#should probably link this in the rats about page

[bluebudgie]

Snatching this character ask game to answer it in its entirety bc I'm currently sick in bed and this sounds like good distraction.

Here's your chance to read some lab rat character snippets.

Answering for Lahpp bc the brainworms got me bad the last 2 years.

A. What nicknames do they get called?

None, really. Unless employee numbers count as nicknames. I've made a joking comment about how Petthri would start calling him Gecko for absolutely no logical reason other than me being amused that the man's voice claim actor played a character with that name in a super niche musical. This isn't canon. But it makes listening to relevant songs funny.

B. Describe their family dynamic.

Non-existant. Didn't even have an official legal guardian until Rata Sum authorities required related paperwork for school stuff. There was the subkrewe that handled surveillance of his 'progress' and the head of the project was sort of 'in charge' of him but whatever relationship they had was nothing remotely comparable to a family. I think to this day he's got the hardest time wrapping his head around the concept of family relationships, other than of course the purely biological explanation.

C. What’s their weirdest habit or quirk?

Does consuming more coffee than anyone feasibly should count? I'm not even sure this man drinks anything else. Probably, but seriously unsure. Just don't question it, it hasn't killed him yet.

D. What was their high school college experience like?

This is one of those "20k essay; 1000 different amv scenarios" topics. In short: difficult, exhausting, but not as bad as it could have been.

On a social level he always felt like the odd one out and didn't have much contact to the other students, but he was never actively disliked or anything of the sort. Him being generally rather distant and observant probably intimidated a few people, as well as him being Inquest. Group projects went smoothly though, and interactions were superficially friendly. Just comparatively rare.

Work-wise he had to put in so much more effort than many others because of his disabilities, all while trying to be as stealthy as possible about it so noone would notice. He excelled in many challenges, didn't manage to hide all of it however; some things he simply couldn't do. Uncomfortable for him.

He was a really good student overall.

Also as a side anecdote, he got the typical "can you speak up please" a lot even though he was a front row regular. Soft-spoken guy.

E. What is their love language?

He's the "invite someone to go out for dinner" type. Spend some good quality time. He might get invested in the relevant person's interests too. Ask about them, enable some rambling, or ideally an interesting discussion.

F. How do they handle conflict?

That depends entirely on the kind of coflict and who or what is involved. Can range from "take the lead and try to find the most efficient solution" to "remove himself from the situation and just not deal with it at all".

G. What’s their greatest talent?

Developed mad acting & pokerface skills. He can smile through the most annoying social situations and you wouldn't guess he hates every single second of it. If he actively wants to give you that impression, that is. Sometimes he just doesn't bother.

H. Where is their favourite place to be?

Not sure if he has a consciously picked favourite place but he's comfortable enough in the small studio room connected to his lab. Made it a decently livable place. It's tiny (very tiny) but that's fine, he doesn't need much space. It's a place of peace and quiet, and that's what matters.

I. What makes them feel safe?

Good question! Next question.

J. What is their greatest weakness?

He's a coward who resigned himself to a life in a corrupt, hateful, criminal system. He was target of that very same system's bigotry for ages but he turns a blind eye on it out of fear and a lack of willingness to change anything. He's content being a simple cog in the machine, not caring about what its greater purpose is. is this what Camus calls philosophical suicide

Maybe one day he'll overcome the cowardice to face some difficult truths. Probably not.

K. What is their greatest strength?

If he says he'll get shit done, he gets it done. He's got an incredible amount of perseverance.

Especially in his teenage years this often meant choosing the path of more resistance simply to spite the people who would assume he wouldn't manage certain things. Even if those people would never actually know. He had to at least prove it to himself under the guise of acting out of spite. Is that even a strength anymore or actually a flaw? A strength born from flawed thinking?

L. What is their secrets to happiness?

Don't have anything change, find comfort in living the convenient lie. The illusion of happiness is good enough.

M. How do they handle competition?

If it's the kind of "who wins the monthly nonfatal pool by putting the most life subjects in a vegetative state" small-ego-competition then he simply doesn't care. Not because he has any moral issues with it but because he think it's a waste of time and just distracts from the actual tasks at hand.

If it's "the events in Cantha have put you in a physical and mental state that prevents you from working; and staying away on sick leave for a prolongued amount of time will eventually get you replaced despite decades of dedication" sort of competition then he doesn't handle it well at all. And he doesn't even believe anyone else could do his job better than him. Somehow that actually makes it worse.

N. What are their hidden talents?

Music. Got curious about the general topic in college. And in true spiteful (big fat disclaimer: asshole statement) "Oh you're severely HoH so this is clearly not for you" fashion, he decided this is exactly for him to get invested in. He got really into the theory part especially but also picked up an instrument (undecided which one. the decision has been haunting me for months.) to play.

Later when he met Luqqah they found out it's an interest they have in common so they spent a lot of time just either discussing or analyzing theoretical concepts or actually making some music. Luqqah taught him how to sing over the years! It's something he had wanted to learn well before he met her but very much lacked the confidence to start on his own.

He hasn't lost that passion over all these years, even if he didn't get to share it with anyone in a while. Post-EoD music trio incoming?

O. What motivates them?

In the past: Mostly fear with a good portion of spite.

Now: Mostly habit. Some underlying fears.

P. What advice would they give to their younger self?

If he could look past his own facade he'd likely tell his younger self to keep kindling at least a bit of that spiteful fire he had.

He does sometimes feel like he's lacking more "bite" the older he gets.

Q. Do they have a signature look or fashion?

Always got that eye piece on covering his left eye. You'll not encounter him without it. If you do, something's either wrong or you've somehow invaded into private space.

He spends the majority of his time working which means the majority of the time you'll find him in a labcoat. He also keeps his hair tied up for practical reasons.

His "casual" outfits are still surprisingly formal looking. He wants to leave a decent impression, you know. I'm awful at describing clothes so I'll skip this one until I one day inevitable draw it, but he's big on waistcoats and likes different shades of brown.

R. How tall are they?

Listen friends I'm really bad at understanding the gw2 race heights and putting them in perspective, but I assigned him a confident 98 cm (3'2") which in my world view is somewhere in the average middle. Not super short, not tall.

S. What’s their relationship like with their parents?

Somewhat answered in the family dynamics question. As for his biological parents, he never knew them. His -on paper- legal guardian wasn't much of a parental figure. Did it fuck him up growing up without any real guiding figure to look up to? Sure. Did it take time for him to understand that this is not the normal experience every child has? Unsure if he actually ever fully understood. Rationally he does, but emotionally this is a different matter.

T. What are their favourite foods?

He's really gotten into wasabi.

U. What do they like to do in their spare time?

See the music answer. Also reading an interesting book in a quiet environment is always a good pastime.

V. What’s their biggest pet peeve?

So he's generally really good at keeping his cool but he's got absolutely zero (0) patience for several people talking over each other in the same time. There's a reason he demanded his own lab space when everyone moved over to the CoE.

W. What’s their favourite sport?

If dancing is considered a sport (I believe it is?) Petthri might eventually get him to be interested enough as a spectactor. Let that be a future arc.

Otherwise literally no interest in any at all.

X. What’s their biggest fear?

Death. And I don't mean it in a 'most people find thinking about their own mortality uncomfortable' way, I mean it in a seriously phobic way. It keeps him up at night. He's had numerous seriously bad panic attacks over it. Based important decisions on it.

There was a time of his life it got somewhat better but it's catching up to him again recently.

Y. What physical object do they value most?

Whatever omious instrument I'll decide on that he owns will probably be valuable to him. I have no idea otherwise.

Z. What’s their relationship status?

Officially single (and it will stay that way). Unofficially complicated.

For the really curious: I suppose their current relationship is best described as "friends with benefits". No they have not kissed yet. I'm gonna first have to figure out when and how and why and if at all and

That said I have this shitpost scene-that'll-never-happen in my head of Luqqah meeting Lahpp and Petthri during the whole EoD disaster and in a moment of quiet she and Lahpp sit together. And she looks him in the eyes and goes "So are you two boyfriends?" And before he can even try to defend himself she continues "You break up with me because you figure out you're gay. And then you're gay for that?" Poor Petthri.

#hope u dont mind me stealing this from your blog oz #as far as i understood you wanted to answer it completely too rather than get any asks for it? #should probably link this in the rats about page #budgie plays gw2

[verai-marcel]

Your Hearth Is My Home (BG3 Fanfic, Astarion x Female Reader, Part 19 of ?)

Summary, Notes, Tags, & Part 1 are here.

Act I - Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12

Act II - Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18

AO3 Link is here, darling.

Word Count: 3,707

---------------------------------------

Act II, Chapter 7 - The Gauntlet

Even after he confessed, you realized that Astarion was still, well, Astarion. His feelings, though out in the open, were still a confused mess. If you were to describe it visually, it was a tangled ball of string; most of the strands felt like fondness, while there were a few threads that hummed with anxiety intertwined with lust. As if he felt bad for wanting you in such a way.

Not going to unpack that for now. It’s all too tightly wound together. I’ll let him unravel a bit more before I broach that topic.

On your end, you believed your feelings were pretty straightforward. You cared for him. You enjoyed spending time with him. Just the skinship, touching him, being touched, and sensing that feeling of him enjoying your company, without any ulterior motives, was incredible for you.

You imagined that other couples after confessing their feelings would be flinging their clothes off and having intimate relations in a secluded corner of their own little world.

Instead, you and Astarion were sitting by the campfire, your right arm linked with his left, the two of you reading quietly together.

“Is… is this alright?” he asked tentatively.

You looked up at him and smiled. “Yes, this is perfect.”

He leaned his head against yours. “I feel the same.”

Through your skin contact, however, you felt a slight twinge of guilt from him. Shit, if I say something now, he’s going to start questioning why I always know how he feels…

So you let it go, and just snuggled against him as he continued to read his book.

You had borrowed one of his books just so you could sit like this and spend some quiet time with him. You had few books of your own and you had read through them all at least twice. The book you had borrowed was some kind of adventure novel that featured a drow ranger.

Astarion glanced over at the page you were on. “Oh, you’re coming up to a good part.”

“Hush!” you chided. “No spoilers.”

“You two are being awfully cuddly.”

You both turned around to see Karlach smirking triumphantly.

“You snuck past my alarm on purpose,” you said accusingly.

She grinned. “Of course I did. Otherwise I would have missed this,” she said, pointing at your linked arms.

You could feel Astarion trying to pull away, but you only linked your arms tighter. “So? What of it?”

“Just glad to see you two finally out in the open,” Karlach said. Leaning in, she whispered to the two of you, though it was loud enough for others to hear, “Unlike another couple I know.”

You snorted, and Astarion grinned knowingly.

Looking past Karlach to see the others coming closer, you realized that you probably should do your job. “Alright, guess I’d better get food started.”

***

You were most certainly feeling better. After spending half the day quietly with Astarion, you felt like the pool of magic within you had almost refilled to full. You happily sang the tent cantrips while your rice porridge with herbs and dried mushrooms bubbled in the stew pot.

During the meal, your companions told you about their adventures, about how they met Balthazar, about how they discovered and solved three puzzle rooms, and about how tomorrow they would explore the rest of the lower levels.

“We’ll probably run into the devil down there,” Wyll mused. “We hadn’t seen any signs of it yet.”

“So perhaps all of you should go,” you said. At their shocked looks, you waved off their concern. “My magic has come back, and nothing came by today, not even a rat. Besides, Scratch and Owly can help defend the camp if anything happens.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, yes, I’ll be fine. I’m more worried about what you lot will run into down in the lower levels, given what you’ve told me.”

Lae’zel nodded. “Then I will train you more tonight, so that we may leave you tomorrow without concern.”

Oh boy. I’m going to be sore tonight.

***

You barely had the energy to change into your sleeping clothes. Falling into your bedroll, exhausted from Lae’zel’s training, you closed your eyes and groaned from your sore muscles. My gods. I cannot wait to fall asleep.

The soft footsteps of a certain elf drew your attention. Looking up, you watched Astarion kneel down beside you. 

“Darling, you’re not thinking of staying out here, are you?”

“Too tired to think.”

He sighed dramatically. “But I confessed my heart and soul to you today. You will come to my tent, won’t you?”

Dragging yourself up, you grabbed your bedroll. “Haven’t had enough of my company?”

“Never, darling.”

You grinned as you walked with him to his tent. “Never say never,” you teased.

He held the tent flap open for you like a gentleman, ushering you inside. Laying your bedroll alongside his, you flopped down ungracefully. “Now if you’ll excuse me, Lae’zel put me through a thousand paces, so I need to rest.”

He chuckled as he lay beside you. “Did you sing?”

You blinked. “Oh. No, I forgot.”

“Hmm. Try it next time.”

“Alright. Sweet dreams, Astarion.”

He leaned over and pressed his forehead to yours. 

I’m going to get addicted to this warm fondness I’m feeling from him.

“Did you know that elves don’t usually dream?”

“Oh?”

“Dreams are… chaotic, uncontrollable. Memories are bad enough,” he murmured.

You touched his face, stroking his cheek. “I’m sorry.”

“Why? You’ve only given me good memories so far. Well, except for when you got hurt.” He frowned. “So don’t do that again.”

You smiled. “Alright, I’ll try.”

He sighed. “Good enough, I suppose.” Reaching out for you, he pulled you close. “Sweet dreams, darling.”

You closed your eyes, and inhaled his unique scent, rosemary, bergamot, and a touch of brandy.

***

You awoke, cold and alone. Quickly getting up and changing, you saw that everyone was already getting their things together for the day’s exploration. Walking up to Astarion, you tapped his side with the back of your hand. 

“You didn’t wake me up?”

“You were sleeping so soundly, darling. I’m not a monster.”

You rolled your eyes. 

“Besides, Gale apparently wanted a chance to cook.”

“Shhh!” Gale hissed.

You glanced over at the stew pot. Seeing it mostly empty, you walked over and scraped what was left of the breakfast soup into a small bowl and sipped it. It was a delightful mix of spices and savory flavor, shreds of dried beef jerky mixed with some lentils and beans.

“This is amazing,” you muttered jealously. “Gale, give me the recipe when you come back!”

“What, and divulge my secrets?”

“Just do it,” Shadowheart said with a laugh, slapping him on the arm.

You chugged the rest of the soup and gathered all the dirty items for cleaning later. Just as everyone was ready to go, you headed to the entryway with them to wish them well. Astarion waited for everyone else to go past before he quickly pulled you in for a hug.

“Stay safe,” he murmured into your ear.

“You too,” you replied before the two of you pressed foreheads.

“We don’t have all day!” Karlach yelled gleefully.

Astarion just huffed and left with the rest of them, but not before giving you one last look.

You waved and smiled. Come back safe.

***

It was a long day and a half by yourself. You started counting the hours after you realized a full day had passed. You went up to Withers to check if they were all still alive, and he always nodded solemnly, with no other updates. So you just read books and cleaned and played with Scratch and Owly. You danced and practiced your cantrips for hours at a time. You slept in Astarion’s tent, rolling onto his bedroll and immersing yourself in his scent.

Am I being weird? It’s definitely weird. But… It makes me feel comfortable.

And they still had not returned. It was times like these where you wondered about the possibility of joining them on their adventures.

But then you remembered that you hated pain, and you had nowhere near enough battle experience to survive alongside them without being a hindrance.

Better to stay behind and tend camp. After all, if not me, then who will? Withers? Hah.

Wandering to the edge of the balcony overlooking the statue of Shar and seeing all the water below, you sang a song to coax a stream of water up to your level, filling up a few basins with water. Finding an empty barrel amongst the rubble, you plugged the holes with some clay and filled that up as well. But when you tried to move the barrel filled with water, it barely shifted.

You glared at it.

Move, damn you!

Your song became a chant, the tempo faster and stronger than you normally sang. 

The barrel hopped two feet closer.

Oh?

You continued to chant, almost like a war hymn as you led the barrel away from the edge of the balcony, but after a few hops, you felt drained.

Okay, we’re going to stop there.

You looked through the pile of loot that the companions had dropped off the previous night and found enough rags and scruffy clothes that you could fashion a sort of curtain, hung by some old spear handles that you formed into a three sided divider screen, with the backside open to the view of the balcony. There was space to stand next to the barrel and still be hidden from view.

Well, that’s good enough, I think.

You went back to your pack and grabbed your soap bar and one of the water basins. Singing a hot water rune into existence, you heated the water in the basin, took your clothes off, and scrubbed yourself clean. After rinsing yourself off, you heated the water in the barrel before awkwardly climbing inside.

Damn, I should have made a seat in here.

Instead, you squatted down and let the hot water cover your head. Closing your eyes, you let the heat relax your body for a good ten seconds before you came back up for air. Grabbing the basin and emptying the water out of it, you pushed it under you and sat on it precariously, slowly leaning back until you felt balanced.

You let out a sigh of relief. It worked. Now you had a nice hot bath in the privacy of a little makeshift divider screen, and the others could take some time to relax as well when they came back.

If they come back.

Shaking the dark thought from your mind, you submerged yourself again and held your breath for as long as you could. It was only for 25 seconds, but when you came back out, you could faintly hear the alarm bells on your belt, hung over the divider.

Is it them? Or is it something else…?

Your heart raced at the thought of being naked while intruders came upon your camp.

I don’t hear Owly or Scratch.

A few more moments passed as you listened to footsteps echoing in the cavern. Then you finally heard your name being called. 

Oh, thank goodness. “Over here!” you called out.

As you heard them walk over, you quickly realized that if they came around the screen, they’d see you naked. “Wait wait wait! Let me get my clothes on!” Quickly drying yourself with a towel for once and throwing your dress on, you came out to see them looking bloodied and exhausted.

“You look freshly washed,” Shadowheart said, the longing for a bath evident in her voice.

You grinned. “You can too, shortly. Come, come!” You showed everyone the bath set up, watching their expressions growing relieved that they could have a warm bath even in this darkened place.

“I’ll get food going,” you said as everyone else played rock-paper-scissors for who would go first in the bath.

You quickly threw together some cured meats and cheese together as an appetizer before putting some ingredients in the pot for a hearty stew, inspired by Gale’s meal yesterday morning. In a separate, smaller pot, you cooked some rice to go with it.

You tucked your wet hair behind your ears as you worked, and once you were done, you put your hands over your head and sang a quick drying cantrip that gently drew the water away without taking out too much moisture. If there was one thing you were a bit vain about, it was your hair, and you took good care of it.

The soft footsteps behind you seemed tentative, yet the cadence sounded familiar. He stopped directly behind you and gently grasped your shoulders.

“Welcome back, Astarion.”

He only hummed softly, one hand moving your hair to one side before dipping his head down to nuzzle your neck.

“You want supper now, or later?”

Astarion took a deep breath, inhaling your scent. “Later, darling, when we’re alone.”

Your body reacted instantly to his lowered tone, but you quickly tamped down on it. You knew he had felt your rush of blood when his grip on your shoulders tightened just a little bit.

You turned and looked up at him, but he only had a soft expression as he looked at you. Reaching out and cupping his face, you searched his emotions as he leaned into your touch. You could feel mostly contentment with a strand of anxiety weaved within.

He finally backed away from you. “Until tonight, then.”

Dammit. I wish I could help him with his anxiety.

During supper, everyone took turns describing the battle with the devil to you. It was a very hectic fight, and it sounded like everyone was pushed to their limits. But their teamwork and their communication had grown so much that they pulled through in the end and defeated him. 

“We even got Astarion to graciously say thank you,” Wyll joked.

Glancing over at him, you saw that he was looking a bit grumpy at being reminded about it. You snickered softly.

They continued to tell you about the rest of their adventure, and how they were feeling exhausted by the time they had finished exploring all of the rooms and gathering all of the orbs needed to activate the final elevator that would take them down to what they believed would be the final level of the Gauntlet.

“Tomorrow, we’ll end this,” Shadowheart said with determination. 

With supper completed, everyone broke off to relax and turn in for the night. Astarion turned to you. 

“I’ll go have a bath. See you in our tent, lover.”

Our? “Alright. Do you want me to make the water hotter for you?”

“Let’s go test it, shall we?”

Heading over to the bath with you, he dipped his hand into the water. “Seems adequate.”

You looked at him, an eyebrow raised. “But not perfect.”

“If you could…”

“Easy,” you said with confidence before singing a hotter water rune. Once it took hold, steam came out of the water. Turning around at the sound of shuffling clothing, you realized that Astarion was already stripping behind you.

“Astarion!” you gasped as you turned back around.

“You’ve seen all of me already, darling.”

That was only a glance, and it was in the middle of the inn. That doesn’t count. “Anyway I’m going back now byeeee,” you said in a rush as you nearly ran from him. His laughter followed you all the way back to the tent.

It was still a bit surreal to you, having your bedroll in his tent. You laid down and stared at the canopy, the red and gold fabric looking a bit dull in the dim light of your cantrip.

He won't mind if I do this, right? I wonder…

You sat up, put your hands up in the air, and sang.

Moonbeams and starlight,

Paint the sky above me,

Light up before my eyes,

A sparkly sight to see.

The fabric glittered for a moment then darkened, and pinpricks of light began to form in the darkness. You gestured with your hands purposely through the air as if you were weaving, and lights of different strengths and sizes, with different tints of color, populated the ‘sky’ you had created. You even created a full moon so that there was still enough light for you to see, but not too glaring.

Satisfied with your work, you lay back and stared up, feeling much less claustrophobic.

Astarion came in, shirtless and hair wet, with a seductive expression on his face, but then he looked up, and his expression changed to that of innocent wonder. To you, it was a much more attractive look on him. 

His eyes were round with amazement as he looked at the ceiling. “This is… beautiful.” He sat down next to you and smiled. “You completely distracted me from my plan.”

“And what plan was that?”

“Convince you to dry and brush my hair for me.”

You snickered. “You only need to ask, no need for a plan.”

He gave you a smarmy smirk. “But if you offered it freely, I wouldn’t need to ask.”

Rolling your eyes, you sat up and gestured for him to sit in front of you. Getting up onto your knees, you sang your hair drying cantrip slowly, since his hair was finer and more delicate than yours. Then you gently brushed his hair, first with your fingers, then with his brush.

“Gods, your touch feels so good,” he murmured.

That line, in another context, would have made your face heat up. Even now, you swallowed, your throat suddenly dry. “Glad you feel relaxed,” you mumbled, trying to push down any naughty thoughts.

He turned and took the brush from your hand. Slowly he ran his fingers up your bare arms, his eyes gazing at your body.

“Astarion?” you whispered.

Moving closer, he cupped your cheek. “You promised me supper, didn’t you?”

You nodded and tipped your head, exposing your neck.

Astarion leaned forward and licked your pulse. “Such an enticing treat,” he purred before he sank his teeth into your neck. With one hand gripping the back of your head, the other snaked around your backside and pulled you close, his body lining up with yours. You could feel the hard lines of his chest against your soft bosom, his muscled thigh resting between your legs.

You gasped softly as your hips moved on their own, searching for friction against him. But somewhere along the way, you realized that you had stopped feeling his emotions. Even with his fangs deep in your neck, you only felt the sting of your own flesh.

“Astarion—”

He released you from his bite, languidly licking your wound before he pulled back to look at you. Letting go of your head, he grabbed your bottom with both hands and pulled you harder against him. He buried his face into the crook of your neck and nibbled at your collarbone.

“Darling,” he rumbled against your skin, “does this feel good?” His hands traveled up and down your body, a slow, sensual exploration.

“Y-yes,” you gasped when one of his hands trailed up to gently caress your breast, a finger brushing against your sensitive nipple.

Then you looked at him. His eyes were on you, but something about his expression seemed as if he was realms away. You cupped his face with both hands.

You felt nothing.

It was like a bucket of cold water when you realized he had shut down. You put your hands on his chest and gently pushed him away. “I… I don’t think we’re ready for this.”

He looked hurt for a moment, and you could feel it through your touch. 

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled.

He shook his head. “It’s alright. I should have asked first.”

It’s not me I’m worried about. “That wasn’t it. You seemed… not all here.”

He blinked. Then he looked away, but you caught the misery in his expression.

You slid off his thigh and took his hands in yours. You were hit so hard with a wall of revulsion that you had to hide your gasp, acting as if you were taking a deep breath. “Astarion?”

He turned back to you with a sad expression. “I can’t help but feel… tainted.”

Your eyes widened in surprise.

“Not by you, darling. You… you’re incredible. You deserve something real. I want”—he pointed back and forth between the two of you—“this, to be real.”

He sighed dolefully. “But after two centuries of playing the rake… I just don't know what real looks like. Any kind of intimacy was just something I performed, to lure victims back…to him.”

You squeezed his hands and kept silent, nodding for him to continue.

“I want to be with you. I truly do. But these feelings of disgust and loathing… They keep coming up. And I don’t know how else… to be intimate… with you.”

Gods, I didn’t realize it was that bad. You let go of his hands and pulled him into a hug, resting his head on your shoulder. You carded your fingers through his hair and kissed the top of his head. “You take all the time you need to work through this,” you said softly. “Just let me hug you, and I’ll be happy.”

Slowly, his arms came around you and hugged you back. “This is enough for you?” he asked hesitantly.

“More than enough. We’ll take it one step at a time, at whatever pace you need.”

His body, which had felt tense in the beginning, steadily relaxed in your arms. The feelings of revulsion and guilt slowly faded, replaced by a sense of relief and…

Safety? I’ve felt this from him before, when I asked for a hug in the Underdark…

You hummed a lullaby as you led him down to the bedroll and held him close, running one hand through his soft hair while you gently rubbed his back with the other.

“Is this alright?” you asked.

He nodded and pressed his face further into the crook of your neck.

You continued to hum your song until you felt him fall into a trance.

“Sweet dreams,” you murmured, kissing his forehead.

---------------------

Act II, Chapter 7 End notes: Some more soft and fluff, but soon, we’ll get out of Act 2. Only two more chapters to go before we start Act 3! And a bit of heads up, I'm going to be leaning more into that hurt/comfort tag in Act 3, so if you're squeamish about injuries (I am, so I won't be writing very descriptively, but painful things WILL be happening), just be warned now.

Tags List: @numblytemporary @xalphafox @avitute @stormyjane7 @kmoon21

#bg3 #astarion x f!reader #bg3 fanfic #baldur's gate 3 #female reader #writing #bg3 spoilers #your hearth is my home #astarion

[thinkin-bout-milgram]

Mahiru Shiina: Trial 2 Synthesis Theory

Hello everyone! For the “I Love You” drop, I’m just going to jump straight into a full-length theory because I have a LOT that I want to cover and it’s much more comprehensive than my initial thoughts posts usually are. This is partially because all four other admins helped me out, as well as our 6th roommate who isn’t an admin!

As always, I will be using the very fast translation done by @onigiriico, which is linked here! I’ll also be using @iaobug ‘s wonderful translation of Mahiru’s 16 step guide in This Is How To Be In Love With You, which I’ll put here. 

T/W: Suicide, stalking, kidnapping/abduction, toxic relationships, murder, hanging, drowning, malnourishment, force feeding a rat. There WILL be images so please read at your own discretion!

Alright, let’s jump into it!

Mahiru’s murder took place in Aokigahara, AKA the Sea of Trees, AKA the Suicide Forest.

This is based on an initial post by @tomoesan, which has since become unavailable. I’ll post a photo of it here, though:

It compares Mahiru’s murder location on her card from Undercover to a real place in Japan: Aokigahara. From the pictures, it’s very clear that this was an intentional move by the artists to place Mahiru’s murder somewhere actively recognizable through some google searches. I firmly believe that the forest that they move through in the MV is Aokigahara. 

That��s not all, though. From this image, you can pretty clearly see that the photo seems to be taken from inside a cave. We’ve determined this specific cave to be Ryugu Cave, or The Dragon Cave.

This article shows the exact same photo in the earlier post, citing it as being from the Ryugu Cave. 

The Ryugu Cave also contains the Seno Umi Shrine, within it. You can read a bit about it here, but I firmly believe this to be the shrine mentioned on Day 15 of This Is How To Be In Love With You; more on that later.

Furthermore, the shrine is to Toyotama-hime. In mythology, this references a goddess who falls in love with a prince at a water well. However, he breaks a promise not to spy on her, which results in him seeing her in a monstrous form. Given the lyrical translation of daisuki (which should just mean I love you repeatedly) in the chorus to “monstrously in love,” “monstrous cause I love you,” “monstrous dilemma”... I think that the writers absolutely knew what they were going for, and they were giving a nod to this specific story and the shrine, with Mahiru being the lover turned monster.

Based on all of this, and the fact that I do believe Mahiru’s lover committed suicide, I think that all signs point to Aokigahara, specifically Ryugu Cave, being the location of the murder. I’ll be using this assumption throughout the rest of my theory.

I’ll follow along with the guide, starting at Days 1-8.

I think that Mahiru portrays Days 1-8 approximately correctly.

Days 1-7 are, I think, completely correct. Mahiru meets this guy, assumes it’s fate, and does small things to try to get closer to him and get to know about him. At this point, things probably seem completely normal to him, so there wouldn’t be any reason for him to reject her jogging with him or whatever.

Day 8 is when she waits outside his work, takes him to the park and presumably confesses her love to him. This is where her first inconsistency is. 

She says that they talked the night away, but she also says that she “chooses not to believe they talked the night away” and that “it felt like no time passed at all.” She also very notably doesn’t actually say what his response was, though she implied it was positive.

I think that it was actually very short; rather than them talking the night away, he probably swiftly rejected her. This, therefore, ends Mahiru’s attempts to get him into a relationship normally. If he won’t love her the way she wants him to, she’ll find a way to make it happen, no matter what.

Mahiru sets a plan into action, starting Day 9.

This is the first page in her journal where the text switches from normal, pristine rows to slanted text. That’s a sign that something is going wrong.

She mentions that her “boyfriend” is really cute when he’s blackout drunk. I think that it’s possible she drugged him, but even if she didn’t, she used this to get some kind of information. It’s possible she brought him back to his house, getting his address, possibly even stealing keys or something like that. 

I’d theorize that, rather than going here together, she followed him to the bar. Once he was pretty drunk, it’d be a lot easier to convince him to go along with her.

Day 10 is her talking to her beautician; I think that’s all correct. The beautician simply heard about the story through Mahiru’s eyes.

Day 11 is, I think, similar to the bar; she probably followed him to the “date” location. She says it “can’t be a coincidence” their tastes are so similar and that she’s become a different person. That indicates that this isn’t actually a shared taste: he went to the location and she followed him there.

On Day 12, Mahiru abducts her lover.

Day 12 is the day when Mahiru goes to his house for the first time, but somehow, she can’t actually seem to remember anything.

While that alone is suspicious, there’s also the mirror. We can see her beautician in the mirror, so the fact that he isn’t in the mirror at all seems to imply that he isn’t within the camera’s view at all. Why is she in his entryway without him there to greet her?

The answer is that she’s uninvited. She enters his home, and she takes him. That’s what I think the shot of her jumping on the couch spreading the flowers in This Is How To Be In Love With You is:

Rather than this being her killing moment, I think that this is her going in and snatching him from his own house. I firmly believe that Mahiru took him to Aokigahara, and I think that this is when she did it.

The scene in the house with the feathers immediately follows Day 12, so it makes sense chronologically. Additionally, for Day 13 onwards, the text switches from just being slanted to being stitched together from smaller boxes; it seems like it’s mimicking a ransom note that’s patched together from magazine or book clippings. This indicates that this is when Mahiru is more actively committing a crime: in this case, kidnapping. 

Days 13-15 are Mahiru moving the body.

If we assume that Mahiru’s end destination is Ryugu Cave based on earlier research, Days 13, 14 and 15 can be interpreted as movement.

Day 13 may seem strange, given that it’s Mahiru seemingly attending a wedding. However, if you pay careful attention to her phrasing, she does not say that she actually attended. She says that she was invited, and that soon, her dreams will come true. I think it’s possible that the wedding location was closer to Aokigahara–it’s near Mt. Fuji, so I’d imagine there could be some scenic locations or something–and she’s mentally using the wedding as a justification for heading that direction. Maybe she even did attend, if it was over that way.

Day 14 is an outdoor date under the stars. She practically begged him to come along. This is her taking him into the woods. I’m not sure exactly how compliant he was being and if she literally dragged him or if he was in more of a “resisting seems like a bad idea” kind of headspace, but I believe that Day 14 is them arriving at the forest and entering. 

It’s notable that, in the scenes in I Love You, Mahiru seems to be leading her lover into the forest. Here’s a screenshot from around 1:37:

At this point, it doesn’t seem like he’s being forced. However, this ends with him groveling on the ground at 1:55.

Comparing that to the image immediately after, we understand that Mahiru isn’t seeing the situation clearly. Given that he’s in this kneeling position in both shots, I think it’s safe to say that the shots with the golden lighting are the situation through Mahiru’s eyes. 

He’s very clearly actually beaten down and miserable, but Mahiru depicts them as a cute and happy couple. In fact, at 1:20, the lyrics support this interpretation:

This too-perfect image of her relationship is captioned with “I actually believed that.” It’s telling us, the audience, that while she actually, genuinely believed that these fantasy segments were reality, we, perhaps, should not do the same. These fantasy segments aren’t real.

Mahiru has already proven her capability of being an unreliable narrator in the past, concealing a lot of information within the text of her 16 Day Guide. I don’t want to completely discount these fantasies, but I’m trusting the side by side comparisons it gives us that they are NOT, in any way shape or form, what she portrays them as. I don’t want to take any of it at face value.

Anyways, Day 15 is the end destination of their journey: the arrival at Ryugu Cave. This is the shrine that she mentions. 

As stated earlier, Ryugu Cave contains a shrine. Though the cave isn’t available to tourists, that just increases the chances that Mahiru could get away with imprisoning her captive there without being spotted by the patrols that go through.

For reference, this cave is very deep: 96 m, or approximately 315 ft. It would be pretty hard for him to escape once they’re there, which resounds with her wish: they’ll stay like that until the end of time, and no one will stand in her way.

Day 16 is… a snapping point.

Day 16 is when we see Mahiru prepare her lovely boyfriend a wonderful meal of all his favorites. I think that this is when the 2:13/2:14 fantasy split happens:

While she sees herself giving him cake pleasantly, in reality, she seems to be… force feeding him a rat?? 

I know some people think that the cake is a metaphor for toxicity, and that because he feeds it to her first in the video, it means that the relationship is mutually toxic. From what I’ve seen, this theory completely disregards both the rat aspect and the fantasy filter over the cake scene. I think it’s far more likely that him feeding her cake was Mahiru idealizing the real events. Maybe she ate the rats, too, and she liked to think he’d feed her, too. It’s them eating together; if the cake can be a rat, him feeding it to her can be a similarly significant misperception. 

In any case, given that this is the last day in the guide, I think that this is the end of the line for him. He can’t take being her captive anymore, and sometime when she’s not away, he commits suicide.

I’m not entirely sure how. Obviously, we see him hanging at several points in the video, most prominently at the end:

But we can also see that he appears to be soaked with water at the very beginning.

There are lakes within Ryugu Cave. They’d also likely be cold enough to give him some form of hypothermia, explaining the blue tint to his skin in the second of the two images (he seems to have dried off by the second). Because of this, I’m somewhat inclined to lean towards drowning because it seems like it would have been more accessible to him. In that case, though, I’m not sure how he ends up hanging. I don’t feel like Mahiru would put him there; it feels much more likely to me that she would jump into the lake with him so that they could be together forever or something. 

So, I’m not sure whether he hangs himself or drowns himself, but the gist is, he ends up dead. That’s what Mahiru blames herself for.

VOTE: GUILTY

I know that she’s currently leaning innocent and many people feel strongly about it, but please hear me out here.

In Mahiru’s audio drama, she very clearly does not grasp the gravity of what she did. If she really did kidnap him, bring him to the suicide forest and force feed him rats… that is NOT loving someone “normally,” as she’s so insistent that she did.

Her current perception is that when she loves someone normally, it’s wrong. That’s what she’s said about her guilty verdict. However, if we switch gears and vote her innocent, what will that tell her? 

I think it would tell her that her love is okay–and, to the delusional Mahiru, that means saying that all of what she did is okay. If she believes this is loving someone normally, then I’d rather tell her not to love anyone like this again. It’s going to be hard for her to accept, and I recognize we might lose her between trials, but I think telling her that this is okay is even worse.

I do meta vote, but I do it in the context of trying to secure as many viable innocent votes for the third trial as possible. I think that, if we vote Mahiru innocent, she’ll go back to her fully delusional self. I think guilty is the only way to make the message stick, and the message has to stick if she has a chance at getting an innocent verdict in the end. I really urge you to consider it, because I think that voting her innocent will be a huge mistake on the fanbase’s part (which is the same exact way I felt about the Kotoko vote in Trial 1).

#admin venus #milgram #ミルグラム #mahiru shiina #milgram theory #mahiru milgram #sorry it's sorta late! we were researching REAL hard #this one really messed us up #the fact that it happened in a real location that i can learn actual info about just... it feels less like fiction #listen guys i also really like mahiru #but i for real feel like some of you guys are kidding yourselves too #this wasn't a mutually toxic relationship that was both of their faults. only one of them abducted the other into the suicide forest #please at least consider the guilty vote #if we vote her inno this round then i don't think she has a shot at being releasable back into society at the end #fr yall dont understand how hard we were researching stuff we went full bonkers mode for ~2 hours researching & there was 6 of us -mercury

[bread-and-roses-too]

I've talked before about how, while there's no ethical consumption under capitalism, there is standout UNethical consumption that should be avoided so here are some tips I use as someone with a general vendetta against Amazon:

use the shopping tab on google instead of going straight to amazon when you want to buy something.

[image ID: an image of a google search for "cool lamps". The cursor is hovering over the second tab to the right under the search bar, which is labeled "shopping".]

this will allow you to look through a variety of sellers that sell the item you're looking for. You can also sort by seller, price, condition, and other factors using this feature.

look everywhere else first. I pretty much only click on Amazon when I've exhausted all of the other options on the shopping tab.

The Better Business Bureau is your friend. Some non-Amazon websites can be sketchy as hell. If the business is based in the U.S., Mexico, or Canada, the BBB is basically the mother of all review sites. If you suspect a company is suppressing negative reviews, or if they don't post them at all, check with the BBB to see if the business has a page and if people have complained.

You can also look up "is [website] a scam". This is a bit jankier and less official but it does work. Usually if a website is conning people out of their money someone has posted to somewhere complaining about it.

Choose smaller sellers if applicable.

[image ID: an image of a white origami-style ceiling light made to look like a lapu lapu or grouper fish. the seller is VasiliLights on Etsy, and the price is $243.18 and shipping is $34.29].

Obviously if you're looking for a specific item it's probably only sold on a certain store's website, but if you're looking for unique pieces, it's actually fairly fulfilling to buy from a smaller seller. When you buy from places like Ebay and Etsy, or from smaller websites owned by the seller, you're handing most of that money over to a real person like you who will go and spend it on things they want and need. Sellers are also genuinely happy and grateful when something sells, my mom has been a seller on Ebay for years and she still gets excited when she makes a sale.

If an Etsy seller has a personal website, buy from there instead. This is more of an anti-corporation tip than a specific anti-Amazon tip.

[Image ID: a screenshot of the Etsy shop page for neurodelightful that also displays the address for their website, neurodelightful.com].

Sites like Etsy still take big fees from their sellers which can make business more challenging and result in sellers not being paid properly for their work. Personal sites help reduce this so sellers will often promote them on their shop page. If you like your money to go into the hands of real people and not corporations, buy from their personal website instead.

Take notice when artists advertise their shops here on Tumblr. It can be easy to school by someone asking for money but a lot of people on here sell genuinely amazing art. @/cypric-rat-hyperfixation, @/dappermouth, @/pangur-and-grim, @/pidgie-core, @/ultrainfinitepit, and @/pikaole are just a few people I can think of who sell their art and it's usually cheaper than buying the same mass produced painting that everyone has in their house.

Switch out your Amazon wishlist for a Throne wishlist. One of my biggest pet peeves about leaving amazon was no longer having a wishlist to display on social media that people could actually buy from. Throne filled that role for me. Copy a link for the item you want, click "add gift", paste the link, adjust the price if needed, and bam, now anyone can but it for you. You can even set up crowdfunding for items costing over $10. It's also sex worker friendly and allows you to have NSFW items on your list if you choose!

Finally, understand that there are just some things you won't be able to find elsewhere. Don't beat yourself up for buying a non-essential item from Amazon once in a blue moon. Amazon is a massive overarching corporation that can be extremely hard to avoid especially if you need to shop for things at cheaper prices. The overall goal is to reduce the money given to them and increase the money given to other sellers to send a message that our favor with Amazon is waning and they need to change things to win it back.

[practically-an-x-man]

OC ask time :3

Your characters have the opportunity to gain the power to speak to one species of animal. Once they pick their species, it's permanent and cannot be changed latter. (Sub species still work, but the further away from the origin species, the harder they are to understand. If someone picked a Transvaal lion, they'd be able to communicate with all lion species well enough, but speaking to a housecat still in the Felidae family would have some significant language barriers.) Who would use the power immediately? Who would not care and completely forget about it? Who would jokingly pick some random animal then immediately regret it?

Ooooh this one's really cool!!! Thank you so much!

Rae: Thinks it's a very cool power, but struggles to pick out what animal since she travels so much (ideally she'd pick something either domesticated or cosmopolitan). Ends up picking a European rabbit - native to Europe, obviously, but introduced as an invasive species to a lot of countries. She doesn't end up using the power as much as she'd hope, but it's nice to have the resource available to her.

Robin: Peter jokingly suggests that she pick an actual American robin, just for the irony of it, but she can't think of anything better so she goes with it. It's a strange balance of useful and annoying. On the one hand, they're everywhere. On the other hand, they're everywhere.

Madison: Domesticated dogs. Already a very useful power with how widespread dogs are, but also allows her to link to wolves, coyotes, and other related canids as needed. Perfect for an X-Man who needs to get information in a populated area, and perfect for a wilderness survivalist who needs to let the nearby wolves know that she's not encroaching on their territory and she'll be gone the next morning.

Ophelia: Would spend so much time debating the merits of one animal over another, considering the native and invasive species of where she lives versus just picking a domesticated animal that would be commonplace anywhere, the amount of closely-related species, etc... that she eventually gets absorbed into another project without ever actually picking an animal

Jasper: Also picks domesticated dogs, but with the idea that that would be a useful skill in nursing - being able to communicate directly with alert dogs, seeing eye dogs, therapy dogs, or any other service dog they might encounter.

Kestrel: Can already communicate with animals by transforming into them as needed - would completely forget about this power since it's so similar to the one they already have.

Katherine: Housecats. She's most closely linked to Bastet out of all the gods, so it's just the most practical for her. Plus, they're widespread

Quinn: Thinks on this for a while, then says... human. Is this allowed? Probably not. She argues that humans are technically still animals, and she already can't communicate with most of them - there's 7 billion people on Earth, so her understanding English is the equivalent to knowing that a cat arching its back is a warning, in the grand scheme of things. In the end, this gives her the ability of rudimentary conversation in any language on Earth, should she ever need it. Leave it to Quinn to beeline towards the first loophole she can find.

Eris: Received this power hundreds of years back, and ended up picking a Barbary lion for their animal - for one thing, they weren't expecting to move very far outside Northern Africa, since travel was far from streamlined at that point... and today they're an extinct species at that. Not the most useful power in the world. Whoops.

Nikoletta: Some kind of pest animal - they're everywhere, which makes them great for espionage and learning secrets. Either she'd go with pigeons, or she'd take a page out of Cleo's book and communicate with rats.

#my friends!!! #answered asks #my ocs #jasper wilson #ophelia octavius #madison douglas #oc quinn/aces #oc katherine johnson #oc kestrel #rae mckinney #robin cassidy #oc eris #nikoletta bordeaux

[strange-creature-with-a-hat]

HELLO, WELCOME, WHY DON'T YOU TAKE A SEAT? RELAX, GET COMFORTABLE, TAKE A SECOND IF YOU NEED TO

THIS HERE IS MY TUMBLR BLOG AND I THINK I SHOULD WRITE SOME THINGS

Here's my little blog site thingy, I'd recommend using it while viewing my blog, so the posts aren't annoying white blocks

Y'all can call me Creature or Archivist (among other things, check pronouns page down below for info), I go by it/they pronouns, as well as any neopronouns

HERE'S A LIST OF DISCLAIMERS AND STUFF ABOUT MY BLOG

One: GENERAL WARNING FOR INSECTS, ARACHNIDS, AND OTHER BUGS IN THIS BLOG I like bugs, they're really cool! but if they aren't your jam should warn you that there's A few here

I SHOULD ALSO ADD THAT IM REALLY INTERESTED IN JUST ABOUT ANY OTHER ANIMAL THAT PEOPLE FIND SCARY

Two: this is my only account, I don't have a side blog or art blog right now, if you specifically want to see my art you can use my art tag (tags listed below)

Three: I block freely so I'm not writing a big dni, don't interact if you fall under basic dni criteria (racists, pedos, nazis, etc. You know who you are), terfs don't interact (although I don't see why you decided to come here in the first place)

Four: WARNING FOR EYESTRAIN!!!! I LIKE BRIGHT COLORS!!!! Oh and eyes, A lot of eyes

If I should start tagging stuff as warnings just ask <3 I might not be amazing at it but I'll tr

SOME STUFF IM INTERESTED IN

Wings of fire*

Will wood*

Warrior cats*

Wander over yonder

Lemon demon*

Animaniacs

Ride the cyclone

Hamilton

The beetlejuice musical

The Jekyll and Hyde musical*

Tally hall

Miracle musical

Jack stauber

Lackadaisy

Gravity falls

Across the spider-verse

Birds (mainly birds of prey)

Sea Creatures

Bugs

animals that people find scary in general

Fossils

history

Space

Rats

My chemical romance*

The owl house

The strange case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde*

The glass scientists*

The Magnus Archives*

A bunch of other things

*starred interests are ones I mainly post about*

MY SUPER COOL TAGS

MY ART POSTS

#creature draws : this one has my art!

#creatures neon dragons : this one has some simple brightly colored sketches of dragons on a black background (im not sure I'm continuing this, all posts here are old)

#super cool art : other peoples art that I reblog

MY TEXT POSTS

#creatures ted-talks / #creatures ted talks : these have my text posts, stuff where I talk (I don't do so very often)

#creature answers : this one has my answers to asks and responses to tags

MY REBLOG STUFF

#creature rambles In someone else's post : self explanatory, I talk in someone else's post

#very important post (vip) : this one has posts I find important, nowadays I stick to things with helpful links

#creatures faves : posts I really like

#creatures faves² : posts I really really like

#creatures saved files : this one has things I want to save for later

#creatures saved files art edition : art tips and color palettes I wanna save

INTERESTS

#wee woo : will wood related stuff

#silly music people doing silly things : other musician related stuff (where you'll find lemon demon and mcr posts grouped together, yaaayy!!)

#casualdejekyll and formaldehyde : Jekyll and Hyde related stuff

#Normal British archives : The Magnus Archives related stuff

#wof of fire : wings of fire related stuff

#warrior kitty cats : warrior cats related stuff

(edit 2/20/24 THEY TOOK THE YELLOW TEXT AWAY WHAT THE FUCK)

(don't worry I'll figure out how to fill this empty space someday)

In The meantime here's a playlist of my favorite songs

HERE'S MY PRONOUNS PAGE, THIS HAS MY NAMES, PRONOUNS, WHAT WORDS YOU SHOULD CALL ME, AND OTHER GAY STUFF

Stay tuned, in the next update I might have My interests organized (I'm making a spacehey) ←ok this might not happen any time soon lolz

#I recommend checking in here every once in a while because I update this post every so often (just check to see the latest update ↓ #Update 4/21/24 : added info to names| edited disclaimer three (its kind of a dni now) |edited some tag info|added Wof and warrior cats tag

[rainbowfoxes]

IDW! Raph Should be a Cat-Boy, Here's Why

Good evening (or whenever this post may find you) I have a silly little theory for you today.

(A brief content warning: the comic pages shown here do depict two animals fighting. Just a heads up)

So as we all know, Mutagen tends to work like so:

Critter + Ooze + DNA of Another Critter = Mutant

Simple, easy, consistent, right?

However

In issue #3 of IDW's run, we learn how itty bitty not-yet-a-mutant Raphael got separated from the other turtles. The stray cat that would go on to be Old Hob had scooped him up with every intent to eat him, and little Raphie was lost in the scuffle when Splinter came to his rescue, as you can see below:

{Start Image ID: Three pages from IDW's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles issue #3. Set in an alley, the pre-mutated turtles, Splinter, and Old Hob stand in a pool of glowing green mutagen. Old Hob has snatched one of the baby turtles, Raphael, into his mouth with intent to eat him. Splinter attacks Old Hob to save the turtle. Raphael is lost in the scuffle, Splinter sustains a serious leg injury, and Old Hob loses one of his eyes. Old Hob flees the scene. :End Image ID}

That glowing green goo up there? That's mutagen. Everyone is getting covered in it. But it also means that Raph-a-little's first post-mutagen exposure DNA contact is Old Hob, a cat. It also means that the most significant presence of outside DNA on little Raphie is feline DNA.

Ergo, Raph's a cat-boy.

Now what does this mean in practice? Whatever you want, I'm not a cop. Does he have a luttle fuzzy tail and toe beans? Cat eyes and sharp teeth? does he get high off of catnip? Up to you! Do whatever sparks joy. 🌈

Preemptive Counter-Arguments:

Wait, doesn't this mean Splinter is part cat, too? And part turtle? Yes, but this isn't about him.

Doesn't it also mean that the other turtles are part rat? See above.

Doesn't it ALSO mean that Old Hob — See. Above.

Okay, but what about the Mutagen Bomb and Mutant Town? We never see any hybrid mutants there! Look. Look. If I had to design dozens of unique anthropomorphic characters that I could reliably draw the same way each time, and that other artists who I may never talk to can ALSO reliably draw the same way each time and keep them identifiable as the same characters? I'd walk into oncoming traffic. Making any or all of those characters hybrids between two or more species? Forget about it. I could look at Sophie Campbell's art all day, but I would not wish such a task on my worst enemy. Plus writing wise? It gives them an easy way to power scale mooks like Bebop and Rocksteady. What's scarier than a rhino man with no regard for the laws of men? A rhino man with no regards for the laws of men who is also a shark.

Fine, but where'd their human DNA come from? Not that it really matters, but probably the Foot genin who put the turtles in that sack in the first place (you can see he isn't wearing gloves in the flashback from issue #2, if you care to look). Or maybe from all the scientists that handled them on the daily, seeing as they were lab animals. Or the alley they're in in those pages up there. Do you know what people do in alleys? There's probably hundreds of unique samples of human DNA in the square foot they're standing in alone.

But they're TURTLES not CAT-BOYS!!!!! This is you:

{Start Image ID: The classic, unedited "NO FUN ALLOWED" robot with a sign meme. :End Image ID}

Go forth and prosper with this new knowledge. If you make any fanworks based on this fun little headcanon, tag me in it or shoot me a link. I wanna see all the little cat-boy Raphs.

#tmnt #idw tmnt #raphael #tmnt raphael #just a fun little meta/head canon to bring me joy after a long day #oh hmmm also i guess trigger warnings for the comic panels #violence against animals

[cotl-bloodlust]

TW For cover: Blood, Nudity BLOODLUST Info

Behold, all the links to my comic Bloodlust, a COTL fan comic. This comic is a GIANT SPOILER. If you haven't completed the game I don't suggest you read as it is full of information you may want to find out on your own. Rating: Young Adult+

Main characters: Lamb (He/they), The One Who Waits (Narinder) (He/Him), and a certain rat named Saul (They/Them)

Genre: Drama, Thriller (Eventually I’ll get to redrawing pages but for now I want to get the ones I have done up) TW: Blood, Gore, Death, Violence, Cussing, Mental health mentions, cussing, sexual topics.

Page one

Page two

Page three (In the works) Page four (tba) DeviantArt ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- About me: Hi! I go by Cultist, and if you were an OG follower you probably saw that username! I used to post novels but now I convert them into comics. Feel free to message me! I'm a libra, main and only creator of BLOODLUST, and I drink more tea than I should. You can use any pronouns but they/them is preferred. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- About asks: All asks are allowed! If I'm uncomfortable with an ask, I just won't answer it. (Send in an ask to Nari or Lamb and the characters will respond in a way that matches their character in my au <3)

#BLOODLUST #BLOODLUST AU #cotl #cotl fanart #cotl spoilers #cotl the one who waits #cotl narinder #fan comic #my au #my art

[idanny374]

Introduction to SEO Factors

When implementing SEO as a marketing strategy for your company, several factors are required. The first thing to think about is the niche we are to rank well in search engines, Philadelphia search engine optimization. We must keep in mind that the niche we choose must be distinct enough for us to rule in that particular niche. Both the number of rivals and the level of product demand in that segment must be taken into account.

Additionally, we need to think about the terms we are utilizing. Keep in mind that we are vying for the top place in search engines to enhance the likelihood that our website will be seen more often and get more visitors. A good SEO strategy would place our website on the top pages of these search engines whenever a user types a certain set of keywords associated with our specialty, resulting in higher traffic from targeted individuals who are undoubtedly prospective clients.

We aim to dominate search engine results, or if that's not possible, to do well in the rankings game. We can engage an SEO specialist to handle it if we are unfamiliar with it or have no expertise at all. This may ease the pressure on us to try out novel tactics that could fail.

Our search engine rankings depend on a variety of criteria. It consists of methods like keywords, niches, high-quality content, links, and others. Additionally, the clarity of our website and product is crucial. The more likely it is that we will get a higher position in search engines since they will comprehend our product better if we have done this.

There is only one way to demonstrate our value, and that is for our website to rise to the top of search results. Only through dominating the search engines will we be able to increase our online presence, exposure, popularity, and authority. To attain this aim, our efforts should be directed at gaining the success we so much need to increase our revenue and attract new clients.

There are several beliefs on what would enhance search placement, as you will find out when you learn more about SEO. These hypotheses are confidently put online, but ultimately many of them are shown to be false. The algorithms of the proprietary search engines (like Google, Yahoo!, and Bing) are kept a highly guarded secret since otherwise, SEO experts would figure out methods to "game" the engines. Having said that, the following list includes several facts about which we can be quite certain.

The positions of your page in the organic search results are determined by the search engine and rely on several criteria, including:

Is your website's content abundant? Both website visitors and search engines are drawn to well-written content. Are the website's contents "search engine friendly" (Google)? There are several views about the "density" and placement of keywords, but one thing is for certain: without keywords, search engines would have trouble locating your website. For instance, it is crucial that the term "designer clothes for rats" really exist on a page if you want to optimize your site for it (there are other ways a page may rank for a word that does not appear in it, but why take the risk?). Is your website "searchable," i.e., does it have a link structure that makes it possible for a "crawler" to quickly discover each page on your site? Simply said, this indicates that the crawler leaves a trail through all of your pages. Unless it is uploaded directly to the search engines or via the submission of a site map, a page that is not linked to any other page on your website is probably not going to be indexed.

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Keto Flow Gummies Reviews 2022 Secret Updated Facts Behind Tea Burn Revealed!

Keto Flow Gummies :- Keto Flow Gummies claims to be a top quality weight loss supplement. He says it can help you blast fat and get the body of your dreams. And if we're being honest, that sounds good. If you're trying to lose weight, you'll probably stop at nothing. In fact, if you're like most of us, you've dreamed of having weight loss surgery before you called it quits. Well, maybe that's why you're here. You are looking for something that can help you lose weight faster than ever. But we are here to see if Keto Flow Gummies Cambogia is really going to help you. Or, if it's just a load of BS. Keep reading or click below to see if this now makes the top spot!

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What happens is that fat builds up in the body if there is insufficient physical activity every day to destroy the body. They appear as belly fat when stored. As a result, you look obese. In order to lose weight, as soon as you ingest, you must consume fat daily. Otherwise, it accumulates in the body and becomes obese.

Ingredients

The active ingredient in this weight loss supplement is called hydroxycitric acid (HCA). This supplement contains the highest concentration of HCA available on the market (60%). What does HCA do? Well, some scientific knowledge supports the idea that this property can help you lose weight by reducing your appetite. For example, some studies have been done on rats to support this notion. Since rodents in one study that were given HCA ended up consuming less food than the control group of rats. Are there other ingredients?

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helps you burn fat for energy

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Keto Flow Gummies Side Effects

Not everyone will experience side effects, but they are a possibility for some people. it all depends on you and your body. some people will react to this formula more strongly than others. Although you may not experience any side effects, another person may notice one or two. these effects will vary from person to person.

If you want to be on the safe side, talk to a medical professional before you start taking the Keto Flow Gummies dietary supplement. a doctor will be the best person to advise you on what to expect when taking such a product.

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If you are wondering about the cost of Keto Flow Gummies, that information will also be on the website. this offer is exclusive online. that means it's convenient. it also means that the price can change quickly. we don't want to promise you one price and will find you another one when you order.

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[totalhealthketogummiesreviews]

Total Health Keto Gummies Reviews: Check Price, Benefits & Customer Feedback 2022

Total Health Keto Gummies Reviews :- Total Health Keto Gummies claims to be a premium quality weight loss supplement. He says it can help you blast fat and get the body of your dreams. And if we're being honest, that sounds good. If you're trying to lose weight, you'll probably stop at nothing. In fact, if you're like most of us, you've dreamed of having weight loss surgery before you called it quits. Well, maybe that's why you're here. You are looking for something that can help you lose weight faster than ever. But we are here to see if Total Health Keto Gummies Cambogia will really help you. Or, if it's just a load of BS. Keep reading or click below to see if this now makes the top spot!

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Total Health Keto Gummies Pills contain exogenous ketones. Most keto pills contain this ingredient. But it is a dual action formula that also contains a special ingredient from an Ayurvedic herb called Indian Coleus. This special extract is called forskolin. Some scientific knowledge indicates that Forskolin can help boost metabolism. We'll talk more about the science and the credibility of the results below. Or you can get a top keto pill now while supplies last by pressing any button here!

Total Health Keto Gummies Reviews | How it works

Total Health Keto Gummies works through thermogenesis. First, it triggers this condition in the body and the fat burning process is accelerated. As the rate of fat metabolism increases, more and more fat is metabolized. This is very important to continue to control fat.

What happens is that fat builds up in the body if there is insufficient physical activity every day to destroy the body. They appear as belly fat when stored. As a result, you look obese. In order to lose weight, as soon as you ingest, you must consume fat daily. Otherwise, it accumulates in the body and becomes obese.

Ingredients

The active ingredient in this weight loss supplement is called hydroxycitric acid (HCA). This supplement contains the highest concentration of HCA available on the market (60%). What does HCA do? Well, some scientific knowledge supports the idea that this property can help you lose weight by reducing your appetite. For example, some studies have been done on rats to support this notion. Since rodents in one study that were given HCA ended up consuming less food than the control group of rats. Are there other ingredients?

We do not have access to a complete Total Health Keto Gummies Garcinia product label. Therefore, if you want complete ingredient information, you should call their customer support. Please visit the official Total Health Keto Gummies Garcinia Reviews website to find customer service contact information. Or you can click the button above to compare with another natural weight loss pill.

Benefits of the Total Health Keto Gummies Diet

Contains only natural ketones

Designed to help trigger ketosis

May help prolong life in ketosis

helps you burn fat for energy

Could help you feel more energetic

700 mg of powerful ketogenic blend

Total Health Keto Gummies Side Effects

Not everyone will experience side effects, but they are a possibility for some people. it all depends on you and your body. some people will react to this formula more strongly than others. Although you may not experience any side effects, another person may notice one or two. these effects will vary from person to person.

If you want to be on the safe side, talk to a medical professional before you start taking Total Health Keto Gummies dietary supplement. a doctor will be the best person to advise you on what to expect when taking such a product.

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Total Health Keto Gummies Price and How to Order

Sometimes manufacturers offer risk-free trials of their products. Visit the website using the links on this page to find out if there is a free trial version of Total Health Keto Gummies currently available! if so, be sure to sign up. stocks are usually limited and can run out quickly, so act now!

If you are wondering about the cost of Total Health Keto Gummies, that information will also be on the website. this offer is exclusive online. that means it's convenient. it also means that the price can change quickly. we don't want to promise you one price and will find you another one when you order.

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How Content Writing Boosts Your Website Conversion Rate?

It is no secret that the ultimate goal to have a website is to boost the conversion rate. After all, we are putting ourselves out so that there is a possibility of conversion. However, when it comes to the digital world, there is a possibility that your conversion rate might get influenced. The good news is that the process is not as difficult as it might seem, although extremely rewarding. Content writing does have a very positive correlation with the increase in website conversion rate. However, one thing that most have to be sure about is the regularity and efficacy.

Along with that, you have to remember that search engine optimization can direct the audience to your website. But keeping it hooked on and ensuring conversion rate is in your hands. It is where the picture of creativity comes into play.

What is the Need for a Good Conversation Rate at All?

There is a common opinion that chasing for a good conversion rate is like a rat race, and you should not indulge in it. However, it is to some extent an exaggeration. Directly or indirectly, most of us have websites to attract more audiences and land clients from a global base. And, without checking on the conversion rate, it is impossible to ensure the same.

Again, it’s worth considering that to maintain a website, you have to put in various costs. Hence, without a rise in the conversion rate, that would be a useless chase. There is a difference between content writing and copywriting, good copywriting services will make it imperative that there is a noticeable rise in the curve of your conversion rate.

Boosting Your Website Conversion Rate via Strategic Content Writing

There is a difference between professional web content writing services and amateurs, and that is the quality. When you hire a good service, half of your job gets done there. Here is how:

Creativity gets A Boost: With the help of content writing, you can talk about a particular topic related to your website in a very creative and attractive manner. Plating the thoughts in the same typical old fashion might seem a bit unwanted.

Consistency is The Key: Remember those days when our elders used to constantly tell us how being consistent can be helpful? Well, this trick works with conversion rate as well. Regularly updating your content ensures that it is always on the right page. Clients also like a website when they find it relevant, and hence the chances of conversion increase.

Credibility: Without any doubt, there is a direct link between credibility and high conversion rates. Quality content writing ensures that your site is credible and that is what most clients want as a prerequisite. If your website appears to be shady, there are fewer chances that anyone would make any purchase. Hence, it is always preferred that through appropriate content writing, you establish your website as a credible platform and also keep up to the standards.

You can Improve Search Engine rank: One might say – SEO is only for client direction and not for retention. Yes, that is true. However, with better search engine ranking, you also become more visible. And how does a good ranking come up? Well, obviously through quality content. With better ranking, the chances of visibility also increase manifold. Hence there is a better probability of conversion as well.

Interaction: The content has to be interactive to engage and retain the client. Appropriate writing conveys to your clients that their feedback and opinions do make a difference. It is how you build a relationship. Having a good rapport with your audience ensures a better conversion rate as well.

[whoacanada]

Zimbits - Bartender!Jack + NHL!Bitty AU

Prompt: Retired NHL player Jack Zimmermann takes ownership of a sports bar in Pittsburgh and accidentally falls for the Penguins’ (closeted) new left winger.

A/N - just the start, I’d like to get around to more of this; the basic idea was an It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia AU, but I couldn’t manage to make everyone that terrible so Jack owns and operates a gay sports bar and starts crushing on one of his patrons.

“Can’t believe you’ve owned this place since ’89.” Jack coughs, waving the dust away from his face. “Did you ever come back after we moved home?”

It’d be disingenuous to say Jack had been expecting anything other than cigars and whiskey when his father had invited him on a trip down to Pittsburgh to see Mario and glad-hand some Penguins sponsors. In fact, he’d kind of been looking forward to sulking and getting shit-faced, not limping around a condemned building dodging roaches and rats.

“It was an investment opportunity. That was the trend back then, famous athletes buying up restaurants and clubs — I had big plans for this building. Then your mother got pregnant and I realized I didn’t really give two shits about running a nightclub.”

“Realized you were pretty lazy, huh?”

As Bob laughs, Jack picks at the peeling, lacquered bartop, trying not to imagine how many decades of grime he’s just collecting under his nail, the situation made even more disgusting in such close proximity to the glittering gold championship ring his father had insisted he wear to their lunch meeting with the Penguins front-office suits. Jack flicks the gunk away as Bob levels him with a weighty look, hands braced in the air as if outlining a play and not offering a tour of a cobweb-filled dive.

“Here’s my thought,” Bob says. “The bar. It’s yours.”

Jack leans against the counter, taking some weight off his braced leg, and asks, “What’s mine?”

“This place,” Bob gestures around the room. “The whole building. It’s just sitting here, empty, the bar, the liquor license, there’s apartments and office space upstairs, we’d just need to do some renovations and —“

Jack can’t help himself. He barks a laugh and says, “I’m not moving to Pittsburgh.”

“How many times have you and I talked about opening a sports bar? I’d wanted to get this place fixed up so it’d be ready when you retired, but since the final — you could make it a gay bar, even, if you wanted!” Bob says quickly, offering another awkward olive branch. “A gay sports bar. I wouldn’t care.”

“A gay sports bar. In Pittsburgh,” Jack echoes, reaching for a chirp to defend himself, but he closes him mouth as he realizes a sports bar run by a Zimmermann might not be a terrible investment idea. “The building needs a ton of work,” Jack settles. “I just saw a rat.”

“That was a mouse,” Bob dismisses, not bothering to look at the rat still clearly in view. “Nothing that can’t be fixed. Got a dollar?”

Jack pats his pockets, finds a spare looney and hands it over. Bob doesn’t hesitate, pulling an envelope out of his back pocket to exchange for the coin.

“Congratulations. You are now the proud owner of,” Bob looks around helplessly. “I actually don’t know what they call this place now. A Bar?”

“I’m sure we’ll figure something out.” Jack swallows against the tightness in his throat, holding the deed carefully in his hands. “Thanks, Dad.”

Bob brings Jack in for a loose hug and they both ignore the soft squeaking coming from the backroom.

Five Years Later

There’s a man examining the announcement board in the vestibule, and Jack knows that posture: the forward hip cant, thick thighs, a small but definite bubble butt — guy’s a hockey player, and he has been for some time.

“Hey. Hi.”

Blondie spins around at Jack’s address. Not quite startled, but something close enough that Jack feels a twinge of guilt. “You interested in playing in our beer league? You look like you might know your way around a rink.”

The man quickly looks at his chest, as if expecting to find something displayed, but relaxes immediately. Jack fights a grin, he was once old hat at wandering into public spaces decked out in identifiable team merch.

“Bitty.” The man squares up to offer his hand; his accent is warm and distinctly southern, not at all what Jack was expecting. “You can call me Bitty.”

“Oh, with a nickname like that, you have to play, now, no excuses,” Jack gives Bitty’s arm a firm shake, surprised at how complementary his grip is; not just an overcompensating bro who’s walked into the wrong club.

“If only I had the time,” Bitty placates wryly. “Is this place new?”

“Been here a few years, but not long. How about you? Are you ‘new’? In town, I mean.”

“Moved for work,” Bitty’s smile is timid, eyes darting around the room looking for other patrons, up at the memorabilia and the various pennants. “First year. Slowly learning the area.”

Jack doesn’t miss the way Bitty’s eyes linger on the Pride flag draped from the second floor railing, but Bitty doesn’t mention it, and Jack isn’t in the business of prying.

“Let me be the first to welcome you to The Bar.”

“I saw that outside, do you not have a name?”

“We weren’t creative. The owner didn’t realize he was filling in the wrong line on the business license so we are literally called ‘The Bar’.”

“That’s actually pretty solid,” Bitty laughs, the sound lifting Jack’s mood easily. “I’ll have to make sure I come back and patron your establishment at a reasonable hour.”

“What you aren’t interested at getting sloshed before noon?”

Bitty laughs, and Jack is enough of an adult to recognize he’s got a tiny bit of a crush.

______

True to form, Bitty slowly becomes a feature of Jack’s early afternoons. The first few weeks, he does little more than quietly purchase a single domestic beer before tucking himself away in a corner booth, hunched over his phone, ball cap pulled low for discretion. Jack gives him space, and aside from a few curious regulars, Bitty is little more than another closeted young man seeking quiet sanctuary.

That is, until, hockey kicks up and Mario hooks Jack up with season tickets beside the bench. It’d taken time for Jack to get comfortable with being in an arena again, especially without the ability to step onto the ice himself, but he’s acclimated and learned to appreciate his new lot in life. He can be happy for his success and mourn the end of his career with equal measure.

(Doesn’t hurt he still gets asked for autographs on the regular.)

Bittle, the new forward traded out of Columbus, spins to whip the puck between Lundqvist’s thighs and the score is 3-2 with a minute left in the third. Jack stands to cheer with the crowd as Bittle’s pulled into a celly with his line mates, and the new angle gives Jack a good look at the man’s sunny face, complete with a familiar, bright smile and missing canine. Jack’s heart leaps into his throat when he realizes Bittle is ‘Bitty’, and Jack can’t help but cheer louder.

________

After the game, Jack does his homework. Pulls up stats pages and articles on Eric Bittle. Looking to link the quiet hottie from his bar with the energetic man he saw tonight on the ice. If Jack wasn’t in love before, he absolutely is after watching highlights from Bittle’s time in Columbus.

The next time Jack finds Bitty slipping into the bar, probably between practice and a good nap, Jack makes his move; filling a pint glass, wedging an orange slice on the rim, and adjusting his shirt before striding to the corner booth as easily as one can with a titanium femur.

“On the house,” Jack says, setting down the glass gently. “Choice goal, Tuesday. Great bounce.”

Bitty’s grateful smile falters, turning into something guarded.

“What goal?” Bitty asks, voice steady, and Jack’s immediately alerted to his misstep. Jack casts a careful eye around the room and doesn’t find anyone watching, kicking himself for not thinking this through. He’s used to playing this game with guys who aren’t quite comfortable, who might be visiting with the wrong people, but he hasn’t had to do the closeted-pro-athlete dance in a while.

“You know, I must have been mistaken.”

“Happens all the time. Very sweet of you, though.” Bitty apologizes and pushes away the beer, but Jack waves him off. It’s the least Jack can do for calling the guy out.

“I should have known,” Jack tries to recover. “You’ve still got all your chiclets. But, between you and me, Bittle’s a spitfire, eh? Crazy soft hands. I’d like to meet him someday.”

Jack whistles low, rapping his knuckles on the table before turning back to the bar, moving slowly enough he catches the way Bitty’s cheeks flare pink at the compliment.

About thirty minutes later, Jack, half focused on counting down the till, nearly misses Bitty’s exit. He looks up to offer a parting wave, and Bitty returns the gesture, flashing a shy, incomplete smile; one canine missing on the left side.

________

“Anything new to report? Sales look good, think you might be able to take some time off and visit your poor parents?”

Jack slides open a window to let some air into his bedroom, not for the first time wishing he’d taken the chance to tear out a wall and convert a corner of the top floor into a balcony. There’s still time — his father never seems to wary of giving Jack renovation loans — but Jack loves his condo and hates the idea of relocating again, even temporarily.

“New distillery opened, cut a deal on some local gin. We’re working on drink specials, if you have any ideas for names I’m open,” Jack eases onto the windowsill and looks down at the line of people waiting to get into the bar. “And I met someone. Think he might be a hockey player.”

“No shit? Beer-league?”

“NHL.” Jack corrects, an edge of caution in his tone he knows his father won’t misinterpret. “Started coming around a few months ago, gave me a fake name. Went to a game last week, scored right in front of me.”

“Well, you going to tell me who or am I going to have to guess?”

“He’s keeping to himself,” Jack holds the curtain steady to catch sight of a particularly flashy person in a glittering teal gown, texting Holster to snag a photo for the bar’s Instagram. “Don’t go hunting.”

“Well, if he needs any help you let me know.”

“What could you do?”

“I don’t know. Talk to . . . someone. I guess.”

“I’ll keep that under advisement.” Jack placates, smiling at the saucy photo Ransom texts back immediately of Holster lifting their favorite Drag Race runner-up above his head like something out of Dirty Dancing.

“So.”

“Mmm?”

“Does this mean you’ve got a little boyfriend, again?”

Jack leans out over the railing and tries to see if the universe has blessed him with a sighting of his favorite new Left Winger. Sadly, it’s Saturday evening and the Penguins are in Dallas, so no Eric tonight. 

“Working on it.” Jack offers, rapping his knuckles lightly against the window sill and trying not to think about the way Bittle’s face lights up when he sees that Jack is working. “Think I might really have a shot at something.”

“Well, you know what Wayne always says.”

“I do,” Jack breathes, pressing his forehead against the cool glass, taking in his one-of-a-kind view of the city. “I’ll let you know how it goes. Once he gets back.”

“ — You know, I’ve got the game on right now. I bet you $1000 I can tell who you’ve got the hots for. You have a specific type — ”

“Papa.”

“Okay, I won’t.”

“Thank you.”

“But it’s the kid we just got from the Blue Jackets, isn’t it. Bittle? You always like the fast ones — ”

“Goodnight, Papa.”

#bar au #jack zimmermann #NHL!Bitty #zimbits #Zimmermann #retired Jack #zimbits fic #look I wrote a thing #it's only been forever #my fic #my stuff #omgcp #check please

[boldlyanxious]

Pitch Woo

1. old-fashioned To court or seek the affection of someone through romantic gestures or overtures.

Jasonette July prompt 4: game on

Enemies to lovers if you squint

This was supposed to be a throw away prompt that I put no effort into but somehow I ended up putting a lot of energy into it. Please love it

Legal age drinking and questionable song choice

Jasonette July

My masterlist

"Okay and thank you for coming to our Karaoke face off. I'm DJ Carapace and I'll be running the show tonight."

He paused while the crowd cheered.

"For those who haven't been here before, long time patron Marinette has recently been butting heads with Jason who recently returned after a long absence."

Boos came from one section. He didn't recognize them as associated with either of the performers.

"None of that now. Here tonight we love all of our friends the same. The competition tonight is all about the performance. Also giving a performance is Dick back behind the bar. Show him some love and show him the money. Or your money maker. Shake your ass for him. He doesn't discriminate; he loves all asses."

Cheers went up as Dick did a few bottle tossing tricks before Carapace could continue on to explain the rules of the competition. Jason and Marinette start off with a duet chosen by Carapace. He mentioned that they would be singing multiple songs, some that they prepared for and others that would be a surprise before that started. At the end of the singing the voting would be opened up for everyone to choose the winner.

"Starting off with a little magic both singers will show us a Whole New World," Carapace said as he started the music.

"Are you ready for this, Princess? You aren't allowed to magically fall in love with me."

"That should be easy enough. I control all the magic here."

"Do you trust me?"

"Not at all, Street Rat." Marinette said into the mic before he started singing.

She would never admit to anyone how much she loved his voice. It was rich and smooth and he seemed to feel the music as he sang. She put everything she had into her part. This was one of the first songs she learned to sing in English so it was very nostalgic. They both had the same idea when the joined section came up. They turned to face each other and kept eye contact through the last note.

"Well they may be competing but they sound great together too. Next up Marinette chose the song Perfect."

It felt good to start off with a song she knew. Most of them tonight would be a surprise so it was good to start where she was confident. This song worked particularly well because it started soft and then got bolder as it went on. The words were very helpful too. Jason must feel the same way about singing his choice of It's My Life because he was nailing it. The crowd was cheering and Carapace played a Jagged song to give them a break and encourage people to get drinks.

"Alright, bringing us right back into the show Jason and Marinette are going to wow us with the song Senorita."

Both of them were sent shots and drinks during the break. Mostly Marinette wanted water but as the crowd ramped up she and Jason took a shot together for luck. Then Marinette saw the list of songs they were doing and drained her drink quickly. She needed the courage if they were going to put on a show. Putting on the best show is how she would get votes.

Jason didn't feel like he could keep up with her. Her song choices were stellar. He had always loved her range. He had wandered away to take a couple shots to loosen him up. Still when they met back at the stage they took one together before they looked at their set list. He felt a bit better watching her drain her drink after she saw the set list. Maybe it wouldn't be as easy for her as he thought. He allowed the energy of the crowd to flow into him. He could do this. As he watched her start the song, he suddenly remembered how he had actually been interested in Marinette when they first met, but she had gotten very frustrated over something to do with the song choice or order. He couldn’t remember now. It was the first in a long list of times they had butted heads here.

He moved to the beat of the song and started singing. He kept his voice low and sultry and his attention focused on his partner for the evening. He wasn’t sure exactly when it happened but the room and the crowd disappeared. It was just him and her looking at each other and singing. She shimmied around to the song and he reached out for her hand, spinning her until she was against him. He leaned over her shoulder and sang the ooh- la-la-la into her mic. He could feel her tense and suck in a breath before she sang her next section. He swayed her back and for and then spun her around. She did her oohs and then he dipped her down and then back up at the last notes of the song.

She was happy that it was his turn next, singing Fields of Gold. She had to catch her breath. She needed to convince herself that it was from the singing and dancing and not from being so close to him. She sipped on her drink and sat on the provided stool as he moved between singing for the audience and serenading her. As the song was at the final repeating line he pulled her back up and sang directly to her. He bent low and kissed her hand as he passed her the mic.

Marinette started singing the song Only Exception and as she did she circled him before guiding him to the stool. His performance was stellar so she needed to start strong and continue through the whole song. As he had she made sure to sing to the audience and not just him. She wandered down from the stage and near the tables to get the most visibility during the instrumental interlude. She sang the part that picked up right to the crowd before turning to him and walking back to him with determination at the ending lines. At the final line she got very close to him to sing directly at him that she was “on her way to believing”

Next they were singing Landslide as a duet. Marinette loved this one. But it was slightly bitter for her. The first time she met Jason she had put the song in but the old DJ XY said he would save it for her for later in the evening. Jason had arrived after that and when her song came up it was him singing it instead of her. He had done really well but the DJ didn’t like to do repeats so she didn’t get her chance to sing. It hadn’t helped that he had come up and used a terrible line on her and laughed at her reaction.

Jason loved this song. He knew she did it really well too. He had heard her sing it once before. It worked great as a duet for them. They were both able to showcase the best of themselves. Carapace was right, they did sound good together. They took turns with the parts and joined in together at the chorus. They addressed the crowd for the beginning of it but part way through she walked slowly up to him as she was singing. He put his mic to the side and met her in the middle. Something about sharing the mic made it feel more intimate. They were no longer looking out. They were looking right at each other. Her eyes closed during one part and he didn’t seem to be able to stop himself from reaching up and touching her face. She looked up at him as they sang the last line together, drawing it out.

Carapace gave them another break and played a couple other songs before he would call them back up. Alya was ready with a couple waters and people were basically lined up to buy them drinks and shots. Alya told her she was recording the whole thing and would be posting it after, linking back to both of them so they would probably get a lot more traffic on their pages soon. The break went quickly but Marinette was ready to be done with it. The songs were a little more upbeat so it would feel like it was going faster even though it was more songs. She laughed when she saw the first song. She knew Alya picked that one because she had told her how much she liked it but was always too nervous to sing it.

Marinette took another shot while bantering with Jason to get the crowd invested again at the end of the break. She didn’t hold back. She stalked towards Jason channelling all her sexy energy as she started singing Do Not Disturb. She didn’t turn back to the crowd at all. She moved with the song and sang with everything she had and based on the look on his face, he was eating it up. She dared approach him and slid her hand up his chest before seizing his shirt and pulling him to his feet. He moved right along with her. That is what made him a great opponent. He didn’t want to trip her up and win by default. He wanted her at her best and she felt the same. An even playing field so they could get a good gauge of a winner.

Jason could feel her almost groan when she heard the opening of Give Me Everything start. He had played along with her song and she went all out. Now it was his turn. He was pretty tame. Just serenading her and moving to the beat. He could tell she was expecting more though, she moved easily with him when they got to the line “grab somebody sexy tell them hey”. She was ready for it and matched him move for move. He liked it better this way. They may be competing but he was having a blast. He had the sudden thought when he sang the last line "we might not get tomorrow". He put the microphone under her chin and used it to tilt her face up to his. She stared right up at him perfectly. The natural move would be to lean down and kiss her but he didn't think it would be right complete the move.

"Okay guys get ready to vote after this last number here. Their grand finale and then we can go back to your regularly scheduled karaoke until we announce a winner."

Marinette and Jason both took drinks and readied themselves to sing. Jason started out the song Shallow. He didn't bother with the audience. The song was designed as a romantic duet and he loved watching her eyes widen slightly as she looked up at him. He dropped his hand when he finished but during her verse she moved up to him and places her hands on his chest. At the end of that verse she patted his chest before turning to the crowd for the bridge. They came back together to sing the chorus. Without thinking, they moved closer at the end. They were right next to each other and sharing a mic again. He pulled her close to his as the song ended and the crowd cheered. He turned off the mic before asking his next question.

"Are we gonna make the ending a show stopper?"

"I'm already doing that. Try to keep up."

She smirked at him. He spun her around and dipped her low. His face was right in front of hers as he whispered. She could feel his breath by her chin.

"The audience would love a finale. If you think you can handle it."

"I can handle anything you can. Game on." She said.

He was pulling her back to her feet out of the dip. Their eyes never strayed from each other's. As her feet touched the floor, she grasped his collar. He met her halfway pulling her against him. Their lips met as the crowd cheered again. It was meant to be a momentary thing. For the audience. They had both done it for show. But the surge they felt as they kissed was not just because of the crowd. They pulled back but felt the loss even as they stood in each other's arms under the shining lights.

DJ Carapace was announcing how to complete the voting but Marinette couldn't hear anything over the heartbeat thumping in her ears. Maybe Jason felt the same because he guided her back behind the makeshift curtain of the stage. He planted his back against the wall and pulled her flush against him. She didn't expect to crash against him so suddenly but she used the momentum to pull herself to him and resume kissing.

They could find out who won later.

Tags

@jasonette-july-event | @theymakeupfairies | @emjrabbitwolf | @vixen-uchiha | @trythisagainlove | @trippingovermyfeet | @tbehartoo | @adrestar | @zynna

#jasonette july 2021 #maribat #jasonette july #jasonette #enemies to lovers #rivals to lovers #boldlyanxious

[kmclaude]

Forgive me Father, I have no awful headcanons for you, only a general question on comic making. How do you do it, writing-wise/how do you decide what points go where, how do you plot it out (or do you have any resources on the writing aspect that you find useful?) Not to get too bogged down in details, but I attended a writer’s workshop and the author in residence suggested I transfer my wordy sci-fi WIP into graphic novel script, as it might work better. (I do draw, but I don’t know if I have it in me to draw a whole comic—characters in motion? Doing things? With backgrounds? How dare, why can’t everyone just stand around looking pretty)

I was interested but it quickly turned into a lot of internal screaming as I tried to figure out how to compress the hell out of it, since novels are free to do a lot more internal monologuing and such compared to a comic format (to say nothing of trying to write a script without seeing how the panels lay out—just for my own sake, I might have to do both concurrently.)

As an aside, to get a feel for graphic novels I was rereading 99RM and was reminded of how great it was—tightly plotted, intriguing, and anything to do with Ashmedai was just beautifully drawn. I need more Monsignor Tiefer and something something there are parallels between Jehan and Daniel in my head and I don’t know if they make sense but it works for me. (As an aside, I liked the emphasis on atonement being more than just the word sorry, but acknowledgment you did wrong and an attempt to remedy it—I don’t know why that spoke to me the way that it did.)

I thought Tumblr had a word count limit for asks but so far it has offered zero resistance, oh well. I don’t have much else to say but on the topic of 99RM, Adam getting under Monsignor’s skin is amazing, 10/10 (about the Pride picture earlier)

wow tumblr got rid of the markdown editor! or at least in asks which means the new editor probably has no markdown....god i hate this site! anyway...

Totally! So first, giant thank you for the compliments! Second, I have a few questions in turn for you before I dive into a sort of answer, since I can give some advice to your questions in general but it also sounds like you have a specific conundrum on your hands.

My questions to your specific situation are:

did the author give any reason for recommending a, in your words, "wordy" story be turned into a graphic novel?

is the story you're writing more, like you said, "internal monologuing"? action packed? where do the visuals come from?

do you WANT it to be a comic? furthermore, do you want it to be a comic you then must turn around and draw? or would you be interested in writing for comics as a comic writer to have your words turned into art?

With those questions in mind, let me jump into the questions you posed me!

Let me start with a confession...

I've said this before but let me say it again: Ninety-Nine Righteous Men was not originally a comic — it was a feature-length screenplay! And furthermore, it was written for a class so it got workshopped again and again to tighten the plot by a classroom of other nerds — so as kind as your compliments are, I'm giving credit where credit is due as that was not just a solo ship sailing on the sea. On top of that, it got adapted (by me) into a comic for my thesis, so my advisor also helped me make it translate or "read" well given I was director, actor, set designer, writer, editor, SFX guy, etc. all in one. And it was a huge help to have someone say "there is no way you can go blow by blow from script to comic: you need to make edits!" For instance, two scenes got compressed to simple dialogue overlaid on the splashpage of Ashmedai raping Caleb (with an insert panel of Adam and Daniel talking the next day.) What had been probably at least 5 pages became 1.

Additionally, I don't consider myself a strong plotter. That said, I found learning to write for film made the plotting process finally make some damn sense since the old plot diagram we all got taught in grammar school English never made sense as a reader and definitely made 0 sense as a writer — for me, for some reason, the breakdown of 25-50-25 (approx. 25 pages for act 1, 50 for act 2 split into 2 parts of 25 each, 25 pages for act 3) and the breaking down of the beats (the act turning points, the mid points, the low point) helped give me a structure that just "draw a mountain, rising action, climax is there, figure it out" never did. Maybe the plot diagram is visually too linear when stories have ebb and flow? I don't know. But it never clicked until screenwriting. So that's where I am coming from. YMMV.

I should also state that there's Official Ways To Write Comic Scripts to Be Drawn By An Artist (Especially If You Work For A Real Publisher As a Writer) and there's What Works For You/Your Team. I don't give a rat's ass about the former (and as an artist, I kind of hate panel by panel breakdowns like you see there) so I'm pretty much entirely writing on the latter here. I don't give a good god damn about official ways of doing anything: what works for you to get it done is what matters.

What Goes Where?

Like I said, 99RM was a screenplay so it follows, beat-wise, the 3-act screenplay structure (hell, it's probably more accurate to say it follows the act 1/act 2A/act 2B/act 3 structure.) So there was the story idea or concept that then got applied to those story beats associated with the structure, and from there came the Scene-by-scene Breakdown (or Expanded Scene Breakdown) which basically is an outline of beats broken down into individual scenes in short prose form so you get an overview of what happens, can see pacing, etc. In the resources at the end I put some links that give information on the whole story beat thing.

(As an aside: for all my short comics, I don't bother with all that, frankly. I usually have an image or a concept or a bit of writing — usually dialogue or monologue, sometimes a concrete scene — that I pick at and pick at in a little sketchbook, going back and forth between writing and thumbnail sketches of the page. Or I just go by the seat of my pants and bullshit my way through. Either or. Those in many ways are a bit more like poems, in my mind: they are images, they are snapshots, they are feelings that I'm capturing in a few panels. Think doing mental math rather than writing out geometric proofs, yanno?)

Personally, I tend to lean on dialogue as it comes easier for me (it's probably why I'm so drawn to screenwriting!) so for me, if I were to do another longform GN, I'd probably take my general "uhhhhhh I have an idea and some beats maybe so I guess this should happen this way?" outline and start breaking it down scene by scene (I tend to write down scenes or scene sketches in that "uhhhh?" outline anyway LOL) and then figure out basic dialogue and action beats — in short, I'd kind of do the work of writing a screenplay without necessarily going full screenplay format (though I did find the format gave me an idea of timing/pacing, as 1 page of formatted script is about equal to 1 minute of screentime, and gave me room to sketch thumbnails or make edits on the large margins!) If you're not a monologue/soliloque/dialogue/speech person and more an image and description person, you may lean more into visuals and scenes that cut to each other.

Either way this of course introduces the elephant in the panel: art! How do you choose what to draw?

The answer is, well, it depends! The freedom of comics is if you can imagine it, you can make it happen. You have the freedoms (and audio limitations) of a truly silent film with none of the physical limitations. Your words can move in real time with the images or they can be a narrative related to the scene or they could be nonsequitors entirely! The better question is how do you think? Do you need all the words and action written first before you break down the visuals? Do you need a panel by panel breakdown to be happy, or can you freewheel and translate from word and general outlines to thumbnails? What suits you? I really cannot answer this because I think when it comes to what goes where with regard to art, it's a bit of "how do you process visuals" and also a bit of "who's drawing this?" — effectively, who is the interpreter for the exact thing you are writing? Is it you or someone else? If it's you, would you benefit from a barebones script alongside thumbnailed paneling? Would you be served by a barebones script, then thumbnails, then a new script that includes panel and page breakdowns? What frees you up to do what you need to do to tell your story?

If I'm being honest, I don't necessarily worry about panels or what something will look like necessarily until I'm done writing. I may have an image that I clearly state needs to happen. I may even have a sequence of panels that I want to see and I do indeed sketch that out and make note of it in my script. But exactly how things will be laid out, paneled, situated? That could change up until I've sketched my final pencils in CSP (but I am writer and artist so admittedly I get that luxury.)

How do I compress from novel to comic?

Honest answer? You don't. Not really. You adapt from one to another. It's more a translation. Something that would take forever to write may take 1 page in a comic or may take a whole issue.

I'm going to pick on Victor Hugo. Victor Hugo spent a whole-ass book in Notre-Dame de Paris talking about a bird's eye view of Paris and other medieval architecture boring stuff, with I guess some foreshadowing with Montfaucon. Who cares. Not me. I like story. Anyway. When we translate that book to a movie any of the billion times someone's done that, we don't spend a billion years talking at length about medieval Paris. There's no great monologuing about the gibbet or whatever: you get to have some establishing shots, maybe a musical number, and then you move tf on. Because it's a movie, right? Your visuals are right there. We can see medieval Paris. We can see the cathedral. We can see the gibbet. We don't need a whole book: it's visually right there. Same with a comic: you may need many paragraphs to describe, say, a space station off of Sirius and one panel to show it.

On the flip side, you may take one line, maybe two, to say a character keyed in the special code to activate the holodeck; depending on the visual pacing, that could be a whole page of panels (are we trying to stretch time? slow it down? what are we emphasizing?) A character gives a sigh of relief — one line of text, yeah? That could be a frozen panel while a conversation continues on or that could be two (or more!) panels, similar to the direction [a beat] in screenwriting.

Sorry there's not a super easy answer there to the question of compression: it's a lot more of a tug, a push-pull, that depends on what you're conveying.

So Do I Have It In Me to Write & Draw a GN?

The only way you'll know is by doing. Scary, right? The thing is, you don't necessarily need to be an animation king or God's gift to background artists to draw a comic.

Hell, I hate backgrounds. I still remember sitting across from my friend who said "Claude you really need to draw an establishing exterior of the church at some point" and me being like "why do you hate me specifically" because drawing architecture? Again? I already drew the interior of the church altar ONCE, that should be enough, right? But I did draw an exterior of the church. Sorta. More like the top steeple. Enough to suggest what I needed to suggest to give the audience a better sense of place without me absolutely losing my gourd trying to render something out of my wheelhouse at the time.

And that's kinda the ticket, I think. Not everyone's a master draftsman. Not everyone has all the skills in every area. And regardless, from page one to page one hundred, your skills will improve. That's all part of it — and in the meantime, you should lean into your strengths and cheat where you can.

Do you need to lovingly render a background every single panel? Christ no! Does every little detail need to be drawn out? Sure if you want your hand to fall off. Cheat! Use Sketchup to build models! Use Blender to sculpt forms to paint over! Use CSP Assets for prebuilt models and brushes if you use CSP! Take photographs and manip them! Cheat! Do what you need to do to convey what you need to convey!

For instance, a tip/axiom/"rule" I've seen is one establishing shot per scene minimum and a corollary to that has been include a background once per page minimum as grounding (no we cannot all have eternal floating heads and characters in the void. Unless your comic is set in the void. In which case, you do you.) People ain't out here drawing hyper detailed backgrounds per each tiny panel. The people who DO do that are insane. Or stupid. Or both. Or have no deadline? Either way, someone's gonna have a repetitive stress injury... Save yourself the pain and the headache. Take shortcuts. Save your punches for the big K.O. moments.

Start small. Make an 8-page zine. Tell a beginning, a middle, an end in comic form. Bring a scene to life in a few pages. See what you're comfortable drawing and where you struggle. See where you can lean heavily into your comfort zones. Learn how to lean out of your comfort zone. Learn when it's worth it to do the latter.

Or start large. Technically my first finished comic (that wasn't "a dumb pencil thing I drew in elementary school" or "that 13 volume manga I outlined and only penciled, what, 7 pages of in sixth grade" or "random one page things I draw about my characters on throw up on the interwebz") was 99RM so what do I know. I'm just some guy on the internet.

(That's not self-deprecating, I literally am some guy on the internet talking about my path. A lot of this is gonna come down to you and what vibes with you.)

Resources on writing

Some of these are things that help me and some are things that I crowd-sourced from others. Some of these are going to be screenwriting based, some will be comic based.

Making Comics by Scott McCloud: I think everyone recommends this but I think it is a useful book if you're like "ahh!!! christ!! where do I start!!!???" It very much breaks down the elements of comics and the world they exist in and the principles involved, with the caveat that there are no rules! In fact, I need to re-read it.

Comic Book Design: I picked this up at B&N on a whim and in terms of just getting a bird's eye view of varied ways to tackle layout and paneling? It's such a great resource and reference! I personally recommend it as a way to really get a feel for what can be done.

the screenwriter's bible: this is a book that was used in my class. we also used another book that's escaping me but to be honest, I never read anything in school and that's why I'm so stupid. anyway, I'd say check it out if you want, especially if you start googling screenwriting stuff and it's like 20 billion pieces of advice that make 0 sense -- get the core advice from one place and then go from there.

Drawing Words & Writing Pictures: many people I know recommended this. I think I have it? It may be in storage. So frankly, I'd already read a bunch of books on comics before grabbing this that it kind of felt like a rehash. Which isn't shade on the authors — I personally was just a sort of "girl, I don't need comics 101!!!"

Invisible Ink: A Practical Guide to Building Stories that Resonate: this has been recommended so many times to me. I cannot personally speak on it but I can say I do trust those who rec'd it to me so I am passing it along

the story circle: this is pretty much the hero's journey. a useful way to think of journeys! a homie pretty much swears by it

a primer on beats: quick google search got me this that outlines storybeats

save the cat!: what the above refers to, this gives a more genre-specific breakdown. also wants to sell you on the software but you don't need that.

I hope this helps and please feel free to touch base with more info about your specific situation and hopefully I'll have more applicable answers.

#writing #making a graphic novel #writing a graphic novel #tutorial #writing tutorial

[cannibalisticskittles]

an act of kindness, ch. 16.5

pairing: unknown/reader notes: [16.5/16.5]. part one, part two, part three, part four, part five, part six, part seven, part eight, part nine, part ten, part eleven., part twelve, part thirteen, part fourteen, part fifteen, part sixteen, ao3 link. the theme for the epilogue :)

“You really think we’re ready for this?” you ask. You can’t keep the skepticism from your voice. 

Despite your trepidation, Saeran seems confident. “I think we can handle it.” 

“If you’re sure…” you sigh. It’s true that the two of you tackled vegetable stir fry like pros a few weeks ago, but this seems like a marked increase in difficulty. “Dumplings it is.”

He gives your hand a light squeeze. “It’ll be fine. Really.”

“Alright, alright, you’re probably right.” He’s not bad in the kitchen, and honestly, he picks things up pretty quick, he’s just inexperienced. But if he thinks you can handle it together… it’s worth a shot. You shake your head and look over the list of ingredients on your phone. “Do you want the left side, or the right?”

He considers the rows and rows of aisles that stretch before you. “Right,” he decides. 

“Alright. You’ve got vegetables, so that’s…”

“Carrots, onion, ginger, and cabbage,” he recites. 

“And if I’m starting from the left, I’ve got baking supplies, so… chocolate chips, brown sugar, flour…”

“We’ve got enough flour,” he says. 

“For dumplings and cookies?”

Saeran nods. “I checked before we left.”

“Alright, not flour, then,” you say. “Let’s see… pretty sure we’re good on soy sauce, but we definitely need more sesame oil.”

“That’ll be my section, won’t it?”

You nod. “Yeah. And… eggs and butter and milk will be in my section, so I’ll get those. What does that leave, are we missing anything?”

“Mmh…” he navigates to the recipes on his phone. “...I think we’ve got the ingredients covered, but didn’t we need a cookie scooper?”

“Oh, right.” You know you had one once, but you can’t find any trace of it. It may have been lost in the move. “That’s usually… in the middle of the store, I think. So whoever gets their things first will grab it.”

Saeran chuckles at that. “We’ll race for it?”

“I don’t think we have to do that,” you say, then grin. “…I'll be faster, anyway.”

“So it is a race.” Even with his mask on, you can tell he’s smiling by the way the corners of his eyes crinkle. 

You raise your hands. “If you’re that eager to lose to me, suit yourself.” 

Before he puts his phone down, he navigates away from the recipe pages, and —

“Is that another new picture of me?” you ask. 

“Hmm?” He glances down at his phone, the background of which does seem to be a photo of you that you’ve never seen before. “Oh. Yes,” he says, fondly.

He holds it up for you to see it better, and you squint at it for a moment. You think you recognize when this was taken, given what you’re wearing, but…

“God, I hadn’t even realized you took a picture of me that day,” you say. “Sneaky…”

He just laughs. At least it’s a picture you find semi-flattering this time. It isn’t always, though he says you look gorgeous no matter what.

“Okay,” you say, “we have our assignments, let’s go, go, go!”

And you hustle to the far side of the store in search of baking supplies as he hurries to the opposite end.

Separating in public still makes you nervous. You can’t help but think about what could happen if he was recognized. But… he’s not in more danger than before. So long as he takes the usual precautions and obscures his face somewhat with a hat and a mask, he should be fine. After all, while Saeran’s rat bastard of a father — blech — is still as murderous as ever, he has no new leads. 

Mint Eye’s trial is well underway and, as far as you can tell — and more importantly, as far as Saeran and Saeyoung, who are far more experienced in sussing out whether anyone’s heard whispers of their existence, can tell — Rika and V have not said a word about Saeran. And, crucially, though he’s been mentioned a few times in testimonies given by various former-disciples of Mint Eye, nobody knew his fucking name. 

So he’s assumed to be another victim that’s mysteriously and tragically disappeared. And with his hair and eye color both different from what they were at birth… well, the prime minister has no reason to pay attention to rumors of a mint-eyed, white-haired hacker. So if Rika and V never say anything about Saeran, there’s nothing to tie those rumors to his true identity.

You do sometimes wonder why they’ve said nothing. Penance, perhaps. For everything they’ve done. It’s not enough. But they owe him this, at least. The courtesy of not actively fucking him over.

Right. Chocolate chips, brown sugar, and — flour? No, wait, Saeran said you have enough. If he took the time to check, he’s probably right. You’ve got everything you need from this aisle, then. Move onto the next one.

Milk, eggs, and butter are equally easy to find. Another aisle done. You did think of everything, right? You’re pretty sure you’ve accounted for the ingredients you need for tonight, but is there anything else? What about tomorrow?

…ah, there is one thing you might still need. You pull out your phone and open up the messenger. 

‘hey, i think we’re almost out of that cereal you like,’ you send. ‘if you’re going to spend the night again, you might want to snag a box.’ 

‘You’re just trying to slow me down so you win,’ he sends back. 

‘i mean, if you don’t want the cereal… ’ you send, along with an emoji of yourself shrugging mischievously. 

His response is an emoji of himself looking exasperated. 

God, you can’t get enough of these. You love that he captured that pouty frown of his. It’s adorable. 

That feeling is only reinforced when he follows that up with ‘cheater’ and then another emoji of himself blowing a kiss to you. 

You send back the matching one of yourself. ‘love you, too. ’

…you suppose you could use more paper towels. That’s close to the center but still sort of out of the way, so if you go get that, that’ll even it out, right? Keep the not-a-race more fair?

As you make your way to the center of the store, you leave the messenger and check the latest news. What’s the big story of the day?

Something about the prime minister, it looks like. Rumors about some new unseemly business that he’s supposedly been tied to have cropped up once again. He denies it all, of course, but…

You watch the clip without sound. 

Even without hearing what he’s saying, he looks flustered. That matches what he’s looked like the last few times you’ve seen him. Stressed. Tired. Sweaty. Like the cracks are beginning to show in his careful façade. 

Good. 

Before long, you’ve made it to the aisle with paper towels, and you add them to your basket. Now for the cookie scooper. If you get there first, well… you won’t rub it in.

There’s so much information that Saeyoung was able to pull from the agency as it was crumbling, and so much of it is terribly, terribly damaging to the poor prime minister’s reputation. 

To hear Saeyoung talk about it, the few secrets he and Vanderwood have let slip — carefully, carefully — over the course of the past few months aren’t even the most damning bits of evidence. No, Saeyoung is saving that for when the man’s deniability is thoroughly on its last legs, to ensure he has no more defenders left to save him.

It is… thoroughly satisfying, you must admit. 

…though it is weird that when you turn on the television or check the news online, there’s a not-so-small chance that you’ll find something at least tangentially related to you. Not just the prime minister, but Mint Eye as well. You are consoled by the knowledge that so far, the news you have seen is good.

The walk isn’t long, and you find the cookie scooper quickly enough. If he’s got his things, then you’re all set to make tonight’s dinner together. Fried rice is hard to screw up, homemade dumplings might be a flop, and chocolate chip cookies… don’t go so well with the other two, but they’re pretty forgiving, and they’ll be good to snack on at movie night with Misun and Saeyoung tomorrow. It’s gearing up to be a nice date night. 

…lately you’ve had far more date nights than non-date nights, but… you can’t really find a problem with that.  

‘got the cookie scooper,’ you send. ‘i’ll meet you at the registers.’

Before you stow your phone, you take a minute to admire your background: a picture of you and Saeran, your arms slung around each other and grins on both your faces. You think it looks better than the candid pictures he takes, but… they make him happy, and you won’t deny him that.

It doesn’t take long to find each other. 

When you approach Saeran, he hands you his basket — and his keys. “Go ahead and check out. There’s one more thing I need to get, I’ll meet you in the car.”

“It should only take a minute to get through the line,” you say, “it’s not like we got much stuff. If you wait a minute, I can go with you.”

“No, you stay,” he says. “I’ll be quick.”

You start to protest, but he shakes his head. “Please. It’s a surprise. For you.”

“Oh… alright,” you say. “But be fast! …the milk will get gross if it warms up too much.”

“I’ll miss you too,” he teases. 

So you check out and make your way to the car. 

You get a notification as you load up the groceries in the back seat, and once you’ve settled into the passenger seat, you take a look at it. 

It’s a text from Misun. 

‘The date is officially set for the grand opening of Jaehee’s café!!! It’s next Thursday at 8:00AM!!!’

‘exciting! ’ you send back. ‘we’ll be there! ’ And then, after a moment, you add, ‘have fun on your date!’

With you and Saeran out, Misun and Saeyoung have the full run of his place. She’s too polite to ask you to clear out so they can have privacy, but you’re sure she appreciates the chance to spend some one-on-one time with her fiancé, and now that you’ve finally got a place of your own again, it’s easier to make that happen. You owe her for letting you crash at her place while you were apartment searching — and besides, Saeran definitely doesn’t mind spending the night with you.

‘We will! ’ she sends. ‘We’ll see you at the same time as last week? ’

‘yeah, i think so,’ you send. ‘i’ll let you know if we have to change the time around, but we should be good to go for 6:00.’

‘Great! See you then!’

You kick your feet up on the dashboard as you wait for Saeran.

He and Saeyoung, they’re… it’s… better, between them. Not perfect, of course. They’re a long way from that. But… better. Saeran is able to be around him now, most of the time. 

It’s not always comfortable. It can be tense. Awkward. And there are occasional steps back. Saeran can be… harsh, when old memories surface. Lashes out, sometimes. But… there has been growth.

They talk.

Sort of. 

It’s always… fairly shallow when you’re around. Surface-level. A comment here and there. A question or two. You know they talk some when you’re not there but you’re not sure how in-depth those conversations get. You can guess — sometimes he’ll mention that he talked with Saeyoung again, but doesn’t want to go into details… and then, a little later, he’ll start talking to you about his mother, or, more rarely, about Rika, and you assume that that’s connected — but you don’t want to pry. Saeyoung is his brother, and Saeran is an adult, and you don’t need to micromanage their relationship, especially when they’re moving at a pace that’s working for them. 

Hell, that first movie night, Saeyoung joked that it was a double date and Saeran only grumbled a little and you’re pretty sure you caught him smiling afterwards, ever-so-slightly. 

The letter-writing has helped, you think. 

Actual therapy is out of the question for now — still too risky, too hard to be anonymous, though after some gentle urging from you, Saeran’s been mulling over the idea of audio-only sessions in combination with a ridiculously secure VPN, along with other complicated methods of virtual protection that you honestly only sort of comprehend. So for now, he’s been trying out some… self-help techniques. Thus: letter-writing. 

He doesn’t send most of them. 

He writes some to you. Some he gives. They’re very romantic. But some, he keeps. 

The ones he writes to himself are more like… journaling. Writing down everything he remembers, and having those memories in one place. A record to look back on. 

You know he’s written some to his brother. You don’t think he’s given Saeyoung any of them, but you also don’t think he got rid of them. You aren’t sure if those are journaling, too, or if he intends to let Saeyoung read them eventually. 

He burns the ones he writes to his parents, and the one — singular — letter that you know he wrote V. 

And Rika… gets several letters. Unsent, of course; she’s currently involved in a high-profile criminal case and would most certainly have her mail checked before it’s given to her. But you’re pretty sure there are some that have not been burned. You… wonder if he holds onto them in the hope that one day she’d be able to read them. 

He still struggles with how to think about her. How to sort out the kind words and the praise and getting him free of his mother, from… everything else she did. Whether she believed any of the things he told him, and if it even matters. He might not ever get clear answers to his questions. You hope he can at least get some catharsis from writing his thoughts down. He deserves that.

…he’s really taking a while, huh?

As you’re about to text Saeran and ask where he is, he reappears, setting something you can’t see in the trunk before climbing into the driver's seat.

“What’d you get?” you ask as he settles in.

“It’s still a surprise,” he says. You make a face, and he huffs out a laugh. “You’ll see soon enough.”

“Fiiiiine,” you sigh, half-feigning being put out by this — and then you perk up as you remember the news you have for him. “Hey, Misun says there’s a date set for Jaehee’s café’s grand opening. 8:00 in the morning, next Thursday. I told her we’d be there. …you’re still cool with that, right? Because if you’ve changed your mind, that’s fine, no pressure.”

Saeran shakes his head. “I’ll go,” he says. “She invited me. Us. And it’s something to celebrate.” And then he smiles a little. “…I owe her a bouquet, anyway.”

“Oh, yeah!” you say. Misun was the one to figure out that the mysterious bouquet left in his room was, in fact, sent by Jaehee. On Jumin’s behalf, technically, but still. “That’s a great idea, we should totally get her one. …and speaking of celebrations, maybe we should get something for Vanderwood, too,” you add. “As a congrats-on-having-a-job-again gift.”

Their lack of employment and the void left by Jaehee’s departure coincided nicely; Vanderwood is set to take over for her in the coming weeks. Though you hear Jaehee may have had a few warnings for them before they accepted the offer.

“I’ll put in a double order at the florist’s,” Saeran says. 

As you leave behind bustling city streets and start to drive through less populous areas, he takes his hat off, though he leaves the mask on.

His roots are coming in. Red, stark against the white. 

They’ve been coming in for a while, actually, but that’s what happens when you don’t do anything to them for a few months. He bleached it once, a week or two after… the hubbub at Mint Eye, but only that once. You’ve wondered how intentional that was, but you haven’t asked him about it directly yet, though you’ve danced around it with quick little comments. It’s… hard to ignore, now, and you don’t think he’d mind much if you did ask, so… you do.

“...hey,” you say. “You planning to touch up those roots? Should we have grabbed a box set of bleach?”

Saeran glances at himself in the mirror. “...no,” he says, after some deliberation. “I… think I’m going to let it keep growing out.”

You think about what that means. The implications. The idea that sharing another trait with his brother no longer bothers him. 

“...I bet you’ll look good as a redhead,” you say. 

“What, do I not look good now?” His tone is teasing.

“Oh, you do! And you’d look good as anything, to be honest. You’re just plain hot.” He laughs at that. “Gonna have to rework your emojis if you’re gonna go full redhead, though.”

“Yeah…” he says. “But it won’t take too much effort.”

You imagine what that would look like. Cute, no doubt. And you continue towards home.

Your home, technically. Not his. But… well. You and he haven’t technically discussed moving in together — again — but it’s… sort of a foregone conclusion. 

Even though you signed the lease, what, a month ago? A month and a half? You still haven’t fully moved yourself in. There’s boxes everywhere. Though, thank god your old landlord took enough mercy on you to throw your shit in a storage unit after all that time you spent not paying rent. It’s not like you could while you were stuck in Mint Eye, but there’s no way your landlord could’ve known that. The storage unit fees were steep, but it’s better than having no shit to box. 

With you still settling in, Saeran hasn’t exactly moved himself in, either, but… he stays over often enough. To the point where he knows the contents of your cupboards decently well. And he’s got the essentials here. Pajamas, a few changes of clothes, a toothbrush… and it would be a lie to say that he didn’t have an influence on your search for a new place. Everything you looked at gained or lost points depending on how much you thought it might suit not just you but you and Saeran, together.

And he and Saeyoung got the whole place pretty well kitted out. Not anything as dramatic as the apartment’s special security system, but it’ll do the job in a pinch. Some kind of ‘lockdown mode,’ they said. Saeran couldn’t spend much time here if they hadn’t. Or… he could, but it wouldn’t be as safe. It’s still currently safer for him to spend most of his time off the grid, but… one day.  

It doesn’t take much longer to get to your place, which is also sort of his place, and soon you are pulling the groceries from the back seat and pointedly not asking about whatever surprise Saeran leaves in the trunk in favor of splitting the bags with you. 

As soon as you step inside and close the door behind you, he pulls his mask down and kisses you. 

You lean closer to continue the kiss, but he pulls back with a slight smirk and chides you, “now, now, we’ll have plenty of time for that later, I promise.”

“Tease,” you grumble, and he laughs. 

“First I have to impress you with my dumpling-making,” he says. 

“Welllll, technically, first we have to get these cold things put away. But I’m looking forward to seeing your prowess in the kitchen. Let’s get cracking, yeah?”

So you do. 

And it goes — well!

Fried rice is a breeze, of course. No trouble there. 

The dumplings… are a lot of effort. You both get tired halfway through filling and pinching the dough closed, so some of them come out a little lumpy and uneven. But they’re edible. And delicious. 

You know you should wait until the table is set and you’re able to sit down to eat, but… you snack, both of you. In fact, you end up eating so many dumplings in the course of prepping the ingredients for cookies that there are only a few left, and you might as well get the cookies started before you eat the rest. 

Cookie-making is, as predicted, a simple task — though it is made more complicated by the all-out flour war it devolves into. There’s no clear winner, given how thoroughly coated in flour you both are by the end. You’re inordinately proud of the perfect flour handprint you managed to leave across his ass, even if it did leave you very open for retaliation. Worth it. 

When you’re cleaned up and the cookies are in the oven, Saeran excuses himself to go outside for a few minutes. He returns carrying… a small, potted rosebush, partly in bloom.

“It wilted a little in the car,” he mutters as he closes the door behind him. “Poor thing.”

“Oh, it’s beautiful,” you say. Even slightly wilted, the rosebuds are a deep shade of red. 

“For you,” he says. “Or… for us. To grow together.” He looks a little bashful, suddenly. 

You smile at that, and come closer to run your fingers along the petals. “What’s the occasion? Is there an occasion?”

“It’s for our anniversary,” he says. He sets the pot down carefully on the kitchen table.

You frown a little as you do a mental tally of the time that’s passed. You know you haven’t hit the half-year mark yet; that’s still a while away. You’ve been planning for that. “I… think you’re a little off,” you say gently. “By almost two months, to be exact.”

He laughs. “Not that anniversary. …it’s the six month anniversary of the day we met.”

“Is it really ?” He nods. 

Huh. How did you not realize that? 

…well, no, actually, that’s not surprising. That day set a lot of things in motion, many of which turned out well in the end — like you and him, and the dissolution of a cult — but it was also the start of you being kidnapped into a cult, so you don’t look back on that particular memory all that fondly.  Not enough to mark it on your calendar, anyway. 

But you know he means well. And it’s not what it was at first that he’s celebrating, but instead, what it became. What you made it into. That’s why he remembered it, down to the day. 

So you drop a kiss on his forehead and say, “that is… so incredibly sweet, I don’t even know how to respond to that. That’s — Saeran, I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he responds immediately. 

You lean into him, affection blooming warmly in your chest. 

“…I’m going to up my game,” you promise. “Every time I think I’ve matched you in thoughtful gestures, you go and do something like this.” He loops an arm around your waist and gives you a squeeze. “Just you wait, I’m going to get you… something spectacular. Truly phenomenal.” 

Those plans for your anniversary? Yeah, you might have to rethink those. Or rather, you’ll need to zhuzh ‘em up. Bring out the big guns.

“You don’t have to,” Saeran says. “I didn’t get it so you’d owe me. You being here is enough.”

“I know you didn’t,” you say, “and it’s true that I’m quite a catch. But so are you, and you got me a rosebush!” You give him a gentle nudge. “I don’t have to, but I want to. I love you. It’s a… a positive feedback loop. You do something sweet, I do something sweet, you do something sweet, I do something sweet… and each time it inspires us to do more and more. It’s the best kind of cycle.”

He hums a short, contented note and places a kiss on the top of your head. “…hey.”

“Yeah?”

“We’re doing good,” he murmurs. “Aren’t we?

“We’re doing amazing," you assure him. 

“…love you.”

“Love you, too.”

From the kitchen, the timer goes off. 

“Ah, the cookies!” You wiggle yourself free of his embrace, which he pretends to fight for a moment before he relaxes his grip and releases you. “We’ve already eaten, like, a third of dinner—”

“Or half,” he says, amused.

“Maybe more like half, yeah,” you admit. “But if we start eating the rest now, we should be finished by time the cookies cool.  And then—” You gesture to the rosebush on the table. “—we’ll find a place for this to live.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Saeran says. 

“Good!” 

Together, you head into the kitchen. Saeran takes the oven mitts from the counter and hands them to you. You slip one of them on, then pause. 

“…if we’re both taking care of it, there’s no way we’ll kill it, right?”

Saeran snorts. “It’ll be fine. Don’t worry so much.”

And he’s been right once today already. You’ll put your trust in him. He’s earned that.

#saeran choi #saeran #saeran route fic tag #mystic messenger #an act of kindness #the end of an era.............