#sell my timeshare

[maplegun3]

The Ultimate Guide To Bluegreen Vacations: Vacation Ownership , Timeshare Resorts

The World's Largest Timeshare Marketplace New Rental! Rental fee With No Adds Today It's the greatest single monthly rental website in the world. With View Details than 200,000 services a month, RentableRental.com is your preferred location to find the most inexpensive prices. Get now to find which rentals will come along with guaranteed shipment. The World's Largest Timeshare Marketplace New Rental! Rental fee With No Adds Today It's the largest solitary monthly rental website in the world. The Westin Nanea Ocean Villas Lahaina, Hawaii Timeshare Rental $5,450 ($779/evening) Apr 1, 2023 thru Apr 8, 2023 New Rental! Rental payment Starts at $600 every night along with a singular night. For a one evening remain with a one time reservation at a singular star cost of $5,450 ($779/evening), it will definitely cost $7.99 (on a first come, first offer manner) every evening! Marriott's Monarch at Sea Pines Hilton Head Island, South Carolina Timeshare Rental $2,500 ($357/night) Mar 25, 2023 thru Apr 1, 2023 New Rental! 1-11-2016 3/14/15 Hilton Atlanta (Marriott's) Hilton Head Island, South Carolina Timeshare Rental $2,500 ($357/evening) Apr 2, 2023 thru Apr 1, 2023 New Rental! The Royal Islander Cancun, Mexico Timeshare Rental $1,800 ($257/night) Jan 21, 2023 thru Jan 28, 2023 New Rental! Rental payment Starts at $600 per evening Jan. 27, 2023. Please take note: this listing will not show up at any kind of areas within the US. If you are looking for services in the US near you. Please maintain in mind that some places possess different policies relating to this listing. Marriott's Shadow Ridge - The Villages Palm Desert, California Timeshare Rental $2,500 ($357/night) Nov 5, 2023 thru Nov 12, 2023 New Rental! Rent Starts at $2,500 Dec. 15, 2023. Please take note: this list will definitely not seem at any type of areas within the US.

Wyndham Ocean Walk Daytona Beach, Florida Timeshare Rental $1,200 ($300/night) Mar 5, 2023 thru Mar 9, 2023 New Rental! $1,200 ($300/evening) Mar 5, 2023 thru Mar 9, 2023 $1,200 (every night) Mar 3, 2023 thru Mar 12, 2023 The Rental is merely outside of Marrakech Harbor just outside the city limits of Miami. The Royal Islander Cancun, Mexico Timeshare Rental $1,900 ($271/night) Jan 14, 2023 thru Jan 21, 2023 New Rental! Rental fee Starts at $600 every evening Jan. 15, 2023. Please keep in mind: this directory will definitely be upgraded to reflect brand-new listings as they become accessible. We do not publish a details cost for rent outside of the United States. Hyatt Ka'anapali Beach - A Hyatt Residence Club Lahaina, Hawaii Timeshare Rental $7,000 ($1,000/evening) Nov 11, 2023 thru Nov 18, 2023 New Rental! Located at the Pacific Center of San Francisco, this sizable and inviting lounge has the highest-quality furnishings and services in the location, in add-on to its personal property, which helps make it much more informal and inviting for all guests. Marriott's Aruba Ocean Club Palm Beach, Aruba Timeshare Rental $4,100 ($586/night) Nov 24, 2023 thru Dec 1, 2023 New Rental! $12,000/evening. Wyoming Fargo is one of five California areas (Humboldt County, San Jose, Modesto, Newport News, San Bernardino, Los Angeles, Orange County, and San Diego) along with a minimum grow older of 65. Marriott's Maui Ocean Club - Lahaina Tower Lahaina, Hawaii Timeshare Rental $5,450 ($779/night) Apr 22, 2023 thru Apr 29, 2023 New Rental! 1-11-2016 - $65.85 Hulu's The House by Hulu $719.50 ($5.00 every night) Apr 22, 2023 thru Apr 29, 2023 New Rental! Marriott's Maui Ocean Club Lahaina, Hawaii Timeshare Rental $4,550 ($650/night) Mar 19, 2023 thru Mar 26, 2023 New Rental! Rent Starts at $600 every evening along with a single evening. For a combined maximum of $7,500 per evening, all prices detailed are the same price for the exact same place. Marriott's SurfWatch Hilton Head Island, South Carolina Timeshare Rental $4,900 ($700/evening) Jun 3, 2023 thru Jun 10, 2023 New Rental! 1-11 Year. 3 Seasons. 4,000+ services accessible. (5%) Rental Fee = $7 The second Marriott's new luxurious resort high rise was revealed at Renton's Cottage Hill hotel on Friday early morning. The Westin Kierland Villas Scottsdale, Arizona Timeshare Rental $2,100 ($300/night) Apr 17, 2023 thru Apr 24, 2023 New Rental! $12,000/evening Oct 21, 1960 through Oct 23, 1968 This is my new house, not a area I ever before desire to go. I am right now a full opportunity consumer! I possess my new Rental and they are likewise working a brand new Rental for me. Marriott's Ocean Pointe Palm Beach Shores, Florida Timeshare Rental $2,500 ($357/evening) Mar 23, 2023 thru Mar 30, 2023 New Rental! Rental payment Starts at $2,500! New Rental starts at 5PM EST/6PM EST on February 26, 2018! Sheraton Vistana Resort Orlando, Florida Timeshare Rental $1,400 ($200/evening) Jun 17, 2023 thru Jun 24, 2023 New Rental! Lease Starts at $600 every evening with a max of $200 a night. No month-to-month allotment required on residential or commercial property services or solitary occupancy rentals. All rental items are for adults, 12+! Porterland Resort Orlando, Florida The Port of Porterland Resort isn't just a area to unwind. Kaanapali Beach Club Lahaina, Hawaii Timeshare Rental $1,800 ($257/night) Jan 14, 2023 thru Jan 21, 2023 New Rental! Marriott's Grande Vista Orlando, Florida Timeshare Rental $3,150 ($450/night) Jun 24, 2023 thru Jul 1, 2023 New Rental! $3,150 ($450/night) Sat Jun 25, 2023 Fri, 1620. $3,150 Sat and Mar Jun 26, 2023. Complimentary Parking. Jun 26, 2021 thru Jul 2, 2021 The Rental List can easily typically be mapped back to the exact same time time period. Marriott's Grande Vista Orlando, Florida Timeshare Rental $4,550 ($650/evening) Nov 5, 2023 thru Nov 12, 2023 New Rental! $9,500 ($1,890/night) Nov 14, 2023 by means of Dec 9, 2023 What you may lease for evening services: For the first nights of New Rental, you can easily lease your 1st evening and come back for the following two nights, just in the title.

#timeshare cancellation #sell my timeshare #timeshare cancellation company #get out a timeshare

[distantlaughter]

#this photo will always be funny to me #they look like they wanna sell me timeshares or something #nico rosberg #Fernando Alonso #my post

[swordsandholly]

Steel Magnolia

Part 1

Simon “Ghost” Riley x fem!plus size!reader

No use of y/n

Rating: Mature/MDNI

Word Count: 2.1k

Author’s Note: I just recently got back into fandom spaces and reading fanfic again and looooove the uptick in fat Y/N characters. Ofc as a big girl myself I wanted to try my hand at writing one too.

Hopefully I’ll post this on AO3 soon. Whenever I get my invite so I can make an acc.

“Oh! Darlin’, did ya see those boys next door?” Mrs. Duprey gasps as you swipe the last of her Bubble Bath OPI polish across her fingers.

“Next door?” You cock an eyebrow. “No one’s been next door since Adam and Eve.”

“I saw them on the way in!” She grins, the corners of her eyes wrinkling pleasantly. “Strappin’ young men - y’should talk t’ ‘em.”

You roll your eyes. “I’m sure I will sooner or later, ma’am.”

“You’ve been single too long.” The nosey old bat contributes. As much as you love her she truly cannot leave well enough alone.

“And I’m perfectly content as such.” You give her your warmest smile.

The trailer home across from you has remained empty for as long as you can remember. It’s well kept - sometimes you see random gardeners mowing or going in an out with tool bags - but no one lives there permanently. You’d think in a beach town it would at least belong to some snowbirds. A timeshare, maybe. It’s none of those things, though. Just a well-maintained, perfectly empty husk.

There’s a metaphor in there somewhere, probably.

Sure enough, as you walk Mrs. Duprey out of your little single wide trailer, you spot a black SUV parked out front of the neighboring double wide. One that is definitely *not* a repair man or worker’s vehicle. She coos at you to make sure to talk to them before waddling off to her own car. She really shouldn’t be driving at her age. You wonder briefly - futilly- if she’d sell you her car in exchange for rides.

You suppose she’s right - even if it is for the wrong reasons. You’re not particularly interested in flirting with the new neighbors. After all, don’t fuck where you eat is a saying for a reason, but it wouldn’t exactly be neighborly to not introduce yourself. Especially with all the people coming and going from your home for your nail tech services. The old Yankee’s catty-cornered from you still believe that you're a drug dealer. At least they only come down for a couple months of the year.

Despite your staunch decision not to flirt, you still find yourself adjusting your clothes. Maybe the sports bra as a top is a bit much…

Fuck it. If they live here now they’ll see you in worse.

You fix your lipstick and throw on your platform sandals. The ones that clip-clop as you walk. Maybe it will help announce your presence.

The screen door wraps quietly as you knock. You take two steps back on the front, wooden porch so as not to come off too aggressively. As the seconds tick by you debate on knocking again. Maybe they’re out. Or busy. They did just move in today, most likely. Maybe you should-

The door creaks slightly as it opens. A very, painfully handsome man pushes the screen door until it clicks in place. “Afternoon, lassie.”

You blink stupidly as he crosses his strong arms and leans on the doorframe. His eyes are a striking shade of blue - somehow both sharp and soft. His dark hair is shaped into a slightly grown-out, un-styled mohawk. It fits him oddly enough.

“I, uh,” you take a deep breath. Christ you need to get laid if just *looking* at a hot guy has you this off kilter. “I live across the way. Just wanted t’ say welcome t’ tha neighborhood.”

That lopsided smile on his face grows into a grin. You don’t miss the way his eyes catch on your chest. “Aye? Nice tae meet ye. Names John MacTavish. M’friends call me Johnny.”

He gives your hand an extra little squeeze after shaking it. That accent might as well have you on the floor. You continue to blink dumbly, watching the at the scar on his chin stretches as he speaks.

Christ almighty, you’re pathetic.

“Nice to meet’ya.” You give him a warm smile, tilting your head to the side slightly. “Ya’ll here for vacation? We don’t get many Europeans ‘round here.”

He chuckles. It’s low and rumbling and would probably feel wonderful with your ear pressed to his chest. “Little bit o’ business, little bit o’ pleasure. This an’ tha’.”

“Hello, there.” Another man pops up from behind Johnny suddenly. Fucking hell, he’s gorgeous too. Older, for sure, with a uniquely cut beard that would probably look rather silly on anyone less handsome. At it stands, he manages to make it appear dignified.

“Ah, jus’ about tae call fer ye, Cap. This is our neighbor.” Johnny gestures toward you.

“John Price.” The man steps forward to shake your hand. It’s firm and professional and thank god your grandad made you practice a good handshake as a kid or you’d be painfully embarrassed.

“Are all UK men named John or is this just some sorta cult?” You blurt, unable to stop yourself from snickering at them.

Older John chuckles at you fondly, his facial hair giving him a pleasant U-shaped smile. “Be easier to remember that way, wouldn’t it? No, we’re with two others. Kyle and Simon. They’re out at the moment.”

“Kyle and Simon.” You repeat, nodding. Johnny, John, Kyle, Simon. “Are y’all in town long?”

“Indefinitely.” Is all Price gives you. It’s a tone that even someone as dense as you can recognize as ‘don’t ask more.’

You clap your hands together and smile a little wider, ready to make your exit. “Well, I’m not here t’be a bother, just wanted t’ welcome ya and, uh, let y’know that I have a lot of people over throughout the day - I’m a nail tech. They shouldn’t bother ya but y’know.”

“Ye can come bother us anytime, bonnie.” The Scot hits you with that grin again and your face suddenly feels far too hot.

A loud, whining screech sounds off from down the road. You check your watch. Holy shit, three-thirty already. You begin to back off the porch. “Ah, nice t’ meet ya again! See ya ’round!”

As you jog down the little dirt road of the trailer park another black car passes you. It’s smaller, a sedan. You make very brief eye contact with a blonde wearing a surgical mask and another man with the sharpest golden eyes you’ve ever seen - even through the tint of the window.

*Kyle and Simon,* you think.

You make a mental note to greet them at some point and continue down the street. The school bus slowly stops at the entrance and you take up your spot in the small crowd of parents. IT’s a shabby old bus - chipping paint and break pads that sounds like they’re about ready to snap. It’s all they’re willing to send out to your little section of the city, though.

Shelby meanders over in your direction, her usual Camel Crush lit up in one hand and the other teasing her already well-lifted hair. “Afternoon. Saw there was some new folks across from ya.”

“Hm?” You keep your eyes on the bus. “Ah, yeah. Just vacationers, I think.”

“Lookers, though.” She chuckles.

“They’re from the UK.” You offer.

“No shit!” Shelby stamps out her cigarette as the bus doors open. “Accent and all?”

“Yep.” You grin.

Shelby tsks and fiddles with her hair again. “I best go over an’ make myself known, then.”

“There’s an older fella with a neat beard. Think you’d like ‘em.” You snicker.

She hums. “I’ll bring a pie.”

The children practically burst out of the bus doors, as always. Ready to be home and shuck off their backpacks to their respective adult. Shelby’s son almost knocks her over, offering a little “Good afternoon, ma’am!” to you before heading off with his mother.

You nod to him, shoving a hand in your pocket as you wait for yours. She’s always the last. Always caught up in a book or something and doesn’t realize it’s time to get off of the bus. Sure enough, the driver has to call back to her before the little girl comes dashing out. She jumps off of the bus steps, despite being told time and time again not to, and kicks a rock on her way toward you.

You bow low for her. “Welcome home, Lady Sophie.”

She giggles, dark curls bouncing as she skips over. “Ni-ni!”

You take her bag from her. The thing really does dwarf the poor six year old. Her hand slips into yours easily. Soft and round and somehow always so much warmer than yours.

“My nail color chipped!” She announces, holding up her ring finger on the opposite hand.

“Oh! Now we can’t have that. I’ll fix it tonight.” You smile, waving at old Mr.Chester as the two of you pass.

“Well now!” He calls. “How blessed am I to see two such lovely ladies!”

You both giggle, continuing on your way. He’s a good landlord - spotted you more than a few times when Sophie was a baby and you couldn’t work consistently. Honestly, as you look around, the little community that he’s managed to build in this shitty corner of the world should be praised. Housing just enough snowbirds to cover his property costs while keeping rent low for the full time locals. Maybe you could convince Natalie at the paper to run a little story on it or something.

As you pull up to your own home, the blonde man is outside leaning on the front of their double wide. Seeing him standing at full height makes your blood run cold. The man is built like a damn barn - tall and wide. Beyond solid. *Brick shithouse*. It’s a bit weird that he’s covered in clothing head to toe but whatever. Weirder things have happened before. The mask still covers his face, you wonder if he had taken it off before you came up or just flipped it up to smoke.

“Sophie, head on in. I’ll catch up.” You push her toward the door. She scampers in, the screen door slamming behind her as you march up to the brick shithouse of a man in front of you.

“Which are ya? Kyle or Simon?” You smile, holding out your hand to shake.

Dark eyes rake over you, stopping briefly on your hand, before moving back to meet yours. He stomps out the half smoked cigarette. “Simon.”

You let your hand drop. Bit rude, this one. “Nice t meetcha.”

The other man pops his head out of the trailer. Kyle, you assume. “Oh. Hello.”

“Hi.” You smile as warmly as you can, giving your name. “I’m assumin’ yer Kyle.”

“Yeah.” He chuckles. “I’m guessing you’re the neighbor Price mentioned.”

You nod, about to speak again but Simon shoves past you, marching his way up the steps. “Let’s go.” He grunts, pushing the other man back into the trailer despite his protests.

You wrinkle your nose at him. What an asshole.

“Who’s tha’?” Sophie asks over the back of the old, worn couch as you let the trailer door slam behind you.

“New neighbors.” You say simply, glancing out the window. “Don’t go over there without me, yeah?”

“Okay!” She agrees, sitting back on the couch and bouncing, beginning her usual post school chant. “Bluey! Bluey! Bluey!”

You drop her backpack down beside the small coffee table. “After yer homework.”

“Nooo!” She pouts.

“Then no Bluey.”

Sophie pouts harder but crawls down in front of the coffee table and pulls out her little work sheets. At least the school doesn’t over run them too terribly with homework toward the end of the year. You glance at the calendar. Wednesday, May 22nd. Damn, she really only has about a week left. Though, you’d be lying if you said you weren’t looking forward to this summer break with her. She’s old enough now that you can take her places like the arcade without having to wait on her so much. You’ll actually be able to play some of the two-player games.

Plus, this year, you actually have a little more pocket change to make it fun.

You turn to look out the window once more at the new neighbors. Their curtains remain closed, cars neatly parked out front. The door opens slowly, the hot Scot and rude blonde wander to the Sedan. Simon’s shoulders shake at something Johnny said - you think he’s laughing but its hard to tell with that mask. Johnny’s head turns, blue eyes meeting yours through the shitty glass windows of your trailer. You squeak and duck to sit next to Sophie, praying that he didn’t catch you staring.

#simon x reader #fanfiction #simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #simon riley x you #fanfic #call of duty #plus size reader #fat reader #ghost cod #cod x reader #cod mw2 #holly writes

[ticktokrobotsnot]

Cooking Up Speculations

Pairing: Carmen Berzatto x fem!reader

Summary: With y/n rushing around to doll herself up for an event, it's only a matter of time before things get out of hand.

Word Count: 6.7k

Notes: I have never written something like this before, and I thought I would give it a shot. I haven't checked the grammar, but if Google Docs missed anything, that's none of my business.

warning: alcohol and mentions of throwing up out of nervousness but no one actually does, or even comes close.

__

The prep work was close to done and for once in The Bear’s short existence it was not a screaming disastrous mess. Everyone was on track and prepared, the sauces were sitting in the fridge, the cakes were waiting to be sliced, the rolls were warm and ready to be cut open and it was all thanks to (y/n) coming in extra early this morning. She had started the prep work for most of the chefs that had yet to arrive in the effort of softening the blow. She would be abandoning them for the dinner rush on what was predicted to be a very busy day.

What sport was being played? Who is playing? And who won were all unknown to y/n but all she knew was that the restaurant was going to be filled with rowdy and obnoxiously drunk men who were going to make everyone’s life miserable and she was going to get a “get out of jail free card”. She felt a small pang of guilt for basically leaving them for dead but sacrifices had to be made and if she could cover anyone’s shift with little to no notice she was allowed one day to herself.

The restaurant was expecting the dinner rush to crawl in at about 6:30 pm which left y/n about an hour and a half to get ready. Y/n was finishing up cutting up some garnishes so that everything would be perfect. The sounds of a spoon slapping skin was approaching and y/n knew that she needed to state her case convincingly so she could leave early. Fighting the urge to not bring anything up, work through her shift and miss her event was deviously tempting but with a deep inhale she put the knife down and turned on the balls of her feet.

Her (e/c) eyes meet his and before she could choke out a lame excuse as to why she was blocking him she spit out, “I was wondering if I could have a word with you.”

Carmen looked expectantly, he thought she was going to ask him to taste test the braised beef she had just finished prepping, or ask an obscure question about the food science between ingredients. Y/n had once asked if he found it annoying during one of their late night clean up sessions and he said it was a nice change of pace and he really didn’t mind. How could he when you were so eager to learn?

Y/n didn’t want to do this out here, people are working and if she was going to beg, which is how she expected the next 5 minutes to go, she didn’t want any witnesses. The damage that would do to her pride would force her to change her name, move to Vegas and make money by selling timeshares to idiot tourists.

She cleared her throat, “Privately, chef”

Although his face didn’t betray anything, y/n knew that she had caught him off guard. After a while of spending most of their time together cleaning the kitchen after hours and talking about every minute detail in their lives, y/n knew that she had raised a few alarm bells in Carmen’s head. If she paid attention she could hear the sounds of a car alarm blaring in the back of his head signifying that he thought something was wrong. He always assumed the worst possible would happen, like he was waiting for the other shoe to drop.

He wordlessly guided y/n to his office. The door was closed and it felt like they were transported to a different dimension where there was nothing outside but the vacuum of space, it was just the two of them in this room and if one of them were to leave the outside pressure would make their body implode and smash into the size of a ping pong ball. She really didn’t want any of them to leave.

With a silent inhale, “I have to leave early today.”

Carmen softened the crease in between his eyebrows, “ Yeah sure, take the day off.” The imaginary crisis was averted and the car alarm stopped blaring in Carmen’s head.

Y/n was surprised that he was being so easy today. Y/n had yet to ask for a day off but she had spent last night imagining the worst possible scenarios possible, she would get yelled at, rejected, or worst he would guilt her for leaving them to deal with the upcoming shit storm.

“Honestly, I was expecting a bit more of a fight.” Y/n joked, “I even made this whole pitch to convince you.”

“ I can hear the pitch so that it doesn’t go to waste,” Carmen said with a glint of humour in his eyes.

Carmen was giving her an inch and so she might as well take the whole mile. Knowing she was about to push her luck and Carmen’s patience a bit more she continued.

“I came in at 4am and started everyone’s prep and helped Tina with the sandwiches during lunch, and did all of Syd’s prep because she had that doctor’s appointment. And I think it's cruel and unusual that you wouldn’t give me a day off when all I did today was prove how much of an angel I am. The least I can get is a measly day off…What you're not gonna give me a day off you selfish prick? You see this is what always happens, little guys always get pushed aside by the Big man. Carmen you're supposed to be better than those billionaire pricks who probably hunt their interns for sport. And I think it's so unfair that I grace you and this business with my presence and I don't even get a single day off- ” Carmen let out an exhale from his nose and covered his mouth with his hand to hide his smirk. The move had almost made y/n fall to her knees, the way his hair was tousled, the way he looked up at her with his sharp blue eyes, the tattoo flexing on his hands that were a calloused and dry from years of washing them nearly a hundred times a day, the veins trailing up from his hands to under his white shirt.

“Okay, I get gist.”

Y/n knew he didn’t ask for an explanation but she wanted to keep him here for just a bit longer.

“I have this thing I have to go to and I live too far away to go home and change so I need your office to get ready. I would get changed and stuff in the bathroom but the lighting is really bad, the outlets don't work, it’s smelly-”

After a quick glance at his watch he realised that he had a few vendors coming by and he needed to get back to the kitchen. “I know, that bathroom is a real shit show. I told Fak to fix it but nothing he fixes lasts for very long. The office is yours.” Carmen rushed out.

“I'm going to be here till 12 so if there is anything you need me to do before I leave just give me a holler.”

Carmen gave a nod of appreciation before his eyes lingered on her face for a second before grabbing a few papers and a clipboard and then opening the door to leave. It was stupid and childish but y/n held her breath wondering if he would be crushed to the size of a ping pong ball as soon as he left but when she heard him yelling at Richie she knew that the “alone in space” fantasy had died.

Y/n slipped out and went to her locker where she pulled out a dress, makeup and a straightening iron. She had an hour and a chance to make herself look like she just came out of a Mattel box and it was a daunting task for someone who didn’t have much experience dressing up.

Makeup was a bit of a disaster at first because she didn’t want to ruin any of Carmy’s papers but after she accidentally dabbed a bit of concealer on a light bill she just stopped giving a fuck and finished up. The hair was tricky, the outlet was near the ground and she had to crouch to straighten her hair.

The last and most daunting task was the dress because y/n was about to strip in her bosses office and although she had dreams about something this amazing, the reality was much less sexy. In a small burst of paranoia she rolled the chair over to the door so no one would walk in by accident and quickly changed. In the back of her mind all she was thinking about was the small glimmer of hope that Carmy would be the one to walk in. In reality, it would be Rich or Fak because boundaries were a foreign concept to the both of them.

And with 10 minutes to spare, y/n was done. She sprayed some perfume and hyped herself up to leave. She knew she would get teased so she wanted a smooth exit, an Irish goodbye would be perfect, fingers crossed hoping that Richie was out back so she would get out before he made these stupid jokes.

After a few deep breaths, y/n picked up her things and opened the door. The coast was clear and she made a beeline to the lockers to grab her purse, change her shoes and go. She would leave most of her stuff, because if you want to survive you have to be light, like those firefighters that ditch their equipment so that they don't get burned alive. Everyone looked busy and with a quick once over, y/n tried to walk through the kitchen. And although women and heels have had centuries of history, the heels still managed to betray her at the very end. The long sound of heel on tile brought Syd’s head up. Y/n eyes widened as she shook her head as to signal to Syd to drop it but Syd let out a playful gasp and Y/n knew that the jig was up.

“You look amazing.”

And a sea of eyes were looking at y/n.

“You get all dressed up for me?” Syd joked and for a split second y/n wondered if she could make a run for it before she realised that she would fall and crack her head open.

“Who else?” Y/n joked back hoping to get out before she was held captive by their questions.

“You look so nice, where are you headed?” Tina said as she came closer and dragged you closer to everyone.

“Umm- I was actually going to-”

“You know who you look like?” One of those women who seduces James Bond at a casino.” Sweeps commented unhelpfully. A hum of agreement was shared among the crew. Y/n’s face grew warm.

“So where are you going?”

“A date, women don't dress like that if it's not for a date” Ebra chimed in.

Another gasp, “ IS it a date, is he handsome?” Sydney probed.

“Actually, I'm not- '' Y/n tried to finish before she was interrupted.

“What type of car does he drive?”

“We'll see when he picks her up. When is he picking you up?”

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU CLOWN JABBERING ABOUT '' Richie burst through the door to see what all the commotion was about and he looked like he was in utter disbelief.

“I didn’t know that it was possible for you could look like that”

Y/n was slightly offended.

“You normally look like death.” Richie laughed. Scratch that y/n was very offended.

“I could look like this everyday if I wasn’t in front of a stove, you clown.”

Ignoring her, Richie asked the room,“ Where is she headed?”

“A date”, Sweeps added.

“I'm going to my friends-” y/n tried to interject.

“A date huh, our little y/n is all grown up now. Soon we’ll be sending her off to college.” Wiping a fake tear and leaning on Tina for mock support, “They leave the nest so soon, it was like it was just yesterday when I saw her struggling to walk.”

“It WAS yesterday and I was only struggling because I hit my knee on the shelfs in the walk-in.”

“Who’s the guy?” Richie asked

“ Your dad.” Y/n knew it was childish and unoriginal but she was too flustered to be a bit more creative.

Richie ignores her and continues, “You know what you look like? You look like one of those girls who kills Johns”

“Are you saying I look like a prostitute?”

“A classy one for like the president and shit.”

“or an ambassador,” Ebra added.

“or a CEO,” Richie continued.

Y/n knew it was going to be tough but she wanted to get out before she was stuck forever.

“I have to go now, I’ll see you guys bright and early tomorrow. Richie you suck major ass. And just so you know, i'm not going on a-”

Carmen walked in with a clipboard and a pen not even sparing a glance up.

“Ok, I just got the beef delivered so we should have enough for Ebra till the end of the week.”

“Heard, chef”

“And Marcus”, who watched the whole thing and didn’t offer any help to y/n except the occasional chuckle.

“I have your eggs”

“Heard, chef”

Although no one said it, everyone was waiting for the moment that Carmen looked up and saw y/n. The dishwashers who never really left their stations shut off the water and were subtly watching this mess unfold.

It was the longest that y/n had seen Richie quiet. He just stared at Carmen, while hiding his mocking smile under the guise of rubbing his stubble.

“I know we are low on onions but the guy is coming in a bit so sit tight”

“Heard”

Maybe, y/n thought, she would be able to walk past Carmen unnoticed if she walked on the balls of her feet so that the heels made less noise. Y/n took a step forward to hightail it out of here so she could make it in time and even though the heel was a lot quieter then last time, the unusual silence in the kitchen made it impossible to disguise the sound.

The sound of heels on tiles brought Carmen back to reality.

He looked up and y/n didn’t know if she imagined it but she thought she saw him raise his eyebrows. And if she was really going to feed into her delusions, she would say that his eyes widened and his pupils dilated too.

All that came crashing down thought, because after a beat of silence barring the sounds of sizzling and bubbling. Carmen questioned, “I thought you would have left by now chef.”

“I got held back but I really do need to leave now. I'm going to miss you guys and I’ll see you bright and early tomorrow.” And with a quick wave y/n brushed shoulders with Carmen as she left. The smell of her perfume lingered and Carmen felt a bit dizzy.

Carmen wanted to ask where y/n was going but he didn’t want to overstep any boundaries, not when the two of you have already gotten so close. Richie had different plans, “Hey cousin guess where y/n going?”

“I don’t know cousin, that isn’t really any of our buis-”

“She is going on a date”

“A hot one” Syd chirped

“With a nice car” Ebra added

Richie’s comment felt like a ton falling on his head. Now he felt a different type of dizziness. He quickly composed himself

“Chefs, we have a dinner rush coming, now is not the time.” Carmen said with a bit of an edge.

Richie led Carmen to the front under the guise of asking a question about the tablet. The crew looked around and shared a knowing snicker.

“I can't believe that you let her go like that?” Richie added. “Right now she is in some guy's car about to get wined and dined to high heaven while you wait here with your cock in your hand like some cuck.”

“ Cuck?” Carmen said with venom, it's like he was giving Richie a chance to take it back before he killed him.

“I would be fucken pissed. I wouldn’t let someone take my girl out like that, all dressed up for someone who isn't me”

For a second Carmen imagined you sitting across from your rich new date with the nice car and the handsome face and felt like throwing up. He was angry, he was angry with this “date”, he was angry at Richie for saying all that stupid shit to get a reaction, and embarrassingly enough he was angry at y/n. He had no right to be but he just couldn’t help it.

“Richie if you don’t knock it off, I’m going to send you flying out the fucking window”

“Yes, chef.” Richie mockingly replied.

And with a swift turn Carmen returned to the kitchen with a different temperament then he had 10 minutes ago.

The dinner rush was a nightmare, but the kitchen was hell. There wasn’t a single thing that didn’t set Carmen off. He wasn’t screaming like he was with the to-go orders but he was on edge. They could feel it when they had to remake dishes because he didn’t like them, or when they had to listen to him criticise innocuous things after housekeeping. When that dinner rush ended, the crew looked like they wanted to be anywhere else but there. The second the restaurant closed, chefs cleaned as fast as they could to get the hell out of there. It was the fastest they had cleaned since the morning rush with the pre-orders.

With a quick goodbye, everyone but Carmen left the restaurant hoping that he would be in a better mood tomorrow.

Carmen did what he did every night, got on his knees and scrubbed the floor with a towel. Carmen knew it was unfair and he knew he had no right to dictate what you did. You weren’t his and he waited too long. A part of him understood where y/n was coming from, during one of their late night conversations he had mentioned that he had never had a girlfriend and he didn’t really have the time. This conversation took place some time after the two had gotten close but before he realised that he might have liked her for quite some time. Things were different now and Carmen wanted more.

He tried his best to be understanding but the thought of y/n clinging onto someone else’s arm and laughing at their stupid unfunny joke, made him livid. What if they kiss? Or what if they sleep together?” That thought made him stop scrubbing and sit on the balls of his feet and throw the wet towel with an unnecessary amount of force to another corner of the kitchen. He couldn’t do this today, he couldn’t be here. He got up and cleaned up the towel and bucket of dirty soap water and walked home.

He ended his night with a nightcap hoping that he would fall asleep easily but it didn’t work. He spent a good amount of time staring at y/n contact hovering over the call button before flaking out because it was 2 in the morning and he had to get to work at 6:30. Maybe Richie was right and he was a coward but before he could think too long, sleep had overcome him.

The restaurant was a bit of a walk away from Carmen’s house but he never minded it before, it felt like a good buffer between “Home Carmen” and “Work Carmen”. Today was different, he couldn't not think about y/n and that annoying date of her’s so for the first time in his time in Chicago he listened to music on his way to work. The music was so loud that it was just obnoxious noise and allowed him to stop worrying for a few moments. Carmen couldn’t think about y/n without feeling a bit… he didn’t know how he felt he just knew it was not a great feeling.

Being the first one in the restaurant was not new to him but it felt strange that after 30 minutes he was still the only one there, normally y/n would be there by now asking Carmen about a baking show they both happened to catch the night before, or ask what he ate for dinner last night and breakfast this morning. Carmen would always fight the urge to lie and say that he cooked something magnificent when in reality he probably ate a bag of chips and drank some flat soda. One of the things that these AA meetings emphasised was honesty, to both himself and others, and even if it was embarrassing he told you the truth. You never really judged him because you did the same thing.

After sorting through fuck ton of bills, a few of which had brown power on them and one of them had a (s/c) smudge on the corner he heard a buzz in his pocket. He looked at it hoping it was you saying that you'll be there any second.

(Y/N): I'm so sorry to do this to you but I'm going to be a bit late today, not super late but like an hour. I have to grab my extra apron from my place and I'm a bit far from there. I'll be there by 8 the latest. Again, super sorry :(

Carmen read the text a few times to check if he read that right, you were going to be late because you weren't home and slept somewhere else and needed a change of clothes. Which translated to, you were with someone else, which means you might have done something with someone else. He just stared at the text for a few more seconds before he heard the sound of the front door opening, Carmen didn’t have to look to know it was Sydney. He snapped out of it and sent back an “ok”, lowercase just to be a bit petty. Was it immature? Yes. Did he regret it? Not really.

Y/n spent the rest of her food budget for the week yesterday in a drunken haze with an uber from one side of Chicago to the other. The bachelorette party was a success and y/n was glad that her friend had a good time at the fancy restaurant that she picked out. Y/n was trying to be responsible and limit herself to a few drinks but it's hard to say no to the bride to be and before she knew it she had to leave her car at the restaurant because they took her keys and y/n and her friends crammed into an uber headed towards one of the bridesmaids houses.

Y/n woke up in a hurry, she grabbed a random shirt and joggers from her friends closet because all she had was that dress, which now had wine spilled on it. She quickly gathered her things and texted the group chat that she had to leave early so she could get to work. They would read it when they woke up. Not repeating yesterday’s mistakes she took the train to the restaurant, got her keys back and drove at illegal speeds to get to her place where she took a shower, changed back into her friends clothes because she was way behind on laundry. She took one last look in the mirror before grabbing the apron and sprinting out the door to drive to work. She got there at 7:30am and she felt like death. The hangover was finally catching up to her, and she poured herself some water from the dispenser out front. She knew everyone was in the kitchen by now. She gave herself a few more seconds of quiet before she opened the door to the kitchen and gave a quick hello and rushed towards the lockers to put her stuff in and change into her non-slip shoes and apron.

Richie raised his eyebrows. This was too good, it was too easy, all he needed was for Carmy to get out of that depressing office of his to bear witness to this.

Richie was the first to ask, “New shirt? Never seen it before? ”

“Good Morning to you Richie, if you need to know I borrowed it from my friend.”

Carmen wanted to rush out as soon as he heard your voice but he refrained. He promised himself that he would give you a bit of space to respect you and your date/boyfriend. That didn’t stop him from listening through the door.

“Some friend you got there, real close.” Richie jokes

y/n didn’t know what he was talking about, “Friends tend to be close, Richie. You would know that if you had any.” Y/n barked back.

“How was it?” Syd asked as she sliced what looked like gallons of onions.

Y/n knew that last night was probably a good night but she was so drunk then and so hungover now that it all made her a bit nauseous to think about.

“Honestly, I don't remember much but I do know it was fun.”

“Hungover?” Tina asked.

“Very, my whole body feels like i was run over by a semi”

Marcus handed y/n a gatorade before going back to work with the cakes.

“You come back to us in new clothes, showered, late, hungover, and sore. You must have one hell of a night!” Richie said louder than necessary just so that Carmen would hear, he had a feeling that Carmy was eavesdropping.

“Im telling you guys i didn’t actually go on a-”

Carmen didn’t want to hear anything after Richie spoke because he felt like he was going to hear something he didn’t want to know. He picked up a clip board, slammed the door open and began walking around.

“Chef.” Carmen said mechanically

“Chef.” Y/n replied back fully expecting this, she left early, came late and was now distracting everyone.

Y/n quickly busied herself with peeling garlic and the rest day fell back to its usual rhythm. The prep finished right before the restaurant opened and they worked on filling to-go orders along with the regular lunch and dinner orders. One thing was noticeably different to y/n, Carmen hadn’t looked or approached her once. Normally he would walk by all the chefs and ask how they were doing, checking the quality, etc but the second he got to y/n who was at the far end of the kitchen he circled back. He made comments to everyone’s dish and he had yet to even get within a 3 feet radius on y/n.

Y/n could feel that something was off and to test it, after the dinner rush she finished making one of the test items that Sydney and Carmen had wanted to try out and after a small taste she knew she killed it.

Y/n walked up to Carmen with the dish and set it down. “Can you taste it and tell me what you think?” Carmen didn’t look up, he just grabbed a fork, took a bite and said a quick “It's fine, chef”.

Y/n then looked the dish over to sydney and asked her to try it.

“It added a bit of chocolate because I read somewhere that Japanese people put chocolate in their curry”

“Chocolate huh?” Sydney grabbed a small notebook and made a note.

“It’s okay?” y/n asked.

“It's fire, chef. Great work”

In y/n mind that confirmed that something was wrong with Carmen. Y/n waited till the restaurant closed and everyone left to bring it up. It was just Carmen and y/n alone in the restaurant and y/n could feel there was something in the air.

“You don't have to stay late, you should leave early” Carmon proposed while not looking at her.

That was strange because Carmen never asked her to leave early. She walked up to Carmen who was sweeping the floor and ripped off the bandaid.

“Thanks for the offer but I want to stay with you for a bit longer.” Carmen’s grip on the broom toughened till his knuckles turned white. It was a risky thing to say and after a beat of silence y/n took the coward’s way out by diverting and changing subjects.

“I'm sorry I was so late today Carmen, are we good?”

“We're good.”

Another awkward silence.

“ I don’t think we're good, you seem, I don't know, pissed?”

“I'm good, you're good, we’re good” Carmen said by turning his attention to a very interesting onion skin on the floor.

“You didn’t say anything about the dish I made, or that I was late. Someone told me that you seemed off yesterday.”

“Was this someone named Sydney?”

“Cannot confirm or deny, Carmy”

Carmy finished sweeping and took a few steps back.

“There it is again! You keep walking away from me and not looking me in the eye.”

Carmen didn’t know that he was being obvious, he thought he was subtle because Richie would have brought it up if he wasn’t. Carmen forced himself to look up at y/n and felt like the wind was knocked right off his lungs, he really hadn’t seen her at all today and he missed her.

“You can tell me what's happening so that I can help or at the very least listen to what's wrong.” y/n offered

Carmen bent down, and started to scrub in silence. He looked like he was piecing something together and y/n didn’t want to intrude so she continued to scrub assuming the conversation was over and that they were going to spend the rest of their lives in this uncomfortable silence. A few minutes pass and then a long sigh is heard from the other end of the kitchen. Carmen looked up.

“I’ve been a bit..” Carmen started. Y/n wanted him to finish his thought before she called him a dick.

“It's been a weird day.. I know it shouldn’t but I can't help but ask..”

A pregnant pause passed.

“How was..” y/n leaned in so she could hear.

“How was your “thing” yesterday?” He spit out.

Y/n looked a bit confused, “Umm it was fine, I mean we were at a restaurant so it wasn’t anything to crazy”

“Why were you so late today?”

The other shoe dropped, “ I knew you were pissed that I was late.” With an exhale she continued “We went to dinner and then got shit faced drunk and ubered over to a friends house. I had to go by that restaurant in the morning to pick up my keys and drive to my place so I could take a shower and not smell like a walking liquor store.”

“How was he?” Carmen choked out after a few more beats of silence.

“How was who?”

“Your umm…”

“Mmm” Carmen continued.

Y/n waited but it felt like he was testing her patience,

“Your date?” Carmen finally conceded while swinging his head down.

“What date? I went to a bachelorette party with a few of my girlfriends.”

Carmen’s head shot up, “ I thought-”

“The people in here are so nosy, I kept telling them that it wasn't a date and they wouldn’t bother to listen.”

Carmen’s shoulders relaxed and he felt like he could finally look at you without feeling guilty that he was looking at another guy’s girl.

“What’s been on your mind, Carm?” Y/n probed and Carmen's shoulders tensed up again.

Y/n could feel the atmosphere change and she wanted to capitalise on it while she still could, she could trick herself into thinking that Carmy was jealous of some imaginary guy that he thought she went on a date on, when he probably was just diverting attention to avoid talking about his own problems.

More silence.

More scrubbing.

Carmen looked up with a look of determination, y/n assumed that he had finally hyped himself to tell her what has been bugging him. Although the tension was killing her she did want this moment to last for a bit longer. In this moment she could convince herself that Carmen was troubled because of her and not because work was drowning him or that he is a mess because his brother left him this shithole and left.

She wanted him to have a problem with an easy solution. If he liked her, the easy solution was that she would kiss him and tell him how much she longed for him. He would then confess how much he yearned for her and she would give all of herself to him and he would finally have a win in his life, something that wasn’t tainted by his love/hate relationship with cooking, his family, his brother. Something that he would have all to himself, her love.

Just for a few moments she repeated, that's how long she had till the dream died. This wasn’t the first time something similar had happened. They would stay late and in the comfortable beats of silence Carmen would look up with such a look of determination and y/n heart would flutter hoping for those three special words but she would get something completely different but still equally important, information about a very private part of his life whether it be the AA meetings, or the guilt he felt for resenting his brother. And everytime y/n’s heart would break a bit and then mend itself knowing that even if she couldn't have him like she wanted to, she would still be important to him.

That type of relationship, friendship, used to be enough, but not anymore. With his plans to change The Bear he was getting further and further away from her. It used to feel like it was the two of them but y/n was starting to wonder if she was going to be left behind. If she would stay friends for a while until the longing grew too strong and y/n would leave The Bear. Even if Carmen misses her for a while, y/n knew he would bounce back like he always did and she would slowly be replaced by Sydney or whoever. The thought that in a few years he will have learned to cope with his grief and trauma and move on from the past, move on from y/n, and maybe settle down with someone else made y/n feel like throwing up.

This time y/n didn’t fall for Carmen's “look”, she had a neutral face and was ready to hear what Carmen's issues were. She wouldn’t assume that she was going to get a confession. This time she will help him with his problems and move on from this one-sided crush. Maybe she WILL go on a few dates to forget about him.

“Carmen, do you want to talk about it?We don’t have to do anything you don't want to.”

Determination morphed into apprehension.

“I am feeling something, it is n-n-not…” He exhaled through his nose.

”It's selfish y/n. I'm being selfish. You have every right to do whatever you want but I..”

Y/n tried to look as comforting as possible trying her best to hide any confusion, if Carmen was any other person she would ask if he was sober right now because he was a total mess.

“I’ve never done this before, and I-” and he ran his palm through his hair.

Y/n refrained from thinking about how amazing he looked under the fluorescent lights with his tousled hair and apprehensive gaze. He could bring up his nightmares or sleepwalking, and she would feel so guilty for perving over his eyes.

“You looked very nice in that dress yesterday.” Y/n felt like a lump was forming in her throat. He was going to say something like this and think it's an off handed comment but she would go to the bathroom and cry because she knew nothing would come from it. Y/n thought it was a bit cruel.

“You looked so beautiful yesterday it was hard for me to look at you without making a fucking idiot out of myself. I wanted to run over to you and tell you that as soon as you left but Richie told me you're going on a date and it was…”

Carmen continued, “You are special and you deserve someone who isn’t…me. And you're free to do whatever and if this is completely …wrong…bad…i don't know, just stop me and we will never talk about this ever again…”

He searched y/n’s eyes looking for a sliver of doubt or disgust but he was met with glassy eyes and a look that longed for him to continue.

“When I thought you were going on that date I knew that I couldn’t not have you and that made me feel….” A sigh reverberated through the kitchen.

“ I like you…romantically.” Carmen uttered.

Y/n didn’t say or do anything for a moment, she spent a few moments wondering if she was hallucinating or dreaming. And in a moment of pure adrenaline, she scooted over to Carmen who was still on the floor before cupping his face in her hands and whispered, “Can I kiss you?”

The kiss wasn't electrifying; it felt like a wave of warmth seeped into every corner of their beings. It felt like dipping your hand in warm water after shovelling the show, the type of warmth that sends shivers down your spine. Y/n fingers get lost in his wavy hair and his hands hesitate, not knowing where they should go before landing one on her hip and the other on the back of her neck to pull her closer. Y/n heart was beating so hard she wondered stupidly if he could hear it, Carmen was wondering something similar. They slowly pulled away for air before getting a good look at each other, both their lips were swollen and red and their eyes were dazed.

Y/n knew he was a flighty person, one wrong move and he would go running for the hills so she refrained from asking if they were dating now, this could have just been a one time thing and she didn’t want to ruin it. Thankfully Carmen held her hand and stroked it with her thumb before swinging his head down and looking up at her.

“I want to be with you y/n”

“I like you too, Carmen, for a very long time.” And their lips meet once again.

Y/n resisted the urge to say that she only bought the dress in the hopes that he would take it off of her, that was a story for another time.

“Let's get you home” Carmen mumbled into her lips, the vibrations and the friction making her lips burn in sensitivity.

Carmen helped y/n get up before they both packed up their stuff and headed out the door. Both hiding the smile of triumph from each other, not really knowing how much the other loves them yet, and only time would remedy that.

#carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #carmy x reader #carmy x you #carmy #carmen berzatto #carmen berzatto x you #carmy berzatto #carmy the bear #the bear #the bear fic #carmen berzatto x y/n #carmen carmy berzatto #the bear x reader #the bear hulu #the bear imagine #carmen berzatto imagine #carmy berzatto x you #carmy berzatto imagine #jeremy allen white #jeremy allen white imagine

[merakiui]

I can definitely see single dad!Azul but also he looks like one of the sketchy business owners who hang out near resorts to con pretty ppl into buying outrageously priced things from his boutique. But that could just be my bias from playing the most recent en twst event. He has a nose for capitalism 🤣

Someone on twt said he looks like he’s about to sell you a timeshare LOL but also I can absolutely feel the vibes of a sleazy conman who will sweet-talk you into buying cheap goods for very high prices. Summer Azul reminds me so much of Laurent from Great Pretender and I’m losing my mind just a little from the comparison.

#twisted chit chat #it’s the smirk orz

[poetrysings]

Location: A street, any street really

Status: Open starter ( @bhqextras )

Joey's trained eye studied the crowd with attention and urgency, their hands nervously tapping on their jeans as they searched for a friendly face around them that looked approachable enough while they saw the seconds pass by, each tick in the back of their mind a reminder of how close they were to losing their job.

Had things gone as planned, Jo would be on their way to the radio station for their daily show with the guest of the century: a rapper they were once good friends with and had promised, sworn they'd be there on time for the interview. The radio DJ being the responsible person they were with things that actually mattered to them, had messaged the rapper first thing in the morning, every hour following since and had even showed up to their home two hours before the interview— where they had been informed their interviewee had left the city for some party in Salt Lake the night before and had completely forgotten their agreement and they had now a thirty-minute-long-segment-shaped-hole in their schedule their boss and most importantly, their listeners would hate.

Had it been any other day, they'd think on the spot of a story to tell, plan some interactive segment with the listeners or simply talk about their latest night escapade, the type of stories their listeners enjoyed. However, they were still partly hungover from last night and after two years, they were running out of stories to tell so they needed a Plan B: grabbing a passerby and pray they had an hour to spare to grant them an interview. From the corner of their eye, they saw a friendly set of features and, knowing they were running out of time, approached them with an almost pleading look on their face. "Hey, can I ask you for like a huge favor? I'm talking, 'I will probably owe you drinks for like a month straight' or 'I'll give you my first born or a non-vital organ' or 'I will really owe you one, I'm your ride or die now' type of favor. I know it sounds sketchy as hell, promise it's not and I'm not gonna try to sell you some weird timeshare or ask you to sign some petition— you listen to the radio?"

#boroughs.starter #📂 ⤷ 𝚏𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚍 𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛 : 𝚓𝚘𝚎𝚢 / interactions #feel free to assume connections if you want :)

[itsbenedict]

The Flood is a tabletop game by Jenna Moran about poetry mutilation and farmland financialization. Last August, Farn, Zero and I all played it. These are the results:

Where the Sidewalk Ends, by Shel Silverstein (maimed by me)

There is a place where sidewalk ends And right before the long street bends, And there the grass grows soft for friends, As under sun the road it wends And there the moon-bird rests from flight To cool in the peppermint night. Let’s leave this place where smoke blows white And dark streets wind away from sight. Yes, Ickle, Pickle, Tickle Too Go o’er sidewalk with flying shoe. “Hooray! What fun! It’s time we flew!” Say each and every -Ickle Too And Captain Ick drives Pick down streets While Tick cooks stews with beans and beets And higher, higher, in their seats Ick Pick and Tick chase sidewalk’s sweets. Past pits where asphalt flowers grow We walk a walk measured and slow, And watch where chalk-white arrows go To reach where sidewalk dare not flow. Yes, walk a walk measured and slow, And go where chalk-white arrows go, For children mark, and children know Where sidewalk ends, it ends fo’ sho’.

Question, by May Swenson (vivisected by @eternalfarnham)

Body my house my horse my spouse How will I rouse when you are soused Where will I sleep What tea will I steep What prey, like sheep Upon shall I leap Where can I go With my to all fro too late for the show How will I know in thicket ahead If my genes will spread when Body my shed- raised dog is dead How will it be to lie fancy free without cash to buy A house in Mai Lai With cloud for shift how will I grift? Body, mortgaged horse and house And rouses GDP from the thicket How can I rest? I’ll sell my shed-raised dog And we all lie fancy free in Mai Lai To profit without needing any grift But how am I meant to grift When I own such a profitable house, Comparable to a timeshare in Mai Lai And bring with them a faithful little dog Called Body to investigate thickets? Your wallet will ever be thick. It Will let you achieve results without grift Your investors? Like sheep. Just trust me, dog, Your body, like a temple, but, a house On such a venture? You can’t let this lie! But if you don’t want Mai Lai Or to eval treasures in the thicket, Away this deal, then turn to theft and grift Then let the cops slam you in the big house Where you’ll be eaten by a faithful dog. In this race I have no dog. Do I seem like the kind of girl to lie? If so, I’ll return to my giant house, Because I left you in the cruel thicket, And need therapy. But my guy has grift And back the world’s most profitable dog: The body of this poem is no grift. You can’t let this venture eternal lie As if dead, never roused from the thicket. You’ll thank me when you beat the gambling house. A thicket fit for capital’s running-dogs, In you I lie, and profit without grift.

untitled, by @cloakofshadow (grievously injured by Zerovirus)

The world was born in flame and gold, By decree of realm’s supreme, Fresh and free of painful earthly debts. You would not dare the market break, The world was born- then torn and sold, Creation’s value pierced the sky It pleases you to buy and buy and buy To know all things would surely grow in price. A thousand graphs housing bearish prices, That quaver tracking values of soft gold, Merchants follow but one goal supreme, Flee from spectres, shadows of your true debt. All souls are born in void, and break, So why not make some cash when they get sold Souls born in an empty void-like sky Know nothing but that they must buy buy buy. And all their reason works to buy Lights that cast no shadows but for price, Each night ursines fight for flecks of gold, Strive and strife and prove themselves supreme. Constant siblings are their death and debt, Each others’s skulls they crack and fiercely break. No use for pebbles that you cannot sell, No need for solid stone beneath the sky. And even you, who seeks the sky You would not dare not to buy; You’ve made the grave your lordly price And drawn all warmth from hoarded gold Atop which you take repose supreme Lest ye be taken by the cursed debt You fear to burn but shall be pleased to break What you hold but know can never sell. An empty place beside the antiques sold Rich linens shipped across the distant sky My lord has said, you shall not buy, You shall not spend, you shall not price, You shall be bold and uphold gold, You shall not fear the doom of debt, You shall fund the one true high supreme, Your assets shall not break. But wake again when you are broke, I make to you a flaming sell- And swear on god who rests in sky, That your name she sure shall buy, And till she returns next with a price, To labor for your pile of gold. Worry not about your debts, But sing praise towards the supreme. This world of gold that does not bend or break Where souls are sold and take with joy to sky The will of god is buy at any price! Debt is frail; your wealth shall reach supremes.

Apologies to the artists involved, but we did survive the Flood and made upwards of thirty three thousand imaginary dollars.

#poetry #(technically) #the flood #jenna moran

[all-the-things-2020]

No Better Place - Chapter 19

Summary: Cassidy breaks up with Javi and he throws himself into his work.

Word count: 3700

Cassidy woke late the next morning, Linus pawing at her face to tell her that his breakfast was late. She’d forgotten to switch on her alarm and it was nearly seven. She jumped up, shoved her feet into her boots and dumped a can of cat food into Linus’ dish before running out to the barn.

“Sorry, kids,” she said, as the horses all snorted at her. Even Cricket was impatient, kicking a hoof against the door of her stall. Cassidy tore open a bale of hay and started stuffing hay nets. Once she’d hung the fresh hay up in the stalls, she carefully measured out each horse’s grain and supplements. Cricket just got a few pellets to supplement her hay, since she was an easy keeper, but Buster and the mares needed to put on some weight, and they got pellets, grain and some supplements. Nugget was still on stall rest, so she fed him lightly, but he did get some grain mixed with his medications.

Once she’d hung the feed buckets in the stalls, she pulled, dumped, washed and refilled the water buckets. Only then did she head back to the house to pee and brush her teeth. As she entered the bathroom, she saw the pregnancy test sitting on the counter and the emotions of the night before came crashing down on her. She picked it up and threw it angrily into the trash can. She used the toilet, brushed her teeth and then decided to take a shower. She looked horrible. Her eyes were puffy from crying and her hair was a tangled mess.

The shower revived her a bit, and she managed a cup of coffee and a slice of toast before her throat threatened to close up again. “What am I going to do?” she asked Linus, who was sitting in the chair beside her, very helpfully cleaning his back legs.

It was clear that it was over between her and Javi but how to end it? Should she confront him about the woman in his apartment? Or just break things off? One thing was certain, she did not want to see him again. It would be too painful, and there was always the chance she’d lose her nerve once she was face to face with him. She’d had many opportunities to leave Travis that she left untaken just because he’d given her that grin. She wouldn’t give Javi the chance.

She could wait until he called, probably that night or the next, but what if he didn’t call and just drove down on Friday night or Saturday morning, showing up unannounced? “I’ll call him,” she told Linus. “After I know he’s left for work. I’ll leave a message on his answering machine and that’ll be that.” Linus looked up from his grooming, the tip of his tongue poking out of his mouth, bright pink and ridiculous. Cassidy sighed. “Then I’ll just have to deal with Chucho, but he should be easy enough to avoid.”

**************************************************************************

The next day was better, but Javi was still subdued as he went about his work. He would have worked through lunch again, except Monica forced him to walk to the deli down the street with her and a few other people. He ate half his roast beef sandwich and promised her he’d have the rest for dinner.

When he got home, he tossed the sandwich into the fridge and took off his jacket and tie. He flipped through the mail (all junk or bills, nothing interesting) and noticed the blinking red light on his answering machine. It was probably a telemarketer, trying to sell him insurance or a timeshare or some such nonsense. He pressed the play button, fully expecting to erase the message within the first few seconds.

“Hey, Javi, it’s Cassidy,” the tinny voice said. The speaker on this machine is crap, Javi thought. I need to get a better one. “Um, I don’t really know how to say this other than to just say it. I … I can’t do this anymore. It’s over, Javi. It’s not working and I feel like you need to focus on your life there in San Antonio. And I need to focus on my life here. I’ve been letting too much slide and I’m sure you have too and … well, I just think it’s best we end it now before things get out of hand. Goodbye, Javi. And good luck.”

He was stunned. He’d thought things were going well. True, he’d missed the last two weekends, but he’d been swamped at work and Cassidy had seemed to understand. He picked up the phone and dialed her number. After five rings, her machine picked up.

“It’s Javi,” he said. “Cassidy, pick up if you’re there.” He paused for several seconds, then went on. “Okay, I guess you’re out in the barn. Call me when you get back in. Please, Cassidy. Let’s talk about this.”

He hung up and fetched a beer from the fridge. He drank it and opened another one. Halfway through the second beer, he pulled the sandwich out of the fridge and ate a few bites. Finally, he couldn’t stand it anymore and he called her again.

“Hey, Cassidy,” he said when the machine picked up. “Come on, baby, talk to me. I don’t know what happened. Did I do something? Did I not do something? Tell me how I can make things right. I don’t want to lose you, Cassidy. I love you. So, call me back. Please.”

He turned on the television and watched some ridiculous sitcoms until ten, when a police procedural came on. He switched channels to a medical drama. Still no call from Cassidy. Before he went to bed, he called one last time.

“Cassidy, sweetheart, please, please, call me back. I don’t want it to be over. We can make this work. I’ll make sure I get home every goddamned weekend, baby, I’ll call you every night. Whatever you need to know that I’m one hundred percent committed to this relationship.” He sighed. “Okay, it’s late, I’m going to bed. I’ll call you again when I get home tomorrow, if you don’t call me first. I love you, hermosa.”

He got undressed and crawled into bed, but sleep eluded him for hours as he wracked his brain trying to figure out what could have triggered Cassidy’s decision to end their relationship. It just didn’t make sense.

********************************************************************

“You look like hell,” Monica said the next morning as soon as she saw him. “I know this thing with Andre is …”

He cut her off. “Cassidy broke up with me,” he said curtly as he dug in his desk drawer for a new pen. The one he’d been using kept skipping.

“What?” Monica plopped down in the chair he kept in the corner. “No way.”

He nodded wearily. “Yes,” he said. “There was a message on my answering machine when I got home yesterday. I called her back several times, but she’s screening her calls or something. I left messages …” He closed his eyes. “Look, I appreciate your concern, but I have a shitload of work to do and I’m sure you do, too. If I need to talk, you’re the first person I’ll come to, I promise.”

Monica bit her lower lip, clearly wanting to say more, but respecting his wishes. “Okay,” she said after a moment. “But I’m making sure you take your lunch again today. Nobody starves on my watch, no matter how bad life gets.” She stood up and tilted her head. “I know this week has been a clusterfuck, Javi, but you’ll get through it.” She smiled at him and left, pulling his office door halfway closed, giving him at least a modicum of privacy.

Javi opened the file on his desk and stared at the page. It was going to be a very long day.

**********************************************************************

There was another message on his answering machine when he got home. It was short and to the point. “Javier, please, stop calling. There’s nothing you can do. I’ve made my decision. It’s over between us. I’m sorry.”

The click at the end of her message had a finality about it that made Javi’s stomach clench. He took a few deep breaths and then dialed his father.

“She what?” Chucho shouted as soon as Javi had told him about Cassidy’s messages.

“She broke up with me,” Javi repeated. “Can you talk to her for me, Dad? She won’t pick up when I call and she asked me to stop calling. I don’t know what happened, but maybe she’ll tell you, or you can figure it out. I don’t know what to do, Dad.” He choked back a sob. He’d be damned if he’d cry in front of his father, even if it was over the phone.

“Of course,” Chucho said. “I’ll go over there tomorrow and ask her what the hell’s going on.” He snorted. “I’ll knock some sense into that girl’s head.”

“Don’t yell at her,” Javi pleaded. “Just … just talk to her, see if she’ll talk to me.” He sighed. “I knew she had misgivings about trying to make a long distance relationship work but I thought she was over it. I guess not.” He shook his head. “I’ll let you go, but thanks in advance for anything you can do.”

“You hang in there, mijo,” Chucho said. “I’ll try to fix this.”

******************************************************

“No,” Cassidy said firmly. Chucho was in the barn aisle and she was inside the tack room, the half closed door making a sort of barrier between then. “I don’t have anything to say to him. I thought about things and I realized that it’s not going to work. End of story.” She hoped Chucho couldn’t tell that her voice was about to crack. She turned away to fiddle with the bridles that were already hanging neatly on their rack.

“Cassidy,” Chucho sighed. “I don’t know why you have such a crazy idea stuck in your head, but please, promise me you’ll at least consider talking to Javi. He’s broken hearted.”

I’ll bet, she thought, unable to get the image of that woman leading him back inside his apartment out of her head. “If I change my mind, I certainly will call him,” she said, “but I don’t see that happening. I’m sorry, Chucho, but I can’t handle this long distance thing. And before you even think about it, I can’t move to San Antonio. I’m not a city girl and you know it.” She looked up at him. “Javi belongs in the city and I belong out here. Those are the facts. It sucks but it’s true.”

Chucho shook his head. “I still think you’re making a huge mistake, mija, but it’s your decision. I’ll tell Javi what you said and he won’t bother you again. And neither will I.” He turned and walked out of the barn, his shoulders slumped.

It broke Cassidy’s heart to see how this had affected Chucho, but she wasn’t about to tell him the truth, that she’d caught his son cheating on her. Let him think Javi was a decent man as long as possible. She was sure that once Javi had accepted that things were over between them, he’d tell his dad about this other woman. Unless she was just another one night stand, in which case, Chucho need never know.

********************************************************************

Javi hung up the phone. He’d hoped his dad could get through to Cassidy, but she’d proven just as stubborn with him as she’d been with Javi. He glanced at his watch. It was only eight thirty; plenty of time for a run to the liquor store for more whiskey and cigarettes. There was no reason to stop smoking now. If he was honest with himself, the only thing keeping him from getting stinking drunk was the need to be in the office the next day, the need to do everything he could to make sure none of the other kids in the program ended up like Andre.

Monica wisely avoided him the next morning, even though he was sure she wanted to lecture him on his rumpled clothes and the pack of cigarettes displayed prominently on his desk. She merely shook her head a little as he headed outside for a smoke break before their weekly meeting with the chief of police. He knew she was disappointed in him, but Javi didn’t give a damn. He was going to wallow in his misery as long as he could, knowing that if he went off the deep end, Monica would haul his butt back to shore.

He threw himself into his work, getting to the office at seven and often staying until eight o’clock or even later. He took work home on the weekends and started carrying a pager, letting everyone know he was only a phone call away. He even gave his number to some of the higher risk kids, telling them they could call any time of the day or night if they needed to talk. He spent more than one long night on the phone with Carlos or Leticia or Martin, doing his best to listen and not judge. If they made it to the next morning without using or running with their crew, he counted it a win. He worked with their schools to arrange for extra tutoring hours to keep them off the streets. He even forked over money for baby formula when Mom’s child support payment was late or gas money so a dad could make it to a job interview. He loaned out several of his ties for job interviews and taught a dozen boys how to tie a Windsor knot.

Every night, when he finally made it home, he poured a few fingers of whiskey, smoked far too many cigarettes, and ate junk that would make Monica cringe. The apartment was just a place to catch a few hours of sleep, take a shower, and maybe watch a movie on the VCR to escape reality for a while. Work was his life and it was all that kept him going.

Thanksgiving came and Javi told Chucho he had to work the day before and the day after, so there was no point in driving all the way to Laredo. While the police department never shut down, his department had been given Friday as a paid holiday as well as Thanksgiving Day, but Javi declined to tell Chucho this. He reluctantly joined Monica and her family at Rob’s mother’s place for Thanksgiving Dinner, but left as soon as he politely could.

“Stay for a while,” Rob pleaded. “Watch the game with us.”

“Thanks, man, but this is your family,” Javi replied. “You don’t need me bringing you all down. I’ll be okay.”

Monica pressed a paper plate of leftovers wrapped in foil into his hands. “Do not work tomorrow,” she said firmly. Javi couldn’t lie to her, so he didn’t answer. They both knew full well he’d taken home a stack of paperwork to keep himself occupied over the long weekend.

It was harder to avoid going home for Christmas, but Javi was saved at the last minute by a torrential storm that brought rain and hail and even brief flurries of sleet, leading to the closure of many highways and a flash flood outside Laredo that washed out the road that led to Chucho’s ranch.

“You might as well stay put, son,” he said on the phone. “By the time they get the roads cleared, you’ll be due back at work. You can come down and pick up your present later.” Javi promised to do just that, even though he and Chucho both knew he was lying. He hadn’t been home in months.

They did talk on the phone, though. Their conversations were stilted as they carefully avoided talking about Cassidy. Chucho mentioned seeing her around town now and then, but he was casual about it, mixing news of her in with the usual gossip about other people that Javi knew. She was working part time at the feed store, having taken over for Jenny the cashier, who was on maternity leave. Chucho also mentioned that someone had seen Cassidy working as a bagger at the grocery store, but he couldn’t confirm since it wasn’t the store he frequented. Dr. Hamblin mentioned in passing that Nugget was still not sound enough to ride, but Cassidy refused to sell him, for fear he’d end up at the slaughterhouse.

Hamblin had been on the ranch to treat Buster for a small abscess in his hind foot, the result of a stone bruise sustained while chasing a particularly obstinate cow through a gully. Cassidy had trailered him over to Chucho’s a couple of days after the breakup and sent Javi a formal letter stating that he should start paying his boarding fees to his father instead of her. Luis was riding him every few days and sang his praises every time he slid out of the saddle. Chucho joked that he was going to give him to Luis if Javi didn’t get his butt down there, but even though he missed the horse, Javi knew he couldn’t look at him without thinking of Cassidy, so he stayed away.

A few days after New Year’s, Monica dragged herself into Javi’s office. “You look horrible,” he said without thinking. It was true. Despite having a three year old and a five year old at home, she was always put together. On this day, she had no makeup on and looked pale.

“Hold that thought,” she said, dashing out of the room. When she came back a few minutes later, it was clear she’d thrown up.

“Hungover?” Javi asked. He’d never seen her drink more than one beer or glass of wine, so he was surprised.

“Morning sickness,” she mumbled, folding herself into the chair in the corner. “I told Rob to get a vasectomy, since the insurance company wouldn’t let me get my tubes tied, but he wouldn’t listen. So, we’re having number three.” She smiled weakly. “And I’m not letting him touch me again until he does get the snip-snip. Three kids is more than enough.”

“Congratulations, I guess,” Javi said, suppressing a laugh. “Is Rob freaking out?”

“Oh, at first he was all Mister Macho,” she said. “Then I reminded him he gets to take care of the little rug rat on top of the other two and that sobered him up quickly enough.” She leaned forward. “I didn’t come here to throw up on you, I promise. I wanted to show you something.”

She handed him a brochure. The cover featured a photo of a small boy with Down Syndrome on the back of a horse, smiling broadly. The words Blue Ridge Equine Therapy and Horse Rescue were at the top of the page.

“Nice,” Javi said. “But I don’t understand.”

Monica nodded at the brochure. “They mostly do kids with disabilities, developmental and physical issues, but the woman who runs it said she’d be open to doing some psychological therapy, too. I know you said working with your horse helped you with your depression after you quit the DEA. I was wondering if you think something like this could fit into our program.”

Javi flipped the brochure open. Photos of smiling children riding horses and brushing horses were scattered among paragraphs describing how the charity rescued horses from abusive homes and auctions where they were vulnerable to being sold to slaughterhouses. They retrained the horses and either adopted them out or used them in their therapy program in conjunction with a local hospital’s pediatric department.

Monica got out of her chair and came to stand beside him. She laid her hand on his shoulder. “I know it probably reminds you of Cassidy,” she said quietly, “which is why I didn’t bring it up sooner, but I think it might help our kids. Mary Sue -- yeah, that’s her real name -- said they could help with the new intake horses, get them used to being groomed and handled without being afraid, and then they could assist with the therapy sessions. They have volunteers who lead the horses around, others who help the kids get on and off the horses, stuff like that. There are physical therapists who are in charge of the actual therapy but they concentrate on the kids. Our kids could focus on the horses.”

Javi nodded. “Yeah, yeah, I think it’s worth looking into,” he said. “Set up a meeting with her and I’ll find out what kind of funding we might be able to get.” He leaned back in his chair. “If we can get some of these kids out of the city, even one day a week, show them there’s more to the world than their neighborhood and the mall, it’ll help us help them.”

Monica squeezed his shoulder. “Good,” she said. “I was afraid you’d be resistant … that it might remind you too much of …”

He laid his hand on top of hers, cutting her off. “I’m fine,” he lied. “And you’re right, I know first hand how helpful working with horses can be for mental health. I’d like to get a list of the kids in the program who have the most severe psychological issues, offer this to them first.”

“You got it, boss,” she said. “I’ll set up a meeting with Mary Sue and get that list to you as soon as I can. If I can get back to my office without barfing again.” She laid her hand against her stomach. “Don’t take this personally, Javi, but men suck.”

After she left, Javi took a few minutes to stare at the brochure again. He carefully traced the horse’s head in the cover photo. It was a dark bay, very much like Buster. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then shoved the brochure into his desk drawer and went back to the report he was typing up on the computer.

#javier peña x ofc #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena fic #javier pena narcos #javier peña #horses #pedro pascal character fanfiction

[kennysaysthings]

I’m so obsessed with the timeshare episode. Dennis goes on about how he’s not stupid enough to fall for it and then the second Mac says something about it being kinda nice he’s all ears. Wether it was being implied or not, this means time away from the gang at least some time, just them. Which is insane?? They spend every waking moment together at this point and they want more time together?? Just by themselves?? And sure the idea was they would sell it to other people but you know they were thinking they’d have SOME of the time for them.

Yk this was in my drafts for a long time and I just keep repeating “Dennis goes on about how he’s not stupid enough to fall for it.” Like are you kidding me. As if he feels like he’s not stupid enough to give in to Mac, as if he’s not dumb enough to just let it happen. But eventually, he has to doesn’t he? When Mac stops being the one to initiate things, when Mac stops confronting him about his feelings, he stops constantly showing affection to Dennis. What then? But he’s not stupid enough to just let it happen if Mac Is just going to do all this anyway. It would screw everything up if any part of this changed. And then it changes anyways.

#iasip #mac mcdonald #dennis reynolds #it's always sunny in philadelphia #macdennis #draft post #i apologize #just ranting #i’m sorry #mac and dennis move to the suburbs #except not really #it’s always sunny in philadelphia #timeshare #this episode #i have feelings #of course i have #feelings #i have thoughts

[marcsmarquez]

You can beat the heat if you beat the charges too

They said I was a cheat, I guess it must be true

And my friends all smell like weed or little babies

And this city reeks of driving myself crazy

Little did you know

Your home's really only a town you're just a guest in

So you work your life away

Just to pay for a timeshare down in Destin

Florida is one hell of a drug

Florida, can I use you up?

The hurricane with my name when it came

I got drunk and I dared it to wash me away

Barricaded in the bathroom with a bottle of wine

Well, me and my ghosts, we had a hell of a time

Yes, I'm haunted but I'm feeling just fine

All my girls got their lace and their crimes

And your cheating husband disappeared

Well, no one asks any questions here

So I did my best to lay to rest

All of the bodies that have ever been on my body

And in my mind, they sink into the swamp

Is that a bad thing to say in a song?

Little did you know

Your home's really only the town you'll get arrested

So you pack your life away

Just to wait out the shitstorm back in Texas

Florida is one hell of a drug

Florida, can I use you up?

I need to forget, so take me to Florida

I've got some regrets, I'll bury them in Florida

Tell me I'm despicable, say it's unforgivable

At least the dolls are beautiful, fuck me up, Florida

I need to forget, so take me to Florida

I've got some regrets, I'll bury them in Florida

Tell me I'm despicable, say it's unforgivable

What a crash, what a rush, fuck me up, Florida

It's one hell of a drug

It's one hell of a drug

Love left me like this and I don't want to exist

So take me to Florida

Little did you know

Your home's really only a town you're just a guest in (take me to Florida)

So you work your life away

Just to pay for a timeshare down in Destin (take me to Florida)

Little did you know

Your home's really only the town you'll get arrested (take me to Florida)

So you pack your life away

Just to wait out the shitstorm back in Texas (take me to)

Florida is one hell of a drug (take me to)

Florida, can I use you up?

Florida is one hell of a drug

Florida, go on, fuck me up

I move through the world with the heartbroken

My longings stay unspoken

And I may never open up the way I did for you

And all of those best laid plans

You said I needed a brave man

Then proceeded to play him

Until I believed it too

And it kills me

I just don't understand

How you don't miss me

In the shower

And remember

How my rain-soaked body was shaking

Do you hate me?

Was it hazing?

For a cruel fraternity I pledged

And I still mean it

Old habits die SCREAMINGGGGG

Six weeks of breathing clean air

I still miss the smoke

Were you making fun of me with some esoteric joke?

Now I want to sell my house and set fire to all my clothes

And hire a priest to come and exorcise my demons

Even if I die screaming

And I hope you hear it

And I hope it's shitty

In The Black Dog

When someone plays The Starting Line and you jump up

But she's too young to know this song

That was intertwined in the tragic fabric of our dreaming

'Cause tail between your legs, you're leaving

I still can't believe it

'Cause old habits die SCREAMINGGGGGGGG

#ask #isabel tag

[sssuuri]

If I remember right, you said you worked in PR before? What is your take on the last few days and Armie?

Hi dear Nonny!

I see that Armie's PR team is trying different strategies as his situation is not an average one. And I'm glad to see The Sun article and I hope more like this will come. We, as Armie's fans, know that he is an amazing person, he is innocent and the scandal was orchestrated. But general public, in majority, believes headlines of tabloids. That's why it's important to replace old articles, that connect Armie to the scandal, with new ones, that will remind people that Armie is a talented actor and is innocent, as no charges were pressed against him. As for "timeshare selling" I have several theories and I think we'll have a better understanding over time. But anyway, any honest labor deserves respect. Remember how Armie helped Ashton in construction works and I admired him for doing it. I always remember that this person has gone through a horrendous scandal, and I appreciate any positive shift, even a small one. My heart is with him.

Thank you for your ask ❤

[artificialqueens]

🏳️‍🌈 It's Chocolate (Platonic Adore Delano x Jinkx Monsoon) - Angle

Adore knew there were only two options: She makes a phone call or she pours that whiskey down her throat. She threw the nip as hard as she could across the apartment, and then she dialed the first and only number that came to mind. 

“I’m not interested in buying any timeshares,” Jinkx’s voice came through the phone. “But if you’re selling something else, I’d consider it.”

***************

Adore had a shitty day. A really, really shitty day, and all she wanted was some chocolate. She was debating whether it was worth leaving the house when she remembered that she had shoved some fancy chocolate bar to the back of her cabinet.

She cursed under her breath as she needed to take nearly everything out of the cabinet to find it, but it was on her mind and she couldn’t let it go now. 

Adore finally found the bar and eagerly grabbed it, going to open it with no intention of putting everything else back. She froze as she went to close the cabinet, a tiny bottle catching her eye.

Apparently, when she and Bianca went through the entire apartment disposing of any alcohol that may have been stowed away in random places, this nip of whiskey managed to hide itself in the corner of a cabinet full of miscellaneous food items she barely touched. 

Adore just stared at it for a moment, her brain not doing much of anything; and then it started doing everything. Suddenly, some chocolate that was going to barely scratch the surface of this shitty, shitty day, was competing with an option that was much more effective, appealing, and dangerous.

She has been around plenty of alcohol over the past 5 months - she performed in bars and clubs all the time - and most of the time she was fine. She sipped on sparkling water while her friends drank wine and cocktails, and assured them it was fine. Which it was, most of the time.

But again, this was a shitty, shitty day. And she wasn’t out performing, or spending time with her supportive friends that held her accountable. It was just Adore and the whiskey taunting her from the cabinet.

Without a second thought, her arm shot out and she grabbed the whiskey, her heart rate picking up as her mind ran in circles. She could feel better right now, she could numb these feelings and forget about it all. But she had been sober for 5 months, and her mind hadn't gone straight to alcohol until it was in front of her face… and that was progress, right?

Adore knew in that moment that there were only two options: she makes a phone call or pours that whiskey down her throat. She squeezed her eyes shut and threw the nip as hard as she could across the apartment, and then she dialed the first and only number that came to mind. 

She paced desperately in circles, willing with everything in her for her call to be answered. She was just about to hang up in defeat when she heard a cheerful greeting.

“I’m not interested in buying any timeshares,” Jinkx’s voice came through the phone. “But if you’re selling something else, I’d consider it.”

Adore actually managed a small smile and she knew she made the right choice.

“I don’t think you can afford what I’m selling,” Adore shot back. 

“Well my $200,000 might disagree. What was your All Stars crown worth?”

“My sanity? Bitch I watched you lose your whole mind over a dress!”  

“I don’t seem to remember you sewing!”

“Okay fine, so we both suck,” Adore conceded. 

Adore paused, despite knowing exactly what she wanted to say when she picked up the phone, the words suddenly left her.

“I assume you’re not calling to sell time shares or argue about sewing, so what’s up?” Jinkx asked curiously.

“I found some whiskey in my apartment,” Adore said simply, letting the words sit, knowing that was all the information Jinkx would need. They had many conversations about alcohol and Jinkx was one of the people that really encouraged her sobriety in the first place. Just saying it out loud led to a tiny sense of relief, some tension leaving her body. 

“I’m glad you called,” Jinkx said sincerely, all hints of sarcasm or banter suddenly out the window. “Did you drink it?”

“No. But I almost did,” Adore responded honestly. 

“But you didn’t. That’s a win, Adore.”

“But I really, really wanted to. I still want to.”

Adore began pacing again, that feeling of restlessness creeping back up. 

“Where’s the whiskey now?” Jinkx asked without a hint of judgment in her voice, which Adore couldn’t appreciate more.

“I threw it across my apartment."

"Dump it," Jinkx said simply. "I'll stay on the phone with you."

Adore took a deep breath and went off to collect the nip that had ended up in the corner of the living room.

"This is fucking stupid," Adore groaned, frustrated with the situation as much as herself.

"It is," Jinkx said simply. "But so is breaking your hand punching concrete and threatening to fight guys twice your size on live TV." 

"Bitch that was once!" Adore insisted as she collected the bottle.

"Is that really better?"

"Once is better than twice!"

"None is better than once."

"I can't think of anything specifically dumb you did, but I'm sure there was plenty."

"And that's why I stopped drinking bitch," Jinkx shot back. "Did you dump it yet?"

Adore looked down at the whisky, which she had in fact been holding without moving any closer to the sink. Part of her was really regretting calling Jinkx, now that it was right in front of her.

"You called me because you don't want to drink," Jinkx offered as if reading her mind.

"You really are a witch," Adore responded without explaining.

"I am," Jinkx agreed, "but I also understand what's going through your mind right now."

Adore sighed and closed her eyes before unscrewing the top. She smelled it and without giving herself another moment to think she watched it slide down the drain.

"Okay, it's gone," Adore said, feeling a pressure in her chest release that she hadn't quite realized was there.

"Good for you!" Jinkx said enthusiastically. "Now you just have to do that every day for the rest of your life."

Adore laughed and threw the bottle into the trash, covering it with some paper towels.

"Don't fucking remind me."

"You can call me anytime though. Seriously."

Adore felt the warmth and support as she picked up the chocolate bar and took a huge bite.

Pride Challenge Points: 540

#rpdr fanfiction #adore delano #jinkx monsoon #jadore #platonic jadore #hurt/comfort #angle #tw addiction #tw alcoholism #fic challenge

[haunted-radishes]

Current character song obsession: Sandcastle Kingdoms by NateWantsToBattle for Xie Lian's past

What can I make? What can I sell? A timeshare in heaven that's just out of hell. Am I a fraud, or a genuine scam? Am I a monster, or worse, just a man?

But in the end we're all the same, to the grave only take our names, there's an ocean made of dreams, but the current strands you out at sea

I wake up to find the passing of time made my mirror show someone I don't know. Now with my own hands, build castles of sand, but all kingdoms drown as tides bring them down

My army has fallen, ambitions have burned, the subjects stay loyal, but don't wait their turn. Now blindly they follow their king to the fray, but he has no action, and they have no say

But in the end we're bound to change, we're made for more than all of these numbers and names. We could all go down in flames, or put it out, relinquish these words from my mouth

I wake up to find the passing of time made my mirror show sometime I don't know. Now with my own hands, build castles from sand, but all kingdoms drown as tides bring them down

The sirens they sing laments just for me, I fall to my knees and beg for release. When my kingdom comes, my will be undone, my world then decides where to hang my hide.

In the end we're bound to change (bound to change). We could all go down in flames

Maybe one day you'll find humanity, until then don't you dare say that we are the same

#tgcf #xie lian #character song

[endreal]

And to be clear his name isn't Panopticon because he sits on the crown moulding overlooking the most private and sensitive corner of the bathroom and just watches. Panopticon is a family name (he's a member of the Piedmont Panopticon lineage, so-called for successfully running a scam in which they made a small fortune selling vacation timeshares for kitchen counters as a means to improve spidery health and wellness, and by the time the law caught wise of this scam they had moved from the Piedmont region of France to the Appalachian piedmont and started a new, humbler life where extradition and various songbirds couldn't get them. Many generations later, my buddy was born.).

[superstorequotes]

Glenn: “Is it true we sell the morning-after pill?”

Tate: “We definitely have the morning-after pill. Yeah, right over there.”

Glenn: “Oh, wow. So prominent.”

Tate: “Yeah.”

Glenn: “Listen, Tate, I would never ask you to sell something that you were not comfortable with. So, if you want to remove them from the pharmacy I will support you.”

Tate: “I love the morning-after pill. I have to keep a couple boxes at my timeshare in Tampa.”

Glenn: “Tampa?”

Tate: “Oh yeah. Women love it there. You know what I mean? Yeah it’s a sick place. It’s only like 12 miles from the beach.”

Glenn: “Ok but, between us, could you just find a reason to take them off the shelf? You know.. um, maybe say that they’re, like, expired?”

Tate: “That would be a lie.”

Glenn: “Tate, do you believe in God?”

Tate: “Yeah, I think there’s a God.”

Glenn: “Yeah?”

Tate: “But I think he lives in nature. You know, the rocks and the trees and crap like that. Honestly, I think God could be a frog.”

Glenn: “Oh, brother.”

Superstore, S2E4 “Guns, Pills and Birds”

#nbc superstore #superstore #quote #glenn sturgis #tate superstore #cloud 9 #rare nice tate moment

[agentnico]

Hello Tomorrow! - Season 1 (2023) Review

Feels like a missed opportunity that this show didn’t once make use of the hit pop song Reach (For the Stars) by staple band S Club 7. Yes, this show is set in a retro 60s, but S Club 7 is fitting for any era of time!!

Plot: In a retro-futuristic world, charismatic salesman Jack Billings leads a team of fellow sales associates determined to revitalize their customers' lives by hawking timeshares on the moon.

Recently I have been trying to validate my Apple TV+ subscription, as in the current day and age where there are a gazillion various streaming services, one has to question which ones are worth the monthly buck. In regards to Apple TV+, the main reason I had the subscription in the first place was due to getting the first year for free with my purchase of the iPhone 11 back in 2020, however that one free year has long gone, and the only main reason having it now is seeing a moustachioed Jason Sudeikis inspire and charm us all in the amazing Ted Lasso series. Speaking of which, my fiancée has just bought me a Ted Lasso Build-a-Bear and I am sorry but I must state that this thing is cute as fudge! It has no right to be this adorable! My sweet Teddy Lasso! Anyway, aside from that, Apple TV+... What is it good for? That’s what I’m discovering, hence why I recently watched the Shrinking show and the Tetris movie. All enjoyable in their own right and feel free to browse my reviews on those earlier on this blog. Yep, that was some shameless self-marketing, and I could not care less. As for my next Apple venture, I have just finished watching Hello Tomorrow!, the season finale of which has just aired, and naturally here I am, your humble servant, talking about my thoughts on the project at hand.

Hello Tomorrow! brings us a retro futuristic world of the 1960s that has been upgraded with very helpful robots that for once aren’t trying to take over the world like in the recent Atomic Heart video game, but instead are only in the background, and more so this is a show about hope and opportunity and dreams. Or at least the single idea of this, as what we have is actually a bunch of con-artists trying to sell to a bunch of gullible simpletons the dream of living in a luxury residence on the moon. Not that I personally see anything appealing about living on the moon, as the grey desert landscape seem to be pretty dull of a locale to look at when walking out of your bedroom onto the balcony, yet these folks seem intent on wanting to go there. Each to their own I guess. Then again this does seem like yet another interpretation on the fabled American Dream - the idea all poor and desperate do their best to strive to, but in turn never reach. In a nutshell we have ourselves a sci-fi critique of capitalism wrapped in a tailored 60s suit. Does it work? Not always. At 10 episodes long, the show does fall into a sense of repetition where we discover early on that the entire idea of living on the moon is all a con, so the show then lingers with the whole ‘will they/won’t they get caught’ case, but without much resolution until the final episode that does offer a multitude of cliff-hangers, evidently in hope of another season renewal. However judging at how Hello Tomorrow! isn’t present on Apple TV+’s Top 10 charts I’m sensing said renewal is very questionable.

The cast are all superb and what make the show so watchable. Billy Crudup’s Jack is simply dripping with pools of charisma and charm as the main salesman and the brains behind the operation. With his wide smile and dapper suits, Crudup is totally believable as a businessman who would totally get folks to belief in this unbelievable dream. Yet his colourful sales team is worth a mention too. Haneefah Wood is immensely likeable as the straight headed righthand woman Shirley, and one that would fit right at home in the offices of Glengarry Glen Ross, where Alec Baldwin would proclaim proudly those famous sales words: “always be closing!”. Dewshane Williams is the ambitious Herb, who is so idiotic and under his wife’s leash that he may secretly just be a genius. And Hank Azaria rounds up the sales team with his usual offbeat persona. Then there’s Nicholas Podany as Jack’s long lost son who gets corrupted by Jack’s sleazy teachings, and their estranged father-son relationship being at the heart of this show. Jacki Weaver pops up in a couple of episodes too as Jack’s wisecracking mother, and Weaver is always a weirdly energetic presence.

Look, Hello Tomorrow! doesn’t break any new ground. Its yet another show about con-men conning innocent gullible people, only in this case the retro setting adds more flair and style to the proceedings. The entire show honestly rides on Billy Crudup’s charismatic lead performance. He’s a sleazebag from beginning to end, yet he manages to convincingly be devilishly likeable and sympathetic, so much so that he manages to get himself lost in his own lie of this ridiculous dream. His Cheshire cat-like grin brings out the ‘character you love to hate’ type, yet one you’re happy to go on this journey with. Jack is a liar and a cheat, but he’s also a dreamer. And in a show that’s all about reaching for the stars, that’s all too relatable.

Overall score: 6/10

#hello tomorrow! #billy crudup #apple tv+ #Apple TV #apple #streaming #hello tomorrow #comedy #drama #hank azaria #allison pill #jacki weaver #nicholas podany #haneefah wood #matthew maher #science fiction #retro #amit bhalla #lucas jansen #dewshane williams #tv show #tv series #2023 #2023 in tv #reach s club 7 #hello tomorrow review #hello tomorrow! season 1 #dreamer #con men #glengarry glen ross