarily good.  

You had to find out. You had to meet him and see for yourself.

And as though the universe was aligning things into place for you, the night you decided to ask Seungcheol about visiting the castle, he mentioned that the king was arranging a grand banquet to which all citizens of the town were invited. He said if you were not comfortable you didn’t have to go but you cut him off much to his surprise, insisting that you want to attend.  

That’s how days later you found yourself standing at the gates of the castle as the crowd of town poured into the estate on either side of you. Seungcheol was supposed to pick you up tonight but instead there was a carriage waiting for you, with a message relayed by the footman that he got caught up in something and will meet you in the banquet.

The banquet was arranged in a large hall right in the middle of the castle and it was perhaps the most stunning place you had ever seen. The stone walls were covered in drapes of red and purple, the large windows shining with the views of prettily trimmed gardens. There were beautiful paintings everywhere, statues of men in armour and food of all kinds being serve around. Almost the whole town fraternised under the large golden chandelier, each dressed better than the other, chattering away in small whispers. You stayed near the large pillars of stone, as far away from the crowd as possible, eyes still looking for Seungcheol, ears trying to tune out all that people were saying around you.  

But you couldn’t ignore the loud sound of the trumpet as it echoes through the hall, followed by an announcement that the King had arrived. As your heart thumped away in your chest, he appeared, at the top of the stairs that led down into the hall, dressed in what you thought was rather simple for a king. You wanted to move closer to get a better look as he descended down the stairs but you realised everyone around you was bowing down to him so you mirrored it, staring at the white marble of the floor. Its only when a pair of pretty leather shoes appear right before you that you allow yourself to look up, facing the one person you were to see tonight – the king.

He was nothing like you hoped. He didn’t look malicious, or evil or like he was even capable of doing something wrong. He had the kindest eyes, crinkled with crows’ feet as he smiled at you so warmly, you felt nothing but comfort. Only one other person in this whole town ever made you feel safe like that. From the looks of his salt and pepper hair, he looked like he was aging, and the wisdom that came with time also shone on his face. He smiled so pleasantly, didn’t dress in a way that showed off all his wealth, and didn’t seem to harbour any sort of superiority because the moment the music swelled to life, he held his hand out to ask you, a commoner, for a dance.  

The whole town looked at you as though they were waiting so you placed your hand on his, letting him lead you to the middle of the floor as everyone else immediately moved to pick partners of their own.

Seungcheol had taught you how to dance. When you expressed your interest to go to the banquet, he told you there would also be a dance accompanying it and showed you how it was done. He was so patient with you, even though you stepped on his foot and banged his head with yours a few hundred times, bursting into a string of apologies whenever you did. But he only laughed, holding you close and dancing with you through the rainy night. You wondered where he was right now but that was the least of your worries considering you were dancing with the man you were deemed to kill and to your absolute disappointment, you could not find one reason to do so.  

You hoped so hard that you were right, that the king was a bad man and you were given this mission to make things right but he wasn’t. As much as you tried to not eavesdrop, you still heard whatever the people around you were whispering away. They were all in praises of him. They said he was a great man and under his ruling, the town was doing better than ever. They said the harvest was good thanks to him, that the they were safe from invasion thanks to him and were all living well thanks to him.

A part of you knew they were right – you had seen how happy and peaceful the townspeople always were, something that was only possible if they were in good hands. You could see for yourself what a wonderful man the king seemed to be and how everyone truly seemed to love and cherish him.

But a part of you didn’t want to believe that. You had to find a reason, something had to be wrong, you needed to justify why killing him was important. That was the only way to find out who you are.  

And as though the universe which had been so helpful so far decided now was the time to create chaos, the trumpet echoes through the hall again, announcing the arrival of the crown prince. When you see the person standing at the top of the stairs, you instant freeze, feeling your guts twist the way they did the first time you ever saw him – Seungcheol.  

Seungcheol was a prince. He was the crown prince of this land which meant he was the first born of the king.

That meant...... your mission was to kill the father of the man you loved.

As the townspeople gathered in the gardens below, you stood in a balcony of the castle, looking at the stars dancing in the sky.  

The whole night you had been feeling nothing but numb. The moment Seungcheol had appeared you excused yourself from the king, rushing out of the hall, trying not to throw up. Seungcheol immediately followed asking if you were okay but you didn’t answer. You did not see things unfolding this way. Not only did you not find a single reason why you had to kill the King, now you had one for why you shouldn’t do it.  

Seungcheol asked again, looking for answers in your expression but you just looked away, muttering that you had no idea he was the prince. He said he wasn’t trying to hide it from you, he just didn’t think about it. The whole town knew he was the crown prince so he never had to introduce himself that way. Besides, he didn't like to his status as royalty to define him so he didn’t usually mention it to anyone. As far as why he didn’t live in the castle was concerned, he started living in the cottage when he was 14 years old. That house was his mother’s, before the king and her fell in love and got married. After she passed away in the childbirth of her second child, he moved there so he could feel closer to her. His father too thought it was good for him to live among his subjects, to learn their problems and to gain their trust.  

You had nothing but silence to offer in return. It was all too much, all at once.  

The loud whispers of the town started fading out as the King walked in, standing among them. Seungcheol didn’t look too happy as he stared at the scene below him. He said he was worried about his father. You felt that churning feeling in your stomach once again. He said that he was getting old and it was getting harder for him to negotiate with neighbouring kingdoms, to keep war at bay. You didn’t understand what he meant.

He claimed the town was happy now but 3 months ago, nothing was going well. Their kingdom was under attack, everyone’s lives were threatened, the future looked very bleak. The king had somehow managed to save everyone then but unknown to the people, it was temporary. His father tried his best to negotiate and talk to the neighbouring kingdoms but there was no use – war has been declared against them yet again and he was worried King Choi was not strong enough for battle.

You held his hand stroking the back of it softly. He then apologised to you, confusing you even more. You asked him why but you had an idea already – he was taking his father’s place in war; he was going to lead the army.  

You felt as though someone pulled the ground below your feet and Seungcheol’s grip on your hand was the only thing saving you from falling. As crown prince it was his duty and you knew and understood but the thought of being away from him again was killing you on the inside. He said he wouldn’t be gone for long but you know what war meant - there was no guarantee of him even returning.

You hugged him shaking your head, refusing to let him go or insisting that he take you along with him but he simply hugged you back claiming that was not possible, it was dangerous. He told you to move to the castle while he was gone. Here you would be taken care of, you wouldn’t be lonely and most importantly, you would have the chance to get closer to his father.

You froze.  

Seungcheol let you go, making you sit on the moss-covered stone bench, sitting next to you. He said he wanted to leave you in good hands in case he didn’t make it back. You refused to listen to anything else, he promised he would always come back to you, that meant he had to come back. He laughed at your futile stubbornness, tucking your hair behind your ear, looking at you with a strange longing. You give him a soft peck on his lips to let him know he had no reason to long for you, you were always his. He pulled you in for more, taking your face in his hands, his mouth desperate against yours, like it was the last time, like a silent goodbye etched in his kiss.

It was only when the applause rang downstairs that he let you go, pressing his forehead on yours, sighing. You felt tears threaten your eyes once again as he caressed your cheek with his thumb softly, like he was trying to memorise how your face felt under his touch. He said he wished he had longer with you, he wished had done this earlier and slid onto the gravel floor onto his knees, looking up at you softly.  

Marry me, he whispered, holding your hands. 

You stared at him wordlessly as the sky behind you came alive with lights, fireworks prettily burning against the black canvas of the night. Maybe a few days ago if he asked you would have said yes without him even needing to finish. You would marry him right there and then but now you were torn. Kill the King. The words were constantly ringing in your head. How could you marry him if your mission was to…..  

He understood your silence as hesitance, saying you didn’t have to answer now, you could tell him when he returned - that way he would have something he had to come back for. He then pulled out a small necklace from his pocket, making you wear it, saying it was a reminder of him while he was away. You touched the pendant, feeling it with your fingers. It wasn’t like any jewel you had ever seen - it didn’t shine, it was an odd shape and it looked rather dull. He said it was a shell and it was from the sea.  

If he noticed your shocked reaction and stuttering as you asked him how he got it , he didn’t mention it. Instead, he answered that there was a path from behind his cottage that led to the other side of the forest, to a sea cave where land and sea met fearlessly. Before you came into his life, that was his favourite place to go - he often spent his free time there and that’s where he found this.  

You wonder if it’s a sign from the universe, receiving a part of the ocean at a time when you didn’t know what to choose.  

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The next morning, trumpets rang through the entire town, announcing that the neighbouring kingdom had declared war and the crown prince was leading the army to fight. People spilled onto the streets to watch the armoured and determined cavalry going to serve their kingdom, Seungcheol leading the troop all the way in front on his horse. You stood at the highest terrace of the castle, watching him leave, going further and further away, until the distance engulfed him and you couldn’t see him anymore. You barely had him to yourself for five minutes in the morning to say goodbye before he was called away. You convinced yourself that all this was temporary anyways, he would come back.  

With a heavy heart, you walked down the wide corridors of the palace, kkuma following your every step. You lived here now. Seungcheol had people shift your few things from the cottage to his room in the castle. Though the bed was beyond comfortable and the room was bigger than the whole cottage you lived in previously, you didn’t spend much time in there. Instead, you roamed around the gardens and corridors or stepped out into the marketplace that you never ventured in without Seungcheol by your side. Any place was better than his room. It reeked of loneliness and most importantly, it overlooked the sea. As much as the breeze gave you unexplainable comfort, it was also a constant reminder of your mission.  

As time passed, you found yourself less and less inclined to fulfilling your task. You tried your best to not let yourself be swayed but in vain – you could not help but like the king. He was nothing but welcoming and kind to you. Maybe Seungcheol told him or maybe it was just a constant in the Choi family, but he insisted that every night you join him for dinner. He would ask about your day and make light conversation, but unlike Seungcheol, he would retire early to bed. He was sick. You could see in the way he coughed through his meal, the way his eyes keep fluttering shut in tiredness towards the end of the night. Yet he did all he could to make sure you were alright.

He introduced you to the library in the castle and if you thought Seungcheol’s study had a large collection of books, this place was massive. Books were lined all the way up till the ceiling, there were all sorts of maps and globes scattered all over the room, shelfs lined with little trinkets and souvenirs from his travels. The King explained that Seungcheol like his mother, loved to explore and like him, loved science and this library was where it all came together. He used to be unstoppable ever since he was a child and his curiosity always landed him in trouble – the whole town was banned from stepping on the beach but nothing could stop him. He always wanted to explore the sea.  

It surprised you to learn about Seungcheol’s fascination with the sea because he had always told you to stay away from water, that it was dangerous. You spent days of your time in that library, going through his journals and drawings, but didn’t really understand all the scribbles of notes he had jotted everywhere. You did see on the map though, the location of the sea cave that Seungcheol had mentioned about, wondering if you could get any answers there, but somehow you could never bring yourself to go. The answers of the questions you had so far had not been pleasant.  

Then one day as you sat on the wooden floor of the sunlit room studying what looked like drawings of some strange contraption, Hannie appeared in the sky.  

You immediately got up, running out of the room, down the corridor, up the stairs, all the way to the top, to try and see Seungcheol reappear where you last saw him.

He didn’t.

Clouds made their way, covering the strong sun, submerging the town in a strange gloom. It all felt too apocalyptic. You rushed to find the King, learning that he was holding court, making your way to the hall, stopping right by the door and hiding yourself to overhear the discussion.

The Chois were ambushed.

More than half the forces were dead or injured, many were missing and as though your greatest fear came true, Seungcheol was missing too. He was also very badly injured and no one had seen or heard from him in two days, it was highly likely he succumbed to his injuries. You refused to believe it. He said he would come back to you, which meant he would, you believed him. But no one else seemed to share the same faith as you. They were going to give up, surrender the throne to prevent an attack on the town itself. That was when to everyone’s surprise you barged in.

You insisted nothing was wrong with Seungcheol and they had to find him and finish this war. They tried to reason with you, tell you the facts but you refused to hear it. You questioned how they could give up so soon and why they aren’t even trying to find him. They claimed they had to clear out from enemy territory, that it could be dangerous going back there. You turned to the King hoping you could at least reason with him but his tired old face looks like he’s already mourning his son.  You ran out of there, unable to come to terms with what was happening.

You would find him yourself if that’s what it took.

Rushing to the royal stables, you picked the horse that looked the strongest and forced its gates open, ignoring the crimson bleeding out of your hand as you cut it on the metal. Before the poor stable boy could stop you, you mounted it, riding out of the palace, into the unprepared town. People hurriedly ran out of the way, pulling their carts and children to the side, nothing but wind left behind as you raced through. You had your eyes on Hannie flying in the sky above you. You knew it could lead you to him, you just had to follow. You were almost successful in crossing the gates of the town, into the woods, when the royal guards caught up, surrounding you.

The head of security begged you to stop, that you were putting the kingdom in more jeopardy and you couldn’t let your desire to protect one man affect everyone. You wanted to argue, tell him that you didn’t care about anyone else and to insist that they let you go but when you turned and saw all the people stepping out of their houses to see what the commotion is, you let go the reins of the horse. Yes, finding Seungcheol was most important to you, but not at the cost of so many people’s lives. You knew better than that, you could never be that selfish.

As though Hannie sympathised, it landed on your softly shoulder, nuzzling your neck, cooing in your ear. You took him in your hands, the bloodied hand further darkening the red on its chest, a thought forming in your mind. You smudge the blood onto your fingertips, tracing a word onto its white, a word that you knew would bring Seungcheol back to you. As you set it free hoping it would find him, you watch the yes etched on it, praying to the skies that when it returns, Seungcheol follows it like always.  

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You didn’t return to the castle after that.  

Turning your horse in the other direction, you rode to Seungcheol’s cottage by the woods, the only place you felt close to him. The big room and big bed of the castle might be physically comfortable but nothing made you feel at peace like this house, your safe haven. You were curled up in the bed for hours now as the sun slowly began to descend behind the mountains. You just had to give it time. You kept telling yourself it wasn’t a matter of if Seungcheol returned but when. He would come back for you, he would fight all odds and come back, you knew it.  

The sound of the horses neighing at a distance made you sit up. The royal guards must be here to escort you back to the castle now that it was getting darker outside. You didn’t want to go. You couldn’t stand being in that castle again.

Grabbing the oil lantern nearby, you soundlessly left through the back door, kkuma following you just as quietly. You thought you could just wait it out until the guards didn’t find you and returned to the castle but when kkuma began wandering away, you had no choice but to follow her. Not listening to your hushed whispers, with a mind of her own, she ventured into the forest and thoughtlessly, you followed. It’s only when the trees parted that you realised where you were – the sea cave.  

You didn’t know what you were expecting when Seungcheol mentioned about this place but it was beyond beautiful. The crystal blue waves were racing back and forth on the golden sand, the stone wall of the caves were gradients of brown rocks and green weeds. There were holes eroded onto the roof, the evening sun softly pouring in and in that soft light you noticed in the corner, folded are some blankets and books that clearly belonged to Seungcheol – he indeed must have spent a long time here. Kkuma settled herself down in the warmth of the bundled cloths, as you placed the lantern on a nearby rock and kicked your shoes off, feeling the warm sand under your feet.  

The water was inches away. The Ocean, the place that, if you had assumed right, was your home. Every bone in your body was craving to be in it, to submerge in it, to just feel alive in it once again. You walked ahead, taking one step after another, but the closer you moved to the waters, the further it seemed to be moving away from you. You quickened your steps, but the Sea kept retreating, pulling away. It surprised you to receive such hostility from waters that always looked so welcoming but not more than the voice that boomed through the cave, making you look around in panic. There was no one, you were all alone and kkuma too was fast asleep, like she didn’t hear anything. When you turned back to the sea, you bit back a scream, coming face to face with a woman, whose eyes were piercing into you, her lips curled into a smile as her voice echoed through the cave again. 

I see you’ve finally found your way home.  

Pain like no other seared through your head, making you fall to your knees in agony, your dress fanning out in the sand. As the woman bent down to your level, you scrambled back, swallowing the phantom lump in your throat, taking a better look at her. Holding a staff in one hand, she looked as old as time, her white hair and ragged clothes floating like she was still in the waters and that’s when you realised, she wasn’t actually here – it was apparition, like… magic. As though she read your mind, she confirmed it indeed was magic, that she controlled all the magic of the Sea - she was after all the Sea Witch.  

You recalled Seungcheol’s story about how the Sea had taken away magic from the Land, watching the legend come to life before you as the woman floated a few feet above the ground, looking at you expressionlessly. Who am I? Do I belong to the Sea? Why am I on Land?  You knew she was the only one who could possibly have the answers and she did - for a price.  

She pointed at the shell on your neck, claiming it belonged to the Sea – give it back and you could have all the answers you wanted. You held it in your grasp; it was the only thing of Seungcheol’s you had with you. You could either lose it and learn who you are or keep it and walk away, return to the castle. You could let your forgotten past remain forgotten and think only about the future with Seungcheol.  

But is there a future? She asked, reading your mind yet again. You knew what she meant. Seungcheol went to war and people died in war all the time. If he did not make it back, you had no place on Land, no home, no one to call your own. But if you were to find out who you truly are, you could then return to where you truly belonged. You tightened your grip on the shell, the pressure opening your wound, the blood spilling again. Giving up this necklace meant admitting to the possibility that Seungcheol will not return. How did that make you any different from all the others in the court who you lashed out at? 

The Sea Witch looked at you fighting your own battle in your head. She held out her hand saying if it was meant to be, then Seungcheol would return to you, regardless of whether you had this necklace or not. You know she’s playing you but give in, ripping the chain from your throat and throwing it into the waters, watching it sink into the dark bottom.  

The waves which seemed so afraid of you, raised themselves, almost as though bowing to you and the Sea Witch mirrored their action before straightening and looking up but this time, respectfully not meeting your eye.  

What do you seek, Princess of the Ocean.  

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You held the dagger in your hand tight, hands not shaking as you approached the dining room.  

The moment you returned to the castle, the maids had told you dinner was served and the king was waiting for you. You washed up and changed out of your sand filled clothes into one of your usual red dresses. Maybe there was a reason why you liked red so much – maybe deep down you knew you needed to hide the blood on your hands somewhere.  

You had to kill the King tonight.  

You stood in front of the large doors, the dagger that the Sea Witch gave in your hands, hiding efficiently in the large fabric of your dress. Once you stepped in, everything would change. You would become the killer of Seungcheol’s father, but you would also finally be fulfilling your duty to your people, the MerFolk.  

The Sea Witch told you the story from when it all began. The legends were all true. The merfolk were real, the life under the sea was real, everything you had experienced was real. 3 months ago, you were a part of the Sea, living a carefree life as the youngest princess of the royal family. Then one move by King Choi and everything changed.  

Over the centuries even though the entire ocean was ruled by just one family, without the power of magic, land had split into many Kingdoms and many rulers. Unlike the peace in the Sea, Land was always at war with itself, neighbouring kingdoms attacking and occupying towns – they never got rid of the battle they thought they won. One such battle happened three months ago at the Kingdom of the Chois where they were invaded by their neighbours, the Hans. At the brink of losing war, King Choi did the unthinkable – he set sail.

His deep interest in the Sea, that his son eventually inherited, had led him to spend years of his youth designing and building ships, the last of which had been burned during the Pact. The Sea allowed his soldiers to take an alternative route to attack their invaders and drive them out but the moment the ships had touched the ocean waters, years of peace dissolved into chaos.  

As the calm waters were shaken, towns under the Sea began falling apart – many merfolk died, many lost their homes, many lost their way back and among all the tragedies, the greatest one was losing your mother, the Queen.  

Her death left the entire Ocean without a leader, without a protector. Your sister, the oldest in the family, who had been trained for years to take over as queen was missing, like many others in the aftermath. The kingdom waited for days for her to show up until it was not practical to anymore – the ocean needed rebuilding, it needed leadership and guidance. As the only one left in the royal family, you had offered to take your mother’s place as queen but the Council of the Sea refused. You were young and inexperienced and unlike your sister, you were not trained to take over the Kingdom. They wanted to hand the Sea to the Hwangs, another family who had their eye on the throne for centuries now and were willing to take up the responsibility of the Ocean.  

You couldn’t let that happen, not only would it crush your mother’s dreams if the Kang lineage of rulers ended with her but also the Hwangs were notoriously famous for their aggressiveness. Under their hands, there was no saying what the future of the Ocean would look like. The citizens of the sea protested too – they were all on your side, they wanted you to rule and so the Council of the Sea and the Hwangs agreed – if you could prove yourself worthy.  

Kill the King of the Land.  

Blood for blood. Get revenge for the destruction of the Sea, that was the order. That was the price for you to get back your kingdom and 100 days was all you had to do it.

That’s when they called on the Sea Witch. Breathing on Land for 100 days would require very powerful and ancient magic, something only she was capable of. But it would not be so straightforward. The process would be excruciatingly painful, almost like becoming a new person, like being born again - quite literally because it would wipe out all your memories, everything you know of the Sea would be taken away. You would be sent to Land like a blank slate.  

That meant you had 100 days to go on Land, figure out who you were, learn of your mission and complete it. Should you fail, not only would you lose your kingdom, but the waters had no forgiveness for those who disobeyed magic so ancient – you would join them again, but as sea foam.  

Today was day 92. You only had 8 days left.  

You pushed open the doors of the dining hall, eyes falling on the King tiredly slouched in his chair waiting for you. He must’ve fallen asleep because he didn’t move when you approached. You looked at face responsible for the death of your mother, the disappearance of your sister, the destruction of your kingdom and you felt numb. You still couldn’t bring yourself to hate him, but you also couldn’t walk away. Yes, if only he didn’t bring out his ships you wouldn’t have lost so much, you wouldn’t be here but you know like any other good king, he did it to save his people. And now you had to do whatever it took to save yours.  

And then fate smirked.

Just as you raised the knife and were about to plunge it in his chest, you heard the fluttering sound of wings and on the balcony landed Hannie, looking more red than white. The knife slipped from your hands, landing on the floor with a thud as the king stirred awake. His guards burst into the room as the royal trumpets echoed through the night. You rushed to Hannie in the balcony, the one that overlooked the town, and saw the oil lanterns of the houses, slowly increase in number, getting brighter and brighter in the darkness. The king and his men departed immediately and so you followed them, holding Hannie in one hand and your dress in the other, running down the palace corridors and out the gate to see a crowd gathered.  

As it parted, it revealed Seungcheol's horse and holding onto its reins walking it was Seungcheol, bruised and battered, blood splattered all over him, multiple wounds gashed open, barely but still alive. Take a staggering step at a time, he approached his father bowing and whispered, We won before collapsing into the gravel.  

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Seungcheol was immediately taken away by the royal physicians as the king announced to the people that the war was over and the town erupted into cheers. You tried to follow the doctors to be with him but they closed the door on your face, asking you to stay out. So, you stayed right outside, the whole night, prancing about, biting your nails, as you waited for the news.  

Instead, you were met with screams. You don’t know what they were doing to Seungcheol in there but he was evidentially in unbearable pain – you could hear in the way the screams ripped out of his throat, like he was in pure agony. It went on for hours and it was so terrifying to hear, you felt your heart shatter every time it rang through the halls. 

Finally at the crack of dawn he seemed to calm down and the doors finally opened. He was deeply wounded and his body was beyond exhausted, he just needed some sleep, the physicians assured you and the king, who unknown to you had also arrived. You thanked them and hurried in to see Seungcheol peacefully lying on the bed, bandages wrapped all over his body.

You sat beside him as the king gently stroked his son’s hair both proudly and sadly, muttering that he would pray for him to heal soon. As you held Seungcheol’s hand in yours, the king requested you to stay by the former’s side till he woke up. You assured him you would, to which he nodded and to both your shock and horror, pulled out the dagger which you had dropped in the dining room the day before. You held your breath as he placed it on the table beside the bed, not even looking at you. I believe this is yours.  

He knew.  

He figured out that you had attempted to take his life, but the tired old man didn’t say anything as he left. Instead, the royal guards placed at the door told you what you needed to know.

You failed your mission. Not only had you let down your people, you were discovered and now you were to be tried for treason. You only had till Seungcheol woke up. Lips quivering, you held onto his hand tighter. 

You didn’t know if fate was showing you mercy or prolonging your agony but it took almost 2 whole days for Seungcheol to finally wake up.   

You hadn’t left his room since you had entered it. Not only were you not allowed to, but you didn’t want to leave Seungcheol’s side. You either sat beside him, or in the balcony overlooking the ocean for hours together with kkuma curled up next to you and hannie flying around in the sky. The two of them had been awfully calm, as though they too knew what was coming.

Finally, on the 94th night, just as you had closed the doors of his bedroom and prepared your bed to sleep, Seungcheol stirred awake. You immediately rushed to his side as his eyes fluttered open, and the moment they landed on you, he broke into the most peaceful smile. You sighed in relief, softly holding his cheek in your hand, asking him how he was feeling.  

You said yes.  

Hannie flew into the room like a reminder of your message to him but his words only pained you. Things had changed so much since then. Not only could you not marry him but you had now become worthy of his hatred. You don’t think you can bear to see anything but love for you in his eyes.

Leaning down you kissed him, whispering that you loved him and that you wish no matter what, he always remembered that. He didn’t seem to understand your words, still reeling in the happiness of your acceptance of his proposal as he pulled you into his arms, wrapping you in the embrace you were craving for.  

As the two of you laid for hours together, wrapped in each other, he told you how they had been ambushed before they even reached the battlefield - someone had betrayed them. His horse had saved him, taking him away into the woods, far from his attackers but he was already very badly injured. It was Hannie who arrived with your yes that truly saved him. He knew he had to come back for you so he pushed through. He regrouped what was left of the army and infiltrated the enemy camp that was prematurely celebrating their victory and gained the upper hand.  

You snuggled closer in his warmth, hoping he wouldn’t see the guilt on your face when he spoke of you like you were his saviour. Everything would change tomorrow. Tonight was your last night with him, your last chance to create a memory for him to remember you by. As he went on about how tomorrow morning he would talk to the king about the wedding, you kissed him, cutting him off. Tonight you only wanted to love and love you did.  

Of all the nights you spent with Seungcheol, nothing felt like this. There was a strange desperation carved in the way you undressed each other, hands roaming, names whispered against skin. You took the lead this time, clambering on top of him and he stared at you like you were his whole world and more. Tucking your hair behind your ear, he told you how lucky he was to have you and you pushed the recurring feeling of guilt down and claimed him for yourself one last time.

A clash of hands, tongues and moans, he matched your need, leaving marks of love on your shoulder and chest. Burying your face in his neck, you held back the tears of pain and pleasure and a goodbye all dissolved in one as you came apart above him. Like always his arms held you in his embrace as though stopping you from losing yourself but it was too late. Everything had fallen apart already.  

----------------------------------------------------------

When you woke up, the bed was empty.  

Seungcheol was not in the room, neither were the maids scurrying in as usual, cleaning up and neither were the guards who were placed outside the doors all these days. You walked down the corridors which were overtaken by a strange emptiness, wondering where everyone was. It was late in the afternoon judging by the sun but the palace was looking bleaker than usual.  

That was when your eyes fell on the flag of the kingdom hoisted down, flying low.  

Mourning.  

You rushed back towards the bedroom wing of the palace, heart beating erratically against your still lungs, till you found the royal physicians walking out of a chamber, looking dejected. The kings chamber.  

As you got closer, you noticed the officials of the royal court had all gathered around, dressed in black, heads hanging, faces in sorrow. They parted, letting you walk in to see Seungcheol standing at the edge of the bed, looking down at the king who laid peacefully in a slumber he would never wake up from.

The moment you put your hand on his shoulder Seungcheol turned. He wasn’t crying but there was so much pain in his face, it made you want to take him in your arms and hide him there forever. But you didn’t. You rubbed his arms softly whispering that you will wait for him outside, knowing he needed time with his father, the last of his family.  

But the moment you stepped out, the royal guards surrounded you, their spears pointing at you from a distance and you knew the time had come. By the order of the late king, after Prince Choi was awake, you were to be imprisoned for treason. For life.  

 ----------------------------------------------------------

You might have been forced into a four stone walled dark cell for 5 days now but there was no greater prison that your own mind. As the moonlight creeped through the metal bars of the window on top, you sat crouched in the little dark space, leaning against the cold rocks. It was always so silent in here, you only ever heard the crashing of the waves against the walls, each ebb and flow reminding you of where you truly belonged.  

With the king now dead, your mission was complete, you could go back home. You could go back to your people, you could take back your kingdom but somehow you lacked the strength or the will to fight your way out of here. It would mean facing Seungcheol, who in the last many days had not come even once to see you. With each passing minute in his absence a part of you was glad to not see the disgust he would hold for you but another was broken at the thought of this being the end of the love you shared. As you fought your inner battle as a lover and a princess, time, the one thing that you did not have, kept slipping away.  

And then for the first time in 5 days, a shadow other than your own was cast in the moonlight. Seungcheol’s.  

You stood up, taken aback by his presence after so long but more by the sound of the gates opening and the guards asking you to step out, leading you out of the prison cell. You were free.  

It was only then in the light of the fire lit corridors that you saw him, dressed in finery like never before and on his head rested the whole responsibility of the kingdom - the crown. 

It was no longer Prince Seungcheol, he was now King Choi Seungcheol.  

Seeing him like that, your heart swelled with pride. When you found out Seungcheol was the prince you weren’t really as surprised as you should have been because it was only then that things made perfect sense. You had seen the king in him all along. One of the reasons that you loved him so much was because of what a good man he was, always thoughtful of others, always helping those in need, always looking out. No one was more worthy of being king than him.   

But before you can say anything to him, the maids brought you away to his room, complaining that you needed a change of clothes and a good bath. As they helped you strip out and scrubbed your neglected skin, they talked about how Seungcheol was furious when he learnt of your imprisonment. He insisted that you be released at once but he could not do anything as the royal guards would only take orders from the king. Stubborn to get you released no matter what, he sped up the coronation, which was due two weeks later and was crowned king just hours ago. His first order as ruler was that you be immediately released.  

You asked to be left alone for a bit, soaking yourself in the water after days now. Why did Seungcheol let you go? Did he not believe you tried to kill his father? Or did he love you so much that he was willing to forgive you for the attempt?

You couldn’t even ask him. He would not be free of the coronation festivities which apparently went on till sunrise and you didn’t have long before you had to return to the ocean – it was already day 99.  

Maybe it was better this way. You had your duties like he had his. Maybe if you left without giving him an explanation and without getting one, it would be easier for the love between the two of you to die. It had to die. The two of you belonged to two different worlds. There was no a happily ever after written for this story.   

You slid against the bath, submerging yourself into the waters, trying to breathe in peace again.  

But the nightmare had not ended. The voices were not gone.  

Kill the King.  

----------------------------------------------------------

When you walked out of the bathroom, Seungcheol was there.  

He was sitting on the edge of the bed, dressed in his usual simple clothes again. In fact, he was wearing the same white shirt as the first time you ever saw him. The irony was not lost on you. It was like fate was not tired of the joke after joke after joke it was playing. 

You walked in, asking him what he was doing away from the celebrations when you noticed what was in his hands. The dagger. Your dagger.  

It's been a while since I told you a story.  

He looked up, meeting your eye in the mirror, his finger dangerously dragging against the blade.  

Do you remember the legend of the sea?  

Why was the talking about this to you right now?  

There's more, he claimed, standing up, turning to you. In that blue sea of dangerous creatures and vicious beings also lived the most beautiful woman in the world.  

You can hear your heart thumping in your ear.  

One day, the woman of the waters found herself on land. She was sent with a mission.

You took a step back. How could he possibly know all this?

You may have forgotten everything Y/n. But I didn't. He walked up to you. You may remember only 3 months of our love, but I remember 10 years of it.

You didn't understand. You didn't understand at all.

The young woman had been interested in the Land and humans ever since she was a little girl. Even though the merfolk were clearly warned to stay away from humans and shallow waters were dangerous to swim in, she would always escape the barricades quietly, to see whatever little of Land she would.

Finally, when she was 14 years old, she discovered a little secret - a sea cave. It was the only place where the waters next to land were deep enough, where she could get close to the land without being in much danger. She would come there often just to look at the sand and the rocks but she never saw any humans.

Until one day, a young, 14 year old Prince, distraught at the loss of his mother had ventured into the forest all alone and found the cave.  

You remember Seungcheol telling you he moved to the cottage after the death of his mother when he was 14.

The price was also just as interested in the Sea as she was in land but unlike her, he did the stupid thing of entering the waters - he immediately started drowning.

That was the day she saved him the first time. Holding her breath to the point she couldn't anymore, she pulled him onto the sand before disappearing into the ocean. The last thing he remembered was seeing her most beautiful face.

After that the prince came everyday. Initially the young girl never showed herself. He knew she was there though, deeper in the waters, lurking silently. He would come every morning and just sit in the sand doing his assignments, glancing at the sea every once in a while and when the sun would start to set, he would return. Slowly, much to his anticipation and delight, she started coming up closer and closer to the surface until one day when he was 16, Seungcheol for the first time, put his hand in the water and touched hers.

It was magical, like nothing he ever felt before.

Then he started to get reckless again, trying to enter the waters, almost drowning too, but this time she held his hand and taught him to swim. Of the many hours he spent in the cave, a few minutes were always in the water, swimming by her side, and the rest were just watching her glide through the waves.

When he was 18, he created something extraordinary. He had always been a bit of a science man but after years of trial and error, he had finally made a device - a little mask of sorts that could help him breathe underwater, for about an hour or so. He didn't have to hold his breath anymore - he was able to spend longer under the sea, longer with her.

When he went to show it to her, she had discovered a little secret of her own - weeds. Not any kind but a very particular one that only grew in the Sea witches house. She apparently used to work for one, to learn magic, like all her other siblings did. There she had come across these very special plants that allowed merfolk to breathe on land.

That was the first time she stepped on land. The moment she did, she succumbed to her knees, throwing up water in the sand. Even the weed had its downsides, the most important one being that its affect only seemed to last an hour or so. But the hour she had with him on land and he had with her in the waters were more than enough - Their worlds were no longer barriers.

That went on for years, these secret meetings. Initially it was just sharing laughs, then dreams, then the thought of a whole life together. He taught her how to read and write their language, she drew him maps of different lands, far away in the sea. He taught her about science and she taught him about magic. His stories about the land animals fascinated her and her stories about the sea creatures terrified him.

When he was 20, he kissed her for the first time. When they were 22, they made love and when they were 24, around a 100 days ago, she told him she had to come to land for a mission.

It felt like someone had knocked the air out of your lungs. How was any of this possible?

She didn't say what her mission was, just that she had something to do and she needed him to help her. She would apparently arrive on land with all her memories gone and she needed him to guide her to find her way back. He didn't understand but she didn't have the time to tell him more. She just handed him a shell necklace and told him to give it to her when the time was right, it would help her figure things out.

So did you figure it out Y/n? He took you hand, placing the knife laced with his blood in it. Was your mission to kill my father?

You shook your head slowly, still processing all the information.

"It was to kill you."

The moment you heard your voice again in that bath, you felt like your life just left you. You thought the mission was completed - the king was dead. Then why were you still hearing it.... except you didn't complete the mission. You didn't kill the king, you didn't use the dagger.

Now the king was right in front of you. The man you just  discovered you had been in love with your whole life. The man who made you fall in love with him all over again. The man who you had to kill to stay alive.

But he didn't look even a little fazed.

The sky behind you was starting to get brighter. The sun was rising. The 100th day was nearly here.

"Its okay." He whispered, moving closer to you without an ounce of fear. "Do it."

How could he love you so much, enough to die for you?

You could feel the tears rolling down your cheeks. He gently wiped it away, shaking his head. You kissed the inside of his hand on your cheek, and then pulled him close, feeling his mouth against yours for what you knew was the last time.

As you whispered an apology, he assured you it was okay. That you were the most beautiful thing that ever happened to him. And there was no better way for him to go than you being the last thing he saw.

You took a step back.

"Till death do us apart."

And then another step.

"Till death do us apart."

And then another, till you reached the window overlooking the ocean, you back against it.

You smiled at him.

He was not the only one who loved you enough to die.

The sun had risen quite high by now. You were simply a silhouette against the light, an outline and soon a memory. Before Seungcheol could even realise what you were doing, you leaned back. He ran towards you, as you let yourself drop, only just missing his outstretched hand trying to pointlessly save you, taken away by the winds, taken away to the sea.

As the sun fully rose in the sky, the dagger in you hands landed in the ocean with a splash, sinking to the bottom slowly, disappearing from existence.

And around it was sea foam, finally reclaimed by the waters where it belonged, gently floating away in peace.

#seungcheol oneshot #seventeen seungcheol #seungcheol angst #seungcheol smut #seungcheol fluff #seungcheol x reader #choi seungcheol #seungcheol scenarios #seventeen series #seventeen one shot #s.coups #s.coups angst #s.coups smut #s.coups fluff

[goldenjupiterz]

bitter daydreams , sweet nightmares - choi seungcheol

PAIRING ➝ choi seungcheol x f!reader , mentions of other members of svt

GENRE ➝ angst

WORD COUNT ➝ 0.4k

WARNINGS ➝ not proofread , written with the intention to try and make you cry , reader passed away from a major car accident

SONG REC ➝ while writing , i listened to high school sweethearts by melanie martinez!

NOTES ➝ lowercase intended! someone was definitely cutting onions as i wrote this :( . if you want to be tagged in works like this, you can fill out my taglist form!

HE REMEMBERED THE FIRST TIME he saw you, clear as day, though it had been years ago. it hadn’t been anywhere special, just in a random food court at the mall. you were eating food, chatting fervently with friends, when you suddenly looked up at him and smiled. in that moment, it was like his heart stopped beating.

he remembered the first time he actually talked to you at a fanmeet. he didn’t know you were a fan and hadn’t expected you to be there, but it was a welcome surprise all the same.

he remembered the first time you two hung out together, outside of concerts and events. the two of you had gone to an amusement park together, and he’d quickly discovered your thrill of rides. he’d watched as you laughed and screamed on every drop, the wind whipping in your face.

he remembered when the rumors of you and him dating first started, spreading like wildfire among carats. soon enough, they were quickly shut down.

he remembered when he first started actually dating you, how happy the two of you had been together. your first date had just been going out for ice cream, which quickly turned into a competition of who finish their dessert first.

he remembered the first time he’d introduced you to the other members, and how quickly they’d taken a liking to you. it felt like you were meant to be there, with him.

he remembered the first time he’d brought you on tour with him, the way your eyes shined as you danced and sang along to the songs he and his group performed. 

he remembered the first time you’d moved in together and the excitement of being able to see you every day.

he remembered when he’d gotten the call from the hospital saying you’d been in a car accident.

he remembered the way he rushed over, gripping the steering wheel so tight that his knuckles turned white, hoping you were okay.

he remembered how he’d sat by your bedside, willing you to finally wake up.

he remembered the way his heart dropped when the doctor said you weren’t going to make it.

he remembered the first time he’d waken up alone, reaching out for you when you weren’t there.

he remembered when he attended your funeral, trying to hold himself together when all he felt was broken inside.

he remembered the countless nightmares he had. nightmares that you were alive, that were only nightmares because he had to wake up in the real world at some point.

he remembered the daydreams he had, wondering what it would have been like if you were still alive. would you have gotten married? he didn’t know. 

he hated all the daydreams he had, but he loved the nightmares because it’s as if you never died.

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#k labels #angst #seventeen #svt #choi seungcheol #seungcheol #s.coups #svt angst #seventeen angst #seventeen imagine #seungcheol x reader #s.coups angst #s.coups x reader #goldenjupiterz

[duhnova]

brightest star in the night sky | choi seungcheol

synopsis. freshly widowed seungcheol has to tell his daughter that mommy isn’t coming back but she can always find her amongst the night sky. 

word count: 743

warning(s): angst, mentions of a funeral, set in a graveyard/ at a grave sight, loss of a parent (mother), mentions of death, crying. - don’t mind grammatical errors and typos (i quite literally wrote this will crying) 

this was very self indulgent for me as i got hit with a big wave of grief over the loss of my mother.. i lost her a long time ago so it’s nothing new but some nights are hard, especially when the stars are extra bright.. anyways i hope that others can find some solace in this work and just remember that you’re not alone and it’s ok to still grieve years (and decades) later - there is no bounds to getting over the loss of someone you love and care about.   

“papa.” the little girl squeezes seungcheols finger. 

“yes baby?” he tries to clear his throat as much as possible after sobbing his heart out. 

“is mommy coming back?” she looks down at the freshly dug patch of dirt, the reality and weight of what just happened not fully comprehending in her four year old mind.

“i don’t think so.” seungcheol sniffs, his eyes burning again with tears. 

“why not?” his daughter finally looks up at him. 

“well.. because she’s taking a nap.” he looks at her with his bloodshot eyes. 

“but you wake up from naps silly!” she smiles up at him, giggling quietly at what she assumed was a joke. 

“think of this one as a forever nap.” he gives her a pained smile. 

“what’s a forever nap?” her head tilts, giving her the air of an innocent puppy. 

“it’s when you don’t wake up.” seungcheol rips his eyes off his daughter to stare at where his wife laid six feet under: 

“so.. mommy is never waking up “ her voice trails off a little, something clicking in her mind that she’d never see her mother again. 

“i’m sorry baby.” his voice cracks as he swallows back a sob. 

“but why? why isn’t she waking up? what happened to her?” she sounded so confused, and hurt - about what? she couldn’t put her finger on it but all these unknown emotions were making tears fill up her eyes. 

“i don’t.. i don’t know how to answer any of your questions baby i’m sorry.” he finally broke, an onslaught of tears spilling out his eyes as he bites his lip to keep back all the ugly sounds he wanted to make. 

“i want mommy to wake up daddy.” a tear finally fell from her eyes. 

“i do too.” his breathing was shaky as forces out coherent answers. 

“why won’t she wake up? does she not want to be with us anymore?”her little voice shakes as more tears begin to fall. 

“no.. no baby, that’s not it.. mommy just wasn't feeling well and so she had to go away so she wouldn’t be in pain anymore.” seungcheol picked up his crying daughter, allowing her to cling to him as she expelled all her emotions. 

“but i.. want her..  to be here.. with us.” she hiccups in between her sobs, her little hands fisting in the fabric of his jacket as she tries to calm herself down enough to speak.  

“she’ll always be here baby, everywhere you go she’s there.. look in the flowers that bloom and the sun that shines.” he pushes her hair out of her face before wiping at the tears that wouldn’t stop. 

“what about.. at night?” she takes in a deep breath, finding comfort in the way seungcheol began to gently sway them, his own tears slowing down as he watched his daughter (that looked so much like her mother) work on managing her own. 

“she’s always there at night. just look up into the sky and the brightest star you see is her looking over you.” he sniffles before giving her a gentle smile. 

“if it twinkles, is that her saying hello?” she wipes at some of the tears that were working on staining his cheeks causing him to laugh quietly (and a little brokenly). 

“i think it is.” he smiles through his pain, his eyes still glassy from the tears that didn’t escape yet. 

“i’ll make sure to wave back at her then.” she snuggles quietly before leaning down to wipe her nose on his jacket, a louder and more solid laugh leaving him. 

“i think she’ll like that.” he wraps one of his arms around her back to hold her in a tight hug, whispering about how he’ll wave with her. 

“can we go to mommy’s favorite restaurant for dinner tonight?” she whispers into his shoulder.

“of course we can, baby.” seungcheol fights back another wave of tears as he wills himself to finally walk away from the grave. “we can go to all her favorite places if you want.” 

“i’d like that,” she mumbles before peeking over his shoulder, watching the dirt patch get smaller in the distance. “bye mommy.. see you tonight.” she whispers into the wind, waving her little hand gently. seungcheol could feel his body shake a little as he swallowed back his tears, promising himself he’d stay strong for the rest of the night so that his daughter had someone to rely on. 

#svthub #scoups angst #s.coups angst #seungcheol angst #seventeen angst #scoups imagines #s.coups imagines #seungcheol imagines #seventeen imagines

[dropsofletters]

candied glass.

summary: when visiting amsterdam during the winter, seungcheol accidentally lets a mirror fall to the floor but when picking up the broken pieces from the floor, he realizes one of them reflects the face of a woman. saddened, beautiful, yet heartbreaking to look at.

the myth says that whoever sees another person’s face on the magic mirror has unfinished history with a past lover and seungcheol really shouldn’t be interested, but that pair of saddened eyes plead to let him know exactly what he did wrong.

how will he figure out what happened in his past life?

title: candied glass pairing: choi seungcheol x reader genre: 1900’s!au ; parallel timelines!au ; soulmate!au ; office worker!au ; period piece!au ; arranged marriage!au ; the lake house!au type: angst ; fluff ; suggestive ; drama word count: 9k words approx. note: this is part of my ‘when we were young’ series. if you want to read any of the other standalones, here’s the masterlist.

Neither one nor twenty coffee mugs would be able to heat up the tips of Seungcheol’s fingers.

His tips are burning red by the time he slips into the gift shop. Chan could convince anyone that the reason this trip to Amsterdam went unplanned was thanks to him, but that is far from the case. He planned, alright? It was not his fault that Chan had them locked up for a big chunk of their getaway because he had caught the flu and had decided to—coincidentally—drink from the same cocoa cup that Seungcheol had been sipping on during Monday.

Either way, just on a Tuesday, he got to do precisely what he wanted. Get lost in between the speckles of dust that are snowflakes—aging portions of the universe, with its white hairs and its downfalls. He rubs the knitted fabric of the gloves his mother had given him in between his knuckles before sparing a glance around the shop. He could grab a few things for his family now that he is here.

Navy blue beanie moved to the side; the peaceful wind plays with the strands of his black hair. He concentrates on the woods and the dance of the Christmas lights that are hung up on January. His vision is blurred by the history books and the intricate, detailed postcards that could be filled with enormous messages if his words weren’t quite as…thoughtless at times. Seungcheol wouldn’t count his abilities for talking as his best trait.

The windows are old enough to creak with the mere wind, but the owner—could be the worker, he is not sure—does not pay attention to it. The old woman with the thick red scarf is too lost on the romance book underneath her thick-brimmed glasses, with her nose practically pressed to it without much of a thought about how those writers are absolute liars.

Yes, the reason Seungcheol came to this vacation was because he had no one to spend his Christmas time with and Chan was also the only person who never gets to December with a relationship. Seungcheol’s ended far too quickly after three months, and Chan’s attachment to people lasts…as long as a kiss with him must do.

While lurking through small shelves with decorations and mementos that don’t grab much of his attention, he arrives to the wooden surface that holds the most beautiful snow globes he had seen. Inside the polished and clean glass hide intricate personifications of houses and people, perhaps portions of the nearest citizens that desired to leave an imprint for the tourists. Though, the more he looks, the more entranced he is by a globe.

He pulls the scarf around his neck and unties it the slightest, constricted by the mere image of the couple inside the globe. Never had he seen such melancholy in one of these gifts. Personified in its tiniest version are a couple; plastered in their most heartbroken state. The man of the couple has tears drawn under his eyelids, still holding his lover into a dance, bending her waist to his will as his legs part to continue the next step. Seungcheol can only detail her when he grabs the globe, shaking it to see the faux snowflakes twirl, but she is no less tear-jerking.

A long white dress covers the figurine, but it doesn’t look like a wedding dress. Almost like a ghost’s outfit, he would consider it. Her eyes are trained on the man’s, but instead of crying, she has a frown on her features, with a face of acceptance and strength.

Somehow, he wants to buy it…even if he is not a man of angst.

The material becomes slippery between his fingers out of nowhere. What had been once dry skin turns oily, dragging the ball in between his fingers and then, letting it fall to the floor. His movements are quick when seeing the glass shatter, forgetting the fragility of skin when kneeling down and grabbing the first piece he sees in between his fingers.

The biggest piece welcomes him with the unimaginable.

The clear glass shows a woman writing on a paper. An address that he recalls quite perfectly. Lover Avenue, #173.

It sounds oddly familiar, but that is not what frightens Seungcheol.

How the fuck did he see that?

“Oh, sir, let me help you.” The old woman shushes him while holding a broom in her hold, brushing away the remaining pieces of the couple that had once lived in their sadness.

“I’m sorry.” Seungcheol sputters, tightening his knitted scarf as if that would be able to hide his pink dusted cheeks.

“No worries.” The owner—or worker, but he’s assuming—smiles at him with all wrinkles and sweetness before gasping a bit. Her eyes inspect his features, though never stopping her ministrations. “Quite the mystery, actually. You look like the figure inside the snow globe. The guy, you know?”

He can’t help but frown. “I didn’t see it.” He lies through his teeth, hiding his hands in his coat’s pockets. His feet bring him back and forth, jumping on his spot. “…I did see a woman on the glass. Is it reflective?”

That goddamned smile. It doesn’t disappear, only getting more cat-like. The scent of spices emanates from the old lady. “Not at all.” His spine straightens, widening his eyes and earning sweet, raspy laughter. “There is a myth around here, young man.”

“A myth?” He questions, shaking his head. “Don’t believe in those, actually.”

“For such a loving face, you should believe more in magic, sir.” She comments, brushing the last few bits of glass before patting the broom on the floor. “The myth goes, and you haven’t asked this old lady but I’ll still continue, that if you see a reflection on a broken piece of glass…your soulmate and yourself got terribly separated in a past life.” One of her hands waves in the air, showcasing enormous amounts of rings. “Like…the myth that goes around the lines of every mole on one’s skin meaning kisses from our soulmate.”

Seungcheol chuckles, shaking his head. “Must have been the jet-lag.” He completes, grabbing four snowflake globes in his fingers and placing it inside a bag carefully. “I’ll take those…and I’m sorry for the inconvenience.”

She eyes him from under her glasses, laughing at him. “That hard headed nature must be what caused the break-up.” She whispers, making Seungcheol lick his lips and get ready to bite-back an answer. Yet, she interrupts him. “Alright, let’s go pay.”

Though, even when he goes back to where Chan was waiting for him—and talking to a group of tourists along the way—, he could only think of the cursive letter that read.

Lover Avenue, #173.

Lover Avenue.

Where is it?

###

October, 1903.

On the windowsill sat the promise of the word ‘never’.

Every thread of his suit reminded her of kisses she would never be able to share out loud. From that night on, she would only be a someone’s lady. Not his. The engraving memory of his fingertips raking through the back of her nape as he promised more than what he could have ever mustered burned from her thorax. One leg crossed over the other, she smelled the drink that had been served for her. Her mother-in-law-to-be and her own mother spoke between bites of pastries and sips of rich wine. They did not give a damn about the invitees, the music that had no one dancing, and the gossiping that filled the air.

The groom-to-be had yet to appear.

She knew little about him, in retrospect. What a wild world it was that in three weeks from then, as if in a rush to hide from the imminent sicknesses that took over the citizens, she would have married someone that she barely acknowledged. And it was not the man in front of her—not Haneul, whom she had met two summers ago in a trip to his family’s now dead farm, where they had held hands and whispered promises to the moonlight. He said he’d settle down one day, but she was settled before he could find her.

Mr. Choi should have been there. That way, she would have an excuse to look somewhere else, not sip on her drink and try not to plaster a smile on her features when Haneul ran a hand through his thick, long locks. His lips parted in a mocking smile, inspecting the dress that had been put on her body from head to toe. The corset dug on her stomach when she took a breath out, playing with the pompous sleeves of her white dress.

Mother had said the sooner she looked like a bride, the better. The hat on her head covered part of her face quite like a veil would, but at this point, she was a stood-up bride. Two hours ago, the eventful dinner had started and plates had been served before he even decided to show up.

She did not know she was looking away until she heard someone’s footsteps approaching her. A sigh followed the person that sat down next to her and by the scent of wood alone, accompanied by slim, long legs, she knew who it was.

“Quite the eccentricity, your man.” Haneul added in that innocent tone that represented him. It was soft and lukewarm, like the rays of sunshine that would bathe them when falling asleep on the grass in his farm. He had gotten skinnier, she noted when turning to him, the hollows of his cheeks and the length of his hair speaking of disinterest. “Leaving his fiancé hanging like that.”

Not a word had been spoken about the arrangement of the marriage. To the land—because, that is what her mother had dreamed of from the moment she had a daughter—, she had met Choi Seungcheol in his latest trip and he had fallen like a madman. Wished upon marriage from the moment their eyes met. Little did anyone know that what she knew about her husband-to-be was what everyone else knew.

Choi Seungcheol, better known for his articles that he had written about the history of the land. Everyone knew him as the man who had information about everyone. They said that one glance from him meant that he had already read you like a book. Though, she doubted he ever looked at her past a brief presentation and an empty-handed promise of marriage.

“He must be upstairs.” After all, this was the Choi’s house. Not quite the biggest elegance, but after Haneul’s family lost the farm, her own had not been able to keep up with businesses. She would be the first one to marry for the sake of money, perhaps even accommodation.

“And why is he not here?” Haneul question and she closed her eyes, as if not to study his delicate eyes and his dry, plump lips.

“If I could read a man’s mind, I would not be a mere wife, Haneul. I would lead ships or men.”

He chuckled at her antics, toying with the collar of the same suit he always wore. Not a man of money, he was. “Why did you invite me?” His voice darkened, and when she opened her eyes, his gaze was, too.

“Excuse me?”

He lowered his voice so only the two of them could hear, repeating: “If you know how I felt about you, why did you invite me to your engagement dinner?”

Felt. A verb in past should not hurt. If he mentioned it, his heart must be palpitating with the same force that it did hers. She masked a sigh with a sip of her drink, staring at the groups of people and avoiding the curious glances. The land must eat her mother’s stories, talkative as ever, but they were not stupid. She roamed these streets while in love with Haneul, ignoring the imminent reality that their future depended on business. Not on romance.

“Well, you are allowed to leave if you please.” She straightened her back, standing up and fluffing out the long skirt of her dress. Her chin jutted forward, high up to stop tears from brimming her eyes when looking at him. “But if you are here to reiterate that you feel nothing for me anymore, then pass me down on the brief conversation.”

His features softened, quite like they did whenever they had a talk about the future and Haneul never seemed to have it figured it out, but just as he was about to speak, the bustle of voices grew bigger. She turned to where the invitees were looking, watching Seungcheol go down the set of stairs while rubbing one of his eyes. Looking appropriate…but with a lingering sense of sleepiness that could be sensed from afar.

A plaid long coat sported its clear folds as he went down the last set of stairs and instead of directing himself to his wife, he went over to the kitchen. Ignoring the music, the people, the clear sign of their engagement being shown to the world.

She smiled, trying to fight the impotence back. Giving a curt nod to the invitees, she excused herself silently and followed after him.

People could be hypnotized by Seungcheol’s words on paper, but his actions spoke louder than he ever did.

The kitchen was simple in scales of gray and dark green. The music grew duller after the doors closed, now interrupted by the boiling of water and the flickering of papers as he lurked for a teabag. She had to see him from up-close just to convince herself that she was wrong. He could not have been sleeping throughout their engagement dinner.

His small, rounded chin was tightened as he thought deeply. His big lips, equals to his expressive eyes, did not look at her even when she was wearing the best dress she had worn yet. His dark hair fell in a few strands after, perhaps, tossing on the bed, but he usually kept it sleeked back. Only when she cleared her throat did he look at her and it seemed to down on him then.

He had a fiancé for a week by then.

He had a dinner to attend to.

He had chosen her, and she had chosen him, or so the word had it.

“For someone so respected around the land, one would expect you to be awake to attend to these…pleasantries.” She uttered, crossing her arms across her chest. Seungcheol had his guard down at first, she could tell, fixing the edge of his button down—half peaking out of his pants—and sighing deeply.

”I was working on an article. I lost track of time.” He announced, ready to excuse himself, but this was a rampant rage that built from within her. Not because she was his fiancé, but because she had to be the wife of a man that did not even look at her when apologizing.

Is it an apology, even?

“If we are going to keep this going, Mr. Choi, we need responsibilities.” She uttered. “I am a woman, yes, but I will not withstand any kind of disrespect from you. You will be my husband, but I will be your wife…and if I have to smile and pretend that I would not have preferred to be somewhere else for you, at least, be by my side while I do so.”

The water kept boiling when he finally connected his gaze to hers. Perhaps, it represented the rising distaste in his gaze.

“I just apologized.”

“I did not hear an apology, Mr. Choi.”

He smiled at her words, pressing his hip to the counter and tossing the first tea bag he saw on the boiling water. She did not break her eyes from him, seeing the brown shade get darker. “I see,” Seungcheol whispered. “I know for a fact that I am not the man you wanted to marry. Do not worry, I do not expect for us to perform the role of the perfect couple. I needed a wife and you needed someone other than Haneul to be your husband. We have established that.”

Shivers settled on the highest portion of her spine. She shook her head. “You have mistaken me for someone else.”

“I have not.” He shook his head. “Your relationship with Haneul has been word of mouth since two years ago and I know it is difficult for you, but just like I do not plan to disrespect you any longer, I expect the same from you.” He reiterated. “So, it is settled. We let this slide, because you are ogling your lover and I happened to fall asleep.”

She could have scoffed. God, she desired to, more than anything. Instead, she bit on her lip.

“Why did you need a wife?” Anger blossomed from her words. Impotence, she would call it. He continued moving the teabag inside the water, calm as ever. “Why did you need a wife, I said?” She repeated, pointing every word.

Seungcheol did not respond, serving two mugs of tea before sipping on his. “I hope you like the tea.”

With that, he left the kitchen. The scent of hibiscus flower lingered on her nostrils, reminding her that this was her favorite flavor.

Yet, Choi Seungcheol made it taste bitter.

###

The wedding was finished with too many preparations and a kiss on the cheek that had her feeling pathetic.

Not that she expected a kiss on the lips. God forbid she ever received that kind of attention from Mr. Choi, but as she stood behind him, with him seated on a chair and their eyes settled on the painter in front of them, she did feel a little bit bad. Their house would be covered by the enormous painting of a couple that did not bleed out any sign of love and she’d have to live with the lie for centuries. Her grandchildren would coo at the old times, the antiqueness of the gentlemanly nature of being distant in an ode to not love.

It was Seungcheol’s idea. To have different rooms and only meet for brief breakfasts before he went off to his office and disappeared through the words he wrote. After breakfast, she would grab the nearest copy of the newspaper he had created and through his words, she feigned knowing him. Choi Seungcheol, coming from a well-studied family who had done his best to earn his riches and his expertise through his commentary of normality and war. To not touch, only if it was necessary. To let things be for a while.

Fei, the painter, had her entire hair tossed in a tall updo that kept her distracted as she rested one hand on Seungcheol’s sturdy shoulder. His dark suit was a nice contrast to the emerald green of her dress and, as per these days, she wore a hat that covered most of her face. She tilted her chin downwards, as if hiding would do her any good. Maybe, her grandchildren would not recognize the unhappiness in her face if she did this. Perhaps, the day would never come that Seungcheol would want to touch her.

Her eyes trailed downwards, seeing Seungcheol in his most natural light. Seated in the middle of their—inherently, his—dining room. His legs were well parted, knuckles interlocked between his thick thighs, his eyes void of any kind of emotion as he quirked the corners of his lips in a faint smile.

Had she ever seen him smile?

“I cannot do this.” Fei, exasperated as ever, looked up from the canvas and puckered up her lips. “You look like two strangers and I will not stand for this kind of romantic painting.”

Because they were strangers, she wanted to say. Even Mr. Choi’s shoulder was foreign to the touch, given that the only words they had shared were ‘I do’ and pleasantries. She knew he liked tea, that his patience ran low, that he was a smart leader and studious man. He had a handful of writers under his watch and he gave them grand attention, even preparing gifts for them when their birthdays came around. But it had been a month and his interest for her was as bright as the dulled sun of that day.

“I think we show our love quite well, right, my love?” She tried to counterpart, but Seungcheol did not look at her, staring forward and clearing his throat.

“What do you have in mind, Fei?”

She must have seen all kinds of shades of red behind her eyelids at that time. He never listened to her, and this was just proof. Fei clasped her hands together in happiness, standing up to be seen even with her short height.

“Maybe…half seated on your lap, with her arm around your shoulder?”

“That is—” She gasped, taking off her hat to show her unhappiness. “Scandalous.”

Fei fluttered her short eyelashes. “One could see some kind of change around these lands.”

Seungcheol looked at her, sighing deeply before saying. “Any other idea, Fei?”

“You know her better than I do.” Fei encountered, seemingly thinking of the next pose. “I do not know. Show me how you naturally are around her.”

No one knew that they had never touched and she froze the moment Seungcheol stood up. On the daily, Seungcheol was indifferent—it felt like he never wanted to be married, or that he was interviewing her and bored of her answers. Nonetheless, he always listened. Could remember her every word from scratch if asked.

He moved closer and her breath hitched. Mr. Choi, when seen this closely, had a natural elegance that was accompanied by a dulcet face. Everything was rounded, not too many harsh lines, speaking of delicacy. His eyes glistened, though they were serious, and surprise came over her when his hand expanded on her waist, heat flourishing from under the constricting corset and through the threaded lace that kept it together, before he twirled her around.

His chest became a resting wall. Sturdy, warm, with each muscle contorting deeper than the last. For someone who spent most of his days writing, he had some strength to him. Perhaps, he had his own vision of war within him. The complexity that came with him unhinged and blossoming through his physique. Each digit spread on her stomach, his hair caressing her nape when he lowered his thick lips to her ear.

“Yes! That was what I was talking about! Scandal, love, lust—!” She got lost on the speech that Fei was outing to the world, granted by the softness of Seungcheol’s voice.

“I—I am sorry.” For the kind of man that he was, Mr. Choi held a bit of insecurity in his voice. The one his writing lacked. His breath ghosted against her skin and as per Fei’s request, she had to move.

“You can touch him! No husband dislikes a bit of loving.”

Swallowing thickly, she tilted her hand backwards, contorting her body to the side the slightest to look into his eyes and press her palm to his thick hair. Their eyes connected and she whispered:

“What for?”

“Mhm?” He hummed, their private conversation showcased as a piece of love for the artist.

“Your apologies. What are they for?”

“For such closeness.” Oh, of course. He would not apologize for his indifference and lack of interest. She let the tips of her fingers play with a few strands of his hair and this got his blinking to slow down. “I am aware that I am not the man you wish was holding you like this.”

Haneul. Whenever she could, she would meet up with him. With a few friends, of course, for coffee and sips of gossip, but never alone. She was a married wife, after all. The lingering glances were there, but she kept loyal to her, albeit arranged, marriage.

“You are my husband.” She confessed. “I have to get used to you being like this with me.”

His eyes lowered to her nose, then her lips, and soon after, he was looking at her again. “How bitter. Having to get used to each other.”

“Most marriages are like that.”

“Indeed.” Seungcheol retorted. “But I imagine you wanted something else.”

“If you knew whom I wanted was not you, why did you ask for my hand in marriage?” She had not heard from Seungcheol before. Damn it, she did not even know his family knew about hers, but while so close, each breath of his pushing a breath of her own, she was curious.

“I know a lot about the landers. More than they know themselves.” He corresponded. “And I knew about you before you even thought about me.”

She grasped his hair, sighing. “Why choose me? I am sure you have other women interested in you.”

“That would not be a lie.” She swore she saw a hint of a smile on his face and that cheekiness should not come from a husband, but…they were not a real couple to start with. “The answer, however, should stay for another time. Perhaps, for the moment the town stops talking about my wife going around with her ex-lover.”

Those words electrified her and she almost pulled away, had it not been for his hand on her stomach.

“Mr. Choi—” Excuses were not what she was looking for, but an answer instead. If he knew, if he stayed, then… “Why me?”

He shrugged. “Why did you accept?”

For the money. “Did I have a choice?”

“You always have one.” Seungcheol mumbled. “With me, you will always have a merit, a word, and a choice.”

What a sad thing it was that they were not each other’s choice.

### 

The fourth month of their marriage came with their very first event. The launch of a new image for Seungcheol’s newspaper, that was.

Granted, she loved the atmosphere that she had been able to organize alongside Seungcheol’s mother. In a little secluded ballroom of the land, they had brought a fantasy book to life. Swivels of plants that hung from ceilings caressed the ambience with red and pink flowers, matching the dress she had wore that night. Pieces of burnt paper were pressed under plates of food, with quotes from her favorite articles by Seungcheol. Some read them, some used them as napkins, but her love for literature could be felt as such.

Roses paired the knots of her braids as she moved in the romantic red dress that she had gotten done for the event. It was a little tighter on the chest, pushing her breasts upwards and giving her more attention than what she had ever received and a long, fluffy skirt that follow after her every step. Not her husband, of course, they were in different sides of the room at this moment.

She pursed her lips when bringing her glass up to her lips and she saw his, meanwhile. One would be lying if they dared say that Mr. Choi was not an attractive man. Soft features and strong hands. In this coldness as winter arrived, she dared say having a hand to hold hers would not be badly received. Though, it was not a lie that her heart still perked at the idea of Haneul and that her marriage was distant, quite conversational and formal to say the least.

He wore a rose where his handkerchief was to match her, and it would have been a grand message to the invitees if it was not for Seungcheol’s newest acquisition in his team.

Jing was a studied woman a few years older than her. A widow with too much beauty in her hold that had forgotten about the dark dresses and laughed loudly at what Seungcheol had just said. Her hand plastered on her husband’s pocket, covering the rose that kept them united and looked into his eyes as if she was the one by his side. Seungcheol did not move, not to pull her closer or move her away, but he could not be oblivious.

She sipped on her drink.

It was fair. Seungcheol could like someone with the same force as she liked Haneul.

However, his gaze did not move towards her at any moment. He did not see the swivel of her skirt or the curves that were highlighted. He was occupied with Jing’s deep conversation and what the other members of his team said. Even one of his editors, Chan, looked at her and gave her a curt nod as a greeting, but Mr. Choi’s interested left much to desire for.

In this party that she had prepared for him, she had barely received a gaze from him. And sure, they were not a real couple. Not even close. But a look could have been nice. A touch of his hand on her shoulder, a ‘thank you’. Anything but this silence that comes whenever they are not having breakfast.

Scoffing, she put the drink down, straightening her shoulders and moving towards the garden without letting anyone see her angered. She breathed in and out deeply until she was outside, only so she could feel the bone-shattering cold touch her chest and the moon cast its enormous light at her.

The night was dark. Lonely. Different.

It was hard to believe she was married and in these moments, she wondered if it would have been the same with Haneul. If happiness was in being poor. Then, came the silence that both of her halves shared. Haneul had not seen her the past month—skipping coffee and not replying to her letters, and Seungcheol had his own way of being indifferent. Maybe, dressing up in a huge dress and pretending to have it all together, to have a voice that could have been heard, was her grandest mistake.

As a woman, she had always been very strong with her beliefs, but in this time of history, does it even matter?

Minutes passed by until she was trembling with coldness. What she did not expect was to hear footsteps against the grass and to hear a voice calling out for her name.

“People have started asking about you.”

Of course, that was what Mr. Choi cared about. She turned around, frowning at him and biting back with the wit that characterized her. “Oh, I imagine you are not one of them, then. Granted that you were very pleased letting yourself be touched by your lover.”

Seungcheol’s face contorted in a frown that matched hers. The littlest thing they ever had in common. “Excuse me?”

“Excused.” She answered, crossing her arms across her chest. His eyes roamed her body as he got closer, settling on her eyes with a look that she could not read. “Or rather, not. Mr. Choi, I think it is rather respectful to hide illicit affairs from the eyes of a wife, is it not?”

“What affair?” He questioned, exasperated. There, she had touched his patience and poked at it, and she loved to get a reaction out of him.

“Do not play dumb.”

“If there is anything I do not do, is play dumb.”

She shook her head, letting her…whatever this feeling was, win. “Jing, your new journalist. She was touching up on you and you seemed to like it.”

Seungcheol pressed a hand on the little iron table next to her, making him seem grand. Big. Taking up too much space with his scent and the lingering twinkle in his eyes.

“Is that jealousy I hear in your voice, love?”

Love. He had never called her that. Not even in front of people. Calling him Mr. Choi came naturally to her, so she always tried to pull a pet name whenever they had company. But with him, he always used her name. Curt. Straight to the point. Never too heartfelt.

No. This could not be jealousy, so she shook her head.

“I just expect loyalty.”

“And that, you have.” Seungcheol replied. “But you did not tell me to be careful around people first. You told me I was letting myself be touched.”

“You were.”

“And were you not?” He asked, moving closer. “If I am recalling correctly, the only man that has ever touched you is not me. And you still love him as much as you did before you met me.”

She sighed, shaking her head. “He has not touched me ever since I met you.” The reason why she had to excuse herself was unknown to her, but she did. “…And you do not touch me because you are repulsed by me. You have never asked, never tried, never even spoke about ever having a family—”

Seungcheol blinked in confusion, his free hand coming up to hold her chin and unite their gazes. When had she looked down. “I am not repulsed by you.”

“I know you like Jing—”

“As a journalist in my newspaper.” Seungcheol completed, though, his thumb hooked on her bottom lip and when he got closer, she almost thought he was going to kiss her. “Do you think I would have married you if I did not think you were the most interesting woman to hear and look at in the entire land?”

The cold left at that moment, replaced with imminent heat and a tingle that roamed the center of her body up and down.

“I liked you as a wife for your strength, your wit, and what I knew about you just from hearing about you. Looking at you…” He chuckled lowly. “Was just an addition, I guess.”

Touch me, she wanted to say.

But she could not break the wall that separated them.

Seungcheol took off his coat, placing it on top of her shoulders and letting go of her in one brief motion.

“You will freeze to death. Your lips have lost their color. Let’s head inside.”

How did he know that her lips had lost their color?

### 

The sixth month of their marriage came with a shared dinner, but no amount of time with Seungcheol could have stopped her from the nightmare that bustled around her head.

She awakened with sweat pooling at her chest and hairline, the clear image of Seungcheol’s body laying on a side of her bed lifeless poking at her eyelids each time she blinked. Her ragged breathing did not stop her from dragging the covers away from her body and tying a robe around her frame.

The hall that separates Seungcheol’s room from hers felt endless and she did not even take the time to knock when she burst into the room. Well over midnight and Seungcheol was not there. He did not often venture into the night, but it seemed like he picked the worst time to disappear from the house, for he was not in the kitchen, the living room or the dining room.

Something could have happened to him, she plotted. Her mind repeated the same image over and over again, constricting her lungs and making her step out of the house with the thinnest of clothing. She moved through the streets with a rapid stance, reaching and lurking for his office only a few blocks away from their house.

Her body was drenched from head to toe by the time she reached the office. Much to the delight of the universe and her soul, the door was opened. She pushed after twisting the doorknob, relishing on the warmth of the golden office, taking in the scent of him and moving over to the place in which she expected him to be.

Seungcheol could have been a dream the moment she saw him. He hunched on his desk, letting a lamp guide his vision as he read through a book. He was calm as ever, alive for Christ’s sake, wearing his own navy pajamas and running a hand through his dark locks as if to ease himself into a sleepy state. He looked up when she closed the door behind her and he was on his feet in the matter of seconds.

“What happened?” He questioned, moving over to her and inspecting her arms first, as if checking for wounds.

“Do not ever leave the house like that again.” She threatened, bunching her wet fists and connecting them to his chest. Her hair pricked the floor with each drop of rainwater that fell into the wood. “I…I thought you were dead.”

Seungcheol frowned at her words. “Why? Did anything happen?”

“I had a dream…and…” Now that she thought about it, for such a separated marriage, it was rather ridiculous that she was saying this out loud. “And you died in it, so I went to see if you were alright and you were not around.”

His thick lips moved with a smile and he shook his head as he dragged her inside the office, with one hand on her shoulder. “Let me see if I have some clothes to help you dry up.” He started, though he continued to speak. “I come here at night when I am not feeling too well…emotionally.”

He gestured for her to come closer when he opened a drawer and took a button down out. Staring at him, he started to dry her shoulders down to her arms, softly, burning even through the fabric.

“Anything you want to talk about?”

“I, uh…” Seungcheol kneeled to dry her hands and between her digits, sighing deeply and heating her skin with the mere wind coming from him. “I wrote an article about a little kid in the land once. When I was just starting. Her family knew she had a sickness but they could not quite pinpoint what it was. I was…asking for help through my words, after all, she was only two months old.” He stopped, placing the fabric in her palm. “No one read it. I was too…unpopular, I guess. She died a month after that, at only three months old. So, from time to time, I remember her.”

She had heard about the story. Three years after she passed away, people started to pay attention to the case when other kids started to get sick.

“I am sorry.”

“There is nothing to be sorry about.” Seungcheol stood up, resting his weight on the edge of his desk as he looked at her get dried up. “I promised myself that time that I would not let a single person in this land go unknown, so I have made it my job to study people and their lives.”

She smiled at him, softly. “Including me.”

His cheeks tinted, and he rose his shoulders. “Could be.”

“You never told me…” Tossing his shirt to the side, still damp in rainwater, she moved closer to him until they were to face. “Considering you have always said you knew more about me than I believed when we got married, why you picked me.”

Seungcheol inspected her features, squinting in the process. “I told you once that you were the most interesting woman. Hence, I wanted to marry you.”

“But why me? Why…why was I interesting?”

Mr. Choi pressed his lips together and then, he smiled. “I knew about you from Haneul’s brother, actually.” He gestured. “That was the first time I heard about you. He was talking about his brother having an affair with a woman and that was when I got to know you. After, I realized how the land had put you down with such grand titles just for being with a man. A man who did not deserve you, on top of that.”

She had stopped writing to Haneul, altogether, and perhaps, that love that had once burned bright dulled into a mere memory. Though, she could not say she did not miss the friend she used to have.

“He did not deserve me?”

“Even when he had it all with you, he never wanted to make your relationship serious. Everyone in the land talked so lowly about you, as if you were one of those women who stood in corners and sold their bodies just for loving someone. As a man, he should have spoken.” He stopped. “Then, I realized that you spoke for yourself and that…made me start to like you.”

“Like me?” She whispered, only to have Seungcheol looking at her with softness in his gaze.

“Oh, come on.”

“What?”

“Do not tell me you have never thought of me liking you.”

She shook her head. “I thought you deemed me as nothing more than your wife by title.”

“And that you are, but I asked you to be my wife for a reason.” Seungcheol confessed, looking up at the ceiling soon after with a smile playing on his face. “Though, it is quite difficult to notice when you are not looking at me most of the time.”

“I see you.” Her hand grasped his cheek, pulling his face down until their eyes met. Until then she had not realized that she was between his thighs, bodies so close anyone would believe that their romance was real. Though, for a moment it felt like it—she was glad that he was alive, that she could see him from up-close and that she was attractive in his gaze. “I have only seen you for a while.”

She learned that night that Seungcheol was passionate. Impulsive, maybe. With the kind of sentimentalism that had him dragging her closer by a sturdy touch on the small of her back. His lips touched hers, firstly with some kind of insecurity, but her eyes closed at the mere touch of his mouth. Soft, buttery, tense against her touch until she spread her hands on his thighs and let herself ravish him. Fall for a man that was not Haneul. Feel and explode for her husband.

He lingered, the clashing of mouths resounding with delicacy and slowness. She tilted her head to the side, deepening the kiss and letting her voice be trapped in his mouth. Not that she would have anything to say, because she was learning what she needed to know about him in a kiss. It felt as if he had seen her for far longer than she had watched him, the genuine nature of his touch shown in the spread of his digits and the soft mumble of her name in between exchanges.

“Do not call me that.” She whispered, the pattering of rain not distracting enough to forget the redness of his lips.

“What should I call you?”

“My love.”

And while kissing him, she did not hear anything else but that.

### 

If she would have ever been told that she’d wake up next to whom she called Mr. Choi everyday for the past two months, she would have screamed at whoever she was talking to.

With one hand spread on his abdomen, she watched his sleeping face tilted to the side, lips half-parted, eyes well-closed and drifted to dream land. Seungcheol’s room—or rather, the couple’s room now—was much more different from hers. It usually smelled of dusty books and ink, with his typewriter not too far away and his desk filled with stacked papers of articles that he had her reading only to say he did not like them enough to publish them. No matter how well she spoke about the contents.

She closed her eyes once again, pressing her nose to his naked shoulder and taking in his scent. Life could not be better, and though those three words that had the weightiest meaning in the world had not been spoken between the two, it could be felt. Flourishing between what was once hatred, perhaps something else.

His hand interlocked with hers on his stomach, speaking in a grumpy tone. “You wake up too early for anyone’s liking.”

She chuckled at his words, letting go of his hand and wrapping her arm and leg around his body. “I want coffee.” She dragged, because that was true. She had not wanted coffee from anyone or with anyone since they started being a real couple.

The lukewarm taste that they shared because they had spent too much time talking instead of sipping on their recently brewed coffees were enough for her.

“As per usual.” Seungcheol retorted, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. “Coffee later. Sleep now.”

“No, coffee now.”

“If you had not kept me up all night, we would be having coffee. Your fault, entirely.” Seungcheol spoke against her skin, a mess of limbs and half-whispered words.

“Excuse me? I was not the one who kept you up.”

“You mean to say you were sleeping last night?”

She had to look up to fight the smile building on her face but when she returned her gaze to him to retort, he was already watching her with a smirk on his features.

“I could have, judging by your performance alone.”

“Sure.” Seungcheol retorted with a purse of his lips. “Stop trying to play with my ego.”

“That is my favorite hobby, Mr. Choi.”

“Well, Mrs. Choi, I have a rather weak heart, so you better stop now.”

She chuckled at his antics, letting herself go in the warmth of him and sighing deeply against his skin. “What do you want with your coffee?”

“Just a few more minutes here and then, we will have our breakfast. I promise.”

She could not fight his words because a few more minutes together were exactly what they did not have.

### 

Dear my love,

It has almost been a year since the moment we got married. I remember the day as if it was yesterday. I was so nervous about giving you a kiss that I ended up kissing your cheek because I could see in your eyes that you wanted to be anywhere but there, with me.

I do not know how I got lucky or if life turned out to be a blessing for me, but seeing you fall for me—this ever complicated, sentimental, quite impulsive writer that could have given you a million reasons to dislike him that I am, has made me realize just how much I love you and how I wish to tell you through what you like the most. Words. Letters. Literature.

Hence, I am sorry I am not able to tell you on your face how much I thank my past self for picking you over everyone and everything else. Perhaps, when you finish reading this letter, I will have enough strength to see in your smile that I can tell you anything that passes through my heart.

Sincerely,

Your Mr. Choi.

### 

The birds sing a little differently when their first anniversary came around. She had greeted him as per usual in the morning, with a kiss on the lips and the promise of returning. She needed to grab something before, a limited edition of his favorite book that she would have to find in the local library.

She let the length of her flowy dress caress the floor she stepped on as she lurked through the library, around the corner in which the old lady by the desk had instructed. However, a call of her name had her looking over her shoulder, a smile appearing on her features but dissipating when she realized who it was that was standing before her.

Haneul looked different than he did under the glimmering lights of the sun and surrounded by the greeneries of his farm. His hair was shorter, his face slimmer and his frame half-crooked when leaning against the shelf. He held two glassed cups in his hands, shining in elegant white and blue as he grinned at her.

“Haneul…” She spoke, uninterested in him in the way she was, but relieved to see her friend well and alive. She had not heard from him in a while, much less had they kept in touch through letters as they did before. She moved closer, asking: “How are you doing? It has been a while since I heard from you.”

“I heard that you were passing around the library this week. I am working on the fruit shop at the front.” Haneul explained, passing one of the mugs over to her. “Some coffee, for the good old times.”

His face spoke all kinds of sincerity and she had to take a sip of his coffee recipe. Always ever-perfect and filled with nostalgia.

“Oh, what a nice thing! I am glad you are earning some money with this economy and how everything is doing…”

“Yes.” Haneul finalized that train of thought, drinking a big gulp of his own drink. “How is marriage life doing?”

She saw the glint of his eyes that she knew quite too well. Heartbreak. After all, they had something powerful before she got married for interest and then, for love. “Excellently. I could not be happier.”

They spoke a little more, as if the time had not passed. About his family, his dreams, her memories, their laughs. It was memorable and sweet, a nice addition to an important day that was finished by a wave of his hand and the promise of seeing each other another time.

Though, when she finally grabbed the copy of Seungcheol’s favorite book, her vision turned blurry. The letters on the front and the colors merged in a way that had her stomach acids going up and threatening to make her throw up, but she did not have enough strength to release what was inside her. Her legs became numb, tumbling to the side and hearing a gasp from far away. All she could feel was the void.

Seungcheol, come here…

Seungcheol, I need you…

Her words were never heard.

###

Dear my love,

Today would have marked ten years of being together. We only spent a year together and yet, I yearn for you like I have never done for no one else. I still wear my ring, still put a plate for you on the table so we can have breakfast. I lay every letter I write for our anniversaries on that bed you once took up before moving into my room, waiting for you to see them.

How I wish I would not have spoken about that book, so that goddamned man did not take you away. How I wish you would have drank coffee before going out that morning. I should have held you tighter, stayed for longer, loved you harder.

I should not have written those three words. I should have told them to you straight on.

It has been nine years since the last time I saw you and how I wish I could hear your voice one last time.

###

“What do you mean we’re staying here one more night?”

“I changed our flight tickets.” Chan is walking alongside him in the streets of Amsterdam and he would have pushed him away if there was no risk of him falling under a car and dying. He smiles at him when he starts walking backwards. “I met a girl and—oh, you will love her! She’s a librarian and I know mad shit about books, but she’s so hot.”

“Chan, you’re missing the point.” Seungcheol responds, taking a sip of his Styrofoam cup and passing by a less-than-crowded avenue. “I thought we were grabbing coffee and then heading back home.”

“Surprise, surprise?”

“Chan—”

“Just follow me, you old shithead.”

He does as the youngest says, but he is not so pleased about it. The walls are painted in white, with delicate blue flowers swirling around in quite a confusing manner. Chan accompanies him for half a second before getting lost in between the shelves, speaking someone’s name in the air and getting shushed in the process.

He’s not an old shithead.

Getting distracted by the old classics in the shelves, he traces the spines and hums to himself before he hears someone softly mumbling the words to a book to themselves. Somehow, he recognizes the voice but it’s almost impossible. It’s not like he has friends in Amsterdam…or that he has met anybody important.

The source of the noise comes from the woman seated by one of the wooden tables, swinging her feet and lurking through a book like her life depends on it. He clears his throat, as if to call for her attention and ask her to lower her voice, but that must be his most beautiful mistake. When she looks over her shoulder, the emerald tone of her dress stands out and while she doesn’t have tears gleaming down her eyes like in the glass that he shattered at that store, the beauty of her features remains there. He feels like he knows her, but from where?

“Sorry.” She announces, though he shakes his head immediately.

“No, no.” He moves over to where she is, jutting a finger towards the book she is reading. “That’s actually my favorite book. Is it the limited edition?”

“Only this library has it. I rent it from time to time, but always bring it back. The librarian is super attached to it.” She speaks with certainty, confidence, squinting her eyes at him. “Have I seen you?”

“No.” He chuckles. “But I feel like I have seen you, too.”

“Huh, strange.” She completes. “Well, two people with good taste in literature have met, hven’t they?”

Maybe, it was not so much of a bad thing that Chan decided to hit on the librarian.

#s.coups scenarios #s.coups #seventeen scenarios #seventeen #kpop scenarios #writing #seventeen fluff #seventeen angst #seventeen au #s.coups fluff #s.coups angst #s.coups au #series: when we were young #this is angsty but i promise it gets good lol

[savventeen]

carmen cygni

latin, meaning 'swan song' a metaphorical phrase for a final gesture, effort, or performance given just before death or retirement

pairing: seungcheol x gn!reader rating: M wc: 1.7k prompt: @caratober day 20 - zombie summary: while out searching for supplies, you get bit trying to escape a small hoard of zombies. seungcheol is forced to do the unthinkable. warnings: angst, seriously so much angst, all hurt no comfort, major character death (you), blood, guns, mercy killing, mentions of suicide, brief suicidal ideation tags: zombie au, seriously this is just pain guys i'm warning you, non-linear narrative, flashbacks, some mild religious talks a/n: this was originally a vmin fic i posted to ao3 (on valentine's day of all things holy shit was i okay) and decided to repost here for caratober. i am so sorry. (also fun fact it was the first time i'd ever cried while writing a fic :') this song is 98% to blame for this

five.

"Seungcheol."

It's the way you say his name that tells him something is very, very wrong. The syllables are weighted, heavy, resigned — two stones dropped in the ocean, sinking fast into a suffocating oblivion.

You say his name like the world is ending all over again.

Seungcheol finishes barricading the door from the pack of roamers outside, goosebumps rising on his skin through his sweat as dread courses through him in an icy wave, and he turns.

The first thing he sees is the blood. It's coated your hand where you have it pressed to your right side, just above the hip.

"Fuck, y/n—" His mind is immediately sent spiraling into an anxious overdrive, wondering when and how and where you could have gotten hurt, whether the basic supplies you have between the two of you will be enough until the roamers leave and you can make it back to camp, if—

And then you lift your hand, revealing the wound. It's messy, flesh torn and bleeding steadily — but despite all of that, it's impossible to miss the distinct impression of a set of human teeth.

You've been bit.

You've been bit, and the world drops out from beneath Seungcheol's feet.

"No." He stumbles closer, trembling fingers reaching out and stopping just shy of the wound, before looking into your watery eyes. "No."

It's a command if he's ever given one — because with all of the things the both of you have had to suffer through, had to see and hear and experience these last few years, this had never been a possibility. Never.

Never like this. Never you.

The hand not covering your bite comes up and fists into the front of his shirt. "Cheol."

A million things go unsaid with that single syllable, but Seungcheol can hear them all, can see each one etched into your devastated expression. And because he will always, always, put your needs above his own, he shoves all the crumbling pieces of his own heart down and down and away, instead making room for you to step into his arms and cry against his chest — a mourning for something that has yet to be lost.

You grieve, and Seungcheol refuses to shed a single tear.

four.

"Y/n? What's the matter— why are you crying?"

You giggled, angelic as always, even through the tears. "I'm just... really happy, Cheollie."

"You are?"

"Yeah, just..." You bit your lip, and without thinking, Seungcheol reached out to smooth his thumb over it. You sighed into a smile and leaned into his touch.

"We've all lost so much, you know?" you continued. "But we were still able to find each other — able to find all the others and make a family. And now we have a relatively safe place to live, and I just—"

You beamed at him, laughing, even as tears continued to trickle down your cheeks. Seungcheol wiped them away as gently as he could, and you brought up the little wildflower you'd been holding, one you must've plucked from between the dozens of others that grew in the abandoned courtyard of your new home.

You continued with a nostalgic grin. "Did you know, the first thing you ever gave me was a handful of these?"

Seungcheol blinked down at the flower. "Really?"

"Yeah, I'd just saved you from the homicidal goose that was lurking on the campus quad, and you ripped out a bunch of these right out of the ground and gave them to me as thanks, and then you said—"

"My knight in ripped denim armor," he continued for you, the memory coming back to him with a smile, "can I take you out on a date?"

You beamed at him, eyes turning into crescents, and Seungcheol thought that the world had never felt more beautiful.

three.

You look dead.

"Y/n, hey," Seungcheol whispers, carefully nudging your bare shoulder. Your skin has lost most, if not all, of its color, and you're drenched in sweat. For a moment, your eyes remain closed, unresponsive, and his stomach swoops in fear, but then your eyes flutter open and he breathes out a shaky sigh.

"There you are," he murmurs, cradling your jaw with one hand. "Drink some water for me, yeah?" You nod, and he brings the nearly empty water bottle to your lips, tilting it slowly so you can take little sips. After a few mouthfuls, you hum to indicate you've had enough, and he sets it back down before gently pulling you to lean against him once more.

You let your head loll against his shoulder, groaning quietly; you start to reach out a shaky hand between the two of you, and he takes it immediately, twining your fingers together. You sigh, content.

For a moment, Seungcheol almost forgets.

"You're gonna need to do it soon, Cheollie," you mumble.

Almost.

His fingers twitch in your hold. He swallows.

A part of him wants to play dumb, wants to put off thinking of the horror of the inevitable as long as possible, but that would be the selfish thing to do, he thinks. So he squeezes your hand and whispers, "I know."

You squeeze back. "And you're not allowed to follow me, okay?"

Seungcheol stills. "What?"

"I know you, Choi Seungcheol, and I know what you're gonna wanna do after— after. But you have to promise me that you won't, okay?"

He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. Something's encased his lungs in a vice grip.

You continue, "I need you to be strong for me, and I need you to get back to the group, and I need you to survive, okay?" Your eyes, redrimmed and glossy as they are, are wide and pleading, desperate in a way he's not sure he's ever seen before.

Seungcheol hadn't known that his heart could break any more than it already has. "Y/n."

"I know you won't want to live at first," you forge on, holding onto his hand like a lifeline, "I wouldn't either. But Shua and Hannie need you, Cheol. Channie needs you. They'll all need you, and you'll need them."

You're the one they need, he doesn't say — bites back behind clenched teeth, you're the one I need, the one I've always needed, the one I won't ever stop needing.

He closes his eyes, your name falling past his lips in a plea or a prayer.

Suddenly, he's being yanked toward you by the collar, coming nose to nose with your fiery, bloodshot gaze. "I need you to promise me."

And for the first time in his life, Seungcheol hates the fact that he's never been able to deny you anything. "Fuck you, y/n," he chokes out past a sob, reaching out to cradle your pallid face and press a trembling kiss to your lips.

"Seungcheol."

"Okay," he croaks, stealing one more kiss before bringing your sweaty foreheads together. "Okay, I promise."

Anything for you. Even this. Even this.

two.

"Lay with me for a bit, Cheollie?"

His smile was soft as he easily agreed, "Of course." He made himself comfortable in the grass next to you, making sure the two of you were connected shoulder to hip.

You both lost track of how long you spent staring at the stars in silence together, but eventually Seungcheol broke the quiet with a murmur. "What're we looking for?"

You hummed. "The way to heaven."

"Heaven?"

"Yeah." Your hand snuck its way into his and gently squeezed. "My aunt believed in capital 'G' God — used to point out all the different constellations to me and then tell me that when Jesus came back for everyone that he'd take us all up into heaven through the stars."

"Hmm." He chanced a glance at your profile. "Is that what you believe?"

You sighed. "I don't know if I believe in anything, anymore."

"Yeah." He squeezed your hand.

A few minutes passed in peaceful quiet.

"Cheollie?"

"Hmm?"

"Promise me something?"

Another squeeze of your hand. "Anything."

You swallowed. "Stay with me forever?"

Seungcheol rolled over onto his side so that he could look down at you, the love of his life, and tilted your face towards him with a gentle finger crooked under your chin. Voice full of a devout sort of conviction, he whispered, "There's not a single place I'd rather be than right by your side, forever and always."

"Forever and always?"

The kiss, soft and chaste and a universe all on its own, was answer enough.

one.

"Seungcheol."

Your voice is so quiet now, barely a rasp of air, that he almost doesn't hear you even as he cradles you against his chest. "Cheol, it's time."

He wonders if this is what drowning feels like.

He takes a deep, shuddering breath and swallows the lump clogging his throat. "Okay, love. Tell me what you need."

"Sing for me?"

Anything for you — even if it breaks me. "Yeah," Seungcheol's voice cracks, and he futilely clears his throat. "Yeah, of course. What song?"

I might not die, but this is going to kill me. You're killing me.

"S-Something pretty. Please."

Don't make me do this. Please, God, anyone, don't make me have to do this.

"Okay. A pretty song for my pretty baby." With one arm he pulls you impossibly closer to him, and with the other, he slowly reaches for the pistol strapped to his thigh.

He can barely get the notes out past his tears, but he does his best to carry the tune of your favorite lullaby, gently swaying you both in time with imaginary instruments. The gun feels impossibly heavy in his hold, and it only grows heavier as he slowly brings it up behind your head.

For a moment, he considers changing the angle just a bit — just enough.

But he made a promise. He made a promise, and even if it means living the rest of his life as something less than human — not a roamer in body and mind, but in spirit and soul — he'll keep his promise.

For you, he'll do anything.

(zero.)

He pulls the trigger.

And for the second and final time, Choi Seungcheol's entire world comes to an end.

#caratober #s.coups x you #s.coups x reader #seungcheol x you #seungcheol x reader #s.coups x y/n #seungcheol x y/n #s.coups angst #seungcheol angst #seventeenweeklyarticle #svt writing #svt fic #savv writes #savv fics #please please please read the warnings for this one #this is some heavy stuff folks pls be safe while reading #i am posting this and then going to bed so if u need to yell at me i will see when i wake up slkdfjslkdjf #also gonna say sorry one more time #sorry *drops fic and runs (to bed)*

[kpopimaginings]

“Let me be mad” - S. Coups (Seungcheol)

You were stood in the kitchen preparing dinner for one when your boyfriend entered. Silently, you continued what you were doing, refusing to acknowledge him.

"Babe?" you heard S.Coups ask. "I'm home." His voice was tender, clearly aware that you were upset with him and had a very good reason to be.

Instead of cooking for yourself, you should have been out with him on a date. It wasn't necessarily a fancy or important date but it was a date nonetheless.

However, things at Pledis had overrun and they ended up having a meeting over dinner, leaving you to sort yourself out.

"I'm sorry," he said. "Do you want me cook for you?"

"I'm fine," you replied bluntly, continuing what you were doing.

"You know I would have rather spent the evening with you, right?"

This time, you didn't bother to reply.

"I want to make it up to you," S.Coups assured you, but again, you ignored him. With a sigh he continued, "I don't know how else to apologise. If I could have been with you, I would have but-"

"I know," you snapped, bringing your hand down harshly on the worktop. "I know it's not your fault and I know you're sorry but it's frustrating and I don't know how else to be upset."

You stopped fussing with the food but still never turned to look at him.

"What can I do to make this better?"

"Let me be mad at you."

"But-"

"I have other shit going on too, OK?" you shouted as you finally turned to him. Emotions you had kept bottled up inside for far too long all pouring out. "All I wanted is a moment to sit in peace with my boyfriend and rant and be comforted."

"You can still rant to me, you can call or text or something you know this," he tried to explain.

"But I can't. Because if you aren't here in person it means you are busy and then I'll just feel guilty for distracting you or burdening you when you are working."

"Well, I'm here now. Let's go and sit-"

"Nope. I'm mad," you reminded him turning back to your meal.

He couldn't help but smile a little at your words. You tone was softer already and he knew that all that arguing with him was finally calming you down.

As you now had your back to him again, he approached carefully, wrapping his arms about your waist. He heard you sniff, and swiftly picked you up and carried you to the sofa.

"Coups, the food," you weakly protested as he dropped you off at the sofa.

He quickly ran back to the kitchen to make sure that everything was turned off and the food wouldn't be ruined and there wouldn't be a fire.

"What's the other shit, babe?" he asked returning to you. "I'm your boyfriend, you can tell me these things."

"Can I?" you asked, looking at him with glassy eyes. "I feel like my self-esteem has dropped and I'm just feeling like I'm not good enough for anything or anyone. I feel like I can't open up to you about it because you'll just feel guilty. Rationally, I know you are only bailing on me because of work and you can't help it, but I think it's starting to grind me down."

"I had no idea," he said softly. "Do you think it's me? Have I unintentionally made you feel this way?"

"Maybe," you muttered, refusing to look him in the eye. "I can't think of any other trigger."

"Can I do anything to help?"

I don't know," you replied as the tears began.

He was quick to pull you in to a tight embrace, whispering apologies in your ear.

"I'll tell you what, once this comeback is done, I'll make sure Seventeen get a break, you can book some time off too and we'll just be together," he suggested. "I don't mind where. If you want a holiday, just pick a destination and I'll take you there. If you want to stay here in the comfort of home, we can do that."

"That actually sounds really good," you told him, as you pulled away and wiped at your eyes. "Like I said, I know rationally that you don't cancel because of me, but-"

"But I'm your boyfriend," S.Coups finished. "And you should get a lot more of my time than you currently do."

"I mean, I do need to share you with your twelve children," you joked.

"Eh, they're big boys, they should be able to handle themselves without me for a bit."

As the last of your tears were dried a smile crept onto your face at your joking.

"So, just let me know what you want to do, and I'll make sure it happens as soon as I can."

"I love you, Cheollie," you told him finally. "But also, could you finish the food for me? I'm hungry and don't feel like cooking anymore."

With a chuckle, he pecked your forehead and stood.

"Anything for you," he assured you before disappearing to the kitchen.

NAVIGATION  |  SEVENTEEN MASTERLIST

#s coups #s.coups #seungcheol #s.coups imagines #s coups imagine #scoups imagines #seungcheol imagines #s.coups scenarios #scoups scenarios #seungcheol scenarios #s.coups fluff #s.coups angst #s.coups oneshot #s.coups one shot #s.coups drabble #s coups scenarios #s coups fluff #s coups angst #s.coups x reader #s coups x reader #scoups reader #seungcheol x reader #seungcheol fluff #seungcheol angst #seungcheol drabble #Seventeen #seventeen scenarios #seventeen fanfic #seventeen imagines #svt fanfic

[wongyuuu]

[2:08] glimpse of us

Seungcheol runs up the stairs, out of breath. There’s no military or gym training in the world that can prepare someone to run up 8 flights of stairs and he shouldn’t have done it to begin with. There were elevators but neither was there when he entered the building so he had the bright of just taking the stairs. 

The truth was, he was nervous. So incredibly so that staying in place waiting for the elevator to come back seemed too much, it was physically impossible for him just to stay put. The car ride had been a nightmare, his leg jumping up and down to the point his manager had to tell him to stop because “you’re shaking the entire car”.

He thought about his decision a lot, for months that was all he did. Thinking and taking no action at all. Not because he didn’t want to, but because he just couldn’t. 

Breaking up with you had been one of the hardest things he had ever done and what made it worse was the fact that you understood what he said. You understood why he was breaking up with you. Seungcheol would have rather you just screamed at him, hit him, lash out at him, or anything to show anger. He had promised you the world, everything he could, everything he had, and yet there he was taking it all back. 

He had watched, in complete despair, as tears ran down your face, your eyes seeming lost, focused on the window behind him, as you took in everything he had said. When Seungcheol was done talking you finally looked back at him. Your eyes glistened with tears, your cheeks stained with them. You blinked at him a few times as if trying to get something back in place, to get your thoughts in order. Collect them, somehow.

“I understand, Seventeen always comes first”

It was something he said many times. That was his job, to protect his members at all costs. Even at the expense of himself and his life. 

That was the last thing you said directly at him. And you managed to avoid him so well. In events both of you had to attend, he only saw glimpses of you. If there was a camera to his face, or yours, he couldn’t just look at you like he wanted, when you were performing all he could do was nod once or twice. If you happened to pass by him or his members, all you’d do was say a polite “hello” and bow your head. 

His heart broke every single time and he knew yours wasn’t doing much better either. Seungcheol knew you, he knew your tells, even as you did your best to control all of your emotions. 

That happened two and a half years before. Seungcheol had gone on tour and then enlisted, as planned. And every single day his heart had longed only for you. 

Maybe he was reading too much into it, maybe he was just projecting his own feelings in the thing he saw — or thought that he saw—, but Seungcheol was sure that you still felt the same way about him. If not the same then something still very similar. He knew it from the lyrics you wrote, and the things you said in interviews. 

“The color red hunts me, I think” you said once, laughing. 

Maybe he was projecting, yes, but there was also a chance that he may be right. And that was a chance he was willing to take, even if it turned sour the second he knocked on your door.

He did his best to pull the air back into his lungs in five seconds before finally knocking on the door. Seungcheol wasn’t even sure you were home, he just went there in hopes of finding you. 

It took you almost an entire minute to get to the door. Seungcheol didn’t want to get his hopes up, logically he knew that two and half years is a very long time and you could have been with someone else, or could just not want anything to do with him. But seeing you in a shirt he had left behind ignited a new spark of confidence in him.

“What are you doing here?” you said. 

It was hard to believe that he was actually there, truly in front of you, still in his uniform. You had seen on the news that he was bound to be discharged any day now but the precise one was kept a secret from the fans and thus everyone else. 

The last thing you expected was to see him on your door, in the same uniform every had gone crazy over. He looked taller, somehow, his shoulders wider than they used to be. It was something you knew was bound to happen to see it, in front of your very eyes was on your bucket list after the breakup.

“I need to ask you two questions,” he said.

You crossed your arms over your chest when you realized he had been looking at your shirt. His shirt, actually. You had managed to get rid of many of his things that had been left behind, that shirt wasn’t one of them. At first, it was because it smelled like him, it was a source of comfort when your heart was breaking time and time again. His perfume had disappeared a long time ago but still, there was no way to get rid of it. 

“Are you dating someone right now?”

Seungcheol opened and closed his fists, waiting for your answer. He didn’t know, had no idea, that he would get that nervous around you again. It was like when he first asked you out but so much worse because now he was trying to make amends. 

“That’s hardly any of your business,” you said, voice tired “but no, I’m not”

You sighed and ran a hand over your face. 

“Do you still love me?” his tone was almost desperate.

He knew that whichever your answer was, it would change his entire life. He would either be over the moon or your words would seal the nails on the coffin. 

“Seungcheol, why are you doing this?” your voice was barely a whisper. 

The last thing he wanted was to see you cry because of him, again. It was like that day, in his apartment all those years before, crushing his heart once more.  Instead of waiting for your answer, Seungcheol took the two steps separating you. He held your face in his hands, his eyes searching yours once again, to make sure that he wasn’t crossing any lines, that you too wanted that.

You sighed into him the moment his lips pressed over yours, your arms going around his waist, pulling him closer to you. Two and half years and nothing had changed.

“I do, I still do”

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#k-labels #seventeen imagine #seventeen x reader #seventeen x you #svt x reader #svt imagine #svt x you #seungcheol x reader #choi seungcheol x reader #scoups x reader #seungcheol x you #scoups x you #scoups #seventeen angst #seungcheol imagines #scoups imagines #choi seungcheol #seungcheol #s.coups #svt angst #seungcheol angst #scoups angst

[bluewhitehues]

I hate you not ♡

Choi Seungchol × f. reader

|Arranged marriage/ forced marriage |

Genre: Angst,fluff,sort of enemies to lovers.

Summary:Married against their will, seungcheol and y/n end up hating each other.

Part 1 | Part 2

Masterlist

After your shower, you wear your sweatshirt and shorts and go out towards the dining table where he's waiting for you. He was standing there leaning back on the counter. He comes forward when he sees you,giving you a little smile. He comes forward to pull the chair for you..you stop in your track looking at his smile cause this is the first time he's smiling at you.

"You're scaring me seungcheol." You say with eyes wide and round.

"Huh? Why? Because I pulled the chair for you?" He asks raising his eyebrows.

"That too but because you just smiled" you say looking & blinking up at him, eyes still round in surprise.

He narrows his eyes at you,"You are not gonna stop teasing me, are you?" He asks you notice his ears turning Red.

"I was dead serious, i got chills. You've never smiled at me ,last time I saw you smile was at the wedding,when you were forcefully smiling at the guests" You say finally sitting down.

He moves to arrange the dishes infront of you serving you, "Well yeah ..but I'm a human, I do smile ...I don't mean to scare you but you'll see it more often from now on " He says smiling again.

"Did you add anything in the food ?" You're half teasing him now but you're also half serious. You watch his eyes go comically wide "Oh my god, nooo ..why would you-" He shakes his head ,grabbing the chopsticks taking the food from each bowls and tasting it "see-" "nothings in there you can eat it." He says sitting down on his chair infront of you. You're trying to stifle your smile "okay okay sorry"

Well technically it isn't your fault. It's a very reasonable doubt. First he smiled at you, now he's giving you food to eat.

The idea of him being nice to you was too far fetched but him wanting to get rid of you, may be murder you, seems kind of right. Because let's be honest, he has always looked like he has a stick up his ass and whenever he talked it was venom. So your doubt is kind of reasonable.

There's spaghetti, spicy noodles, rice and chicken.

"What food do you like? "He asks you, trying to be casual "I wasn't sure so I just- got this" He says gesturing towards the food.

"This is fine I like rice in my meals , I like chicken too, seafood too, what about you ?" You ask back, glancing at him while eating the spaghetti.

"I like pretty much everything I love food..meat, rice, ramyeon everything.."

He says chewing on his food.

He initiates most of the conversations, it was quite awkward because you were not used to this.

"I always wanted to ask this but..did you have any girlfriend when our marriage was fixed? " You ask wiping your mouth with the napkin, looking at him for the answer.

"No I didn't..though I did think about bringing a fake one so I could break our marriage.."his lips twitch .."but I knew it wouldn't work, my father knows too much about me." He says shaking his head to the side.

"Ohh..I thought you had one that's why you hated me so much."

"Again I don't hate you..I never did,it's just I, i was angry i still am but I've got it now you shouldn't be the one on the receiving end of it ..i wasn't in the right mindset since our marriage was decided. You would know, you didn't like me too you were angry just as much, we almost didn't talk in the first month of our marriage..we avoided each other like plague" He chuckles.

"Well yeah I was in bad state too..it took so much for me to actually build some courage or even hope to actually talk to you , I didn't think you'd react so badly" You chuckle.."I just thought I'm trying so you'd open up to me too. But you were an asshole about it." You shrug.

"Okay say that as many times as you want until you feel better." He says in all seriousness nodding at you

"Daily..for two months atleast..i think I'll feel so much better" You say nodding back at him.

He closes his eyes with a sigh and opens them again "okay you can totally do that. I'm ok with it"

"Great then! Good night." You say getting up from the chair.

"Uhm ya good night ..sleep well." He says awkwardly smiling at you.

It's been a month since seungcheol is being nice to you. You're not as doubtful of him now. You've seen him, observed him enough to know that may be he really has changed, he really is showing his real side to you now, he has started to open up to you and he is making you feel comfortable around him now. You eat breakfast and dinner together these days ..sometimes he even texts you to ask if he could come and pick you up from the work. You wouldn't say you became friends totally but you're getting there with baby steps.

That weird look you saw in his eyes is still there when he smiles at you awfully softly when you say something funny or when you talk in general. You haven't been able to figure out what it is but you will confront him about it. The butterflies you feel whenever he gives you that smile are another topic you haven't been able to understand..don't you despise him? Why does he have those stupidly attractive and adorable dimples? why would you like his smile? You're weird seriously.

It's his brother's anniversary party today and you are supposed to go together. As a couple.

"Y/n" He knocks at your door "Are you ready?"

"Yeah coming just 2 minutes!!" You shout from inside.

When you come out and he sees you, his breath gets stuck..heart skips a beat or two and he's just standing there looking at you. You were fixing your hair, when you look up at him, he's just standing there like a statue his ears are somewhat red. And you would be lying if you say you didn't blush looking at him standing there all handsome and just staring at you. You never denied it, you know you've got a fine as hell husband.

"Let's go?" You ask him taking him out of his trance.

"Uh? Yes let's go." He says smiling you walk behind him towards the door when he turns around and says "You look good."

"Thank you, you're looking good yourself." You say While avoiding his eyes, hoping he wouldn't notice your natural blush along with the make up.

"Thank you." He says smiling.

You're wearing a sparkly glitter off shoulder gown with a slit on the one side of thigh. Hair long and deep berry coloured lips. Seungcheol is wearing a white button down with black pants.

He opens the car door for you and closes it after you sit.

Few minutes pass,you are on your way. Seungcheol is sitting beside you,you're in his fancy car, and Ofcourse he has his own chauffeur.

Seungcheol sighs glancing at you"I didn't want to go. My parents will be there." He says with a frown.

"It's ok we can come back early may be" you say giving him a reassuring smile.

"Yeah" He nods.

"Also stick closer to me even if you don't want it. So many people will be there, the photos might even get out in the press. I already don't like this." You blow out a breath shaking your head.

"Who said I don't want to stick closer to you ?" He asks raising his eyebrows at you.

"You do?" You ask.

"Aren't you my friend? I'd rather stay with you than have to talk with them." He shrugs.

"When did I agree to be your friend? I clearly remember me saying I'll think about it."

"I- ok then." He says nodding and looking out of the window. He's clearly sulking. His hands crossed over his chest, a pout on his face.

You let out a surprised chuckle,"Wait are you really sulking right now?" You ask trying to look at him.

He huffs,"No I'm not."

"Yeah? Say that while looking at me" You poke his shoulder with your index finger and he shrugs it off. He's still looking out of the window.

"Ok ok I was kidding. We are friends, you've proved it by now." You say smiling and he turns to you.

He narrows his eyes at you,"Thank you. You're so mean."

You raise your eyebrows at him"More than you?"

"No" He says in a small voice "but it was in past. I haven't been mean to you since the last month,have I?"

"No you haven't and I hope you continue that cheol."

His head snaps towards you at the speed of light, "cheol? Wait did you call me cheol?" He asks eyes big and a happy smile on his face.

You get flustered for a second, you didn't realise you said that ..so you say "decide one thing do you or do you not want me to be your friend? Friends call each other by nicknames"

"No no I want you to call me that ,you just took me by surprise." He quickly explains.

You get out of the car and he holds out his hand for you. You look up at him,he smiles softly at you. You fight off the blooming blush on your cheeks and take his hand. He holds you so gently. His hand is so warm,it makes you adjust your hand properly in his and hold it by your fingers. He smiles at you again. Helps you on the stairs.

You go inside the venue and notice there really are so many people.

"Let's just go and wish hyung and his wife first then we can go early." He says in your ear. You nod at him, the blush won't leave your face.

"Hey hyung -Noona Happy Anniversary to you both." Seungcheol says smiling at them and hugging his brother. His brother gets so happy seeing seungcheol, that too he brought you with him. You also wish them.Seungcheol nudges you to hold the gift he has been holding in his hand,so you both could give it to them.

He again holds your hand. Guiding you towards an area where you could sit. Just then his old friends call him, they talk to him..you whisper in his ear,"I'll go sit there or else my heels would kill me" You say pointing at the drink and snacks counter where surpringly are very few people. "Ok stay there I'll be there in 5 minutes" He says nodding. stroking your hand with his thumb before letting it go. You go and sit there and order a mocktail. Cheol wants to go to you, he keeps glancing at you but his friends won't stop talking. Just when he was glancing at you he notices a man standing few feets away from you staring at you, cheol follows his eyes going to your exposed leg and instantly feels his blood boil. He clenched his jaw, excusing himself from his friends. He goes straight to you blocking you from the man's view. Putting one of his hand on the counter and the other behind you on your chair,he's standing so close to you.

"Sorry I took so long didn't I? They won't stop talking" He says looking down at you.

You knew it was him,you smelled his cologne as soon as he was behind you. So you don't get startled. You look up at him when he talks to you. You notice him standing so close to you and raise your eyebrows at him. "Well it's ok"

He ignores your silent question and keeps looking at you, "what are you drinking?" He asks.

"Oh ..just a mocktail, I'm lightweight I can't handle alcohol" You give him a toothy grin looking up at him. And god he finds you adorably adorableeee. How can you be so fine and cute at the same time. He has this urge to pinch your cheeks, so he does,very lightly. Chuckling showing his own teeth on full display. Looking at you with that weird look again. "That's ok, I know a few more you'd like ..wait." Then he shifts his attention from you to the bartender, telling him a few names.

As much as you liked him standing next to you, "Aren't you going to sit down?" You ask him tilting your head.

"Oh yeah" He says pulling a chair close towards you and sits down.

You enjoy the drinks he ordered for you complementing him that it really is good. He smiles at you that stupidly attractive dimple smile.

"You want to get out of here?" He speaks in your ear so you could hear him over the music.

"Home?" You ask him with furrowed eyebrows. He shakes his head smiling at you "you'll know let's go" He says getting up. You get up and nearly trip. He instantly grips you by your elbow. "Hey careful.. you ok?" He asks worried. You notice the hook of your heel is undone,he follows your gaze and instantly gets on his knees to fix it for you. Your eyes nearly bulge out of their sockets. And the butterflies? They are tickling your tummy so bad and may be they are sitting on your cheeks too.

You didnt expect him to do that "Cheol you don't need to-" he cuts you off,getting up.

"It's ok, let's go" He smiles taking your hand in his again. God you're blushing and you notice a few people looking at you two.

Seungcheol sees his parents approaching and speeds up instantly. You sigh when you're out in the open air. "Till when you're not going to talk to them. Your mom looked so sad, you should atleast talk to her."

"I don't know y/n ..They need to understand I'm not a robot who's supposed to follow their orders. I've feelings too."

"Sorry I didn't mean to upset you"

"You didn't"

He takes you to a place where it's so peaceful, you can hear the crickets chirping, you hear the water flowing and the best part is the night sky filled with infinite stars. "Woah" you look up in awe. swirling yourself to capture the whole sky in your eyes.

"You like it?"

"Like? Cheol I love it" You say laughing and he thinks the stars you're holding in your eyes right now are even more precious and beautiful than the actual ones.

"I'm glad you love it".. "You're about to love it even more." He says giving you a mischievous smile.

You look at him confused your brows furrowed. He goes to the car taking a white bag from it and bringing it to you.

"When did you even get this?" You look at him eyes wide when he takes out the yummiest looking fried chicken and burgers. "I told hanbin to buy it" He says gesturing towards the car where the said chauffeur hanbin is.

You eat it while sitting on the bench.

You giggle looking at him "what?" He asks cheeks filled with the burger he's eating.

"You look like a four year old baby eating. Look you've got sauce and crumbs all over your lips." You say still giggling.

"Just say I look cute and go." He says narrowing his eyes at you. And he really does look so cute you almost coo.

"And you're no one to talk you've got sauce on your lips too" He says grabbing a tissue and wiping it gently on the side of your lips. You pause eating. Why's he doing this to you?? first he held your hands, then he fixed your heels, he brought you at such a beautiful place and now this. And how can you forget he brought his jacket from the car because he noticed you getting cold, the butterflies, the heartbeats everything has been a mess for you. And him? He seems so casual about it like it's the most normal thing to do, making you feel like you're only overthinking.

You reach home, and your thoughts won't let you be in peace so you hold his sleeves from behind stopping him. He turns towards you,"hmm?" His thoughts were filled with you too, thinking how you'd now go in your room and he can't be close to you, how tomorrow is too long to see you again.

You can't pull him towards you so you step towards him, tightening your hold on his sleeves. "I've questions for you." You say looking him in the eye. And his eyes go a little wide but he's quick to mask it. "Okay..go ahead."

"Why do you look at me like that?"

"Huh?"

"You have been looking at me like that alot these days..are you hiding something from me? " You ask him further.

In one swift motion he removes your hand from his sleeves and envelops it in his own.

"Do you still not trust me?"

"I'm not saying that, I'm asking why are you looking at me like that ..the way look at me it changed..you have been acting so weird since last month and i didnt actually buy it completely when you said you started acting nice to me because i didnt eat dinner and breakfast ..i mean come on that doesnt make that much sense ..look at you holding my hand right now, and do you want me to say every little thing you did today?"

"Will you say anything or am I just crazy?"

You notice his cheeks turning Red.

"You're gonna make me say it, Aren't you?" He whispers.

"Make you say what?" Your own voice not above a whisper as he's looking at you like that

He steps closer to you, hand still holding yours. "Promise me you won't get angry at me or won't forget this past month we spent together?." He says worrying his lower lip between his teeth.

You have not seen him this nervous before."Depends on what you're going to say cheol ..but ok I'll try..what is it" You ask tilting your head at him, for some reason you're nervous too. You liked this past month so much,you don't want to ruin your progress.

"I-" He takes a long breath with closed eyes and then again matches your gaze. "What if I told you I actually like you?"

Your heart starts speeding at his words, "That's something I never thought would be an option ..but do you?" You ask tentatively, your eyebrows furrowed.

"I do" He says tightening his hold on your hand. "I like you y/n."

You keep looking up at him, opening and closing your mouth again not knowing what to say, your brain is covered by fog suddenly.

"Please say something..I'm kind of dying here" He says holding your hand as if you'll go away from him any second.

"Since when?" You ask

"From last two months, since I admitted it to myself. But i think i started to like you even before that,unknowingly. " He tells you, his eyes vulnerable.

" Are you right now saying that was you liking me? Really? I don't understand two months back you were far from liking me" You look at him confused.

His cheeks get warmer again with the embarrassment,"I know I'm sorry that was me being an idiot you know me by now..i- I purposely tried to push you away because I didn't want to give my parents the satisfaction that I did end up liking the girl they chose for me against my will." He says squeezing his eyes shut in embarrassment.

"Huh" You huff in disbelief.."Are you saying you made me suffer, let me think of myself as a fool , just because you were in denial and you didn't want to like me?? You idiottt" You say trying to free your hand from his hold and hitting his chest with the other one. "You idiot of a man you idiot" You say hitting him again and again.

"I know..I know I'm sorry ..I'm sorry,just one last time I swear I won't give you any reason to complain again, just one last time ..I'm not an idiot anymore I swear, I'd rather hurt myself than hurt you again ." He doesn't leave your hand(you stop trying after few attempts) and let's you hit him as much as you want, until you stop and your hand drops by your side.

You look up at him with your own vulnerable eyes, they're glossy and seungcheol curses himself all over again.

Your eyes going from his one eye to another and then you're lurching forward to hug him.. You bury yourself in his neck/shoulder, hands looping around his waist, clutching his shirt in a tight hold. You close your eyes, trying to calm yourself and just dissolve in his arms. On the other hand he thinks his heart stopped beating for a second when you hugged him because he didn't expect that, he thought you'll be mad at him again. But soon he holds you to himself again pulling you closer. Burying his face in your hair, taking a deep breath,finally letting out a sigh. He feels like he'll cry any second. He has never felt such intense emotions for anyone before. You do something to him which he can't quite explain. "I'm sorry." He says in a quite whisper,as if it'll break your bubble if he even let's out a loud breath.

You notice the crack in his voice and say,"shut up ..I hate you." Your own voice a whisper too as you breath in his scent,clutching the fiber of his shirt even more tightly.

"Mhm It's ok..I'll take that too" He says smiling to himself. Pressing his lips on your hair,kissing there a few times.

It's like both of you don't want let each other go because you just keep standing there hugging each other.

You think it's been 10 minutes.

"I like this but my feet are starting to hurt." You mumble in his shoulder. He opens his eyes to look down at you, you pull back to look at him too.

"Oh ..you're still wearing your heels." He says looking down, you both are blushing, your cheeks tell it all.

"Sit here" He says, guiding you to the couch with your hand.

He gets down on his knees for the second time today. Carefully taking your leg on his knee and undoing the hooks of your heels one by one..his soft light touch sends goosebumps on your skin. "Oh..you're whipped for me ..Mr. Choi, who would've thought" You say with a teasing smile. Inside you're a blushing mess but you won't leave a chance to tease him.

"And if I am?" He says raising one of his eyebrow and he's smirking Ofcourse. Oh you're gone..cause there is no reason to find this so hot as you're finding it right now. And that brat doesn't stop at that, he squeezes your ankle in his hand pulling it towards himself. You shiver at his touch, and try to fight off the blush on your cheeks but fail so badly, so you just look away from him, avoiding his eyes. He smirks even more then let's out a chuckle.

He removes the other heel too. "You won't answer me?" He asks Standing up. "No" You reply. He chuckles again saying "ok tomato." "Wha-?What kind of a nickname is that?" You say looking up at him with a huff. "Because you look like one right now" He says poking your cheek with his index finger. Dimples blooming fully on his cheeks. "Yeah? Should've looked at yourself a few minutes ago" You say huffing, standing up. Brushing past him,he instantly catches your hand, "let me walk you to your room you're limping ..are you sure you're ok? Does it hurt bad?" He asks looking down at you worriedly. "It's ok it'll go away..just the side effect of wearing pretty heels." You say pouting at your feet.

"I can totally massage them ..or pick you up if you want." He says. You turn to him narrowing your eyes at him. "Just saying" He shrugs trying to stifle his smile. When you turn again going to turn the nob of your door. He pulls you a little making you look at him. "Are you going to come out again after changing? We could talk.." He says nibbling his lip. He just doesn't want to let you go. "Talk about what?" You ask softly, raising your brows at him. "Just..anything" He shrugs. "Ok I'll see." You say ..he let's you go with a sigh then whispering an "ok".

And you're no different you don't want to go as well. So you turn around calling him, "Seungcheol" This time you're the one catching his hand. "Hmm?" He turns around and you go forward, pulling his hand keeping it on your waist and holding both of his cheeks in your hands.. you stand up on your toes and press your lips on his. His eyes go wide, but he's quick to hold you. After a second of glitching he quickly holds your jaw with other hand and turns his head to the side to kiss you better. He walks you backward slowly,pressing you on the door. Your noses bumping with each other. He's kissing you so gently yet so intensely and you're trying to return it as much as possible. You pull back to catch your breaths.

"Guess you're whipped for me too Huh?" He says exhaling above your lips, wiping his thumb over your lower lip.."And if I am?" You say with a smirk repeating what he had said. You watch his eyes go from wide and round to dark and dangerous in a second before he groans and presses his lips on yours again, more harshly this time. "Mhm" You let out and press yourself further in his arms looping your hands in his neck, and his hair pulling and caressing the hair on his nape.

"A-are you- trying to kill me baby?" He asks in between the kiss,pulling back so you could hear him. "Shit - don't- call me that" You say between the sharp exhales to catch your breath. "Youh-you don't like it? " he asks furrowing his eyebrows, removing the hair strands from your face with his fingers and putting them behind your ear.

"Nah..I like it too much.. that's the problem." You say your eyes going from his eyes to his lips. He smiles, again those damn dimples. He chuckles and presses his lips on yours gently, you feel it tickle your lips. "Thank you for telling me that ..baby" He says,talking over your lips. You feel his smile growing. And looking at him that happy and smiley, you laugh too..pressing your giggles to his lips. "I'm not letting you go now..it's all your fault" He says pulling you to himself again kissing you properly.

.

.

A/N: so here's the part 2 ..sorry for being late but look it's so long and my hands just kept going 😭😭 they still want me to write more ..if you want that too then reblog/ comment. AND HOW IS IT PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME.❤️

#scoups x reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen fluff #seventeen angst #seventeenimagines #seventeen #seventeen fanfic #svt x reader #svt fluff #svt imagines #fanfic #choi seungcheol #seungcheol angst #seventeen imagines #seungcheol fluff #seungcheol x reader #seventeen seungcheol #seventeen scenarios #svt angst #svt #s.coups #seventeenangst #seventeen au #kimmingyu #kimmingyuff #svt mingyu #svt dino #svt dokyeom

[fantasyescapes17]

Patience (Part 2, Final)

An elaborate charade- that is what your life has been for these past few years, and it has taken the help of more than one person to balance your delicate lies and secrets. Now entering your final season as an eligible young lady seeking wedded bliss, will you be able to keep up the act in order to achieve your dreams?

Genre: Choi Seungcheol x female!reader. Regency!AU (It's sort of Bridgerton-esque in the sense that I give zero attention to historical accuracy and prioritize aesthetics lmao) You are Jeonghan's sister so your last name is Yoon, but the reader has no other specific characteristics, physical or otherwise.

Word Count: 5.2k+

Part 1

Series Masterlist

The assembly rooms were crowded this evening. During the early days of London's season, much of the upper class was eager to gossip and speculate on which eligible young bachelors would finish the season with a ring on their finger.

Viscountess Hong's grip on your arm gave you some comfort. "I believe Seungcheol should be here already," she told you reassuringly. "The Viscount told me that he arrived in London earlier this afternoon… ah! There they are!"

A small group of men were gathered around a card table. You recognised many of them- including Mr. Kwon and Mr. Lee from the Grisham's ball a few days ago. 

But it was difficult to pay attention to other people at the card table when the man you were passionately in love with sat there and looked up at you with wide eyes. 

"Miss Yoon," Seungcheol said as he stood and came over to you without hesitation. There was a heavy pause. Multiple pairs of knowing eyes from the card table turned to watch you with interest. 

You swallowed your nerves and smiled. 

"Mr. Choi."

You shakily offered Seungcheol your hand and he did not hesitate to take it. He lifted it to his soft lips briefly- you longed more than anything to feel his lips against your skin, but your gloves and the watching eyes prevented you from pushing for anything more than this fleeting contact.  

"I am delighted- it has been a long time since I have had the pleasure of seeing you in person," he said breathily. Seungcheol stepped closer and lowered his voice so that only you (and perhaps the Viscountess beside you) could hear him. His dark eyes sparkled mischievously. "You look even more beautiful than I remember."

Your heart leapt. 

Seungcheol had always known how to make you speechless. 

“I- erm-” 

He stepped back again quickly. He was as conscious as you of the watching eyes. While those at the card table had been entrusted with the secret of your clandestine affair, it would not do to have any gossip-mongers catching wind of this. You were in love, but you were not young or foolish. There was too much at stake to be careless now. An uncontrolled display of affection would lead to a scandal- and was certainly not worth destroying the hard work of so many years. 

Viscountess Hong tightened her grip on your arm and turned to her husband. 

“Joshua- the dancing has not yet begun. Shall we take a turn about the gardens? I would like for my dear friend Miss Yoon to accompany us. And Mr. Choi, you look rather flushed. Perhaps you had best join us for a breath of fresh air as well.” 

You bit back a smile. Viscountess Hong was not only very clever, but was proving to be an invaluable friend. You wondered how you would repay her. 

Viscount Hong nodded at his wife. “Of course, my dear.” 

You tried to stay calm as the Viscountess led you along with the two gentlemen out to the gardens. It was late evening- hopefully the approaching dusk would make it harder for your group to be spotted. In any case, the presence of the Viscount and Viscountess as chaperones gave your little venture an innocent appearance. 

The Viscountess was speaking to you pleasantly about the upcoming ball that she and Viscount Hong would be hosting the coming week while your group turned about the walking path in the gardens. She led you to a small but thick copse of trees and glanced around furtively before stopping in her tracks and dropping her sweet smile. 

“Well. We finally appear to be alone. If you walk a little farther you will reach a dead end hidden by bushes. Joshua and I will sit on this bench- nobody will be able to reach you unless they cross us and we shall divert them.” 

You stared at her. 

“I… are you sure it is safe?” you asked hesitantly. “If someone were to see us without you...” 

Viscount Hong exchanged an uncharacteristically mischievous glance with his wife. “It is safe. You can trust us. Go,” he reassured his friends. 

Seungcheol thanked him with a quick nod before disappearing further into the trees and you followed your lover eagerly until the Hongs were just out of sight. The trees brought the path to an end and Seungcheol turned to face you with a soft smile. 

“My love…” 

It appeared your thoughts were aligned. Seungcheol reached for your hands and expertly slid your gloves off in one fluid motion before bringing your bare hands up to his warm, familiar lips. He kissed the back of your hand, your knuckles, your palm, the tips of your fingers- over and over again until you finally twisted your hand and used it to cup his cheek.

“I’ve missed you,” you whispered. 

Seungcheol’s eyes closed as your hands gently caressed the side of his face, and he leaned into your touch eagerly. 

“I have missed you too. More than you can imagine,” he replied with a chuckle. “I am afraid Jeonghan has grown tired of me asking about you. But I cannot help it- hearing the sound of your name has been my only solace for the past many months. How have you been, my love?”

Your heart fluttered. My love. You loved hearing the passionate endearment from his lips. Seungcheol’s dark eyes opened and met yours with an expression of soft adoration that he reserved only for you. 

“As well as I can be, considering the circumstances,” you told him pleasantly. 

Seungcheol smiled and raised an eyebrow. “And what circumstances would those be?”

“The circumstances which keep me apart from you. My mother has promised that Mina will make her debut in society next season. I am confident that she will immediately become the centre of attention and Mother may finally admit that I have no other prospects- then she may be delighted at the thought of me marrying you, despite…” you trailed off hesitantly, realising that you had begun the sentence in a manner which made it difficult to complete. 

“Despite my being a father and widower,” Seungcheol finished for you plainly. 

You avoided his gaze. “Seungcheol, you must not-” 

“My love, please. I am certainly not ignorant of the reasons we keep our affections secret. Your mother is not the only one who knows that you could do far, far better than me in matrimony. You are young and beautiful. You deserve to marry a man who can devote himself to you. You will not hurt my feelings by saying so. Indeed, you insult me by pretending that is not the case. Do not forget that I have received from Jeonghan a list of the numerous men that have sought your hand over the past three years.” 

You looked up at him softly. “None of them could compare to you.” 

Seungcheol covered your hand on his cheek with his own. “Sometimes I wonder if you deceive yourself.” 

You bit back a playful smile. “I have often wondered the same- that perhaps you have cast some terrible spell on me to make me love you so. But then I remember that Jeonghan would never have encouraged our courtship if he did not think you were the perfect match for me. And I trust my brother’s judgement almost as much as my own.” 

“Perhaps you should not trust him. What is this I hear about your dowry?” 

“Oh- it is another lie. I thought it would ward off the fortune hunters, but I am afraid it has made Jeonghan look like quite the villain. He is not pleased. Hopefully he will be able to redeem himself in society soon,” you explained. “I owe him so much.”

“As do I.”

You took a deep breath and then removed your hand from Seungcheol’s face, choosing instead to clasp both his warm hands in yours. “How is Jiwoo? I have not seen him in many months. He must have grown so much.” 

Seungcheol smiled again, as he always did at the mention of his young son. “He has grown. He remembers you well and asks about you frequently. The only reason he allowed me to depart for London this morning is because I promised to bring back a letter from you.” 

“I will write one immediately,” you promised. 

“I have often wondered whether I should ask him how he would feel if you became a part of our family,” Seungcheol admitted gently. “Perhaps…. it is because I am sure that he would be delighted at the idea that I have not asked. I do not want to disappoint him if things do not turn out as we expect.” 

“Why wouldn’t things turn out as we expect?” 

“Because, my love, we are not formally engaged and if you should finally come to your senses and decide that you want a better life for yourself than marrying a widower with a son… I would not want you to deny yourself for fear of hurting Jiwoo or me.” 

You sighed. “That will not happen. We have had this conversation before, Seungcheol, so many times, and I have always told you-” 

“I know, my love. I know. But the only reason you don’t receive five or six offers a year is because your brother goes to great lengths to prevent them, and-” 

“It is because I go to great lengths to prevent them!” you insisted hotly. “Do you think I take this lightly, Seungcheol? Do you think I have thrown away my most eligible and crucial years in society on a whim? This-this entire charade, this act, all the lies- these are all because I love you and I want nothing more in this world than to be your wife one day. I want nothing more than to be able to stand up in society and call you my husband with pride. Do you not believe me when I say these things?” 

Seungcheol lifted his hand to your face gently. “My love…” 

“Well?” 

“Of course I believe you. And I love you. Forgive me.” 

Your brief burst of anger melted away. “We are closer than ever to having what we’ve dreamed of. Please don’t-” 

You were interrupted by a sudden rustling in the bushes. You and Seungcheol jumped apart only to be relieved when only Viscountess Hong appeared. She looked apologetic. 

“I’m afraid some other people have decided to take a turn about the gardens. We may be joined by company in a few moments. I hate to interrupt, but…” 

“Of course,” Seungcheol replied as he dropped your hand and quickly ran a hand over his face. You composed yourself as well and took the arm that the Viscountess offered you. “We should return to the assembly rooms. I am sure the dancing has begun.” 

You walked back with Viscountess Hong, allowing Seungcheol and Viscount Hong to walk ahead. The Viscountess gave you a teasing smile. 

“Had a pleasant conversation?” she asked lightly. 

You smiled at her gratefully. “I don’t know how I shall ever thank you.” 

 “I thought perhaps you may like to name your first child after me….”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You indulged in only one dance with Seungcheol that evening. Any more would certainly warrant suspicion, and you took care to dance with Mr. Kwon Soonyoung and Mr. Lee Seokmin immediately afterwards to ensure that it did not appear as though you were paying any special attention to Seungcheol. Then you retreated to the card tables where you could converse with your lover in a low voice, easily drowned out by the noisy laughter of his friends. 

“I wish this evening would never end,” you whispered to Seungcheol as you pretended to concentrate on your cards. You were not even sure what the card game being played was. Presumably, you were losing money.  “How much longer shall you be in London?” 

Seungcheol’s eyes darted towards you, not allowing them to linger on your face for too long. “Only a few days. I shall probably stay until the Hongs’ ball on Monday- then I will need to return home. You know that Jiwoo cannot be apart from me for long.” 

You smiled. “A feeling he and I share.” 

Seungcheol returned your smile. “Yes, but you do not have the privilege of throwing tantrums and taking out your anger on your governesses. I fear his teenage years dreadfully.”

“Let the poor boy enjoy his childhood. Jeonghan has told me stories of your youth. I know that you were no angel when you were his age,” you said with a small giggle. “Yet you have grown into a gentleman. Jiwoo certainly will too.” 

“Unless you come around and spoil him.” 

You bit back a smile behind your cards. “I might.” 

Seungcheol smiled and turned his attention back to the game as his turn came around. You looked around the room. You had not seen your brother all evening. You expected Jeonghan to be here. He was close friends with Seungcheol, after all, and surely had nothing else to do in London this evening. Perhaps he was tired of company. 

You had just set down your cards, deciding that you were losing too much money to justify continuing this game when the Viscountess approached your chair and bent down near you. 

“Miss Yoon. I am extremely sorry to have to interrupt your evening, but I am afraid I am quite exhausted and must leave for home,” she told you gently.  

You looked up at her in surprise. “Oh- of course. Are you unwell?” 

“Not at all. But my feet have been hurting for some time and I unfortunately as your chaperone, I cannot leave you behind here. The carriage is waiting outside” 

“Of course. I understand. We shall leave at once,” you promised her. You turned to look at Seungcheol who had been listening to your conversation and gave him a longing smile. “You will be at the Hongs’ ball on Monday, you promise?” 

Seungcheol smiled. “I have already accepted the invitation. I shall see you there, my love.” 

—-----------------------------------------

“You smile too much in his presence,” your mother scolded you in a hushed voice. “Try not to expose yourself. We may not be in London but there are still enough people around to misunderstand your intentions and spread rumours.” 

You bit back your smile. It was already the third week of your stay at the Choi estate. Little Jiwoo had announced that he wanted to have a picnic by the river and it being a warm spring afternoon, the rest of the household was in agreement. The Yoons and the Chois had set off, with neatly packed picnic baskets and blankets to enjoy the beautiful outdoors. 

“Would it be so very bad, mother?” you wondered innocently. 

Your mother looked horrified. “What? Good heavens, child, what can you be thinking?” 

Seungcheol was playing a lively game of catch with Mina and little Jiwoo on the grass a short distance away. He was incredibly patient with both of them. He made sure to throw the ball gently to Jiwoo, and offered Mina praise whenever she did well. Seungcheol’s bright smile and tousled hair shone in the soft sunlight, making it difficult to keep your eyes off him. 

Choi Seungcheol was the most perfect man you had ever met. 

You tried not to blush. “I only mean… we know Mr. Choi well, He is the same age as Jeonghan, and has been friends with him for many years. He is rich. He has a large estate, he is a gentleman and he has been so kind to us during our stay here…” 

Your mother stared at you. “Are you a fool? He is a widower. He has a son.” 

“Why should that matter? I don’t understand, mother.” 

“You are too young, child. You do not comprehend the dangers of being a second wife. Mr. Choi already has an heir; an heir to whom you are not the mother. Even if you have further children with him, they will not be the ones to inherit his estate. If Mr Choi should die- as men often do- you will be at the mercy of that boy who may cast you out of the house and onto the street. Do you think he will have much love for his stepmother? You are a woman. Your future happiness and security relies on securing a position that nobody can question, a position that is not so precarious.” 

You looked at your mother quietly. “Do you consider your own position so precarious, mother?” 

“It was different for me,” she said dismissively.  

“How was it different?” 

“I was not as young as you. I was not as pretty as you. I was not as rich as you. I took the best position I could find and I am lucky your father was kind to me while he was alive. But you deserve better. You are one of the most desirable young women in society and you have no need to… to settle for someone like Mr. Choi.” 

You looked down at your hands. “I see.” 

“Trust me, my dear. Once we arrive in London next season and all the handsome young men begin vying for your hand, you will understand that you could do much, much better than Mr. Choi. I promise you.” 

You turned away. Seungcheol had just caught a ball that Mina threw at him clumsily and as he turned his head in your direction, your eyes met. He gave you a warm, lopsided smile and brushed his dark hair out of his eyes before gesturing for you to join them. 

“Miss Yoon! You should join our game- your sister Mina says you are a terrible catch and you must prove her wrong,” he called out to you cheerfully. 

You laughed. “I am afraid Mina is quite right!” 

“Then perhaps Jiwoo can teach you how to catch!” 

You glanced at your mother for permission. She looked displeased but made no move to prevent you from joining their lively game. You quickly brushed off your skirts and walked over to little Jiwoo, who looked up at you with a big gummy smile that resembled his father’s. 

“I’m afraid that I do not know how to play. Will you teach me, Jiwoo?” you requested. 

Jiwoo nodded shyly. “Of course, Miss Yoon!” 

You looked up and your eyes met Seungcheol’s once again. He was watching you with a quiet, admiring look in his eyes that made it difficult not to blush. Your mother was right about some things. Perhaps you did smile too much in Mr Choi’s presence, and perhaps you were too enamoured with the handsome widower. Maybe, just maybe, he was a little too taken by you as well. 

But she was wrong about one thing. 

You would not be settling if you married Mr. Choi Seungcheol for love. 

—-------------------------------------------------

The Hongs’ carriage stopped outside your London abode and you bid farewell to your friends before rushing up the front stairs. A manservant opened the door for you. When you entered the lobby, you realised immediately that something was quite wrong. 

One of your mother’s ladies maids looked distressed and cried out when she saw you. 

“Miss Yoon! Oh, you must come quickly, your mother is in such an uproar!” she cried. 

Your heart sank. “What…” 

There was a loud crashing noise from the adjoining dining room and you could hear the muffled sounds of your mother yelling. You ran as fast as your heavy gown would allow and threw the door open just in time to see your mother throw a porcelain plate straight at Jeonghan’s head. He managed to dodge it and the plate hit the wall behind him before shattering to pieces. 

“Madam, please!” Jeonghan yelled desperately. 

You ran to your mother and grabbed her hand before she could reach for another plate. “Mother!” you cried. “Stop it, what are you doing? You’ll hurt him!”

Your mother turned to you, her face red and eyes wild. “What else shall I do? Do you know what that boy has done? He has proposed to Mr. Jeon’s daughter! After blatantly stealing your dowry and ruining your prospects and driving away your suitors, he has the nerve- the audacity- to marry and next he will throw us out of our home! How dare he? After all I’ve done for him since he was a child-” 

You seized your mother’s arms. “Mother, please, there must be some explanation-” 

“Ask him! Ask him- he is responsible for our current state!” she screamed. 

You looked at Jeonghan. Your brother had turned to face the wall and was pressing his fingers to his temple. He looked stressed, and your heart sank in your stomach. This was your fault. Jeonghan was taking this abuse from your mother solely for your sake and it struck you how selfish you had been. 

“Mother, sit down,” you told her gently. “Let us talk about this-” 

She huffed. “I will not sit down! I am going to take our carriage straight to the Jeons’ manor and inform Mr. Jeon the precise nature of the villain that he is about to promise his daughter to! After destroying so many of your prospects I don’t see why he should be allowed to happily marry whomever he pleases!” 

Jeonghan turned and looked at your mother, alarmed. This was the first you had heard of Jeonghan courting anyone, much less proposing to Miss Jeon,  but that was a discussion for a later time. It was clear from your brother’s expression that the idea of your mother going anywhere near the Jeons’ home absolutely horrified him. 

“Mother, you will do no such thing,” you told her firmly. “Jeonghan has not taken my dowry.” 

“What?” 

“I asked him to lie. The dowry money is safe and Jeonghan has promised he will give the full amount to me when I am married- only… only I have already decided who I wish to marry, mother.” 

Your mother looked bewildered. 

“I don’t understand. You have not received any proposals this season.” 

Your lower lip trembled. It was difficult to reveal the secret that you had kept hidden from her for so long- almost as much for her sake as your own because you knew how she felt about Seungcheol. You knew that her disapproval of him stemmed not from any ill will towards him, but from her own insecurities and her love for you. 

But it was not right to allow Jeonghan to bear the brunt of your problems any longer. 

Somebody would be hurt tonight. Perhaps it was best for it to be you. 

“Mother, I have been courting Mr. Choi Seungcheol for the past three years.” 

Your mother stared at you in horror- she looked disbelieving for a moment but then a sudden understanding dawned behind her eyes. Her knees trembled and you kept a grip on her arm as she pulled out one of the dining room chairs and sat down shakily. She looked up at you with disdain. 

“I warned you about Mr. Choi. He is a widower! He has a son!” she cried. 

“I know,” you whispered. 

“You know nothing! You are a fool! Is this the reason you have turned down multiple proposals over the last three years? I wondered why all those eligible men never-but- for heaven’s sake,” her fingers gripped the tablecloth in rage as she stared at you. “To go so far as to destroy your own prospects?” 

“I thought… if my prospects were not quite so attractive….” 

Your mother whirled around to face Jeonghan. “And you! Did it not occur to you to talk your sister out of this damnable courtship instead of encouraging her foolishness and enabling it?” she demanded. 

“Mother, you cannot blame Jeonghan for everything-” 

“Why not? He is the man of this household, he is responsible for safeguarding the virtue of his sisters-” 

Jeonghan sighed and let his shoulders slump forward with exhaustion. “Madam. My sister's virtue is perfectly safe. But believe me when I say that she could hardly find a man more trustworthy or devoted to her than Mr. Choi."

Your mother looked more and more distressed as she realised that this was serious, that you and Jeonghan and Mr. Choi had been keeping up this charade for years now. She slumped against the chair and looked up at you with a defeated expression. 

"You are making a mistake," she whispered. 

You blinked back your tears. "Mother, I love him. And I love you as well. I know you have my best interests at heart, but please. Please allow me to make this decision for myself."

"He has a son-"

"A son whom I will love as my own."

She shook her head. "You are a fool. You are a blubbering fool, you will destroy your younger sister's prospects if you insist on making this unseemly match-"

"Then I will wait. I will wait until Mina comes out in society and is married, and only then will Seungcheol and I marry."

"That could be years."

"I have already waited three years. A few more will not kill me."

Your mother looked at you with an unreadable expression and then clenched her fists before standing up. She seemed to have reached some form of silent resignation. “Well. If you have arranged everything for yourself then I hardly see why my presence is required here. I shall retire for the evening. Do not follow me.” 

Your mother stood and left. You were left alone with Jeonghan in the large dining room. Your knees felt weak- it was incredibly painful to be forced to reveal years of deception to your mother, but at the same time you felt as though an enormous burden had been lifted off your shoulders. You looked up at your brother shakily. 

“Jeonghan…” 

“Well, it is what it is,” he told you gently. “She had to find out someday.” 

“Not like this.” 

“Go to bed, sister. You must be tired. We will speak in the morning.” 

You swallowed and nodded. 

—----------------------------------------------------------------

The sunlight streaming through the sheer curtains woke you the next morning- you had slept fitfully all night and had a headache. One of the maids came into the room and hurried to your bedside. 

“Miss Yoon- you must awaken! Mr. Choi Seungcheol has come to call unannounced this morning, and he is sitting in the breakfast parlour with your mother and brother!” she insisted. 

You sat up. 

“What?” 

“Hurry- you must dress!” 

You felt light-headed and allowed the maid to quickly help you dress and make you presentable. Once you had composed yourself you hurried down to the breakfast parlour, where you found your mother and brother just finishing their breakfast- and Mr. Choi Seungcheol sitting at the table with a cup of tea in front of him. 

You swallowed nervously. “Mr. Choi-Seungcheol- what… what are you doing here?” 

Seungcheol gave you a gentle smile but it was your mother who spoke up. 

“He came to seek my blessing to make you an offer,” she told you tightly, while tearing some of the crust off her toast. “I will not pretend I am happy about this. I have put far too much effort to let you throw yourself away and marry beneath you. But considering how long you lot have kept up this charade and how many men you have already refused, I am no longer confident in my ability to persuade you to marry another man.” 

Your heart leapt. “Mother…” 

“You will not marry now,” she ordered firmly. “You will be quiet and announce your engagement only after Mina is wed. I won’t have your foolish decisions destroying your younger sister’s prospects. She deserves the best she can have.” 

You nodded. “Of-of course.” 

“And Jeonghan, you will immediately correct any misconceptions the ton may have about the dowry your sisters are to receive.”

Jeonghan smiled. “Of course, madam.” 

“Then,” your mother replied as she dropped her toast back onto her plate and rose from the table. “It is settled. I will count on your continued discretion, Mr. Choi. I will not have my daughter’s honour questioned and I trust you will not take unnecessary risks or liberties until I have secured a husband for my younger daughter.” 

Seungcheol stood calmly and bowed his head. “You have my word, madam.” 

Your mother left the room before you could stop her. Jeonghan stood as well, and gave you a gentle smile and a reassuring pat on the arm before leaving the room so that you could be alone with Seungcheol. Your lover came towards you and took your hand. His dark eyes met yours hesitantly.  

“Perhaps that could have gone better- but I imagine it also could have gone much, much worse,” he admitted.  

You bit your lip as you looked up at him. “How did you know?” 

“Jeonghan sent word of what occured last night. I thought it was about time I stopped hiding behind this clandestine affair like a child and brought myself to face your mother. She is not wrong to have her fears, my love. I thought it was my responsibility to try and convince her that her daughter would be safe and loved with me.” 

“I… I….” 

“It’s all right, darling. Come here.” 

Seungcheol took you into his embrace. His strong arms encircled you firmly and you pressed your cheek to the soft fabric of his coat. This sort of intimate touch was rare, and as you wrapped your arms around him you realised that you were one step closer to becoming his wife, to being able to embrace him and feel him close to you like this every single day. 

Seungcheol leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to your hair. 

“I am sorry that we must wait longer,” he said to you gently. “I know it has already been so long. But your mother is right, we should not do anything that would jeopardise Mina’s debut in society next year. Your sister deserves the very best.” 

You nodded into his shoulder. “I know.” 

“Can you wait for me a little longer, my love?” 

“You are lucky,” you told him with a smile as you looked up into your handsome lover’s dark, smouldering eyes, “that patience is not a virtue I lack.” 

“I love you, my darling.” 

“And I you.” 

Seungcheol brought his hand to your chin and tilted your head up before pressing a soft, chaste kiss to your lips. It was more than you had ever dared to do before- but in the safety of your home with no fear of being seen, it was a liberty that Seungcheol could not resist taking. You closed your eyes and let out a soft sigh against his lips. 

“Do you mean to steal my virtue before we are even formally engaged, Mr. Choi?” you teased him lightly as he pulled back, his dark eyes still focused on your soft lips. 

Seungcheol smiled. “I suppose I shall try to make do with the heart I have stolen for now.” 

You smiled and embraced him once more. 

It would not be easy, you thought to yourself as you melted into his arms. But you would wait as long as you had to, for a chance at a lifetime with Choi Seungcheol.

---------------------------------------

A/N: Thanks to anyone who made it this far reading! I know this wasn't totally complete (in the sense it didn't go all the way up to their getting married) but I'm thinking of maybe showing that in a spin-off story through the eyes of another character? Does anyone want to see what Jeonghan's been hiding behind the scenes here, or maybe experience this world through the eyes of either Mina or Mrs. Hong? (or just a totally different member that didn't show up here?) Feel free to hit me with thoughts.

#seventeen #s.coups #choi seungcheol #seventeen fanfiction #seventeen fluff #s.coups fluff #s.coups angst #seventeen scenarios #s.coups x reader #seungcheol x reader #regency!au #fluff #seventeen reactions

[cheolism]

for you, the world

seungcheol x gn! reader

summary: feeling as though seungcheol's feelings towards you had changed, you confront him.

wc is approx 2.4k

genre: angst and comfort. idol au.

warning/notes: a reference to the feeling of being choked. depression and anxiety from both cheol and the reader. mentions of depression and anxiety. serious discussions of feelings, feeling vulnerable, being honest even though it's scary.

request: how do you think scoups reacts when the love of his life asks him to love her more than she loves him

author: i realized you wanted a reaction and not a oneshot too late!!! but here's the requested reaction

You were twisting your hands, wringing your fingers and scraping your nails against your skin. You refused to look at Seungcheol, staring at his feet where he still wore the sneakers he had hurriedly put on before going to practice that day, having had no time to do much else after waking up late.

It wasn't hard to see the weariness on your face, not when you held your body away from him, as if he was a stranger you were about to bare your heart to and not the man you've been dating for four years.

You were wearing mismatched socks. Your sweats were uneven, one leg having rolled up to your knee and the other bunched loosely around your ankle. The hoodie was his, and Seungcheol knew that if he were to press closer he would be able to smell his cologne.

"Baby," Seungcheol began, hesitant.

You shook your head roughly, cutting him off. "Wait. Let me get all this out first. I'm trying, Cheol, it's just -- it's hard."

He nodded. Seungcheol smoothed his hands over his pants, trying to rub off the sweat that had begun to collect there. He would be lying if he ever tried to say he wasn't an anxious person, but concerning your relationship? Seungcheol always thought navigating your relationship was like sailing a under the brilliant sun, using its brightness as a guide.

But all of a sudden he felt as if the sun had given to darkness and rain, thunderclouds cracking overhead and stirring the sea; he was in uncharted territory, and he felt as if time was beginning to work against him.

You took a deep, shuddering breath, composing yourself. "I'm just -- it's hard. Being honest. Not in the way that people think. If someone asks me my opinion on something I'll give it, but this. Being honest like this is hard."

That's what Seungcheol liked about you. You were honest. It dripped off of you just like your sweetness did, just as thick as honey. You were honest with your words, but with your expressions moreso. More than once, when Seungcheol pointed out a certain look or expression you got, you would explain that your face was your weakness; even if you had ever managed to tell a lie, your face would give it away.

But this honesty, the honesty you were trying to give to Seungcheol, was different. It wasn't telling Minghao that his brightly colored outfit wasn't coordinated, no matter how Minghao would try to convince you otherwise. It wasn't your look of disgust when Mingyu tells a joke that doesn't land.

It was the honesty of taking your soul out of your chest and revealing it. It was showing someone the deepest, darkest thoughts that lingered in the back of your mind, in hidden corners that no sunshine could ever reach.

It was, Seungcheol knew, the same honesty that had him calling you at three in the morning, sobbing, as he felt his depression grip him around the throat and squeeze to the point of no return.

So he was still and silent, observing you. Letting you speak.

"I think --" you tried once, twice, voice and heart rebelling against one another. "I feel. I feel, wrongly, horribly, that -- that you don't love me anymore."

For a moment Seungcheol didn't understand what you were saying. It was like when someone suddenly speaks about something that happened long ago, a veil of fog over the memory before it was revealed.

But then the accusation filtered through his ears, through the fog. It pierced through his brain and landed in his heart, digging into it, puncturing.

He opened his mouth immediately to protest. Seungcheol loved you. He loved you.

When he was younger and still bright-eyed, when he sang about first loves and flower paths, when it felt like it was him and his members against the world, Seungcheol hadn't really taken much stock in the words he sang. They were words that Jihoon so eloquently wrote, each holding the considerable weight of their future success and whether it was worth it -- whether Seventeen was worth it. But they were words.

But then he met you, dated you, fell in love with you. And he understood what it meant when they sang about feeling clumsiness around a crush, when he had the irresistible urge to tell you about his adoration for you. Every single word he ever rapped or sang seemed to have made sense. Every single word, from the first ever song to now, was for you. It was all for you, even if he didn't know it at the time.

And now --

Now you were saying --

"I know -- I know what you'll say," you rushed on, having seen his bewildered look. "I know it. Seungcheol, I know you love me. I know it. I know, I know, I know.

"But at the same time --" Your voice cracked, and you turned your head sharply. Your arms moved to cradle yourself, squeezing your shoulders. "At the same time I have this voice. This thought. And of course I was able to ignore it, for the longest time I did. But now --"

Seungcheol watched as you took one deep breath, lungs filling. You held it for three seconds; released. You did this twice more, eyes squeezed shut, shoulders rising and lowering.

He immediately recognized it as something he taught you. He had researched ways to soothe oneself and had stumbled upon this breathing technique. Seungcheol remembered your wide eyes as you looked up at him, awed with how well it worked.

"Now," you said, voice calmer. You still didn't look at him. "Now it's like you don't even want to be around. Around me. You get home late from practice, getting stuff to eat with the guys after. And that's fine! Of course it's fine for you to hang out with them, of course it's fine for you to hang out with your friends. I'm not saying that. I'm not.

"But you come home late, past the time I can stay up because of work. And then I wake up and you're still asleep. And on the weekends you wake late, because you're exhausted, of course. But you wake up late and have no time for anything other than a shower and a meal before you go running off to practice. And it repeats."

You reached up, rubbing at your nose. You had been crying, Seungcheol realized. "Or you go and hang out at Hybe with the boys. And I can't go there. You know that. Or hang out with them and their friends, their expensive and shiny friends, and you know how I am with strangers. You know what it's like to be the only dull thing in a room of shining people."

And he did. Fuck, he did.

"You don't even text me," you cried, your voice finally giving out. Your hands went to your cheeks, furiously rubbing. Seungcheol wanted to cross the room to you in that instant, to take you into his arms and press kisses to your forehead and tell you to save it, that surely this conversation could wait for another day.

But he knew it couldn't.

Not when you were crying over it, not when it was so obviously driving you to exhaustion worrying about it.

"I text you all the time. I text you about every single fucking thing that makes me laugh or smile because I think it'll make you happy. I tell you about whatever dog I see, about whatever kid I see running about. And you just -- you don't even respond.

"And I know the messages usually aren't about anything important. But I just -- you can't even acknowledge it?"

You took a deep breath, trying to calm yourself. But it was no use. You were sobbing. You were sobbing like your heart was breaking, and Seungcheol knew his was.

"It's like you won't even acknowledge me," you sobbed, chest heaving. "You won't even look at me, it feels like!

"Seungcheol," you slapped a hand over your mouth. You weren't even stopping your tears now, not even wiping them away. It was just as bad as seeing you trying to hide them, Seungcheol thought.

It was like you were giving up.

"Seungcheol," you began again, voice thick, "why can you love me like I love you? Why can't you love me just even a fraction more than I love you?"

It was like you had been preparing him for the plunge. You put him in lukewarm weather, then cold. Each and every word of yours was preparing Seungcheol, was giving way to some horrible truth that was clawing out of the back of your mind, leaving its dark corner. But then you picked him up out of that cold water and plunged him into Arctic water, the temperature shocking him and electrifying his body.

Because nothing, nothing, could ever prepare him for that.

There were a few things Seungcheol couldn't imagine you ever saying. He couldn't imagine you ever saying that apple juice was better than orange; that football was better than basketball. Just like he never, ever, could have imagined you saying that you doubted his love for you.

It was like you and Seungcheol were standing in the rain. It was soaking your clothes, making your hair cling to your head. There was no sun, it being hidden by thick dark rain clouds. Both of you could hear the rain smacking against the pavement.

But, nonetheless, you were turning to him and saying how you liked bright and sunny days like this one.

Then, Seungcheol realized, the two of you weren't just standing in the rain. He was being pelted with it, his love so obvious for you that it seeped into his clothes and in his very being. But, even though you were standing beside him, you were holding an umbrella, protected from the rain.

You were quiet in front of him, shrinking back into yourself. You were turning your shoulders from him, clutching at your elbows as you hugged yourself. Still you were hiding your eyes from his. "I'm sorry, Cheol. I know it's ridic --"

Unable to help himself, Seungcheol was shooting off the couch. Your body was in his arms before he really realized what he was doing. He was pressing your body into his, feeling your elbows awkwardly dig into his chest, your face dig into his collar. Almost instantly your tears were soaking his shirt.

"Listen," he started, voice thick and stern. "Listen to me, baby. I have spent every day of the past three and a half years loving you. I have loved you through some of the worst fucking days of my life."

Seungcheol pulled away, his hands going to your cheeks. He wiped at your tears, your eyes shining from them. You sniffled; he echoed it.

When had he stared crying?'

"You listen to me," he said, feeling his jaw clench. He didn't let you look away, turning your face to keep his eyes trained on yours. "I have loved you even when I hated myself. Even when I didn't know how I could love anyone or anything, I loved you.

"I loved you when you showed up for our sixth month anniversary wearing that cute smile and the little cherry earrings. Remember them? I loved you when you took me to meet your grandparents, loved you when I brought you to mine and my grandpa couldn't believe how I managed to find someone as sweet and kind and clever as you to call my own.

"I loved you when you got Josh to teach you how to make bracelets so you could make one for me. I loved you when you sat with Jeonghan and made me that silly Lego flower set. I loved you when you stayed up far-too-fucking-late to FaceTime me on tour. I loved you when you got me that silly little fucking bear at the Airport Giftshop for way to much money just because you said it reminded you of me.

"I loved you when I did nothing but sit in the dark. When you would show up with food and love and just hold me.

"That doesn't just go away," Seungcheol breathed, blinking to try and see you through his tears. "I've always loved you. Always. Nothing can change that."

You burrowed into him, your hands clinging to his shirt. Seungcheol squashed you against him, feeling as if even a centimeter of space between the two of you was too much.

"I'm sorry." He licked his lips, pressing his eyes shut and laying his head on top of yours. "I'm so fucking sorry. You should never, ever, feel as if I don't love you. As if I won't fucking climb Mount Everest naked for you. As if I wouldn't give everything I am to be the one privileged enough to spend the rest of my life beside you.

"You are so important," he said. "You are so important. To me, to the members, to your family. To my family. To every single fucking person you've ever met. You are worth so much more than I could ever give. But I will spend the rest of my life giving, giving you my love and adoration."

You nodded against his chest. The two of you stood there in the dim light of your living room, arms wrapped around one another. Seungcheol sighed, squeezing you.

"I will send you texts every fucking minute of every hour," he vowed, as if such a thing could mend your broken heart and erase the past hour of tears. "I'll send every bird, dog, cat, mouse -- everything. I'll make you show up to every after-practice dinner. I'll drag you out of the apartment in pajamas if I have to. I'll wake up bright and early and make you a gourmet breakfast."

"No, you won't."

Seungcheol laughed weakly. "You're right. I can try, though." "I'll appreciate whatever you give me," you murmured into his clothes, voice still small and weak from crying. "Even a bowl of cereal."

But you didn't deserve a bowl of cereal, Seungcheol thought. You didn't deserve a text every minute, didn't deserve a picture of every fucking animal on Earth. You didn't deserve dinners after midnight, didn't deserve omelets or bacon or sausage.

You deserved the world.

And Seungcheol would spend the rest of his life giving it to you.

#svthub #svt angst #svt fic #svt oneshot #scoups angst #scoups fic #scoups oneshot #s.coups angst #s.coups fic #s.coups oneshot #my writing #choi seungcheol #scoups #s.coups

[miabebe]

The Legend of The Sea |Epilogue |

"You're crying? You must be turning human, the MerFolk don't cry."

"Of course we do. Why do you think the Sea is nothing but salt?"

Pairing: Choi Seungcheol × reader

Genre: Heavy Angst, Romance, Implied smut

Word Count: 4K

A/n: It's finally here! I felt the angst level in the original fic was too high I wanted to give some closure but also maintain the bittersweet nature of their story so I tried my best, I hope its a satisfactory to you guys!

Read the fic here first!

3 months later.

Seungcheol stared at his reflection in the water.

Dark hair toussled messily in the wind, dark circles stark under his eyes. He hadn't slept in days....he couldn't.

Every time he closed his eyes he would go back to that night in his room.

You taking a step back and then another.

Your hair fluttering in the wind of the sea.

Your eyes, when you looked at him for the last time.

He just couldn't get it out of his head. The scene would play over and over and over in his head, as nightfall would turn to daybreak, forcing him out of the confines of his room, forcing him into court, forcing him into his role as King.

That was the unfortunate thing about being one - Seungcheol didn't have the time or the luxury to wallow in his own sorrows. He had a kingdom to look after and people to protect. That meant everyday, he had to be a leader, he had to be the bravest man in the nation. It was only in the darkness of his room, standing before the window, taking in your lingering scent and the echoes of your words that he was his true self - a broken, broken man.

If there was any place that could offer him even a sliver of solitude, it was here, at the seacave. Seungcheol didn't know why he found himself here so often. Even though it was the waters that so cruelly took you from him, perhaps being close to the ocean made him feel close to you. Or perhaps because sometimes, the sea would take pity and wash up little somethings from your life onto the shore - your favourite sea weed, or the rare sea flowers you loved to talk about or those pretty pearls in the oysters.

Over the days, Seungcheol had been collecting those little tidbits, filling the cave with signs and memories of you. He had moved your favourite dresses, your favourite books, everything precious to you that was left in his possession out here. This was his haven, his sanctuary - his last reminder of you. His castle and the men in his court were unfortunately not gracious enough to entertain Seungcheol's misery - they needed him to leave you behind, needed him to find a queen, a political alliance that could strengthen the kingdom. Yet another reason Seungcheol often found himself in the presence of the ocean - even though it was taunting, it was where you belonged and where he freely belonged to you.

Today too the ocean is mocking him not so subtly, as Seungcheol's eyes fell on a little something that washed up on the shore, something he was actually quite familiar with - your seashell necklace.

Many months ago, right here, around the time day blended into night, you met him, speaking urgently. You rambled about some mission, something you had to do, something he had to help you with. Handing him this very necklace, you told him one day you'll come to Land like a blank slate and asked him to return it to you when you felt most lost - you said that it would remind you of what you needed to do when the time came. Seungcheol did not understand at all. It didn't matter though, all he had to do was just help you however he could. Your mission was his mission.

Bending down, he picked up the necklace, wondering how exactly it aided you. He had been noticing changes in you for a while by the time he returned it to you. You were asking more questions about the ocean, you were more quiet, lost in thoughts, lost in a battle with yourself. Seungcheol knew he had to let you figure things out, that's what you told him and that's what he did. By the time he came from war, the way you held onto him when he finally recovered told him something had drastically changed. Before he could even attempt to fathom what it was things had escalated - his father died, you were jailed for an assassination attempt and Seungcheol was forced to become king to free you.

Maybe if he hadn't let you go, you'd still be there, not beside him but at least he'd have the knowledge and the surety that you were okay. But Seungcheol couldn't bind you like that, he couldn't strip you of the one thing you valued the most about being in the ocean - your freedom. He had to let you go, but he didn't think you'd have gone this far away from him.

"She always manages to find a way doesn't she?"

Seungcheol stumbled back at the sound of a voice, completely taken aback. Before him was a woman who was definitely old but didn't seem it - she had a staff in one hand, and had donned clothes that made her look like she was in the waters though she was clearly floating above it. It was an apparition......this was magic - that meant she was a woman of the sea.

"The Sea Witch." She corrected his thought, pointing. "And the owner of that."

Seungcheol glanced at the necklace in his hand. "This is Y/n's."

The old lady let out a laugh, shaking her head. "I told you, she's a smart one that one. Always a step ahead, even of me." As she floated closer to him, Seungcheol did not take a worried step back. "Your lovely Y/n, she was an apprentice in my practice, all members of the Royal family are bound to work under me to understand sea magic-"

"Royal family?" Seungcheol blinked hard and fast. "Y/n.... she's....royalty?"

"Strange isn't it? Neither did you know you were in love with the youngest princess of the Sea, neither did she know she was in love with the only Prince of the land. Things would have been so different had you both known....."

"I don't understand." Seungcheol rubbed his head. "What do you mean?"

"Do you know why Y/n came to land King Choi?"

"I figured it was to kill my father-"

"The king." She corrected. "Y/n's mission was to kill the king. Did you ever wonder why?"

"I pondered about it day and night. The only explanation I could think of was...." Seungcheol recalled that fateful day. "It has something to do with my father setting sail."

"Indeed." She confirmed, making Seungcheol's heart sink in his chest. He knew that was a bad idea, he had voted against it. And with each word of the story that the Sea witch proceeded to tell him, it only made it worse.

"So...." He tried to process everything that had happened. It all made sense and also didn't at the same time. "Y/n had to kill my father or me to get back her kingdom. How did you or anyone think she could have done that without her memories? How could you expect that-"

"Was she not nearly successful King Choi?" The Sea Witch smiled knowingly. "Did you think the Hwangs would set her up to a mission that she could easily fulfill? Their plan was to tie her ancient sea magic, to ensure that she would fail in all ways possible, but your woman..... she's a warrior. She's one of the finest battle strategist the sea has ever seen and she had cleverly planned everything in her favour. That necklace...." She chuckled looking at his hands. "That is one of my most prized possessions, something she knew I would help her in exchange for and so she planted it with you and used it when the time came. She always finds a way King Choi, you see how its reached you again? How she sent me to you?"

Seungcheol stared at the seashell pendant. He had just thought of it as a pretty reminder of where you were from. He didn't know it was your secret weapon. That there was so much to this.

"And what do you want in exchange for it?" The Sea Witch stepped ahead, mistaking his wandering into the past as hesitance. "What is it that you want?"

Seungcheol let out a sad chuckle. There was only one thing he ever wanted.

"You can't give it to me." He held out his hand, returning the necklace to its rightful owner. "You can't bring her back."

"But I can."

The crashing waves were not louder than the racing of Seungcheol's heart against his chest.

"Only the dead can't be brought back King Choi. The living just need to be moved around."

The living.

"That's not possible." Seungcheol shook his head. "I know how Sea magic works, she's told me before, you just told me! I saw the sea foam myself....." He wrapped his hand around shell, its sharp edge bleeding him over a wound that never healed. "How is it possible?"

"Because of that." She pointed at the crimson of his hand dripping into the golden sand. "The Sea works in mysterious ways King Choi; magic works in mysterious ways too. When Y/n fell into the Sea that day, so did the dagger, with your blood on it. Blood for blood. I believe the sea magic was satisfied."

Seungcheol felt a ragged breath leave him. "She's.... alive?"

"Barely."

The Sea Witch waved her staff in the air, making the waters rise like a screen, the evening light behind it projecting an image. It was you, sitting down somewhere on the floor, hugging your legs, softly rocking back and forth. Your arms looked a lot thinner than usual, cheeks sunken in, eyes tired and fluttered shut.

"The Sea might have spared her but the Hwangs didn't. The mission was to kill the king. Your father died a natural death and if it had ended at that, there was nothing to argue but unfatefully, before the completion of 100 days, there was another king." Seungcheol felt his insides turn. "She failed to kill you and so she wasn't deemed worthy of the crown. When Hwangs took over, their first order was to imprison her to avoid any rebellion from her side against the new kingdom."

The Sea Witch tilted her head at him, smiling sadly. "Strange isn't it? What you did to save her was what ended up being her downfall. Fate too works in mysterious ways." 

Seungcheol swore if fate appeared before him right now, he would crush it with his bare hands.

"I'll get her back." Never before did he feel the kind of determination coursing through his veins. The image of you slowly disappeared as the sea witch lowered her staff looking amused. "I'll save her no matter what it takes."

"Y/n doesn't need your saving King Choi. She went to prison willingly." Seungcheol’s lips parted in shock. "Taking into consideration that you became King only the night before a 100 days completed, the Council of the Sea offered her one more chance to go to Land and kill you. She refused. She said she would prove her worth for the throne in the Sea itself. Sure she's benevolent, loves her people and is loyal to her kingdom, but the fact is that she was simply not trained for administration - she was no match for the Hwangs and so the Council declined her claim to the throne."

You refused to kill him. Again. Even if meant saving yourself and everything you cared about. Seungcheol was determined to do whatever it took to get you back. Unite heaven and earth if it came to it. Bring hell from underground, whatever it took.

"Then I'll get her throne back. If that's what it takes to free, I'll do it. Even if it means war. I have been working on science that would allow us to breath in water - we'll set sail, we'll fight, we'll free her, I can do it."

The Sea Witch stared at him, at his pacing agitated self, his mind going mad with just one goal.

"Do you know how magic really came to the sea King Choi?"

Seungcheol blinked, taken aback by the irrelevant question but didn't show it. "The Kangs escaped into it with the spectre of magic....." His eyes focused on the staff in her hand, words faltering as he recognised it from the faint drawings in his old books.

"Escaped?" She laughed without humour. "That's hardly the word King Choi - it was an act of love." Seungcheol frowned in confusion as she continued. "Though both families were neck deep in war, of all the people in the world, the Prince of the Choi kingdom was deeply in love with the Kang Princess. It was his love that brought the spectre of magic to the Kangs, allowing them to hide from battle. It was his love that stopped the war, separated both worlds and ensured peace and it was her love that ensured her people survived. Its her love that still keeps them alive even after so many years."

Seungcheol felt like something stabbed him in his chest as he looked at the Sea witch, grip tight over her staff, looking older than time and in her eyes he recognised the look he always saw in his own - a pining, a fruitless longing for the ones they loved. It was her, she was the Kang Princess. "Their love saved the world, you cannot allow yours to end it King Choi. You cannot declare war between two worlds over a mere desire."

Every bit of hope that had risen in Seungcheol crumbled miserably. "Is there nothing I can do? How am I supposed to just sit still knowing she's not alright?"

"Forget her Seungcheol."

" I can't-"

"Listen to me," She urged urgently. "If you don't bring war to Sea, the Hwangs will eventually bring it to Land. There's a reason the people of the Sea do not want them on the throne - they don't care for anything before power. The only strength the Sea had over Land was magic, but now with people here slowly discovering it, with people like you letting your inquisitiveness take over, the Hwangs feel threatened. So I have a solution if you're willing to listen."

Seungcheol nodded.

"Relinquish your knowledge of the Sea and as King, give me permission to take the same away from your people. I will make a deal with the Hwangs - your memories in exchange for Y/n's freedom."

Seungcheol looked at her with hope. "Do you think that would work?"

"Do you think you can do it? Forgetting about the sea would mean, forgetting about her too. You won't remember anything about her, it will be like she never even existed." She looked af him sadly. "But she will be free and she will be home."

Not having even a memory of you? All Seungcheol ever knew was his love for you, if he forgot that, what would he be but a shell of a man? But if it meant you'd be free, that you'd be safe, what else could possibly matter to him?

Seungcheol didn't remember much of what happened after he nodded. He rememebered thick black smoke rising above the forest right from the castle, prompting him to immediately get on his horse and ride towards the fire. It was his library. He watched the guards pour buckets of water to douse the flames but unfortunately it only stopped after every single inch was reduced to ashes. As Seungcheol walked in the aftermath, he racked his brains to remember what exactly was in here and if it truly was valuable or not. Considering he could barely recollect what was here, he figured it must not have been too important and sent orders for the place to be cleaned and the room to be redone. After all, the new queen would need a space of her own.

8 years later

It all began again the day you woke up on the beach.

The air was cool, the sand was hot; the seagulls were flying across the blue sky, the sound of the waves was like a beautiful melody – it was like a perfectly painted picture. It felt serene and pleasant and like home, like nothing could make this moment feel better.

Then you heard the laughter. A familiar, beautiful laughter and so this time, you didn’t hide.

Adjusting your red dress, you pulled yourself up to your feet, leaning against the big boulder and there you saw them, Seungcheol laughing at Kkuma as the little ball of fluff rolled about in the sand. The tightness that did not leave your chest the last eight years slowly began to unravel. There was so much happiness in his laughter, so much life in the way he chased his dog in the sand. It was like he had none of the pain that you were carrying for almost a decade.

Of course, he didn’t. The Sea Witch told you what happened, that he had given up all his memories of the Sea to save you. That he had given up all his memories of you. You knew that meant he didn’t pine for you the way you did for him all these years, but you didn’t think you’d see him so carefree. Something about the way your existence didn’t seem to even affect him sent a strange sadness rippling through you. Maybe coming here was a mistake. What if he had moved on? What if he got married and had a family? What if you returning made no difference to him? You could understand Seungcheol not remembering you but the thought of you not mattering to him anymore? You don’t think you could handle that; you should have never come here.

You took a step back and then another, pulling yourself away from there, pulling yourself away from him when you felt yourself knock into something that let out a small cry. You turned around to see a small boy rubbing his head vigorously, looking at you full of accusation. He looked young, like he was five or six, dressed in the finest of clothes, his hair windswept to the side. You got on your knees, meeting him at eye level to apologise when you felt yourself being knocked over into the sand by a familiar ball of white. Kkuma barked excitedly, covering your in wet licks, making you laugh, the pain in your heart slightly ebbing. Maybe not everyone had forgotten you.

“Kkuma never plays with strangers.” The young boy narrowed his eyes at you. “Who are you?”

You looked at him at a loss of words, when a shadow fell over you making you look up to see a silhouette against the sun. It's only when he crouched beside you that you could see all his features clearly - he's gotten a little old over the years but he still looks like Seungcheol. Your Seungcheol.

“You’re not supposed to be here. The beach is off limits.” He stated and you looked at him pointedly. Somehow, he understood the question in your eyes. “I’m not supposed to be here either but…. Something about the Sea keeps pulling me to it and I am the King so…”

You politely bowed, as one would to a King.

“I’ve not seen you around. Are you from out of town?”

You nodded. You didn't know what else to say to him. How could you explain the events of the last 8 years? Before you were taken away to prison the one thing you managed to do was get a hold of the Sea Witch's shell necklace and guided it to reach him with the little magic you knew. You knew it would bring her to him like it did to you, that it would offer him and explanation and a closure but the result of that ended up so much different than you had expected - you'd lost him in ways you didn't imagine.

After you were released from prison there was only one thing to do - get the Hwangs out of power. So you spent years assembling an army, figuring out the best way to crumble this empire when you received news that your sister was not in fact missing but hidden away by the Hwangs in an attempt to take over the throne. After you had successfully plotted and managed to break her free, even though the Sea Council deemed she was the best fit for the throne, the Hwangs did not surrender. Days and nights you battled, the sea was plagued with storms and horrifying events until finally one day, the hwangs fell from power, returning peace to the waters. It was only after you put your sister on the throne, made sure that the Sea was in safe hands that the Sea witch confided in you - once you gained the ability to breath on Land, you'd always have it - you could go back to Seungcheol.

And here you were, with him right before you, with nothing stopping the two of you from being together yet in his eyes, you were nothing but a mere stranger. You wondered if this was how he felt when he found you so many years ago, when you didn't look at him with an ounce of recognition. It must've hurt, like the way it was hurting now but it did not stop him from looking after you, guiding you, making you fall in love with him all over again.

"So you don't have a place to stay?"

You shook your head.

"Can you not speak?" The little boy quipped, earning a glare from the older man. It made you smile as you nodded. Things had not changed on Land.

Seungcheol eyes though wandered over you like he was trying to see through you, figure you out. They stopped at the shell necklace resting on your neck, one last gift from the sea witch before you left the ocean for good. On it engraved were the words,

"Till death do us part." Seungcheol read and you nodded, echoing his words. "Till death do us part."

He met your eyes and you wondered if be could see how much you longed for him, how much you missed him. His lips parted like he wanted to say something but was interrupted by the little boy standing in between, holding the pendant in his hand.

"Is this from the sea?" You nodded, making his eyes shine in excitement. "My father loves the sea, he thinks there's life under it! He keeps researching and studying about it everyday. Do you know? Have you seen life under the sea-"

Seungcheol pulled the child away from you, mumbling, asking him to play with kkuma who just refused to leave your side. You nearly smiled thinking about how Seungcheol somehow gravitated back to the waters but couldn't bring yourself to when the boy's words ring in your head.

"Father?" You looked at Seungcheol hoping he couldn't see how broken your heart was. Of course he'd moved on.

"I adopted him when he was really young. He was found abandoned at the steps of a church. He needed a parent and the kingdom needed an heir, so....." Seungcheol wasn't quite sure why he was explaining so much to you, a stranger. Something about the questions in your eyes just compelled him to.

"And the Queen?" Your fingers played with the sand, trying not to sound too hopeful.

"I don't have one." Seungcheol confessed. "I could just not bring myself to have one, I don't know why....."

His words trailed odd as he looked at you and that little smile dancing on your lips. God you were so beautiful, why did you make his heart clench like that? He cleared his throat, shaking his head.

"If you don't have a place to stay, you may stay in the Palace till you can arrange for you accommodation. I shall personally look after the necessities, is that okay?"

You nodded slowly as Seungcheol stood up, but this time when he held his hand to help you, you took it, with an unsaid promise to yourself and him, never to let go again.

You were going to make this man fall in love with you all over again. Just like he did.

#seungcheol oneshot #seungcheol angst #seungcheol fluff #seungcheol romance #Seungcheol smut #seungcheol × reader #choi seungcheol #seungcheol scenarios #seventeen seungcheol #seventeen one shot #seventeen series #s.coups angst #s.coups smut #s.coups fluff #s.coups

[strawberryya]

ghost in the machine

s.coups x reader

synopsis: Secrets can only be kept as secrets for so long, everyone knows this. Yet when 5.C0UP5 came in contact with someone he never should have even known existed this notion seemed as foreign as his own name. Perhaps there exists another way of life even for him, or maybe it was all a dream too big to dream of. 

word count: 20k

genre/contains: sci-fi au, AI-idol au, automaton!seungcheol, angst, smut, fluff, hurt/comfort, found family, afab and gn!reader, general smut warnings for oral and penetrative sex, nothing kinky except being eaten out while talking on the intercoms and some almost being caught moments, big fight

rating: 18+

a/n: this has taken a long time to finish, but it also turned out to be my longest fic to date and I'm a bit proud that i managed to actually complete what i had in mind :> thank you @idyllic-ghost for proof reading and for the banner !!

collab link to read the other amazing fics from @idyllic-ghosts genius collab!

Network tagging: @svthub @cultofdionysusnet @k-labels @kvanity-main

[navigation post!]

“100 years ago it was thought that the Earth, as we know it, would disintegrate. That the sun would implode and leave everything in darkness. Miraculously, it didn’t. Due to some external force, human scientists still haven’t agreed upon what it exactly was, none of the planets in our former solar system were ever destroyed. The Earth, along with the other planets, were pushed away from each other and ended up in different parts of the universe. Earth just happened to come to a solar system with alien life. At first, we were cautious, and people were prepared to fight. However, the aliens were welcoming to our planet. Those of us who didn’t die from ‘The Great Journey’ or from trying to fight the aliens, were welcomed into the new solar system. Soon enough, we had integrated completely, and we received materials and assistance from our sister planets in exchange for human labor. What humans knew of technology was very limited, but with the resources of the aliens we created artificial life forms. We named these robots Automaton, and they served as workers when humans couldn’t. Eventually, there was no need for human labor at all. To pay back for the help the aliens gave us, we used Automatons. With the extensive development of these robots, we eventually managed to create artificial sentient life. These Automatons were human-like in looks and had human consciousness, but they could not bleed and were stronger than we ever could be. At the present time, there are even different levels of Automatons. Level 3 robots are the workers, level 2 robots are the caretakers, and level 1 robots are the celebrities. The Automaton music group 53V3NT33N (SEVENTEEN) is made up of 13 members, all very talented, and all representing two human states of mind.”

Pride. It was one side of 5.C0UP5 state of mind, and he felt it often. He felt it whenever he looked at his members, he felt it whenever he performed on stage in front of blinding lights and roaring crowds, and he felt it when he looked at you.

Yet, the other side of the coin of his pre-programmed personality was what crushed him every single day. Everything he took pride in having accomplished, was completely tarnished by a single thought about your lips on his skin. The shame was unbearable. 

You had never been meant to get close to him, he was not supposed to be close to anyone. He knew this better than anyone. As the leader of 53V3NT33N he was the one to keep everyone in check. He was meant to set a good example and be the perfect level 1 automaton at all times. For years he kept his promise to everyone, he continued to avoid all things that could ruin his reputation and go against his lifelong contract which he had become bound to the moment he had been created. It hadn’t been easy, but he had taken pride in being the perfect and flawless leader for his members. 

That guilty feeling in his gut came back once again as he left the dorm with his manager. “Lookin’ good,” he heard the voice of one of his members play in his ear. J30NGHΛN stood, next to some of his staff members across the lobby, curiously looking at 5.C0UP5. “Going somewhere fun today?” he said and pushed the communication device on his chest, letting 5.C0UP5 hear his every word. 

“You’re too curious J30NGHΛN,” he said with a smile, “We’re just gonna get some pictures at a café for this week’s posts.” It was one of the few things he did a couple of times a year, even under the strict surveillance of his company and its staff. No matter what, he had to sell the fantasy of himself to millions of people all around the universe. 

“Oh, I see… have fun,” J30NGHΛN said with a tone that made 5.C0UP5 feel his fingers, the chirping sound of his voice making him conscious of his own existence in a way he despised. the damn wink didn’t help. It was as if he knew something. Maybe everyone knew? 5.C0UP5 shook his head and began walking towards the exit along with his manager. He felt his members’ curious gaze following him as he left. Maybe the secrets were beginning to take their toll on his mind. He knew he was supposed to keep his emotions in check, the overpowering of one of his programmed human states of mind would be his demise. They had told him that much. Yet again, he told himself the same words he had spent so many days and nights telling himself. Nobody knows. 

Luckily, the café that had been chosen for today was only a couple blocks away. The cold sweat that ran down his back went unnoticed by the staff accompanying him in the shuttle used by the members whenever they needed to go to filming locations and individual shoots.  

“Let’s order some smaller stuff and get the shoot over with, we don’t have all day,” one of the managers announced, making 5.C0UP5 nod with a forced smile before he went back to looking out the window. His hand fell to his side, feeling the hard outline of his phone in his pocket. 

Entrusted to him by the company, he had been allowed to have a small flip phone. It was ancient. They used to have them in the old world, but even by the start of “The Great Journey” the technology was seen as outdated. By the current standards, however, the phone he had been granted was not worth much more than the shoelace on his sneakers. To him though, it was priceless. 

He was nervous now, his hands felt clammy, and his shoulders were tense as he walked into the café along with the staff members. One of them hurried off to the counter and placed your orders while 5.C0UP5 and two others made their way towards the corner table. The young couple currently sitting at the table were quickly removed by the staff members. It was routine, nothing more than a sentence informing the couple of why they needed to get up was given before they were chased off by the staff members threatening presence. 

He would never get used to that, the way others were treated around him as he stood by, powerless to intervene. Every time he felt ashamed of being the reason the rest of the population had to accommodate whatever his company, his owners, deemed profitable. It didn’t matter if it was evacuating an entire city block to film a music video where the buildings crumbled around the members, or something as insignificant as taking over a table at a popular café. The guilt was always there. 

The young couple hastily gathered their belongings and one of the waiters came over and cleaned up the table, apologies for the mess constantly pouring from their lips. Level 3 automatons could get fired for something like this, but at the same time, 5.C0UP5 couldn’t help but feel a tinge of jealousy as he watched the worker get back to his place behind the counter. Maybe life would be better if he too was a lower-level automaton, he found himself thinking as he sat down and was served the beverage and piece of dessert that the staff had ordered for him. He would be freer in a way…

“5.C0UP5, let’s go.” 

He picked up the drink in his hand, the cold from the iced drink bringing his mind away from his thoughts and back into reality where a staff member had just fixed the collar of his shirt and fixed his hair which had been ruffled by the wind. “Look over there,” the staff said as another one snapped hundreds of pictures as he moved around on his chair. The rehearsed smiles, the sip of the drink, and the way he leaned toward the camera all satisfied the staff it seemed. He was good at his job, and acting like a down-to-earth boyfriend at a café was just another part of his job. 

What wasn’t part of his job, however, was when he felt a buzz in his pocket and without a second thought spilled half his drink across his thighs, the fabric covering his knees now the color of his drink. “Oh!” he shouted, “I’m sorry. I’ll go clean up real fast and we can continue like nothing happened, I’m so sorry, I’ll fix it!” he hurried to say before any of the staff members could even comprehend the situation he had just created. Hastily, 5.C0UP5 rose from the chair and left his staff confused and shocked at the table. “Fuck- someone go watch the door, no one else can be in there at the same time he is.” he heard them say behind his back as he hurried off towards the door to the bathroom. 

There were multiple doors inside the bathroom, each leading to a small bathroom. He didn’t know where to go, he didn’t know where he was supposed to be. He didn’t need to look very far because as he approached the second door to the right it opened for only a moment and a hand pulled him forcefully through the opening. “Finally,” a person said with a smile before they kissed him passionately in the low light of the lightbulb attached to the dark mosaic tiles above the sink. 5.C0UP5 entire body heated up from within as his lips pressed against those familiar soft lips he knew belonged to you. 

He had dreamed of those very lips every night since he first got to kiss them all those months ago. “Hi,” he whispered and let the corners of his mouth turn up in the most genuine smile he had had all day. 

“Hi…” you answered and giggled softly, feeling his warm hands on your cheeks as he held you and kissed you once again, softly and as if to make you feel how much he had missed you as he held your lips locked against his. 

“Are you meeting up with that secret fuck buddy of yours?” Lana joked as you scrambled to grab your phone and keys on your way out for lunch break. 

The office supply store was empty at this hour, and you had thirty minutes until you had to be back again; the perfect amount of time for a quick meetup with Cheol. You had to be back in time to release Lana, your co-worker, and close friend, from her shift and let her take her own lunch break since your boss had deemed it necessary to have the store manned at all hours of the day. 

Or, well, 5.C0UP5 if you were fussy about things like that. That was his real name, his legal name. To you, however, he was Seungcheol. It had been months since you had called the wrong number in your hurry to order a pizza after work, starving and sleep-deprived as you were at the time you hadn’t been looking too closely at the numbers you were putting into the keypad on your phone. Luckily for you, the craving for pizza that night had led you to discover something new that you soon began craving much more and much more often - him. 

His enchanting voice had caught you off guard that first night, and his confused and cautious “Who is this?” had, incredibly enough, been the starting point of you two talking every chance you got since then. Late nights chatting away on, what you have to admit were very sketchy websites, and the occasional call which was made with hushed voices and both of your hearts pounding away, had been most of your relationship. It sometimes felt like an imaginary relationship, since no one could know who he was, and even more importantly -  know who you were to him. 

“He’s not my fuck buddy, he’s…” you retorted. 

“See, do you even know what he thinks you two are? You won’t even show me any pictures of him, is he super ugly or something?” Lana shouted as you hurried towards the back door. 

“Shut up! I’ll see you later!” you yelled and the door slammed shut behind you. The back alley was filled with trash and scrap metal. The teenage boy from the large family who lived atop the store was smoking as he kicked bolts around on the ground. He looked up as you passed, and an uncomfortable feeling in your gut appeared as you felt him watch you while you exited the back alley and went onto the bustling street. Your phone buzzed in your back pocket and you fished it up. 

Unknown. 12.31.

“I’ll be there in 10, leaving now.” 

It was from Cheol. You wouldn't be getting any more updates from him until tonight, at least he had confirmed that he would be coming. Quickly you deleted the text from your phone and put the phone back into your pocket as a strange sense of being watched made the skin on your neck prickle. You looked around, moving your shoulders as if to shake the feeling away. 

You hurried away and towards the café, the uncomfortable feeling still haunting you as you entered the café and headed straight to the restroom. 

Would he come this time?

You could never be certain. He always did his best to keep his promises, but if the circumstances wouldn’t allow him to leave the group of managers that always circled him whenever he stepped outside the shiny company doors, keeping you a secret was more important. It didn’t hurt any less whenever he stood you up though. 

Knowing that his reasons for acting as he did were because of his status as a level 1 automaton had shaken you to the core at first, but it had also been a relief. He had told you who he was after a couple of weeks when you had become convinced you had accidentally begun an affair with a married man, he had been forced to confess his real identity. At least you weren’t a home wrecker, was the thought that helped you reconcile with the fact that he would never be free to live a normal life with you. 

Now you were seated on the toilet seat cover, your ear pressed to the door, your hand on the handle ready to pull it open. Time moved slower than usual, but your heartbeat was racing along with your mind. 

Then you heard him, it was undeniably his voice that made its way past the music, chatting, and the coffee machines. He was coming to you. You could barely hear when he opened the first door into the restrooms over the sound of your blood rushing in your ears. Without a second thought, you opened the door enough to register the man you had thought about all too often lately and pulled him by the arm inside the small bathroom you had occupied. His biceps tensed as you pulled him and your body lit on fire because of it. God, he was so wonderfully big. Everything from his biceps to his cock was just so perfectly huge, and you went mad any time you thought about it. You kissed him in a passionate kiss, pressing your entire body against his. You fit so well together, his hands on your face and yours wrapped around his body. 

You wanted more, you wanted all of him, all the time. You wanted to cry because you knew you couldn't have him. With tears pricking your eyes you let Seungcheol pull back to look into your eyes. 

“Hi,” he whispered and smiled. You said hi back softly before the excitement and the giggles overtook your lips. You kissed him again, this time he saw to it that it was a soft and gentle kiss. A small wince left your throat, making Seungcheol quickly turn on the faucet, hoping it would drown out any noises. “Sorry,” you mumbled against his plush lips. 

“Don’t worry, it’s partially my fault,” he said pridefully. 

You were about to laugh, but instead, you pushed up his shirt, exposing his perfectly sculpted upper body to your touch. “Fuck you,” you said under your breath. 

“‘Fuck me please’ is what you meant, yeah?” he cockily corrected you without missing a beat, flipping you both so you stood with your back against the wall he had been facing away from. You gasped as he lifted you off the ground with the wall helping to pin you between his stiff cock and the cold and hard wall. 

He was right, even though you hadn’t allowed yourself to get your hopes up, you had been feeling unusually needy lately. The thoughts of him filling you up in any way constantly on your mind, you were already turned on as you entered the café with the small promise of him setting foot in there to meet you later. 

“Please, fuck me,” you gasped out, feeling your arousal soak your underwear at the thought of his girthy cock inside of you. “I need you to be quiet,” he mumbled against your lips. 

At this, you nodded fervently. Finally, you would feel him stretching you open again, bruising your insides with the force of his strokes like you had dreamt of after every single time you had managed to get together like this before. The moments were rare, but you made the most of the short time you had, to say the least. 

His tongue quickly found yours as he ground you on his erection, eliciting a low moan and making you open your mouth for him to enter. Warm hands wandered your body, his gentle touch making you swoon as he held you with so much love, while the promise of him fucking you like the slut you were hung in the air. 

A knock on the door, and both of you froze up, his bulge pressing right on your clit making it unbearable not to move. You winced only slightly as Seungcheol’s lips left yours, deciding to put your now lonely lips to use, kissing down his jaw and neck with soft little pecks and nibbles. “What?” Seungcheol asked over the sound of the water running, his tone a bit more agitated than he had intended. Not that he was at fault, he had a soaking cunt begging to be fucked right above his cock, and lips that made him go insane on his neck; someone disturbing him right now was not what he needed. 

“How much longer do you need? We don’t have all day to wait around for a pair of pants to dry up.” the staff member on the other side of the door said, earning a sigh from Seungcheol. 

After a moment of silence, he groaned and shouted towards the locked door. “Yeah, yeah, you’re right, I’ll be right out.” 

No, you thought, your limbs holding onto the man who you had just only gotten a taste of even harder than before. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. 

“I need you to be patient for me until next time, can you be good for me and wait?” he mumbled against your hair, your lips still attached to the skin right below Seungcheol’s collar. “Yes,” you said against his neck, letting go of his skin in favor of burying your face in the warmth of his chest. He put you down on the floor, his arms releasing the back of your thighs and instead wrapping around your body. For just a moment he held you close until the buzzing of the dryer died out and he loosened his hold on you. 

You pressed your body against the wall as Seungcheol unlocked the door and disappeared through it just as quickly as he had been pulled in through it. 

“Sorry, it didn’t come off.” you heard him say through the doors. 

“We can’t get the shots if you’re all messed up like this, let’s tell the crew that we’re going back instead. Come on 5.C0UP5.” The staff member who had been just a few steps away from you two while they waited outside the restroom door responded as the voices got fainter and blended into the sounds of the café. 

You sat in silence with your hand on the door handle as his voice disappeared completely. In the beginning, you had enjoyed the thrill and noncommitment of him not being able to be there to be an actual boyfriend because of his work and position in life, you recalled as you felt all the emotions in your body dissolve into nothing. 

A small pain in your chest was the only thing left. The late-night thoughts you whispered in the dark, and the messages you had sent each other that contained your deepest yearnings and your worst fears. They had gotten to you, and it didn’t help that whenever you got a taste of having him physically there with you, you rarely- never- wanted to let go. But you always had to. 

“Enough wallowing, this isn’t changing anything,” you mumbled as you wiped your face from the wetness that had seeped from your eyes without you noticing. You needed to hurry back to relieve Lana from her shift you realized as you checked your watch, seeing that you were already supposed to be back at the store. 

You didn’t waste much more time after that, hastily making your way out of the bathroom, checking behind you as you left the café to make sure nobody had paid any attention to you. Like a punch in the gut, the feeling of being watched returned as your eyes landed on a dark-clad figure staring at you through the shop window. He had no reason to follow you with his gaze as you hurried across the street, away from the café, away from the gut-wrenching feeling that something was awry. 

He wasn’t looking at you, right? You were just getting too paranoid, that’s all, right? 

5.C0UP5 had been daydreaming the entire way back to the company, his mind taking him back to the moments he could hold you in his arms. His body couldn’t ache for you, but his mind almost had him believing that he did. Some days, he almost believed himself to have a heart. A heart that broke each time he had to leave you behind. 

It wasn’t until he got back to the dorms where he got a glimpse of his members, and friends since he had been put into this world, that he finally felt himself come down back to reality. They were everywhere, some he saw in the lobby along with their hoards of staff members just like his own. Some were in the dorms, sleeping, or at least in a state of being that looked like sleeping as they charged. 

Others were nowhere to be found, not that he went looking. They could mind themselves, he knew they would never do anything to make him less proud of them. To 5.C0UP5, he was the bigger worry. 

He was just about to let himself rest and recharge, to try and forget the pain in the back of his mind, haunting him even as he saw his members wandering the dormitories and the company hallways. You were always in the back of his mind, no matter what he did to try and forget. Somehow, he had accidentally let you in, and now you were half his world. The hidden side of the moon, the side which should always remain in darkness, no matter how closely you look. 

A staff member who had left him just minutes ago as they entered the guarded company building came back, not even bothering to knock before they entered the room in which 5.C0UP5 sat on his bed. “5.C0UP5, you need to follow me, the CEO has something to talk to you about.” 

It had happened before, he met with the CEO every once in a while. After all, he was the spokesperson for the group, even if they didn’t have many (any) rights, they still needed to have someone to be their voice. This time, however, the meeting wasn’t scheduled. The CEO wanted to have an impromptu meeting with him… his hand unconsciously fell against his left side pocket, worry filling his mind even though he tried to make sense of why he had been called in to talk to the management. 

Even as he entered the large office of the CEO he had been in more times than he could count, something felt off. People he had never met sat in chairs all around the walls. Guards stood at the door, looking more tense than he had ever seen them before, and the CEO himself had the strangest expression he had ever worn. 5.C0UP5 waited until he was spoken to, as he had been instructed so many times before. Honoring the one who made sure he had the comfortable life he currently had was something he had been taught from the very first day he had opened his eyes. 

“Hello 5.C0UP5.” the suit-clad man in the dark chair said. He spoke calmly, but not kindly. 5.C0UP5 picked up on his tone immediately. 

“Hello, Sir,” he answered and bowed his head ever so slightly, his eyes never leaving the man in front of him. The room was dark, but the photos splayed out on the desk in front of the CEO finally caught 5.C0UP5’s eye. He could recognize them even at this distance and brightness. His head worked ceaselessly to find the moment it had begun, the moment they had found out. Because in front of the CEO, he could spot hundreds of pictures of the one person he wished they would never even see: you. 

All that went through 5.C0UP5’s mind when he realized what had finally happened was fuck.

“I understand that you have been seeing this human for a while… did you think we wouldn’t find out?” the CEO said, almost laughing at him as he sat in his chair looking over the pictures, each one containing your face, at work, at the café from earlier that day, at home. They had you right under their nail, ready to remove you from the planet at any second. He wanted to scream. 

The CEO cleared his throat before he threw the photo he held in his hand on the glass desk in front of him. “Now, unless you want us to eliminate this problem of yours, you will be rebooted first thing tomorrow.” 

5.C0UP5 knew he wasn’t supposed to protest, he wasn’t even supposed to think anything other than “Yes, Sir,” but before he could stop himself he spoke his mind. 

“Please, no… Why would you do that? It doesn’t make any sense. If I’m found breaking the rules, I’m to be demoted, not- not this!”

“Seventeen is currently the galaxy’s top band 5.C0UP5, and you are their leader, you have an image to uphold. And since you failed at doing this, we want to reboot your system, that way you will be able to stay and your group members' reputations won’t be tarnished, and most importantly. This little issue will be resolved because you won’t even remember this little human.”

The CEO wasn’t smiling as he had thought before, the CEO had never once smiled. His eyes were dead, nothing more than a ghost of a human left inside of him. At least 5.C0UP5 felt something, at least he could smile, at least he could love…

He could love. He had felt it. So why was he about to get punished for something his management swore he couldn’t feel? Hoped he couldn’t, might be more accurate, 5.C0UP5 realized. 

“How did you know?” he asked, the glare he received was enough that the management had begun running out of patience for him already. 

“Does it matter? We know everything about you.” the CEO answered curtly. 

Just like that the pieces fell into place, they had known all along. He felt the piece of metal that clung to his chest like a stone, stuck in his body and destroying him from within. They had known all along… The upcoming release of their new comeback was what they were worried about, he soon realized. They had hoped he would stop of his own free will, after all, he had the personality trait of shame. He should’ve already ended whatever he had with you. 

However, he hadn’t. And now it would become an issue if they didn’t handle it quickly and quietly. 

Despite that, the thought that overpowered all others at that moment wasn’t about how small he felt as he realized the true power the company had over him, or how much he loathed the people who thought they had a right to control him. He could love. That was the loudest, and he wanted to scream it, make everyone hear him just this once. It made him proud, he could do something this human was incapable of, and now they wanted to take that away from him. No. There was no way he was going to let them do that to him as well. He clenched his fist at his side, should he fight? 

“You can return to your rooms, they will come to get you soon,” the CEO declared and pushed the photos on his desk off the table, straight into the trash can underneath. 5.C0UP5 fists relaxed a bit, a new plan forming as he turned to leave the room with the stern guards following along. “Oh,” he heard the CEO say, “and leave the phone, you are no longer trusted to keep it with you even in case of emergencies. I hope you understand… you won’t need to understand in a bit.” 

His jaw was frozen in place as he took the phone from his pocket and threw it towards the CEO. The guards jumped forward to grab his arms as the phone crashed into the table and tipped over a cup of metal pens that scattered all across the floor. “Leave us,” said the CEO without even flinching. 

5.C0UP5 didn’t feel any shame as he was dragged out from the dark office, suit-clad strangers watching him with cold eyes as the doors slammed shut behind him. He was dragged until they were in the hallway where the crossroad between freedom and forever forgetting you were. “I can walk by myself,” he said with a growl he had never heard in his voice before. The guards let him stand alone, watchful eyes on him as they began walking again, one in front of him and one behind him now. It’s now or never, he thought, taking the shot as he saw it arise in front of him. 

His mind barely registered the hands that tried to grab onto him, all his focus lay on the doors in the lobby and on getting there. He ran with all his might until he crashed into the doors that were too slow to open. The crack widened and he pushed himself out of the glass doors that opened just in time for him to keep staying ahead of the guards. Bright lights in all the colors of the rainbow lit up before him as he began running down the crowded streets. His eyes watered because of the wind, and the lights blurred into a kaleidoscope of light. 

His body was designed to be agile and strong, he was designed to keep moving. Right now that felt like the biggest blessing he had ever received in his cursed life. 

From the back of his mind, two things arose. The first was your apartment, he had only heard about it, you had described exactly how to get there in one of the late-night calls you had whispered to each other weeks ago. The second was those twelve faces which were all he had known for so long; his members would be left to deal with it all when he was gone. He knew them so well, and yet, none of them had even had a chance to become someone to get to know. He wanted to give them a chance. As he ran he shouted out the word “Run!”, pressed that button he had used so many times before in the middle of the device connected to his chest, and began tearing the peace of metal from his body. It took him a few tries before he managed to rip the entire thing off of his skin. It hurt more than he had imagined, the pain was brain-numbing and overwhelming. He almost had to stop, the pain making it hard to focus on making his legs move forward. 

Nevertheless, he was free, the tracker was gone from his body, and with it was his only connection to the only family he had ever known. 

He ran, and he didn’t stop running until he arrived at your apartment. They would know he was here, they knew everything. He needed to be quick. He ran up the stairs to your apartment, knocking aggressively on your door, shouting as loudly as he dared for you to open the door. It wasn’t long until the door swung open and he was close to tears as he saw your very shocked face looking back at his panicked state. The thing you had imagined, but since you had found out his true identity, always known would never happen, had happened. 5.C0UP5 was tired, but he needed to get away, and he wanted you to come with him. 

“We need to leave, they’re coming for me. Please come with me,” he pleaded, his eyes begging you as his hands held your arms desperately. 

“What did you do?” you said breathlessly. 

“They were going to make me forget, make you… erase the issue… I couldn’t let them take this away from me too.”

You were speechless. “You ran.” He nodded. You didn’t even bother to say a word as you ran into your apartment, leaving 5.C0UP5 at the door. He had no idea if you were trying to find somewhere to hide or looking for something as he heard crashes and your voice shouting curses from further inside your small place. He needed to get out of there, but maybe… holding out hope was worthwhile it turned out. Minutes later, which felt like hours for 5.C0UP5, you reappeared at the door, backpack in hand and sweat gracing your hairline. You were running with him. 

It wasn’t a hard decision, you weren’t close to your parents, and Lana would understand eventually… at least you hoped your coworker, and only close friend at this moment of your life, would understand if you ever survived to tell her and apologize for leaving without a word. 

A small pain stabbed at your heart, leaving everything for an automaton on the run. Everything you had ever known for this man… It felt insane at the moment, and it felt even more insane as you felt Cheol squeeze your hand which you had been holding since you took it, and began running towards the docks. You sat in the cold of the night on a hard bench next to Cheol. In a bit, a ship would arrive. Crowded places felt like a good idea at first, but now, the paranoia set in. Was that old man over there looking a bit too long at Cheol? Didn’t those surveillance cameras follow them as they walked onto the docks? 

The hand in yours pressed gently against your skin, helping you stay at least a bit sane as the weight of what you were doing was already beginning to tug at your strength. You thought it best to focus on the plan instead. 

“Let’s get on this ship, hop off at the airport, and get on another ship there. That way we can get off this planet because the sooner the better right?”

“Yeah, but don’t you think they will be looking for me at all the docks and airports?” Cheol said quietly. 

He was right of course, they would be looking for the escaped automaton at all the exits of this world they could think of. 

“Maybe if we…” You tried, but you didn’t know how you would get away if his company's staff members were to hunt them down anywhere on the planet. “Damn. Do you know that it’s incredibly difficult to go on a trip with you?” you deadpanned. The moment was horrible, but also perfect. It made Cheol smile, something you hadn’t seen the entire way from the moment you opened the door until now. 

It helped keep your mind off of the horrible situation and the impending doom. 

“It is,” he chuckled, “I never thought it would become an issue though.”

“But here we are,” you said and sighed. Cheol leaned against you, his large arm pushing against your side, making a smile split across your face. 

“I don’t think we should get on one of the commercial airlines… we need something more private,” Cheol mumbled.

“How would we get a hold of a ship of our own? We don’t have the money for that…” 

“We’ll figure it out…” 

“We have a lot to figure out from now on, Cheol,” you said and let your head fall against his shoulder, resting your heavy mind on his strong frame. He hummed, the sound comforting you even while you thought about all the ways you could get killed while on the run. 

The submarine came soon enough, and you both got on without a hitch. If you were being followed, they weren’t coming out of the shadows just yet. The cold light from inside the ship lit up the dark water around the underwater tracks that held the boat in place as it brought commuters across the sea each day and night. Under the high waves had turned out to be much easier than above them, especially nowadays. The storms had become worse in the last couple of centuries. Every other day there was another tropical storm on the seas. A side-effect of the universes coming closer together was what the scientists had concluded when it first began happening hundreds of years ago after the end of The Great Journey. 

You looked out the blurry window into the empty waters. Cheol and you were sitting by the back of the ship, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. You had managed to throw a cap into your backpack, which now helped hide Cheol’s face from any surveillance cameras while you used the hood of your sweatshirt to somewhat hide your face. Being a petty thief seemed like the least of your current issues. 

Neither of you spoke the entire ride, only communicating and comforting each other through a hand in the other or on their thigh. If you weren’t panicking you would probably be craving his touch in other places. That would have to wait though. A safe place was probably the priority, you decided in the back of your mind. You noticed his other hand, the one which wasn’t holding onto you like his life depended on it, continued reaching towards his neck. He seemed to be in pain. Did he get hurt? You hadn't had the time to even think about asking him how he was feeling or if he had gotten hurt by the guards or even the staff. You made a mental note to ask him later, placing your head against the rest behind you instead of his shoulder. You didn’t want to cause any more pain by resting against him. 

It was getting rather late as you left the submarine station you had gotten off at. Your heart wasn’t calming down anytime soon, you weren’t equipped to handle this kind of stress. Day-to-day, normal life stress was enough, this was something else entirely. 

“I want to live out the rest of my life in a very peaceful manner, far away from all of this crap,” you whispered as you walked the short walk from the submarine station to the spaceport welcoming hall. You wanted to be on a warm couch, not thinking about how to run away without being arrested. Right now, the idea of a living room seemed too far out of reach. All around you were tiny shops, suitcases, and the cold and unnatural light that lit up the entire spaceport’s welcoming hall. Ships that were boarding sounded out through the air, the comfy couch was as far from reality as you could get. 

Cheol scoffed, “I agree, wholeheartedly. I am never running away again after this, it’s too much work.” 

You tried to hold your laugh in, “Yeah, too much sneaking around for my taste. Let’s just run away this once, and then stay put and become that old couple on the hill that no one dares to visit.” Cheol nodded. “I would do anything for that…” Suddenly you noticed a small melancholy feeling in his words. You were just about to ask what was on his mind when he stopped your walk into the large welcoming hall, ushering you both into a small tourist shop. All you saw were miniature Earths, mugs with stupid prints, and keychains with different tourist attractions. You did not like it. For a second you were worried that he wanted to do some last-minute shopping, but your worries changed as you saw his terrified face. He had seen someone he knew. 

“I’ve seen that woman over there by the kiosk before, she usually helps backstage at our concerts. Fuck, that means they really managed to send people out to the exits,” he grumbled. This was bad. You felt your blood rushing in your veins, panic filling your mind. Had you been alone, you would’ve been frozen right about now. 

“Let’s just go,” he whispered hurriedly, panic visible on his face. “The faster we’re out of here the better, right? Are you with me?” 

“Always. Let’s go,” you whispered, the reassurance being all Cheol needed to grab your hand in his even firmer than before and head right out of the welcoming hall and out the nearest exit leading to the departing spaceships. You were unbelievably lucky as you ended up in the middle of a large swarm of travelers who were just about to board the large ship. Most were workers it turned out, the ship being part commuting area and half cargo space. The both of you managed to sneak onto the ship along with the workers, keeping your heads down as you hoped to anything that would listen that you would be able to sneak onboard undetected. 

It was unplanned, you barely even knew where the ship was headed. It wasn’t until you heard the voice that called out that the ship heading to Specus would depart that you both realized where you were heading. Specus was the mining planet, all the minerals needed for this universe to continue expanding its empire, and for life to continue as it has been until now, were found on this planet. All the people on this ship were workers there, probably coming back from their biannual leave which was granted to all humans and other living beings working there. Automatons was not included in the group of people who got any leave. The laws were clear about that, automatons were not human and didn’t need any form of vacation. 

The laws were bullshit. 

“Specus… I mean it could be worse, right?” you whispered. Cheol nodded, caught up in his thoughts. “Should we look for somewhere else to hide until we’re there?” you asked, trying to catch his attention again. Once again he only nodded, his senses all focused on his surroundings, making sure you two weren’t being followed or watched as he pulled you away from the area with rows of seating for the workers traveling with the ship. You went past the cots, knowing there was no way you could manage to stay hidden the entire way if you tried to stay in there. Instead, you made your way to the lower parts of the deck, the part of the ship where travelers didn’t wander. Here, you would only find crew members, cleaners, servers, and mechanics. The hallways were darker here, the LED lights being used more sparsely on the lower decks. You had a hard time seeing in the low light, but Cheol had your hand in his, a relaxed feeling managing to find its way into your body despite the circumstances.  

You had only managed to get a little way past the third deck when you met another person for the first time since you had left the seating area. “Are you two lost?” the man asked, making you jump and making Cheol whirl around to where the sound was coming from. You hadn’t noticed him in the dark until he spoke. 

“No, we’re just… looking for the bathroom,” you stuttered out. 

It was the dumbest excuse in the book. You knew you didn’t have the man fooled when he began laughing. It was a wonderful laugh, high-pitched and genuine. The figure stepped out of the dark, revealing a handsome man, dressed in a simple gray overall. Over his breast pocket, it said maintenance. You felt yourself growing a bit anxious as to what the laughing man would do next. Would he turn you in? 

“No, but seriously, why are you all the way down here? You two certainly don’t look like the new hires we were supposed to get this week,” the man, who you realized was holding a mop which he was now leaning on, said with a curious tone as he scanned the both of you from head to toe. “You look like a fucking idol, you know. If I didn’t know better I would think you were on the run,” he said with a smirk. 

“I’m Cheol, this is Y/N,” Cheol said finally as he nodded his head in your direction. Even in this light, you could tell he was staring at the stranger with that intense gaze that could make anyone either break down or swoon. 

The maintenance man sighed, “Alright, I’m Wooyoung. Come with me,” he said without explanation.  You didn’t follow him right away. He looked back at you, the “Coming?” visible on his face. 

“Do we trust him?” you whispered to Cheol, who was still watching the man waiting for you. 

“I don’t know about trust, but honestly what choice do we have? It’s not like we can go anywhere now, and it’s a long journey to Specus…” 

You nodded, nervousness made your hand clammy in Cheol’s firm grip. 

This was a risk you needed to take. If he was going to turn you in, it was probably better to just get it over with. At least you wouldn’t have to starve or something if you were locked up until you got to Specus. 

He led you to the lower decks, and surprisingly began introducing you both as the new temps that would help around on your way to Specus. The other crew members nodded, a few glancing rather suspiciously at you both but accepting the half-truth that Wooyoung told them. They hadn’t heard anything about any new temps, but it was none of their business it seemed. Who, and why you were there to help around didn’t matter to them.

Wooyoung led you around the lower decks, being strangely chatty with you two. You hadn’t expected someone so friendly to simply appear in your lives just as you needed it. Was he somehow your savior or was he something entirely else? You hoped he was good news because the alternative was so much worse. 

“Okay, this guy is great, you’re gonna love him. He’s not… too talkative, but he’s very good!” Wooyoung said as he took you down a flight of very narrow stairs. 

“Good at what?” You asked, minding your step so you wouldn’t fall as you descended. Wooyoung didn’t answer, instead flinging a thick metal door open and skipping inside. 

“Sannie!” Wooyoung suddenly shouted as you and Cheol entered a room after him. The room was filled from floor to ceiling with electronics. Screws, bolts, and different tools were everywhere. It looked like a mix of a car workshop and a dentist. The second part was mainly because of the chair in the middle of the room. The only time you had seen one of those was when you had gone to the dentist. By a table, a man sat on a high stool, engrossed in whatever he was doing. A bright lamp shone down on, what looked to you like, a bunch of chords in different colors. 

“What Woo? Did you get hurt again? Or are you just here because you’re bored…” San said as he was turned away from the door where you and Cheol stood, unsure of what to say and do just as you had been for the past couple of minutes. Would this man scrutinize you and Cheol as well, like the other staff members Wooyoung had introduced you to?  It seemed you had managed to bump into the most friendly maintenance member on the entire crew, and you thanked the universe for that because it seemed as if he was the solution to a lot of your current issues. He seemed to know everyone on this ship, and you hoped the friendship between him and the others would somehow be your and Cheol’s way of being allowed into the crew. 

“No… or well, yes, I am always a bit bored when you’re not around,” Wooyoung chirped, “But I’m here to see what you can do for these two.” 

Wooyoung gestured towards the door, finally bringing the new strangers’ attention to where you and Cheol stood. “Well, I’ll be damned. You brought a level 1 down here along with a human?” San said and looked between you both and Wooyoung who smiled brightly at his friend. “Yup!” 

San nodded, “Well, I can guess what happened with you two since you’re here after all… Can you work?” he asked after a moment. You nodded. “Yes,” you heard Cheol say. 

“Great. I’m San, I’m the mechanic around here. Since I’m human, and apparently that means something even in space, these fuckers also put me in charge when we leave the dock. I’ll get you what you need, food for you,” he said and looked at you, he then turned to Cheol, “A charger for you, and enough work to make sure you sleep soundly when you get off your shifts,” San declared. 

“Yay!” Wooyoung shouted gleefully, his cheerful claps making you crack a smile - despite the situation you found yourselves in. 

Cheol wasn’t smiling, but he seemed more relaxed. “How did you know I was a level 1?” was all he asked. You hadn’t reflected on it, but it was strange that he had been able to realize the difference between Cheol and you so quickly. 

San smirked, “It’s my job to know. If I couldn’t tell the difference between you and one of the workers here, I’d really be in trouble as a mechanic.” He was about to return to the mess of chords on his desk, but he looked back at Cheol, pointing towards his neck. “Also, come back here tomorrow and I’ll get that fixed for you.” Cheol’s hand reached for his neck again, the pain from touching the place his tracker had been made him flinch in agony. His shirt had fallen a bit lower while you had wandered after Wooyoung, he had opened his jacket, and now you finally spotted the area he had been protecting this entire time. The piece of metal you had avoided in your secret rendezvous was gone. He had ripped it out, you shuddered at the thought of the strength it must’ve taken to rip something like that from your own skin. You squeezed his hand to comfort and distract him, you didn’t know what else to do. 

Wooyoung came towards you, happily walking away from San who was already immersed in his work, and made it clear that you were to follow him. 

“Thank you,” you said before you left, San looking over his shoulder to give you a small smile and a ‘no worries’ expression in return. But worry was exactly what you had begun feeling, more than anything else. 

You and Cheol got a gray overall each, both saying maintenance over the breast pocket and the back, just like the one Wooyoung was wearing. “Stay in here for tonight, and when I wake you I’ll let you know what you will be doing for the next couple of weeks,” Wooyoung explained, giving you a small room in a long hallway to stay in. Everything was in the same cool metallic shade, and you realized that all you had to sleep on tonight would be a lonely pillow and a blanket that looked like it had seen better days. 

“It’s not ideal…” you stated, looking around in the small space you had been assigned as your room. “But we can make it work, right?” 

“It could be a lot better,” Cheol nodded and looked at you. You had had an affair with a famous level 1 automaton, been found out by some really powerful people, threatened to be disposed of, illegally left Earth, and had just been offered safe passage to another planet by some unexpectedly friendly people. But the room was a bit small and dark. Cheol looked at you, a smile creeping onto his face. You began laughing at the absurdity, “We should probably be more grateful,” he gasped out between laughs. “But it’s so ugly!” You shouted, your laughs getting more and more manic. 

“This is probably the stupidest thing we have ever done,” you gasped out. 

Your eyes welled, which tears that were a result of your laughing, and which were your exhaustion finally setting in was impossible to tell. All your emotions just came out all at once. You were gasping for air, tears running down your cheeks, and all the weight of your decisions crashing right into you. 

“It was, but I can’t make myself regret anything,” Cheol said, emotion welling underneath his words. But he didn’t cry. Instead, he just held you. He let you cry your eyes out, staining his dark hoodie with your tears as you sobbed. 

“Did we make the right decision?” you whispered against his chest, strong arms holding you safe as you questioned what you had done. 

“I hope so,” you heard Cheol say, the sound of his voice echoing in his body. You fell asleep in his arms for the first time that day. Having him to yourself in this way was a privilege, you realized. It was a privilege you had lived without for your entire life. You didn’t even know that you had been missing out on it until you woke up the next day, your head in his lap and his hands holding the blanket to your waist. You looked up at his handsome face, wondering if he had been able to rest where he sat against the hard wall.

It didn’t take long until you had both caught on to what you needed to do around the ship. It turned out that Wooyoung was a great instructor. During your shifts you both ran around, cleaning, and helping the regular crew members when needed. Wooyoung quickly made sure you felt at least a bit more comfortable on the ship by giving you tours around the decks and introducing you to even more of the crew members. 

The best part, however, was when you, after an exhausting day working around the large ship, got to lay down in Cheol’s lap while he charged and slept for a few hours, just feeling the heat that his body generated as you let yourself be swept away from reality. The weeks passed, and you learned the routines of the ship rather quickly. 

You barely had any time to think, let alone feel, how physically and emotionally exhausted you were. Leaving everything on Earth and trying to survive day by day on this ship in the middle of the vast universe was more work than you had hoped when you impulsively decided to leave. Some days you managed to take a moment to yourself, stopping in the middle of your step, and just staring out the small windows on the sides of the ship. The space outside was both so full of life and so empty of anything at all that you found yourself floating away in your thoughts into nothingness for just a moment. 

After a few weeks of almost nothing but work and sleep, the crew began preparing for the landing. Soon you would be on Specus, with absolutely nothing planned for what was to come. This soon changed, however, as you sat down with San to eat dinner. Cheol sat next to you, not wanting to spend unnecessary time apart from you just because he didn’t need to consume any food. 

“But, like, did you like the dancing and all that?” Wooyoung asked, the conversation had ended up being about your professions. 

“I think I did, yeah,” Cheol answered honestly. 

“I always thought I’d be a pretty good idol. If I wasn’t designated my level, I would've given it a shot for sure!” Wooyoung said, “Or well, maybe not under your company… they don’t seem that great from what I’ve heard, with the whole rebooting thing and all… that…” he trailed off. You were all staring at him. The silence was deafening, none of you truly knew what Cheol had been through. He had told you bits and pieces, but not nearly enough to know how he’d react to this. 

San and Wooyoung had become your friends since you had been sharing your meals every day. Most of the time the conversations flowed naturally, and the topics ranged from everything from San’s latest way to fix up bolts that had begun unscrewing themselves to childhood memories. Wooyoung and Cheol had a hard time joining in on those conversations, but they shared their fair share of memories from when they first gained consciousness. 

It was strange to think about it in that way, your boyfriend never had a childhood. Well, you still didn’t have a name for what you two were, and calling him your boyfriend in your mind might be jumping to conclusions, you were simply on the run with each other and had a romantic and sexual relationship with one another, but boyfriend might be going too far- Nevertheless, he had been created just as he was right now. Out of all the parts about AI that you had grown up to accept, the no-childhood part was the one you never quite could get past. He had missed something that was so fundamental to you and all other people who had been born instead of created in a factory. It made you really think about the fact that someone had created him intentionally - not just anyone, but him. 

The silence was still pressing around you as you all waited to see how Cheol would react to Wooyoung’s lighthearted comment about the idol life. Your thoughts were wandering away from you, maybe in a way of escaping reality until Cheol saved the conversation. 

“I think you would've been a great performer. You have the right energy about you,” Cheol said with a straight face making Wooyoung crack a smile. 

You were happy that he seemed okay talking about his experiences. And you were equally happy that the mood hadn’t been completely ruined because of Wooyoung’s thoughtless comment. 

After some time, the conversations died out and San picked up a new one, asking something neither you nor Cheol had any good answers to: “What will you do next?” 

You looked at Cheol. He looked just as clueless as you felt. Neither of you had a plan. “They don’t have any clue,” Wooyoung pitched in with his laugh, that you would remember for the rest of your life. You looked down, nodding slightly. It was true. 

“Where do you want to go? You don’t have any idea of where you would like to be in the future?” San asked, surprised that you didn’t have at least the semblance of a plan. 

“I don’t know much about the universe… but I want to go somewhere safe. I want to spend my life where I won’t be found and won’t be constantly watched,” Cheol answered before looking at you, “…somewhere we can be alone.”

Your heart fluttered. You had forgotten that your life wasn’t just the endless days of work on the ship. It was beyond you how you could’ve forgotten it all so fast,  but the intense look filled with love and pain that Cheol gave you made all the feelings stir up once again. You wanted that too, you wanted a place where you two could just be together. 

You nodded, concurring with what Cheol had just said, “Is there somewhere like that? Where we can stay forever?” 

Wooyoung stayed quiet but San looked at the both of you, something in his eyes telling you both that he did have an answer to what you were asking him. “Lumen. That’s where you want to go.” 

“Lumen?” you asked, never having heard of the planet before. 

San hummed, “It’s right beside galaxy 428B. They say it’s the ‘utopia of the universe’, but very few have ever managed to get there and even fewer have managed to get there and back to tell the story of it.”

“Why is that?” you continued asking, your curiosity piqued. 

Lumen had been a planet much like Earth before the entire shift in the universe had happened. It was a sunny place, filled with forests and unexplored nature. There lived some type of people, San wasn’t sure what they were called. It was far away, and the solar systems that were close together had not deemed it worth the cost of travel to create a way to commute there. If you could get there, you wouldn’t have to worry about anything but creating a way of life, San told you. He had heard about the place from travelers he met in his childhood, people who had been on a journey of their own in search of a safe haven - much like you and Cheol. 

“All I know is that you need to travel as far north from our solarsystem as possible,” he said and went quiet. “I’ve never seen those people after they left in search of Lumen, I don’t know if they ever made it.”

Cheol was deep in thought next to you. Neither of you responded to what San had told you except for a short: “Thanks, I think we should head to bed.” But even as you rested your head against his shoulder that night waiting for the exhaustion to overtake you, not a word came from the man you had spent weeks chatting within just this position. 

If you were going to find out what he thought about your destination, you would need to take the initiative you thought that night.

 “I wanna go, do you?” Your words lingered in the dark room. Silence. Soon you almost began falling asleep, your brain coming to accept that you were probably not going to get an answer out of him tonight. Your body jerked as you heard his deep voice say: “I want to come with you.” Grabbing his hand you nodded sleepily against his shoulder. 

“I love you…” you mumbled before you dozed off, leaving Cheol alone and awake in the dark with your words ringing in his ears. 

The next day Cheol still couldn’t get those three words out of his mind. Only for a moment did he think about trying to make up a plan for what you needed to do now that you had decided where you wanted to go. ‘I love you’… the thought of your sleepy voice whispering to him had him cleaning the same spot for at least twenty minutes.

You had said it first, but he didn’t even know if you meant it in the way he felt it. Did you just say it without thinking while half asleep? Were you thinking of someone else? What if you were mad that he hadn’t said it? 

He was freaking out, rubbing harder with the mop on the laminated floors. He was sure that he had messed it all up. Maybe you didn’t want to go anymore. What if you had just followed him thinking it would be a quick trip and ended up with more than you had bargained for? God, why hadn’t he said it back last night? He felt it, so why did he freeze when he heard those three damn words? 

He jumped when he felt a hand on his shoulder, “Hey,” Wooyoung stood beside him, looking at the only wet spot on the ground around them. “How’s it going with the floor?” 

Cheol looked down, only now realizing how caught up in his head he had been. “Shit, I’m sorry man.”

“No worries. Something wrong?” Wooyoung said, his hand still on Cheol’s shoulder in a reassuring manner. 

He shook his head, “Just a lot on my mind…”

Wooyoung hummed, nodding understandingly. “Go talk to each other about whatever it is, don’t just stand here doing… I don’t even know what the hell you’re doing, to be honest.” 

Cheol looked at him. He was weirdly intuitive, Cheol thought as he looked at the crooked smile Wooyoung was flashing him. He nodded, “It’s ok for me to go?” 

“Dude, just go! I told you to do so, I decide who cleans the floors and you are definitely not helping me do it, so you’re off floor duty.”

Cheol let go of the mop, his legs quickly moving away from the upper decks and down to the lower ones, towards you. He quickly found you in the kitchen, removing plates from the large dishwasher as the servers stacked the hot plates in tall piles - it looked rather dangerous as he glanced at the piles that towered over him. “Cheol?” You blurted out, surprised to see him here when he wasn’t on duty in the kitchen that day. 

“Hi, I… I wanted to see you, and Wooyong he- he said I could go and I needed to…” he paused, he didn’t actually know what he wanted or what he needed. Or well, he did know, he just didn’t know how to make it happen. 

“Come on, let’s go talk then,” you simply responded, making Cheol look at you in awe. He wondered how it had been so easy for you to say what he had wanted to say all along. You on the other hand were wondering why Cheol stood entranced in the kitchen doorway looking at you as if the words ‘let’s talk’ had been revolutionary. 

“Coming?” 

Cheol nodded and followed you back to the small back room that had been yours for the past few weeks. It was dark, but there was enough light coming in from the hallway and the tiny lamp in the corner of the room to light up the piles of clothes in the other corner, the blanket he put over you every night, and the charger that was plugged into the wall next to where he slept with you in his lap. 

The door closed heavily behind him as you leaned against a wall, wondering what it was that he felt the need to talk about, was it Lumen? “Did you change your mind?” You asked hesitantly. 

“About what?” Cheol looked scared for some reason, you didn’t know why but it made your eyebrows knit together. 

“It’s not about Lumen?” 

“No, no I still wanna go to Lumen! It’s not about that… wait, do you… not want to anymore?” 

You shook your head, “That’s not it!” You hurried to assure him. “I just thought, since that was our last conversation… you know.”

Cheol swallowed, he just needed to say what he felt. 

That was easier said than done though. The words all got jumbled up in his brain, his thoughts making his throat go dry, he just wanted you to know without having to tell you. You couldn’t read his mind, but he wanted you to feel it. He wanted you to feel how much, how deeply he loved you. He took a step towards you, your arms wrapping around him without a second thought. You pulled him close, chuckling at the thought that he had just wanted some kisses. 

His lips pressed against yours and his tongue quickly made its way into your mouth, the movements from his touch making you dizzy and tingly all over. Want was already pooling in your lower stomach. Arousal seeped through your folds, you hadn’t felt Cheol’s touch or mouth on you in so long. It kickstarted your system and had you wet after just a couple of minutes of making out. 

“More please,” you mumbled against his lips. 

Cheol’s hand moved down from your waist, below the gray pants you were wearing today. His large fingers quickly found their way through your folds, your pussy now soaked and leaking as he slipped his hand against your clit. His breath was hot against your face as he let go of your lips so he could hear your whimpers as he circled your clit. 

It felt so good, his rough hands knew exactly what to do as they dipped into your cunt, only teasing you before he went back to press on your sensitive spot. 

You were spreading your legs further apart the longer he teased your clit, you wanted to be filled, you wanted him to push his digits further into your body, you wanted to feel him inside of you as you gushed around his fingers. When he did you moaned out his name, the tension from the past few weeks all dissolving as he fucked you on his fingers. 

A loud knock drew you both out of the moment, and an unsure voice came from behind the door. “Uhm, Cheol? I just wanted to tell you that you’re off for the rest of the day… I got both yours and y/ns shifts covered… so you could talk.”

Cheol cleared his throat, “Yeah, thanks Wooyoung!” he shouted back before pushing his fingers back deep inside your cunt. A moan escaped your lips as he hit the right spot within. 

Wooyoung went silent, “Okay fine! Later then!” 

Cheol didn’t bother to answer, and as Wooyoung left you could hear him talk to himself, “You do something nice for someone and all they do is wave you off so they can get their dick wet, assholes!” 

He would’ve done the same, but none of you would ever argue about it with him. You both laughed for just a second before Cheol kissed you gently yet again, making you forget everything about what had just happened. 

You soon came as he thrust his fingers deeper into you while the palm of his hand pressed on your entire pussy. It was heavenly, a white blur was all you could see, and relief swept through your body. Cheol kept you from falling onto the floor when he put down the leg he had helped hold up. You were holding onto his clothing with a firm grip as you came down from the first high you had felt in too long. Cheol was riding on a high of his own, not because he had been allowed to cum but because you had. He felt just as proud now as he did the first time he had managed to make you have an orgasm, and he let the words come as they wished, “I love you, more than anything in the universe.”

Your eyes fluttered open upon hearing those softly spoken words. The words that turned your world upside down, the words that terrified you, the words you had longed to hear. 

“I love you too,” you said, pressing your forehead against Cheols. 

“I know,” he chuckled.

“Wait what?” You said and pulled away your head to try and see his face, “How… oh!” 

Your hand flew to slap over your mouth as you remembered what you had been thinking last night, remembering how the words had sat right at the tip of your tongue before you let yourself fall asleep last night. “I said it out loud, didn’t I?”

Cheol nodded, a smirk playing on his lips. “I hope you meant it because you’re gonna have to spend the rest of eternity with me once we get to our paradise.” 

“Our paradise? You already think Lumen is ours?” You teased. 

“Of course, with my handsome face and your gorgeous everything, how could we not find ourselves in charge?” 

“You’re insane, and I meant it.”

His smile shone even in the darkness and it lit up your heart like the sky on New Year’s Eve. He held you that night just like all other nights, but your mind was calmer than most other ones. You were dragging your fingertips along Cheol’s chest, resting your chin on his pillowy arm. 

“You know what’s funny?” he suddenly asked. 

You looked at him curiously. “What?” 

“My entire life, the people around me tried to convince me that I didn’t have a will of my own - that I didn’t have my own needs that they couldn’t fulfill.”

“...that’s funny?” you asked, shocked at his apparent sense of humor.

Cheol laughed, “No, no, I mean, it’s not really funny… but it’s funny how, as I had begun believing this myself after years of having been told this, it all just collapsed in front of me the moment I picked up the phone and heard this stranger with the most endearing voice ever try to order a pizza from me.”

You stayed quiet, “...again, that’s what you find funny?? I think we need to work on your humor mister.” He laughed more, your giggles joining his after a moment. Living wasn’t easy, but at least he had joined yours, and it was beginning to transform. Nothing was as it had been, and even an unsure future on the run seemed better than the life you had been living so far. At least you had one another now. 

Time moved too fast after that day, the goal of somehow going to Lumen with Cheol made the days on the ship with San and Wooyoung fly past you. Soon you were preparing to land on Specus. San had told you that you could stick with him for a few days before he got back on the ship to make the journey back to Earth. You both accepted, grateful that you didn’t have to figure out where to go by yourselves on this new planet. 

The day you stepped off the ship onto the giant spaceport on Specus you held onto Cheol’s hand, just as you had when you boarded it. Specus was an industrial planet, its main purpose was to mine minerals and metals from deep within the planet. It was visible the second you stepped off the ship that this planet wasn’t like Earth at all. Everything felt like it was a back alley, with pipes, and rust covering every building and vehicle you could see as you followed San through the rundown welcoming hall. There were no shops filled with books or souvenirs, only a ticket shop booth where a robotic arm was visible in the yellowish window. San led you through the hall, not looking at much and saying even less. It was colder here than on Earth. 

“Stop.” San said suddenly, “Look up.” 

Both you and Cheol let your eyes flash up, towards the ceiling, or at least towards what would’ve been the ceiling had there been one. Instead what you both saw was a dark violet sky, not the kind that you had both seen on Earth, but one that looked like it was exploding with tiny stars. “What is that?” You asked as you stood with your neck bent back completely so you could watch the stars moving around above you, faster than any stars you had ever seen before. 

“Specus spins faster.” San explained, “Somehow that ended up meaning it’s always this one color of blue in the sky and the light from the stars in our galaxies all blend to create this kaleidoscope of color and stars.”

“It’s pretty,” you said, tears almost forming in your eyes at your first sight of something other than metal and the darkness of space you had seen in months. You had missed looking up at the sky, you realized, even if it wasn’t the same sky that you had at home. 

Home, where was that? Earth wasn’t your home anymore. Did you not have one anymore? 

Cheol’s hand squeezed around yours and you abandoned the thoughts. They would only hurt you in the end, it was better to focus on the now.

San got you all two rooms at a hostel, the only one on the entire planet it turned out. They didn’t get many visitors except for the few who worked on commuting ships like San, and now you two. It had been so long since you had slept in a real bed that you slept as long as you physically could bear before your stomach was growling at you to get breakfast. San had already retrieved some while Cheol stayed with you, refusing to leave you alone just yet. He didn’t trust the others in the hostel, it seemed, as he continued to be on guard as you both got ready to leave your hostel room. 

That day San took you both on a tour around the town, it was small but busy. Automatons, aliens, and a few humans were wandering around; on their way to work, on their way to their temporary homes, or on their errands for the day. In that sense, it didn’t feel like you were very far away from Earth. But as you glanced up at the violet kaleidoscope sky you were reminded of just how different it all was.  

As the days passed on Specus, you didn’t have a clue of what to do next or how to get to Lumen. San had done everything he could for the both of you, even teaching you some of the most basic routines for checking on Cheol’s health. It hadn’t been an issue you had spent a single thought on, his health being something you took for granted even now. San helped you realize that what you had gotten yourselves into was dangerous not just because of who was after you, but because of who you two were. You needed to know things in case Cheol couldn’t help with telling you what he needed, in case something bad happened. Nobody would be able to help once you were alone. You weren’t handling the realization well. 

Cheol was the one to let you forget about it after you had gotten yourself stressed about what could end up hurting him. He felt guilty about having you worrying about him, and honestly, a little pissed at San for frightening you so much. He knew you needed to learn though, and opted for being your comfort instead. 

He kissed you, gently and lovingly, and he held you close when you couldn’t let the thought of having to use the new skill San had taught you on the man you loved. Seeing the inside of someone in that way had become your new nightmare. Cheol held you each night, shushing you back to sleep if you ever woke up from it. 

Two weeks ended up passing by just like that, nightmares and lessons on Automaton autonomy. You wanted to get off of Specus by the beginning of the third week. It didn’t matter that San and Wooyoung had become your friends, you wanted to leave. The sky was still beautiful but everything around you reminded you of what San had taught you, and you couldn’t think anymore, you didn’t want to think anymore. 

“Let’s find a ship then,” Cheol simply said when you voiced how badly you wished to go somewhere else, to find your paradise sooner rather than later. 

You laughed a bit at that, “Do you really think it’ll be that easy?” 

“Of course, it’ll be easy!” He said with a casual shrug. You flashed him a smile in return for his suddenly carefree attitude. 

“I don’t believe you, but I say we give it a shot!” 

Before you left you said your goodbyes to San, just in case you ended up actually lucking out and finding a ship that was willing to take you both to Lumen. You hugged the mechanic who had helped you both so much during these months. Cheol did the same, with one small difference, he whispered something to San before he pulled away. Something that made San’s face go serious but he nodded in confirmation. What had he agreed on? What had Cheol told him? You tried asking him as you left towards the spaceport but he wouldn’t budge, telling you “You’ll notice if it worked later, I promise.”

The hours passed, and any ship that looked decent had declined you. Every captain had a destination already and none of them had Lumen on the maps. 

You were tired and hungry. Cheol’s chipper attitude was long gone by now and you were both seemingly thinking about giving up for the day. 

“You know what, what if we just steal that ship? If we’re gonna be on one for months or even years we should have a proper one,” you joked and pointed at a large ship by the end of the docks. Cheol looked at the ship, it was larger than the ones you had been asking all day, but not even close to as large as a cargo ship. It was the perfect size for going on a long trip with a few people. 

“Alright,” Cheol said without a hint of sarcasm, which made you look at him surprised. 

“Wait what? You want to steal that ship for real?” You wheezed out. He nodded, a playful smile showing you that he meant to try. 

Fuck it, your mind decided - hunger and the need to leave Specus and all its minerals overtaking your rational mind. You boarded the ship, walking past any guards as if you owned the place. Nobody minded you two, the few people that far out the docks minding their own business. The ship was even more gorgeous inside, modern and so clean you were shocked at how long you had gone since you last saw a floor without mud or rust. 

You walked into the cockpit of the ship. If someone were to arrest you right now you were happy to at least have seen this ship before rotting away in Phylaca forever. The prison planet was the one place you never wanted to see even if you weren’t going there for imprisonment. But going to Lumen was all that mattered, so you would need to steal this ship. 

“I think this will do,” you said and smirked at Cheol. 

“What are you two doing here?” The voice made you both jump, and you both looked towards the exit. A man, rather large in his stature, stood confused and agitated in the doorway. He had just stepped inside the ship, the door behind him still wide open with the ramp that led to the dock right below him. You were in shock one minute and the next you began running. But you weren’t running away from the large man, you ran right towards him. A look of panic flashed across the man’s face and then your body slammed into his. You were sure you were going to fall with him, but you never did. A strong grip holding onto your waist. When you opened your eyes to see if you were dead you saw the man on the ground. He wasn’t moving. People around him looked up from their own business to look at what had happened. Cheol pulled you inside, closing the door as you stared out into the void in front of you. 

Had you killed that man? You ripped yourself from Cheol’s grip and looked out of the tiny window that faced the docks where more and more people were grouping around the man. Was he moving? You wanted to think he was moving. The people around him tried to lift his head, he was bleeding a little, but he was sitting, right? Your mind was a mess. You didn’t know if what you were seeing was real, or if it was your mind playing a terrible trick on you.

You gasped as you saw the docks moving. They were moving away from you just as the man seemed to turn and point at you. “He’s not dead! Cheol I’m not a murderer!!” You shouted.

But Cheol wasn’t there, he wasn’t where you had torn away from his grip anymore. He was by the cockpit, hands frantically trying everything he could to get the ship to do as he wished. The docks hadn’t moved, you realized, the ship had. 

Cheol picked up how to steer the ship rather quickly, even understanding how to use the auto control so he could charge at the same time you slept instead of constantly doing shifts. You were happy about that since it meant you got to spend time together on the ship, your days becoming rather pleasant as you settled into a routine. There was plenty of fuel on the ship, both for the ship itself and for you and Cheol. Electricity was easy to come by and there was a rather large supply of food there as well. You had managed to snatch a ship that had just been restocked - it was hard to accept the amount of luck the two of you had been struck by. 

But the best part of the ship was the fact that nobody else was on it. For the first time in forever, you two were alone. Alone with a bed and each other. There was nothing else to do but to let Cheol fuck you in every way he, or you, wanted. And my god you wanted to - all the time. The day had only just begun on your second week on board the ship and you hadn't had the chance to get dressed yet, breakfast in bed having become the norm as you let the ship steer away from everything, hoping it would lead you to Lumen if you just kept the course San had told you about. You simply steered away from — and hoped for the best. After all, you had better things to do that occupied your mind at the moment. 

Cheol could taste the fruit you had just eaten for breakfast, you tasted like what he imagined summer would if he could consume it. In a way he was. He was drinking in the way you looked underneath him with his eyes, he was licking and kissing every inch of you that he saw, nibbling on your skin, making you moan and beg more and more for each day that he learned his way around your body. 

Never before had you been undisturbed like this for days on end. It was pure bliss. He found out each spot you liked to feel his lips on your skin, each spot where he could make you arch your back off the bed, and each spot on the ship where he could drill into your cunt until your legs gave out and your juices leaked out of you. You made a mess of the large bed that had been meant for someone a lot more powerful than the two of you, but none other than you two would’ve been able to use it to its fullest like you had been while alone on the ship. 

Cheol’s fingers smoothed over your thighs as his hot breath caused shivers to spread from your core, goosebumps prickling your skin in the air of the spaceship. You were grabbing fistfuls of his long hair, his gaze sultry and dripping with lust as his tongue flicked over your clit. He was burying his face in your puffy and glistening folds, reveling in your moans and how your entire body was writhing from his tongue exploring your wet pussy. 

You had been at it for a while, but neither of you were finished, orgasms were still left to be had before you would be able to sleep. 

The way he was making out with your cunt would soon send you over the edge if only the muffled sound of a voice hadn’t found its way through the corridors of the ship to pull you out of your pleasure. 

“What the fuck is that?” You groaned, pushing on Cheol’s head a little as if you would be able to hear the voice clearer the further Cheol was from your cunt. This was true, but not enough of a reason to give up on chasing your orgasm, according to Cheol since he simply attached his lips to you again. 

He hummed, meaning to get you to ignore whatever it was. The voice of a person, clearly in a rush, continued to echo in the large rooms from the cockpit. “Cheol I need to check on that. They sound worried, maybe they’re in danger.” 

“Fucking hell!” He groaned out as you pushed on him again. “How is it possible for us to get interrupted right now?! We’re in the middle of the freaking space for goodness sake!” Cheol shouted, his lips leaving your body and his hands stilled. 

“I’ll fix it. Gimme two seconds,” you said with a giggle. He had taken the words right out of your mouth, it was incredible how you could never have sex without someone interrupting you. 

You rushed to the cockpit, only managing to throw on a simple T-shirt. “Hello?” The voice came screeching out of the sound system in the cockpit. You had never used it before, but with a simple push of a button that blinked in a bright shade of red, you were able to answer the person on the other end. “Hello! Can we help you?” You asked in your friendliest tone. 

“Yes, hello, this is the spacecraft Marquise, 4210-CH378,” the voice stated, “We are on course for —- and have discovered your ship on our monitor. We are on a direct collision course with your ship if nothing is adjusted, and based on our estimation of your ship size we are afraid that any living beings on your ship will be crushed as a result of the impending collision.” 

You were speechless, “I’m sorry? We’re about to crash into you?! And die?!” You shouted the friendly tone you had tried to access now long gone in favor of your pure panicked state. 

“I’ll move our ship! Please don’t crush us!” You shouted as you pressed down on the button, hoping to the stars that your actions were the right ones to do at that moment as you simply smashed buttons at random on the control desk. Anything to make the ship away from the larger ship that was already visible in the far-off distance, a star that seemed to move twice as fast as any regular star could. 

You hadn’t noticed Cheol when he entered the cockpit, only noticing him when you felt a kiss on your shoulder, which then became a row of small warm kisses down your back. A small chuckle came from behind you as your body reacted to him, forgetting what you were doing. 

“If you intend to change the course of your ship, we would prefer it happen before you end up in front of us…” the person on the other side of the intercom reminded you. 

You had forgotten, pushing the red button once again, bending forward as you did, giving Cheol the perfect opportunity to push his face back against your still dripping pussy. 

“I’m so sOrry-” you winced, “I’m having some technical difficulti- ah!” 

“Do you need some assistance?” a voice crackled over the intercom. You needed to get the ship on another course or you would soon be nothing but a bug on the windshield of the much larger ship coming right towards you. Cheol’s tongue on your soaking cunt had you trembling where you stood, bent over the control panel, the ship in sight and your mind working against the impulse to give in to Cheol’s magic touch and ignore all your issues. 

You tried to momentarily pull away from his face, but he had you in his grip and you were too entranced by his grip to properly make the effort to get your heat away from his warm tongue. Instead, you pushed on the lever that you had seen Cheol use only once or twice, unsure of what it did but it was the best option. You pushed it as far as it went, and the ship began turning away from your intended course, and by extension, away from the collision course. 

“Thank you. We wish you good luck on your further travels,” the voice from the larger ship sounded through the intercom once again. “No problem, you too!” you managed to say before turning away from the control panel, Cheol’s grip on you only losing for a second as he took his mouth off of you, only to sit you down in the pilot’s seat. This time you weren’t focused on staying on the course however, instead the chair was turned away from the panels and the vast universes outside the ship, instead, you had a very cocky Seungcheol on his knees in front of you. Your cunt was on display and dripping as you awaited his touch yet again. 

“You seemed to be a little distracted just now,” he chuckled. You scowled, but not for long, your neediness taking control of you once again as you pushed Cheol’s face back to your arousal, which he lapped up with fervor, the stress of the moment gone just as it had come, the incident being largely forgotten by the both of you afterward. 

This was one of the biggest mistakes you could have made on your journey. Forgetting where you were going, forgetting that your newly found safe haven on the ship would only last as long as nothing burst your fragile bubble. 

Days passed, and your waking hours flew past you almost as fast as the space around you did. 

A single blip showed up at the edge of one of the monitors in the cockpit. Blinking bright blue, your spacecraft flew closer with each day. Neither of you paid any attention to it. The both of you relied on the autopilot mode to guide you to Lumen, even if your initial direction was based on nothing more than what San had told you months ago. 

The change of course hadn’t made a difference to your daily routine until you saw the desolate planet in front of you. When you had spotted it one morning in the distance, you had presumed it to be an optical illusion. There wasn’t supposed to be much of anything out here, but you could very clearly see a small planet, darker than the surrounding space, with only the lights of ships to reveal that it was anything other than space junk or a meteor. 

Dark and wet, it lay lonely in the universe. Your fuel had begun emptying after weeks of nonstop flying, you would need to stop at one place or another sometime soon. Changing courses away from the prison planet now would only make suspicion arise from the watchtowers on the planet. There was no denying it: Phylaca would be your next stop.

“We need to put on our best act, we fucked up y/n, let’s make it quick…” Cheol tumbled as you both watched the planet becoming bigger and bigger from the cockpit’s large window. “As long as they don’t find out anything about who we are or why we’re here, everything will be fine,” you agreed, the doubt evident in your voice and the way you were biting your cheek to distract you from the sense of doom you were experiencing. 

Docking at Phylaca’s spaceport was unexpectedly easy, the man who had answered the intercom had welcomed you to land on one of the less crowded docks before they could come to meet you. You had worried they would take you as pirates or something worse since you weren’t authorized to be there, but the man on the speaker had jokingly called you out on “not exactly looking like a pirate ship.” You weren’t sure how you should take that, but you were thankful that it had let you both safely land on the planet. 

A guard was coming closer, he didn’t look like most guards you had seen before, he was rather short and his stature was on the smaller side. His presence, however, was enormous. The way he carried himself made you a bit nervous as he approached. You went out to meet him, hoping it wasn’t all a ploy to get you and Cheol arrested, he stayed behind inside the ship, having been convinced that it would be safer if nobody had seen him on Phylaca at all. San had recognized him as a level 1 automaton, even though most people can’t tell the difference at all, who was to say that nobody else would? 

“Hey,” the man said and reached out a hand, “Welcome to Phylaca, the intergalactic prison.” 

You had to swallow hard to not reveal how nervous that made you. “Hey, me and my crew were hoping that we could stay here for just a little while, just until we can restock on some supplies and fuel. We’ll be out of your hair before you can even count to 10!” You rambled, not much thought going into what you were saying even though your brain was running in circles trying not to say anything stupid. 

His features were sharp, delicate in some way, he stared at you expressionless as he listened. 

“That soon? On the run or something?” He said, the same expressionless eyes staring at you suspiciously. 

Fuck, you had already fucked it all up. You would die in prison and they would probably send Cheol back to earth and he would forget everything and you would be left here all alone for all of eternity! You wanted to cry. The guard must’ve noticed, because as he saw the tears trying their hardest not to fall from your bottom lashes his expression let up, eyebrows knitting worriedly together and he reached out a hand, “No, shit, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you cry!” 

The tears fell, and you wiped them off, pulling back from the hand the guard had reached out for you. “I was only kidding, okay? I’m gonna tell you a secret, yeah?” 

Your tears were gone, you mind a huge question mark as the guard you had been speaking to for about two minutes had 1. Made you cry, 2. Guess your life’s story in two seconds, and 3. Wants to tell you a secret so you won’t cry?? 

Who was this man? 

“You’re not the first person who has ended up here while on the run, and I’ll help if you are! That’s my secret…” he whispered, looking at you with a curious eye. Was he waiting for you to respond to him disclosing what was most likely highly restricted information to you just because you were tired and scared?

“Uhm…” you were speechless, “I’m y/n, I’d love help…” 

“Oh wow, okay that was much easier than it usually is. Hi y/n, I’m Hongjoong,” he gave you a gentle smile now, somehow reassuring you that you would be okay, even if you had just been offered illegal help from what you figured was basically a corrupt guard. 

“What? He just agreed to help us? A Phylaca guard agreed to restock our storage and fuel tank. Just like that?” Cheol was in disbelief, you nodded with big eyes, barely believing it yourself. 

“I mean, it’s possible that he only said he would because I was crying and he wanted some time to get more guards to come and arrest us… but he seemed very nice!” 

He was in shock, and he was scared, you could see it in his face before he hid it in his hands, rubbing away the worries as much as possible. 

“He… did he not want anything in return?” He finally asked. You were silent for a moment. “Y/n. What did he ask you to do in return for this huge favor?” 

His voice was stern, and you would need to tell him eventually anyhow. 

“…he wants us to help one of his acquaintances get off of Phylaca…” you mumbled, a bit scared of how he would react to you agreeing to host strangers on your ship. 

“You invited refugees from a prison to our ship?” 

“…I did.”

He stared at you, his expression hard to read. 

“Can we run before they get here?” 

“I don’t think we should…”

“…Fine, let’s wait for them, whoever they are. But if it turns out they’re literal murderers or something, we should kick them off sooner rather than later,” he said before standing up. You were standing by the door, not having gotten much further into the room created for the kitchen staff on the ship, the room that you had deemed safe enough for Cheol to stay in while you went outside to meet Hongjoong. 

He walked to you, taking your face in his hands, “Thank you for coming back safely, even if this deal might get us killed in the end.” 

You chuckled but was interrupted when Cheol leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to your lips. 

The ship was ready to lift, but the docks were even emptier than you had seen them during the entire time you had been on Phylaca. Hongjoong hadn’t talked to you much since that first day. He had sent notes along with the supplies he had sent over. It was terrifying each time a delivery was made, you never knew if this was the day you would be found out and arrested. But Hongjoong had turned out to be trustworthy, and you had kept your own promise of staying to help out his acquaintances in need too, at least so far. 

“They haven’t shown yet?” Cheol asked when he came back to the cockpit where you sat, prepared to lift the moment your new passengers were on the ship. 

“Nope, Hongjoong said that they would show up about now… should we leave if they don’t come?” 

“I don’t know. Maybe they will come after us if we leave…we don’t know how much we should trust that guard if we break our deal.” 

He was right, you needed to wait; you needed to keep your promise to make it off Phylaca safely. If you had done all this just to get arrested while leaving the planet, it would’ve all been in vain. 

You waited, the silence of the empty-looking planet feeling increasingly eerie. 

Then you spotted them, you gasped, they were running. Two people were running towards you. You couldn’t see them clearly, they were too far away at first. You recognized the jacket on one of them, it belonged to the guard on Phylaca. The other person was seemingly wearing matching clothes. Were they criminals? What had you gotten yourselves into? 

You didn’t call for Cheol to come look, but he noticed the way you tensed up as you saw them coming closer and the way your breath hitched in your throat when you finally saw them. You recognized one of them from the big plasma screens. His face had been everywhere. Even though you hadn’t been looking much at any of the members standing beside the man you had found out was the idol you were talking to in secret, you could recall his face lit up with the cold blue lights in the evening. He was one of the 53V3NT33N members. D1N0. One of the members Cheol had been forced to leave behind when he ran. He was here, on Phylaca. 

Cheol stood frozen beside you. They stopped just a couple hundred feet away, the other person blocking the view of D1N0’s face. Something was happening, you didn’t know what, but when you saw the guards you didn’t even care anymore. You weren’t going to get caught here, not like this. D1N0 had stayed behind. He pushed the other person forward, and simply watched as they ran toward the ship. They ran away from him, away from the guards, and towards you and Cheol. 

They were the acquaintances Hongjoong had spoken of, they were supposed to leave with you. Both of them. But only one of them got on board. Cheol was still frozen, you weren’t sure if he was even there anymore. You couldn’t wait. The stranger that had run on board was safe. 

You left the docks, hearing a faint, “No!” You knew it was Cheol, but the instinct to get you all to safety was greater than his shouts for you to turn back. He could’ve overpowered you and made you go back, but he didn’t even think that far. He ran to the doors that would’ve led him outside. A large bang echoed through the metal hallways of the spacecraft along with a pained sob. You didn’t know if it came from Cheol or your new passenger.

But there was nothing to step onto, only space. The view of D1N0 was soon lost, you didn’t want any of you to see what would happen to him as he stayed on Phylaca. 

You didn’t want to know what you had done as you left without him. 

Cheol was quiet. So quiet. 

He said nothing, he barely looked at you. It felt like a stab in the back each time he looked away from you when you even looked his way or opened your mouth. 

The bang had come from Cheol making a dent in the interior of the ship, wrecking his hand in the meantime. You had looked at his broken hand in horror, the sight of his skin cracked but without a single drop of blood or bone showing made you queasy. 

The stillness of the ship continued for days. Your new passenger having shut themselves away from the both of you, it was different than Cheol, but the silence was crushing anyhow. There was nowhere to go, you were stuck right there, in the middle of the universe. 

You used everything San had taught you back at Specus to help heal Cheol’s hand. With bandages and thread, you sewed and patched his cracked skin over the mechanical workings of his broken self. It didn’t help him deal with his real pain though, you knew that. 

You couldn’t understand either of their pain completely, but you tried. He didn’t want you to try. He was hurt and he wanted you to feel as alone as he did, you knew he just didn’t want to be completely alone in his pain. So you let him stay as he was: quiet and angry. 

He didn’t touch you anymore. He didn’t talk to you. He didn’t even care to respond to a single question you asked for over a week. You cried yourself to sleep each night, and did your best to create a new daily routine now that everything had changed into this still place of pain and dark glances thrown your way. 

You had begun blaming yourself, you had made the choice, maybe you did deserve to be shut out by everyone. 

You waited for days for him to take the first step, to tell you that he was ready to talk about it all, to tell you that he wasn’t mad about the choice you had made. He never did. He didn’t say a word. The solitude continues for all three of you on your lonely spacecraft on your way to a planet that didn’t exist…

It continued until you felt yourself going mad, the days had melted together in a bad way, the only emotion you had felt was gray and sticky and you hated it. You had begun hating yourself because of it. 

“Cheol.” Was all you said to him, startling him where he sat staring into space from the cockpit. You stood a couple steps away from him, closer to the door than to the man who seemed like a shell of who he had been before Phylaca. 

At first, he only responded with silence, but after a moment words formed. “Do you know why I had the phone you called in the first place?”

His voice sounded raspy and repressed as if he was choking on the syllables. You shook your head in response. He didn’t see you, but he continued. 

“I convinced the management that I needed a phone that wasn’t connected to the network so that in case anything bad happened to me or the members, I would be able to contact help even when our communication devices didn’t work.” 

His voice wasn’t more than a choked whisper. The words still felt like a slap to the face. 

“Everything I have ever said, done, and felt has always been meant to help my members, they’re my family. Instead, I used what I had gained in the name of helping them, to ruin everything. I did it all for my own selfish desires. Can you understand how much shame and guilt is crushing me every day? Every minute I spend away from them. Not even knowing if they’re okay.”

You had nothing to say. What could you say? Could any of your words comfort him at all? Could you make him the slightest bit happier right now? Could you ever manage to keep him happy? Distracting him from all the disasters of the universe wasn’t possible, so what could you do? 

Instead, you continued to say nothing. Your body fell back against the cold metal wall behind you. You couldn’t say a single word to help him, but you could let him say all the words he needed to say to help himself. 

He stayed quiet for a while. Your shuffling as you slid down to the floor against the wall told him you were still there. His figure slumped back against the chair he sat in. 

“I just, I can’t believe I actually left them all to fucking deal with all of this by themselves. I don’t even know if they made it out alive.” He began, voice still strained as he tried to hide everything that wished to rip him apart from within. “I was supposed to be there for them, to be their leader who stood by them no matter what. And you know what, I took pride in that, I was so proud to be the one to support those guys even in the situation we were in.”

You stayed quiet. Quiet tears streamed down your face as you listened. 

“How could I just leave? What? Because I was scared of forgetting this? I could’ve stayed, I could’ve figured something out.” He was beginning to sound angry now.

“Cheol, no. You know you couldn’t have. This was the only way… wasn’t it?” You whispered, the tears clouding your eyes as you watched the back of his head. 

“I- I don’t know anymore y/n. Maybe I wasn’t thinking clearly at all, maybe I was actually sick like they said…” he sighed. 

Your heart was in your throat, swallowing hard you decided to say your peace as well. “So… because you loved someone- no, because you loved me, you’re gonna blame yourself for everything that has happened? That feels like you’re actually blaming me, you know?”

This made him turn around. His features were tired and his skin was dull. He hadn’t been taking care of himself at all. 

“Y/n, stop it. You know this isn’t your fault.” He mumbled. Tired eyes looking at your tear-stained face. 

“No, maybe it is. You would’ve never broken the rules, they would’ve never found out and you would’ve never been almost rebooted. And most importantly - if you had never loved me you wouldn’t have had to abandon your family.”

“Please, just stop that y/n.” He groaned and let his head fall back, eyes closed, he was in pain. You didn’t know if it was physical or mental. Nevertheless, you wanted him to listen as well. You were in pain too. 

“What? Am I making you feel bad for thinking it’s me that’s the problem and not the goddamn company that put you through it all from the start? Am I making you feel like you’re making me feel with all of your talk of how ashamed you feel that you left that life behind? Because I know, I remember how out of everything horrible in your life back then, those boys were the only thing that made you happy while you were there… So please, stop beating yourself up, Cheol. The past has already happened, we managed to get out right? What makes you think the others weren’t as lucky as we were?”

He stayed quiet for a while. His silence made your heart drop. You needed to ask him straight up. 

“Do you blame me? Do you hate me?” Your voice wasn’t more than a whisper, but he heard you. It was impossible for him not to. 

“I-” he tried, but his voice broke. The tears welled in your eyes. You wanted to fight for what you two had, but if he blamed you… whatever you had might be too far from saving. 

“It’s okay. I understand.” 

You forced yourself to say it, you couldn’t walk away from him. Even if he hated you, you refused to be the one to leave. 

“It’s not that I hate you, I just hate how it hurts. Because it really fucking hurts. I’m in pain every single second and I don’t know how to make it stop.” His voice was breaking as tears streamed down his face. “But, I… I can’t lose you too.”

You placed the back of your hand over your mouth, trying to somehow hold back the pain that wanted to consume you from the inside. 

“We should’ve tried saving Dino…” 

You got up from your corner, your arms finally letting your legs go, replacing your own arms around your body with Cheol’s. He hugged you. Tightly. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. It was relieving to say it. He had been in a shame spiral for the past few weeks. He just hadn’t noticed. Still, you stayed with him, waited for him, listened to him. He wanted to repay you for all of it. 

Weeks passed yet again. Things got better, slowly but surely. You talked to each other. You were beginning to forgive each other for those weeks after Phylaca. It wasn’t easy. 

Breakfast, lunch, dinner, sleep, and repeat. Small conversations, still trying not to start up another fight. It was exhausting. 

The stranger still wasn’t speaking much, too wrapped up in their own mind to be able to share the pain they kept inside. Not that either of you were sharing your struggles with them anyhow. It was a mutual understanding that all three of you needed some space, even as you were trapped together in space. Galaxies passed you by, and you found yourself passing time by watching the tiny lights fly past the large windows from the cockpit.  

Sometimes, Cheol sat with you. Holding your hand, comforting you without words just like he had been that day when this had all begun. That helped. It helped both of you; knowing that neither of you actually wanted to abandon what you had, even after everything. 

When something finally showed up in front of your ship, only a small planet, not much bigger than the moon of the earth, you didn’t allow yourself to get your hopes up. 

After so many months, this was probably only another uninhabited planet with a poisonous atmosphere. 

“I don’t wanna get your hopes up, Cheol, but this planet looks so much like earth…” you shouted to Cheol who was trying to get your guest to eat some of the lunch from earlier, with very little success. 

If this was Lumen, maybe everything would be okay.

Maybe the void of space you had been traveling through had an end after all, despite the overwhelming feeling of being trapped and that you would all end up wasting away inside the ship on your long journey. 

But if this was it…

You let the ship continue straight ahead. Cheol and your guest joined you in the cockpit after hearing your shouts across the deck. 

All three of you watched as the planet became bigger. You could see water, and green patches everywhere. Clouds! There were clouds and an atmosphere surrounding the small planet. 

You had gone off autopilot, Cheol helping you steer the ship toward the planet. You circled it, trying to draw attention to yourselves through the intercom system. No sign of life was heard until a small voice came through, a child. “Hello! Are you aliens??” The child asked over the crackling of the coms. 

You wanted to shout, there was life here! 

“Hello? We’re outside of your airspace, our registration is BO883628K, and we are requesting permission to land!” You shouted back. 

“What are you doing?!” Another voice could be heard, the small child squealed and the crackling disappeared. You were scared the last shot at landing somewhere had been lost forever, but the other voice came back after just a moment. 

“Hey? Who is this?” 

Your body was tense, nerves firing uncontrollably as you explained your errand yet again. 

“Of course, welcome to Lumen, wanderers.” 

You yelped, “Lumen?! We found it?” You were jumping up and down, laughing and shouting as you felt all your worries leaving your body. Your new home was right below you, welcoming you with a warm embrace and new hope.

“Yes, you found it,” the voice crackled, you could hear them chuckling a bit at your excited yelling. “There are bigger docks located northeast of your current location, go there to land safely.”

You found a house, outside one of the small towns near the docks. You had nothing to give in return for the hospitality the diverse population of Lumen offered you, Cheol, and your newest passenger. 

They didn’t care, they told you that most of the people there had already been through the same suffering that you all had. Anyone who made it to Lumen was treated like family, nobody was to be left empty-handed just because they were strangers to the people. 

“Is this really here? Am I dead or asleep or something?” You said in wonder, grasping at Seungcheol’s arm. You stood in your new kitchen, it was simple, but airy. The view from the kitchen showed the sunny forest lying just behind the garden and the porch. 

“If you’re dreaming I’m dreaming with you.” He laughed hysterically. “But I think it might be real…” 

You jumped into Cheol’s embrace, hugging and kissing him like the past few weeks had all been a bad dream, like this was your true reality and everything bad could be forgotten completely. 

He seemed happy as well, looking around the large house with you, coming up with ways you could improve the place, and how you could make the vegetable garden prosper once again. It was overgrown and run down, everything had been left to its own devices. But it was vacant, and the townspeople had agreed that you two would be wonderful as the new owners of the house. It was a short forest walk back to the town, where you had parted from your quiet passenger, telling them that they were welcome any day and that you would always have a spare room and a shoulder to cry on. It made Cheol happy, somehow trying to make up for the fact that you had lost D1N0 on Phylaca through this person that he must’ve cared about more than his own life. 

“Do you think they will be able to find their way here too? The members, I mean. Like we did?” You whispered, resting your head on Cheol’s shoulder, your hand in his. You watched the dark green leaves swaying in the summer breeze, the flowers following the sun that shone more than it was gone, and the grass on the ground scenting the air you breathed in. 

“I hope so, I think they will know eventually.”

“Know what?” You said and looked at him. 

“That we’re here.”

You tilted your head. “How would they know to find us here of all places?” 

“Remember the secret I had with San on the first ship?” He said and smiled, embarrassed about something. 

You nodded. Not quite understanding what he meant yet. 

“I told him to tell anyone he met that might be related to us. Actually, I told him to let anyone like us know that if we got here, we would offer a home for them to rest at.”

Tears welled in your eyes, he had been thinking of everyone else this entire time. Not once had he let himself be entirely selfish, you squeezed his hand, bringing it up to your lips and pressing a thankful kiss to his soft skin. 

“I think they will come, eventually.” 

The years passed on Lumen. You and Cheol had made a home for yourselves. A home that would be open for any runaways, robot, alien, and human alike. It was safe, happy, and hopeful because one day everything might be absolutely perfect in your new home. 

The spare rooms of your new house would exist for them if they could ever get to their leader. The thought helped him continue, to live life to the fullest until they could join him. It comforted you as well, knowing that he had some hope left and that maybe he could let go of some of the guilt you knew he carried with him each day, and instead let himself be proud of something once again. 

Reblogging and commenting is highly appreciated!! Hearing what you thought is what makes writing and being here overall so much fun! Ty and ily 💕

[navigation post!]

#svt sci-if collab #kwritersworldnet #sci-fi Seungcheol #Seungcheol smut #s.coups smut #Seungcheol angst #seventeen #kpop sci-fi #seventeen seungcheol #seventeen sci-fi #svt #choi seungcheol #svt smut #seventeen smut #seventeen angst

[wuahae]

✶ seventeen when you take your promise ring off during a fight

ft. hip hop unit

performance unit | vocal unit

seungcheol: his words spill over. seungcheol likes to pride himself on being rational, on having a firm hold on his temper even when everything around him is molten and up in flames. but one thing leads to another, words he doesn't mean slip out, a beat of silence passes, and then your finger is bare. (eyes wide, his heart take over his tongue in a panicked flurry. "fine, if you want to break up then let's break up.") he regrets it as soon as he says it, mouth gaping as his eyes go misty, but you interrupt before he can even get a chance to retract his words. ("do you want to break up?" you ask softly, the metal band rolling gently between your fingers. it doesn't take him even a second to refute. "no, I—" "ok." you walk over to him, drop the ring and gently close it into his palm. "ok.") you tell him you just need a little time to calm down, that you'll be back, but all seungcheol sees is the burnt ashes and barren soil of what was once a forest, former anger melting away into shame. he hasn't even apologized properly, how can you say you'll be back when you've left the ring behind and you've walked away from him and—his breath hitches. the warmth of the metal melds into his skin. (you'd left it so that you could come back for it, so that you would come back to him. and that despite the flames that once engulfed the land around him, there was a seed planted that could sprout once again.)

wonwoo: he tells you he loves you. the argument itself is a quiet affair, heated words masked in clipped tones and drifting glances. the second the ring leaves your finger, the air between the two of you chills, wonwoo looking at the abandoned ring, then to you, then back to the ring. there's a storm swirling within his eyes, tongue bitten in fear of saying something he would regret, so wonwoo says the only thing he knows for certain. ("i love you," and it sounds so simple when he says it you almost want to cry. love. like that was all that mattered.) it's gentle, the 'after.' wonwoo doesn't say much else, just that it's late, that you should rest, that you both can talk about this together tomorrow. you almost want to fight back with how easily wonwoo takes this, especially when you're still fighting the twist in your gut and the lightning ready to strike, but the thought dies on your lips before you can start. (wonwoo pulls you close before he leaves the room, tender fingertips holding your hand with a brief kiss to the top of your head. his thumb rubs the back of your hand before he lets go. "i love you," he says again. "good night.") the sun peeks through the clouds the next morning, soft words and apologies exchanged scent-drenched in petrichor, your ring safely placed back to where it always belonged.

mingyu: his mind goes blank. mingyu finds the ring on his desk the day after, tepid apologies still lingering in his mind from the night before. he thinks he's dreaming at first, blinking twice at it before reaching to touch his own finger. skin meets metal. it's not his. (you had left last night before you'd truly stopped being mad, mingyu could tell. clenched jaw, knitted brows, the fact that you didn't sleep over, and most importantly, the way you didn't say 'i love you' before you shut the door.) mingyu had thought you just needed time to cool down before coming back the next morning to soothe things over, but now it's a little past twelve and mingyu still has extra apology pancakes sitting on the counter and your ring is lying on the desk which means—(you're not coming back.) he feels the tears starting to well up in his eyes, a choked gasp sounding from his throat in a mangled sputter. you're gone and it's all his fault. (you find him half an hour later still standing at the desk, red-eyed and distraught. you call his name softly as you approach, his head snapping to your voice. "i forgot my ring here..." he sniffles. "...did you see it?") you let him cry into your chest afterwards, apologies soothing as you run your fingers through his hair, the ring slipped back on. it had just felt too empty without it.

vernon: he tries to conceal his shock. it's unexpected, when it happens. it's certainly not something that's happened before, but then again, you've never really had a fight like this before. to vernon it's explosive, it's sudden, but to you, this was inevitable. the ring pulled off your finger is the culmination of the little things you've been forced to tamp down and push aside because you wanted to be fine with it—because he was fine with it, because you felt like you needed to be fine with it. and amidst your distress, vernon isn't sure what he's supposed to do. (vernon doesn't know a lot of things—how to read the emotions hidden between your words, how to comfort your tears, how to keep you where you can still be in his arms. he supposes the only reason he's lasted this long while knowing nothing is because he's had you with him this entire time, but even that seems on the verge of collapsing.) vernon almost wants to feed into the panic, to ask if you mean it, to ask if this is the end, but the harsh sting of the action leaves him with a wound he puts off to nursing another time, one where he's not watching you stand at the edge of a cliff with the ground crumbling beneath your feet. so he extends to you the end of an olive branch instead, tells you he'll sleep on the couch for as long as you need and that when you're ready, he'll be there to listen to what you truthfully want to say. (you grab onto your end of the olive branch the day after the next, timid steps away from the edge. vernon welcomes you back with an open heart and a tight embrace.)

#seventeen reactions #seventeen headcanons #svt headcanons #svt reactions #seventeen scenarios #svt scenarios #svt x reader #seventeen x reader #seungcheol x reader #s.coups x reader #wonwoo x reader #mingyu x reader #vernon x reader #hansol x reader #seventeen imagines #seventeen angst #svt angst

[bambikisss]

Kiss me thru the phone: S.Coups

Pairing: Staff!Reader x Idol!SeungCheol

Summary: With how busy Seung Cheol is with the tour, it doesn't give him enough time to sneak off with his favorite stylist. So, he tries to make the best of it leading up to his one day off with you in Paris.

Warnings: unprotected sex (wrap it, people), Phone sex, descriptions of mutual masturbation, semi-public sex, biting, mentions of past recordings of sex, slight spit, use of nicknames (baby, princess, love),

Song recommendation: Kiss Me Thru the Phone by Soulja Boy, BTBT by B.I, Devita

Kiss me through the phone (kiss me through the phone) See you when I get home

A/N: According to the poll, S.Coups won, so he is next! Let me know in the comments which smut do you think I favored lol. Also yes, your best friend/Stylist partner is named Cherry, I thought it was cute lol.

Not Proofread

TAGLIST: @oceansletters @24p0t @smol-ggukie @appt2235

@christinewithluv @shuabby1994 @chanpvlento @marianamartinsthings @safsaf1980

Cherry: All stylists please report to standby

You sighed at the message before jogging to standby, watching as the other stylists got ready for the quick change that was about to happen. As much as you loved tours and the energy everyone had at concerts, it always heightened your anxiety.

"Here they come, everyone! 2 minutes!"

The boys quickly ran down the steps to their assigned stylists, breathing heavily as the last song was one with high energy. You quickly handed the passing boys water before handing one to Seungcheol, who was assigned to you and Cherry. He thanked you as you patted his face, working on fixing his makeup and hair while Cherry helped him change into his new set of clothes.

As you leaned closer to his face to fix his hair, he glanced over at you, shooting you a sly wink before stepping back to put on his new shoes. You had to look away so no one could see your smile, returning to face him with a focused face. Seungcheol often shot you secret winks whenever he could, wanting no one else to see them besides you as they were only for you, his girlfriend.

That's right, you were in a secret relationship with Seungcheol, A.K.A S.Coups of Seventeen.

You at first rejected the idea of dating the leader; your company wasn't fond of the idea of staff dating their idols and whenever it did happen, the staff were always harshly punished, as the company believed that they were "purposely distracting the idol from the duties." You found the whole thing bullshit- they couldn't control who fell in love.

But, after being around him for almost 3 years, you both began to fall and fall fast. You tried to change to a different member to avoid your feelings, but that only made him jealous and drove him to drive to your house in the middle of the night and confess to you. That was a year ago, and now you both were exchanging secret smiles and touches whenever you could.

"Please try to avoid getting wet, Cheol. I ran out of water proof foundation." You finished fixing his hair as he fixed the buttons on his black jacket, pausing when he tilted his head back to meet your eyes with a small smirk and a glint in his eyes. "But it'll give me more of a reason to sneak back here and see you." He left before you could respond, calling for his members to head to the lift. You couldn't help but roll your eyes before placing your items back into your holster, sitting back down on some boxes to try and enjoy the rest of the show.

"You know he's not going to listen to you, right?" You nodded at Cherry, crossing your arms as the next song started. He never listened to you, taking every opportunity he could within reason to see you. It sometimes both aggravated you and warmed your heart.

The rest of the show went off without a hitch, allowing you to now relax as the last song came on. You snuck off to your dressing room to start packing up your things, wanting nothing more than to head back to your hotel room early and sleep. "Running away?" You paused as Seungcheol snuck into your room, a smile on his face as he carefully locked the door. You raised your eyebrow as he carefully wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you close as he pressed a kiss to your forehead, humming about how much he missed you. You gently pressed your hands against his chest so you could look up at him, meeting his face with a small pout, which he kissed.

"Didn't I tell you to not get wet? I can tell you did," he chuckled as your hand gently cupped his face, leaning into your touch as he gently apologized. "Mingyu and WonWoo were actively trying to, despite my words."

"I'll make sure to give them a harsh scolding when I see them next, then." He nodded before leaning down to kiss you, obviously more concerned with kissing you than listening to how you planned on disciplining his members. If anything, he would take care of that for you, but, that wasn't important right now. He gently bit your bottom lip as he walked the two of you backward, stopping when your legs hit the counter, his hands then moving to place you onto the counter. He hummed against your lips as your hands moved underneath his shirt, smiling softly against his lips at the feelings of his warm chest and abs. No matter how many times you were intimate with him, you could never get over the feeling of him; whether in you or just like this.

"Cheol, no marks- remember where we are, baby," you sighed as his lips moved to your neck, pressing kisses to the open skin as his hands moved under your own shirt, moaning at the feeling of your skin. "I know, baby, I won't leave anything anywhere anyone else could see it." His tongue moved out to touch your neck, licking a stripe up to your jaw before biting it, leaving a faint mark. You closed your eyes as he tugged up your shirt, tossing it onto the floor as his fingers moved to unclip your bra as his lips met yours in a heated kiss.

"You look so pretty, baby, whimpering and whispering my name like a good girl." you nodded at his words, opening your eyes to meet him when he let out a soft chuckle. "I feel like you aren't paying attention to me, baby. I could say anything to you while you feel good and you'd just agree with me," he snickered, tossing your bra onto the floor as his face dipped down to leave marks along your chest, his lips leaving plush kisses against your skin. "No, I would n- fuck."

Your words were left into thin air as one of his thighs made contact with your covered pussy, giving you some sort of friction while his lips wrapped around your nipple, busying himself with your body while your hips moved to grind against the thigh. Your hands moved to grip your shoulders as you let out soft moans, licking your lips as he switched breasts, looking up at you with a small smirk at your ministrations. He couldn't help but moan when you dug your nails into his shoulder, trying to hold onto him tightly so you could earn more friction. If there's anything you do that drives him crazy, digging your nails into him is one of them.

He chuckled as your movements grew frantic, his voice now deep as he leaned over close to your ear, praising you as you felt your knot begin to tighten. His hands gripped your hips as you moved faster, his eyes now glued to your moving breasts. It felt like he was in complete heaven, wanting nothing more than to push you to the point of complete pleasure. "Come on, Y/N baby, give it to me, that's it." He pulled his lips from you as he watched your face contort into complete pleasure, watching as you began to shake along his thighs, a settle wet spot coming into view from the thin fabric of your shorts. Seungcheol cursed softly as you rested your head against the cold mirror, enjoying the buzz that was filling your head, only coming back to when he began to carefully dress you. When you looked down to notice the tent in his pants, you asked him about it, he only chuckled and shook his head, making you pout. "Do you hear everyone rushing around out there, Y/N? I don't think I'll be able to keep us both quiet while I-"

"Ok, Ok, I get it." You carefully got off the counter as he laughed, wrapping his arms back around you to press a kiss to your head, just like he did when he first came in the room. He definitely wanted nothing more than to have you coming over and over again on his cock, but with the mass number of staff running around and with how loud you both tend to get, he couldn't risk it- heck, he was risking it being in your dressing room this long. The last thing he wanted was rumors to start and for the company to come after you.

You must've had the same thoughts as him as you pulled back from his warm embrace, leaning up to press a kiss to his lips before gently telling him that he had to go. He sighed before nodding, a slight pout on his lips as he made his way to the door, turning back around to shoot you a quick wink and a kiss before slipping into the empty hallway, leaving you alone in your dressing room with the only reminder of him being your soaked underwear and shorts.

You made sure to check your appearance and make sure that you look sensible before joining everyone near the cars, your yearning for sleep once again returning.

~_______

"Yes, yes, I'll be awake in time for the meeting, don't worry Cherry. Sleep well, talk to you afterwards."

You rubbed your eyes as you placed your phone down onto the nightstand, sighing as your body relaxed into the cloud like mattress. The company would sometimes hold separate meetings for each individual member with their specific team if they had an event coming up, which was the case for you and Seungcheol tomorrow; and while you loved Cherry with all of your heart, you were still a bit upset that she was going to make you go into the meeting as the only sole stylist. While you had been in your position for a very long time, there was something about meeting with everyone, including Seungcheol that made you especially nervous. Now with the added secret of your relationship, you knew you'd be a bundle of nerves, so you needed to get lots of rest.

As you turned over to turn off your lamp, you noticed your phone buzzing, showing tomorrow's man of the hour calling you.

"Yes, Cheol?" You returned your head back to your pillow as you listened to the subtle sound of his sheets rustling, his voice soft as he asked you how you were doing. You couldn't help but raise an eyebrow as you glanced at the clock, noting how late it was, even for him.

"You care about how I'm doing at midnight?" your coy laced voice made him bite his lip, shuffling once more in his silk hotel bed sheets before he cleared his throat. He knew he was caught. "I just wanted to know how you were before I asked for a favor, that's all."

At your silence, he took it as a sign to let you know what said favor was. "I miss you, Y/N."

"I miss you too-" your words paused in your throat at the subtle moan that slipped through his lips, moving straight to your core, the familiar sound making you cross your legs. While your body reacted, your mind immediately put two and two together, asking him if he was serious. "I thought I could take care of it when I got back to my hotel room or it would just go away but," he hissed as his thumb moved along his now leaking tip, collecting his precum to use as lube as he continued to move his hand along his length. "I need you, Y/N. Can you come to my room, even just for a little bit?"

You bit your lip as you sat up, weighing your options as your listened to his moans, wishing you were there to actually hear them in person. Your body almost leaped out of bed to rush to his room, but your mind cleared up before you could. Your coworkers were spread out all over the hotel, so it would be a problem if they caught you sneaking out to head to a different room at this hour, especially Seungcheol's. "I can't, Cheol, it's too risky."

"Fuck, then talk to me like this, Babygirl. Talk to me while I fucking jerk off to the thought of your body." You rested your body once again back against the bed as one of your hands immediately moved to slip into your underwear, a soft mewl coming from you as you felt how wet you were. At your moan, he couldn't help but release his own, his hand picking up speed. "Tell me how wet it is, baby. Tell me how much that pretty pussy is soaking at the sound of me getting off right now."

"It's so wet for you, Cheol, fuck," you let your eyes roll back as you pushed a finger into you, clenching around the muscle as you began to pump your finger the same pace as him; imagining him standing over you shirtless, his fingers pumping into you, stretching you out before you got to have his cock. One of his rules was that he would always prep you for him, not wanting to hurt you with his size.

"Add another finger for me, Y/N. Keep imagining me being there, stretching that pretty pussy out, getting you ready to take my cock nice and deep." His voice had become much deeper as he approached his orgasm, tossing his head back as sweat began to build up as his hand sped up, moaning along with you as you whimpered his name. Seungcheol didn't care if his members heard him moaning next door, too focused on both of your approaching orgasm to care. His hand gripped his cock harder as your voice cracked, letting him know that you were about to cum, pumping himself faster to meet you. "Add just one more finger in there baby, curl it nice and good- I'm almost there, princess."

You did as instructed, your body arching as you came while you whimpered his name into the phone. He moved his hand faster at your whimpers before his own come coated his chest, his lips stifling his loud groan that wanted to escape due to the pleasure. He continued to pump himself until he was sure he was done, sighing before he thanked you, sitting up to grab his tissue to wipe off the mess. You did the same, cleaning yourself before returning to your bed.

"Are you going to the meeting tomorrow? It's apparently a big surprise," he asked, pouring himself a cup of water before sitting back down onto his bed. You nodded, explaining to him Cherry's situation. "Well, I don't mind being alone with you, of course. As long as I get to work with the prettiest stylist, then I'm alright." You could already imagine the smirk on his face, a small groan leaving your lips at his laugh. "Just remember that you'll have to keep all that flirty energy to yourself tomorrow."

He agreed as he took a sip of his water, noticing a text from his members complaining about hearing him jerk off. He chuckled before letting you know he had to go deal with his members, wishing you a goodnight before hanging up. You took a second to once again check the time before placing your phone back onto the stand, sighing as the cold sheets wrapped your body, slowly helping you fall asleep.

Tomorrow's meeting shouldn't be that bad.

~_____

"I need you to prepare about 50 outfits for a photoshoot in Paris by tonight. You fly out with Seungcheol tomorrow morning, so be prepared."

You couldn't help but freeze in your seat at the demand, your pen falling from your hand to hit your tablet. You had never heard of a single stylist being assigned such a large number of outfits with such little time before. You had to hold back your words as the manager continued on with the meeting, not even shooting you a second glance to make sure you were okay with the assignment. Your hand trembled from your growing annoyance as you picked up your pen, biting the inside of your cheek as a thick folder was slid over to you, labeling all of the concepts that were to be done throughout the photoshoot.

Before you could ask for clarification on one of the concepts, the manager cut you off as he asked certain team members to follow him for a different meeting, leaving you alone in the large meeting room he had rented with a flimsy folder and a bunch of random pictures. Your mind hadn't even registered the fact that you were traveling with Seungcheol, giving you a chance to finally be alone with him; your mind was more concerned with how you were going to piece together so many outfits with such little time. As you went through your day, you barely had enough time to check your phone, which Seungcheol understood. He did slip you half of his sandwich to scarf down while doing a fitting, but other than that, he hadn't seen you much. He tried to hide how worried he was about you, even becoming a bit snippy with his manager due to giving you such a large load of work, stressing you out. He also did ask WonWoo to try and convince Cherry to offer you some help, but she refused as he had her own assignment to worry about. It made him feel helpless; watching you rush around late into the night to prepare many clothes for him with no help.

Even at the airport, he watched as you lugged around the different suitcases, rushing over to help you when one of the paparazzi knocked one over. He shot you a gentle smile from underneath his mask before taking another suitcase from you, walking with you to baggage claim before boarding.

Once you did get to your seat, you sent him a thank you text, smiling as he sent you a selfie with the message "anything for you, baby. See you in Paris for a night you won't forget 😉"

You smiled at his text before falling asleep, knowing you needed to rest up before the rush that was to come.

The company had planned a large photoshoot around Paris as a specialty for Seungcheol's season's greetings package, which explain why you needed so many different clothes; there were cafe looks, regular boyfriend looks, etc. He looked good in anything you put him in, which you and the team were happy about. With every time you came over to fix his outfit, he would whisper something flirty or sweet, making sure no one was around when he did so. While other team members thought you were both were being friendly, you were retorting every flirty thing he would say. When you weren't fixing his outfit and gently hyping him up, you were enjoying the sights as you hadn't been to Paris. It made you smile, honestly- being in the city of love with the man you loved.

It almost felt perfect.

Once the shoot was over, you all went out for dinner, celebrating the successful shoot and looking over the pictures taken over food and drinks. After dinner, you went to the hotel you and the staff were all staying in, being the last one to check in.

"Ah, there is no room reserved for you, ma'am,' You raised an eyebrow at her words, asking the receptionist to check again before sighing when nothing came up. You could've sworn you made a reservation, but you guessed not. While you paced the lobby trying to figure out where you were going to sleep tonight, you also vented to Cherry.

Cherry 🍒: Okay, I got you a room :) Room 173-C, top floor, penthouse too! You can thank me later.

You sighed out of relief, taking your bags up to the elevator to the floor. You pressed your phone against the door to unlock it before walking in, pausing when you saw the room: it was decorated with roses and random gifts, a sweet scent filling your senses due to the many boxes of chocolate that was stacked along a gorgeous wine bottle. You thought you had entered the wrong room, about to turn around and leave when you saw Seungcheol come into view. His freshly done blonde hair was blown out and styled perfectly, his grey shirt tight against his body to show off his body while he also sported dark grey sweatpants. Even though he wore such a simple outfit, you could feel some heat rush through your body at the sight of him. He removed his hands from his sweatpants before he held out his arms, as if inviting you into his embrace. You took one more second to memorize how he looked before taking a few strides to meet him in a rough kiss, making him moan softly. The kiss was needy and loud as his hands moved around your body, obviously showing how much he missed you through his grabs and caresses.

"Hop baby," he gripped your thighs as you jumped into his arms, gripping at the tight shirt as he moved you both over to the bed, dropping your body down onto the bed as you bounced. His lips only moved from yours when you began to move up the large bed, kicking off you shoes as he sat at the edge of the bed, his eyes darkening. "You have no idea how much I missed this, baby, seeing you up on my bed, ready to take whatever I give you," he paused to reach behind him and take off his shirt, tossing it away to expose his body to you. It was obvious to you that he had been working out more often; his biceps were bigger and obviously stronger, making you wonder if he could really break you in half or throw you around.

He moved to his hands and knees before he began to carefully stalk up the bed, his eyes never leaving yours as he moved to hover over you. "Have I mentioned how much I love you, Y/N?" You couldn't help but giggle at his sudden love confession, rising your hips as he pulled down your bottoms and underwear. At your giggle his hands moved to pin open your legs, slowly using them as leverage he began to move into what looked like plank position before resting his stomach against the bed, giving you a great view of his back muscles while he moved your legs to wrap around his head.

"Do you remember the last time I had you like this, baby? Had a camera out recording the two of us, just like this- me about to taste this sweet pussy while you were-"

"Seungcheol please," your whines were enough for him give you a subtle lick, silencing your needy cry with a bit of pleasure, but not enough for you. "Am I talking too much, baby?" He asked, his hands moving to rub your thighs before placing a kiss onto them, a small smirk on his lips as you begged again, this time a bit louder, complaining softly about how much he was talking. "Maybe you should pull my hair baby, keep my mouth busy." You did so, gripping the blonde locks to pull him closer to you, moaning softly at the feeling. "Harder, baby." You couldn't help but gently shake at Seungcheol's commanding voice, pulling on his hair harder so he was fully pressed against your wet pussy, just like he wanted.

You couldn't help but grind against his face, moaning whenever his own moans provided vibrations against you. You squeezed your legs around his head, his blonde hair peeking out from your tightly closed thighs as he continued to eat you out, moaning praises into you while you did so.

After one louder moans of his name, he ripped himself away to press his lips against yours, successfully silencing you while his fingers moved to carefully take off your shirt. "As much as I love hearing you say my name so sweetly baby, most of the staff is below or on this floor and I would hate if they heard us and ruined our fun, right baby?" You nodded as the last fabric left your skin, returning your lips to his while he removed his bottoms. You bit his bottom lip as one of your hands moved around his cock, pumping it a few times as he gently moaned into your mouth before he moved you to lay down on your stomach, rubbing his cock along your wet folds, lubing himself up. He slowly pushed into you as your hands gripped the sheets, moaning into a nearby pillow while he filled you up, your body embracing every edge and ridge of his cock as he bottomed you out.

He gave you a few moments to calm down before rested his hands on either side of the pillow you were using, gently moving his hips side to side to ensure you were perfect for him. There was something about having you on your stomach, his hips flush against your ass, you ready for him to have as much of you as he wanted, especially in Pairs, somehow made him slightly sentimental. "Tell me you love me."

"What- Oh fuck," You gripped the sheets once more as his hips began to move harshly, snapping against the flesh of your ass as your face returned to the pillow, only for one of his hands to gently cup your face, making you look up at him while he continued to fuck you roughly. '' You heard me, baby. I know it feels so good, but I gave you a command: tell me you love me while I blow your back out so fucking well." You tried to form sentences while he moved, your brain going fuzzy as he moved faster, not giving you any opportunity to try and answer is question. That's how he wanted you, though: only focused on his dick and how good it feels, not anything else or anyone else.

"That's it, baby, fuck me back. Arch your back while I fuck you from behind," he leaned down to bite your shoulder while you did so chuckling when you began to whine about being close to coming. "You're close? Good. Cum for me, Y/N. Oh my god, give it to me" Seungcheol moved his hips faster as you came, biting his lip as some of your cum began to coat the outside of his thighs. He only slowed down as you began to shake, leaning forward to press a soft kiss to your skin before pulling back, the hand that was holding your jaw now moved carefully and slowly down your spine, smirking as goosebumps erupted in your skin. "You know what, baby? That was just. Not. Hard enough for me." his thrusts added emphasis to his words, his hand now roughly gripping at the flesh of your ass as he returns to his rough pace, leaning down to press his face against yours so you could kiss him messily, your hips now meeting his while a whole new wave of pleasure ripped through you, now coating both of your thighs.

He gently praised you as you continued to move back against him, his other hand moving from the pillow to move the hair from your face, moving to gently cup your jaw to force it open before he gently spat into your mouth, letting your head drop back to the pillow before he ran a hand through his hair, giving you a moment to calm down before he began to move his hips, gently pushing the upper half of your body down into the bed while he continued to move his hips, biting his own lip as he held back, contemplating something for a moment before he leaned down to press another kiss to your skin, his hips picking up the pace once you began to mewl into the sheets. "That's its Princess, louder. Get louder for me while you're so lost in these goddam sheets."

"But what about-"

"Obviously I haven't done a good enough job if you're still out here thinking about other people instead of me, right now. Guess I'll have to fix that." He flipped you over so you were on your back, your legs wrapped around his waist while he leaned down to kiss you, his free hand moving to cup your jaw once more so you were looking right at him while his hips picked back up their rough and fast pace, Seungcheol meeting your eyes as he felt himself begin to lose himself within the pleasure. "Cum for me, Angel, come on. I don't give a fuck who hears, come on baby. Cum nice and hard for me, yes." His words were rushed as you screamed his name, Seungcheol doing the same as his hips stuttered against yours, filling you up as you dug your nails into his biceps.

His eyes gently rolled back as he came, a mix of a growl and a moan leaving his lips as he fell forward to rest on your body, his head in your neck while you both held each other, relishing in the afterglow.

After a bit, Seungcheol moved off you, carefully moving to run you a bath before returning, placing you into the beautiful marble that was filled with roses, bubbles, and hot water. You rested your head against the side as he joined you, carefully washing your body before getting you dressed in one of his shirts, laying you down in the large bed while he cleaned up, letting you drift to sleep calmly.

You woke up the next morning to your boyfriend at one of the tables eating breakfast, scrolling through his phone with nothing but a pair of boxers on. When he noticed you were awake, he looked up, offering you a smile before taking him and his plate of food to the bed, sitting down next to you. While you munched on one of the slices of toast he had, he only took a simple sip of his coffee before simply saying "I have a meeting with my manager and higher management about our relationship."

You couldn't help but cough at his sudden confession, asking what he meant. To just randomly schedule a meeting with higher management was already crazy, but to have it about your relationship felt insane to you. Seungcheol took a moment to laugh before placing the food onto the nightstand, then turning to you with a confident smile; the same confident smile you fell in love with. "I honestly doubt that he didn't hear us last night, and from the look he gave me this morning when I was getting breakfast, he probably was already planning on telling them, so there's no reason to wait any longer." At your slight scared reaction, he leaned over to kiss you, easing any of your nerves. "I'll make sure nothing happens to you, I promise. Plus, wouldn't it be nice to no longer have to kiss through the phone?"

Yes, it would be.

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