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#sex education smut
honeybeehimbo · 4 days
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looking for new partners for m/f pairing's where i play the male. discord only. i love angst, smut and a little fluff (not too much fluff or it gets uninteresting for me, sorry!) plots under the read more, but open to other ideas too. some fandom ideas also under, hence the tags. like and i will dm you or dm me directly
best friend's older sister
muse a is a vampire/demon hunter, muse b is a monster with a soul/conscious. 
summer best friends
emergency contact
older muses reunite
something based off this, cue all the angst
ideas with my own muses
drew (kyle allen fc), a musician, reunites with the girl his songs are all about. can be another artist or someone outside the musician lifestyle.
chase (dylan minette fc), your typical geek boy, is hooking up with the popular girl, who wants to keep it a secret. but chase is catching feelings
rish (rahul kohli fc), er doctor/chief resident, your muse and rish dated in their 20s, but eventually broke up because they never saw each other because of rish's commitment to his work and inability to make time for the relationship. your muse suddenly pops up during the graveyard shift at the er with a twisted ankle (or something else!) rish is the doctor in charge and they catch up and old feelings resurface.
elias (andrew garfield fc), a magnificent fine artist needs a nude model, which is your muse, tensions arise and it's clear that they both want each other. but elias has commitment issues. (this one is really bare bones, but im open to adding details, maybe making it more forbidden, affair? age gap? im open to hearing ideas)
fandom wants
canon x canon only! i will not do canon x oc
marvel: peter parker (andrew garfield or tom holland) against any other female marvel character from any "universe"
glee: finn hudson against any female glee character, might also be willing to do crossover with other shows in the same realm.
ER: i will play pretty much any of the guys from the show er against any of the female ones.
one tree hill: jake/peyton, brooke/lucas, rachel/any male, mia/any male, alex/any male, i will not do any of the canon pairings that actually end up together, since i feel like that story has already been told.
sex education: any girl/otis
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nosleepjustlevi · 1 year
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FanFiction Notice <3
Content: Sex education! Mentions of vaginas, penis’s, orgasms, the clitoris, warning of abuse in power dynamics, and sex education resources across a variety of platforms.
Just a few notes for the folks reading all the smutty fanfiction and especially those who don’t have much experience with “smut” in real life!
That’s totally okay! There’s no need to feel badly or embarrassed if you don’t have a lot of sexual experience, everyone moves at their own pace :)
Similarly, it’s okay if you haven’t experienced the kind of intimacy that’s portrayed in fanfiction (most of us haven’t, that’s why we write about it lol)
Consent is sexy! There are multiple ways to incorporate ‘dirty talk’ that includes asking for consent and checking in with your partner. “Does that feel good baby?” “Is it okay if I touch right here?” “Would you like it if I did x, y, z?” “You like it when I do that?” “Tell me what you want me to do, I want to make you feel good” etc etc etc!
A lot of fanfiction includes people with vagina’s cumming from penetration alone, while this is nice to think about of course, it rarely happens in real life. The large majority of people with vaginas cannot and will not come from dick penetration alone (around 80% of people with vaginas cannot do this). This is because of the nature of the shape of the penis and the shape of the vagina. While everyone’s genitals are unique, the overall shape means that a penis will likely not meet the angle required to hit your g-spot. Now, there is such a thing as extended orgasms (and you may experience this from dick penetration alone), but the big firework sudden rush of orgasm we usually think about probably won’t happen from just a penis inside you. And that’s normal! Don’t feel like you’re missing out!
It is much more likely to cum from finger penetration. This is because of the way fingers can curve to reach the g-spot. Also, clitoral stimulation is often key to an orgasm.
Some fanfiction references the penis hitting the cervix, in real life this is actually usually quite painful (at least in my experience and according to my gynecologist). If you have ever had sex and felt a sudden pang of pain from a thrust, it is likely because the penis has hit your cervix. The cervix and g-spot are not the same. Repeated hitting against the cervix may actually give you a stomach ache after sex.
Sex is awkward sometimes! That’s okay! It can take time to learn what your partner enjoys and also especially learn what you enjoy. If you feel comfortable, it is a good idea and it is fun to experiment with yourself on your own to discover what you like and don’t like.
Cumming inside is nice an all, but condoms are also cool :) They make for easy clean up and significantly reduce the risk of pregnancy and STDs!
In fanfiction, there is often this theme of partners being able to just kind of read each others minds and provide the other with mind blowing sex and orgasm without even needing to communicate about it. This may be true if you have had sex with a partner many times, but the journey to this level of intimacy is communication and may be awkward sometimes, that’s normal!
Power dynamics portrayed in fanfiction may not be appropriate in real life. If a superior is eliciting sexual acts from you it may very well be abuse and you should notify a trusted adult.
Some educational resources I suggest to understand and learn about sexual intimacy and figure out how you can receive pleasure, give pleasure, and overall where you stand within this nuanced world of sexuality, pleasure, and orgasms: the book Come as You Are by Emily Nagoski, the Netflix educational documentary series Sex, Explained narrated by Janelle Monae, @itsmillyevans on Instagram (highly highly recommend her!!), and plannedparenthood.org has a ton of educational resources (they do not just cater towards abortion, they are a great sexual health resource)
Sex Education Matters!
Spread the word folks!
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bultaoreunheyyy · 19 days
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lmaoooo can you believe I lived 30 years of life, with the *INTERESTS* that I have and the fanfiction that I write, without knowing about the existence of nose filters???!!!
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unluckyhoneybee · 2 years
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Sex Education: A couple of questions.
Part 3: Lando remembers something you said and feels curious. It's also time for rules. Smut.
MASTERLIST
Previous part: Practical Lessons
Warnings: +18. toys.
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I was laying on my bed. George was next to me talking to his girlfriend on face time. A week had passed since whatever happened between Lando and me and I was still not over it. Not in an, I'm in love with him, but more in an I fucking touched Lando Norris way.
It still wandered around my mind how we had ended up like that. He was one of those persons who I never expected to do that kind of stuff with. We knew each other for a long time. We had always been friends and it was kind of weird.
He had stayed for a while, I don't know how much because I fell asleep halfway. But I had waken up comfortably lying in the bed, covered in the sheets and hugging tightly a pillow. On the nightstand, I found a little piece of paper.
Thank you for the advice, see you next week.
I still remember how he said he could give me a couple of more lessons. That meant that he wanted more, right? And why the fuck was I so eager for it?
"Hey, what did you want to talk about?" George said snapping me from my thoughts.
"Finally..."
"It was my girlfriend. You are just jealous because you are single and haven't gotten laid in months"
I showed him my middle finger and he laughed.
"Tell me, what have you frowning so much"
I took a deep breath. I wouldn't tell him what happened because he was really close to Lando too. But I needed a friend to let this out.
"Okey. Something happened the other day"
George gasped and turned his body toward me.
"What happened?"
"It's... Something with a guy"
"You fucked someone?"
"Not... Like fuck fuck." I scratched my forehead. "We touched ourselves"
"Ooooh wow."
I rolled my eyes.
"Who is him? Do I know him?"
Yes, he's one of your best friends.
"No, I don't think so"
"So... Do you like him?"
"No"
"But... He is from home or... Your team? Another team? The media?"
I sighed.
"I can't tell you"
"Is he another driver?"
"No!" I fucking lied into his face. To my best friend. I couldn't just let him know. And I also had promised Lando to keep it safe, right?
"OK. Ok. And what worries you?"
"I never expected this to happen with him and I think he wants to repeat it, or even go further."
"And you don't want to? Did he do something you..."
"No! The thing is that I really liked it. But it feels weird to do it with him"
"And... Why don't you tell him? If he really wants to do something again?"
"Should I?"
"Yes?"
I sighed. Maybe he was right.
"Okey, I will think about it".
Lando Norris: Hey, something came to my mind the other day.
Lando Norris: Do you mind if I ask a couple of questions?
I looked at the screen for a long time.
Me: About what?
Lando Norris: Can we meet?
I looked around, suddenly worried about someone seeing the conversation.
He wanted to meet like last week? Was he going to just ask questions? What were those questions even about? Sex? Did he still have doubts?
Okay, YN. Stop. You are overthinking.
Me: okay.
Me: When?
Me: And where?
I saw the bubbles popping as a signal of him writing another message. I bit my lip waiting for it.
Lando Norris: Can I go to your room?
Me: Yes.
Was it even a good idea? I asked myself where all my confidence was. How had I been able to let him in my room, let him touch me, and even ask for him to let me touch him?
What the fuck was going on with me?
Lando Norris: I'll be there soon.
I felt a rush over my body. Soon. I needed to clean everything. And by everything I meant myself. I ran to the shower and made sure to be presentable for him. What am I doing?
Maybe he just wanted to talk about qualy. Or tomorrow's race. Or something completely different. I was sure I was overreacting.
I heard a knock on the door just when I was putting some shorts on. I opened it as fast as I could.
"Hey"
"Hey"
He was wearing a black hoodie and jeans. He looked good, and just as last week, he was blushing hard. We looked at each other for long seconds.
"Can I come in?"
"Yeah, of course"
I moved aside so he could come in and then locked the door. He had put his hands in his pockets and was looking at me.
Fuck. I had spent the whole week trying to take him out of my head, to not think about the noises he made when I touched him or how good his fingers felt inside me. For what? For nothing. I had a ting feeling between my legs and my underwear was probably already getting wet.
"What did you want to talk about?" I asked fidgeting with my fingers.
"Can we sit?"
I nodded and followed him to the sofa in the main suite room.
"Good" He said letting himself fall into the cushions.
I sat down with my legs crossed in front of me.
"Well"
"Well"
He looked at me for a couple of seconds and then at his hands again. Was he going to tell me he had some kind of ITS?
"What happened the other day" he said and looked at me.
We can't ever repeat it again.
"Yes?"
"I want to ask if you are comfortable with the idea"
I furrowed my eyebrows.
"With what we did? Yes."
He took a deep breath and looked at me. There's when I got scared.
"Listen. You can kick me out or punch me or never speak to me again"
He was getting on my nerves. Why the fuck couldn't he go straight for it.
"Lando! Just speak already" I said slapping his arm.
"Ok, ok. Would you be keen on the idea of getting a few more lessons? Like together?"
I gasped. This was exactly what I wanted to avoid. Mainly because I wanted more but it still felt weird.
"I think we are quite compatible and... I think we should keep learning together"
"Compatible?"
"Yeah, I once slept with this girl who laughed at me when I tried to suck her nipple"
I laughed a bit but covered my mouth.
"Sorry. She is an idiot. You don't laugh at people for making mistakes. You help them learn" I said trying to be serious again.
"See? That's what I mean. The first thing you told me was that I was safe"
Oh.
"I felt safe with you and I think that as I'm single and so are you we could use this as an opportunity to get some practice"
I let a ragged breath out.
"Practice? Do you want to have sex with me... For practice?"
He looked at me in panic.
"You can kick me out, I told you" He said with a trembling voice.
"I'm not going to kick you out, idiot"
Lando was probably the cutest guy in the whole world.
"I'm glad you felt safe with me, I felt safe with you too"
"But..." He said turning his face to me and looking really worried.
"Don't you think it's weird?"
He took a deep breath and gently took my hand between his, fidgeting with my fingers.
"Weird?"
"Yes. We have known each other for so long and... Having sex for the sake of learning?"
"Everybody?"
"You have never had sex with a man before, I see"
He looked down at our hands and blushed to say no with his head.
"Right, they are the most selfish shit in the whole world. Like if everything turned around their dick. And they don't even care to make you cum"
"Well, I don't want to be like that." He muttered. "I want to learn how to make a woman feel good"
He looked into my eyes when he said that, taking my breath away for a second.
I moved my thumb over his and thought about it. I didn't have much to lose, right? He was so cute and hot at the same time. I trusted him and we knew each other for a long time. Plus, he had already shown me how good at learning he was. It was a win-win situation for both of us. We would gain both experience and a good time.
"Ok, but we need rules"
He looked up at me and his eyes lighted.
"Yes. I can do that. Rules"
I got up and took a notebook and a pen from my bag. Then, I sat back next to him, shoulder to shoulder.
"Rule one. Always protection. And maybe we should get checked. I trust you and all of that, but we should make sure we are both safe" I said and he nodded in agreement. "Rule two..."
"Keep it secret. The second rule of the Sex Ed club is not to talk about the Sex Ed club"
I snorted at the stupid reference and I wrote it in the notebook.
"Rule three. We always talk about it first. We document ourselves and then... If it's needed, we practice. " He nodded again.
"Rule four, always make the other cum"
"Isn't it obvious" "Just write it." "And if the lesson is about sucking dick? My pleasure is not involved in that"
"I'm sure we can demonstrate that is not true. But what I mean is that, if you are learning how to suck a dick, you have to make me cum."
"Oh, right."
I looked at the small list. It wasn't much. "Do you have anything else?"
"Aftercare is an obligation. You don't make me cum and then leave, that's rude. And if it becomes too much or any of us gets uncomfortable, we stop. No matter what."
"That's rude, you are right." I said smiling. I was starting to have fun.
We looked at each other.
"So... Six rules." I reach my hand to him. "Treat?" "Treat".
He gave me a handshake and smiled.
I let the notebook aside and turned my body to his. I remember he said he had a couple of questions.
"So, what was the other question?"
He blushed again and I laughed because of how shy he suddenly was.
"Don't laugh"
"You are cute." I pinched his cheek and he laughed.
"I... remembered something you said"
"Mhm."
"You said that you almost fainted once using a toy. And I have never used a toy on anyone... to myself. And I have been reading a couple of things here and there and they always say that it's like super healthy for a relationship to use toys. And that a lot of people need to use toys to cum."
I nodded slowly.
"You want to see them? Have you ever seen one?"
He slowly said no with his head.
"I have two here with them"
I got up and went to my luggage and pulled the toys out. When I came back from the bedroom, he was sitting on the sofa, looking at his hands and breathing heavily.
"Lando? Are you okay?"
"Just nervous. I'll be fine"
I sat next to him and let both toys fall on his lap. A vibrating wand and a simple glass dildo. He let a ragged breath out.
"First of all, it's okay, Lando. It's just me. You don't need to be nervous, take your time." I leaned and kissed his cheek softly, feeling my heartbeat get faster. "Second, they are clean"
He smiled a bit. "Thank you" He whispered.
I saw how, very slowly, he took the vibrator in his hands and went immediately to turn it on. "Oh fuck!"
I laughed hard. "Yeah, oh fuck. That's the highest setting. You can lower it." I covered his hand with mine and showed him how the buttons worked. "My favourite is the sixth. If it's lower, it won't be enough, and if it's higher, it hurts."
He slowly nodded. "I suppose that it depends on the person, right?"
"Yes."
"How does it work?"
"You just...Well, you have to put it wherever you want and maybe move it a bit."
"Circles?"
I smiled. He remembered.
"On the clit, yes"
"And can you put this...inside?" He said lowering his voice.
"On a good day, yes. With some lube, obviously" "I may have to buy tons of lube for these lessons"
We both laughed and looked at each other.
"And this one?" He said taking the dildo.
"Well, you have to do all the job with that one. But I usually use them together, I can't barely cum only by penetration"
He smiled a bit. "Like if it was my dick?"
"Exactly."
"Sounds easy"
"It's easier than you think."
I saw him swallowing and knew instantly what he would ask. I felt a rush of heat running all over me.
"Can we..." "Yes"
I sounded desperate. I was.
"Well. Em... How?" He said nervously.
"Just... I'll take this off"
I pulled my trousers and let them fall on the side. I chuckled a bit watching his face.
"You have really beautiful legs, YN"
"Well, thank you, Lando."
He smiled.
"Lube?"
"Yeah, wait"
I went fast to the bedroom and when I came back he had taken his hoodie and shoes off.
"I need to be comfortable, YN" "I didn't say a word, Norris"
I sat back on the couch and looked at him.
"Do I get on the floor or..."
"I don't know. I haven't done this before"
He looked at me with furrowed eyebrows.
He jumped to the floor and knelt in front of me. I gasped when his hands came to rest on my knees.
"Okey, deep breaths, YN"
We both took a breath, relaxing in our positions. I got more comfortable in the cushions.
"Ready? Do we need foreplay?"
"I'm ready and... I always use the wand for that. When I'm alone. Never go directly to it, on anything, take your time. Go slow, build it up."
He nodded.
Unexpectedly, Lando leaned and kissed my knee softly without taking his eyes from mine. Oh shit.
"Open your legs for me, YN" He said slowly pushing them.
I obeyed feeling a ticklish feeling between my legs.
"Nice panties" He said laughing a bit.
"Don't laugh, idiot"
"Patrick Star?"
"I said..." I stopped when I felt the soft vibration on my groin. "Oh..."
"Good?"
I nodded and bit my finger, observing how concentrated he was looking at the toy and moving it around my underwear's edge.
"Lando?"
"Yes?"
"I need more" I pleaded.
He smirked. That little shit...
"I will give it to you, but only because we are here for educational purposes."
"I would slap you right now, Norris"
"We will leave that for another time, baby"
After saying that, and without giving me time to respond, he pressed the wand on my centre. I was still wearing my underwear and the setting was low, but it made me moan softly and close my eyes.
I felt his lips on my knee again.
He was doing as I had told him, moving the wand in little circles.
"Oh shit." I could feel my panties already dampening. It felt really good.
"You good? Do you want more?"
I opened my eyes.
"Yes."
"Let me take this off."
I swallowed hard and watch his big hands slowly pulling my underwear down my legs. He was blushing and so was I.
Lando throw the Patrick Star panties away and looked into my eyes. "You can stop me now."
I opened my mouth to speak, but words wouldn't come. I was horny. My skin was burning, my cheeks were flushed and I had that anticipation feeling on my core. But I was also nervous because Lando was about to see my most private part. And there was no coming back from that. But I had already seen his. I had even put it in my mouth.
"YN? Are you there?"
"I'm nervous"
"It's okay. It's just me."
I sighed softly.
He leaned as he separated my legs, finding his place between them and capturing my lips in soft kiss. I moaned at the contact. He always tested good. And he definetly knew how to kiss.
I was so inmersed on the kiss that I almost forget about the vibrations going up my thigh.
"We need a safe word" He said to my lips and looking into my eyes.
"Pinapple?"
"Perfect, and two taps if we can't speak"
I nodded and cupped his face, giving him another kiss, interrupted by the wand firmly pressed to my centre.
"Ohhh... Shit"
He had changed the setting and I haven't noticed. It was higher now.
He sat on his heels and looked down.
"You are beautiful, YN" He whispered more for himself than for you to hear it, not knowing the impact that those words had on you.
From the two times you had been in this position with Lando, you had learned that he was all praising. He only had good words for you. And fuck. You loved it.
"How is it?"
"Good. Good. Press it on the clit, is where it feels the better"
He obeyed and laughed at my reaction. My legs closed without warning around his hand.
"You are so sensitive..." He said.
I nodded and bit my lip. The vibrations were sending waves of pleasure all over my body. I wouldn't last long.
"Shit, Lando."
I felt once again his lips on my thigh.
He was moving the vibrator in circles over my clit, driving me mad.
"Can I use the dildo?"
"Y... Yes"
He stopped the wand and left it on my belly as he turned around to take the lube and the dildo. I whined at the lack of stimulation out of a sudden. The cheeky bastard laughed a bit and I slapped his arm.
"Hey!"
"You deserve it"
"I could have kept the vibrator in place!"
"I want to make you cum" He said as if was the most obvious thing.
I opened my mouth to speak but he cut me.
"How much lube is too much lube?"
I laughed watching him with the bottle and the toy.
"That's enough, Lando."
"Ok Missy. Are you ready?"
It's not the only time he calls me that. I thought.
"Of course I am"
I went back to my previous position and waited patiently. He looked into my eyes and then to my centre. Unexpectedly, he took his fingers there, collecting the wetness dripping from the previous stimulation.
I bit my lip and groaned when he easily slid one of his fingers inside of me. And then another. They felt so good. Just like I had told him, Lando moved his fingers slowly. My legs shook a bit when he hit my g-spot.
And once again, he stopped. I grunted.
"Lando, you need to stop doing that. Is frustrating"
He smiled.
"I like it"
I crocked my eyebrow.
"Edging?"
"Yeah. Now. Ready?"
I felt the dildo on my entrance and nodded. Fuck. Pushed it slowly, watching how the toy disappeared in me with an amused look in his eyes.
"Oh fuck" I moaned when he bottomed.
He pulled then a bit and the stretching made me squirm. I tried to grab into the sofa.
"Give me the vibrator" He said.
I whined knowing exactly what was coming. I passed him the wand and he turned it on.
"Six?" He waited for me to nod. "Ok. And I use it just as before?"
While asking those questions, he hadn't stopped moving the dildo in and out.
"Y... Yes" I moaned.
"Oh shit, you are too much" He groaned.
Lando pressed the vibrator on my clit and I couldn't contain a high pitched moan. I covered my mouth as fast as I could and he laughed.
"That good?" "So fucking good"
He had almost dominated the use of the purple wand, but he was a bit clumsy with the dildo.
The hoodie I was wearing was starting to be too warm, so I pulled it and threw it away, making him laugh.
"Overheating"
I nodded.
"How am I doing?"
"Good, good... Just..."
I took his hand and halt his movements on the dildo for a moment.
"Do you remember what I told you about the g-spot?"
"On the front wall"
I was getting more and more sensitive with every second the vibrator stayed against my clit.
"T... Tilt it a bit"
"Like this?"
He did it perfectly.
"Yes. Shit. You are good, Lando" I said closing my eyes and covering my mouth. I really hoped that Pierre, who was in the next room, couldn't hear anything.
The combination of the dildo against my most sensitive part and the wand on my clit drove me absolutely crazy. I was whining and squirming on the couch, unable to form a sentence or even look at the guy who was making me feel like this.
I was truly a mess and this was a fucking good idea.
"I'm gonna cum, Lando" I said softly.
"Ok, let go. You are doing so good" He said, even though I was just sitting here being pleasured.
He turned and moved the dildo faster, easily sliding in and out and making me moan loudly again.
I felt my whole body crumble as the orgasm hit me. I bit my lips and covered my eyes with my hand.
"That's it. Let go, babe"
Lando was leaving small kisses on my thigh.
I had to push his hands away from me when it became too much. I felt tired but in pure bliss. I felt like floating.
Lando got up and disappeared quickly to the bathroom I could hear the water running and the wardrobes opening and closing.
I gave enough time to recover my face and reach for my underwear.
"Stop there, missy"
I looked up at him.
"Let's clean you"
He pushed me a bit and my cheek got warmer.
"I can do it" I muttered.
He crocked an eyebrow and looked at me.
"I caused this..." He said with a cheeky smile.
He gently cleaned me, paying attention to his movements and being careful when I told him.
"There you go. Now. Patrick Star." He passed me my underwear and I put it on.
Then Lando got up and kissed my forehead.
Maybe it was all the post-orgasmic hormones, but I had a funny feeling in my stomach and when he came back, I could help but smile.
"A glass of water, we need you hydrated. How are you feeling?"
He gave me the water and sat next to me. I drank it and took a deep breath.
"You are blushy" He pinched my cheek.
"Well, I just had an orgasm. You would be blushy too"
He leaned and kissed my cheek. He was really the sweetest.
"Tell me. How was it?"
"I... It was really good, Lando. You learn super fast" I felt brave enough to caress his cheek.
"Yeah?"
I nodded.
"So..."
"9/10"
"Wow."
I smiled.
We looked at each other.
"Tell me, what do you want to do now?"
"What?"
"Rule 5. Aftercare is an obligation"
I laughed a bit.
"Just... TV?"
"Do you want to order food?"
"That sounds wonderful."
I curled on the sofa and he looked at me, getting closer.
"This is a good idea, right?" Lando asked softly.
"It is."
Next Part: Good with numbers.
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okay since you’re in an angst mood and i’m in a pregnancy mood… i present to you… finding out that you’re pregnant after drunkenly going raw with your boyfriend eddie and when you tell him he doesn’t have a great reaction.
I’m kind of out of the angst mood and in more of a fluff/pregnancy mood so this is perfect
I’d say it was the first time either of them went bare with anyone
And it was just a drunken fuck, like they remember it in the morning but nothing they thought they should be concerned about
Until y/n missed her period… and then she missed it again… and then she took a pregnancy test
I don’t think he would be mad
I think he would be more anxious than anything
“No. You’re not pregnant.” He shakes his head, sliding the pregnancy test back toward her. “Huh?”
“This prank isn’t funny. Are you trying to give me a heart attack?”
“I’m not fucking lying, Eddie.”
He gives her a weird look before grabbing the taste again, trying to examine it to see where it said it was fake or a button he could press so it would go back to being blank
“You’re fucking pregnant?!”
“I’ve been saying that! What the fuck do I do!”
“Well shit… we’ve got to find a crib? It would come out any day.”
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sparkles-and-trash · 7 months
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That Adam and Eric plot from sex education where they have a miscommunication and both except to be the bottom is such a dabihawks thing my god I have to write it someday
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bittersweetbark · 7 months
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meta - not the evil Meta - smut writing credentials
We're slowly approaching November (it's September) and that means I'll soon have been writing fanfic for a whole year.
You might have expected a "for 30 years" or something similar, as I'm indeed veray olde (47) but I actually only started to write last year. Before then I had occasionally started on something but that always stayed in my notes because unfortunately I "knew" that "I can't write" because my mother had told me so repeatedly when I was a child; repeatedly until I stopped writing.
Oh shit, this was going to be a quick write-up about the personal vantage point of experience I have for writing anal sex and now it sounds like I'm about to drop my autobiography.
So – I don't think we have to list a sex CV in order to write smut. But I'm recognising the funny divide between modern sex education sources on the internet and my pre-internet experiences.
To be honest: with the modern sex edu stuff as background I often feel that I write my pseudo-renaissance-era smut wrong when I just stick character a into character b without applying enemas and a few days of wearing larger and larger butt plugs. And sure, if I personally pursued sexual relations at this time I would be doing that. (I am still avoiding people in order to keep my mother alive and not infect her with Corona, so. I'm not doing it in the flesh at the moment because a potential sex partner would surely insist on doing dangerous things like "breathe" and I can't have that.)
But as it happens when I came of age it was the 90s aka the last years of the Middle Ages. No internet. Sex education was learning how beby is formed and gametes and stuff. So as a late teen you got all your information from the Cosmopolitan.
And Cosmo didn't actually educate, of course, it just went "SEX TIPS!" and then hinted at the exciting possibilities of what you could do with peppermint drops or poking your finger into someone's arse.
So we did that! And you can do that. I'm not saying you should. But one finger and no lube works and my first boyfriend (I don't know where HE got his education from, it wasn't Cosmo) used beer as lube - and that worked, too.
Again, I'm not saying "we did that and it didn't harm me" - I mean it didn't, but it could have. We just didn't know better. But it wasn't a disaster. There wasn't even shit involved, even though all we ever used to clean up was a wet flannel.
Just wanted to have this written up in case I ever get any "how unrealistic and dangerous" flak, so I can quietly point at it. People have been doing the nasty before you were born and knew better. I hope future generations will still have access to better information and the enshittification of the internet will not lead back to finding creative uses for beer.
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