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#Secret Agent Bucky
pearlparty · 2 months
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what would you ask the cast of MotA?
I have a connection (which shall remain unexplained) who will have an opportunity to attend a MotA early-screening/Q&A soon, and he has very few questions prepared (silly boys amiright?). And I told him he had to prep something just in case (mostly so I can live vicariously through him). Anyway it got me thinking and I wanna ask the other MotA enthusiasts on the interwebs. so, whatcha got?
(gonna tag a couple of off-the-top-of-my-head my fellow MotA enthusiasts to get a convo goin but pass this along fr: @precious-little-scoundrel, @girlnairb, @steph-speaks, @blurredcolour, @avonne-writes)
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burninblood · 1 year
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working on some character design for my YA work portfolio right now and inspired by Winter Soldier: Cold Front I decided to do 16 yo, but totally already 17 yo, and maybe also totally 25 yo, “agent Bucky” with a foot in a bucket.
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agentxthirteen · 5 months
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On this day (November 23) in Sharon Carter history, Sharon appeared in:
Captain America V5 #12 (2005)
Secret Avengers #19 (2011)
Secret Avengers #19 [Variant] (2011)
Marvel Heroes Flip Magazine #6 (Reprint Captain America V5 #6) (2005)
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caffiend-queen · 2 years
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I was re-reading ‘Are you SURE you’ve done this before?’, laughing (ok, more like cackling) at Lila’s misadventures in the wilderness and daydreaming about James Barnes saving damsels in distress, no matter how insufferable they may be, when ‘Nobody does it better’ by Carly Simon came up on my playlist. All I could think about for the better part of the day was Bucky carrying his ‘mission’ out of the bad guys’ lair - said bad guys momentarily incapacitated - in slow motion, looking down at the woman in his arms with affection (and a cheeky glint) in his eyes. *sigh* Secret agent Bucky on a rescue mission is a perfect dream. 
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My darling Sylvie, thank you!!!! Secret Agent Bucky should be a thing. I mean, REALLY.
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candied-marlboro · 2 years
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bucky barnes’ book list
“Catch-22” Joseph Heller
“Mother Night” Kurt Vonnegut
“The Quiet American” Graham Greene
“Our Man in Havana” Graham Greene
“Without Conscience: The Disturbing World of the Psychopaths Among Us” Robert D. Hare
“The Stranger” Albert Camus
“The Psychopath Test” Jon Ronson
“Blood on Snow” Jo Nesbø
“Norwegian Wood” Haruki Murakami
“Amerika: The Man Who Disappeared” Franz Kafka
“Let's All Kill Constance” Ray Bradbury
“Joyland” Stephen King
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simplepetal · 1 year
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Rose Files Masterlist:
To make it easier to view all post regarding my fanfic, here you go! (Will be updated as time goes on)
Fanfic announcements:
AO3 Series link
The Sacred (Fanfic) Timeline/ Rose & Bucky's Love Story Timeline
Original Characters Fancast List
Original Character Profiles
Fashion Post
The Rogers Twins
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salvagedsouls · 1 year
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tag dump three!!
ft. muses!! will be added to as necessary.
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buckyalpine · 7 months
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Request 👉🏼👈🏼 ? Black widow!reader and winter soldier!Bucky! He was her teacher in the red room, where they eventually fell in love and started a secret relationship, until Hydra and Dreykov found out and separated them. Fast forward several years, Bucky’s out of recovery, reunited with Steve, and living a better life when Tony brings in a new team member. And everyone’s excited but Bucky’s on edge and kinda wary until he learns who it is.
It’s his lil widow, the love of his life, his soulmate. the one Hydra and the red room stole from him, the girl he kept dreaming about no matter how many times his handlers tried to wipe his memories. Just complete fluffy, smutty, love sick shit with him being a massive simp for his deadly girl. maybe building a family, getting married, drabbles of him drooling over her skills or her in the widow suit, like oh yea, I taught her that. I can imagine him being so overly protective, constantly holding her close to his chest because she was stolen away from him once, he won’t survive if that happens again.
YESSSSS God this is so cute and smutty and angsty and FLUFFY it makes my chest itch in the best way. Pls ignore what google translate may have botched. Bucky is the cutest, horny, most deadly simp here, so proud of his girl, absolutely yes.
"ne proyavlyay miloserdiya, soldat" [Show no mercy, soldier], Dreykov hissed, letting the soldier enter the red room with a single widow standing before him, not an ounce of fear in her eyes. The soldier grunted, hitting the button that locked the door that kept her from escaping before lunging forward, testing her agility after personally training her himself.
She leapt over him with ease, bracing her hands on his wide shoulders and landing swiftly behind him and swiping her leg under him to knock him to the floor, straddling him immediately after. He grasped her hands in his, rolling over till she was pinned under his large mass with her wrists held together above her head in his metal hand.
"You've learned well kotenok" His voice was husky behind the mask, blue eyes sparkling while she huffed, rolling her eyes.
"Nespravedlivo, kogda ty takoy bol'shoy, soldat" [Not fair when you're so large, soldier]. She gasped feeling him harden on top of her, his rough uniform doing nothing to hide what he was feeling for her, slotted between her thighs.
"Nespravedlivo, kogda ty takoy krasivyy, kotonok" [Not fair when you're so pretty, kitten]. He climbed off her, allowing her to get into position before attacking again, relentlessly throwing punches and blocking them till she nearly collapsed. They retreated to stand at attention at the sound of the doors hissing open, indicating training was over. The soldier grunted a nod as Dreykov walked in, assessing the widow, a sinister smile plastered on his face seeing both of his assets worn but still at their strongest.
He sent them off to their cells, confident that the fear he'd instilled in his captives would be enough to ensure they stayed in line, not realizing his punishments would only go so far.
It wasn't enough to stop the charming young man from Brooklyn who still lived in his most feared asset.
"Did I hurt you baby" The soldier whispered, kissing her bruised knuckles softly after sneaking into her cell, pulling her into his arms.
"You could never" She smiled, melting into his embrace. She never intended on falling in love with the soldier but here she was, feeling his gentle hands wander, leaning up to kiss his soft, pink lips. They were playing a dangerous game but it was to stop now.
He loved her.
She loved him.
-
"Wipe him" The hydra agent ordered while the soldier gripped onto the chair, gritting his teeth while sharp burning spread through his body, frying his brain. The widow dug her nails into her palms, resolve slowly crumbling seeing the love of her life tortured, unable to hold back anymore.
"Stop!" She finally broke, unable to watch any longer, gasping at the sinister smile Dreykov gave her, ordering his men to grab her before increasing the voltage.
"My, my, does it hurt you when we hurt him" Dreykov sneered, turning up the dial, Bucky's screams tearing her apart on the inside.
"Don't-AH-JAMES" A hydra soldier gripped her hair, yanking her back before she could go to him, shackles binding her hands together, dragging her away.
"kotenok" [kitten] The soldier sadly whispered, unheard by her, her kicking and screaming form blurry from his unshed tears. He screamed in pain as another shock ripped through his veins before the world went black.
He never saw her again.
-
Bucky gasped, sucking in a deep breath of air, his chest heaving from the dream he'd just had, sweat covering his chest, dripping from his forehead.
It was the same thing almost every night.
His mind replaying the same thing over and over again; training with her in the red room, the way she felt under him, the way he'd cuddle and make love to her afterwards without a soul knowing. He didn't plan on falling for the woman he had to train to be a killer but he didn't stand a chance the day she'd knocked him down with a knife pressed to his neck seconds later. He could have married her then and there.
He slumped back against his pillow, running a hand over his face, groaning in frustration.
In the several years, he'd slowly managed to get his life back together. He was apart of the team and living at the compound with Steve and the others. He was no longer controlled by trigger words, he had been forgiven by the government, he was starting to recover from all the trauma he'd endured. His nightmares were less frequent, slowly learning to forgive himself for the things he'd been forced to do under Hydras control.
The only thing he never got over was her.
She still lived in his dreams. Still owned his heart. That was his girl and she was torn away by the very people that had taken everything else from him too. No amount of wiping or torture took her away. His handler tried his hardest, shocking him till his nose bled and his veins nearly burnt to bits but her name would fall from his lips as he lay nearly unconscious.
His sweet widow.
Bucky glanced at the faint light starting to stream through the curtains, swinging his legs over the edge of his bed to get up instead of attempting to sleep for 5 more minutes. He threw on a hoodie and some joggers, making his way to the gym to punch his feelings away as usual. He didn't stop till his knuckles split, ignoring the sting, instead thinking about how he'd kiss her soft hands after he'd train her, bandaging them up when no one was looking.
The hot water from the shower did little to ease the tension in his muscles as he made his way to the kitchen next, plopping onto a stool with a cup of coffee. He was just about to try and relax with his coffee until Steve popped his head in with a grin.
"There you are! Tony was looking for you, we're all heading up now!" Bucky frowned in confusion while Steve grabbed his own mug, filling his cup.
"Why are we having a meeting" Bucky questioned, not willing to get up from his seat, his mind still preoccupied.
"He told you he scouted someone to join the team"
"I remember Tony going on about some new member" Bucky mumbled, not in the mood to meet new people, his anxiety only growing further. "That's today?"
Steve nodded, finishing up the last of his coffee while the brunette stayed glued to the stool.
"Buck, you coming?" Steve turned back to see a frowning Bucky, reluctantly trudging behind the captain while the others excitedly also made their way upstairs to the conference area.
"I heard Tony saying the new agent is scary as shit. Apparently he got his ass handed to him when he tried to test her and he was wearing his suit" Sam snorted while Nat smiled with excitement.
"Finally someone worth sparring with" The redhead nudged him while he shook his head.
"I'm serious! She's deadly deadly. I looked over her file, she's killed more people than you and Clint combined and half of those were hand to hand combat"
"What was the other half"
"Sniper. Like Barnes" Sam nodded to Bucky who was still disconnected from the others, his knee bouncing impatiently.
"We're lucky she's on our side" Steve mused, taking a glance of the file that sat on the table. There was no name or picture to go with it but it had a skillset record nearly put his to shame. "Jesus"
"You good?" Sam whispered to Bucky, noticing he was more closed off than usual, getting a tightlipped grimace like smile in return. Steve sat near the front, straightening himself up while the rest quietened down, hearing the sound of Tony speaking to someone as they approached the room. The billionaire opened the door, letting in the new team member first before entering himself with a large smile on his face.
"Everyone, this is-
"Y/n?" Bucky gasped, shoot up from his seat before Tony could finish, the other sharing confused glances between each other, watching the new team member and Bucky freeze.
"Wait, Barnes, you know-
"Malyshka, eto pravda ty?" [Babygirl, is it really you?] Bucky gasped, his heart hammering against his chest, tears already threatening to spill out. "kotenok, skazhi mne, pozhaluysta, chto eto ty" [kitten, please tell me its you]
"Hold up, he can still speak Russian?" Sam hissed to Steve who hadn't moved, mouth gaping, eyes wide.
"James!" You darted across the room to meet Bucky half way, his strong arms catching and lifting you up with ease as your legs wrapped tightly around his waist. "moy soldat. YA zdes', moy malysh" [my soldier. I'm here my babyboy]
"It's really you" He whispered against your hair, breathing in your soft scent, eyes squeezed shut with tears streaming down his face, "My baby" He cradled you tightly, refusing to set you down while you buried your face into the crook of his neck, drowning out the rest of the world. After you were torn apart from him, you had been locked up in an isolated cell, only let out for select missions Dreykov send you on. You wanted to find your soldier, your James, but you never did with Hydra keeping him under their control.
Now you finally had him again.
"Ahem, as I was saying- This is y/n" Tony addressed the rest of the team, just as surprised as the rest of them with all eyes on Bucky especially. "She'll be joining us once Barnes puts her down"
"Never" Bucky finally pulled away, still holding onto you, his nose nudging against yours, "M'never putting her down, never, you hear me babygirl?" He pressed his lips onto yours, shamelessly kissing you hard, ignoring the whistles that filled the room, only pulling away for air. You let out a shy giggle as he set you back on your feet, his hand wrapped around your waist.
"I'd continue to introduce her but I think tinman knows her better" Tony snorted, throwing his hands up before taking a seat, all eyes now watching two of you while Bucky blushed, unable to wipe the smile of his face, cupping your face to press another kiss to your lips.
"This is y/n" Bucky finally let you go, taking you to the front of the conference room, now proudly showing you off to the other, "She was a widow with Hyrda, handpicked by Dreykov" Bucky sucked in a breath before continuing, giving your hand a squeeze "I trained her in the red room myself when I was still the winter soldier. That's when I fell in love with her" The last part was a whisper, not missed by the team with how lovesick Bucky looked.
"I'm sorry, you trained her? Jesus, no wonder she's deadly" Sam shook his head, now understanding why your file was so impressive. You were already gifted when you were picked, coupled with the fact that you were trained and conditioned by the soldier himself.
"She's fuckin' deadly, alright" Bucky's voice was nearly breathless, his baby blues intently gazing into your eyes. "You should see her with a knife"
That's when I fell in love with you.
"So what happened with you two" Nat prodded, looking at you two with heart eyes which was a rare sight but her heart melted at how soft Bucky was, struggling to keep his hands to himself. He constantly nuzzled into your neck, his large form practically swallowing you whole as he clung onto you like a child.
"They found out we were together so they took me from him" You gave her a sad smile, feeling Bucky hug you tighter; you could have sworn you heard him whimper. "I tried to find him for years but I couldn't"
"Hydra tried to wipe my memories but it never worked. Couldn't forget her" Bucky kissed the top of your head, not realizing his bestfriend was trying to subtly wipe his eyes.
"I was going to have everyone introduce themselves but I think these two have some catching up to do so let's move this meeting over" Tony clapped his hands while everyone else nodded in agreement, leaving you and Bucky alone for some privacy.
"I missed you so much, you have no idea, I-I tried to find you but I just- I could barely function, I'm sorry doll-" Your lips cut off Bucky's rambling, cupping his scruffy face firmly in your hands.
"You have nothing to be sorry about baby, it's not your fault"
"I-I know you just got here and-sweets I don't want to rush anything but-" Bucky's hand gripped your waist while he tried to compose himself, he didn't want to pressure you into anything. "I need you closer baby"
"Take me, soldat" You whispered, not giving him any room to second guess as he hauled you up in his arms, taking you straight to his room. Clothes were off in an instant between frantic and desperate kisses. Bucky didn't rush a thing as soon as he had you naked in his bed, pulling the sheets over you both, rolling over to cuddle instead.
"This is all I wanted" He whispered against your shoulder, kissing your skin, "To have my girl with me again"
"I love you Jamie" You kissed his bare chest, hitching your leg over his waist, his hard length pressing against your soaked cunt. He could feel his tip weeping feeling your soft body pressed against his, still looking just as beautiful, if not more now, from when he'd first met you.
"Prettiest widow" He growled, his wandering hands becoming less wholesome as they moved to your hips, pulling you to press against his erection harder. You moaned feeling him starting to hump your pussy while innocently kisses down your neck, smirking at how he was both sweet and sinful at the same time, just as before. "kotenok, ty mne nuzhen" [Kitten, I need you]
You remembered all the times he'd snuck into your cell for a few cuddles, which always ended up with his hand slammed over your mouth while he railed you with his cock.
"You feel how hard I am for you baby? Mmph, this is all for you, doll" He bit his lip, eyes locked with yours, rolling on top of you, slotting his wide body between your legs, still rutting his hips. "Can I make love to you baby, please" He sounded desperate, dropping his forehead to press against yours, hands coming to pin you against the bed.
"M'yours Jamie" You nodded, spreading your legs wider, not bothering with having prep you, needing him inside you more than anything else. You gasped feeling his thick cockhead rub through your folds before he breeched your hole, stretching you.
"Soldat!" You moaned, your back arching off the bed, the name rolling of your tongue as it had so many times before, your nails digging into his shoulders as he buried himself to the hilt.
"Take your soldat's cock, kotenok" Bucky growled, only giving you a second to adjust before he started to move with slow, deep strokes. "Lemme make love to my babygirl, ya tak sil'no tebya lyublyu" [I love you so much]
After Bucky had been rescued, he had no reason to speak Russian, letting the others think it'd been wiped away just like the words that controlled him. Around you, it rolled off his tongue with ease, your pussy dripping each time he whispered in your ear. Your eyes rolled back feeling him hit that spongy spot deep in your pussy, crying out with the powerful, deliberate snaps of his hips.
"M'I making you feel good baby?" He asked, kissing you sweetly, alternating between the sweetheart and heartbreaker he was, looking at you with soft puppy eyes while his cock grew harder watching your face twist with pleasure. His jaw was slack, thrusting with purpose, moving his hips to roll and let you feel every inch of him filling you up, "You look gorgeous with my cock in you angel, wish you could see how pretty you are, so beautiful like this"
"Oh god James! P-please-m'so close-dont-don-t stop" Your moans grew more salacious, unable to say much else, eyes shutting out of pleasure feeling his hand coming down to rub your swollen clit.
"I know baby, I know, you need me to rub this pretty button, Remember the first time I touched you there pretty girl? How badly you wanted to scream, how much you squirted all over me? Remember when we first made love? First time I tasted you? Remember how shy you were when I spread your legs open and nursed off that little button. How you turned into a slutty kitten, riding and humping my face after? Know your needy little clit loves it, m'gonna rub you till you're screaming"
"Buckyyy" You whined, your face feeling hot at the memory, remembering his growls from under you, turning around to find him jerking his cock faster while he licked and sucked your pussy, cum already painting his abs from cumming once, working to a second orgasm. He'd sealed his lips around your clit, stuffing his mask in your mouth to keep you from alerting the guards.
"Baby, c'mon open your eyes, look at me" Bucky nipped your jaw, his cold hand coming to grasp your cheeks, blue eyes staring into your soul as you opened your eyes, "Don't you dare close them baby, keep em' open when I'm fuckin' you, shit, m'gonna cum for you doll"
"B-Bucky!" You cried, struggling to hold off any longer, your juices soaked him as you started to clench and squeeze his cock, tears nearly streaming down your face.
"Scream all you want baby, don't have to hide those pretty moans ever again" He fucked you through your orgasm, his own balls getting tighter with each thrust, precum mixing with your arousal, dripping onto the sheets, "Thats-that-s it baby, m'gonna cum so hard for you, fill you up, you're mine doll, you're fuckin' MINE"
Bucky's hand flew to the headboard, pounding you into the mattress, moaning loudly, letting the wood splinter under his grip as he came, pumping you full of his seed.
"FUCK y/n" He gasped, collapsing on you, panting, burying his face into your breasts as he always did, turning into a needy baby as if he didn't rail your soul. You giggled, tracing your hand down his spine making his shiver, whining when you clenched around his sensitive, soft cock.
"My soldat" You whispered, carding your fingers through his hair, letting him latch onto your nipple, needily sucking for comfort. No matter how big, bad and scary he was, he always melted into a puddle for you, closing his eyes at the feeling of your sweet peaked nipple against his tongue.
"Never letting you go again" He whispered before falling asleep on your chest, arms wrapped tightly around you. "ty moya rodstvennaya dusha, malyshka" [you're my soul mate, babygirl]
"YA by proshel cherez vse eto snova tol'ko radi tebya, malysh" [I'd go through it all again just for you baby boy] you whispered, closing your eyes in the safety of his hold, meaning each of your words. You'd go through everything a thousand times over if it meant you'd have your Bucky back in your arms. Bucky sniffled, curling up with you, spending the rest of the day alternating between speaking sweet words and making you moan and cry over his cock until you couldn't move any longer. For the first time, he slept peacefully, not stirring once.
-
Ever since you'd come back, Bucky had turned into the biggest simp, alternating between acting like a menace and a complete lovesick puppy with no in between. It was worse when you were on the field, almost leading to Tony refusing to let you both go on missions at the same time.
"Oh god" Bucky groaned, seeing you step out in your sleek suit, the dark material clinging to your body, weapons strapped along your hips. You threw him a wink before running off to kick ass, his focus solely on you.
"Jesus Christ" He nearly moaned seeing you land a kick to an attacker before throwing you knife across the room, the blade landing perfectly between your targets eyebrows. "Baby, you're sexy"
"For fucks Sake Barnes, did you forget we can all hear you" Tony's exasperated voice crackled through, this not being the first time the soldier was distracted watching you fight. Sam and Steve snickered through the coms while Bucky shameless shrugged, still biting his lip, watching you move with ease.
"Have you seen my girl, Stark" Bucky sassed back, walking over bodies to grab you by your ass, squeezing it and smashing his lips against yours.
"Are you two fucking kissing?!" Tony sighed, hearing the sound of soft moans and smacking, "I'm putting you on a fucking leash, I'm getting you fixed Barnes"
"My naughty soldat" You giggled, pulling away, nipping your boyfriends pouty lip while he shook his head.
"Gonna be the death of me, pretty girl"
"You're both gonna be the death of all of us" Tony deadpanned, unable to understand how there was a man out there that was more horny and flirty than him. "I'm having Barnes neutered, for fucks sake I can see you drooling from over here"
-
Bucky was even worse watching you display your skills, his workout long forgotten while you sparred with Steve.
"Where the fuck did you learn that" Steve groaned while you giggled, holding your hand out to help him up while Bucky watched from the side with a cocky smirk.
"I taught her that" He threw you a wink, not so subtly adjusting his sweats.
"Of course you did" Steve huffed, surprised to find bruises on his body from where you'd hit him. "Jesus punk" He blushed heavily seeing his bestfriends raging hard on, scrambling away from the gym, knowing exactly what would come next.
The loud moans he heard moments later made him shake his head, happy he got out of there unlike the last time he saw the warning signs of a feral Bucky.
Aside from being more in love with you than ever, Bucky was also equally protective over you. He'd hug you with such care, always holding your head to his chest, his large arms covering you from the rest of the world, constantly fearing that even if he had you now, someone would come and take you away.
When he finally asked you to marry him, he paused several times, blinking through tears while down on one knee, your hand wiping his cheek, saying yes before he could even finish. The compound was transformed with flowers, candles with a small intimate wedding in the garden.
Steve and Sam stood by Bucky's side while Nat walked with you, your sweet soon to be husband biting back tears seeing his dream girl in her dress, the life he'd always imagine finally becoming a reality. When Tony pronounced you husband and wife, Bucky didn't stop kissing you till he nearly passed out, not a single dry eye surrounding you as he whisked you up in his arms.
-
Bucky felt a strong wave of emotion watching you flit around the kitchen, making his way over and wrapping his arms from behind, tucking his face into your neck. You blinked, feeling tears wet your skin, pulling away to find your husband sniffling.
"Baby, what's gotten into you" You cooed with concern, wiping away the tears that collected along his lashes, kissing his reddened nose. "Is everything okay?"
"Just-m'scared to lose you again" Bucky whispered, his hand coming to protectively wrap around your growing belly; you weren't showing much yet but he could still feel the little baby bump. "I can't loose you again angel, I can't go through that again"
"It won't happen Jamie" You wrapped your arms around his shoulders while he picked you up, setting you onto the counter before hiding against your neck again, hugging you tightly. "What's wrong baby, what's gotten you so scared"
"Can't believe I got you back. I got to marry my dream girl. We're starting a family, you're giving me a baby, I-it feels unreal. M'scared I'm gonna wake up and you'll-" He bit his lip, shuddering at the very thought, "You'll be gone"
"Baby boy look at me" You held his face again, making him look at you, "Would you ever let anyone take me from you again?"
Bucky looked horrifying, francially shaking his head, he'd burn the world to ashes before he let that happen.
"Never. Never angel, no one is taking you or our baby from me" He stated firmly while you hummed.
"See? I'll be just fine. I have my soldat" You whispered, melting against his chest. "No one can hurt me when I have my soldat"
Bucky finally relaxed, carrying you off to bed, his metal arm protecting your belly as he pulled the covers over you both. No one would ever take his little widow away again.
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1800jjbarnes · 1 year
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𝐓𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐈𝐬 𝐁𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝐒𝐭𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐲 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
【Synopsis】 : You suggest something new, and the boys love the idea.
『Word count』 : 2.1k 
Paring: Steve x Bucky x Reader [Poly Au] 
[Warnings] : Making out. Hickeys. Big dick energy. Light-hearted sex. Poly relationship. Swearing. Pet names. Praise from Bucky. Steve is a moaning mess. Multiple orgasms. Protected anal sex. Unprotected sex (Steve didn't wrap it).
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"Please, please. Please." You sounded like a broken record. One that had been broken by none other than the infamous lone wolf Bucky and his best friend, Steve. You were the good girl around the compoud. You weren't the best agent by all means, but you weren't an unskilled either. You had friends in and out of the heroing and crime fighting. You try to live a normal life.... well, that was until Bucky, the deep-voiced man that recently joined the Avengers, started to take interest in you.
Everyone wanted him and his best friends. They were the walking sex on legs. But none of them were interested in relationships or flings or even hookups. Especially with the women and some men shield agnets that only started working for the avengers because they wanted to get closer to them. People would lie, saying they'd been with them, but in truth, Bucky and Steve were untouchable, and that made them even more desirable. Heck, Bucky didn't even like human interaction with anyone other than their friend group. But yet when Bucky saw you, he knew he wanted you. And so did Steve.
It became a game of cat and mouse. But in this case, it was two very, very large cats cornering one scared little mouse. You wanted it, though. As much as you fought it at first. You wanted the pleasure you knew they would provide. But part of you wanted to keep your dignity, not wanted to be plastered as a whore in the compound. But Bucky and Steve reassured you that no one would come to know your dirty secret. And yet, no one would even believe it anyway if it were to get out.
So here you stand, with two large bodies holding you close in between them. Steve's fingers were paced fast as you high came, ripping closer and closer. Bucky's tongue lapped the bright purple marks on your soft skin, the ones he created so he could show others you were taken without anyone knowing who exactly gave them to you. They were both possessive over you. Learning more and more things about you and your body every time they had you in these situations.
"Steve , I.." You gripped his biceps, nails digging into his flesh as you could feel your orgasm approaching. Steve just chuckled, going faster while Bucky snaked his hand from behind you to place a finger on your clit, circling it quickly in time with Steve's thrusts.
"Fuck fuck fuck.." you swore, knees buckling, you fall into Bucky's arms, making him keep you up while they continue. Your orgasm comes quickly, Steve letting out a chuckle at his work. You were so fucked out already and they hadn't even started yet. Bucky swopped you up, laying you on his bed while Steve takes this time to undress, finally making you not the only one naked in the room. Bucky kisses your forehead whispering how good you were, making your heart jump at his words.
“Bucky.” You shakily place a hand on his cheek, bringing him close so you could kiss him on the lips passionately. Buck’s hands snaked down your body, gripping your breast, giving them a squeeze. You moan into his mouth, making him smile. The noises you made were always music to his ears.
“So Me or Buckaroo first, baby? Since we chose last time.” Steve rubbed your ankles as he stood by the end of the bed. You sat up, looking at your lover. A hard gulp ran down your throat as you tried to prepare yourself to answer him. You recently found you wanted to try a new thing but became unsure how to ask. No better time than the present, right?
“I…I want both of you..” You glance over to Bucky, “At the same time.” Steve and Bucky could feel their dicks twitch at the idea. don’t get them wrong, they both fantasised about taking you at the same time but they didn’t want to scare you away with the act. But hearing the thought roll off your tongue, god it made them go feral. Bucky jumped up, ripping his shirt off while he jogged over to his dresser.
“Rock, paper, scissors,” Steve shouted with a huge smile like a teenager. You tilted your head in confusion as you watched Bucky strip down while he held his fist out.
“Deal.” Bucky smirks, throwing the lube on the bed next to you before also placing his fist out. They swung, Steve getting scissors, and Bucky getting rock.
“Fuck!” Steve swears with a whimpering tone. Bucky laughs smugly, walking over to you with pride. He lets his hand out for you to take, so he can pull you up off the bed so you could stand on your wobbly legs. Did they really just play rock, paper, scissors for who fucks you in which hol-
“Oh god….” Your cheeks run a blush in a similar shade to the evening sky. Bucky twirls you, so you face Steve, and he could stand behind you. He kisses your neck from behind, rubbing your ass slightly before letting his hand land a smack on your soft skin.
“Next time, Stevie. But right now, this ass is mine.” Bucky chuckles to himself.
He lathers himself up with lube and then coats his fingers again. With one finger, he begins prodding at your ass before slipping it in slowly. It’s a foreign feeling, and it has you squirming under his touch. He murmurs something in your ear you can’t quite make out, but it’s all a blur anyways when he begins sucking at your neck. He adds another finger, and he has to hold you in place. It’s almost painful, but the lube is a blessing.
Steve is suddenly in your sight, grabbing your chin to look at him. “Keep your eyes on me, I wanna see your face.”
Steve cups your core, chuckling slightly at how wet you still were... He’s able to slip two fingers in easily, and the noise that comes from your lips is something that you wouldn’t imagine. They go at two different paces, and you can’t think. You forget that you’re meant to be looking at Steve, and you focus on him again. Bucky has to hold you up as your knees keep wanting to give way. You have never felt this much before in your life.
“I...I feel weird..” The tingle in your gut was growing differently than any other orgasms you’ve ever experienced before. You lent more into Bucky's body, while Steve got down on his knees so he could be face to face with your dripping pussy. His tongue licks a long strip, making you gasp out, gripping his short hair. His fingers got faster while Bucky stayed at the same pace, making your brain shortcircuit. Before you could tell what was going on, you were cumming all over Steve’s face.
“Fuck, our baby just squirted,” Steve said in amusement while Bucky chuckled against your ear, making you blush even more than you were prior. They both pulled out making you whine. You left dizzy, unable to register what was happening. All you could do was watch Steve disappear for a second before reappearing with a towel, wiping his face clean with a smug smile plastered to it. You could hear the sound of a wrapper being opened behind you. You glanced over your shoulder, seeing Bucky rolling a condom on his thick length. He had a sweet smile, but you knew this man had a dark side. He was going to enjoy ruining you.
“Okay, Stevie, lay back and let our baby ride you.” Steve does what Bucky asks, laying down on the bed so you can straddle his hips. You guide his cock to your entrance and sink down on him, watching his face contort as you squeeze his length. He fills you perfectly, hitting spots inside you that make you see stars. Fuck, you swear every time you feel his cock it gets bigger. From behind, you suddenly feel Bucky’s fingers, slick from the lube, slide against your ass like he had done before. You shiver at the feeling but welcome it, angling your hips so he has better access.
“You feel so perfect squeezing me,” Steve moans from below you, hands reaching out to grope your breasts in order to distract you from the discomfort you might feel soon enough.
“Isn’t she tight, Stevie. Always so good for us ?” Bucky grins, pressing a finger into your ass. You hold your breath at the feeling, but Steve just whispers calming words to you. You relax into them as Buck slowly moves his finger. One finger becomes two, and you ride Steve a bit harder as you warm up to the feeling. He grips your hips and guides you on his large cock, working the pleasure from you.
“Please, James, please,” you beg, leaning back up against his chest. He kisses your neck and smiles at your neediness.
“You ready for me, Doll?” he teases, thrusting his fingers at a quicker pace.
“Fuck yes, Bucky, I need you so bad.” Bucky pulls you into a bruising kiss as he removes his fingers and replaces them with the tip of his cock.
“You’re doing so good for us, baby. Now be a good girl and take a deep breath.” Bucky keeps kissing you as he presses his cock further and further inside of you. Steve helps you relax, but you can tell it’s difficult for him, too. His strokes are getting messy as you get tighter around him. His release came quicker than he expected. Only a thin wall now separates Bucky and Steve’s cocks, and that just turns them on even more. It turns you on even more.
They pump into you simultaneously, finding the perfect rhythm that makes your heart stutter. You’re at mercy to them, putty in their hands while their thrusts become different pacing, making it near hard to breathe.  All you can do is moan and beg, your brain becoming jelly the harder they fuck you. With their stamina, they last so much longer than other men. I guess the serm could be a blessing in some situations. They bring you to orgasm after orgasm, pleasing you seems to be their only goal.
“I’m gonna come,” Steve whimpers from below you, fingers digging into your hips with bruising force. “Please, I’m gonna come.” Bucky leans over to bite your shoulder, pumping into your ass with deeper strokes than ever.
“You gonna cum Doll? You want Stevie to cum inside you?” Bucky’s fingers wrap around your neck, giving it a tight squeeze.
“Oh my god, Stevie, please give it to me. Please come inside me,” you moan through your strong high, gripping onto Bucks’s metal arm. Steve comes on a long, drawn-out moan, sending Bucky over the edge right after. He thrusts into you a few more times before he becomes too sensitive, and then they’re both pulling out.
The three of you fall into a heap on the bed, panting and sweating for a moment. Bucky kisses you deeply before shifting to give Stevw the same treatment. Buck gets up to grab a washcloth while Steve holds you tightly, pampering your face with sweet kisses. They take care of you sweetly. Ensuring not to irritate your sensitive skin, Bucky cleans you up, and together, you and Steve care for Bucky. Once you are all done, you flop on the bed with Bucky on his back and you half on top of him. Steve cuddles up next to you, wrapping his arms around your waist while nuzzling his face into your shoulder. it was silent for a moment. The only things that could be heard were your bumping hearts and breathing that finally began to slow down. It was peaceful until Steve opened his big, smug mouth.
“Ready for round two?”
You have never wanted to slap him so much as right now.
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Honey Girl. Chapter Eight.
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chapter one. chapter two. chapter three. chapter four. chapter five. chapter six. chapter seven. series masterlist. the playlist.
Chapter Synopsis - Turns out, you’re not the only ones with a secret.
Pairing - Dadsbestfriend!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader - soulmate au
Warnings - cursing. mentions of hospitals/medical settings.
Word Count - 5k
Authors Note - I promise that the reveal was supposed to be in this part!! but I hit 5k words real quick and thought rather than rush it, I’d give it its full own chapter. guess what’s coming next ;). as always, thank you for your love and support and patience and encouragement and kindness. don’t know where I’d be without it <3
as always, if you enjoyed this, please consider reblogging!! reblogs are the only way to circulate my writing, which generates more of it. feel free to send me a comment or an inbox, too!! thanks, my loves!! <3
Masterlist. Inbox.
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The sun beams through the white linen curtains, salty ocean breeze drifting through the open window. The rays warm your skin as you kick off the sheets, stretching your arms above your head. You turn over, to find the space next to you empty.
Rubbing the sleepiness from your eyes, you yawn, inhaling the scent of breakfast. Throwing on Bucky’s soft blue button up, you pad out to the kitchen to find him at your stovetop, shirtless and sun kissed.
“I’m getting the full girlfriend experience, huh?”
He grins at the sound of your voice, entire body lighting up with it.
“Girlfriend,” he laughs. “This is the soulmate experience, baby. It’s even better.”
You shake your head, but you can’t fight the smile that etches itself on your face. He looks so at home here, so comfortable. He reaches up to grab a plate from your cupboard, and you feel the sudden urge to burst into tears.
He knows where everything is.
He’s learnt his way around the kitchen just like he’s learnt his way around your heart. Your soul. Your very existence.
“You okay?”
He turns off the burner and glides over to you, warm hands finding your hips like it’s second nature.
“What’s wrong? You like pancakes,” he teases, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead tenderly. “Oh no. Did you want waffles?”
You shake your head, swallowing down the lump in your throat.
“I’m fine,” you say, but your voice cracks instantly.
“Doesn’t sound like it.”
He says it so gently, so carefully. You feel like a precious flower, something to be taken care of, cherished, loved. No one has ever made you feel like this.
“I just realised you… fit, here. Like you were always supposed to. I can’t really remember what this apartment was like before it had you in it too.”
Bucky cradles your face in his hands, tilting your head up to look at him.
“Wherever you are. That’s where my home is.”
You surge forwards to press your lips to his, alive and buzzing with the electricity of being loved so wholly. He reciprocates instantly, wrapping his arms around your back to pull you closer, so you’re chest to chest.
“Your pancakes are going to burn,” you mumble, forehead resting on his.
“Let them.”
“No, don’t let them. I’m not calling the fire department today.”
He laughs, kissing you again chastely before returning to his original position. He plates up your breakfast - pancakes, fruit, granola and yoghurt, with fresh coffee in your favourite mug.
“I could get used to this.”
“And you will,” he flirts, kissing the crown of your head. “Every day for the rest of your life, baby. You’re gonna have to wake up to my face forever.”
You pretend to shudder, laughing when he pinches your side.
“Come on, trouble. Let’s eat breakfast on the balcony and pretend we’re on a tropical vacation somewhere.”
“Sounds perfect.”
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
“We’re really doing this.”
You look up at Bucky, the heavy weight of his arm around your shoulders acting as a grounding agent. Your plates are discarded on the table, cleared and finished, the two of you curled up in your loveseat. The sun is getting warmer, and it’s bringing out Bucky’s freckles, all boyish and glowy.
“We don’t have a choice.”
“Honey girl, there’s always a choice.”
“Not this time,” you sigh, shifting so you can face him properly. “I wanted to do this on our terms, and now I feel like I’ve been forced into it. It isn’t fair.”
“We can wait,” Bucky reassures, confident and understanding. “We don’t have to do anything until you’re ready.”
“I am ready. I have been for a while. It just sucks that it feels like I’ve been pushed in a certain direction, you know?”
“I know,” he soothes, work rough fingertips tracing patterns on your bare legs. “But like you said, we were going to do it anyway. This is still our choice. These are still our terms.”
You press your lips onto his cheek, chuckling when his stubble tickles your skin. He retaliates by attacking you with kisses, planting them all over your face, wherever he can reach. You squeal, hands flying out to his bare chest to try and stop him.
“Your neighbours are going to think there’s a murder happening,” Bucky laughs, fingers sliding up your shirt to rest on your ribs.
“Oh no, they love you too much for that.”
He quirks his eyebrows in surprise.
“They do?”
“The lady that lives next door, Mrs Daniels - she’s like ninety, has that white cat you always see?”
Bucky nods in recognition, so you continue.
“She talks about how handsome you are every time I see her. Always asks when the ‘man that looks like a movie star’ is coming over next.”
He laughs, shaking his head as you tease him.
“Shut up.”
“I’m serious! She probably watches you come and go from her balcony. She’s gonna love it in the summer, when you turn up in your short shorts with no shirt on.”
Bucky chuckles, pulling you into him and leaning his head on top of yours.
“Don’t be jealous, baby. You’re the only one for me.”
“I better be,” you chide jokingly, pinching his thigh in warning.
“I’ve been waiting for you my whole life.”
There’s no humour, anymore. Just love. So much love.
“I’m here now,” you whisper. “And I’m not going anywhere. Ever.”
Bucky leans in to press a kiss to your lips, gentle and filled with a lifetimes worth of promise.
“I love you, honey baby.”
“I love you, Bucky Barnes.”
You let the morning sun slip over you like silk sheets, warm and smooth and completely luxurious. Bucky’s steady breathing grounds you slowly as peace and contentment settle into your bones, weighted and calming. No matter what happens today, you know one thing for certain - you have the security of Bucky’s love to fall back on.
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
You’ve been sat in Bucky’s truck for twenty five minutes.
It’s parked down the block from your parent’s house, just out of the way. You were pulling in to their street when you panicked, begging Bucky to stop the car so you could breathe for a second.
“Sweet girl, we’ll be fine.”
“I know. I know,” you exhale. Inhale again. “Why is this so hard?”
“Because we’ve been thinking about this moment ever since that first night.”
“It’s almost been a year.”
That seems to stop Bucky in his tracks for a second.
“It… it doesn’t feel that long. Feels like yesterday. But also, somehow, like I’ve loved you my whole life.”
You lean over the console to kiss him softly, trying to ignore the hummingbird fluttering of your heart in your chest.
“Honey, I can feel your anxiety, remember? If you don’t calm down a little, we’ll both collapse.”
“Sorry,” you laugh, taking a deep breath. “Sorry.”
Bucky intertwines his fingers with yours, thumb running over the backs of your knuckles. Soothing, like a field of lavender gently blowing in the breeze on the first day of spring.
“We have to do it sometime.”
“I know,” you nod, squeezing his hand once, twice, three times before pulling away and fixing your hair in the tiny mirror. “Let’s do this. Now or never.”
You pull up outside your childhood home, instantly relaxing a little at the sight of the colourful drapes and flowers in the windows.
“Shit, Buck. We haven’t even planned what we’re gonna say.”
“We don’t need to. Just speak from your heart, baby. I’ll follow your lead.”
When you walk up the driveway, you know there’s no turning back. You also know that the weight on your shoulders will feel a hell of a lot less heavy when you leave. It’s a double edged sword, but you’re ready to wield it, with love as your armour and Bucky as your shield.
You stand a foot apart and ring the doorbell, bouncing nervously on the soles of your feet.
“Hi, sweetheart. Oh - hey, Buck.”
“Hi, Mama.”
“Hi, Lori.”
“Didn’t expect to see you both today.”
You go to speak, but she continues quickly.
“I’m glad you’re here. We need to talk to you both about something. Come in, come in.”
You look at Bucky, realising suddenly that your chest is filled with a foreign anxiety. It’s his.
You squeeze his hand chastely as you walk past him to enter the house, kicking off your shoes in the hallway.
There’s something in the atmosphere when you walk into the living room. The sun is still shining, everything is in its rightful place… but it feels wrong. You know Bucky feels it too, judging by the way his muscles tense next to you.
“Is everything alright, Mama?”
You hate the way your voice sounds like a child’s, small and naive. Your Dad is sat on the couch waiting, always happy to see you. You press a kiss to his cheek before taking a seat across from him, Bucky sitting next to you. Your Mom joins your Dad, both of them looking at you with too much compassion for a normal day.
“What are you two doing here?” your Dad asks, voice still full of light.
Something inside of you is telling you to abort mission, postpone until further notice. You listen to it, wondering for a second if somehow you and Bucky can send messages to each other telepathically all of a sudden.
“Mama said you needed to talk to me. To us.”
He looks taken aback, only for a second. Something like sadness flashes in his eyes before he paints that familiar smile right back on his face.
“Yeah, we do. You sure you don’t wanna tell us why you’re here, first?”
“It can wait,” you reassure, catching Bucky’s minute nod from the corner of your eye.
“Okay,” your Mom begins. “First of all, I need to tell you not to panic, okay? It’s going to seem super scary, but it isn’t.”
Bucky slides closer to you by a millimetre, but you feel it like it’s a mile.
“I don’t really know how to tell you this, honey, so we’ll just start from the beginning. Jack?”
Your Dad nods before taking over the storytelling.
“It all started last year. I was doing some work in the backyard. One minute I was mowing the lawn, the next I was lying on the ground.”
All of the colour drains from your cheeks, and Bucky slides ever so slightly closer again.
“We thought maybe it was heat stroke, or dehydration. No cause for concern, and nothing your Mom’s iced tea couldn’t fix.”
She takes his hand in hers, both of them with their eyes fixed on you.
“But then it happened again. In the shower, this time. I didn’t hit my head, luckily, but I did whack my shoulder against the tiles, which hurt like hell.”
He laughs, and so does your Mom, but you’re not sure what’s funny. Anxiety is rolling off you in waves so strong, Bucky’s worried he might pass out.
Your Mom takes back the reigns, continuing.
“I was insistent that he saw a doctor, which he was reluctant about. Luckily, he agreed, finally,” she gives him a look, “and we got referred to a specialist.”
“What kind of specialist?” you choke out. It feels like someone is sitting on your chest, constricting your lungs with every passing minute.
“A cardiologist.”
It seems to be that word that unravels everything for you. All you can think is cardiologist heart attack cardiologist surgery cardiologist. Serious. Serious. Serious.
“Sweetheart?”
You grab Bucky’s hand, praying that the familiar touch will ground you back down to Earth. When it doesn’t, you feel like you’re falling, down and down and down with no end in sight.
“Honey, it’s okay. Hey, listen to me. You’re okay.”
Your Mom sits down on the other side of you as your Dad kneels down, forcing you to look at him.
“Sweetheart, don’t panic, okay? Everything’s going to be fine. I know it’s scary, but I’m okay.”
“For now,” you whisper, limp in your throat forming.
“I know it’s a lot to take in, and I know it’s probably not what you were expecting us to say. We thought we’d wait until we had answers to tell you… but it’s taking longer than expected. Which is why we’re telling you now. We don’t want you to feel like you’re in the dark.”
Bucky’s running his thumb over the lines on your palm, reassuring and steady. He knows exactly how to comfort you, like a warm blanket wrapped around your shoulders. If you listen carefully enough, you can hear the drumming beat of his heart. You tune into it, letting the familiar rhythm calm you down.
“Sorry,” you murmur. “I’m being dramatic.”
“You’re not being dramatic,” your Mom responds, squeezing her hand over your knee. “It’s overwhelming. And we’ve just… thrown it at you, with no warning. It’s a lot to take in.”
You’re anxious and scared and completely lost. You’re also safe and home and completely surrounded by love from all sides.
“I’m okay,” you nod, taking a deep breath.
Your parents return to their couch across from you, but Bucky’s hand doesn’t let go of yours. If they think it’s strange, they don’t say anything. You have a feeling they’re a little preoccupied.
“Now what?”
“Your Dad is still undergoing tests to get to the root of the issue. Whatever they find, we know we’ll all be okay.”
“Your Mom’s right. I have an appointment this afternoon for an EKG. They’re trying to rule things out slowly. We’ll get to the bottom of it, sweetheart.”
“Are you okay?” you ask, suddenly realising you’ve accidentally made this about you.
“I’m fine,” he laughs. “Seriously. I know it’s scary, but I feel good in myself for the most part. The most annoying thing is that I can’t predict it - it just happens. Very inconvenient, if you ask me.”
Your parents laugh, and this time, you try to chuckle with them.
“You’ll keep us updated, won’t you?”
Bucky’s voice surprises you, somehow. His fingers are still intertwined with yours, but you’ve been so focused on your Dad, you almost forgot he was there.
“Of course, Buck.”
“And if you ever need a ride to an appointment or anything, all you gotta do is ask, alright?”
“You offering to take me on your motorcycle?”
“Sure,” Bucky laughs.
“Absolutely not,” your Mom says at the same time.
You chuckle for real, now. This feels like normality - the four of you, joking around. You have to remind yourself, sometimes, that Bucky knew your Dad before he ever knew you. You were away at culinary school when they met, but you were told stories instantly about this new guy in town who bought the old Garage and drives a cool truck. Your Mom, of course, didn’t fail to mention his big blue eyes and chocolate brown hair, or the way his shirt hugged his biceps. You thought she was exaggerating, when she said he was handsome.
Oh, how wrong you were.
You’re one hundred percent sure you’ve never met a more beautiful person. Maybe it’s your Tethering talking. Maybe it isn’t. You’re not unaware of the way people look at Bucky - he’s got this old school movie star thing going on, and people seem to eat it up. You get it. You get it more than anyone.
But it isn’t his pretty face that makes your heart skip a beat. It’s just him. Him, with his contagious smile and healing laugh and observant eyes. Him, with his confident demeanour but gentle touch, his mind reading abilities, his talent for making you feel like you’re the only person in the room. He’s a rarity, Bucky Barnes. A diamond in the rough. You remind yourself everyday how lucky you are.
He knocks his knee into yours, pulling you out of your daydream. He gives you a look that asks are you okay? to which you nod subtly in reply. A conversation, somehow both silent and loud.
“As much as I’d love to stay here all day, we should get ready to go. My appointment is soon.”
Your Dad strides over to you, wrapping you in his arms. You instantly feel like a little girl again, safe and protected no matter what. You bury your face into his chest a little more, inhaling the familiar scent of your home.
“Everything’s okay, sweetheart,” he whispers into your hair. “Promise.”
You nod against him, tightening your arms ever so slightly. He gives you a squeeze, letting you know he got the message.
As you’re putting your shoes on in the hallway, you can hear your Dad and Bucky chatting away about the baseball game from the previous night, routine easily resumed. Your Mom brushes your hair back from your face, looking at you carefully.
“I almost forgot why you came here in the first place, babygirl. What’s up? What did you want to tell us?”
Your heart skips a beat and Bucky feels it, glancing over to you with concern in his ocean blue eyes.
“It’s okay, Mama. It can wait.”
She raises her eyebrows in scepticism.
“Promise,” you reassure. “Another day.”
She doesn’t look convinced, but lets it go anyway, pressing a kiss to your cheek gently.
“We’ll call you after his appointment and let you know what they say. We love you. So much.”
You hug her fiercely, realising that you don’t do it often enough.
“Love you guys. More than anything.”
Bucky gives you a nod that tells you he’s ready to go, both of you leaving a little different than you entered.
“Call us as soon as you get out of that room, okay?”
“We will, Buck,” your Dad laughs, mock saluting his best friend.
Bucky chuckles, falling into step next to you as you walk down the driveway. You make your way down the street, out of your parents view, before your knees give out. He manages to catch you just in time, strong arms wrapped around your middle. You both sit on the kerbside, Bucky rubbing soft patterns into your back through your shirt.
“Baby, hey. You okay? Talk to me.”
You take a deep breath, looking at him with watery eyes.
“What if it’s bad, Buck?” you whisper. “I can’t do this without him. He’s the best Dad in the world.”
Bucky pulls you closer, fitting you into his side perfectly. Two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, made for each other.
“They don’t lie to you, honey. They’d tell you if it was really serious. All you can do is wait, and hope everything will be okay. Which it will.”
You rest your head on his shoulder, letting his warmth calm you down.
“My Mama knows something.”
“Like what?”
“About us. She didn’t say anything, but I could see it on her face. She didn’t push it any further, but she was definitely suspicious.”
“We’ll tell her soon. Give it a little more time.”
You nod, wrapping your arms around his bicep tightly. He presses a kiss into your hair, inhaling the scent of your shampoo as he does it.
“Let’s go home, hmm? We can sit in the sun for a while, chop up that pineapple we bought yesterday.”
“Sounds perfect,” you whisper, looking up at him.
The afternoon hits his face just right, all warm yellow light and soft angles on his cheeks. The intermittent salty breeze ruffles his hair, all fluffy and sea swept. He looks like an ancient statue, a work of art from the renaissance, a museum piece. The sun could burn out tomorrow, but you’ll have a life source forever. Your Soulmate.
Bucky takes your hands in his and helps you to your feet, heavy arm slung over your shoulders as you walk back to the truck.
Your light in the dark. Your water in the desert. You’ve never been more grateful for him.
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
“Close your eyes.”
Bucky’s driving you home, the sound of the ocean waves hitting the shore a replacement for the radio.
“What?”
“Close your eyes, sugar. I want to show you something.”
“How are you gonna show me if my eyes are shut?”
He chuckles, pinching your thigh.
“Just shut up and close your eyes.”
You smile gently before doing as he says, covering your face with your hands for good measure.
“Where are we going?”
“It’s a surprise. You’ll like it, I promise.”
You relax back into the seat, allowing the breeze from the open window to whip through your hair. Eventually you come to a stop, Bucky clicking off your seatbelt for you.
“Keep ‘em closed.”
Bucky sprints around to the passenger side, swinging open the door and wrapping his arms around you. He practically carries you out of the car, ensuring you don’t trip while you have no vision. He plants you on two feet, making sure you’re steady before he lets go of you.
“Okay. Open your eyes.”
You blink slowly, adjusting to the brightness of the afternoon.
You’re in the middle of nowhere. The two of you are stood on a huge, grassy plot of land, overlooking a small cove of the beach. You’re tucked completely out of the way, not a neighbour to be seen. All you can hear is the ocean, the birds, and the sound of your thumping heartbeat.
“Where are we, Buck? It’s pretty.”
He takes your hand, looking out towards the water.
“This is gonna be our house.”
Your head whips around in shock, confusion written all over your face.
“What?”
Your voice is barely above a whisper, but Bucky hears it, clear as day.
“I bought this land years ago, when I moved to town. I always knew I wanted to build a place of my own, but I could never get the plans off the ground. Something didn’t feel right. And then our Tethering happened…”
He squeezes your hand tightly, pulling you into his side.
“And everything fell into place. I was waiting for the right moment to show you, and it feels like you needed it today.”
You can’t speak. You’re completely lost for words, looking out at the perfect view. Turning to him, you throw your arms around his neck, burying your face in the crook of it and inhaling.
“Thank you,” you murmur into his skin. “It’s so perfect. You’re so perfect.”
“I’m so lucky,” he chuckles. “My God, you were worth the wait. I’d wait another ten lifetimes if I meant I got to love you again for one of them.”
You’re glad he’s holding onto you, or you’re convinced your legs would give out. You lean up to press a kiss to his lips, savouring the spearmint on his tongue.
“I love you,” you pray into his mouth. “I love you so much I can barely breathe.”
He kisses you back, harder, determined to show you exactly how he feels about you. Your fingers tangle into his hair, making him groan as you tug. His hands slide down to your ass, gripping harshly as he pulls you into his front. He wants every inch of you pressed together.
When you pull away, he rests his forehead against yours.
“You can have anything you want, you know.”
“Hmm?”
“With the house. I know we talked about it that night, at dinner in California. But if you think of anything else you’d like, all you gotta do is tell me.”
“One storey or two?”
“I was always thinking two.”
“Then I’d like a balcony, on the master bedroom. I love mine back at my apartment, especially in the summer.”
“Done,” he confirms, pecking your lips again.
“And a porch,” you whisper. “That we can sit on and watch the waves, when we’re old and grey.”
“I’ll be grey a lot sooner than you,” he jokes.
“You’re a lot more relaxed than me,” you laugh. “So I doubt that, actually.”
You rest your head on his warm chest, both of you swaying to the song of the ocean.
“We’ve got plenty of time, Buck.”
“All the time in the world, honey girl.”
The two of you stay wrapped in each other for a little while longer, enjoying the company of the one person you were destined for.
You can’t remember why you were ever so against soulmates. Loving Bucky is the easiest thing you’ve ever done.
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
The two of you spend the rest of the afternoon curled up on the balcony, letting the sun warm you from the outside in.
“Pineapple will always remind me of those margaritas,” Bucky smiles, throwing a piece into his mouth. “Our first date.”
“And last, apparently,” you laugh. “We haven’t been on one since.”
“I mean, we sort of date everyday, right?”
“Yeah, I guess we do. After we’ve told my parents, we don’t have to worry anymore. We can go out whenever we want, whenever we want.”
“Exactly,” he murmurs, leaning in to kiss you tenderly. “Not long now.”
The sound of your phone ringing startles you both, your hand flying out to find it in the cushions of the loveseat.
“Hello?”
“Oh, thank God. I half thought you were dead.”
“Not dead, Lacie. Just busy.”
She laughs, and you realise suddenly how much you’ve missed that sound.
“You’re back in town, right?”
“Yeah, just for a few more days. Then I’m gonna go back to Cali and pack up my stuff for good.”
“Perfect! Me and you are doing dinner tomorrow night. I want you to meet Cameron.”
“Really? Finally! I’m so excited, Lace. Your place, or are we going out?”
“Come to mine. Cam is the best cook, seriously. I’ve gotta run, we’re picking out a couch today. A couch, babe! Can you believe it?”
“Happy couch shopping, you two,” you laugh. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Love you.”
“Love you, bestie! Bye!”
You can’t help but smile when you hang up the phone.
“She’s gonna love having you back home again, isn’t she?”
“Oh, yeah. I can’t wait to see her more. I know she’s been so busy with her soulmate and me with work and with you, but I miss her like crazy. We text all the time, but it isn’t the same.”
“She knows about us, right?”
“Yeah,” you giggle. “She was the first person I told.”
“Thought so,” he laughs, pulling you back into his side. “Knew you wouldn’t be able to keep it from her for long.”
“She can practically read my mind. It was easier to avoid the truth over the phone, but the minute I saw her in person, I crumbled. She gives me this look, and I’m done for.”
Bucky chuckles fondly, pressing a kiss to your temple.
“I can’t wait to get to know her properly.”
“Oh, she’s gonna love you.”
“I hope so.”
“She will, trust me. She used to talk about how hot you were all the time. Pre-Cameron, of course.”
“I’m glad you’re finally getting to meet him.”
“Me too. I feel guilty, you know. It was the biggest moment of her life, and all of a sudden I’m up and leaving across the country, barely keeping in touch through scattered text messages. I was so wrapped up in you and in work, that I wasn’t there for her like I should have been.”
“I’m sure she’ll understand if you say this to her, honey baby. You have to remember that her Tethering was a lot less complicated than ours. They just got on with things, as easy as can be.”
“I guess you’re right,” you murmur into his chest. “I’ll tell her all of this when I see her tomorrow.”
He wraps both arms around you, pulling you impossibly closer. You relax instantly, the warmth of his skin and familiarity of his touch soothing you like melted honey.
Your phone rings again.
“I bet it’s Lacie moving the plans around,” you chuckle. “She always underestimates how long it takes her to get everything ready.”
You find your phone from under the cushion and answer it.
“Hi, sweetheart.”
“Mama?”
“Where are you?”
The sun disappears behind a cloud, sending a shiver down your spine.
“I’m at home.”
“I need you to go and get Bucky, and come to the hospital.”
Your heart stops in your chest, and Bucky has to breathe for the both of you.
“Why?” you ask, barely above a whisper.
“I’ll explain when you get here, but it’s more serious than we thought.”
She sounds scared, which in turn terrifies you. She’s the bravest person you know, your Mom. If she’s afraid, you know it’s bad.
“Okay,” you choke out. “I’m leaving right now. I, uh, I’ll get Bucky, and - do you need anything? Does Dad? I can bring whatever… whatever you need, what do you need?”
“Nothing, baby girl. Just you guys, for now, okay?”
“Okay. Yeah, okay. I, uh, I- I- I’ll leave right now. Where is he?”
“Follow the signs for Cardiology when you get here. Room 4.”
“He’s in a room? In a bed? Mama, please. What’s happening?”
You’ve never heard your voice sound so weak. You’re kicking yourself internally - you have to be strong for her. You need to be.
“Baby, just get here as soon as you can, okay? Get Bucky to drive. I love you.”
“I love you too. So much.”
You try to hang up the phone, but your hands are shaking so much that you’re unable to press the red button. Bucky does it for you, intertwining your fingers with his.
He pulls you to your feet, smoothing your hair back from your face.
“It’s all going to be okay, honey. Put your shoes on and grab your purse. I’ll get my keys.”
He kisses your forehead gently, letting his lips linger for a second before pulling you inside and shutting the balcony door.
He doesn’t let go of your hand the entire time, even as you drive to the hospital.
You feel like you’re drowning. Repeatedly slipping beneath the surface of the water, lungs heaving, desperate to stay afloat.
Bucky feels it, too. All he can do is hold your hand and hope for the best.
All he can do is hold your hand and hope for the best.
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tag list part one
@lillytracy6996 @securegorgon @roostersforevergirl @povlvr @val-writesstuff  @dreadfulxives18 @1deadpool26 @abbygraceasd @nyutasgirl @mavrellover91 @winterslove1917 @f-this42 @skewedcherries @noisesinthedark @kandis-mom @black-cat-2 @harrystylesandthegoobs @vladsgirlxx @h0nestly-though @arienotari @nash-dara @wandaneedstherapy @galaxy-dusk @justherefortheficandsmut @cremebruleequeen @cjand10 @buggy14 @avengers-fixation @blueberrybambi @beautiful-loserr @sarah1barnes @miss-rebel-without-applause @ragingrainbowshipl @shamrockqueen @savemeroman @jenn-f @8crazy-freak8 @daddyjackfrost @openup-yourmind @adangerousbalance @mandijo17 @daddylorianisastateofmind @rcarbo1 @casa-boiardi @spideegwen @navs-bhat @mssbridgerton @asuni921 @middle-of-the-earth @mfrnchsk
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outoftheseine · 4 months
Text
- BUCKY BARNES FIC RECS PART 3 -
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his strut, lord forgive me | some fics might have 18+ content so minors do not interact. | more will be added!
main masterlist | part 1 | part 2
SERIES - MULTI-CHAPTERS
break free • bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @james-bucky (angst, violence, comfort, smut)
honey girl • dbf!bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @violentdelightsandviolentends (age gap, soulmate au, smut, angst, fluff)
taken • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @antiquarianfics (angst, violence, kidnapping)
public affair | public display • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @kaznejis
you are mine, sunshine • grumpy!bodyguard!bucky barnes x sunshine!fem!reader
↳ by @theeleggymeggy
i never thought you'd happen to me | part 2 | part 3 • bucky barnes x curvy!reader
↳ by @nickfowlerrr (slight angst, mostly fluff, smut, luv itt)
against all odds | part 2 • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @bossbtch1
ONE-SHOTS - HC'S - BLURBS
you found me • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @samthemarvelfan (slight angst, fluff)
cry baby • bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @buckymorelikefuckme (smut, friends to lovers)
secret injury • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @lives-in-midgard
the collection • tfatws!bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @theeleggymeggy
better knock • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @buckysouvenir (flufff, implied smut)
suffocate me with your love • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @rocketrhap3000 (angst with happy ending, self-esteem problems)
always • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @nickfowlerrr (angst with happy ending)
contaminated • bucky barnes x agent!reader
↳ by @adrinktostopyourthirst (fluff)
finally • bucky barnes x spy!reader
↳ by @adrinktostopyourthirst (smut, fluff, angst)
curiosity killed the cat • mafia!bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @queers-gambit (angst, kidnapping, mean!bucky)
help me • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky (angst, bucky's ptsd, comfort)
his everything • bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @likeahorribledream (angst, fluff and insecure bucky)
the way he loves • bucky barnes x widow!reader
↳ by @lovelybarnes (aahh so fluffy so sweet)
patience • grumpy!bucky barnes x sunshine!reader
↳ by @sageandravens
it's called: freefall • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @kikixreverie
baking for bucky • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @itsplumwriter (so fluff, i wish i can bake for bucky too)
wrapped in affection • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @aikaterini-drag (very fluffy)
the signal • bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @lostgirlmuseum (angst, a misunderstanding)
first time • bucky barnes x gn!reader
↳ by @ivybucky
i was born ready • bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @whatthetumblfck (angst, kidnapping, ptsd?)
babysitting duty • bucky barnes x girlfriend!fem!reader
↳ by @nicoline1998enilocin (fluff)
here's looking at you, kid • boxer!bucky barnes x reader
↳ by @cryonme (angst, violence, tw: abuse)
knight in shining motorcycle • bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @queen-of-the-avengers (almost sa, slight angst, comfort)
verity • bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @cosmicbucky (angst, fluff, friends to lovers)
let it be known • mob!bucky barnes x bf!fem!reader
↳ by @kinanabinks
harvest heart • bucky barnes x fem!reader
↳ by @eloquentreverie (verry fluffy)
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samodivaa · 8 days
Text
frenzy of lust and sin 1〗
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Part 2 Pairing: Instructor!Bucky x Recruit!Reader
Summary: During your training to become an agent, you've earned the moniker "Sergeant's girl" around the base—that doesn't give him the right to be possessive or jealous, but what gives you the right to be a brat? Warnings: sexual tension, age gap, sparring Words: 3.4k
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Bucky knows that the body is not a thing of wild magic, but a collection of chemicals, tissues, and nerve impulses. Thoughts are no more than electrical surges in the brain. Sexual arousal is no more than a flow of chemicals to certain nerve endings. Sadness no more than a bit of acid transfixed in the cerebellum. In short, the body is a machine, subject to the same laws of electricity and mechanics as an electron or clock. As such, the body must be addressed in the language of physics. And if the body speaks, it is the speaking only of so many levers and forces. The body is a thing to be ordered, not obeyed. But the feeling is not leaving, he can’t control it. Jealousy. He is witnessing himself become daily more notable for savage sullenness and ferocity. But in the end, it’s an instinctive feeling. Your presence has flattered him from the first time you met, you are full of ambition which leads Bucky to adopt a double character without exactly intending to deceive anyone.
He keeps the acquaintance and has no temptation to show his rough side in your company, and has the sense to be ashamed of being rude towards such a young lady. You are the only recruit who gets this side of him, but it is a secret in his heart, he is guilty of such a secret, because he has to forcefully hold it. He keeps his hold on his affections towards you unalterably, not showing what he is truly feeling. With all his superiority as your hand to hand combat instructor, he finds it difficult to keep it professional as more time passes. As he falls more for you. ============================== The moment you enter the room, he discerns your soft-featured face, pensive and amiable in expression, eyes which are large and serious, your figure almost too graceful. It forms a sweet picture―and your aura. It's…intoxicating. It's shining, it always shines. 
“Good morning, Bucky” you have a sweet, low manner of speaking as you walk towards where he is sitting. “Good morning” his voice sounds ill-natured, politeness that would only be laughed at, restraining an unruly nature, wary of the secret he knows about you. He is trying to not be overcome by emotion. Emotion is the art of breaking hearts, minds, and tongues―but it is too much, even for Bucky.
You reflect for an instant, with knitted brows “Are you okay?” “Of course I am, why do you ask?” he whispers crossly.
A surprised laugh almost breaks free from your lips, because his naturally reserved disposition is exaggerated into an almost idiotic excess of moroseness today and you wonder why that is. Bucky slightly widening his eyes, parts of his lips, but there is absence of arrogance as his features become unreadable again. He rises up from the bench, but you have no time to express your worry further as you gaze at him with a troubled countenance, because it might be something deeper. ==============================
It is all because of three days ago.
As he carries his basket to the laundry room, he spots a look for a washing machine with a finished cycle. He opens the door and unloads the freshly washed clothes, placing them into the basket in front of the machine―but these clothes are familiar. Leggings, he knows them by heart. Curiosity is gluttony. It is a great temptation to look through all of them, piece by piece. And although his demeanor is calm, his eyes betray a maelstrom of emotions—his self-control is shattering. The impulse lurks. His gaze moves downwards. To his crotch. Jesus. He is hard. And sometimes, to regain sanity, he has to acknowledge and embrace the madness. Bucky wavers for a moment, and then, irresistibly impelled by the naughty spirit within him, sits on the floor and finds a red dress underneath the leggings―curiosity sparking in his eyes as his lids to twinkle, because he has never imagine you wearing such feminine clothing. Until now. He wants to see the curve of your back, the dress clinging to your chest and waist, flaring over your hips—and certainly wants to look at your tits in it.
“Fuck”  His throat gurgles slightly, looking at the cloth through his lashes like the starved man he is. It is almost impossible to express himself out loud, satisfaction speaks louder than words. He is overwhelmed by emotions, leaving him both speechless and breathless, but even then it is important to identify the correct emotion—lust, a longing that goes on a loop. He neglects his throbbing cock, but his attention remains the dress as he falls victim to countless daydreams.
There is scarcely time to experience a thrill of his arousal before he sees something else—male boxers. He stands stunned. Paralyzed. Breathless. But there is no time for inaction. His mind floods as he tries to make sense of what he is seeing.
—Men are punished by their sins, not for them.
Seeing the boxers, he speaks of lust in the past tense. The scene that plays in front of him, is perfectly adapted to a temporal phenomenon: distinct, abrupt, framed—illusions are bound to be shattered, reality finally sets in. An indescribable look flits across his face, because that sparks his anger. It is so wrong to feel like this, yet he is firmly persuaded that a great deal of his consciousness, in fact, is a disease, the more deeply it sinks into that mire and the more ready he is to sink in it altogether—Jealousy. He hates those insoluble problems and contradictions of human nature, and that he is capable of conquering his fragile inner center—only silence remains. To take back his power in any given situation, he needs to focus on the things he can control. The thoughts he chooses to think is usually the best place to begin, but by a natural impulse his mind starts to wonder—about this man kissing you, touching you, fucking you. 
==============================
That’s how his unusual behavior is fueled, expressed, plainer than words could do, the intense anguish at having made himself the instrument of opposing his own jealousy. You enter the room and he is already waiting for you and as you approach the bench where he is sitting, he is  supposing you are going to say something, looking up. The expression of his face seems disturbed and anxious as three days ago, lips are half asunder, as if he wants to speak, and draws a breath, but it escapes with a sigh instead of a normal sentence.
“You know, relationships are not allowed here” “What are you talking about?” you pursue, kneeling down by him and lifting your winsome eyes to his face with that sort of look which turns off bad temper, even when it is right in his own world to indulge it. “It is part of the rules, you sighed it” he goes on, less sulkily. “Yeah and I am not in a relationship” you respond, peevishly rising to your feet.  “You just slept with some random guy?” “It is not against the rules” you exclaim in an irritated tone, chafing your hands together and frowning.
“So how was the sex?”  he asks too casually, his countenance growing graver. Bucky has an unusual gloom in his face, that makes you dread something from which you might shape a prophecy, and foresee a fearful catastrophe. Will he expel you from the training program?
“What do you mean?” you ask, with an accent of indignation. “How was it” he asks, emphasizing each syllable “When he fucked you?” —Jealous makes tongue unconscious
You avoid aggravating his fiery temper by staying silent, not knowing what attendees his anger and the curiosity of your personal life. His behavior today provokes you exceedingly, but you lay the blame on his latest mission which was a disaster. He doesn’t have power to conceal his emotions anymore, it sets his whole complexion in a blaze. Bucky rises from the bench, scoops up his water bottle, takes a long gulp from it  and impatiently bades you to go to the training mats, terminating the conversation with a sequel of horrid imprecations in his mind. You know that It is as much a part of him as his limbs, this need to make sure that you are safe, to protect you. But this is the first time that he hasn't been so kind to you. And you remember a definition of chivalry you’d heard once: a man protecting a woman against every man but himself. Through the madness of his words, a part of his soul is revealed—a part of him that has to do with the past. Even if people around him try to forget it, the past remembers him. That void in his chest fills with anger sometimes and it is scary to witness it.
You don’t want to spar with him, but you won’t back down either—back and forth you go, shifting your feet and moving across the mat like some wild, ferocious tango. It is exhilarating to be moving like this with you, so close Bucky can see your eyebrows pinched together in concentration, little drops of sweat as they run down your face. Then it happens. You couldn’t get your arms up in time and Bucky’s next kick hit you squarely in the side. The attempt to conceal the pain doesn’t work as you feel all the strength go out of you as your back hits the ground hard. In a second he gets on top, which makes you wriggle and squirm, trying to throw him off. He grins down at you, enjoying his momentary superiority and the feeling of your smaller body underneath his. You don’t let the mental block or panic control you, ideas flow so rapidly that you have not time to decide what to do—you scowl adorably and arch up against him in a way that sends electricity through him—and that unbalances him enough for you to flip him over and straddle him.  —He is a mournful wreck ruined by his biggest weakness, you. You are on top now, pinning him, grinning down with sparkling eyes. He is exasperated, because he doesn’t know what this look means. He put it somewhere between indifference and pride. Your eyes are so intense he wants to look away—or never look away, he can’t decide, but he keeps his gaze fixed on you as if you fear that you would vanish if he is to remove it. To his shock, the heavy breathing, the rush of adrenaline and endorphins, the intense stare, the rivulets of sweat, arouses him even more. 
“It was nice” you declare, emphatically, speaking sincerely “The sex was nice” you add in a tone particularly calculated to provoke him. 
You seem to allow yourself such wide latitude with both your actions and words today, it really leaves him speechless and you laugh at his reaction as if you are inclined to make it no laughing matter to Bucky. When your eyes meet his gaze as you are staring at each other, time stops. Those eyes are piercing yours, and you can swear at this moment you sense something more. It surprises you that he doesn’t say anything in return. You are not used to seeing Bucky like that—without the attitude, without the facade. He tries to conceal his reaction from you, but his face grows cloudy at your reply, his heart grows pale with pure annoyance: a feeling that reaches its climax when you silently rise and leave the room as Bucky ponderes your reply painfully. He would not have wanted to hear of staying a second longer anyways. ============================== It is a continual nightmare. He needs several days off from all training sessions to meditate on his thoughts in solitude. He persuades his conscience that in a way it is not his fault as possessiveness is a problem, rooted in his ill-bred past―he suffers greatly, because of the brainwashing, torture, his mind struggles between disorder and order, trying to find a balance between the two extremes. 
But he can't keep on running, he needs to face one of his biggest problems―for all his time that he has spent with you, he couldn't avert that excess of emotion: mingled possessiveness and jealousy has overcome him completely lately. The nearer he gets to the facility the more agitated he becomes and on catching sight of it he trembles in every limb. You are young, beautiful and there is something contagious when you act like a brat, it takes root in him and his desire grows along with him―your presence is a moral poison that contaminates his whole mind.  —There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable. You are forbidden. Young. His best trainee.
============================== You are already sitting on the bench and turn around when the door opens. Eye contact. How can he mitigate his adoration for you when he can't concentrate half the time he is around you?
“Good morning, Bucky” 
You say with feigned playfulness and he notices a mischievous smile on your lips. As if you are on hostile terms with him, but still somehow friendly. And what amuses you is painful to him beyond expression―he doesn’t say anything in return, but sits next to you, and looks thoroughly indifferent as he takes the water bottle out of his backpack. It is normal thought, you are alarmed at his recent indiscretion, and the disclosure he had made of his behavior in a transient fit of anger. Bucky is sick with conflict, possessive emotions fester in him while this sludge, guilt, eats away at his insides and he is acutely conscious of the swift passage of time. ―He needs to say something. Finish the session and go home. It is that simple.
And he stares hard at you, watching you take a long drink from your bottle. Then he follows the flick of your tongue over your bottom lip. His heart stumbles a beat. What the actual fuck. Was that on purpose―he has come here to train you and once again, he is left speechless. Then. You lean in, your scent filling his nostrils. He is shocked to feel his throat tighten with a primal hunger, just to hear: “Don’t you like me?”
You laugh softly, utterly feminine sound that galvanizes all of his senses. You lean closer, allowing Bucky to savor the sweet, sinful energy which shimmers from you―some primitive male instinct warns him of your innocence―like a bloom on a vine, fragrant and dainty. He scowles―don’t pinch it off. His heart knows no peace, because everything is wrong with having feelings for you.   *What is she playing at? Is she trying to provoke me? It's working*
“It's not that I don’t like you, it's only that in your presence I don’t like myself”  he speaks without any anger in his voice, but with much sorrowful despondency.
Now, you are the one left speechless, but manage to preserve your external composure, in spite of his ghastly countenance and strange confession. You find childish diversion in the idea of pulling his mental strings―you struggle desperately to not smile as your mind obsessively plays and replays his words, your eyes narrow into thin slits as your gaze doesn’t leave his, because your suspicions are confirmed, he likes you. That describes his change of habitual conduct. A hideous notion strikes you, how wonderful it would be to use the satisfying exhibitions of power and control to deliberately create more desire in him―only to capriciously deny it. It is clear that he doesn’t know that you are a virgin if he accuses you of sleeping with other men. The question is―what exactly provoked him? But your abstraction is evidently so deep, and your whole aspect so misanthropical that Bucky thinks how uncomfortable you might be feeling. He reflects that all those words will be branded in his memory, and they eat him deeply, eternally, because he should have not said them. All because of his greedy jealousy. He looks astonished at the expression on your face, only assuming what you might be thinking of him―he gazes at you with mournful and questioning eagerness, clearly on the verge of madness. He endeavors to say something, but can’t manage it which makes him compress his mouth as he holds a silent combat with his inward shame, meanwhile, your mind offers a perfect plan. 
“Do you want to kiss me?”  
You whisper, anxiously, yet boldly―mesmerized by the tiny flecks of indigo in his blue eyes—you can drown in those eyes and it wouldn’t be the worst way to go. His beautiful features offer themselves to your gaze as you trail through them, annoyed at how attractive he is. You feel stuffy, there is not enough air to breathe as his eyes stare at your lips for a few moments.
“Watch that mouth” 
A wicked curve appears on his lips, because your pure innocence is a kind of insanity to his mind that sees in scattered images of varying vulgarity. Kiss you? He wants to fuck you. You are so impetuous and bold―addictive. “Or what? You will kiss it?”
You say which makes you glance up to find his eyes blazing with raw need. Innocent and virtuous, you represent the exact type of female he needs to avoid…“Or I will fuck it”―ugh, he can’t say that, but he wants to. God, he feels so naked knowing you have clearly identified his desire for you. He can’t go any further down. Rock bottom. His mind is a mess, but he has no intention of cleaning today. You lean, but before he can say anything you lean back and smile, leaving him to grapple with an absurd sense of disappointment. Teasing Bucky is part of the fun that comes before kissing—oh, you will for sure ruin him long before you touch him. It will be more satisfying to exhibit power and control than deliberately creating desire—only to capriciously deny it. His smile is faint and lopsided, his answer takes a long time, which is uncharacteristic: “Don’t do that again” Bucky’s voice is measured, his longing raw. Self control is all he has left. His face feels scattered in pieces and he can’t not keep it straight. The feeling is a whole lot worse than being hungry for any dinner, yet it is like that. All he can think about―is you. “Why? What will you do?” Your laughter sounds like music, you just  can’t miss a chance to remind him what a brat you are and that's when a sense of his folly compels him to mutter: “Why don’t you really keep your mouth shut?” You guess he utters those words, at least, though his voice is hardly intelligible. You know his voice well, bright and brittle, but now it has the thinnest layer of ice over―you know that he feels guilty about liking you. His question is an attempt to repress the intensity of your delight. He looks at you with a droll expression―half angry, half laughing at your boldness. “Why don’t you-” your exhalation carries a rasping tremor as if holding back a giggle “-give my mouth something else to do?” His mouth gaps, but no sound comes out. He stares at you, with a grin hovering about his lips, and a scowl gathering over his eyes:
“I have no words” he articulates softly. “Bucky…” you tease him  “You always have something to say” And yet, he freezes stiff, as if he has been pushed onstage in a play where he doesn't know the lines―God, you’ve broken him. You’ve managed to render him speechless―Dominance. Control. These things are the roots of Bucky’s character. And you are the first person to defy his dominance and to challenge his self control. What a languid woman, a force of gravity by which you irresistibly make him speechless—and at the same time, fuel a new side to him. Eye contact. There is more in the eyes. Longing. The naughtiness emanates from your eyes—you look at him like you own him, openly teasing him as if it’s normal. And now you know that he needs you. This scarred, broken man needs you...and you want to be there for him. There is a silent promise not to let his secret out, but there is no promise for not teasing him purposely from now on—you jolt at the knowledge that you are instilling his inner peace to such an extent. 
Part 2
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Did I Make You Proud?
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Character: Spy!Bucky x Rogue!Spy Female Reader
Summary: Imagine being a rogue agent, relentlessly pursued by your irresistibly attractive former mentor, Bucky, who is determined to track you down.
Main Masterlist || support: Ko-fi
Thank you to everyone who has read this chapter. Leave a comment and Reblog, please. I'd love to hear your thoughts. ❤️
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Bucky P.O.V
Bucky's gaze flicked up to the intercom as the voice crackled through, laden with stress. "Did you see her?"
He sighed, the weight of the crowded train station bearing down on him. "Too many people here," he muttered, his frustration evident in the terse response.
"I never thought she would betray us. We have to find her before they do," came the voice from the intercom, laden with frustration.
Bucky ran a hand through his hair, a gesture of frustration mirroring the tone on the intercom.
It was understandable why tensions ran high in the spy agency; one of their own had gone rogue, becoming a fugitive and leaving chaos in their wake.
And to make matters worse, the rogue agent is you.
The senior agent, Bucky received a direct order to apprehend the rogue agent. He was the one who had trained and guided you.
The situation's urgency hit him like a wave as he grasped the gravity of the rogue agent's actions. You had obtained sensitive data from a secret base and were planning to sell it to another country, triggering a potential international crisis.
"BANG."
The explosion erupted from the toilet, sending shockwaves through the crowded area.
"KYAA!!!" Panic spread like wildfire as people scrambled everywhere except for Bucky.
He remained calm amidst the chaos, a knowing look in his eyes as he recognized the familiar tactic. He had taught you well – create a distraction but ensure no civilians get hurt. It was a motto they lived by.
As his colleagues and the soldiers mobilized to locate the source of the explosion, Bucky's focus was unwavering. His gaze swept over the frantic crowd until, finally, he spotted you.
There you were, a smirk playing on your lips as you sat inside the cafe directly across from him.
A wave of conflicting emotions washed over Bucky – relief at finally finding you, the rogue agent, mingled with disappointment and a touch of regret.
Despite the agencies hot on your trail, you exuded an air of confidence, leisurely sipping your coffee as if you hadn't a care in the world. Bucky's jaw clenched with determination as he observed you from afar, his fist tightening as he made his way towards your location.
As he anticipated, you had vanished from the cafe, but your signature perfume lingered in the air, serving as a tantalizing clue. Trusting his instincts, Bucky followed the scent until he spotted you boarding a train.
With a quickened pace, he hurried to catch up, his steps purposeful as he entered the same carriage as you. The doors closed behind them, sealing their fate within the confines of the train.
"Bucky, what are you doing?" the intercom crackled with concern.
Bucky's hand moved swiftly to remove the device from his ear, slipping it into his pocket as he met your gaze with steely resolve. "I found her," he declared, his voice firm as he prepared to confront the rogue agent face to face.
Bucky quickened his pace, determination driving his strides as he reached out and grabbed your hand, pulling you closer to the quiet area of the train.
"Stop what you're doing. Do you want to get caught and be a prisoner in another country?" he pleaded, his voice laced with urgency and concern.
You shrugged nonchalantly, seeming unfazed by the consequences. "As long as I get paid," you replied, a hint of indifference in your tone.
Bucky's grip tightened as he looked into your eyes, searching for any sign of recognition. "This isn't you," he insisted, his voice tinged with desperation.
Pushing away his hand, you retorted, "What happened to 'no strings attached'?"
Bucky grumbled in frustration, feeling the weight of his own words haunting him. Perhaps you were right; he shouldn't have let himself worry about you.
But memories flooded his mind – the nights spent together, sharing warmth on cold evenings, and when you pretended to be husband and wife. Those days held a special place in his heart, now overshadowed by your betrayal.
"You... you were different," he muttered, struggling to reconcile the person he once knew with the rogue agent before him.
With a smirk, you met his gaze defiantly. "Because of you and the agency pushing my limits, I've learned my true value," you declared, your confidence unwavering.
"I'm a good spy."
Bucky couldn't deny the truth in your words. Despite the circumstances, there was no denying your skill as a spy. You had learned from the best – him.
As tension crackled between them, a mixture of frustration, longing, and unresolved emotions hung in the air, a testament to the complex relationship they once shared.
Bucky's voice was stern as he demanded, "Where's the data?"
You met his gaze with defiance, a smirk playing on your lips. "Too late. Before you guys found me at the train station, I already handed it over to the buyer."
The weight of your words hung heavily in the air as Bucky processed the gravity of the situation. "Do you even realize what you've done?" he asked, his tone tinged with disbelief.
You shrugged casually, a flicker of intensity in your eyes. "Can't you see the big picture? If there's only peace, people like us won't exist. I'm just here to keep it alive," you retorted, your confidence palpable, starkly contrasting to the timid and quiet persona he once knew.
Bucky fell silent, taken aback by the transformation before him. You had evolved into someone both confident and alluring, your newfound demeanor leaving him both impressed and unsettled.
You sensed his internal struggle and couldn't resist teasing him further. "Did I make you proud?" you inquired, tilting your head provocatively and adding a coy "Sir?" to the end of your question.
A mischievous glint danced in your eyes as you continued, "Or perhaps you'd rather catch me and handcuff me to your bed?"
Bucky's patience wore thin as he reached out, his fingers pinching your chin to meet his gaze. Leaning in closer, he captured your lips in a passionate kiss filled with unspoken tension.
The kiss spoke volumes, a collision of conflicting emotions – desire, frustration, and longing – all wrapped up in a single moment of intimacy.
As Bucky pulled away, his voice was low and authoritative. "Don't test my patience," he warned, his eyes burning with a mixture of warning and undeniable desire.
You let out a low, almost amused hum. "Hmm... I know."
The train whisked them away, racing across the bridge with breathtaking scenery flashing by. In a different circumstance, perhaps they could have appreciated the view together. But now, they were locked in a tense standoff.
"We should meet again," you remarked, breaking the silence.
Bucky's brow furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean?"
You offered no explanation, but a sense of unease prickled at Bucky's senses. He tensed, feeling a presence behind him, and his suspicions were confirmed when he turned to find seven men poised for a fight.
"Really?" Bucky shot you a disbelieving look as you shrugged nonchalantly.
"I need something to stall the time. I'll see you again, Sir." You turned and bolted with that, leaving Bucky to face the onslaught alone. He braced himself, ready to take on the challenge.
The fight was fierce, a whirlwind of punches and kicks as Bucky engaged in a battle of wits and strength. Despite being outnumbered, his training and skill allowed him to emerge victorious.
As he dealt the final blow, the sound of a helicopter overhead drew his attention. Bucky sighed, realizing that this was your escape plan unfolding.
When the train finally came to a halt, Bucky found himself surrounded by his agency colleagues, their expressions a mix of disappointment and frustration.
"She got away?" one of them asked, voicing the collective sentiment.
Bucky could only nod grimly. "Yup."
"Shit."
The frustration simmered within Bucky as he slid his hand into his jacket pocket, feeling something unexpected. With a quick glance, he pulled out a small item, his cheeks flushing crimson as he recognized it. It was undoubtedly your doing, a teasing reminder of your audacity.
Despite his frustration, Bucky couldn't deny the thrill of the chase, the challenge you presented only fueling his determination to catch you.
With a silent vow, Bucky steeled himself for the subsequent encounter. He would find you; this time, you wouldn't slip through his fingers so easily.
🚁
As you reached the top of the stairs, panting slightly from the exhilarating climb from the moving train, thrill and nervousness danced in your veins. 
Clara, your partner in crime and the helicopter pilot shook her head in disbelief. "I knew you wanted to make a cool exit for your hot former mentor, but this has to stop," she chided a hint of exasperation in her tone.
"Climbing up from a moving train? You might as well have signed your own death warrant," Clara continued, her eyes wide with concern.
You flashed her a mischievous grin, trying to brush off the seriousness of the situation. "I just wanted to impress him," you admitted, your voice laced with a hint of sheepishness.
Clara sighed, knowing all too well how to handle your impulsive tendencies. "Maybe next time, just kidnap him and live on a private island. Then you two can live happily ever after," she suggested with a playful wink.
You chuckled at the absurdity of her suggestion but couldn't help but entertain the thought. "That's not a bad idea. I should save money to buy an island," you mused, already picturing the two of you lounging on a tropical beach, far away from the chaos of the spy world.
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espinosaurusrexex · 1 month
Text
Remember Me
WinterSoldier!BuckyBarnes x Female!Reader
summary: After a fight against the most notorious Hydra agent of all, Steve and you discover that your assumed diseased friend Bucky is still alive. Old wounds resurface as you are confronted with the grappling reality that you have lived vastly different lives for the past 70 years. Will he remember your shared history? And most importantly: does he still feel the same?
word count: 3.1k
a/n: Just a short piece that I managed to finish. I know it's not a lot, but I hope you enjoy anyway 💕
warnings: a bunch of fluff and angst, mentions of war, mentions of sexism, swearing, Bucky is really broken in this one, happy ending (:
・゚✫* 𝒎𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 。✭・゚
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“Proceed with caution, unidentified shooter on bridge. I repeat: unidentified shooter. It is not clear what the motive is. Take cover and shoot on sight.”
“Dispatch, this is Captain America - we’ll take it from here.”
“With all due respect, Cap, I will keep my men on site to keep your cover.”
“I appreciate it.”
“Least I can do for you, sir.”
“Stop chatting it up with the police and do your job, Rogers.”
“Alright, alright.”
You chuckled and turned to Tony. “How long are we out?”
“Three minutes, 46 seconds.” 
“You gonna survive that long, Stevie?”
“That guy’s got a good aim on him, gotta give him that.”
Muffled noises pushed through your earpiece before you stepped into the back of the Quinjet to gear up. 
“Can’t let him do anything. It’s one guy they’re fighting... one.”
“Yeah, one Hydra-trained assassin who’s apparently immortal and got more deaths on his record than Romanoff.”
You huffed as the meeting recollected in your mind. The Winter Soldier had been the newest pain in the Avenger’s asses ever since you discovered that Hydra was still operating in the shadows of S.H.I.E.L.D. 
“They’re just making a show out of everything, huh?” 
You strapped your gloves over your wrists and watched as Tony chuckled in the pilot seat. You and him had become good friends over the past few years. Ever since you and Steve had been discovered in the frozen airship of what you had thought to be your last mission about 70 years ago, you and Captain America had woken up in a vastly different world. One through which Howard’s son, Tony, gladly guided you. 
Both you and Steve were overwhelmed by the amount of changes the world had endured while you had soundly served your time as human popsicles, though Captain America seemed to struggle a little more with 21st-century technology and norms. 
It was fine, Steve had always been a little old-fashioned, even back in the day. You for one were delighted to learn about all the opportunities the world had to offer for women and other people who couldn’t have dreamed of any in the 40s. Because while Steve was celebrated for being the face of hope for the American people, you were still dodging snide comments doubting your place in the Army. And while you tried not to let anyone see the toll it took on you, it was the reason for enough nights you spent with Peggy sharing stories over a bottle of wine. 
You both decided the important men in your life should never find out. Though, of course, your not-so-secret didn’t stay hidden from Bucky for long. Which was one of the reasons you had jumped on that plane with Steve. Even when Bucky was already dead. Even when Steve was still oblivious. You constantly needed to prove yourself. But this one time, it had actually changed something – well, time had. 
You shook your head free of that thought and walked towards the cargo hatch. Tony had landed the Quinjet – it was go time. 
“Ready?”
“That guy won’t know what happened to him when we’re done with him.”
“Let’s rock his world, then,” Tony winked before his helmet closed and he flew out of the jet. You were close behind him, running the short distance from the ramp to the bridge from which you swung yourself off with a grappling hook. 
“What’s the status?”
“I’ve been shot.”
“I’ve got it, Bearcat check on Steve. He looks ridiculously helpless.”
“Roger that,” you sprinted towards the two fighting men on the street, as the Winter soldier threw Steve to the ground, his shield nowhere to be seen. 
“Okay, my turn.” You stepped in front of him, analyzing his movements, and dodging punches, trying to get some in yourself. 
“Oh come on, that’s not fair.” You huffed when he took a knife out of your leg holster and almost acrobatically threw it over your head just to graze your cheek with the blade. 
He had knocked off your guns at this point, leaving you with choking wire and some smaller daggers in your jacket. When he turned the right angle, you jumped his shoulders and locked your thighs around his neck, kicking the knife out of his hand and watching as he ripped your choking wire in half. Damn.
“Now, that’s not nice.” You threw the torn metal to the side as The winter soldier struggled to get you off him. A look to Steve told you he had a new plan, and with a short nod, you signaled your understanding to him. 
“But if you wanna be like that...” Steve threw you his shield and in a swift motion you managed to drag it over the soldier's head. He pushed his metal arm forward just in time, though your hit had already knocked the mask off his face. 
When the shield came down, you heard Steve’s footsteps halt next to you, the world going quiet. 
Your stomach churned when you watched blue eyes twitch between the dark smudges. Familiar and oh-so strange at the same time. 
“Bucky?” Steve stammered, and at the sound of his name, goosebumps rippled over your skin. 
The Winter Soldier’s look darkened before he reached for a gun. “Who the hell is Bucky?”
From then on, the day seemed like a blur. You remembered Sam knocking Bucky down and the lot of you flying back to the compound on standby. Steve was functioning a lot better than you were, considering the man you thought to be dead for over 70 years was currently handcuffed to a handrail on your jet. 
James “Bucky” fucking Barnes. Captain America’s best friend, founding member of the howling commandos, infamous war hero apparently turned assassin, and the man who stole your heart somewhere along the way. 
You dared a glance at the chained-up, unconscious brunette in the corner as Steve sat down next to you, a calming hand squeezing your shoulder. 
“Can I get you anything?”
You ignored him. “How are you not freaking out?” You whispered through glassy eyes instead. 
Steve’s expression softened when he pulled you into his chest, his other hand pressing your head further into him. His heart was hammering beneath his ribcage, his fingers cold to the touch. 
“I am. Just trying to be a captain.” His voice was strained when he mumbled into your hair. 
You just nodded in understanding, finding comfort in the fact you weren’t the only one feeling this way. 
❁ ❁ ❁
You watched him through the glass of the interrogation room with your arms crossed before your chest. Buck was sitting at the table, his head hung low, his dark hair falling in wet stands into his face. He didn’t move a muscle. For half an eternity, he stared at the table his wrists were chained to, almost statue-like. But when he finally looked up, you could see the confusion and nervousness in his ocean-blue eyes. 
They had given him time to recover, to shower, and feel like a human again. They forced him into normal clothes and offered him a bed to sleep. But it wasn’t enough. The man you were looking at was terrified and lost - exhausted and overwhelmed. 
Bucky visibly tensed when the door opened and Steve stepped into his sight. They spent the next hour reconstructing his past. Steve told him how he had ended up in the 21st century and by the end of their conversations, the tension was a lot less static.
“She’s alive,” Bucky stated and tore his eyes away from Steve to look at the one-way glass.
“She’s a tough one. Survived the crash without super soldier serum and came out of the ice just as unharmed as I did.” 
“What are the odds?” Bucky chuckled bitterly. “What are the fucking odds we all end up together again?” 
Steve only gifted his friend a sympathetic smile along with a squeeze to his shoulder. “Take it as a chance.”
“Feels like a punishment.” 
They were locking eyes and even though you were watching the interaction from the outside, you could feel the atmosphere turn somber. The men were staring at each other in silence for a while, though you knew there was an entire discussion happening in their eyes.
“Does she... does she want to see me?” Bucky’s voice was hesitant and broken. And you couldn’t help but somehow imagine a different question nestled in his words. 
You almost had to stop yourself from touching the glass with your hands, wanting to tell him that you were already seeing him - really seeing him. 
“Why don’t you ask her yourself?” Steve stood and with a last smile to Bucky, he exited the room. 
This was it. The door was open. The love of your life sitting only a few feet from it. Though it seemed like he was trapped inside another’s body. 
“I’ll give you some privacy,” Steve murmured as he stood in the doorway looking at you by the window. And you just nodded, trying to suppress your pulse rushing in your ears. 
“Thanks.” It was only a whisper. You weren’t used to your voice being this small. And Steve didn’t seem so either. He was looking at you with sad eyes, fists clenched by his sides. There was nothing he could do to make you feel better. Not this time. And he seemed to know so. With one last tight smile, he sent a short nod your way and then left. 
❁ ❁ ❁
Bucky didn’t look at you when you finally built up the courage to step inside his room. He was much bigger than you remembered. Thick muscles adorned his arms and shoulders. Shaggy, longer hair fell from his head and over his scrunched brows. His left arm was entirely of metal, a red star reminding him who had taken claim to him several decades ago. 
If you hadn’t known, the man before you had almost no resemblance to the soldier you loved in 1941. He had been lean and full of life. He was broken now. And you were terrified someone had taken the very thing from him that would keep him from becoming himself again. 
Without a word you approached Bucky, cupped his hands with yours, and undid the restraints that tied him to the table. And this was the first time he looked at you. Really looked at you. Bucky’s piercing blue stare was full of awe and sorrow, a deep pain etched beneath the grey flecks within the vibrant color. 
You sat down beside him. 
“Hey.” Your voice was shaky, dragging a long silence in its wake that only made your heart beat faster. 
“Hello,” Bucky finally whispered, breaking the spell. His voice was a raw timbre, like a long-forgotten melody. And so much more tangible now that you weren’t listening to it through a speaker. 
But that was it. Neither of you spoke afterward. 
There was so much that could have been said, so much that could have been exchanged, known, explored about the other. And yet it didn’t feel like any of the words known to you were enough to break the static tension in the room. You were just looking at Bucky, scanning every part of his body like it was a flash card for the most important test of your life. 
So, here you were: With the opportunity of a lifetime right at your fingertips and the confidence of a kicked puppy settled deep in your wounded soul. The person you had known for the longest looked so timid as if he were looking at a stranger. Not that he had ever been shy about strangers back in the day. But this was different. This was strange and beautiful, and scary, and exciting. No book in the world held the answers as to what to do in this situation. 
And the solution was so easy: you just had to say something. So why didn’t your damn mouth open?
The speaker above your heads crackled and then Tony’s voice rang through the room. And for the first time in what felt like hours, a tiny bit of the weight on your shoulders lifted with it. “Bearcat, If you don’t open your mouth and put the guy out of his misery in 5 seconds, I’ll personally mediate this incredibly static confrontation.”
You rolled your eyes and then glared at the mirror, knowing full well Tony was watching you despite your asking him to leave. You mouthed a ‘shut it’ towards the glass and then turned in shock when a familiar voice rose from the silence.”
“Bearcat?”
You stared at Bucky with soft eyes. There was an innocence in the way he slowly guided this conversation - almost like he’d always had. It was an easy question, a nice entry to the heavier stuff that was bound to be discussed. 
And just as you began to explain, it dawned on you how much you had missed about each other. How differently your life could have been if it weren’t for the cruel turn of fate.
“When Steve and I were discovered, S.H.I.E.L.D. was our home for a long time. They tried to put us in apartments, even set us up with chaperones to guide us through the new century.” Bucky looked intrigued, even leaning forth as he listened intently. You wondered if he ever realized how much time had passed when he was the winter soldier... if anyone ever cared to tell him. “But it wasn’t until I met Natasha that I felt like I had arrived. She showed me so many things and trained with me until I became an agent here. Howard’s son came up with the nickname. He reminds me of him.” You smiled and shook your head “He’s a pain in my ass but a genius that can be genuinely helpful even though I don’t want to admit it at times. I haven’t grasped the explanation fully, but apparently, my fast learning and efficiency when it came to fighting reminded him of one of those small powerful fighter jets that were finished just after the war.” You chuckled at the memory before your eyes found Becky’s again only to see pain all over his face. 
A silent tear rolled down his cheek and hit the floor before you could see it stain his skin. “I'm so sorry.” His voice was shaking, his body trying to make itself smaller but failing miserably with all the muscle surrounding it. He took up the room and your heart right along with it.
“Hey you have nothing to apologize for, you hear me.” You cradled his face and his hands instantly covered yours, only for his metal one to retract just as fast again. He was sorrowful and it made your heart ache. 
“You’ve been navigating through so much alone and this is yet another thing you had to do without me.” He confessed through his tears and squeezed his eyes shut. He hadn’t changed within - always caring for everyone around him and never putting himself first.
“I’m fine. Was then and am now.” You ensured him. “If you want to worry about someone, take Steve. He’s a lot more overwhelmed than I am.” Bucky chuckled through his tears, a deep seriousness settling in his eyes. “If anything, I’m sorry we didn’t save you sooner.”
He shook his head. “You couldn’t have known.” And there it was: a glimpse of the loving, caring, charming man you’d known so many years ago. A small smile snuck onto your face at the revelation and a spark of hope shot through your body. 
“I haven’t stopped thinking about you,” you confessed, "We never had the time to actually be just us. To live all the dreams we shared back then.” 
Bucky's eyes were full of sorrow before he closed them and pressed his forehead to yours. “I wish I could say I missed you,” he whispered and slung his arm around you, “But I didn’t remember.”
“And that’s not your fault, you hear me.” Your hand stroked over his damp hair, pulling it back and making Bucky look at you again. “None of this is your fault. Don’t you ever doubt yourself. What happened to you is horrible. And I vow to kill every single person responsible for keeping us apart for this long. But not once will anyone ever consider this your fault.”
Bucky averted his eyes and turned his head but you were quick to catch his face with your hand. “Promise me you won’t beat yourself up. Please. That’s all I ask of you. Let Steve and me handle the rest and focus on becoming comfortable in your skin again. I can’t wait to meet the man you can become.”
“You don’t want to know me, doll. Not anymore. Even if it wasn’t my fault, it changed me. I’m not the man you-“ he stopped talking as you watched regret flash over his features. “I don’t think I can give you what you deserve.”
“I don’t care what I deserve, Bucky. I want you. I always have and that won’t change because some bullies tried to brainwash you. The very fact that we are here talking like this shows how much stronger you are than them. How the good in you never wavered.”
“But I can’t even trust myself. How can I expect you to do so of me?”
You cradled his head harsher as you felt your own tears roll down your cheek. “All I need is for you to try and trust me. We’ll figure this out... like we always do.”
Bucky’s flesh hand had fallen to your thigh, a soft thumb stroking over your leg and he watched the movement in awe. You didn’t know how long it had been since he had last felt comfort but you were determined to make up for all the lost time. With the wild beating of your heart, you took his metal hand and laved your fingers with his, watching as Bucky’s eyes glued to your smaller hand in his. There was no fear of what could happen, no aversion towards the alien element attached to his body. And then, finally, he encased your hand with his silver fingers. 
Your other hand still stroked his cheek and you waited until he caught your gaze again. And once he did, you did not hesitate to slowly push your lips to his. 
Just a short, sweet kiss. One that held more words than you could ever say. And then you waited. What for? Maybe a rejection, the shake of his head, or the sheer confidence with which he used to kiss you decades back. 
Bucky’s breaths were shaky, his hands still touching you and sending softly timid comfort through your body. He held your gaze for a second... and then, he finally kissed you back. 
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buckrecs · 1 year
Note
HELLO so i was wondering if you have some winter soldier x reader fics?? ive been trying to find some but theyre all so short (still amazing stories tho) tysm, i really appreciate you making recs
Winter Soldier!Bucky
masterlist | req masterlist
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ONESHOT
Into Cursed Pixie Dust by @buckets-and-trees
“He's credited over two dozen assassinations in the last fifty years…” but you don’t know that. You run into him once, then again, again, again. Destiny draws you together, and neither of you can deny the pull. And yet though he never ages, you do.
Stalker by @you-are-my-sanctuary
In which Bucky has a crush on the new PR manager and is being an adorable stalker.
sleepwalking by @lanadelreyscokewhor3
when your boyfriend bucky wakes up with the winter soldier mindest, you do the only thing you know how to do- comfort him. he does the only thing he knows how to thank you- possessive sex. 
Colors in the Dark by @buckychrist
The world is without color, and that’s never bothered the Winter Soldier. The Fist of HYDRA didn’t have time for love and soulmates. At almost a century old, what are the odds that his soulmate was even still living?
ephemeral by @earlgreydream
the winter soldier shows up wounded at your door during a storm.
Purgatory by @wkemeup
While on a mission, Bucky becomes dissociated into the Winter Soldier. But instead of becoming a threat, his instinct is to protect.
a soldier gone rouge by @kinanabinks
the winter soldier has been sent to kill you. why, then, are you so wet?
Reverse Psychology by @waiting4inspiration
Bucky’s Winter Soldier mode is triggered. But you have something up your sleeves that will bring him back.
Comply by @gogolucky13
With Hydra, everyone is a prisoner.
Don’t Fear the Reaper by @gogolucky13
One night, the Winter Soldier appears at your place of work to eliminate a target. He leaves you alive, only to return a few months later.
Fatal Mistake by @rookthorne
A rogue agent amidst their ranks, it was the perfect plan, a perfect escape. It was their fatal mistake. 
Wolf, Partner, Gloves… by @revengingbarnes
HYDRA’s words make Bucky go into Winter Soldier mode. Then he meets you, and you make for him words that will bring him back to normal.
the dragon and her shadow by @kashimos-hajime
You fall in love with the Winter Soldier, and they punish you for it. Sentiment is weakness, but what can they do? After all, they cannot kill the Fist of H.Y.D.R.A. and mortal men cannot even begin to comprehend slaying a dragon.
take it easy, romeo by @sunmoonandeddie
The Soldat remembers one person through it all.
You Found Me by @samthemarvelfan
Bucky Barnes always came home to you. What happens when he doesn't? Worse than that...what happens when he forgets you existed?
Gone Again by @tokoyamisstuff
The Winter Soldier is lost and confused, unable to remember a single thing - except for the place where he’d find the woman that had become his safe space.
I’ll Come Back for You by @milliedazzledust
something where he is in winter soldier mode and protecting the scientist (y/n) where she is the only one who can sort of calm him down after a mission.
Void by @theeleggymeggy
Working as a nurse at HYDRA, you find yourself intervening when you catch Alexander Pierce striking The Asset. You don’t even know this man, but you can’t just stand and watch him be beat down.
Sweet Memory by @
SERIES
One’s Promised by @invisibleanonymousmonsters
Living a double life was not a choice when one was the daughter of Alexander Pierce. Y/N was the youngest agents of SHIELD and one of the most respected threats within Hydra’s empire. No matter her allegiance, she was feared by both. Y/N Pierce would’ve tried to escape it all… if it hadn’t been for The Winter Soldier.
Soldat by @the-fallen-nightmare
Captain America and Reader have worked together at SHIELD for over a year. What happens when they have a run in with The Winter Solider and Steve finds out the secret Reader had been hiding from him all this time? And what happens when reader is captured by Hydra and The Winter Soldier, again. Can she make Soldat remember her or is her life with Steve just a slow fading memory now?
 
Breach by @darkmasterlistyouneveraskedfor (dark)
The reader finds herself in the Winter Soldier’s cross hairs during a lock down.
Reset by @lunarbuck
The government has fallen, Hydra has taken over. You were an agent of SHIELD long before the reign of terror began, and became a member of the resistance when they needed you most. Everything changes when the Winter Soldier captures you from your safe house.
Devil’s Backbone by @trashmenofmarvel
With your team dead and your mission failed, you’ve been taken by the assassin to an unknown location and are at the mercy of your cruel tormentors.
Krasavchik by @after-avenging-hours
While under orders from Karpov to test the Soldat’s loyalties to Hydra, you find yourself questioning your own loyalties.
Welcome Home… Soldat? by @winterarmyy
Y/N had make a habit of greeting Bucky a warm 'welcome home' everytime he came back from his missions, but there was one particular day when she unknowingly greeted someone else.
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moonvis · 3 months
Text
I NEED YOU ALIVE
Steve Rogers x F! Avenger! Reader Incl. Sam, Tony, and Bucky x Natasha Summary: Steve can't wait to propose, but when a mission goes south, he's not sure he'll get the chance after all Warnings: Angst to fluff! Some cursing. Some blood and injuries. 2.5k words.
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Steve carefully opened the blue velvet box in his hand, revealing a simple yet beautiful engagement ring. Light reflected onto the golden material, a small diamond on top. Steve knew his girl liked it simple, so that was what he got. A warming smile grew on his lips as he imagined the ring perfectly fit on her finger.
Bucky gently nudged at his pal’s side, a smirk present on his face. Steve chuckled as a response, speaking in a low voice, “This is it Buck. I’m proposing tonight after the mission.” It was Y/N and Steve’s two-year anniversary after all, but unfortunately they had to go on a last-minute mission before celebrating.
“M’ happy for you pal. She’s gonna love it.”
Steve had been carrying the ring in his picket ever since he bought it, looking at it every now and then  - even at the risk of Y/N spotting him. Bucky had reminded it of such many times before, “Might put it away before your girl sees it.”
The whole team were gathered inside the jet, but luckily Y/N was sat opposite of the super soldiers, occupied in a conversation with Natasha. Steve let out a happy sigh and closed the box, “You know how it is Buck…”
Bucky did indeed understand; he understood the excitement Steve was feeling, the thought of spending the rest of a lifetime with the love of his life. The former Winter Solider had proposed to Natasha just a few months earlier anyways.  
Bucky patted the blonde’s shoulder, “One more mission, and she’s all yours.”
“Right.” The Captain put the box back in his most secure pocket and got up. Time to get over with the mission. Walking into the middle of the jet, he spoke up, “Okay team. One last recall on the mission plan.”
Y/N gave him her immediate attention, admiring Steve in his Captain America stance. Steve gave her a small smile before he continued talking, “Y/N and Nat will get the files. Buck, Sam and I will go for the hostages, while Tony-” Steve turned to the billionaire, “You work as a shield around the base. This is a last-minute mission, which means we gotta be prepared for anything. Sam will back you up if needed.”
“Dream team,” Y/N commented from beside Natasha, giving her a pound, “Let’s go.”
Tony turned in his seat and prepared the jet for arrival, just outside the Hydra base, “Check your gear everyone! We land in three.”
As the they landed, Steve guided for Y/N to come over, which se gladly did. The Captain put his shield on his back, before caressing his girlfriend’s face, his brows softening as they made eye contact, “Be careful, okay? You know I hate separating from you on missions. So please, don’t take any unnecessary risks. I need you back in one piece.”
Unbeknownst to Y/N, Steve was referring to the upcoming secret proposal, thinking of the ring hidden in his pocket. He needed his future bride to make it back from the mission alive.
“That goes both ways,” Y/N raised a brow and smiled, “But yes, I promise.” With a quick kiss, they bid each other good luck before Y/N jogged off to join Natasha.
“Come on pal, let’s go.” Bucky said form beside the Captain. Steve couldn’t help feeling a little uneasy though, watching his girl disappear out of sight. Shrugging it off, he nodded at Bucky before leading the way.
Y/N and Natasha snuck up to the first entrance where four Hydra agents were guarding the door. Y/N looked over at the redhead mouthing, “Element of surprise?”, gaining a nod in response. On three, Y/N launched forward and kicked one man to the ground, before ducking as another tried to shoot her.
Natasha was already slamming the shooter into a third Hydra agent, while Y/N knocked out the guy beneath her. Finishing off, she shot the fourth and last guy running at Natasha. The girls gave each other a pound before continuing further into the base.
“Y/N look!”
Y/N turned to face Natasha, her eyes following whatever the redhead was pointing at. A staircase, leading up to a glass covered room holding what seemed like computers.
“Just what we were searching for,” Y/N winked and ran towards the stairs, stopping when a pair of Hydra agents suddenly appeared at the top. Y/N was a quick and precise shooter when it came to guns, not arrows, that was Barton’s specialty.
Fast, she brought out her gun and shot both agents in their head before they got the chance to react. Natasha came up beside her, impressed, “Not bad, but save some for me, will you?”
“Then you gotta keep up,” Y/N teased. Natassha rolled her eyes and followed her friend up the stairs. As they reached the computer-room, the coast seemed to be clear, with no booby-traps in sight.
“Awesome. Go do your thing,” Y/N winked at Natasha who entered the room, before she spoke into the comms, “Mission report. We found the computer-room.”
“Good. Get those files and stay on guard,” Steve reported back, “We just found the hostages. Getting them out now.”   
Natasha was skilled when it came to hacking, so downloading the files were like a baby’s work. It was when they thought they were safe to leave the base, things started to heat up.
“We got the files, heading out now!” Natasha spoke into the comms, following Y/N out of the room.
“Copy that.” The Captain sounded satisfied, “And the hostages are brought to safety. Everyone return to the jet.”   
While Tony gave his own report into the comms, the ladies of the team faced a sudden surprise outside the computer-room. Out of nowhere, a gunshot sounded through the hall, followed by the sound of Natasha’s agonizing scream.
She had been hit.
Y/N was quick to react and shot the Hydra agent who had fired and felt a knot in her stomach as she watched her friend fall to the floor. “Nat, shit!” Y/N rushed over and fell to her knees, “Hold still.”
Natasha had been shot through the leg, thick blood flowing out of her wound. Y/N ripped a piece of clothing of her own suit and wrapped it around the redhead’s leg. Bringing a hand up to her comm, her shaking voice spoke up, “Nat’s been hit! We need backup asap!”
“What!?” The frantic voice of Bucky sounded through the comms, “Where are you? I’m coming!”
“We’re just outside the computer room. West part of the base. Please, hurry!” Y/N’s worried voice responded back, before she shifted her attention back to Natasha, “Hold on Nat. Bucky’s coming.”
Natasha was weak, the wound being dangerously deep. The redhead brought out her hand for Y/N to hold, which she instantly accepted. Y/N felt scared, she couldn’t carry Natasha out of there herself, nor would she leave her behind. The last thing she needed was more Hydra agents approaching them in such a vulnerable state.
As if the universe hated them, the voices of more Hydra agents could be heard from downstairs, “They’re up there! Let’s go!”
Shit.
“Guys, hurry! There’s more agents and I can’t deal with them alone with Nat like this!” Y/N yelled into the comms, readying her gun for anything. Right now, protecting Natasha was the only thing she cared about.
“On my way!” Tony said though the comms, his voice stern with a hint of concern.
Steve felt his heart twist and turn, the sickening feeling in his stomach not helping. If he knew his girl correctly, she would do anything in her power to protect Natasha. Even if it meant putting her own life at risk. “Don’t do anything stupid Y/N! We’re on our way!”
“Hold on baby, I’m on my way!” Was Bucky’s words trough the comms. Natasha let out a shaky breath at his voice, clearly getting a bit of relief from it.
As the first Hydra agent made his way up the stairs, Y/N shot him in the head, making him fall into the one coming up right behind him. Y/N got up on her feet and saw at least six more agents running up to get them, “What the fuck?”
“Y/N you need to-” Natasha spoke thought a cough, “Get your ass out of here.”
“Forget it. I’m not leaving you.” Y/N’s voice was stern, so was her stance. As more agents ran towards her, she shot them. One, two and-
Her gun was out of bullets.
In the moment of panic, she took a step back before throwing her gun at the floor. Reaching for her knife, she spoke through the comms again, “My gun’s out, and these bitches keep on coming. Hurry!”
“Fuck, we’re almost there doll!” Steve was panicking. He could run fast alright, but coming from the other side of the base was quite the long way, “Tony!”
“Almost there Cap!”
Taking advantage of Y/N’s moment of distraction, the next Hydra agent tackled her to the floor. She usually managed to take out a guy alone, but as another agent joined in to hold her down, she struggled.
Natasha noticed and couldn’t just lay and watch. The redhead gritted her teeth together and lifted herself slightly off the floor, pointing her gun at one of the agents. Trough her blurred vision, she shot him in the arm. The man screamed in pain and let go of Y/N.
Unfortunately, the Hydra agent realised Natasha was still a threat, even in such a state, and went forward to grab her instead. The man lifted Natasha by the collar and dragged her towards the stairs, pointing his gun at her, “This is what you get little bitch!”
His words grabbed Y/N attention, her eyes widening, “No!”
Everything from there happened so fast. One second she was pushing Natasha out of the way, and the next, she was falling down the stairs with a fresh bullet-wound to her side.
In the moment of tragedy, Iron Man came flying in, catching Y/N only seconds away from having her head slammed on the cold hard ground. Holding her with one hand, he blasted the last remaining agents dead, before finally landing. Tony gently put her down, his mask revealing the distressed features on his face, “My god-”
“Natasha!” The yell and sight of Bucky came in view. He spotted his fiancé at the top of the stairs, not hesitating to get to her side. Right behind came Steve and Sam, having no idea what would meet their eyes.
The exact moment Steve spotted Y/N lying beside Tony, he felt his stomach drop. The Captain rushed to her side, falling onto his knees as dust flew in the air, “Oh my god--”
As Tony put pressure on her wound, Steve brought his hand up to caress her cheek, “Oh my god Y/N, you-”
“M’sorry Stevie…”
“No, don’t you say that!” Steve was panicking, his eyes going up to meet Tony’s, “What do we do?!”
Composing himself, Tony got up from the ground, “She don’t have much time. We need to get her help, asap! I’ll get the jet ready, you bring her.”  
Steve felt his breath quickening at Tony’s words. As he watched Iron Man fly off, Steve shifted his attention back to his girl. Fresh tears streamed down his cheeks as he spoke, “I’m sorry doll, but this is gonna hurt.” Steve, as gently as he could, lifted her up in his arms, shutting out her agonizing scream to concentrate.
“Hold on doll, I’m bringing you home,” Steve promised as he ran the fastest he ever had. He watched as his girl grew heavier in his arms, her eyelids trying to fall shut. “Don’t you dare close your eyes!” Fuck he was worried.
“I’m not losing you today doll, just keep your eyes open, please.” Steve begged as he noticed how quickly his girl faded.
“M’sleepy…” Y/N wasn’t thinking clearly anymore, not feeling much either. She was just happy her last moments would be in the hands of the man she loved.
“No, I can’t let you to that. You need to stay awake, sweetheart. Please.” Steve cried as Y/N’s eyes closed, knowing there was nothing else he could do but run. “No, no, no, Y/N! Stay with me, please!”
As Y/N went completely numb in his hands, the solider screamed out in frustration. The jet was right in front of him, and as soon as he got to lay her body down, he fell to his knees, silent sobs shaking his broad shoulders.
His hand reached into his pocket, fingers tightening around the blue velvet box. She couldn’t die on him, not like this. He still had an important question to ask her.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
Just like he had been doing for the last few days, Steve sat by her bedside, listening to the monitor telling him she was still alive.
Steve refused to leave her side. Sam had tried to at least make him take a shower after the mission, but he still wouldn't budge. Steve had to be present the exact moment Y/N woke up.
“Hey, pal,” Bucky entered the room, “How’s she doing?”
Steve let out a sigh, letting his eyes leave Y/N for just a moment to look at his friend, “You know… the same.”
“Hey, I could watch her for a while if you need some rest,” Bucky suggested, but the Captain only shoot his head, “You know she’s gonna be mad when she wake up and realises you didn’t take care of yourself.”
“So be it,” Steve stoke his thumb over the soft skin of her hand, “I just can’t leave her side. I thought she was gone Buck. You saw it! Her heart stopped, twice!” Fresh tears streamed down Steve’s face at the memory playing in his head.
The day on the injury, Y/N’s heart stopped twice if not more, and it scared the hell out of Steve. He had to see the world crumbling down before his eyes, only for the universe to prank him. It made him angry. Oh, how he hated Hydra, for almost taking away his future.
Bucky didn’t comment Steve’s words. It could easily have been Natasha in that situation, but Y/N had saved her without hesitation. He would be forever grateful – he just couldn’t bear the thought of his best friend losing the love of his life instead.
Luckily, Y/N was recovering.
“You look like shit…” A crocked voice came from the room. Steve’s head shot up in surprise, eyes landing on her beautiful ones looking back at him. Bucky smiled and rushed out of the room, going to get a doctor.
“Y/N? Oh my-” Steve gasped, rapid breaths escaping him, “Fuck, Y/N, I thought I lost you.” Steve reached forward and cupped her cheek, not even bothering to hold back the sobs that followed.
“M’sorry…” Y/N let out a shaky breath, still adjusting to the light and pain in her stomach, “And uh- how long was I out for?”
“Five days,” Steve responded, still in disbelief his girl was finally awake, “Thank god you’re okay, doll. I love you so damn much.”
Y/N was a little taken back by the number of days but shook it off as she watched Steve’s broken expression. She tapped at the empty spot beside her, guiding for Steve to lay down. He hesitated for a moment, scared of hurting her, but accepted when she looked at him with pleading eyes.
“How’s Natasha doing?” Y/N asked as she remembered the redhead.
“She’s okay,” Steve sounded a bit hesitant, “Thanks to you I’ve heard.”
“Steve… I’m sorry for being reckless, I just-”
Steve sighed and reassured her, “It’s okay, I’m just glad to have you back alive. We’ve been at this one before; I’d do the same for Bucky and so on.”
Y/N chuckled and rested her head against his shoulder, hearing his rapid heartbeat.
Letting out a shaky breath, Steve turned to face her properly, his eyes softening as he looked at her smile. He reached into his pocket to grab the blue velvet box he had so patiently waited to give her.
“Y/N, this is not how I imagined doing this, but-” Steve brought the box forwards. Y/N’s eyes widened at the sight, her hand coming up to cover her gasping mouth, “Steve…”
Steve opened the box to reveal the beautiful ring, his eyes plastered on her the whole time. Her widening smile and teary eyes made his heart melt, “After almost loosing you, I can’t wait any longer. Please, will you do me the biggest honour of becoming my wife?”
“Oh my gosh! Yes!” Y/N cheered with the little energy she had and let Steve put the perfectly fit ring on her finger, “It’s beautiful Steve!”
Steve let out a soft chuckle, “I know this isn’t an ideal way to propose but-”
“It’s perfect!” Y/N assured him and reached forward to press a kiss on his lips. Though as she moved, a sudden pain overwhelmd her stomach, “Fuck!”
“Shit, are you okay?” Steve went straight into being protective, watching his fiancé shut her eyes in pain. As she didn’t respond, he grew worried, at least, until she started giggling. “Fuck that hurt.”
“You scared me doll,” Steve let out a sigh and reached forward to plant a kiss on top of her head, “You sure know how to pain an old man’s heart.”
Before Y/N got the chance to respond, a doctor came into the room, Bucky following suit, “Sorry for ruining the moment, but we need to check if everything is okay.”
“That’s fine, I know you’ll take care of my fiancé.” Steve kissed the top of her head and left the bed, going to stand beside Bucky.
The brunette punched Steve in the arm, “Now you can finally stop the obsessive ring gazing. I’m happy for you pal.”
“Thanks Buck.” Steve's eyes didn’t leave her figure as he stood there. He watched as she laughed with the doctor, a smile plastered on her face, even though she just woke up from a fay day long coma. She was such a ray of sunshine – she warmed his heart.
Oh, and to believe she would be his for ever.
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