#some of u just need to get bitches

[conchstellations]

goodbye!

(tldr: kath is leaving because some of you kind of suck. she has some suggestions for those of you who don’t want to kind of suck. also a little bit of sentiment.)

This is my goodbye. The last post I’ll ever make on this blog. Dramatic, I know. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and I think it’s time I just fully absolve myself of the burden that the kazoo kid’s cold, dead eyes carry. I was thinking, “hey, isn’t it a little cringe to make a post saying goodbye to a tumblr blog?” and then I thought, “yeah! It is!” and I pulled up a google doc and started typing. In all seriousness, it’s been a long time coming. This is going to be a long post and I expect very few people to read it, although I hope you do. It’s mostly for me, really. Closure, I guess you could say. Perhaps even a poetic ending. 

When I first read Lord of the Flies, I was forced to. It was assigned reading for my grade 10 English class. I was going on vacation, so I decided to bring a copy of the book with me so I could keep up with the class. On that vacation, I probably read that book around 8 times. I couldn’t put it down. I couldn’t stop talking about it. My mom had to tell me to shut up about it after the fifth time I explained to her how Jack would’ve been a much more efficient leader. 

As any teenage girl with an urge to rant about niche topics would do, I made a tumblr. At that time, it was inquisitivebrightcreatures, but I cannot stress enough how annoying it was to type. 26 whole characters. Literally enough letters for the entire alphabet. I also made a discord server around that time, and I personally think that led to every major issue I’ve had in the past 2 years (that’s a joke, my grandpa died and he didn’t even know what discord was). On that server, I made friends I still talk to even now. Shoutout to Bunny and Rog, my besties.

Months went by, I made friends and I found a community. I also made enemies. I didn’t know that a book written like a thousand years ago could generate so much anger, but I guess that’s what I deserve for underestimating literature. 

Lord of the Flies has been a huge part of my life for the past 2 (almost 3) years. It’s even partially to blame for my current relationship. When I first walked into my grade 12 English class, I distinctly remember seeing Lord of the Flies books on the desks and turning to the complete stranger sitting in the row to the right two seats behind. I proceeded to continue on at least a five minute rant about the joy this stupid book has brought me, and then my hopes were crushed as it was announced that those were for the grade 10s. She still bought a copy for herself though, to appease me, and she even bought one for me so I could annotate it. Now, she’s annotating one for me. Okay, I’m done being gay. Maybe. (I’m not). 

To put it simply, this book genuinely means a lot to me. It’s been a comfort to me when I needed it most. I used to have this book with me 24/7 about a year ago. Trust me, I love it. 

But the one thing I’ve realized I don’t love is what drew me here in the first place: the community. 

I don’t want this to be taken in the wrong way. I have formed very real, very meaningful bonds with people in this community. For two years of my life, the people here were who I would go to with every single issue I had. They were almost like a second family. But I don’t think that means this community is above critique, and I want to talk about that and my thoughts. 

For a while, I held my tongue when it came to the problems in this “fandom”, or whatever you want to call it. I wanted to fit in, and I thought that maybe I just wasn’t understanding other people’s perspectives. Maybe everyone else was actually right. And I certainly know that I was part of the problem too. I’ve done some things I seriously, genuinely regret. I know I’ve had my moments that make this whole thing sound hypocritical, but I think those experiences helped me understand why this behaviour is wrong.

Firstly, I’ve always been disgusted by the way some of you handle these characters. They are children. Even if you’re aging them up, they were written as children. Stop making NSFW. You’re just aging them up to “justify” your actions. Just because it’s “legal” doesn’t mean it’s moral! It is horrific. That’s all I have to say about that, because I don’t even think it should be a topic of debate.

Secondly, the “mob-mentality” needs to stop. I think it’s funny how part of Lord of the Flies is critiquing how humans are able to do bad things when other people are doing it, and on multiple occasions I’ve seen dozens of people in this community attack somebody. Of course, I think that sometimes it’s mandatory to correct people. If someone is genuinely harming other people with their actions, a little bullying is perfectly fine by me. But some of you are frothing at the mouth because someone in the Lord of the Flies tag on tumblr said that they don’t support shipping. There’s no need to send hundreds of insults over petty things. At that point, it’s just insecurity. Next time you start typing, maybe consider: why am I getting this upset? Is it worth getting upset over? I sound rude, but I truly think this is a problem that the community has, and I'd love to see some self-reflection and improvement. 

Thirdly, some of you are just genuinely toxic. The amount of hypocrisy, cruelty, and to put it simply, meanness (is that a word?) is worrying. Again, I can say confidently I’ve done the exact same thing. I’m not trying to be rude. But I know I’ve taken the time to try and work through those flaws. I think a lot of you can’t even acknowledge them. You’re all so focused on pointing out other people’s issues that you can’t see how you could possibly be in the wrong. And when you are in the wrong, you get defensive. And then comes the group harassment. From the bottom of my heart, I think a lot of you need some serious introspection. 

It’s taken me a long time to think about this. I do love this blog. I love some of the people I’ve met. I love some of the memories. But I cannot continue to be a part of this with a good conscience. The tipping point for me is when I logged into this blog the other day, and saw that every single one of the above patterns was being repeated. Again. And again. And again. (I do feel some of the critique was very valid, but others? Not in the slightest). And once again, there was zero self awareness to be seen. This community is not one I want to participate in, or support, if it keeps going in this direction. And I really hope that at least some of you will turn it in another direction.

I’m not deleting this blog. It holds so many memories for me. Just leaving it inactive for the far, foreseeable future. And again, I love this book! It will forever be my favourite. I already have another blog where I’ll probably post a few Lord of the Flies things! That book has been a safe place for me, but the community that’s grown here is anything but that.

I hope some of you took the time to read through this, and understand where I’m coming from. If any of you have something to say, comment or message me or whatever. I’m open to discussing because I do want people to listen before I actually go.

In conclusion, goodbye to all my friends I’ve separated from. Goodbye to the memories I’ve made here. Goodbye to conchstellations.

I’m not going to play any longer. Not with you. (Okay, sorry I had to.)

- Kathryn <3

#i honestly had a good time with some of you #and i consider some of you friends #but at least 20 of you have proven to me over time that youre not who i thought you were #and i just want it over with LMAO #im moving on with life #my girlfriend brings me weekly bouquets i dont need lord of the flies tumblr drama #some of u just need to get bitches #okay sorry sorry but i think im funny #anyways #loved all the good times #despised all the bad times #xoxo conchstellations #lord of the flies #lotf #lotf fandom

[zhuhongs]

I have a feeling I’m going to get ratio’d on my own poll given that tumblr consists of like. mostly white people but anyways! 

ALSO PLEASE ADD YOUR ETHNICITY IF U RB

#the correct belizean answer is you dont put it away. or you do if u purposely cooked a lot #bc like if it aint hot as fuck it will not spoil!!! i have leaft meat out for days! my friends came at me for this when we cooked on a trip #and i didn't put the chicken in the fridge and left it on the stove overnight like!! bitch!!! #it was 40 degres out #ofc i dont need to put it in the fridge. and before yall quote food safety at me. they advise u not to wash ur chicken #i dont listen to them. i lsten to my superior stomach and the fact that i've only had food poisoning once in my life and that was from a #vendor that did tell us to be careful #so!!! #and my friends were fine #some of them got sick from smth ANOTHER friend cooked that i thought looked unsafe for other reasons #so!! #actually wait the answer for me is depends on what. bc i'll leave rice out longer than i'd leave fish or tuna. or veggies #but veggies is just bc it gets bitter when its left out

[yardsards]

when characters have poofy messy but otherwise straight hair, i like to headcanon that their hair is actually naturally wavy/curly and they just don't know how to/don't care to take proper care of it. bc irl that is often the case (speaking from personal experience)

#eliot posts #*looks back at my younger self who didn't know their hair was wavy just thought it was Bad* #i was fuckin. walking around with hair poofed up like a mix between a founding father and a startled cat #and with a halo of frizz at all times #older relatives would call it nappy or ratty and suggest i cut it off or get a relaxer treatment done on it #(sidenote a bit ago i learned that apparently ''nappy'' is usually a racialized term tho i myself am white) #fascinating that they knew that straightening treatments would ''fix'' my hair but did not actually know my hair was wavy #i wore my hair real long back then too so it was constantly tangled lol #memories of being a kid and my dad having to basically corner me to brush my hair in the morning before school #my mother would bitch about my hair being too long when i was a kid and sometimes TRICK ME into getting it cut shoulder length #but then when i was an older teen and wanted it cut real short she FORBADE ME from going any shorter than a bob??? #so i just left it super long til i moved out and then chopped it all off and sold it to a wigmaker for a $300 profit lmao #now that it's short tho the wave pattern is very minimal #part bc of the way i style it part bc it's just a 2b wave pattern so you need a bit of length before the waves start getting really defined #anyway like. looks at catra and eda. let me get u some good conditioner and a wide toothed comb bby

[roseworth]

the only people that say that comic books arent hard to get into are the people that have been reading them since they were a kid. and the only people that say that comic books are too hard to get into so you shouldnt try are the people that have never bothered opening a comic book.

#as a bitch that got into them like 2 years ago. its fuckin hard #especially if you dont like not knowing things #however its not as hard as some people want u to believe #like one of the first books i read was batgirl 2000. fantastic entry book #first of all its amazing second of all you dont really need a lot of prior knowledge to understand it #but even then. it gets confusing. #since i didnt know a lot about other big events i didnt know what was going on in any crossovers #like ok um why is bruce wayne being convicted of murder rn. #like when i was getting into comics i had wikipedia open for like half the comics i read #i think the hardest part is finding a starting place #then continuing to expand from there. like there’s so much and it’s HARD #and sometimes saying ‘just use a reading guide for a character you find interesting’ um. does not work #my rose reading guide is my baby but it is NOT a good starting point for people that haven’t read comics #anyways i’m sorry this is not meant as a slight to anyone #i just love to give my two cents all the time

[hoffmanstits-enjoyer]

never shutting up about william's 'you showed him, babe' look when zeke's at the church dialogue with his cunty 'more than you'; my man was staring at dunleavy all smug like 'see you in the murder trap, bitch'

#they're it for me your honor #need me a cop show of them; emphasis on the homoerotic subtext #just these two bitches being hated by every other cop. for being clean AND bc william will fuck u UP if u say shit to zeke #he never gets caught for it but he's so impossibly smug abt it. zeke has no idea #poor zeke thinks william's the less violent of them two cause he lets zeke do the bad cop routine and has enabled some fights. cute. #zeke: babe hold my fucking sunglasses #william: beat his ass babe i got yo sunglasses *mentally crafting up some sneaky twisted payback that will traumatize that random cop* #william schenk #ezekiel banks #spiralshipping #spiral from the book of saw #spiralposting #sawposting

[sweetshire]

So, @silv-paru sent Sherlock Holmes for the character opinion bingo. thanks a bunch for this (and for your patience. my god, i’m answering this a week late. typical me behaviour). you’re a darling :D

Did you know, i used to tell these stories to my friends? they delighted in them AND i got a chance to sort of ramble on and on abt him and watson. it was a win-win, really. ah, those were the days! now i haven’t reblogged much of him this month at all. i miss him. I MISS HIM.

Onto the bingo: well. he’s The quintessence of gender™ to me. and i relate to him so so much. fav character of all time fr. i want to carry him in my pocket at all times & study him. like. do i want to BE him OR am i IN LOVE with him, ykwim? pssh who knows? certainly not me. uh-huh ‘a beast unleashed’ -does this refer to me or him? you choose. oh re: canon, i’m ignoring the part where holmes dies (or y’know, is dead for 3 years). that’s too angsty.

#sherlock holmes #my dearest blorbo #he’s my belovedest chewtoy basically #if i think abt how modern adaptations *looking at you bbc sherlock* have ruined his character i get so angry i have to take deep breaths #*mutters darkly* he is NOT an arrogant cold-hearted bitch like he’s portrayed; well he IS a bitch but not a cold-hearted one!! #see. the thing abt holmes is that he’s SUCH a sweet boy okay. and he’s compassionate #he cares sooo much. that’s the reason people come to him when they’re distressed. they trust him #he hates the police. he is a jester at heart. loves his watson #he’s here to help the truly desparate helpless people even if they have no money to pay him for the case. no questions asked. But- #he fucking despises obnoxious rich men. the first time he meets watson a total stranger he *very excitedly* tells him abt his experiment #it’s very adorable. he never stops trying to impress ever. infact blushes furiously when complimented by him #my guy has 0 knowledge of our solar system but he’s written several monographs abt different types of ASHES. go figure! #OH i almost forgot the most important fact he’s special to me bc holmes is an audhd gay disaster bastard. sometimes he’s even bisexual #but mostly he’s acespec and in a qpr w watson. he’s VERY adhd. behaves like an excited cat and oh so cute when he stims. everytime he does #i go SQUEEE. when he’s depressed it’s a goddamn hashtag big mood. as in many other ways he is me i am him #he’s PASSIONATE and KIND that’s all you need to know #acd stories are about just some guy who loves his job (which he invented himself btw after quitting college) that’s it #i am overcome with an almighty need to squeeze his cheeks #he’s everything to me <3 #alright if i don’t stop now i doubt i ever will LMAO bye #acd holmes #if u read till the end u get a cookie and a kiss on the nose i love u

[eff-plays]

Came up with an idea for a scene in my fic and I'm trying to find a balance between letting Astarion show the same sort of care and emotional maturity for Hira that he shows for a Durge character without making it too twee and OOC 🤔

#bg3 #i think i'm gonna have hira die and get resurrected but everyone's out of spell slots for the end of the day #so they have to sleep it off #and they fall asleep in his arms cuz they're still like half-dead #and he just kinda sits there like when u have a cat in ur lap and u need to go somewhere #like uuugh wtf get off bro ... but also aw ... baby ... #he's like shaking with ... rage? confusion? just absolutely not having it but also having it very much #worsties to lovers #eventually he extracts himself and has to go sit and stare pissily into the campfire #getting so so so mad at hira for 1) daring to die and 2) being such a weak little bitch and 3) trusting him too much #'they're so stupid i hate them so much oml how dare they fall asleep in my arms like some fucking idiot omg' #bro ... ur the idiot<3

[frecklystars]

god im so excited for the Barbie movie today. I might be a bit tense while seeing my triggers on screen but honestly I’ve been doing so so so well handling my ptsd the last few weeks and I'm very proud of myself!!!!!

there’s a few triggers I’ve been actively working on reclaiming and I KNOW I’m going to be okay watching the movie bc I am not letting anybody take this from me. I know I’m gonna wanna see it more than once. I even bought myself a cute pink skirt for it ;w;

#I’m gonna wear pink glitter in my hair too for opening night #woof #like i know im gonna be rly tense but i have been doing SO much better than i was just a month ago #if anything ill just be incredibly tense at first. but i genuinely think ill relax more as the movie progresses #bc ive been using grounding techniques for months and ive been working so goddamn hard to reclaim pink #WHICH IS SUCH HUGE PROGRESS FOR ME to think back to january when i couldnt look at pink at ALL #and i think seeing pink literally every single second for 2 hours straight in the barbie movie #is gonna also help my brain be like 'oh hey everything is fine' help it to become desensitized #bc ive been doing exposure therapy and im doing so much better than i was even just one month ago!!!!!!! #barbie is my girlfriend. and ken is my boyfriend. and i have two hands they can hold #god!!! you know how many barbies im gonna kiss!!!!! SO MANY #this is MY movie i have been so fucking excited to see!! its my number one favorite thing ive been looking forward to!!!! #i have wanted to see this! so! fucking! badly! and fuck anybody who tried to ruin that for me #i dont want ptsd to control my life #i feel like im riding a bull and gripping it by the horns while its trying to kick me off while im yelling Not Today Bitch #thats what trying to reclaim triggers feels like #but i can fucking feel it working i can feel myself getting better with some of these triggers i cant believe it #and i think just a year from now most of these triggers wont be severe anymore #which is my goal. i dont even need them to be cured completely i just want to function normally #cannot tell u how fucking unreal it is to have so many triggers that are like. normal everyday stuff #colors. clothes. phrases. transformers. im taking ALL of that shit back #STARTING WITH PINK ONE OF MY FAVORITE GODDAMN COLORS 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 #THE EMOJI LOOKS RED ON DESKTOP BUT THAT IS OKAY.

[theparadoxart]

Alimony or spousal support is so stupid and dont even get me started why.

Like are you telling me I gotta pay at least half my earnings/belongings or more to my partner just coz I earn more? and for what 10-20 years?? till they get remarried or die??? Like wtf I'm not their parent! If you're an adult, which I guess u are coz u decided to marry someone, then you sure as hell can work at ur age smh and get up on ur feet! Why do I gotta give my money just so u can live "THE LIFE"??

What exactly is "equal rights" about this? And I could scream a lot more about how men are mostly the target of all this(coz they usually earn more) and smh no women says "I'm independent, I dont need no money" then, aint no way feminism is sacrificed in this right?? I could say a lot but u get my point.

ALIMONY IS A JOKE!! and anyone who thinks otherwise is just a greedy person who is lazy to earn money themselves!

#and dont get me started on these female celebrities and HOW MUCH they ask in spousal support #like bitch u earn millions of dollars anyways #what u need that money for!?? #and yes there could be some exceptions like u both have a company or something together or u wanna help them out of kindness #but at this point people are just using the law in their own favour #and ive seen so many fucked up cases bout it #honestly this is one of the biggest things that tick me off regarding marriage #alimony #my thoughts #mine

[saetoru]

Wait what happened on tik tok? /gen

nsfjshf it’s nothing serious it’s just some drama going around that everyone’s talking about and i luv drama so i wanted to ask ppl on here if they seen it so we could all gossip ab it

anywayyyy the gist is that there’s this rly big makeup content creator who has her own brand and everything and she stitched this smaller poc’s video of how she does her makeup and was rly condescending about how she “used too much product” even tho she dm’d the girl and was like “i love ur video and was hoping i could repost it” and the creator said yes thinking it would be a positive review from the way she worded it. ANYWAY it’s just a bit wild bc the big creator literally did this challenge where she tried this white blonde creator’s makeup technique where she like uses deadass half the bottle of foundation and she was complimenting the technique and how it was flawless on the girl etc and yea the double standard has everyone mad rightfully

#and before anyone starts #‘it’s not that deep not everything is about race’ #it is tho. #poc content creators get a fraction of the opportunities and support and overall space in social media #but on top of that #they always get criticized for things white people are able to turn into their brands #that white girl’s entire brand on her page is being known as the girl that wears half a bottle of foundation and makes it work #she grew millions of followers like that #and then a lil tiny page of a poc minding her business and putting on some color corrector that’s ‘too much’ is the one she decides #needs to be criticized #W I L D #anywayssss rant over LMAO i just hate bitches that mess w sweet poc that mind their business #i will pound u

[hershey-the-person]

i have two moods :😔 crippling depression and anxiety making it hard to stay alive 😔

and ✨️pop icon in the bathroom✨️

#honestly i think im funny when i want to be with the people i want it to be #and honestly not many people get to see that side cuz it just takes away from this mysterious and quiet persona i have #but once i let u in baby the jokes never stopping #well they stop when im having an existential crisis but lets not count thay #actually i make jokes even when i feel like dying lmao #so um yeah #i wish i had friends whom i could make jokes with #but the problem is people dont understand my humor cuz they dont about the topic im talking about #but like here on tumblr say if i make jokes about some character people do get it #my fandoms dont match with otherss irl #actually most of my irl friends are not into any actual fandoms 💀 #given i dont have many irl #people whom i actually talk to ? not more than 2-3 id say #i do have more friends but like i dont TALK talk with them iykwim #and tbh i dont really need too many friends im fine with what i have cuz thats amazing #more people u let in = higher chance of becoming toxic + more heartbreak + more energy drainage + start losing urself to please others + #more back bitching + bejng asked to give more explanation when u have ur kms times and u disappear for a while #and when u dont explain they get mad or u get tired and just cut them off #lmao im rambling all my problems in just one post oops

[ruffgem]

group work is Not It. I should have known better than to enroll in an engagement course that involves planning workshops with a group of other students……. guess who is doing all the work! :^) Back in tha day my teachers called me a ‘natural leader’… fun fact!!!! I am actually not! I do not like being in charge! it is actually just that people take advantage of me! Hope this helps

#God. I wanted to take the class so bad bc it’s about the history of art in prison systems #and it involves a weekly art workshop in a prison #the group that runs it is pretty blatantly abolitionist and partially run by formerly incarcerated ppl #so it’s made pretty clear that we're not ‘teaching’ art bc thats weird and enforcing a hierarchy if ur a 'teacher' #its more like a way to get materials inside and basically hang out with and make art alongside incarcerated ppl #under the guise of ‘volunteering’ as the dept of corrections labels it #anyway that’s all off topic but basically I am doing all the fucking work lmao we’re supposed to go in for the first time tomorrow and #my group members suck shit at communicating and the person who’s supposed to drive is like radio silent whenever I ask #where we should meet and shit #FUCK!!! I hate logistical shit like this #its taken us a million years to get cleared by the system (on purpose i stg) so its literally midterm time and we havent gotten in yet #i swear if our first one gets jeopardized by this girl who refuses to check her damn texts or emails or even come to class im gonna be so #pissed. lmfao #goddddd this is giving me flashbacks to when i took the class where we were supposed to do workshops at an elementary school #different vibe because in that scenario it was definitely supposed to be educational and we lowkey were 'teachers' #but my classmates also didnt do shit and i also ended up doing literally everything #WHY TAKE A CLASS LIKE THIS IF U DONT WANNA DO IT LIKE SERIOUS QUESTION #maybe they just want to put it on their resume LOL #they need a vetting process for this class i stg like interview these bitches before they enroll #cuz some of these people fr do not care

[suavis]

i wish everyone feeling relieved about the wilds getting cancelled or saying it deserved to be after season two a very die ❤️

#YALL DID THIS #even if it wasnt a perfect show at least it was there but yall (esp twitter fans) couldnt stop bitching abt the boys #i didnt want them at first either but jesus they were never gonna be the main focus they just needed screentime to be introduced #and s3 was gonna be all of their seasons. and we'll never know if it couldve been good or not </3 #i am. so bitter abt this like lmao just skip the boys scenes if u hate them so much bc shitting on good shows that have some flaws is only #gonna get them cancelled. they're not going to change its just going to stop altogether #like we're never going to get to see where the show was going. no satisfying conclusion just this goddamn cliffhanger #the wilds #mine

[nygleskas]

🧭..!!!

#i like him. hehe. #.txt #his sickeningly nervous puppydog behavior has captivated me #<- things that can also be said for greg #me when i watch a drama show and immediately fall in love w guy with black hair who's constantly nervous and who overworks himself #and who's sooo pathetic and who also. well. puked everywhere in the first episode. 🧭 is greg if he existed in the 40s and was 5'7 #also they have giant baby cow eyes #i need to bring them coffee as they work and massage their shoulders bc they're always stressed out adn also tuck them into bed. #these bitches need some comfort. they never get any #let me provide that for u ...boy. #their comfort my number 1 priority actually. idc abt myself i just want them Alright #<- well in **** the comfort of Everyone Else comes before my own comfort bc i'm in the medical field lol #ok i'm shutting up no one cares for random vague lore rambling #🧭

[daydadahlias]

IS 5SOS GOING ON HIATUS?!?!

so I don’t know if u know this or not but Michael Clifford is actually having a whole ass human baby and babies tend to need a wee bit of attention and care.

5sos have also been touring for two years now and they also always take breaks for a couple years when writing their new albums (see their last three albums) so, sure, call it a hiatus if u want ig. But the truth of the matter is that it’s just the same formula the band has always followed. And idk why people are suddenly panicking and acting like it’s a new development

#this ask bothered me ahdjjsjs #why r u yelling #also where have u been #this has been all anyone’s talked abt for months which is also fucking annoying #like the band is genuinely just doing what they’ve always done #and also Michael is having a child #he might wanna spend some time with it #yeah don’t talk to me abt a 5sos hiatus bc y’all just don’t seem to understand what it actually is ahdjjss #like they’re just. doing what they have done before #so idk why people are being bitch babies about it #sorry not so much directed at you anon as the absolute morons on twitter and TikTok #the bands fine. they’ve literally said they’re working on a new album and they obviously need breaks between tours #so idk why people are acting like it’s the end of the Fucking world #get over yourself is basically what I’m saying #pigeon #anon

[lovevalley45]

so i might have to finally go to my RA abt my roommate and it makes me feel like such a bitch but like. is it really worse than wanting to throw smth at her

like it’s gotten to the point where i have to wear earbuds to bed because she talks so loud. keep in mind this isn’t even who i share am actual room with, and i can hear her. i’m at my breaking point

#alli says shit #it’s like i can’t keep complaining and doing nothing abt it #n i know that’s what an RA is for but it makes me feel. small #like i’ve been trying to be the bigger person this semester and it’s not working #it just makes me even more angry #i might ask my mom what to say bc she was an RA #but damn #it’s fucking wild #it just feels terrible! #if she was a bitch maybe it’d be easier but she’s nice #she just also drives me insane #idk i just need to get it off my chest #i think i’m just worried it’ll also all blow back on me and then she’ll hate ME #even though i’m just like. i wanna sleep. i want to not have to have my earbuds at full blast to get some peace #i want u to clean ur goddamn desk n stop making it everyone else’s problems ants got into ur snacks #it’s just. killing me #like i forgave the roommate who got me sick faster